May 9 2013 Issue

“This is a huge win for Pensacola.”

“We are a very artsy community.”

“It isn’t very often that the word 'beefy' comes to mind to describe a synth line.”

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Independent News | May 9, 2013 | Volume 14 | Number 20 | inweekly.net

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production manager Joani Delezen art director Samantha Crooke publisher & editor Rick Outzen

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staff writer Jessica Forbes

Jeremy Morrison contributing writers Joani Delezen, Hana Frenette, Brett Hutchins, Sarah McCartan,

Kate Peterson, Chuck Shepherd intern Victoria Sharp contact us 438.8115

inweekly.net

winners & losers Lorenzo Aguilar

Engineering Construction Environmental Architecture

winners

losers

LORENZO AGUILAR The 2013 IN Rising Star and Team Anytime Fitness-Downtown Pensacola raised the most contributions for the Relay for Life in Gulf Breeze. The team raised $11, 386 as a team and Aguilar brought in the most funds raised individually for the entire event at $4,244.

NRA The National Rifle Association kicked

off its annual convention in Houston with a speech from its incoming president James Porter in which he declared the organization was in "culture war" with those wanting to pass gun control legislation.

Really?

Now we are also able to bring best practices from project experience in the most vibrant markets in the world.

EMILY SIMON The kindergarten teacher

JEB BUSH The former Florida governor and

We’re Atkins. What can we do for you today?

at West Navarre Primary School has been named the Santa Rosa Rookie of the Year 2013. She was selected from a field of 32 educators with three or less years of teaching experience who were honored at this event.

The Gulf Breeze Area Chamber of Commerce Sara Caudell Scholarship was matched by a donation left by the late Mrs. Jo Nutt, in memory of her deceased children, to award Simon with a $1,000 scholarship.

WEST FLORIDA LITERARY FEDERATION Florida Humanities Council has

awarded Pensacola’s West Florida Literary Federation a $15,000 grant to bring noted scholar-poet-performer Kwame Dawes to Pensacola for “Art in Motion: From the Gallery to the Theatre.” An Emmy winner and prize-winning poet, Dawes is currently the Glenna Luschei Editor of Prairie Schooner at the University of Nebraska, where he is a Chancellor's Professor of English. He will perform in Pensacola on Oct. 24.

his Foundation for Florida’s Future fought hard for the “parent trigger” bill, only to see the Florida Senate kill it with a 20-20 vote.

Bush and other pro-charter groups wanted the bill because it would have allowed parents to vote to close failing schools or convert them to charter schools. Bush was no match for the soccer moms and PTAs across the state.

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outtakes

by Rick Outzen

RUSH TO JUDGMENT Sheriff David Morgan released on May 1 his proposed budget for next fiscal year. We all knew it was coming because the daily newspaper, interim County Administrator George Touart and some of the county commissioners had already attacked it and started calling the sheriff names before they had seen it.

The sticker shock was huge, $95,057,838—an $18,864,522 million increase over the current budget. The daily didn’t know what was included in the budget, but the goal of Touart and County Commission Chairman Gene Valentino was to kill it before the public ever saw it. And the daily with its long history of fighting with Morgan was a willing helper.

On April 30, the day before the budget was published, the daily published an editorial saying Sheriff Morgan should have defended his budget with their reporter before it was sent to the county, and called the budget that the paper hadn’t seen “excessive” and recommended the commissioners reject it.

The next day columnist Shannon Nickinson doubled down on the paper’s view of Morgan and his budget. She labeled the proposed budget an “outrageous demand.”

Sheriff Morgan needed to act more adult, use his ”big-boy voice” and talk with them about his budget.

Morgan’s proposed budget forces the county to face issues that it doesn’t want to

face. The jail and the disparities in compensation and benefits between the Board of County Commissioners and Sheriff ’s Office have been “cans” that they have kicked forward for years. Morgan has said that can’t happen any longer—at least not on his watch.

For two years, the county has sat on a report that shows the jail is understaffed. This week’s cover story gives a peek into what that means for the men and women who work in that county facility. Somehow they have held the jail together, but at some point the county commissioners need to deal with it.

The cost to properly staff the jail is $6,324,157. The county starts its detention officers at the road prison, which is controlled

by Touart and the commission, two percent higher than what the sheriff ’s office does. To reach parity for sworn personnel, Morgan needs $658,409.

More pay disparities exist and Morgan wants it to stop. He is asking that his employees get the same treatment as the county’s other employees when it comes to getting paid overtime and holidays. The cost is over $8 million.

Morgan isn’t asking for pay raises, just equal treatment for his deputies and other employees. Is this excessive or outrageous?

No, but these are discussion starters for the 2013-14 budget. {in} rick@inweekly.net

Morgan isn’t asking for pay raises, just equal treatment for his deputies and other employees.

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DIFFERENCE MAKER

2013 Cox Inspirational Student Heroes for Escambia County Cox Communications recently recognized 48 students from Escambia County with the Cox Inspirational Student Hero Award during a ceremony at the University of West Florida. Recipients are students who have overcome extreme challenges in life, such as mental or physical disabilities, severe medical conditions, language barriers or family adversity. “Each of the students being honored has shown enduring perseverance, inner strength and courage of character to rise above significant challenges and bring inspiration and encouragement to others,” stated Jacqui Vines, senior vice president and general manager of Cox Southeast. “It is truly my honor to pay tribute to these student heroes.”

Bellview Elementary School Gillian Buckley

Ferry Pass Elementary School Nicholas Crowley

Northview High School Isaiah Williams

Bellview Middle School Jezabelle LeClair

Ferry Pass Middle School Janaizja Worley

O.J. Semmes Elementary School Phillip Straughn

Beulah Elementary School Dylan Vorrasi

Global Learning Academy Zoey Yarber

Oakcrest Elementary School Malyana Jackson

Blue Angels Elementary School Lauchlan McKay

Hellen Caro Elementary School Maximilian High

Pensacola High School Michael Riggs

Bratt Elementary School Brandon Berry

Holm Elementary School Julianna Schwartz

Pine Forest High School Kylie Valin

Brentwood Elementary Magnet School Charles Bryant

J.M. Tate High School Logan Thirtyacre

Pleasant Grove Elementary School Julie Wakefield

Jim Allen Elementary School Dawn Huddle

R.C. Lipscomb Elementary School Joshua Parr

Jim C. Bailey Middle School Victoria Sechrist

Scenic Heights Elementary School Atnoinette Heno

Lincoln Park Elementary School Leilani Pooley

Warrington Elementary School Ja’Daisha Young

Longleaf Elementary School Trinity Morris

Warrington Middle School Jolyeah Williams

McArthur Elementary School Kaila Kelly

Washington High School Victor Nall

Molino Park Elementary School Larry Allie

West Florida High School Joshua Inghram

Myrtle Grove Elementary School Anthony Goodwin

West Pensacola Elementary School Dilon Fountain

N.B. Cook Elementary School Lorna McLendon

Woodham Middle School Ti’Kerrian Boggs

Brown Barge Middle School Gerald Sill Byrneville Elementary School Katelyn Hassebrock C.A. Weis Elementary School Skylar Ford Cordova Park Elementary School Jolan Cunningham Ensley Elementary School Ron’Drickka Edwards Ernest Ward Middle School Daysha Kite Escambia Charter School Eduar Williams Jr. Escambia High School Andrea Overton

Workman Middle School Valeria Salazar

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ANALYSIS: SIX QUESTIONS ON HOUSE DISTRICT 2 RACE support from Pensacola Christian College and the city of Gulf Breeze where he had served as a councilman for 17 years.

Ford beat George Scarborough by 402 votes in the GOP primary. There were two other candidates that split the vote. Ford received only 2,323 votes. The 2013 GOP nomination could be won with as little as 2,000 votes.

Name Recognition Could Win Due to Low Turnout

by Rick Outzen

The Republican primary to decide who will run for Florida House District 2 against Democrat Jeremy Lau is Tuesday, May 14. The Independent News tries to answer six key questions about the race.

1. What areas are included in House District 2 The district was redrawn in 2012. Gone is Pensacola Christian College, replaced by southwest Escambia County. The entire cities of Pensacola and Gulf Breeze are in District 2, plus Pensacola Beach, Warrington, Perdido Key, NAS Pensacola and the Grand Pointe and Oriole Beach areas of south Santa Rosa County.

2. What is the expected turnout for the Republican primary?

The late Clay Ford won the seat in 2007 when it was District 3 thanks to huge

3. Why is this Republican primary important?

Assuming that the Republican Party retains control of the Florida House of Representatives and District 2 elects a Republican, then the winner of this primary will be in line to become Speaker of the House in 2020-22. He will be given a sixteen-month head start on the rest of the class to organize a campaign for the speakership.

4. Who are the candidates?

Ed Gray III is the head of Capital Trust Agency and Gulf Breeze Financial Services.

He has served as mayor of Gulf Breeze, as well as on its city council and the Santa Rosa County School Board.

Mike Hill is a State Farm Insurance agent and the president of the Northwest Florida Tea Party. A graduate of the U.S. Air Force Academy, Hill served 10 years in the Air Force before entering the private sector.

Scott Miller has advised several political campaigns. He has worked as a computer consultant, in the construction-debris trade and now in the medical industry with his father-in-law.

Jack Nobles was a former Pensacola City Councilman for 14 years. His family has lived in Pensacola for six generations.

His professional career was spent with his family’s Horizon Bank, which later merged with what is now Coastal Bank & Trust.

David Radcliffe is an agent with Underwood Anderson & Associates and owns Breeze Mini Storage. He has been active in the youth sports, particularly in Gulf

E r i c D. St e v e n s on

Breeze and at Tiger Point.

Mark Taylor owns Pensacola Insurance Inspectors, Mark Taylor Construction and Pensacola Hair Design. He is the youngest of the candidates, age 32, and was recently appointed to the Community Maritime Park Associates Board of Trustees.

5. What role will geography play in the race?

City of Gulf Breeze, Grand Pointe and Oriole Beach precincts in Santa Rosa County traditionally have solid turnouts for every election. Gray’s name recognition is the strongest with these voters, but Radcliffe and Miller also live in south Santa Rosa County.

Nobles and Taylor live inside the city of Pensacola, and Nobles has a lead in name recognition. The district was drawn so that Pensacola would have a legitimate chance of having its own seat in the Florida House.

Southwest Escambia County is the toss-up area. Hill’s State Farm agency is in Warrington, even though he doesn’t actually live in the district. Escambia County Commissioner Gene Valentino represents that area and has endorsed Miller. Sheriff David Morgan has endorsed Hill. Our guess is Morgan trumps Valentino with the voters. It’s no coincidence that Republicans in this part of the county are receiving telephone polls almost daily.

6. How conservative is District 2?

The most right-wing of the candidates are Hill and Miller, but really all the candidates are conservative Republicans.

That being said, south Santa Rosa County isn’t a Tea Party stronghold. In the 2010 Republican primary, Rick Scott only out polled Bill McCollum in the three precincts by 10 votes. Name recognition means more to these super voters than political dogma.

In 2010, Pensacola native Holly Benson crushed Pam Bondi, who won the statewide race for Florida Attorney General. {in}

Ed Gray, III

ENDORSEMENT: ED GRAY, III Gray is a proven leader with a track record for getting things done.

As Gulf Breeze mayor, he set the city on sound financial footing with the creation of the Gulf Breeze Loan Pool, which has kept the city’s property taxes the lowest in Northwest Florida. While serving on the Santa Rosa School Board, Gray played a key role in making that system one of the finest in the state. His leadership is needed in Tallahassee and would serve him well as a future Speaker of the House.

Plus we also like that Gray has a history of developing practical solutions to problems. He cares more about people than politics or some political ideology. He will listen to his constituents and address their needs before worrying about re-election.

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by Jeremy Morrison

Millions of dollars look to be headed to Florida to fund environmental restoration efforts following the 2010 oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. Much of it is aimed at Pensacola and Escambia County.

“That’s a homerun,” said Escambia County Commission Chairman Gene Valentino.

The Deepwater Horizon Natural Resource Damage Assessment Trustees has proposed $58 million in restoration projects for Florida. The money is coming out of a $1 billion pool that BP previously set aside for early restoration; Florida’s allotment is $100 million.

“We’re committed to restoring the environment and economy that families have relied upon in the Gulf for generations,” said Florida Gov. Rick Scott following the trustees’ announcement.

The biggest chunk of this wave of NRDA money is headed to Pensacola. Approximately $20 million has been proposed for the Florida Gulf Coast Marine Fisheries Hatchery.

“This is a huge win for Pensacola,” said Mayor Ashton Hayward.

The hatchery will be constructed at the Bruce Beach site near the Community Maritime Park. It will consist of a saltwater fish hatchery, an integrated coastal habitat plant production facility and an educational component.

Fish raised at the fishery will be released in areas where populations are depleted.

The project is meant to address the oil spill’s impact on the Gulf’s fishery.

Another project being proposed is the creation of an artificial reef stretching across fi ve counties. Running from Escambia to Franklin, the project has been allocated about $11.4 million. The reef is meant to improve fishing and diving opportunities.

“It’s not just a reef,” explained Escambia County Commissioner Grover Robinson. “It’s a series of reefs. That’s huge!”

To date, just over $11 million worth of Florida’s early restoration money has been put to work. This latest phase is the largest allotment thus far. The proposed projects will go through a public input period this summer before being finalized.

In addition to the fish hatchery and artificial reef, other projects slated for this round of early-restoration dollars include: Pensacola Bay Living Shoreline — Breakwaters will be constructed to stabilize shorelines at Sanders Beach and Project Greeshores Site II on Pensacola Bay. The purpose or the project is to create salt marsh habitat by reducing wave energy, as well as May 9, 2013

by the BP Settlement Facility in variety of business categories, for example: allocated $11 million—will benefit many speSome of our past clients have been approved for payments cies of fish and birds.

Some ofSettlement our past Facility clientsinhave been approved for payments by the BP variety of business categories, for example: Beach Enhancement at Gulf Island by the BP Settlement Facility in variety of business categories, for example: Amusement Seafood National Seashore — This project seeks to Amusement Movie Theatres: Seafood Parks: Restaurants: Movie Theatres: Parks: Restaurants: remove tens of thousands of cubic yards of Amusement Seafood $620,715 $620,715 $2,182,086 $1,522,187 $2,182,086 Movie Theatres: $1,522,187 asphalt fragments and road base material that Parks: Restaurants: $338,961 $338,961 $1,316,238 $1,273,100 $620,715 has been scattered over hundreds of acres $1,316,238 $1,273,100 $2,182,086 $1,522,187 Some of our past clients have been approved for payments Property Real Estate and approximately 11 miles of the Fort Pickens $338,961 Motels:

by Property the BP Settlement Facility in variety of business categories, for example: $1,316,238 $1,273,100 Real Estate Management: Companies: and Santa Rosa areas of Gulf Island National Motels: $1,255,827 $1,746,310 $1,809,528 Management: Companies: Property Real Estate Seashore. The estimated cost is $11 million. $1,213.086 Some of our past clients Motels: have been approved for payments $1,255,827 Amusement Seafood $420,266 $576,331 Management: Companies: Theatres: $1,809,528 Florida Oyster Reef Restoration — Inby the$1,746,310 BP Settlement variety of business categories, for example: Parks:Facility inMovie Restaurants: $1,255,827 Timeshare Construction $1,746,310 $1,809,528 $1,213.086 $620,715 Painting volves placing cultch material over approxiAssociations: Companies: $2,182,086 $1,522,187 $420,266 $576,331 $1,213.086 Contractor: $338,961 $420,266 $576,331 mately 210 acres in an effort to foster oyster $2,027,266 $1,429,390 $1,316,238 $1,273,100 Amusement Seafood Timeshare Construction Movie Theatres: $415,000 Parks: Restaurants: Timeshare Construction $1,772,351 $635,045 Property Real Estate colonization in the Pensacola Bay system in Painting Motels: Associations: Companies: $620,715 Painting Management: Companies: Associations: Companies: $2,182,086 $1,522,187 Escambia and Santa Rosa counties, the St. Contractor: Dentist Offices: $1,255,827 Contractor: Bait & Tackle $338,961 $1,746,310 $1,809,528 $2,027,266 $1,429,390 Chiropractor: $1,316,238 $1,273,100 $2,027,266 $1,429,390 Andrew Bay system in Bay County and the Shop: $354,390 $1,213.086 $415,000 $415,000 $420,266 $576,331 $133,394 Property Real Estate Apalachicola Bay system in Franklin County. $1,772,351 $635,045 $1,772,351 $635,045 $1,416,516 $130,126 Motels: Timeshare Construction Management: Companies: The estimated cost is $5.4 million.

Painting $1,255,827 Associations: Companies: Retail Store: $1,746,310 $1,809,528 Dentist Offices: Contractor: BaitBoat & Tackle Tackle Dentist Offices: Dealership: Ferry Boat Access to Fort Pickens Bait & $2,027,266 $1,429,390 Chiropractor: $1,213.086 Home Interior: $942,340 Chiropractor: $420,266 $576,331 Shop: $415,000 $354,390 $993,312 — This project provides $4 million for the Shop: Convenience $1,772,351 $635,045 $354,390 $480,417 $133,394 Timeshare Construction Marina: $1,416,516 $133,394 $130,126 purchasing of two ferry boats to be used to Store: Painting $334,503 Associations: Companies: $1,416,516 Dentist Offices: $130,126 $577,920 Bait & Tackle Contractor: Chiropractor: $743,873 transport visitors to Fort Pickens. $2,027,266 $1,429,390 Shop: Retail Store: $354,390 The above amounts are stated before the deductions for fees and costs of attorneys and accountants. $415,000 $133,394 Boat Dealership: Scallop Enhancement in Panhandle — Retail Store: Home $1,416,516 $1,772,351 $635,045 Interior: $130,126 $942,340 Boat Dealership: This project is meant to enhance naturally $993,312 Home Interior: Convenience $942,340 $480,417 Retail Store: Dentist Offices: Bait &Dealership: Tackle Marina: occurring bay scallop populations in the Boat $993,312 Chiropractor: Home Interior: Store: Convenience $942,340 Shop: $480,417 $334,503 $354,390 bays of Escambia, Santa Rosa, Okaloosa, $993,312 $577,920 Marina: Convenience Our law firm will provide a free evaluation to see if your $133,394 business qualifies for the $480,417 $1,416,516 $743,873 Store: $130,126 Marina: Walton, Bay, Gulf and Franklin counties. The BP The Oil above Spill Settlement.

You paytheno fees orfor costs unless we makeand a$334,503 recovery for you.

Store: $334,503 $577,920 amounts are stated before deductions fees and costs of attorneys accountants. $577,920 estimated cost is $3 million.

Retail Store: $743,873 $743,873 Boat Dealership: The above amounts are stated before the deductions for fees costs of attorneys accountants.

Home Florida Bay Seagrass Recovery Project The above amounts are stated before the deductions for and fees and costs Interior: ofand attorneys and accountants. $942,340 $993,312 Convenience $480,417 — Focuses on the restoration of seagrass in Marina: Store: $334,503 Gulf, Franklin and Bay counties. Estimated $577,920 $743,873 Our law firm will provide a free evaluation to see if your business qualifies for the cost is $2.7 million.

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Big Lagoon State Park Boat Ramp Im- BP Oil Spill BP Oil Spill Settlement. You pay no fees or costs unless we make a recovery for you. provement — This Escambia County projectOur law firm will provide a free evaluation to see if your business qualifies for the involves adding an additional lane to the boat BP Oil Spill Settlement. You pay no fees or costs unless we make a recovery for yo ramp, expanding boat trailer parking, improvOur law firm will provide a free evaluation to see if your business qualifies for the ing traffic circulation and the construction of BP Oil Spill Settlement. You pay no fees or costs unless we make a recovery for you. a new restroom facility. The estimated cost is Pensacola, FL Call 435-7000 $1.5 million.

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Pensacola, FL CallCall 435-7000 Shell Point Beach Nourishment — InPensacola, FL 435-7000 volves placing 15,000 cubic yards of dredged sand on Wakulla County’s Shell Point Beach at a cost of $880,000.

Florida Cat Point Living Shoreline Project — This project involves constructing a breakwater to stabilize St. George Sound in Franklin County. Estimated cost is $800,000.

Perdido Key Boardwalk Improvements — This project will replace the six boardwalks leading to the beach in an effort to improve visitor access. Estimated cost is $600,000.

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inweekly.net

feature story

photos by Samantha Crooke

The sound of a jail door closing is deafening, yet hushed. A noise observed in silence—the steel sliding and colliding against a concrete wall, the severity of mechanical clicks that assure freedom has slipped out of the room.

“Neat sound when those doors shut,” notes one of the supervisors at the Escambia County Jail.

The supervisor follows Colonel Brett Whitlock through the maze. Past the visitation windows and toward the infirmary.

The Escambia County Jail is lit like a horror movie, sometimes dim and others stark. Shadows lose their bearings walking down the hall. Faces press against glass windows in heavy steel doors, an inmate begins to caterwaul.

“Unstable people,” Whitlock said.

“To say the least,” agrees a younger officer, “unstable people.”

Escambia County Sheriff David Morgan gave Whitlock the go-ahead to give the jail tour. He wanted the facility head to point out the jail’s wear and tear, and allow his employees to speak about the impacts of current staffing levels.

“Manpower shortage is both an officer and inmate safety issue,” Morgan had said in his office.

A couple of days earlier, the sheriff had turned in his proposed budget. Coming in nearly $19 million higher than last year, the budget was blowing some minds down at the Escambia County administrative offices.

“I appreciate he’s got problems,” said Escambia County Commissioner Grover Robinson. “But we’ve all got problems. We don’t got the money.”

Not one to shy away from budgetary disputes, the sheriff doesn’t appear to be flinching. He said he expects to have his budget fulfilled—intending to not only increase staffing levels, but also increase pay—and cites past studies, as well as an ongoing federal investigation to make his case.

May 9, 2013

“If you refuse to do this and we have an unexplained death in the jail, what do you think is gonna happen?” Morgan said. “The Department of Justice will be all over you and they’ll sue the county until their eyes bleed.”

“We’re stunned on the amount,” Valentino explained. “No sheriff has come forward with such a ridiculous request as this.”

Morgan is requesting a $95,057,838.

That’s an $18,864,522 increase.

Escambia County Sheriff David Morgan

RECEPTION OF THE ‘RIDICULOUS’ Escambia County Commission Chairman Gene Valentino stood out front of the cigar store across from the county administrative complex. The sheriff had just dropped off his budget and the chairman was describing his commission as “hopping mad.”

“Listen to 1620 in the morning,” he advised.

Valentino took to the AM airwaves the next day. Later in the afternoon, he would elaborate.

“Everybody has a right to request whatever they want for the budget,” said Commissioner Lumon May. “But requesting it and getting it are two different things.”

The sheriff is visibly irritated by such talk. In his view, there is black and there is white, there is right and there is wrong— why is everyone but him babbling gibberish?

“I keep expecting the clocks to start dripping off the table and melting off the wall,” Morgan said, describing Valentino’s radio interview as “another Salvador Dali moment.”

“The Department of Justice will be all over you and they’ll sue the county until their eyes bleed.”

Sheriff David Morgan

The sheriff is apparently shocked that his budget request is being met with such resistance. His public information officer, Sena Maddison, said that most counties approach a sheriff’s budget with a how-muchdo-you-need-here-you-go attitude.

“I can tell you, ‘We don’t have the money’ is the wrong answer,” said Morgan.

The sheriff defends his budget proposal as necessary to address longstanding issues at the sheriff ’s office and the jail facilities under its control. He wants to hire more staff for the jail and points to pay discrepancies between his officers and those working at the county’s Road Prison. He’s also aiming to pay sheriff office employees the same holiday and overtime benefits as county employees.

The sheriff ’s budget request includes an additional $6,324,157 for the hiring of 95 new employees for the jail; an estimated $4,340,002 for overtime and $3,952,930 for holiday pay; and $658,409 in order to offer starting detention deputies a two percent pay increase.

“It’s not numbers we just pulled out of the air,” Morgan said. “They’ve taken the position that the budget is outrageous.

Based on what?”

The commissioners raise their objections to the sheriff’s request against the backdrop of an increasingly crunched county budget. At more than $76 million last year, the sheriff’s budget was already the largest chunk of the general fund.

“If you cut another $18 million out of the county budget,” explained Robinson, “we don’t have anywhere to go.”

With the exception of the sheriff’s office, the county’s other four constitutional offices saw decreases in their budgets last year. Morgan’s budget stayed the same, although he did eat an expiring $1.2 million grant used to hire additional officers.

“They don’t have my job,” Morgan said, brushing aside comparisons to other constitutional county budgets. “Law enforcement can’t be compared to other county jobs.”

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Commissioner Wilson Robertson said he doubted the county could shoulder any budget increases this year.

“If the sheriff was asking for $2 or $3 million, I don’t think we could do it,” he said.

“Anything in the magnitude he’s asking is ridiculous. Fact of business, I don’t think we can give any increases this year.”

“I was a tug boat captain,” Whitlock lost himself for a moment in time.

The main jail—built in two phases, one in 1982, and the next as a result of a lawsuit in 1984—is an aging beast. It is constant upkeep and repairs.

“I don’t know the last time you had toilet water fall on your head,” he said, “but it’s not a nice thing.”

But the sheriff ’s proposed budget does not include funds for jail restorations. Insofar as operations at the jail are concerned, the

DOG-TIRED

Inside the control room at the end of the hallway, there are two detention deputies.

They are charged with overseeing the main jail’s infirmary.

Both agree that the jail could benefit from additional staff—“we’re definitely shorthanded”—and talk about how no one can take time off and everyone is always thinking of quitting or retiring.

“When I go home at night, I’m no use to anyone, not even myself. I’m just that dogtired,” said one of the deputies. “It’s like one person doing three jobs.”

“That’s just the way it is,” said the other deputy. “—I’ve seen worse, I used to work at a state prison.”

Continuing on through the jail, Whitlock pointed out water-stained ceiling tiles and explained how the locking mechanisms on the doors were “worn out.” In the facility’s records room, a blue tarp shields shelves of files from leaks overhead.

“This is the jail,” Whitlock said. “What you’ve got here is 1982.”

Maddison noted she was in high school when the jail was built. A young deputy laughed and said she had been a toddler.

“If they decide to go nuts?” she asked.

On each floor of the jail is a “pod” of cells. A detention deputy watches over the collection of cells from a central room located in the middle. Another deputy—an escort—is ideally there too, but is often unavailable due to a staffing shortage.

“Every day I start short,” said one supervisor. “When I say short, I’ve got posts that aren’t being manned.”

The supervisor said the shortage contributes to an overall tense environment.

“The officers are stressed out,” he said, “they pass that on to the prisoners.”

THE IOU MOU

View from a cell pod inside the Escambia County Jail.

The county is in the process of planning for upgrades to the main jail. They plan to pump about $8 million into the effort.

“That’s going to go a long way,” Whitlock said. “We’re hoping to overhaul our doors and plumbing.”

Plumbing is a major concern at the jail.

One deputy recalled opening an elevator door recently, only to be deluged with sewage.

budget primarily addresses staffing concerns.

This is a concern shared by staff and supervisors at the jail.

“I’ve got to have a certain amount of people here,” said one supervisor. “Beyond that, it becomes dangerous.”

One jail deputy described the process involved in escorting inmates to the recreation yard. At a ratio of 90 to six, she said, it proves an unnerving trek down the stairwell.

The problems at the Escambia County Jail are nothing new. Two county studies point to infrastructure and staffing issues.

About ten years ago, population levels had reached a point well beyond the seams.

The number of inmates being housed between the main jail and central booking, which have a combined capacity of 1, 456, hovered just below a couple of thousand.

“We were grossly overpopulated,” said Sheriff Morgan. “We had two on bunks and one on the floor.”

“Way over,” said Whitlock. “In 2007, we almost hit 2,000.”

Over at the main jail, a 22-year detention deputy—“I might’ve been here a minute”—recalled the peak years.

“We were so overcrowded at one point,” he said. “I would say 2003, 2004 it was just too many folks. You couldn’t put ‘em anywhere. People were sleeping on the floor.”

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These days, the jail population is smaller. In early May, the population stands at 1,364—that’s 634 in central booking and 730 in the main jail.

“They don’t overbook us anymore,” said the deputy.

In 2011, the National Center for State Courts and Justice Concepts Incorporated provided Escambia County with a study— commissioned in FY2007-2008—that examined the area’s overall justice system.

As for the jail, the study noted the facility’s structural needs and also recommended that 95 new detention staff members be brought aboard; a more recent study in 2012 related to planned improvements at the jail and also noted the staffing needs, citing the previous report.

It was with this 2011 report that Morgan was armed when he approached the county in March about some “very significant issues regarding the operation and funding of the Escambia County Jail.” He pointed also to the U.S. Department of Justice investigation, begun in 2009, into jail operations and suggested a discussion be held concerning the 1994 memorandum that threw operation of the jail to the sheriff.

“I’m not required to run the jail,” Morgan said, following the release of his budget request. “What I want the county to understand, you can’t give me this facility and then underfund it.”

In a March 14 letter to the county, Gerry Champagne, Morgan’s general counsel, suggested that the 1994 MOU was obsolete and said the agreement should be renegotiated.

The attorney proposed a new MOU, which allows Morgan to withdraw from overseeing the jail if the county fails to meet certain thresholds tied to funding, staffing, pay and infrastructure improvements. The agreement would need to be renewed annually.

Valentino has said he felt “threatened”

by Morgan’s approach. Escambia County Interim Administrator George Touart has called the sheriff’s correspondence a “demand letter.”

County staff has also disputed portions of the 2011 study.

Describing the report as containing “material deficiencies,” the county has withheld $35,304 of a total $242,362 contract.

“We don’t support the study,” said Valentino. “We think the study’s incomplete.

We don’t understand why the sheriff would be using such an outdated document.”

The 2011 study assessed the entirety of the county’s justice system. It looked at the domain under the sheriff’s charge, as well as the judiciary and the county’s Department of Community Corrections, which includes aspects such as pretrial services and the Road Prison.

Concerns raised by the county pertained entirely to the study’s findings related to this latter realm, the diversion realm.

The report suggested that the involved parties—the sheriff’s office, the offices of the state attorney and public defenders, and the county— “must commit to improving the delivery of services at the front end of the criminal justice system.”

“An effective Pretrial Services function can save counties millions of dollars annually,” the report’s authors wrote to county in response to staff’s concerns. “Without question, the pretrial services’ role is catalytic to the process.

JCI has assisted many jurisdictions in the improvement of the ‘front end’ processes, those appreciating millions of dollars through the demand reduction of jail bed days, significantly diminishing the numbers of individuals incarcerated, and increasing the community based supervision options the latter a fraction of the jail per diems.”

County staff contends that pretrial issues raised by the report were either off base, or out of date, with the county supposedly having already addressed the concerns noted in the report. Escambia has requested that the company revise its report prior to being paid in full; the consulting company, meanwhile, has stuck to its original recommendations concerning the front-end.

“Every day I start short.

When I say short, I’ve got posts that aren’t being manned.”

Jail Supervisor

In an April 12 letter to the sheriff, Touart explained the county’s position on the 2011 report.

“The fact that JCI and NCSC have made material errors regarding their evaluation of County Pretrial Services is a completely separate issue from their evaluation of other aspects of the court system, jail operations, inmate population and staffing needs,” Touart wrote.

NO APPETITE FOR TAX

Cut to the nine of spades, a deck of cards sat on a metal table, surrounded by metal stools, all attached to the floor. From behind bars, inmates either watch or ignore a community television tuned to reruns of “American Dad.” In a corner cell, an inmate wearing blue shorts and a white t-shirt—purchased at the jail in an effort to escape the standard issued, and free, jumpsuits—smiles and holds out a sketching from between his bars, giving his art a momentary breath of freedom.

“It’s a tribal cross, with a Celtic weave,” the inmate explains his drawing. “Threedimensional.”

Whitlock leads the tour on. Into Phase II, pass the break room—“nobody’s in there on break because nobody ever gets to take their break”—and into the elevator.

After an uncomfortably long pause, Whitlock looks at the supervisor manning the elevator buttons. The man pushes the buttons to no avail, and then radios for assistance.

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“Elevator is stuck on Phase II, if you can help us out,” he said, before shrugging off the delay. “It happens a lot. This week, I’d say 10 times.”

In a few minutes, the elevator doors open and Whitlock heads for the stairs.

“You put miles on your boots,” he said, “it’s not a sit-down job.”

Whitlock has put a lot of correctional facility miles on his boots since his tugboat days. He mentions along the tour that it happens to be the day of his 20th anniversary.

That means Whitlock’s been here quite a while. Since before they shot the guy off the rec-yard wall as he tried to escape.

Since before the 1994 memorandum that placed the jail under the sheriff’s authority.

Commissioner Robertson’s been around since then too.

“I was on the board several terms when we ran the jail,” he recalled. “It was somewhat of a nightmare.”

The commissioner knows it’s always a possibility that the county could again tend to the facility.

“He may dump the jail back on us, I don’t know,” Robertson said.

Morgan has said he doesn’t want to see the jail facilities go back under the county.

He describes the jail as “appropriately a law enforcement function.”

The sheriff—who rallied voters with a battle cry of fiscal conservatism—sidestepped the notion of raising taxes to generate the funds necessary to meet his budget request. He said he “wouldn’t tell the county how to do their job.”

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“I wouldn’t tell the county how to get the money,” he continued. “I would hope, as in any plan, that everything is on the table.”

The mention of a possible tax increase tends to make county commissioners queasy. No one’s got an appetite.

“And I think the other commissioners feel the same way.”

WAGE WAR

Heading over to the main jail, Whitlock walked down the sidewalk and to his Impala in the parking lot.

Colonel Brett Whitlock stands outside the main Escambia County Jail, built in 1982.

“I wouldn’t vote for that, of course,” Robertson said, explaining that any such tax would need to be put before the voters.

Chairman Valentino is on the same page.

“The last thing I want to be talking about right now is tax increases,” he said.

“You don’t have a reserved parking space?” joked Maddison. “I bet Gordon Pike does.”

This appears to be a popular budgetbased game at the sheriff’s office. Earlier, Maddison and Morgan had played a round.

The sheriff had asked his PIO her salary, and then compared it to the higher pay of the county’s main PIO. This comparison—holding up his highest 50 paid employees to the 50-highest paid of the county administration—is what Morgan points to when defending his intention to up salaries at the sheriff’s office.

“The county has told me—every year I’ve been in office—has told me that all county employees are important,” Morgan said.

A chunk of Morgan’s proposed budget increase is to cover pay raises. He is asking for almost $9 million dollars to fund the two percent pay raise for starting detention deputies and to be able to pay sheriff employees on par with county employees when it comes to overtime and holiday.

The sheriff is also considering raises for several upper level employees. He is looking at between five and 15 percent hikes— called incentive pay—for several senior commanders, commanders and colonels.

“My people are grossly underpaid,” Morgan said. “There is no parity.”

Commissioner Robertson said he believed there were pay disparities, but suggested they pertained to some employees being “overpaid for the work they’re doing.”

“There needs to be a disparity study if you’re going to start giving raises,” the commissioner said.

Chairman Valentino wondered, “What amounts of cash they’re sitting on that the county commission may or may not know about.” He also said officials might need to reassess Escambia’s justice system as a whole.

inweekly.net

“It’s clear to me that we must think out of the box and be more creative about the matters at the jail and the corrections system in general,” Valentino said.

RESOLVED ROBOTS

Depending on whom you ask, Sheriff Morgan is either a bona-fide 10-gallon hat hero or the most arrogant man to waltz into town since Andrew Jackson. Maybe both, or neither.

Whatever he is, he puts a bur under some people’s saddles.

“People want you to jump,” said Commissioner Robinson. “They want to force you into making a decision today. That’s not good government.”

Morgan sees it differently. He feels his needs are non-negotiable. He has threatened to take his budget to Tallahassee in hopes of having Gov. Rick Scott resolve the dispute.

“We’re preparing a budget to go to the governor,” Morgan said. “I’m not going to allow the county to play poker with me anymore.”

This tact seems abrasive to Robinson.

“Everybody’s trying to jump to a decision,” he cautioned. “This is a process. We don’t have to come up with anything until August. That’s a long way away.”

But Morgan sees it as his duty to demand the funds he feels are necessary to maintain the facilities under his charge. To dispute that derails the conversation.

He points to the ongoing DOJ investigation, and suggests that county officials

work with the feds to hammer out a “strategic get-well plan” to address issues in the local justice system.

“It’s fun to politically attach my face and name to this ‘outrageous’ budget,” Morgan said. “I’m the bearer of bad news. You know, the sheriff didn’t wake up Monday morning and say, ‘Let’s inflame the county.’”

And while the sheriff shows no signs of entertaining any concessions to his requested needs, his staff understands that their work will continue regardless of who prevails budget-wise.

“We do what we have to do,” Whitlock said. “They are really good at being creative in their staffing.”

In the jail infirmary, the detention deputy agrees.

“I mean, we’ve done got this far,” he said.

Taking a break from his crackers and can of chicken salad, another jail employee gives a nod to Morgan—“I give ‘em his due, he looks out for us”—but said he also recognizes the county’s continued budget constraints—“this year coming up, who knows?”—and understands the commissioners’ position.

“That’s why I don’t blame them,” he said. “They’re doing what they got to do.

Looking out for the whole county, not just here.”

As the tour ends outside the main jail, Whitlock stands in the shadow of a magnolia tree and sums it up.

We’re trying to do with what we’ve got,” he said. “I think the officers know that, but they’re getting tired. They’re not robots.”

MAY DAY, MAY DAY

This discussion is exhausting to Commissioner May. A raging race routed the wrong direction.

“Let’s talk about the real deal. Why aren’t we putting money into prevention,” the commissioner said.

“I’m tired of putting money into expansion and capital outlay and jails. When are we going to put money into prevention?”

May’s District 3 has a high percentage of African-Americans. It’s a population that bears the disproportionate brunt of a flawed justice system. The commissioner pointed out that incarceration makes it

“That’s why I don’t blame them.

They’re doing what they got to do.

Looking out for the whole county, not just here.”

Colonel Brett Whitlock

increasingly difficult for individuals to pull their lives together after serving their time.

“I represent people on the ground with a record, who are looking for a job,” May said.

“I want to stop people from going to jail.”

The commissioner said he thought funds should be directed to the front end of the justice system—“it’s much cheaper on the front end”—with community efforts being made to address the “root of the problem.” This point was also noted in the studies assessing the local justice system.

“We need to begin to have a discussion with the sheriff, the chamber of commerce and the school board—how do we curb incarceration?” May said. “Strategically looking at the problem, holistically looking at the problem is how we’re going to solve it.”

This is an expansive conversation that ripples throughout the layers of the local community. It’s a question without easy answers. Too elusive to find solutions in budgetary math.

And this is a conversation that will go on and on, certainly beyond this year’s budget season. But maybe that’s a good place for such a conversation to take firm root.

“That’s what my discussion is, my discussion is, ‘How do we begin creating opportunities for the least of them?’

That’ll be the discussion that I want to have. It’s much deeper than budgetary constraints,” May explained. “Do we really want to change? Or do we want to accept this crime, this blight as standard? I refuse to sit down and accept it.” {in}

CO N G RAT U L AT I O N S TO A T R U E S E R VA N T L E A D E R .

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WEEK OF MAY 9-16

Arts & Entertainment art , f ilm, music, stage, books and other signs of civilization...

Fine Arts for All

by Lilia Del Bosque Oakey Whitehouse

photo courtesy of Pensacola Museum of Art The festival also exposes the community to artists that do not showcase their work in Pensacola often.

There are also visiting artists that enjoy Pensacola and make Art in the Park a tradition of their own.

“We have a handful of artists that have done the festival before,” said Kendall. “They tell us that they love Art in the Park and want to be a part of it year after year.”

The juried art show will be judged by two local judges: Krist L. Lien, Head of the Art Department at Pensacola State College, and Rachael Pongetti, Adjunct Professor of Photography at Pensacola State College and the University of West Florida. Best in Show at the festival will be awarded $1,500 and eight other awards will also be presented. There will also be a silent auction of work donated by the artists.

Proceeds from the silent auction will be used to fund scholarships for children for the museum’s Summer Art Camp.

Art in the Park is the perfect place to enjoy a wonderful spring day and celebrate the many working artists that make Pensacola a unique cultural experience. {in}

“It’s great that the museum has an event that brings the art outside of the walls of the museum.”

Stacy Kendall Skip the flowers, bubble bath and other typical Mother’s Day gifts and treat your mother to a piece of original artwork at the Pensacola Museum of Art’s 11th Annual Art in the Park.

The annual art festival features artists from across the United States and one international artist. The festival features work in a wide array of mediums including clay, jewelry, metal works, photography, and oil and acrylics, among others. The festival will also feature music, kid’s art, and, for the first time, a raffle with the prize of $500 worth of art from the vendors.

The festival is also an opportunity for the museum to showcase fine art in the community.

“A big part of the museum’s mission is to provide cultural experiences for the community,” said Stacy Kendall, director of marketing for the Pensacola Museum of Art. “It’s great that the museum has an event that brings the art outside of the walls of the museum.”

“The community of Pensacola enjoys a cultural scene,” said Lori Storey, the co-chair for the annual event. She believes that Art in the Park helps showcase Pensacola and our surprisingly thriving cultural presence.

Despite being a smaller city, Pensacola has an art scene that rivals that of many larger cities in the state.

“We have all five cultural experiences: the ballet, opera, symphony, theater and museum. There are only two cities in the whole state of Florida that have all five cultural experiences,” explained Storey. “We are a very artsy community that maybe people don’t know about.”

Pensacola values cultural experience and Storey is proud to be offering a fine arts experience for the community.

“With Greater Gulf Coast Art Fest in November, we have two art shows as a bookend to the summer,” said Storey. “We are giving the community the opportunity for fine arts twice a year.”

“I think it shows a variety of artists,” said Storey. “Many of these artists don’t present at the Greater Gulf Coast Art Fest. To me, it is great to give the community an opportunity to show artists that are only showing in Pensacola once a year.”

It is also important to bring fine arts out of the museums and into the community.

“We are showing people that have really devoted a lot of time and money to hone their skill,” said Kendall.

Kendall believes that the festival also brings awareness to working artists.

“A lot of times museums show artists that are no longer living— WHEN: 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, May 11 and they are really great and imand Sunday, May 12 portant—but we have a lot of great WHERE: Seville Square working artists, especially in our COST: Free community here,” said Kendall. “We DETAILS: pensacolamuseumofart.org also want to give local artists the opportunity to share their work.”

ART IN THE PARK

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happenings

Geeking Out for ‘Gatsby’ with a script by Francis Ford Coppola. It’s totally worth Netflixing.

FALL IN LOVE WITH THE COMPLETELY BADASS SOUNDTRACK

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It’s been almost a year since the first trailer debuted—in all its roaring ‘20s, Jay-Z/Kanye “No Church in the Wild” sampling glory. Since then we’ve been counting down the days until the latest adaptation of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby” hits theaters.

Directed by Baz Luhrmann and starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Tobey Maguire and Carey Mulligan, the film promises to be nothing short of a visual extravaganza.

And a musical one too. Thankfully, the wait is almost over—the film is out this Friday, May 10. Here’s what’s on our “to do” list before we go see how great the “The Great Gatsby” really is:

REREAD (OR READ) THE BOOK

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HISTORIC PENSACOLA TROLLEY TOUR 10 a.m. & 2 p.m. Pensacola Visitor Center, 1401 E. Gregory St. 941-2876 or beachbumtrolley.com.

‘LOST AND FOUND’ 10 a.m. Through May 18.

Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. Palafox. 429-9100 or bluemorninggallery.com.

PLAY HAPPY HOUR 4 p.m. Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or iplaypensacola.com.

WINE TASTING AT AWM 5 p.m. Aragon Wine Market, 27 S. Ninth Ave. 433-9463 or aragonwinemarket.com.

CHRISTOPHER’S CONCERTS 6 p.m. The Modern Eldorados performs at the seventh season of the free Spring concert series presented by St. Christopher’s Episcopal Church. Bring lawn chairs and blankets to listen on the lawn at this family-friendly event. Concessions are available.

St. Christopher’s Episcopal Church, 3200 N. 12th Ave. 433-0074 or scpen.org .

VEGAN DINNER AT EOTL 6 p.m. End of the Line Café, 610 E. Wright St. 429-0336 or eotlcafe.com.

OPEN BOOKS ART & MENTAL HEALTH RECOVERY NIGHT 6 p.m. Open Books and the Prison Book Project will host an exhibition of paintings and drawings by artists in Lakev-

long it’s been since you took 10th-grade American Lit… but admitting that you need a refresher on this classic is O.K. And if somehow you missed out on this literary gem, you really should try and make it a point to read it before you see the movie.

OR AT LEAST CHECK OUT THE AUDIOBOOK

The newest audio version that’s available for download on audible.com is narrated by none other than Jake Gyllenhaal.

FILM SCHOOL

Did you know there’s already a movie?

Made in the ‘70s, this version of “The Great Gatsby” stars Sam Waterston as narrator Nick Carraway, with Mia Farrow as Daisy Buchanan and Robert Redford as Gatsby,

iew Center’s Café P.E.R.C. (Peer Education & Recovery Community), an art therapy program for clients in recovery from mental illness. A presentation on the Café PERC program, currently in its first year, and a silent auction for the pieces on exhibit will also take place. The event is free, but donations are accepted and will benefit Cafe P.E.R.C. and the Prison Book Project.

Open Books, 1040 N. Guillemard St. 453-6774 or openbookspcola.org AFRICAN DRUMMING CLASSES 6:30 p.m. $2$5. Gull Point Community Center, 7000 Spanish Trail. For more information contact, 291-2718, 324-4928 or hurreyupstageandfilmworks.com.

live music

BO ROBERTS, RHONDA HART, AND MARK SHERILL, TROY BRANNON 5, COWBOY JOHNSON 5 p.m. Beachbillys 6 p.m. Wes Loper & Thomas Jenkins 9 p.m. J. Hawkins Band 10 p.m. Cornbred 10:30 p.m. Florabama, 17401 Perdido Key Dr. 492-0611 or florabama.com.

THE DAVENPORTS 6 p.m. The Leisure Club, 126 S. Palafox. 912-4229 or tlcdowntown.com.

LUCAS CRUTCHFIELD 6 p.m. The Deck at The Fish House, 600 S. Barracks St. 470-0003 or fishhouse.goodgrits.com.

BUCK WILD 6 p.m. Paradise Bar & Grill, 21 Via de

Beyonce covering Amy Winehouse.

Emeli Sande covering Beyonce. Plus Jay-Z, Jack White, Florence and the Machine and even Gotye. As far as soundtracks go, it doesn’t get bigger than this one. Go listen now, if you haven’t already.

REMEMBER ROMEO

Need a reminder of the magic Luhrmann and DiCaprio are capable of creating together? Look no further than their ‘90s take on the classic “Romeo and Juliet.” And why not turn it into an entire Luhrmann movie-watching marathon and add in “Moulin Rouge!” while you’re at it.

GET “CARRIED” AWAY

Carey Mulligan as Daisy Buchanan is pretty much everywhere right now—if you’re into fashion magazines and blogs that is. So if you want to soak up some Gatsby fashion before heading to the theater, pick up the current issue of Vogue and swoon away. {in}

Luna, Pensacola Beach. paradisebar-grill.com.

WB SEARCY 6 p.m. Peg Leg Pete’s, 1010 Fort Pickens Road, Pensacola Beach. 932-4139 or peglegpetes.com BRAD BARNES OPEN COLLEGE JAM 7:30 p.m. Goat Lips Beer Garden, 2811 Copter Rd. 474-1919.

KARAOKE WITH BECKY 7:30 p.m. Sabine Sandbar, 715 Pensacola Beach Blvd., Pensacola Beach. 934-3141 or dalesbigdeck.com.

COLLIE BUDDZ- LIGHT IT UP TOUR, CHRIS CAB, NEW KINGSTON 7:30 p.m. $17. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox, vinylmusichall.com.

DUELLING PIANOS 8 p.m. Rosie O’Grady’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

KRAZY GEORGE’S KARAOKE 8 p.m. Lili Marlene’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

OPEN MIC NIGHT p.m. Chan’s Nightclub, 610 E. Nine Mile Rd. 477-9961 or chanspensacola.com.

TWIN TIGERS, THE SPANX, TRASSH, AND MORE 8 p.m. The Handlebar, 319 N. Tarragona St. 434-9060 or pensacolahandlebar.com.

COLLEGE DANCE NIGHT: DJ TONY C 9 p.m.

Phineas Phogg’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

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May 9, 2013

happenings BIG JIM BROWN 9 p.m. End O’ The Alley at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

GRAND THEFT AUDIO 9 p.m. Apple Annie’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

EXTREME KARAOKE WITH G.C.P.C 10 p.m.

Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or gulfcoastpartycrew.com.

FRIDAY 5.10

TAI CHI AT FLORIDA BLUE 8:30 a.m. Free.

Florida Blue, 1680 Airport Blvd. For information, call 202-4188.

DAUMIER: ART FOR THE MASSES 10 a.m. Through June 30. Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jefferson St. 432-6247 or pensacolamuseumofart.org.

‘LOST AND FOUND’ 10 a.m. Through May 18.

Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. Palafox. 429-9100 or bluemorninggallery.com.

MAKE YOUR OWN ORNAMENT, FLOWER, PAPER WEIGHT or SWEDISH BOWL 10 a.m.-3 p.m. $25-$95 The workshops offer a short but comprehensive introduction for people to become familiar with the process of working molten hot glass. Students will be able to pick out their color then design and create a piece of glass with the assistance of our professional glass artists. First City Art Center, 1060 N. Guillemard St. For information or to sign up for workshops call 429-1222 or visit firstcityart.org.

PARKINSON’S SUPPORT GROUP 1 p.m. – 2p.m. Hosted by West Florida Memory Disorder Clinic. The session’s topic will be will be “VA Services” presented by James Cook, VA Services

Center. The session is free and open to all Parkinson’s patients and caregivers, but registration is required. Community Rooms of the West Florida Rehabilitation Institute, 8391 N. Davis Hwy. 494-3212.

PLAY HAPPY HOUR 4 p.m. Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or iplaypensacola.com.

WINE TASTING AT SEVILLE QUARTER 5 p.m.

Palace Café at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

WINE TASTING AT CITY GROCERY 5:15 p.m.

City Grocery, 2050 N. 12th Ave. 469-8100.

WINE TASTING AT EAST HILL MARKET 5:30 p.m. 1216 N. Ninth Ave. Meter Rentals $5. T.T. Wentworth Museum, 330 S. Jefferson. 595-5985 ext 111.

BANDS ON THE BLACKWATER 6 p.m.- 8 p.m.

Dr. Breeze performs at the Second season of The City of Milton’s free summer concert series.

Bring your blankets, lawn chairs, and coolers to enjoy the sounds of summer along the Riverwalk.

Milton River Walk, Main St. Milton. 983-5466 or ci.milton.fl.us.

STARGAZING AT FORT PICKENS 6:30 p.m. – 10 p.m. Weather permitting, volunteers from the Escambia Amateur Astronomers’ Association will set up several telescopes for public viewing of the stars, planets and constellations. The program is free; however, there is an $8 entrance fee to the Fort Pickens Area. Battery Worth Picnic Area, Fort Pickens, 1400 Fort Pickens Rd. 934-2600.

CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF 7:30 p.m. Presented

by Pensacola Little Theatre. A powerful Southern family gathers at a birthday celebration for patriarch Big Daddy, who does not know that he is dying of cancer. In a scramble to secure their

part of his estate, family members hide the truth about his diagnosis from him and Big Mama.

Front and center as tensions mount are alcoholic former football hero Brick and his beautiful but sexually frustrated wife Maggie “the Cat”. As their troubled relationship comes to a stormy and steamy climax, a shockwave of secrets are finally revealed. Tickets starting at $14. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. 432-2042.

3 GAME SPECIAL 8:30 p.m. $12, includes shoes.

DeLuna Lanes, 590 E. 9 Mile Road. 478-9522 or delunalanes.com.

SWING DANCING 8:30 p.m. $5. American Legion, 1401 Intendencia St. 437-5465 or pensacolaswing.com.

‘STAND UP COMEDY SHOW’ 9:30 p.m. Big Easy Tavern, 710 N. Palafox. bigeasytavern.com or 208-5976.

COSMIC BOWLING 11 p.m. DeLuna Lanes, 590 E. 9 Mile Road. 478-9522 or delunalanes.com.

live music

DAVE JOHNSON, TROY BRANNON 1 p.m.

Johnny B Trio 5 p.m. The Big Earl Show 5:30 p.m.

Sam Glass Trio 6 p.m. Wes Loper & Thomas Jenkins 9:30 p.m. Ryan Balthrop 10 p.m. Hung Jury 10:30 p.m. Florabama, 17401 Perdido Key Dr. 492-0611 or florabama.com.

LUCAS CRUTCHFIELD 5 p.m. The Deck at The Fish House, 600 S. Barracks St. 470-0003 or fishhouse.goodgrits.com.

THE SUN DOGS 6 p.m. Paradise Bar & Grill, 21 Via de Luna, Pensacola Beach. paradisebar-grill.com.

PAUL KILLOUGH 6 p.m. The Oar House, 1000 S Pace Blvd. 549-4444 or the-oar-house.com.

DOWNTOWN BIG BAND 6:30 p.m. Gregory Street Assembly Hall, 501 E. Gregory St. 307-8633.

Rucker Brings His ‘Wagon Wheel’ to Town

photo by Jim Wright Country music fans will flock to Pensacola Bay Center on Friday, May 10 for a night filled with new tunes and talented musicians. Darius Rucker will be headlining the event in promotion of his third solo country album, “True Believers,” due in stores May 21. Staying true to real-life stories that define country music, Rucker has crafted an album that is consistent and complex, full of joy, pain and passion. Now he is looking forward to the next chapter—bringing these new songs to the

Antebellum with the background vocals, and it keeps rising up the charts.

Top-charting country singer Justin Moore, and 2013 ACM New Female Vocalist winner and New Artist of the Year nominee Jana Kramer will be accompanying Rucker to Pensacola. Kramer, whose self-titled album was named “Best of 2013”

by Billboard and iTunes, has sold over a million tracks including “Why Ya Wanna” and her new single, “Whiskey.” Moore’s star status has grown with number ones including, “If Heaven Wasn’t So Far Away” and “Til My Last Day.” {in}

DARIUS RUCKER

WHAT: Darius Rucker with Justin Moore and Jana Kramer WHEN: 7:30 p.m. Friday, May 10 WHERE: Pensacola Bay Center, 201 E. Gregory St. COST: $25 - $67.50 DETAILS: Tickets available at ticketmaster.com; dariusrucker.com

Choose between Shrimp Scampi & Fettuccine, Coconut Chicken Breast, or Stuffed Fish, with two sides, bread, dessert & drink.

9

$ 99

MEALS

By Whitney Fike

stage. Rucker wrote 10 of the 12 tracks and used this album to collaborate with many artists including Sheryl Crow.

The former lead singer of Hootie and the Blowfish will be treating concertgoers to songs from three of his country albums. Rucker went solo and turned country in 2008 when he released “Learn to Live” with the album’s hit single, “Don’t Think I Don’t Think About It.” His current hit single, “Wagon Wheel,” co-credited to Bob Dylan and Old Crow Medicine Show, has reached No. 1 on CMT’s Hot Country Songs list.

Rucker has said that his cover of the Old Crow Medicine Show song came from seeing it performed at his daughter’s talent show. He even had help from his tour partners and Capitol Records labelmates Lady

SPECIALS

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happenings

Ears & Fingers

by Jason Leger

IMAGINARY AIR SHOW – ‘IMAGINARY AIR SHOW’

“Sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love it yourself. It is as if they are showing you the way.” This is one of my favorite quotes from one of my favorite books ever written, “Blue Like Jazz” by Donald Miller.

It has applied to several instances in my life, but recently, and perhaps most succinctly, this quote came to mind while watching the band Imaginary Air Show perform. As they are locals, I have the good fortune of being friends with most of the band, and I know that between teaching music, recording music, listening to music, and of course, playing music, these guys eat, sleep, and breathe it. While I do obviously love music, these guys show a better way with their commitment and drive. Now, the band has time capsuled 35 minutes of music and shared it with the world, and the wait was very much worth it. Something about Todd Vilardi’s lyrics and seemingly unconcerned tone—though, one would be remiss to confuse swagger with indifference—mixed with Brandon Warren’s always tasteful

CODY COLLINS 7 p.m. Peg Leg Pete’s, 1010 Fort Pickens Road, Pensacola Beach. 932-4139 or peglegpetes.com.

KARAOKE WITH BECKY 7:30 p.m. Sabine Sandbar, 715 Pensacola Beach Blvd., Pensacola Beach. 934-3141 or dalesbigdeck.com.

CADILLAC ATTACK DUO 8:30 p.m. Tin Cow, 102 S. Palafox. For more information, call 466-2103.

BLACKWATER, BRANDED X 9 p.m. Chan’s Nightclub, 610 E. Nine Mile Rd. 477-9961 or chanspensacola.com.

LIVE MUSIC 9 p.m. The Deck at The Fish House, 600 S. Barracks St. 470-0003 or fishhouse. goodgrits.com.

ENGLAND IN 1819, PALOMA, ALPHABET CITY 9 p.m. The Handlebar, 319 N. Tarragona St. 434-9060 or pensacolahandlebar.com.

DJ MR. LAO 9 p.m. Phineas Phogg’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

BUZZ CUT 9 p.m. Lili Marlene’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

GRAND THEFT AUDIO 9 p.m. Apple Annie’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211

drumming and the thick synth and bass trade-off s from Sean Peterson and Aaron Finlay make these 10 songs worthy of getting caught up and lost in. Album highlights are the upbeat “Spirit In The Sigh,” introspective commentary “Instructions” (“You’re text messaging, Rome is burning. Checking your email while Rome is burning.”), and Joy Division-esque album opener “Sour Sweat.” Personally, the absolute stand out track is the hazy and layered “New Proclamation.” It isn’t very often that the word “beefy” comes to mind to describe a synth line, but when it does, I revel in it. Head over to the band’s bandcamp page (imaginaryairshow.bandcamp.com) to download the album—it’s only $5—and make a point to catch these guys when you have the opportunity. You might learn something.

IGGY AND THE STOOGES – ‘READY TO DIE’

Sometimes in life, we lose our way and need someone to set our course back to where it should be. Usually, it requires looking back to where we started to try and figure out where things went wrong.

Sometimes, our catalyst comes in the form of someone who cares and wants us to be our absolute best. Other times, however, our catalyst comes riding in with no shirt on, leather pants that can’t be allowing much circulation, long hair blowing in the breeze, and a middle finger in the air. Iggy Pop is back and by all accounts and purposes, he is in the best form of his life. When Iggy and the Stooges released “The Weirdness” six years ago, there was a lot of disappointment from fans over the meekness of the album. Pitchfork gave

or sevillequarter.com.

BIG JIM BROWN 9 p.m. End O’ The Alley at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

BAT 9:30 p.m. Hopjacks Pizza Kitchen & Taproom, 20 S. Palafox. hopjacks.com.

SATURDAY 5.11

PALAFOX MARKET 8 a.m.-2 p.m. Martin Luther King Jr. Plaza, N. Palafox St. palafoxmarket.com.

‘LOST AND FOUND’ 10 a.m. Through May 18.

Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. Palafox. 429-9100 or bluemorninggallery.com.

MAKE YOUR OWN ORNAMENT, FLOWER, PAPER WEIGHT or SWEDISH BOWL 10 a.m.-3 p.m. $25-$95. First City Art Center, 1060 N. Guillemard St 429-1222 or firstcityart.org.

HEALTH FAIR 10 a.m. – 3 p.m. Presented by Florida Blue. Learn your numbers! We offer free health screenings, BMI measurements and one-on-one wellness counseling, plus chair massages, a free gift, refreshments and a chance to win a $25 gift card! Florida Blue, 1680 Airport Blvd. 202-4188.

the album a 1.0, which is dreadfully low— the only lower albums I’ve seen came from Jet—and the reviewer said that it “hideously disgraces the band’s original work.” Not that Pitchfork is the end-all, but that was a common reaction. “Ready to Die” marks a return to form for Iggy and the Stooges.

Raucous, raw, honest and aggressive, this album not only shows all the reasons why Iggy and the Stooges were groundbreakers for many of the punk/hardcore/indie/ alternative bands that followed in their footsteps, but it also reveals why the band’s relevance lives on now. This album could stand toe-to-toe with many punk/alternative albums being pumped out today, but it will always have the upper hand of experience, and probably some cheap shots.

Highlights for me are “Dd’s,” “Beat That Guy,” and album opener “Burn.” “Ready To Die” is out now via Fat Possum Records, be sure to head to Revolver Records to snag a copy—they even have free Stooges posters and bumper stickers to go with your purchase while they last—which won’t be long, of course. {in}

MOTHER’S DAY PLANT SALE 10 a.m.- 3 p.m.

The 14th Annual Mother’s Day Plant Sale and Arts and Crafts Show will be hosted by the Santa Rosa Clean Community System, Inc. Art and craft vendors are invited to participate and showcase their items. Vendors will be located throughout the grounds of the nursery, which makes a beautiful backdrop for vendors while visitors are strolling through to check out the plants, shrubs and hanging baskets that are available. Green-Up Nursery, 6758 Park Ave., Milton. 623-1930.

TOUR OF THE BASILICA OF SAINT MICHAEL 10 a.m. – 4 p.m. A free escorted tour through the beautiful Victorian church interior includes the exquisite statuary of the Stations of the Cross.

The Basilica has numerous and exceptional stained glass windows designed and installed by Emil Frei, whose work is recognized as an unsurpassed example of the Munich Style of Pictorial Stained Glass. These windows represent some of the artistic treasures of Pensacola. The visitors will also view noteworthy vestments worn during the Catholic liturgical year. Other beautiful artifacts from the heritage of the Basilica include

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May 9, 2013

Mother’s Day Brunch on the Bay S U N D AY, M AY 1 2 • 1 1 A . M . U N T I L 2 P. M .

BOTTOMLESS CHAMPAGNE AND MIMOSAS FOR $4.95 AND BLOODY MARYS FOR $2 Mom’s brunch favorites including four versions of eggs Benedict, our world-famous grits à ya ya, bananas Foster French toast, blueberry Belgian waffles, vegetable frittata, the Monte Cristo, plus lemon-infused olive oil-poached salmon!

FISH HOUSE: OPEN DAILY AT 11 A.M. · ATLAS OYSTER HOUSE: OPEN MON.– SAT. 5 P.M., SUN. 11 A.M. · (850) 470-0003 · 600 S. BARRACKS ST. · CREDIT CARDS OK · WWW.GOODGRITS.COM

Treat Your Mom with a special gift from Still Waters!

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May 9, 2013

happenings a relic of the True Cross, an 18th century prie dieu and other elegant vessels and reliquary many that were gifts of Spain. Basilica of Saint Michael, 19 N. Palafox St. 438-4986.

ART IN THE PARK 10 a.m. – 5 p.m. The Pensacola Museum of Art presents the 2013 annual Art in the Park, a juried arts festival featuring more than 80 regional and national artists. The Museum is delighted to serve again as festival host as it continues its goal to provide Pensacola with unique selections of cultural and artistic experiences to explore. Immerse yourself in the arts through a selection of activities, all located within the beautiful setting of historic Seville Square. Artists’ booths feature a full range of media - ceramics, photography, jewelry, sculpture, paintings and more! Seville Square, 311 East Government St. pensacolamuseumofart.org.

DAUMIER: ART FOR THE MASSES noon.

Through June 30. Pensacola Museum of Art, 407 S. Jefferson St. 432-6247 or pensacolamuseumofart.org.

JAPANESE FILM FESTIVAL noon- 9 p.m. Presented by The Japan-America Society of Northwest Florida. The three movies to be screened at this inaugural event are Yojimbo, Ping Pong and Summer Wars. There will also be food and drink tastings, short video segments about Japan’s recovery since last year’s earthquake, and a demonstration of the traditional Japanese tea ceremony by Kazuko Law. Admission is $15 or $5 for Japan-America Society members. Space is limited so reservations are encouraged. Movies 4 Theater, 1175 Gulf Breeze Pkwy. jasnwfl.org.

PLAY HAPPY HOUR 4 p.m. Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or iplaypensacola.com.

CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF 7:30 p.m. Tickets starting at $14. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. 432-2042.

COSMIC BOWLING 11 p.m. DeLuna Lanes, 590 E. 9 Mile Road. 478-9522 or delunalanes.com.

live music

J. HAWKINS & JAMES DANIEL, ROUX GA ROUX noon Troy Brannon 1 p.m. Bill Wharton & The Sauce Boss 3:30 p.m. Smokin’ Elvis 5 p.m.

The Big Earl Show 5:30 p.m. Waylon Thibodeux Band 7 p.m. Hurricane Warning 9:30 p.m. Neil Dover Band 10 p.m. Lee Yankie & Hellz Yeah 10:30 p.m. Florabama, 17401 Perdido Key Dr. 492-0611 or florabama.com.

JOHN WHEELER noon. Dave & Joe Show 7 p.m. Peg Leg Pete’s, 1010 Fort Pickens Road, Pensacola Beach. 932-4139 or peglegpetes.com.

MOST WANTED BAND 6 p.m. The Oar House, 1000 S Pace Blvd. 549-4444 or the-oar-house.com.

WAGON 6 p.m. Paradise Bar & Grill, 21 Via de Luna, Pensacola Beach. paradisebar-grill.com.

DUELLING PIANOS 8 p.m. Rosie O’Grady’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

JAMES ADKINS 8:30 p.m. Tin Cow, 102 S. Palafox. 466-2103.

KARAOKE WITH NICK 9 p.m. Hub Stacey’s Downtown, 312 E. Government St. 469-1001 or hubstaceys.com.

REDDOG AND FRIENDS 9:30 p.m. Hopjacks Pizza Kitchen & Taproom, 20 S. Palafox. hopjacks.com.

PETER B’S KARAOKE WITH DJ CHRIS UPTON 9 p.m. DeLuna Lanes, 590 E. 9 Mile Road. 4789522 or delunalanes.com.

LIVE MUSIC 9 p.m. The Deck at The Fish House, 600 S. Barracks St. 470-0003 or fishhouse. goodgrits.com.

BLACKWATER, BROOKE WOOD 9 p.m. Chan’s Nightclub, 610 E. Nine Mile Rd. 477-9961 or chanspensacola.com.

DJ MR. LAO 9 p.m. Phineas Phogg’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

BIG JIM BROWN 9 p.m. End O’ The Alley at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

BUZZ CUT 9 p.m. Lili Marlene’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

GRAND THEFT AUDIO 9 p.m. Apple Annie’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

KRAZY GEORGE KARAOKE 9 p.m. Hub Stacey’s Downtown, 312 E. Government St. 4691001 or hubstaceys.com.

SUNDAY 5.12

‘LOST AND FOUND’ 10 a.m. Through May 18.

Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. Palafox. 429-9100 or bluemorninggallery.com.

ART IN THE PARK 10 a.m. – 5 p.m. The Pensacola Museum of Art presents the 2013 annual Art in the Park, a juried arts festival featuring more than 80 regional and national artists. Seville Square, 311 East Government St. pensacolamuseumofart.org.

CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF 2:30 p.m. Tickets starting at $14. Pensacola Little Theatre, 400 S. Jefferson St. 432-2042.

PLAY HAPPY HOUR 4 p.m. Play, 16 S. Palafox, Suite 100. 466-3080 or iplaypensacola.com.

PENSACOLA BLUE WAHOOS 4 p.m. Versus Chattanooga . Pensacola Bayfront Stadium, 300 W Main St. 934-8444 or bluewahoos.com.

live music

LEA ANNE & FRIENDS noon Mercy Brothers 12:30 p.m. Smokey Otis Duo 1 p.m. Waylon Thibodeux Band 3:30 p.m. Robert Wayne Trio, Lucky Doggs 5 p.m. Wes Bayliss and Bert Summersell 9 p.m. Cornbred 9:30 p.m. Florabama, 17401 Perdido Key Dr. 492-0611 or florabama.com.

TANYA GALLEGHER noon. Cadillac Attack 7 p.m. Peg Leg Pete’s, 1010 Fort Pickens Road, Pensacola Beach. 932-4139 or peglegpetes.com SCOTT KOEHN 3 p.m. The Grand Marlin, 400 Pensacola Beach Blvd. Pensacola Beach. 677-9153 or thegrandmarlin.com.

SARAH PEARCY 3:30 p.m. The Oar House, 1000 S Pace Blvd. 549-4444 or the-oar-house.com.

JOHN JOYNER 4 p.m. Hub Stacey’s the Point, 5851 Galvez Rd. 497-0071 or hubstaceys.com.

RON WILLIAMSON OPEN MIC JAM 6 p.m. Goat Lips Beer Garden, 2811 Copter Road. 474-1919.

CLUTCH, THE SWORD, LIONIZE 7 p.m. $28$30. Vinyl Music Hall, 2 S. Palafox, vinylmusichall. com.

KRAZY GEORGE KARAOKE 8 p.m. Lili Marlene’s at Seville Quarter, 130 E. Government St. 434-6211 or sevillequarter.com.

MUSIC AND KARAOKE 9 p.m. Sandshaker Lounge, 731 Pensacola Beach Blvd., Pensacola Beach. 932-2211 or sandshaker.com.

KARAOKE WITH DEBBIE 9 p.m Paddy O’ Leary’s. 49 Via De Luna Dr. Pensacola Beach. 9169808 or paddyolearysirishpub.com.

MONDAY 5.13

‘LOST AND FOUND’ 10 a.m. Through May 18.

Blue Morning Gallery, 21 S. Palafox. 429-9100 or bluemorninggallery.com.

BODACIOUS LEARNING LUNCHES 11:30-12:30 p.m. $20. The Bodacious Olive, 407-D S. Palafox.

433-6505 or bodaciousolive.com.

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May 9, 2013

news of the weird FRONTIERS OF PARENTING Caribou Baby, a Brooklyn, N.Y., “eco-friendly maternity, baby and lifestyle store,” has recently been hosting gatherings at which parents exchange tips on “elimination communication”—the weaning of infants without benefit of diapers (as reported in April by the New York Times).

Parents watch for cues, such as a certain “cry or grimace” that supposedly signals that the tot urgently needs to be hoisted onto a potty.

(Eventually, they say, the potty serves to cue the baby.) Dealing with diapers is so unpleasant, they say, that cleaning an occasional mess becomes tolerable. The little darlings’ public appearances sometimes call for diapers, but can also be dealt with by taking the baby behind the nearest tree. One parent even admitted, “I have absolutely been at parties and witnessed people putting their baby over the sink.”

CAN’T POSSIBLY BE TRUE Washington, D.C.’s WRC-TV reported in March that a woman from the Maryland suburbs showed a reporter a traffic citation she had just received, ticketing her for driving in the left lane on Interstate 95 in Laurel while going only 63 mph—compared to the posted (“maximum”) speed of 65. The citation read, “Failure of driver ... to keep right.” The station’s meteorologist noted that winds that day were gusting to 40 mph and that the woman might simply have been trying to control her car.

DEMOCRACY BLUES The city council of Oita, Japan, refused to seat a recently elected member because he refused to remove the mask he always wears in public. Professional wrestler “Skull Reaper A-ji” said his fans would not accept him as authentic if he strayed from his character. Some masked U.S. wrestlers, and especially the popular Mexican “lucha libre” wrestlers, share the sentiment. (At press time, the issue was apparently still unresolved in Oita.)

UNCLEAR ON THE CONCEPT Passive possession of child pornography is not a victimless crime, authorities say, because by defini-

by Chuck Shepherd

tion a child had been abused in the creation of the image, but that reasoning was no relief for New Zealander Ronald Clark, who was sentenced to three months in jail in Auckland in April for watching pornographic cartoon videos of short-statured elves and pixies. A child-protection activist acknowledged that no child was harmed in the creation of the Japanese anime artwork, but insisted that it was still injurious because “(I)t’s all part of that spectrum.” Clark said he wondered if he might also be convicted for viewing sexual stick-figure drawings.

SUSPICIONS CONFIRMED California street gangs stage fights whose locations can be accurately predicted using the same algorithm that anthropologists use to predict where lions and hyenas will fight in the wild to protect their own territories. A UCLA researcher, using the standard “Lotka-Volterra” equation on 13 equal-sized criminal gangs in the Boyle Heights neighborhood in east Los Angeles, produced a table of probabilities showing how far from each gang’s border any fights were likely to occur. In the period 1999 to 2002, the formula correctly showed that about 58 percent of shootings occurred within 0.2 miles of the border, 83 percent within 0.4 miles, and 97 percent within 1 mile.

LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS Just Because It Worked Once: Carl Bellenir, 48, was arrested in San Luis Obispo, Calif., in February after he had successfully cashed in, at a Santa Barbara Bank & Trust, several rolls of pennies that had been stuffed into rolls labeled for dimes. Bellenir apparently did not realize that the rolls would be examined later in the day and so returned the very next morning to the same bank and tried it again. Police were called, and Bellenir fled, but he was captured down the street at a Bank of America trying the same trick. {in} From Universal Press Syndicate Chuck Shepherd’s News Of The Weird © 2013 Chuck Shepherd

Send your weird news to Chuck Shepherd, P.O. Box 18737, Tampa, Fla., 33679 or weirdnews@earthlink.net, or go to newsoftheweird.com

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Independent News | May 9, 2013 | inweekly.net