How to help the Family of a Terminal Patient It’s inevitable as a nurse to experience the loss of a patient. If the patient has been cared for by you, the chances are you have become familiar with not only the patient, but the family as well. From the moment a family and patient are informed that the patient is terminal, you become not only the nurse, but a support system for all involved. The doctor provides the pertinent information to the family and patient, and then you are there for follow up questions, and to see the patient and family through this difficult time. Allowing Open Discussion For many patients, it is important for them to discuss their wishes for their loved ones, for after their passing. For the family members this can be extremely difficult, and a natural reaction to prefer avoiding discussing the terminal diagnosis. It's understandable from both sides, so if appropriate, suggest a compromise. The family does not want to dwell on the inevitable; however the patient needs to express their wishes. A workable solution could be to allow the patient a certain amount of time, an hour for example, to express their wishes upon their death. After that time is up, close the subject until another designated time to discuss it, if needed. Talking about the future continuously does not provide peace of mind to anyone involved; however, it is only right that the patient make their wishes known, a compromise of time may be the best solution. Related: Healthy Cafeteria Alternatives to Consider Family Interaction When they first learn that a family member is facing a terminal diagnosis, most families will typically come together and rally their resources in order to assist the ill family member. This is commonly referred to as the “unity” stage of the new grief. At this point, other priorities are often pushed aside and old grievances are put on hold as the family comes together. One or more family members may emerge as primary caregivers, while others may take on other responsibilities that were once carried by the patient. Former family roles are often re-created and issues that may have been buried long ago begin to rear their heads again. For example, people find themselves falling back into old family roles, such as mediator or problem solver, that they wouldn’t choose now or had thought they’d shed long ago. This can not only take a toll on family members involved, it can be very difficult for the patient. As an advocate for the patient, it is appropriate that you speak up and offer suggestions.
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