Inweekly march 9 2017 issue

Spring Fever Things to see, hear and do this season (and into the next) Independent News | March 9, 2017 | Volume 18 | Number 10 | inweekly.net

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winners & losers

outtakes

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5

buzz 10

Every different artistic movement is a reaction to the previous one.

a&e

cover story

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13

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publisher Rick Outzen

art director Richard Humphreys

editor & creative director Joani Delezen

contributing writers Duwayne Escobedo, Jennifer Leigh, Chuck Shepherd, Shelby Smithey

contact us info@inweekly.net

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Independent News is published by Inweekly Media, Inc., P.O. Box 12082, Pensacola, FL 32591. (850)438-8115. All materials published in Independent News are copyrighted. Š 2015 Inweekly Media, Inc. All rights reserved.

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winners & losers

Daniel Durkin The Winners & Losers division is still recovering from Mardi Gras and turned in this allwinners version of their column before its week-long recovery.

DANIEL DURKIN The assistant professor

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in the University of West Florida Department of Social Work was recently named the Alzheimer's Association Ambassador for the Florida Panhandle and selected to the Board of Directors for Covenant Alzheimer's Care. The Alzheimer's Ambassador Program is designed to enhance the Alzheimer's Association's federal government relations efforts through personal contact between targeted members of Congress and constituents to hold them accountable to their commitment to fighting Alzheimer's.

PHS INTERNATIONAL BACCALAUREATE PROGRAM The IB program at Pen-

sacola High School has a dozen National Merit Finalists: Carla Dias, Nada Eldawy, Sarah Escobedo, Madeline Hawkins, Allen Litvak, Audrey Mahon, Cody Wolfe, Katherine McCall, Lisa Liebens, Anna Neville, Madison Michles and Kelly Wu. Eight other PHS students earned National Merit Commended Scholar status based on their results on the Preliminary SAT in their junior year.

IDGROUP The local organization development and branding firm took home two coveted Best of Show awards at the American Advertising Federation local ADDY Awards competition. In addition to the Best of Show awards for work on Acumen Medical Imaging & Interventional and Inspira Health, the firm received a Judge's Award, 15 gold awards, and seven silver awards, for a total of 25 awards.

WOERNER LANDSCAPING AND PET SUPPLY The company hosted a special

promotion that donated a small bag of dog food for every bag purchased from Feb. 6-11. The goal was to donate 1,200 pounds of dog food. The promotion was so successful that Woerner ended up donating over 3,098 pounds.

A DAY WITHOUT A WOMAN Grassroots feminist organizers across the globe held a one-day strike for women on Wednesday, March 8. The day was also International Women's Day. Women participated in 35 countries, including Argentina, Poland, South Korea, Russia, Ireland, Israel, Italy and the United States. In North Carolina, the Chapel Hill-Carrboro City school district closed to accommodate its teachers who joined the protest.

KILTON KINGSMAN & CHARLES GOULD The two Angel Flight Southeast

pilots will be honored as "Pilot of the Year" Honorees for the Florida Panhandle Region in April. Angel Flight Southeast, Inc. is a non-profit volunteer pilot organization that provides free air transportation throughout Florida by private aircraft to distant medical facilities when commercial air service is not available, impractical or simply not affordable. Kingsman, who has been flying with Angel Flight Southeast since 2014, has a Cessna and is based out of Ferguson Airport.

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outtakes

by Rick Outzen

PREPARING FOR BRAC Congressman Matt Gaetz expects to see the Base Closure and Realignment Commission (BRAC) soon, something we have avoided for the past dozen years.

The BRAC process looks for efficiencies in the Defense Department by realigning military commands and closing military installations deemed to be no longer necessary. More than 350 installations have been closed in five BRAC rounds: 1988, 1991, 1993, 1995, and 2005.

BRAC hasn't been kind to Pensacola.

In 2005, Pensacola Naval Air Station lost the Defense Finance and Accounting Service (DFAS) and its 300 employees to DFAS sites in Ohio and Indiana. Under the same realignment plan, our community also lost Officer Candidate School that merged with another officers' school in Newport, R.I. The 1993 BRAC plan closed the Naval Aviation Depot at NAS Pensacola, costing the area 2,600 civilian jobs.

On Monday, Mar. 6, on "Pensacola Speaks," Rep. Gaetz said local leaders need to prepare for the next BRAC. "Just weeks ago, in front of the Armed Services Committee, the Vice Chiefs of the Joint Chiefs of Staff all testified that the military wants a BRAC," he said. "You know, we can either wring our hands about that and get nervous or we can get prepared."

Gaetz had met earlier in the day with Pensacola business leaders to elicit advice and input about what are some of the defense priorities that "not only ensure that we've got a well-equipped fighting force, but that also have spillover economic benefits for the Pensacola community."

The key will be to find commands and functions that our military bases and community perform well. Gaetz believes he knows what that should be.

He said, "My hope is that if there is a BRAC as an opportunity to find all of the naval cyber mission that is occurring around the country and attract as much of that mission as possible to Corry Station where we've got some great cyber warriors right now innovating and plowing ahead in really what is the new frontier of warfare."

Fortunately, Escambia County has taken steps in that direction. Both the University of West Florida and Pensacola State College have respected programs in cybersecurity. FloridaWest, iTen Wired, and CyberThon have focused on attracting the next generation of cyber warriors.

Gaetz told Inweekly, "I want cyber missions to be housed in Northwest Florida because if we look at the nature of warfare going forward, that's where the money's going to be, and I want it right here in our community."

We agree. {in} rick@inweekly.net

The key will be to find commands and functions that our military bases and community perform well.

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5

GAETZ OFFERS POLITICAL INSIGHTS

Don Gaetz / Courtesy Photo

By Duwayne Escobedo Don Gaetz promised himself he would take three months off after his 22-year political career, which included serving as the President of the Florida Senate, ended because of term limits.

He already had turned down U.S. Congressman Jeff Miller's advice to run for the first congressional district. Instead, he spoke to his son about dropping out of the race for the Florida Senate and running for Miller's seat.

"I never had a passionate desire to be in Washington," said the 69-year-old Gaetz, who did work there as a youngster for North Dakota's senior U.S. Senator Milton R. Young. "I was the absolute go-to-fetch-it boy."

His 34-year-old son Matt, in the end, did decide to run and won 69 percent of the vote in November. He now serves Northwest Florida on Capitol Hill, sleeping on an air mattress in his Washington, D.C. office.

"He's better, stronger, and a more forceful personality than I am," Gaetz said proudly of his son.

Today, the elder Gaetz enjoys reading "a large stack" of books, sitting on his porch early

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in the morning listening to the Gulf of Mexico, doing remodeling projects with his wife Vicki, watching sunsets with her, being a good father to his children, Matt and 31-year-old daughter Erin, and running his Pensacola senior healthcare company, TLC Caregivers.

"That will be enough for me in my declining years," said Gaetz, who served in the Senate from 2006 to 2016.

While he insisted he is out of the political business, the savvy Gaetz still stays updated on the pulse of state government. He said his friends, Gov. Rick Scott, Senate President Joe Negron and House Speaker Richard Corcoran, all entered the Legislative session, which began Mar. 7, with their own agendas. Gaetz said he and former House Speaker Will Weatherford went into sessions on the same page when he served as Senate president from 2012-2014.

"You have an odd chemistry right now," Gaetz said. "The Senate president and House speaker are at odds and don't speak to each other. The governor is at odds with one or the other. It's a three-part harmony that at the moment is discordant."

One reason for the differences, according to Gaetz, is that Scott has his eye on a U.S. Senate seat and Corcoran would like to become the next governor. Negron has not made his future political aspirations known.

"They're all looking beyond what they're doing until the next election," he said. "There will be a lot of disagreements."

Although Gaetz pushed through ethics legislation that prevents former members of the Legislature from lobbying their past colleagues, he said he hopes that 75 percent, or $1.5 billion of the $2 billion oil spill settlement from BP for the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, remains headed to Northwest Florida like he tried to ensure.

Gaetz said Northwest Floridians should worry about receiving the BP money because Corcoran is against "corporate welfare," while Gov. Scott believes "writing checks to businesses is exactly what a governor should do."

Plus, he added that there are 161 politicians in the House, Senate, and Governor's office and you are "going to have some grabby hands."

"I believe in the end (Corcoran and Negron) will keep their promises," Gaetz said.

Another major Gaetz concern? The $600 million set aside for the rebuilding of the 57-year-old Pensacola Bay Bridge. The new six-lane bridge connecting Pensacola and Gulf Breeze is scheduled to be completed in 2020.

"We have to make sure that bridge is built," Gaetz said. "I won't breathe a sigh of relief until that first car crosses the new bridge."

Gaetz, the former Senate Education Committee chairman and Okaloosa County Superintendent and school board member, said Gov. Scott lobbied him to raise the "Required Local Effort" during his last two years in the Florida Senate.

The property tax is set by the Legislature to fund the state portion of education funding. The tax is based on estimates of what must be generated from each of Florida's 67 school districts. Gaetz said about $455 million more would be generated for Florida to use for its education priorities because of the increase in land values.

"I would not raise taxes (on property owners)," Gaetz said. "It never made it out of my committee. The governor might come back and say, ‘Hey, Gaetz is gone. There's nobody here to stop me.'"

Negron, a Stuart, Fla., Republican, did select Gaetz as one of nine of that legislative body's appointees to the Florida Constitution Revision Commission.

Every 20 years, Florida forms a 37-member commission to go through the state constitution and make changes that Florida voters then must vote to approve in the 2018 election. The commission spends a year conducting public hearings across the

state before submitting them to voters.

The Governor appoints 15, including the chairman, the House Speaker and Senate President each appoint nine, the Supreme Court Chief Justice appoints three members, and the Florida Attorney General is an automatic member.

The last review occurred in 1997-1998 and voters approved 12 of the commission's 13 recommendations.

It's a post that Gaetz takes very seriously. He said his hope is the commission will remain open minded about proposed changes and avoid partisan fights over the Florida Constitution that "reads more like the book of Leviticus."

"We are dealing with the architecture of the government of Florida in a purple state," he said. "If we make hard right wing positions, the voters of Florida are not going to accept the changes. I've made it clear I have no agenda."

However, Gaetz reported many Tallahassee politicians support term limits for state Supreme Court justices and want to see the Senate vet the Governor's appointees to the High Court. Today, the governor can appoint judges with no questions asked. Abortion, guns, and taxes also are being pushed among other issues by those interested in the revision process.

"I've already been lobbied on it," Gaetz said.

This may be his last public service.

Gaetz reiterated he has no plans to run for political office again.

"It's a pleasure to sit in the stands and cheer on the game," Gaetz said. "For 22 years I was wearing the uniform, rolling around in the mud and the blood. I have no desire to put on the pads and uniform again. But my wife says never say, ‘No.'" For 20 years, Gaetz has owned property and has run a healthcare company in Pensacola. So… "I will probably not run for Mayor of Pensacola," Gaetz said, chuckling. {in}

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7

LOCAL ASKS

By Duwayne Escobedo Northwest Florida voters no longer have experienced lawmakers watching out for them in Tallahassee.

Instead, the Northwest Florida delegation includes three Florida House members, two who are freshmen. In the Senate, both men are serving the chamber for the first time.

The most experienced of the bunch is 39-year-old State Rep. Clay Ingram (R-Pensacola), who has served in the House since 2010.

While Doug Broxson is serving his first year in the Florida Senate, he previously served six years in the House.

No longer is former Senate President Don Gaetz in office to ensure this region, long ignored, gets a fair shake.

What are some local leaders asking the Legislature to pass this session, which opened March 7? Read on.

ESCAMBIA COUNTY BOARD OF COUNTY COMMISSIONERS

Escambia County, which uses lobbyist Richard Gentry, has several priorities, including: •Ensure the existing law requiring $1.5 billion of the $2 billion settlement, or 75 percent, of the Triumph Gulf Coast funds from the BP Deep Water Horizon oil spill settlement come to Northwest Florida. The county also wants to ensure that Northwest Floridians make the decisions about how the funds are allowed to be used for economic development, infrastructure, and workforce development projects.

•Create an exit and corridor near Interstate 10 and Beulah. Known as the Muscogee Freight Corridor, it would provide access from U.S. Highway 29 and Becks Lane Road to The Bluffs, a proposed 6,000-acre industrial campus that could eventually include as many as 60 new industrial and manufacturing companies employing about 15,000 people.

District 2 Commissioner and Chairman Doug Underhill said the county is trying to

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prepare for future growth in the area.

“Traffic numbers now don’t support the need for the interchange,” he said. “If we wait until we need it, that will be too late.”

•Upgrade the Innerarity Island Water System with $1.73 million in funding. It is the largest privately-owned sewer system in the county.

Underhill said the appropriation would be "precedent-setting" because it would allow the county to upgrade other private systems.

“This is a big deal with how we move the county forward,” Underhill said. “It’s a problem we could deal with for the next 10 to 15 years.”

The Board of County Commissioners expressed support for Criminal Justice Reform legislation that would: •Create a pilot program that would reduce or eliminate the instances in which criminal charges can be brought for driving with a suspended license (DWSL), when the underlying license suspension is tied to non-driving related offenses, such as if someone owes money for child support. The aim is to reduce inmates jailed for the offense.

•Provide for statutory amendments that give more discretion to the judiciary in sentencing non-violent offenders. Sentencing score sheets and any mandatory sentencing guidelines should allow the judge to have broad discretion in determining appropriate sentences for non-violent offenders. Judges’ options should include non-jail sentences.

•Establish alternative sentences for the mentally ill to remove them from county detention. The current system strains county resources for medical, safety, educational and legal needs the mentally ill require. Additional funding and programs would improve service to them.

Other items on the Board’s legislative agenda include: •Allow local governments to use its Land Development Codes and zoning to control medical marijuana dispensaries.

•Assist the county in funding the cleanup of Bayou Chico to encourage economic devel-

opment of the water body. The county is also asking for about $20 million to help dredge the industrialized bayou.

•Aid in the payment for Pensacola Beach renourishment and the restoration of dunes at Perdido Key.

GREATER PENSACOLA CHAMBER

Chamber leaders are asking the Legislature to support six initiatives. Two of its requests overlap with the county, including ensuring BP funding remains in Northwest Florida.

It also calls for legislation that reforms the criminal justice system but with one addition. It would provide that juveniles receive citations for non-violent offenses, instead of being arrested. The chamber argues this would save tax dollars and prevent youth from having the stigma of a criminal record.

Other chamber priorities: •Create legislation that will stabilize workers’ compensation rates that the chamber argues have become a burden on small businesses, prevented them from creating jobs and hurt employees’ wages and benefits. It points to two Florida Supreme Court decisions that have led to a spike in workers’ compensation by an average of 14.5 percent across the state.

•Schedule a Florida Constitution Revision Commission public hearing in Pensacola like it did during the last comprehensive review in 1997.

•Provide tax credits to businesses that hire veterans. The proposed legislation would provide a one-time $3,000 tax credit to each hired veteran and a $5,000 credit for each hired disabled veteran. Tax credits are capped under the program at $25,000 annually. Veterans must be employed for one year before becoming eligible for the tax credits. The bill also requires their salary must be at least 80 percent of the median income for Florida veterans.

•Support Gov. Rick Scott's plan for $618 million in tax cuts, including the 25 percent cut

to taxes on commercial leases that is estimated to save Florida's businesses $454 million. Other tax cuts included: 1) Exempting nearly a quarter of businesses from paying corporate income taxes; 2) Creating a sales tax-free shopping period for students going back to school; 3) Implementing a disaster preparedness sales tax holiday; 4) Providing military veterans a sales tax-free shopping period; and 5) Eliminating sales tax on college textbooks for one year.

Todd Thomson, Greater Pensacola Chamber vice president of public affairs, said, "These are the pressing issues that the chamber sees as having the biggest impact on Escambia County. We call on the Legislature to adopt our pro-business legislative agenda."

CITY OF PENSACOLA

Inweekly requested Pensacola Mayor Ashton Hayward’s 2017 legislative priorities for his lobbyist, The Fiorentino Group, but received no response from the Mayor’s office, despite several phone calls and emails.

The City of Pensacola pays The Fiorentino Group $60,000 annually to provide “state government relations consulting services to promote the interests of the City and to ensure the success of policies beneficial to Pensacola.” The mayor has not given the Pensacola City Council a full report on the lobbyist’s work in 2016 or his expectations for them in 2017.

However, the February “Moment with the Mayor” video records Mayor Hayward saying the city had “great” and “big” meetings with the Northwest Florida delegation and Speaker of the House Richard Corcoran. “(We talked about) Triumph fund importance and making sure money comes back to Escambia County and Pensacola, Florida,” he said. “This money is going to be transformational for our great city and our county.

We just want to stress that and make sure our voice is heard over in Tallahassee.”

The video had 192 views on YouTube as of Monday, March 6. {in}

inweekly.net

DIFFERENCE MAKERS MyCareerShines Surpasses Another Major Milestone More than 300,000 Sunshine State students and adults are planning their future on MyCareerShines, Florida’s comprehensive education and career planning system. The system is powered by a suite of age-appropriate online tools that allow students to develop a personalized education plan that connects interests and skills to careers and jobs. MyCareerShines is administered by the University of West Florida Innovation Institute and is free for all Florida students from middle school through college and beyond.

“MyCareerShines is helping students plan for the future,” said Dr. Karen Rasmussen, associate vice president of academic strategies. “Whether it is college, training or straight into the workforce, MyCareerShines gives students all the information and tools to succeed.”

MyCareerShines currently offers two online tools developed by Kuder, Inc., an internationally recognized career guidance services provider specializing in research-based career assessments. Students in middle and high school use Navigator® to develop an education plan that prepares them for college and a rewarding career after graduation. College students use Journey® to develop a plan to pursue and land their dream job.

“When students have a plan, they are more likely to stay on track, on time and on budget for earning their degree,” said Dr. Rasmussen. “MyCareerShines helps them make that plan, starting as early as seventh grade.”

Students build a plan by going through the step-by-step process or they access features in the system that meet their immediate needs. The system allows students to assess their interests and skills, explore the extensive catalog of careers, learn about the education requirements for their top job choices, make a plan for school, create resumes, prepare for interviews and find jobs.

MyCareerShines is fully funded by the Florida Legislature, which has made it a priority to prepare Floridians with the knowledge, skills and tools to succeed in school and the increasingly competitive global economy. The system is being implemented and managed by the UWF Innovation Institute, which also manages Florida’s Student Hub of Innovative Educational Services – FloridaShines, for short.

About MyCareerShines: MyCareerShines is Florida’s comprehensive education and career planning system. The system is powered by a suite of age-appropriate FREE online tools that allow students and job seekers to develop a personalized plan that connects interests, skills and education to careers and jobs.

About the UWF Innovation Institute: The Innovation Institute is a collaborative makerspace for building innovative solutions. The Innovation team, founded around the principles of extreme collaboration, high energy, deep research and innovative thinking are focused on solving significant educational challenges. One of the cornerstones of the Institute is it focus on being a “Thought Leader” in education – creating and implementing innovative tools, programs and resources to the advancement of education and learning.

About Kuder, Inc.: More than 165 million people have used Kuder’s research-based career assessment, education planning, and guidance resources to help visualize which industry or career, field of study, or school to pursue next in life. Kuder helps ensure that people of all ages can unlock the power of their own potential, and create a bright future. For more information, visit www.kuder.com or call 800.314.8972.

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Sheriff David Morgan / Courtesy Photo MORGAN NO MAS Last week, a persistent rumor surfaced that Escambia County Sheriff David Morgan intended to run for Pensacola mayor in 2018. Inweekly ran down the gossip and found out a few city voters received a phone call about only three possible mayoral candidates: Mayor Ashton Hayward, Sheriff David Morgan, and Commissioner Grover Robinson.

The Inweekly poll didn't include Sheriff Morgan and had four other possible candidates: Commissioner Lumon May, Pensacola Council President Brian Spencer, former State Rep. Dee Dee Davis and two-time Masters champion Bubba Watson.

Inweekly contacted Sheriff Morgan who said he has no interest in running for the mayor of Pensacola. He will retire from public office when his third term ends in 2020.

Whoever paid for the second poll has yet to release the results.

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PROTESTS HEALTHY On "Pensacola

Speaks" last week, Congressman Matt Gaetz talked about the protestors who came to his Open Gaetz Day meetings and why he didn't cancel the events.

"My motivation is to demonstrate to my colleagues in the Republican Party that we've got the best argument," he said.

"We've just got to have the courage to go out and make it. We cannot just have a bunker mentality when people who don't agree with us choose to protest."

He continued, "Protest is the sign of a healthy democracy. It's okay. We've got to embrace it, and we've got to go out there and be with our folks."

National news networks ran a clip of Gaetz calling for President Donald Trump to release his federal tax returns.

"I got hundreds of questions during Open Gaetz Day, and only one about Donald Trump's tax returns, so I don't want to over-

state the case," he said. "Now, if I were Donald Trump, I would release my tax returns."

He explained his stance. "The primary reason I would do it would be to take this issue out of the arsenal for the mainstream media. Let's get to the business of healthcare reform, and tax reform, and regulatory reform."

Gaetz hoped that those who attended his town halls got the message that his desire to abolish the Environmental Protection Agency doesn't mean he doesn't want to protect the environment.

"I simply don't think that this $8 billion bureaucracy is effective at actually going and protecting the environment, and that's not a view that I hold, or that industry holds," Gaetz said. "That's a view that is reflected in the government accountability audit and report that suggested that the EPA was showing favoritism in their grants, and all this money that we would hope would go to help the environment actually wasn't ending up in the environment."

PENSACOLA'S GOT TALENT Open-

ing Day for the Pensacola Blue Wahoos is Thursday, April 6. The team is looking for local talent to show off their skills on game day through National Anthem performances, main gate entertainment, and in-game stunts.

Pensacola's Got Talent will be held Saturday, Mar. 18 at Blue Wahoos Stadium from 10a.m.–12 p.m. Interested individuals and groups need to reserve an audition spot by calling 934-8444.

Auditions will be held on the field in front of a panel of judges from WEAR, 97.1 FM The Ticket, Pensacola News Journal and the Blue Wahoos. Contestants will enter through the Regions Club entrance that is right of the main gate on first base side.

CITY HOUSING FUNDING CUT

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the Section 8 Housing Choice Voucher program. According to Housing Administrator Marcie Whitaker, the wait to receive assistance for applicants on the waiting list could be as long as five years.

Whitaker explained the problem in a memo to City Administrator Eric Olson.

The Housing Division has reached the utilization goal of 99% in the Section 8 Housing Choice voucher program.

"However, based upon correspondence from the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development (Department), this funding level is not sustainable," wrote Whitaker. "The Department is operating under a Continuing Resolution (CR H.R. 2018) until April 28, 2017, and due to the CR the Department is allocating Housing Assistance Payment renewal funding at a 95% proration."

Because of the reduced funding, the voucher program participation must be reduced by approximately 90 families.

Whitaker wrote, "I plan to meet the renewal funding level through attrition of program participants and by not admitting new families to the program."

She added, "Based upon the anticipated program funding level and the need to reduce the number of program participants, the Housing Division will be closing the waiting list effective May 1, 2017."

TRAILBLAZERS In honor of Black His-

tory Month, the University of West Florida University College, Office of Equity and Diversity and Epps Christian Center partnered to award eight community members who inspire and empower the Pensacola area.

Quint Studer, entrepreneur and philanthropist, won the inaugural Trailblazer Award. Dr. Kim LeDuff, UWF chief diversity officer, associate vice provost and dean of University College, said the committee recognized Studer for his commitment to

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establishing Pensacola as “America’s first Early Learning City.”

“To give each child the best chance to live a full and healthy life the first three years of their life are most important. Why? Eighty-five percent of a child’s brain is developed during that time,” Studer said. “By creating America’s first Early Learning City, we will treat the cause of poverty, not treat symptoms. By helping every parent learn the skills on building their child’s brain, they will be ready for kindergarten. This means they will most likely graduate from high school. This means better wages, less crime, and less early pregnancies. All children are our children.”

The other winners included entrepreneurs and community advocates Lloyd and Robin Reshard (community service); attorney Fred Gant, Esq. (helping hand); radio broadcaster Robert Hill (community voice); Latino Media Gulf Coast Inc. President Grace Resendez McCaffrey (servant leader); Rev. John Powell (faith and service); and Boys & Girls Club of Greater Pensacola Executive Director Leslie Hunter-Huff (educational leadership).

“The whole idea of the Trailblazer Awards is recognizing and awarding community members who have made a lasting impact on the community,” LeDuff said. “All of the award winners have served segments of our community that often go unnoticed.”

ETHICS IN BUSINESS NOMINEES The University of West Florida College of Business, in partnership with the Combined Rotary Clubs of Pensacola, is accepting nominations for the 2017 Combined Rotary of Pensacola Ethics in Business Award through Mar. 31.

“We are proud that this will be the 15th year that the Rotary Clubs of Pensacola and the UWF College of Business have recognized Pensacola community leaders who adhere to high ethical standards in their business and professional practices,” said Dr. Ed Ranelli, professor and dean emeritus of the UWF College of Business.

The primary criterion for award nominees is adherence to the high ethical standards of honesty, integrity, and consistency in dealing with employees, contractors and customers, while positively enhancing the economic well-being of the organization’s stakeholders and providing jobs, opportunities and profits. Additional criteria are based on participation in activities that are beneficial to the community beyond the provision of economic benefits and service as a leader or innovator in the firm’s business sector.

This award is given each spring annually to one individual from the small business March 9, 2017

sector (less than 50 employees) and one individual from the large business sector (50 or more employees). The award recognizes those who exemplify the concept of “service above self” and who work to build a positive sense of worth within both the business community and the broader community as a whole.

Nominations should include a description of the nominee’s ethical activities and address the criteria outlined on the nomination form. Nomination forms may be picked up at any Pensacola-area Rotary Club or downloaded from the UWF College of Business website, uwf.edc/cob.

DOWNTOWN GARAGE OPENS IN APRIL On "Pensacola Speaks," Quint Studer

said he expects the Southtowne Apartments parking garage to open next month.

"It's essentially complete," he said, "On April 17, the Y will be able to start using the parking garage."

People will notice other changes in the development on the former site of the Pensacola News Journal.

"We've put lights that you don't have to put up, so we have a pretty brightly lit place," said Studer. "We now have 24/7 security on the site, making sure there's safety at all times.

The framing of the first-floor apartments on the Tarragona Street side has begun.

"It's moving, and we're real excited," he said. "We spend $650,000 a week on construction."

VETERANS EXPO The Veterans Coalition of Northwest Florida is collaborating with a coalition of local veteran service organizations to present the Greater Pensacola Veterans & Family Symposium & Expo, a free day of informational sessions for the benefit of local veterans and their families.

The expo will be held from 9 a.m.-3 p.m. on March 25, at the University of West Florida Conference Center. This year’s theme is "Strength through Community." It is designed to highlight the benefits associated with the veteran connecting with our community.

Provided free of charge for veterans and their families in Northwest Florida, the event offers information designed to foster their ability to find suitable employment, health care, claims processing, emergency funding, housing, legal assistance and other significant benefits and resources.

Food and beverage during the event are also provided at no cost to the participants.

Registration is open to all veterans and their families at: gpveteranssymposium. eventbrite.com. {in} 11

Photo by Josh Saul

Mountain Stage with host Larry Groce,

has been the home of live music on public radio for more than 30 years.

Recorded in front of a live audience in West Virginia, Mountain Stage features performances from seasoned legends and emerging stars in genres ranging from folk, blues, and country to indie rock, synth pop, world music, alternative, and beyond.

Saturdays 5 PM

on WUWF 88.1 FM or wuwf.org.

Learn more and find the full list of WUWF programs at wuwf.org/ programs.

BOTTOMLESS CHAMPAGNE AND MIMOSAS FOR $5 AND BLOODY MARYS FOR $2

SUNDAY BAYSIDE BRUNCH Every Sunday from 11 a.m. until 2 p.m. From eggs Benedict to bottomless champagne, our Bayside Brunch is the perfect Sunday starter! For details, visit fishhousepensacola.com.

OPEN DAILY AT 11 A.M. 路 (850) 470-0003 路 ON THE WATER DOWNTOWN 路 600 S. BARRACKS ST. 路 FISHHOUSEPENSACOLA.COM

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inweekly.net

Spring Fever Things to see, hear and do this season (and into the next)

March 9, 2017

Minus a few random days here and there, we really didn’t have much of a winter this year. But that’s still not going to stop

us from getting excited about spring and all that it means on the Gulf Coast—like longer days, crawfish boils and the return of Bands on the Beach.

To help you welcome the upcoming season, we’ve put together the ultimate to-do list so you can get organized and make the most of the months ahead.

13

Get Festive Upcoming music, art and food festivals Pensacola Film Festival Spring Screen Series March 10-11 pensacolacinemaart.com

Gulf Breeze Celebrates the Arts March 11-12 gulfbreezearts.com

Smokin' in the Square March 17-18 smokininthesquare.com

Ciclovia—Open Streets Pensacola March 25 pensacolaopenstreets.com

Bayfront Wine Festival April 1 bayfrontwinefestival.com

Pensacola JazzFest April 1-2 jazzpensacola.com

Perdido Key Wine & Art Festival April 21-23 visitperdido.com

Pensacola Beach Crawfish Festival April 21-23 facebook.com/bamboo.willies

Pensacola Crawfish Festival April 28-30 fiestaoffiveflags.org

Hangout Music Festival May 19-21 hangoutmusicfest.com

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Save The Dates More annual events to plan your weekends around McGuire's Prediction 5K Run March 11 mcguiresirishpub.com

Go Irish on the Island St. Paddy’s Day Pub Crawl March 17 visitpensacolabeach.com

Culture Vulture Must-see cultural events

Mamma Mia! (part of the

My Fair Lady Now-March 19

April 19

A Bark to Remember April 1

pensacolalittletheatre.com

Blue Wahoos Home Opener April 6

pensacolasymphony.com

Record Store Day at Revolver Records April 22

pensacolaopera.com

facebook.com/gulfcoasthealthcare

bluewahoos.com

facebook.com/revolverfl

Saenger Theatre’s Broadway in Pensacola Series)

pensacolasaenger.com

Center Stage Gala March 10

Operazzi Ball April 22

Dead Man Walking March 17 and 19

Charlotte’s Web April 28-May 7

Color Me Cabaret April 1

Bernstein & Beethoven April 29

Russian Spectacular April 1

Wonder of the World May 12-20

Alice in Wonderland April 7-9

Music for Families May 20

pensacolalittletheatre.com

pensacolasymphony.com

balletpensacola.com

pensacolaopera.com

pensacolalittletheatre.com

pensacolasymphony.com

pensacolalittletheatre.com

pensacolasymphony.com

inweekly.net

Take A Tour Perfect places to play tourist for a day Historic Pensacola Village historicpensacola.org

National Naval Aviation Museum navalaviationmuseum.org

Routine Worthy Musical Musts Concerts you really shouldn’t miss

Pensacola MESS Hall

palafoxmarket.com

facebook.com/farmersmarketsantarosa

City and Colour March 22

Bands on the Beach Every Tuesday beginning April 4 and running through Oct. 31

Dinosaur Jr. March 26

vinylmusichall.com

WHY? April 7

vinylmusichall.com

pensacolalighthouse.org

Palafox Market Every Saturday

amphitheateratthewharf.com

vinylmusichall.com

Pensacola Lighthouse and Museum Pensacola Beach Gulf Pier

Luke Bryan March 17 and 18

Generationals March 24

emeraldcoasttours.net

Reoccurring events worth making a regular thing

Santa Rosa Farmers Market Every Saturday

vinylmusichall.com

Emerald Coast Tours

fishpensacolabeachpier.com pensacolamesshall.org

Pensacola Museum of Art pensacolamuseum.org

visitpensacolabeach.com

Gallery Night March 17, April 21, May 19 and June 16 gallerynightpensacola.or gallerynightpensacola.org

Music Under the Stars Series March 9 (featuring Roman Street Duo) March 27 (featuring Nikki Talley) May 12 (featuring Grayson Capps)

facebook.com/fromthegroundupgarden

Explosions in the Sky April 8 soulkitchenmobile.com

Spoon April 27

soulkitchenmobile.com

Blink 182 May 2

pensacolabaycenter.com

Sturgill Simpson May 6

amphitheateratthewharf.com

March 9, 2017

15

WEEK OF MARCH 9-16

Arts & Entertainment art, film, music, stage, books and other signs of civilization...

Make It Modern

by Shelby Smithey

Photo Courtesy Of Pensacola Museum of Art Take a trip down 'Modern Lane' at the Pensacola Museum of Art. Early Modernists, such as Henri Matisse and Pablo Picasso, join Surrealists Roberto Matta and Salvador Dali and Pop Artists Andy Warhol, Roy Lichtenstein and Keith Haring in "Modern Masters: Twentieth Century Prints."

"The Modern Masters exhibit is a selection of prints from the Reading Public Museum in Pennsylvania that highlights the progression of art through the twentieth century," said PMA Curatorial Assistant Suzanne Slabaugh.

"Walking through this exhibit, one is able to see realistic portraitures side by side with abstracted portraitures. It highlights different artistic movements throughout the twentieth century, from Post-Impressionism to Pop Art." Twentieth century art, often referred to as Modern Art, actually began in the late nine-

616 1

teenth century with the movements of PostImpressionism, Art Nouveau, and Symbolism.

Artists began to question the notion of imitating nature and self-consciously emphasized the materials of painting—leaving visible brush strokes, areas of blank canvas and purposefully distorting points of view and perspective—reminding viewers that ultimately, painting can never truly mimic nature. This exhibit presents many of the styles and techniques popularized by the various movements that made up the one hundred years of twentieth century art.

Slabaugh said that well-known works such as Warhol's "Mao" and Robert Indiana's iconic "Love" will be on exhibit, as well as lesserknown, yet just as important works, by Roberto Matta, Jim Dine, and Keith Haring.

"Warhol's ‘Mao' is on display, although it isn't quite as popular as ‘Marilyn Monroe.'

ism, by creating dreamlike worlds. It was also Mao was Warhol's first political print and is manifested through Abstraction, where commonly reproduced," Slabaugh said. "Robert feelings were reduced to expressive lines Indiana's ‘Love' is at the museum as well. This and colors. word can be seen in NYC in sculpture form in "Every different artistic movement is a the iconic stacking of the letters with surroundreaction to the previous one," she said. ing bold bright colors."

In place of naturalism, artists emphasized Although modern art includes many differformal elements such as color and line, infusent important movements, some of the most ing their works with emotional content and popular were Surrealism and Pop Art. personal vision. Even as cutting edge art moved "Of course, it is hard to delineate between toward abstraction, many artists adhered to the most popular movements," Slabaugh said. the human figure and representation in their "Both Salvador Dali and Andy Warhol were at work. Social realism, regionalism, Pop Art, and the front of each movement, respectively."

Photorealism continued to enlist the human Artistic movements of the early 20th cenform as subject matter. tury, such as Cubism, Fauvism, and Expression"The entire purpose of the show is to highism, were characterized by a shift of art "needlight these movements and show the vast array ing to look real" to a more imaginative form. of artistic styles throughout the 100 years that By the 1910s, artists achieved pure abstraction, shaped the 20th century," Slabaugh said. {in} reducing forms to expressive lines or blocks of color. Representational or figurative art was largely abandoned in the 1940s and 1950s, when abstract expressionism and Color Field painting took the lead as the reigning international styles.

WHAT: An exhibit featuring twentieth century "Artists began to question the prints notion of imitating nature in the late WHEN: On display now-May 6 nineteenth century and began to move WHERE: Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jefaway from that," Slabaugh said. "Alferson St. though there are some early twentieth COST: $4-$7, free for museum members and century pieces in this exhibition that children younger than 3 still look ‘real.' The popularity of phoDETAILS: pensacolamuseum.org tography also enhanced the painter's perception that it was no longer necesHALF-PRICED SUNDAYS sary to capture reality."

Your weekend just got artsier. PMA is now open Slabaugh said that one of the more on Sundays and tickets are half price—that means common themes of modern art is the adult admission is just $3.50. Sunday hours are shift from reality into a different form. noon until 4 p.m.

This was manifested through Surreal-

MODERN MASTERS

inweekly.net

calendar

GIVEAWAY: HANGOUT FEST 2017

PENSACOLA FILM FESTIVAL SPRING SCREEN SERIES 1:30, 4:30 and 7:30 p.m. Cost is $5

per film or $20 for a weekend pass. Films will screen at various locations, but all tickets should be purchased at the Voices of Pensacola Building, 117 E. Government St. pensacolacinemaart.com WINE TASTING 5-7 p.m. Free. City Grocery, 2050 N. 12th Ave. HAPPY HOUR COOK OUTS 5 p.m. Drink specials, free cookout. Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. sevillequarter.com GAY GRASSROOTS 6-8 p.m. Free. Ever’man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org

PENSACOLA SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA PRESENTS: CENTER STAGE GALA 6 p.m. $150.

If you're anything like us, you're already counting down the days until May 19—aka the first day of Hangout Fest 2017.

Headliners for this year's fest include Mumford & Sons, Twenty One Pilots, Frank Ocean and Chance The Rapper.

They've also got Major Lazer, Weezer, MGMT, Mac DeMarco and about 65 more acts we're dying to check out.

As if that badass line-up alone wasn't enough to get you packing up and heading to the beach, Inweekly has partnered with Hangout Fest to give away a pair of general admission, three-day passes to the festival.

All you have to do to win is tell us your name, email and who you'd bring with you to the beach. Super easy, right?

THURSDAY 3.9

WORK ON FLORIDA TRAIL 8 a.m. Regular

meet up of Western Gate Florida Trail Association to work on National Scenic Trail and side trail. Meet at Blackwater River Forestry Center, 11650 Munson Highway. meetup.com/ftawesterngate NATURAL HEALING/CANCER STUDY: COOKING WITH VEGETABLES 6-8:30 p.m.

Free. Ever’man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org.

WINE TASTING AT AWM 5 p.m. Aragon Wine Market, 27 S. 9th Ave. aragonwinemarket.com POP! SPARKLING WINE AND FOOD EVENT

5:30 p.m. $75 per person. Four wines, five courses. Jackson’s Steakhouse, 400 S. Palafox. jacksonsrestaurant.com March 9, 2017

You can enter the contest here: jotform.com/70584238491967 *Please note: Each email address entered will only be counted once. Winners must provide their own hotel and travel arrangements.

Contest ends March 31.

HANGOUT MUSIC FESTIVAL 2017

WHEN: Friday, May 19—Sunday, May 21 WHERE: Gulf Shores, AL TICKETS: Three day GA/VIP/SUPER VIP tickets on sale now DETAILS: hangoutmusicfest.com

HEALTHY SOUTHERN CUISINE 6 p.m. $35.

6-8 p.m. Pensacola Cooks Kitchen, 3670 Barrancas Ave. pensacolacooks.rezclick.com LATIN DANCE LESSONS AND PARTY 6:30-9 p.m. $10. Salsa, Cha Cha, Bachata and more. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd.

503-1123. $10. dancecraftfl.com MUSIC UNDER THE STARS SERIES: ROMAN STREET DUO 7 p.m. $15. From the Ground

Up Community Garden, 501 N. Hayne St. facebook.com/fromthegroundupgarden 2017 DANCE PENSACOLA 9 p.m. Dance competition. Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. sevillequarter.com

FRIDAY 3.10

PILATES MAT 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Ever’man

Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org

Skopelos at New World Landing, 600 S. Palafox. pensacolasymphony.com DATE NIGHT DANCING 6:30-8 p.m. $15.

Learn the basics of several romantic ballroom and country dance styles in unique group classes that keeps partners together.

DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. 503-1123. dancecraftfl.com COUPLES COOK: ST. PATTY’S PARTY CLASS 7 p.m. $50. Pensacola Cooks Kitchen, 3670 Barrancas Ave. pensacolacooks.rezclick.com OPEN MIC 7-11 p.m. Single Fin Cafe, 380 N. 9th Ave. facebook.com/singlefincafe TOMASEEN FOLEY’S IRISH TIMES 7:30-9 p.m. $7-$11, free for PSC students. Pensacola State College Lyceum, 1000 College Blvd. pensacolastate.edu MY FAIR LADY 7:30 p.m. $12-$30. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. pensacolalittletheatre.com UPCHURCH THE REDNECK 8 p.m. $10-$15. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox. vinylmusichall.com BACK PORCH COMEDY: BUBBS HARRIS 9 p.m. Back Porch Bar & Grill, 710 N. Palafox.

ALL-KREWE PAJAMA PARTY LOCK-IN 11 p.m.-5 a.m. March 11. $45. Sam’s Fun City, 6709 Fun City Blvd.

SATURDAY 3.11

SANTA ROSA FARMERS MARKET 8 a.m.-1

p.m. Fresh local produce, honey, baked goods and live music. Pace Presbyterian Church, Woodbine Road, Pace.

CLEAN UP WITH OCEAN HOUR 8:45 a.m.

Location one is Bay Bluffs Park at Scenic Highway and Summit Blvd. Second location is 2 miles north at Chimney Park at Scenic Highway and Langley Ave. For more information, contact oceanhourfl@gmail.com.

PALAFOX MARKET 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Fresh produce, live plants, baked goods, fine art and antiques. Items originate directly from participating vendors, including dozens of local farmers, home gardeners and area artists. Martin Luther King Jr. Plaza, N. Palafox. palafoxmarket.com COOKING DEMONSTRATIONS 9 a.m.-2 p.m.

"Eat with the Seasons." Palafox Market.

Martin Luther King Jr. Plaza, N. Palafox. palafoxmarket.com 40TH ANNUAL MCGUIRE’S ST. PATRICK’S DAY PREDICTION 5K RUN 9 a.m.-12 p.m.

$30. Registration ends March 9. McGuire’s Irish Pub, 600 E. Gregory St. mcguiresirishpub.com 17

calendar 23RD ANNUAL GULF BREEZE CELEBRATES THE ARTS FESTIVAL 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Gulf

Breeze High School, 675 Gulf Breeze Parkway.

GUMBO COOK OFF 10 a.m.-3:30 p.m. Fundraiser for Rotary Club. Shoreline Park, 800 Shoreline Dr., Gulf Breeze.

MUSCLE TESTING 101: THE BASICS 10 a.m.-11 p.m. Free. Ever’man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org MONSTER JAM 1 p.m. & 7 p.m. $15. Pensacola Bay Center, 201 E. Gregory St. pensacolabaycenter.com PENSACOLA FILM FESTIVAL SPRING SCREEN SERIES 1:30, 4:30 and 7:30 p.m. Cost is $5

per film or $20 for a weekend pass. Films will screen at various locations, but all tickets should be purchased at the Voices of Pensacola Building, 117 E. Government St. pensacolacinemaart.com RUMOURS: A FLEETWOOD MAC TRIBUTE 7 p.m. $12-$15. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox. vinylmusichall.com MY FAIR LADY 7:30 p.m. $12-$30. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. pensacolalittletheatre.com

SUNDAY 3.12

WAKE UP HIKE 7 a.m. Meet at Bay Bluffs Park, Scenic Highway at Summit Ave., for a brisk one to two-hour walk with brunch to follow at an area restaurant.

23RD ANNUAL GULF BREEZE CELEBRATES THE ARTS FESTIVAL 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Gulf Breeze

High School, 675 Gulf Breeze Parkway.

PURIM CARNIVAL 12:30 p.m. Free. Face painting, food, bounce house. Creative Learning Academy, 3151 Hyde Park Road.

MONSTER JAM 1 p.m. $15. Pensacola Bay Center, 201 E. Gregory St. pensacolabaycenter.com PENSACOLA PERFORMANCES: CROWNING GLORY 2 p.m. Free. Performances of

Mozart and Puccini. West Florida Public Library, 239 N. Spring St. MY FAIR LADY 3 p.m. $12-$30. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. pensacolalittletheatre.com

SOUTHEASTERN TEEN SHAKESPEARE COMPANY: SHENANIGANS 4-5 p.m. Free. 1010 N.

12th Ave. setsco.org/first-city-shakespeare FULL MOON MEDITATION WORKSHOP

6-7:30 p.m. Free. Ever’man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org

MONDAY 3.13

PILATES MAT 1:30-2:30 p.m. Free. Ever’man

Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org SEVILLE QUARTER MILERS 5:30 p.m. Runners meet in front of Seville Quarter for a run around downtown Pensacola. Free pasta and drink specials after the run at Fast Eddie's. Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. sevillequarter.com

CULTURES COOK: GNOCCHI, ITALY’S DUMPLING 6-8 p.m. $35. Pensacola Cooks

Kitchen, 3670 Barrancas Ave. pensacolacooks.rezclick.com

BALLROOM DANCE LESSONS 6:30-8 p.m. $10. Waltz, Foxtrot, Tango, and more.

Professional dance instruction for all skill levels. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd.

503-1123. dancecraftfl.com HIP-HOP DANCE LESSONS 8-9 p.m. $10.

Learn hip-hop moves from a professional instructor. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. 503-1123. dancecraftfl.com

TUESDAY 3.14

TOUR OF TABLES 5-7 p.m. $10. Pensacola Gar-

den Center, 1850 N. 9th Ave,

COMPLEMENTARY WINE TASTING 5-7 p.m.

SoGourmet, 407-D S. Palafox. sogourmetpensacola.com FUNKY YOGA FLOW 6-7 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org COUNTRY DANCE LESSONS 6:30 p.m. $10.

Country Two Step, East Coast Swing, Competition Choreography and more. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. 503-1123 dancecraftfl.com MEDITATION /PRANIC HEALING 7:15-8:30 p.m.

Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org TUNESDAY SOUND CAFE 7:30 p.m. Enjoy a cup of coffee or tea and tunes from the baby grand piano. Pensacola Library lobby, 239 North Spring St.

Pensacola Garden Center, 1850 N. 9th Ave.

COOKING WITH CHEF IRV MILLER 5 and 7:30

p.m. $45. A Taste of Louisiana. Jackson’s Steakhouse, 400 S. Palafox. jacksonsrestaurant.com VINO MAGNIFICO 5:30 p.m. $10. V. Paul's Italian Ristorante, 29 S. Palafox. impact100pensacola.org CULTURES COOK: PAELLA 6-8 p.m. $35.

Pensacola Cooks Kitchen, 3670 Barrancas Ave. pensacolacooks.rezclick.com RESTORATIVE YOGA 6-7 p.m. Free.

Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org WATERBOYZ SLOW SKATE 6-7 p.m. Every Wednesday. Skate starts and ends at Waterboyz, 380 N. 9th Ave. waterboyz.com SWING DANCE LESSONS AND PARTY 6:3010 p.m. $5-$10. Professional west coast swing instruction for all levels. DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. 503-1123. dancecraftfl.com CASABLANCA 7 p.m. $5. The Rex Theatre, 18 N. Palafox. pensacolacinemaart.com MEDITATION 7:15-8:30 p.m. Free. Ever'man Educational Center, 327 W. Garden St. everman.org FREE DANCE LESSONS 8-8:30 p.m. Free beginner west coast swing dance lesson.

DanceCraft, 8618 Pensacola Blvd. 503-1123. dancecraftfl.com

WEDNESDAY 3.15

TOURS OF TABLES LUNCHEON 11 a.m. $20.

for more listings visit inweekly.net

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We are reviewing these cases now at no cost to you. If you have a 2009-2015 Volkswagen diesel or certain 2014-2015 Porsche or Audi diesels, we would be happy to talk to you about your potential claim. Call us now to discuss how you can seek justice for this misrepresentation to you, the innocent consumer.

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inweekly.net

news of the weird EXPLOITING VILLAINS In February, two teams of South Korean researchers announced cancer-fighting breakthroughs —by taking lessons from how two of medicine's most vexing, destructive organisms (diarrhea-causing salmonella bacteria and the rabies virus) can access often-unconquerable cancer cells. In journal articles, biologist Jung-joon Min of Chonnam National University described how his team "weaponized" a cancer-fighting invader cell with salmonella to stir up more-robust immune responses, and nanoparticle expert Yu Seok Youn's Sungkyunkwan University team coated immunizing cells with the rabies protein (since the rabies virus is remarkably successful at invading healthy cells) to reach brain tumors.

NEWS THAT SOUNDS LIKE A JOKE ExColombo family mobster and accused hitman "Tommy Shots" Gioeli, 64, recently filed a federal court lawsuit over a 2013 injury at the Metropolitan Detention Center in New York City. He fell and broke a kneecap while playing ping-pong (allegedly because of water on the floor), awaiting sentencing for conspiracy to commit murder. The New York Post also noted that the "portly" Gioeli, who was later sentenced to 18 years, was quite a sight at trial, carrying his "man purse" each day.

GREAT ART! French artist Abraham Poincheval told reporters in February that in his upcoming "performance," he will entomb himself for a week in a limestone boulder at a Paris museum and then, at the conclusion, sit on a dozen bird eggs until they hatch—"an inner journey," he said, "to find out what the world is." (He apparently failed to learn that from previous efforts, such as the two weeks he spent inside a stuffed bear or his time on the Rhone River inside a giant corked bottle.) He told reporters the super-snug tomb has been thoroughly accessorized, providing for breathing, eating, heart monitor and emergency phone—except, they noted, nothing on exactly how toileting will be handled.

by Chuck Shepherd

THE JOB OF THE RESEARCHER A National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration "bioacoustic research" team recently reported recording and listening to about 2 million underwater sounds made over a four-month period by various species of dolphins ("whistles," echolocation "clicks," and "burst pulses") and can, they believe, distinguish the sounds to match them to a particular dolphin species (among the five most prevalent)—with 84 percent accuracy. The team built a computer algorithm to also make estimating dolphin populations much easier.

THE CONTINUING CRISIS Compelling Explanations: (1) Oklahoma state Rep. Justin Humphrey, justifying his proposed bill to require a woman seeking an abortion to first identify the father, told a reporter in February that the father's permission is crucial because, after all, the woman is basically a "host" who "invited that (fetus) in." (2) After the North Dakota House of Representatives voted yet again in January to retain the state's Sunday-closing "blue laws," Rep. Bernie Satrom explained to a reporter: "Spending time with your wife, your husband, making him breakfast, bringing it to him in bed" is better than going shopping.

LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATORS In a first-person profile for the Chicago Tribune in February, marketing consultant Peter Bender, 28, recalled how he worked to maximize his knowledge of the products of company client Hanes—and not just the flagship Hanes underwear but its Playtex and Maidenform brands. In an "empathy" exercise, Bender wore bras for three days (a sports bra, an underwire and a lacy one)—fitted at size 34A (or "less than A," he said). "These things are difficult," he wrote on a company blog.

"The lacy one," especially, was "itchy." {in}

From Universal Press Syndicate Chuck Shepherd’s News Of The Weird © 2015 Chuck Shepherd

Send your weird news to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 or weirdnews@earthlink.net, or go to newsoftheweird.com

March 9, 2017

19

Independent News | March 9, 2017 | inweekly.net