Imprint Chs literary magazine
Awareness Volume 2 2012 Photo by: Shane Bunnin
“Letter” From the Editors Creative Writing Class 2012
• •
“colorful yin-yang” By Breanna Wharram
I Taste the Rain
Consequences Rachel Chatwood Should I really be doing this? I just can’t imagine taking a life. Is it taking a life? I know there’s this big debate on whether getting an abortion is in fact taking a life and I don’t know if I can choose. Is it taking a life or-“Spencer Harper?” the nurse calls. “I’m here” I say getting up. I follow her to the room I’m going to be in. “So, here we are” the nurse says. “Put on this gown and the doctor will be in soon.” “Okay” I say. The nurse leaves and I begin to undress. I’m about to take off my jeans when it hits me. Do I really want to do this? Mom would not approve of this. There’s a knock at the door. I take the gown and quickly cover myself. “Yes.” The doctor opens the door. “Oh, I didn’t know you weren’t ready” he says. “I can come back in five minutes if you need more time.” “That would be fine” I say. After that doctor leaves, I go back to that night; the night I was raped. ************
“Spencer” my mom yelled. “Sam’s here.” “Okay mom, I’m coming” I say. I take one last look in the mirror and decide I’m happy with how I look. Downstairs, mom and Sam are in the kitchen talking about how their week has been. They have that type of relationship. I stand outside of the kitchen and give them another minute to talk and then I walk in. “Ready?” Sam asks me. “Yeah, ready” I say. I walk over to mom and give her a peck on the cheek. “We’ll be back by 11:30 and not a second later.” “You’d better be back by then” mom says. “Bye mom” I say as we walk out of the door. ************ When Sam and I arrive at the party, it’s already in full swing. The music’s so loud I can’t even hear what Sam’s saying and she’s right beside me. She grabs my hand and leads me to the back of the house. She peeks into three rooms before we find one that’s empty. “Okay” she says. “We meet by the front door at 11:00. We’re going to go get coffee afterwards. If the other isn’t there within two minutes, go looking for her.” “Got it” I say. “Let’s party.” Sam and I leave the room and go to the kitchen to get drinks. After that we go to the living room to dance. I’m having so much fun. Dancing with guys I’ve never even met before and experiencing it all with my best friend. I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around to see Sam and her boyfriend. “I’m going to hang out with Brian” she yells. “11:00. Front door. Don’t forget.” I nod my head and shoo her away so she can go hang out
with Brian. A few drinks later, I feel a bit woozy. I go outside for some fresh air. It helps a little. I walk around some and everything gets blurry. I make my way back to the house. The music makes my head hurt. I go to one of the rooms to sleep. I’ve all of a sudden become tired. I set the alarm on my phone for 10:55 and lay down on the bed. ************ I awake in the hospital. I look to my right and see a window. The sun is out. I look to my left and see my mom. “Mom?” I say. At the sound of my voice, her eyes fly open. She rushes over to me. “What is it baby?” she says. “What are we doing here?” I ask. “What happened?” “You…were” she says bursting into tears. “What is it mom?” I ask. “Do you remember anything from last night? At the party?” she asks “Um, I remember dancing and having a good time. A little drinking an--” “Drinking?!” mom exclaims. “How much did you drink?” “Four cups” I say not too happily. “Four?” she says. “We went over this Spencer. How many did we say was the limit?” “One-and-a-half” I drone. “Sorry.” “Do you remember anything after that?” she asks; her voice heavy with desperation. “Sam left to go hang out with her boyfriend and I kept dancing. I felt woozy and went outside to get some air. Everything got blurry, so I went back inside to lie down. That’s all I remember” I say.
“You don’t remember anything after that?” she asks. “No, my mind lapses and I wake up here. Why, should I remember anything?” I ask thinking of all of the things that could’ve happened, but not really knowing. Tears spring to her eyes again. “You were raped” she finally blurts out. I’m so shocked I can’t say anything. ************ I break out of my trance. Even though that horrible thing happened to me, I can’t bring myself to get the abortion. I redress and leave the doctors’ office. I walk around for a few hours trying to figure out how I’m going to break it to my mom. I come to the conclusion to just tell her. She was with me the night after that party where it all began; maybe she’ll be with me now.
Once You Hit Bottom, The Only Place To Go Is Up
“Yes” Michael Buell
Sense. No sense. White. Grey. A door without a frame. Infinite. Who can say what they don't know? Or know what they can't say? The moon cries from up above, The ocean from below. And still they do not know. Ever watching, ever present, ever there. Never there. The waves beat against the shore, Flaming tongues of broken dreams. Does it matter? Dimensions of another wish, The longing for what cannot be. Or see. To never know, to never need. Perhaps not. Maybe it could never be, lf already it was so. Or know. Do they know?
Infinite
By: Tyler Judkins
Nothing about anything, Something about everything. If beacons of hope are never to shine, Is yesterday the past or the future? To never know, to never dream. Nothing is the realm of time, But time itself is everything Or something. It is everything of nothing, The future of what cannot be. The past of yesterday is the future of tomorrow, Past, present, or future of time. The realm of dreams, Always but never to be. The realm of nothing, the realm of time. Sense. No sense. White. Grey. A door without a frame. Infinite.
cool-nest.com
Extreme Emotion & Awareness Photography Section Photo’s By: Karli Wood Samantha Mae
Perfect Circle
Temperamental
Panic
Awareness of Life
Melancholia
Serenity Ashley Vidal
Painted Joy: Samantha Mae
Sunflowers By Glynnis Everett
With the grace and beauty Of any ballet dancer The sunflower sways in the wind It lifts into the air Landing back on the ground With swirling colors of Black midnight To the bright, yellow sun The sunflower, once beautiful, and proud Lies in a crumbled heap Forgotten
Photo by Jim Mason at www.gpnc.org
Stage Fright It’s time, he thought. His hands were clammy, and beads of sweat were falling onto his prepped uniform. He heard the principal begin her speech. He flinched as he realized it was about him. Did she have to make him seem so dedicated? Did she have to go on about how serious he was about his schooling? So embarrassing…
“…And so here he is, the man himself, to give a few words.” The stage was empty now but for one lonely podium. He closed his eyes to try to calm down. Don’t think about anything, he thought. It is going to be fine. With slow steps, he walked up. As soon as he did, all eyes fell on him. He was watching the far corner of the room, keeping his sight to the corner for these few precious seconds he could, but already he could feel it. They were drilling into his every side, making the hair on his every inch of skin tingle. His shirt was getting sticky from the sweat. Could they see it? Don't touch it, don't touch it!
He was up there now, so he shouldn't avoid looking at them anymore. Yet the paper in his hands, containing the speech he had already memorized down to the last word, suddenly seemed to shine so brightly in his eyes. Is that why the principal had insisted he bring it? Did she know he was going to need an escape? He didn't know what to feel about that. He hadn't thought he'd been so obvious about his nervousness. Or maybe it wasn't just because he was nervous. Was there some sort of tell his body that let her know he would need it? No time to think. Gotta start now. “Good morning, student body of Hairbrush High School. First of all, let me thank you all for attending. I have...”
The words flew out of his mouth, his long week full of memorization and repetition taking over for his frozen mind. He couldn't even follow along with the words on paper, the letters looking jumbled and strange as if from another language. Ah, so it was useless after all... “Every lesson my teachers have given me has been useful, and given me the courage to keep moving forward...”
Gripping the sides of the podium, he let his gaze rise from the useless leaf of paper. He almost bit his tongue as he saw every student directly. Had there been so many before? It had looked like such a small crowd before, yet it seemed to stretch forever now. They were all looking at him, staring at him with various levels of attention. Were they jealous of his accomplishments? Were they wishing they had worked harder so they could be up here? Or were they bored? Were they just laughing at him behind those listless looks, amused at him for being the one fool to step up? He didn't know. He couldn't know. All he knew is that he wanted to run away, to hide from their unreadable eyes in some unknown corner of the world. But he couldn't. His knees were shaking too badly.
“One must have confidence in their work. That and determination. So long as you have those two things, you cannot fail...” Why had he agreed to this? Sure, it was a nice award, but was it worth the torment? He hadn't thought it would be so bad. In fact, he'd been excited over the chance to speak to everyone. He had gotten everything ready just for this event. The suit, the speech, the hair. Everything had been made and planned with perfect harmony. What an idiot I was, he thought. There is nothing good about being up here. I'd rather be down there!
“And one must always step forward and conquer our fears. Such is the meaning of success...” It was almost over, right? He thought suddenly. The line that he remembered being near the end of the speech had already been passed a while ago, so it had to be close to being over. The relief washed through him, removing his previous gloom. It was so strong that it even affected his rampant lips, making them curve into a smile even as he came upon the last line. “Once again, thank you, and have a great afternoon!” The customary clapping resounded, and he turned over the mike to the principal. There was still the ceremony of handing over the award, and a few minutes of the principal talking, but it didn't matter. He didn't have to say a word. He just had to stand there. He could, once again, be on the sidelines.
One� y Breanna Wharram
She Completes Me By: Garrett DeBusscherr
On top of a mountain, over looking the sea. Lies a great tower, for no one but me. Adorned with glass, decked out in stone. Lonely, a home to call my own. Up from the vale, came a beautiful maiden. With hair so fair, and flowers laden. Cold and lost, alone in this land. I took her right in, hand in hand. On top of a mountain, over looking the sea. Lies a great tower, for you and me.
Taken By: Homeaway.com
Walk Away By: Samantha Creech
Veins— blue-green burning through the flesh-painted so bright red with the heat boiling in that tortured soul. A wretched feeling in the twisted up fingertips as my fist feeds your face. No. Stop. And I breathe.
Photo By: sunshinebutterflygirl.blogspot.com
“Lost in legs” By Breanna Wharram
By: Mark Benitez Blackness. Flow through the nose, accept that filling feeling then reject. Empty yourself then forget for a split second… to repeat. It may seem easy enough but that nagging fact that you fail to remember means you need me. Now, I’m not a scientist to tell you your inner workings but I’m going to say you’ve just got to breathe more. Waking up in the morning, hopefully you’re already breathing. Soon you realize you are late. Don’t worry, get what you need and calmly head out. Show up to work and quickly redo whatever it is that you forgot at home. When it hits you that a project was due today… inhale… exhale. It’s all good. Not worth suBlackness. Flow through the nose, accept that filling feeling then reject. Empty yourself then forget for a split second… to repeat. It may seem easy enough but that nagging fact that you fail to remember means you need me. Now, I’m not a scientist to tell you your inner workings but I’m going to say you’ve just got to breathe more. Waking up in the morning, hopefully you’re already breathing. Soon you realize you are late. Don’t worry, get what you need and calmly head out. Show up to work and quickly redo whatever it is that you forgot at home. When it hits you that a project was due today… inhale… exhale. It’s all good. Not worth suffocating over anyway. Take it to your boss and explain your circumstance. Chances are if you deserve forgiveness you’ll get it. If you don’t then you won’t. It’s simply really. Stick it through the day and head home. Try not to let the stress get to you. People mess up, you’re not so different. Watch yourself if incase you black out. Driving and being blind aren’t necessarily recommended in society but hey that’s what happens when you’re red in the face all day and can’t relax huh? It’s a shame I know not much of what to say after you fail to accept my advice. You’re in the hospital for it with tubes in your body from every which way. Doctors ponder over your survival and how you may not make it through the night. Rest easy friend. Any stress you have won’t be expressed in movement or sound. It’s downright pointless to worry for the inevitable now. Just remember if they’re right, tomorrow will be a much better day than today. Let go… Breathe. ffocating over anyway. Take it to your boss and explain your circumstance. Chances are if you deserve forgiveness you’ll get it. If you don’t then you won’t. It’s simply really. Stick it through the day and head home. Try not to let the stress get to you. People mess up, you’re not so different. Watch yourself if incase you black out. Driving and being blind aren’t necessarily recommended in society but hey that’s what happens when you’re red in the face all day and can’t relax huh? It’s a shame I know not much of what to say after you fail to accept my advice. You’re in the hospital for it with tubes in your body from every which way. Doctors ponder over your survival and how you may not make it through the night. Rest easy friend. Any stress you have won’t be expressed in movement or sound. It’s downright pointless to worry for the inevitable now. Just remember if they’re right, tomorrow will be a much better day than today. Let go… Breathe.
New B.T.C single from Dj ReD and David Shurtleff Look What You’ve Done -Drake Remix (Dj ReD&David) Drake Ft. Lil Wayne “Look what you’ve done” Composer: Chase N. Cashe Album: “take care” Young money records Release date: November 15, 2011 CD
Fragile Hands By: Spring Bradley
I want to decorate, my wrists with searing scarlet ribbons— intertwining my veins. Trying. Failing. to drown out your cackles in liquid glitter, falling quietly from my Soul’s creaky windows, axe like words, greedily chipping away fragments of my heart, my body as still as Night’s prey my mind rapidly sweeping shards, of leftover peace into fragile hands.
Taken by: Austin Judkins
“Speak no, see no, hear no” By Breanna Wharram
By: Spring Bradley Tilt your head a little to the right, the photographer will coo. Comply like the happy girl you pretend to be, when all you really want to do is tilt your head a little to the left. Now smile. Show that lens you’re porcelain smile but not too much, it might crack. Perfect, simply perfect. Snap! Now Dad lets have you put your arms around everybody. Feel the sickening heat from your father’s palms, try not to squirm too much, knowing that he places those hands on a rainbow of women that aren’t labeled Wife. Say cheese! Snap! Let’s have the next one be with just Mom and Daughter. Sneak a peek at her, with your plain matching blouses. Does she look like she’s thirsting for only “one” glass of purple temptation? Now Daughter we’ll have you sit on the stool while Mom stands behind you, good. Now sweetheart look up at your Mom. Stifle those giggles from the irony of it all, you looking up to her? Pretend that those big stacks of paper on her desk mean less than you. Great. Snap! One more! Snap! Now Son and Dad we’re going to have you do the same pose. Watch your baby brother sigh, already bored with this game of Family, smiling quickly, ready to get back to his only friend-the controller. Hope that he will surpass Dad, and become an honest man. Smile boys. Snap! Okay I think that about raps it up. Find a comfortable spot, you’ll be waiting a long time. While your Parents pick out pictures that cover up those silent shadows. Quietly listen to the photographer say, you guys must be one happy family, perfectly aware of the people in those glossy rectangles.
“Emotional” By Breanna Wharram
Well that sucked”, I said returning home from a failed hunting trip outside the castle. “Aren is gonna be pissed” I lifted my head from string at the dark brown, well-traveled path to the horizon in front of me. The sun was just starting to set and was casting streaks of color in all directions into the sky. The castle was beautiful this time of day. Its silver colored walls reflecting the sunset like a beacon for weary travelers. I could just partially see the main wall when something whizzed past my head, cutting off a hair or two. I look on the ground to my left to find an arrow. Its dark brown, almost black shaft blended in perfectly with the path. Its green and black fletching instantly told me who it was. I crouched down and snuck my way to the side of the path. From this distance, I couldn’t see him. I had to get closer. I ran swiftly from tree to tree always looking for some glimpse of the archer that shot at me. I ran to the next closets tree and saw him. Well not exactly him, more like just a glimpse of color. I slung my hunting bow from my back, notched the arrow in place and watched. There it was again, the black movement on top of the wall. Just as soon as I was it, training took over and, in one motion; I aimed, drew back, and shot. The arrow was a blurry in the air. I heard a clink and a sudden gasp of panic. Clapping told me I hit my mark. “Nice shot Kelora!” The archer yelled. I stepped back on the path as the front gate opened and the archer stepped out. “Shoot at me again Aren and I won’t miss on purpose next time” “You sure that was on purpose?” “Wanna test me?” “Maybe later, right now my father wants you. Whatever you did, don’t even think about blaming me like you did last time” “Come on bro. That time with the bears and giants was totally your fault and we both know it” I quickly ran away in fear of what Aren would do to me if I stayed. Aren was my brother. Well not by blood. I have no family, I’m an orphan. Aren and his father take care of me. I’ve lived with them since I was about 6. That was 11 years ago. I ran to the castle at the top of the hill as fast as I could. Everyone knew who I was so nobody stopped me and asked what my business was. I ran through the giant halls that littered the inside of the castle. I always wondered why the hallways needed to be so large. I decided to walk quickly now, my legs were starting to burn. As I passed a guard I asked where my dad was. “In his trophy room” he said. “He’s always there” I said under my breath. I found the room faster than I anticipated. Opening the door I found Dad staring face to face with a 7 foot tall creature with foot long claws on both hands, matted fur all over its body and a snout like a dog but with teeth the size of small dogs. “Remembering the Chad incident again?” I asked. This monstrous beast with a simple name invaded the castle a few years ago. Dad killed it just before it gutted me while sleeping. For them to be so big, Chads are quite stealthy creatures. “That was a scary night Kelora. You almost died.”
“Freedom’s Lost Love” By: Sierra Heath
Transparency Between the Lines By: Jason Tran Every day is the same hour by hour day by day a monotonous cycle of life. Avoiding any interactions portraying the avoided child in a crowded campus pondering empty thoughts. Yet as a door opens to a familiar haven all havoc breaks loose as one’s emotions come true. Laugh upon laugh the world is not a bother enjoying his surroundings in a hidden paradise.
Two sides for one face rather than mortify himself he transfigures in lonesome times.
Taken By: Shane Bunnin
Even Flowers are Insecure
By: Karli Wood
The yellow flower It feels so plain and ugly With the red flower
Photo by: Phoebe McEvoy
The Fight By: Keano Vang
Photo Credit: Google
“Hey, you there!” Though that also brought the question, what was he going to get for dinner? From what he understood, you could get food from the cafeteria at any time, due to how the schedules for some of the Regulators worked. Even if he was just doing General Studies, he shouldn't be denied. “Hey, I'm talking to you!!” What was he going to get though? He hadn't gotten anything after the juice, and by dinner time, he would no doubt be starving. They served a whole lot of foods, so maybe they would serve something from his country. It was certainly possible. He could always go for a pizza... “HEY YOU WITH THE HOOD, STOP IGNORING ME !!!” Finally acknowledging the voice, Hajime left behind his halfformed thoughts of gooey cheese and numerous toppings to look up. Before him stood an absolutely enormous guy. His bulging arms were covered in tattoos, and his blonde hair was cut short, army style. There were two or three guys behind him that looked almost exactly the same as him, down to the pissed off look on their faces. They reminded him of a pack of wild dogs. “Yes, can I help you?” His words seemed to set them off further, especially the one in the middle. He looked like he was going to burst a blood vessel or something. “Haa...” the middle one let out his breath, looking as he was trying to calm down. “You're quite the annoying little bastard aren't you?” His voice had a strange accent to it. It sounded harsh and guttural, as if he was chewing on the words before spitting them out. “First you reject my girlfriend's offer, then you ignore me, then you act as if you've done nothing wrong. You really need to be taught a lesson, du hurensohn.” Hajime raised an eyebrow at the last words, remembering having heard them from a certain swearing exchange student he met once. 'German, huh? And did he say girlfriend? I haven't said anything to any girl...' A face flashed through his mind, almost making him slap his forehead. 'That wannabe reporter is HIS girlfriend? Ah man, I can never get a break, can I?' “Look buddy, I don't want any trouble here. I just- urgh” Before he could do anything the giant German grabbed him by the throat, lifting him in the air with the greatest of ease.
“No, you look here, buddy,” the giant said, squeezing once to get his point across. “My name is Alex Bernhard. I am one of the strongest students here. A Regulator, ya see? My ability allows me to strengthen myself to the point of being able to bend steel girders as if they were paper. Doing something like this is beyond easy.” Abruptly, he snapped himself around, throwing Hajime over to the cafeteria behind him. He landed heavily atop of one of the outside tables, drawing the attention of all the students still out and about. “Do you understand, du horst?” said Alex as he approached, his arms glowing dangerously. “You messed with the wrong people, and now you're gonna pay. Try not to move too much, and you may just come out halfway alive.” As he reached the table, he raised his arms up and smashed down. Hajime barely managed to roll off the table before the entire thing exploded in a shower of wood and metal. “It seems you didn't hear me. Do you want to die that badly?” said the larger guy, looking angrily at the smaller Japanese boy. “So...” Hajime stood up again, making sure that his hood was still on. “There is no chance we can talk this out then?” The German giant only laughed, swinging his fist like a huge hammer. This time though, Hajime was ready, and easily jumped back before the blow reached him. “There wasn't a thing to talk about in the first place!!!” roared Alex, taking two enormous steps forward while thrusting his fist out. Hajime didn't try to jump backwards again and instead took a step forward. The move looked suicidal from others' point of view, until he effortlessly moved the giant's arm to the side, causing the bigger boy to stumble. “Wha-?” He whirred around, swinging his fist as he did, but Hajime only ducked under the blow. Alex looked down at his opponent in confusion, and soon noticed something different. His face was stupefied at first, but soon a smile crept up, followed by a loud laugh as the situation became too much for him. “Y-You're.... haahaha... going to use martial arts against me...? Hahaha!! That's too funny boy!!” The other students mentally agreed with the powerhouse, all of them looking at the stance that Hajime had taken after the first few moves. How could simple karate or whatever that was help him against a Regulator? “Why don't you try me then?” said Hajime quietly, beckoning Alex with the 'come hither' motion. “Gladly,” the giant of a man said, already stomping towards him with his fists ready. He unleashed a deadly barrage, punching down at the smaller boy almost like a professional boxer. His fist almost blurred with their speed, and some people could even feel the air generated by the movement. Alex wasn't holding anything back. He was out for blood now.
But just as amazingly, Hajime was easily keeping up, moving away from what he couldn't handle like a quick rodent while redirecting the weaker moves in ways that sought to embarrass the larger boy. The hits got faster, causing him to have to retreat more often, but otherwise it looked like as if he was playing with the German boy. “YOU LITTLE PUNK, STAY STILL!!!” “No thank you.” Soon however, Hajime's foot touched the metal of another bench, and he found himself unable to retreat. As his body stiffened in surprise, Alex just gave a feral grin. “I'VE GOT YOU!!” he roared, raising his arms to deliver a double handed hammer blow. Even if Hajime tried to avoid it, he would still be crushed. Farther away, a certain pony-tailed girl was panicking, never having suspected her boyfriend would take things so far. Some students looked away, while others were in the middle of shouting at the German boy to stop. Everyone was going nuts, but instead of looking scared like the rest, the smaller Japanese boy instead looked disgusted. “Too reckless.” Hajime rushed to the giant German before he could finish raising his hands and jumped up. His feet touched the bigger boy's chest for a moment before he somehow pushed himself further up, almost seeming to run up Alex like as if running up a wall like some sort of demented lizard. Before anything could be done, and in the space of a quarter of a second, the bottom of his palm met his opponents jaw with such strength that everyone could hear Alex's teeth crack. “You left yourself open.”
The larger boy's face could not be seen for a second, the blow having made his head snap back. But as Hajime landed on the ground once more, Alex's body fell to the ground like a large oak tree. One look was enough to confirm it; he was out cold. All was quiet for a second. Hajime was breathing a little harder than usual, but not so much so that he seemed completely exhausted. Nobody moved. Then, in the absolute silence that was seriously beginning to creep Hajime out, someone dropped a can of soda. As the liquid splashed the ground, everyone began talking. “...Amazing...” “How did he do that...” “Is he really not a Regulator?” “That's impossible!!...” “Wait, look! Look at his face!” Hajime widened his eyes and reached up. But it was too late. Somehow, when he had landed, his hood had fallen off. Everyone could see his face now. Everyone could see his eyes, his hair, and most importantly... Everyone could see his scar. “Well... Dang.” Photo Credits: Mark Prescott: prescottmark. wordpress.com
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