Planning Your Final Wishes By Eva Barrows After a friend’s mother passed away, she asked me if I had a will in place. She then explained that she wasn’t asking me about the distribution of my assets but about my final wishes. She appreciated that her mother left her a clear plan, detailing her funeral wishes and even her own obituary. Her instructions gave my friend time to grieve without worrying about what her mother would have wanted. I thought this was excellent advice. My parents are seniors, and knowing how they want to be remembered would provide peace of mind for them and me. I did some internet research on how to write your own obituary and record your final wishes. There are many resources on these topics. Legacy.com’s “Fu-
neral Planning Guide” does a comprehensive job outling the end-of-life choices, such as locating important documents and preplanning funeral decisions. The hardest part was telling my parents, but my mom agreed it was a good idea. I created packets for each of us containing printouts of the guide and information on writing an obituary. This end-of-life planning prompted my mom to find her life insurance statement, her safe deposit box key, and copies of my parents’ will. Looking at the will, she discovered their assets had changed and their family had grown. Updating the will became a priority. As we went through the funeral planning checklist, we discovered we all wanted to be cremated, but the way we wanted our
ashes handled varied. We entered our individual wishes on our planning guides. We didn’t plan every detail at once, but we did start an important conversation. The planning guide gave us a framework to plan ahead. End-of-life planning can be an awkward subject to bring up with loved ones, but there is a sense of relief about preparing in advance. Making your wishes known, gives you some level of control over what happens when you are gone and alleviates the burden on those grieving your loss. It’s never too early to start planning. Eva Barrows is a San Francisco Peninsula-based freelance writer and editor.
Final Wishes Index … body & organ donation Brain Support Network, Inc. 650-814-0848 P.O. Box 7264 Menlo Park, CA 94026 California Transplant Donor Network 1611 Telegraph Ave., Ste. 600 Oakland, CA UC San Francisco Willed Body Program San Francisco, CA
burial, cremation & funeral services Crippen and Flynn Woodside Chapel crippenandflynnchapels.com Belmont: 650-595-4103 Redwood City: 650-369-4103 Neptune Society of Northern California neptune-society.com 14
650-592-9880 1645 El Camino Real Belmont, CA 94002 Skylawn Memorial Park skylawnmemorialpark.com 650-227-3142 Hwy. 92 at CA-35 San Mateo, CA 94402 Sneider & Sullivan & O’Connell’s Funeral Home and Cremation Service ssofunerals.com 650-343-1804 977 S El Camino Real San Mateo, CA 94402
grief support groups Visit sutterhealth.org Kara Grief kara-grief.org 650-321-5272 457 Kingsley Ave. Palo Alto, CA 94301
hospice/Palliative Care Mission Hospice & Home Care missionhospice.org 650-554-1000 66 Bovet Rd., Ste. 100 San Mateo, CA 94402 Sutter Care at Home San Mateo Hospice sutterhealth.org 650-685-2830 1700 S Amphlett Blvd., #110 San Mateo, CA 94402 Vitas Healthcare vitas.com 650-350-1835 3190 Clearview Way, #100 San Mateo, CA 94402
trust/probate administration (See Attorneys in the Planning Index)
Born
to
Age Peninsula — Spring 2022
