September / October 2024

FASHIONABLE FORCES: POL’ ATTEU & PATRIK SIMPSON

A little birdie told me.

Stock photo. Posed by model.

inmagazine.ca

PUBLISHER

Patricia Salib

EDITOR

Christopher Turner

ART DIRECTOR

Georges Sarkis

COPY EDITOR

Ruth Hanley

SENIOR COLUMNISTS

Paul Gallant, Doug Wallace CONTRIBUTORS

Adriana Ermter, Shane Gallagher, Elio Iannacci, Karen Kwan, Hannah Mercanti, Stephan Petar

VICE PRESIDENT OF DEVELOPMENT

Benjamin Chafe

COMMUNITY RESOURCE NAVIGATOR

Tyra Blizzard

ADVERTISING & OTHER INQUIRIES benjamin@elevatemediagroup.co

EDITORIAL INQUIRIES editor@inmagazine.ca

IN Magazine is published six times per year by Elevate Media Group (https://elevatemediagroup.co). All rights reserved. Visit www.inmagazine.ca daily for 2SLGBTQI+ content.

180 John St, Suite #509, Toronto, Ontario, M5T 1X5

ON THE COVER: Pol’ Atteu and Patrik Simpson

PHOTOGRAPHER: Farbod Jafarpour

transition.

Issue 120

September / October 2024

INFRONT

06 | DEVERY JACOBS ON HER SPICY AND RIVETING AUDIOBOOK DEBUT

We chat with Devery Jacobs about her first audiobook narration, In the Hands of Men, which tells queer Indigenous stories

09 | FALL INTO HEALTHY ROUTINES

Ease into a healthy fall with these five strategies

11 | LATINOS POSITIVOS IS COMBATTING STIGMA AND SUPPORTING THEIR COMMUNITY

The Toronto-based non-profit organization helps empower Latinos and Latinas living with HIV/AIDS surpass the impact of diagnosis and establish a supportive and accepting community

13 | CALLING ALL EMERGING QUEER FILMMAKERS!

The I+N StoryLab/histoires queer contemporaines is looking for a roster of diverse, driven and – above all – creative applicants who are interested in working to get their stories written so they can be seen!

14 | FREE WALK-IN HIV/STI SCREENINGS ARE BACK IN MONTREAL’S VILLAGE

La Zone Rose returns to Ste-Catherine Street with a shipping container that serves as a centre for intervention, discussion and free walk-in HIV/STI screenings for men and transgender individuals

FEATURES

16 | BOTTOMING FOR ALL! CREATING A HOLEISTIC PLATFORM FOR COMFORT AND CONFIDENCE

As chief bottom officer, Alexander Hall is on a mission to make people feel and perform their best when they bottom

18 | JOHNNY BE GOOD

Gay porn star Johnny Donovan stars in KinkMen’s The Electro Dom

21 | THE RISE OF A SOCIAL MEDIUM

Known on social media as the Warrior Unicorn, Travis Holp says he connects clients with those who have passed over and delivers messages to their loved ones in the physical world

24 | SOCIAL MEDIA STAR STANCHRIS WANTS TO BRIGHTEN UP YOUR DAY

The prominent gay YouTuber and social media creator has dedicated his platform to creating engaging LGBTQ+ content

30 | WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO QUEER SIGNALLING?

Queer people have been innovating in fashion for decades, but now our styles have begun to go mainstream

34 | SHOULD 2SLGBTQI+ PEOPLE ALWAYS FORGIVE AND FORGET THE INJUSTICES THEY’VE FACED?

“Forgiveness… is not merely irresponsible. It is a historical impossibility.”

36 | AJ MCLEAN’S JOURNEY TO GETTING HEALTHIER THAN HE’S EVER BEEN

The “bad boy” of the Backstreet Boys has cleaned up his act. He chats with IN about sobriety, healthy routines, and why it’s more important than ever to be an ally to the LGBTQ+ community

38 | FASHIONABLE FORCES

Up close and personal with iconic gay fashion designer Pol’ Atteu and his husband, Patrik Simpson, who open up on their legendary collaborations, their multi-platform empire and the state of the red carpet

44 | ONE SIZE FITS ALL

Pre-packing a toiletry bag with all the right stuff may just change the way you travel

46 | GAME ON IN VIENNA

EuroGames 2024 celebrated unity in diversity, with a rainbow of athletic talent and a whole lot of glitter

50 | FLASHBACK: SEPTEMBER 7, 2001 IN 2SLGBTQI+ HISTORY

PrideVision TV, Canada’s first LGBT+ channel, launches

The power of social media: In August the viral “demure” trend exploded on TikTok, Twitter, and the rest of the internet. The “demure” trend went so viral, that trans influencer Jools Lebron, the TikToker behind the audio, can now finance the rest of her

DEVERY JACOBS ON HER SPICY AND RIVETING AUDIOBOOK DEBUT

We chat with Devery Jacobs about her first audiobook narration, In the Hands of Men, which tells queer Indigenous stories

By Stephan Petar

In the Hands of Men follows protagonist Delilah as she navigates a world where an unexplained virus turns men into animals. Throughout the novel, Delilah embarks on a vengeful killing spree, but also grapples with her quest for love, the unresolved trauma of her missing cousin and the question of whether she is a monster too or is just taking her power back from the hands of men.

“I couldn’t put it down,” says Devery Jacobs (she/they), who narrates the debut novel by Indigenous writer and musician Gin Sexsmith (she/her) from Tyendinaga Mohawk Territory. While the book was released in 2023, it has now been adapted into a Canadian Audible Original audiobook.

Jacobs, from Kahnawà:ke Mohawk Territory, is a rising star in Hollywood. She was in the Emmy-nominated Reservation Dogs, where she wore multiple hats as actor, writer and director. She was featured in the Marvel cinematic universe twice with What If…? and Echo, was most recently in the film Backspot, and is now in the middle of filming a new holiday film.

She is also an advocate and leader for Indigenous and 2SLGBTQI+ rights. This work is one reason she received the Radius Award, an honour given by the Academy of Canadian Cinema & Television to an actor who is making a global impact.

Photo by Ryan Pfluger courtesy of Audible.ca

While she’s a busy person, Jacobs says she knew she had to take on the project of narrating In the Hands of Men. “Had it not been a novel that spoke so much to me, I don’t think I would have necessarily made the time to do it, but this is so powerful,” Jacobs says. “It’s my hope that people will be spooked out, thrilled, enticed, and go through the whole gamut that is In the Hands of Men.”

We sat down with Jacobs recently to discuss the project, her take on telling queer and Indigenous stories, and her Radius Award honour.

In an Instagram comment for In the Hands of Men , you said that you “had the privilege of performing this visceral, powerful and sometimes spicy audiobook.” What attracted you to narrate this project?

I hadn’t heard of Gin Sexsmith or this novel before, which I was surprised by because I feel like I am the target demographic for it – being queer, specifically being Kahnawà:ke, and a fan of thrillers. What really drew me was the spiciness and honesty. Imagining myself reading this made me clutch my pearls a little bit because people are going to hear some spicy stuff from my voice.

It was exciting and challenged me to consider each of the characters. I was with Delilah but was also afraid of her and I didn’t know what she was going to do because she’s so unpredictable. There are so many aspects of this novel I really love, and I knew I wanted to voice it. Regardless of whether or not I was approached to voice the character, I would have been a huge fan. This is also my first audiobook ever, so I was intimidated a bit by it, but it was something I knew I had to take on.

As your first audiobook, what was that experience like compared to the voice work you’ve done on Marvel’s What If…? I assume it differs?

It’s entirely different. It was definitely challenging, but a process I really warmed to. With an animated series, you’re voicing one character, but in an audiobook you’re voicing everyone. So it’s having the different personalities, cadences, accents, tones, tenors. It was definitely out of my wheelhouse, but being directed by Deborah Burgess and getting to work closely with Gin, who sat in on each of the sessions, was really awesome.

Would you do it again?

I absolutely would. I feel spoiled with my first process.

Did you do anything to prepare? Were there things that worked for you or didn’t?

I would definitely do vocal warm-ups in the morning before going to sessions. There were little tips and tricks that I took to heart. I associated different characters with different people in my life, so I could have a hook to remember them by to make sure that when the character would reappear, after like 10 chapters, I was still in that space.

You can now add ‘audiobook narrator’ to your storytelling repertoire. To date, you’ve been behind and in front of the camera, writing, directing and acting. Are there other storytelling avenues you want to focus on or try?

I am in the process of writing a graphic novel with D. W. Waterson,

the director of Backspot, and I would love to venture into video games at some point. For me, it doesn’t matter what the medium is per se, as long as it’s a form of storytelling. Being able to voice an audiobook and bring Gin’s words to life was something that felt really special. Honestly, I feel like I found a long-time friend out of the process when we got together. It was just one of those things where it was like, ‘How do we not know each other already? How am I not already a fan of this ferocious and incredible writer?’

You’ve noted before that there are few queer and Indigenous characters in stories who are not undergoing trauma. Why is the industry inclined to portray queer, Indigenous and queer Indigenous people in these traumatic states?

If you look at Black Hollywood and the depictions of Black individuals back in the day, it’s primarily stories of enslavement and seeking freedom. For some reason, this is the only area where settlers and people in Western society really think of Native folks. They think of the genocide that was committed against us. They think we’re extinct and we’re ancient people. There are so many different points of modern North American history where we’ve had so much hardship.

In storytelling, and in film and TV, there’s an innate need for conflict. I feel those things get conflated and it feels like the only conflicts that can happen to Native people or Black people or queer people are these stories of hardship and oppression. While we face those things, we are not limited by our trauma, and I think so often marginalized people are reduced to stories of trauma. I think there are way more [stories] for us to pursue and to widen our view of these marginalized communities and to see us for the three-dimensional people we are: athletes, cheerleaders, queer, who live in suburbs or cities or rural areas and everything in between.

You recently received the Radius Award. What does it mean to get an award recognizing your global impact?

It makes me think of the first time I attended the Canadian Screen Awards.… I was really overwhelmed by the Canadian industry and knew nobody, and didn’t believe that I would be able to find a place in it because it felt so much greater than myself. To be a recipient of the Radius Award this year and to see that I’ve solidified a place for myself – with the support of countless artists who have lent their hands, have provided guidance and a sense of community – is really meaningful and a touchstone to tangibly see how far I’ve come in those 10 years.

Gin Sexsmith was part of the Audible Indigenous Writers’ Circle, an incubator for emerging writers. What queer, Indigenous or queer Indigenous emerging voices should we be paying attention to?

There’s a whole wave of people, whether that’s the entire writers’ room of Reservation Dogs, novelists like Gin Sexsmith or Joshua Whitehead, or filmmakers like Asia Youngman, Shaandiin Tome, Alex Lazarowich and Justin Ducharme. There are so many artists in the fashion space. Like every medium you can imagine, there are emerging voices who have the talent and the skills and the capability to make really incredible art. I’m excited to be coming up in a community that is surrounded by Indigiqueer, two-spirit artists who are able to come up and occupy the space that we haven’t had the chance to before.

Fall Into Healthy Routines

By Karen Kwan

For many of us, summertime equals rest, relaxation and fun, which means you may have let some healthy habits slide over the past few months…but with autumn here, it’s time to get back into a good routine. After all, there’s nothing like the fresh fall season to kickstart a new plan. The good news is, there are many simple ways you can shift back into a healthy fall routine that’ll bring some structure and peace to your life.

1. Include regular physical activity in your daily routine

The summer weather may have made it too tempting to enjoy some R&R in the sunshine rather than get your workouts done. To get back into being active regularly, sign up for a new session of fitness classes (or with a private personal trainer) so that not only do you make a financial commitment towards your health – which should help motivate you to make it to your workouts – but you’ll also have a standing appointment set in your calendar to work on your fitness. You can also plan for regular workouts with a friend; the buddy system can be very successful in ensuring you get your sweat session done. Also, consider ways you can include light activity in your day to day – maybe walking as you take a work call, or biking or running for your commute into the office now that you’re on a hybrid schedule.

2. Set up your kitchen with healthy foods

It’s easier to stick to a wholesome, balanced diet when you’ve stocked your kitchen with healthy ingredients. Prep cut-up fruit and veggies at the start of the week so they are ready for snacks or to use in salads or meals. Having some canned and frozen staples, such as canned tuna and frozen fruit, also make it simple to make a quick sandwich or smoothie rather than hitting up a fast-food drive-through or ordering food delivery. Also, with the fall season comes all of the delicious fall produce; use this as inspiration for

cooking up meals for the season – look for dishes that use apples, squash, beets and pumpkin, for example.

3. Cut back on your alcohol consumption

If your summer was filled with margaritas and Aperol spritzes, use this new season to cut back on your alcohol consumption. Replace some of your beverages with the non-alcoholic options available on the market – this way, you get that similar taste but without the alcohol. Also, if your soft-drink habit grew over the summer, it’s time to skip stocking up on these sugary drinks and instead fill your fridge with carbonated water – flavour it yourself with fruit, or stock up on the zero-sugar flavoured options.

4. Get organized at home

We tend to think of decluttering and cleaning as a task for the spring season, but fall is also a fantastic time to have a reset at home; having a neat, clutter-free space will bring you a sense of calmness. Swap out your summer wardrobe in your closets for your fall clothing and use this as an opportunity to declutter items you haven’t worn. Do the same with your pantry, cupboards and medicine cabinet – ditch housewares and food items you know you will never use, including any expired items.

5. Change up your skincare regimen

Fall means cooler temperatures and drier air, so you will need products that are more hydrating – look for ones containing hyaluronic acid and ceramides and products with a heavier, more moisturizing consistency. Lips may be drier this season, too, so be sure to get a supply of a hydrating lip balm and use it daily to prevent dry, cracked lips. (Of course, just because it’s fall doesn’t mean you can ditch the sunscreen. You need to wear SPF in every season to protect your skin from UV rays.)

Ease into a healthy fall with these five strategies

Photo by Javier García on Unsplash

Latinos Positivos Is Combatting Stigma And Supporting Their Community

The Toronto-based non-profit organization helps empower Latinos and Latinas living with HIV/AIDS surpass the impact of diagnosis and establish a supportive and accepting community

Many people living with HIV/AIDS across the country regularly experience stigma and discrimination due to their status, but statistics indicate that people living with HIV/AIDS from minority groups are confronted with the most stigma and discrimination. It’s one of the reasons why Latinos Positivos was founded back in 2007 after the AIDS International Conference in 2006, to address the need for culturally appropriate services for Latinx newcomers to Toronto and surrounding areas. The Toronto-based non-profit organization provides practical and much-needed services for the community, alongside educational activities, social events, retreats and more.

“Today, we provide services to more than 300 Hispanic community members from across the GTA,” Ower Alexander Oberto, an Immigration, Income & Community Liaison with Latinos Positivos, recently told IN Magazine

Being recognized as an ethnic community with a strengthened voice within the larger HIV/AIDS community in Toronto

CONFIDENTIAL SPACE

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workshops, and social events where community members can gather,” says Oberto.

Providing social support and interpretation isn’t the only way the organization is working to make a difference to community members. Thanks to psychologist volunteers from the IBERO University in Mexico, Latinos Positivos is able to provide emotional accompaniment to its members. It also offers peer counselling from Latinx people who are living with HIV and have similar lived experiences, and offers symposiums and workshops to provide education to community members.

The organization, which receives support from organizations like ViiV Healthcare Canada, also offers more practical office support, such as printing, photocopies and other office supplies as additional ways to address the pressing needs of the Latino community affected by HIV.

“We can address these, and other needs by ensuring access to culturally appropriate healthcare services regardless of the immigration status of our community members, and by supporting community-based organizations like Latinos Positivos, and promoting policies that address the specific challenges faced by the Latino community,” says Oberto. “Ensuring sustainability involves ongoing funding, community engagement, and regular evaluation of programs to meet

Calling All Emerging Queer Filmmakers!

The I+N StoryLab/histoires queer contemporaines is looking for a roster of diverse, driven and – above all – creative applicants who are interested in working to get their stories written so they can be seen!

The I+N StoryLab/histoires queer contemporaines, produced by image+nation culture queer in collaboration with Telefilm Canada and SODEC, is looking to bring queer content creators together with queer filmmaking mentors from across the country for a storytelling think tank and short film scriptwriting initiative. The application process is open until 11:59 pm on September 10, 2024, with the storytelling think tank and short film scriptwriting initiative beginning in September and continuing with weekly mentorship sessions throughout the fall.

Through workshops and mentorship, the I+N StoryLab/histoires queer contemporaines will focus on developing useful tools and strategies to foster authenticity, outreach, production, collaboration and connection through storytelling. The I+N StoryLab/histoires queer contemporaines will provide participants with concrete means to create new Canadian queer stories that speak of contemporary queer perspectives and experiences.

Emphasizing inclusivity, this exciting initiative seeks participants who represent our country’s diverse regional voices – fostering content creation from distinct Canadian perspectives and positionings while emphasizing voices from francoqueers and under-represented queers from Indigenous, two-spirit, indigiqueer, BPOC (Black and People of Colour) and other racialized communities.

For more information on the storytelling think tank and short film scriptwriting initiative, visit www.image-nation.org/en/in-storylab-en/ (English) or www.image-nation.org/in-storylab/ (French).

The deadline to submit an application is 11:59 pm on Tuesday, September 10, 2024.

Free Walk-In

HIV/STI Screenings Are Back In Montreal’s Village

La Zone Rose returns to Ste-Catherine Street with a shipping container that serves as a centre for intervention, discussion and free walk-in HIV/STI screenings for men and transgender individuals

Last year a Montreal-based non-profit made an incredible impact on their community and on the ongoing fight against the HIV/AIDS epidemic by promoting sexual health and offering free walk-in HIV and sexually transmitted infection (STI) screenings to men and transgender individuals across the city. This year the initiative is back, expanded and ready to make an even bigger impact.

La Zone Rose is a pop-up, walk-in clinic operated by RÉZO, a Montreal-based non-profit that has been around since 1991 and promotes mental, physical, social and sexual health to GBQ (gay, bisexual, queer) men and transgender people.

RÉZO has been doing outreach in Montreal’s gay Village for over three decades and has long had a kiosk on Ste-Catherine Street in the summer months. It started La Zone Rose last year as a way to encourage the public to get tested while bringing the community together. Because rapid access to testing remains incredibly difficult for many in Montreal, and because testing is the key to reducing the transmission of HIV and other STIs, RÉZO believes that communities have the right to services that are adapted to them, which is what really drives the initiative.

“La Zone Rose reinforces direct access to screening and is becoming an essential service in the Village, if only to listen and get informed on a wide range of key topics for our communities,” Alexandre Dumont Blais, executive director of RÉZO, tells IN Magazine

When La Zone Rose opened its colourful shipping container doors last summer, people immediately began lining up, showing the need for such services in the area. “Our first edition was a resounding success,” Dumont Blais says. “This summer, we’re kicking things up a notch with a wider range of screening options.”

It’s back!

For its second edition, La Zone Rose is back on Ste-Catherine Street (between Panet and Plessis) and open from Tuesday to Saturday, from 2 pm to 7 pm, until September 28, 2024, for those who want to talk about their sexual, physical and/or mental health. The shipping container, with its giant pink cone on the roof, is also open to those who are simply in need of easy and quick HIV and STI testing. This year, the presence of La Zone Rose is being strengthened and extended with a creative and unique pink zone.

Photos courtesy of RÉZO

La Zone Rose, with its diverse team and street work experience, provides listening, information on key issues, and prevention materials. They aim to improve the Village’s image by showcasing the solidarity and mobilizing abilities of the community and its allies.

Since RÉZO is a registered non-profit, bringing back La Zone Rose and expanding the initiative with the pink zone has relied on the assistance of community and corporate partners like Gilead Sciences Canada. This is the second year that Gilead has financially supported the Zone Rose initiative.

Gilead has committed to collaborating with community-based outreach organizations like RÉZO to promote HIV care.

“I’m proud that Gilead works with organizations like RÉZO to address barriers preventing access to HIV care,” says Kevin Schultz, HIV Business Unit Director at Gilead. “Investments and collaborations like this one are essential in our mission to help end the HIV epidemic for everyone, everywhere.”

Stats reinforce the need for more testing

On average, six Canadians die every week from HIV-related illnesses, and 35 more are newly diagnosed with the virus, according to HIV surveillance reports published by the Public Health Agency of Canada (PHAC). The most recent report highlights a 25 per cent increase in new HIV diagnoses since 2021, representing the largest increase in the last decade. A similar increase was observed in Montreal, where Public Health reported that the number of HIV diagnoses jumped 120 per cent in 2022.

The jump is partially explained by an increase in testing, according to Julian Gitelman, the lead physician for the sexually transmitted and blood-borne infections team at Montreal Public Health, and there is a need for more testing. Gitelman says the key to reaching the UNAIDS (Joint United Nations Programme on HIV/AIDS) target of zero new diagnoses is prevention.

RÉZO says that GBQ men continue to be significantly affected by HIV in Canada, accounting for 38 per cent of new cases in 2022.

“Our communities also bear the burden of other STIs such as LGV (lymphogranuloma venereum) and, more recently, Mpox,” RÉZO said in a news release. “Gonorrhea, chlamydia and syphilis continue to disproportionately affect our communities.”

Stats don’t lie – and they provide even more proof of the importance of the work being done in Montreal by Dumont Blais, RÉZO and the Zone Rose initiative. Encouraging the public to get tested and stay protected is an excellent way to bring the community together and help put an end to the HIV epidemic.

La Zone Rose

La Zone Rose is in the heart of Montreal’s gay Village on Ste-Catherine Street and will continue operating until September 28, 2024, from Tuesday to Saturday from 2pm to 7 pm (subject to change)..

For more information, visit www.rezosante.org.

Bottoming For All! Creating A Holeistic Platform For Comfort And Confidence

As chief bottom officer, Alexander Hall is on a mission to make people feel and perform their best when they bottom

By Stephan Petar

Have you seen that social media post about “the bottom diet?” The video of a person “cutting” ice cubes while weeping? Alexander Hall (he/they) did, and while he acknowledges it is a joke, he also knows that the world is full of bottoms starving themselves prior to intercourse. “There was this whole stigma that you couldn’t

eat before having sex, and I had just bottomed for 10 years damn well knowing that you can,” they tell IN Magazine

Hall also felt there weren’t any adequate or inclusive resources for those wanting to bottom. “If there was something, it was

only for gay people and that’s where I had a lot of problems.… There are eight billion of us on this planet. There are eight billion buttholes on this planet.”

In 2021, he co-founded The Bottom’s Digest with his partner, Mike Floeck, and assumed the role of chief bottom officer. The Digest is an inclusive learning platform for anyone who bottoms, wants to bottom or wants better gut health. What started as a cooking platform, showcasing bottom-friendly recipes to ensure there were no “starving sluts” in the world, has become a holeistic home for better bottoming. It provides tips, resources and recipes to make people feel and perform their best. It has grown to encompass a website and various social media platforms (YouTube, TikTok, Instagram) that have accumulated more than 355K followers.

“We founded The Bottom’s Digest as a cooking platform for a couple of reasons,” they explain. “One was to combat starving in the bedroom. Two was to dodge the algorithm on social media by making food content instead of straight-up sexual health content. It was able to push our information to the top through food, which is kind of our whole point. We all have a butt and we all have to eat. Stop making this only a gay issue.”

When asked what makes a food “bottom-friendly,” Hall notes it’s all about nuance. “With our cooking content, we always say, ‘Every dish is bottom-friendly depending on how your body reacts to things.’… You have to do the work to know your own body, to know your trigger foods.” Hall encourages us to think in general about foods that cause bloating (you don’t want that) and recommends we get more fibre in our diet.

When talking about the misinformation surrounding bottoming, Hall points to individualism as one of the main causes. “One person will do something that works for them, compounded by their lack of sex education, knowledge of porn and stuff, and be like, ‘I did this one thing. It worked for me. I’m going to spew that out to everyone.’… Misinformation comes from people who don’t have credentials.”

While Hall is not a doctor, he gets his information from accredited people, working with gastroenterologists and pelvic floor therapists. And Hall is an “incredible cook,” cooking since he was five years old. He also worked in reproductive rights, where he became passionate and knowledgeable about sex education, reproductive health and body autonomy.

The Bottom’s Digest quickly grew beyond food and began incorporating sex education. “I feel if we started with that too early, we would not have grown. I feel it [the algorithm on social media] would have found a way to suppress us,” he explained.

What started out as an even split in content between sex education and food turned into a 70/30 split, with sex education becoming the focus. “Food is not even sharing recipes anymore; it’s educating people about navigating their trigger foods, whereas for sex education there’s so much to explore like stress, stretching out, douching, aftercare, handling different penis sizes…moving from vagina to butt sex and back and forth. The list goes on!”

Anal sex is typically not a topic that’s spoken about often – if at all – in sex education classes, leaving many to figure it out individually through experimentation or word of mouth. The Bottom’s Digest creates an accessible platform teaching people who are curious about bottoming, or have been doing it for years, how to properly prepare and how to avoid hurting themselves.

For example, Hall explores the dangers of over-douching, where he lists the ways people could injure themselves. “Some shortterm dangers are if you’re using a shower shot and you turn it up too high, you could puncture your rectum.… If you’re using a shitty douche bulb and you push it in too hard, you can get an anal fissure. Long term, you can destroy your gut health and the healthy bacteria that live in your rectum.”

He also notes the biggest douching myth is that one needs to overdouche for bigger penis sizes. “No matter how big their penis is, it is not going to be snaking your colon. There’s a part of your colon called the rectosigmoid junction, where your rectum curves into your sigmoid colon. Your sigmoid colon is where your poop is stored, so if you’re over-douching, you’re disturbing an area of your body that did not need to be disturbed, and that’s going to make douching a nightmare…and throw off your bowel regularity.”

As well as expanding its content, the brand now sells douches and will be introducing new faces to the platform. This growth is due to the dedicated followers who thank Hall for his tips. He even gets messages from women who peg their boyfriends, who note how the channel makes it less scary. “People think that bottoming is a lot of work and that is a misconception. Once you get over the learning curve and you learn how to relax and how to navigate the foods you can eat before bottoming.”

Before ending our chat, we had to ask an important question. Are peaches and eggplants really good for bottoms? “Peaches and eggplants, technically, are pretty good because they’re fibrous,” Hall says. “Someone who’s sensitive to sugars and fruits, usually a person with a specific type of IBS [irritable bowel syndrome], they might be a little more sensitive to something like a peach or eggplant. It’s kind of rare that someone is really sensitive to something like eggplant, but it has to be prepared a certain way.… If you eat it raw, we’re all pretty sensitive. If you just bake eggplant, fry it, roast it, whatever, then it’s going to be pretty good.”

So while you may be taking that �� raw (��), don’t eat it raw.

Want to explore The Bottom’s Digest? Search thebottomsdigest.com for these three easy recipes you can whip up at home: Lemon Ricotta Pasta, Overnight Oats and a cheese sauce. Want to learn more about douching? Check out “douching made easy” and “douching 101.”

Johnny Be Good

Johnny Donovan began his adult career with gay porn studio Sean Cody where, as “Deacon,” his boy-next-door charm, strong onscreen presence and natural talent for engaging with the camera won over legions of horny fans. Now seeking to explore new horizons, Donovan has transitioned to KinkMen, where he is showcasing his versatility as a dom and sub and embracing more diverse and intense roles.

We spoke with Donovan on the set of The Electro Dom, his new film with fellow porn star Brody Fox.

We meet a new side of Johnny Donovan in The Electro Dom. What inspired you to take on the role? KinkMen.com has always been of interest to me. A lot of my

By Shane Gallagher

sexual firsts were on camera: my first threesome, my first orgy, my first times with FTM and MTF trans people.… I guess I thought if I wanted to try something new like flogging, caning or electro play, then it might as well be on film. There is a sense of safety for me on a porn set.

You play the Electro Dom. Are you always in control? I’m naturally more of a pleaser, so I enjoy dominating when I’m in tune with what my sub needs. When I’m feeling selfish and needy, I enjoy subbing more.

Let’s take it back a little. You grew up in Idaho. What was that like? My childhood was idyllic. I grew up in a small migrant farming community in southern Idaho. I was one of three white kids in a school of mostly Mexicans. I grew up enjoying the simple life, playing every sport, but mostly soccer.

Gay porn star Johnny Donovan stars in KinkMen’s The Electro Dom

Photo by Ivan Ávila

When did you first realize you were gay?

When I was 11, my best friend introduced me to this hardcore hetero site and I was way more into the men than my friend was, so I started to put some things together. I realized some of the boys I had been trying to get close to since elementary school were not necessarily boys I wanted to be friends with. Then middle school was so different. Suddenly I was nervous around the cute boys I used to be cool with and I just got more and more confused.

Did you have any early experiences?

One day in the locker room, my friend and I were talking about sex as we were undressing. I admitted I was a virgin, and he told me he had lots of sex. I asked him if the girls were pleased with his size because I thought I was bigger. He challenged me to a comparison. He said he was a grower and not a shower, so I asked, ‘What do you want to get it hard?’ I was hoping he would take the bait, but he just shrugged it off and made an excuse for us to hurry out of the locker room.

When did you come out to family and friends?

I came out to some of my friends right when I figured it out myself. It took me two years to come out to my parents, though. Even then I didn’t come out so much as just inform them I was dating a boy. My mom was a little shocked. She told me not to tell my dad because she thought it would be better if she got his initial reaction. From what I hear, he was a little upset by the news, but they both kept loving me. My siblings were even cooler about it. Some expected, and some were surprised: I try not to take offence to either reaction.

You were 27 when you and your partner, Ricky, both launched your careers with Sean Cody. Actually, I was 26, but I think I said I was 24 on the site. We had been together for two years at that point and had just started opening our relationship to threesomes. Deciding to get into porn was a little scary at first, but once we did it, it was great. It made us stop taking ourselves so seriously in a lot of ways. We both had three jobs before porn and we were stretching ourselves thin. Looking back, I feel more like a 26-year-old now than I did then. I felt like I was sprinting towards 50 with all the stress and worry about the future. I understand now that things I used to take so seriously don’t need to be.

What did your family and friends think of your decision to launch an adult film career?

My lifelong friends from high school thought it was crazy but cool. They live very heteronormative lives, and as open-minded and inclusive as they are, they get uncomfortable talking about anything they don’t know. My family was always on the side of ‘Just be as safe as you can.’ There has been no pushback, at least not to my face, and I feel supported emotionally.

What do you enjoy most about being an adult film star?

I like the people I work with. Sex work is becoming so normalized and taboos about sexuality are being lifted, so everyone I work with has made a conscious choice to do this work. They do it because they love it and it is work that comes naturally to them. Imagine working in any other industry where everyone around you enjoys what they are doing and they are really good at it. It’s

just a joy. I also like how we get to engage with our fans. Having my fan site outside of the studio stuff lets me connect with the people who are watching me in my films.

Will we see you in additional KinkMen films?

You will be seeing me start to explore my role as a switch this year. I can’t go into details about specific scenes, but I hope to get tied up a number of times and flogged.

Do you ultimately want to end up on the other side of the camera, filming and producing kink films?

I’ve played with the idea. My degree is in television broadcast, and I do love to write copy and edit footage…but I think the part I love about this business is in front of the camera. I don’t want to ruin that with too many auxiliary roles.

What do you see as the future of adult film?

The future has to be 3D, right? People are loving what VR has done to porn. I think the GoPro 360 camera and similar tools will continue to be used more in productions. Maybe we’ll eventually have adult theatres that are 4D experiences.

What makes Johnny Donovan smile?

Nothing makes me smile quite like the feeling of two round cheeks that fit into the palms of my hands while I’m seven inches deep.

What makes you crazy?

This thing my fiancé does with his tongue in my ear. It drives me insane, in a good way.

What is your prized possession?

I don’t put a lot of stock in possessions, but I lost my Kindle once and I thought I was going to throw up.

If you could convince any celeb to film a scene for KinkMen, who would you choose?

I would love to see Jason Momoa in a KinkMen.com scene where he is a biker and he forces me to spit-shine his bike and lick his and his biker friends’ boots. Then cut to a scene where they have me tied up on the bar and they each take their turn on me.

If anywhere on the planet were an option, where would you most like to live?

I think I would be happiest in La Jolla, San Diego, California. I mean, if it was at all affordable.

What’s left to do on your life’s bucket list?

Machu Picchu, Yosemite, snowboarding and surfing in New Zealand, getting married…so much to do!

Final message to fans?

The rest is love.

The Rise Of A Social Medium

Known on social media as the Warrior Unicorn, Travis Holp says he connects clients with those who have passed over and delivers messages to their loved ones in the physical world

By Shane Gallagher

Photos by Melissa Stone of Brazen House Studios

Gone are the days of Dionne Warwick’s Psychic Friends Network or dialing into 1-800 numbers to speak with clairvoyants like Miss Cleo. Many of today’s most popular psychic mediums are now using social media to share their gifts and abilities with their followers.

One of those mediums, Travis Holp, has close to 300,000 followers on Instagram and 500,000 on TikTok. He’s been featured on Entertainment Tonight as well as in Us Weekly and Elle magazines and on Today.com.

Known on social media as the Warrior Unicorn – a nod to his fighting spirit for LGBTQ and mental health awareness issues, combined with his sparkly personality – Holp connects with those who have passed over and delivers messages to their loved ones in the physical world. He spoke with us from his Washington home.

“I remember connecting to what I now know as my Spirit Guides.”

How did you discover your psychic abilities?

In 2017, a psychic gave me a reading, and she told me that one day I’d be doing the same kind of work that she did. During the pandemic, I ended a 17-year career in the beauty industry, and while I was figuring out what I wanted to do with my life, I started doing tarot readings on TikTok. Now here we are, and I’m fully leaning into helping others through Spirit [spirits that guide him].

How does Spirit appear to you?

I see (in my mind’s eye), hear and feel messages from Spirit. Spirit uses my own frame of reference and symbols to help me deliver messages to those who have come to seek that connection through me.

Do you recall your earliest brushes with Spirit?

I remember being very young, maybe four or five, and I would spend time in the book room at my grandparents’ house. While I was in that room, I remember connecting to what I now know as my Spirit Guides. I would also use the Ouija board with my grandmother and aunt.

What makes Travis Holp stand out from all the other popular psychic mediums working today?

I view myself as the ‘Guncle’ of the Spirit world. I’m the gay uncle that knows a lot of shit. I always tell it like it is, but I’m careful to deliver information with kindness, joy and hope.

The ‘Warrior Unicorn’ moniker is a nod to his fighting spirit for LGBTQ and mental health awareness issues, combined with his sparkly personality.

Why is it important for you to share your gift with others?

I believe I am meant to help others along their healing journey –whether that’s helping them connect to a loved one in spirit for peace, healing and closure, or helping them live the life they want to live. Also, sharing what I do with others helps other people who are like me understand that this is completely normal.

What are the main messages that the dearly departed wish to impart to their loved ones who are still living?

Let go of any regret, guilt or shame. Most of what we carry isn’t necessary, and love is what matters the most.

Is Spirit always around you?

It’s very much like using a radio. The stream is always there, I just have to tune to it.

Are you able to shut Spirit off?

When I don’t want to be tuned in, I just close off my energy. This works 95 per cent of the time.

Have you considered using your abilities to solve crimes?

I have, but right now, on this journey, I don’t feel aligned to that.

Do you ever surprise yourself with the accuracy of your messages?

Yes! I especially love it when the two people shared a special word or song and then Spirit reveals that word or title to me so I can relay it back to my client. It’s validation, for sure, but it is also a fun feather in my cap.

What’s next for you?

I’m continuing my mission of helping others through my social channels. I’m also in talks to write a book, and I love doing live events, so I’ll definitely be doing more of those! Look for me at a theatre near you.

Follow Travis Holp on Tik Tok @traviswarriorunicorn.

Social Media Star StanChris Just Wants To Brighten Up Your Day

The prominent gay YouTuber and social media creator has dedicated his platform to creating engaging LGBTQ+ content

Story and interview by Christopher Turner

Photos by MaxwellPoth

Social media star Chris Stanley, better known by his online alias StanChris, has been captivating and entertaining millions of fans on YouTube and across social media since he started posting online more than six years ago. Today Stanley’s content is all over the place. With more than two million followers across his platforms (including 432,000 on YouTube, 900,000 on TikTok, 340,000 on Instagram, 168,000 on Snapchat and 87,000 on Facebook), StanChris shares a seemingly endless number of comedic videos, memes, candid on-the-street interviews and body-positive videos, advocating for the LGBTQ+ community.

Born in 2000, Stanley began his social media journey back in 2018 (under his first online alias, “twinkstan”), focusing on all things queer from the very start. Things started off slowly as he simply started taking along his camera to film his adventures, with lots of involvement from his family. In the early days, his mother and

Let’s kick things off and talk about your alias, StanChris. How did things get started for you?

So, originally, my name was actually ‘twinkstan’ online, but I changed it because there was too much pressure to be this ‘perfect’ twink. Also, obviously I won’t be young forever. So I made it ‘StanChris’ because my name is Chris Stanley, and ‘stan’ is slang for being a huge fan of someone. It’s cute, clean and has double meanings, so I like it.

Who are a few of your faves on social media?

A few of my faves currently are worldofxtra, the mean gays, the old gays, Austin Show, King Asante, pattiegonia and iamgregorydillon.

You put your mic in front of a ton of people. Is there one story that has really stuck with you?

I interviewed one guy who was in the US army during ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ [the official US policy on military service for non-heterosexual people in effect from Feb. 28, 1994, until Sept. 20, 2011]. He told me about how after it got repealed, he kissed his boyfriend in full uniform, and the photo someone took of them went viral on the internet. I just thought of this one because he was so sweet, and his message was that it always gets better, which – no matter how many times the gays say it, it’s not enough because it is true and something I wish I’d believed more when I was struggling after coming out.

What’s the best thing about TikTok, or social media in general?

The best thing about social media is that my videos can be seen by so many people and brighten their days. I’ve gotten so many messages and DMs [from] people saying I helped them come out, I cheered them up, things like that, and it always makes me smile. One guy even sent a whole email about how he was in chemo and he would watch my videos every day and how it really helped him get through it. Brought a tear to my eye, and I’m just so thankful I have this opportunity to help people.

What’s the worst thing about TikTok, or social media in general?

The worst thing about social media is probably the random hate. People are so much more comfortable saying something behind a screen than they are saying it in person. So there are some pretty mean things out there.

younger brother were frequently featured in videos on his YouTube channel, exposing them not only to his own experiences as a gay man but to queer culture in general.

When the COVID-19 pandemic hit and dramatically changed our social media habits, Stanley was one of the first LGBTQ+ creators on TikTok to go viral…and it all skyrocketed from there. Now, after mastering the world of viral digital content, he is on to his next big thing with his involvement in the production of two queer short films.

We sat down with the adorable social media star for a wide-ranging conversation that covered everything from the highs and lows of social media, to his own role models, celebrity crushes, and much, much more.

What’s one piece of advice that someone gave you that has really made a difference to you?

The only person you can compare yourself to is yourself. It’s hard sometimes not to compare yourself to others. But that’s apples and oranges. There’s only one you.

When did you come out?

I came out when I was a sophomore in high school [15 years old].

And what was that experience like for you?

It didn’t go well. My core friend group at the time all ditched me except for one, and my entire school found out and made it into this huge big deal when it really wasn’t. I ended up quitting the soccer team. But I also started writing poems and stories with queer characters, so you know that old saying: One door closes and another one opens. Plus, it led me here to where I am today and for that I am thankful.

“ The only person you can compare yourself to is yourself. It’s hard sometimes not to compare yourself to others. But that’s apples and oranges. There’s only one you.”

You’ve recently been involved with the production of two queer short films. Can you tell us a bit about both projects?

Of course! So one is a short film set in Provincetown, Massachusetts, called Second Thought, that I made with my best friend Art just before Pride Month. I wrote, acted, produced and helped direct it. It’s about hookup culture and explores that sometimes relationships can be more fulfilling when you take things slow. It’s won four awards already and about a dozen nominations at film festivals. My audience really loved it too, so please do check it out! [Editor’s note: You can watch Second Thought on YouTube.]

The other one is a coming-of-age queer skateboarding romance called Scraps. It just had its premiere at Outfest in L.A. Right now we are working on the feature film that Scraps was mostly a proof of concept for. It’s written by Matthew Francis and Ryan Nordin. I helped with producing and marketing the film last summer when they filmed in Montana. It should be getting its online release in the next few months before eventually going up on YouTube. It’s a really great story, and being a queer skateboarder myself, I really resonated with the project, so I was very happy to help be a part of it when they asked me. Check out the Instagram: @scraps_movie for updates!

What is your advice to people who are looking to you as a role model?

My best advice is, if you want to do something, don’t give up and be consistent. It took me five years of making videos to get to where I am today, and the discrepancy from when I started versus now is HUGE. I kept learning and getting better, and I still am. But I posted consistently for five years, and most of the time, that’s what it takes to get good at something. So just don’t give up and if there’s something you want to do – start doing it and getting better!

Who do you consider a role model?

Right now I would say Troye Sivan, Matt Cullen, Taylor Swift and Daniel Levy.

Who is your celebrity crush?

Well, aside from my boyfriend [Stanley has been with his boyfriend, Bret, for the last three years], my celeb crush is Cameron Britton. I’m not sure what his sexuality is, but he’s very handsome.

If you weren’t taking over social media right now, what would you be doing?

Growing up, I always wanted to be a massage therapist or a pro soccer player – so maybe one of those two things.

What do you want people to know about you that they might not already know?

People always meet me and then say I’m a lot shyer in person than they thought I would be based on my videos. So I’m a shy boy :) But I still love when people say ‘hey’ to me in public.

Favourite TV show, movie and song?

TV show: Demon Slayer. Movie: Everything Everywhere All at Once. Song: “B2b” by Charli XCX.

What’s next for Chris Stanley?

What’s next for me is EVERYTHING! Haha, no but I will keep making more films, documentaries, [and] I have a song coming out July 18 with my friend Gregory Dillon. I want to look into modelling more. I want to travel more. Definitely LOTS of gay content coming up, so be sure to follow my socials! [Hint, hint: @stanchris, if you’re not already following him.]

by Steve Johnson

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO QUEER SIGNALLING?

Queer people have been innovating in fashion for decades, but now our styles have begun to go mainstream

By Hannah Mercanti

It was a warm summer in 2015 when I bought my first-ever flannel shirt. My parents shook their heads, watching as I buttoned it all the way up in the sweltering heat, letting it hang long and untucked from my denim shorts. For them, it was likely a liability that I would complain about being sweaty and hot in the near future – for me, it was the first glorious step in the direction of coming out and becoming who I really was.

That was the summer I began my foray into the world of lesbian fashion. Armed with whatever measly allowance I had saved up,

I browsed the internet in search of “gay girls clothes.” Within seconds, I was inundated with photos of women and gender nonconforming folks with undercuts in knee-length shorts, beanies, carabiners and my infamous flannel. I was obsessed with the idea that people like me would see me. It was almost like trying to gain entry into an exclusive club; hopefully, the other lesbians would correctly identify me, and we could enter into solidarity without having to speak a word.

It’s been some time since then, though. Fashion is becoming

Photo

less stringent. Take a look around, and you’ll see celebrated cis, straight, male celebrities walking the red carpet in dresses, and straight women with buzzed hair, eyebrow slits and androgynous swag rocking flannel.

Regardless of what my little 12-year-old brain thought, these things have never necessarily meant a person is gay. Fashion is fabric, which has no gender or sexuality inherently attached to it. As well, many queer people don’t dress according to these trends. However, some of these dressing choices and stereotypes have historically been used as a sort of guiding star to hint publicly at who was gay.

Fashion and sexuality have a long, complicated history attached to them, and what you choose to dress yourself with means much more than one might think. Things that were once borderline exclusive to the queer community have begun to enter the mainstream at a rapid pace. For example, take a look at the “crunchy granola girl” aesthetic on TikTok, which has tons of straight women dressed in flannels, beanies and carabiners. Or watch an episode of one of our favourite shows – Miss Maddy Morphosis from Season 14 of RuPaul’s Drag Race is notoriously straight. Nowadays, it’s no longer enough to look to see if a woman is wearing a flannel or if a man has some makeup and painted nails. Fashion is changing, and the way queer people dress and identify each other is, too.

“Dressing gay” is by no means a new phenomenon – it has actually been around for quite some time, though in most academic circles, it is typically referred to as signalling. An early example of queer signalling through fashion comes from none other than Oscar Wilde, who in the 1890s popularized the idea of gay men wearing green carnations on their lapels to signal their identity to other 2SLGBTQI+ people.

In a more recent example, the 1970s brought with it the infamous hanky code. Along with signalling yourself as a member of the community, the hanky code worked by communicating a person’s sexual interests to prospective partners by the colour of the hankies they wore. “There were a number of choices throughout the 1960s and ’70s in gay men’s apparel,” says Shaun Cole, an associate professor of fashion at the UK’s University of Southampton. “One option was to dress invisibly,” says Cole. This meant that people would dress conventionally and within the gender binaries of their time and society, but might enhance their look with small signifiers that were recognizable to members of gay subcultures or the community at large. “That might be something like different coloured ties, suede shoes, or a pinky ring.”

These signals provided queer people the opportunity to communicate with each other without fear of repercussion. In the late 20th century, homosexuality was still punishable by law in many Anglophone countries, and people who came out faced social consequences such as losing their jobs, families or contact with their children, or even facing imprisonment. Signalling was not necessarily about hiding your identity, but, as Cole puts it, many people did not want to be immediately visible as a homosexual person to the general public. “However,” he says, “people did not want to live in isolation very often. And so, we needed to find ways to find like-minded people.” Thus, signalling continued throughout the 20th century as a vital way for queer people to connect with and find each other.

These days, signalling just isn’t as prominent. One big reason for this is the rise of hookup apps like Grindr, Scruff or Tinder. Locrian, a non-binary kink and sex educator, points out that with these apps, queer people can link up with each other anonymously without having to meet face to face or put themselves at risk.

The decreased popularity of signalling through fashion could be one of the reasons gay fashion is becoming less exclusive. With less of a need to hide our identities, the need for standard dressing rules seems to be heading out as well. An article from Sartorial magazine points out that as traditional signalling has fallen out of fashion, new identifiers have popped up, albeit “less secret than they have been in the past.” These signifiers are something people outside of the community may not notice, but some in the community would recognize quickly – like short manicures on women, dangly earrings on male-presenting people, or certain types of haircuts, like mullets, shags or buzzcuts. However, many of these styles have been popularized and have spread out into the mainstream fashion world.

For some, the mainstreaming of queer fashion is one of the big turns in acceptance we’ve been waiting and fighting for. Jonathan Katz, an associate professor of practice (history of art) at the University of Pennsylvania, believes this mainstreaming is, on the whole, a good thing. In his eyes, we are achieving a long-time goal, saying that the mainstream acceptance of queer styles and fashions means “sexuality will no longer be constituted as a significant dividing factor among people.” The belief that, eventually, sexuality will not matter means that fashion that’s particular to queer people soon won’t matter either, and will instead be open for all to explore.

There are many people who disagree with Katz, though. People on social media feel – rightly – protective of our queer styles, and upset when things we have been doing for a very long time start to go mainstream. However, this is a “losing position,” Katz says, adding that the more we can generalize our attitudes, which includes our attitudes towards fashion, “the queerer the straight world becomes. And that’s been our chief goal.”

For Locrian, the mainstreaming of any trend can be good, to a degree. “But on the other hand, I do think it can be performative, particularly when you’re talking about a straight male celebrity wearing a dress on the red carpet.” While it is good – and, to an extent, hopeful – to see a world where people can just wear what they like, it can be a slap in the face to queer people. There are people in the community who have been dressing like this for decades, and it can be uncomfortable to see straight people lauded and celebrated for something they themselves are still being punished and assaulted for. “It’s almost expected for people to be like, ‘Oh my gosh, they’re so brave,’” says Locrian.

While they note it is cool to see Hollywood creating a larger platform for inclusive fashion, it seems to be open only to celebrities. “Regular Joe Schmo wearing a dress to the grocery store is a very different thing. I think we both know they probably won’t get applause. It’s going to be a lot of looks.”

It’s a strange double-edged sword. On one hand, haven’t we all been saying that fashion has no gender, and people should be able

to wear what they want and dress in a way that feels true to them? We have, and that stands true. But on the other hand, what right do we have to tell people how to dress if they aren’t in our community? “It’s a fine line,” says Cole. “Personally, I do sometimes feel a bit like, ‘Why are those straight boys all dressing like gay boys? What right do they have to take the things that we have?’”

“The fashion industry itself is sort of a queer way of seeing the world,” according to Christopher Breward, fashion historian and director of the National Museum of Edinburgh. He points to the fact that many subcultures, like sailors and leatherboys, were some of the driving inspirations for haute couture and mainstream runway looks “that very quickly get sold to teenagers more generally, start to get worn by pop stars on television, and I think we see the whole thing moved out into the mainstream.”

This idea highlights the fact that some of the people “dressing gay” may not even actually know they’re doing it; they are simply following trends that have been pushed into the mainstream, unaware that those trends were created by queer people. Breward also mentions another potential reason for the influx of straight people turning to gay fashion, which is that dressing queer brings you attention. Whether that’s good or bad is up to public opinion, but if a movie star turns up to a red-carpet event in a noticeably queer outfit, they are going to get talked about more than they would have if they had just “dressed straight.”

Those in the community who are looking for ways to dress queer and now find themselves at a bit of a standstill do not need to fear. One way to dress in a way that makes you feel like yourself while also directly supporting your community is to shop queer-run and queer-owned brands. Fashion houses owned and run by queer people often offer cuts of clothing that are gender-confirming or neutral, and offer many diverse designs – things that can connect wearers with their queerness and give them that same sense of community connection that old “gay trends” used to provide.

Designer Anthony Rogers, who runs their own label, And Our, knew when they started the brand that she wanted to market to the transfemme community. “But I’m also seeing that the femme lesbians love my work, and the really femme gay boys love my work,” says Rogers. The dresses Rogers makes are not stereotypically queer, beyond being very feminine. But the connection to the community that comes from the creation of the dress itself can make it a “queer item,” something that could make buyers feel just a little more gay when they wear it.

Hannah Yesmunt, queer designer and owner of Pocket Design Lab and Saint Andro Swim, says including queer people in the actual designing process is a great way to create community around fashion and a brand. “We hosted a guest fitting event and had people in the queer community come try on our swimsuits and give real feedback, like ‘I feel good in this’ or ‘I don’t know, this is too tight.’” By basing the actual product with queer people and their needs in mind, there is an opportunity to uplift the community and provide them with pieces they can feel comfortable and supported in. Beyond just the way the pieces look, the way they were created is inherently gay – ushering in a potential new era of what it means to partake in gay fashion.

Regardless of what some may be inclined to believe, this is not an entirely malicious takeover. Breward reminds us of an important feeling in our lives: pleasure. “Sometimes we forget the benefits of pleasure,” says Breward. “Some of the happiest times in my life have been in a club on the dance floor where you’re looking your best and are pushing the boundaries in terms of what you’re wearing.” Who says that feeling should be exclusive to our community?

“That ability to be who you are in the clothes that make you feel who you are – that should be accessible to everybody,” Breward continues. “Perhaps it is something that queer people have pioneered. And more people should have access to that feeling.”

As for allies dressing in this way? Rogers reminds them that while clothing has no gender attached to it, they would do well to remember, when dressing in styles that have been historically queer, to have some sense of empathy and forethought for where those styles have come from. She points out that trying to understand 2SLGBTQI+ history and the queer experience through listening to the community is a big part of allyship, “and if it comes through clothing and dressing up, and being a more exuberant version of yourself, I’m for it.”

Yesmunt points out that fashion is cyclical, and not everything worn by gay people can actually be claimed as our own. For many queer women, for example, one way to “dress gay” is by wearing clothes that are less feminine and form-fitting – think loose, baggy tops and cargo pants. But Yesmunt reminds us that that look wasn’t necessarily invented by queer femmes, and encourages us to take a step back. “Where did that oversized, baggy look come from? A lot of it comes from hip-hop street wear in the late ’70s and ’80s by a lot of Black communities.” Echoing Rogers, Yesmunt stresses that acknowledging the history of the styles you are wearing is incredibly important to the communities where they originate from.

The link between self-expression and fashion is hard to sever. How a person chooses to dress themselves is very personal, and is, for many people, an important facet of their confidence and self-expression. “It’s the first way in which people begin to make assumptions about us,” says Cole, “and so we are conscious of that.” Even those who claim to “not care” about how they dress are technically expressing themselves through their dress. In some ways, expression through fashion is no different for gay and straight people. But, as Cole points out, 2SLGBTQI+ people “want to be able to identify and communicate in some ways with other people who might be part of their communities or are like-minded in some ways.” For members of the community, fashion goes beyond selfexpression, and is rather an integral way to connect and find safety and community among new people.

As for queer people who are worried that the homogenization of fashion will separate them from their community, Breward has an important piece of advice: “Look at your heritage and take from that.” He points to the long, rich history of queer dress and fashion, dating back hundreds of years. “Continue to be brave,” he says, “and continue to push the boundaries. Because that’s what queer people have always done.”

Billy-Ray Belcourt,

Photo by Jaye Simpson courtesy of Penguin Random House

HANNAH MERCANTI is a freelance journalist and fact-checker based in Hamilton. They’re a graduate of Toronto Metropolitan University’s School of Journalism.

Photo by Enes Çelik

Should 2SLGBTQI+ People Always Forgive And Forget The Injustices They’ve Faced

“Forgiveness… is not merely irresponsible. It is a historical impossibility.”

By Paul Gallant

Not getting a deserved apology for a wrong can be very frustrating because the refusal can seem so calculated. The person refusing to apologize is ignoring or sidestepping the facts, being cruel, covering their ass, avoiding responsibility and liability. Just say it, damn it.

Forgiveness seems more ineffable. Even though studies have shown that forgiving is good for the forgiver, it’s harder to fake. We can say forgiving words – and even mean them – but still feel hardness in our heart, still distrust the apologizer, who, having been forgiven, can walk away with a spring in their step. Even if both parties agree on the facts, the harm mostly went one way, and not everybody has great skills at getting over lingering trauma.

Which is why I was intrigued by a recent paper written by Daniel

del Gobbo, an assistant professor at the University of Windsor’s Faculty of Law, a lawyer and an LGBTQ2 activist, titled “Reckoning with Queer History: The Canadian ‘LGBT Purge’ and the Limits of Forgiveness.”

Before I recap the historical background of what he’s writing about, let me give away the ending. Del Gobbo writes, “Forgiveness… is not merely irresponsible. It is a historical impossibility.”

So, the story, as I’ll paraphrase from del Gobbo’s paper, starts in Canada in the 1950s. Of course, 2SLGBTQI+ people had been oppressed and demonized in Canada before then, but this was the beginning of the federal government’s systematic attempt to remove people who were “sexually abnormal” – usually 2SLGBTQI+ –from the Canadian Armed Forces, the Royal Canadian Mounted

Police and the federal public service. To find these “worrisome deviants,” government agencies tapped the phones of individuals suspected of being queer, followed them after work hours, surveilled bars and nightclubs and set up traps to catch them in some sort of homosexual compromise. Once identified, del Gobbo recounts, suspects would be brought to undisclosed locations where they were harassed, intimidated and questioned for hours. Most colourfully and bizarrely, the Canadian government invented a device known as the “Fruit Machine,” which purported to determine a person’s sexual orientation by measuring the dilation of their pupils when shown images of half-naked bodies.

“The RCMP opened over 9,000 files concerning LGBTQ2 people by the late 1960s,” writes del Gobbo. “Given the early date of this estimate and the impacts of the government’s policies that transcended the experiences of [those] most directly affected, including family members, friends, individuals for whom no RCMP file was opened, and future generations of LGBTQ2 people, the total number of LGBT Purge victims is clearly much higher.”

Though the tactics mellowed over the decades, the military, with particular vehemence, discriminated against queer people until 1992, well after the decriminalization of homosexuality in 1969. It wasn’t until 1992 that a court case launched by Michelle Douglas (who had been forced out of the military for being “not advantageously employable due to homosexuality”) and mounting political pressure forced the government to lift its ban on openly 2SLGBTQI+ people serving in the military. So being gay was now (technically) okay…but what about the sore feelings from those 40 years of purging us? The lives knocked off course, the suicides committed out of desperation?

In 2015, with Justin Trudeau newly elected as prime minister, 2SLGBTQI+ activists started to call on the federal government to formally apologize and create a redress plan. A class-action suit was launched in 2016 by those who had been affected by the purge. In 2017, the government announced a legal settlement, and a teary-eyed Trudeau gave a seemingly heartfelt apology in the House of Commons. In his prepared statement, he said: “While we may view modern Canada as a forward-thinking, progressive nation, we can’t forget our past: the state orchestrated a culture of stigma and fear around LGBTQ2 communities. And in doing so, destroyed people’s lives.”

The global settlement was for $145 million, with up to $110 million of that earmarked for the payment of damages to LGBT Purge victims, according to the LGBT Purge Fund website. Some good will come of it. But back to the larger question: can money buy forgiveness? Del Gobbo has his doubts.

“In a civil lawsuit where a plaintiff and defendant reach a settlement out of court, it’s often the case that one party will ‘release,’ or legally forgive, the other party’s liability,” del Gobbo tells me in an interview.” By accepting the settlement, the class members of the lawsuit have effectively forgiven the government.”

But there is a gap between legal forgiveness and emotional forgiveness, between accepting a settlement and feeling like things have been made right. “Obviously, the law can’t force someone to

forgive another person emotionally. However, the law can pressure someone to forgive,” del Gobbo tells me. “In the Purge case, the law, government actors and various social forces combined to pressure the class members and other LGBTQ2 people to forgive the government, whether legally or emotionally.”

Pressured or not, the purge victims were vindicated and got some cash; as they age and die, their feelings won’t matter anymore. But it is these “other LGBTQ2 people” who must, now and in the future, grapple with an emboldened government that might think that, having done a good job with the purge apology, its job in reconciling with the community is done. Del Gobbo and other academics argue that Trudeau’s apology was too narrow, and failed “to recognize and properly atone for the complex ways that the government discriminated – and continues to discriminate – against queer and trans people.”

Today’s vulnerable communities – particularly Black, Indigenous and racialized people, trans individuals, persons with disabilities, low-income people, and others who continue to face barriers to full inclusion and acceptance – might not have been alive during the purge. They might not even know it happened. But they have demands and needs from a government that might boastfully declare it has ticked queer people off its to-do list.

It’s even more awkward when you consider that while an older generation was on the receiving end of the positive results of the apology-and-forgiveness process – their worst days are behind them – future generations may be faced with the negative results, a “didn’t we settle that already?” response when making further demands of government.

Yet it doesn’t have to be that way. I think del Gobbo’s notion of forgiveness being irresponsible and impossible doesn’t quite capture the reality of reconciliation. Just as one partner might apologize for one bit of relationship negligence – always forgetting the milk – and the other might forgive them, believing that they’ll do better, that process might repeat again and again for a series of apology-worthy events over the course of a relationship. Not doing the dishes, not walking the dogs, embarrassing their partner in public, unethical sexual behaviour. For couples in a dysfunctional relationship, the apology-and-forgiveness process might eat up most of their time together.

The purge settlement was not the be-all and end-all of the relationship between Canada’s government and its 2SLGBTQI+ population, especially those born after the purge and probably oblivious to the settlement. Outside of a perfect relationship –and what government has a perfect relationship with its people? – there will always be another grievance to work through. It’s up to community members themselves – not the government or the lawyers – to define injustices (plural) and to strike a course for setting things right. Trying to globally fix everything in one fell swoop usually results in nothing getting fixed at all.

In the war against injustice, every battle has its own players, rules and context. Even if the war is eternal and requires eternal vigilance, each battle should have an ending. Each battle needs an ending. Success helps, not hinders, the next one.

AJ McLean’s Journey To Getting Healthier Than He’s Ever Been

The “bad boy” of the Backstreet Boys has cleaned up his act. He chats with IN about sobriety, healthy routines, and why it’s more important than ever to be an ally to the LGBTQ+ community

By Karen Kwan

For much of the Backstreet Boys’ time in the spotlight, AJ McLean was – and some might say continues to be – the “bad boy” of the group. He has the most tattoos, his nails are always painted (he even has his own brand of vegan nail polish, called Ava Dean Beauty) and he’s the one who’s been known to party hard and has been to rehab.

But these days, McLean, 46, is much more than this bad-boy persona. His latest work? He’s a brand ambassador for Canadian non-alcoholic cocktail brand Atypique and he’s even shedding his rogue persona by going by his full name, Alexander James. We caught up with McLean while he was in Toronto with Atypique to learn more about his sobriety journey, his workout routine and how he takes care of his mental health.

In your journey to sobriety, I understand that Kevin [Richardson] was the first person who held an intervention? Yeah, back in 2001, there was a baseball game where we were supposed to be throwing the first pitch out. I partied like a rock star the night before and it was on our day off, and I decided that I wasn’t gonna do it. Kevin was not happy about that. Broke down the door to my room [when] he couldn’t get into my bedroom. I had double-bolted it. We exchanged words that I will not repeat – they are a little foul – but the most pivotal thing he said was, ‘I

will never trust you again, you are dead to me.’ So, I left from there and went straight into rehab.

I’ve been around three times. I kept trying to get it right on my own, which – if anyone is in the program, they know doesn’t work very well. It took my youngest daughter to really save my life a little over two and a half years ago. I went on a two-day bender and when I flew home, I went to give my daughter a hug and she wouldn’t hug me. She said, ‘You don’t smell like my daddy,’ and that was it. That was the turning point for me, and I have not looked back.

What do you wish more people understood about sobriety?

It’s a personal journey. It’s a personal choice: you can’t force someone to get sober, be sober, go to meetings, any of these things. You have to want it. And for some people, you have to hit rock bottom. I thought for years that I’d hit rock bottom, but I clearly never really did because I found a way to dig my way back up and, like I said, until this most recent kind of wake-up call…

The sober-curious movement is so pivotal right now because people that may not necessarily want to be completely sober, but also want to take a break from hard alcohol and maybe they’re not making the best life choices if they’re highly intoxicated, but they don’t want FOMO. They want to still feel like they’re able to be social, and now [with Atypique becoming available] you

Photos by Arthur Mola

don’t feel awkward because you have an amazing alternative. Honestly, I’ve tried a few mocktails at restaurants here and there, and they’re good, but not good, like, this good. Atypique has really nailed it on the head.

Besides not drinking, you’ve really overhauled your lifestyle in the past few years.

I was doing a few TV shows – I did Dancing With the Stars and I did RuPaul’s Secret Celebrity Drag Race – sober during all of this, but I wasn’t happy. So, I decided at the end of our DNA tour last May to go on a little self-discovery journey and I drove down to Scottsdale, Arizona. I admitted myself into an intensive outpatient program at a place called The Meadows for 10 weeks and did some real soul-searching.

What I learned and came out of that with is boundaries – I didn’t have those in my life; I let everybody kind of walk all over me –and authenticity, which is a huge one for me. I learned that AJ is a character in a band, which I’m very grateful for, but it’s also a job. It doesn’t define who I am, and Alex kind of got stifled for years. So now, that’s why everything I do solo now is Alexander James, and I want to kind of reintroduce the world to me outside of the group. So far, it’s been a very liberating and an incredible journey. And it’s going to be a lifelong journey. It’s never just going to be, ‘Oh, I’m fixed.’ It’s one day at a time.

With your healthy routine, what’s your diet like?

Yeah, I mean, so I decided to go gluten-free for a year. I’m not a big sugar guy, so that’s not a problem. I went grain-free as well. I love to cook and I do a lot of meal prepping.

Any signature dishes?

I love to cook pasta. I’m a big steak guy. I like to do overnight marinades and I’m starting to finally get into fish. I love sushi, yeah, but I wasn’t ever a big fish guy – you’ll never get me to eat salmon, never gonna happen. I can’t stand salmon. I love like white fish, tilapia, and I’ll season it – being Latin, I like a little spice. I’m just trying to eat clean but I also want to enjoy what I eat. I don’t want to go on one of these extreme diets of keto or this or that. You should be able to enjoy what you’re eating as long as you eat it in good portions and you stay healthy and active.

And what about your fitness?

I work out probably five to six days a week – full circuit training so every single workout is kind of a full body. Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays are predominantly upper body, and Tuesday and Thursdays are lower body but I still incorporate abs in there, and a little bit of cardio in all my workouts. During the pandemic, I picked up mountain biking with my brother-in-law: he’s taken it to the extreme, he’s doing like 20-foot gaps and jumps. I’m just doing some downhills and some street-riding – at my age, if I fall down, I might break something and not get back up! But I also want to set a good example for my daughters. Living a healthy lifestyle is not just necessarily being sober but also what you take into your body, whether it’s food or working out.

Do you have a self-care routine?

Self-care for me: meditation’s a big thing in the mornings, and a gratitude list, I do pretty much every single day. Reaching out

to friends and others that might be struggling – I do daily checkins with a lot of my sober friends every day and I check in with my sponsor every single day, multiple times a day. I just try to stay focused. I’ve kind of pushed all toxicity out of my life. And even though I’m going through a divorce, my ex-wife and I are still the best of friends and we’re learning our little new modern family and co-parenting. I’m spending as much time with my girls as I possibly can with a little bit of time off that I have here and there because I am still on tour with my buddy Joey Fatone, and then Backstreet’s doing a couple little spot dates this year, and I’ve been here with Atypique.

You’ve long been a big supporter of the LGBTQ+ community. Why do you think it’s more important than ever to be an ally? You know, unfortunately, there’s always been kind of a pushback ever since – I’m not a big political person, but obviously during the last [US] election, there were a lot of ugly things that surfaced and didn’t go away. You know, if you don’t understand something and you don’t agree with something, it doesn’t mean that you need to hate it. There’s too much hate in the world, there’s too much judgment in the world, and I will always be an ally for the LGBTQ+ community; my publicist is gay, I officiated the wedding for my two best gay friends. I did Drag Race – and I won by the way, yeah, so that’s a little zinger – and I had the greatest time. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

FASHIONABLE FORCES

Up close and personal with iconic gay fashion designer Pol’ Atteu and his husband, Patrik Simpson, who open up on their legendary collaborations, their multi-platform empire and the state of the red carpet

By Elio Iannacci

Photos by Farbod Jafarpour

Beverly Hills is teeming with cultural sites laden with secrets, scandal and 2SLGBTQI+ history. Madonna’s former estate on 9425 Sunset Boulevard, Joan Crawford’s old digs on 513 North Roxbury Drive and beaux-arts properties such as the Virginia Robinson Gardens (a favourite hideout for Marlene Dietrich) are spots that any self-respecting queer would have on his/her/their star-map. But those aren’t the only ones…

Those who love diving into L.A.’s stylish past may also know of a hidden gem on 9414 Dayton Way – designer Pol’ Atteu’s boutique and atelier. Atteu’s gowns, which have been worn by icons to housewives and stars to ingenues, have been on the city’s red carpets for more than 25 years and they transform his clientele with craftsmanship and grandeur – or, in his words, “make them feel like the queens they are.” His aesthetic doesn’t bow down to the latest Parisian or Italian catwalk trend or adhere to any of the minimalist monochromatic cues that New York Fashion Week typically preaches. Instead, Atteu is obsessed with travelling to the far reaches of glamour in his designs, finding inspiration in his own backyard or on his travels with husband/partner Patrik Simpson (they’ve covered 72 countries so far).

As the duo’s podcast (Undressed) and Amazon Prime TV series (Gown and Out in Beverly Hills) can attest, running a Californian couture business in the middle of the world’s largest entertainment/ streaming capital is anything but boring. While surrounded by an atelier brimming with tulle, silk, appliqué and sequins, Atteu and Simpson took a break between celebrity fittings to talk about Atteu’s influential collaborations with Hollywood and reality TV royalty.

“ When I take their measurements, that’s where the magic happens. We have a conversation during the whole process and things usually get very intimate. I’ve had some clients tell me about how their husband cheated on them…and, of course, many clients have insecurities about clothes.”

What are the first questions you ask someone who walks into the boutique or a celebrity that you are working with?

POL’ ATTEU: I need to know when and where the dress will be worn – the event, the date, the season – but when I take their measurements, that’s where the magic happens. We have a conversation during the whole process and things usually get very intimate. I’ve had some clients tell me about how their husband cheated on them, or that they have nightmares and trauma about wearing the colour red, and, of course, many clients have insecurities about clothes.

So many designers dislike filming what goes on in their atelier. Why did you allow a film crew to set up cameras in your boutique for Gown and Out in Beverly Hills?

PATRIK SIMPSON: We thought it was a good idea for people to see a behind-the-scenes look into fashion – how a gown is conceived and actually put together. Project Runway focuses on a little of the construction, but those are up-and-coming designers. No one has really gone into the atelier of someone experienced like Valentino, seeing him sketch, sew, and hand-bead the garment himself. I produce and co-create the show with Pol’– who has such a connection with his clients that it makes for amazing TV. We just keep experimenting together and so we keep redefining the show in each episode.

Were your parents somehow associated with fashion?

POL’: Oh, no. I was born in Kuwait and moved to L.A. when I was seven. Tailors would tailor, alter, adjust or make [my mother’s] clothes. I watched the whole process closely but had no clue that would be my destiny.

When did you first know you wanted to be in fashion?

POL’: [My family] moved to the US and I saw The Love Boat on TV. It was the episode where Julie, the cruise director, organized a fashion show on the boat. I was 12 and wouldn’t stop talking about it. My family just shut it down. It wasn’t until the 11th grade that I finally said it out loud: ‘I want to be a designer.’ I tried to attend FIT [New York’s Fashion Institute of Technology] first but I couldn’t afford it and my family would not pay for it, so I went to the Los Angeles Trade Technical College.

Let’s talk about the most transformative moments in Gown and Out. Which one stands out?

POL’: Shobna Gulati. She was in Everybody’s Talking about Jamie, the movie on Prime Video, and the stage play of it was here in L.A. She’d never been on a Top Five best-dressed list and she’s been an actress for so long. She’d never worn a gown or had a fitting before meeting us [when she] had to go to the BAFTAs [the British Academy Film and Television Arts Awards].

PATRIK: I’d say the episode when Mackenzie Hancsicsak from This is Us was on. She was a child. She had never worn a dress to a red carpet or been on one, and she was a tomboy. Pol’ made her feel like a princess. I saw this plus-size 10-year-old have confidence in her eyes, and I was so proud of him at that moment.

Patrik Simpson (left) and Pol’ Atteu

How does something like glamour help a life?

POL: When I see women look at themselves in the mirror after wearing the right dress – the way Shobna did – I get emotional. That’s my moment and theirs. They see a side of themselves that they either forgot, had lost, hadn’t seen before, or are excited to revisit.

Much of the work that queer designers and artists do with women in entertainment gets dismissed or uncredited. When you look back in history to the power of a creative union like Grace Jones and Keith Haring, do you think we need to reassess the importance of collaboration?

POL’: Exactly. If you’ve done your homework, you realize that it’s not just a dress and fashion is not silly or something to write off. It’s a powerful tool. These collaborations evoke so many different life moments that represent many personal or professional transitions that shouldn’t be overlooked. A dress isn’t just a dress for me – it represents where you’re going in your career, and it should represent you in the best possible way. It also represents how I see you, where I’m going and how I’m developing as a designer.

So you see designing as a combined testament of your client and your own life?

POL’: Absolutely. I worked with Betty White in 2010 [when she was close to 90 years old]. It was on a dress she wanted for the SAG [Screen Actors Guild] Awards because she was getting a Lifetime Achievement honour. Right away, she understood what the collaboration meant to us both. When she saw the fabric as I rolled it out, she lit up. She sat and watched me sew it and was really getting into the creative way I would mould the fabrics on her body. Afterwards, she said, ‘You re-energized my career with your dress.’ She had a slit up the dress and said, ‘Oh no, honey, I’m an old lady,’ until she tried it on and I said, ‘Girl, when you got legs like that, you have to show them.’

The first time I recognized your work was on Wheel of Fortune. They did a 10-day tribute to your work and had Vanna White wear your gowns. What impact did dressing her have on you?

POL’: She’s a friend now and I love her, but I grew up on Wheel of Fortune. A lot of people think, ‘Oh, she’s just flipping letters,’ but she embodied elegance on TV. Her movements and gestures and the way she glides back and forth on that stage is magic. It doesn’t distract; it pulls you in. People watched Vanna White to see what she was going to wear next – it was aspirational. Remember, she was working well before reality shows, Housewives or fashion shows streamed online. Her role was being herself, and people wanted to emulate that. My bestselling piece of all time was when I put her in a green panne velvet number. I sold a million of that one dress.

PATRIK: I think Vanna White made Wheel of Fortune into her own personal runway. She made it not just some boring game show – she made it fashionable and never wore the same dress again.

Anna Nicole Smith was one of your most famous clients and closest friends. What would you say is the most iconic memory you have of her?

POL’: She’s buried in my dress and today is the anniversary of her death, so I’m glad we are talking about her. I once made her

a gown in two hours for the VH1 awards. She wasn’t going to attend and then decided last minute that she would. Nothing in the boutique fit her.

PATRIK: Luckily, Pol’ had this beautiful Italian Lycra bathing suit material. He pulled it out and made a dress for her with cutouts in it. She was named best dressed!

Did you ever see any runway designers use your dresses as inspiration?

POL’: If you go back to some of the clothes that I did for Vanna and Anna Nicole, you’ll notice how different reiterations started popping up on the runway. When I put Anna Nicole’s dress in the window, so many designers sent people to come take pictures and duplicate it. I thought that was the highest compliment for me.

What would you say has been the most challenging fitting for you?

PATRIK: I can answer that! He did the Dubai Housewives reunion gowns last year for Bravo and had to do virtual fittings. We couldn’t make it to Dubai and they were supposed to come here. We shipped it overnight and they somehow lost the dress. They couldn’t find the address.

Your podcast is a series of conversations with notable people. Did you want your podcast to mirror the intimacy you have during fittings?

PATRIK: Yes. That’s why we named our podcast Undressed

with Pol’ and Patrik. Our very first guest was Scheana Shay from Vanderpump Rules—Pol’ did her wedding gown and so it was very unfiltered because we know so much about her. I think guests on the show open up because Pol’ and I are like the two gay best friends they never had.

POL’: I see them naked all day, so it is easier for them to feel comfortable when we chat.

How have you seen the fashion industry change with regard to the red carpet?

POL’: Many brands now just hire the celebrities to represent [them], and these stars don’t necessarily like what they’re wearing. A redcarpet moment for a star can be very artful, and I think you should wear something you love or that is from someone you love and collaborated with. A brand shouldn’t overshadow a personality; it should enhance it and support it.

PATRIK: I’ve been very disappointed with a lot of the stylist looks on the red carpet because – even at the Emmys or Oscars – there were so many celebrities wearing these beautiful gowns that weren’t fitting them properly because obviously they hadn’t done a fitting. Pol’ thinks that is so important and will find the time to fit them.… Once he even did a fitting in a parking lot!

Who was that?

POL’: I can’t tell you who she is, but I was on the phone and told her to pull over and I drove to her with a tape measure. It was a big night for her.

Your relationship fuels so much of your work. Do you see your personal life evolving with your professional one?

POL’: We’ve been together over 20 years now and so that is a lot of collections. But when you look at where we started and how there was no gay marriage back when we first dated, we are so thankful for the struggles that everybody else before us had to go through to allow us to be able to get to this point of our lives together. When you have a great, solid relationship, that’s how you can grow and flourish, and give back to your community.

Do you ever look back and think some of your ideas were too ahead of the curve?

PATRIK: When we raised our daughter, we filmed our very first reality show. It was called Designer Family and it was about us, two gay men raising a teenage daughter in Beverly Hills. It was for Bravo, but it didn’t get picked up because we were told America wasn’t ready for that. Two years later, Modern Family was on TV.

POL’: We pitched the show to Logo and they told us we were too gay for it! They’re like, ‘No, we want gay adjacent.’ I don’t think we were too early. I think that people will never be ready for change – you just have to show it. Part of not following trends is being honest to yourself. I think we’ve been able to evolve because we live truthfully.

What has been the most recent example of reaping the rewards of being as outspoken as you are?

POL’: We just made history. We were the first gay couple on the

cover of a national magazine in Dubai called Victor. They’ve never had a gay person on the cover – let alone a gay couple on the cover. My only hope now is that that kind of visibility will change lives or change people’s minds.

“A dress isn’t just a dress for me – it represents where you’re going in your career, and it should represent you in the best possible way.”

ONE SIZE FITS ALL

Pre-packing a toiletry bag with all the right stuff may just change the way you travel

By Adriana Ermter

“Packing a carry-on bag’s toiletries for a two-week vacation in Mexico, a 24-hour business trip to New York City or (insert your next destination here) is my favourite part about travelling”… said no one ever. Which makes the idea of having a pre-made kit – one that contains all the essentials and is tucked beneath the bathroom vanity ready and waiting to be tossed into carry-on luggage, regardless of where you’re going – sound like the dream. Particularly if you’re a chronic over-packer, or always seem to be organizing your toiletries five minutes before you’re due to leave for the airport. It’s curse worthy.

“When you pack at the last minute, you likely will lack confidence that you have packed everything you’ll need,” notes Hitha Palepu, in her book How to Pack: Travel Smart for Any Trip. “Prepacking is where your adventure begins. It’s not when you step off the plane or out of the car; it’s here, it’s now. With planning.”

Maybe it’s presumptuous to think that people need guidance selecting their favourite shampoo, moisturizer and deodorant for an in-flight carry-on bag. Yet since 9/11, Canadian Air Transportation Safety Authority (CATSA) and the United States’ Transportation Security Administration (TSA) rules regarding what you can and cannot bring onboard an aircraft have undergone significant changes, and continue to change, largely due to evolving security concerns and technological advancements.

Gone are the days of mindlessly throwing a full-size cylinder of hairspray or bottle of cologne into a backpack to stow in the overhead bin. CATSA rules dictate that each passenger is allowed only a single one-litre bag to carry their liquid items in-flight, with each product restricted to being no more than 100 mL each in size. Consequently, choosing your carry-on toiletries

requires thought and preparation. “Toiletries are the things that make us look and feel good (probably even more so than clothes!) and when we’re travelling, we want both of those things,” explains Jennifer Weatherhead Harrington, a travel expert and the host of Next Destination. “No one wants to look or feel tired and blotchy, have frizzy or flat hair, or have a breakout while on vacation. So, when it comes to narrowing down what to take, it can be tricky because you always feel like ‘What if this happens to my skin, or my hair?’” With a little know-how, however, pre-packing what you need can be a time- and stress-saver in the long run.

APPLY THE TWO-BAG RULE

Rule of thumb: stop trying to fit everything from your lip balm to your aftershave and mouthwash into one plastic carry-on bag. You’ll need two: one for your liquid-based toiletries and another for your solid products. Keeping these items separate creates organization and facilitates efficiency when your luggage goes through the X-ray scanner at airport security. Just make sure to avoid having random items roaming free in your suitcase. “Your toiletries should always be contained – this is where leaks and explosions tend to happen,” observes Palepu. “And those can ruin a trip!” While the liquid bag’s size is mandatory (no more than one litre), popping it inside a larger, clear, resealable plastic bag is a smart way to double up on leakage prevention.

PRIORITIZE YOUR LIQUID PRODUCTS

What no plastic bag can prevent, however, is product overflow. “The key to taking less with you is scaling back on your routine,” advises Weatherhead Harrington. “Let’s say you have a 12-step skincare routine.… How can you minimize that? Is there a product you can use that does double duty (moisturizer and sunscreen in one, a tinted lotion so you don’t need foundation, a multi-purpose hair serum that repairs and heat protects), or is there a way you can cut out steps altogether? In most cases, your skin or hair isn’t going to drastically change in one to two weeks, so keep the essential parts of your routine and nix the added bonuses.”

According to the TSA, you can bring a range of favourites on board, inclusive of aerosols, gels, creams and pastes, so select the ones you use most frequently. Travel-size shampoo and conditioner bottles or squishy plastic sample packets fit this bill and should always be in your carry-on toiletry bag…as should your favourite face and body moisturizers, sunscreens and shaving creams. Simply squeeze or spoon the products from their full-size containers into empty miniature bottles for travel. If you’re strapped for space and staying at a hotel where many toiletries are provided, leave these items at home.

“Whatever is the most important to you, bring,” adds Weatherhead Harrington. “Anything else is a bonus, and if you’re travelling with a partner who has extra toiletry space, use theirs.”

IDENTIFY YOUR NON-LIQUID ESSENTIALS

Grab a second plastic bag (size is optional; these items are solid) and load it up with your non-negotiable solid items, like a hairbrush or comb, dental floss, toothbrush, toothpaste in tablet form, bar soap, bar facial cleanser and stick deodorant. These are the good-hygiene products you need to feel and smell clean, fresh and comfortable. To create more room in this bag, swap your regular toothbrush

for a foldable version, pack the exact number of toothpaste tablets you’ll need for each day away, and opt for a gentle hydrating and cleansing bar soap you can use on both your face and body.

“When it comes to makeup and beauty products, I swear by stick formulas,” adds Weatherhead Harrington. “First of all, they’re not going to spill or break in your carry-on and cause a mess. Second, they can usually do double duty (lip, cheek and eye). And third, they don’t count as toiletry liquids. Think about that with skin care, too. Balms or solids don’t count as liquids, and sheet mask packets also don’t count – they’re all ways to give your skin extra hydration and love without taking up that key liquid space.”

Earplugs and a reusable water bottle are two other must-pack items, as they can provide a better sleep and ongoing hydration, helping you look and feel fresh and well rested. “No moisturizer can replace that!” enthuses Weatherhead Harrington.

TRAVEL PACKING DOS AND DON’TS

DO:

 Pack miniature-size bottles: “Go to a drugstore (US ones are amazing for selection), Sephora, Ulta, department stores, etc. and look for trial or mini travel versions of your absolute favourites,” advises Weatherhead Harrington, “from fragrance (I use free samples from Sephora all the time) and mini face cleansers to toners, mousse and dry shampoos.”

 Pack multi-use products: They save space and meet multiple needs.

 Follow CASTA/TSA guidelines: This ensures a smooth security-check experience.

 Use refillable containers: “If you can’t get your favourite products in mini versions, find refillable toiletry containers,” says Weatherhead Harrington. “I like ones that are squeezable in tube form so you can get as much product out as possible or a small pot container, so it’s easy to scoop out all the product.”

 Label your refillable bottles: This prevents mix-ups and makes identification easier.

DON’T:

 Overpack: Stick to essentials to avoid having to check your bag and incur baggage fees.

 Forget a leak-proof bag: This prevents spills from damaging your luggage.

 Use full-size products: They’re bulkier and may exceed liquid limits.

 Neglect personal preferences: Bring items that suit your skin and hair type. “Honestly, using a bar of soap at a hotel to wash your face just won’t do or could even cause issues with your skin,” says Weatherhead Harrington.

 Pack a shaving razor: It’ll get confiscated at airport security; you can pick up disposable ones at drugstores when you arrive at your destination.

Game On In Vienna

EuroGames 2024 celebrated unity in diversity, with a rainbow of athletic talent and a whole lot of glitter

By Doug Wallace

Opening Ceremonies (photo by Martin Darling)

Vienna doesn’t really need an excuse to show the gays a good time, having been a landmark city for progressive thinkers with respect to sexuality since the late 19th century. But the 2024 EuroGames – a multi-sports event celebrating diversity in sexual orientation, sex characteristics and gender identity – definitely took the torte.

Starting with a turn for the wurst – Conchita Wurst, that is. Who better to headline opening night at the Karlsplatz town square than this Austrian singer, drag queen and LGBTQ+ advocate? No one will ever forget the magnitude of that famous beard when she won the Eurovision Song Contest in front of 195 million TV viewers in 2014. The song wasn’t bad, but the big win was truly for the global queer representation.

Similar to the Gay Games but different in both scope and regional focus, the EuroGames have a simple goal: to create a safe place for people to come together to play sports, regardless of orientation, identity, age or skill level. It has been held annually since 1992, except in years when the Gay Games are held, which are every four years.

“Sport unites us all,” said Markus Ornig, a member of the Vienna State Parliament, during an opening ceremonies event. “And the EuroGames show that Vienna is a place where everyone can live freely. Enjoy the fact that you are – in the next few days – not a minority on the edge of society. You are in the spotlight.” It’s always nice to hear these kinds of words coming from the mouths of politicians.

This year, about 3,000 registrants took part in 31 sports – ranging from racquet sports, swimming and rowing, volleyball and basketball, to bridge, chess, climbing and roller derby. The variety seems enlightening, almost toning down the seriousness that competition can generate. Canada was well represented, with 21 Canadian athletes taking part in 11 sports, including volleyball, swimming, track and field, tennis and more.

Not only did my head spin off with all this sports immersion – the fittest people everywhere you look – I also got a chance to check out Vienna’s queer culture.

This is a city that since 2015 has had same-sex pedestrian-crossing lights – some two men, others two women, each with little hearts – for both Stop and Go. Other European cities like Hamburg, Frankfurt and Madrid have installed similar lights. Vienna was an early tackler of discrimination, establishing the Vienna Anti-Discrimination Centre for LGBTIQ Affairs (WASt) in 1998. And given the forthrightness of stars like Conchita and drag queens like Candy Licious, it’s no wonder that Vienna’s annual Rainbow Parade plays out in the opposite direction to regular traffic on the renowned Ringstrasse boulevard.

“I think that spending 12 hours in heels is a really good sport!” Candy Licious told me with a few big blinks and a breathless laugh. As a member of the EuroGames organization team, she was definitely heels-on-the-ground – and I’d swear she’s 10 feet tall. “I’ve been doing workshops with some of the leads at the different sports venues about what is gender, what is discrimination,” she said. “I work with people outside of the bubble and give them the opportunity to ask me: what does it mean to be queer or non-binary? What does Pride mean? What does LGBTQ mean? In order to teach companies not to ‘rainbow wash’ things.”

Candy Licious has been part of Vienna’s queer community for more than 10 years now, volunteering and participating in numerous outreach programs. “I work with an organization that helps LGBTQ refugees and I’m also a sex educator,” she said. “I also go to schools and do workshops with children about sex education. My whole life revolves around equality. Our rights are not set in stone. That’s why I’m doing what I can.”

The Café Savoy (photo by Doug Wallace) Kaiserbrundl Pool (photo by Wien Tourismus/Julius Hirtzberger)

I went to a bathhouse…and kept my clothes on the whole time You wouldn’t think a morning tour of an empty bathhouse would be that interesting, but you’d be wrong. On a gay walking tour – yes, that exists – the first stop was the Kaiserbrundl Men’s Sauna, built in 1889. Just us and the cleaners.

This super-famous bathhouse, in operation as a gay sauna since 1990, is pretty big at 1,700 square metres across four floors. It’s more of a social club than a bathhouse, really, complete with a bar and restaurant. But it is the architecture and artwork that make it part of the grand tour, the Moorish style lending a Moroccan, labyrinthian feel.

Scandalously, one of the royal Habsburgs was a regular visitor back in the day when the spa was frequented by everyone. Archduke Ludwig Viktor, the youngest brother of Emperor Franz Joseph I, was apparently slapped by another patron for unwelcome touching. “Luziwuzi,” as he was known, was thereafter banished to Salzburg. Such was royal life in the late 1800s.

Be sure to spend some time in Vienna’s gaybourhood near the Naschmarkt – the night market, which connects the 4th and the 6th districts of the city. We wandered the market and the shops around Gumpendorfer Street, before popping into The Café Savoy to power

Same Sex Traffic Lights (photo by Julius Hirtzberger)

Candy Licious (photo by Doug Wallace)

Conchita Wurst (photo by Isabella Busch)

up with some lunch. Vienna has been a pioneer in coffeehouse culture since the mid-1600s, and this now-gay hotspot looks very much like it did when it opened in 1896. I mean, the mirrors have to be the largest outside of Versailles.

We also managed a spin through the Albertina Modern Museum – there are so many excellent art museums in Vienna, it would take a week to visit them all properly. We settled for The Beauty of Diversity, a show comprising mainly women and LGBTQ+ artists that lends visibility to the marginalized and the divergent, with a mix of styles and media. A couple of hours flew by, the equal-rights themes conveniently blending right in with the EuroGames credo.

My highlight of the sporting events came with a morning on the Danube River taking in the rowing. The scene was so romantic and summery. And we were watching the event from a boat ourselves, trying to stay out of the way – and failing, the wind blowing us almost too close to the action a couple of times. We pitched up at the dock of the Vienna Rowing Club to let even more of the EuroGames camaraderie rub off on us. Hanging out with athletes always makes me feel sporty, the rowing singlets an added bonus, of course.

While the Paris Olympics served up quite the show – feats of physical skill and nerves of steel – the Vienna EuroGames and its sense of inclusion and acceptance gets my vote any day.

Vienna Rowing Club (photo by Doug Wallace)

Albertina Museum (photo by Doug Wallace)

FLASHBACK

PrideVision TV, Canada’s First LGBT+ Channel, Launches (September 7, 2001)

September 7, 2001, saw the launch of PrideVision TV, Canada’s first LGBT+-focused 24-hour cable television channel. It was the world’s second LGBT+ channel, following in the footsteps of the Gay Cable Network in the United States, which was established in 1982 in New York City and wound down operations in 2000–2001.

PrideVision TV was created by Headline Media Group Inc., and launched that fall with a lineup of lifestyle and entertainment programs created specifically for gays and lesbians, including dramas, comedies, feature films, documentaries, talk shows and even pornographic films (which only aired nightly after 12:00 am Eastern Time). The pornographic programming didn’t help build an audience and stirred controversy when Shaw Cable and Star Choice refused to offer PrideVision TV during the three-month free preview period, citing concerns over content. PrideVision appealed to the Canadian Radiotelevision and Telecommunications Commission (CRTC), arguing the exception was discriminatory, and won.

Still, the channel struggled to build a sizeable audience across the country and lost millions because of high-cost programming commitments, limited subscriber revenue and weak advertising, all which led to eventual cutbacks that eroded its programming.

Despite PrideVision’s woes, in late 2003 veteran broadcaster William Craig (a former employee of the CRTC who ran a series of regional sports networks in the United States) signed a deal to buy the struggling specialty television station. Finally, in February 2005, it was officially announced that PrideVision would drop its adult programming and relaunch as OUTtv in March 2005. Over the years, OUTtv has been owned by a number of different investors. However, today OUTtv marches on and is available to residents of Australia, Canada, New Zealand, South Africa and the United States, airing a variety of popular TV series, documentaries and movies from all over the world as well as original LGBTQ2+focused productions which are exclusive to the channel.

IN Magazine is grateful to our corporate and community partners who together, through their generous financial and in-kind support, contribute to our mission of celebrating and elevating Canada’s 2SLGBTQI+ communities 365 days a year.

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