Infusion # 265: Feb 21-March 6 2016

MUSIC • PEOPLE • LIFE

TECHNO MEETS HOUSE

IS BACK WITH PAN-POT, PAUL RITCH, STEVE BUG AND MORE! Eddie Halliwell, Example, Sandy Rivera, James Zabiela, Analog Room, Claptone, Avicii, B.O.B, DXBeach and lots more! infusionmag

infusionmagazine

infusionmagazine

GOTG C

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GUEST LIST TALAL BUDEBS Publisher

CHARL CHAKA

Managing Partner charlchaka@infusion.ae

ANDY BUCHAN

Editor andy@infusion.ae

VIP PATEL

Magazine / Sales Director vip@infusion.ae +971 050 169 8712

CHRIS RAYNER

Online chris@infusion.ae

PAULA MANGUEIRA Design design@infusion.ae

CONTRIBUTORS:

Vip Patel, Sarah Abel Verghese, Chris Rayner, Stephen Day, Charl Chaka, Rich Showell, Sam Moult

INFUSION IS PUBLISHED BY

Milehigh Media, LLC PO Box 53443 – Dubai, UAE Tel/Fax: 04 368 8098

OUR PARTNERS

We’re loving the sound of Vox’s new open air cinema at the Galleria Mall on Al Wasl Road.

New HBO series Vinyl - produced

by Jagger and Scorcese - lived up to expectations with its 2 hour series opener, get locked in!

Cavalli have opened a brand new ice bar open until Ramadan, where you can drink Jager, dance to the bar’s exclusive DJ and pretend you’re in Iceland.

Big ups to DJ EZ who’s playing a marathon 24 hour set that will be streamed live on March 27 via djez.com – now that’s a lot of garage tunes!

Kanye West. So, so, so many reasons.

AED250 to see Nouvelle Vague, a (very good) cover band? Sorry, that’s just silly money to see one live band.

Donald Trump. Can Americans really be that stupid that he gets elected?

BLACK LIST

SAY WHAT? RUMOURS Ex Deep Dish star Dubfire has been confirmed for a return to the city with a date at Eden lined up this March.

OLD JOKES HOME: Q: How do you console someone with bad grammar skills?

A: There, their, they’re.

MEME CORNER:

SEPARATED AT BIRTH?

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WE LOVE Shibuya

There are now more house nights than people in Dubai, but several stand out above the cluttered competition – Shibuya being one of them.

Forged in The Basement, and now a nomadic brand that calls Square and 360 home, Shibuya don’t pander to fashion, they don’t go with the trends. They’re house music, through and through. There’s no minimal nonsense, no looped techno beats that drone and drone, no Bottles and Models pretension – just 4 to the floor good times, with jackin’ beats, beefy basslines and a clued up crowd. You only need to look at their big bookings to date to see they mean business as DJ T, Yousef, Jimpster, Clive Henry and Bushwacka have graced their decks.

Driven by Marko Smokingroove, they’ve built up a dedicated following of house heads who’ll no doubt be congregating at 360 on February 26 as they team up with audio tonic for the debut of Swiss DJ Mendo.

LOOKING

BACK

Retrospective on what’s been happening in our world.

• WHAT WE DID • PHOTO GALLERY

Looking Back

What we did REDFEST @ DUBAI MEDIA CITY

Braving the chills, both nights saw 15,000 teens and tweens (with some restless chaperons) run wild in a carnival atmosphere, complete with a dozen eateries, fun promo stands (hey Reebok!), and a hefty line-up. And ‘Hotline Bling’ sung by 4 different artists!

Day 1 opened with short yet captivating sets from the lovely Nathalie Saba, an intense Grace Sewell, local favourites Kris Fade with Two Tone and the silky-smooth Dawin. Soon after, the delightful Vamps were on with some of the best crowd-interaction we’ve seen (Cue: Screams!). We then had the scintillating Rita Ora, while EDM DJ Steve Aoki closed the wild night with a bang – literally – with drops that were accompanied by streamers exploding from the stage.

Redfoo kicked off Day 2 with a sexy (and we know it!) set, followed by girlie-girls Fifth Harmony and Dubai’s very own Esther Eden whose dreamy vocal make her one to look out for. Next was powerhouse Eva Simons, with her high-energy dance routines, bouncing between the DJ booth and the stage. Trey Songz mellowed the crowd, mercifully, allowing us to catch a breath before Adam Lambert’s dark and moody tone and Mistajam’s DJ set full of commercial club anthems closed out the festival.

Sarah Abel Verghese

Looking Back

LOCK STOCK AND BARREL OPENING NIGHT @ GRAND MILLENIUM You know you’re in a cool joint when you come face to face with Jimi Hendrix as you enter, while a lifesize painting of Johnny Cash is giving you the finger in the toilets. The latest addition to Tecom’s bar and pub scene, Lock Stock and Barrel comes from the team behind Q43 and it has the same attention to detail as the Media One venue – from a pinball machine in the ladies’ toilets to a literal wall of sound thanks to a huge array of (unplugged) speakers stacked up two walls, the 8th floor Grand Millenium venue is as cool as they come. Musically, the opening night was a mix of a resident band pumping out indie and rock classics, and a DJ mixing properly old school classic hip hop, while the free bar from 7-10pm made sure the night got started early. With pool tables, giant screens for live sport and dedicated men and ladies nights, this could quickly become the hottest bar and pub in town.

YOUR MUSICAL JOURNEY MAKERS

WHEN: Thursday 3rd March 2016, 9pm to 3am WHERE: XL Dubai, Habtoor Grand ENTRANCE: AED150 INFO + TABLES: +971 52 634 1040 or info@xldubai.com DRESS CODE: Naughty!!

BACK2BASICS FEAT. SATOSHI TOMIIE

DYSFUNKTION @ SQUARE

HOUSE OF AFRIKA FEAT. SOPH-EYE RICHARD @ DEK ON 8

NORA EN PURE @ XL

PLUS MINUS FEAT. LOS SURUBA @ LEVEL 41

RETRO FEAT. PAUL TAYLOR @ CHAMELEON

LOOKING

FORWARD

Where we filter out the best things that are coming your way...

• LOCAL NEWS •PAN-POT • FAST EDDIE •B.O.B • THE ENGINE ROOM •MY MUSIC-SANDY RIVERA •MAKING A EXAMPLE

Looking Forward

Local News PEPPERMINT RETURN WITH AVICII

After their sold out show with David Guetta for NYE, Peppermint are back on April 1 with Avicii. The Swedish star has been battling illness for a while, and had to postpone his last scheduled DXB show, but is confirmed to play the World Trade Centre in a month’s time.

A Grammy winning DJ and producer, he’s behind huge club smashes like ‘Levels’ and ‘Hey Brother,’ and has clocked over 600 million Youtube views and several billion streams during his short career.

Early bird tickets are AED295 from peppermint-experience.com.

SCHULZ BACK AT NASIMI

Following his stand out gig at Nasimi last season when he was greeted by thousands of fans, it’s no surprise to see that Robin Schulz has been invited back to play on Thursday February 25.

The German DJ has been a huge hit on the house and EDM scene in the last 18 months, with his remix of ‘Prayer In C’ becoming the most Shazam’d track in history. Early bird tickets are AED150, with ladies free before 9pm.

Looking Forward

ET W!LD PIKNIC ATSIGN EDEN UP CLAPTONE

Piknic Electronik have started their new season with a bang, and have their biggest booking yet as the day time, family-friendly house party at The Montgomerie have confirmed German DJ and producer Claptone as their Saturday March 5 headliner. His remix of Gregory Porter’s ‘Liquid Spirit’ was one of club land’s biggest hits last year, while he’s also remixed for Disclosure, The Pet Shop Boys and Faithless. Tickets are AED130 in advance from Platinumlist.net and doors open at 1pm.

PLUS MINUS GO LIVE

Live favourite Mathew Jonson is back in Dubai for another session of cutting edge house and techno grooves for Plus Minus. Utilising a hardware set up that would make NASA look twice, he blends organic house vibes with pulsing techno to create a fully unique sound that’s indebted to his classical piano roots. The main man behind cult label Wagon Repair, he’s an in-demand performer, playing Japan, London, Italy and Switzerland in the coming weeks before his March 4 date at Level 41.

Looking Forward

ET W!LD HEIDI AT HI!EDEN

BBC Radio 1 DJ Heidi is back with her trademark house sound at Eden on Friday February 26. The German DJ holds residencies in Berlin, London and Ibiza thanks to her Jackathon parties, and has booked DJs like Richie Hawtin, Solomun, Derrick Carter and Maceo Plex. Her Thursday night residency on BBC Radio 1 has seen her become one of the most trusted house music selectors.

ILLA J LEADS J DILLA TRIBUTE

A seminal figure in the hip hop scene, Deep Crates are celebrating the life and music of J Dilla on Thursday February 25 at Velocity.

The renowned beat maker and producer is one of the most revered figures in hip hop and sadly passed away in 2006. His younger brother Illa J – a successful artist in his own right – leads the musical tribute with support from Lobito Brigante, Frezidante and Dubijad.

Tickets are AED100 and doors open at 9pm.

Looking Forward

ET W!LD JILLIONAIRE AT EDEN PON DE FLOOR

Major Lazer’s Jillionaire will be at Cirque Le Soir on February 23 for a DJ set. A huge band following the stand out success of their track ‘Lean On’, the band were originally set up by Diplo and Switch, before Jillionaire and Walshy Fire joined as part of the production and live set up. Expect plenty of Major Lazer classics like ‘Pon De Floor,’ ‘Bubble Butt’ and ‘Get Free’ as well as lots of party starting tunes at the free entry event.

SOMETHING BIG BOAT PARTY

Drum and Bass night Something Big are back in 2016 with another of their day time yacht parties, with Sam Binga and Ant TC1 headlining on Friday February 26. The 100 capacity, 4 hour party leaves from Pier 7 at Dubai Marina at 3pm, with 50 Weapons star Sam Binga dropping a hip hop, footwork with Drum and Bass from the Metalheadz star Ant TC1. For tickets, email somethingbigdubai@ gmail.com or call 056 649 9728.

Looking Closer

JAMESAT ZABIELA ET W!LD EDEN LAUNCHES BACK2BASICS AT PACHA

DJ Jedi James Zabiela is the first booking for Back2Basics at their new weekly home Pacha Ibiza Dubai. The supremely skilled DJ will be showing off his skills in Pacha’s main room on Thursday February 25, with Wehba and John Digweed confirmed for March 11, Marco V on March 17 and Hernan Cattaneo on April 14.

PARTY IN THE POOL WITH TIËSTO

DXBeach is back in 2016 with a bang as they not only have Dutch superstar DJ Tiësto headlining on February 26 at Zero Gravity, they’re also unveiling their brand new 2000 square meter pool expansion. Joining the house and trance DJ at DXBeach are rising Swedish house DJ Mikael Weermets, the Mambo brothers as well as urban duo BFG and Fever. Tickets are AED275 or AED400 for poolside access from Platinumlist.net.

Looking Closer

XL SIGN MY DIGITAL ENEMY ET W!LD ATUP EDEN

It’s been a busy 2016 for XL to date, and they’ve got more big names on the horizon as they’ve signed up Esquire and My Digital Enemy. Esquire is one of the fastest rising names on the house music scene, having remixed for A-Trak and Coldplay, and plays on Friday February 26 while My Digital Enemy return to Dubai on March 11 for another night of high energy house and electro.

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Cover Feature

COOKING UP A TECHNO TREAT WITH PAN-POT

THE HARD-HITTING GERMAN DUO ARE BACK AT GROOVE ON THE GRASS ON FRIDAY MARCH 11 FOLLOWING THEIR STAND OUT SHOW FOR THEM 2 YEARS AGO. AHEAD OF THEIR RETURN ALONGSIDE PAUL RITCH, STEVE BUG AND MORE, WE DUG DEEP INTO THEIR INTERVIEW HISTORY TO BRING YOU SOME OF THEIR BEST QUOTES…

Pan-Pot play Groove on the Grass, Friday March 11, Emirates Golf Course, 6pm-3am.

On their name…

We were looking for a name for our project and used our little “ABC for music production” book and looked up plenty of terms. When we hit Pan-Pot we were both immediately happy with it - and still are! Pan-Pot = Panoramic Potentiometer: It’s a poti, which allows you to define a position for an audio signal in the stereo panorama.

By the way, the worst question we have to answer nearly every weekend is: “who is Pan and who is Pot?” On DJing Thomas: I started DJing at 22 with all those Missile Records and Perlon Music releases! I was a big fan of all that really deep stuff, no one danced when I was playing at the beginning.

Tassilo: I was DJing Hip Hop at 15, but not too seriously. Five years later I befriended some DJs in my hometown and they showed me how to DJ House, Techno, Drum’n’Bass and other styles. I actually started DJing within a pretty broad spectrum of electronic music.

On minimal techno Tassilo: Actually, I love the fact that you have to be able to find the right few elements and add them into the mix in the right way. I think it is more challenging to do something great with less than stuffing a track full of endless elements.

Why they’re reluctant remixers Tassilo: Pretty soon after we released our first EP we got our first remix request for Mathias Schaffhäuser - Lost Vox on Ware Records.

He was a huge name for us as he was famous with his song “Hey Little Girl”. We were excited because everything was really new to us. Remixing is pretty different to doing an original track as you get something that you have to build up your ideas on. Nowadays we are really picky with requests as we think this whole remix business has become pure namedropping. We only accept remixes if we are able to imagine our own version of the original track.

On being ground breaking Tassilo: Are there people who do music with the intention to break new ground? I think it just happens and only properly if you don’t expect it. We always had a lot of fun in the studio experimenting with audio material. Our way of doing a kind of sound designed Techno/Tech-House made our productions a bit different. Adding another dimension wasn’t our definition, just trying to sound different to how other producers sounded.

Cover Feature On the ups and downs of being a DJ Thomas: Travelling is not really the fun part and in the beginning I was totally scared of flying but now it is OK. But there was a time when I cancelled flights or a plane had to stop shortly before take off because I was freaking out. The good part of course is the great parties, crowds and countries we are able to experience.

Our annual Sonar rooftop party in Barcelona is definitely one of my faves. I also fell in love with Lima and Buenos Aires, but also South America in general. The enthusiasm of the people there is just amazing.

Tassilo: Traveling can get really exhausting, all this waiting and running through airports is very tiring but it’s all worth it as soon as you stand behind the mixer and the crowd is going off. Studio 80 in Amsterdam and Watergate Berlin are two of my favourite clubs!

On their Ibiza debut Tassilo: Our first time in Ibiza was in 2011 for Cocoon at Amnesia with Loco Dice and Sven Väth. It was our first ever live performance. We were so nervous as we’d never played live before. It felt like being at a school exam, we felt so relieved after we finished.

Thomas: I remember the after party with Sven Väth in someone’ s Villa, somewhere in the mountains, with people we didn’t know.

It was very fun.

MARCH 11

APRIL 8

MAY 13

Fast Eddie

HARD HOUSE/TRANCE DJ EDDIE HALLIWELL IS BACK IN ACTION, WITH HIS BOSH TOURS SELLING OUT ACROSS THE UK, AND NOW A RETURN SLOT IN DUBAI AT CHAMELEON CLUB ON FEBRUARY 25

Hello from Dubai! Describe Eddie Halliwell the DJ in 2016?

I’m a DJ who keeps an open mind when it comes to music… I don’t like to stick to one particular genre, that would be quite boring. I like to mix things up and keep it interesting. I always describe the music I play as energetic and uplifting.

You’ve got a busy schedule coming up including a Far East tour in Taiwan, Hong Kong, Jakarta and then Inverness – that’s some schedule! What are you looking forward to the most?

Obviously the gigs! I really enjoy the Far East crowds, they’re always up for it, which is something I love, I feed off their energy. It’s also nice to be able to travel the world and experience different cultures, taking in a few rays along the way!

You’re also taking your BOSH tour across

We have five pairs of tickets to give away.

Head to infusion.ae

the UK, is there still the same enthusiasm for the nights as when you started? And do you get many new clubbers coming out?

The response has been fantastic.

We had 2 sell out shows in the phase 1 launch and have just announced phase 2 which is coming to Manchester, Northern Ireland and Wales. I’ve been surprised with how many new young clubbers it has attracted, which is great to see, bring on the BOSH!

You were always regarded as a highly skilled technical DJ – is that less important now for DJs today with all the technological advances?

There are many different aspects which make up a good DJ, technical ability is just one of them and I think it’s as important today as it always has been. Having technical ability and a good understanding of the equipment you are using allows you to be a far more creative artist/performer and connect with the crowd in front of you.

Where do popular genres deep house and EDM sit with you?

I feel the EDM world has been over saturated, when you keep hearing the same things you tend to switch off. There are so many different genres out there these days and things are changing all the time. When searching for music I go through lots of styles and tend to look for anything that’s interesting, new and different, just good music really!

And what should we look forward to from your set in Dubai?

I am excited to perform at Chameleon Club Dubai! You should expect a full fire mix of house, trance and techno! Catch me there on the 25th of February.

Eddie Halliwell, Chameleon Club, Byblos Hotel Tecom, Thursday February 25, 10pm-3am

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO B.O.B

Cavalli’s big hitting urban night Rosay continues to bring in the top names, with American rapper B.O.B confirmed to make his Middle East debut on Wednesday February 24

His real name is Bobby Ray Simmons and he has been making music since 2006. An American rapper, his first single ‘Nothin’ On You’ featured Bruno Mars on guest vocals and earned him the No.1 spot in America, England and Holland.

Oh, and it was nominated for 3 Grammys, pretty good work for your first ever single.

More musical magic was to come in the shape of ‘Airplanes’ and ‘Magic,’ both of which hit the Billboard Top 10 cementing his position as a big deal on the hip hop/RnB circuit.

He’s collaborated with Jessie J, Andre 3000, Lil Wayne and Nelly, while his dream collaboration would be with James Blake and Skrillex.

He’s released 4 studio album to date, the latest being 2015’s Psycadelik Thoughtz which – surprisingly – was released with no promo or prerelease singles.

Oh yeah, and he believes the earth is flat He took to social media this January to tell us all that the Earth is flat. Noted astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson responded to B.O.B on Twitter whereupon they got into an unlikely beef, even trading diss tracks back and forth, before Neil settled it with this quote in his video: “It’s a fundamental fact of calculus and non-Euclidean

geometry. Small sections of large curved surfaces will always look flat to little creatures that crawl upon it ... And by the way, this is called gravity” Tyson said, dropping his mic. Sorry B.O.B, but Neil won that round.

Rosay feat. B.O.B, Wednesday February 24, Cavalli, 9pm3am.

OPEN AIR: TECHNO STAGE

GREEN ARENA: HOUSE STAGE

The Engine Room You’ve got an action-packed line up this season, who are you most looking forward to?

This year we’ve published our full line up in advance until Ramadan so maybe it stands out between all the bling. Yes it is an actionpacked line up and we are looking forward to all of them. First we are very excited on having our International residents A Guy Called Gerald and Delano Smith back. Of the new bookings, the ones that we’ve had on the radar for long time are DVS1, Zenker Brothers and the modular master Steevio.

You have a very dedicated following, who even have their own name, Roomers – why do you think you get such dedication?

Honestly I think they value the dedication that Analog Room puts into the project and they give the love back. What Analog Room does is for the people and their city’s music culture. Having fun can be found in many places but I don’t know what other event I would dedicate my following too if I would really care about music. We have the sound, there are no props, no tables – it’s like Cheers, a place where everyone knows your name.

A truly unique night in the Middle East, Analog Room is a national treasure on the dance music scene, having brought Francois K, Derrick May and Theo Parrish to town as well as countless truly underground acts. Ahead of their new season, we caught up with main man Mehdi Ansari to talk music culture, acid driving and what makes a Roomer…

Your in car acid house sessions went viral in style (Google acid car drive Dubai) – do you think that helped show another side to Dubai?

I hope it did. Half of the electronic music industry knows about the project and that’s a very good thing for the reputation of Dubai.

Some people think it is dangerous, but actually it is even safer than looking at the passenger seat. All the programming is done when the car is parked and while driving I just turn knobs that I know where they are, so eyes are on the road. It’s like increasing the car stereo volume with a little difference.

You book very, very underground artists – does it take a lot of persuasion to their management/agents to get them to come over?

Analog Room has a big reputation overseas so most of the artists and the agencies know of Analog Room and its concept. Most of the time they are actually very keen to come and play for us and for the ones who are not sure about coming down, well we give them time.

Many times requests actually come from their side.

You get a lot of good international press from Resident Advisor and Red Bull – what does that mean to you?

When the big names in the industry take notice, to me, it means we are doing it right. I believe it is good for the city to get the recognition and I hope it makes people think about why Analog Room is on their radar.

Who are your resident Djs and why did they get the job?

This is the most important subject here. Residents are the ones who represent the city and we have to be so careful who we support and label as our local residents. Analog Room have local and international residents.

Siamak Amidi, Nasrawi, Salar Ansari, Shadi Megallaa, Shaun Soomro and Azim Fathi are our local artists who we are really proud of. They are some of the best artists that this city have

ever had. These guys have a very arty and underground approach to the whole electronic music production and Djing. They don’t try to do PR and advertisement for themselves, especially the Dubai way. Underground has a meaning and it’s not just wearing black stuff and play techno. We have always invited other great local acts like Adam Rahman, Omar Jayyusi, Paulo Martinez, Tristan Gaurlt and Kambiz Kia. If someone’s not been before, how would you describe what the night does?

Real underground clubbing experience. Quality music, quality sound and the real vibe.

Analog Room vs Boogie Box, Thursday February 25 Analog Room feat. Raybone Jones, Thursday March 3 analogroom.com

My Music – Sandy Rivera Ahead of his return to Dubai for Hed Kandi at XL on Thursday March 3, we caught up with the Kings of Tomorrow star to talk about his music…

What track are you most proud of making?

Good question and a smile comes. I am lucky to say many at this stage of my career. ‘Finally’ would be top of my list because you can still play it. Jamie Jones played a loop of the track at the BPM festival 2016 and the crowd still goes crazy. I also have ‘Changes’, ‘Fall For You’, EBTG vs Soulvision and plenty more to be proud of.

Which track could you play in any set?

Hardrive’s ‘Deep Inside’. You can play almost any new mix that has that vocal on it or just drop the vocal over just about anything in every set. It’s another timeless vocal.

First track you fell in love with?

Marshall Jefferson’s ‘Move Your Body’ on Trax. I was clubbing to tunes like this and I remember hearing it the first time in a club when Little Louie Vega played it. To be in a dark club in NYC with a huge sound system and then this comes on! The whole crowd erupted, he had to play it twice or extend it with two vinyls. So much good music came from that time.

Which track do you wish you’d made?

Frankie Knuckles ‘Tears’. This is what I spent most of my career trying to do. A good solid song that works on the floor and has a lot of soul to it.

First track you ever released?

I had to go to Discogs for this one! It ws inn 1992 as the Awesome Foursome (It’s ok to laugh at the name), ‘Right Now’ and ‘Break The Ice’. I remember paying 25 dollars an hour to make one of the tunes and it was my first time ever in the studio at someone’s house. After that, I got to make my own label, bought some kit and just kept producing.

We have a pair of tickets to give away.

Head to infusion.ae

What track is working in your sets at the moment?

Roland Clark ‘I Get Deep,’ the Emanuel Satie Rework. I have been playing it in every set since I got it. It’s a timeless vocal and this mix is just perfect for any set these days.

What’s your musical guilty pleasure?

Madonna ‘Like A Virgin.’ You can’t tell me you don’t love that record too!

Track you wish you’d never played in a set?

I clearly remember being in Zurich with Jamie Lewis about 17 years ago. I played the wrong side of a record by mistake and you could see people looking at me and wondering why would he would ever play this mix of that song. My headphones were distorting so it was hard to hear what side I needed to play. I honestly thought I was playing the correct mix. The tune was Paul Johnson’s ‘Get Get Down’ from 1999 and it was not the original mix. I did play the correct mix at some point and the crowd was happy.

Hed Kandi feat. Sandy Rivera, XL, Thursday March 3, 9pm -3am, AED150.

UK pop star Example returns to the UAE for a headline show for Club MTV at Nasimi on Friday March 4.

Ahead of his show with DJ Luck & MC Neat and the Artful Dodger, we took a look back at some of his best interview quotes

On playing the kazoo “I'm not really much of a button pusher. I'm probably more the way I'd imagine Eminem and Dr. Dre produce, which is with a musician or an engineer and just telling them how you want something to sound. I will actually hum a riff and then get a kazoo and play out the melody.

Example

Making an

Then that gets turned into like a synth and then I'll go through drums and the bass line.”

On going to No.1 "I don't care about No.1s. The day my album went to No 1, I played Wembley stadium as part of a Capital Radio show – we were the only people who

got the whole place bouncing.

After the gig I was told we were No.1, I had a steak dinner and went home to bed. You know, I released a song in 2004 that sold 100 copies. I've done about 20 music videos. When I went to No. 1 the only thing I really thought was: 'About time.'"

On bass music "This bass-music scene, me and Chase & Status and Wretch 32 and Skream and Benga and all the others? This is the new punk rock for kids – and I want to become its first proper star."

On his first 2 albums “The first album was a mess, a warped version of me and it didn't connect. Won't Go Quietly was all over the place, I didn't much like that either. It upset my cheeseometer.”

On being bullied at school “People took the p*** out of me so much. It was the way I looked mostly. By the time I was 18 I had all this pent-up energy.

I had been turned away by girls for years. All the kids at school were like, ‘Look at your teeth, your nose, your mouth, your face.’ I got so used to everyone saying ‘you’ll never do anything’, ‘you’ll never get picked for the school football team’, ‘you’ll never get that girl’. As soon as I left school I took on a new persona. I decided to go out and prove everyone wrong.”

On ambition I'm 33 and I only realised I wanted to be in music when I was 21. I knew nothing about the industry. I can't play any instruments. I didn’t know how I was going to do it but I just knew I belonged on that stage.

No one ever talks about me as the best rapper or singer but I can sing and I can rap and I don’t sound like anyone else. Also, my contacts book is one of the best in the industry. I can call up Graham Coxon. Gary Lightbody, Ed Sheeran, Calvin Harris… I’ve used all of that, my ambition, and my stage show to propel me to the next level. The stage show is what I love doing the most. It’s how we convert people.”

On his magic formula "I have a formula now. Some people try and be too creative and too artistic, and I fully rate that, but all I really want is to get people dancing in clubs and at festivals. It used to be Basement Jaxx or Groove Armada that were the top of the tree, now it's me or Pendulum or Chase & Status. The people want uplifting rave music, so I think, why not simply give the people what they want?"

Club MTV feat. Example, Nasimi, Friday March 4, 6pm3am, tickets AED145 advance from Platinumlist.net

ON THE RADAR MARCH 11

BACK2BASICS FEAT. JOHN DIGWEED

Pacha Ibiza Dubai

MARCH 11

MY DIGITAL ENEMY

XL

MARCH 11

MARCH 17 BACK2BASICS FEAT. MARCO V Pacha Ibiza Dubai

MARCH 18 PLUS MINUS FEAT. DEETRON Level 41

MARCH 18

GROOVE ON THE GRASS FEAT. PAN-POT

DANNY RAMPLING

MARCH 17 DARA O’BRIAIN World Trade Centre

MARCH 24 JACK PAROW Dek on 8

Emirates Golf Course

Zero Gravity

For a full list of what’s on, please head to infusion.ae

MARCH 24

UB40 & BILLY OCEAN

Tennis Stadium

MARCH 25

APRIL 14

BACK2BASICS FEAT. HERNAN CATTANEO

Pacha Ibiza Dubai

APRIL 22

UMMET OZCAN

PLUS MINUS FEAT. DANNY HOWELLS & MATT TOLFREY

MARCH 25 NICKY MINAJ

PAUL VAN DYK

MARCH 31 SUPERHEROES FEAT. ROSKA Dek on 8

APRIL 28 SUPERHEROES FEAT. KIDNAP KID Dek on 8

XL

The Venue (Dubai Outlet Mall)

Level 41

APRIL 28

Zero Gravity

We’ve re-worked our listings – one-off events will appear in the magazine, for everything else please check infusion.ae for our day-to-day listings.

For inclusion, email andy@infusion.ae Pick up a copy from our Infusion Magazine stands at these locations and more across the city Every A+E outlet, Every MMI outlet, Double Decker, Media One, Zero Gravity, 360 club, Casa Latina, Barasti, Pure Sky Lounge, Beatz and Cuts, McGettigans JLT/DWC, Music Room, Nasimi, Story Rooftop, Y Not Lounge, Bliss Lounge, Zinc, Atelier M, La Terrasse, The Scene

TUESDAY 23 Sub-Culture feat. Tommy Outside & Somalie, Chameleon Club (Tecom) Mid-week techno from Tommy Outside, Somalie and Maga.

10pm-3am, free.

Dubai Jazz Festival feat. Toto, Media City Amphitheatre Live pop rock from the ‘Africa’ stars, with support from Brit rock band James and Postmodern Jukebox. 8pm, tickets from AED325

INFUSION PICK! Jillionaire, Cirque Le Soir Major Lazer’s Jillionaire hits the decks: expect plenty of MJ classics like ‘Lean On’ and ‘Pon De Floor.’ 10pm-3am.

THURSDAY 25 WEDNESDAY 24 B.O.B, Cavalli American rapper – and a fan of the flat earth theory – performs his hits live at Cavalli. 9pm-3am.

Analog Room meets Boogie Box, Q Underground Analog Room team up with Abu Dhabi’s Boogie Box founder Hassan Alwan for a night of underground electronic music.

10pm-3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Back2Basics feat. James Zabiela, Pacha Ibiza Dubai The tech house DJ wizard returns to DXB for another sure-to-be stellar show. 10pm3am, ladies free until midnight, AED120.

Deep Like feat. Schlepp Geist, GQ Bar Cult deep house party host German DJ Schlepp Geist. 10pm3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Eddie Halliwell, Chameleon Hard house, trance and techno from the re-vitalised early 2000s DJ who’ll be bringing his high energy mixing and music to Chameleon. 10pm-3am, AED150.

Benny Benassi, Cavalli House and electro from the Italian DJ behind ‘Satisfaction’ at the high end Sheikh Zayed Road club. 10pm-3am.

INFUSION PICK! Deep Crates Cartel 5th Annual J Dilla night, Velocity The DCC crew celebrate the life and music of hip hop legend J Dilla, with his younger brother Illa J on headline duty.

10pm-3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Dubai Jazz Festival feat.

David Gray & Chris Botti feat. Sting, Dubai Media City Amphitheatre A large double header as Brit troubadour David Gray is supported by Chris Botti and Sting. 8pm, tickets from AED395.

INFUSION PICK! Sam Divine, Zero Gravity One of our favourite female DJs, Sam Divine is an Ibiza regular and signed to Defected.

6pm-3am, free before 10pm, ladies free before midnight, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Robin Schulz, Nasimi Expect modern day dance music from the ‘Prayer In C’ star who brought thousands to Nasimi last time he played.

9pm-3am.

INFUSION PICK! Superheroes feat. Dance Off Soundsystem, Dek on 8 The bass/house night returns with UK fourtet Dance Off Soundsystem supplying the moves and the music. 6pm3am, free.

Twice As Nice feat.

Donae’o, Industrial Avenue (The Westin) Urban brand Twice as Nice returns to Dubai with their mix of RnB, hip hop, funky and UK Garage. 10pm-3am.

FRIDAY 26 INFUSION PICK! Audio tonic vs Shibuya, 360 Swiss DJ Mendo brings his deep house beats alongside Frak Fu, Megadon Betamax, Smokingroove and audio tonic main man Mr Mr. 4pm-3am, free entry.

INFUSION PICK! DXBeach feat. Tiesto, Zero Gravity The all day/night party returns to Zero Gravity, with Tiesto, Mambo Brothers, BFG and Fever and more on the bill.

12pm-3am, AED275, AED400 with poolside access.

Jackmaster & Kenny Glasgow, Blue Marlin Ibiza UAE Scottish mix master Jackmaster returns after impressing last time around, with support from ex Art Department DJ Kenny Glasgow.

11am-late.

Dubai Jazz Festival feat.

Santana & La Bomba De Tiempo, Dubai Media City Amphitheatre

Esquire, XL Bootleg champion and Coldplay remixer Esquire headlines with his fun take on house music.

10pm-3am, AED100.

Something Big Yacht Party feat. Sam Binga & Ant TC1, Pier 7

Guitar virtuoso Santana headlines the last night of the Jazz Fest (air guitars at the ready), with support from drum group La Bomba De Tiempo.

8pm, tickets from AED395.

Drum and Bass crew Something Big return to the high seas for another afternoon session with footwork/hip hop DJ Sam Binga joined by Metalheadz star Ant TC1. 3-7pm. somethingbigdubai@gmail.com

House of Afrika feat.

Elaouad, Dek on 8

Deep Like feat. David Mayer, GQ Bar

The DJ Magazine Breakthrough DJ winner and ex Pure resident DJ goes through his ace house/ garage/afro record box. 6pm3am, free.

More deep house action from the Deep Like crew, with Berlin DJ Mayer guesting. 10pm-3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Heidi, Eden Heidi brings her bouncy, Jackathon sound to Eden for a full on house party. Middaylate.

THURSDAY 3 Analog Room feat Raybone Jones, Q Undergound Underground techno from Detroit’s Raybone, with support from Tehran DJ Payam Parvizi.

10pm-3am, AED100.

Deep Like feat. David Mayer, GQ Bar More deep house action from the Deep Like crew, with Berlin DJ Mayer guesting. 10pm-3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Hed Kandi feat. Sandy Rivera, XL The Kings of Tomorrow star brings his funky deep house and tech-house sounds to XL thanks to Hed Kandi. 10pm3am, AED150.

Van Gogh Live, Music Room Serbian band Van Gogh bring their 9 albums of music to the Music Room for a hit packed performance. 9pm-3am, AED150.

FRIDAY 4 Afrocentric feat. Da Capo, Square Free Afro house night Afrocentric returns for its monthly party, with South African DJ Da Capo headlining. 10pm-3am.

INFUSION PICK! Club MTV feat. Example, Nasimi Example and tour DJ Wire drop a 60 minute set of festival classics like ‘Kickstarts’ with support from DJ Luck & MC Neat and more. 6pm-3am, AED145 advance.

NFUSION PICK! Sidney Samson & Kenny Dope, Blue Marlin Ibiza UAE New and old school house with Masters at Work star Kenny Dope joined by fast-rising house star Sidney Samson.

11am-late.

House of Afrika, Dek on 8 Cult weekly night House of Afrika takes over the Dek on 8 decks, dropping deep, soulful, Afro tech house. 6pm-3am, free.

SATURDAY 5

Jnr Kelly feat. Rastyle, Music Room Jamaican star Junior Kelly, behind ‘If Love So Nice’ performs live with support from Kenyan performer Rastyle. 9pm-3am, AED100.

INFUSION PICK! Plus Minus feat. Mathew Jonson, Level 41 Wagon Repair’s main man Jonson drops a live, melodic house and techno set with support from Bella Sarris.

10pm-3am, AED80 advance.

INFUSION PICK! Piknic Electronik feat.

Claptone, The Montgomerie Dubai A huge booking for the family friendly house music festival, as the man behind some of 2015’s biggest house tracks touches down for his Piknic debut. 1-9pm, tickets from AED130.

WEEKLY DJ SHOW LIVE FROM THURSDAYS 4 - 6 PM

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LOOK AND

LISTEN

Music be the food of love, so read on...

• MUSIC NEWS •DEATH TO METAL? •DJ BOOTH • MUSIC THAT MATTERS

Look and Listen

Music News RUBIN’S IMPERIAL MARCH

Legendary producer Rick Rubin has pulled together a Star Wars Headspace album featuring A-Trak, Flying Lotus, Kaskade, Rustie, Galantis, Bonobo and more. The album uses iconic sounds from the Star Wars including Darth Vader’s breathing and RdD2’s bleeps and bloops and is released digitally on February 19.

DJ BLISS RELEASES DEBUT ALBUM Longstanding DJ and TV presenter DJ Bliss has released his debut album, Made In Dubai. Created in collaboration with beatmaker Prince Q, the album features a host of UAE talent including Hamdan Al Abri, Dia Hassan from Juliana Down, N1yah and Clarita De Quiroz.

The album is out via Universal Music, and follows his single with MIMS and Daffy last year ‘Shining’ which clocked over a million Youtube views.

Death To Metal?

“We will never, ever, ever stop and we will be back stronger”

There was outrage on Social Media recently as Swallow The Sun’s highly anticipated death metal gig at the Music Room last week was cancelled after a complaint that the band promoted ‘devil worship.’ We spoke to Moutasem Kabbani CEO of Metal Records and the man behind the event to get to the root of the problem

We were very sorry to hear about the last minute cancellation of the heavy metal event – on your official statement, it says that a ‘competitor’ complained to the authorities that the band celebrated devil-worshipping, and they wouldn’t allow the band permits to play.

Who complained, and how do you know they were a competitor?

We know it’s a competitor because we previously had two events cancelled where we managed to get the name of the person. The DTCM were requested to reject the permission for the Swallow The Sun event from a higher authority.

You’d obviously spent a lot of money on the event (flights, fee, backline, promotion etc), can you claim any of the money back?

Yes it was a big loss for us.

Luckily the band members from Swallow The Sun were very helpful and understood the situation - they refunded the band fees and to support us they came to Dubai for a meet and greet with their UAE fans and those who had flown in from across the region.

There were hundreds of comments on Social Media after the news – can the

metal scene survive setbacks like this?

The cancellation news sadly went viral, people were complaining about how things works here, a concert got cancelled because someone complained and the authority didn’t bother to check or investigate about it, they just rejected. The band’s lyrics are about nature and love and have nothing to do with “devil worshiping.

This has happened before with heavy metal events getting cancelled at the last minute…

It was our event too, I received an email from the venue manager saying that an angry Emirati parent complained that the event was offensive and he would not let his 21+ years old son to attend such event.

Will events like this stop you putting on events in the region?

I had thought about stopping putting on events after the second gig cancellation, but when I saw the support and motivational messages that came from the metalheads from all around the world, I changed my mind. We run the events out of passion, money is not our motive. So we will never ever ever stop and we will be back stronger. facebook.com/MetalEastRecords

DJ BOOTH: FUENTE

Growing producer Fuente (look out for the name Kicks & Keys this year) is also a star DJ with guest slots at bass/house night Superheroes One thing you might not know about me is... I used to be a drummer/cajon slapper for an acoustic band before DJing.

My worst ever job was… Thankfully, I have never had a job that I hated but I have been in organizations where the culture was awful with long meaningless hours and bad management.

My favourite ever record is... ‘Quero Ver Voce No Baile’ by Paula Lima of Brazil. For me, it has the perfect combination of funk, soul and jazz fusion with a beautiful vocal. I can never get tired of listening to her songs even though I don’t understand the lyrics...

DJing is much like… My day job in marketing strategy you analyze what works and continue doing that. The only difference is you’re reading people’s energy in the moment which is way more challenging than numbers on an Excel sheet.

Dubai’s clubbing scene is... Exciting in the sense that there’s always something for someone whether you’re into house, indie, techno, hip-hop, and commercial music. Although there are some weekends where it’s quite difficult to choose where to go with the overwhelming number of events, it’s still great that people have the choice.

I’m really proud of... Starting this journey of being a DJ in Dubai where top talents thrive. It’s inspiring meeting the heavyweight DJs in the city, knowing their stories and sharing their tips here and there. I’m also proud of our new collab, Kicks & Keys.

My biggest DJ achievement to date is... Surprising my Dad in one of my Superheroes gigs. He came to Dubai last year for his birthday and was bugging to see me play so my wife tricked my parents one Thursday evening to go out for drinks at Media One and were surprised to see I was behind the decks playing.

What is your guiltiest pleasure? Trap, Moombahton and Jersey Club. I used to put up mixes on these genres before I discovered my love for House music though I still love playing these tracks at home.

If you could DJ in any decade which would it be...

Definitely during the disco/funk years in the 70s - 80s and I’d start my set with Manu Dibango’s ‘Soul Makossa.’

If I could go back-to-back with any other DJ it would be... Smokingroove on the local scene (I hope they’ll create a night promoting upcoming DJs and they’ll go B2B with them...) and Kissy Sell Out on the international side - that guy’s a technical beast. soundcloud.com/fuentebeats23

MUSIC THAT MATTERS MIND 10 – THE LIFE OF MAKS

Dark, driving techno mix recorded live from recent Dysfunktion guest Maks

DAVID GUETTA WARM UP – MADJAM

Full 3 hour warm up mix from NYE that moves very smoothly through house music genres, including live crowd noises (and maDJam’s MC skills). soundcloud.com/madjam/david-guettawarmup-livepeppermint-experience-nye2016-dubai-media-city

ALEX HOOK FEAT. SHYAM – WALK INTO THE NIGHT

Arcade 82’s vocalist teams up with Alex Hook for this epic sunset deep house tune that’s been climbing the charts. /soundcloud.com/spiritsoulrecords/sets/ alex-hook-feat-shyam-walk

Send tracks/edits/remixes to: andy@infusion.ae

soundcloud.com/thelifeofmaks/mind10

MARIO BAZOURI & MICHKA – TORMENTA

DXB producers Bazouri and Michka team up for their first of several releases, a melodic, pulsing techno track out now on Beirut’s VL Records. soundcloud.com/vlrecords/sets/vl148mario-bazouri-michka

KAYTEK – FEBRUARY PODCAST

Eden’s resident DJ drops a 2 hour set full of deep, techy grooves and cuts from Lee Van Dowski, Nick Warren and The Box. . soundcloud.com/kay-tek/kaytek-februarypodcast-2016

ARCADE 82 – WATCHING THE SUNRISE

This live classic gets a long-awaited release on Spirit Soul records, perfect sunset nudisco vibes. soundcloud.com/spiritsoulrecords/sets/ arcade-82-watchin-the

SCOTT FORSHAW & GREG STAINER – SOMEONE LIKE YOU

The Hollaphonic production dream team combine for Nervous Records with this energetic, garage-tinged slice of house. soundcloud.com/nervous-records/scottforshaw-greg-stainer-someone-like-you

LOOKING

CLOSER Opinions, thoughts and gibberish...

•WEIRD NEWS • THE SPIN •DOM JOLY •EAT SLEEP RAVE REPEAT • ANGRY MONKEY

Looking Closer

Weird News

BOTTLE OF MCDONALD’S BIG MAC BURGER SAUCE SELLS FOR AN INCREDIBLE £65,900 ON EBAY That’s right, someone paid AED300,000 for a bottle of the Big Mac sauce which has been kept a trade secret for the last 70 years.

DID YOU KNOW… A new TV series looked at 9 of the weirdest things we routinely eat, and Beaver anal gland secretions were high on the list. Seriously.

Castoreum is a tasty additive made from the secretions of glands near the anus of beavers. They use it to mark their territory and attract a mate: we use it as a sweet vanilla, strawberry and raspberry flavouring in drinks and sweets. We’d just like to know which inquisitive mind first decided to try this out…

LOST CAUSES What do a prosthetic leg, AED75,000 in cash, an urn and drum kits have in common? They have all been lost and handed in on London Transport. To date, they’ve had over 300,000 items deposited, including the urn which was reunited with its owner 7 years after being lost. Housed in a three storey building, the depot contains thousands of phones, wallets and umbrellas Around 25% of the items are handed back to their owners, with the rest being given to charity or sold at auction for charity.

THE SPIN FEBRUARY 2016

PAGE 217

ISSUE 37

RAVE AGAINST THE MACHINE

Confusion reigned yesterday when an army of music fans descended upon an anti-technology rally.

Organisers of the rally consider the rapid rise in technology and artificial intelligence to be humanity’s greatest threat and gather annually to discuss their concerns. Renowned physicist Stephen Hawking is amongst their many supporters and was the keynote speaker at the gathering.

Problems began when a large group, dressed in black, approached the demonstrators and quickly became restless. A member of the disillusioned troupe provided The Spin with an insight: “We were all hanging out and saw a big crowd in the distance who looked like they were having it right off. They were waving these ‘Tech No!’ banners and going mental. We all love a party but were massively disappointed when we got there. We heard some sick vocoder lyrics and were waiting for the beat to drop but it just never arrived. On reflection, this may be some sort of new ambient techno movement so I’m prepared to give it another listen. It’s definitely better than that deep house stuff we were listening to last year.”

The arrival of police immediately eased tensions when their sirens appeared to attract the revellers. The rally continued peacefully without further incident. *These stories are not true, this is not a real newspaper. This is a parody/fiction/satire/joke. The Spin is not intended, in any way whatsoever, to be taken as factual.

A JOLY GOOD MAN

DID YOU KNOW TRIGGER HAPPY TV’S MAIN MAN DOM JOLY WAS BORN IN LEBANON? OR THAT HE’S IN TOWN FOR THE EMIRATES FESTIVAL OF LITERATURE? OR THAT HE SUFFERS FROM COULROPHOBIA? SAM MOULT GETS TO GRIPS WITH THE UK FUNNY MAN

Your book, ‘Here Comes The Clown: A Stumble Through Show Business’ is being featured at the Emirates Airline Festival of Literature, among other creative writing works. Has it really been ‘a stumble through show business’ for you?

Yes, this book is really a guide for how not to “do” showbiz.

I can’t commit to anything and tend to jump around doing all sorts of different things and invariably get into trouble. I’ve had a lot of fun, however. This book documents the highs and the embarrassing lows. I just wish I could have read it before I started…

How different is writing comedy to being in it?

Very different - the main thing is that, unlike in television you retain full control over the end product. People tend to meddle and stick their oar into television work, especially as you get more successful. The real joy of comedy writing however is that you are not limited by physical things - you can go a lot more surreal and internal.

Can you tell us what are you currently writing?

I am currently researching my next book that will be something of a sequel to my travel book - The Dark Tourist.

I love travelling to supposedly “dangerous” places and finding the normality and fun to be had there.

Some of your books and shows have seen you travel around the world. Is travel a passion for you or are you in search of comedy and adventure?

Travel is my passion and comedy is my paymaster. I live to travel.

There is nothing more exciting to me than the moment you step off a plane/boat/train into a new destination. I am a kind of middle-aged Tintin.

How appropriate is ‘Here Comes The Clown’ to you? Is this a situation that you find yourself in often?

I have an uncanny ability to find the wrong thing to do in a situation and go for it. It has lead me into many an interesting experience but I wouldn’t recommend it if you are looking for a quiet life. Ironically, I suffer from Coulrophobia- a fear of clowns.

What tips would you give for an aspiring comedy writer?

Be funny, write about what you know and try to make yourself laugh as that’s the only thing you can be sure of.

Let’s talk Trigger Happy. The show was (and still is) one of the funniest (and first) ‘prank’ shows on TV. Did you ever see it becoming as big as it did?

No, never. I just made it with a friend and really we were just trying to make each other laugh.

When it went on telly we were so excited but never thought it would be the UK or worldwide hit it was. We sold it to over 70 countries and I’m still not sure how it happened. I’m very proud of it however, it was a work of love.

How did you come up with a lot of the ideas for Trigger Happy?

Mainly just sitting at meals with Sam who I made it with. We became a bit obsessed and were constantly thinking of stuff. I’d spot a milkman and think “Ooh, we haven’t done anything with one of those…” Next day I’d be in a milkman costume having giant cats stealing all the milk from my float…

Post-Trigger Happy we saw you in a range of TV shows.

Which was the most fun and can we expect more?

I adored a show that I made called “Dom Joly’s Happy Hour” in which I went round the world with my best friend Pete. It was a gentle spoof of all those celebrity travel shows but god did we have fun! We even drove through the Syrian desert just before the terrible events that have befallen that country.

Nowadays ‘pranksters’ can often be seen on the Internet doing all sorts of ‘pranks’.

What is your opinion towards these people and what they are doing?

I hate the word “pranks,” it tends to describe idiots doing

idiotic things. I’m a bit of a snob when it comes to hidden camera and to me, Prankers are a bit low-brow. They are a bit frat-boy level and most don’t make me laugh. Having said that occasionally amazing things comes out of weird places like Brazil or Russia.

Not many people know this, but you were born in Beirut and studied Arabic. Coming back to the Middle East, what are you expecting?

I travel to the Middle East a lot.

I will fly round the world for a good Lebanese meal and there a couple of fabulous Lebanese places in Dubai so I’m already salivating.

The Emirates Airline Festival of Literature is a big event where we celebrate some of the best local and international writers. How does your work fit into the region, or is comedy a truly international language?

My comedy has sold all over the world and I think that’s because a large proportion of it is visual. There is something very special about making someone who doesn’t speak your language laugh. I grew up as an Englishman in Levantine Lebanon, an old French colony so my influences are, like the Middle East, an exotic melting pot.

Dom Joly, Here Comes The Clown, Saturday March 12, 1.30-2.30pm, Intercontinental Festival City, emirateslitfest.com/

Eat Sleep Rave Repeat Holy Cow Stephen Day checks into new Al Qasr joint The Hide to check if it meats his expectations‌

I’m writing this sat on a train, cutting its way through the Swedish countryside, heading to eat at the 25th best restaurant on the planet. Why would I or anyone want to do that, why did I jump on a plane for 6hrs, then a train for a further 7 just to eat some food? Well it’s simple, it’s because Fäviken is the only place on the planet serving it.

Everything is grown or raised within its land and then expertly prepared for the 18 people lucky enough to have made the journey that night. Nothing is shipped in and everything is seasonal to the day. What’s that got to do with The Hide, well it’s traceability and it’s important.

The Hide has its own butcher, and they exclusively import the finest Spanish beef. Ethically sourced from a single farm where the cows are free range and left to enjoy a minimum of 8 years, they’re then slaughtered as humanely as possible, brought to Dubai and then air dried (in full view of the restaurant) for a minimum 21 days. Which means you know exactly what you’re eating.

As you may have guessed, The Hide is predominantly a steak house, but not like you’ve experienced in Dubai before.

Downstairs to the left of the Al Qasr hotel is a welcoming door and the entrance to a pseudo New York loft apartment, all open brickwork and columns, tables to the right and booths dotted everywhere. The red leather booths are all shiny and new, with dark wooden tables and lighting just the right side of sleazy.

The menus arrived and I was hit by the choice – it wasn’t just a great selection, but it focussed on some cuts of beef like hanger steak, flat iron and flank that are not as popular, but if cooked properly can taste amazing. There was also an array of eyebrow-raising dishes including braised beef cheeks, confit chicken legs and salt marsh lamb, which had me smiling with anticipation.

We started with a light chicken páte with duck pastrami and a fig jam for her, and a crispy calf’s tongue salad for me. My salad was crisp and fresh with the crunchy saltiness of the tongue offsetting the beetroot.

The páte was light and full of flavour, the jam sticky and sweet, and the pastrami brought everything together as you scooped it onto the toast.

Our knowledgable waiter Kesete cleared down and the mains arrived and the restaurant’s traceability policy made perfect sense. Forget your Dubai Kobe/ Wagyu, which by the way is from the US or Australia, not Japan, as it’s illegal to export the real stuff. The meat had a full, almost gamey taste, rich and deep in flavour, but with a delicate texture and amazingly juicy. I could happily have just eaten my Rib Eye and gone home, but alongside the duck confit onion rings and chanterelle mushroomed potatoes, I wallowed in the decadence of it all. The food was rich but my word was it tasty.

Close to bursting I finished with a creamy cheesecake soufflé and peanut butter, toasty meringue encased smores for Val. Both were lovely but in all honesty, were a little lost after the full impact of the meat hit. We could have been rolled home, so sated were we.

The Hide has enough going for it to warrant a return visit or 3, especially If you care what you’re putting into your body.

Next time you’re chowing down in town just ask ‘can you tell me where your meat comes from?’ The answers (if you get one) may shock you. That along with the in house infused spirits behind the bar and exclusive Spanish beef alone, should get you traveling a little further across town and popping the finest steak in your mouth.

The Hide, Al Qasr, Madinat Jumeirah, 04 366 6750

Death to Metal ‘Aarrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhh’ – just some of Heavy Metal’s most poignant lyrics. Sadly, for the region’s metallers – and there are a LOT, – the city has been stripped of its live music scene by a string of complaining wimps, depriving them of Shakespearean-esque lyrics like this.

The last 3 Heavy/Death Metal concerts have been cancelled due to complaints to authorities, with the latest show by Swallow The Sun pulled as it promoted ‘devil worshipping.’ A) We didn’t know Ned Flanders now lived in Dubai and B) in this internet day and age where you can literally find ANYTHING on your phone, you’re complaining about a group of Finnish head bangers losing some brain cells on a Friday night?

So, it’s OK for radio pop stars to come here spouting thinly veiled nonsense about their lover’s junk and it’s OK for OT Genarseis to play here following his ‘CoCo’ hit (clue: it ain’t about chocolate cornflakes) but death metal you can’t decipher is bad? Dubai, you are one odd, odd place.

Monkey Out...

The Angry Monkeys’ views are his own, and don’t necessarily reflect the views of Infusion Magazine.

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