AUTUMN 2012
$9.95 (incl GST)
Influencing
Styles
USE THEM TO YOUR ADVANTAGE
&Matching Mirroring
THE MOST EFFECTIVE WAY TO BUILD RAPPORT
Cloud
?
computing WHAT’S ALL THE FUSS ABOUT ?
Marketing to
Women
CONTROL THE PURSE STRINGS AND PROFIT
Hayley
Lewis The BIGGEST
Winner
● What’s happening in the world of finance ● The pleasure/achievement principle ● Change your code to lose weight ● Stop looking for love… and find it www.empoweronline.com.au
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10 COVER STORY
The biggest winner From Olympic swimmer to businesswoman and television host, Hayley Lewis talks with Helen Rosing about her own struggle with weight and the inspiration she now feels helping others to conquer the battle.
24 BUSINESS IN PROFILE 10
A passion for shoes Jodie Fox of Shoes of Prey shares how a discussion with two friends on a couch became a successful business, allowing anyone to design their own bespoke shoe and meeting the needs of shoe fanatics across the world.
BUSINESS
22
16 Marketing to women Control the purse strings of the most influential demographic in the world. 18 Up in the clouds What does it mean to practice cloud computing? We’ll teach you. 20 What women want Find out the results of the first national survey of the Australian Women Chamber of Commerce and Industry. 22 Create a virtual team Get help in your business without employing staff or leasing an office.
CAREER
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28 Now and then We outline the main feature of the Australian Bureau of Statistics 50 Years in the Labour Force report. 30 Mirroring and matching Learn the easiest way to build rapport with anyone…without saying a word. 32 Your influencing style Become more influential by understanding your style and how to use it. 34 Time to friend social media Use social media the right way to progress in your career.
YOU
36 The pleasure/achievement principle
38
Use this thought-provoking principle to live a more fulfilled life. 38 Physiology creates
pyschology Change your emotional state by changing the way your body experiences it.
Regulars 41
4 From the desk… 6 Your Say 7 Meet the Experts 8 Acts of Kindness
40 Insightful intuition Become aware of your intuition and use it to live your best life.
LIFE
41 5 Relationship ruptures Repair the unresolved issues in your relationship before they explode. 42 Looking for love… in all the
wrong places Stop trying to find love. Switch your focus and start attracting it. 44 A joyful life... eventually Read Rhiannon Reece’s story of success and failure, and the lessons learned along the way.
WELLBEING
46 What is Skin Needling? Find out what all the fuss is about. We explore the magical little derma roller. 48 Change your code Learn the nine codes of behaviour that prevent you from losing weight and what to do to crack yours. 51 Work out to lose weight fast Find out what it takes to lose weight like The Biggest Loser contestants.
FINANCE
53 What in the world? Find out what’s happening in the world of finance and how it impacts you. 54 Buy property with your
super Don’t get left behind and learn how to purchase property using your superannuation. 56 Renting shares for profit We show you how to make money the Warren Buffet way – through renting out your share portfolio.
21 Check it out 52 Great Reads 61 Coaching Toolkit 66 15 Minutes
From the desk... “emPOWER is the vehicle for women to achieve more in their professional and personal lives.” Yolanda Vega reports back from the first national survey of the AWCCI on page 20.
Su b
Find out why we need to balance pleasure and achievement in our pursuit of happiness on page 36.
ribe sc
to
I know I am biased but I have to say I’m excited to present yet another great issue of emPOWER. It’s great to finally present Hayley Lewis on the cover of this issue mid-season into The Biggest Loser for 2012. Hayley shares her life, the inspiration she gets from The Biggest Loser contestant and her candidly talks about her own battle with weight, which started after her goldwinning performance of the Commonwealth games in 1996 and ended when she became an ambassador for Jenny Craig. In addition, we’ve got a great line-up of articles in this issue. To get you started we hear from one of the leading marketers in Australia about marketing to the strongest demographic of consumers in the world – women (page 16). We’ll also teach you how to create a powerful team for your business without the hassles of employees or need to set up an office (page 22). If you’re in need of influencing skills, learn from the best as Michelle Bowden shares her 7 I-Styles model to show you which style you use and how to become more influential (page 32). Also, learn one of the quickest and easiest methods for building rapport in our Mirroring and matching article on page 30. Once again a powerful inspirational profile piece that will truly make you feel grateful. Rhiannon Reece has overcome great stress and adversity to become the success she is today. From living with her four year old in a tent to discovering her husband wanted to be a women, read more on page 44. Keeping with our Biggest Loser theme, you’ll also find some great Wellbeing article this issue. Scott Penn, founder of The Biggest Loser Club shares the nine behaviour ‘codes’ that prevent you from losing weight (page 48) and personal trainer Amanda Preece provides a training program that will have you losing weight like the Biggest Loser contestants (page 51). Beware it’s tough! And of course, lots more to fill your mind in the You, Life and Finance sections so we hope you enjoy this latest instalment of emPOWER. And finally from me, thank you to everyone who continues to send in their words of encouragement and positive feedback. Your words ensure everyday in our office is bright and we value you greatly.
R
E emPOW
Subscribe for you or a friend this issue and receive two weeks free membership to Contours gyms, valued at $175.
Turn to page 50 to check out this month’s subscription offer. Helen Rosing, Publisher
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Publisher & Editor Helen Rosing helen@empoweronline.com.au Sub Editor Georgina Chong-You Graphic Design Design Box www.designboxweb.com
Cover Photography Production & Subscriptions Photography courtesy of Channel Ten admin@empoweronline.com.au P: (02) 9686 4398 Contributors Crystal Ading, Rachel Anastasi, Fiona Advertising Anson, Rachel Barnes, Michelle gidon@empoweronline.com.au Bowden, Theresa Chapman, Jodie P: 0402 822 722 Fox, Kirsty Greenshields, Vesna Grubacevic, Kim McGuiness, Eva Published by Kucharzewski, Kathy McKenzie, Indigo Productions Pty Limited Emanuela Pannone, Scott Penn, ABN: 90 135 381 118 Amanda Preece, Rhiannon Reece, PO Box 1397 Chris Skellett, Kate Southam, Baulkham Hills, NSW, 1755 Amanda Stevens, Lyn Summers, P: (02) 9686 4398 E: admin@empoweronline.com.au Yolanda Vega www.empoweronline.com.au
Advertisers and contributors to emPOWER Magazine acknowledge they are aware of the provisions of the Anti-Discrimination Act 1977 and the Trade Practices Act 1974 in relation to false and misleading advertising or statements under other unfair practices and the penalties for breach of provisions of those Acts. The publisher accepts no responsibility for such breaches. Opinions expressed by contributors are their own and not necessarily endorsed by emPOWER
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favourite letter I’ve been on the merry-go-round of dieting for years and will confess that I much prefer the pleasure of eating to the pain of craving. This being the case I approached your article on Get off the merry-goround (Summer 2012) with a little skepticism. I was wondering what quick-fix you would provide; I’d read so many before in other magazines. I was pleasantly surprised by Amanda Preece’s straightdown-the-line angle to give two options – give in to the craving or push through it. Almost too simple but nonetheless it made me think the next time I started to crave for the chocolate biscuits sitting in the office kitchen. I pushed through, ignored my craving and then got distracted by work. Hmm, she was right! - Mary-Ann, via email
Your article on Sealing the deal in the last issue (Summer 2012) was really informative. I have been considering promoting my business through one of the daily deal sites and this was a great guide as to what I needed to consider and be ready for. Keep up the great work. - Sandi, via email
I just to say thank you so much for the lovely package of gifts from Affirmations I received with my subscription last issue. It was so timely and such a blessing. May you all be blessed for your kindness and generosity. I am thrilled to be receiving the magazine. I must confess it’s the only magazine I choose to read and share with my friends. - Kelly-Anne, via email
“… in salary negotiations women don’t value themselves as high as they could” So true! I battled with this for years in my current role until one day I just said, “I’m sick of this I deserve more”. I knew that my male counterparts were earning more then me and from that point on I started to present myself differently and fight for what I was worth. I totally changed the way I approached my colleagues and work. I simply became more professional and learned to believe in myself. With a new self-belief in place I could then apply your tips in your article on Master salary negotiations (Summer 2012). - Bernadette, via email
I started the Ultimate Self Mastery Coaching program on your website three weeks ago and am so excited I had to write in. I am honestly feeling as though my whole life is changing and it’s due to my work through this program. My outlook has become so much more positive and I feel on top of the world. I’ve never experienced this before – living with so much happiness, determination and confidence that I can achieve the goals I set in Session 1. Life changing is the only way I can describe it. Gratitude is what I feel for emPOWER. - Kerryn, via email
I stumbled across an old issue of emPOWER in my local café and felt compelled to tell you how much I enjoyed it. It’s the first magazine I’ve come across with such a great spread of articles. I also really enjoyed your interview with Olivia Newton-John (Spring 2011) someone I have admired most of my life. My only complaint is that it’s not sold in newsagents. - Tamsan, via email Ed: We’ll see what we can do Tamsan
Submit ‘Your Say’ through the website at www.empoweronline.com.au or email admin@empoweronline.com.au.
meet the experts
to all our expert contributors Rachel Anastasi Rachel Anastasi is the founder of Free T Be Me Life Coaching and www.secretsofasuccesscoach.com. Her expertise are as a personal coach, facilitator and speaker, and her passion is to empower others. Having worked effectively with people of all walks of life Rachel has an understanding of human behaviour that assists her clients to create transformational change. Rachel also develops resources and training for other coaches.
Fiona Anson Fiona Anson is the Co-Founder of part time job website HireMeUp. com.au and the author of three business books. She has been the Small Business Expert for the Daily Telegraph and Channel 9’s Small Business Show, has written for just about every business magazine and newspaper in the country and is an engaging and in-demand speaker. Fiona is a Board Member of the Professional Coaches Network.
Rachel Barnes Rachel Barnes is the Managing Director of Property Women, an organisation devoted to helping women transform their lives through property, by providing independent education, inspiration and networking. Along with her partner John Fowler, Rachel has an investment property portfolio of 72 rentals across Australia, New Zealand and the USA. She is a regular speaker on the topic of property.
Theresa Chapman Theresa Chapman is a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) and has a Diploma of Financial Planning. She is a member of the Financial Planning Association of Australia, an Associate of the Financial Services Institute of Australia and a Commissioner for Declarations. Theresa has 16 years experience in the Financial Services Industry and regularly presents a talk-back radio program called ‘Finance Forum’.
Michelle Bowden Michelle Bowden is one of only 25 female CSPs in Australia (CSP is the highest designation for conference speakers in the world). She’s also a four-time nominee for the Educator Award for Excellence and the author of Don’t Picture me Naked – how to present your ideas and influence people using techniques that actually work. Become one of the many thousands of people who have benefited from her insights.
Kirsty Greenshields Naturopath, entrepreneur and mum, Kirsty Greenshields, knows the challenges of creating harmony in your life. She founded Create Perfect Health to teach women how easy it is to be passionate about your own wellbeing, so you can directly impact the health of your business and career. Kirsty has helped women across the world develop and improve sustainability in business by focusing on your health.
Vesna Grubacevic Dr. Vesna Grubacevic is a Performance Transformation Expert™, an internationally recognised and Certified NLP Trainer, Certified Trainer of Master Time Line Therapy™, Certified Trainer of Hypnotherapy, Clinical Master Hypnotherapist, author of the Transformational NLP Guide, creator of the Self Empowerment Technique©, and a passionate and innovative speaker. Dr. Vesna also holds a PhD, a BEc and is the owner of award-winning company, Qt.
Kathy McKenzie Kathy McKenzie is Director of registered Training organisation, FIREUP Coaching and Director of Brand Development on the International Coach Federation Board. She is a specialist Communications and Leadership Facilitator, Coach Trainer and Executive Coach, and leading contributor to the coaching profession. Kathy developed and trains a Certificate IV in Business and Personal Coaching. She is also a popular keynote speaker.
Kim McGuinness Kim McGuinness is founder of Network Central and networkingmentor.com.au. Kim has been MC at hundreds of events and has interviewed and presented hundreds of inspiring leaders and educators over the last 15 years. Kim co-runs a yearly Mentor Program and has developed training programs and conference presentations for many blue chip clients.
Scott Penn Scott Penn has been an influential member of the weight-loss industry for more than 15 years having battled with weight since his early teens. Through his business SP Health Co, Scott has developed the world’s most comprehensive online weight-loss platform that is currently powering The Biggest Loser Club in Australia. Scott is the author of The Click Diet, the newest weightloss program design to tackle global obesity.
Emanuela Pannone Emanuela Pannone is an intuitive writer and creator of Lifetiles 108 who began her career studying Fashion at RMIT Melbourne. She is passionate about developing concepts that help others follow their own intuition, in simple easy to understand ways. Her dedication to various meditation and visual techniques over the last 20 years have provided the foundation for her creative ideas to take form.
Chris Skellett Chris Skellett has worked as a Clinical Psychologist for over 30 years. He trained at Birmingham University in England, before emigrating to New Zealand in 1979. Over the past 10 years, Chris has developed a strong interest in leadership and executive coaching. Here, he has helped many clients apply the basic principles of living life well to the pressures of the corporate environment.
Amanda Preece Amanda Preece is an experienced personal trainer, yoga teacher, weight loss consultant and founder of AP Health and Fitness. She maintains a growing popularity in the fitness industry and a rapidly expanding client base. Amanda has dedicated her life to exploring and promoting pathways to women’s wellbeing and empowerment.
Kate Southam Kate Southam is an employment and careers writer, blogger and speaker. Kate is the founding editor of CareerOne.com.au, is a syndicated newspaper columnist and the author of the Cube Farmer blog on news.com.au. She has a weekly spot on 2UE and makes regular television appearances including Seven’s Morning Show, Today Tonight and Nine’s TODAY programs.
Amanda Stevens Amanda Stevens is one of the world’s leading authorities on marketing to women. She’s a renowned speaker and author of three books including PurseStrings – New Proven Ways of Reaching the Hearts and Minds of Female Consumers. She is a former Young Australian of the Year recipient and has spoken at over 350 conferences in 12 countries, sharing her unique and humorous perspectives on what women want.
Yolanda Vega Yolanda Vega is CEO of the AWCCI. She was the first editor of Wealth Creator Magazine and has more than 20 years experience in communications and business. A former CEO of the Spanish Chamber of Commerce in Australia, Yolanda has liaised with government bodies, small business and international corporations. She also represented Australia at the International Women’s Forum World Conference in 2009.
Lyn Summers Lyn Summers is one of Australia’s most compelling speakers on the share market. As well as training thousands of people to explode their trading potential, she has been a trader for 11 years. She has traded every strategy in the market through recessions and recoveries, and more importantly – made consistent, compounding profits… and made millionaires of many of her students in the process.
Eva Kucharzewski Eva Kucharzewski is the owner and manager of Exclusive Beauty Treatments Medi-Spa and has a reputation for staying ahead of the latest beauty methods, technologies and trends. She has over 25 years experience in the beauty industry. Eva’s extensive expertise in skincare, wellness technologies, and advance beauty treatments provides clients with the latest in non-surgical, safe and effective anti-aging treatments to restore and rejuvenate the skin. 7
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We can change the world, one act at a time – a little kindness is all it takes.
I
t’s quite possible you have changed someone’s day without even knowing it. Perhaps you gave a welcoming smile when they were feeling left out, delivered a compliment, opened a door, offered up your seat on the bus or were generally helpful and pleasant when it was most needed. You can probably also think of moments when someone changed your day in a similar way. What happened in each of those moments is called an Act of Kindness – a small action that can make a big difference. Here’s how some of our readers are getting in on the act.
Following one of Helen’s newsletters I decided to challenge myself to an Act of Kindness. I bought a few vases from The Reject Shop and a bunch of fresh flowers. I split the flowers up into smaller bunches and arranged them in the vases. The next morning at about 5am, I packed the vases in a bag and went for a walk. I randomly chose four houses and place the vases on their doorsteps. I didn’t wait around to see their reactions, but I know if someone did it to me, it would be a really nice surprise. And, I had a smile on my face the whole time. Thanks for the challenge. Nic – via email
There is so much litter around, it’s really quite appalling. Once a month, my family and I go for a walk around the neighbourhood with rubber gloves and garbage bags to pick up any trash we see. Since we started, a lot of others in the neighbourhood have been joining in. It keeps the area so much cleaner and then it’s nicer to live in. Michelle – via email
motivated I own a small company and always try to ensure my staff are d out steppe I Day, lia Austra after Friday the On for. and well catered go and doing were they what finish to ne everyo told and of my office for nice ing someth home early. The only catch was that they had to do we and thrilled were themselves that afternoon. Needless to say they had fun on Monday sharing how we spent the afternoon. Debra – via email
My daughter loves maths and is very good at it. She decided to tutor school kids who were having trouble with it. I suggested she charge a small fee per hour, but she didn’t want to do that. She insisted that she should do it for free because mathematics is something that everyone can use in their daily life and should be able to pass, so she wants to help them achieve that and hopefully learn to love it. I’m so proud of her. Jane – via email
having a hard time My friend is a single mother and has been so she could do free for sit baby to with her two kids. I offered ng home or going whatever she wanted, whether it was stayi and because I refuse to out. It has now become a regular thing thanks. Sometimes be paid for it, she cooks me dinner as her , put on a face mask she’ll go into her bedroom to read a book out with friends or go l she’l and go to bed early. Other times, e relaxed and she mor and ier visit family. It has made her happ better. lot a her mot good a g can concentrate on bein Kylie – via email
I am a big supporter of World Vision. My daughter and I always enter the 40 Hour Famine and get lots of sponsors for it. We also sponsor a child and donate money when we can. It’s teaching my kids to help out and give to those in need and I know they feel really good when they give back. Yvonne – via email
Submit your Act of Kindness & Win The a reader to send in our favourite and most inspiring act of kindness before 31 May will win 3 gorgeous Massage Oil Candles from Mind To Body, valued at $149.95. These luxurious candles melt into a magnificent body lotion suitable for skin care or for use as a soothing massage lotion. Try one out today. www.mindtobody.com.au Submit your Act of Kindness at empoweronline.com.au or email admin@empoweronline.com.au.
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The
BwIGiGnEnSerT From Olympic swimmer to host, businesswoman and television sing Hayley Lewis talks with Helen Ro ight and about her own struggle with we lping the inspiration she now feels he others to conquer the battle.
Autumn 2012
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Photo courtesy of Channel Ten
W
Hayley Lewis is exactly hen we met Hayley she’d expect… downyou as full a just finished filming to-earth, real and simply day of The Biggest Loser, lovely. Channel Tens successful was weight loss program. It was obvious she Q. Tell us a bit about t abou ng talki s start she exhausted but once yourself the show and her other business ventures I was born and raised in A. t there’s no doubting she passionate abou Brisbane with two older . does she t wha sisters and a younger Hayley launched onto the TV screens brother. Swimming was as a and into the hearts of every Australian an important part of my life 15 year old swimmer winning gold at the and took up a huge part of . Auckland Commonwealth Games in 1996 my childhood. My parents What most people don’t know however loved being at the beach and s is that it was Hayley’s own weight issue outdoors, and it was always that influenced her decision to retire from very important to them that d swimming at just 22, issue she’s conquere their children knew water safety win with the same attitude that helped her and how to swim. I grew up in gold. an environment where we were One thing that’s very clear about always at a pool or a beach so it was d Hayley is that she’s real; she’s not afrai inevitable that I would get involved to show her emotions and care for the in competitive swimming. I learned contestants on the show. She’s also very t many lessons through swimming. happy with a simple life and talking abou she’s Looking back, I would not have says her homewares shop in Brisbane a of t changed my childhood for anything. fron in more at peace there than camera or in a pool.
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Q. What values do you feel you have as a result of your upbringing and how have these shaped who you are today? A. Definitely the biggest thing I learnt was the value of hard work and discipline. Swimming was sport I did twice a day (six hours each day), and as a result it taught me how to be disciplined and be responsible. What you put in is what you got out. If you didn’t work hard it certainly showed in your results. I definitely learned the harder I worked the more benefits were going to be there. My training prepared me for life after swimming, and I was able to take positive things away from my experience as an athlete and use it for life after the sport. Q. Most people would remember
Q. How did the opportunity to host
The Biggest Loser come about? A. The opportunity to host The Biggest Loser came about after the previous host finished. My management team had always tried to get me involved in TV in some way, whether through commentary or something else. Interestingly, I always joked that the only thing I ever wanted to do was host The Biggest Loser because I was a huge fan of the show. I think I only ever said that because I knew it was never going to happen. When the opportunity presented itself, they asked if I wanted to be put forward for it and I said, ‘Why not’ thinking there was no way I would get it. Subconsciously I was doing that to myself so I wouldn’t be disappointed if I didn’t get the role.
Before I knew it I had a casting lady at my house. After that initial meeting I kept going back for auditions and somehow I got the job. It’s one of the best things that has ever happened to me.
Q. What have been some of your
highlights on The Biggest Loser? A. Definitely the finale. To get through it gives me a sense of pride; its the culmination of what the season is all about. Getting the contestants to a stage where they have lost weight and feel good about themselves, and seeing that unfold in front of me is quite powerful to watch. The contestants have gone through quite a lot in their lives and to witness some of them, who have never set goals or felt good about themselves s before, now feel good about themselve a see y The ng. feeli zing is an ama whole new life ahead of them.
Q. What have you learnt from the
contestants on the show? A. In a word...patience. For the contestants, you can see that they wish they hadn’t wasted so much of their life saying they were going to lose weight and going to change their life, without doing it. Then when they make
Photo courtesy of Channel Ten
you as the “Golden girl of swimming” in Australia. What do you remember of this time? A. I remember that I was always stressed and tired. It really was fun for me right up until the Commonwealth Games or Olympics. Swimming went from being fun and enjoyable to being fun and enjoyable but also stressful and I felt more responsible on my shoulders in terms of representing my country.
I guess being in the public eye has its stresses and while the winning was fantastic it did come at a price. Swimming had just become quite big in Australia so while it did have its pros it had a flipside as well. The majority of the time I was thinking that I’m the luckiest person in the world but sometimes I felt that I was the unluckiest person in the world.
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Q. What sort of goals have you set for yourself?
A. My personal goal is to run the Gold
Coast Marathon; it’s something I’ve always wanted to do. I will do that this year. Within my business life, my goal is to expand my homewares store.
Q. What are some of the special
moments for you from the show? A. The first season, I did a training season with our heaviest contestant, Shannon; he was our heaviest at 214kg. A big thing for him was to be taught to swim and be able to save himself in a water environment. To have a training session with him was really amazing. Last year we had a couple of mums who just wanted to be good role models for their kids and to see their children at finale, and how proud they were of their mums, was definitely something that made me proud.
Q. You’ve had your own battle
with weight gain. When did your weight issues begin? A. My weight issues began after competing in the Commonwealth Games in Auckland in 1990. I had stopped training for a period of time and put on five kilograms. That had never happened before and I just wasn’t ever able to get the weight back off. I was always the one who had to have special meetings with dieticians and nutritionists trying to figure out why I couldn’t lose weight and was putting on more. I never had the guts to tell my dietician or nutritionist that it was because I was sneaking food and eating a lot of junk. I dealt with stress by eating and I hid it quite well. I never did interviews
Autumn 2012
or photo shoots where I didn’t have a towel wrapped around me. People in the swimming world knew I battled with my weight but the public didn’t. Looking back I don’t know how, at that age I was able to cope. I spent many days being upset and crying and wanting to end swimming because I didn’t want to get into a pair of swimmers and be judged. I look back now and can’t believe that I didn’t watch what I was eating, especially knowing that it was effecting my swimming career and my health in general. But I guess that’s just how I used to deal with things as an emotional eater.
Q. What was the turning point for
you when you knew you had to do something about your weight? A. The turning point came after my swimming career. I struggled my whole life with my weight and it was one of the catalysts to my retirement from swimming in 1996 (at the young age of 22). Two years later I was married and had my first son. I got a call from Jenny Craig asking me to be their new ambassador. I jumped at the chance and lost 20kg in 20 weeks. That was my first realisation that I didn’t need to be a big person and I could actually change the way I ate. It was the first time I had felt good about myself in a long time and I liked that feeling. I liked getting compliments.
Q. How do you ensure your children
have a high self-esteem and healthy habits? A. My husband and I are definitely on the same page in terms of how important it is to set good examples for our two boys. We don’t live in a household where we don’t let our kids have treats. Our motto is ‘eat well but you can also treat yourself’. We don’t miss out on deserts or say ‘no, you can’t have that’.
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I think the big mistake I made when I tried to lose weight was denying myself food and then getting to a point where I would go crazy. Both of my boys are extremely fit and healthy; they both do sports and my husband and I lead by example.
Q. You’ve been with your husband
since you were 15. What do you feel is the secret to a happy relationship? A. While we’re married we’re also best friends. I don’t know the secret other than we are definitely on the same page in terms of the goals we have for life and where we see our future. We’re very similar in what we want for the kids and what we want out of life. Every year we also ensure we have things to look forward to together. It’s never felt to me as though we’re just ‘going through the motions’. We appreciate the time we have with each other.
Q. At 37, how would you describe
the way you feel about yourself? A. I feel confident about myself in terms of my life and where it’s heading. I think I’m happy when I know the kids are happy and Greg’s happy and everything is going well.
Q. Tell us about your business A. It’s a gift and home wares shop called
Coming Up Roses in Brisbane. It was a shop I frequented as a customer many years ago and a couple of years ago when I was writing a business book I interviewed the family who owned it. Mum and dad lived at the back of the store and the shop was at the front. It’s a bit of an iconic store in Brisbane. During the interview they mentioned they were selling due to health issues. It was one of those things – I’d just
Photo courtesy of Hayley Lewis
the decision they want to get there tomorrow. Because their weights are so heavy they need to be patient and trust the process we do on the show. It’s a long hard road. It’s inspirational to see people who would generally give up, instead fighting hard. There’s that person who’s never run in their life now running five kilometres. The three seasons I’ve been involved in the show it’s made me inspired to set new goals for myself.
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Q. What do you love about it? A. I love that I feel completely at peace
when I’m there. I feel more at home in the shop than in front of a TV camera or in a pool. After swimming, I didn’t think that I’d ever feel comfortable in another environment. When I’m at the shop I feel like that was what I was meant to do – own a shop and be a shopkeeper. It sounds stupid but you have to go in there to experience the specialness of it. I love the fact that I overhear customers say to my staff, “How did you get a job here?” I still remember when I first took over I changed the shop around a bit. I was struggling about whether I had done the right thing or not and a lady came in and spoke to me. She had just had a baby and her parents were visiting. She wanted to let me know she loved what I had done and said the only thing she had been looking forward to was her parents coming to stay so she would have an opportunity to visit the shop. Out of all the things this lady had chosen to do it was visiting the shop. I could relate to how she felt. It’s my little place to go to feel completely at ease.
Q. Tell us about the other projects
addition, the service is free which is great.
Q. What else would you like to
achieve in your business or career? A. I really hope that this season of the Biggest Loser is successful. It’s strange because we film half the show before we even go to air so while we think at the moment we’ve got a really special program it then starts to be dictated by what people watching the show think. I hope it does well and is on for further years. I definitely hope to in some way to be involved with the 2012 Olympics. For many years I was glad I finished swimming, but I guess being a bit older and seeing how important that part of my life was, I now have a new respect for the sport and what it provided for me. I’d love to be involved in the commentary for the Olympics. I’m a very proud Australian and to be part of something like that would be very special. If not, I’ll definitely be at home enjoying it and putting my Australian flag up on my front fence.
you are currently involved in. What attracted you to these? A. I’m involved in the Kelloggs program, MySpecialK.com. It’s not a diet or strange way to lose weight. Rather, it’s about what you will gain in confidence and a personal belief in yourself, as opposed to what you will lose. It’s almost the way I have approached my weight for a long time so I jumped at the chance. It’s also the first time, with a big brand, that I was able to give my tips and be a part of developing the exercise program and the nutrition side of it. In the past I’ve only been a spokesperson so I loved the fact that they wanted my input as well. In
Autumn 2012
Q. What is the best piece
of advice you have that might help other women realise they can reach their full potential? A. My advice is to believe that you can do anything you set your mind to. Having the background where it was drummed into me everyday and now with the Biggest Loser, I can certainly see that this doesn’t come naturally to all people. I’ve seen people go from having absolutely no self-belief and not being able to achieve things because they are so bogged down in ‘I can’t do this and I can’t do that’, to seeing that anything is possible. Sit down and make the decision to set a goal. Then, write down the process by which you are going to achieve that goal; little stepping stones to get to the ultimate goal. Then, do it.
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Photo courtesy of Channel Ten
been told by Westfields that my swim school needed to close for demolitions and I’d made a decision that after nine years I didn’t want to renew to build another pool. I was in the zone where I really wanted to have a business again. One thing lead to another and the next thing I am negotiating to buy the property. I literally closed the swim school on one day and took over the shop the next day.
e voice of
omen business owners!!!
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business | Feature
Marketing to women
Appeal to their hearts and you’ll open their purses
Sell successfully to women and you will sell successfully to men. Amanda Stevens reveals why marketing to women will prove to be successful to the growth of your brand.
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he concept of marketing to women is not new. But many brands are failing to embrace the proven principles of reaching and connecting with female consumers. The fact that women are controlling over 80% of household spending decisions has been a globally accepted statistic for over a decade. In fact, it’s been ten years since best-selling author Martha Barletta penned the definitive guide on the subject, aptly titled Marketing to Women. Since then, there have been more than a dozen books dedicated to the subject, each with its own spin on the power of the female consumer dollar and what brands could and should be doing to address this opportunity. So what is holding business back from fully embracing this opportunity? Why aren’t more brands and organisations actively marketing to female consumers? And most importantly, why do 89% of women say that advertisers don’t understand them? Despite a decade of research, discussion and advancement, there is still a persistent disregard of three blindingly obvious facts:
1. Women are still controlling or influencing the majority of all consumer purchase decisions – over 80%.
And this influence is extending far beyond the supermarket checkout; women now make up the following: Autumn 2012
• 91% of all new home purchases • 66% of home personal computer purchases • 92% of holiday purchases • 65% of new car purchases Incredibly, despite these statistics, female consumers are still labeled a ‘niche’. The reality is far from it. Without question, women are the most powerful consumer group. Globally, they control $20 trillion in consumer spending, yet marketers still seem to be hesitant about marketing to women, the common fear being that “If we’re marketing to women, won’t men feel left out?” In simple terms, marketing to women does not mean you aren’t marketing to men. There’s a great saying that if you meet the expectations of women, you often exceed the expectations of men. Women want more, and expect more. They have different needs and longer lists. They factor in a broader, more complex and more specific set of criteria going into a purchase than the average man. So if you have one shot at connecting with an audience, wouldn’t you rather be speaking to the one whose influence is growing, and who will reward you more for winning them over (generally spending more, remaining more loyal and referring you more business)?
2. Men and women are different.
One of the first books I ever read on gender differences was Dr. John Gray’s Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, the book that has sold over 80 million copies and no doubt saved countless marriages and relationships. Dr. Gray’s simple explanations of the unique structure and makeup of the male and female brains, and how this impacts relationships between the sexes, was the first marketing-to-women ‘Aha!’ moment for me. My question of why men and women are so innately different led me on a two-year research project, drawing on 16
128 existing studies, along with forging partnerships with teams of neuroscientists on two continents. Since then, I have been constantly baffled at the resistance to the mountain of undeniable scientific evidence that the male and female brains are very, very different. They’re different in size, structure and organisation. More than that, these differences have a significant impact on the way men and women think, respond, engage and bond. Not only with the opposite sex, but also with the brands they consider. So why do marketers continue to ignore and sidestep these facts, or at least fail to fully embrace them? Part of the answer might lie in the perception that acknowledging that men and women are different could possibly be misconstrued as an equality argument. Despite the advancements of women in the last century, there are still areas where we fall short on equality (average pay and leadership positions, for example). And while there is no value in exploring these issues for the sake of this column, let’s just say that the equality struggle is still alive and in play. Which is exactly where the problem lies. In the zealous, albeit well-justified, effort to address the equality issue, many people bundle in anything that sounds remotely like ‘unequal’ – including ‘different.’ During a keynote address to a franchise group a few years ago, I was explaining one of the unique aspects of the female brain – the part that controls emotion – and in doing so, explaining the practical implications of how women shop and form brand loyalty on a more emotive level. A middle-aged woman sitting in the second row (in a room of over 1,000 people) yelled out, “That’s one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard!” Stunned, I froze on stage midpoint to address her concern. When I queried her on her protest, she explained that she felt
Feature | business
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my assertions were “setting feminism back decades!” She had completely misunderstood my point and made the assumption that, because I was talking about men and women being different, I was really (in her mind) telling the audience that women were inferior to men, or not equal, or more irrational. The truth is, gender differences are very real. Men and women are really are from two different planets. And that is a completely different argument to the gender equality debate. So we can all step forward into the light and bravely embrace these differences without worrying about being politically incorrect. Without delving too deep into the heavy science of it all, there are three relevant aspects of gender differences as they pertain to sales and marketing: • The female brain is more networked and web-like than the male brain, which is more compartmentalised and structured. This means women are able to process more information, and from multiple sources (hence the dominant female ability for multitasking). It also means that women will notice a lot more in a sales situation, particularly in a retail shopping environment where senses are heightened. • At resting state, the female brain is still operating at 70% of activity, versus the male brain at 30%. As a result, women will notice more. Women expect more and we have more complex expectations when it comes to a sales situation. The little things matter. • The parts of the brain that control speech, language and emotion are far more pronounced in the female brain. This has a number of interesting consequences. Firstly, women will use language differently (including speaking, on average, 10,000 more words a day than the average man). Secondly, in a sales situation, women will generally want to talk more. (The number one reason women don’t proceed with a sale? They feel as if the salesman didn’t listen). This increased use of language and communication also has a number of other implications,
including the fact that women are able to process more complex language structure (which is why storytelling is a very powerful marketing technique).
3. Women are different at different life stages.
The needs, motivations and purchase priorities change significantly for women as they more through life stages. In other words, ‘females 18+’ is not a target audience. Understanding life stage differences is one of the greatest target marketing opportunities available to any marketer or business owner – understanding the unique characteristics of the life-stage segment you’re talking to and making your message more intimate, individual and personal. Many marketers, in a quest for maximum reach, sidestep the opportunity to tailor marketing messages and media strategy for different life-stages in the fear that the campaign message will be diluted. It’s an ungrounded and baseless concern. Assuming for a moment you have a product or service that appeals to women aged 18-50. Going to market with only one creative execution makes it incredibly difficult to create a lasting, meaningful connection. You wouldn’t talk to your daughter, wife or mother all in the same way, so why would you do it in a marketing message? The other obvious fact that is seldom fully optimised by marketers is the role that the sales and customer service activity plays in the overall outcome of your marketing efforts. Women have always ‘talked’ more than men, and that’s probably no surprise. Language is the currency women spend, depending on how comfortable and positive they feel in a given situation, which is why the ultimate threat for a woman when they feel someone has done the wrong thing by them is “I will never speak to you again!” (the threat of with-holding words – something you rarely hear from a man). So women talk more. What does that mean? It means that women, given the right circumstances, will gladly become walking advocates for your brand. If women have a good customer experience,
they are 10-20 times more likely than a man to refer others to you. It’s part of the female DNA to share, whether it be ideas, feelings, stories, opinions, recipes or store recommendations. As women, when we have a good experience, we want our friends, colleagues, sisters and mothers to have the same experience. If we have a negative experience, multiply that dynamic by 50! Women will go out of their way to warn others when we have a negative experience. Other women will vote with their feet and purses in sympathy.
Female consumers are not a ‘niche’. They are by far the most powerful consumer group. Globally, they control $20 trillion in consumer spending.
Amanda’s new book PURSESTRI NGS PurseStrings – New, Proven Ways AMANDA STEVENS & THOMAS JORDAN of Reaching the Hearts and Minds of Female Consumers is available at www.amandastevens. com.au ($24.95 inc shipping) NEW, PROVEN WAYS OF REACHING THE HEARTS AND MINDS OF FEMALE
Author of SheMarketing & SheSelling
CONSUMERS
Author of Re-Render the Gender
Amanda Stevens is one of the world’s leading authorities on marketing to women. She’s a renowned speaker and author, whose previous books include SheMarketing; The Science of Marketing to Women and SheSelling; The Psychology of Selling to Women. She is a former Young Australian of the Year recipient. www.amandastevens.com.au
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business | Feature
Up in clouds the The term ‘cloud computing’ keeps popping up, both online and off. But what is it really, and what difference does it make to your life, work, or business? Crystal Ading explains…
C
loud computing is storing your data online, instead of using manual files, hardware, or software. The Cloud is a metaphor for the Internet, and clouds can store and run everything from spreadsheets, text documents and slide presentations to complex databases, photos, images, videography, and sound recordings. Much of the world is already using cloud computing, though they may not consciously be aware of or. Everyday examples of cloud computing include Gmail, Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, and Instant Messaging. Your emails, status updates, and chats are not stored on any physical file. They don’t sit on your computer hard drive. They are stored online, and whenever you need them, you simply log on, read them, edit them, and use them. Each time you log off, you know all your data is safe and instantly accessible the next time you need it.
Why use the cloud?
With cloud computing, all your data is stored online, so you have a constant backup that can’t be damaged by computer crashes, loss, theft, or even natural disasters. Since your applications are running online, rather than on your machine, your computer runs faster and is less susceptible to wear and tear. Cloud computing also eliminates the need for expensive and time consuming software updates, since all cloud computing mechanisms are updated automatically on external servers. These automatic updates are hassle-free, and they reduce the risk of viruses and worms. cloud computing also includes additional layers of user
Autumn 2012
authentication, which makes it that much harder for hackers and malicious software to damage your data. Cloud computing reduces the cost of running a business in other ways. Storing your data online means you need less physical space, so you can spend less on the rental costs of your business premises. You also spend less on digital maintenance and staff training. If you’re starting out, a cloud computing model will require lower levels of capital than a typical manual or digital business setup. You don’t need infrastructure, hardware, or software. You just need a reliable Internet connection, an access point, and you’re ready to go.
Types of clouds
There are four main types of cloud: public, community, private, and hybrid. Public Clouds are available to everyone on the Internet, usually for free. Examples include Facebook or Google Docs. Users can access these public clouds, create documents and folders, and store them online. Most public clouds provide additional services like extra storage at a premium fee. Community Clouds usually spread the cloud services over different organisations for a specific interest. Community Clouds can be formed for matters such as security, health, or compliance with a certain policy. The clouds can be managed externally or by one of the organisations involved. Private Clouds contain data owned by an individual or organisation. The individual or organisation itself often hosts them rather than an external service provider. They require more direct involvement than other cloud types. Finally, Hybrid Clouds are simply a pick-and-
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choose multiple cloud amalgamation of the other cloud types.
Cloud computing risks
Many people worry that cloud computing is a security risk, since the service provider can directly access your data. They also worry they may not be able to monitor their own data while it’s literally in someone else’s hands. Others worry the cloud structure is not compatible with their current IT systems and policies. They feel it may require an expensive overhaul, or that it may make their current systems redundant, which could be a loss on their previous IT investment. Cloud computing is often managed by external technicians, so some firms worry they may not reach them when they needed. They also worry that basing a business online could lead to issues with international compliance. These issues may be caused by conflicting laws in the countries where servers are hosted. Cloud computing is a relatively new concept. There are no standards in place, so users can’t accurately judge the quality of the service, since there’s nothing to compare it to. In addition, businesses fear they may not be able to opt out of the service at will.
Cloud computing in Australia A recent survey indicates that 70% of businesses in Australia have a positive attitude towards cloud computing, and are either already using it or are actively implementing the shift within two years. Don’t be left behind.
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business | Research
What women Yolanda Vega shares the results of the first Australian Women Chamber of Commerce and Industry’s national research project.
I
n the movie What Women Want (a Nancy Meyers film), the main character, Nick, is an advertising hotshot. One day, following an accident while blow-drying his hair he miraculously begins to hear women’s thoughts and learn what they really want. Imagination is a wonderful thing, but reality is often more fascinating than fiction. I do wish at times for the same gift Nick had in the film. So in order to find out what women business owners want and need to grow their business, the AWCCI has taken to listening to women via a national research project. Most of my time during the latter part of 2011 at the AWCCI was spent launching the first national women business owners research project. I wrote grant applications and traveled the country speaking to researchers, universities professors, policy advisors, ministers, and women’s groups. Why no national research has been conducted in the past to find out what women business owners want and need is a serious mystery. In response to the project, thousands of women around the country took the time to have their voices heard. There were some very interesting surprises, and some data was confirmed which was previously only anecdotal.
want
Reasons for leaving and previous employment: • 71% are operating their first business, and the great majority of these were previously employees • 50.1% stated their reason for leaving was to be their own boss • 44.3% started their own business to obtain work/life balance Of these: • 46.7% occupied middle management positions when employed • 31.5% were in upper management positions (responsible for the Profit and Loss for their respective employers) • 6% were employed as CEO or Managing Director before leaving their employer Education of respondents: • 38.8% have a university degree • 17.6% have completed a Masters Degree • 2.1% have a Doctorate Approximately 75% of the research respondents said they had started their business based on an initial idea. Of these: • 43% are sole traders • 43.1% own a company • 10.1% are in a business partnership The most popular social medium used by respondents is Facebook. • 16% of their customers are sourced from Social Media • 15.5% did not want to use social media in their business • 21.9% did not use social media but want to in the future Some other interesting – and surprising – results: • 53.1% stated that they prefer to attend courses in person • 2.2% advised they prefer courses via the internet (webinars) • 79.8% said that their customers did not purchase their product and/or service online
On a more personal level: • 45.7% of respondents have dependent children living at home • 86.0% of respondents want childcare to be tax deductible • 34.5% pay for childcare from income earned from their business Regarding networking: • 42.9% of respondents are not members of a network group • 57.1% belong to a network group • 25.5% of those who do belong to a network group attend them on a weekly basis • 32.0% attend on a monthly basis The reasons for attending network groups vary: • 54.3% network for social reasons • 46.3% attend to keep up to date with trends • 59.1% attend in order to obtain new ideas • 51.6% attend to get client referrals • 30.3% attend to obtain critical information on running their business Approximately 39% of respondents advised they have a mentor, the majority meeting with their mentor every couple of months: • 36.3% have two mentors • 13.3% have more than three mentors • 1.2% advised that their mentor/s is/are not useful for their business Regarding the future of their business: • 41.6% said they have goals to grow and are actively seeking to achieve growth • 29.9% said they need more information on how to go about growing their business into new markets • 50.5% said they require more funds in order to expand their business A little concerning was learning that 76.4% of respondents do not have an exit strategy for their business even though the majority of respondents are working an average of 50 hours each week including weekends!
Yolanda Vega is CEO of the Australian Women’s Chamber of Commerce and Industry. She was CEO of the Spanish Chamber of Commerce in Australia and has more than 20 years of experience in communications and business. She also represented Australia at the International Women’s Forum World Conference in 2009. www.awcci.org.au
Autumn 2012
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business | Marketing
Create a virtual team A successful business needs a successful team. Kim McGuinness teaches you how to utilise the technology of today to create efficient and effective virtual teams for your business.
O
nce upon a time a business had to rely on paper, pencils and an office with a telephone to employ staff and conduct business. While this is a great way to work, it can be expensive for the small business owner. These days a business can have a global presence, perform all the required business functions, and run it all from a laptop on the beach. The only hindrance is not being able to see the screen in the sun – believe me I’ve tried it! With today’s technology and our reliance on resources like email, cloud computing and social media, virtual teams are a viable option for many businesses. It is just a matter of getting your head around the idea and understanding how it works. Remember, most teams are dispersed in some way, whether on different floors in an office building or at various branches around the world. So running a virtual team is not really that different. The success factor comes down to communication, team cohesiveness and common goals.
Autumn 2012
Creating a virtual team
One factor to remember is that creating a virtual team is very different to simply outsourcing a task. There may be tasks that lend themselves to general outsourcing but if you are creating an empire you must have solid teams to achieve results. Team building activities have been around for years and for good reason. Aligning a team with the company brand and an engaging staff as a whole, has proven time and time again to be a positive investment in the bottom line. So, what are some of the important considerations in implementing a virtual team?
1. Have an overall strategy
As with any business, strategy is key. Know where you are going, what you are trying to achieve and why you are trying to achieve it. Map out requirements, outcome and skills required and design your virtual strategy with goals in mind. First, write down all functions performed in your business and who performs them. Next, check off which of these functions are repetitive and can be systemised? Which
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ones need human creativity and face-toface contact to flourish and what skills are required? Often this process alone is enlightening, especially when you have been so busy running the business that you haven’t taken a bird’s eye view. Use this opportunity as a chance to streamline company operations and clean out the dead wood.
2. Create strong systems and procedures
Virtual teams need explicit instructions -- the clearer the systems the less chance for miscommunication. This can happen for any team, whether it is centrally located or virtual. Even if your virtual team member is two doors down the road it is still important to have clear systems. In virtual teams you don’t have the ability to look over shoulders and check that your staff is on track, so it is essential that requirements are detailed up front with appropriate milestones put in place.
3. Mix it up and focus on strengths
Consider the whole project before employing staff. For example, repetitive tasks can be performed by either local or offshore virtual staff depending on their skills and strengths. More complex projects can be performed by local team members working virtually, in the office, or both. Simple jobs can be awarded
Marketing | business
via crowdsourcing sites (try freelancer. com, designcrowd.com, crowdspring. com), where workers from all over the world compete or bid for the job. A word of warning here – you really do get what you pay for. The lure of cheap overseas labour can sometimes be outweighed by a lack of understanding about your business and what you are trying to achieve. Try vadirectory.net for virtual assistants in Australia or put a call out on LinkedIn. If you must go overseas then ODesk.com or elance.com are worth a look. Be very specific in your brief when you post a project and start with small one off jobs to uncover the gems! Once you find a person who delivers what you want then you can invite them specifically for future jobs and train them to be part of your team. Virtual teams are utilised in both corporate Australia as well as businesses large and small. One company that shows an effective virtual strategy is Lenovo. Danielle Uskovic, Environment & Social Media Manager, works from her home office most days. This flexibility allows her to manage her young family whilst still being an effective team member. “The option to work remotely increases employee efficiency, provides a higher level of work life balance and there is a cost reduction for the company. The environmental benefit is that individuals cut down their carbon footprint by being able to work from home and the business cuts down its carbon footprint by leasing smaller workspaces. It really is a win/win scenario”, says Danielle.
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4. Provide strong communication channels
Set up your team for success from the start. Begin with an agreed trial period first. At the end of this trial period give AND receive constructive feedback and make a plan to move forward or part ways amicably. Then, if you are moving forward, decide on a method and frequency of contact that works for both of you. In virtual teams, trust is built over time and through reliable contact and delivery. This goes both ways. Managers who pick up the phone and talk to their staff will add a personal side to the relationship that email just can’t achieve. Just as you would walk around the office and chat to staff in an office, there is no reason why your virtual staff cannot share the same connection.
Moreover, ask your team for feedback, encourage contribution and consider providing a forum for discussion amongst team members, whether that is online or face-to-face. (Listen to your team --you never know where that next big idea will come from!) The value of face-to-face connections cannot be underestimated. Getting everyone together for a meeting, or an event, is extraordinarily valuable to any team. Even if only an annual event, the benefits will far outweigh the costs. Kate Tribe, Director of Tribe Research has tried both virtual and co-located teams. She has employed some virtual staff on and off since 2008 and has regularly worked from home herself, since 2002. She is now employing a completely virtual team. Kate’s strategy is that most of her team will be Sydney-based so that she can have regular face-to-face catch-ups. The rest will be further afield but she plans to connect via regular Skype calls. Skype.com is free for Skype to Skype calls and allows the user to host a video call from anywhere in the world. Kate uses Skype to keep in touch, calling for a check-in chat each day and using the share desktop feature for training. All advisory board meetings are also handled via a group Skype call. “There is more respect for people’s time in a virtual team and communication is planned rather than unplanned. It isn’t about switching on at 9 and off at 5”, says Kate. When conflicts arise, listen first and speak later. As with any form of conflict management, hearing both sides is paramount to resolution. Solid relationships at the beginning and strong systems will go a long way in minimising conflict. Address problems quickly before they have an opportunity to escalate.
5. Utilise today’s technology
Although virtual team members may be dispersed, they should not be invisible. Providing a sense of purpose for the project, explaining how each task fits in to a common goal, will allow a virtual team to
soar. Utilise today’s technology to create a space filled with people, not just email addresses. Aside from email, there are many useful solutions to coordinate virtual staff. For example, a Wiki is highly useful for online collaboration, Google Docs allows a number of people to collaborate on a single document, while cloud based software allows access to centralised files from anywhere. Kate Tribe uses SugarCRM to manage projects and assign tasks – eliminating the need for lots of emails. Procedures are on a Wiki that everyone can update and use. A file server with VPN access is used rather than emailing files around and generating duplicates. Like Skype, Gotomeeting.com allows you to conduct meetings with the added benefit of recording. This is a great way to create training videos that show staff how to use software, create documents or anything else computer based. Vimeo.com can then host password-protected video with cloud access or use the html to place video on to your company Intranet or Wiki (try wikispaces.com). The prevalence of virtual teams will only continue to rise. Cost considerations, flexibility requirements and efficiency render virtual teams an essential part of business in the current landscape. With proper planning and attention the virtual team can become a highly successful and effective component of any business strategy. Maybe one day they’ll even come up with a super laptop screen for the beach! Resources and references Skype.com SugarCRM.com Gotomeeting.com Freelancer.com Designcrowd.com Crowdspring.com Odesk.com Teleworkaustralia.com.au Google.com/Apps Linkedin.com Vadirectory.net Wikispaces.com Elance.com
Kim McGuinness is founder of Network Central and networkingmentor.com.au. Kim has been MC at hundreds of events and has interviewed and presented hundreds of inspiring leaders and educators over the last 15 years. Kim co-runs a yearly Mentor Program and has developed training programs and conference presentations for many blue chip clients.
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www.empoweronline.com.au
business | Success profile
A passionShoes for Jodie Fox of Shoes of Prey shares how a discussion with two friends on a couch became a multi-million dollar business, allowing anyone to design their own bespoke shoe and meeting the needs of shoe fanatics across the world. Q. Tell us a bit about yourself. A. I’m co-founder of Shoes of Prey, a
website where women can design their own shoes and Sneaking Duck, an online optical fashion retailer. My role in each is to focus on communications, marketing and product development. Along with the successes of both businesses to date, I am lucky enough to be the national winner of the Telstra businesswoman of the year, Hudson corporate and private award.
Q. What were you doing before you commenced Shoes of Prey? A. A banking and finance lawyer by trade,
I’d actually always thought I would be a dancer. However, 30 minutes before university preference lodgement closed, I shifted my successful audition for dance to position two and law to number one. After completing a dual degree in law and international business I went on to become an insolvency litigator followed by a short stint in securitisation. The work was incredible but my heart wasn’t in it. After interrogating myself about what I wanted and numerous discussions with friends and family about the industries they worked in, I pursued a successful career in advertising. All the while I became addicted to commissioning my own shoe designs and as girlfriends saw my creations, I began to commission designs on their behalf.
Q. How did the decision to start the business come about? A. I had met Co-founders
Mike and Michael at law school. Like me, they weren’t destined for the
courtroom. After short stints in the legal profession they both started working for Google, Mike as a software engineer and Michael in the advertising team of Google, Sydney. We had always talked business together and sitting on our couch one night they hit upon my passion for bespoke shoes. We all agreed there was a gap in the Australian market and subsequently, Shoes of Prey was born on 8 October 2009 – the first to market globally with this concept.
Q. Tell us a bit about Shoes of Prey. A. Shoes of Prey is a website where women
can design their own shoes. A suite of divine raw materials and an array of candy-store colours await the most vivid imagination and make for hours of shoe-designing bliss. Possibilities include flats and heel heights from a comfortable one and a half inch heel to the truly glamour-zonian four and a half inch heel. The current range offers more than 4 trillion combinations and is constantly updated. Once a design is completed, we rush it to our technicians who hand-make the shoes, swaddle them in a soft dust bag, place them into a crisp new box and promptly ship them to our happy customers. Being a bespoke service, it’s about fit as much as it’s about fashion. We provide a wide range of sizes, adjust for widths and can even make one shoe bigger than the other.
Q. What type and how much research did you undertake before starting the business? A. Prior to
starting Shoes of Prey we
Autumn 2012
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prepared a business plan and considered things such as: who we believed our customer was, market size, competition, strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats. We researched and met with numerous possible suppliers, worked on models for the supply chain, researched and developed concepts for the designer and how it might be executed and determined how we would get the message out.
Q. Tell us about the growth of Shoes of Prey from selling your first pair of bespoke shoes to today. A. Since the day we opened our doors in October 2009, we have become a global, multi-million dollar enterprise with 19 staff and 6 offices around the world. Women have spent more than 20 million minutes designing millions of shoes with us.
Q. What were the early days like in the business? While no doubt you were confident about the potential success of the business there must also have been times of doubt. A. Although entrepreneurs are traditionally a very optimistic bunch, we never take anything for granted. We monitored and measured every event and always
Success profile | business
found something new to try if the previous attempt hadn’t hit the goal we were after. Doubts do creep in because it’s a long journey and the lows can be excruciating but we’re lucky to be a team of three and so we’re able to pull each other through the challenging times.
aren’t always able to. The challenges largely lie in time differences, and finding ways to ensure that we communicate everything across offices. As a small business, things often happen very quickly and we have to remember to keep everyone abreast of news.
Q. Did everyone support you right from the start or were friends/family cautious? How did you overcome the doubters? A. I think everyone was happy for us to try
Q. You have an amazing customised website. Tell us about your digital/web strategy? A. From the outset, we looked to create
something, but weren’t overly optimistic for us. We all had successful career paths laid out in front of us and as none of our parents had ever attempted the entrepreneur game, I can understand the doubts they harboured. We never really overcame our doubters; we just didn’t allow them to prevent us from pursuing the idea.
Q. What was your biggest challenge when starting the business? A. There were many challenges starting
the business. Perhaps the first one was simply launching the site, despite the fact we weren’t 100% ready! That was my first lesson – to do things before I am ready so I don’t lose momentum and opportunity.
Q. How have you funded your business? A. The founders provided the seed capital. Now, we’re bootstrapped, and profitable.
Photos courtesy of Shoes of prey
Q. Tell us about working with an international team. What have been the challenges and how have you dealt with them? A. It’s been really exciting to work with an international team. The blessing is that they bring incredible insights to our business, both locally, and globally by being able to see things with fresh eyes in a way we
something that would lend itself to being shared - something that would be of interest to people and pull them to our website. We were looking for a “purple cow” as Seth Godin would put it. We still do this with every part of our business – our packaging, our customer service – everything.
Q. As the business has grown, how have you needed to grow personally? A. It’s a big challenge to go from three
people on the couch to a team of 19. One of the many things I’ve had to learn is people management and this requires a reasonable amount of personal development! I have also learnt what it means to be the boss – whether that’s about managing my personal reactions to things or listening well. I need to in a way that ensures staff are inspired.
Q. You’ve had some great success in the media. What has been your PR and marketing approach? Have you worked with an agency or done this yourself? A. We’ve done most of our PR and
marketing in house, but started to outsource late last year. We’ve always been big believers in word-of-mouth so all of our work uses the effect on this as a litmus test.
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Q. One of your partners is now your husband. How have you managed to separate work from life? A. It’s really tricky and we’re still learning
everyday. The one thing that we have learnt is not to replace our relationship with the business; no matter how big and busy things get. Always remain tender with one another and don’t harden into business partners. That one night a week that you do ‘date night’ is more important than you can imagine. Plan it and don’t ever cancel, as compromising important life events is a very slippery slope.
Q. What are you most proud of in your achievement to date? A. This question definitely took me
the longest to answer! Appearing in Oprah Magazine? Winning Telstra Businesswoman of the Year, Hudson Corporate/Private award? There are many great moments to pick from. However it’s one of the daily ones that gives me the greatest rush of pride. We often receive emails from customers telling us that their shoes made their day; that they put them on and felt sensational. I still feel fantastic every time we receive one of these emails and I’m proud that we’re doing what we set out to do, which is to help women to fully and confidently express their own style by designing their own shoes.
Q. What advice do you have for other women starting out in business? A. It’s always the same three things: • Do everything before you’re ready – if you’re 100% ready, it’s probably too late. • All you need to do is make a decision and see what happens – no “what ifs”, no planning and dreaming to the point of inaction. • Believe passionately in what you are doing. The highs are amazing but the lows are excruciating and you’re passion will pull you through anything.
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oxy Lady is Australia’s only women’s speaker bureau and our speakers, consultants, trainers and coaches are all experts in their chosen field. As you will see featured on these two pages, our professionals can educate on a range of topics including business, leadership, social media, marketing, sales, communication, motivation, mentoring, digital strategy, sustainability, networking, team building, health, entrepreneurship, training, Do-ityourself workshops and a vast range of other topics. Each one of these professionals offer a wealth of information to share with you and to find out more just visit their profiles on the Voxy Lady website. To make them easy to find we have created a link for ‘Featured Speakers’ on the homepage! As well, you will find articles written by many of our speakers on the website. Voxy Lady supports both corporates and associations and we are advocates for small business growth. We invite you to select your next speaker from our list of professionals. To book your speaker please call me directly on 0414 729 646, email bookings@voxylady.com.au or visit www.voxylady.com.au I look forward to hearing from you.
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Deb Carr Managing Director
career | Gender Diversity
&then
Now Fiona Anson outlines the main features of the Australian Bureau of Statistics Now and Then – 50 Years of the Labour Force Report showing a move to flexible working arrangements.
I
t’s safe to say that, in the last fifty years, Australia has seen a growth in the number of women in the workforce. The ideal of the ‘50s and ‘60s stay-at-home mum has gone by the wayside and now it’s visions of Sarah Jessica Parker, like her character in the recent movie “I Don’t Know How She Does It” – carefully balancing a child on one hip and holding a briefcase on the other – that typifies most women. It’s no secret that women’s participation in the labour force has almost doubled since those times in the ‘60s. In fact, there are roughly one million more women in the workforce than there were just 10 years ago and the recent release of the Australian Bureau of Statistics, Now and Then – 50 Years of the Labour Force Report highlights a number of other changes affecting the workforce and, in particular, women. On top of this, the report highlights the changes in traditional male/female roles over the last fifty years. The traditional male breadwinner arrangements have declined since the 1960s, and now both partners of couple families are likely to be employed. Women, in particular, have moved in large numbers to roles that have been traditionally held by men, especially in the white collar sector. One trend that has been highlighted by the ABS as most pertinent is the move to part time employment by women. Not so
Autumn 2012
long ago, the ABS were sprouting that 47% of all women in the workforce were in part time jobs. Now they say it’s 75%. Released in December, the report also notes that it’s not just women making the move to flexible work. In recent years, there has been a substantial increase in the proportion of men working part time as well. While part-time work for younger men, particularly those studying, is not uncommon, what is of note is the growth of part time for men in the older age demographic. Just two years ago, a quarter of men in the 55-59 age bracket intended to move to part-time work rather than retiring completely. Now the numbers are even higher – and growing. So what’s behind it all? Why the move for both men and women to part time? Well, it was only a little over a decade ago that we were all embracing the “greed is good” mentality of the ‘90s but, with the dawn of a new century came the dawn of a new philosophy. Work / Life balance is fast becoming – if not already – the catch cry of the 21st century. In fact, you now can’t pick up a weekend newspaper without seeing a number of articles about how to achieve it. Part time in all its forms – whether that’s contract, casual, temp, flexible hours or the traditional “less than 40 hours a week” definition - is quickly becoming more mainstream every month. Nearly twenty years ago, when my son was a baby, the options just didn’t seem to be there. You chose to stay at home or be a working mum – but that is changing – and changing fast. There’s a plethora or choices available to workers these days and all are becoming accepted as mainstream. The growth of part time is evidenced in almost every industry in the country. Interestingly, almost half the jobs created in the past 20 years have been part-time, with 95 per cent of those in service industries.
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Add to that the introduction of more paid leave entitlements and the options expand even further. In the past, most of us had to weigh up the viability of the length of time we worked while pregnant or to care for others against the time we could afford to take off work unpaid. Now all that’s changing too. From having very few options 50 years ago, we now have a suite of paid leave entitlements available from personal carer’s leave to maternity/paternity/adoption leave. These new entitlement payments, in many cases, all form part of the familyfriendly leave provisions that help parents and families juggle paid work and family responsibilities. The latest in this raft has been the national Paid Parental Leave scheme that was introduced in January 2011. Other recent changes include the Fair Work Act, 2009, which effectively gives parents and other people caring for young children the right to make formal requests for flexible work arrangements. But it’s not just workers who are benefitting from this change in thinking and philosophy. For business owners, the acceptance of flexible working arrangements as a legitimate work solution allows them to operate more cost effectively by replacing full-time positions with part-time or seasonal workers as well as allowing them more work/life balance by removing some of the financial obligations that come with employing full time staff. Flexible work arrangements, for employers, mean that they some of the financial pressure of having to pay wages and the associated on costs when business is in a quiet part of their cycle. Plus, there is a host of proven benefits to hiring casual or part time staff such as reduced staff turnover, lower absenteeism, higher productivity, happier staff - the list goes on!
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Gender Diversity | career
And while, traditionally, a business owner had to employ a full timer to get a quality skill set, that’s all changing too. There’s a goldmine of talent in the pool of part-time workers that, until recently, many companies haven’t recognized but there’s a dawning in many minds that the skills of the part-time workforce are grossly underestimated. Company managers, CEOs, top-drawer PAs and highly-skilled IT people are among some of the skilled job seekers looking for work to fit around their family responsibilities and many business owners now recognize that they can take advantage of what’s out there. In fact, part-time positions tend to attract a higher level of skills because there is an army of mature, well-qualified people with strong work ethics and fantastic experience who will work hard for the right opportunity. Tap into the highly qualified market of graduate mothers who had highpowered jobs before children, offer them part-time and flexible working, and you may be richly rewarded. And it’s certainly not just working mums who make up the talent pool. Thanks to the GFC and the erosion of many superannuation fund balances, the baby boomers who saw retirement on the horizon are now staying in the workforce by choosing to move to part time rather than retiring altogether. With many of them having 30, 40 and 50 years experience within industries and roles – that’s experience that you just can’t put a price on. Coupled with that is the overall improving health of the over 50s. With 50 being the new 40 – and 60 being the
new 50 – the philosophy that you were “put out to pasture” at 65 is becoming a myth. These generations are reliable and knowledgeable – and they still have enthusiasm in bucket loads, however, they’ve also discovered the concept of work / life balance and the importance of it. Business coaches and lifestyle coaches know all about these trend – in fact, it’s probably fair to say that it underpins a vast majority of the work they do. People are looking for that illusive balance of family and work – and often need help to make the transition. While options available for work have also seen some changes over the past few years, and with family-friendly leave provisions, affordable child care and flexible hours top the list for working mums and dads, emerging mobile technologies have seen a rise in work-from-home positions which is now becoming more and more of an option for business owners and employees alike. A few years ago, we all had to go into the office to get access to equipment and information, now all that’s available via the Internet. With more and more businesses storing documents in “the Cloud” as well as running systems remotely through it, working from home is now becoming a preferred – and available - option for many. While the ABS’ Labour Report doesn’t specifically highlight technology, the changes that are coming due to this simply cannot be ignored. The changes in technology has also seen a new industry burgeoning – that of the Virtual Assistant. VAs have been around for a while but they’re quickly becoming mainstream.
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Outsourcing everything from general admin tasks to IT needs is a growth industry. New businesses are springing up in surprising numbers solely focused on providing outsourced contractors for your needs. On the home front, the move to outsourcing is also picking up momentum with personal concierge services also on the rise enabling us to outsource some of the more mundane tasks in our lives so that we spend more time with family and friends. For those of us who choose part time – be it in our own businesses or as an employee - the news that job flexibility is on the increase is great news. And for employers, the ability to allow employees to work from home gives them access to a group of highly valuable people who, in the past, have found it hard to move back into the workforce. These two things combined have opened up the floodgates to a talent pool for employers to get the people they need, when they need them. Full time, nine-to-five and office bound is far from the only option anymore and that means work/life balance is finally within reach for many more Australians. Fiona Anson is a “serial entrepreneur” having owned her own businesses for over twenty years. She is a qualified Accountant and experienced marketer. Fiona is the Co-Founder and Director of part time job website HireMeUp.com.au and is a published author of three business books. She is a Board Member of the Professional Coaches Network. www.hiremeup.com.au
www.empoweronline.com.au
career | Feature
&
Mirroring
matching Rapport is the foundation to all successful relationships. Kathy McKenzie explains a simple Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) practice to help you connect with more people.
H
ave you ever been part of a meeting or project where you were connecting well with most people but found there was one person you just didn’t “click” with. It’s likely you had no rapport with that person. Rapport is a curious phenomenon that is defined in google as “A close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned, understand each other’s feelings or ideas and communicate well.” So what do we do when we are not getting that sense of harmony? What do we do when there is not that understanding of the other person’s feelings and ideas? Is it possible to build rapport with the person who seems prickly or unreachable? Fortunately like so many of the complex components of communication when you break the process of rapport apart, there are some key areas that, if you can focus on and develop, will ensure you build harmony with almost anyone. One of these key components is matching and mirroring the other person. Matching and mirroring was recognised as having immense power through studying exceptional communicators in the 1970s such as Milton Erickson (considered the father of hypnotherapy), Virginia Satir (an amazing family therapist with incredible skills) and Gregory Bateson (a Linguist in the 1970s). The developers of NLP looked at these experts and by studying their neurology, or patterns of thinking, their language patterns, and the internal unconscious programs, established a model for the foundations of communication excellence. Matching and mirroring is recognised as a key factor that they demonstrated when establishing rapport with people who others had given up on because they were so challenging to get along with. Matching is literally doing exactly as the other person does. For example if they tilt their head to the right you do too. On the other hand, mirroring would be doing the opposite of what the other person does as if they were looking in a mirror. For example, if they tilt to the right you would tilt to the left. It is worth stressing that building rapport in this way must be done subtly. If it comes to the person’s conscious attention that you are utilising these techniques it can make them feel manipulated or mimicked which is not what we want. When applying this technique the first aspects to pay attention to are language and body posture. To mirror and match language notice the sensory representation that someone is using. Words like
Autumn 2012
‘see’, ‘imagine’ and ‘look’ relate to visual processing. If the person use words or phrases such as ‘that rings a bell’, ‘listen’ or ‘sounds good’, this indicates auditory processing. Kinaesthetic processing can be recognised by the use of words or phrases such as ‘I feel’, ‘get a grip’, ‘I sensed you didn’t agree’. As an example, consider that you and a colleague are discussing a new project and your colleague uses language such as ‘that’s not clear to me’, ‘I can’t see what you mean’, ‘that seems a bit hazy’. This would indicate a visual preference in their style of communication. To gain rapport with them it would be useful to adapt your own language to align to their preference. Try this little exercise in matching and mirroring. Find a person you wish to have more rapport with. Pay close attention to what predicates they are using in their communication (visual, auditory or kinaesthetic) and see if you can adapt your language patterns to include more of those. It may be you need to slow down your rate of speech, or change your sensory channel from kinesthetic to visual. Notice how the person responds when you match them? At the same time match your body posture to theirs. For example tilt your head in the same direction, poisition your hands in the same place and generally stand or sit the same. Reflect on this exercise and whether it was easy for you or not. Rapport is the foundation to all successful relationships so if you are willing to be a bit flexible and pay attention to some aspects that previously were not on your radar, those challenging people may not be so challenging in the future. Kathy McKenzie - Director FIREUP Coaching an RTO, Director Brand Development ICF Board & leading contributor to the coaching profession. She developed & trains a Certificate IV in Business and Personal Coaching and is a popular keynote speaker.
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career | Feature
style?
What’s your
influencing
From the simplest task of resolving a misunderstanding with a colleague, to more complex tasks like negotiating the terms of a deal, we all use a variety of communication strategies to influence the people around us every day.
M
aybe there’s someone you would like to be more influential with (a boss, an interviewer, an employee, a parent, a teenager) or maybe you would just like to be more influential in your life generally. When it comes to careers, we know for sure, from the wide variety of studies on influence in the workplace since the 1960s, that influencing skills are integral to good leadership. Regardless of whether you are the team member managing upwards, the team leader managing your team or even a sole trader tasked with managing both, when you need to get people to do something for you or agree with your assertions it is preferable to rely on strong influencing skills than on your authority alone. What descriptors come to mind when you hear the word ‘influence’? Are they words like arouse, charm, tempt, entice, cajole, shape, force, negotiate, brainwash, manipulate, impress, incite, convince, lead, persuade, sell, woo, urge, inspire, sway, transform? How many of these words do you see as positive or negative? These are all value-laden words that may affect your view of what is desirable influencing and what is overstepping the line into the realm of unethical manipulating or misuse of power. Have you ever wondered whether successful influencers are born or made? Is there a proven formula for being influential that can be learnt? Should everybody therefore strive to influence in the same way? Or, does everyone have a natural influencing style? If so, can we change the
Autumn 2012
way we communicate so that we become more influential?
Influencing styles
Some people by virtue of their personality are naturally active influencers. They are driven to communicate, network, lobby, propose, canvas support, and ‘play the politics’ in the workplace in order to ‘get their way’ or have their ideas adopted. Others are not so naturally inclined. Interestingly, the overt ‘push’ style influencing of the former is not always the most effective. Rather, the subtler, ‘pull’ styles of influencing can be more effective in certain situations. In general, your degree of influence depends on your approach to communication and the way you interact with others. Therefore people tend to develop established ways of communicating for achieving their dayto-day needs. In other words, we all have a preferred style of influencing. The good news is that everybody can modify or adapt the way they communicate to become more influential. Most influencing styles models refer not to personality traits but to patterns of behaviour. So you can change your influence style by consciously and routinely practicing new communication behaviours. Models of influencing styles can be useful for increasing our awareness of the influencing behaviours we tend to use and for appreciating the influencing style of others. There are almost as many influencing styles testing instruments as personality testing instruments. This is one that I use:
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The 7 I-Styles
The 7 I-Styles model is an empirically based influencing styles model to demonstrate the way personality impacts your influencing style. With almost two decades of experience as a presentation and influencing skills trainer and mentor I have found seven common influencing styles: 1. The Preacher – prefers to command respect and following by espousing a set of highly held values and beliefs. 2. The Manager – prefers to communicate objectives, gains ‘buy-in’, monitors performance and provides feedback as a way harnessing effort. 3. The Friend – prefers to gain support by being valued as a friend, and by being people-centred, collaborative and an active listener. 4. The Visionary – prefers to communicate a rich and desirable picture of the future of which others cannot help but want to be a part. 5. The Rationalist – prefers to use data, analysis, logic and rational argument to convince others. 6. The Bureaucrat – prefers to use formal authority and organisational structures as a way of building legitimate power. 7. The Teacher – prefers to encourage personal and professional development through exposing people to new ideas, perspectives and possibilities. Rather than lock people into a particular style, the purpose of the 7 I-Styles Model is to highlight the different approaches to influencing. In fact, most people would see themselves as adopting a mix of two or more styles. Indeed, you may decide that you would like to pursue a particular style not natural or easy for you because it is more appealing than your current approach.
Becoming more influential
The effectiveness of any influencing style will obviously depend on the situation. For instance, the culture of an organisation, the personalities involved, the way they make
Feature | career
decisions and their view of their own expertise and that of the person they are attempting to influence all impact on how influential a given style will be. Regardless of your preferred style influencing skills can definitely be developed. I recently worked with the CEO of the Australian arm of an international company who had been lobbying unsuccessfully for three years to close one of the branch offices as a way of improving the financial performance of the company. After learning a number of new influencing skills relevant to the level of board presentation, he received the board approval that he needed on the spot. I have also worked with many technologyfocused clients pitching for multi-million dollar projects where those involved would certainly not describe themselves as ‘people people’. Yet once they learnt the simple steps to influencing they too have won their bids. In order to improve your power to influence you must appreciate that not everyone will be influenced by the same things and in the same way you are. It is critical then, to learn ways of flexing or adapting your influencing style to suit the needs and decision-making behaviour of your stakeholder. As well, it’s close to impossible to influence others based only on an understanding of I-Styles. If you are serious about increasing your chances of hearing the word ‘yes’ then you must also seek to develop specific influencing skills in your influence toolkit.
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Top influencing tips
1. Build your credibility over time: Your personal credibility has a significant impact on your degree of influence. Your credibility is determined by such things as your self-confidence, presence, charisma, experience, work networks and skill level. Solid credibility gives you a solid foundation on which to plan an influential
communication strategy. 2. Be connected: Be clear in your mind about the basis on which there is the potential for a connection between you and the people you would like to influence. In other words, why do others need what you have to offer or why should they change in the way you would like? What is the strategic value of what you have to offer? Apart from anything else, if you are really clear about this you will have more success in matching your influencing style to the situation. 3. Build rapport: Zig Ziglar famously said: “They don’t care what you know until they know how much you care”. Work on your rapport-building skills because others cannot be persuaded unless they feel an affinity with you. Rapport is about, trust, a common connection, mutual understanding and a functional relationship in which both parties feel at ease. Rapportbuilding is a science and there is much to learn for those to whom it does not come naturally. 4. Be assertive: Powerful influencing requires a high degree of assertiveness. In the 21st century people are much less likely to allow people with authority to dictate. Yet an unassertive person will not be heard in our increasingly competitive world. So, communicate your needs or position in a clear, direct and concise way whilst being sure to show respect for the position and feelings of others. 5. Develop persuasive language: Language is a powerful tool in your influence toolkit. Learn how to use linguistic
devices such as: alliteration; anaphora; tricolon; epistrophe; power words; and joining words to increase your influence. 6. Use social Influence: Take time to understand and apply Cialdini’s six principles of social influence: 1. Social Proof – we look to what others do to guide our behaviour. 2. Reciprocity – we feel obligated to return favours performed for us. 3. Commitment and Consistency – we want to act consistently with our commitments and values. 4. Authority – we look to experts to show us the way. 5. Scarcity – the less available the resource, the more we want it. 6. Liking – the more we like people the more we want to say yes to them. There are a variety of approaches to influencing worth learning and trying throughout your day at work. Remember, it doesn’t matter how good your company is, how good your products or service are, how good your ideas are or how good your message is if no one’s listening. Influencing techniques will help you ensure your message is heard and will increase your chances you hear the word ‘yes’ more often in your life.
Michelle Bowden is one of only 25 female CSPs in Australia (the highest designation for conference speakers in the world). She’s also a 4-time nominee for the Educator Award for Excellence and the author of Don’t Picture me Naked – how to present your ideas and influence people using techniques that actually work. www.michellebowden.com.au
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www.empoweronline.com.au
career | Feature
Time to
“friend” social media
Ever thought of using social media to find a new job? Kate Southam explains this powerful avenue and how you can use it to your advantage.
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hen I mention the words “social media” as a job tool to audiences I often see shoulders sag and hear a collective sigh. I agree it’s hard to keep up with changing technologies and find time to tweet, update Facebook, and create and maintain professional social profiles. However, shunning this fast growing medium as a career tool could mean missing out on new and exciting work opportunities. According to a 2011Jobvite® survey, nearly two-thirds of US employers have made successful hires using social media. In Australia, 21 of the top 200 ASX-listed companies had used LinkedIn recruitment services by mid-2011. And, Deloitte Australia has been using Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube to promote its jobs for much longer than that.
can apply maximum privacy settings to a personal profile while inviting work friends to connect with via BeKnown. Twitter launched in mid-2006 as a microblogging site allowing people to post messages of no more than 140 characters, known as “tweets”. Twitter is now a popular promotion tool for businesses, everyday people, and the famous. Michelle Obama started tweeting in January 2012, gaining 100,000 followers within hours. Husband Barak Obama has 11 million plus. LinkedIn launched in 2003 as a social media tool for business people. You can create a professional profile, post recommendations for the work of others or ask for recommendations, start or take part in discussion groups, send messages to people about work, and search for listed jobs.
Who’s who in social media
How to apply for jobs
Launched in 2004, Facebook has 800 million users. While still the place to create a personal profile, Facebook has also become a storefront for large and small companies. Using Facebook to promote jobs has really taken off in the last two years. BeKnown, a free Facebook app developed by job board Monster, launched in mid-2011. BeKnown was developed to enable users to create a personal and a professional profile on the Facebook platform but keep the two separate. Users Autumn 2012
Application methods vary. Many companies will use Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn to promote a link to a job ad hosted on a job board or their company website. Once you click on that link, you could be asked to send a cover letter and résumé or fill in an online form. Some
companies also create games to recruit people, or enable you to invite them to view your online profile. With this in mind it obviously becomes very important to have a strong and respectable profile.
Getting started
A great success strategy is to ask a trusted contact/friend well versed in social media to share their knowledge. There are also online video tutorials as well as instructions on the various platforms. Perform a “vanity” search on your name using Google and Bing to see what is out there about you. Look for places you’ve been mentioned on websites, but also look at any photos and videos on other people’s Facebook profiles that “tag” (name) you. Request to be detagged from anything unflattering. Turn up the privacy settings on your personal Facebook page if you want to keep it hidden from employers. Think twice before inviting colleagues to be your “friend” on Facebook. I’ve heard from people reprimanded for moaning about work on Facebook because they forgot they had “friended” a colleague or manager. When creating a LinkedIn or BeKnown profile, don’t exaggerate or be overly modest. Your profile is an online business card, so use it wisely. Be selective when inviting people to connect with you. Also, when you have just been interviewed for a job, you might look like a stalker if you then send a connection request. Make sure all your information is current and consistent, whether in a résumé posted on a job board, a bio on an employer site, or membership page or your LinkedIn or BeKnown profile. Update your profiles regularly. This is especially important for those already employed. And remember, your employer “owns” its computer servers, so any updates performed at work are not necessarily private. Use your smart phone or homebased computer.
Kate Southam is an employment/careers writer, blogger, and speaker. Kate is the founding editor of CareerOne.com.au, a syndicated newspaper columnist, and author of the Cube Farmer blog on news.com.au. She has a weekly spot on 2UE and makes regular television appearances including Seven’s Morning Show, Today Tonight, and Nine’s TODAY programs. 34
you | Feature
Pleasure and
achievement
An intriguing new book, called ‘When Happiness is not Enough’ by clinical psychologist Chris Skellett, provides a crystal clear model of how to live a fulfilling life.
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ccording to Chris, the simple formula for a fulfilling life is provided by balancing the drive to achieve personal goals with openness to the sensual experience of pleasure. In a thought provoking, engaging style, Chris invites us all to consider whether we carry a personal preference for Pleasure or Achievement. Do we value the pleasure of the moment, or the satisfaction of achieving stated goals? Do we remember the good times we’ve had, or the things that we have achieved? Do we focus on the ultimate goal, or do we enjoy the journey? In order to live a fulfilling life, it is suggested that we need to strike a considered balance between the experience of pleasure (laughter, fun, and sensory indulgence) and satisfaction and pride through the achievement of personal goals. The book categorises a number of clinical problems with reference to this model - the ‘Pleasure Achievement Principle’. Obesity, drug and alcohol use, depression and a range of self-control issues are all based on an excessive focus on indulgent pleasure at the expense of an achievement orientation. Conversely, stress, obsessive drive, anger and many anxiety states are all based upon an excessive drive to achieve certain objectives, at the expense of enjoyment and accepting life for what it is. ‘Driven’ characters tend to take their pleasures in an unhealthy way. They chase quick, meaningless highs that add no value to their lives. They are drawn towards short term pleasures with longer term costs to their selfesteem, their finances, and their health. The self-help literature is full of suggestions as to how to find happiness. Mindfulness, Buddhism, and many alternative healing models promote ‘awareness of the moment’ as the key to
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happiness. Other motivational books will suggest that happiness is to be found by striving to achieve your goals, whether financial, educational, or physical. Most coaching programmes will tend to emphasise one or the other as the primary route to personal fulfilment. But clearly, both factors are important. ‘When Happiness is not Enough’ sits astride both self-help camps, and suggests that a truly fulfilling life is experienced by balancing pleasure in the moment with satisfaction through achieving life goals. The key question that the book asks its readers is: “Do we need to tighten up and set specific goals, or do we need to loosen up and relax?” The book provides a great balance of theory and practical applications of the model. It reviews how culture, social pressure and family values can shape our preferences. It also reviews how the Pleasure Achievement Principle might play out over the course of our lives. For example, students struggle with balancing study with their social life. Young parents struggle with the demands of parenting while having no time for themselves. And older adults approaching retirement need to plan whether their future happiness is to be based on cruises and chardonnay, or voluntary work and purposeful roles in the community. At each stage, it is clear that happiness means different things to different people, and that finding a personally fulfilling balance is important for us all. Perhaps the key insights from the book come from three chapters that review one’s current lifestyle. A pie chart is broken into three pieces: Work, Home and Leisure. The Work segment of ones life is obviously focussed on Achievement, but it is important that we also enjoy what we do, and that we find ways to create a culture of fun and engagement with the culture.
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Analysing workplace culture is a fascinating exercise, where we compare the plusses and minuses of a ‘cruisy’ work life with the stressful demands of a ‘driven’ culture. The book offers several ideas as to how to enhance workplace satisfaction, and how to build a sense of pleasure into the most dysfunctional of work environments. The book also reviews issues of poor motivation, burnout, procrastination, and stress against the Pleasure Achievement Principle, and gives practical suggestions as to how to pull oneself back into balance. The ‘leadership challenge’ of engaging with employees is also considered. So often, leaders come up with a great vision, but then cannot engage or promote ‘buy-in’ to their plan. ‘Engagement’ happens when we stop, celebrate and affirm simply being together, not when we are rushing forwards towards excitable goals. The chapter that applies the Principle to our Home life reviews our family relationships, and asks us to consider whether we are living together simply because we enjoy each other’s company, or whether we are hoping to achieve common objectives. Many couples are drawn together to improve their wealth, social status and general standing in the community. Others are simply happy to enjoy life together as it is. Families can either encourage and value success in their children, or else simply affirm them for who they are, regardless of what they have achieved. Family photos can show Johnny with his face planted endearingly in the porridge, or can show him holding up the winning trophy at school sports day. Is the family emphasis on fun and pleasure…or pride and success? A wonderful vignette for domestic tension is provided where ’Mr Pleasure’ is to be found lying on the couch in the sun on a Saturday morning, reading a
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magazine, drinking coffee, and listening to a CD. ‘Mrs Achievement’ arrives in the room, not knowing where to start, with cleaning, washing and ironing all on her list of things to do. She also worries that the lawns need mowing, and there are people coming over later for a meal. After a meal, he will relax before doing the dishes. She will do the dishes and then relax. She scowls at Mr Pleasure as a lazy good for nothing, while he gazes balefully back at her as pressured and stressed. He prioritises pleasure, while she prioritises achievement. He will eventually get on with the list of jobs, and she will eventually relax. But at that moment in time, they seem to be on different planets! So many arguments can be avoided by explicitly referencing the Pleasure Achievement Principle. It is so simple, yet so fundamental in determining our world view and the way that we live our lives. The third segment of the lifestyle pie concerns our Leisure activities, and the book asks us whether we prefer to be competitive and goal orientated, or whether leisure provides us with an opportunity to kick back and enjoy ourselves. Do we play golf to win, or to relax with friends? Do we sail to race, or do we just cruise? When we meet up with our friends do they ask “How are you?” or do they ask “What have you been up to?” Reviewing the expectations of our social groups is a highlight of the book. Are we all struggling to get ahead, or are we happy to enjoy life for what it is?
There are no right or wrong answers here. The book simply invites readers to consider whether they have the balance right in their own lives. Are they living a sluggish, indulgent life, or a driven, stressful life? When clients approach a life
coach, their issues can always be quickly referenced against the Principles outlined in this book. They can be invited to review the balance. Clients may have an excessive preference for pleasure, which means that they hate gyms, they don’t set goals, and they indulge excessively in unhealthy pleasures (fast foods, alcohol, cigarettes, and impulse shopping). Or they may have an excessive preference for achievement, in which case they present as restless and stressed, unable to relax and enjoy life as it is. Their friends are despairing of them, and they will say that they can never find the time to ‘just
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be’. There are always more things to do, and more mountains to climb. This book provides a perfect adjunct to any coaching plan. By moving through the Chapters in sequence, readers are invited to consider a series of questions, and to become more aware of their lifestyle choices. Do we plan for holidays on the Gold Coast to run half marathons, or to lie on the beach? Do we stay at a party and dance until dawn, or do we ‘achieve closure’ and go home at 10pm so that we can be fresh in the morning? Any coach will find a huge number of useful suggestions arising from this straightforward lifestyle guide. Every page contains thought provoking examples and questions. The penultimate Chapter invites readers to draw up a personal plan based on all of the insights gained. Perhaps the final, most important point that is made is that ‘balance’ is not a boring, static state of occupying the middle ground. Instead, it is a dynamic concept where we play with boundaries, leaning as far to both sides as we dare (without falling over!). A balanced life is not a person standing upright and frozen. It is a person who can extend themselves to either side, and thrill to the breadth of their experience. A balanced person is someone who enjoys life to the full, and who also achieves to their full potential. Someone who can laugh, love and feel sensually alive. But also someone who can dig deep and drive forward towards satisfying goals, and knows that in the end they have lived a fulfilling life. A life well lived. Chris Skellett will be touring Australia offering workshops on the application of the Pleasure Achievement Principle. www.chrisskellettcoonsulting.co.nz
www.empoweronline.com.au
you | Feature
Your
physiology creates your
life
To say that the way you use your body determines your results in life is a strong statement but Rachel Anastasi shows why it is true.
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s a human being you may feel as though you have little say over your experiences, your results and the quality of your life. However, you truly are at the source of it all and understanding of what is naturally going on in your body and mind will put you in the driver’s seat. By far the fastest way to change your life is to change your ‘state’. Your state refers to your emotional state or feelings such as joy, love, depression, excitement, or sadness. Your emotional states, especially those unresourceful ones, such as anxiety, anger, overwhelm or confusion that you experience on a regular basis may feel as if they are beyond your control. You may feel that you do not have a choice when it comes to your emotions. You may even fall victim to your emotions as if it is something that is happening to you. Believe it or not you can take control over your emotional states by understanding how and what you do to create these states in your body. The area that impacts your state the most is your physiology – the way that you hold your body, your breathing, your tone of voice, facial tightness or looseness and expression, your gestures, your speed of movement and your spinal position. Your emotional state dictates your physiology and certain physiology will create certain emotional responses in your body. Your emotional state also determines the meanings you give to events in your life – if your emotional state is positive at the time of a negative event, the negative event won’t affect you as much as if your emotional state is negative at the time of the event. So, your emotional state creates your overall psychology and impacts every decision that you make and every
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action you take in life. It follows that your physiology creates your psychology and will determine your overall outlook, focus and experience of life.
Your body language
Everyone has patterns of emotions and each emotional state has a largely unconscious process that you go through to create the experience of it in your body. When you elicit this strategy and understand it you can either generate desired states or interrupt undesired states. A large component of each strategy will be your physiology. These processes have been happening unconsciously for so many years that you may think there is no other option, however there are always other options available, it simply depends on your focus. Everything you do in life is a strategy, even those things that we take little notice of because we do them so automatically. For example, you use a certain strategy or process when brushing your teeth or getting dressed in the morning. Similarly, there is a process that you go through when you do a certain emotional pattern. So if you are doing overwhelm, your mind will follow a process of thought without even realising it. For example, you may focus on the mess that must be cleaned in your house, then think about the other things that must be done that day, then your heartbeat increases and your breathing quickens. If these things happen in the same order and the same way each time, then they will trigger the same emotional strategy and state. Think about how your body is when you are doing depression and you will notice that there is a certain strategy. You will
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always have your shoulders in a certain position, you will be breathing in a certain way and you may even be behaving a certain way. Bend over and touch the ground and aim to feel elated. This will be very difficult to do because in this position you are slumped and your breathing is shallow. When you are happy or excited, you will naturally hold your face and body in a certain way, use a certain voice and breathe in a certain way. It is very difficult to stand tall, hold your shoulders back, hold your head high, breathe deeply, smile and still do a depressed strategy. It is almost impossible to feel anything other than fabulous. You can’t be excited when your shoulders are slumped, and you can’t be depressed when you’re wearing a smile. Therefore, changing your physiology triggers an immediate emotional reaction that can change your state of mind. If you can manage your physiology, then you can manage your emotions to generate emotional states or interrupt undesired emotional states. Interrupting an undesired emotional state can be very effective. If one part of your natural process does not happen in the same way you cannot activate the same emotional state in the same way. As an example, create a physiology of sadness and then do the chicken dance. It will break the pattern!
Creating your own story
When you are in a resourceful state of mind and experiencing positive emotional states, the meaning you give to events in your personal life will be impacted and your overall psychology will change.
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These meanings are your perception or what you are telling yourself about present circumstances, events or experiences. The meaning that you give these experiences is your choice. Two people can experience the same event and one can be left feeling exhilarated while the other feels upset. The meaning is formed from filters that you apply to the data you are receiving into your brain. These meanings, in turn, form a story, which becomes the context for your life. Resourceful or unresourceful, this story will work like a blueprint in your brain to determine your internal representation. Your internal representation is your internal view of yourself.
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Defining your internal representation
If you change your negative emotional state (through physiology or otherwise), you will change your personal story. Then, when you change your personal story, your internal representation changes, which will result in you creating a new image of yourself. If your internal representation of yourself is: “I am poor”, then you will act in accordance with that representation, make the decisions of a poor person, act like a poor person, speak like a poor person, etc. If you change your story, or internal representation to “I am abundant”, then you will attract different results. The meaning you give something will create your focus and what you focus on is what you will get, to the exclusion of everything else. Any given situation could be perceived in many different ways; however where you choose to focus will prevent you from seeing other possible interpretations. If you walk into a warehouse that is pitch black holding a torch, you will only see what you choose to shine your light on, it is the same in life. If you focus on the opportunities a particular experience may provide all that you will see is opportunities, whereas if you focus on the challenges an opportunity may provide, all you will see is challenges. Where you choose to focus, will affect your physiology, so by shifting your focus and looking at things differently then you can change your state. This means that you will need to focus on shifting whatever is negative in your life story that causes you
to live in a negative emotional state, to a more positive emotional state. Once this happens, you will create a positive internal representation.
What are you focusing on?
If there is a situation or an event coming up that you are particularly concerned about and you imagine it going badly, you may feel anxious. You may choose to focus all of your attention and thoughts on your feelings of anxiety. This focus can consume your mind to the point where your emotional state is negatively affected. However, if you imagine the situation or experience turning out exactly the way that you want – with a positive outcome – then you will feel relaxed and calm. This is where your focus can impact your state. The emotional states that you experience most regularly
state then change will not persist. Start by changing your physiology that will affect who you are being and how you feel on the inside and you will take different actions as a result. If you start moving your body in a different way to how you have in the past, your psychology will change and so will your results. Change your state and get your life moving in the direction you want.
affect where you focus. If you are in a negative state you are most likely to focus in on the negatives and create a negative story. If you want change in your life, and especially if you want rapid change, you need to look at changing your emotional state, your story and your strategies. Most people look at strategies first as they perceive this to be the easiest route. They believe that if they just DO things differently change will prevail. You can change your strategies alone but if you have a stronger counteracting internal representation, story or emotional Rachel Anastasi is the founder of Free To Be Me Life Coaching and www.secretsofasuccesscoach.com. Her expertise are as a personal coach, facilitator and speaker. With a strong understanding of human behaviour she assists clients to create transformational change. Rachel also develops resources and training for other coaches. www.freetobemecoaching.com.au
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www.empoweronline.com.au
you | Spirituality
Insightful
Intuition
Your intuition’s sole priority is you. Emanuela Pannone explains how you need to be aware of your intuitive moments to live your best life.
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ust like a personal navigation system, intuition lives in all of us and is always switched on and working behind the scenes. What exactly isintuition and why do we have it? Intuition is a certain hunch or feeling that advises us to move ahead, slow down or change our course of direction. An inner knowledge of when something is right or wrong with someone or a certain situation. The feeling that you need to call a friend only to find out they were just about to call you. Running late for work and then discovering that if you had been on the road 10 minutes earlier, you may have been involved in a traffic accident. The examples are endless and they occur every day whether we are aware of them or not. Our lives are increasingly busy, stressful and full of distractions with whatever is happening outside of us to give a second thought to whatever is going on within. This amazing, insightful inner power of intuition is capable of much more than reminding us that we have forgotten to turn off the iron before leaving the house. Your intuition’s sole priority and concern is you. It works as your invisible
personal assistant helping you decide on the right job, reminding you to make doctor’s appointments, choosing the perfect partner, coming up with the best solutions, keeping you safe, protected and more. It can also guide you to meet the right people, be at the right place, arrange so called coincidences and receive ideas to ensure that you gain the confidence required to fulfil your dreams. This untapped source of wisdom sometimes works overtime when its gentle guidance goes unnoticed or ignored. The connection through our emotions can sometimes become distorted and does not allow us to recognise or trust the ‘gut feelings’ that we experience. For example, all the emotional and physical roadblocks that one encounters when one feels they may be on the wrong path. People often make the mistake of seeking the opinions of others instead of listening to their own inner guidance. Whenever feelings of frustration or disappointment arise, rest assured that it is usually a strong message from your intuition to stop, reassess and make the necessary changes, as there is definitely something better that awaits you. Letting go and believing that we can be led to a right path or opportunity intuitively, can sometimes be challenging. Trying to control how things should be instead of allowing them to just unfold, ultimately
takes away opportunities and positive experiences. By being aware of those ‘intuitive’ moments you will develop a communication link that will help you gain insight and a successful connection with your intuition. This awareness can lead you to discover the answers that are necessary to create healthy positive changes that may have otherwise been ignored or overlooked. It’s important to learn to recognize how your emotions respond to changes and situations, as they are strong indicators as to whether or not you are on the right path. Our emotions are dedicated messengers sent from our intuition to inform us of progress. The more positive we feel, the more we create and attract positive things to us so that we may fulfil our highest potential with unlimited results. Positive emotions are an encouraging sign that tell us to keep going because as we are on the right track. Whereas, negative emotions are a red flag indicating that we have temporarily drifted off our path and our attention is required to release or change something that is no longer working. Intuition’s gentle persistence is always guiding you towards a right path to achieving the best that life has to offer. Learn to trust your inner voice and enjoy how life is meant to flow, without the unnecessary accumulations of doubts and fears that we often collect over the years. Take note of your surroundings and watch for repetitive signs and coincidences, as these are other ways that your intuition is asking for your attention. Allow yourself the pleasure of letting go and trusting yourself as you follow your intuition and become the leader of your life. The possibilities will be endless, so allow your intuition to sit in the driver’s seat. Emanuela Pannone is an intuitive writer and creator of Lifetiles 108 who began her career studying Fashion at RMIT Melbourne. She is passionate about developing concepts that help others follow their own intuition, in simple easy to understand ways. www.lifetiles108.com.au
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5
Relationship
life | Feature
ruptures
Unresolved issues in a relationship inevitably turn into ruptures that at some stage will explode. Kirsty Greenshields highlights the five top ruptures and how to repair them.
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ix years ago my marriage was on the brink of divorce. We barely spoke, I was raising a small baby, cooking and cleaning for my husband, and there was no emotional connection. Sex was a chore. I felt like I was giving so much, but receiving nothing in return. Then one night, in the heat of a rare argument, I hit him. It was like the eruption of a hot volcano – one that had been at boiling point for some time. Married and divorced before I was 24 years old, I have learned some serious lessons in relationships. As I took my unresolved issues into my second marriage, I was forced to face some hard truths about myself, my ability to set boundaries and how to retain my authentic voice in my relationship. In my own experience, there are five common issues that can cause ruptures in a relationship.
1. Neglecting your partner
If you have been in relationship for a number of years, it’s likely you have at least one child, both work at demanding jobs, have responsibilities and hobbies outside of the relationship, or other demands that take you away from spending time together. As time goes by and you spend less and less time with each other you don’t connect anymore.
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2. Dishonesty
How often have you compromised on something you really want because your partner doesn’t want the same thing? Dishonesty doesn’t have to be as drastic as betrayal of the relationship – it can
be as simple as dishonesty with yourself, which leads to a lack of authenticity in the relationship.
3. Negativism
Negativism is when you constantly focus on the negatives about your partner – you nag, nit-pick or criticize them. Unresolved issues breed negativism, and they stem from a lack of communication with yourself and your partner.
4. Attacking your partner
Attack does not have to be physical. You may attack, or be attacked with verbal blaming, accusing, snide remarks, sarcasm, or insults. Attacking usually begins to occur after a period of negativism, and when resentment in the relationship has begun to build.
5. Neglecting Yourself
If you are neglecting your partner, chances are you are neglecting yourself at some level. Your relationship with your partner is a reflection of your relationship with yourself, and if you are not taking the time to spend with your partner, you are probably not taking the time to spend with yourself.
Repairing the ruptures
Here are a few simple tips to prevent the ruptures from becoming unresolvable wars, allowing you to restore and maintain a loving, authentic relationship:
1. Schedule ‘Me Time’ (yes, very original, I know), at the beginning of every day. When you wake up in the morning, ask yourself, “What do I want out of today?” If you like to meditate, this is also the best time, and it sends a strong message to yourself and others around you that you are serious about putting you first. You will then build a greater connection with yourself, and provide greater opportunity to build a stronger connection with your partner. 2. Say “No” when you want to. The fix to ensuring that dishonesty and negativism don’t become the norm is by exercising assertiveness – expressing your boundaries in a healthy way. If you don’t like something, or don’t want to do it, say, “No”. The more you say it, the more you will know it is okay to feel the way you do, and to express that feeling. 3. Schedule a little time together each day. A daily ritual of gratitude allows you to reconnect every day. Before you get into bed, spend a few minutes talking to each other about what you were grateful for during the day. Make a big effort to find something that you were specifically grateful for about your partner. It will make them feel loved, and make you feel good, because the more good things you find in your partner, the better you start to feel about yourself and your relationship.
Kirsty Greenshields is a passionate partner, mum and business owner. She is the founder of Create Perfect Health, dedicated to empowering you to let go of unhealthy habits and create balance and harmony in your life. She is also the author of the upcoming book, “Woman, Money and Intimacy”. www.kirstygreenshields.com
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www.empoweronline.com.au
life | Feature
go shopping and don’t know what you are looking for; you end up being unhappy with the product and not using it. If you are unclear about exactly what you want in a relationship, you are more likely to attract someone with whom you will be unhappy.
Getting Clarity
Looking for love… in all the
wrong places
Do you feel like you’ve tried and tried to find love without success? It may be that you simply need to switch your focus. Dr. Vesna Grubacevic explains…
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f you are single, like most single people, you want to attract the love you desire and create a lasting and fulfilling relationship. It is possible. The truth is love is all around you – all you need to do is to focus your thoughts and energy on attracting it. In my experience, most people make the mistake of focusing their energy on where they should go and how often, to
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find the love they seek rather than focusing on who they wish to attract. This approach doesn’t generally work and it may be time to switch your focus within to attract the person you desire. If you are not clear about what you want and what is important to you in a relationship, you will attract anyone and everyone, including people you may be unhappy with. This is similar to when you
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You may think you have clarity about what you want in a relationship. However, before you attend another social occasion, complete the exercises below to get some insights into your behaviour and whether or not it is serving you. The first step is to clarify what you value in life. Being clear about your values is critical. Values are what are important to you in life, e.g. success, happiness, love, freedom, health, etc. They determine your priorities and, therefore, how you spend your time. If something is really important to you (e.g. health), you will spend more time on it and put it above other things. In contrast, if something is not that important to you, you will spend little time on it and have few results in that area. Here is an exercise to assist you with clarifying what is important in your life. On a sheet of paper, answer the following question and write down the first things that come to mind, without editing your replies: “What is important to me in life right now?” Make sure you write down what is important to you right now, rather than what you want it to be or what it should be. Now read through the list and ask yourself “What else is important to me in life right now?” Add additional things that come to mind. Then look through that list of values and prioritise them in order of importance, from #1 (most important), to next important, etc. Do this very quickly and avoid analysing it. Rewrite the list in order of importance. For example: 1. Happiness 2. Health 3. Career 4. Freedom 5. Friendships
Self assessment one
As you look at your list of life values, what do you notice? Is a relationship on your list of life values or is it missing (as in the
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example above)? Is a relationship on your list of life values but as a very low priority? If a relationship is missing from your list of life values, this explains why you have not been attracting a relationship – it is just not important to you in life, so you are not taking action toward it. If a relationship is on your list of life values, however it is a low priority (i.e., number 6 or below), it is not as important to you as the other life values, so you are spending more time on the higher up priorities and very little on a relationship. The top five values are the ones that are most important to you and they will occupy most of your focus, time, and energy. Ideally, if you want to attract and keep a relationship in your life, a relationship should be in your top five life values; the higher up it is as a priority, the more time and energy you will spend on attracting it and making it work.
What do you value?
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What you value in a relationship will explain the types of partners you have been attracting and whether you have been attracting the relationship that you truly want. On another sheet of paper, answer the question below and write down the first things that come to mind, again without editing your replies: “What is important to me in a relationship right now?” Make sure you write down what is important to you right now, rather than what you want it to be or what it should be. Next, read through the list and ask yourself “What else is important to me in a relationship right now?” Add any additional things that come to mind. Then look through the list and prioritise them in order of importance. Do this very quickly and trust your intuition to number your values quickly. Rewrite this list in order of importance. For example: 1. Attraction 2. Sex 3. Independence 4. Friendship 5. Happiness
Self assessment two
As you look at your list of relationship values, what do you notice? Do the values on your list reflect the partner you truly desire or the people you have been attracting with whom you have been unhappy? Is there anything missing on your list? In the above example, attraction and sex are most important in a relationship and happiness is less important. The person with those relationship values will spend more of their focus on finding a partner to whom they are attracted and they have sex with, rather than a partner who fulfils their need for happiness in a relationship. In the above example, values like love, commitment, loyalty, trust, etc. are missing. This suggests that those things may not be that important to that person and so they may be attracting potential partners who lack love and commitment. Remember that the top five values are the ones that are most important to you and they will occupy most of your focus, time, and energy in a relationship. If you want to attract and keep a relationship you truly desire, make sure that the top five values in a relationship reflect what you seek and desire in a relationship. If your top five values are what you want in a relationship, yet you have been attracting partners with whom you have been unhappy, then you need to take a close look at your beliefs about relationships and yourself.
All love is self love
If you want to attract love in a relationship, first you need to project love from inside. You will receive what you give. If you are closed off to love, you will not attract it. If you do not love yourself, you will not attract it from others. If you put yourself down, are too hard on yourself, and treat yourself with disrespect, that is what you will attract in a relationship. People will only treat you as you treat yourself. Consider your beliefs about yourself, write down what you believe about yourself and a relationship. Then look through
the beliefs you wrote down and notice, are they empowering or disempowering? For example, do you believe you deserve love or are unworthy of love? Do you fear rejection, being hurt, or commitment? Whatever your beliefs, these will be reflected in your behaviour and other people will respond accordingly. For example, if you withdraw love when you get too close to a partner for fear of being hurt, after a while your partner may start to withdraw in return, and you may end up feeling hurt as a result. Once you are clear about what you want in a relationship, avoid compromising what you truly want, as this will disempower you. People who have total self love only go for what they truly want in a relationship and in life. It is only people who lack self love who settle for second best or say “it’s better than nothing”.
Look for love in the right place
The best place to start looking for love is within you, by becoming aware of your values and beliefs. This is why it is important to be clear about your life and relationship values and to align these for attracting and keeping your desired partner. Internal alignment begins with clarifying your values, identifying any values and beliefs which are misaligned, and then realigning those at the unconscious level. This alignment is more than simply rewriting your values as you want them to be, as this is simply working on a conscious level and will not lead to a long term change. Instead, by aligning your values and beliefs at the unconscious level, you will create a fast and long-term change that is congruent and automatically reflected in your behaviour. Once you are internally aligned with exactly the relationship you want and show yourself the love you wish to receive from your partner, you will more easily attract the loving relationship you desire.
Dr. Vesna Grubacevic is the founder of award-winning company Qt, an NLP Trainer who holds a PhD in Clinical Hypnotherapy, and a BEc. She is an author, speaker, and the creator of breakthrough behavioural change techniques. For more techniques on improving your relationships and for your FREE gifts, visit www.qttransformation.com
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. . . y e n r u o joyful j
inspirational profile
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eventually
It’s been said that hindsight is 20/20. Rhiannon’s story of success and failure, and the lessons learned along the way, reveals how clear it can really be.
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n my wildest dreams I could never have imagined drawing to myself the events or experiences I have had in my life. Life before the disastrous downfall, that is the final downfall, was pretty much like anyone else’s – busyness, ups and downs, challenges, good times and bad times. Like many people, who had been employed and disillusioned, for many years I thought that one day if I had my own business, I could run it the way it “should” be run. I could then be incredibly creative with it and treat staff the way I believed they should be treated. Then after 15 years, one day idealism meets realism. Along with my business partner, I worked 18 hour days for years without the business producing even a meagre income and I realised that perhaps having a business is not all that it is cracked up to be. The business became more of a ball and chain in my life. I was deep in bank loans and leases, with staff to pay and sales to be made. I became a hamster on a wheel going round and round, not sure when or if I may be able to get off. I had a
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failing business with 35 staff members. I was incredibly stressed about making the payroll and whether or not we would make a profit. Working in the business daily I guess I became somewhat anaesthetised to the possibilities and because I was so bone tired, I resigned myself to just ‘keep going ad infinitum’ waiting for the turning point where everything would improve. What I did not realise was that my life was slowly eroding in front of my eyes. I became more tired and less interested. I also had a one-year-old child who was not getting the energy he needed from me. To top it off, in the middle of everything I discovered that my husband was trans-gender; perhaps the hardest surprise of all. I never had any suspicions of my husband’s other lifestyle; he was a fire fighter, surveyor, mechanic, extreme skier and AAA ice hockey player and demonstrated all the seemingly tough and macho behaviours. It all erupted one day when I unexpectedly came home to find my husband standing in the kitchen in my best lingerie and pink high heels. Needless to say I didn’t know how to respond. He walked up to me and said, “ I have always wanted to be a girl.” I took a deep breath, held his hands, looked him up and down and said, “You will be a beautiful girl.” I then ran out the door and cried every day for a year. I became a vessel just going through the motions of living, thinking one day I would wake up. Dealing with everything at once took me way out of my depth not knowing what was ‘real’ anymore. I think I was so numb I couldn’t feel anything. I was a vessel just going through the motions of living. We decided to get counselling – him for transgender and me for shock. After four
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inspirational profile
months of living with him as Brian during the day and “Sasha” at night time I asked him to leave. Counselling turned out to be the greatest gift in my life however and after 18 months I had ‘unpacked’ so many limiting self-beliefs. Today, my ‘ex-wife’ and I are still friends. Following this series of events and continued business struggles I ended up living in a tent with my four year old son; a time of great stress. Initially, I kept finding places to “house-sit” until I ran out of steam. My desire to have a life had died and I remember saying to God, “If this is my life, then so be it.” So, I asked my girlfriend for a tent to live in – at least then we would have a portable roof over our heads. My son and I lived in that tent for three months. I prayed to God daily to change it, but I felt he wasn’t listening. One night I thought to myself, “What is the most ridiculous amount of money I could make in a month so that Jaiesh and I do not have to live like this?” I wrote down $40,000 on a piece of paper. It was only 18 months later I was able to bank earnings of $40,811 in one month. When my life changed it happened really fast. I got a call from my mum to say she was very sick and in that moment I made the decision to move to Australia from Canadato care for her. In a heartbeat I borrowed money from one friend and points for an airfare from another friend to get to her. When I came back to Australia to look after my mother it gave me a different focus and it was difficult in a completely different way. The thing I most appreciated was that we had a roof over my head. Wow, I didn’t care how small the place was or that we shared our nights between the couch, the bed and the floor. What I loved was the fact that we came home to the same place each and every day. My confidence and self esteem however were nowhere to be seen. I still did not care about much and was still having problems understanding that it was my decisions and my mindset that had allowed this to happen to me. I simply could not fathom that I had done this to myself. I was also still trying to run the business from Australia and after about four months my business partner angrily requested that I legally sign the business over to her.
It took me a year to finally ‘fess up’ and say, “I did it all to myself!” (although, I must say that struggling for all that time has allowed me to give my future success some significance). Once my mum recovered, I spent two years and literally hundreds of thousands of dollars changing my limiting beliefs and re-educating myself to become a business coach. In the beginning it was very hard; I kept sabotaging myself with a victim, poverty and scarcity mentality. I did not know how to change my life, let alone my thoughts. When I first began coaching I was still lacking so much in confidence and self–esteem. I constantly cried because it all seemed too hard. I felt so much pressure to get clients results and when they didn’t or wanted to fire me, I wanted to pull my hair out. I simply did not know what to do. This pivotal and transformative time was the time I was most likely to quit on myself – but I didn’t. I had to make this work, as I was already heavily invested. I had taken out yet another loan on top of very significant debt but, in my heart I knew I could be a fabulous coach. In hindsight I am so glad that I never gave up on myself. Now I am one of the most sought after business coaches in the world. I speak regularly in front of large groups and am paid well to do this. I am also a best-selling author of three books. It’s been a slow process but I am very lucky to have an extremely significant driver in my son. I wanted my son to have choices; to have a life. I wanted to be able to give him the things I didn’t have. To get to this place, I finally spent all my time and energy on fixing myself, learning, and also paying back debts. Now my life is very different – I can do whatever I want pretty much whenever I want. I make more money now than I did in the last 20 years combined. I am thankful to have stuck it out and for going through that transformative process. I pinch myself every day that I can live this life – that I have choice. My company is called Love Living the Dream – and I think that just about sums it up. Like me, you will realise that you are far more powerful than you will ever know. So now is the time for you to harness your own untapped potential and see what you can create for yourself. If you truly want it
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and can stay the course, then you too can produce an extraordinary life. One of my favourite quotes of all time comes from an old Buddhist saying: “Only the chosen few have the opportunity of true tragedy because it is only through the experience of true tragedy that one can then experience joy in every cell of their being.” This quote rings true in every area of my life. I have cried a million tears and felt forsaken in the depths of despair. Yet, if that is what it took for me to be able to live life in a truly free and joyful state, then it was worth every tear I cried.
Read Rhiannon’s full story in her book, How to Climb Mt Everest in Sandals
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wellbeing | Spotlight On
needling Find your fountain of youth! Eva Kucharzewski reveals how you can experience the skin care treatment that is fast becoming the most popular because of its endless benefits.
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kin needling, also known as Collagen Induction Therapy, originated in China and has been practised for over 2000 years. In the last fifty years various research has been conducted into needling of the skin that has found some remarkable results, already known to acupuncturists.
Why have skin needling?
By your mid thirties you generally lose about 50% of your skin’s collagen. Prior to the discovery of skin needling as a technique, the solution for this was to use collagen injections, collagen creams and collagen masks. The problem with those however is that the results are temporary and as soon as the collagen has been eliminated from the body (in the case of injections) another treatment is needed. Skin needling on the other hand, provides similar results to Laser, Chemical Peels and Dermabrasion but is far less invasive. This translates to a far lower risk of complications and a faster recovery time. If you are already experiencing signs of aging, it will take several treatments before you build up enough collagen in the skin to really see the anti-aging benefits. However,
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by the time you build up enough collagen, your skin will look better than before and you will be preventing more signs of aging. To understand the process, think of a wrinkle as a lack of collagen. The size and depth of the wrinkle determines how much collagen you need to build up to be of benefit. If you are not yet noticing signs of aging and want to prevent collagen loss it is recommended to use the technique intensively for three months every year to ensure you have a good amount of collagen. We have customers who have used the derma roller regularly for over a year with continuous improvement (as a note of caution, before commencing any treatment, ensure you see a trained skin needling therapist).
How is skin needling administered?
Skin needling is a procedure that involves using a Skin Roller, which when rolled over the skin, produces hundreds of microscopic puncture wounds to the skin’s dermis. Each dermal injury triggers the body’s natural wound healing response within the skin, thereby stimulating collagen production. Each successive treatment deposits new collagen to the treatment area that progressively fills in depressed scars and deep lines. There are different sizes of skin roller, suited for at home use and professional use.
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Subject to intensive research in Europe and the USA, skin rollers have clearly proven their amazing anti-aging properties. Some of the key findings are listed below. • The skin roller increases the absorption of anti-aging products by up to 10,000 times in a single use. • The needling roller can increase collagen production in the skin by up to 1,000% in a single treatment. • There is no other therapy that makes your skin produce collagen. • Skin roller needles are long enough to stimulate collagen production in skin, but short enough to prevent damage to skin, pain and complications. • Using the Skin Roller will enhance the penetration of any skincare ingredient; 200 times more product delivery. • Dermal rollers do the same job as lasers and other ablative methods by increasing the production of collagen with minimal damage to the protective layer of the skin. • Dermal rollers are just as effective as lasers, IPL, Thermage and other similar treatments, but cost only a fraction of the other treatments.
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What can skin needling treat?
Skin needling is fast becoming one of the most popular and effective skin-care treatment alternatives to laser resurfacing, microdermabrasion, chemical peeling and other more invasive aesthetic procedures. The process facilitates and stimulates the skin’s natural repair ability without causing permanent epidermal damage. The skin roller treats a number of skin concerns such as:
Anti-Aging
With the major cause of skin aging being collagen loss, the needling roller is highly effective as an anti-aging solution for wrinkles, skin damage, crow’s feet, lip creases, coarse skin, pigmentation problems, sun damage and sagging skin. This is because, as research has shown, the Skin Roller can increase collagen production in the skin by up to 1,000% in a single treatment. The needling roller has also been shown to increase the absorption of anti-aging beauty products through the skin by up to 10,000 times in a single treatment. This means any effective antiaging product used with the Skin Roller will be even more effective (it’s also therefore important to ensure any products used with the roller and both natural and safe). We recommend using the Alpha H 20% Vitamin C serum with the needling roller.
Scar Reduction
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Traditionally, scars have been considered very difficult to treat however based on physician use of the needling rollers, the average improvement in scars has been shown to be around 70%. Depending on the type of scar being treated and the depth of the scar, a different length-needling roller is used. For most scars on the body, including deep ice pick scars on the shoulders we recommend using the 1mm needling roller. For smaller scars on the face we recommend the 0.5mm derma roller.
Needling rollers can be used on: chicken pox scars, ice pick scars, appendectomy scars, burn scars, surgery or surgical scars, C-section scarring, tummy tuck scar removal, and acne scarring.
Cellulite
The needling roller is highly effective in removing the appearance of cellulite because it causes the skin to thicken, tighten and restore elasticity. It also increases the production of collagen fibres and elastin fibres, improving the appearance of the skin immediately. Unlike other techniques such as skin peels and Dermabrasion, skin needling does not damage the skin or remove the epidermis. This also means it is suitable for all types of skin.
Stretchmarks
Stretch Marks (or striae) occur when the body grows at a rate that the skin cannot keep up with. Although commonly associated with pregnancy they are also a normal part of puberty or quick weight gain. Of interest about 80% of women get stretchmarks during pregnancy and they are usually permanent. Although the skin is usually fairly elastic, when it is overstretched, collagen, which is responsible for keeping the skin tight and supple, is not produced normally. By producing collagen in the area of the stretchmarks, the needling roller reduces their appearance. Best of all, unlike Dermabrasion or laser therapy, there is no risk of pigmentation loss, as the outer layer of skin is not removed.
Hair Loss
Skin needling has been used for hair restoration in China for thousands of years. In this case the needling roller is used in conjunction with a Chinese herbal hair restoration spray, designed to assist in hair regrowth and improve hair quality. Using the needling roller is said to increase absorption of the spray through the skin (transdermal) by up to 10,000 times in a single use.
How frequent are the treatments?
Skin needling treatments are normally spaced one to one and a half months apart. After skin needling, the skin does not risk permanent structural damage, sun sensitivity, skin colour loss or hyperpigmentation. Moreover, the epidermis is left intact, so the healing period after skin needling is rapid. The results of skin needling are evident after a few weeks and your skin’s texture and scar appearance will continue to improve over a 12-month period.
What does it feel like?
When undergoing a skin needling treatment you may feel slight discomfort around sensitive areas such as the top of the lip. In this case a topical numbing cream may be used. The extent of discomfort is also dependent on the size of the needling roller being used. There are many different skin rollers available with different needle lengths and needle diameters. Needle diameter is very important as we wish to maximise the dermal injury but not create a new scar. In performing skin needling we recommend using a roller no bigger than 0.5mm. This is the smallest needle size that has been shown to induce collagen production. Smaller needles may be used but these may not maximise the dermal injury and will therefore produce results slower. Needle length is also important. The aim of the skin needling technique is to reach the upper dermis layer called the intermediate reticular dermis. This layer contains the highest number of cells that are able to produce new collagen. The dermis layer of the face (other than the eyelids) varies from 0.3mm to 1mm in depth and therefore the needle length must be adequate. The number of needles on a roller is not an important consideration, as repeated rolling will cause numerous dermal injuries.
Eva Kucharzewski is the owner and manager of Exclusive Beauty Treatments MediSpa and has over 25 years experience in the beauty industry. Eva’s extensive expertise in skincare, wellness technologies, and advance beauty treatments provides clients with the latest in non-surgical, safe and effective anti-aging treatments to restore and rejuvenate the skin. www.exclusivebeautytreatments.com.au
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wellbeing | Feature
Change your code
In The Click Diet, Scott Penn explains the nine ‘codes’ of behaviour that impact your weight. Here, we outline those codes and show you how to crack them to lose weight.
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veryone knows that eating well and exercising are how you lose weight on a weekly basis but to achieve your happy weight and maintain it long-term, you have to understand your ‘code’. The term ‘code’ describes the patterns of behaviour that are typically automatic and ultimately control your weight. They are essentially habits and have evolved over months and years of practice. We do them because we get benefits from them, such as pleasure, stress-relief or distraction. However, while these benefits are usually immediate the consequences are long-term. You can change your code through three steps: 1. Understand the behaviour patterns that have caused you to gain weight. Determine your code. 2. Identify the emotional and situational triggers for those patterns 3. Replace these old habits with new helpful habits which lead to weight loss Find your code and learn how to crack it to achieve your weight goal.
‘Never knew that’ code
Ignorance is usually bliss, but in your case not knowing about food and calories has led to weight gain. If this is your code you may be surprised to find that 97% fat-free yoghurts can still be packed with calories and just because a food is ‘healthy’ doesn’t mean you can eat all you want. De-code: why you do it You’ve either tuned out because you find the subject of human nutrition confusing, or you just haven’t been exposed to the basics of good nutrition. While eating habits can take time to change, knowledge gaps are, thankfully, easy to fill. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Build your knowledge – make a habit of checking nutrition labels and consider
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what percentage of your daily intake allowance they’ll take up. Ask yourself, ‘Is it worth it?’ 2. Do a diet audit – make a list of what a typical day of eating has been for you and work out how many calories you’ve been spending
‘Couch’ code
There’s nothing like the cushy comfort of your lounger chair, and as a Couch Coder you reckon that exercise is overrated. Deep down you know that although life on the couch is comfy, it’s also very limiting De-code: why you do it Couch Coders are essentially procrastinators – you avoid making healthy changes out of fear of embarrassment or failure. In your mind it’s all too hard, so you give up even before you get started. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Take it one step at a time – focus on small achievable weight-loss tasks rather than massive life overhaul. For example, rather than a full-on exercise regime start with walking up and down the hall during commercial breaks. Focus on frequency rather than duration 2. Change your perspective – ‘rewire’ the negative thoughts that keep you on the couch. Ask yourself, ‘What excuses do I use to stay on the couch? What do I need to say to myself to be more active? 3. Reduce couch time – try to swap 10-25 per cent of your ‘small screen’ time with moving more.
‘Comfort’ code
You eat to ease emotional upsets or soothe pain. You feel your emotions very strongly and try to suppress them with foods that have a ‘mouth feel’, such as chocolate, ice cream and peanut butter. For you, food is familiar and nurturing- when your world is
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falling apart, you can still depend on your favourite biscuits. De-code: why you do it The physical process of eating is soothing. When we eat certain food, such as chocolate, the brain chemical serotonin is released into the body, relaxing you and encouraging you to repeat the behaviour again. But, this relief lasts only minutes and the ramifications are felt for days, weeks, years. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Identify your triggers – note your thoughts and feelings in a food diary and try to find the link between what you were thinking/feeling and bouts of emotional eating. The goal is to become aware of what’s driving your emotions and find alternative ways to respond to them. 2. Find non-food sources of comfort – be prepared with a list of alternative actions you can take when emotion strikes. For example, go for a walk, phone a friend, do some yoga. 3. Try comfort ‘lite’ – rather than opening a packet of biscuits, try porridge cooked with skim milk and a little honey or baked bananas with low-fat custard. 4. Go deeper – consider visiting a health psychologist to talk through the issues that are causing you to comfort eat.
‘Stress’ code
Life is tense and food and alcohol help you keep a lid on it. The stress code manifests in two ways. Either you get stressed, you overeat or drink too much to relieve the tension or life is so stressful that you’re not focused on healthy habits that keep your weight in check. De-code: why you do it Eating for stress has its roots in human biology. Throughout history times of stress were time of war or famine, and our
Feature | wellbeing
ancestors turned to energy-cleanse foods as a means of survival. So, it’s natural human instinct to crave sweet, salty or fatty food when under pressure. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Exercise – the ultimate stress-reliever, exercise has the added benefit of boosting your weight loss, not detracting from it like stress eating does. 2. De-stress – the goal is to resolve or improve the issues causing stress in your life so they don’t affect your diet. 3. Take a breather – in times of stress when you feel the urge to eat, avoid the sweet, salty of fatty foods for 10 minutes. You may find this is enough time for the craving to subside.
‘Out of Control’ code
Once you start, you can’t stop. You tend to ignore feelings of fullness and eat or drink to the bottom of the packet/tub/ can/bottle. You promise to have just one piece/biscuit/slice but you can’t stop until it’s all gone. There’s a part of you eating on autopilot, oblivious to how many calories you’re consuming De-code: why you do it For most people this is largely environmental – food is there; you smell it, you see it, so you eat it. The bouts are often triggered by hunger and you are notoriously bad at keeping to a regular meal schedule. Some ‘Out of controllers’ are also ‘speed eaters’. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Manage your hunger – never let yourself get too ravenous by eating every few hours or at east five times a day. 2. Control your environment – it is critical that you don’t keep ‘Whoa’ foods in your environment. You know the ones. 3. Learn to stop – don’t eat ‘straight from the packet’. Rather, dish out a small quantity into a bowl. If you start eating and recognise that you may not be able to stop, immediately put the food away or throw it in the bin. Better wasted in the bin than in your body.
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‘Chaos’ code
You’re disorganized, always eating on the run and can’t find time for exercise. You love the drama of being busy – it helps you feel important – but ultimately, living so
in the ‘now’ can have aftershocks on your health. De-code: why you do it Those who choose the chaos code do so partly because it’s addictive but also because it gives you a sense of purpose. The behaviour pattern is ultimately a survival strategy, which helps keep you from drowning in the multitude of tasks and obligations. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Squeeze it in – try to be as active as possible as part of your day-t-day activities. Use a pedometer to measure your steps and work up to achieving 10,000 per day 2. Stock up and be prepared – ensure your fridge, freezer and cupboard are full of healthy meals and snacks – that way you can eat on the run without the additional calories. 3. Beware of high-risk zones – If you are vulnerable to petrol station or vending machine snacks have a coping strategy. For example, avoid keeping small change in your pocket; keep your handbag in the boot so it’s too much hassle to get it out.
‘Carer’s’ code
You’re so busy looking after everyone else that you have no time and little energy to take care of yourself. De-code: why you do it Many carers feel that they have little choice – ‘If I don’t do it, who will?’ but know that if you don’t take care of your health, it will become increasingly difficult to fulfill your carer’s role to the best f your ability. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Be a role model – use the knowledge that children learn from the example you set to encourage yourself. 2. Avoid leftovers – ensure you eat structured meals like everyone else rather than picking at leftovers or nibbling while preparing food. 3. Say no – practice saying no and asking for what you want. Your needs are as important as everyone else’s so make an effort to put yourself first sometimes.
‘Good Times’ code
Too much is never enough. You love to party; however your pursuit of pleasure and fondness for food and alcohol has lead to weight gain.
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De-code: why you do it You get all manner of pay-offs from using food and alcohol as the foundation of fun. That said, some Good-timers are also deeply unhappy and cover it up by chasing fun. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Celebrate in non-food ways – try to navigate your social occasions away from food and towards events where you can be active. 2. Maintain control – don’t arrive at events ravenous – have a healthy snack before you go. Don’t overfill your plate or go for seconds. 3. Go easy on alcohol – alcohol weakens your resolve and can make you indiscriminate about your food choices. Try alternating alcohol with a diet soft drink.
‘All or nothing’ code
You’re either giving a diet 200% or you are giving up. You tend to be a ‘black and white’ thinker, and when you hit a hurdle you focus on the negatives and relapse into your old unhelpful habits. De-code: why you do it Those in this code tend to do so for one of two reasons: 1) we’re perfectionists who have expectations that are hard to meet; or 2) we’re impatient and are looking for a quick fix. Re-code: how to crack it 1. Remember that all the little things count – you’ve got a better chance of achieving your weight goal by making small, sustainable changes than drastic all-or-nothing ones. 2. Recover quickly after setbacks – avoid taking setbacks personally and turning them into a personal failing. Instead reflect on the situation and consider the positive steps you have already taken and the lessons to be learned. 3. Do it gradually – weight loss is like a marathon, not a sprint. Pace yourself and be realistic about what you can achieve, and by when.
Developed by the same team, check out ClickFit.com, a personalised nutrition, training and tracking tool that helps your reach your fitness, weight loss or sports performance goals faster.
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with every subscription Subscribe to emPOWER before May 31st, 2012 and thanks to Contours gyms, you’ll also receive two weeks free membership to Contours, valued at $175. WOW! Finally! A Better Workout so You Achieve Better Results! Introducing the NEW Contours - because women are tired of running around in circles! Contours understands exactly what women want and we know what works. So we’ve redesigned our 29 minute workout to better fit your goals, your schedule and your wallet. Our new program makes losing weight and toning up even easier. It’s fun, fast and perfect for all shapes and sizes. And with our fully qualified staff to motivate and support you every step of the way, it leads straight to success.
Start Today and Quickly Discover the New You! Be the Best You Can Be with Contours! Meet some Contours success stories at www.contours.net.au
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Working out to lose weight If you want to lose weight like the Biggest Loser contestants personal trainer Amanda Preece explains how and what you need to be aware of.
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orking out to lose weight can involve lengthy training programs that take annoying periods of time before achieving results. However there are ways to lose substantial amounts of weight in shorter time periods. As a starting point, obviously you would need to cut down on calorie intake but remember, eating too few calories can have a negative impact on your health. It is important that your body receives optimal nutrition throughout the weight loss process otherwise your body loses the ability to function properly which is dangerous to the overall health of the body. A nutritionist can help you with this. If you are a beginner, to exercise by putting your body through intense regimes can also be dangerous for your health. Always seek medical advice prior to commencing a training program. To lose a large amount of weight in a week you would need to exercise at an intense level for around four hours a day. Here is a list of activity ideas that you could perform throughout your week.
Day 1: Hiking with weight
Go for a long hike for up to four hours. Carry a backpack loaded with sand bags and watch the fat melt away.
Day 2: Intense cardio boxing
Intense cardio boxing is a great cardiovascular workout. This helps to create a large enough energy deficit to burn fat deposits. The more intense the cardio session the more noticeable increase you will see with regards to your metabolic rate. An increased metabolism means an easier time losing weight, and the great news is there are many boxing studios to get you started. Try boxing for two hours in the morning and two hours in the afternoon until you reach your four hour training requirement.
DAY 3: Sandbag workouts
This is a great cardio and weight training session all rolled into one. It creates strength, endurance and power and gives you a total body workout. Just perform simple exercises doing 10 to 30 repetitions but while carrying a sandbag. These exercises can be squats, lunges, reverse lunges, walking lunges, shoulder press, bicep curls, power walking with the sandbag held above your head, and wall sits. Choose whatever exercises you like doing and repeat the circuit at least 10 times. The weight of the sandbag will depend on the individual. Also in between the circuits go for run without the sandbag. You will feel the difference this makes. Once again perform two hours in the morning and two hours in the afternoon until you have reached four hours.
Fitness | wellbeing
fast
DAY 4: Interval training
Perform each of the following exercises for 20 seconds and then rest for 10 seconds – hill sprints, walking lunges, jumping squats, tyre flipping, stationary cycling, sit ups, push ups, boxing, planks. Ensure you remain at a high intensity. Continue with your circuit for 30 minutes then go for a 30-minute jog. Repeat to perform two hours in the morning and two hours in the afternoon.
DAY 5: Put the whole week together
Combine the activities from the first four days into two sessions of two hours in a day: • Hiking with weight 1 hour • Intense cardio boxing for 1 hour • Sand bag workout for 1 hour • Interval training for 1 hour
DAY 6: Try a mini triathlon
Mix up your training with running, cycling and swimming in the gym or outside. Perform two hours in the morning and two hours in the afternoon.
Day 7: Rest.
Your body needs rest and you’ve earned it.
A note of caution
While this kind of program can be done safely, negative side effects such as nausea, constipation, diarrhoea, gallstones and fatigue may occur if you are not careful. Remember that by depriving your body of what it needs you are essentially leaving yourself open to lots of issues and compromising your body’s natural immune system, so be sure to consult a nutritionist before undergoing a program of this nature. Any weight that is lost in an unhealthy manner is prone to come back on once you start eating ‘normally’again.
Amanda Preece is an experienced personal trainer, yoga teacher, weight loss consultant and founder of AP Health and Fitness. She maintains a growing popularity in the fitness industry and a rapidly expanding client base. Amanda has dedicated her life to exploring and promoting pathways to women’s wellbeing and empowerment. www.aphealthandfitness.com
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Enjoy some time out for yourself with these new inspiring and motivational books.
You
The Emotional Life of Your Brain Richard Davidson, Hachette, $29.99
This groundbreaking book by a pioneer in neuroscience brings a new understanding of our emotions - why each of us responds so differently to the same life events and what we can do to change and improve our emotional lives. Just as we all have our own DNA, so we each have our own emotional ‘style’ depending on our individual levels of dimensions like resilience, attention and self-awareness. Helping us to recognise our own emotional style, Davidson also shows how our brain patterns can change over our lives - and, through his fascinating experiments, what we can do to improve our emotional responses.
You
Extraordinary You By Vanessa Talbot with Ghania Dib, The Publishing Queen, $29.95
WIf you could live every day in a Spirited, Luscious, Vital, Vibrant Way, then imagine how Extraordinary your Life would be…In Extraordinary You uncover: how to live in the moment for a joy-filled life; when to say Yes by listening to your inner voice; why living in passion for your own true path is the right choice for you; how to break through anxiety and fear to live in confidence and fulfillment; how to create wonderful relationships that enhance your life; and the secret keys to re-design your life and create a new exciting outlook for your Future. (www.livelovethrive.com.au)
consumer group. They are by far the most powerful Female consumers are not a ‘niche’. in consumer spending. Globally, they control $20 trillion
PURS ESTR INGS NEW, PROVEN WAYS OF REACHING
THE HEARTS AND MINDS OF FEMALE
CONSUMERS
Business
PurseStrings By Amanda Stevens and Thomas Jordan, Self Published, $24.95
The concept of Marketing to Women is not new. But many brands are still failing to embrace the proven principles of reaching and connecting with female consumers. Two of the world’s most recognised thought leaders on the subject have joined forces in this explosive look at why brands and organisations are failing to connect with the consumer segment making the majority of purchase decisions – women. PurseStrings reveals new, proven ways to reach women and lifts the lid on some of the advertising industry’s most guarded secrets.
AMANDA STEVENS & THOMAS JORDAN Author of SheMarketing & SheSelling
Author of Re-Render the Gender
Wellbeing
Better Living with…IBS Nuno Ferreira & David T Gillanders, Exisle Publishing, $29.95
IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) affects approximately 20% of the population and the bad news is there is no cure. Better Living With... IBS provides sufferers with a fully comprehensive program to managing their IBS based on the highly respected psychological approach known as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). This book is structured in a simple, user-friendly workbook format, and includes numerous practical exercises to help you implement the approach effectively in your life.
Career/Business
Inspiring Courageous Leaders Mandy Holloway, Self Published, $34.95
Mandy Holloway draws on personal experience, in-depth business understanding, real business application and passion to inspire others to be Courageous Leaders. With individuals inspired to be courageous leaders you create organisational capacity for a higher performing culture and a united population of courageous leaders, with one voice, one message and one purpose. Stakeholders everywhere are looking for leaders to be courageous in what they do, what they say and how they lead.
Feature | finance
World
Around the
2011 was a year with volatile sharemarkets as investors once again became increasingly concerned about developments in Europe. So why should we believe that markets will improve in 2012?
W
ith investor sentiment changing so rapidly in reaction to political developments in Europe investors are largely ignoring the strength of underlying company profits which do not change markedly from day-to-day. Before you pull all your money out of shares consider these two important factors. The first is that sharemarkets are forward looking. Current share prices already reflect the negative outlook. A further downwards adjustment in the market would only be driven by severe deterioration in that outlook. Secondly and most importantly, the big Australia listed companies are generally in great shape with good earnings, healthy balance sheets and lean, productive operations. The long-term prospects for Australian companies like BHP and Commonwealth Bank of Australia (CBA) are strong. Although their prospects have not deteriorated over the past few months, their share prices have declined and the same is true globally with Nestle, GE, Apple and Wal-Mart (among a host of companies that continue to do well). It will be the performance of these and similar companies that will drive sharemarkets over the medium term.
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What is actually happening in Europe?
There are significant concerns about how the Government debt crisis will be managed and what this will mean for economic growth in Europe. A recession in Europe is probable but it is the intensity that is hard to forecast. These concerns have also been magnified by the complex challenges faced
by policymakers to develop and implement a co-ordinated and effective response. Whilst the debt concerns initially focussed on smaller countries such as Greece and Portugal, we have seen these worries spread to larger nations such as Italy and this is why investors are reacting with such heightened sensitivity to news from Europe. European leaders have agreed, in principal, to measures that will help stabilise the situation and appear to be making meaningful progress. Parliamentary changes in Italy, Spain and Greece are also showing signs that the political will to drive necessary changes is strengthening. The issues in Europe are complex and we should prepare ourselves for further news flow, both positive and negative, to drive consumer sentiment in the short term.
What about the US?
The US Federal Reserve continues to believe that the US economic growth can maintain a moderate pace over the medium term. They are committed to supporting the economy with low interest rates to help with the high unemployment rates and weak housing prices that continue to have a negative impact on consumer sentiment. Large companies in the US appear to be in very good shape; now looking to invest and employ people to take advantage of growth opportunities in emerging economies. However they too are holding back while they wait for the politicians to put in place policies that will reinvigorate the US economy.
If these problems are all offshore then why isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the Australian sharemarket doing better?
The Australian economy is well positioned with low unemployment and good underlying company fundamentals, even though activity in some sectors is quite subdued. Australiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s exposure to the fast growing Asian economies is underpinning our own economy and whilst these should be positive influences for Australia they are being overshadowed by events occurring in Europe and the US. As share prices are currently low relative to fundaments there is a good case for shares to produce above-average returns over the medium term even in an environment where growth in the US and Europe is below average. Investors need to remember that bouts of volatility are nothing new. It has always been part of the investment landscape. It will be how you react to them that makes the difference. Investors who stick with their investment strategy will be well placed when the focus of investors returns to the underlying strength of companies. History shows that when sentiment turns positive after a period of pessimism, the majority of gains in the market are made in the early days of recovery. Investors who stick with their plan will automatically participate in the upswing. *This article has been written by ipac securities limited ABN 30 008 587 595 AFS Licence No 234656 and is of a general nature only, it does not take into account your personal situation or objectives.
Theresa Chapman is a Certified Financial Planner focussed on helping women improve their financial literacy and achieve financial security. For more information email tcc@sppgroup.com or visit www.sppgroup.com 53
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finances | Property
Wake up Superannuation your Wake up your lazy super and take advantage of rules allowing you to purchase property in your superannuation fund. Rachel Barnes from Property Women speaks to the experts to find out more.
D
o you ever wonder whether your superannuation would be more valuable invested elsewhere? If you’re like most people, you wonder this often but don’t know what to do about it. For most people, superannuation is locked away in a managed fund somewhere, never to be seen until retirement. But since federal government legislative changes in 2007, not only is your superannuation fund a way to ensure your family’s financial stability after retirement, but they can also supercharge your investing power. Borrowing through a SMSF is a complex process and involves setting up a separate trust structure within the SMSF. Your superannuation is then rolled into the SMSF, which buys the property on your behalf and secures the loan. Although initially it’s complex experts agree it’s worthwhile. Financial services expert, Michael Cassidy of The Partners Group was recently quoted as saying, ‘’When you actually crunch the numbers on doing it [investing] in super versus … negative gearing, it’s still worth it for probably 95 per cent of people to do it through super” and argues it’s particularly useful for people who have repaid their home and are starting to focus on investment. ‘’At that point you haven’t got that long towards retirement and one of the other great strategies is it actually allows you to accelerate the growth on your super, subject to buying a quality property, because you’re gearing inside your fund.’’ “One of the primary reasons to use an SMSF to invest, is it means you don’t have to part with ‘cash’ to pay the deposit
Autumn 2012
to purchase an investment property,” says Nic Ellis, a Self-Managed Super Fund (SMSF) specialist from The 2020 Group, a dedicated firm set up to assist accountants and advisors to guide their clients on property in SMSF’s. “The deposit can come directly out of the SMSF and not out of your purse.” SMSF’s can use cash as a deposit to leverage into Australian property. In addition, 80% LVR loans within an SMSF structure are legally available, which allows Australians to make property a significant asset class within their own family superannuation structure.
Tax Benefits
The tax benefits that the wealthy have had at their disposal for the last 30 years are now available to the majority of Australians. Property can be purchased in a tax structure that is often below the ‘tax line.’ Rental returns and capital growth may be naturally tax-free in this structure. Once the super member is of the right age (currently 55) the SMSF can be turned into a superannuation tax haven. Anything purchased prior to this age is quarantined to be tax-free. “There are major advantages to the SMSF having the property held in the concessional tax environment of super,” says Thor McDowell, head of The 2020 Groups’ Financial Planning division. “Once the property is in the superannuation environment, capital gains tax and rent are taxed at a lower rate. When the fund moves to pension phase, the income from the property and capital gain on the eventual sale are tax-free.”
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SMSF’s effect on the property market
Investing with SMSFs is definitely an area of opportunity to get into the property market and grow their portfolio without using cash out of their pocket. More and more, people are realising the profit potential of doing this. In addition, Michael Canty, Managing Director of Homes Guide and a long-time property industry veteran, believes SMSF’s will be the new driver in the market place. “Investors will hopefully alleviate the rental shortage,” he continues, “I believe as more average Australians become aware of this information, they will steer away from the large managed funds and take more control of their superannuation. People are sick of the ups and downs of the equity markets and Australia has one of the strongest property and financial markets in the world.” In addition, most Australian’s affinity with property is strong and Canty believes they will utilise the benefits to buy more property through their SMSF. “SMSF’s will gain more popularity in coming years as savvy property investors became more aware that it’s actually cheaper to buy and hold property this way,” he notes. “More accountants and financial advisors will be suggesting this vehicle to their clients, especially in the 3555 age bracket, as it is far more tax effective to build retirement assets this way.”
Statistics about SMSF’s
Nic Ellis provides the following mindboggling statistics: • There are more the 430,000 SMSF’s in 2012 and it’s growing rapidly!
Property | finances
• More than 250,000 Australians have made the shift to be part of an SMSF in the last three years. • SMSF’s account for more super than any other sector with over 30% of the 1.2 trillion super dollars held. • The number of people under 35 choosing to set up an SMSF more than doubled last quarter. • More than 72% of respondents plan to switch to an SMSF in the near future and property is the clear leader when it comes to assets classes chosen, with more than 91% saying they would look to take advantage of borrowing laws and invest in residential property, according to the December 2011 Survey of Smart Property Investments.
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Retirement Benefits
Ellis says the numbers speak for themselves. “It’s an opportunity that savvy investors in property are taking by storm,” he says. “Imagine being able to look after your superannuation at the same time as investing into your preferred asset class of property. It’s the Australian way – 86% of Australian families prefer property to shares!” “The government has made it easier to borrow to buy property, which will improve the diversification of SMSF’s as well”, Ellis adds. An SMSF is a long-term investment vehicle; property is a long-term capital growth and income asset. “There has always been criticism that SMSFs are mainly invested in shares and cash but this was due to the fact that SMSFs haven’t been able to diversify into direct property. Prior to government changes it was difficult to build up enough cash to buy property and still have enough money to buy something else,” Ellis reiterated. “Now there is a chance to get good solid incomeproducing assets into funds.” Many people in their 50s are seeing leverage in their SMSF as a means to pay down debt levels before retirement by investing in high-growth properties with a view to sell without the tax burden of Capital Gains Tax (CGT) when they do sell. “Imagine you’re 55 and you have a $600,000 mortgage on your own
home,” McDowell says. “You can buy a residential investment property with good growth over 10 years if you buy the right property. You’d expect that to double or more. In fact, it should double in value in about seven or eight years. At the end of that period, you’re retired, you’re in pension phase, the super fund can sell that property and the capital gain out of it is tax-free. That gain can then be used to pay out the home loan and you can retire comfortably, without a home loan that would otherwise still be sitting there.”
Borrowing in an SMSF to kickstart stalled portfolios
Also interested in borrowing in an SMSF, McDowell says, are investors who have “hit the wall” with their borrowing-buying capacity and see SMSF as a means to kick-start stalled portfolios in a highly tax-effective environment. Alternatively, it could be investors fed up with falling super fund balances who see property as a means to restore their fortune. Or they might simply be frustrated with poor performance from fund managers and see an SMSF as a vehicle to take control of their investments. “I think the property borrowing strategy will bring in a whole lot of new people who want to put money into super,” says Barnes. “Both younger and older people are saying, ‘Well, if I can buy property, I’ll keep on putting money into super.’ We have found this rings true after seeing a steady increase in support for SMSF as a legitimate way to purchase property.”
less super than men? We see our role at Property Women to educate as well as provide support and inspiration to women to help transform their lives. It’s an opportunity to take a love of property investing and couple it with a structure that has significant tax benefits, and it’s closing the gender gap in ‘women versus men’ when it comes to superannuation. We believe that education is the catalyst that pushes women to confidently transform their lives. This transformation begins with them grasping the knowledge of property investing. Property investment is not something only understood and pursued by men, but women can also take control of their own finances and successfully invest in property. Rachel Barnes is the Managing Director of Property Women, an organisation devoted to helping women transform their lives through property, by providing independent education, inspiration and networking. She is a regular speaker on property and has an investment property portfolio of 72 rentals across Australia, New Zealand and the USA. www. propertywomen.com.au
Closing the gender cap in women versus men superannuation
Did you know women have on average 64%
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finances | Feature
Renting shares for
Take advantage of opportunities to profit. Lyn Summers uses her expertise in rental sharing to teach you how to effectively control your own financial future.
T
he stock market can be a very daunting and scary place for many new investors. Fear spreads across many people’s faces pretty quickly when I mention that I am a share trader, and with good reason. Many people have come out worse for wear, or known someone who has been burnt. The truth is fear comes from the unknown. If you don’t understand how something works, it is natural to find it strange and even scary. A fashion designer will know the ins and outs of creating a perfect garment, because they have taken the time to learn and acquired the skills. With investing, it is perfectly natural to be wary as you have not taken the time to learn. However, the downside to this is that, when it comes to our finances, we often put our hard earned savings in the trust of financial experts, because they know what they are doing right? They work in the industry, they should have the skills. Well that is where you need to be careful. The Global Financial Crisis wiped out 28 billion dollars in one day. The baby boomer’s retirement funds got hit hard, and most are still down at around 50% losses. The baby boomers are being forced to re-think their strategies for retirement – perhaps selling the family home or cutting spending in areas of their lives. It is important to stop and think about whether your superfund will be enough for your retirement? Unfortunately, chances are it won’t be.
Autumn 2012
PROFIT
Learning from the Master
One man that hasn’t got this worry is Warren Buffet. Have you ever wondered why he has been so successful at investing in the stock market? Buffet is widely regarded as one of the most successful investors in the world, and it certainly isn’t through chance. Investing is all about strategy. Let me share one of the ways he has been creating an income, and you don’t need an MBA to understand it, or tens of thousands of dollars to invest. After reading his biography many years ago and learning what he was doing with his shares, I went to America to learn how I could also do this. Buffet had a share portfolio that he was renting out – exactly the way you would rent out an investment property, he was doing this with his shares and returning 5-10% per month. This strategy is known as writing covered calls. Warren Buffet’s last 5 billion dollar investment in 2009 made him a fortune in just one year. I became very curious about this strategy, as I had owned rental properties all my life. I was excited to discover that you can purchase shares much cheaper than real estate, and selling them is instantaneous, not like waiting for a buyer with selling a house - the money is in your bank the same day. One of the first companies Warren Buffet bought was Coca Cola – he now owns 20% of the company. He rented the shares out on a monthly basis, which lowered his cost basis over time and created a monthly income stream. He buys and sells options on companies, these are known as contracts and they follow the parent stock price rise. Purchasing a call option contract is like a layby, you put down a 10% deposit that
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you either use or lose. He currently has a new one, which I am copying and the shares are very cheap at under $10 per share. Options are so versatile, as you can benefit from a stock prices’ rise without having to put up the full amount of the share price. You only need approx 10% capital.
The ins and outs of rental sharing
When Warren Buffet bought Coca Cola they were trading at $40 per share 1000 shares you would need $40,000 capital to put up but at only 10% capital, that’s only $4,000. (The minimum investment is 100 shares which is $400 in capital) In other words, if you purchase a call option contract at the $40 price this gives you the right but not the obligation (use it or lose it) to purchase the shares at $40.00 for the time period you choose, anywhere up to 3 ½ years long. So when Coca Cola shares rose to $60 the call contract was worth $20.00, to sell it cost $4.00, it increases in value dollar for dollar above $40. This is not a bad rate of return. This strategy allows you to invest with a smaller amount of money and increases your buying power, allowing you to do more with your money. Let’s say you purchased Coca Cola shares today and pay $40.00 per share, the $40 call option is priced at $4.00. If you consider the previous call option contract bought by Warren Buffet, he becomes the seller and receives the $4.00 from the buyer and now He now owns the shares at a cost of $36.00 per share after receiving
Feature | finances
the $4.00 he continues to do this monthly, until eventually the shares cost him zero. If you bought 100 shares our investment is $4,000 and you receive $400 a month a way of creating a regular monthly income. We may not be able to do this on the same scale, but we can tailor this strategy for our portfolio size. I retired from cleaning using this strategy by setting up a rental portfolio that took me only a couple of hours each month to maintain it.
My start in the business
I teach many strategies, including this one, to improve women’s financial literacy and help them to achieve financial security. Eleven years ago I knew nothing about the stock market but I wanted to learn, so I took 3 months leave from my busy cleaning business and moved to Wall Street to take a well-known investment course. But I knew I needed to keep learning, so before coming back to Australia I worked in a brokerage office where I gained the experience of working in the world of finance every day. Before moving I loved doing trades like Warren Buffet and being just as successful as he was at investing. However, what changed my life was when I stepped out of my comfort zone and gained enough confidence to move to America. Anyone can study and acquire the same skills over time. It’s not rocket science but a combination of fierce determination, practice and commitment. I left school at 15 and had no university education or finance knowledge behind me, but I did have the passion to learn. I had spent the better part of my life cleaning, and after being diagnosed with cancer I knew I needed to make a change in my life and find a way around exchanging my time for money.
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Taking back control
After letting my fund manager go, I took control of my own financial freedom many years ago and became my own fund manager, because no one has a better interest in your money and the results than you. Because I was in control, I was saved
from the losses many suffered during the Global Financial Crisis. Since the GFC, 30% of superfunds are now self-managed, which shows you that more people are taking back control of what’s left of their finances and learning the strategies that they can do themselves. In fact, one of the most exciting things about the stock market is that it is the only place where you can make a profit from something that falls in price, and it is not as hard as you might think! When the market was crashing in 2008, it wasn’t all doom and gloom. Many people, including myself and many of my clients, were able to profit from the fall, thanks to call options. To put it simply, you can use an option to insure your shares, just like we insure our cars and houses. Those that had insurance during the crash were protected from any losses. Let me explain it this way, imagine buying a share and having it insured at a set price that will protect you in case of a drop in stocks or bankruptcy, and then also receiving monthly rent. We give a little bit of our rent money back to insure our shares so that now we can sleep at night and grow a rental portfolio with shares. Besides, when you rent shares you don’t have to worry about keeping up with repairs or late rental payments. This makes it a major benefit to your financial success. I encourage you to invest some time in getting educated, there is a wealth of free resources available online, from blogs to articles and webinars. We need to be prepared for whatever the future will hold, not only to protect ourselves, but also to be able to take advantage of opportunities to profit. Lyn Summers is one of Australia’s most compelling speakers on the share market. As well as training thousands of people to explode their trading potential, she has been a trader for 11 years. She has traded every strategy in the market through recessions and recoveries, and has made consistent, compounding profits. Lyn.summers@stockcourse.net
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coaching toolkit
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Coach yourself to success
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AUTUMN 2012 www.empoweronline.com.au
LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE week 1
Set Your Goals
AREAS OF YOUR LIFE
Date:
Welcome to your first coaching session and congratulations for taking the first step to improving your life. In this first session you will be setting two inspiring goals for different areas of your life. Using the coaching models provided, complete the following exercises.
Where are you now?
On the chart, rate yourself on a scale of 0 - 10 in relation to where you feel you are at in each area of your life right now. Then, draw a line around the chart, joining the dots where you have marked your rating in each area. partner 10
family
eg.
6
7
2
3 4 wellbeing
finances
A ‘10’ means you consider that area is perfect and a ‘0’ means major improvement is needed.
social
0
PARTNER Think about this area in the context of whether you’re single or in a relationship. If you’re in a relationship, it refers to how you feel about your life with your partner. Is your relationship what you want it to be? If you’re single, think about your level of satisfaction with being single. Some people would love a committed relationship and others are content as they are. How do 6 you feel?
7
FAMILY This area refers to how you 5 feel about your relationships with family members. The rating you give this area should be an average for all family 2 relationships. While some will be strong, others may not be so good.
5
wellbeing
business/career
Where do you want to be?
spirituality
Next, give yourself a rating in relation to where you want to be in each area of your life in the next 1 - 2 months. Again, use a scale of 0 - 10 and draw a line around the chart, joining the dots where you have marked your rating in each area. Don’t be afraid to dream a little but consider what you can realistically achieve in that time. There’s no need to aim for a perfect 10 in any or every area. partner 10
family
self
Imagine your life with these results
SOCIAL Similarly, this area refers to how you feel about your relationships 4 with friends and your satisfaction with your level of social/fun activity. Again, provide an average rating of your relationships and social activity. WELLBEING This is your overall sense of wellbeing and how you feel about your health & fitness. SPIRITUALITY If you’re a spiritual or religious person, this area refers to your level of connectedness with your beliefs. If you’re not spiritual or religious, think about your level of contentment with life in general.
6
eg.
BUSINESS/CAREER This area considers 7 the level of success and/or fulfilment5 you feel in relation to your business, career or current employment.
5
finances
8
2
3
10
social
0
5
2
FINANCES This final area refers to how you feel about your level of financial freedom and/or your progression2 3 towards your desired level of financial freedom.
4
wellbeing
business/career 10
spirituality Autumn 2012
SELF This is your relationship with yourself. Consider how much love, appreciation, acceptance and respect you have for yourself.
eg.
5
8
2
social
family
self
5
Use this goal-setting tool over the next three months to achieve your goals and improve your life. Set the dates for your coaching sessions and let’s get started.
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8
Creating your goal Now it’s time to create your goals. To begin with, choose one area of your life that you would like to improve. Say it’s ‘Partner’ and you want to go from a rating of 4 to 8. Using the goal template over the page, create a written goal outlining what that new rating means to you - perhaps it’s about finding a soulmate or re-connecting with your husband.
Every goal that you write should be an emPOWER goal. Think about the emPOWER principles as you go through the process
Wellbein
It is the 30 g I feel so ha t h Ju n e 2012 and what I haveppy and proud of reached my achieved. I have 60kgs and I goal weight of am fit, healt look fantastic. I much more hy and have so fit into that energy. Now I can and I feel fasexy black dress bulous.
Write your goal in the present tense, as if you’ve already achieved it. Make it meaningful, including some strong emotions, and make sure your goal is inspiring to you. Use only positive words and be specific – focus on what you do want instead of what you don’t want. Be a little realistic (but not too much) about what you can achieve in the timeframe chosen. Remember, too, your goal needs to be your own, not a goal to change someone else. You can only take responsibility for improving yourself and your life.
Goal 1
Write your goal
Fill in the spaces below to create your first goal. Remember, you’re writing in the present tense and be positive - with the right attitude you’ll get where you want to be much faster. What you want [Date] [Emotion1] [Emotion 2] to achieve It is .............................. and I feel so ................................................... and ....................................................... I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... Now I/We........................................................................................................................................................................... and I feel............................................................................................................................................................................. Why you want to achieve it [Emotion3]
Goal 2
Write your goal
Fill in the spaces below to create your first goal. Remember, you’re writing in the present tense and be positive – with the right attitude you’ll get where you want to be much faster. It is .............................. and I feel so ............................................................. and .............................................................. I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... I/We................................................................................................................................................................................... Now I/We...........................................................................................................................................................................
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and I feel.............................................................................................................................................................................
Required action: Your only action for the next week is to read your goals every day. Read them out loud and, as you read each one, experience how you will feel when you have achieved what you want. This is called visualisation and is an important step in the goalsetting process – visualise your goals as if you have already achieved them.
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week 2
Making it Happen
Date:
Now that you’ve been reading your goals for a week, consider whether you need to change or add anything to your goals to make them even more meaningful and inspiring. In this session, it’s time to start setting (and doing) the actions necessary to achieve each goal.
Required action: 1. If necessary, add to or change your goals. 2. On the action sheet provided, make a list of the actions you need to take in the next two weeks to get closer to your goals. Remember, these are your goals and you’re responsible for the actions, so be as detailed as you can. 3. Choose a motivational book to read or course to attend to expand your learning. 4. Continue to read and visualise your goals everyday.
Goal 1 Action
Completed
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Goal 2 Action
Completed
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Autumn 2012
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week 4
Date:
Reflect on your goals and actions. Are you achieving what you’d planned to by this time? If you feel that you’ve lost some motivation for achieving your goals, or that you aren’t getting any closer to achieving them, it’s quite normal for people to experience this at some stage during the coaching process. To give you a reminder, and a shot of motivation, do the first action suggested below. Consider your results from the last two weeks. Have you completed all of your actions? If not, what got in your way? What can you do differently to prevent the same outcome in the next two weeks? If you’ve completed all of your actions, perhaps you can now push yourself a little harder.
Required action: 1. Meet with a friend or partner and share your goals with them. Explain to them all the reasons why you want to achieve each goal and how it inspires you. Ask them to hold you accountable. 2. On a new piece of paper, set some new specific actions for each goal over the next two weeks. Remember to challenge yourself. Anything worth achieving may be a little uncomfortable. 3. Continue to read and visualise your goals every day.
week 6
Date:
Hopefully you are well on your way to achieving your goals. If not, you may need to consider adjusting your goal date a little. This is normal and can happen for numerous reasons. You may have underestimated the time it would take, you may have gotten off track, or perhaps you may need to be more strict with yourself in taking actions. Remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes. It is up to you to achieve your goals.
Required action: 1. Adjust your date if necessary. 2. For each goal, make a list of 20 reasons why you want to achieve the goal. Remind yourself of how good you will feel and how life will be different. 3. On a new piece of paper, make a list of the actions you need to take in the next two weeks to get you closer to your goal. Remember to challenge yourself. 4. Decide on one nice thing you are going to buy or do to celebrate achieving your goal. 5. Continue to read and visualise your goal every day.
week 8
Date:
Well done for making it to Week 8 and congratulations if you have achieved any of your goals. If not, don’t lose hope, things sometimes just take longer than initially expected. Either way, it’s important to celebrate how far you have come.
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Required action: 1. Celebrate your success to date. Do something nice or buy yourself your chosen gift. 2. If you have adjusted your goal date, continue to set actions every two weeks and read your goal every day. 3. If you’ve achieved your goal, get ready to set some more goals and start again at Week 1.
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change your life in 15 minutes
15 Tips from our readers
and experts to improve your life in 15 minutes 2. 15 minutes is a million moments - a million moments to be fully present in deep appreciation of being alive, of savouring the ride, and expecting more deliciousness one moment after another. Your life is not improved in minutes, or hours or even days, but in the precious moment of NOW. Zoe Routh, Inner Compass
1. Believe that you can!
Rachel Barnes, Property Women
3. What you focus on is what you get to the exclusion of everything else. If you are feeling sad choose to say I am ‘doing’ sad rather then ‘feeling’ sad. This puts you at cause and you take responsibility for the fact you have put yourself in this state. Your focus, state and the fact that you can change them at will have the ability to improve your experience of life. Natasa Denman, The Ultimate Weight Loss Coach
4. Stop making excuses, take back control, and start NOW! Theresa Chapman, Strategic Planning Partners 6. Think about what you are tolerating in your life right now.
5. Simple…Smile! Smile at anyone and everyone. People can’t help
Make a list of everything, big and small - from the squeaky door that simply needs oiling to the phone call you should make because you put it off yesterday (or last week), to the commitment you made that you haven’t followed through on yet. Then, take action on one of those tolerations immediately. It feels great! Jane Jackson, Style Success.
but to smile back at you and not only will you improve your life, you’ll improve their life as well. Tanya Greenacre
7. Make a list of 50 things you are grateful for, from obvious things
like family, friends and the ability to see to the less obvious. Keep the list closeby and when the going gets tough refer to it for an instant uplift. Sally-Anne Blanshard, Nourish Coaching.
8. Step aside from what you’re doing and give yourself a 15-minute break. Get out into the sunshine. Sit in a park. Walk slowly. Breathe deeply. Do whatever it takes to bring your attention fully into the moment. Reconnect with a sense of calm. We all have it within us. We just need to slow down and remind ourselves that it’s as close by as a few deep breaths. Kate James, The Change Project
9. Review, Recharge and Refocus... Review a goal you achieved in
the last six months and consider why and how you achieved it. Then, think about what you last did to Recharge yourself, why you did it and how it made you feel. Finally, Refocus and determine your next goal and your next ‘recharge’. Set the dates by which you will achieve them (within next 6 months). In 15 minutes you will feel like you are in control and not just on life’s treadmill. Arrow Insurance Consultant Services Pty Ltd
10. Sit for five minutes and write down as many answers as you can to ‘What lights me up?’ Ensure it’s about you and not things to please someone else. Then, spend 10 minutes considering what you could do today from that list. Retrain your decision making processes to always choose to do those things that light you up the most! Success is easy when you discover the ease and thrill of being an incredible you! Lysa and Gina, The Weigh to Freedom
11. Get a haircut. I know it sounds a little silly but having a haircut
can be a cleansing experience. Imagine that each snip of the scissors is cutting something negative from your life. It’s falling on the ground never to affect you again. Jodie Altas
.13. Whenever you need inspiration, motivation or a boost of encouragement, write down 10 positive things that are currently working well in your life. This keeps the mind distracted from the negative by allowing it to concentrate on the positive and by the time you reach number eight or nine you’ll already feel better. Emanuela Pannone, 108 Life Tiles
15. Have a bath. Even fifteen minutes relaxing in a warm bath by candlelight is enough to let go of the challenges of the day, change your outlook and improve your life. Susan Hayman
Autumn 2012
12. Meditation, figuring out what is most important to you
by way of identifying your highest personal values and writing down some dreams/goals that you would like to achieve are three that come to mind. Jo Thompson, Destiny by Choice
14. Ensure you say something nice to yourself everyday. Remember, your self-talk affects your self-esteem and confidence. Dr Vesna Grubacevic,Quantum Transformations
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Australia’s First Bank for families. Things you should know: *www.lifewise.org.au/NATSEM Underinsurance Report 2010. For every new Westpac Protection Plans or BT Protection Plans application submitted to a Westpac Financial Planner from 1 March to 15 April 2012 inclusive, where the policy is issued by 31 May 2012, free Children’s Benefit cover is provided for the Insured Person’s children aged between 2 and 14 inclusive, with a $25,000 sum insured per child. To take up this offer, the Children’s Benefit cover must be applied for at the same time as the primary policy. The cover is subject to the terms and conditions set out in the relevant Product Disclosure Statement and Policy Document (PDS), including that the primary policy must meet the minimum specified sum insured. The Insurer is Westpac Life Insurance Services Limited ABN 31 003 149 157. The issuer for all products, except for Term Life as Superannuation, is the Insurer. For Term Life as Superannuation, which is part of the Superannuation Division of Westpac MasterTrust ABN 81 236 903 448 SFN 281 412 940, SPIN WFS0341AU, RSE R1003970 (Westpac MasterTrust), the issuer is Westpac Securities Administration Limited ABN 77 000 049 472 (WSAL). Protection Plans are distributed by Westpac Banking Corporation ABN 33 007 457 141 (the Bank). The Insurer and WSAL are wholly owned subsidiaries of the Bank. Protection Plans are not investments in, deposits with, or liabilities of the Bank. Neither the Bank nor any member of the Westpac Group (other than the Insurer and WSAL) guarantees the benefits payable in relation to Protection Plans. This information has been prepared without taking into consideration your objectives, financial situation or needs. Before making a decision in relation to Protection Plans, you should consider the relevant PDS by calling 131 817 or visiting westpac.com.au or a Westpac Financial Planner. © 2012 Westpac Banking Corporation ABN 33 007 457 141 AFSL and ACL 233714. (03/12) WRA0342_E