Indulge www.indulgemagazine.com.au
November 2011
spirit|soul|body Pastor
Leigh Ramsey Human Trafficking is NOT OK!
How to Develop Resilience in Your Children
Cathy Knechtli
Bringing Music to the Outback
Super Summer Salads
Dr Robi Sonderegger talks to us about family issues
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Indulge eMagazine is part of the iluvthoseshoes Project which seeks to empower women in their journey through life by resourcing them, spirit, soul and body. Empower = make more confident; to give authority Resource = source of help; solutions to problems
Publisher
iluvthoseshoes Project www.iluvthoseshoes.com
Editor-in-Chief
Charissa Steffens editor@indulgemagazine.com.au
Creative Director
Natasha Smith info@nspstudio.com.au
Technical Director
David Steffens info@indulgemagazine.com.au
Senior Editors Christy Carey Nicky Hurle
Theological Advisor
Reverend Malcolm Keynes (Dip. Ministry)
The Cover
Cover Pastor Leigh Ramsey Photography Natasha Smith, NSP Studio Photography Location Citipointe Church Brisbane
Fashion Editor Tanya Epis
Food Editor Angela Frost
Contributors
iluvthoseshoes Project www.iluvthoseshoes.com
General Enquiries T 0450 066 116 E info@iluvthoseshoes.com
Indulge eMagazine is published monthly by the ILTS Project Pty Ltd (ACN 147832906). All rights are reserved and the contents are copyright and may not be reproduced without the written consent of the publisher. ILTS Project (“the Publisher”), their related companies and officers herby disclaim, to the full extent permitted by law, all liability, damages, costs and expenses whatsoever arising from or in connection with copy information or other material in this magazine, any negligence of the publisher, or any person’s actions in reliance therein. Any dispute or complaint regarding placed advertisements must be made within seven days of publication. Inclusion of any copy must not be taken as any endorsement of the Publisher. Views expressed by contributors are personal views and they are not necessarily endorsed by the Publisher. All reasonable efforts have been made to trace copyright holders by the Publisher. The Publisher and the authors do not accept any liability whatsoever in respect of any action taken by readers in reliance on the recommendation set out in this magazine.
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Dr Cris Beer Kirsten Cooke Michelle Evans Nicky Hurle Barrie Nicholson Candice Schmidt Charissa Steffens
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contents soul
spirit Designing Women 2011
Pastor Leigh Ramsey
Our special interview
Cathy Knechtli She is Worship
Who Decides What’s Beautiful? Part 2
The Power of One
Handmade with Love
Developing Resilience in Children
5 Simple Strategies to Improve your Health
Nicky Hurle
Barrie Nicholson
Michelle Dennis Evans Book Review
10
Dr Cris Beer
She Rescue Home
Colouring our world!
Dr Robi Sonderegger
body
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Tanya Epis
Kirsten Cooke Angela Frost
Super Summer Salads
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from the editor
portant not to im o to e ar at th s am dre you There are just some After all, where would k? in th u yo ’t n o d e ed to be changed, som be passionate about Christ? Some things ne
ssion of begin. and I be if not for the pa d some things need to an d pe op st be to ed things ne use ssion and put it to good pa r ei th n ke ta ve ha o ople wh have a good This issue is full of pe us think that while we of y an M s. itie al re to s in us to make a and turned their dream exists, it is too big for at th m le ob pr a by ly d the matter is that it on of idea, or we are outrage ct fa e Th t. ar st to e know wher ep at a difference or we don’t n build anything one st ca u yo d an e nc re ffe di make a takes one to begin to make a start. time. We just need to Pastor Jane ch people. People like su st ju e ur at fe we e lg help women In this issue of Indu ence five years ago to er nf co ’s en m wo a d ea te Averill who star ger who desires to mak eg er nd So bi Ro Dr d; ve or Leigh Ramsey who st understand they are lo Pa ly; al ob gl d an lly has es both loca d; Cathy Knechtli who difference in families liv an rls gi ge ra de un of g traffickin e faith said “It’s not ok!” to the are all Champions of th ey Th n. re ild ch ol ho ack sc brought music to outb le. and Champions of peop rtise to bring their own expe ue in nt co o wh s or ut lar contrib th We also have our regu y your journey this mon jo en n ca u yo of e on at each to Indulge to ensure th Spirit, Soul and Body. of December we will be as e; lg du In of ue iss ly d, in last month This issue will be our u remain well resource yo at th So . th on m nd y seco sting new publishing Indulge ever agazine, we will be po em sy os gl r ou of s ue iss to enjoy. between the bimonthly r Indulge blog for you ou on s tip d an es cip and fresh articles, re Many blessings!
Love Charissa 6 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
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Designing Women 2011
Colouring our World!
Story: Charissa Steffens Photography: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography
Colour popped everywhere you looked at this year’s Designing Women Conference hosted by Nexus Church in Brisbane, Australia. The stage was resplendently decorated by over one thousand handmade pom-pom’s, which were beautifully displayed in a heart and U shape. The delight was obvious upon the women’s faces as they received this loving message from the stage. The Designing Women Conference is the creation of Senior Pastor Jane Averill who desired to “inspire and bless women” when she first began the conference five years ago. The day conference has grown from 300 women in its first year to 800 women by 2011 and Jane dreams of it continuing to draw women near and far. “We hope that our Designing Women guests leave pampered, blessed, inspired and looking forward to next year’s conference” said Jane. There is much to feel pampered about as Jane and her talented Women’s Director Kate Bishop, work
with a team of over 100 staff and volunteers to bring together a feminine feast that indulges you Body, Soul and Spirit. This year’s speakers included Clinical Psychologist Dr Robi Sonderegger, Elissa Macpherson and Annie Gibney who all brilliantly connected with the delegates in their own unique ways. International performer Elly Hanssen, from New Zealand, spent the day speaking into the lives of the High School aged girls and taught them some new moves, which they performed in the conference finale. With superb food (my personal favourite was the crème brulee chocolate cup) catered by Penny Robinson, great shopping in the market area and phenomenal music performances by the gifted team at Nexus, it truly was a day that ‘coloured our world with happiness all the way!’ Next year’s Designing Women Conference will be held on Saturday 27th October and you can prepurchase your ticket by going to www.dw2012.com.au
Senior Pastors Murray & Jane Averill and Women’s Director Kate Bishop 8 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
Dr Robbie Sonderegger
Elissa Macpherson
Annie Gibney
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Our Interview with
Dr Robi Sonderegger
Story: Candice Schmidt Photography: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography
Dr Robi Sonderegger is a world renowned Clinical Psychologist. He is a public speaker in demand both locally and overseas and has a heart for God and a desire to make a difference in the world. He regularly goes into war torn areas
and disaster zones to train teams, offer trauma counselling and develop rehabilitation programs, but he also works to bring about lasting change in these nations, for example trying to end child slavery in Haiti. He desires to “be a voice for children whose cry goes unheard”. On Australian soil, he is the Chief Executive of Family Challenge Australia (www.familychallenge. com.au) which provides specialist psychology services. Through therapy, programs and teaching he is helping adults and children to build better relationships and live emotionally healthy and balanced lives. I first heard Dr Robi when he spoke at the Colour Conference in Sydney. He is entertaining to listen to as he shares practical wisdom about how to live our lives better. I was moved hearing about the work he had been doing in Northern Uganda to help bring healing to child soldiers and those maimed physically and emotionally through war. As a wife, mum and woman, I have benefitted greatly through his teachings and so was very excited to hear we had an opportunity to interview Dr Robi for Indulge eMagazine. I hope you enjoy the following thoughts he shared with us. Candice: I heard Dr Robi that you were a professional snowboarder and that you love Swiss fondues and yodeling. Is that true? Dr Robi: It is a rumour (laughing…) no, it is true,
I think there is much to be desired about the Swiss culture. I am a big fan of all things Swiss; cows and chocolate and cheese. Candice: Is it also true that you gave snowboard lessons to Prince Charles and Prince Harry? Dr Robi: Yes it is, it was a past life but, yes I did. It was actually a really great experience. The resort I was working at said that the Royal Family were coming snowboarding for the first time and so I put my hand up and said, “I speak English, I will teach them”. It was quite an eye opening experience to hangout with the Royal family on their holiday. Candice: In your role as family man, can you tell us a little bit about yourself – How old are your children? Dr Robi: We have four kids, who range from seven months up to eight years old. They are young kids but we are passionate about celebrating the value of ‘family’. I think that is our first ministry, to our own family. I think that is one of the great things about our day and age is that we get to do ministry together. The kids get to go to Cambodia and go to Northern Uganda and they get to see how other children live and that is exciting as a parent to instill that insight and education into my own kids.
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Candice: You lead a very full schedule with lots of travel; how do you manage to balance family and work life? Dr Robi: Wherever possible we take family with us, so I am very rarely on the road on my own. If my wife can’t come then the children will line up and take turns and come with me. So it doesn’t matter where I am, if I am in Africa or Eastern Europe or London or America, someone will come, except if it is really dangerous like a war zone or disaster zone.
tantrum or chairs across the room and we say “Ah that child must have…” and we run off a list of different disorders such as ASD, ODD, ADD or whatever the “D” is for the day. We would actually challenge that and say that the most common type of childhood pathology is not the behavioural disorders but the emotional disorders. Childhood anxiety is the most prevalent and common of the disorders in Australia and unfortunately childhood anxiety is a precursor for the development of adolescent depression. They share the same chemical and hormonal pathways in the brain Candice: What parenting key do you know now and the body and so if a young child doesn’t get that you wish you had known when you were a new treatment for their anxiety they are at a greater risk parent? for developing adolescent depression; but that is Dr Robi: I think with our clinical psychology both good news and bad news. The good news is (backgrounds) we knew all the theory for that if they do get treatment, the research that is parenting and so it is one thing to know all the coming out now is saying that you can just about theory and another to put it into practice. In prevent the development of depression in their academia you look to the ideal of what it is to be adolescent and their adult life because they learn doing parenting in ‘the correct way’ and I think skills for life. that I see ‘the correct way’ as being less and less From the parents perspective it is always about the important. Rather than doing the right behaviour relationship. It doesn’t matter what the presenting management strategy and doing it well, to focus condition is. They might come in with panic on the child’s heart rather than on their outward performance; Rather than shaping their behaviour, attacks or depression, and these might be very real and it is certainly not to minimize them, but I want to shape the character and content of their if you peel back the layers, like an onion, almost heart and if I can focus on loving my kid then I always there is a relational issue that underpins can create a fertile soil that anything will grow the depression or the condition. So investing in in as opposed to concentrating on what kind of children’s lives starts with investing in mum and plant pruning and all the ‘trimming’ - behaviour dad’s relationship. If we can get that solid then to management techniques. So rather than the a large degree, we can minimise the extent of their behavior management techniques I want to focus mental, behavioural, emotional and health issues, on behavioural influence.If we can capture their heart we will get their behaviour and performance broadly speaking as we can’t lump everyone into that one basket. also. Candice: In your practice you deal with children who have serious problems such as behaviour and emotional issues. What are some of the most common issues families are struggling with? Dr Robi: It does vary season to season and it varies between the demographics as well; what the parents are struggling with is different to what the children are struggling with. Stereotypically we think of childhood mental health issues as being behavioural issues and so it is easy to see the kid who is throwing the
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Candice: So you are working on the husband – wife relationship as well as the parent – child relationship. Dr Robi: Yes, we would go so far as to say that a child is like a sapling planted in the ground and when they are young you want to put a stick next to them so that the wind doesn’t blow them over; you want to give them the right amount of water, sunshine and so we mollycoddle little children. But as they grow up into the adolescent years their roots grow deep into the soil and they start to draw
their own water from underground and nutrients from the soil and we don’t need to fuss over them or micromanage them as much. It is important to prune back the adolescent at times otherwise their fruit will be a little bit wild but we all tend to gloss over the type of soil in which that child is planted. That soil is representative of mum and dad’s relationship and developmental psychology is coming out overwhelmingly in Australia stating that the relationship between mum and dad has a direct bearing on the child’s development. This is very challenging in this day and age when relationships are hit and miss, and that is not to say that relationships in breakdown aren’t for understandable reasons, but it goes to show that it takes more than one person to raise children and if there aren’t two parents then it is always wise to incorporate extended family and friends – let’s do this in community not in isolation because children need a village. Candice: Can you give some characteristics of successful parenting? Dr Robi: A parent who understands the philosophy that the relationship comes before the rules. We live and operate by a mantra that says: Rules before relationship results in resentment and rebellion; relationship before rules results in
respect. So if a parent is really successful, you clearly see that they have got the relationship as the primary foundation and because of that relationship the respect is evident within the child and the functional behaviour and performance and respect for others comes as a default. Candice: Do you have an example of a situation where you have gone in to help make a difference and then walked away feeling you are the one that has been helped a lot more? Dr Robi: That is a good question… probably what I would say is that often when I speak from the stage or even with a client, often things that come out of my mouth are not preconceived, they are not my ideas and sometimes I speak them and I go “That was amazing” (laughing) “I’ve got to write that down”. It is a Divine connection that I am learning as I am speaking and I will often get down off stage and go ‘Wow! I just ministered to myself’. I find that if I am going through a challenge, often that will be the topic that I am requested to speak on and I sometimes don’t feel qualified to get up and speak… the reality is that we all ‘fall short of the Glory of God’ and I think that (speaking) is just a wonderful opportunity for me to be ministered to as well. I see myself as just a vessel, for information to flow through, I am not some guru who has got it all together.
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Candice: In closing, we at Indulge Magazine believe God wants us to thrive - Spirit, Soul and Body. Can you give one key piece of advice to our readers that can make a difference to living better? Dr Robi: Don’t be extreme, be balanced, I think that is the key. In Christendom we can be very easily swayed into the extremes. We can get super spiritual about things and then we can get super pragmatic about things instead of being balanced about those things. I love reading the book of 1 Kings and seeing how God ministered to Elijah when he was suicidal. He didn’t send some angel to do deliverance and spiritual warfare, he sent an angel to touch him, to feed him and give him drink and to say ‘sleep’ and then he did it all over again, so he ministered to his body. God is a really practical God and if we are exhausted then we need rest not deliverance ministry. On the flip side, it is not just about the rest, it is about putting ourselves into a position of renewed strength as we wait upon the Lord, so that God can then reveal Himself to us. God does come to Elijah and asks him some questions and Elijah speaks and God corrects his thinking. There is a role for God to speak truth over our lives because it is that truth that sets us free. So rather than being extreme, lets understand we are a physical being and have spiritual experiences in a physical body and lets tap into the best of both worlds. Be balanced. 14 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
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SPIRIT She Is....
Worship
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Story: Charissa Steffens Photography: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography
C
athy Knechtli is many things, funny... in fact down right hilarious, talented, gracious and a wonderful worship leader. I had the privilege of meeting Cathy at the “She Is” Conferences run by Sue Peters (State Director of QLD Baptist Women’s Ministry) earlier in the year. Cathy is the Worship Leader for the annual She Is Conferences and her presence on stage is powerful. Whilst chatting to Cathy she shared with me about her recent life changing experience of relocating to Western Queensland. Having spent some time in Western NSW myself, my heart immediately connected with her journey of leaving behind the city lights for the open, often dusty, outback plains. What is inspirational is the way that Cathy has embraced this season in her life. She saw a need and volunteered her passion to create choirs in a school with no music. She is... amazing!
Can you tell us a bit about yourself? Cathy: I am one of 7 kids, we moved around a lot up until I started high school. My mum became a Christian not long before I was born, so I have always had a Christian influence in my life. My Mum and Dad are still married after 54 years (unusual these days!) I met Jesus when I was 9, when we were living out here in Hughenden for 18 months, through the local Baptist Church. The year I started high school we moved back to the Sunshine Coast and started attending the Noosa Baptist Church. I was heavily involved in the youth group, and worship team, although I did go through some rebellious stuff. I left school and moved out of home at 16, but even though I was being a ratbag, God was still a constant in my life. I moved home at 19 and got married at 20, after meeting David at youth group when I was 15. (That’s a whole other story!!) Have you always been involved in music? Cathy: Music has always been a part of my life. My Mum is an awesome piano player, and she made sure we had the opportunity to sing or learn an instrument no matter where we were. Out of all of us kids, 5 of us are involved in music in some way. Two of my brothers make their living as musicians. Mum taught me to read music when I was 5, I learnt violin for 4 years in primary school, as well as being in school and town choirs depending on where we lived. In high school I learnt clarinet, which I played in the church 18 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
worship team for many years. In my early 20’s I decided I wanted to play an instrument so that I could sing as well as play so I taught myself the keyboard, and have played it ever since. I was in a band in my early 20’s for a few years, and again in the last couple of years. Why do you love music? Cathy: I believe that I have a God given passion for music. I love being part of a band, and working together to bring a song to life, all the different instruments and voices have their part to play. Each may not be much on its own but together they make a beautiful sound. I love working with musicians, they are creative, crazy people and I love the fun we have. I often hear God speak to me through songs. I find some music very emotive, and am often brought to tears. When did you start songwriting? Cathy: Well, I started songwriting when I came to Hughenden this year. It’s not something I ever thought I could do even though I’d had encouragement from a few people over the years. Just before we moved up, I had about 4 or 5 people say to me that they really believed that I would do some songwriting up here. When we moved up, it was in the middle of the floods, so because of that, it was a month or more before I got my keyboard unpacked and was able to sit down to play without any distractions. I got out some worship music, got about halfway
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through a song and just cried. Here I was, out here in the middle of nowhere. I didn’t know anyone and was just crying out to God. In the midst of all that He gave me the song ‘You are Freedom’. Seriously, He wrote it, in about an hour that morning. Music, words, the lot. It’s had a little refining since but not much. I’ve written another song since, and I am excited to see what else He gives me. Why did you join the SHE IS worship team? Cathy: I was at a crossroads in my life in regards to music. I was leading worship at my local church, and was in a rock band, which was finishing up, and I was praying to see where God wanted me to go. I have a real passion for worship and for seeing people come before His throne, so when I was asked to be part of the team I said yes straight away. It was God’s answer to my prayer. What has that experience given you? Cathy: Mmm, big question. One of the biggest things it has given me has been the opportunity to lead worship without the constraints that were placed on me by the local church. I am able to lead freely, and fully, how I believe God wants me to lead without having to hold back. It’s also been fantastic this year, building up a network of women from all over Queensland who share my passion for worship. And of course being part of such an awesome team is a privilege!! What is one of the biggest things that God has taught you recently? Cathy: As a musician growing up in the church, I was told for years to ‘not perform’, that I had to ‘stand still’ and ‘not show off’. As I was about to lead my first conference at Mapleton last year, I really felt God say to me, “I made you to be the person you are, exuberant, full of life and passion. Forget about the expectations that have been put on you to ‘not perform’. Go out and be the person I created you to be.” This released me from all those years of being ‘put in a box’, and I was able to really be free to worship My God and to lead His people the way He wants me to.
Why did you shift from Noosa to Hughenden? Cathy: My Husband became a teacher, and for him to get a permanent job he needed to do country service. We were offered another placement at the beginning on 2010 but really didn’t feel God wanted us to go at that time, and He then provided David with a year’s contract at Noosaville. At the end of last year as that was finishing up, we got the call with a job offer to come to Hughenden. We really believed this was right for us, we’d applied to go anywhere, and out of all the schools in Queensland we got offered a place where I’d lived as a child. So, we packed up and here we are… Tell us about the choir you have started? Cathy: I’ve started a choir in the school, it’s open to all ages, and I have about 30 kids from Prep to Year 7. Out of that I also have a vocal group of about 10 Year 6 and 7 girls. There’s no music in the school out here and I really felt that starting the choir was something that I could do to get some music happening! The kids love it, and we have a really good time together. We’ve performed a few times on parade, and at our school chaplain’s commissioning service, and since our school is P-12, we have the opportunity to perform at speech night later in the year and also at a Christmas concert. I love that when I come into the school, I have these cute little preppies coming up for a hug, as well as the year 6/7 girls. They are a great bunch of kids and I love working with them. I’m thinking next year of having a junior choir (Prep to Year 4) and a senior choir (Year 5 and up). I’m hoping to get some of the high school kids involved and with my Year 7’s moving up next year I should be able to. How is life different out west than it is on the coast? Cathy: Mmmmm, where do I start? Positives… Life is much simpler, there are not so many things demanding my time and attention. There are fewer expectations on me. I have lots of time to spend with God, that I didn’t have before. I have time to learn new things (guitar).
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It’s much cheaper in some things, eg piano and guitar lessons for my kids School is much cheaper as well.The washing dries on the line in an hour, its HOT HOT HOT!!! Negatives… being so far away from the closest major town. We have no dentist in Hughenden, and only one doctor. There are a lot of things we used to take for granted that we don’t have out here, but you learn to live with it. Having to travel 2.5 hours each way to do my major grocery shopping, as I can’t afford to do it here. I miss my friends and family… It’s a very different culturally out here than on the coast. Not a lot of people go to the local churches. The people here are very hard working, and we’ve had some instances where people who we didn’t even know have helped us out. For example, when we first arrived, we had no car, and this lady knocked on our door and said, “Here’s a car you can borrow til yours arrives”. We’d never met her before, but now she and her family are good friends of ours. What are some major issues where you live? Cathy: This little town is struggling to survive, it’s about half the size it was when I lived here as a kid. The railway is one of the biggest employers in the town, and over the years it has shrunk in size, which means less jobs, and less people in town. In the first 3 months we were here we saw three businesses close down. A lot of the town businesses are for sale, and have been for quite a while. There is also not much in town for the youth to do. There are no youth groups as such, so once the kids hit high school there’s not a lot for them to do, which leads to some roaming the streets at night. There’s a real need here for some type of youth work. Why did your husband decide to retrain as a teacher later in life? Cathy: He worked in retail, and when my eldest daughter was in Year 1, she asked him would he ever be around for the Christmas holidays. He’d always had in the back of his head that he’d like to 22 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
teach, and God made it possible financially for him to go to uni, without having to work as well. How have your children handled the change? Cathy: My kids love it. The eldest (she’s in Year 7) took a little while to settle in but now doesn’t want to leave. Being a small community, they get to be good at things as there’s not as much competition. Aimee only has 4 girls in her Year 7 class, which means only 4 girls in her age group. They all do gymnastics and piano/guitar lessons, they all sing in my choir, and play sport at school. They struggled a little bit only having a couple of other kids in the church and no Sunday school, but they help out during the service and are starting to find their place. What makes you cry? Cathy: Seeing people that I love treated badly, seeing people hurting and not being able to do something about it or be there for them because I’m so far away. Seeing when evil seems to triumph over good, when friends fall away from Jesus, when people manipulate circumstances for their own good and hurt others in the process. What makes you laugh? Cathy: When David (my husband) does crazy nutty things. Watching my kids chase their ducklings around the back yard (those things are impossible to catch!!). My Dad’s cheeky sense of humour, (he’s 88!!). At camp, talking about crazy stuff with my girlfriends, we normally laugh until we cry! Reminiscing over the insane stuff we did as kids! When I trust my worship teams with one of the songs I’ve written, and I get to a rehearsal and they totally ham it up!! Lots of laughs with my worship team! Any talk about farting, burping and all manner of bodily functions!! Where do you see yourself in five years? Cathy: In five years’ time I don’t think we’ll still be here in Hughenden. With the kids being in High School I’d like to either be back on the coast or in a larger town with more choices for the kids. Ministry wise, I’d love to be continuing doing what I’m doing now, but will have to wait and see what God has planned for us down the track.
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SOUL
It is time to make a difference... Story: Charissa Steffens Photography: Natasha Smith NSP Studio Photography
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I
t is difficult to believe that in our modern world human trafficking is occurring at an alarming rate. The time-old issues of poverty and unemployment, coupled with the opening of international borders and the growth of tourism have contributed to the rise of such human rights violations. The United Nations estimates that over 4 million women and children are trafficked predominately for sexual exploitation (SIREN, 2008). Children as young as 5 are being sold as sex slaves by family members, neighbours or just ruthlessly abducted only to become a statistic in an industry that generates $36 billion a year. The sheer enormity of these statistics can obscure the reality of this issue. These ‘numbers’ represent people; women and innocent children who have no voice and are often forced or tricked into slavery. This truth was brought home to Pastor Leigh Ramsey and her sister-in-law Hilary as they experienced first hand two children who needed someone to say ‘this is not ok’. It was from these exchanges that Leigh and Hilary knew they had to do ‘whatever it took’ to make a difference. In our Soul section this month Charissa Steffens interviews Pastor Leigh and Hilary about their fight to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves. A journey which has led them to establish the She Rescue Home in Cambodia for girls who are liberated from trafficking. How long have you been Pastoring at Citipointe Brisbane? Leigh: We have been here for ten years. Before that we were in Noosa Heads for nine years where we started a Christian Outreach Centre and from Noosa we went to America for four years where we also started a Christian Outreach Centre and then we came back here to take up the position in Brisbane. The Brisbane church had about 1500 people when we arrived and we now have over 5000 people, with three Brisbane Campuses and one in Fort Collins in Colorado. Could you share with us your journey to finding Jesus? Leigh: I had fun growing up. I had a great home but we were very liberal. It gave me warped dreams about my future; I often say that when I was younger I wanted to be a pole dancer by night and a nun by day. I was very aware of the spiritual from a young age. Séance’s and Ouija boards, not television, were our after dinner entertainment. I went to a Catholic boarding school because I wanted to and it was fun. I had a love for the ‘nun’ world. We had an awesome time; we would have séances in the steeple and midnight feasts; it was crazy, not what people would expect at all. I had my first experience with Christ one morning in mass. I went and told the nuns and they simply said ‘that’s nice’ and then sent me off. I was about 13 at the time and it was a definite encounter with Christ, but I had nowhere to go with it.
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When I was about 21 my mum became a Christian through her own situation and circumstances. We were living on the Sunshine Coast and she wanted us to take her to church; we went and I got saved that night.
Senior Pastor Leigh Ramsey Citipointe Church Brisbane & Founder of She Rescue Homes Cambodia
Indulge | November 2011 | 27
After being heavily involved in the Occult, how difficult was it to be free of that? It took about six years. I was not practicing any more, but I was aware and would often participate in altar calls. After about six years I went forward for prayer on the subject and just felt nothing and I realised I was ok now. When did you and Mark decide to go into fulltime Ministry? Leigh: We had been in church for about three years when we decided to start the Noosa Church. My husband was in business and his company at the time was wanting him to begin the big promotional journey, but we felt that starting the church was the right thing for us. What drew you to the issue of human trafficking in Cambodia? Leigh: It actually all started in Noosa. We had been out for dinner and we were headed home and we saw a woman with a little girl who was four or five. The little girl was saying “Mummy! Mummy! Don’t hit me! I love you! I promise I love you! Don’t hurt me!” and the mother was hitting her and kicking her in front of me. I was thinking ‘Is this real? This is Noosa, this is where I raised my children, this is not normal’ and I was wondering what to do. Do I ignore this? What do I do? I am on holidays; if I help what does that mean?’ And while I am thinking those thoughts it happened again and the little girl was screaming and crying and everyone else was ignoring her. I just thought ‘Ok, I need to help regardless’. So I followed them and I just sat with the mother and said “Let me help you.” We were able to help and got some of her family to come and be with her.
We came home and Hilary had already heard about the trafficking of children. Hilary: I was just about to go on a trip around the world with my son and I was going to Thailand. On the day I was leaving I was asked to pop into Cambodia for two days. While I was there I met people who were working to prevent trafficking and were setting up centres and I shared that with Leigh. She had said to me before we left that we needed to do something about this and to find out more. Leigh: We also had a guy in our church at that time who had just returned from Thailand and he had worked in rescuing trafficked children. He shared with us stories that were horrific and showed us pictures of children in soup pots being boiled. There were about six of us… and we were all horrified. We were like ‘Where have we all been that we do not know that this is going on? This is really wrong.’
‘Ok, I need to help regardless’
I walked away from that experience and (my heart) completely broke. That was not my world, I was not raised around that sort of stuff and I was devastated. I think God just used that moment to bring me to a realisation that I needed to speak up for children who can’t speak up for themselves. 28 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
It was at that point that Hilary and I decided to get on a plane and go to Cambodia and find out how real this was.
How did this trip change your life? Leigh: We went to Cambodia and Thailand and met many people and children who had been rescued. It was very overwhelming and the whole time we were there we would write on our arms “To succumb to the enormity of the problem is to fail the one.” Hilary: This is a quote from a book called “Terrify No More” by Garry Haugen founder of International Justice Mission (IJM). Leigh: To be honest I can’t even remember a lot from that book except for that phrase: “To succumb to the enormity of the problem is to fail the one.” It was so overwhelming and while we were there, because we were looking, we saw so much. One thing would lead to the next and we would think ‘This is ridiculous, it is too much; how do we even begin to help?’
Indulge | November 2011 | 29
Hillary Ramsey Director She Rescue Homes Cambodia
“My friend! My friend ten. Mother father sell. You help, you come!� 30 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
We headed to Thailand, but as soon as we landed we just knew we were in the right house, but the wrong room. We fulfilled our commitments and headed back to Cambodia and met with some more people. On our last night there we were eating dinner (everyone tries to sell you something) and there was this little girl with big red sunglasses standing behind a pole and she said “You buy a book?” We said no but asked if she was hungry and she responded “So hungry! So hungry!” So we bought her some dinner and as we were sitting there eating, we showed her a piece of paper which had a picture on it of a young Cambodian girl walking off with a western man. As soon as she saw it she knew; she knew what we knew and she grabbed our arms and dragged us saying “My friend! My friend ten. Mother father sell. You help, you come!” and she tried to drag us off down the street. It was then that we knew, this was not just going to some organisation and talking to people; this was a real child of twelve who suddenly found food no longer meant anything to her, just her friend who was only ten whose parents had sold her that night. So we rang IJM and World Hope and told them about the situation. We came home and said “Whatever it takes”. Organisations have wanted us to just raise money for them and I have no problem with that, but at no stage did we feel that’s what God was asking of us. In doing something I wanted to make sure it was Christ centered and not just welfare.
Did you have people on the other side with local knowledge to help you set up? Hilary: Yes we had a great couple who had been over there for a number of years and we got connected with them and they just really felt to help us. They set up the physical home. Renting, furnishings and trained the staff. Our original trip was in 2006 and we took in our first girls in April 2008.
Leigh: So it took us almost two years to do it well. You can’t just go into a country and start running into brothels and rescuing girls. We don’t do that; we are an after-care facility. We do not rescue, we work with those who rescue. It is very specified as it is legally challenging to rescue and you can’t go into premises and take people. You have to work with a legitimate organisation and the police department. Hilary: This is part of the challenge because they will identify underage girls and go to rescue them, but they will be gone because they were tipped off from within the police department.
Is a large factor in this issue the position of women within the culture? Hilary: There is a Cambodian proverb that says ‘Men are like gold, women are like white cloth’. The white cloth, once it has been stained or dirtied, can never be cleaned again, but gold can be cleaned again. That is how they view women, so if you have lost your virginity you are worthless. It does not matter how old you are, six or seven or if you were raped, you are worthless and no good for anything but to be a sex worker. We see a lot of young girls that have been raped because those girls are very vulnerable to being trafficked. It can be anyone who trafficks them. It can be a neighbour, aunty, grandmother… the parents come home and they are just gone. Indulge | November 2011 | 31
Leigh:It is very complicated; it is not just the trafficked children but those that are raped, even as young as eight, they know that they are most likely to end up in a brothel if that happens to them. We work with the trafficked, prostituted, raped, and we have had a couple who were on the brink of being sold, so we do take in at-risk cases as well. Hilary: There are situations even within the home; a family gets into some financial difficulties so they will sell the daughters for sex to pay off the debts. They might not be sold permanently but just a number of times to get the family out of trouble. It could have been something like a health issue that caused the debt.
What age are the girls you work with? Leigh: Generally fifteen years and under. We don’t work with the older girls but in saying that, if someone came to us who was in trouble we would do a journey with them, but we don’t take them in. How long does a girl stay when she arrives at the She home? Hilary: Some girls will never be able to go home, so we would like to establish a family home for this group. We also have a Transition Home which opened in January where girls we are working towards reintegration can live once their court
“...a family gets into some financial difficulties so they will sell the daughters for sex to pay off the debts.” 32 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
case has been completed. This is a more traditional khmer home with a house mum. This home doesn’t have security guards and the girls have more freedom to ride their bikes and play in the streets Once a girl is reintegrated back to her family we always have to monitor things though as situations arise and things can change quickly. Our social workers check in with them regularly for at least 3 years after they leave.
How many She Rescue Home’s are operating at the moment? Hilary: We have one high security home, with guards, that accommodates 24 girls. We also have the transition home that takes up to 6 girls and we want to open a family home in the next 12 months that can accommodate 6 girls that have nowhere to go. Are the girls reintegrated back into their own families at the end of their stay? Leigh: We try to integrate back into the family where possible, but it needs to be thoroughly investigated before they can be returned. Our Social workers work with the family. Poverty is a really big driver and so if they (the family) have no employment we start a micro enterprise for the families to have an income. There are people teaching the girls how to sew, hairdressing, all different skills. Our girls are children so they don’t work, we find work for the family. Hilary: Two of the main products we sell to support our families are gift bags, that are great for conferences, and armbands. Both can be customised and we take orders from as little as 20 upwards. The price of the products covers the costs and provides a sustainable income for the families. We now employ thirteen families. The girls get pocket money for helping out,but they are not employed.
‘To succumb to the enormity of the problem is to fail the one’
Indulge | November 2011 | 33
What do you say to people who look at this problem and feel overwhelmed by the enormity of the issue? Leigh: The biggest way to help is first to overcome your hangups. To succumb to the enormity of your challenges fails you… you’re the one that you’re failing. If you can sort you out, quite often you then have the capacity to help the next one. You don’t have to help 100, just the next one.
Hilary: It is a very expensive project. We have an almost 1:1 ratio within the homes and many of those staff we are training as well as paying wages. We do have sponsorship, but it is different from Compassion or World Vision where the children remain in their families. So we usually have more than one sponsor for each girl to help cover the cost of housing, security, food, counselling and educating. The girls identities are protected for obvious reasons.
Where did your slogan “it’s not ok” come from? Leigh: I was speaking with someone and my heart was broken about the whole issue. I was saying “This is not right what is happening with children.” They said to me “But you do know this has been going on for years” and I said “So that makes it ok? It’s not ok, I am not ok with this. I am not going to ignore it.” It is not ok that people are doing this to other people, especially children. God brought this to us, we didn’t go looking for it. He made us aware of it and I see it as a gift for us to take care of. They are His before they are ours.
How can people support the She Rescue Home? Hilary: We had our first “Its not OK challenge” in July which was a fun run/walk to raise awareness and funds for the She Home. This was a huge success and will be a yearly event and we would love people in SE Qld to join us next year. We have mission trips where teams go over and help out. We have volunteers that go and stay for longer periods like six months. We love people to go over particularly if they have skills such as social work, counseling, business, teaching and administrating, who can empower our staff and help train them. They are given sensitivity training to ensure the girls are respected. We also train them to ensure they are not completely overwhelmed by what they will face when they are there. It is not pleasant at times and can be quite stressful.
How does the Citipointe local church support the She Rescue Home? Leigh: Our church has been amazing. We honestly could not have started this without Citipointe getting behind it. It is local church funding that has brought us this far but it is now starting to broaden. Joyce Myer, Lisa Bevere and Life Outreach International are supporting us and other churches are supporting us. I am good friends with Bobbie Houston and Chris Caine and they have both been very supportive. Bobbie allowed us to come to the Colour conference this year and sell our merchandise. Chris and I talk regularly about her work in Greece with the A21 Campaign, and our homes in Cambodia. She supports us with the large platform that she has for those who might be interested in helping in the Asian region.
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Within Australia we need volunteers to help with administration and the goods we sell through our online shop or at conferences. We have ‘She Advocates’ that have parties and sell goods that we import from Cambodia. Sometimes they have a coffee & cake night or a Zumba night. These are great; these girls’ nights bring awareness and raise valuable funds for the homes. Of course our customised armbands and conference bags are available from our online shop. We have youth camps, schools, conferences and many other groups ordering them for their functions.
“It is a very expensive project. We have an almost 1:1 ratio within the homes...�
Indulge | November 2011 | 35
What is important for people to take away from this interview? Hilary: It is easy to make a difference in someone’s life. It doesn’t have to be big, just do something. Just use what is in your hand to make a difference. It may be small to you but when God breathes on it, it makes a difference in someone else’s life. Leigh: It looks easy to some on the outside, but it has its challenges; there have been days when I have just wanted to give up. Huge issues can make you feel like giving up, but you get a good nights sleep and a bit of perspective and you keep going. We sometimes pinch ourselves and think “Wow!” about how big this has all become. Us two little old grannies have done this!
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e k a m n a c u o How y . . . e c n e r e f f i d a
escue R e h S e port th treasure then p u s o t nts or d like l e l u a o t , t w e If you ur tim ebsite a re o w y e h t i m o w o Homes She Rescue H to find out m n o e rg go to th rescuehome.o rch Brisbane hu he www.s t Citipointe C ac or cont 888. 38 re go to uehome o t s 07 334 e n i l sc scue on estore/shere e R e h n t the S u/onli To visi pointe.com.a iti www.c
Indulge | November 2011 | 37
“Speak up for those who cannot sp
38 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
peak for themselves.� Proverbs 31:8
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The Power of One What can one person do to change the world? The problems are too big, the scope of the issues too wide and nobody’s going to listen to little old me! How can I help all the orphans in China? What can I do about Global Warming? Who would have a chance of impeding the drug trade? I don’t have the skills, the voice, the money, the faith, the chance, the time, the patience, the voice... The Bible is replete with examples of those who stood up when called upon and changed the course of history, inspiring stories that warm the cockles of your heart and amaze you with the faith shown and the steps walked. To name a few: Noah built a boat and saved the animals of the earth, as well as his family ensuring the future of mankind; Moses freed his people from Egypt, despite his reservations, and led the people to the promised land; Esther saved the Jewish race from destruction by her selfless actions and pleadings for her people; Nehemiah instigated the rebuilding of the Jerusalem walls and then the city regardless of the vocal opposition; John the Baptist made a way in the wilderness preparing hearts for the coming Messiah with no thought of promoting himself; Peter and Paul travelled the known world to bring the message of the Gospel to the masses, 40 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
perpetuating the Christian faith; and of course Jesus himself, died in our place to save all through his sinless sacrifice on the cross, changing forever the way we relate to God and each other. Ah, yes, I hear you say, but they were in the Bible and things have changed... they were great, and they heard from God more often and the Spirit was at work in them... Okay, well let’s look at mere mortal man throughout history where we can see without too much research, the effects of a single individual on the world and not always in a positive way. Christianity was a much persecuted faith and pretty much underground up until the fourth century when Constantine altered the status of the church to a favoured place in society; Socrates an ancient Greek philosopher was credited with laying the foundation for Western philosophy; Muhammad, founded the Islamic religion which many millions adhere to today; Martin Luther was a key figure in the development of Protestantism; William Shakespeare changed the face of writing and introduced hundreds of phrases into the English language, still used today; Sir Isaac Newton who was an extraordinary mathematician and scientist and gave us our understanding of gravity; Beethoven, who despite being deaf, was instrumental in giving us some of the most complex classical music we know; William Wilberforce who began the process to end slavery; Florence Nightingale who changed the face of modern nursing (thank goodness); Mother Teresa who selflessly left her wealthy background to tend to the sick and dying in the gutters of Calcutta; Adolf Hitler, though we may not like it, was hugely influential in bring about war in Europe and committing the heinous crime of the Holocaust; Nelson Mandela whose work against apartheid in South Africa is legendary.... I could go on for pages. I haven’t even mentioned Henry Dunant who began the YMCA and was instrumental in forming the Red Cross, or Jackie Pullinger whose tireless
work in Hong Kong did much to help drug addicts I want to finish with one of my favourite stories about making a difference by Loren Eisley. and rehabilitate gang members. I haven’t listed Charles Darwin the author of the Theory of The Evolution, taught as fact in many schools despite Starfish Story: the lack of proof or observation, or Fred Hollows, One day a man was walking an ophthalmologist who worked in Australia along the beach when he noticed a boy and overseas to restore eyesight for countless picking something up and gently throwing thousands of people. More than one million people it into the ocean. Approaching the boy, he in the world can see today because of initiatives asked, “What are you doing?” The youth replied, begun by this man. “Throwing starfish back into the ocean. The surf is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them back, If you have been reading Indulge since its debut they’ll die.” “Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize last December, you will know that we have there are miles and miles of beach and hundreds featured a plethora of stories about people who of starfish? You can’t make a difference!” After are changing the world, maybe not on the grand listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up scale of those mentioned above, but certainly in another starfish, and threw it back into the their little corner of the universe. They are putting surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said, themselves out there and making their individual “I made a difference for that lives available to the Lord for his purposes. This one.” very November issue highlights the work of Leigh and Hilary Ramsey and their work with young girls in Cambodia as well as Cathy Knechtli Make a difference this month and write and tell who has brought music to children in outback me what you did and what resulted. May God Queensland ... very different missions with bless you one hundred-fold for your sacrifice and varying scopes and reaches, but still important in obedience. You can make a difference... because the scheme of things and making a difference in there is Power in the One! the lives of those around them. So, what are you going to do? How can you make nicky.hurle@gmail.com a difference? What has God placed on your heart? Has anyone started that playgroup at church? Where in the community are they crying out for volunteers to hug babies at the hospital, take a reading group at the local primary school, donate Nicky is a talented and passionate educator who has clothes to a charity instead of selling them on taught in both Primary and eBay, answer phones at Lifeline, cook up some Secondary school in a career meals for the sick and infirm within the church that is a vocational calling. family or broader community, facilitate the She has a Biblical Diploma and a recently completed young people’s home group or help in the Sunday Masters in Gifted Education. School, make up some boxes for the Samaritans Her involvement with young Purse organisation this year for Christmas, replace people spans more than twenty all your light bulbs with energy efficient varieties, years in various roles including youth leader and mentor. compost the garden, sort the recycling, love your Nicky is currently a House Parent at the Australian Institute neighbour, family, friends and yourself. Listen to of Sport in Canberra where, with her husband David, she God’s still, small voice and go where he leads you, is responsible for looking after the welfare of residential make yourself available, follow your heart. athletes. She is presently writing her first novel and loves reading, movies and music.
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Developing Resilience in Children
Strategies to deal with Bullying
L
et’s start by looking at Bullying. What is bullying? Sharp and Smith (1994) wrote: “Bullying is a form of aggressive behaviour which is usually hurtful and deliberate; it is often persistent, sometimes continuing for weeks, months or even years and it is difficult for those being bullied to defend themselves. Underlying most bullying behaviour is an abuse of power and a desire to intimidate and dominate.” Rigby (1996) states that bullying contains seven key features: → An intention to be hurtful. → This intention is carried out → The behaviour harms the target → The bully overwhelms the target with his or her power. → There is often no justification for the action. → The behaviour repeats itself again and again. → The bully derives a sense of satisfaction from hurting the target.
Physical Bullying e.g. Fighting, kicking, punching, biting, shoving, pinching, abusive gestures and moving in close on one’s personal space. Verbal Bullying e.g. teasing, swearing, using putdowns, spreading nasty rumours and using standover tactics. Also repeated abusive phone calls, which are not only distressing for the individual but also for the whole family. Extortion – bullies blackmail and threaten. Visual e.g. insulting letters passed from student to student or a letter placed in the targets bag or locker. The use of emails in today’s IT world, as well as Texts, Facebook and Twitter are prime examples. Exclusion, Sexual Bullying, Racial Bullying and an interesting one called Victim Behaviour are all part of the Bullying Syndrome.
Enough of the negative – now let’s look at ways we can turn situations around and will help our Most of us have probably experienced some form children grow in their resilience and take control of bullying in our lives, particularly in our younger back of their circumstances. years. We could look through the following list and say “Yes, I experienced that, and that”. 42 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
STRATEGY 1 – FOGGING Fogging is a technique that may be used by a target when he or she is being teased or put down. The target responds to each taunt or name with a neutral statement – they just agree like they don’t care about what is being said. By thus responding the situation does not become inflamed. The bully soon becomes bored because the target is not reacting in the expected way. Here’s an example: Child 1: You look silly. Child 2: Maybe Child 1: Your haircut is so dumb. Child 2: You might think so. Child 1: I bet the butcher cut it, not the hairdresser. Child 2: Shrugs shoulders. Child 1: Anyway, your haircut makes you look like a three year old. Child 2: Possibly. Child 1: And if you think you’re going to be in our group, forget it. Child 2: So. STRATEGY 2 – ROBOT VOICE It can be difficult for a child (and also an adult) to confront a barrage of threatening statements. One way of staying in control of the situation is to remain in the “Neutral Zone” or continue repeating the same assertive statement until the bully is bored because he or she is not getting the desired response. Children usually understand that when a “Robot speaks”, the tone of the voice and words it uses remain unchanged; its language is unemotional and non-reacting. In this strategy for assertiveness the target responds by repeating the same “I” message with
the same tone of voice, words and body language. Here’s an example: Child 1: Give me your game. Child 2: No, I don’t lend this game. Child 1: Give me your game. I lent you my pens last week. Child 2: Thanks for your pens but I don’t lend this game. Child 1: Give me your game or else you’ll be sorry. Child 2: No, I don’t lend this game. Parents play a vital part in developing their children’s skills to deal with difficult situations. Talk to your children about any bullying incidents and practice role playing out these strategies with them. In coming issues, Barrie will look at topics such as Buddies, Bystanders, Saying ‘No’ like you mean it, Self-talk (My winning voice), as well as sharing scriptures that will help with developing resilience. Barrie Nicholson is the Deputy Head of Primary at King’s Christian College, Reedy Creek, Gold Coast. Barrie has been involved in education for almost 40 years, as well as pastoral care work for over 16 years. He is a father of four, and grandfather of six. He has a passion for helping children grow in resilience, especially when encountering situations where others might try to bully them, as well as working alongside parents in encouraging them to allow their children to accept responsibility for their own actions and to develop their social skills.
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Y R T N E FREE ASH ONLY
will be C Most stalls
Friday 18th November 6-9.30pm
W
here can you go to have a fair-trade chai tea with your friends, splurge on some African homewares and Indian jewellery, listen to live bands and at the same time help a woman from Bangladesh Chambers admin@globalmarketday.org feed and educate her family?
Hills Church
79 Queens Road, Everton Park
win maggie@globalmarketday.org Now in its fifth year, the Arana Hills based Global Market Day is an annual market that ket Day www.globalmarketday.org
emphasises fair trade, ethical practices and environmental sustainability. It offers a diverse collection of stalls; from clothes, shoes e a fair-trade chai tea with your friends, splurge on some African and bags to kids’ educational toys, ethnic wellery, listen tobeauty live bands and atsugar, the same homewares, products, rice, coffee time help a woman from and chocolate. cate her family? All profits from this market will be donated to Freeset; a fair-trade business providing employment and freedom for women trapped in the Global sex industry of Kolkata, rana Hills based Market DayIndia. is an annual market that
Event co-ordinator, Kate Chambers,sustainability. said ical practices and environmental It offers a diverse that while her team worked hard to make the othes,occasion shoesaand bags educational toys, ethnic homewares, fun night outto forkids’ the family, it was fun with a purpose. ‘It’s an All opportunity use this market will be donated to ar, coffee and chocolate. profits tofrom our consumer dollars to help aid the world’s ess providing employment and are freedom for women trapped in the sex poor,’ she said. ‘Our stall holders either fair trade certified or use fair trade practices in their businesses. Our aim is to run a local event that has a lasting global impact.’
Chambers, team Run bysaid Aranathat Hills while Churchher of Christ in worked hard to make the occasion partnership with the Hills Church, the twilight ily, it was fun with a purpose. ‘It’s an opportunity to use our consumer market has something for everyone. Foodies ld’s poor,’ she said. stall holders will appreciate fresh‘Our Spanish Tapas, while are either fair trade certified or coffee lovers should head straight to One their businesses. Our aim is to run a local event that has a lasting Coffee who are donating all profits on the night to Freeset. Everyone can get involved in the Bollywood Disco workshop from 7pm-8pm and local bands will provide live music during the evening the Chai Tent. with the Hills Church, Christ ininpartnership
h of the twilight market has For will moreappreciate information fresh go to Spanish Tapas, while coffee lovers Foodies www.globalmarketday.org ne Coffee who are donating all profits on the night to Freeset. 44 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au Photos courtesy of Josh Woning www.jhwoning.com d in the Bollywood Disco workshop from 7pm-8pm and local bands will
book
REVIEWS
by Michelle Dennis Evans
Outback from Baragula
Mary’s Guardian
Contemporary Inspirational Fiction www.mary-hawkins.com/
Historical Fiction www.carolpreston.com/
by Mary Hawkins
As the title suggests this novel is set in outback Australia, where the land is rugged and the properties are huge. Twins, John and Jillian have taken over the farm management. Jillian’s secret love interest, Steve, turns up when she least expects him. Jillian pushes away her feelings for Steve because she has reason to be concerned with the whereabouts of her brother. Jillian and Steve are forced to spend time together while they camp out on the property. After they find John, both Jillian and Steve are challenged by their dreams for the perfect partner while danger surrounds them. Outback from Baragula is the second book in the Baragula Trilogy, the first being Return to Baragula. This novel is filled with adventure, suspense and romance. The reader is taken on a journey of faith, pride and forgiveness. Reading this novel reminded me how easily young love can sway judgement, making it important to know and understand what is written in the Bible about being unequally yoked. Mary Hawkins is a highly acclaimed author with more than 800,000 books in print. For more information on the Baragula trilogy visit Mary’s website.
by Carol Preston
MARY’S GUARDIAN follows William and Mary, through the struggles and turmoil of life in early Australia. They are separated and jailed in England before travelling with the first fleet of convicts to Sydney Cove. When they arrive, they are reunited and work hard to find their place in this harsh new country. After Mary and William serve their time, they are rewarded with a patch of land to work for themselves. Mary and William’s struggles go beyond setting up house and a farm. Starting a family for them is anything but a natural progression, but their love holds strong through many losses and their faith helps them to continue pushing forward. The characters in ‘Mary’s Guardian’ have endless courage and strength. Carol Preston has thoroughly researched the convict years and used real characters to enhance her fictional story. From floods to droughts to fires, our beautiful country was settled by some mighty pioneers. With a touching end, this historical novel is well worth the read.
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46Photography: | www.indulgemagazine.com.au Tanya Epis Photography
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L
et’s continue our journey that we began in the October issue of Indulge to answer the question ‘Who really decides what’s beautiful?’
1980s – The Fitness Revolution Then the fitness craze of the 1980’s swept the West. Struggling to find bodies that might fit with their identities as liberated women, a generation was born obsessed with having ‘buns of steel’ and ‘rock-hard abs.’ This was the first time that big busts but small waists and hips were considered beautiful; a physiologically impossible feat. To overcome this anomaly, the plastic surgery industry grew to accommodate this new concept of beauty. 1990s – Weight-loss Industry Grows Body-building gave way to weight-losing with the rise of ‘heroin chic’, typified by model Kate Moss. The new ‘power’ women used to define themselves was the power to resist: the discipline to deprive oneself.
Who Decides What’s
Beautiful?
Part 2
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by Dr Cris Beer
2000 onwards – Where Are We Now?? One word to describe our current culture’s definition of beautiful is confused. With worth determined by weight, compulsively counting calories and kilograms, and deconstructing ourselves into imperfect parts. Where advancing age is not honoured but something to fear and avoid at all costs. How bizarre that we trumpet our gains in the professional and political sphere, while we secretly battle with imperfections and finding our true value. Although there are some organisations that are attempting to change our culture, one of which is Dove’s ‘Real Women’ campaign, the messages depicted by these organisations can only go so far. After all, Dove still tries to sell us anti-aging products! The reason for the lack of depth and real impact is due to a shaky foundation not based on absolute truth. But what is this basis of truth?
Back To the Beginning To determine truth we need to go back to the beginning, to God’s original plan for humanity. This was depicted in the Garden of Eden. As you may recall, Adam and Eve were in perfect unity with each other and God. They walked shamelessly, unafraid of their exposed nakedness. They were not self-conscious. But as you know, they sinned, and this is where our identity began to unravel. “Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realised they were naked” Genesis 3:7. Self-consciousness set in and they began to focus on their imperfections; in essence they created an idol of themselves. This is exactly what we still see outworking in our culture today. The Onslaught Begins This self-inflicted sense of shame is further inflamed by our enemy himself waging a war against our femininity. Satan holds a special hatred for women. This has roots also in the beginning of time, when Satan, previously known as Lucifer, fell from grace. His named originally meant Son of the Morning. He is said in Ezekiel to have been created as a stunning creature, a reflection of the Glory of God. But this was to his peril. Pride got the better of him and he wished to make himself the object of worship rather than God. Prior to Eve, Satan was the most beautiful creature ever to be created, that is, until we came along. He is thus intensely jealous of women because we now reflect the glory of God. Womanhood embodies the very beauty of God. This jealously had fuelled the onslaught and oppression of women throughout the ages, including in much of the beauty industry. Jesus Changed Everything So how do we break free of this mindset of our cultural norms? What truth do we establish in our hearts to guide us through the minefield that is our current unrealistic standard of beauty? Well, everything changed when Jesus came to Earth. His sole mission was to restore the conditions of the Garden of Eden. So now, in Him, we are eternally
perfected and perfectly accepted, just as we are. No amount of plucking, waxing, abdominal exercises, bleaching, or dieting can make us more acceptable or beautiful to Him. After-all we are supposed to be living for an audience of One. This is the essence of freedom from the struggle to be more beautiful, to focus on this truth. We no longer need to be self-conscious but God-conscious. When we truly see ourselves the way God sees us, we realise that we can accept ourselves just as he accepts us. We don’t need to strive for this unrealistic perfection any longer. Let’s learn to see ourselves as beautiful and valuable as we truly are. This takes practice. Rather than living in comparison, when we completely accept ourselves, we are able to see the same value and beauty in others. Although they may not realise it, we live in a world that needs to hear and see this truth. Let’s be the change we wish to see in this world. Let’s start defining beauty with God’s truth. After all, He is our Heavenly Dad who loves us, created us, and is forever captivated by our beauty.
! Cristina was born in Portugal to Portuguese parents and immigrated to Australia at the age of 5 years old. She has lived and studied for the most part on the Gold Coast. Cristina attained university degrees in Biomedical Science and Bachelor of Medicine/Bachelor of Surgery. She is also a qualified personal fitness trainer and nutritionist. “I have a special interest in holistic medicine, with a focus on natural and anti-aging medicine”. She is currently working in general practice on the Gold Coast. “I have a burning desire to see people live whole, healthy, and balanced lives in the fullness of God’s plan for them”.
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ya Love Tan
xx
Words: Charissa Steffens Photography: Tanya Epis Photography
Summer is on our doorstep and there are some great fashion finds outdoors at your local markets. Leave the mall behind and lazily explore the labyrinth of stalls that await your keen shopping eyes. The fresh air, live music and great coffee enhance your open-air experience. There are many unique pieces on offer for the savvy shopper with some exquisite handmade fashion accessories such as bags, shoes, belts and even some bling! A plethora of beautiful summer dresses abound in a mix of bold colours and soft florals. You can find some great beach outfits and fun Christmas presents for all ages as you meander amongst the vendors. The markets are full of raw talent as gifted people bring their passions direct to the public. You can find some stunning art and craft pieces, photography, and some beautiful homewares such as the cute candles pictured below. If you are a foodie then you will be in awe! There are fabulous homemade preserves, fresh fruit, baked goods and deli delights that will leave your mouth watering for more. So take the time this month, to head to your local markets and enjoy the pleasure of a little alfresco shopping. You will be delighted by what you will discover.
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Indulge | November 2011 | 51
5
Simple Strategies To Improve Your Health
I
’d like to share five simple strategies with you for shedding unnecessary weight to keep you feeling great. But first let me clear something up. Weight loss can be put into two categories. The first is a fully concentrated effort. This is where you dedicate yourself to counting every calorie and slaving away in the gym. The pounds come off, but once you relax the regimen your weight goes right back to where it was. The second is a combination of simple lifestyle changes. This is where you change a few key factors about what you eat and how you exercise, without making it a fulltime job. This type of weight loss is gradual and permanent, since you are able to maintain it long term. The five simple strategies below all fall into the lifestyle change category. These strategies may seem ridiculously simple, but do them over an extended period of time and you will see amazing, permanent results.
1
Ditch Your Diet Drinks Studies are coming out that link diet soft drinks to weight gain. Researchers from the University of Texas Health Science Center at San Antonio concluded that those who drank two or more diet soft drinks a day had the largest waistline increases—about five times more than that of non-drinkers. They stated, “Data from this and other prospective studies suggest that the promotion of diet drinks as healthy alternatives may be ill-advised: they may be free of calories,
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but not of consequences.” Bottom line: Artificial sweeteners are addictive, lead to waistline increases, and cause you to crave sugary foods. By cutting diet drinks out of your daily routine, and replacing it with water, you will lose inches and kilos—effortlessly.
2
Swap Sandwich Bread for Lettuce Move over bread, lettuce is better. It’s time to re-define your sandwich. While bread has tradition on its side, lettuce wraps offer you weight loss and increased energy. Bottom line: Eating bread and other starchy foods always leads to extra kilos, so change your ways. Swap your sandwich bread for lettuce for 30 days and see how much you will effortlessly lose. I bet you’ll feel more energetic after lunch too.
3
Trade Slow Cardio for Intense Intervals Doing slow cardio will not give you results. In order to really make your workout effective, you need to turn up the intensity. If you love the treadmill, then do a series of sprints throughout your workout. If you’re a swimmer, then push yourself extra hard every other lap. Bottom line: Doing slow, easy cardio will not give you the streamline body you want. Only intense intervals will do that for you. Pepper your workout with bouts of intense cardio and watch as the fat starts to disappear.
4
Avoid Sugar 99% Of The Time Sugar will cause you to gain weight every single time. There’s really no way around
that simple truth. If you’re serious about looking and feeling great, then understand that sugar has no place in your diet. Bottom line: If you avoid sugar 99% of the time, then you will be on your way to a lean and energetic body. If it’s your birthday or a special holiday, then partake in a small amount of sugar, but make that the exception and not the rule.
5
Exercise With A Professional When I design your workouts, you know it will be good. People who work with a personal trainer get better results than those who attempt to do it on their own. Each workout will push you to your limits, challenge your body and deliver the results you’re looking for. Bottom line: All of my clients expect to get the best workout of their lives each and every time they train with me, and I aim to over-deliver.
Kirsten is the owner of Brisbane based Personal Training and Lifestyle Coaching Business, Kirsten Cooke Fitness. With over fifteen years experience in the industry, Kirsten has developed an expert level of knowledge in the fields of Weight Loss, Stress Reduction, and Productivity. As a wife and mother of two beautiful (and full on) boys under 6, Kirsten understands first-hand how difficult it can be to find the time and motivation to exercise, eat well, and take care of yourself. Kirsten’s main focus in her business is to inspire people to get the most out of life, by helping them to make gradual and easy changes to their lifestyle. By empowering them with the necessary skills and knowledge to change their life, her clients are able to improve their health, vitality, self-esteem, energy levels and overall quality of life. Kirsten can be contacted on kirsten@ kirstencookefitness.com, or 0420 302 494.
Discover your unique personal style and express who you truly are, inside and out
Do you get dressed or stressed? Are you uncertain about some outfits you put together? Your Personal Style Formula will help you discover the real you that expresses who you are inside and out! Your Personality Style is the combination of many things !What you love to wear !The roles you play !The activities you are involved in !Knowing what works and what does not !What you are attracted to
Wear what you love and love what you wear! Go to www.styledge.com.au/ebook.html and grab your copy today for the introductory price of $23.00! Indulge | November 2011 | 53
Angela Frost Food Editor
Super Summer Salads ASIAN SLAW
Serves 6-8 people | Prep 15 minutes 1/2 Green cabbage - sliced thinly 1/4 Red cabbage- sliced thinly 2 carrots - grated 3 celery sticks- sliced thinly 3 spring onions- sliced thinly 1/2 cup salted peanuts - toasted - extra peanuts to garnish 54 | www.indulgemagazine.com.au
Combine all ingredients in a large salad bowl. Mix well. Pour over dressing when ready to serve and mix well. Garnish with extra peanuts.
Dressing
2 Tbsp peanut butter 1/2 cup vegetable oil 1/2 tsp sesame oil 4 tsp rice vinegar 3 tsp brown sugar 1 tbsp soy sauce Place all dressing ingredients in a jar, shake well.
NUTTY SWEET POTATO SALAD Serves 6-8 people | Prep 20 minutes Cook 15 minutes 3 Large sweet potatoes - peeled and cut into large pieces 3 Bacon rashers - chopped finely 1 small red onion - chopped finely 1 cup Macadian nuts - roughly chopped 1 1/2 cups Best Foods Real mayonnaise 1/4 cup flat leaf parsley - chopped finely 1/4 cup fresh chives - chopped finely 3 hard boiled eggs - chopped salt and pepper to taste 1. Heat a fry pan to medium and saute bacon and Onion till crispy. Add nuts, cook for 2-3 minutes. 2. Boil the sweet potatoes till cooked through but not mushy. Drain and place on a board to cool slightly. 3. While still warm place sweet potatoes in a large salad bowl add the bacon mixture, mayonnaise, parsley, chives and eggs. 4. Mix to combine, season. Chill till ready to serve.
BROWN RICE SALAD
Serves 8-10 | Prep 30 minutes
4 cups cooked brown rice - still hot 6 spring onions - thinly sliced 2 cups cashew nuts - roasted 1/2 cup fresh parsley - chopped thinly 1/2 cup sunflower kernels - roasted 2 cups currants Dressing 3/4 cup sunflower oil 1/2 cup soy sauce 2 tbsp lemon juice 2 garlic cloves- crushed 1. Place all the ingredients for your dressing into a jar and shake well. 2. Place warm rice into a large salad bowl and add the spring onions, cashews, parsely and sunflower kernels. Pour over dressing and mix well. 3. Place into the fridge till you are ready to serve. Indulge | November 2011 | 55