SHE | January 2018

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January

2018

New Year, New Beginnings Four locals share their fresh starts

Also Inside

Berry Tart Metallic Home Accents 24 Things


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January 2018

Amanda Hummer has been teaching yoga since 2014.

2 She Magazine // january 2018

Photo by april knox


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January 17, 2018

©2018 by AIM Media Indiana. All rights reserved. Reproduction of stories, photographs and advertisements without permission is prohibited. Stock images provided by © iStock.

New Beginnings

8 Carnivale, Community

Dancing with the Stars — Columbus Style

10 Memory gifts 12 Succulents 14 Metallics 16 Ultra violet 24 A light dinner 28 Valentine messages

EDITOR

How do you rejuvenate?

Jenny Elig I hit the gym. Designer

Margo Wininger COPY EDITOR

Katharine Smith

Crafts

Contributing WRITERS

Sara McAninch, Katie Glick, Grace Kestler, Katie Willett, I get a massage Glenda Winders, or spa treatment. Catherine Winkler

GARDEn

home trends

Contributing photographer

April Knox

trends

cuisine

she designs

Advertising art director

Amanda Waltz I rejuvenate by washing my face every morning.

Advertising Design

Dondra Brown, John Cole, Ashley Curry, Julie Daiker, Jessica Dell, Cassie Doles, Kassi Hattabaugh, Josh Meyer, Tina Ray, Robert Wilson ADVERTISING INFORMATION

29 30 31 32 4 6

(812) 379-5652

she writes

The View from Abroad Transplanted Spouse First Comes Love

SEND COMMENTS TO

Jenny Elig, The Republic, 2980 N. National Road, Columbus, IN 47201. Email shemagazine@aimmediaindiana.com

The Farmer’s Daughter Editor’s note Things to Do

on the cover Christina Huang photographed by April Knox. January 2018 // She Magazine 3


» editor’s note

A

Being Two-Faced for the New Year

Although it turns out that January was probably not named for the two-faced god of duality, Janus, I still associate him with the month. The god of doorways, transitions, duality, passage and endings, one of Janus’ faces looks toward the past and the other, of course, to the future. I imagine the face on the left kvetching about all the things that happened, harping on Right Janus’ every movement. Left Janus is older, wiser and more experienced. Right Janus is certain the future holds all the wonderful things; Right Janus is forgetful, young and listens to power punk bands from Canada. An evening at the Janus household goes something like this: “Oh, no, no,” Left Janus says. “Remember the last time you ate pizza? You shoved the whole thing into your mouth while I ate a salad, and we were at the gym every night for a week trying to fix that mess you got us into. Five pounds!” “Whatever,” Right Janus says, arranging a napkin on their shared lap as he forces their body

SAVE the DATE

JANUARY 28, 2018 The Republic's 23rd Annual

Bridal Show

The Commons, Columbus 1pm-4pm

4 She Magazine // january 2018


Check out past issues of She magazine at

have (one for most of us, although there are some exceptions), the older, more experienced selves who live with us whisper kind reminders and gentle thoughts of encouragement to the fresher, newer face. And Right Janus is receptive. They know how to talk to each other; after all, they’ve lived together since the beginning of time. “Hey, man,” Left Janus begins. He feels Right Janus tense up a little. “Are you sure we should skip the gym tonight? I mean, we want to hit our targets, and the journey starts with the first step. And that first step is on the treadmill. I know we can do it.” Right Janus relaxes a little. Left Janus is just trying to help. “Dude, you’re right,” he says. “I’ll lace up our shoes.”

Jenny Elig

jelig@aimmediaindiana.com

TR-32013324

onto the couch, clicks on the TV and opens a pizza box. He’s a forgetful deity. “You only live once! Yolo, man!” “Untrue,” Left Janus replies. “We’ve been around since the world was just chaos, and some day — some day — you are going to realize that we can’t eat like we did back at Augustus’ Saturnalia celebration!” “Listen, dude,” Right Janus fires back, getting heated. “We’ll just spend 10 more minutes on the treadmill tomorrow.” “But that never works,” Left Janus says, practically crying. “You say that every time, and that’s how we rolled into the New Year with 10 extra pounds!” And it goes on all night, back and forth between the heads, wisdom and age trying to put callow youth in its place. But in truth — or myth, that is — Left Janus is probably a lot kinder than I’m imagining him to be, and Right Janus is a lot more willing to listen and learn from the past. No matter how many faces we

January 2018 // She Magazine 5


Hours in a Day

Things to Do

Compiled by Jenny Elig

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Pro tip

Keep your portion sizes in check during this new year by thinking before eating, advises Harriet Armstrong, Purdue Extension educator. Make a fist: The size is equivalent to the portion for one serving of fruit, cooked vegetable, bowl of cereal with milk or yogurt.

2 See Tony T and Wildman Joe tickle the ivories during “Dueling Pianos: Take 2,” 7 p.m. Jan. 19, The Commons. The show is a 21-and-over event. Information: connect.ivytech.edu/duelingpianos, or ghandley2@ivytech.edu or (812) 374-5342.

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Pro tip

On the off chance that you haven’t stowed away your holiday decorations, here’s a trick: Use empty egg cartons to separate and store your ornaments.

6 She Magazine // january 2018

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24

Curl up with a book. Viewpoint Books staffer Melinda Clark recommends Joshilyn Jackson’s “The Almost Sisters,” a novel about the South, race, single motherhood, friendship, family, loyalty and superheroes.

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Gary Quigg gives a multimedia presentation of the past and recent efforts to find Amelia Earhart on the remote, uninhabited island of Nikumaroro in the South Pacific, 6:30 p.m. Jan. 22 at the Bartholomew County Public Library. Information: mybcpl.org.

If you have questions about microblading and semi-permanent makeup, get answers at a Jan. 23 presentation at the Bartholomew County Public Library. Microblade specialist Sarah Clark speaks at 6:30 p.m. Information: mybcpl.org.

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The Art House in the Red Room Film Series continues at the Bartholomew County Public Library with the 1973 Senegalese film “Touki Bouki,” at 6 p.m. Jan. 24. Information: mybcpl.org.

Learn how to get your body to heal itself. Henry Chiropractic Center’s Becky McRoberts speaks on “Natural Healing,” 6:30 p.m. Jan. 25 at the Bartholomew County Public Library. Information: mybcpl.org.

January is National Genealogy Month. Are you “Just Getting Started?” If so, head to the Bartholomew County Public Library for its presentation of the same name at 2 p.m. Jan. 25. Information: mybcpl.org.

10 See “Adzooks Puppets: Circus of Imagination” during the Columbus Area Arts Council’s First Fridays for Families series, 6 p.m. Feb. 2 at The Commons. Audience participation encouraged. Information: artsincolumbus.org.


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11 Learn how to make a Shaker peg basket, 10 a.m. Feb. 3 at the Bartholomew County Public Library. Information: mybcpl.org.

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Don’t let the cold repel you from rappelling (or any similar activities). Reach great heights at Columbus Rock Gym, 1503 Cottage Ave, Suite G. Information: (812) 799-3193, columbusrockgym.com.

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Feel some togetherness at Community Yoga, 9 a.m. Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, Hamilton Community Center & Ice Arena. This donation-based class is appropriate for all levels. Information: (812) 447-2585; facebook.com/ bodhiblossomyoga.

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If you’re using the cold weather as a reason to read more, check out Viewpoint Books staffer Jenna Hashagen’s recommendation “Little Fires Everywhere,” by Celeste Ng. “This book may seem to be about a perfectly planned suburban neighborhood,” Hashagen writes. “But it quickly unfolds to reveal much more as Ng addresses the racial tensions as well as strenuous family dynamics that simmer beneath the surface of a quiet Ohio town.”

Pro tip

Cheap trick: As you’re heating water for cups of tea, remember that the microwave uses about half the energy as the stove.

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Violinist Ariel Horowitz and soprano Cathy Rund pair with the Columbus Indiana Philharmonic to celebrate the music of love with their “All for Love” concert at 7:30 p.m. Feb. 3 at Columbus North High School auditorium. Tickets $15 to $50. Information: thecip.org.

Catch “Love Letters,” 6 p.m. Feb. 9-10, 16-17 and 1 p.m. Feb. 11 and 14 at Willow Leaves of Hope, 326 Jackson St., Hope. Reservations: (812) 546-0640.

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Join the Columbus Symphony Orchestra for its “Hometown Talent” concert, 3:30 p.m. Feb. 18 at The Commons, featuring the Andrews String Studio and a variety of CSO member soloists. Information: csoindiana.org.

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If you’re pining away for the farmers markets of warmer seasons, dry your tears; you can pick your produce at Columbus City Winter Farmers Market, 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. Saturdays at Fair Oaks Mall. Information: (812) 372-3831, on Facebook @Columbus City Winter Farmers Market.

Declutter or shop at the Donner Center Community Garage Sale. Columbus Parks and Recreation hosts the sale once a month, even during the winter. Admission is free to shoppers. Information: (812) 376-2680, columbusparksandrec.com.

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Pro tip

Still thinking about food portion sizes? A meat serving would be about the size of your palm, and noodles, rice or cooked cereal would be about a handful, Armstrong says. A serving of whole grain bread would be flat-hand size.

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And/or try Yoga of 12-Step Recovery, noon Mondays at Recovery Engagement Center, 1951 McKinley Ave., also a donation-based class. Information: (812) 447-2585.

23 Viewpoint Books staffer Celia AllmanWatts recommends “Caroline,” by Sarah Miller. It’s a novel told from the perspective of Caroline Ingalls of the Little House on the Prairie series.

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Got an item for 24 Things? Email it to jelig@therepublic.com.

January 2018 // She Magazine 7


» community

»

Life is

a Carnivale During its biggest annual fundraiser, kidscommons opens its doors after hours for an adults-only celebration. Globally, Carnivale, which goes by many different names, is the celebration that occurs right before the Lenten season; think of it as your final hurrah before you give up your cherished foods and beverages for Lent. Each year’s party features a different host country; past host countries have included Sweden and France. The Feb. 10 celebration will feature the United States (that’s right: U.S.A.! U.S.A.!). There will be plenty of food, drinks and entertainment at this year’s event. Information: (812) 378-3046, kidscommons.org

8 She Magazine // january 2018


10 A Perfect

When Quality Matters!

Only local body shop in the area that is I-car gold!

TR-32016558

From step and swing to salsa and samba, Columbus will celebrate 10 years of friendly competition and community support on Jan. 26 and 27 during the 10th annual Dancing With the Stars, Columbus Style at The Commons. The event, which of course takes a cue from the long-running national television show, benefits Children Inc. and Family School Partners, and will feature 10 pairs of participants vying for dance dominance. Each contestant works with a local dance professional for months in advance to perfect a routine, and choreography and costumes typically echo the event’s theme, which for this year is — what else? — “Perfect 10.” For the first time, the event will consist of two evening shows on consecutive days, a decision prompted by the closing of the Clarion Hotel and Conference Center, which served as the venue for eight of the past nine years. Call (812) 376-4387 for ticket inquiries. For additional information and to cast an online vote, visit dwtscolumbus. com. — Jon Shoulders

www.voelzbodyshop.com 3471 Market Street, Columbus IN 47201

812-376-8868

January 2018 // She Magazine 9


» crafts

Memory Gifts

F

Two easy DIY projects can help your loved ones’ recollections By Melissa Rayworth, Associated Press

For elderly people struggling with memory loss, one of the toughest things can be forgetting the details of their own lives. What must it be like when you struggle to recall something you were sure you’d never forget — the name of an old friend, perhaps, or a favorite city where you once lived, or the meal you always cooked on special occasions? “This is people’s biggest fear, to lose their memory and to lose that sense of self,” says Gwynn Morris, associate professor of psychology at Meredith College. I reached out to Morris and to another expert on gerontology — Ann Norwich, director of the adult gerontology nurse practitioner program at York College of Pennsylvania — because my motherin-law is finding it harder to remember details about her own, quite remarkable life. At 93, she has retained her memories longer than many people do. But as recall has become more difficult, I’ve been hunting for ways to help her hold onto the stories and details she once knew about herself. I decided to design some customized memory aids for her, but I wanted to make sure they were effective. Morris and Norwich offered advice on how to jog an elderly person’s memories and help them retain the knowledge they still have. Here are two craft projects built from this research, both perfect gifts that are easy and inexpensive to make:

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Customized crossword puzzles

Crossword puzzles aren’t quite the cure-all for aging brains that they’re sometimes touted as, Morris says. But keeping the mind active can help slow some aspects of cognitive decline. And practicing recall of important information regularly can help you retain it. So if an elderly person once liked crosswords, as my mother-in-law did, it could be useful and fun to create custom puzzles using information they want to remember. Focus on valuable information, such as the names of grandchildren and some details about them, Norwich says. Elderly family members may be embarrassed to be struggling over remembering such information, so these puzzles can be a gentle way to jog those memories. “You want to play to things that are personally relevant to them,” Norwich says, and “make sure that these are positive experiences.” Take time to choose the right topics. My mother-in-law was an avid traveler, so I’ve designed puzzles about the foreign cities she most enjoyed living in and visiting. I’ve noticed that when I remind her of these experiences, she seems pleased and energized by the memories. Once you have your topics chosen, creating your puzzles is easy. There are many free puzzle-making sites online. Many are designed for teachers, but AP photos


they’re open to the public. One that’s easy to use is crosswordlabs.com . You’re given a blank space to enter your list of words and their clues. The site then builds a printable crossword puzzle with that information. To print your puzzles, choose some heavy paper from a craft store in appealing colors and textures, and use a home printer. Or to make the gift more substantial, give the collection of puzzles a title and design a cover page with the title and recipient’s name. Have the title page and puzzle pages printed on heavy paper and bound with a spiral binding at a copy shop.

Personalized playlists

Music can be especially valuable in triggering memories in older people, Norwich says, so she suggests making personalized playlists for elderly relatives. How does this work? As we age, “semantic memory,” which includes historical facts and other non-personal information, such as the lyrics to an old song, tends to be better preserved than personal memories. But that semantic memory is useful in triggering the “episodic memory” that includes our personal stories. Old music can trigger different personal, episodic memories in each

person who listens to it. To select songs with the most impact, consider the research into something called the “reminiscence bump.” Studies show that most people have particularly strong recall about events that happened in early adulthood, specifically throughout their 20s, says Morris. So pick a selection of songs that were popular when your loved one was between 20 and 30. These songs are most likely to spark the clearest personal memories. And for many people, these are especially energizing memories, because they were formed at a time when the person was young and active. You can save the playlist to an iPod, which you set up in a dock with a timer or alarm function. That way, the playlist can begin at a specific time each day, and the person won’t have to remember to turn it on. You can choose a “shuffle” function so the songs play in a different order each day. Another option: Burn the playlist to a CD, then place it in a CD player with an alarm clock function that will play the music at a particular time of day. Once it’s ready, spend some time listening to the playlist together and ask your relative what she remembers about listening to these songs in the past and about the years when the songs were popular. You, and she, may be surprised what good memories surface. January 2018 // She Magazine 11


Âť garden

Success with succulents Candelabra cactus makes itself at home By Lee Reich, Associated Press 12 She Magazine // january 2018

AP photo


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On my living room floor once sat a clerodendron plant, a gift that became an indoor oasis of lush greenery and clusters of red-tipped white flowers. Problem was, I had to tiptoe among its sprawling stems every time I wanted to approach the window. What’s sometimes needed in a houseplant is a bold plant, but with a small footprint. Such a plant has replaced my clerodendron. It’s variously called candelabra cactus, hat-rack cactus or dragon bones, all of which describe it adequately. The plant is not a cactus but a euphorbia, evidenced by the milky sap that oozes out of cut stems. It does look like a cactus, a saguaro cactus, not prickly but with similarly thick, upright stems that branch to make arms. The stems look like what dragon bones might look like: thick, three-sided, with paired spines running down the ridges and a milky green line dripping down each of the three flat faces. A few small, spoon-shaped leaves now cap the very ends of some branches. Flowers? No, dragon bones has never been known to flower. Too bad, because its flowers might be spectacular if they were anything like those of its cousins, poinsettia and crown-of-thorns. For some reason, you do not often see candelabra cactus for sale or even mentioned in gardening books. The plant is easy enough to propagate though. My first plant started out as an impenetrable hedge that I happened upon during a visit to the tropical island of St. Croix. As soon as I saw this hedge, I borrowed a knife and took cuttings: two pieces of stem, each a half-foot or so in length.

Like those of other succulents, candelabra cactus cuttings root best if initially allowed to dry out and callus over. Letting them sit out on a tabletop was the best I could do for them anyway for the few days until I returned home. Once home, I stuck the base of each of the stems into a mix of peat moss and perlite, watered them, and then watered again only when the mix was bone dry. Rooting and growth soon followed. Candelabra cactus can be pruned at any time, which is how I keep my plant at 2 or 3 feet high, rather than letting it become the 15-foot wall of greenery that it was in St. Croix. My plant summers in dappled shade on the deck, drinking mostly natural rainfall, although I give it occasional water and fertilizer when I think of it. As with other succulents, too much water is more harmful than too little. To lessen the chance of drowning the plant, grow it in an unglazed clay pot and add extra sand to the potting mix for drainage. A tall, fleshy plant growing in often dry soil is apt to tip over, so the sand also adds needed weight around the plant’s “ankles.” With water and occasional fertilizer, dragon bones grows fairly fast in summer, in addition to sporting a lush head of spoon-size leaves near the top of each stem. Come fall, candelabra cactus gets more brutal treatment, but never balks beyond dropping a few leaves. I move the plant to a well-lighted spot in the living room and then totally neglect it, watering it maybe once a month, maybe less. Well, not total neglect, because I do admire its svelte greenness each time I walk by. January 2018 // She Magazine 13


Âť home trends

All that Glitters Metallics warm your home all winter long By MELISSA RAYWORTH, Associated Press

14 She Magazine // january 2018

AP photos


some boxwood topiaries and pair with mercury glass, and you’ll have a wonderful winter look.” Crestin agrees. Last year, she mixed in mercury glass candleholders of different sizes with greenery along her mantel and loved the look enough to do it again this year. They gave off a warm glow even when the candles weren’t lighted, she says.

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With winter’s shortage of daylight, the sheen of metallic furnishings, fabric and decorative pieces can add a dose of the brightness and warmth so many of us are seeking. “We love metallics because of the glamour they lend to our lives by catching and refracting light,” says New York-based interior designer Young Huh. The trick, she says, is not going overboard with too much glittery goodness. “A little sparkle goes a long way,” Huh says. “If everything is high-octane shine, your home will look a little sad in daylight.” We asked Huh and two other interior design experts — Massachusetts-based Kristina Crestin, and Sarah Fishburne, director of trend and design for The Home Depot — for advice on using metallics in ways that will look great all winter.

Hard materials, soft look

Fishburne has been seeing a trend toward softer metal shades, which look sophisticated. “A little more white going into them is the best way to describe it,” she says. The golds are paler and less brassy, the silvers appear a bit whiter, and even shades of rose gold and coppers are a bit less orange. So even if you’re using several colors of metals, she says, “that palette becomes a bit softer.” Another way of getting metallic shine in a subtler way: Use mercury glass, which shows a range of soft colors in a metallic sheen when it catches the light. Huh says mercury glass is her favorite metallic “especially in vintage or retro feeling ornaments. It’s not too garish and looks well day or night. Buy

Casual copper

Last year, Crestin began adding more copper items to her decorating. She included planters covered with copper foil (similar to gold leaf), copper serving bowls for entertaining and LED lights on copper wire that she wove into greenery. She took the same approach for a client who wanted to freshen up her decorating. Crestin brought in a selection of copper ornaments for the client’s tree and mixed other copper items in throughout the room. “We used half of what she already had and then supplemented coppery tones,” she says. The technique works with any type of metal: “Maybe you edit what you have a little bit,” Crestin says, and then supplement with decorations in copper or another metal this year.

Easy additions

Sparkly metals also look great alongside organic and natural textures, Huh says. “For instance, what’s prettier than silver with burlap?” Buy a selection of simple terracotta planters or flower pots in different heights and spray paint some of them in metallic shades, says Fishburne. “There are so many fantastic metallic spray paints,” she says, in shades of rose gold, soft golds and silvers. Fill these planters with succulents. Huh agrees that flower pots are a great place to add metallic accents: “You can switch out some of your usual cachepots or accessories with items that have a bit of glimmer,” she says. Finally, Crestin points out that metallic scrapbooking paper from a craft store can be the perfect way to affordably add one more dose of metallic shimmer to your decorating. Buy several sheets in a color you like and use them as a dining table runner with votive candles and little silver-toned planters on top. For just a few dollars, she says, “it makes such an impact.” January 2018 // She Magazine 15


» trends

Ultra Violet Raise

A

Eight ways to celebrate Pantone’s color of the year By Jenny Elig, with reporting by Leanne Italie, Associated Press

At the end of 2017, the Pantone Color Institute named its color of the year. The winner for 2018? Pantone 183838, that is, ultra violet, a shade that will reign supreme for all of 2018. The color wasn’t chosen because it’s regal, though it resembles a majestic shade. It was chosen to evoke a counterculture flair, a grab for originality, ingenuity and visionary thinking, says Pantone Vice President Laurie Pressman. You’ll see Pantone 18-3838 in home design, industrial spaces and products, fashion, art and food, she says. The hue reflects the idea of living not inside the box or outside the box but with no box at all. Specifically, she calls the color “that complexity, that marriage, between the passionate red violets and the strong indigo purples.”

16 She Magazine // january 2018

More blue than red, ultra violet, Pressman says, “speaks to thoughtfulness, a mystical quality, a spiritual quality.” There’s still a passionate heat from enough red undertones, and a touch of periwinkle, but “it’s really the cool that prevails.” The purple choice speaks to rebellion, finding new ways to interpret our lives and surroundings, Pressman says. It also speaks to the pleasing calm of Provence and its purple flower fields. “I see this as very much an optimistic color, an empowering color,” she says. “We want to find some peace and calm within ourselves. How do we quiet our minds?” Although these options might not quiet your mind, here are eight ways (for 2018, get it?) to celebrate Pantone 18-3838.


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Listen to a Prince album. That’s right: The late Purple One embodies the calm rebelliousness of the color. Our recommendation? “Purple Rain,” naturally. Dare to try out NYX’s Liquid Suede lipstick in “Run from the World,” available at Target or Target.com for $6.99. This matte ultra violet shade is for the truly bold, but it’s flattering on all. If you want a metallic shade, try out NYX’s Cosmic Metals in “Ultraviolet,” $7.49. British cosmetic brand Butter London carries a Pantone-branded nail lacquer series, featuring six shades of blue-leaning purples ranging from super light lilac to richly saturated “Purple Rain.” You can snag your favorite (or all six) for $10 at Ulta. Drink it in with the Unicorn Kisses Cocktail, courtesy of Dee Samaan of SeductionintheKitchen.com. The sweet and tart drink is made of:

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Planning a wedding? Ultra violet is easily incorporated into bouquets, accessories, décor, bridesmaid dresses and cocktails. Add Dr. Oetker’s Ultra Violet Gel Food Colour to your Amazon shopping list. It sells for $8.54, and it’s a great way to get an ultra violet cake, macarons or frosting. Get a leg up on the trend with a pair of violet-colored opaque tights, $14.95, from We Love Colors via amazon.com. Even if you’re not ready to commit all the way to ultra violet, you can still incorporate it into your home. Dress up an old dresser or paint an accent wall in ultra violet or its sister shade, amethyst.

5 ounces strawberry lemonade 1 ounce UV Blue Raspberry Vodka ½ ounce Grenadine ¼ teaspoon Wilton Lilac Pearl Dust (a confectionary glitter powder) Edible silver star glitter garnish Ice To make, add the lemonade to a highball glass. Next, add the lilac pearl dust to the lemonade and give it a good stir. Add the UV vodka followed by the Grenadine. Place the ice in the glass and garnish with silver stars.

January 2018 // She Magazine 17


Stepping into

the Unknown Four women embrace new beginnings By Sara McAninch Photography by April Knox

18 She Magazine // january 2018


Major life changes can take many forms: starting college in another state or country, losing or quitting a job, beginning the journey to lose a significant amount of weight, or taking the necessary steps to gain sobriety, to name a few.

These things can be scary, overwhelming and exciting at the same time, but they also lead to new beginnings — chances to reinvent oneself. These Columbus women took the dive, taking bold steps to transform their lives.

January 2018 // She Magazine 19


The expat scholar Tsung-Min (Christina) Huang was born in Hsinchu, Taiwan, in a non-religious household. When she was 8, her parents met missionaries from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Huang, her mom and her older sister were baptized into the church about a year later. Like a lot of teenagers, Huang had the difficult decision of where to attend college. Most of the schools in her home country focused on English, math and the sciences, none of which appealed to her. “When I was taking the practice exam for the local college exams, I realized that the only subjects that I could have studied if I were to stay in Taiwan were English literature, which I know that’s not my strength,” Huang says. Because her family didn’t have much money and her options were limited, Huang did her research and found Brigham Young University in Provo, Utah. Although Huang would be heading to BYU sight unseen, she had lived abroad before, as a teenager, during a two-year stint in Japan with her family. And BYU was an affordable option that aligned with her religious beliefs. Better yet, it offered a degree in marketing management, a field of study that interested her. Huang was only 19 when she left her family and moved to the United States. At the time, her 20 She Magazine // january 2018

only other interactions with Western culture were during a trip to Australia as a child and some exchanges with Americans living in Japan. “Everything was so new, and I was nervous interacting with people,” she says. Huang’s English was good, but she discovered that it wasn’t good enough, so she had to learn more. She ate unfamiliar foods and overcame feeling like an outsider. Once she became acclimated, she found the environment to be more encouraging than the stricter school structure she was used to in Taiwan. “Growing up, if you got any score lower than an 80 the teachers would whip out this stick, and then they would hit you on your palms,” she says. At BYU, Huang learned to appreciate that her teachers valued the mentorship opportunities they provided to students. Huang carried these lessons with her after college when she moved to Columbus to work for Cummins Inc., where she interacts daily with peers from all over the world. For anyone feeling frustrated because of an international move, Huang has some advice. “Don’t give up,” she says. “A lot of things come with time. When you’re learning a different language, a lifestyle or culture, it’s just like learning something you’re familiar with – like a music instrument — it takes time and practice.”


The impact entrepreneur When you work at a corporate job that offers a salaried position right out of college, paid vacation time and medical, dental and vision insurance, it’s hard to imagine that you’d want to quit and go to work for yourself full time. But Alyssa Singh did just that in 2017. In February 2015 Singh was a senior in college, with two corporate internships under her belt; in fact, she was slated to work as a marketing communications specialist after graduation. Then an episode of “Shark Tank” featuring Sseko Designs founders Liz and Ben Bohannon caught her attention. “In that moment on ‘Shark Tank,’ Sseko Designs restored my faith that significant changes can be made in this complex world and I can be part of making them,” Singh says. “I kept that nugget of inspiration in my back pocket as I moved forward, and that spark eventually gave way to a flame.” Singh learned that Sseko (pronounced Say-ko) Designs provides jobs to young women living in Uganda; the company also helps the young women save for college.

The mission resonated with Singh. Eight months after starting her corporate day job, she became a representative of the company in her community. She began running her own business marketing and selling the fashion products made in Uganda here in the United States. She also began mentoring other people in the program; she currently has 50 people on her team. After six months as a Sseko representative, Singh’s best customer told her she should consider taking the gig full time. She hadn’t thought of that before. Two years into her marketing communications specialist role and a mere two days after returning from a Sseko trip to Uganda in June 2017, Singh gave notice at her corporate job. Her husband, who works as an engineer at the same company, fully supported her decision. Since quitting seven months ago, she hasn’t reconsidered her employment options. Although her first month of being a full-time Sseko Fellow ended up being her worst ever in terms of sales, Singh learned to not let the fear of failure hold her back. She advises anyone considering a big career change to dive in 100 percent and to find comfort in embracing the unknown. Now Singh says she’s happier in general. She is educating people on how to be more conscious consumers. She also finds joy in knowing she’s doing work that’s creating opportunity and community for women in Uganda. She has advice for others who might take the plunge. “This huge change that you are about to make, maybe you will love it and be hugely successful with it and stick with it until you retire,” she says. “Or maybe it will open the door to something else, something better.”

January 2018 // She Magazine 21


The Dedicated Trainer Maddison McElroy already had a daughter when she met her now-husband. In 2013, they started trying for a baby of their own. In October of that year, at eight weeks pregnant, she had a miscarriage. McElroy’s unhealthy habits came to a head. “I was overweight. I was unhappy,” she says. She realized she needed to lose weight to be healthy for her daughter and future children. But her dieting methods weren’t the best. McElroy would starve herself all day and eat only at dinner. As a result, she would overeat, going on benders and binges all night long starting at 5 or 6 p.m. She found one path and lost 25 pounds before becoming pregnant in spring 2014. She gained 50 pounds, bringing her back up to her original weight of 181 pounds, a fair amount on her 5-foot-1-inch-tall frame. Something had to give. She found her answer at Columbus’ Sky Sport Fitness, where, through indoor cycling and a restricted diet, she would lose 70 pounds during the next 18 months. She would ride with owner and creator Christine Nesci. “The first time I rode with Christine, she was telling me the things I needed to hear about myself. It’s not that she was even really talking to me, but at the same time she was talking directly to me whenever she would say the things she was saying during riding,” McElroy explains. “After that I was just hooked.” She felt so motivated by those messages that she began teaching indoor cycling at Sky in October 2016 and soon cycled and dieted her way to a 70-pound weight loss. Then it was time to build muscle. “In my initial weight loss I had lost 70 pounds; I got down to 114 pounds, and I still wasn’t happy there,” she says. “I wasn’t happy even though I lost all that weight, so I was like what do I want to do? What do I need to do to be happy? I was very chained to a very strict eating regimen. I had to eat very specifically to stay at that weight.”

22 She Magazine // january 2018

She began reverse dieting and put on 16 pounds of muscle. Today she weighs in at about 130 pounds, and it’s the happiest she’s ever been. She allows herself the occasional splurge, such as a piece of pizza with her husband or a burger. Working out and maintaining a healthy weight have calmed her down a little bit from her typical high-strung personality. It’s also made her a more rational, reasonable person, and she’s much calmer with her children. “Losing weight has really freed me from being self-conscious. I want to do things. I want to go do things with my family, with my husband. I want to go be busy. I want to be in social settings. I love people, but I was never confident enough to be around people very much, and so now I just am,” she explains. McElroy teaches five spinning classes per week at Sky Sport Fitness, and she works part time in Franklin. She also spends time teaching her 9-yearold daughter how to love herself. To the people considering a diet and weight loss journey, McElroy says, “Have the courage to just start. Don’t be afraid to change. At any point in your life you can say, ‘This isn’t my story. This isn’t how my life is going to go.’ Everyone starts somewhere.”


The Sober Yogi Amanda Hummer describes herself as a hummingbird, a term she picked up from Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love.” A hummingbird, Hummer says, is someone who “goes where the energy is flowing, goes where the nectar is, so she can cross-pollinate the world with ideas.” Being connected to the energy and being where it’s flowing impact all parts of her life, including her relationships, where she lives and what she reads, and it helps her stay focused. She didn’t always feel this way about herself, though. Hummer was born in Big Rapids, Michigan; after an eight-year period in Illinois, her family moved to Columbus when she was in eighth grade. She opted to study at Indiana University in Bloomington. There, Hummer was surrounded by her high school friends with whom she would go out drinking every weekend. In short order, her drinking escalated to the point that she dropped out of school and returned to Columbus. She continued some college at IUPUC, but she never finished her degree program and her drinking continued. It was the book “Carry On, Warrior: The Power of Embracing your Messy, Beautiful Life” by Glennon Doyle Melton that set Hummer on a path to sobriety.

The book is a collection of Melton’s essays about her struggles with bulimia and alcoholism. She had an ah-ha moment. “I saw that you could let your skeletons out of your closet and not only be OK, but be everything you want to be and more,” she explains. “Even though I hadn’t put down the drink yet, it was like I knew where I was going. I had to look at myself and go: It’s obvious it’s out of control.” Hummer set an initial goal of not drinking for a year. She soon attended her first Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. “I love raw, open, authentic truths coming out. I was dying for that,” she says. Now sober, Hummer still experiences challenges. In the last year-and-a-half she’s faced some major life transitions, such as a move to Missouri with her now ex-husband that caused her to dive into anxiety and depression. She spent six days in treatment for an eating disorder. A couple of months post-treatment she realized she wasn’t where she wanted to be, so she left her husband and moved with her two daughters into her mom’s house in Columbus. In May she lost her job through cutbacks. These challenges have taught Hummer to be more authentically herself and face her fears head on; she doesn’t let them get her down. “Things that people would consider failures, like divorce and job loss and moving back in with your mom and relapsing into an eating disorder and having depression and bulimia and all this other stuff, these things have been the problems that have birthed huge solutions of happiness and joy and freedom and enthusiasm and passion,” she says. She works as a yoga instructor at Uptown Yoga and Tipton Lakes Athletic Club, and she’s a substitute instructor for the Yoga and 12 Step Recovery program at Tara Treatment Center in Franklin. She moonlights as a bartender on the weekends. She’s training in Reiki, which she describes as “like massage only energy work.” She advises anyone wanting to get sober to trust the timing of her life. “Know that if you haven’t made your change yet, you’re getting ready to be ready. When you absolutely cannot hold yourself back, and the energy is so aligned, and you’re ready to just dive off the edge into the unknown, then that’s your time. In the meantime, practicing an immense amount of self-forgiveness and compassion is so important.”

January 2018 // She Magazine 23


»cuisine

The Lighter Side of the New Year

If you’re like us, your stomach is turning at the thought of all the rich, caloric food you took in over the holidays. What’s done cannot be undone, but we can do better in the future. Here, we have an appetizer, an entrée and a dessert, all on the lighter side, but no less comforting. 24 She Magazine // january 2018


RECIPE

Almond and Flax Crackers With Smoked Almond Spread Serves 12

Going crackers By the Culinary Institute of America, via Associated Press

For many of us, the new year is a time to make a fresh start. We’re wiping the slate clean with a renewed sense of optimism for the year ahead, and we’re trying to eat healthier foods, which means you won’t find a macaroni and cheese recipe at the end of this article. When it comes to reformulating our eating habits, it’s a little bit easier to plan breakfast, lunch and dinner. The real struggle, both in preparation and will power, comes when we start thinking about that mid-afternoon snack. No matter the time, the reason or the season, the best kind of snack to fill you up (and keep you that way) is one that is filled with protein. Nuts are especially handy as a snack food, because they are protein-rich, portable, and give us a daily dose of heart-healthy unsaturated fatty acids. The downside to nuts is that they can get, dare we say it, a little bit boring. We can toast them, give them a light sprinkle of salt, and, well, ‘about it before we start heading into border territories of healthy snacking. Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to pass off a toffee-coated cashew as a heart-healthy snack. If you’re fed up with your 3 p.m. handful of almonds and find yourself eyeballing the office’s snack machine, this Almond and Flax Crackers with Smoked Almond Spread recipe from The Culinary Institute of America is very much what you need. We made it a little fancy (more on that later), but at its core, this is “cheese” and crackers. The crackers only have five ingredients, and they are vegan and gluten-free. They’re spread on a baking sheet and dehydrated in your oven (so, low and slow baking), which means no fussy rolling and cutting. You’ll love the bold flavor from a heavy dose of coriander seed, but you can mix and match any of your favorite seasonings, like fennel seed, curry blends, or even Korean-style chili paste.

1 cup almonds 1 cup smoked almonds ½ cup golden flax seeds 2 tablespoons coriander seeds 2 tablespoons tamari or soy sauce 1 tablespoon agave nectar 1¼ cups water, or as needed, divided use Kosher salt, as needed Micro herbs and edible flowers, as needed for garnish In two covered containers, cover the almonds with water and soak overnight. Drain and reserve separately. Preheat the oven to 170 F (see note). In a blender or food processor, combine about half of the flax seeds and the coriander, and pulse to grind finely. Add the drained plain almonds, remaining flax seeds, tamari, agave nectar, and 1 cup of the water, and blend until a smooth paste forms. Line a baking sheet with a silicone baking mat. Spread the almond mixture into an even layer, all the way to the edge of the pan. Use the back of a knife to score the paste into your desired shape. Place in the oven to dehydrate until dry and crisp, about 7 hours. (Time will depend on the size of your pan. An 18-by-13-inch pan will take about 7 hours.) Meanwhile, in a clean blender combine the smoked almonds with the remaining 1/4 cup water, and blend until smooth. Season with salt, to taste. Spread or pipe the almond spread on each cracker and top with micro herbs and edible flowers before serving. Chef’s note: If your oven won’t go to 170 F, set it to the lowest possible temperature and check the crackers frequently, since they will cook faster. January 2018 // She Magazine 25


»cuisine

Smoky lentil soup brings depth and flavor

RECIPE

Smoky Vegan Lentil Soup Serves 8

By Melissa D’Arabian, Associated Press

1 tablespoon olive oil

Rich bean soups are classic winter comfort food. They are filling, healthy and inexpensive, making them a worthy addition to the menu rotation. The downside to dried bean cookery is the time it takes to soak and then cook beans. Canned beans are a reasonable substitute, although they cost more than three times the price of their dried, bagged counterparts. An easy, money-saving solution is lentils, which you can find easily at any grocery store, next to the dried beans. Brown lentils — the type you’ll most likely find in inexpensive bags next to the rice — don’t require any soaking (although a good rinse is recommended), and are cooked to tender perfection in about a half hour. Green lentils are a little thicker and firmer than brown lentils (and often a little pricier), so they take a few minutes more to cook. Red lentils are softer, holding their shape less, so are best used for sauces or stews where you are seeking a thicker, creamier texture — for instance, when you are making an Indian dal. Don’t let the cheap price fool you. The everyday brown lentil is a nutrition powerhouse. One serving has over 8 grams of filling fiber, 9 grams of protein and a nice array of vitamins and minerals, including over half the daily requirement of folate and nearly 20 percent of our daily iron. Lentils themselves have an earthy, mild flavor, so they easily take on the flavors of other ingredients. This recipe for Smoky Lentil Soup is all plant-based, which means it’s truly jam-packed with health-boosting foods, but it’s also full of flavor. It gets its smokiness from smoked paprika instead of the traditional ham bone, and little bit of cumin. 26 She Magazine // january 2018

1 large onion, chopped (about 2 cups chopped) 1 stalk celery, chopped (about ½ cup chopped) 4 ounces white mushrooms, finely chopped (about 1 cup chopped) 1¼ cups cubed butternut squash (½ -inch cube) (or substitute chopped carrot) 5 cloves garlic, minced 1 teaspoon ground cumin 2 teaspoons smoked paprika 1 teaspoon chili powder 2 teaspoons dried Italian herb seasoning (or dried oregano) 3 cups vegetable stock 2-3 cups water ½ pound dried brown lentils, rinsed and picked through (about 1¼ cups) 1 bay leaf 2 teaspoons apple cider vinegar (or wine vinegar) ½ teaspoon kosher salt, if needed In a large heavy-bottomed soup pot or Dutch oven, soften the onion, celery and mushrooms in the olive oil over medium heat, and cook for 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Add the squash, garlic, cumin, smoked paprika, chili powder and Italian herbs and cook for another five minutes, stirring frequently. Onion should be quite soft now. Add the stock, 2 cups of the water, the lentils and bay leaf and bring to a simmer over medium high heat. Reduce heat, cover partially with a lid and let simmer until lentils and squash are tender, about 25 to 30 minutes. If the mixture gets too thick, add up to another cup of water. Once soup is cooked, remove 1 to 2 cups of the soup to a blender and very carefully blend on low until somewhat smooth. Pour the thickened, blended soup back into the pot and stir. Stir in vinegar and taste for salt. Add the salt only if needed. Chef’s note: Green lentils may also be used, but add about 10 minutes of cooking time.


Getting tarted up By Melissa D’Arabian, Associated Press

We could all use a fantastic tart recipe in our hip pockets. If the thought of making homemade crust intimidates you, or if you just prefer not to take in so many fat calories densely packed into a sheet of pastry, stick with me. The tart I’m talking about today uses a simple olive-oil cake as the base, which is then topped with fresh berries. I took inspiration from a fruit-topped sponge cake and turned the idea into a recipe that could be made start-to-finish in about an hour, and much of that time is baking or cooling. I whipped up a speedy orange-olive oil cake (and it’s technically speaking a quick bread, but our secret) and made that the base, which works well with either regular flour or most gluten-free flours I have tried. I used a pie pan with a raised center, a worthy minimal investment if you do any amount of baking. Buy one and you’ll find a thousand uses for it.

RECIPE

Orange and Raspberry Tart

Preheat the oven to 350 F.

Serves 8

In a medium bowl, sift the flour, baking powder and soda, salt and cinnamon. Whisk dry ingredients together and set aside. In another medium bowl, whisk together the egg and sugar vigorously until mixture is pale yellow, about 1 minute. Whisk in the oil, extract, zest and juice mixture and mix until well-blended. Scrape the wet ingredients into the dry ingredients with a rubber spatula and stir gently until combined, but do not overmix.

Base:

Topping:

1 cup all-purpose flour

About 2 cups fresh raspberries, or other berries or sliced fruit

¾ teaspoon baking powder ¼ teaspoon baking soda ¼ teaspoon salt

2 tablespoons orange marmalade

Pinch cinnamon

2 tablespoons boiling water

1 egg

Powdered sugar for dusting, optional

1/3 cup granulated sugar 1/3 cup olive oil ½ teaspoon vanilla extract Zest of one orange, about 2 teaspoons Juice of one orange, plus enough water to make 1/3 cup

Line the bottom of an 8-inch pie pan with raised center with parchment paper (cut round to fit) and spray liberally with nonstick spray. (If raised center pie pan is unavailable, use a regular 8-inch tart or pie pan.) Pour the batter into the prepared pan and bake until the center springs back when gently pressed, about 25 to 30 minutes. Let the cake cool for 15 minutes before gently unmolding and chilling in the freezer for 15 minutes to cool completely. (Or allow cake to cool at room temperature for another 30 minutes.) Meanwhile, place the orange marmalade and boiling water into a medium bowl and whisk until jam is loosened. Add the berries and stir to coat. Add an extra tablespoon of water if mixture is dry. Flip the cake over so the concave side is up. Use a toothpick, skewer or fork to poke holes into the bottom of the cake. Spoon the raspberry mixture onto the cake and arrange the berries so they are pretty. Just before serving, garnish with a dusting of powdered sugar, if desired. January 2018 // She Magazine 27


Designs

The Way the Cookie Crumbles By Jenny Elig

This year, rather than making snide and/or bitter comments about Valentine’s Day, I’m going to welcome it with open arms. Why not? There’s plenty to love about the holiday, from its color scheme (who doesn’t like red?) to its associated candies (those chalky conversation hearts are one of my biggest weaknesses). The first — perhaps only — part of accepting Valentine’s Day into your heart is, duh, handing out valentines to your co-workers or classmates. But handing out any of the ready-made valentines on the market would make me look like a creep; in my experience, most valentines are either boy band- or cartoon-themed. The boy band of my generation is New Kids on the Block, and I don’t even know what cartoons the kids are into. So, it’s settled: I’ll make my own. Because valentines are a chance to share things you adore with people you love (or at the very least are stuck with for eight hours a day in a classroom), I thought about one of my deepest loves: baked goods. And I went from there.

28 She Magazine // january 2018

What you need: Foam sheets Printer paper Hot glue sticks Pen

To make: Cut white printer paper into small strips and write various messages on them. Set these aside. Using a bowl, trace a circle onto foam sheets, then cut circle out. Once glue gun is heated, fold circle in half, like a taco. Unfold slightly to apply hot glue around the top arc, leaving an opening on either side. Allow glue to cool and dry, and neaten up any threads. Fold the open ends in toward each other, then apply glue where they meet to bond them. Hold the ends together as they dry. Once the glue is completely set, insert the paper strips into each cookie by lining the strip with a small bit of glue and then fixing it to the inside of the cookie.


the view from abroad «

Out of the Safe Bubble By Grace Kestler

In the fall of 2015, I decided to leave my corporate job in Columbus and embark on a journey across the world. I moved to Berlin to join an 18-month master’s program called Intercultural Conflict Management at Alice Salomon University. The program was taught in English and included students from all over the world who brought with them their perspectives and cultural experiences. Of course, I didn’t go to Germany just to study; I wanted to find new ways to push myself and experience the world beyond the emotionally safe Columbus. You see, I grew up in Columbus. Both of my parents were born and raised in the area, too. I spent summers on my grandparents’ farm, chasing my sheep that I showed at the Bartholomew County 4-H Fair. I really love corn. The old Commons playground was my haven. In 1997, I saw “Titanic” at the Crump Theatre. I even became a third-generation Cummins employee after college. So, yes, the Columbus bubble kept me close and safe. It was embarrassing how many people I knew or people who knew me and I forgot their names because they really knew my parents (I apologize to those individuals for my looks of Grace Kestler is a confusion). Columbus native who I was a fortunate kid. My parents made it a point to travel went to Germany for graduate school and and experience new things. I know this is where I got my itch hasn’t come back ... yet. for travel and the idea that maybe I needed a bigger adventure than Columbus. My first trip abroad was in college. In true American spirit, our group went to six cities across Spain and Portugal over 12 days. Despite the distracting “gotta see it all” mentality (that I no longer adhere to), I fell in love with the cultures and the feeling of breaking the walls of my little comfort zone box. I had the pleasure of learning how “fun” cobblestones are as a wheelchair user and that accessible restrooms are like finding gold. It’s almost like the challenge of all the obstacles made me want it even more. When the idea to study abroad for a master’s degree popped into my head, I didn’t think twice. I’ll be honest; I was a bit naive about how difficult it can be to start completely over in a new city, 5,000 miles away from Columbus. Now, two-and-a-half years away from Columbus, I realize the value of growing up in a unique town with family and friends nearby. I’m also extremely thankful that I’ve had experiences I may not have had in Columbus. I currently live near Frankfurt, Germany, and am teaching intercultural communication and migration studies, in English, at Hochschule Darmstadt. Many ask why I’m still here. I’m not sure how much longer I’ll stay, but for now I enjoy the little (big) things like comprehensive health care, cute town centers and inclusive public transit. These are my messages home.

January 2018 // She Magazine 29


» transplanted spouse

Stringing Me Along

By Katie Willett

Learning to play guitar was something I had always wanted to do but felt that I lacked the discipline and/or talent to do. Before I moved to Columbus, I kept myself immersed in the music scene of Chicago. From small jazz spots to my friends attempting to make it big by working their way through the bar band gigs, every weekend I breathed in the music. Sure, I could have kept that up when I moved to Columbus. There are tons of opportunities to be part of the vibrant music lifestyle in this area but I was too consumed with moving, trying to find employment, and making friends to worry about my old hobby. Gradually, I let go of 30 She Magazine // january 2018

my live band addiction and seeped if you decide after two weeks that deeper into finding new musical you want to keep going, then you nuggets online and discovering that keep going. I still really wanted to learn to play That’s attainable, I thought an instrument. After all, what else as I picked up Jasmine. The first did I have to do? I was still a part five minutes went by fast, and I time personal trainer with no kids thought, I can do this. The next day, and it was a really cold winter. I accidentally did 10 minutes. By Christmas was coming and guess the end of the week I was doing 30 what Santa put under my tree? He minute practices without Jasmine delivered a sound-worthy, if cheap, and I getting mad at each other. By blonde lady named Jasmine. She the end of two weeks it felt like my was clear if not deep and resonatfingertips were finally losing that ing, and she’s a beaut of a little swollen, about to fall off feeling and guitar. I locked myself in our office, calluses were almost developing. I held Jasmine, and thought, now could play three chords, I was pracwhat? After pacing around Jasmine ticing on those three chords. I was a few minutes, I decided to turn learning how to play my first song, to the internet for help. I quickly “I Walk the Line by Johnny Cash.” I found a website that felt…cool. offered free video classSince those first es. I started with class tentative and bashful number one: Tuning months, I now sing your guitar. After I was along with my new all tuned up I clicked on man Oscar, a stonethe next class and startcold fox with a marbled ed with the basics of finish and a gorgeous Katie Willett has lived in hand placement. It was resonating sound. I Columbus since 2012. hard, it hurt my fingers can competently, if not She loves trail running with her dog, playing and I wanted to give up perfectly, play and sing, guitar and eating at after five minutes. and its served as a form Lincoln Square Pancake I put Jasmine down of therapy in my life. House with her family. and left her where she If I’ve had a bad day, I lay for about a week. I was poutplay; if it’s cold outside, I play, if I’m ing. She hurt my fingers and my struggling with my anxiety disorfeelings. I, again, turned to the der, I play. Taking the time to learn internet for inspiration. I found a guitar has made my life so much blog about a guy who had started richer in such a surprising way. teaching himself to play a year My son Max loves it and Chris will earlier and he said he encountered usually stop whatever he’s doing to the same pouty-give-it-up-becausecome sit near me and listen. Chris its-hard feelings. He got over it by shared with me last year that he’s deciding not to worry about it so always wanted to play piano. He’s much. Maybe trying to practice an getting a keyboard to learn on from hour a day is too much? Maybe just me in a few weeks for his birthday. make the goal 5 minutes a day and Her name is Stella.


first comes love «

A

a letter to my baby By Catherine Winkler

As my first child’s due date is quickly approaching, I find myself torn between picturing what my baby might look like and walking around in a daze, still in disbelief that I’m even pregnant. All the clichés are true: Pregnancy is an everyday miracle that I don’t think I’ll ever get over. Watching my belly move and feeling my baby’s hiccups never stop mesmerizing me and more than make up for any other less-than-fun pregnancy symptoms. I’ve thought about how that moment when I first look into my baby’s eyes will feel and wanted to write a letter to my baby in this column before I become a parent. Dear Baby, As I write this letter to you, we have about 35 days to go until your due date. I know babies don’t particularly care about things like timelines and due dates, so come whenever you want. If you’re anything like me, you’ll be running late, even though you had the best intentions to arrive early. I can’t wait to meet you. You’ll have to excuse the inevitable tears from me (and probably your dad, too), but we’ve waited so long for your arrival – almost 33 years for me. I’m sure bringing you home from the hospital will be one of the scariest car rides of my life. We’ve taken the classes and read the books, and I still have no idea what it’s going Catherine Winkler is to be like interpreting your cries and making sure you’re a Columbus resident and author. You can fed and happy around the clock. Everyone tells me we’ll find out more online at figure it out. I like to have backup plans for my backup catedashwood.com. plans, so if you could help me out even just a little bit, that would be wonderful. What color are your eyes going to be? Will you have hair? Who will you look like, me or Jordan? And the biggest question everyone wants to know: Are you a boy or girl? The suspense has been so much fun. I wonder if my intuition has been right (though I kind of doubt it). Either way, your closet is full of adorably cute clothes for the many outfit changes I will put you through. I’m trying to enjoy this last month before you arrive as much as possible. The best things in life are worth the wait, and you, my beautiful baby, are the best thing I have ever done. With love, Your mother

January 2018 // She Magazine 31


» the farmer’s daughter

The Etiquette Balance

I

By Katie Glick

It’s a New Year and it’s time for new resolutions. I usually take the time for some personal reflection, organization and prioritization. This means new folders, lists, purging of old files and making new ones. It’s also a time to take a moment to review our strengths and weaknesses and reflect on how we can enhance our personal development for ourselves and others. My daughter is now 1½ years old, and she is developing mentally, physically and socially more each day. I will say that we have taught and will continue to teach her manners and socially acceptable behaviors as she grows and develops, but there is one thing that we have been failing with lately: sitting at the dinner table. I will admit that I love a good meal and conversation around the table with friends and family while the wine flows. And, frankly, one of my favorite chores as a child was setting the table. So our family New Year’s resolution is to start eating at the dinner table each night. It will be hard in the hustle and bustle of our lives, and the set-up and clean-up will prevent me from multitasking during dinnertime. However, the long-term results for our daughter and ourselves will outweigh the possible struggles we will encounter along the way and the short amount of time it will take from our evening. Katie Glick lives with her A teacher friend of mine husband and daughter recently texted a group of us on their family farm and said, “If you want to know near Columbus. She shares her personal, if your child is a decent human work, travel and farm being, ask their teacher how life stories on her blog, they behave on a food day.” I “Fancy in the Country.” remember the kids who couldn’t sit still or clean up after themselves at lunch, let alone a special food day in the classroom. Sitting at the table doesn’t just teach our children how to behave properly during a meal; it also helps them develop conversational skills.

32 She Magazine // january 2018

Mae Glick sits at the table in Lake Como, Italy

Even though you may not realize it now, having them set the table can help set them up for life. It’s a time for the adults at the table to listen — really listen — to our children instead of reading emails or worrying about tomorrow. When we listen to each other, we learn about each other, and I believe sometimes that is what we need a little more of in this world. If you want your children to be successful in their lives and careers, be a role model and show them some proper etiquette and manners. Eat at the table and not in the car or around the TV, make them write thank-you notes, shake people’s hands and be kind and courteous – no matter the person or situation. It will set them apart and above the expectation of today’s world and be something that will connect them across generations. I could eat a five-course meal dressed up with five forks every night of the week, but in today’s world and with my schedule, I know I can’t. I’ll settle for two or three forks instead. It’s all a balance, and I know you’re busy, so no judgment here. This is simply a conversation, one you should be having around the dinner table.


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