Insights magazine september 2013 by Insight for Living Canada

SEPTEMBER 2013

DO YOU KNOW YOUR

VALUE?

In this issue

6 3

The Enduring Value of a Mentor Charles R. Swindoll

6 Dryer Balls and Discontent Robyn Roste 8

What is God’s purpose for me now that I’m older?

11 Does Everyone Go to Heaven? Dr. Malcolm Gill 14 Q & A Steve Johnson

LAUGHING MATTERS The Proverbs 31 Guy Phil Callaway

Copyright © 2013 Insight for Living Canada. All rights reserved. No portion of this monthly publication may be reproduced in any form without prior written permission from the publisher. Insights is published by IFLC, the Bible-teaching ministry of Charles R. Swindoll. IFLC is an autonomous ministry and certified member of the Canadian Council of Christian Charities. Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture passages are taken from the NASB. Unless otherwise noted, photography and illustration by IFLC staff. Printed in Canada.

by Charles R. Swindoll 3

There we sat, a cluster of six.

stubby orange candle burned at the drinking at the same well, soaking up the centre of our table, flickering shad- same spirit. Thirty years ago, Ray Stedows across our faces. One spoke; five man had been my model; now he had listened. Every question was handled with become my mentor. I’ve discovered that when individusuch grace, such ease—each answer drawn from deep wells of wisdom, shaped by als are young and gifted, the most comtough decisions, nurtured by time. And mon tendency is for them to drift toward pain. And mistakes and mistreatment. arrogance and, sometimes, raw conceit. Honed by tests, risks, heartbreaks, and Almost without exception, when I detect failures. Decades in the same crucible had conceit in individuals, I think to myself, They haven’t been mentored. Mentoring can made this man’s counsel invaluable. inhibit drifting. I’ve His age? Seventynever met a selftwo. He had weath"When I began high important, arrogant ered it all—all the school, I stuttered so individual who has flack and delights been well menof a flock. He had badly I couldn’t finish tored. Arrogance outlasted all the a sentence." fads and gimdoesn’t survive micks of gullible mentoring. A menand greedy generations. He had known tor points out blind spots and reproves the ecstasy of seeing lives revolution- you when you need to be confronted about ized, as well as the agony of lives ruined your pride. A mentor won’t back off. A and the heartbreaking monotony of lives mentor relentlessly presses for excellence. unchanged. He had paid his dues—with A mentor cares about your character. the scars to prove it. That was Ray. Thoroughly human and We sat for more than three hours hear- absolutely authentic, he had emerged ing his stories, pondering his principles, a well-worn vessel of honour fit for the and probing his conclusions. The evening Master’s use. And that night around that was punctuated with periodic outbursts little orange candle, I found myself proof laughter followed by protracted periods foundly grateful that Ray’s shadow had of quiet talk. As I participated, suddenly, crossed my life. I was 26 again—a young seminarian and Ray wasn’t my first mentor—nor would pastoral intern existing in a no man’s land he be the last. When I began high school, between a heart full of desire and a head I stuttered so badly I couldn’t finish a senfull of dreams. Long on theological theo- tence. The last place I wanted to be was ries but short on practical experience, I in front of an audience! You know what had answers to questions no one was ask- made the difference? A mentor named ing and a lack of understanding about the Dick Nieme. things that really mattered. I was in great When I began serving overseas in the need of being mentored. Marine Corps and found myself unwillIn flashbacks, I saw myself in the same ingly separated from my newlywed wife, room with this man 30 years earlier, I was self-focused, disheartened, lonely, 4

The Enduring Value of a Mentor continued from p. 3

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and disillusioned. Seventeen months later, I returned home transformed…and impassioned for ministry. The differencemaker? A mentor named Bob Newkirk. Another of my mentors, Dr. Howard Hendricks, said that every Christian needs at least three individuals in his or her life. We need someone who has come before us who mentors us. We need another beside us who shares our burden. And we need someone beyond us whom we’re mentoring. Otherwise, we grow stagnant. How about you? Do I write to any today who feel past their prime and rather useless? Any empty nesters with no one left to influence? Let me assure you: you haven’t lived this long for nothing! There’s a younger generation in the family of God who yearns for your time…who needs your wisdom…who longs for a trusted mentor willing to impart the thumbprint of character on them. Why do I say this with such conviction? Two reasons. First, it’s biblical. In Paul’s final letter to Timothy, we read these words: “The things which you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses, entrust these to faithful men who will be able to teach others also” (2 Tim. 2:2). Entrust literally means to hand over “something to someone…for safekeeping.” I like that image. We invest the truth like a trust in the lives of others. We have a valuable message we pass along to others.

Paul the Apostle entrusted his heart, soul, truths, confrontations, encouragements, affirmations—his very life—to Timothy. The second reason I believe in mentoring is because I am the product of it. These men I’ve mentioned—as well as a few more—made a major difference in my life. They saw potential where I did not. They encouraged me to become someone more than I was. They reproved and corrected me. They pointed out my “blind spots.” They modelled what I longed to become. They made me want to be a mentor myself. As a result of being mentored, I learned the value of being vulnerable, open, unguarded, and honest—a person of authenticity. I’ll never forget that evening with Ray Stedman, now more than 20 years ago. As I said goodbye to Ray that night, I walked a little slower. I thought about the things he had taught me without directly instructing me, the courage he had given me without deliberately exhorting me. I found myself wanting to run back to his car and tell him again how much I loved and admired him—my mentor. I wish I had done that. And as I stood there alone in the cold night air, I suddenly realized what I wanted to be when I grew up. ▪ Photograph of Chuck Swindoll © 2012 by Luke Edmonson

by Robyn Roste

ne evening I found myself perched dryer sheets, which were bad according to on a couch at my friend's place lis- the presenter. My friend laughed and said tening to a passionate pitch about “Yeah I can always tell which of my friends why I should switch cleaning products. I use dryer sheets. Robyn definitely does. wasn’t too interested—I don’t like being Whenever she borrows clothes from me pressured into making impulse purchases they always return smelling funny.” The at home sales parties—but I tried to stay room erupted in laughter. In advertising this tactic is known engaged in the pitch, to show respect to as social shame, and it’s nothing new. the presenter if nothing else. Everything was fine until the dryer ball Our fear of being judged by our peers is was introduced. The ball would replace enough to send us running to the store 6

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to purchase whatever it is that makes inside, our beauty will shine through, no us acceptable to others. Be it dryer balls, matter what we look like on the outside. Chuck Swindoll comments on this paswhitening toothpaste, skin tag removers, or otherwise. Wondering what others sage in his commentary on 1 Peter writing, are saying behind our backs creates inse- “This kind of emphasis isn’t popular today. Western culture values the showy, the curity and discontentment. Of course, this all happens on a sub- fashionable, the trendy. Media bombards liminal level. I don’t think anyone con- us with one message: ‘Look your best at sciously thinks, “If I dye all the grey out of all costs!’ The world lavishes its treasures my hair, my mate will love me more.” But on those considered the most physically isn’t that kind of what the advertisements beautiful. But God turns the tables on are implying? And if we hear the message the world’s agenda. The internal adornenough—even if we don’t fully compre- ment of virtue never goes out of style; it’s imperishable. While the quality of a gentle hend it—don’t we begin to believe it? This makes me wonder how society’s and quiet spirit may not impress the redpractice of social shaming affects the carpet crowd at the Academy Awards, it’s way we imagine God feels about us. Do precious in God’s sight.” 1 we subconsciously believe we have to True beauty, worth, look or behave a certain way to gain His approval? Do we wonder if He’s going to and value don’t come stop loving us if we don’t present a nice from external appearances enough appearance? I hope not, but still but from a person’s attitude I wonder. The good news is God tells us what and spirit. He thinks in His Word. And the Bible even gives us some guidance to the kind It takes some thick skin to care more of beauty we should be chasing. “Your about what God thinks than what the beauty should not come from outward world thinks, but the transformation is adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles possible. It takes a heart open to God’s and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine leading, a mind trained to discern, and clothes. Rather, it should be that of your the courage to stand out if necessary. I inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle look forward to a day where other people’s and quiet spirit, which is of great worth opinions don’t make me insecure because in God’s sight,” (1 Pet. 3:3-4). While this my confidence rests squarely on what God text is aimed at wives, I think the context thinks of me. Won’t that be a victory. ▪ can apply to everyone. True beauty, worth, 1 Charles R. Swindoll, Swindoll’s New Testament Insights: Insights and value don’t come from external on James, 1 & 2 Peter, (Zondervan, Grand Rapids, 2010), 188. appearances but from a person’s attitude Robyn Roste is the Living Bridge Media manager at and spirit. When we pay attention to the Insight for Living Canada. 7

THE PROVERBS 31

GUY

by Phil Callaway

I’m told there are more phone calls placed on Mother’s Day than any other day of the year. And on Father’s Day there are more collect phone calls placed. Why? Quite simply: Children have always believed Dad’s wallet was loaded. My son asked me for 40 dollars once. I said, “Thirty dollars? I don’t have 20 dollars! Where am I gonna get 10 dollars? And what do you need five dollars for?” Somewhere in my youth Dad offered me a watch if I would read a chapter of the Bible’s book of Proverbs each day for a month. I discovered 31 surprisingly frank chapters packed with wisdom. Thirty tell men

LAUGHING MATTERS

to smarten up and guard our hearts, eyes, and minds. And the final chapter is a beautiful—and at times intimidating—hymn to mothers. The book prepared me for Mother’s and Father’s Day sermons in church. Dad has been gone five years now. And I don’t wear the watch anymore. (The one I wear came from my Scottish grandfather on his deathbed. It cost me 35 bucks. Plus tax.) Though I can’t ask Dad for money or call him collect, I can pay tribute to him with a poem loosely adapted from that glorious ode to the perfect wife and mother that I first read when I was 13. This is my take on the Proverbs 31 Guy.

legs

"HE PREFERETH A HOME TO A HOUSE, SCRIPTURE TO PACMAN, A CAR THAT’S PAID FOR TO THE SMELL OF NEW LEATHER SEATS." A GOOD HUSBAND is hard to find. And worth more than a lifetime supply of Belgian chocolate. His wife trusteth him without regret, enjoying his company so much that she may even golf with him should she take leave of her senses. He buyeth her the choicest of finery, but never on credit. When accused of being borderline cheap, he calls it thrifty. He payeth more attention to his children than his smartphone or Netflix. Somehow he findeth time to attend their sporting events, stifling his desire to scream at referees. He doth also attend recitals, never wincing nor bursting forth with laughter when sour trumpet notes are hit. He naggeth not his children, loving the sound of their laughter more than that of his own voice. Though screaming ensues, he dealeth with it calmly, Disciplining in love, then buying ice cream. He kisseth owies, repaireth leaky sinks and shattered vases, muttering but softly when he stubbeth his toe. He even exerciseth verbal restraint when stepping upon Lego blocks in the night. Selah. He lowereth his expectations for a clean house, praising his wife for hard work and new hairdos. He provideth gladly for his family, avoiding signs that say: “No payments until February.” He prefereth a home to a house, Scripture to Pacman, a car that’s paid for to the smell of new leather seats.

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He forgetteth not his anniversary, complimenting his wife’s clothing, Yea even her purse. With great wisdom he bringeth along a book to read, whilst his wife shops. With gladness doth he make the bed. On her 78th birthday. He complaineth not about the in-laws, but joyfully cutteth the roast when they visit. He careth more about widows and orphans, than buying boats and vacation homes. He chooseth wisely his Facebook friends, Avoiding the second glance, and the seedy side of the Internet. Though his girth may grow and his hairline recede, he laughs at the days to come. Strength and honour are his calling cards. serving God his greatest pleasure. Meet him at the door with a kiss and a welcome home ladies, for he is to be valued above diamonds, dark chocolate and season tickets to the symphony. Festoon his plate with ice cream and mangoes, adorn his feet with cushions and turn on the game. For fame is fleeting and good looks fade, but a man who loves his family and his God is a living celebration. ▪ Phil Callaway is an author and popular speaker. Visit him at www.laughagain.org

ON THE AIR IN OCTOBER

LIVING ON THE RAGGED EDGE Like a carrot on the end of a stick, fulfilment eludes us…regardless of how we fill in the blank. Chuck Swindoll examines King Solomon’s vain quest for satisfaction, recorded in the book of Ecclesiastes. In this straightforward study, we discover the ultimate secret for the “good life”—a life of meaning and satisfaction in a world on the ragged edge.

UPCOMING MESSAGES INCLUDE: Putting Wisdom to Work The Qualities of a Good Boss Have a Blast While You Last! An Objective View of the Rat Race

by Dr. Malcolm Gill

arlier this year I was at a large university gauging students’ understanding about the identity of Jesus. The questions were fairly straightforward and simply asked the students what they thought of when they heard the name Jesus. The responses were wide and varied. For some, Jesus was a historical figure who lived a good life and offered good wisdom. He was kind of a self-help nice guy. Others felt Jesus was just an ordinary man who others invented to be some kind of superhero. Still others felt that Jesus was some kind of prophet from God. He was, in their mind, a miracle worker who basically wanted everyone to be happy. A small minority believe He never existed. 12

Does Everyone Go to Heaven? continued from p. 11

The responses of the students gave us a snapshot into how people think about Jesus. For those who have an opinion about Jesus their perception is normally that He was a safe, loving, and caring man who had some good things to say, but really has very little significance for our modern world. A good guy, but kind of irrelevant. These students were, however, shocked to hear the actual claims of Jesus Himself. Far from being the politically correct, hippie-like teacher, Jesus, they found, made extraordinary claims about Himself. Jesus’ statement about himself in John 14:6 was particularly confronting. In that verse Jesus says, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except

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"Jesus’ exclusive claim to be 'the way' not one of 'many ways' to heaven is something that makes many feel uncomfortable." through me.” This statement rocked the students because in it they clearly heard Jesus’ claim of authority. Jesus’ exclusive claim to be “the way” not one of “many ways” to heaven is something that makes many feel uncomfortable. In our pluralistic culture we’d like to think that everyone regardless of religion, gender, age, or ethnicity will all wind up in a “better place” after death. Jesus, however, teaches that entrance to God’s presence, both now and in the future, is only possible through Him. Jesus states it plainly when he says, “All who believe in God’s Son have eternal life. Those who don’t obey the Son will never experience eternal life, but the wrath of God remains upon them” (John 3:36 NLT). Likewise Peter states, “There is salvation in no one else! There is no other name in all of heaven for people to call on to save them” (Acts 4:12). The teaching of Jesus and the apostles is unmistakable. Heaven is for those who have been saved from their sin by trusting in Jesus. Heaven is not a mythical place for all people regardless of their background. Heaven is God’s redeemed creation populated by those who have trusted in the finished work of Jesus. Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection are the basis, and the only

basis, upon which eternal life can be made. This brings up a few questions we must ask ourselves. Am I living with the reality in mind? Does it strike me that my neighbour, my boss, my son or daughter needs Christ to enter into God’s new creation? Does the reality that a person must hear of Jesus and His forgiveness move me to speak up and talk of the abundant life found in Him? The startling fact that Jesus is the only way to heaven has practical implications for us. FIRST, the fact that Jesus is the only way to heaven should move us to be people who pray. We need to pray for those in our sphere of influence who don’t know Jesus. Pray for workmates, family members, parents. Pray they would come to trust in this all sufficient Saviour. SECOND, we should look for opportunities to speak with others about the hope we have for heaven. It should be clear to those we meet that our hope is not based on our achievements, but on the achievements of Jesus who died for us. THIRD, our focus must be missional. Our task is to take the Good News to people all over the world who haven’t heard the Gospel message. We should pray for and support those who take God’s message of hope to the nations. Jesus is not the safe, politically correct, hippie-like teacher of modern day pluralism. He is the exclusive Saviour who offers the hope of heaven to all who would come to Him in humility and faith. ▪ Dr. Malcolm Gill is a biblical counsellor and board member of Insight for Living Australia. He is a full-time lecturer at Sydney Missionary and Bible College. Dr. Gill lives in Sydney with his wife Tamara and three children Annabel, Adam and Zara-Lily.

Visit our website for further reading on this topic. www.insightforliving.ca/insight-topic/how-know-god

QUESTION: What is God’s purpose for me now that I’m older and don’t feel as needed as I once did? ANSWER: When we are younger it seems a bit easier to relate to God’s purpose for our lives. We readily find meaning in our role as a parent, in social relationships, in work, and in church activity. As we age this can change. Our sense of purpose and the many relationships we had while working may decline after retirement. The clear sense of direction and fulfilment we had when raising our children can dissolve once they leave the nest. Even church responsibilities we once held are passed to the next generation. The world’s message seems to be the older you get the less valuable you become. In stark contrast, God’s kingdom places a premium on those who are further along in life. While youth is not to be despised those who are older are valued because they usually have wisdom, maturity, and experience. 14

In one sense our purpose never changes or diminishes with age. It is always to glorify God (1 Cor. 10:31). But how this is worked out changes. It’s different than it was. Certainly physical infirmities may limit what we can do but only death can stop us from doing what we can. Psalm 92:14 says of believers, “They will still bear fruit in old age, they will stay fresh and green…” (NIV). Consider this: Many Bible characters repurposed their lives in their later years. Moses and Aaron were 80 and 83 when chosen to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. Joshua, who lived to be 110, led the conquest of Canaan during the last 30 years of his life. And Caleb was involved in the conquest of Canaan in his eighties. And it doesn’t end there. Daniel, Zacharias and Elizabeth, Simeon and Anna, and even Paul, who referred to himself as aged (Phlm. 1:9), made significant contributions in old age.

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However, we don’t need to be older or retired to desire a greater sense of God’s purpose for our lives. Here are a few ways to repurpose at any age. 1. Know the Lord and have a vital relationship with Him. “That I may know him…” (Phil. 3:10) was Paul’s stated life-purpose. This is also our ultimate purpose and it provides the foundation for truly seeking His will for our life. One key to continuing to bear fruit at any age is a willingness to serve the Lord and be used by Him however He sees fit. We must continue to be surrendered to Him and prayerfully seek Him and ask for wisdom through the process of repurposing. 2. Know yourself. God has given us spiritual gifts, talents, abilities, experiences, interests, and passions. Understanding our nature provides good clues on how we can purposefully serve Him. While we may not be able to do what we did before, perhaps there are things related to these tasks we can do. 3. Know the opportunities. Beyond the ongoing need in churches for elders, older people who will teach younger people, prayer warriors, hospitality, mentor-

ing, and evangelism, there are abundant opportunities outside churches to serve using the skills and life experience we already have. Many older Christians find themselves free to serve in other capacities without the restrictions of work or younger children. 4. Know it is possible to find a new sense of purpose. By adopting a positive attitude and being open to new things and willing to adapt we can find new purpose. When we ask God to help us find new opportunities He often places people in our paths who can help us take the next steps. All believers have ultimate purpose in daily walking with the Lord. That never changes. Expressing that in service never stops either, it’s just different as we go through life. And always needed. I hope this helps. - Steve Steve Johnson is the executive director at Insight for Living Canada.

Websites like www.missionfinder. org/retirees/, www.globalopps.org/, and www.christianretirement.com/ are great resources for dealing with life change.

THIS MONTH’S FEATURED RESOURCE

HEAR ME WHEN I CALL Connecting with a God Who Cares

Do you ever struggle to express your heart to God in prayer? In Hear Me When I Call, Chuck mentors you through prayers on matters of the heart. He provides a petitioning prayer specific to each of 90 devotions, guiding you through the issues of your life. See enclosed form for ordering information

The Hullabaloo at Hunker Hill A spin in a soapbox derby car turns into a disaster! This special audio episode of Paws & Tales teaches about forgiveness and is available for a limited time for only $1! Order 20 or more copies to receive this amazing deal to ensure every princess or cowboy who rings your doorbell will receive a message of hope that will never decay.

Taking on Life With a Great Attitude single CD message

Drawing on the inspiration from the life of Caleb, Chuck Swindoll shows us that whatever the challenge, when we choose to follow the Lord fully, we can expect victory—and our attitude should show it. If you’re facing a tough set of challenges, you can’t afford to miss this high-spirited message!

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The Wise and the Wild 30 Devotions on Women of the Bible devotional by Insight for Living, 136 pages

Meet 30 women whose stories are told in the Bible. Some wise, others wild—all of them at crossroads of choice. The warnings and examples from their lives will show women—and men— how to cope, how to hold on, and how to deal with the pressures of merging life with godliness.

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Moving from Fear to Freedom: A Woman-to-Woman Conversation

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Moving from Fear to Freedom: A Woman-to-Woman Conversation study guide by Grace Fox, 53 pages

If left unchecked, fear can rob us of life’s full potential. Dealing with it appropriately brings personal freedom. Packed with insightful teaching, this seven-part study guide provides the keys to unlock fear’s grip. Designed for use with the accompanying DVD.

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Hear Me When I Call: Connecting with a God Who Cares paperback devotional by Charles R. Swindoll, 288 pages

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Living on the Ragged Edge: Coming to Terms with Reality paperback by Charles R. Swindoll, 382 pages

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Do you want to find joy and peace in a world gone mad? In the book of Ecclesiastes, Solomon shares the ultimate secret for the “good life.” Chuck brings home Solomon’s powerful message for living at its best.

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Encouraging Words for Discouraging Days

Divorce and Remarriage According to Jesus

Releasing the Burden of Shame

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Re-release with updated content! Booklet by Charles R. Swindoll, 40 pages

booklet by Charles R. Swindoll, 44 pages.

Many of us have experienced deep discouragement. No matter how deep our pain, we all need a fresh reminder that God is in charge. In these four messages Chuck offers the encouraging words we need to hear when the bottom drops out.

When does the Bible permit divorce? Who may remarry with God’s blessing? Based on his 50 years of pastoral ministry Chuck provides sound biblical guidance to those facing tough choices.

All of us have committed acts we’re ashamed of and carry the scars in our souls. Has shame weighed you down to the point of despair? If you’re ready to let go of its load, there is One who can lift the weight of shame from your life.

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