Incite Magazine - March 2007

incite

09 | 05 march 2 0 0 7

The F-Word Planet Bollywood Lavalife Adventures

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Correction

The City of Hamilton accepts plastics number 1, 2, 5, and 6 for recycling. Incorrect information was published in our February issue.

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I

EDITORIAL

have a lot of sympathy for evangelical Christian fundamentalists. While I’m not exactly a fan of proselytizing about Jesus to non–Christians, promoting creationism, and writing things like “God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve” on church–front signs, I can’t help but feel a common bond between us. When I come across pamphlets saying The Gay Agenda: It’s Dividing the Family, the Church and a Nation or The Lie: Evolution my feelings of irritation are coloured by a benign and bizarre sense of comradery. This sympathy may come as a surprise for some, considering my atheist, pro–choice, queer–positive, extremely liberal leanings. But there it is: my heart goes out to a movement of absolutism and judgment.

You see, I’m a vegetarian—perhaps even an evangelical vegetarian fundamentalist. I understand the drive to preach and cajole, to debate and bemoan. There are a multiplicity of reasons for people to choose vegetarianism, many of which embrace the kind of non–judgmental, to–each–their–own, moderate stance I tend to support in other matters of personal choice. Unfortunately, on this subject I’m a hardliner. I’m not in it for health reasons or because I think meat is too chewy. I’m not even

in it because of the high toll that meat production takes on the environment.

My vegetarianism is an ethical stance: I believe that eating animals is wrong.

And it’s not just wrong for me—I believe it’s wrong for you, too.

I wish I could cite the cruel or unsustainable practices of factory farming as the reason behind my vegetarianism, but at the heart of the matter is something less tangible and a little closer to faith than I tend to feel comfortable admitting. Ultimately, I just don’t think animals are ours to use.

Like Christian fundamentalists who believe in the eternality of each soul, I think that animal rights are universal and that a cow here has the same worth as a cow in Nigeria—a worth independent of how it is perceived and valued by the humans around it. Granted, I’m not crossing oceans to proselytize and try to temper my enthusiasm with a reminder of the privilege in being able to say no to certain foods while millions go hungry. For this reason, I accept some room for cultural relativism within vegetarianism, on the level that it isn’t feasible for many at this time. Additionally, I have serious doubts that any form of top–down value–production will ever be a good idea, be it women’s liberation, finding Jesus, or freeing chickens. Ethical changes that demand drastic altera-

Editing and Production Co–ordinator

Kerry Scott Editors

Samantha Green Rob Lederer

Kate MacKeracher Jacob Stewart–Ornstein Layout Co-co–ordinators

Sylvia Andreae Ana Nikolic

tion of societal norms tend to work only when the impetus for change comes from within.

But in North America today, I am part of the “within”—and I’m hoping for change. Joining this movement has opened my eyes to the subtleties and challenges of being considered a radical in a fringe my otherwise mainstream life has not forced me to navigate. Perhaps that’s why when I’m not munching salad with my vegetarian pals I have an eye out for my other comrades—those incorrigible evangelists.

The Christian fundamentalists know the tension between hoping to teach by example and feeling compelled to speak up. We both have networks of support, collections of testimonials, and pamphlets galore. If a friend mentions that she is curious about my cause, I’ll point her to the Meet your Meat and Peaceable Kingdome DVDs with almost the same eagerness I imagine fundamentalists feel about the potential to save a non– believer’s eternal soul. You’ll have as much luck convincing a pro–lifer that abortion’s okay because they don’t have to do it as you will convincing me to stop fighting for animal rights because I don’t have to eat steak.

The Christian fundamentalists and I know what it’s like to be stereotyped, tokenized, and ridiculed—and we

incite

8 Move Over Joan Rivers 10 The F–Word 14 Planet Bollywood 18 Mac’s Little Brother 19 Power to the People Issue 20 A Non–lethal – 24 Through the Fiberglass 26 Living La Vida Lava Celebrity blogs

Modern feminism

A whole other world

Money can’t buy happiness. But it can buy marshmallows, which are kinda the same thing.

Wandering through Mohawk Engineers Without Borders

Printing

Hamilton Web Printing

Are non lethal weapons the lesser evil?

Impact Youth Publications 97 Sterling Hamilton, ON L8S 4J3 incite@mcmaster.ca http://www.incitemagazine.ca Incite is published six times per academic year by Impact Youth Publications. 10,000 copies are distributed in the McMaster University–Westdale area. Entire contents copyright 2006–2007 Impact Youth Publications. Letters up to 300 words may be sent to the above address; they may be edited for length and clarity and will not be printed unless a name, address, and daytime phone are provided.

Opinions expressed are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect the views of Incite’s staff or Impact Youth Publications.

INSIDE FEATURES

Graphics Co–ordinator

Erin Giroux Graphics

Boram Ham Gilberto Lontro

Michelle Ren Contributors

Muneeb Ansari Leila Beheshti

Maya Borooah Andrew Carreiro

Alanna Courtright Erin Dunham

Patrick Egit Chris Evans

Zsuzsi Fodor Ben Freeman

Katie Huth Scott Lemoine

Ana Nikolic Manisha Phadnis

Shobit Shanker Anna Strathy

Siva Vijenthira Vanessa Wynn–Williams

know that these things don’t make us stop. And there’s another similarity: When you sit down with me for a conversation on vegetarianism, I’m not actually there to neutrally evaluate my beliefs and consider adopting yours anymore than an evangelist is there to consider switching Jesus for Mohammed—I’m there to convert.

Seeing elements of myself in a group with which I take great issue has forced me to do a lot of thinking. I used to carefully distance myself from the PETA crowd, agreeing with those who said the group sometimes takes things too far. I used to rely on statistics about water use and waste production on factory farms to back up my vegetarianism, leaving the more philosophical and ethical discussions aside. But—I never thought I’d say this—the fundamentalists have given me a new perspective. Reason, touted as the solution to all our troubles, has let me down.

Just as I can’t be debated into believing in the Bible, I’ll never be able to use reason alone to convince someone that animals are entitled to the right to life. I’ve decided to embrace my moral convictions for what they are: a belief system made rational to me by something as awkward and touchy–feely as the hunch that cows just matter—a hunch you could call faith.

A day in Second Life

Adventures on Lavalife

Cover by Gilberto Lontro

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DEPARTMENTS Happenings: News from Near and Far Letter From Belgium Column: Digitize me, Captain Column: Pop

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Happenings

MINUTES FROM LAST MONTH selected news from near and far Cluck

True Love

Mmm Caffeine

Ignatieff: Short and not–so– sweet Michael Ignatieff, “renowned human rights scholar” and the Deputy Leader of the Liberal Party of Canada, came down to the Hammer on 2 March to give a pithy and formulaic speech at the second annual Global Citizenship Conference. As the sparse, disinterested crowd was told that there is a need for global change and youth can make a difference, many found more food for thought in a list of quotations handed out before the lecture by the Hamilton Coalition to Stop the War. Evidently, Ignatieff wrote in the New York Times that, “To defeat evil, we may have to traffic in evils: indefinite detention of suspects, coercive interrogations, targeted assassination, even pre-emptive war.” His newly Liberalized response to a question about Bill C-36 contradicted his earlier beliefs in an almost laughable way. Even the inspirational speech itself was quashed when a second-year student asked why youth are always expected to make the changes the world desperately needs. Why, she asked, doesn’t Ignatieff’s generation do something? He smiled and related a fascinating story about how Angola’s corrupt government spends its money. Give the man a hand: he is

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definitely a politician.

More than you can shake a diploma at A total of 5100 McMaster students are graduating in this year’s Spring Convocation ceremonies, the largest number in the history of the university. Normally there are eight graduation ceremonies but a ninth has had to be added and the schedule rearranged so that Hamilton Place can accommodate the unprecedented number of students and guests. Next spring, the total number of ceremonies will be increased to ten. The historic occasion is also marked by the official registration and recording of McMaster’s 77-year-old coat of arms with the Canadian Heraldic Authority. It features the well-known eagle and cross, with the Greek motto ΤΑ ΠΑΝΤΑ ΕΝΧΡΙΣΩΙ ΣΥΝΕΣΤΗΚΕΝ, meaning “In Christ all things cohere.”

Busted The number of Mac students caught for academic dishonesty skyrocketed over the past year, from 261 go 362— an increase attributed not to an entering class of exceptionally clumsy plagiarizers but rather to the heightened

inside the bubble

vigilance of McMaster’s professors.

In September, professors of first year engineering courses were educated about the need to report all cases of academic dishonesty, resulting in one eagle-eyed professor reporting over 70 students. Overall, first year students were most often caught, and the most common offence was plagiarism, with 139 cases, followed by improper collaboration, with 127.

Other actions considered academically dishonest include cheating on a test, aiding another student, altering a grade, making multiple submissions of the same paper, and giving a false medical excuse.

General science breaks it down In September 2008, McMaster’s general science programme will be replaced by three new programmes: Environmental and Earth Sciences, Life Sciences and Physical Sciences. There will be different entrance requirements for each, and certain courses will only be open to students registered in a specific programme. Several new specializations have also been added to various faculties, and the Faculty of Science will begin offering a Bachelor of Science Kinesiology, with the flashy acronym B.Sc.K., to parallel the Bachelor of Kinesiology already in place in

the Faculty of Social Sciences.

Accidental Propaganda McMaster’s club Solidarity for Palestinian Human Rights (SPHR) has issued an apology for a film screened at its 15 February 2007 event “Palestine, Israel: Roots of Conflict, Prospects for Peace”. The event featured Dr. Norman Finkelstein, a controversial Jewish American scholar, as keynote speaker, as well as a video created by the Middle East Media Research Institute (MEMRI); much to the dismay of organizers, the un-previewed MEMRI film portrayed Dr. Finkelstein as a Holocaust-denier. Although Finkelstein had space during his talk to counter these allegations, SPHR still felt a need to clarify by email that the video is a product of a “Zionist propagandist agency” desiring to “defame and misrepresent supporters of the Palestinian people.” Finkelstein’s own website gives the full transcript of the interview MEMRI used to lend credence to its insinuations, including the passages strategically cropped from the video. For more information on Finkelstein’s objections to MEMRI, see http://www.normanfinkelstein.com/.

Compiled by Siva Vijenthira

in canada...

Smoking Ship CHATHAM—Several hundred tobacco farmers drove down Queensway West in a convoy of 50 tractors on 8 March 2007, shutting the busy road for some hours. They claim that tobacco farming in Ontario is no longer viable thanks to government policies against smoking and the increasing use of imported leaf, and are demanding a billion dollar buyout from the province to subsidize a switch–over to other crops. “I am nervous, anxious, and afraid of the unknown,” grower Linda Mels told the crowd.

Rapidly switching to the metaphorical she went on to claim that tobacco farmers “are all in the same boat and it is sinking.”

Irish Man Gets Drunk!

WINNIPEG—An Irishman, who forced a cross–Atlantic flight to make an unscheduled landing in Winnipeg, was fined $17,000 and may even lose his job. Though originally scheduled to land in Phoenix, Arizona, the flight was diverted after the passenger, vis-

SF ♥’s S&M SAN FRANCISCO—Kink.com, a studio that makes S&M movies to distribute on the internet, recently bought the historic State Armory in San Francisco’s Mission District. This acquisition has opened a public debate about decency in a city renowned for its sexual tolerance. Kink bought the Armoury—erected in 1912, empty since 1970, and added to the National Register of Historic Places in 1978—after low–income housing advocates dismissed proposals to develop the building into offices or apartments. Mayor Gavin Newsom—who is caught up in his own sex scandal, admitting he had an affair with the wife of his campaign manager—is concerned about people being spanked, tied up, and poked with mechanical implements in close proximity to schools, and is organizing a public hearing on Kink’s plans. With one sex scandal under his belt, he seems to be trying to avoid another.

Boozehound Service SWEDEN—What do border agents do with all that alcohol they confiscate at airports and borders? It’s one of the mysteries of the universe, right up there with how they get the caramel into the Caramilk bar. Most countries simply throw it out. The Swedes do

ibly drunk, began swearing at flight attendants, slapped a fellow passenger in the face and even threatened to kill the passenger’s wife. The traveller had apparently consumed four quarts of wine and a Valium while on board in a bid to calm his nerves and overcome his fear of flying. Finally handcuffed to his seat, the passenger was arrested by police upon landing in Winnipeg. There was one bright spot for the man, however, as members of Winnipeg’s Irish Association offered him accommodations while he dealt with court proceedings. And finally, in a blow to overcoming Irish stereotypes everywhere, he told the arresting officers “What can me say boys, I f***ed up.”

“Soldier” Teddy Bears THE MARITIMES—Some Irving gas stations in New Brunswick and Nova Scotia are selling teddy bears dressed in camouflage clothing and with the word “soldier” written across their chests. Proceeds from their sale are going to military family support groups, but not everyone approves of

the message the bears are sending.

The Fredericton, N.B. Peace Coalition sees teddy bears as children’s toys that give comfort that should not be clothed in combat uniforms. But the creator of the “soldier” bears, an ex– soldier himself, claims to have “overwhelming” support from the community and to have received orders for thousands of bears. In the future, he might also look for support from the influential children’s “nagging” lobby, by adding colour–changing camouflage fur and a working stun–gun.

Roll up the Rim Efficiently NATIONAL—Every year, the Tim Hortons “Roll Up The Rim” contest brings out the obsessive compulsive “rollers” lurking in many Canadians.

Unfortunately, the rims of coffee cups are not marvels of engineering. Oftentimes, the frustration far outweighs the benefit of winning a free muffin.

Thankfully, a very ingenious Canadian has created a tool that will forever change the lives of loyal Tim Hortons customers. Called the “Rimroller”, it is a small device with a minute blade

to make rolling up the rim easier. Paul Kind dedicated three years of his life to developing the Rimroller. Now if only people could put such dedication to something else… developing recyclable coffee cups perhaps?

Stocks, bonds, and babysitters MONTREAL—Why shouldn’t the people you trust to manage the intricacies of your personal finances also manage the more quotidian matters of your life? The Bank of Montreal’s new “enCircle EXEC” initiative proposes to combine financial management and “concierge and lifestyle” services for elite executives and business owners. If the hassles of snivelling children, dirty laundry (literal or figurative), and $500 000 in investable assets have surpassed the organizational capacity of your Blackberry, this may be the service for you.

Who says money can’t buy you love?

These days you can get relationship advice at the bank counter.

Compiled by Ben Freeman, Sam Green, and Kate MacKeracher

...and around the world not. After all, why throw out perfectly good EtOH? Booze confiscated in Sweden is all sent to the central location of Linkoping, where it is magically turned into fuel. The resulting fuel is used to fuel city buses.

zerland—which is the last remaining Western European country to enforce mandatory conscription—and Liechtenstein—which has a population of 34,000 and no standing army—into sharp relief.

Poultry Power

Shinbone–cross’d Lovers

SWEDEN, AGAIN—In another outstanding example of groundbreaking energy sources, the Swedish power company Umea power has teamed up with Sweden’s egg industry, planning to use chicken carcasses to generate energy. They will burn 9000 chickens in a power plant near Uvea. When it was suggested to them to try using other animals as well, they said it would be more difficult. Apparently chickens are just the right size.

ROME—Not far from fair Verona, at a construction site outside Mantua, Italy, archaeologists have unearthed a scene destined to touch the hearts of starry–eyed forensic scientists and morbid lyric poets everywhere: a male and a female skeleton from the Late Neolithic period (5000–6000 years ago) entwined in an ancient embrace.

The grave of this young—as archaeologists conjecture from their unusually plentiful teeth—couple was uncovered in an area with many villages and (single) burial sites from the Neolithic era. Archaeologists cast a faint pall on popular speculation about primordial passion, alluding to the occasional Neolithic practice of sacrificing a wife when her husband died. Then again, such an end would have certain parallels with Shakespeare’s tale of angsty Veronan teenaged love.

The Swiss Invasion LIECHTENSTEIN—The formidable Swiss army invaded neighbouring Liechtenstein on 3 March 2007. One– hundred–and–seventy fully armed Swiss soldiers crossed the boarder during night manoeuvres, only to retreat as dawn revealed their transgression. Switzerland was quick to disclaim any aggressive intentions and Liechtenstein played down the possibility of diplomatic repercussions.

This incident did, however, throw the relative military strengths of Swit-

Family Fission CHICAGO—A room of wall–sized television screens allows Millie of Ray Bradbury’s classic Fahrenheit

451 to spend more time interacting with (virtual) acquaintances than with her physically–present husband, and an international consulting firm is promising to take the fiction out of this science fiction technology. Accenture has developed a technology prototype it is calling “The Virtual Family Dinner”, consisting of a four– by–six–foot flat–screen television and two cameras trained on your dinner table. The idea is to reunite far–flung families for a little olde tyme bonding at meals, particularly so concerned relatives can monitor the health and well–being of isolated seniors. Designed for non–technical users, the prototype’s software analyses images from the cameras, automatically running through and linking to a list of contacts when the resident is detected putting food on the table; Dadong Wan, Accenture’s senior researcher for the project, observes, “Grandma doesn’t have to do anything.” Although users may switch off The Virtual Family Dinner if they are not in the mood for dinnertime voyeurs, one wonders how comfortable the technology’s less–than–tech–savvy target audience will be with the on/off controls. In retrospect, this suppertime spyware conjures up Big–Brotherly images of another sci–fi classic altogether.

Compiled by Jacob Stewart-Ornstein and Ana Nikolic

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LETTER FROM

Letter From...

Hallo, Generally, the decision to spend a year of one’s university studies abroad somewhere is not made lightly. Or if it is, then perhaps the particular country or city of destination is given a good deal of consideration. I might modestly hazard the suggestion that amidst the panoply of factors and concerns that influence the decision, one is, on the whole, anxious to avoid things like revolution. At the very least, I thought that I was avoiding such things in coming to Belgium.

“Stop the presses!” I hear you exclaiming, an ocean away. But I will assuage your fears before delving into the matter much further; the revolution lasted only about half–an–hour on a Wednesday evening in December, after which time the television station that had been broadcasting grainy images of the Belgian royal family boarding an aircraft and leaving the country flashed the message “This Is Fiction” across the bottom of the screen.

(The station had hoped to provoke discussion about Belgian national identity by staging a mock revolution by the radical Flemish separatist party.)

Perhaps it is not such a funny fiction (by all accounts many Belgian politicians, embassy staff, and journalists were not exactly laughing as they reached for their cellphones and computers in frantic search of confirmation of the story) but it highlights some of the important difficulties that Belgium faces today. These difficulties might be described as growing pains. Despite this entire region’s rich and complex history, Belgium only gained official independence in 1830 (having been a part of Spain, the Austrian Habsburgs, France, and the Netherlands). But to a country that has been devastated twice over in the world wars of the past century, the elation and promise of independence must be tempered today by a certain degree of aged world–weariness.

I arrived in Belgium in September of 2006, completing my first ever trip in an airplane (lame, I know, but I was terribly excited) with a landing at Brussels International Airport. Catching a train to nearby Leuven, a medieval town of about 90,000 people where the Katholieke Universiteit Leuven (founded in 1425!) makes its home, I set about trying to find a home for the year—an intimidating prospect when one has never done such things before and can’t speak the local first language.

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Belgium

Now if you know only a little about Belgium, you likely have the impression that I should be able to get by speaking French. Perhaps if I had stayed in Brussels or caught a different train from the airport that morning this would have been the case.

And so the complexities of Belgium that have so shaped my time spent here begin to reveal themselves.

This country, one 330th the size of Canada, is home to some 10 million people and is probably best known for its capital. Brussels is home to the Belgian royal family, the national parliament, and, more internationally recognizable, NATO and the EU. This is only one small part of the picture, however.

Depending on where one travels in Belgium, one may encounter people who speak, as their first language, either Flemish (approximately Dutch), French, or German. The German–speaking part of the country is relatively small. For political purposes, Belgium is divided into three regions, each of which has its own government; the German–speaking area is not one of the three!

Roughly, the northern half of the country is Flemish–speaking Flanders, including such renowned destinations as Antwerp (home of Flemish Master Pieter Paul Rubens and the global diamond trade) and Bruges (often referred to as the Venice–of–the–North). The southern half of the country is Wallonia, where French is widely and almost exclusively spoken. Finally, Brussels is something of an island in the middle of it all, and is the only officially bilingual part of the country, where both Flemish and French are spoken.

Beyond the national and regional governments, the country is further divided into ten provinces, each of which has a capital and parliament, as well as local governments. Upon asking a Belgian friend to explain the system to me, I received the cheerful response that he would do his best, but that I should know that there are professionals who make a living by understanding and explaining how government works here. One thing is clear: Belgian bureaucracy is second to none. One way or another, though, I survived that system and no doubt several (hundred?) people gave my paperwork the necessary stamps of approval to get me, and my passport complete with visa, into the country.

My Belgian adventure thereby began

amidst the rumblings of an election, watched with great anticipation because of the growing popularity of a particular right–wing party based in Flanders that advocates rather extreme policies on things like immigration and Flemish independence.

Although the election did not result in any dramatic changes of the Belgian political landscape, the tensions remain.

Even the KU Leuven has been deeply affected by the divisions between Flemish and French– speaking Belgians. Traditionally, French was the language of the Belgian upper classes. Large coal deposits in the southern part of the country ensured economic prosperity and dominance of the region throughout the industrial revolution, but as economic realities changed, so have political and linguistic influences. As recently as 1968, the KU Leuven was a French–speaking institution, but a not altogether peaceful separation occurred that year, seeing the establishment of a new Université Catholique de Louvain in Louvain–la–Neuve, Wallonia.

As a result, I find myself living and studying in a town that is overwhelmingly Flemish–speaking. In fact, the philosophy program is one of only two that the university offers entirely in English as well as Dutch. This means that I am constantly surrounded by words that I can’t quite understand, although the cadence of Flemish is such that I often find myself thinking that I’ve actually forgotten how to speak English. I signed up for Dutch courses to provide a band–aid solution to the matter and am immeasurably, ridiculously proud of myself when I manage at the market or bakery without having to ask, “Spreekt u Engels?”

My time here has been further coloured by the fact that my great–grandfather left Belgium to come to Canada a good number of years ago. Un-

fortunately, I know little about him aside from his name and his place of birth, but that was enough for a daytrip to the town of Farciennes, in Wallonia, where he was born. The trip was more for personal interest than because Farciennes is a tourist hotspot. In fact, it was a startling journey from the relatively affluent streets of Leuven to the socio– economic realities of a region plagued by an unemployment rate of almost 20 percent. A typically bleak Belgian day, complete with overcast skies and the eternal threat of rain, probably did little to help my impressions, but the graffiti–covered train platform and underpass were only the first in a string of signs that pointed strongly towards a people confronted with idleness and struggle.

The emerging picture of Belgium might be one that is slightly unfortunate and slightly inaccurate, however. While it is true that division and debate characterize the political relationship of the two largest linguistic communities, there is much cultural cohesiveness, at least insofar as some of life’s simpler pleasures are concerned. Among the most obvious examples are beer, chocolate, and waffles, while the list is rounded out by the unexpected inclusion of Belgian fries. Yes, my friends, I now expose one of the greatest frauds ever perpetrated on the world! That fast–food staple and North American institution, and beloved base of distinctly Canadian delights like poutine, the French Fry was not actually invented by the French. Or so I’ve heard.

Admittedly I’ve not been to France to give a proper comparison here, but the prominence of stands and stores where the deep–fried delectables are available, smothered in mayonnaise or any number of other sauces (including a saus Amerikaan… I shudder to think…), really raises the question if there’s not something more going on here. It’s as if a long– standing nationalistic fry–fervour drives Belgians to consume, in the hope of preserving identity!

This little flight into hyperbole must be continued because, as with all exaggeration, there lies underneath a grain of truth. Waiting in line until one’s hair turns gray on a nippy autumn afternoon in the name of a fresh Belgian waffle is more than rite of passage; it is regular ritual. Chronic anxiety

Photos by Scott Lemoine is a real risk when faced with the potential for indecision over which chocolatier one will purchase pralines from this week. But in truth Belgians go about these things, on the whole, with a great deal of patience and poise.

That’s probably a good thing. In a country that brews somewhere in the range of 500 to 700 different varieties of beer, one can’t afford either to get too antsy or to be too faltering. Thus, when the weather permits, outdoor cafés are replete with customers enjoying a few hours’ sunshine and a favourite brew and, when climatological inclemency proves a challenge, the extraordinary number of cafés (at least 170 in Leuven alone!) means that there’s always a table available somewhere.

For those with particularly adventurous and insatiable palates, there is a bar in Brussels that offers, in a menu a couple of inches thick, a selection of 2004 different beers from around the world, including some strange Belgian varieties ranging

from secret recipes guarded by monks in their monastery breweries for hundreds of years to banana–, apple–, and even chocolate–flavoured beers. Around Leuven, the most mundane offering is Stella Artois, due in large part to the fact that it is brewed right here. The next time you go out, read the fine print on the advertisements and awnings and discover what you didn’t know you already knew about Leuven, Belgium.

Whilst we find ourselves musing over the objects of Belgian stereotypes, I ought to say something about lace. Found in profundity along the more touristy stretches of cities like Brussels and Bruges, to understand why lace can barely stand to be severed from the qualifying “Belgian”, one turns once again to history. While today a special request must be made in the shops to avoid the purchase of something made in China (owing to the fact that production costs for genuine Belgian lace are somewhat astronomical), historically Belgium played a primary role in the manufacture of cloths including lace and, more importantly, tapestry.

The stunning constructions which surround the Grand Place in Brussels and encircle several other city centers across Belgium are reminders of the amazing wealth that this region enjoyed during the Middle Ages.

Easier to overlook, though, are the canals that crisscross Flanders. These canals represent the arteries through which this prosperity flowed.

Beginning in the tenth century and continuing for the next 200 years or so, a highly skilled labour force and group of artisans arose. A great deal of commercial activity and trade developed because of the import from England of raw materials for clothmaking into the hearts of the medieval cities across Flanders. Through the 16th century, a wealthy merchant class arose that in turn sponsored the growth of many of the medieval guilds, including painters, tanners, and brewers. Most celebrated today are the treasures that remain of artists like Hieronymous Bosch, whose nightmarish panels are captivatingly rich in imagery, and Jan van Eyck, who figures among the most well–known “Flemish Primitive” painters.

As the canals began to fill with silt and a number of political factors changed, the local economy began to wane—preserving these cities in their medieval state for the next six centuries; as one approaches these cities today, one cannot help but be reminded of those exciting, opulent times.

Each skyline is different and yet still manages to be much the same. Whether graced only by one or scattered with a dozen, the constant features rising up above the endless stretch of burnt–orange tiled roofs are the belfries, clock towers, and ornate church steeples. If climbing over 300 spiral stairs to the top of one of these spires doesn’t strike your fancy, staying closer to the ground can be an equally rewarding experience. Many of the vibrant and captivating works of art so often commissioned for private chapels in the Middle Ages remain in place and on display today.

In case medieval art simply leaves you scratching your head (after room number 70 at the national gallery in Brussels, my enthusiasm had waned too), a trip to Antwerp would probably be beneficial. A thriving city, Antwerp is Belgium’s largest and is home to a famous diamond industry, numerous fashion designers, a wealth of architecture documenting the region’s entire history, and one of the world’s largest ports. While in Antwerp, you should visit Pieter Paul Rubens’ house and workshop—especially if you’d rather be rich on information than short on cash. Most recognizable to the uninitiated for his paintings of voluptuous nudes, Rubens was most productive through the first half of the 17th century, gifted not only as a painter but as a diplomat too. The majesty and grandeur of Rubens’

work is best captured in a visit to the immense cathedral in Antwerp’s centre; there, four elaborate works give a good sense of the historic importance of religion in this highly Catholic country.

I am reminded of this last fact every Sunday when, to my frequent dismay, there is very little going on in Leuven. This is not to say that everyone is attending to religious responsibilities so much as it means everyone still observes the holiday. The results, for me are the same, however. Lots of time to study. Lots of time to puzzle over questions that seem much more significant here than they ever did in Canada. Questions like, where is the tap water coming from? Often the most I can manage in response is the hope that it’s not coming from the murky and frequently pungent river Dijle that runs through Leuven.

The coming months hold much that I am looking forward to. The arrival of various family and friends signals the occasion to travel through more of Belgium, but also to leave its borders and take in some of the rest of Europe. As I bring this letter to a close, however, I am astonished to realize the sheer breadth and depth of things that I have experienced here already. From politics, to culture, to history, to friendship (sure, they got the short end of the stick here, but they’ll understand), Leuven and Belgium have left me with innumerable impressions that have spurred me on to look at the texture and richness of life more carefully and clearly. And so I sign off, simply eager to be thrown into the rush and whirl of the remainder of my year in Belgium, carried swiftly down cobblestone currents that stretch to an intricately patterned past and point to a future yet unknown.

Tekent,

Scott Lemoine Scott is a student in the College of the Humanities at Carleton University in Ottawa, Ontario.

Scott is currently completing his third year of university abroad, studying philosophy in Leuven, Belgium. Scott intermittently maintains a blog where he recounts his ongoing European adventures in (be warned) excruciating detail. It can be found at http://studio3221.blogspot.com.

incite 7

MUSINGS

r e v O e v s o r M e v i R n a Jo

By Vanessa Wynn-Williams

F

orget Paris Hilton. Perez Hilton, the pink– haired, self–proclaimed “Queen of all Media” is the 28 year–old author of famed weblog PerezHilton.com, which on 19 February, 2007 received a whopping 4.75 million hits in 24 hours. Celebrity gossip weblogs such as Perez’s have gained immense popularity over the last year or so. In early 2007, eight such sites figured in Technorati.com’s top 100 most popular blogs, a list measured by total number of unique links in the past six months. Considering the vast variety and sheer number of blogs that exist, and the fact that this list boasts sites such as the Apple and Fortune 500 weblogs, this is no small feat. Up–to–the– minute, at your fingertips, and often served with a side of sass, celeblogs offer stiff competition to traditional media outlets; they stand to take over Entertainment Tonight and US Weekly as North America’s source of juicy celebrity gossip.

But just why do we care that Brad and Angelina’s precious Shiloh Nouvel has come down with the sniffles or that Scarlett Johansson decided on Doritos, not Ruffles? Has journalism sunk to an all–time low or is it a result of a more troubling societal phenomenon? Why has the blog format in particular been rising so quickly in popularity?

Furthermore, have we, the audience, gained more control over our relationship with the stars?

We have had a long–standing preoccupation with celebrities. However, as our media has developed and expanded, so has our definition of just what constitutes a celebrity. Traditionally, only big–time movie stars, professional athletes, and politicians made the gossip headlines. In the earlier part of the twentieth century, people generally had to have some special achievement or talent to attain stardom. Articles from the early days of celebrity journalism focused mainly on the work of celebrities. It wasn’t until much later that we became engrossed in the private affairs of public figures. Today, though, everyone from c–list celebrities to socialites to people with reality–show fame (Laguna Beach’s Lauren Conrad and Kristen Cavallari are prime examples) consistently appear on celebrity gossip blogs.

Does this shift represent a sharp change in our concept of news? Some have argued that our continued obsession with celebrity and the resulting media explosion is proof of the decline of our culture. The fact that “pseudo–events” involving celebrities are making mainstream headlines, they say, shows that the quality of our news is on a downhill slide. But why? Others have put a positive spin on the prevalence of celebrity gossip media. News about celebrities allows individuals to form a cultural identity based on shared experience. Gossip is a natural social process. As our society becomes more compartmentalized, we tend to have fewer primary, face–to–face relationships, and more

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secondary relationships with people such as Hollywood stars. As Lindsay Lohan, Jake Gyllenhall, and Courtney Love are people that most of us “know,” we gain a sense of belonging by talking about them with others.

In addition, as our culture becomes increasingly commoditized, celebrities—the epitome of commercialism and consumerism—allow people to “place themselves” in our society.

Following along in this vein, to differentiate between “traditional” celebrity news (think People magazine and E!) and tabloid journalism (the National Enquirer), it is important to remember that celebrities are commodities. They are manufactured based on a certain image and have many mechanisms in place to preserve that image.

Agents, publicists, and public relations specialists work hard to mediate the interactions between stars and their audience. Due to the dual nature of celebrities—that they have both public and private lives—these professionals have quite the task. Stories and images found in more traditional celebrity news sources, even if they are of a personal nature, can almost always be traced back to a publicist or PR person. They have control over which pictures of Gweneth Paltow and her children at the park get printed in your copy of In Touch. But what happens when media sources get access to footage that is not filtered by publicists? Does the statement “No press is bad press” still hold when topless photos of Jennifer Aniston are floating around the internet?

Audiences used to idealize Hollywood and what it represented: the glamour, the excitement; but with the infiltration of tabloid media, the exploitation of celebrities has become much more commonplace. Seeing our favourite star picking his nose, or worse, cheating on her spouse, gives us a bittersweet sense of satisfaction.

The personality we have idolized is no longer picture–perfect, but is more “like us.”

Blogs have taken this idea to the extreme. It seems no one is free from the public mockery of the celebrity blogosphere. What’s more, bloggers’ snarky comments are drawing mil-

lions upon millions of visitors daily. What makes blogs so special?

The internet has rapidly developed as an incredibly accessible and powerful form of media. Celeblogs are particularly suited to the news industry because they can post up–to–the–minute stories as soon as they break. As a result, many gossip–hungry readers are forfeiting paying for stale news in Life & Style that they saw a week ago on Pink is the New Blog. Furthermore, once you’re on Go Fug Yourself, or some other celeblog, you’ve instantly found a slew of related sites, as most celeblogs have a “blogroll” of their favourite sites. Readers can also sign up for RSS feeds so that they are emailed every time the site is updated, getting their news “hot off the press.”

This brings us to another important question: what press is this gossip coming from? Another selling point of blogs is that they are underground, alternative sources of media run outside of the reign of the media conglomerates. Is this really so?

Blogs are generally just a compilation of various stories and photos taken from the paparazzi or other media sources. Many blogs get their news from “traditional” sources. A frequently–linked celeblog, TMZ.com, is under the control of AOL Time Warner. They have the money to pay for the control of the best photos and videos snagged by the paparazzi. If you’re reading something on The Superficial that was found on TMZ, are you really using an alternate media source? What’s more, these sites are making a mean profit off of advertising and merchandising. Many successful blogs have generated companies, some even networking together.

Perhaps the most unique feature of celeblogs is their highly participatory format. Readers can send in stories, star sightings (see Gawker Stalker), and make comments about the postings. Many readers feel that this aspect gives celeblogs an allure of authenticity. They gain a sense of control over their media source. But as user input usually tends to be a minimal part of the stories posted, is this a false sense of control? Are celeblogs really “democratizing” our celebrity gossip media and giving the public the upper hand as they continually bash stars, or is this giving blogs too much credit? Whatever the answer, it looks like blogs will continue to be a viable source for endless drama, scandal, and crazy celebrity antics. So move over, Joan Rivers, and make room for Perez.

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incite 9

FEATURE

Logo from http://www.thef-wordzine.com/

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Anna’s Position Statement

I’m white and privileged. Yeah, I know. I’ll shut up now. Third wave feminism is built upon a critique of feminist essentialism characteristic of the first and second waves. The history of feminism was written primarily by white women speaking from positions of privilege and yet invoking calls to female solidarity and sisterhood, and envisioning a universal position of women.

The problems with this history are obvious and I embrace the possibilities of both deconstructing and re–imagining feminist thought, including recognizing my own privilege and stake in the oppression of women. However, I am critical of a reactionary call to silence and paralysis and the broader implication that a white identity is no longer valid or useful in the feminist discourse.

I have always considered myself a feminist, being raised by a mother who was an avid participant in the second wave and who instilled a strong sense of women’s rights in her four daughters. Yet feminism means something entirely different to me now than it did before my academic endeavours in the Women’s Studies department here at McMaster. My former life as a feminist meant being certified in self–defence and waiting eagerly in every class to suggest that a woman’s perspective was not being adequately represented. I was the token feminist in every grade.

Feminism in university meant, at first, a massive existential crisis and then a whole–hearted love affair. When I arrived at McMaster, my sense of entitlement, fight for female solidarity, and even my white identity was challenged and I was made aware of my implication in perpetuating oppressive systems. Now, feminism is where I rest in tension, constantly confronting and reshaping my opinions and perspectives. Most importantly it provides me with a framework from which to look critically at the world around me.

This framework privileges marginalized voices, challenges dominant narratives, and embraces a cross–disciplined approach to feminist theory.

In fact, by the time I am finished writing this article, I might disagree with many of the things I have said. A single conversation with a friend or professor often illuminates an entirely different point of view and calls into question my previously unfaltering claims. One minute I am sure that gender is performativity, a socially constructed identity, and the next I am reminded of gender specific hormones that create a propensity for certain characteristics. But with all of this fluctuating, deconstructing, and negotiating, feminism is still one of the most grounding forces in my life.

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he following is a conversation between three self–identified feminist students. Our discussion is only a part of an on–going conversation taking place between people everywhere, discussing and debating the merits and contentions of the relationships, identities, and power dynamics that we see as normal. These discussions all fit within the domain of third wave feminism—a movement of “feminisms”, each offering new challenges to convention. We are only three people, with our own subject positions and experiences, who cannot speak as experts about a monolithic Feminism, or Women’s Experience, or anything else that often comes to mind when the word feminism is discussed.

Maya’s Position Statement

By Anna Strathy, Maya Borooah, and Leila Beheshti

I have found it quite difficult to produce this position statement declaring exactly where I stand, where I have come from, and how I relate to feminism. The challenge I face is not about lacking a strong opinion or connection to various aspects of feminist thought and activism; instead it is about locating my own position in the vast web of identities and movements that make up the various feminist groupings.

I approach identification processes with caution, since they can often connote ideas, generalizations, and connections that are not actually intended.

There are so many factors and layers to my own perspective with regards to everything—and feminism is no exception. I can say that my own experiences as a queer, labelled–as–female–upon–birth, woman–identified person of mixed ethnic background has largely shaped how I approach feminism today.

In fact, the multiplicity of identities I could embody does influence my adherence to decidedly third wave feminism. The constructivist, critical, relative, and inclusive politics and theories found in third wave feminism speak directly to the intersections of my various identities (i.e. queer, mixed race, femme, female, etc.) that often leave me in a “grey” identity zone, unable to be placed anywhere definitively. My experiences in uncategorizable zones between identities have had hugely influential consequences on how I approach any identity theories and politics, especially feminist ones.

My early introduction to feminist activism and thinking came from exposure to the feminist alternative folk rocker Ani Difranco and indie punk grrl band Sleater–Kinney. In university, I have been able to develop this critical approach beyond the typical teenage angst–y, angry riot grrl gender equality rants I used to have in high school. I now have a stronger theoretical background to question and challenge many of the dominant systems of power in academic venues. My third wave stance incorporates questioning not only normative gender roles, but also the binary gender system within which we are all forced to operate.

So, I will apologize now for not coming up with anything concrete, any definite answers or prescriptions to many of the issues raised here. Providing definite answers is not my goal or intention, and to do so would in fact be somewhat contrary to the anti–absolutism found in third wave feminism. The instability created by questioning and undermining the dominant ideologies of identities, specifically gender, can be scary and unsettling. Many of us still feel uncomfortable when we meet those who refuses to define their gender within the male/female binary we make available. It is within this tenuous zone of instability where the potential for new and unimaginable change can live and grow. It is within these unmarked, unclear, grey zones where I reside.

Leila’s Position Statement

When I was younger, my mom used to take me along with her to meetings. At the time, I was not sure what they were for, but I have vague memories of a large group of women sitting together, engaged in heated debates. Later, I learned that these women would periodically put out a magazine on Iranian women’s issues. This was where my mom carved out her political and personal space, and, I think, on some level, where my passion in feminism(s) was sparked.

As Anna, Maya, and I sat down to talk, I began to realize just how much feminism means to me.

It means feeling safe criticizing what has always been accepted as normal. It means having mind– blowing conversations where you find yourself questioning what you always thought you knew. It means imagining new possibilities within a sometimes disheartening world. It means rejecting universals and being accountable for your choices and beliefs.

Today, I feel most comfortable positioning myself in what often feels like a precarious place within third wave feminism. I have learned about the intersectionality of my own identity, of the beliefs that I have taken for granted; and I have also recognized the privilege that I have, based on my identity. Adhering to certain politics within this movement has given me the (un)comfortable space, contradiction, and language that has made critical dialogue and difference from the norm possible. I am never at ease in my (feminist) beliefs, yet there is a certain thrill in this. I have been able to negotiate new ideas with my own, and situate myself once again into an ever–changing position in third wave feminism.

Where is Feminism Now?

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A Feminism Reader

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Anna Strathy: Where is feminism now? There is no single place in which to begin answering this question.

The third wave movement has been, in some sense, hijacked by capitalist ideology. The appropriation of feminist rhetoric by marketing and advertising sectors has turned women’s emancipation into a scheme to perpetuate consumerism and materialism. Sexuality, independence, and empowerment are being invoked to sell products and reinvent brands. Women in the overdeveloped world are encouraged to embrace competition and individualism as they race to the top of the corporate ladder. Sentiments of a “lipstick” or “stiletto” feminism resound in popular culture from Cosmopolitan to Sex and the City, in which women can embrace and exude heteronormative sexuality while asserting themselves as equal participants in the work force and as consumers in the market. w

n

Do

First Wave ~ The first wave of the feminist movement refers to feminist activism in the 19th century as well as early 20th century. This form of feminism was largely concerned with women gaining the right of suffrage. Education, employment, and laws governing marriage were also points of interest. First wave feminism took place primarily within a white and middle–class population.

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MB: If those people don’t “get” the point of her undermining certain assumptions about gender, class, race, etc. then is her act actually subversive at all? This is where we can see the inaccessibility of these theoretical and critical ap-

B ar b

AS: Isn’t the point of subversion in the intention and not the reception? Must an attempt to challenge social stigmas be validated by an audience?

L ife

Maya Borooah: Leila makes a good point about the blonde “ditz” intentionally performing herself to be seen and understood a certain way, and using the assumptions her appearance incites as a point of subversion and potential change.

But even if she knows how she is being read, what about whether the people who are doing the reading are aware of the subversive intentions? If she walks past people on the street and never speaks to them, how are they to know she doesn’t act like a stereotypical blonde ditz? The blonde woman may knowingly be trying to subvert stereotypes, but what if no one around her can “read” the subversive image she is presenting?

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Leila Beheshti: Anna, to a certain extent, I agree with what you’ve said, but I do think that you point to an interesting tension. Though “lipstick” or “stiletto” feminism may have somewhat of a negative connotation, I think that it can create unique moments of subversion. Take the theoretical well–dressed, blonde woman, who in our society has often been labelled as a “ditz.” If she is aware of how she is being read and what script she has written on her body, but takes that opportunity to act contrary to the stereotypical “dumb blonde,” she can challenge common perceptions about women who look like her. That, for me, is subversive. Women of the third wave have been appropriating what have previously been symbols associated with their oppression (e.g. high heels, make up, fashion). Through the reinvention of what these symbols mean, perhaps we could reconceptualize Anna’s idea. While it may be argued that women who are buying into marketing and consumerist ploys are still contributing to the same structures that oppress them, I believe that it is possible for women to exercise agency in this context as well. Maybe it is the third wave that has been able to hijack capitalist ideology.

Second Wave ~ The second wave is most closely identified with feminist activism in the 1960s and 70s. Second wave ideas tend to universalize the experiences of white, middle–class women to that of all women. Second wave feminism is known for considering the personal to be political, and to fight officially mandated inequality, unofficial inequality, and oppressive structures.

Third Wave ~ The third wave of the feminist movement was largely developed in response to criticisms on the shortcomings of the second wave movement. Developed in the 1990s, the third wave has been characterized by its rejection of gender and sex binaries and by its belief that difference exists among women because of the various intersections and diversity of identities. Third wavers usually incorporate queer, post–colonial, post–modern, and critical theories.

Essentialism ~ The act of ascribing particular qualities and traits believed to be unique to a particular group unified by their shared identity. For example, essentialist beliefs regarding gender include the idea that there is an unchanging and universal feminine and masculine essence that women and men respectively possess.

Identity Politics ~ The political activities of a particular group unified on the basis of their identity. Identity politics can be exclusionary since it centres on the identity of a particular group, and so derives its political basis from this unification.

Intersectionality ~ The intersections of various attributes of one’s identity such as race/ethnicity, gender, sexuality, class, religion, and ability/disability.

Deconstruct ~ To break down into constituent parts and examine.

Heteronormative ~ In queer and gender theories, heteronormativity is the perceived reinforcement of conventional beliefs about gender by many social institutions and social policies.

Heteronormative beliefs include the assumption that human beings fall into the two distinct and complementary categories of male and female; that sexual and marital relations are normal only when between a man and a woman; and that each sex has certain natural roles in life.

Thus, heteronormative beliefs dictate that physical sex, gender identities, and gender roles should in any given person align to either all–male or all–female norms, and heterosexuality is considered to be the only normal sexual identity.

Normative gender roles ~ See heteronormative.

Binary gender system ~ The system where men and women are the only two recognized and legitimate gender identities. The system requires that all people must be, and identify as, either a man or a woman. A binary opposition is set up between men and women who are then positioned as opposite to one another.

Positionality ~ Where someone or an aspect of someone’s identities is positioned in relation to other things. Positionality is used in third wave feminist discourses to refer to where authors or speakers place themselves in relation to the many groups, schools of thought, and identities that make up our daily interactions and politics.

Constructivist/ism ~ This theoretical perspective looks at our knowledge and understanding as “constructed,” suggesting that it does not reflect any sort of absolute or ultimate truths.

Constructivism argues that all knowledge is based on conventions, norms, human perceptions, and social experience.

Critical Politics/ Critical Studies ~ These labels are largely associated with academic work in rigorous critical engagement with social and philosophical issues. Such work incorporates research methods from across the social sciences and often uses a Marxian theoretical framework. There is no clear or concrete definition to critical theory.

Inclusive Politics ~ Politics that do not use exclusionary methods that require concrete and distinct identities. People who have inclusive politics are typically not very strict about who can or cannot participate in certain groups or spaces, and argue that others do not always have definable or understandable identities.

Post–ist ~ The group of “post–ist” intellectual developments, such as post–modernism, post– colonialism, and post–structuralism. The “post” prefix is used because these groups have developed out of criticism for the previous schools of thought and traditions (modernist, colonialist, and structuralist respectively). They are very closely linked to and incorporated within critical studies.

Pluralistic ~ Having multiple definitions, or allowing for multiple identities/categories/possibilities; promoting heterogeneity over homogeneity, difference over sameness, and the dispersal of power over centralization. Pluralism has influenced social theories in multiple ways.

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proaches play out in real life. People may use their understanding of gender and identity performance to undermine the dominant systems of knowing and understanding each other. Yet, if no one in the audience realizes the implications of those performances, potentially those identities remain (re)inscribed in the mainstream consciousness without question.

LB: It seems as though subversion is relational, and depends on both the actor(s) and the audience(s).

MB: Going back to the problems associated with reading identities, there are many criticisms of identity politics, a central pillar of third wave feminism.

These criticisms arise from the fact that most identities are actively acquired and asserted through a shared experience of oppression. Gender— like race and sexual identity—politics requires people within the group to align themselves based on a perceived common victim position.

This is problematic because it requires a certain monolithic and generalized identity that everyone needs to recognize as the basis for shared experiences. A whole range of diversity in lived experiences then either becomes excluded or erased by the unified expectation of the identity group’s image or perception. This exclusive political play

ignores the multiplicity and intersectionality of so many potential identity points held by a single body.

AS: Absolutely. Identity politics has claimed a central role in feminist studies and yet can become another essentializing space. We ask ourselves and others to discursively fragment our identities into race, gender, religion, class, etc., and then be able to speak to those experiences under the assumption that they are universal. For example, there is no word to simultaneously assert “black” and “woman” and therefore black feminists, especially in the second wave, were often accused of addressing their womanhood before their “blackness,” as if the two were mutually exclusive and universal. Furthermore, as male whiteness (the absence of race/culture) comes to represent the neutral center against which everything else is measured, we begin to define identities in opposition and in conflict with one another. Our unique differences can then be misread as points of distance, division, and hierarchy as opposed to starting points for dialogue.

FemQuiz

4

What wave feminist are you?

1

2

3

You are walking home at night and pass a group of sex workers standing at the corner. Your first thought is: a) I hope they are is using the required forms of protection, and have access to supportive resources to encourage a non–discriminatory stance on sex work.

They have every right to pursue this line of work, as long as they feel they have a choice in the matter and do not feel oppressed in their work. b) Get those women to a polling station! c) I can’t believe they are bringing down our cause for gender equality by objectifying and selling their bodies. They are clearly just reinforcing the patriarchy and men’s sexual needs. d) What tramps! They deserve everything they’ve got coming to them.

In between classes you go into a public women’s bathroom. While leaving the stall, you see someone whose gender is unclear to you at the sinks. You react by: a) Not assuming anything about the person and smile to yourself about how comforting it is to see someone else challenging those archaic gender rules in contentious public space. b) Shaking your head in dismay at how mothers today raise their children. c) Assuming the person is a typical man trying to invade women’s space yet again. You proceed to give him a long lecture on how he should be ashamed for needing to take over what little space women have been given in this world. d) Flashing the person!

Today in lecture, your professor wrote on the board: “women and men are equal,” and asked you to comment. a) You scoff and say “pfffft that’s soooo second wave” as you roll your eyes. Women and men aren’t the only gender categories we should be considering. b) You pump your fist in the air and say, “We can’t start talking about EQUALITY until we start talking about rights!” c) You frown and say, “Yes, sure they are, in the eyes of the law, but women are still oppressed!” d) You think to yourself “I really don’t think so—women need to get back in the kitchen. Cookies don’t bake themselves!”

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LB: I agree with you both. For me, the issue that resonates very clearly with identity politics is authority of voice. As you mentioned, Anna, we define ourselves in opposition to one another—but there have been efforts to resolve this unnecessary opposition through the task of understanding individual lived experiences. What feminism tends to do is debunk many of the basic beliefs that we hold—but it doesn’t give us anything to replace it with, since, as a critical theory, it denies the validity of all “authority,” including at times its own. So we are left with the problem of who can legitimately lay claim to certain forms of knowledge. This problem can lead to tokenism, where the experience of one Indigenous woman, for example, can be considered to reflect that of all the women in her community. The problems with this, I think are obvious, in that individual experiences fail to be taken as just that—individual.

AS: There is no doubt that the increasingly pluralistic and global approach to feminism has created a more inclusive discourse. Now we’re working towards recognizing the value of every inherently unique story and individual, instead of trying to force every female to fit into a universal struggle that assumes homogenous experiences of inequality. However, the emphasis on authority and lived experience

Your best friend is upset because she was not hired at a job on the university campus. She suspects it is because she is female, and the job requires heavy lifting. How do you console her? a) You talk to her about the intersectionality of her identity and how she should use this experience as a site of resistance and empowerment. b) Together you languish over the fact that institutions have still not recognized women’s most basic rights. c) You suggest you go out together and burn some bras on the front lawn of the university. d) You pat her on the back and say, “Don’t worry, you’re just going through PMS—you’ll feel better in a few days.”

A woman has been elected as the new Canadian Prime Minster. Your reaction is: a) Is she white? It’s only progress if she’s not white. b) Excellent. Her moral superiority will surely prove advantageous in parliament. c) She will govern just as well as any male. d) That’s a good one.

Your sister is pregnant with a baby girl and you’re invited to the baby shower. Your first gift for your little niece is: a) A blue onesie—so subversive. b) A savings bond to be put towards her education. c) An invitation to a baby onesie–burning protest to rebel against the oppression of patriarchal parents. d) A teeny tiny mop and broom so that she can start practicing early.

On any given Friday night you can be found: a) At the local drag king show supporting queer people of colour consciousness awareness raising initiative against drunk driving. b) Riding your bicycle around to hand out pamphlets about the importance of voting. c) Watching the paint dry on your poster for tomorrow’s anti–pornography protest. d) Flashing people with my girlfriends on “Girls Gone Wild”.

If you could take a trip to anywhere in the world, it would be: a) Protesting the Michigan Womnyn’s Music Festival for being so gender essentializing. b) Disturbing the peace in a long skirt at parliament. c) The Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival. d) Flashing people in strip clubs in Las Vegas.

fosters cultural relativism that diminishes the possibility of meaningful intersections between personal stories. While tokenism encourages individual voices, it necessitates a dialogue in which conversation can only take place unilaterally as opposed to relationally.

LB: The monolithic feminism of the second wave led to the multiplicity of feminisms that we now have today. Often characterized as lacking unity or any particular focus, feminism of the third wave has created theoretical and practical space that exemplifies this tension. Many have argued that the lack of cohesion in the movement has made theorizing a stagnant process. My belief however is that the lack of accord in the movement is possibly its greatest strength.

This lack of accord creates the potential for dialogue, difference, critical analysis, and resistance. Does it prevent universality among women? Quite possibly.

Is this a bad thing? I’m not sure. Does it complicate the meaning and exclusion that comes with the word “woman”? Most certainly.

MB: I agree, Leila, that potentially one of the greatest strengths of third wave feminisms comes from the dialogue, difference, and resistance it

creates. This process of dismantling the rampant universality that comes with second wave feminism—and other rights and identity movements of that time period—is a first step towards creating fresh theoretical spaces and conversations.

These new places of ambiguity lack definition and give opportunity to the myriad of voices previously silenced because they reside outside of readable identities in our violently enforced binary systems. Yet it is this unclear lack of definition that makes the third wave so inaccessible to those outside of academic or theoretical circles.

How can you apply these deconstructivist theories to the lived realities of people still fighting for basic gender equality? How can you argue for recognizing multiple and intersecting identities when our institutional frameworks and systems of understanding remain so fixated on binaries and concrete identity labels?

What I’m concerned with is the growing polarization of feminism between the academic elite and popular culture, a potentially major weakness in the “post–ist heavy third wave” critical theory. Discussions of third wave feminism tend to rely on so–called “high theory”—the complex and often confusing ideas presented by thinkers such as Michel Foucault and Judith Butler. These theories challenge much of what we take to be common sense, for example suggesting that gender itself is not a binary, and not even a spectrum but rather an array of identities available to each individual. Unfortunately, all this high theory has led to a lot of academic elitism in third wave discourses that limit the potential audience and participants in this discussion to those who have read and studied the right texts. The conversations on feminism end up including a lot of university profs and not very many business execs, cashiers, or sex workers.

ed avenue between them. Feminist theory has addressed intersecting identities in the way in which it has provided an entry point for previously marginalized studies like queer theory, gender studies, and antiracist and postcolonial theory into the academy. But often the most subversive literature in these disciplines is held hostage in academic journals that force the reader to wade through dense, and sometimes pretentious rhetoric, fostering frustration and exclusivity. Without taking away from the potential power of such writing, inaccessibility has been a major problem in feminism, especially when coupled with the

AS: You highlight the increasing alienation of academia and a major disconnect between feminist theory and real material bodies.

Are the tools for a paradigm disseminated from the top down? Or must change come from a grassroots revolution? Is it one or the other? I would argue that the two, theory and practice, are mutually necessary and must exist in a supportive and symbiotic relationship. Theory changes ideology and yet observed experience also changes the way we theorize. We require an unobstruct-

accusation that the third wave has ignored the activism ingredient. Perhaps theorists should be held more accountable for producing accessible literature and initiating meaningful collaboration with activist groups.

LB: I am reminded of an article I read a few weeks ago, where feminist activists adamantly stated that they no longer read academic journals because of the elitism that can occur in academia.

While I do not necessarily agree with this somewhat drastic move, I do want to point towards a statement that sums up my sentiment towards theory and practice, by one of the most accessible feminist theorists, bell hooks. She states that theory is not inherently healing, liberatory, or revolutionary. It fulfills this function only when we ask that it do so and direct our theorizing toward this end. Taking this as our starting point for bridging the gap between theory and practice, I believe that we can affect some sort of change in a positive direction.

AS & MB: Amen, non–gendered sista–friend.

FemQuiz Guideline Mostly A’s = Ridin’ the third wave, Baby You’re a third wave (wo)man or constructed intersecting identity. You’ve watched feminism explode into a multiplicity of disciplines and embrace a more inclusive movement approached within a global framework. You have waved goodbye to gender equality and welcomed a recognition of privilege. Your existential crisis is a point of subversive discourse, but keep your work user–friendly and make sure that you’re still relating to material bodies. Take time for some old fashioned activism!

Mostly C’s = Second Wave Bust out your bell–bottoms and start burning those bras because you’re a second wave scholar! You are most at home in the melodic marching and chanting of political protests and enjoy relaxing with the latest Gloria Steinem text. Your determination and optimism are admirable, but don’t forget about the individual voices in your struggle and beware of essentializing statements.

Mostly B’s = First Wave You’re a first wave feminist! You are a major trailblazer, not afraid to speak your mind.

You can multi–task like nobody’s business and strive for perfection in all aspects of your life. Your job, writing articles, volunteering, and the laundry keep you busy but dinner is always on the table by six PM and the kids in bed by eight. You’re assertive, defiant, and care deeply about women’s rights, but be careful of narrow definitions of femininity and unrealistic expectations.

Mostly D’s = Patriarchy–Loving Sexist You are a patriarchy–loving sexist! You have your own preconceived notions of gender that are ultimately harmful to the way you see your friends, family, and people in general. You believe women should be subordinated, and that patriarchal systems, eh, they ain’t so bad! If you spent less time flashing people and more time educating yourself and supporting positive initiatives towards gender equality you’d be on your way.

incite 13

MUSINGS

Planet Boll by

B

ollywood is becoming an international force to be reckoned with. For those who don’t know, Bollywood is the name given to the Hindi–language film industry in India. The name is inspired from Hollywood replaced with a “B” for Bombay (now Mumbai) where the industry is based. It is the world’s largest film industry, producing upwards of 1000 movies annually.

But its influence is no longer confined to the sub–continent, nor to South Asian expatriates. Bollywood is infiltrating Western culture. Blockbusters of the late 90s, for example, also became considerable successes in the UK. More recently, we’ve seen several Hollywood–Bollywood collaborations, such as 2004’s Bride and Prejudice. Both authors of this article would like to be clear and firm on one point: in our humble opinions Bride and Prejudice was a pathetically lame attempt. In attempting to repackage Bollywood for Western audiences, this abomination of a film reduced the idiosyncrasies and foibles that make it unique to superficial, titillitating exoticism. This is not the way for our society to experience Indian culture. Rather, we should embrace the distinctive, sometimes alienating, but always exhilarating experience that Bollywood offers, warts and all.

The Appeal of Bollywood Even at its best, Bollywood is still an acquired taste. Many of its conventions simply do not translate into Western culture, despite the best efforts of sometimes clearly non–Anglophone subtitle writers. Nevertheless, it has a certain charisma—charisma that could entice even Chris, a self–acknowledged WASP. Several years ago, a friend sent him a video clip of the song “Say Shava Shava”.

At first he laughed at the frisky dance moves of the sexagenarian Amitabh Bachan, followed in perfect synchrony by some 200 sup-

Muneeb Ansari

and

posed bystanders. But over the following weeks, he found himself replaying the clip incessantly. Gradually he became transfixed—albeit deeply confused—by the tiny plotlet that unfolded over the course of the song. The scene appeared to be a wedding reception in which the groom, Rahul, was in love with two women other than his betrothed: one dancing at the party, and the other frolicking through the city streets. Later he discovered that these were in fact the same person, and that the first was a projection of the second in Rahul’s imagination.

A sidenote: Magical Realism is quite common in Bollywood, and difficult to separate from “real” plot twists, which are often highly dramatic but physically impossible. A nifty tip: keep an eye out for slow motion, angelic lighting, and a cooing female chorus.

These are telltale signs.

As he began to digest the meaning of “Say Shava Shava”’s antics, he found himself beginning to appreciate its subtle charm. The exoticism of the music and dancing appealed to a palate deeply jaded by high–school productions of “Annie” and “Fiddler on the Roof”.

He began to scour the Internet for material, and pestered his Indian friends for videos to borrow. But it seemed he was ahead of his time. His peculiar hobby raised the concern of friends and family, which they uneasily silenced for fear of ethnocentrism. Chris’s first roommate in university lasted all of one week, prompting in Chris feelings of guilt over his possible abuse of “Say Shava Shava”.

But thanks to the recent advent of Bollywood to our contemporary society, his love of Bollywood blossomed into maturity. Inspired by the images of ethnic diversity and cultural exchange that proliferate in McMaster’s promotional materials, he now expresses this love freely and enthusiastically. Though desis—the term Indians use to describe their expats—tend to find his story more comical than uplifting, he feels closer to them and their noble culture.

Graphics By K erry Scott

14 incite

Chris Ev

For Muneeb, there was no mo with Chris. From his youth—wh to watch 1940s black–and–white Bollywood has been a part of M epics, random breaks to perfectl and melodrama were the basic ne else was strange and foreign—in mocked for being only 90 minute might explain why Power Ranger movies).

But what is it that makes Bol ion, its attraction is in the subtly look it takes on the basics of cin stars of Bollywood are famous than their Hollywood counterpa certain “stock” roles they play.

Bollywood’s leading man—plays blubbering sentimentalists at m Khan—Bollywood’s “hunky rogu and on the flimsiest of pretexts. T celebrated physique, and possibly one facial expression. As a result for their exposition of their actors plot lines. Though Bollywood’s c and subtle to begin to be wholly d ing characteristics deserve mentio

Plo

Indians have an understandin Although nearly all movies follow not mistake this repetitiveness fo lies not in being original or unpre the trajectory of the story; it’s u viations from it in which the dram Save a few very avant–garde e unabashedly overwrought and so cally exploit each and every oppo story. The plot is not a chain of e wards a conclusion, but a tool for of a sometimes maddeningly con are secondary concerns; audien their disbelief when, for example taneously break into dance with no suspension of disbelief is nece dance number, and aren’t partic of Why? How? or What?

There are a few key moments wood love story. These set pieces ward; rather, they are the plot. Ea the dramatic consequences of th in an obvious, but agonizingly sl is in these explosive releases of greatest climaxes of the Bollywoo authors’ imaginations at least, th ance of Indian audiences are ove dies wail despondently, grandpar in exhilaration, and so on.

The first auspicious moment i the two protagonists first meet. which this comes about. Our fa wedding, and engage in a flirtatio tably strikes up. In any case, the another’s eyes in slow motion for a friend or passer–by jostles one, this point, it is safe to assume ho For one reason or another, the tw share a mutual attraction, but slo er under the auspices of an incre

lywood

vans

oment of Bollywood discovery as hen his grandparents forced him Indian films—to the present day, Muneeb’s life. To him, three hour ly synchronised song and dance, ecessities of any movie. Anything n fact, Hollywood movies were es long and too “realistic” (which rs is one of his all time favourite

llywood so alluring? In our opinbut fundamentally different outnematography. For example, the in a qualitatively different way arts. Stars become legendary for Shah Rukh Khan—indisputably impish jokesters who melt into moments of high drama. Salman ue”—removes his shirt frequently This move is to show off his much y to hide the fact that he has only t, movies are appreciated mostly s’ talents, not so much as for their charm is much too multifaceted described here, two major, definon: its plots and its songs.

ot

ng of plot unique to themselves. w the same basic story, one should or lack of inspiration. Its charm edictable. Rather, everyone knows unexpected, heart–wrenching dema ensues. exceptions, Bollywood movies are oppy love stories. Films systematiortunity to build and intensify this events that necessarily builds tor creating dramatic opportunities ntrived kind. Continuity and logic nces are encouraged to suspend e, several hundred people simulh no apparent pretext. But really, essary. Audiences are expecting a cularly concerned with questions

that structure the plot of a Bollydon’t guide or move the plot forach intervening section plays out he preceding moment, and builds low manner towards the next. It tension that we see some of the od style, moments at which, in the he highly–tuned emotional tolerercome: frumpy, bleary–eyed larents leap from their wheelchairs

in a Bollywood film comes when There are many conventions by avourite: the two catch eyes at a ous dance–off when music inevitwo will gaze intensely into one an extended period of time, until and they snap back to reality. At ow the next hour or so will pass. wo will vehemently deny that they owly gravitate towards one anotheasingly thinly veiled friendship.

During this time, one will stare at the other with a sort of desperate longing while he or she is looking away, talking to a friend, etc.

This occurrence may be supplemented with the dramatic power of slow–motion. Eventually a declaration of love or violent explosion of passion will become irrepressible, at which point comes moment number two: the catastrophic plot twist. For example, the female might reveal that she is already engaged (but never the male, oddly enough), there might be an embittered falling out between the two or their families, or some tyrannical authority figure will intervene.

Depending on the particulars of the situation, the two protagonists will struggle with the implications of the catastrophe.

This anguish often occasions a sad, slow song in which the two see visions of the other wherever they go, while friends or family members—blissfully unaware of their dejected expressions—friskily dance around them, prepare the female for her upcoming wedding, etc. After moping for the better part of an hour, one character will undertake to do something drastic. This brings us to moment number three: the passionate, public declaration of love that threatens disaster. Thanks to moment number two, external forces have made the protagonists’ love impossible. Though the characters will initially attempt to break off their affair, this proves unthinkable. At moment number three, one of them lays it all on the line. Angst ridden, but duty bound by family ties, prior agreements, or outside coercion, the other may reject this advance with an overwrought viciousness that betrays his or her true feelings.

In this case, the plot recycles through a similar chain of events to those following moment number two.

Alternatively, or perhaps after two or three such episodes, the plot surges towards moment number four: the epic vindication of true love. Whatever conflict was created by moment number two is resolved, usually through a teary reconciliation between all parties. This typically happens at a public venue: a stage, town square, courtroom etc, thus the two protagonists, unencumbered at long last, will embrace each other amid the hoots and hollers of lookers–on. This moment is a trial by fire of the aspiring Bollywood connoisseur. While Indian moviegoers have developed an iron emotional constitution to weather the sheer soppiness that ensues, it can reduce the uninitiated to convulsions. For those who can appreciate it, however, it is an unparalleled rush.

Song Ask anyone not familiar with Bollywood what they think of when they hear the term, the immediate reply is “singing and dancing.” The concept of massive synchronised dancing in the telling of a story is incomprehensible to many people. It is something that Chris, despite his assimilation into the Bollywood–watching community, still struggles with. However, the significance of song to Bollywood movies should not be underestimated. It is the songs that take the most time and money to film in the production of a Bollywood movie. To the untrained eye, the musical interludes might seem like a needless, irrelevant addition to an already lengthy feature. Even if they do not necessarily advance the plot a great deal, they overtly explain the emotions of the characters and the overall story at that point in time. Unlike in Hollywood, where movies are marketed through trailers and TV spots, the songs are what sell Bollywood movies. A typical Bollywood movie consists of seven to eight songs, though the number has been declining in recent years. The soundtrack and music videos are usually released well in advance of the movie with the filmmakers hoping that the tunes will make people go watch their movie.

A typical movie contains a number of different types of songs that correspond to stages of the plot. Songs usually mark the transition from one stage to another, and there are a number of different types of song that each movie will contain. In the first stage, where the characters are still courting each other, there is at least one cheery, happy song featuring the hero and heroine with a massive group of friends dancing around them. This number establishes

the mood for the first hour or so. Then there is the song where the characters have finally fallen in love. This song usually involves an element of steamy seduction, and also a prompt circumnavigation of various places in the world. It includes 5–10 second shots of the two characters doing one (at most two) dance moves in places such as Niagara Falls, Vegas, the Swiss Alps, Dubai, Singapore, and Hong Kong (all in the same song). Other favourite locales that are essential components of this type of song are the prancing through green fields, and on the cliffs of mountains. These locations have nothing to do with the setting or plot of the movie and it must never be thought that the characters are actually in those places.

Once the characters realize that they cannot be together as easily as the aforementioned dancing suggested, there is the sad, soppy song. In this piece, there are shots of the male and female shedding tears, interspersed by their thoughts of times they spent together. In an anomaly to the other songs, the sad song is usually also one that involves a plot advance—usually of a lengthy amount of time, such as a few months or years in which the two characters start to rebuild their shattered lives. There is very little dancing involved. Many movies also end with a song celebrating the final union of the protagonists (amongst the hooting and hollering of onlookers).

Bollywood is a powerful institution in India. Though the escapist, melodramatic genre has been dominant, in recent years films have started to focus more on reflecting the socio–political realities of the country. Watching Bollywood movies, it is easy to tell where the peace process with Pakistan stands at that point in time.

When things are tense, the movies are usually a frenzy of pro–war flag waving patriotism. Nowadays they focus on being peaceful and being good neighbours. For example, Veer Zaara (2005)—another involving Shah Rukh and Rani—portrays the story of a Hindu Indian Air Force officer in love with a Muslim Pakistani girl.

The major theme of politically oriented movies, however, focuses on criticising internal Indian politics with exposing and portraying bureaucratic and institutional corruption. While Bollywood is enormously entertaining for its unique cultural perspective, it also offers some insight into the realities in contemporary India. As it begins to be imported by the West, we must hope that it will retain its endearing nuances and cultural integrity. If not, its union with Hollywood may assume a neo–colonial bent, one chillingly akin to the cheap antics of Bride and Prejudice.

incite 15

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16 incite

Column

LOL Digital (Cult)ure

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"Moskau! Moskau!"

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Digitize Me, Captain!

OU WANT FILES? WE GOT ‘EM! COME ON DOWN TO BIG AL’S FILE EMPORIOUM! NEW AND GENTLY USED FILES FOR YOUR HOME, OFFICE, OR SCHOOL! ACT NOW AND RECEIVE A FREE* KEYCHAIN! If life were really like that, you probably wouldn’t be reading this article. The internet, also known as the intertron, the interweb, the nettertron, and the series of tubes, is a veritable gold mine for files. Any file you might want can probably be found online, likely for free. Usually there aren’t very many hoops you need to jump through when downloading, but when it comes to copyrighted materials, it’s not only a hoop, but a legal circus. In the US, the film and recording industries have all been investing in more forceful methods to control file sharing. First there was the clampdown on the peer–to–peer networks, the shutdown of Napster being one of the more famous cases. Then came the personal lawsuits, where the elderly, the young, the computer– less, and the dead were sued for their illegal downloading escapades. In the industry’s eyes, the third time’s a charm, and DRM is the luckiest charm ever to be hidden in breakfast cereal by a paranoid leprechaun.

DRM, or Digital Rights Management, is a broad term that covers any effort or technology in place to reduce copying of copyrighted materials, or the playing of such materials on unlicensed computers. For example, content downloaded from the iTunes Store has Apple’s FairPlay version of DRM strapped onto every file. The way FairPlay works is that you create an account with Apple, and whenever you download a file, it has a special key written into it. This key works with iTunes to indicate which protected files you have paid for. To play your protected music on another computer, you’ll need to register that computer, as well as have iTunes installed and functioning.

Other DRM technologies can be far more restrictive than FairPlay, and some believe that such controlled systems actually hurt music sales, online and offline, and encourage piracy. Dave Goldberg, the head of Yahoo music, has stated that through tests his company has run, removing DRM actually boosts sales. Steve Jobs, the CEO of Apple, has stated that Apple would embrace selling non–DRM encrypted music if only the four musical giants (Sony BMG, EMI, Universal, and Warner) would allow them. EMI has considered doing so, but they demanded a huge advance payment for this privilege. Who would, or could, foot this bill?

Not the middleman; the average online music store does not have the resources for such an investment, so the burden would be passed on to the consumer.

Currently, the average price for a track from a popular disc runs at about $1 CND. If DRM was dropped, and the fallout was pushed onto prices, what could we be looking at? $1.20? $1.50? Before you scoff at what is seemingly a paltry sum, consider how many songs you

A Tech Column

By Andrew Carreiro

have on your mp3 player, and figure out how much that is worth. Furthermore, if the record labels are able to increase their monetary demands to offset piracy, who knows where they will stop?

Before things start going “crazy go nuts,” let’s slow down a bit on the DRM–bashing, and look at some facts about downloading copyrighted works for free in Canada. First and foremost, let me put this on the table: it’s legal. Yep, you read correctly. It is not an offence at any level (besides possibly the pesky moral one). But before you go load up Limewire, read on: it is illegal to share copyrighted materials. So basically, by law, we are legally obligated to mooch. Downloading illegal files using the BitTorrent client is still illegal, however, because the program forces the user to share partial files. The less we share online as a group, the less there will be collectively available for download.

So we are backed into a corner. It’s technically illegal to use BitTorrent for downloading copyrighted works, so our only (legal) option is to obtain them from peer– to–peer networks that don’t strictly enforce sharing.

But, retournons–nous à notre mouton. BitTorrent, Inc. (the company, not the client) has begun a pay– to–download, DRM–strapped service. Now one might think that this is neat, but there are hidden problems.

Instead of downloading from a central source (like a website), the BitTorrent program forces people who are downloading the file to share what they have. The program hands out a bit of the file to the first person, and then they share it around to everyone else who in turn shares it to more people. But what they’re sharing at this moment is no longer the play–anywhere– at–any–time movie and music files; now they’re all DRM–encoded as well. It’s also worth it to know that although BitTorrent is offering legal torrents for which you must pay, the BitTorrent program (and its similar counterparts) are all still big names on the pirate circuit. Sites like The Pirate Bay or TorrentSpy search for Torrent files so that a group of computers can connect to each other and share copyrighted or free material.

Are you ready to ditch that tie and suit and go for a ripped, striped t–shirt with a bandana, peg leg, and eye patch? Cool the Long John act for a second; DRM and legal downloads aren’t all that bad. We can draw an analogy of the pirated versus legal–DRM content when we think of something like, say, Lego. Lego is expensive. Like, really expensive. I remember back when I was a kid, and I wanted a Lego train set, and it was like $200. Nothing happened in that department, let me tell you. In any event, Lego costs clams, while Mega Blocks cost around one small scallop. Unfortunately, Mega Blocks are horrible; they don’t connect properly with Lego or even Mega Blocks, they fall apart easily, are less lustrous, and they are far less durable than Lego. Downloading pirated versions of movies at the cost of your internet connection is cheaper than pay-

ing to download verified, DRM–enabled copies, but a lot of pirated movies are either garbage quality, in the wrong language, or are just the wrong file.

With pirated movies come dubious methods of obtaining them. First there are the annoying “screen–rips,” where a person takes a video camera of the worst quality to the theatres and holds it shakily while the movie plays and people stand up, cheer, fart, swear, and noisily consume overpriced anti–nutrition. A while back my girlfriend and I downloaded the Silent Hill movie, and it was a screen rip. The entire movie was dark to the point of being unviewable, and the sound was muffled and patchy. Weeks later, we were chatting and she told me that she had watched Silent Hill again, but as a renter from the local video store. She said that it was as if it were a completely different movie, and that we had missed so many parts because of the horrible quality. Score one for the industry. It’s not uncommon to be stumped when trying to find a song you like; you keep on getting foiled due to some very catchy 70s German pop song that has been misnamed and shared by over 40 people. Finding an excellent quality movie file on peer to peer networks is akin to the first 12 minutes of Raiders of the Lost Ark; it’s tricky, dangerous, and you might end up with an angry horde of scantily clad jungle folk chasing you through the wilderness (okay the third one is a bit exaggerated, but you still can get viruses). I’ve found that Torrents are usually a safer alternative, but still the chance remains that something may go wrong.

Now enter digital distribution with DRM. Sure these things are the tools of “The Man” but for this conversation, bury your safety pins, Sex Pistols LP, and punk–rock attitude, and try to understand. Since these files are from the official source, they’re excellent quality. Long gone are the days when you had to have all your virus scanning software running, updated, and alert while downloading; files coming from (respectable) pay–to–download sites are always clean.

Screen rips have been ripped out of the picture. Only the cleanest, crispest video quality is presented, and there’s a noticeable difference. Get tired of trying to find people sharing an old tune or flick? Dig into those pockets and pay for it. Pirated copies cost nothing, and you will often get what you paid for. DRM may be restrictive, but it keeps things exclusive and controlled.

In the end, however, I’ll have to side with piracy.

The amount of money charged for movies and music (online and offline) is purely criminal. Also, DRM is too restrictive for my liking. If I’m going to buy something, I want it to be playable wherever I am, whenever I want to, and on whatever outlet I wish. The people who lose anything in this entire copyright fiasco are usually multi–millionaires anyhow. It’s hard to feel sympathetic towards people who could spend the same amount of money on a dress as I do for tuition. Arr.

incite 17

WANDERINGS

‘ LITTLE MAC’S BROTHER

By Zsuzsi Fodor and Katie Huth

A

lthough trekking across campus to the Mohawk–McMaster Institute for Applied Health Sciences is arduous enough, we wandered even further to the Mo of MoMac’s founding institutions. In a wind chill of –19°C, we shivered in anticipation of the number 51 bus.

We broke free from the familiar route down Main Street to transfer onto the 21 Upper Kenelworth South. Call us crazy, but being fully aware that the HSR follows a standard route did not detract from our sense of adventure as it slowly crawled up the Mountain. We immediately became tourists in a city we had recently wrapped our heads around as the view of the Hamilton core unfolded below us.

A short drive down West 5th street brought us to Mohawk’s Fennel Campus, the largest of the college’s four campuses. Trying to decipher the letters stamped onto its cement buildings, we missed our stop and had to backtrack against galing winds and the traffic of students heading home from class.

The chill drove us into the first entrance we came across, also known as the “J–wing”. Maybe our thirst guided us, or the fact that Katie was studying the posted campus maps when Zsuzsi wasn’t looking, but we ended up at “The Arnie”, one of two campus pubs. Figuring we hadn’t completed enough of our assignment to reward ourselves with an afternoon pint, we took a photograph and continued on. We might have to return for the “Hump Pub” advertised for next Wednesday night, and until then, are left to wonder what exactly a “Hump Pub” entails. Strolling through the Student Centre, we peered inside the booth of C–101.5, Mohawk’s campus radio station while a DJ was speaking on the air with a caller. As we tried to venture further, we realized that we had made it to the opposite end of campus from where we had entered only a few minutes before, without having to step foot outside.

The interconnected hallways are lined with lockers and comprise the single contained building that is Fennel Campus. We were each reminded of our golden high school days, a reminiscence which was reaffirmed by the sight of “locker stalkers”— students who sat in clans socializing, flirting, and doing homework at the foot of their combination lockers. Originally planning to “blend in” with the student population by sitting in on some classes, we were put off by their small size and were afraid of being recognized as intruders. Our touristy tendencies were already earning us stares from stu-

18 incite

dents traveling in–between classes—Katie with her camera clenched in hand, and Zsuzsi filling her arms with promotional material while sporting her McMaster–brand knapsack.

And so we settled with peeking into the tiny windows of mini–lecture halls, a dozen of which could comfortably fit into McMaster’s MDCL 1305/1307.

On our hall hunt, we noticed more computer labs than classrooms—indicative of Mohawk’s emphasis on applied learning in the sciences and technology over the theoretical university approach.

Having scoped out all the science and engineering facilities, we were itching to see the arts facilities. Zsuzsi seemed to think that the sound of music guided our quest; however, Katie had likely been consulting campus maps again and slyly directed us towards the music wing. We were intrigued by four multicoloured doors just beyond the entrance of the wing. Anticipating either a Barker’s Babe lying on a car, or a troll persuading us to enter some secret underworld of Hump Pubs and outdated Dells, we were pleased to discover that each of the four rooms housed a piano. No one questioned us as we squished into the soundproof room and Katie’s fingers began to dance along the keys—just below the sign that read “No Unauthorized Use.” The cocktail waitress in Zsuzsi inspired her to get Katie to mount the piano, unfortunately without a martini or a red sequined dress. We would divulge more—but what happens in the Mohawk piano room stays in the Mohawk piano room. We also peeked inside the library, and although probably not representative of the content of the bookstacks, Zsuzsi noticed a book entitled Guide to Being a Hoser.

Circumnavigating campus, we were unable to find a residence building. We resorted to retracing our path towards the Office of Campus Tours and Student Recruitment for directions. On the way, we encountered a band of girls buzzing loudly about their inability to locate the Student Life Office. Having already familiarized herself with the alphabetized directory thanks to her strange affinity for floor plans, Katie confidently pointed them in the right direction. Back on route to the tour office, hoping to discretely snag a campus map and continue on our way, we received a symphony of greetings from eager Student Recruitment Officers.

Before we could retreat with directions to the residence, we were pulled into a conversation with one of the officers, Kelvin Lee. We told him we were from McMaster, cringing in fear that it would earn us the boot, but instead, he seemed interested in what had brought us all the way up the Mountain.

We hedged, explaining we were conducting some “research,” and he immediately launched into a spiel about the college. He emphasized the strong link between both campuses through joint Health Sciences programs, as he kindly escorted us to Mohawk’s only student residence. To our dismay, we had to leave the warm comfort of the main campus to get to the residence. Kelvin braved the cold without a coat, which did not impede his enthusiastic conversation. He randomly pointed out a high school in the distance, the elite private Hillfield Strathallan, “It’s like you have to own a BMW or a

Mercedes to go there,” he noted.

The residence building was even more impressive than the campus buildings. Its cement exterior was nothing spectacular but we were impressed with the facilities within it, especially the full athletic centre. Kelvin, with his connections to the desk staff, hooked us up with a swipecard to an empty room on the second of four floors. Already won over by the swipecard access system, upon entering room 226 we were tempted to lounge the day away in what looked like a three–and–a–half star hotel room. “What you see is what you get,” said Kelvin. What we saw were two single rooms, each with a double bed, corner desk unit, and a personal TELEVISION. The roommates also share a kitchenette, dining table, and a sizable washroom.

Only 340 of the Fennell campus’ 7,000 students enjoy this luxury while the others live in two areas of student housing. Student housing in the Mohawk neighbourhood ranges from $275 to $450. Similar to our beloved Westdale, students live in approximately half of the housing while families inhabit the other half.

On the way back to the main building, Kelvin outlined Mohawk’s plans to expand its athletic facilities, increase on–campus internet access, and renovate of the entranceway. He was excited by the new plans and had recently attended a cross–Canada tour during which he visited several university and college athletic facilities, including our own David Braley, to help Mohawk design their own.

Mac’s recent expansion has indirectly affected these plans as both schools seek funds from common donors—“We’re like Mac’s little brother,” said Kelvin, envisioning McMaster soliciting all of a parents’ spare change.

Back at the tour office we parted ways with Kelvin, laden with business cards and snazzy Mohawk pens. Our new knowledge of Mohawk beyond its affiliation with McMaster, combined with our triumph of the bus route, left us in happy spirits—returning to the campus for the Hump Pub sounds even more appealing.

PERSPECTIVE

Power to the People Q

By Shobhit Shanker

uite often, Westerners boast about their philanthropic endeavors, such as lending a hand in developing communities around the world. Volunteers tend to return home feeling good after spending thousands of dollars to fly overseas to help build schools, improve infrastructure, donate food aid, or provide temporary healthcare and education. Unfortunately, while they do this with only good intentions at heart, volunteers repeatedly confuse the important differences between casual overseas volunteering, aid, and development work—all of which have their place, but a clear understanding of each is crucial in assuring that Western efforts will promote positive change.

Casual overseas programs are perhaps the most common for volunteers to engage in. The time frame is often very short, interaction with community members is low, costs are high, and net impact is minimal. Compared with other forms of development work the effect of these trips is minimal; however, they may provide a degree of inspiration for the volunteers themselves which can foster a lifelong commitment to combating global inequalities. Aid—food, medical care, and temporary housing—is generally provided as a temporary solution for communities so that local levels of health, safety and security do not deteriorate. True development assistance, on the other hand, concentrates on building human, intellectual, and financial capacity within a community so that it is capable of climbing out of poverty over the long term.

Sending people overseas or providing temporary aid are considerably less complex than supporting development work, which is why this approach deserves particular attention.

The first question that surfaces in the broader debate about how best to promote development is what role should Westerners play in it?

In order to have a positive influence, Westerners must partner with indigenous leaders of communities who are already doing great work on the ground, and they must promote participatory approaches so that the true stakeholders are empowered to drive change. The question then becomes, if there are in fact community leaders doing excellent work, then how are they identified and supported? Tom Owen, a Mechanical Engineering graduate from University of Victoria and co-founder of the Engineers Without Borders (EWB) chapter on his campus, has spent a considerable amount of time in Africa, both

through the organization and on his own accord. While traveling down the Niger River on a quest to better understand the complexities of development, Owen saw first-hand that there is a ready pool of strong, resourceful, and courageous individuals who are committed to driving change within their communities.

The stories that Tom shared with McMaster students during his cross-country speaking tour in February provided compelling support to the claim that partnering with innovative leaders within a community holds higher hopes for positive change than conventional approaches of top-down direction. If Westerners make “valueadded” contributions to the developing world, such as disseminating information, financing projects, or introducing technology, while taking into careful consideration the socio-economic and political implications of their actions, then their role in international development efforts can be substantial.

One of the first people Owen met on this trip was Karifa Kuruma, nicknamed “The Scientist,” from a village called Yardo in the forest region of Guinea. The Scientist insisted that Tom tour his garden, which was an atypical mosaic of diversified fruits and vegetables in one garden. This would ensure good nutrition in a community that relies on growing large quantities of only a few crops, such as cassava, rice, and maize.

Kuruma called his garden an experiment and continuously innovated by trying different crop rotation techniques and new growing methods.

He logged the changes he made along with their outcome, thereby substantiating his nickname.

In addition, Kuruma, in his isolated village, began to splice mangos from a plant that did not grow well in local conditions with ones that did.

Upon returning to Canada, Owen discovered that a similar technique was used by Integrated Tamale Fruit Company (ITFC).

Westerners may be able to help Karuma in many ways. They might show him how to facilitate workshops that can help spread the abundance of information he has to his community members, provide him capital assistance in conducting more experiments, or help spread Karuma’s methodologies to neighboring villages. It should be duly noted how these suggestion vary drastically from the typical “digging a well” approach.

Along with scientific expertise, developing communities clearly possess sophisticated entrepreneurial know-how. As he ventured along the river after spending some time with Kuruma, Owen stumbled upon a group of women in Tongorongo, a small village in Mali. These women owned and operated a small but highly successful pottery business. “I came in thinking, isn’t this nice, they make two or three of these a day in a small operation,” thought Owen. But this was no “cute” operation and these women were definitely not thinking small scale.

On the contrary, the operation was quite involved: the women leaders used the concepts behind labor distribution to implement a smallscale assembly line that produced nearly four or five pots daily per person while employing roughly 20-25 percent of the women in the village. This endeavor was so successful that it resulted in the creation of spin-off support industries in the region. The women that Owen met in Mali, through their vast experience in the pottery business, are much more knowledgeable about their community’s requirements than any

Westerner. Local women must be empowered to play a key role in the development of their community, in spite of the social and cultural obstacles they may face.

In a different village in Mali called Tamani, Owen was introduced to another highly innovative individual well-versed in the economic principles of risk and return, supply and demand, and diversification. Mohamedou Nigama, a farmer, showed how he took well-calculated risks to convert a portion of his rice and millet farm into a fruit plantation. He was capable of taking a risk because if the experiment faltered, he still had a diversified asset base of rice and millet to fall back on and because he had acquired a loan of $1,200 CAD from a friend in France to purchase a small motorized irrigation pump. Without this, it would have been extremely difficult for Nigama to water his crops in the quantities required. When asked why he would concentrate on fruits, he replied that it is a commodity that no one really produces in the region, so the supply and demand curves would shift in his favor.

The risk paid off handsomely, as Nigama reaped profits nearing $100 CAD per month, in a country where the average monthly salary is $20 CAD. The key point here is that Nigama already had brilliant ideas about how to improve his life, and all he needed was the resources to implement them. While he was fortunate enough to acquire the necessary loan, there are many people who are unable to come up with the capital required to convert their visions into actions.

Well-planned partnerships between Westerners and entrepreneurs in developing communities can help channel the required start-up loans to where they’re most needed.

The stories presented here are only a few amongst the numerous inspirational ones out there of people doing excellent work in their communities every day. People from developing communities around the world may lack resources and opportunities, but definitely not intellect and innovation. Without seeking their leadership when undertaking development projects, a lot of the work that Westerners do abroad is at times misplaced, and at other times even detrimental. The focus should shift from “here, take what we Westerners have to offer” to “let’s sit down and discuss your ideas, and find out if there is anyway we Westerners can help.”

Questions? Comments?

Contact shankes@mcmaster.ca

incite 19

DEBATE

]][\]][\[[[\\\\]\][

No n-l e thal .

Weapons.]

The Lesser E

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?

[ Non–Lethal Weapons (NLWs) such as tasers, pepper spray, rubber bullets, and tear gas have become an unquestioned part of police arsenals in Canada and throughout the world. But as these weapons have proliferated so has opposition to their employment.

Claims of heart attacks resulting from taser shocks, and deaths from rubber bullets and other crowd control NLWs have become commonplace. Additionally, many people are putting forward the argument that access to NLWs is reducing the barrier to the use of force by police. Rather then restraining or talking down threatening individuals, which may pose some threat to the police officers involved, there is a strong temptation to incapacitate the person with a taser or other NLW. Police respond that NLWs have become so popular because they work. They reduce the threat to police and the public by giving police a non–lethal option to control dangerous situations.

Incite has recruited Patrick Egit to argue that NLWs need to be part of any reasonable police arsenal, and are irreplaceable in many situations. Erin Dunham responds that these weapons are not compatible with the police force’s role as guardians of the public good.

\

]

]

Better Than Bullets

By Patrick Egit

I

n an ideal society, we would be able to reduce crime in ways that would not require police. Communities would be able to provide a safe environment by emphasizing trust, respect, and the common good.

We all want to reconfigure society so that fewer police are needed. Presently, however, a safe, police–less community is yet–to–be– achieved and police are still needed to, in the words of the RCMP, “bring down the barometer of crime.” What should be done to bring down crime? After–school programs, police–community relationships, or any peaceful crime fighting initiative should be expanded. Yet, for those cases where a crime is in the process of being committed, NLWs can be used as a substitute for lethal weapons.

NLWs offer an effective and safe alternative to lethal weapons when dealing with certain, criminal situations. The principle advantage of NLWs is that they are safer to all involved than lethal weapons. In terms of direct or immediate effects, NLWs used in the context of dealing with destructive individuals or riots, very rarely if ever lead to fatalities. According to Patrick Riley, bioelectrical engineer at John Hopkins, there has

not been one accidental death in the USA caused by a taser. As opposed to guns that kill and maim regardless of how healthy a person is, nobody can die solely due to a taser shock. Those who are shocked regain complete consciousness in just a few minutes.

The more contentious issue about NLWs is their long–term, indirect effects, and, more specifically, the ambiguity surrounding their long–term effects.

Critics claim that there have been very few studies on NLWs’ long–term effects and that there should be much more research before they are used. However, it is wrong to twist the lack of research surrounding NLWs’ effects to imply that NLWs are not safe. As a matter of fact, the few studies that have been conducted have shown that many of the most common NLWs have very few long–term effects. For instance, studies by the National Institute of Justice (NIJ), the research, development, and evaluation agency of the United States Department of Justice, showed that OC, the chemical used in Pepper Spray, “produce[s] no evidence of pulmonary dysfunction, hypoxemia, or hypoventilation” and that there is also no evidence of “respiratory compromise.” Critics point to a

\\]\]\\[\[\ Veil for Violence

By Erin Dunham

N

on–lethal weapons (NLWs) should not be used by the police against the population until two major criteria have been met: proper research must be done on the short and long–term effects on the victims, and a comprehensive set of rules must be put in place to control police’s use and provide consequences for misuse of these weapons. NLWs certainly sound ideal when compared to their lethal predecessors, but a skeptical evaluation of these new technologies is vital to ensure that they are not doing more harm than good.

NLWs are used by police to control violent situations without threatening non–combatants or unnecessarily harming perpetrators—for example, as crowd control devices when riots occur or during hostage situations. The definition of a non–lethal weapon is, however, ambiguous, much like the research that has been done on the long–term effects of such weapons.

The defining quality of NLWs is that they are unlikely to kill or cause se-

vere bodily injury to the target. Another interesting yet daunting statistic is that, to be classified non–lethal, a weapon must kill less than a quarter of its targets (according to the International Red Cross) and be unlikely to permanently deform the remaining victims. One of the issues with these weapon types is the fact that the population is still at risk—albeit at a different sort of risk. Another important concern is the trust we place in the people wielding these weapons. Are the police held as accountable as they are when shooting a gun? Do they tend to use NLWs excessively due to a lack of ethical and legal consequences?

To understand the brutality of so– called non–lethal weapons, it is important to examine the possible and probable side effects of their use. The non–lethal weapons that are capable of inflicting a number of these side effects include batons, tasers, pepper spray, rubber bullets, bean bag bullets, energy weapons, and gases, all of which are currently used domestically in North America by government

][\]\\[[]][\[\][\[] 20 incite

\[][\\]\[[\[\[\][] few, select cases where someone became mentally ill after NLW exposure. However, these claims do not take into account the condition of the person before the NLW exposure and the possibility that the person’s condition was unrelated to the NLW. Clearly, there need to be more studies on the long–term effects of NLWs, especially on children, the physically disabled, and pregnant women. The studies that are available show that NLWs cause few long–term, or unintended short–term, effects. The claims that NLWs cause negative side effects are based on assumptions. While the damage NLWs might cause is extremely debatable, the damage caused by a metal bullet piercing the skull is not.

While it is clear that NLWs need to be monitored and carefully controlled, a complete boycott of their use would be counterproductive, forcing police unnecessarily to use lethal force. If one wishes to disarm an individual who is engaging in a dangerous and violent activity, a weapon such as a taser is a far safer and less damaging alternative than a gun. Of course NLWs need to be monitored and carefully scrutinized, as do pharmaceutical drugs, chemical imports, and anything for which we are not sure of the consequences. But current ignorance should not lead to unreasonable fear of weapons that in the end are far less deadly and damaging than what is currently on our streets.

Given what we currently know about the safety of NLWs, it is clear they can be used to help reduce crime in a way that is effective for the police and safe for all individuals involved. For instance, NLWs play a constructive role in helping police bring a danger-

forces. The side effects of the various weapons include broken ribs, concussions, loss of eyes, organ damage, serious skin lacerations, massive skull fractures, rupture of the heart or kidney, fragmentation of the liver, hemorrhages, and (strangely) death.

Perhaps, for the sake of accuracy, we should refer to these weapons as occasionally lethal (OLWs), as they can have some lasting effects, including death. Even pepper spray, a seemingly mild weapon when compared to its brethren, has killed over a hundred people by asphyxiation in the US while being used as a crowd control agent.

The hostage situation that took place in Russia in 2002 is a prime example of the danger posed by these weapons. Fifty separatist guerrillas took around 800 people hostage in a theatre in Moscow.

These criminals were armed with explosives and automatic weapons and demanded that Russian troops be withdrawn from Chechnya or they would kill themselves and the hostages. The Russian government refused to negotiate and decided to storm the theatre, first using a non–lethal gas released into the ventilation system to subdue the guerrillas. When the policing forces entered the theatre they found

all of the hostages and perpetrators unconscious. The hostages were sent to the hospital to receive care but about 127 of them eventually died from the gas. Luckily there were just over 600 survivors; unluckily, a great number

ous situation under control in a way that lessens the risk to all involved. In specific situations, NLWs can be used to bring a dangerous situation to a safe conclusion. For instance, tasers are used on unstable individuals who are violent or self–destructive, and the

use of the taser allows the police to stun and shock an individual into submission. Standard lethal weapons the police use to stop a dangerous individual, like Glock 22 pistols and shotguns, cause injuries to the bone and nerve that could lead to infection and amputation. All wounds from lethal weapons will lead to some kind of permanent damage to the body and a high proportion of those shot will die. Unlike the gun, the taser will not result in the death of the violent individual and, as the taser needs direct contact to have an effect, bystanders will not be put at risk. According to the RCMP website, there is not one coroner in Canada or the United States who has listed a taser as a direct cause of death.

Thus, NLWs are an alternative to lethal weapons such as guns as they allow the police to get a situation under control, inflicting minimal harm to all involved.

Another use for NLWs is in helping to deal with riots. Both Canada and the United States have a history of deadly police crackdowns on riots. In Winnipeg in 1919, police shot two protesters during a labour strike. In the United States, two students were killed at Kent State University while protesting the Vietnam War. In order to deal with mass demonstration and riot situations in ways that are not overly harmful to the protesters, police can use NLWs. Given the Canadian and AmeriContinued top of page 22

]][\]][\[[[\\\\]\][

of the survivors now suffer from a permanent physical disability or brain damage. This disaster is evidence against the effectiveness of non–lethal weaponry for “rescuing” innocent

bystanders. Can it be considered a successful rescue when hostages become victims of the police and their methods?

Every time officers pull a gun from its holster they are required to fill out a report. This accountability helps to prevent misuse of a deadly weapon by an officer, a person trusted to protect the population. These firearm laws are designed to prevent police irresponsibility and abuse of power. The strict regulations applied to the use of a gun have not yet been applied to less lethal weapons. When rubber bullets were introduced as a method to harm but not kill people, they were designed to be shot at the ground to ricochet into a person’s body; this method has been altered by certain officers who shoot directly at people—resulting in severe injuries and, at times, death. It has been reported on multiple occasions that police have held people’s eyes open in order to apply pepper spray directly, which, obviously, is not the advised use and is considered torturous. Police, when placed in certain situations, can crack under Continued bottom of page 22

[[[\]][\\]\[\[]]\[] incite 21

[\]]\[[[[\]\]]\\[]\ (Better than Bullets Continued) can history of deaths caused during strikes and riots, NLWs allow the police to deal with demonstrations in a way that will be much less likely to lead to fatalities. Using pepper spray and tear gas instead of guns has the potential to drastically decrease the number of fatalities.

None of this is to say that NLW can stop police from using disproportionate force: it cannot. Clearly, police must be trained not to over–react and to try to find non–violent means to deal with a situation. NLWs are able ensure the consequences of disproportionate force are less severe. During the 1997 APEC summit in Vancouver, police pepper sprayed peacefully protesting students. While their actions were unjust, the consequence of over–reacting was far less deadly than if guns had been used. During the annual G8 summits, protesters often accuse police of indiscriminately using NLWs like tear gas and pepper spray. However, the fact remains that the only person to die from police force while protesting a G8 summit was killed by

a lethal weapon: a machine gun.

The role of NLWs in combating terrorism has developed as a field of inquiry since the 11 September 2001 attacks. As there have been so few examples of NLW used to combat terrorism, it is hard to make a decision about their use. However, there are some tentative signs that NLWs can help bring terrorist situations under control. The one place where NLW were used in a terrorist situation was a bittersweet success: Russian forces gassed a theatre being held hostage by

Russian security forces have been every bit as incompetent in their use of lethal weapons, and arguably the results have been even more deadly. When the Russians tried to break the siege at a Beslan school, where terrorists were keeping children hostage, they opened fire prematurely leading to the deaths of 400 out of the 1200 hostages , a much greater proportion of dead than the theatre siege. With more foresight and planning, NLWs can be used to resolve similar situations in the future with far fewer fatalities. Furthermore, a few times Israel has used robots to disarm injured suicide bombers.

There are not enough cases of their use for sweeping statements, but the few cases where they have been employed have ended with no civilians injuries and the disarmament and capture of the suicide bomber. There are some promising signs that NLWs can resolve terrorist situations in much safer ways than lethal weapons.

NLWs would never be used in a perfect world.

But in the world we live in, they offer the safest, least damaging way to reduce the crime we have.

“While the damage NLWs might cause is extremely debatable, the damage caused by a metal bullet piercing the skull is not” Chechen rebels, killing 127 of 800 hostages in the process (as well as all the terrorists). Yet the reason for so many dead hostages has to do with Russian security forces’ incompetence more than the intrinsic problems of NLWs. The Russians used a far more potent gas than was necessary and they refused to divulge the type of gas they used, which meant the victims could not be properly treated.

[

]

[

pressure like anyone else, causing them to act more like thugs than officers of the law. This fact of fallibility should be considered before placing new, “safer” weapons into the hands of police officers.

Amnesty International has spoken out against the use of tasers, claiming that they are overused and have safety concerns which require more research in order to fully understand their effects.

For example, in Miami, Florida, in 2004, an officer used a taser to send 50 000 volts through the body of a six–year–old boy to prevent the boy from harming himself with a piece of broken glass. Could a fully grown adult officer not overpower a six–year–old?

Was it necessary to attack the boy with a taser? Many deaths every year occur after a taser attack, but are ascribed to natural causes, due

to a lack of follow up investigation and a lack of preliminary research to fully understand the effects of a taser on people with pre–existing health problems. Who is responsible for a person with a heart condition experiencing a heart attack that was provoked by an assault with a taser? These weapons should not be used by the police against the population until there are rules like those created to ensure

skin is burning at a temperature of 54 degrees Celsius, causing excruciating pain but no permanent damage to the victim. If a person is subject to this sort of severe pain there may, however, be mental repercussions; psychological scarring is as, if not more, damaging than scars left behind from physical hurt.

One can only guess, from past experience, that there will be insufficient research done on the long–term effects of these weapons and they will be pushed into production and onto the streets for use by authorities with no proper controls placed on them. The public has, for the most part, overlooked and accepted this cycle as the norm. For obvious reasons, we can no longer allow weapons to be tested on the population in an uncontrolled environment, putting people’s lives at risk; we should understand the capabilities of weapons before they are placed into the hands of police to be used at their discretion.

Who is responsible for a person with a heart condition experiencing a heart attack that was provoked by an assault with a taser?

(Veil for Violence Continued)

gun responsibility by our government authorities. These regulations will help protect citizens from abuses by police.

In the future, the U.S. government hopes to use a new sort of non–lethal weapon called a heat–ray gun or “Active Denial System”. This type of weaponry will use a laser aimed at a target to create the sensation that the person’s

][\]\\[\]\[\]\][]\[ 22 incite

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incite 23

WANDERINGS

Through the Fibreglass:

An Adventure in Second Life

By Ana Nikolic

S

econd Life is a strange beast. At first glance, it appears to be yet another online game, but it is really a virtual world. In Second Life you don’t blow stuff up (usually); there is no magic involved (though you can fly and create trees out of thin air); and there aren’t any elves or dwarves (but there are strange human–sized creatures called “furries”). For a game, or even a virtual world, Second Life is very unusual: it simply provides normal adults with the opportunity to pursue a “new life” online. One of the slogans Linden Labs (the makers of Second Life) uses to promote SL is “Second Life—get one.”

And recently its popularity has skyrocketed; as of 24 February 2007, Second Life had almost four million registered users, about 1.3 million of whom had been active in the past two months. What drives people to Second Life?

How real can such virtual worlds be? And most importantly, is Second Life more than just another fun way to waste some time on the Internet?

Even though I like to think that I already have a life, I considered it part of my journalistic duty to try out Second Life for myself and registered a free account. When asked to choose a starting avatar, I chose the “girl next door”, though I found it hard to resist my temptation to choose the “furry.”

Immediately after I first logged into SL, I was overwhelmed by the massive number of users online. Behind every avatar there was a real live person, and I knew about as much about their “first lives” as they knew about mine.

Almost every step I took I was bumping into people, which reminded me of my first–life clumsiness. A study found that people prefer to stand a reasonable distance from others in Second Life in much the same way as in the real world: once I gained more control of my SL body, I too found myself abiding my the “personal space” rules of the real world.

My first task was to change my appearance—predictably, I made my character look very much like myself. The avatar editor in Second Life is freakishly detailed, and almost every aspect of your face and body can be edited in meticulous detail. For females, there are three different settings related to breasts alone—size, buoyancy and cleavage. For the guys, there’s even a setting pertaining to the size of their “package”: ranging from the modest “coin purse” to the slightly larger “duffel bag”. At first, I felt kind of lost. Considering the immense number of regions and islands in SL, I had no idea where to go or what to do. The first place I stumbled into was a casino. Since I am not a compulsive gambler in real life, I decided that it was probably not something I would want to do in my second life either. Upon exiting the casino, I realized that I could fly. Well, there’s one thing my SL self can do my RL (real life) self cannot. The second place I visited was a “bunny farm”; much to my dismay, it turned out to be a strip club. I then teleported to Rome. It was really quite pretty, but most of the people there only spoke Italian. So far, I felt more isolated in my Second Life than I usually do in my real life.

I decided to look at the listing of events happening in SL. The sheer number of events and regions was massive. “Bondage furnitures at Fantasy Fetish: Get maximum pleasure with lower prims count and prices. Also selling the new chastety belt called Zapper.” Chastity belts? Spelling mistakes?

Oh my. “All furries are urged to come to club Infinity in their best groomed fur and migle amongst the pack. Best male and female fur prize at $100 min. each. What better way to rub paws or sniff butts…” A furry beauty contest?

What? If there’s one thing I had figured out so far about Second Life, is that for all its innovation, it’s one very strange place.

The other highlight of my first day was a bizarre encounter with a furry while browsing an island designed by Vassar College. We chatted for a bit—in SL you communicate by shooting off IMs, which are readable by anyone a certain distance away from you—and then she sauntered off into the distance. Furries are kind of peculiar—they are the same size as human avatars, except they have fur and big poofy tails. They kind of look like giant teddy bears, and are very cute. I then stumbled upon a cube, which gave my character one hell of a nasty dance bug. To be honest, Anniekey Whitfield (my Second Life self) is a much better dancer than I could ever hope to be.

Girl’s got flow.

On the second day of my Second Life adventure, I decided to go scavenging for “freebies”—items that cost $0 L—at various bargain–basement stores and newbie help centres. (Linden dollars are the game’s internal currency, and can be exchanged for real money). I got a pretty monstrous stash of freebies—

24 incite

some of the highlights were a totally fabulous red Marilyn–style dress, and a cheerleader costume, complete with pom–poms. Later that day, I tried camping, which is the primary way of making free money in SL (other than gambling and prostitution). Camping is essentially spending extended periods of time in a particular location, and the money is paid by land–owners. Apparently it increases the popularity of their land and makes it more valuable, so their giving you money for no reason works out (somehow). I chose an art gallery for my first camp, sat down on a rug amidst a bevy of statues and cherry trees, and relaxed. The soundtrack? Seal. Given the chunky graphics, it took some suspension of disbelief, but I felt like I was gradually beginning to understand what drove people to SL. After earning a whopping $4 L camping (the equivalent of about two cents), I decided to become one with Eastern philosophy, and sat down cross–legged in front of a Buddha statue to meditate a bit. It was very Zen; a mysterious stranger who was also wandering the gallery joined me.

The next day I stumbled upon an open–air beachfront Second Life rave.

It was full of dancing people, and the music was great. I always wondered what it would be like to go to a rave. One of the highlights was when a few guys started attempting to peddle virtual LSD to each other, which was sort of hilarious yet awesome at the same time. Upon viewing the minimap, I discovered that this island was in the shape of a yin–yang—cool!

After wandering into an undersea labyrinth (partly by accident), I made my first SL friends. I made quite an entrance, as I had been at a club earlier and for some reason my avatar didn’t want to stop dancing. It was somewhat embarrassing, but my new friends didn’t mind. After chatting a bit in the labyrinth, we tried out a teleport at the entrance by climbing into the green circle and pressing the “teleport” button. The experiment took us to a Buddhist temple on top of some mountain, which was really trippy. After the novelty of the temple wore off, we decided to go to a tropical vacation house some of them had discovered while wandering around earlier. We flew around randomly and chilled a bit in the Jacuzzi, and then two of our friends decided to jump on the crazy bed of love. While they were dry humping each other (with all their clothes still on…ewww), we continued chatting.

The animations were rather graphic. I suppose by now you must be curious about how this “Sex in Second Life” business works. Well, here’s the lowdown: there are pre–designed sex animations for your avatar (most of them involve two players, but can really involve more). These animations range from the free to the relatively expensive (approximately $5 USD). Those who take their Second Life sex seriously also get the appropriate appendages, such as virtual penises or pubic hair. The appendages are easily attached to the avatar to provide a more “realistic experience.” Some people even go so far as to add whips and other “accessories.” My friends and I, on the other hand, just found it all kind of hilarious (and hilariously weird).

Afterwards, we went outside to the backyard bar, had a few drinks and chilled a bit. Though I wondered where some of my new friends were from (because of their rather broken English), I decided to refrain from asking. One of the guidelines of SL is that you should not talk about RL—in any case, you don’t feel any pressure to. Amongst other things, one of my friends told me about some of the weird things happening on SL lately. Apparently, women are being forced to become sex slaves against their will, and the sex trade is flourishing.

Throughout my journey, I visited many places and even found the flexi–hair

that I had long desired to have (by going on a scavenger hunt for hidden masks on a tropical island, no less). Another highlight of my journey was the Star Trek Museum. That’s right, Second Life has an entire museum dedicated to Trek. They even give you freebie Trek uniforms if you’re into dressing your avatar like a member of the Enterprise crew. The Trek Museum is evidence that Second Life can act as a novel medium for conveying information online.

I also stumbled onto the CDCs (US Centers for Disease Control) corner of Second Life space—apparently it was used for emergency preparedness training post–9–11, but now it stands deserted.

So what makes Second Life different from the typical MMORPG (massive multiplayer online role playing game) format? Well, the primary difference between the two is that while MMORPGs such as World of Warcraft are primarily goal–based (kill a monster, complete a quest, get a bigger sword), Second Life has no direction or goal (other than creating a second life). Unlike MMORPGs, where a character’s appearance is relatively constant, Second Life allows the player to constantly change his or her image—one moment I can be a leather jacket–clad punk, the next I can be a buxom blonde cheerleader, the next an elegant vixen. I can even switch genders at will, though I choose not to since I feel I’d make a rather odd–looking guy. Communication occurs through text messages, so any vocal misgivings you may have are forgiven. And the immense global diversity of the userbase means that no matter what language you speak, you will surely not be alone.

These qualities have enabled the virtual world of Second Life to be used for a variety of purposes. For example, a group of researchers in Portugal allowed a group of children who had been domestically abused to use Second Life, in order to help them strengthen their social skills and regain confidence in themselves. Similarly, a group of American researchers introduced the game to some adults with cerebral palsy, as a tool to help them overcome their disability. In these ways, Second Life transcends the traditional boundaries of age, ability, and gender. The relationships SL enables us to form are simpler and contain far fewer social inhibitions than real world relationships. Adding a friend is as easy as right clicking and selecting “add friend” (if they approve of course). Once you add a person, you can see whether they are online and send them messages or invite them to parties.

The immersive and fairly low–risk nature of online social interactions is part of what makes virtual worlds and MMORPGs highly addictive. In other words, a player’s virtual world has the potential to become more palatable to them than the real world. One could spend more and more time online and become more detached from reality. In the cases of classical MMORPGs such as EverQuest, some players have even committed suicide. While critics are quick to blame the game, the issues at hand are more nuanced. Yes, virtual worlds are a form of escapism and can be engrossing. But in order to become addicted to this mode of escapism, a person must have something to escape. Although Second Life has not experienced this sort of notoriety yet, the abilities it gives to build a detailed avatar and highly structured friendships provide a similar danger if the player is otherwise emotionally unstable.

What kinds of relationships do you form in virtual worlds like Second Life?

Although Second Life is relatively new and not a MMORPG per se, the world of MMORPGs can provide an interesting perspective and SL certainly shares many interpersonal aspects with MMORPS. The Daedalus Project is a non– profit project headed by Nicholas Yee, a graduate student in psychology at Stanford University. It is a collection of testimonials from MMORPG players on a variety of issues. Within the archive, there are stories of many real–life relationships, and even marriages, initiated and cultivated during in–game interactions. Groups or guilds hold typical real–life rituals such as weddings or memorial services for players—ceremonies which also take place in the real world around the same time. There are even stories about how the perseverance of online friends in some cases turned around the life of suicidal teens. In many ways, the virtual world relationships in many of these testimonials are just as valid as the ones we hold so dear in the real world. My conversations with my online friends revealed another reason why people find themselves drawn to Second Life. It can spice up the relatively dry and boring nature of instant messaging. Before moving to SL, one of my online friends spent about a year with a service called IMVU (www.imvu.com). IMVU is an instant messaging program similar to Second Life in that it uses 3D avatars and environments. Having an avatar allows you to get a bit more creative than just “hi” and “lol”. Try commenting on the scenery, materializing a giant euglena in front of you and a friend for no reason, or even just making snide comments (in private messages of course) about the people walking by.

Second Life appeals to adults for another reason: it appeals to our innate sense of play. If you’re stuck in a stressful job all day, sometimes you need to take the edge off. It’s kind of like playing with Barbie dolls or action figures, but more high–tech.

I have fond memories of being eight years old and zooming a Barbie doll through the air from one surface to another or playing hairdresser, and I am sure I am not alone. In a way, I think Second Life is much like that; it allows us to recapture our desire

Ana’s Second Life Picks Port Caledon – This island is a sim all done in a steampunk style. That means it’s got boats, underwater dungeons, secret passages, and cutesy 19th century Victorian style houses. A variety of shops allows you to purchase period clothing, as well as “Victorian erotic toys.” Fun. Location: Port Caledon (134,125,23) Star Trek Museum of Science – The whole museum is done in the style of a ship, and some rooms are fashioned to look just like the Enterprise. There’s also a fully-3D planetarium, which is still under construction, but is largely functional, and kind of awesome. A definite must-see.

Location: Ocean Pines (31,231,25) A Virtual Festival – It’s shaped like a yin-yang, full of people, and in permanent twilight. Features several open-air DJ areas, a gigantic treehouse deep in the forest, and even a geodesic dome (perfect to meditate after having one too many virtual shrooms)!

Location: AV Festival (163,77,21) Parioli Rome Italy – A beautiful romantic sim with art galleries, restaurants, parks, fancy shops, and buildings reminiscent of old Rome. Very relaxing.

Location: Parioli (144,165,40) Instructions: When in Second Life, just click on your (big) map, type in those 3 numbers, and hit Teleport. Enjoy! to play, have fun, and be as goofy and creative as we want to be. The ability to create and design objects wherever and whenever (in a so–called virtual sandbox) allows us to take part in and take ownership of the virtual world. When was the last time you designed your own furniture?

Second Life has also found a place in post–secondary education. Some colleges and universities, including Harvard, have held classes on islands in the SL world. The traditionally stuffy image of post–secondary education is changed completely when your professor is a fuzzy “furry” with huge ears and a bouncy tail, and half your classmates are flying around. Not to mention the story of Anshe Chung, a woman who has become the Second Life equivalent of Donald Trump. It is estimated that she made about $150,000 USD last year from selling real estate in Second Life, via a network of in–game stores and classified ads. For a virtual world, there is definitely real money to be made in Second Life’s bustling economy. According to Linden Labs, the amount of money spent in SL every day is approx $1.4 million USD. These are some cases where Second Life has had interesting uses, but in some ways, its notoriety is largely due to virtual BDSM and furry sex. In contrast to this image, however, most of the people I met in my journey were surprisingly grounded, normal individuals.

But is Second Life the wave of the future? Will everyone have it by 2008?

I doubt it—we are still decades away from the fully “immersive” reality of cyberspace hypothesized by cyberpunk writers such as Neal Stephenson and William Gibson. And four million users is not that many, especially when compared to the 60+ million boasted by websites like MySpace. However, if you have a little bit of an imagination and some time to spare, Second Life just may be your cup of tea. So far, I don’t see myself becoming one of those Second Life aficionados who owns two mansions, an island, and three yachts, but don’t hold me to my word on that one. For those of you who may venture into the paths of Second Life—remember this sage advice: for the love of all that is good and holy, if you decide to have Second Life sex, please remember to attach your penis first. Thank you.

incite 25

TOOLBOX

Living

la

Vida LAVA

By Alanna Courtright and Manisha Phadnis

Getting Started

In setting up our free profiles, we immediately faced the challenge of trying to accurately represent how amazing we were, both in our own words and Lavalife’s. We were simply not done justice by the series of drop–down menus provided. Did we value respect for animals over patriotism? Were our ideals of romance more inclined towards acts of chivalry/gallantry or going to the opera? As you might imagine, we invested a substantial amount of time deciding how best to pigeonhole ourselves. While we struggled to craft the most representative—and attractive—portrayals of ourselves, we decided that there are some essential points to consider when making your own profile.

1) Photo: Have one. Actually. Neither of us seriously considered profiles without photographs. Also, try to avoid taking photos of yourself in the bathroom mirror with your cell phone. The fluorescent lights and poor resolution do nothing for your complexion and make you look like a bit of a creeper.

2) Completeness: Take the time to fill out your profile. You won’t attract a lot of attention if you have no interests listed and have nothing to say about yourself—you’re not that hot. Very few people get by in the real world on looks alone and Lavalife is no different.

3) Honesty: Selecting “prefer not to say” as the answer to “how often do you drink?” or “do you have any children?” leads people to assume the worst, so if you have no skeletons in your closet—or even if you do—be honest. Trust us, your date will notice you are six inches shorter than advertised.

How it Works

After creating our profiles, we had to decide which of three categories we wanted to appear in: Dating, Relationship, or Intimate Encounters. As we felt Intimate Encounters would perhaps be too racy for Incite—and our better judgement—we settled on the Dating and Relationship categories. Liberal use of our web browser’s back and forward buttons helped us navigate through what seemed to be an unnecessarily complicated website. We may have missed our first (or second or third) instant message because of all the colour–coded links, confusing subsections, and blinking message lights, but we persevered.

Soon we learnt that “sending a smile” was the internet equivalent of flirting, and that more advanced forms of communication included chatting and sending mail. Having not paid a cent so far, we wondered when we would have to pull out the plastic. Upon further investigation, we found out replying to instant messages or mail was free, but that initiating anything more than a simple smile came at a cost. Prepared to date on the Incite dime, we faced an unexpected setback when we discovered that the name on the credit card had to match that of the account holder. Unprepared to strike fear in the hearts of loving and concerned fathers when they read our monthly statement, we were forced to relegate ourselves to a life of Lavalife passivity. We could smile at people and hope for the best, but our future success would rely upon the initiative of others.

The Experience The Older Men Something we failed to consider was that, although we were interested in men aged 18–25, they weren’t necessarily

26 incite

the only ones interested in us.

Societal taboos had thus far kept us from being preyed upon by men twice our age, but these boundaries didn’t seem to apply in the online world. From a biological standpoint we are in our reproductive prime, but we just were not interested in bearing the children of forty–somethings itching to settle down. However, not all older men are trolling for young blood. In a rash moment, Alanna “smiled” at a “really cute and nice” 33–year–old but he never reciprocated. We ignored the possibility that he just wasn’t that into her, and instead took it as affirmation of Alanna’s good taste.

Graphics by Boram Ham

L

avalife tells us there are thousands of “sexy singles” just waiting, but you rarely hear anyone talking about how they saw the hottest guy ever last night—on the internet. There is, without question, a stigma that surrounds online dating. People think of online dating as the preserve for the socially inept, a playground for those who can’t seem to make it work in person. But are people just dismissing a good thing? We decided to find out what every single person has pondered: Is Lavalife indeed “Where Singles Click”?

The Dates Going from on–line to in person led us into uncharted territory. Should you go for it and ask him or her out right away, or wait to build some profound MSN connections before meeting in person? Either way, you’ll find yourself on a blind date at some restaurant or coffee shop. If you’re lucky, like Alanna, your date may inform the hostess before you arrive that he’s waiting to meet a tall blonde girl he met online. And you may want to book it for the door when she starts talking about how cute the whole situation is. Overall, however, most of the awkwardness is very similar to that of conventional dates—table manners that put you off and the inevitable question of whether you want to see each other again.

The Creeping We found the creepiest people were those who initiated contact not with a smile, but with an instant message. As purchasing the instant messaging option allows one to chat with unlimited users for a limited time, these individuals waste no time with pleasantries. Once, before having typed 100 characters, Alanna was invited to meet a man that night. He countered her reluctance with an offer to meet in a public place—Jackson Square—and insisted she had “nothing to worry about.” Although she had left the days of not talking to strangers behind, some shred of “Stay Alert, Stay Safe” had left its mark and she promptly went offline. In another display of instant messaging urgency, Manisha was asked to host a “kissing and cuddling” session after only six lines of conversation. Needless to say, we wisened up and learned to ignore Lavalife instant messaging.

The Standouts There was no end to the entertainment that Lavalife provided us. While there were lacklustre profiles that we quickly passed over, there were also some gems that we will never forget. One such individual not only fell under the “cell phone in a bathroom mirror” category, but also had what appeared to be a small tuft of orange poking from behind his otherwise brown head of hair, on closer inspection we saw that it was, in fact, the face of a small Hulk Hogan doll. It could have been a poorly executed joke, but we really have no idea. While we suspect that people occasionally make less than honest claims, some profiles leave no room for doubt. One poor guy was “oursuing a doctorate degree and loking to be an academic.” Good luck with that.

When we joined Lavalife, we thought that our involvement could be turned on and off and our “real life” wouldn’t intersect with our Lavalife unless we wanted it to. But while browsing locals, Alanna stumbled upon the profile of a team–mate from her local sports club and thought, “Dear God, what if he’s seen mine?!” Although we championed Lavalife in our own home, in the end we still harboured feelings of embarrassment. And so, with a respectful salute to Lavalifers more courageous than ourselves, we’ll see the rest of you at Quarters.

COLUMN

WITH ROB LEDERER

I

always thought that Tony Micelli was the perfect role model. An ex–Cardinals ballplayer with a heart of gold, he became a live–in nanny for Angela Bower after being forced to retire from the major leagues due to injury. Tony raised his daughter Samantha to become a street–smart young woman, and he always knew what to say to Angela’s man–eating mother Mona. His carefree attitude perfectly complemented Angela’s career obsessed and uptight character, allowing him to become a great father figure for her son. All in all, Tony was a pretty great guy. He even stood up for Angela when his Tony and the Dreamtones band mates refused to let her sing in the group!

Tony Micelli wasn’t a childhood neighbour of mine, nor an inspirational teacher, nor the subject of a “based on a true story” Hallmark Classics made–for–TV movie. Actually, I’ve never met him before in my life. Tony was, as you may recall, the main character from the ‘80s sitcom Who’s the Boss? While undoubtedly a wonderful addition to the Bower clan, I have begun to question whether including him in my childhood television–viewing schedule was the right decision. Sure, Who’s the Boss? was a timely subversion of the traditional nuclear family. It was madras to the Huxtable family’s bland butter chicken, a spicier alternative with pseudo–stay–at–home dad and Samantha Jones– like, elderly woman who often dominated the comedic spotlight.

Despite these saucy modifications to the stereotypical sitcom format, Who’s the Boss? is pretty straightforward. With about the same odds that the sweet smell of Amsterdam will emanate from a Ben Harper concert, you can bet that an episode of Who’s the Boss? will end with a clear–cut moral. In this way it’s like Full House, Saved by the Bell, The Cosby Show, and pretty much every other family comedy from the past 25 years. You can’t watch 7th Heaven without being confronted with the Christian way. Like Family Matters and countless other shows, its “aw, shucks” lessons are completely inescapable.

While these are all shows that I’ve enjoyed at

Sermon

some time in my life (and yes, in some cases, one of those times was last week on the Superstation), I’m starting to think that their blatant, might–as– well–be–dancing–in–front–of–you–naked morals are a little counter–productive. They’re supposed to inform kids about the right way to act, provide a basic ethical checklist, but in the end, leave only a grimace on my face and the faces of countless other viewers I’m sure.

These moral moments, which take place in the final few minutes of family shows, purport to tie the whole show together in one neat and tidy message: lying gets you nowhere, be good to the environment, Reverend Camden’s wise words should not be dismissed (so listen up Mary!), and so on. However, they arrive at this point absolutely without nuance; every stroke of the screenwriter’s pen is unapologetically and obviously geared towards driving home the moral, and as a result, the moral ends up flatter than the diet coke my dad left open on the porch for an entire month last summer.

Sabrina, the Teenage Witch is a great example; she is continually instructed by her aunts to refrain from abusing her magical abilities and using them for personal reasons (gaining vengeance on Libby, turning Libby into a goat, breaking Libby into puzzle pieces, etc.). In pretty much every episode, things begin to go awry when she ditches Hilda and Zelda’s advice, often in favour of trying to work her way into hunky Harvey’s arms.

In the episode “A Halloween Story”, Sabrina is forced to attend a family function rather than go to Libby’s holiday bash (to which she sends a clone who can only say three phrases, one of which results in her streaking in front the entire party!). In the end, Sabrina learns that family comes first; she chooses to meet her dead grandmother rather than James Dean when given the opportunity to spend half–an–hour with someone who has died, cuing a collective “awww” from the audience.

Sabrina’s realization that her relationship with her family is more important than partying with friends or meeting a sexy celebrity provides a completely legitimate message, and probably one that I

on

the

should learn to incorporate into my own life. However, the way it is introduced completely destroys the moral of the story. The message that family comes first has absolutely no weight behind it, because it is never really questioned or explored. It is the inevitable conclusion to the predicament offered at the episode’s beginning—Sabrina’ s desire to attend Libby’s get–together. After seeing the first two minutes of the episode, you know almost line for line, this week’s adventure, and the lesson that it will try to impart on you.

Without subtlety, or any kind of exploration of the message, morals are completely empty. That’s the problem with family TV—there’s no story; there’s just a moral. And, when there is no story or experience to ground a message in, it sort of becomes meaningless, slipping through the minds of the viewers like the string of a balloon through a five year–old’s fingers.

It’s unfortunate because sometimes these morals, as basic or cheesy as they may sound, really are important to remember: at times, honesty is truly the best policy, and sometimes it is a good idea to listen to mom and dad. However, if you go on out and say it like that, Uncle Jesse, it’s going to come out completely forgettable. Clichés don’t need to be clichéd; if they are presented as productive courses of action in at least vaguely nuanced situations, these morals can be meaningful. They’ve been made Pamela Andersons—empty, dismissible, laughable, plastic—when they could be Scarlett Johanssons.

Regardless, Tony Micelli and his family sitcom brethren have immensely influenced the way I watch television and, really, consume any kind of story. They’ve programmed me to expect a story’s lesson to be dangled in front of me, without having to engage with the experience of the characters. So, now that I’m all grown up and have moved on to deeper fare, I’ve had to reassess my viewing habits and expectations. After seeing how Alyssa Milano turned out, I probably should have become a bit more skeptical of Tony’s life messages. Lesson learned.

Tu b e incite 27

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