The importance of sticking with your gut: an ode to my dance experience

Julia Leitner ’23 Assistant Business Director

Seventh grade was the first time that I thought about quitting dance. It was bat mitzvah season, the height of friend group drama and a time when I thought going ice skating at Longshore might be the most important thing I could possibly do. My friends all had schedules filled with social events, and I always had… dance. On many occasions I questioned whether the commitment that dance required was really worth it.

My entire life has been devoted to dance. I put in 25 hours or more each week in the studio, spent countless weekends trapped in dark convention centers all over the tristate area performing at competitions and flew cross country for auditions. Dance is, at my core, a vehicle for me to express my feelings and tell my story and

I can see where they are coming from. Throughout my high school experience, I had to make many sacrifices in order to dance. Basketball games, sleepovers, concerts and trips are a short list of things I often missed. I was quickly labeled as the friend, sibling, daughter who was simply “never there.” This used to upset me A LOT. I often felt like I was missing out on all that high school had to offer.

Freshman year, however, was the last time I thought about quitting dance. Although it may have taken an entire pandemic and lockdown filled with hours of Zoom dance in my basement and months away from the physical studio to show me how much dance meant to me, my time differed from those around me. I no longer secretly believed that maybe they were right. I recognized that I could never accept my life without my dance family, and I could not be happy without the creative outlet and channel to express who I am and who I want to become. The movements we create and the risks we take keep me going each day. Dance is what I love and what I realized I never want to stop doing. This winter, I was fortunate enough to be accepted into two of my top college dance programs. Again, the doubt crept in. When telling people about my accomplishments, I often found myself un- ment, or if it is because there is little recognition for dance as compared to other sports, but for whatever reason, I was feeling undeserving of everything that I worked so hard for and earned. It wasn't until a little later that I realized how deserving I really was. Not everybody’s high school experience is filled with 25 hours of dance a week, countless missed events and the need to keep grades up despite having to study around dance. It has taken time but I have come to accept that the path I chose is not something to feel guilty about. Dance was the only path for me and one that I now embrace as it has led to a future doing what I love most. There was a reason why I didn't quit dance in seventh grade. Dance is what I am meant to be doing. Whether it be at The Spot in Norwalk or at the University of Texas in Austin, dancing is where I flourish and find inner peace. For any