Selling with Empathy

SELLING

WITH EMPATHY In the second of her three-part series, SARAH HINCHLIFFE explores how the ‘six habits of highly empathic people’ can help us become better salespeople

In part 1 (see Winning Edge 2017 No 1) we cantered through Roman Krznaric’s Six Habits of Highly Empathic People, identified in his book Empathy. Krznaric defines empathy as “the art of stepping imaginatively into the shoes of another person, understanding their feelings and perspectives, and using that to guide your actions”. We learned that we are all wired for empathy and that we must simply develop our empathic brains and skills to make it natural behaviour. If you had a go at each of the six challenges I set, you should be getting the idea. Now let’s bring the subject back from the personal perspective and give it a business angle. Krznaric confirms that empathy helps with three aspects of selling: 1 Building relationships – buying and selling are people-based activities 2 Inspiring creativity – a sure way to differentiate your offering

FIGURE 1: BUYING AND SELLING STAGES ALIGNING THE STAGES ENCOURAGES EMPATHY

Status quo

BUYER Need emerges Define need Access options Address worries Make a choice

Provide insight and thought leadership

SELLER Become important Shape needs

Create compelling offer

Build confidence Negotiate and close

3 Underpinning culture and codes –creating shared values on which to build strong trust and loyalty.

With this in mind, let’s consider how each of the six habits can increase sales potential.

SWITCH ON HABIT 1: Selling is not about you, it’s about your

Switch on your customer. It’s not about your products empathic brain Shifting our mental frameworks to recognise that and services, it’s about what benefits they can bring to your customer’s empathy is at the core of business. Shifting your mindset so that human nature, and that it your customer comes first is crucial can be expanded and there are some simple steps you throughout our lives can take to support this change. Being sensitive to your customer’s buying cycle is a great start. Rather than designing a sales process based on the stages you intend to go through to make a sale, create one based on your customer’s buying stages. Focus on identifying what stage your customer is in and align your actions as shown in Figure 1 opposite. Your actions at each stage must focus on helping your customer move their business forward. Modern selling (both online and traditional) is far more about helping your customer to envision a better place through insightful and helpful interaction. No more product pushing for a quick sale. Throughout, it’s important to be genuine. Faking it will show sooner or later. You need to share your customer’s pain and show that you really care about taking it away, not just show polite interest. They will notice and respect you for your authenticity.

TUNE IN

HABIT 2: Make the imaginative leap Previously, we learned that prejudice, authority, distance and denial are four

Making a conscious effort barriers that prevent us tuning in to to step into other people’s other people. Highly empathic people shoes – including those of our ‘enemies’ – and to acknowledge their tend to be more open-minded and prepared to defy authority. They see humanity, individuality everyone as individuals, even those and perspectives they regard as enemies, and seek to appreciate them. As salespeople, we need to get to know our buyer. Is it one person or a team? What is the composition of the team? Teams may cover many parts of the business, including the user community, technical, quality, delivery, finance and procurement. Once we know who they are, we must put ourselves in their shoes, whether sandals, brogues or army boots. In the ideal world, we will get to understand each person’s role, objectives, incentives, likes and dislikes, fears and hopes. No more treating the procurement department as a necessary evil only to be engaged at the last

minute in a price war. No more worrying that the business sponsor is a superior being. Everyone is equal. Everyone is human. Everyone, including you, is simply trying to do their job properly.

Tuning in early and engaging sincerely will bring insight into the buyers and the buying dynamics. With this insight, you will be able to hone your communications to build stronger trust and credibility.

DIG DEEP When I was a rookie HABIT 3: Seek salesperson back in the experiential adventures 1980s, our boot camp Exploring lives and cultures that contrast with our own through direct immersion, training introduced us to the idea of a DILO – a empathetic journeying and Day In the Life Of. We social cooperation were encouraged to go out into our customers’ worlds and experience their lives. In my first sales job in computing, I spent wonderful days at the BBC script unit and special effects department pondering how technology could benefit them. In those days, we knew way more than our customers about computers, so this wasn’t difficult. Now, with the internet and social forums, our customers often know as much about our products as we do, and if they don’t they “know a man who does”, so we must work hard to stay at least one step ahead. If we wish to become a trusted partner and adviser to our customers, we must be savvier than them. So, spend time with your customer and with your customer’s customer – overtly or incognito like many of Krznaric’s examples. Try a job swap, or a mystery shop. Convert what you learn into stunning business ideas that will transform your customer’s business and allow them to see you as someone who made a difference.

LISTEN UP

The Greek philosopher

HABIT 4: Practise the Epictetus is famous for his art of conversation wisdom: “You were born Fostering curiosity about with two ears and one strangers and radical listening, and taking off our emotional masks mouth for a reason, so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.” This saying is often quoted in relation to the tendency (perceived or real) of salespeople to talk too much and listen too little. The most basic of sales skills is about listening to your customer’s needs and wants before offering a solution. Even so, it’s amazing how many

“Everyone is human. Everyone, including you, is simply trying to do their job properly”

salespeople still fall into the trap of launching into the superlative features of their products and services, without the faintest idea of their customer’s motivation.

Krznaric encourages us to be radical in our listening – to completely put aside our own thoughts and desires in favour of taking in every tiny emotional and logical detail and nuance we are hearing. He encourages us to be truly interested in our conversation partners and to bare our own souls in our responses.

SIT DOWN Habit Five is sometimes known as HABIT 5: “armchair empathy”. It’s about getting

Travel in your armchair to know the world through theatre, Transporting ourselves into films, photos, books and songs. other people’s minds with the help of art, literature, film and online To get to know our customers better, we must continually develop our understanding. Today, we have access to an almost unlimited source of written and visual material via the Internet, as well as traditional media. There is no excuse not to include desk research in your daily sales life. Make time in your diary to step back, sit down and be creative about how you can help your customers.

GET RADICAL Applying Habit Six in its purest sense to HABIT 6: selling is perhaps beyond the call of

Inspire a revolution duty. Instead, think of it as really Generating empathy on a mass scale to create social change, and extending our pushing the boundaries so as to come up with innovation that could make a empathy skills to embrace step change. the natural world Can you turn a problem upside down? Or propose a new operating model? Or make a compelling return on investment case? Inside your own company, can you change how resources are deployed to support the sales cause better? To be truly different these days, we must be consistently more thoughtful and more insightful than both our customer and our competitors.

SARAH HINCHLIFFE is a director of i4 Sales Performance,* a business focusing on helping small and medium-sized enterprises (SMEs) achieve sales and bid excellence. i4 is a Shipley Business Partner. See www. i4salesperformance.co.uk or email sarah@i4salesperformance.co.uk *i4 Sales Performance is the brand name of the services supplied by i4 Consultancy and Design. IT’S A WRAP So, we’ve switched on, tuned in, dug deep, listened up, sat down and got radical. Along the way, we should have built better relationships based on genuine interest and understanding in our customers’ businesses and the individuals involved. This knowledge and rapport should have inspired ideas and trust. Altogether, this should have made us different enough to win.

Next time, we’ll delve into how to apply the six habits to writing a winning proposal.