A few things I learned at Staples High School

Anna Diorio’23 Broadcast Director

Your camera is the only one zoomed in That time you said something stupid or feared the forehead acne wouldn't just go away—it might be the only thing you can think about or fixate on, but for everyone else, it is out of focus. No one thinks about it as much as you do. But looking back, I can’t remember a single outfit worn by someone else. I've never come home and said to my mom, “So and so’s acne was looking worse than yesterday.” And neither has anyone else. Because like you, everyone else has their own things they’re zooming in on. So please, don’t worry about what everyone else thinks.

“Identity crisis is not a joke, Jim. Millions of high schoolers suffer every year”

Most high schoolers will, at one or many points in their lives find themselves struggling to decide who they want to be. Do I want to be known as the funny one? The pretty and popular one? The Ivy-bound one? I’ve considered being every one of these personas and many others. My piece of advice—when in doubt, be the kind one. Yes, no matter what, we should be kind because it’s important and it increases the probability of double rainbows appearing. But for this particular purpose, being known as “the nice person” is what you should default to if you are ever struggling to be some other aspect of yourself. If you’re trying to come off as cool or confident, it might not always translate well, especially if you don’t feel the same on the inside. So be nice if not something else. To be clear, don’t fake it or pretend. Be genuine. Then once you’re comfortable, you can be the “nice and something else” person.

If at first they are a b*tch, go, go away

When I was a freshman, there was this girl who was in a couple of classes with me. We’d talk pretty often and walk down the hallways together sometimes. I was really excited about the prospect of us maybe becoming friends (I was shy then and had trouble making friends). But this girl was super inconsistent in how she acted. She’d be nice to me one day and standoffish and cold the next day—just playing with my poor little ninth-grader heart. It was frustrating to not know which side of her I’d get and if it was somehow something I was doing to flip the switch.

I eventually stopped trying to make friends with her. She wasn’t treating me the way I deserved to be treated. If someone isn’t at the very least consistently showing you respect, they aren’t worth your time or energy. It isn’t hard to be nice to people. So if a person is friendly to you only half the time, it’s a sign of their own insecurities. Your feelings are not meant to be tossed around.

In defense of lone wolves. . .

Being alone does not mean you are lonely. In ninth grade, when my friend group was small and my anxiety prevented me from expanding that circle, some days I wouldn’t have any friends in my lunch wave. I’d sit alone outside the auditorium or in a couch corner and eat my lunch because sitting down at a table with one familiar face made me feel out of place.

Originally I was embarrassed because I looked like the girl who didn’t have any friends and always ate lunch alone. But it’s okay to spend time with yourself. You don’t have to always be social. Knowing how to be comfortable with being yourself is a sign of strength.

If you’re alone and you feel like you’re missing out on something or that being alone makes you look lonely, remind yourself of the fact that you have a choice. You have friends you can spend time with or places you could be, and they’ll be there when you feel like being social. But it's also okay if you feel like spending time in bed watching TV or baking cookies.