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LOOKIN'! BEST FLYERS Dennis Ferrer, David Zowie, Analog Room, The Brunswick, Deep Crates Cartel, Roy Ayers and more! infusionmag
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GUEST LIST TALAL BUDEBS Publisher
CHARL CHAKA
Managing Partner charlchaka@infusion.ae
ANDY BUCHAN
Editor andy@infusion.ae
Some clever bods at the University of Pretoria have created the Hearza app that diagnoses hearing problems using your smartphone, and then links you to your nearest audiologists – perfect for DJs and clubbers who still have ringing ears several days after the weekend.
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Magazine / Sales Director vip@infusion.ae +971 050 169 8712
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Online Guru chris@infusion.ae
PAULA MANGUEIRA Design design@infusion.ae
CONTRIBUTORS: Stephen Day
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Big love to Infusioners Vip and Chris (and wives Tara and Tiff, of course) who are now staying up late looking after their beautiful new babies Kiera and Elliott instead of being out all night clubbing. Well played Sven Väth – not only did he play a storming set at Awakenings, he was also streaming the Germany match at Euro 2016 on his phone infront of the mixer. Good lad.
Tecom is now Barsha Heights? Erm, OK then. Random.com
Post summer blues, and it’s only July. Britian’s out of Europe, Trump is running for president, we’re not sure who’s more dooby ducked?
BLACK LIST
SAY WHAT? DANCEFLOOR DICTIONARY Don’t sweat it – colloquial slang for getting a taxi. EG ‘no, friend, don’t walk 50m don’t JBR to the next pub, get a cab’
OLD JOKES HOME: A woman walks into her GP’s office with a mushroom in one nostril, a carrot in the other, and a runner bean in her ear. “I think I see the problem,” said the doctor. “You’re not eating right.”
BELIEVE IT OR NOT… The Ketchup Song (Aserejé) by Las Ketchup has sold more copies than Bohemian Rhapsody.
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WE LOVE Lock, Stock & Barrel
Every so often, a new venue comes along so well thought out and perfectly formed, that it’s busy from opening day, with word of mouth travelling at the speed of sound across the city. Tucked away on the 8th floor of the Grand Millenium Hotel in Tecom, Lock Stock and Barrel is a loud, energetic two story pub and bar that has a kick-ass soundtrack (and a great live band in 13 Daze), an imaginative layout, great food, drink and service and some of the coolest toilets in the city. Oh, and they show all the sporting action, have a great Saturday roast and Friday brunch, and several pool tables. It is, in short, a perfect example of a modern day pub, and will be even busier than usual (if that’s possible), over the summer period. Get down early, you have been warned!
Lock Stock & Barrel, Grand Millenium Hotel, Tecom, 04 429 9999
THAN-Q FEAT. ARMAND VAN HELDEN @ Q43
FRED PERRY SUBSONIC FEAT. DAVE ROWNTREE (BLUR) @ STEREO ARCADE
HOUSE OF AFRIKA, THE LAST DANCE @ DEK ON 8
THURSDAY - JULY 7
Local News EVERYBODY LOVES THE SUNSHINE As the name implies, DIFC restaurant and lounge Rogue Trader like to do things a little differently. Not content with employing an excellent band (Rita and the Rogues) who play 1920 covers in unique fashion, they’ve started a series of Rogue Sessions with US funk, soul and jazz veteran Roy Ayers the next guest on July 7 and July 8. Best known for his classic track ‘Everybody Loves The Sunshine,’ he’ll be taking his Ubiquity show to Dubai for a night that blends food, drink and music. VIP tickets including a 3 course a la carte menu and free flowing drinks are AED699 for both nights, or you can get regular entry at AED200 including 2 drinks. Events in July rarely get this cultured, so don’t sleep on this welcome slice of summer funk. Roy Ayers, Rogue Traders, DIFC, eat@rtraderdubai.com or call 04 343 5518
DWA with Dimix, The Act Hip hop and RnB night DWA is back after the summer break with Skybar Beirut resident Dimix on the ones and twos. 10pm-3am, 043551116 or reservations@theactdubai.com
FRIDAY - JULY 8
Wowie Zowie It’s house every weekend at XL as UK DJ David Zowie is headlining the XLOCO party on Friday July 8. An all day party, starting with a Candypants brunch for 800 people – yes, you read that right – before the after party starts from 4pm with Mick Willow, Andy Swift and Ryan Sinclair all on DJ duties before David Zowie takes over. We caught up with him to talk about his No.1 hit ‘House Every Weekend,’ good food and football…
FRIDAY - JULY 8 A warm hello from Dubai – what are you looking forward to out here? The whole place is crazy but there is a good atmosphere in Dubai and I can't wait to come back to experience it. Congratulations on the No.1 – where were you when you heard, how did you celebrate? I was in my car driving from the radio station and had to pull over to take it all in. It was a surreal moment. I'm very grateful to everyone who supported the track, so thank you... That night I had a pool party and popped a good few bottles! And how much of a game-changer is it for you? It has changed the whole situation. I'm now travelling more than I ever did and have been to some mad places I maybe wouldn't have previously. People might not know much about you apart from your excellent breakthrough tune – what are three essential things our readers should know about David Zowie? 1 I love good music and cooking good food - I'm a great cook! 2 I'm good at football 3 I enjoy travelling We imagine this year has been a mad rush of gigs, airports and music – how has it been for you? It's taken some getting used to but once you land safe it's worth it! I've met a lot of good people and new friends from all over the world so it's been a blessing. Who's been helpful with advice on the way up, have other Djs been looking out for you? Nobody really has offered advice, I could have done with some too! The best advice I heard from anybody is to enjoy it. XLOCO and Candypants, Friday July 8, brunch 1-4pm from AED350, info@XLDubai.com or 052 634 1040
FRIDAY - JULY 8 DEEP CRATES RE-LAUNCH
What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas – so say the Deep Crates Cartel crew who have taken their hip hop/soul/funk/reggae party to the Las Vegas Night Club in Satwa. And not only will they be bringing the funk (on their booming custom made soundystem), they’ve also teamed up with Ravis for post clubbing munchies – make sure to get your 25% discount code at the door. It all takes place at the Las Vegas Night Club, Chelsey Plaza Hotel on the 9th floor.
FRIDAY - JULY 8 LOITERING WITH IN TENTS The Vibes team have pulled out all the stops for summer – not only are they throwing weekly parties in a custom built air conditioned tent at their Tamanya Terrace space, they’ve got a cracking line up including Berlin star Lake People, Bob Moses and Pillow Talk, and nudisco/funk DJ Ilija Rudman kicking off proceedings on Friday July 8. And our favourite bit? The main tent is non smoking, with smokers given their own AC area with its own bar, speakers and bean bags. Head down before 9pm and entry is just AED50 with 2 free drinks, before 10.30pm it’s AED80 and one free drink and AED100 after 10.30pm.
FRIDAY - JULY 8 WEIRD AND WONDERFUL TECHNO
Thoroughbred techno night Dysfunktion are back in action at Story Rooftop with resident Ju Lovett joined on the decks by MAKS. Expect minimal techno, weird and wonky techno and plenty of pounding bass from the homegrown party that’s making a name for itself. Story Rooftop, 10pm-3am, AED100, ladies free before midnight.
FRIDAY - JULY 8 ‘HEY HEY’ With a history of big name bookings, it’s no surprise to see New York DJ and producer Dennis Ferrer kicking off the new season at Provocateur. His 2006 track ‘Hey Hey’ propelled him even further into the mainstream, and he’s no stranger to the UAE having been making dancefloors here move for over a decade. Channeling deep soulful, tech-infused house, expect big beats and even bigger grooves. RUMOURS Creamfields is set to return to Abu Dhabi at the end of the year after a break.
Fred Perry’s SubSonic brand is back with another set of parties in September and October with more indie/alternative bands at Stereo Arcade.
Analog Room have teased some of their up-coming line up, including techno star Jeff Mills and much-hyped DJ Ben UFO.
Award-winning house night Shibuya are back with a bang this season with 4 confirmed parties at a brand new venue.
THURSDAY - JULY 14 ANALOG ROOM RETURN It’s going to be a long, hot, excellent summer for DXB’s Roomers as the Story Rooftop party returns weekly from July 14. They’ve invited back German dub techno DJ and producer Mauritz Van Oswald after his storming set 2 years ago. A big influence on electronic music since the 80s, he co-founded the Basic Channel record label specializing in dub techno and became a key part of cult club Tresor. Support on the night comes from Analog Room resident Siamak Amidi, and the music starts at 10pm at Story Rooftop.
THURSDAY - JULY 14 UK TAKEOVER AT MUSIC ROOM There’s an urban takeover at the Music Room on July 14 as Heartless Crew are joined by MOBO Award winner Lady Marga. Heartless Crew were a high flying garage trio made up of MCs Bushkin, Mighty Moe and DJ Fonti, and had several Top 20 hits and were also signed up to BBC 1Xtra for a regular Sunday night show on the radio. They’ll be represented by MC Bushkin on the night, and his tour DJ Slamma. Joining them is Lady Marga, the first woman in the UK to win a MOBO Award. She’s worked with an impressive list of talents including Basement Jaxx, Don Diablo and Mad Professor, and was part of the Crazy Itch Radio album by the Jaxx duo which sold over 1 million copies. Tickets are just AED50, with ladies free before midnight.
ON THE RADAR
JULY 22
SOMETHING BIG FEAT. PREDITAH, Story Rooftop
JULY 28
AUGUST 25
SUPERHEROES FEAT. WOZ, On 42
NOVEMBER 25
SUPERHEROES FEAT. DEEKLINE, On 42
CHEMICAL BROTHERS du Arena
JULY 29
NOVEMBER 27
EINMUSIK On 42
RIHANNA, du Arena
Dubai’s local restaurant guide
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The Infusion Design Awards Your artwork is your first introduction, your first chance to impress, to make you laugh, to make you think ‘I have to go to this night.’ Which makes it vital. With this in mind, our 2nd annual Infusion Design Awards celebrates the great and good of the region’s artwork – from challenging works of art to sleek modern flyers. Plus, we have Guest Editor Maddy Butcher – she of the incredible Dek on 8 murals – who talks us through her favourite artworks in the city…
Karak Beats A cooler than cool night that puts an emphasis on art and music, it’s no surprise to see Karak Beats’ artworks stand out in the Middle East. Beautifully rendered and region specific, it won the approval of our guest judge. MADDY: ‘While Groove on the Grass and Night Vibes are both consistently pioneering the use of art as part of their events, the 264 boys have done this passionately from the off, even organising an Al Quoz exhibition for Art Nights where music will play second priority,’ says Maddy. ‘This illustration is slick, measured in its tone, and, of course, it’s a badass Arab Music Warrior in a Blade Runner landscape. What’s not to love? Nicely done.’ Designer: Animal, an independent creative agency based in India. www.weareanimal.co. Good design is… One that strikes a conversation, and aids in human evolution in some way. What was your design brief for this artwork? Take something from the region as a visual cue and use it to convey the event happening in the city. What was the working process? It took 2-3 days to come together after the initial concept was shared. We took inspiration from the architecture of Dubai and clubbing, with the lifestyle of an urban nomad/wanderer.
Superheroes A winner from last year, Superheroes strong design ethic continues again into a new season. MADDY: ‘They’ve used strong, positive and identifiable graphics from the start, and all the way through,’ says Maddy. ‘This has been a thoughtful graduation from the initial blocky forms and logos established by Clare Napper, into a distinct Superheroes language, that makes their posters recognisable as soon as you see them - they’re not like anything else in town, and they’re confident and playful. Smart move, boys.’ Designer: Carl Cozier, www.holymolycreative.co.uk Good design is… Knowing when to start over! I suppose simplicity often wins out clear, concise and communicative. Other times, as most creatives will know, ‘Good’ can prove to be the most Illusive of beasts! What was your design brief for this artwork? The brief was to produce a “cool series of event artworks for 2015”. I was tasked to produce artworks that adhered to the established Superheroes brand values “fun, playful, silly, strange, and very colourful”. The previous designer had created some cool chimera animals and I felt an evolution of this idea into fantasy was the way to go. Towering monsters, huge monoliths and crazy robots. How long did it take to come together, what was the working process, what were you inspired by? A long time unfortunately, even for me... haha. Pushing 15 hours per piece. A lot of that time is arriving at a character that I felt fitted with the core brand identity, while remaining fresh.
Night Warriors MADDY: ‘This is stunning, slick and subtle for a change. I don’t know anything about the night, but the visual assumes the viewer is intelligent. No stars, glitter, cheesy DJ faces, t*** or ass. The design is composed and painterly, and I love the almostmonochrome palette, because it makes the whole thing strong and moodily thoughtful. Sexy 300.’ Designer: Eda Shpiliauskaite Good design is… The right combination of creativity, skills and brand knowledge. What was your design brief for this artwork? There was no brief really, but an idea of how the creative team was picturing a “Night Warriors” concept itself. It’s incredible to work on any design when you have a freedom to create. The result says all. How long did it take to come together, what was the working process, what were you inspired by? I was never able to “time” any of my first templates. It always starts with a spontaneous “mixture of ideas”. I was just scribbling things around. My inspiration was an image I have/had of a woman driven by house music. I didn’t want it to be lame and look like anything else and I used technics I’m crazy about: watercolours and sketches.
Cirque Le Soir
Capturing Cirque’s madcap atmosphere – and off the wall entertainers – isn’t an easy task. But Edu Cornejo brought everything together for the club’s 4th birthday party Designer: Edu Cornejo / educadito.carbonmade.com Good design is… Objective, innovative and functional with a clear message to connect. What was your design brief for this artwork? The key words were fun, celebration, emotion,
action, retrospective and inviting. How long did it take to come together, what was the working process, what were you inspired by? The total process took 5 days, starting from the research, potential ideas and sketches followed by the execution in Photoshop and InDesign. I mainly used photographs of the character taken by me combined with some other elements related to the circus, anniversary and celebration.
Blue Marlin Ibiza UAE A clubbing behemoth in the region, strong, clear design is essential to get over Blue Marlin’s talent-heavy line ups, something this artwork did very well. Designer: Hafid Mai, www. hmvisualartist.com Good design is… When you have a minimalist approach. What was your design brief for this artwork? Make an artwork equal to the big event, and to take
inspiration from the artist’s music. How long did it take to come together? It took me 2 days to make it. I sketched the layout and then moved it into my software (Photoshop, Illustrator and InDesign), then I gave 2 or 3 options for approval. I was inspired by abstract videos for BMI Artworks.
Groove on the Grass
Not content with just organizing, booking, running and DJing at his own (excellent) home-grown festival Groove on the Grass, Deian Markov is also the designer on this artwork for Nicolas Jaar. Designer: Deian Markov Good design is‌ Deep, with multidimensional layering, and a focus on mood. What was your design brief for this artwork? Black background with white text only. What was the working process? It took ages to get the concept down, but this specific artwork took 10 minutes. And how did you achieve that? Photoshop & Illustrator. Which other designers/flyers do you admire in the region? 264 Cru (Karak Beats) is the best by far, Analog room from time to time, and the Secret Circle guys are doing a good job.
Analog Room
Alternative, cutting edge and utterly unique, Analog Room’s music and booking policy is fittingly represented in their flyer design which has been turning heads for the past 3 years. Designer: Jana Jokanovic, www.kollektika.com Good design is… Jana: The ability to arouse curiosity in every day life, but also the capacity to simplify complex information. Mehdi (Analog Room): I think first it must be fresh and even be art even if it’s a classic. It needs to have a strong message in different ways. What was your design brief for this artwork? Jana: Think big. What was the working process? Jana: The time involved in the realization doesn’t really matter, it’s just a skill being achieved with experience. The conceptualization of the subject and all the elements and its deconstruction is what
makes the artwork interesting. Music makes you dream. Design is the realization of the subconscious. And how did you achieve that? Jana: All my artworks are collages, which is my passion and the fastest way to reach the unexpected. Depending on the budget, whenever possible I prefer to work with professional Photographers or individuals interested to experiment.
Audio tonic Long renowned for their clarity, consistency and identity, audio tonic’s artwork is distinctive and has evolved over the seasons, much like the club night itself. Designer: Kris Dozign, https://www. facebook.com/dozign Good design is… Creatively entertaining the vision set by the customer, and developing that vision.
release the limited edition collector’s piece.
What was your design brief for this artwork? Stand out! (as always). I wanted to create a series of keep-sake art pieces, you’ll see what I mean at the when we
Which other designers/flyers do you admire in the region? I really like the Superheroes stuff, and Dysfunktion direction. Polar opposites, but both have strong identities.
Together With A monthly gathering of likeminded house and techno fans, Together With boasted strong, simple design with a rotating cast of bold background colours making the advert leap out from the page. Designer: Salah Sadeq Creative Director, Hady Fakhry Designer Andco//ective Dubai and Beirut. Good design is‌ Attractive, expressive, impressive. What was your design brief for this artwork? To create a series of posters for a monthly residency at the Dek on 8 - Media one Hotel. Posters had to be fresh, striking, colorful and aligned with both entities’s visual identity. How long did it take to come together, what was the working process, what were you inspired by? The collaboration for the sake of music and talent is what inspired the use of + sign pattern, as BITM, Techfui and Dek on 8 came together to showcase. A color adaptation was produced for each night to stay cohesive throughout the communication.
Night Vibes Eclectic and imaginative, Night Vibes’ artwork has continually evolved through the seasons, with striking colour schemes and leftfield imagery at the core. And this season’s was no exception. Good design is… The promoter pushing for perfection, and the designer being patient. Bright, distinct colours are always a winner. What was your design brief for this artwork? Think summer, think fresh, geometrical lines, stay vibrant. How long did it take to come together, what was the working process, what were you inspired by? 1,000,000 emails back and forth! Which other designers/flyers do you admire in the region? I love Superheroes, Analog Room and Deep Like. It’s the imagery and consistency that catches my attention, with slight tweaks to emphasize a brand new week.
Look and Listen
Music News GLASTONBURY TO MOVE HOME?
The rumours have been building for a while now, but it looks as if the Glastonbury team are moving house in 2019 and setting up at Longleat, a 9,000 acre stately home in Wiltshire. Festival founder Michael Eavis only owns part of the land the festival is held on, and has been in talks with Longleat, which also houses a safari park and Centre Parc. TECHNO NOW THE BIGGEST SELLING GENRE ON BEATPORT
Techno has now overtaken tech-house as the biggest seller on Beatport, as revealed by the International Music Summit Business Report in Ibiza. Drum and Bass is the biggest growing genre on the site, up to the 6th most popular genre above progressive house and trance. The report also found that the global electronic music industry is now worth $7.1 billion, a 60% rise in just three years.
TECH TALK Traktor Kontrol S8
You might have heard of Stems, the newest way of playing music – if not, we’ll explain quickly. It’s basically your dance music track broken down into 4 elements – the drums, the bassline, a harmony and a lead stem for example. It gives you a lot more freedom when you’re playing your music – you could take the kick from ‘Blue Monday’ and layer it over the bassline from ‘Eat Sleep Rave Repeat.’ Fun, right. The clever people at Traktor have built the Kontrol S8, which is tailor made for playing stems. There are 2 decks (with the option to use 2 more), and 4 sliders per channel to bring in each of the stems. Those stems can then be filtered or assigned an FX, while you can loop, splice, cut and edit on the fly. It’s a little confusing at first – there are pads and knobs all over the console, but once we’d got to grips with the technology, it was easy to see why Carl Cox has adopted this as his DJ set up of choice.
With everything so easily manipulated, and seamlessly synced, it was a lot of fun to chop up the track, to create drama and minibreakdowns, to bring in vocal snippets and to use the FX creatively on each Stem. The possibilities are almost endless – you can turn a soulful house joint into a big room remix by adding a new kick and melody, you can add a dubstep half beat to a rolling techhouser, you can chop and cut the same track so much you’d barely recognize the original. The key is to know your music inside out, and to know the console inside out: it would be very, very easy to lose yourself in a maze of filters and chopped beats, finding yourself in a musical dead end. But used correctly, this is an amazingly powerful tool that is only limited by the number of Stem enabled tracks out there, which is growing by the day.
AED 4,645 from Mediacast, mediacastsys.com/home/
Soundstage BOOGIE BREEZE The INDIE resident band talk us through their R&B/Gospel sound and playing alongside Michael Jackson
My first musical influence was… Michael Jackson and the Jackson 5. Listening to their songs as a child made me realise I wanted to be an entertainer. My sound is best described as… A fusion of Pop, R&B and Gospel. Best piece of advice you’ve received? Be thankful for your gift and don’t take it for granted, it is to be shared with the world. Also, always have a good relationship with the sound and lighting team, as they determine the way you appear to the audience. What’s your musical guilty pleasure? I like to listen to high-energy music before every show, it gets me pumped before my performance. When I make it, the one thing I want on my rider is… A fully equipped trailer with amazing cuisine, I’m a foodie at heart. My musical motto is… Have confidence in everything you do. Do what you love. Do whatever feels right to you creatively, and don’t follow the crowd. Best gig you’ve played? I had the opportunity to be a part of a live Michael Jackson concert in NYC, it was an amazing and magical moment. Best lyrics of all time? Michael Jackson: Keep on where the force don’t stop, don’t stop till you get enough Prince: We’re not gonna let the elevator break us down, oh no! Let’s go crazy
MUSIC THAT MATTERS DARKO DE JAN – WE ARE THE FUTURE
More dynamic, driving, moody tech-house from the Burj Al Arab resident DJ, out soon on Lowbit Records.
SCOTT FORSHAW & GREG STAINER – PRISM
The Hollaphonic production duo sign this classic slice of deep, slightly jackin’ house to Toolroom Records for their Ibiza 2016 Compilation. Big! soundcloud.com/scottforshawofficial/ scott-forshaw-greg-stainer-prism-toolroomrecords
SHAUN WARNER – THE TRINITY
One of the stand out tracks from the second Ma’ana compilation, The Trinity is a pulverizing, emotional slice of house that includes a mystical Indian chant. soundcloud.com/shaunwarner/shaunwarner-the-trinity-original-mixout-now
Send tracks/edits/remixes to: andy@infusion.ae
soundcloud.com/darko-de-jan/sets/we-arethe-future-ep
JULIA POLY – I KNOW
Bouncy, energetic commercial house tune with a classic piano riff, a rock solid kick and more melody than you could shake a glow-stick at. soundcloud.com/dj-julia-poly/julia-poly-iknow-original-mix
EJAZ – TRANSISTIONS
A huge step up for the Pacha resident DJ, as Ejaz was asked to drop a guest mix for John Digweed’s Transitions Radio Show. The result is a building, restless techno mix that includes several tracks from UAE producer Subandrio. mixcloud.com/globaldjsets/john-digweedtransitions-610-guest-ejaz-06-may-2016/ KAYTEK – JUNE PODCAST
Eden’s resident DJ turns in a 75 minute minimal mix that starts slow and builds to a teasing, acid-flecked finish – nicely done. https://soundcloud.com/kay-tek/kaytekjune-podcast-2016-svnvn
HOLLAPHONIC – TURN THE LIGHTS DOWN (ZOH REMIX)
Hollaphonic stay true to their UAE roots as DXB remixer ZOH turns in this deep, slightly tropical interpretation that we’re liking a lot. https://soundcloud.com/zohsound/ ttldzohremix
DJ BOOTH: DARRYL REES
The McGettigans Abu Dhabi DJ talks us through his table tennis skills and his guilty pleasure Justin Bieber… One thing you might not know about me is... I was South Wales’ regional table tennis champion when I was 18. (Wales is small). My worst ever job was… Working in a Butchers on a Saturday at the age of 16. Don’t miss that one bit. DJing is much like... A rollercoaster ride, you start off at the bottom slowly take the
crowd up and up then boom, the drop, at this point some people are screaming going wild wanting more and some people just can’t handle it. Dubai’s clubbing scene is... Probably the best clubbing scene in the world. It goes off all year round not just in the summer time, and there’s so many places to choose from such as beach parties, pool parties, clubs and bars. I’m really proud of... Packing my stuff 4 years ago and jumping on that plane to DJ in the UAE, best decision I’ve ever made! What track could you drop in every set? CoronaRhythm of the night (Blonde remix). It’s a song that everyone knows and the drop is pretty awesome. I can’t live without... Music, maybe for a day when you’ve been on the decks all week but definitely not forever. My biggest DJ achievement to date is... DJing at the Holi Festival of colours Dubai in front on thousands of people. What is your guiltiest pleasure? Justin Bieber. If you could DJ in any decade which would it be... The 90s. If I could go back-to-back with any other DJ it would be... Carl cox, his music skills are immense and he just seems like such a down to earth guy. I’m not a politician but… I think the Whitehouse should be turned into one massive club. soundcloud.com/dj-daz-1990
Looking Closer
Weird News BEAR NECESSITIES Your eyes are not deceiving you – that is a bear drinking tea from some fine china. Stepan is a 23 year old, 21 stone bear who lives with his Russian parents, feeding him up to 25kg of fish, vegetables and eggs on a daily basis. Adopted when he was just 3 months old, he’s now a part of the family and loves nothing more than sitting back (on the specially re-inforced sofa) watching a game of football (just don’t tell him Russia have been knocked out already).
THE SHORT STRAW
You know that mate who always takes bets and dares too far? Yeah, well, this is how he’s going to end up. 74 year old Har Parkash Rishi has had all of his teeth removed so he can fit nearly 500 straws and more than 50 burning candles in his mouth. Other records he currently holds are downing a bottle of ketchup in less than 40 seconds, having the most number of flags tattooed on his body (we didn’t know that was actually a thing) and the longest delivery pizza ride (10,286 miles from Dehli to California). You win, Har, you win.
THE SPIN JULY 2016
PAGE 217
ISSUE 42
BREXIT BOOST FOR DUBAI’S CLUB SCENE
Dubai’s clubs and promoters got an unexpected boost recently when Britain’s exit out of the European Union sent the pound plummeting, meaning DJ fees and flights got a lot more affordable. UAE promoter Mustafa Dollar said: ‘The pound has dropped so much I can now book Jamie Jones and Pete Tong for Business Class flights for just AED95 and 50 fils.’ He continued saying that he could pass the drastic price savings onto the average clubber, but that ‘he’s got his own 2 month long Ibiza holiday’ to pay for, he would be keeping the costs artificially in the UAE. Outgoing Prime Minister David Cameron meanwhile has announced that he’s going to drop beats and not bombs and become a celebrity DJ, with the Swine Time tour coming to a town near you soon. *These stories are not true, this is not a real newspaper. This is a parody/fiction/satire/joke. The Spin is not intended, in any way whatsoever, to be taken as factual.
Looking Closer
JUST FOR
NIKE AIR MAX 90
Every self respecting sneaker head owns a pair (or seven) of Nike Air Max, but we’re scrambling to add these Air Max 90s to our collection. The blue/green/white colour way screams summer, while the mesh upper with overlays makes them light and breathable. The tongue, Swoosh and air pocket guard are all done in electric green with a white sole and pink flashes throughout. $95, girls sizes only
7 NETFLIX SHOWS YOU HAVE TO BINGEWATCH THIS SUMMER
Netflix is here – yay. And summer is here which means box set nirvana. Stephen Day and Andy Buchan get square eyes picking the 7 series you need to watch this summer
RICK & MORTY With The Simpsons on borrowed time, Family Guy recycling jokes and the nu-breed of animated comedies like Bojack Horseman floundering, there’s room in the market for an adult cartoon. Alongside the ever excellent Archer (which is also on Netflix) is Rick & Morty, a science fiction comedy that follows granddad scientist Rick and his easily influenced grandson Morty, who split their time between family dinners and interdimensional battles, obviously. It’s zany, gross-out, wacky and very, very silly – but also satirical, surreal and wholly original. Oh, and that resemblance to Back To The Future? It actually started life as an animated parody of Marty McFly and Doc Brown, before being developed into 2 full seasons (with a 3rd to come at the end of this year).
NARCOS What do you get when you combine grade A narcotics, a star cast, a giant ego propelled by said class A narcotics and a South American country in a constant state of flux? Narcos tells the truelife story of Medellin cartel head honcho Pablo Escobar (played by the excellent Wagner Moura) as the CIA try to capture – and ultimately – kill him. Violent, politically-charged, filled with bad 80s fashion and interspersed with actual news footage from the period, each episode flies past in a blur of Spanish insults, gruesome deaths, illicit lines and laugh out loud stupidity from the authorities. Season 2 has been commissioned and is due out at the start of next year, giving you plenty of time to play catch up.
THE UNBREAKABLE KIMMY SCHMIDT If you liked 30 Rock – and if you didn’t, we can no longer be friends – then you’ll love the wacky, day-glo humour of the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Kimmy, played by Ellie Kemper from the American version of The Office, adjusts to life in New York after being rescued from a doomsday cult. Written by Tina Fey and Robert Carlock (both behind 30 Rock), its specialities are busting open social taboos, slapstick comedy and characters so brilliantly 2 dimensional they’d give Tom and Jerry a run for their money. Laughs come freely and regularly in this wonderfully weird – yet endearingly simple – sitcom.
BLOODLINES
The Rayburns are hard-working pillars of their Florida Keys community, but their past contains many secrets that they hope remain buried. The tight-knit family’s formerly harmonious relationship deteriorates and good people are forced to consider doing very bad things in this new drama from the creator behind Damages. Animal Kingdoms’ Ben Mendelsohn shines as the black sheep brother, so if you like your drama gritty, dirty and very very dark then this is for you. Season 2 has just arrived so you have plenty to be catching up on.
LADY DYNAMITE
If you enjoy your comedy a little/a lot off centre, then this might just be for you. Stand up comedian Maria Bamford (Pam Brady) moves back to L.A after spending six months away in recovery attempting to build up her life from scratch with the help of her agent Bruce BenBacharach. It’s a crazy ride of fantasy that occasionally takes huge leaps of faith that the viewer will go along as well. It’s created by Pam Brady & Mitch Hurwitz of Arrested Development fame: if you could keep up with that, then this might be right up your street.
MAKING A MURDERER You haven’t seen this? What? Where have you been, as this is possibly the most talked about Netflix show in the last 12 months. This compelling documentary tells the story of Steve Avery, a man who after serving 18 years for attempted murder is exonerated and then re-arrested 2 years later for the murder another local woman. It’s edge of your seat stuff, you will find yourself screaming at the T.V. My only suggestion is to clear your day, as you will be back to backing this 10 part masterpiece of modern day television. It’s like Netflix Pringles, one you pop you wont be able to stop.
CHEF’S TABLE David Gelb made one of my favourite food documentaries ever, in Jiro Dreams of Sushi (track it down now), and he’s now produced an exceptional series looking at the lives and kitchens of some of the world’s most renowned chefs. Each episode focuses on just one chef. But not only their food, but more importantly their passion, their ethos and their drive to get where they are today. It’s an exceptional show, it’s food porn taken up to 11 and I challenge you to find a better-looking food show anywhere else on the planet.
Looking Closer
Eat Sleep Rave Repeat Brunswick Sports Club
Andy Buchan puts Tom and Serg’s first licensed restaurant to the hamburger and beer test
Looking Closer First, the good news. The Brunswick Sports Club offer a low carb, low sugar beer called The Pure Blonde that is very drinkable. Which is what you’ll need as working your way through the 13 burgers on the menu will take its toll on your waistline very quickly. The pub in the Sheraton Hotel on the edge of Mall of the Emirates is the first licensed outlet from the Tom and Serg team, and is a laid-back sports bar with over 7 big screens dotted around the two rooms. And it’s important that they have 2 rooms – the main space is a no-smoking area, with a large side-room dedicated for smokers, an excellent move. The menu is burger dominated, with each burger coming with a suggested beer pairing, while there are also 4 hot dogs on the menu. We opted for the Burger Blat (aged cheddar, avocado and bacon – very, very fresh and clean tasting) and the outstanding Mac Daddy: a molten mass of beef brisket and BBQ sauce with creamy Macaroni & Cheese that oozed over the bun like a golden lava flow. It was decadent, delicious and is actually making us dribble over the keyboard just thinking about it again.
The burgers are all very well priced, starting from AED65 but you need to order fries on the side – we opted for the egg, Hollandaise, Pecorino and truffle fries, which were outrageously good at AED35. Desert was French toast with fresh and freeze-dried strawberries, ice cream and Persian candy floss. The toast was soft and pillowy, with a crunchy, super-sweet cinnamon coating, while the candy floss was an inspired, sticky and velvety touch. Musically, the bar follows a very cool indie/alternative playlist – we heard Blur, Alabama Shakes and The War On Drugs on the stereo during our visit, while they’ve teamed up with Mo City for a series of semi-regular Friday parties. Well priced, with an inspired menu (the Doctor Zoidberg tempura soft shell crab with wasabi mayo and green mango slaw is our next burger to try), excellent service and some unique to Dubai beers and cocktails, the Brunswick is one of the best new additions to the pub and bar scene in recent years.
The Brunswick, Level 2, The Sheraton Hotel, Mall of the Emirates brunswicksc.com/
Flog It The Monkey, being the important meeja personality that I am, is accustomed to getting sent free stuff from people who want me to write nice things about them. This is funny as firstly, I never write nice stuff, and secondly what is a Monkey going to do with a life time’s supply of Ravis, the best, most tastiest restaurant in the whole of the Middle East. So I was flabbegastered when I saw a local radio show post a video where they boasted of all the free stuff they’d been sent. Now, I know Dubai isn’t the pinnacle of journalism, or even anywhere close actually, but to boast about the free stuff they get for mentioning their product on radio is about as shameless as it gets. You’ll find me down Ravis consoling my self with a Butter Chicken…
Monkey Out... The Angry Monkeys’ views are his own, and don’t necessarily reflect the views of Infusion Magazine.
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