#unsocial

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Last summer, some of our staff agreed to give up our biggest technology vices for a story called #disconnect. For most of us it ended up being things like email, iPhones and TVs. But the writers who enjoyed the assignment and learned the most all gave up something related to social media. So this year we decided why not take it up a notch and see if anybody was willing to give up social media completely. July 31, 2014

Of course, not everybody who participated last year got on board. Saying goodbye to Facebook all together isn’t nearly as easy as just saying you won’t read it on your phone after all. But there were seven Inweekly staffers willing to sign up for a thirty day social media blackout. We decided to call it #unsocial. The rules for #unsocial were simple—no social media of any kind for one

month. None, not even one tweet. We banned every platform—even those that we don’t use too often like Vine, just to be safe. Some of us suspended our accounts, some of us just deleted the apps from our smartphones. We tried to tell people we’d be gone without telling them why, just incase anybody wanted to invite us to their Scentsy party or tag us in a photo from middle school while we were away. We

didn’t want all of our “friends” thinking we were mad at them. So what does modern life look like without likes, friend requests and #throwbackthursday? Some of us cheated too early to even find out and some of us liked it so much we vowed to never go back. Here’s what our individual months being #unsocial looked like.

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Write me a letter by Ashley McLain

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aybe a little too giddy over #unsocial, I excitedly signed off of all social media around 8 p.m. the night before the challenge started. By 8:15 p.m., I was already questioning if I had made a major mistake agreeing to participate. I stared at my phone, no notifications, nothing to flip through, nothing to like. “What’s an iPhone even good for without Instagram, Twitter and Facebook?” I texted a friend. Day one I left my phone in my bag the whole day and I began to not even think about what I might be missing. By day two any hesitations I initially felt were gone, and I was completely sold on a life without social media. While I was social media detoxing, I would love to say that I was wildly productive and completed all the projects I’m always putting off, but that just wasn't the case. What I did experience, however, was much better. In the midst of my social media shutout, I found a weird form of freedom. Yes, I know it sounds gag-worthy, but hear me out: The ability to live without worrying about a status update, check-in or perfectly angled Instagram photo capturing a moment that really wasn't all the cool to begin with felt really good. I ditched the FOMO, stopped comparing myself to others, and stopped feeling guilt for not liking or commenting on a friend's latest life update. It was exciting to get texts, calls and emails from friends who were actually

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making an effort to stay in touch rather than just flipping through my latest posts. If people wanted to get in touch with me, they did. And it completely cut out all the rants about tourist traffic, whining about jobs and 5,000 nearly identical photos of Fourth of July fireworks. Turning off the noise meant everyone in my life instantly became more interesting. I began asking people how their day was out of genuine interest rather than just nodding while mentally predicting their response based on the status updates I’d seen. I spent more time hanging out with friends and family members and doing things I enjoy than I ever did with social media. And that whole thing about how you’ll get better sleep if you’re not playing with your phone before bed? Yeah, it’s totally true. I would be lying if I didn’t say there were a few drawbacks. I wanted so badly to post a triumphant status update when I passed my thesis defense in Gainesville, or maybe an Instagram of me face punching the bull gator statue. Traveling and finding new places to try became a little more difficult without Foursquare, which I hear isn’t even Foursquare anymore. Finding out Ryan Gosling is now a soon-to-be papa a couple days after the rest of the world knew was pretty lame too. But, really none of these things were important enough to make me want to reconnect. Being anti-social media became such an engrained behavior that when it came time to turn it all back on I found myself hating the idea–what if the FOMO came back? Did I really want to bring back in all the annoyance? At the demanding of my friends I turned on Instagram briefly for 5 minutes and decided I really wasn't all that into it anymore. I've since decided to keep it on so I can post occasional pictures that I feel like sharing, but mostly so my friends will quit asking, "Did you see that pic I tagged you in on IG?" We’ve become so involved in one another’s lives that taking a step back—even for just a month—can really put real life versus social media life into perspective. Because of this, I intend to stay radio silent a little while longer. Yes, I’m one of “those” people now. Write me a letter.

How did this guy get anything else done? by Jason Leger

I

am a creature of habit. I have been one for as long as I can remember. This actually seems to tie into some form of mild OCD for me. So before I began #unsocial, I had a pattern to social media. First thing in the morning, I would post a usually strategically chosen song of the day on Facebook. There was always a method. The song may have correlated to something—a holiday, an album release, or simply my mood. Later in the day, I would post a link to this song with its most striking lyrics. After that, I had some options. I’m undertaking a public “Year of Gratitude” experiment, following last year’s experiment on perspective. Publicly, this is reduced to snippets of things I’m thinking about, words from what I’m reading at the moment, or the occasional song lyric, all branded with “2014, the year of gratitude.” Then, usually a YouTube video would come while doing #homework, going to the #gym, going to #bed, or getting ready for the #wknd, that would express whatever is transpiring. This video is also

interchangeable with an article or picture with some expression of how “Everyone else doesn’t get it, but I don’t get it either, but I’m closer than them,” which more often than not would end up making me irritated or sick of myself, and I would end up taking it down. Of course, all of this is interspersed with Instagram pictures of whatever I’m listening to at the moment or my sweet dog or a hilarious idea Tweeted out because it isn’t quite funny enough for Facebook. I know what you’re thinking, “How did this guy get anything else done during the day?” Honestly, sometimes I didn’t. My work, my writing, my homework, the gym, my family, my friends—they would all have to sit and wait, as I got lost in staring at pictures and articles and status updates for extended periods of time. I felt the challenge was going to be tough, but I knew I needed a change. The first few days were simple. Being the creature of habit that I am, if I took a picture of something, I sent it to someone and had a laugh with them. I did much more interacting, working, writing and of course, listening to music. I became much more productive during my day. So much so that I was able to take on other people’s work as well and do it all efficiently. I hardly thought about what my friends were posting on Facebook or Instagram. Honestly, I began to dread the end of the challenge. I dreaded looking at opinions I disagreed with. I dreaded looking at changing relationship statuses. I dreaded seeing people openly bitching about other people. I dreaded looking at cat pictures. I simply didn’t want it anymore. I had seen the other side, and I didn’t want to go back. So when the 30 days ended, I logged in. The first thing I saw on Facebook was a gif of cats bobbing their heads to music. I watched the full rotation three times, then logged back out. It took me another day to log back in. I have started posting songs of the day again because I enjoy that. But I posted something unrelated to music last week for the first time, and I felt gross. I’m going to utilize that feeling. I don’t want to be who I was 30 days ago. I have a new perspective, and I’m extremely grateful. If you feel addicted to social media, take my advice: it’s easier to break away than you may think. Just cut it off. The op-ed piece isn’t that important. The Thought Catalog article isn’t that important. The cat video is seriously not that important. inweekly.net


It’s not you, it’s me by Joani Delezen

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onfession: I came up with #unsocial, and I did so for pretty selfish reasons. I really needed a mental break, but I wasn’t sure I could do it, at least not alone. I wanted some company. So I created the assignment and got some writers on board. Oh, the joys of being the boss.

44% of smartphone owners sleep with their phone. (International Data Corporation)

44%

July 31, 2014

My reasons for wanting to take a social media break were pretty typical—too much noise, not enough productivity, being annoyed by my “friends” (you know, the ones who post way too often and comment on every freakin’ thing you post), missing out on moments because I was too busy documenting them… Like I said, typical. So I started off my #unsocial month with high expectations (I’m going to read like 10 books!) and a few accountability partners just a text away. Sure, I was going to miss my Instagram feed (that’s where I get my daily dose of pretty from artists and bloggers I’m fans of), but taking a breather from Facebook and Twitter was going to be great. And it was. Sure, I missed some things like news of breakups, engagements and a celebrity death or two. But all of that seemed small and insignificant in comparison to the stuff I was doing with my new found free time like reading, decluttering my entire house (even under the bed) and having coffee with friends I hadn’t seen in way too long. I learned that I fall asleep much quicker when reading an actual book

than reading on Facebook. I guess all that stuff about artificial light affecting your sleep cycle is true after all. I also made it a point to send happy birthday texts during the month. Surprisingly they take just as long to create as happy birthday posts, but are received much better. Pretty much everyone I sent one to responded immediately (out of shock probably, thinking ‘why isn’t she posting to my wall?’). They also got me some personal invites to a few birthday parties and dinners that I actually went to. Yup, being #unsocial made me more social—go figure. But it wasn’t the golden ticket to the perfectly productive, put together life I dreamed it would be. You see, even without social media, I was still me. I still bought cookbooks but didn’t actually cook. I still started things and didn’t finish them. I still got distracted way too easily. I still wasted time. Turning off the noise didn’t fix all my problems, it just made them much easier to spot. I’m really good at keeping myself busy, but not having much to show for it. That’s what I need to work on. And as much as I painted it as my personal time-sucking villain, it turns out social media isn’t my only vice. But it’s crazy how hard it is to find out basic things what time a concert starts or if my high school boyfriend is married without it. So I’m going to keep my accounts for those types of things, but I’m not going to get sucked back into reading my newsfeed every morning or responding to every pointless thing I’m tagged in. I just can’t, or I know I’ll never start crossing things of my to-do list like starting a blog or walking my puppy everyday. So if you’re my “friend” please consider this my “we’re breaking up” post (unless you want to find me in the real world of course). Just remember, it’s not you, it’s me.

16% 16% of people under 25 rely on Twitter for their morning news. (Spotlight Communications)

DEBATING A DETOX? Chances are if you’re reading this issue and thinking to yourself, ‘Maybe I should try a social media detox too,’ you probably need one. And if you aren’t willing to admit it, you probably really need to. But you don’t have to take our word for it. Here are some tell-tale signs you could use a little moderation when it comes to social media: • You have “friends” you’ve never actually met • You’ve ever posted any of the following: a car selfie, a shirtless selfie, an “I woke up like this” selfie, an airplane selfie… • People call you by your

Instagram or Twitter handle offline • You’ve gotten in trouble on a plane for not “powering down” • You’ve paid for a photo editing app because those Instagram filters just weren’t cutting it • You were bummed when people stopped using Foursquare and your “mayor” status didn’t mean as much • You have a Vine account and actually use it

• Same with Google+ • If you’ve ever posted five or more status updates within an hour (that’s what Twitter is for, silly) • If getting retweeted or liked has ever made your day (or at least made you brag a bit) • You’ve stalked an ex via their FB page or Instagram feed at least once this month • You get jealous when people take better photos or post funnier Tweets than you If you’re guilty of three or more of these, you might want to think about unplugging, at least a little bit. For tips and realistic strategies on how to do just that, turn to page 15.

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85% I’m a bit of a hoarder by Hana Frenette

85 percent of women are annoyed by their friends on Facebook. (Web Pro News)

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hen I first agreed to sign off social media for a month, my initial concerns were few and fairly trivial. I thought ‘what if something really crazy happens in the next month, like a truly monumental law is passed or a really good cat meme surfaces?’ Then I remembered that I wasn’t banned from reading the news, just obtain-

ing it from social media. It only took me a day to realize how much I rely on Facebook as a place to cultivate information about local and world events. 24 hours into #unsocial, not a real newspaper in sight, I found myself walking around feeling totally disconnected. What’s going on? What relevant yet mundane topic is The Onion making fun of today? What kind of Buzzfeed quiz about the ‘90s would I be taking right now? What’s happening in the Ukraine? I know nothing. Nothing. After a moment of reflection and the realization that I could still access any and all news sites, I chose to focus my concerns on the purely social interaction I would be lacking for the next 30 days. Would I miss posting photos on Instagram? Yes. I take a lot of pictures and it’s probably my favorite social media platform. Could I still take pictures and show them to people? Sure, just not all at once to an entire spectrum of friends, family, strangers and acquaintances. Then there’s Twitter. Something I never got into and almost never use. A better challenge there might be making me use Twitter for 30 days. And of course Facebook. I use Facebook a little less than Instagram, but I still troll it frequently and aimlessly at times. In the grocery store line. Waiting for a coffee to be made. Sitting on the couch with a friend. I do like that I can reach out to hundreds of people at once with a question about where the best french fries in town are or to promote a yard sale or something, but the actual amount of interacting has lessened a bit in recent years. Instead I find myself sifting through the drudge of posts that offer a plethora of the good, the bad and the melodramatic. One of my best friends says that when she checks the birthday section of Face-

book, and sees someone she doesn’t really care about wishing a happy birthday to, she unfriends them right then. On their birthday. She says it’s her present to them, to rid them of her indifference on their special day. I think it’s actually a very thoughtful gift. It got me thinking about how much stuff we all take in every day on social media that we feel indifferent to. What my old roommate had for breakfast or where someone I sat next to in high school just moved. Maybe it would do us all a little good to unfollow and unfriend a few, not out of spite or annoyance but the sheer recognition that we don’t need to keep every person, place or thing around that was once significant in our life. Will I follow through with that? Probably not, but it at least crossed my mind. I’m a bit of a hoarder and despite the fact that social connections aren’t tangible, I can see myself holding on to a Facebook friend of a friend the same way I would a birthday card from five years ago. Toward the end of this hiatus from social media, I felt much less concerned with what other people were doing or what I might be missing out on. I didn’t start half my conversations with a reference to something someone posted or shared. I also realized how often I reach for the phone out of habit, and would end up accidentally tapping the apps that were now in place of the ones I had deleted. I must have opened the weather app instead of Instagram about 50 times. It was decidedly much less interesting, but I can’t say I wasn’t informed. I do think the sites that allow us to share parts of our lives are great and have allowed us to communicate easier and much more frequently than ever before, but it is nice to step back from it all for a second and mentally de-clutter. The break was pleasant enough but when it was time to return, I’ll happily admit I couldn’t wait to send all kinds of links, post pictures and just generally lurk a little.

OH NO, WE DIDN'T Gym selfies. RIP status updates for celebrities you aren’t even fans of. #sorrynotsorry. Everybody is guilty of committing a social media faux pas from time to time—including us. In fact, acknowledging how annoying we can sometimes be was a large part of what made us want to take on this challenge. So instead of a laundry list of our social media pet peeves, we’ve all agreed to confess our guiltiest moments. It’s ok to judge us for these, because we totally judge you every time you Instagram your lunch. 212 1

JOANI: I actually shared a

BuzzFeed quiz called “Which Beyoncé Are You” on Facebook. Don’t get me wrong, I am more than ok when people share stuff like that with me. I mean, what else is the internet good for besides obsessing over Queen B? I just want to be too busy to find it. And just in case you’re wondering which Beyoncé I got (which I’m sure you are) it was “I Need A Solider”—which I’m not sure I agree with. I always thought I was more of a “Grown Woman.”

JASON: I have a tendency to

passive aggressively post song lyrics or novel quotes to say things for me. Example: “If I stay here, trouble will find me…” Also, I'm 16.

ASHLEY:

I definitely post way too many pictures of my pup, Lucy, but c'mon she's just so darn cute!

ED: After a recent break-up, I

posted several versions of "I Can't Make You Love Me," over a two week period. I know, eww. They don’t call me Emo Ed for nothing (and by “they” I mean Joani—she’s mean sometimes).

SAMANTHA: I don’t even remem-

ber the last time my profile photo was actually of me. It’s always my kids, sometimes me with my kids, but mostly just my kids. Sorry if you’ve ever looked for me and couldn’t find me.

the one time I lived abroad, even though it was over two years ago. Yeah… I realize no one cares.

HANA:

It’s a tie between cat spam (they’re the closest thing I have to kids, so it’s ok) and dressing room selfies.

ALEXA:

All I post are pictures of cats. My cats, stray cats, photos of cats I find on the Internet. Or old photos of inweekly.net


I’m a cheater By Edwin Banacia

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he assignment? Unplug from social media for a month and document the journey. Four weeks. Sounds easy, right? I failed miserably. This grand project started on June 13th. By the next day, I had already cheated.

My timeline (pun intended): June 14—Took a picture with two beautiful women at Seville Quarter. In my inebriated condition, I must have felt compelled to share this experience with my fellas, so I pushed the photo to Instagram and Facebook. June 16—The Miami Heat lose the NBA Finals. Why didst thou tempt me so? June 17—What Game of Thrones name would I have? You read that correctly—I cheated on my editorial assignment because I was tempted by an online quiz. At this point, I really am starting to question my commitment. I resolve to do better. At the least, maybe I can add a few days at the end. June 18 —I meet a wonderful woman at the Fish House on Ladies Night. Of course, instead of my phone number, she wants to “friend me” on Facebook. And since beautiful women are my kryptonite, I break my resolve and sign on to accept. But if you only knew the pressure my mother puts on me to make her a grandchild, you’d take some pity on me. July 31, 2014

June 19—I had completely given up. I started changing my profile picture, posting travel adventures on Instagram and I even started a Twitter account, although I justified the Twitter account by telling myself, “It’s work related.” I could give you countless examples from my newsfeed, but it would only serve to reiterate the fact that this time around, I just couldn’t unplug. This should have been an opportunity to escape from the bombardment of distractions that have become commonplace in this new world. At every turn, something is interrupting me from my work, my innermost personal thoughts and even my physical space. I probably could have used 30 days to break the chains of this torture we have not only learned to accept but also acclimated ourselves to yearn for. I’m an addict. I’m the Patty Hearst of hostages and my relationship to social media is the strongest form of the Stockholm syndrome, the condition where hostages feel empathy and care for their captors. I believe that my captor is an omnipotent, caring protector. But really my relationship with social media is quite terrifying. I am a stimulation addict. And this is why I couldn’t unplug. We feel that we have to compete with our friends. How many times have you looked at your newsfeed and said, “There’s no way their lives are this fascinating.” The people that post about their real lives and struggles are crazy, bi-polar or flawed. So we don’t post that stuff. We pose at just the right angle, we brag about our adventures, we take selfies at the gym and we’re all wealthy with incredibly fascinating lives. But that’s not the complete picture. That’s really not who we are at all. We’ve all become narcissists addicted to our own movie plot and we can’t stop. The train is moving too fast now. Maybe all we can do is admit the truth to ourselves. So here’s mine: Hi, my name is Edwin, and I’m an addict.

I don't take selfies by Alexa Reed

‘O

h, the vanity!’ That was my first thought after signing back on to social media after taking a 30-day sabbatical. OK, technically is was 32 days–I forgot when the challenge ended and kept going for a couple extra days, which speaks for itself about how accustomed I became to not having a social media presence. I didn’t think the challenge would be that difficult going into it. After all, I am much more of a spectator than participant in regard to social media. I don't like to share too much personal information, I don't take selfies and I learned a long time ago that the Internet is not the best place to engage in discussions about anything of importance. But out of habit and comfort, I always found myself refreshing my Instagram and Facebook feeds. But at first it was challenging to break my social media habit. How was I going to waste time on my 15-minute break or procrastinate when I have deadline? Well, the Internet is a big place, so it wasn’t hard. I filled my time reading the news more, getting lost in rabbit holes I found interesting or devouring the New Yorker archive that was made free for the summer. I realized within the first week how much people truly rely on Facebook for communication. When I showed up to my weekly trivia night, I was questioned multiple times about why I deleted Facebook

and how these people would contact me. 'Um, the old fashioned way,' I told them. ‘Call me.’ I also became more aware of how many conversations start with the phrase, ‘Did you see [insert photo/post/news/ here] on Facebook?’ But what I struggled with most during #unsocial was not having social media during the World Cup. I wanted to know the reaction of my German friends, I wanted to see where everyone was gathering to watch the matches. It killed me not having this information at my fingertips like I normally would. I also missed posts from friends who got married, traveled to Thailand, had babies and got engaged. Missing these events made me feel a bit isolated, even though I wasn’t actively participating in them. So, I signed back on after 32 days. I was bombarded with my least favorite things: photos of people's faces just like the other 50 that have been posted (we get it, you’re attractive). Status updates telling me of whatever side of the Israel/Palestine conflict someone's one (you’re not going to change anyone’s opinion). People asking for prayers (God totally checks Facebook). And I guess these things serve a purpose, whether it’s a way to connect, reach out or feel validated—I just don’t understand it. I was also hit with the realization of all the “friends” I forgot existed. The thought of them didn't even cross my mind when they weren't popping up in my news feed regularly. I felt bad, even guilty. But maybe this experiment showed me who I really need to consider as an actual friend. On the other hand, it helped to strengthen relationships with those I’m close to. My conversations seemed to be more engaging, surprising, personal and real. Most importantly and surprisingly, getting off of social media made me like people more. I wasn’t annoyed by online personas that people carefully seem to craft that sometimes aren’t anything like their actual personalities. There was less complaining. I stopped comparing myself as much to my peers, who seem to have it all figured out (at least on their profiles). It was refreshing. Of course, I resurrected my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram accounts. But I haven’t posted anything or put the apps back on my phone. I check these sites more purposefully now instead of relying on them to pass the time. I will probably always have a social media presence, but I just vow to use it more responsibly. 13


63% 63% of smartphone owners keep their phone with them for all but an hour of their waking day.

It started to feel like a vacation

(International Data Corporation)

by Samantha Crooke

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his is embarrassing to admit as a parent, but my one-year-old daughter’s favorite thing to steal and play with is my cell phone. Given that she is at the stage where she likes to mirror what she sees (especially anything that mommy does), that’s a pretty big warning sign and was reason enough for me to give #unsocial a go. I did have some mixed feelings, because a week and a half prior, I’d started

ARE YOU A FACEBOOK JUNKIE? Check out this Bergen Facebook Addiction Scale (created by Dr. Cecilie Andraessen at the University of Bergen (UiB), Norway, and colleagues) to assess if you might have a problem. Jot down your answers using one of the following: (1) Very rarely, (2) Rarely, (3) Sometimes, (4) Often and (5) Very often. 414 1

using Instagram to keep myself accountable to create daily art. Also, despite my knowing that I probably spend too much time being “social” (who doesn’t?), where else other than Facebook and Instagram can I post photos of my kids doing cute things and get instant feedback? And those likes—constant proof that my art is good and my kids are cute. I didn’t figure I’d have too much of a problem giving up it all up for a month. Wrong. The first day is ridiculously hard. In some bizarre phantom limb like scenario, I keep reaching for my iPhone for an app that’s no longer there. I almost cheat by accident on a computer, just through habit. I’m annoyed at myself. That weekend, my husband asks me if I’ve heard that Casey Kasem died. I give him a disgusted look and have to spell out for him that obviously not, since I’m cut off from the source where I normally get all of my news. He isn’t sympathetic. That night I eat too much ice cream and watch a terrible movie with Justin Long about him stalking some girl’s Facebook profile to make himself the “perfect guy” and am inordinately jealous of his instant accessibility. For the next few days, I also continue to do art and feel an inflated sense of confidence in my ability to continue my personal art goal without online accountability. I waste less time worrying about how many “likes” I get and spend more time actually making stuff. Another day, in a rare bout of craftiness, I work on a DIY swim cap for my daughter for a photo shoot concept I have, and since I can’t

You spend a lot of time thinking about Facebook or planning how to use it.

1.

You use Facebook so much that it has had a negative impact on your job/studies.

2.

Scoring "often" or "very often" on at least four of the six items are a positive indicator of Facebook addiction. Andraessen & colleagues also found that various personality traits related to the scale: for instance neuroticism and extraversion related positively, and conscientiousness related negatively. High scores on the BFAS are also, linked to going to bed very late and getting up very late, so it's a good idea to cut back if you feel you are missing out on early morning productivity.

You feel an urge to use Facebook more and more.

3.

You use Facebook in order to forget about personal problems.

4.

You have tried to cut down on the use of Facebook without success.

5.

You become restless or troubled if you are prohibited from using Facebook.

6.

post a photo, I text Joani a pic. Selectively showing people what you’re working on feels better and gets you better feedback. Somewhere along the way #unsocial starts to feel like some sort of vacation, and I enjoy the freedom of not keeping up with other people’s lives. Eventually, I stop reaching for my phone. It’s surprising, given how addicted I felt prior, how relatively quickly this switch happens. I do things I normally wouldn’t—try new recipes, read more, do more varied activities with my kids, throw the Frisbee with our usually neglected dog, take more photos with my actual camera. Apparently I take the vacation too literally, because I also stop doing art. Initially, I felt like a failure when the challenge ended, because I came into this thinking the focus would be to see if I could stick with my art despite not having outside feedback. The truth is, life happened—the kids and I got sick, and we had to postpone our family trip to see my grandma in Ohio, where I’d had visions of being even more inspired to paint and draw daily. I missed Facebook the most during this point, because I badly wanted to complain and get a little sympathy from other people. But then I considered the other result this month had on my life. While I ultimately slacked on art, I was more present for my family. When I got back on social media, it took me roughly an hour and a half to catch up on what I really missed. That’s absurd considering that’s how much time I used to spend on Facebook alone daily. That’s a lot of wasted time. I do think social media still has some validity in my life, in that it’s tough for me being a busy parent to carve time out to catch up with friends. I also missed seeing work from artists I’m inspired by and photos of my friends’ kids (keep posting, I really do love them). I don’t think I will give it all up for good, but I’m going to make a concerted effort to limit my time to something far more reasonable, like 15 minutes max a day when the kids are sleeping. Bonus, I'll probably start to have a little less mom guilt too.

Facebook has been linked to 66 percent of divorces in the U.S in the past five years. (Third Age)

66%

inweekly.net


POWERING DOWN—DOABLE DETOX PLANS So you’re intrigued by the idea of a social media detox, but don’t want to go cold turkey like team Inweekly did? We get that. What we did isn’t realistic in the long term anyway. You might not have to use Facebook, but you want to sometimes and that’s ok. The key with social media (and pretty much everything else in life) is moderation. First things first: Take a week or two and monitor your social media usage. Keep track of how much time you’re spending, plus other relevant factors like where and when you log in the most often. Once you’ve tracked your time and have an honest number (there really isn’t any point in lying—this is for you, not your boss or therapist), make a list of what else you could have done with that time. Read a book, take a few classes at the gym, plant a garden, teach your kid to read… When you start to think about time spent online in terms like that, it begins to make the idea of unplugging a little easier, doesn’t it? You might also notice a pattern based on where and when you tend to kill

time on social media most frequently.If it is at home during the evening, that might explain why you can’t remember the last time you cooked dinner. Or if it’s in bed, that might explain why you and your significant other aren’t as umm… “close” as you used to be. Now that you’ve got a clear picture of how your online life is affecting your real life, picking a strategy that will work and actually benefit you should be a little easier. Here are some of our favorite game plans:

OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND

•• Put your phone away when you walk in the door and don’t look at until after dinner. Or before bed. Or the next morning. Whatever works for you.

GO SCREEN FREE

If you set aside “screen free” time, you’ll be limiting your social media usage by default—sometimes it really is that simple. We know a family that does this one Saturday a month and couple that has weekly screen free date nights. Technically TVs are screens too, so whether you go that far is your call.

TRY PHONE STACKING

• Phone stacking is a "game" for people who find themselves distracted while out with friends. How it works: have everybody in your group put their phones in the middle of the table. Whoever looks at theirs first has to buy the next round or pick up the check.

DON'T CHARGE IT

• Allow yourself to use your devices until

QS0311-SOGO Vietri1/8 page ad IN.indd 1

the battery dies, but restrict how often you can recharge them. This will keep you from scrolling mindlessly on Pintrest for hours.

BEDDING DOWN

• The only thing worse than sleeping next to a buzzing iPhone is sleeping next to someone who’s always on their iPhone. Banning digital devices from the bedroom will help you sleep and in a lot of cases reconnect with your partner—just ask Marc Jacobs. Don’t forget to dust off your old school alarm clock though.

GIVE YOURSELF A DIGITAL CURFEW

• If you find yourself glued to a device at night and having a hard time falling asleep, try assigning a curfew—something like “no iPads after 10 p.m.” or “No screens after The Daily Show.”

BUDDY SYSTEM

• There really is strength in numbers, so try and get your best friend or significant other to detox with you. Then you can get together and talk about how much you’re aren’t missing on social media.

7/28/14 8:47 AM

unique & affordable

Join us for Wine Tastings Thursdays 5-7 p.m. 27 S. 9th Ave.

433-WINE or 433-9463

www.aragonwinemarket.com July 31, 2014

DO IT.

facebook.com/themagnoliaeph 15


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