Jack Swan Issue #93 by Jack Swan

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LITTLE INTRO

We've managed to keep the players we want, offload (with respect) those that we don't and have brought in a few good signings. There's a good feeling. Although, as all swans fans know, this could change in a heartbeat and may well have done by the time you are reading this. Having a clear game plan and direction makes a massive difference to any club. Manchester United and Liverpool, Man City and Chelsea have shown this over the last few years. When you have a club and a manager that knows the style it wants to play football then the players you sign fit into that. What we need to seriously prepare for now is post-Martyn. We are moving out players that don't fit his style, bringing in those that do. On the whole, I'm massively in favour of a manager having that power and I trust the gaffa. The issue is when he inevitably leaves. He's been linked with a few clubs already; I'd hope that we have a very successful season coming up and next season he will be more than happy remaining at the swans in the Premier league. What happens though if we lose in playoff final and he's offered a Premier league club? This summer transfer window was always going to be important. But the club needs to decide that this is our style of play, this is our formation and the players we want. The next manager should be one which follows this ideology. If not, what we will see is a future 'crucial transfer window' where the next manager will offload those that don't fit their style (the ones we are signing now) and so on. Klopp doesn't play too differently to Brendan. The players who the German inherited could do what he wanted. Mourinho, Van Gaal, Ole and Moyes all had different ways of playing and each saw players that didn't suit, wasting millions and millions of pounds each manager. The club, with its new young head of football or whatever he’s called, needs to get a shortlist together now of which managers play in a similar way to Russel. Hopefully it won't be needed for many years, but history teaches us that we are likely to be looking for a new man in the next twelve months. It's mad to think it's July and football is around the corner. Going to be a weird season. I'm confident though. Top 2???

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THE PAUL REID INTERVIEW In 2002, the Swans signed Paul Reid; an experienced left-winger who had played at a far higher level than where we were languishing at the time. Like many before and after him, Paul fell in love with the area and has lived here ever since. I caught up with him to talk about his time here, both playing and coaching in the academy. You had a playing career where you’ve played nearly 600 matches over 20 seasons. What has been you’re playing pinnacle? I’m going to have to say Huddersfield, with Neil Warnock. The 1994/95 season. I signed for them after they played Swansea in Wembley the season before. I was captain all season, and we got promoted through the play-offs. Although I missed out on all the playoff games. I’d played 42 games all season but missed the 2 plays offs and the final through injury. I made my league debut for Leicester in the topflight in 1987 which was obviously right up there. Playing alongside Alan Smith, Gary McAllister, I actually had a one-on-one chance with Peter Shilton. That was the old First Division but the highlight for me was that season with Huddersfield. Nick Cusack signed you for the Swans in the summer of 2002. How did the deal come about? I had been playing regular for Bury until I had been suspended and then I couldn’t get back in the team. They were struggling financially and I was 34 and one of the higher paid players and so the manager got me in and said we cant afford another year.

I was all set to go to Burton Albion, but Andy Feeley called me in and said that he had a phone call from Nick and asked if I fancied it. Swansea always had good support, I’d always had banter from the North Bank when I’d played there, it was a good club in my eyes and a chance to carry on in the football league. I spoke to Nick who offered me a 1 year contract, the money wasn’t great but the chance to continue in the football league was too good to turn down. I only played 20 games, but I scored on my league debut and I managed to captain the team and so although brief I have good memories. Before agreeing, we met Nick in Killay, he lived in Caswel. When you go to Swansea as an away team, you go down the M4, passed the centre, the prison and then to the Vetch and then you go home. Your impressions of Swansea aren’t always great. Nick showed us Killay, The Gower and all around there, into Mumbles, Newton Road etc.. me and my wife said that “we’ve got to come here; the kids will love it.” That was twenty years ago, and we are still here; the kids are grown up Swans fans now. Nick had a strict rule that each player would only have a 1 year deal at the time. (Mumf being the exception.) Did that work? Obviously, we struggled I don’t know. We had a couple of injuries early on which hurt the season. Jason Smith being a big one. He got injured, whether he could have played on or not I don’t know. I don’t want to say people didn’t want to play for Nick but I did wonder whether he could have battled through. With a one-year deal, you are always fighting but for whatever reason, it didn’t work for Nick. Flynn came in, made me captain and he then bombed me out with no explanation.

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That’s football, I kept trying, I supported the club but there comes a time when you want to be playing. I always thought I wanted to play. That’s what it was like, 35 at the time. I asked him why he left me, he said “I got someone in on loan (Bradley Maylett) and they needed to get someone out and so they terminated my contract. Out of work and a week later I started for the Royal Mail. Brian Flynn did a lot of good stuff for the Swans but you’re not the first ex-player to tell me that. Do you hold ill-feelings towards him? I have got some hard feelings towards Flynn, but he’s a manager and they have their own way. I think he could have been more upfront and talked to me tidy instead of not saying anything to me. I don’t really hold that much of a grudge, but he did finish my career and he certainly could have dealt with it better. Hope you don’t mind me asking you this but what is it like as a footballer, getting older, coming to the end of the career and assumingly going backwards. Is it hard to turn up at the Vetch, with 3000 fans, shit training facilities, division 3 etc… after experiencing so much more? Not really, I’ve always been self-motivated not by things off the field. I was at Bury where the facilities were shocking. Leicester was more upmarket, Huddersfield the same but Bradford was not really the best. I’ve played in all places; it is in my nature just to get on with it. People moan now that the grass is too long, too wet or there is a divot on the pitch. Players now are spoilt. In my day, you had to work hard to get

associate schoolboys, you had to work hard to get an apprenticeship, a contract. And it was installed into you. Now they are given too much too early. Some players at the under 21s, they’d turn up with flash cars, Rolexes, and they’d never played a professional game of football. But Swansea wasn’t that bad, we trained at the old Morfa, at Fairwood, in some ways they were better facilities than at Bury. The crowd was similar too. Was it hard leaving Swansea, not the club as such but leaving the English football pyramid? It was. I was really gutted that my career had come to an end. I didn’t go off the rails, but I spent a lot of time in the pub and gambling. I had to work. I hadn’t earned enough not to have a job. It was hard to get out of the system. I left and went straight to Carmarthen which was a bit different. And then quit and concentrated on coaching. I’d always been into coaching from a young age. It was hard. You see ex-professionals like Lee Hendry saying how hard it was for them, but I don’t think even they understand what it was like for players like me and my era. What we had to deal with, as we didn’t have the money for retirement. We went and got a real job. Don’t get me wrong they were more talented players than me, but you do get depressed. I know a few players who have been really depressed, I know a player who tried to kill himself on a number of occasions. It is hard, I won’t say otherwise. Is it hard having been a hero to some, in the spotlight, to

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suddenly being ‘normal’ in a normal job with everyone else? I never thought I was bigger or better than anyone else. That was always installed in me by my dad. He said to me never refuse an autograph because when you finish playing, nobody will ever want it. I’ve been level-headed throughout my career, I always wanted to, it’s in me from my council estate upbringing. I’m the same as everyone. Still the same person. I used to hate it when I was at Leicester, we used to go out and if there was a massive queue for a nightclub then I used to hate walking to the front. I’d rather queue. If I went on my own then I’d wait and when I got to the front they would say that I ‘could have just gone to the front’. But when there was a group of us then the others all wanted to go straight to front and I hated it. It is what it is, you just have to deal with it, you get a few that are up their own ass but I’ve tried to be level and speak to people. When I was coaching in the academy, they would come and have a pre-match meal and something that sticks in my mind is me waiting at the top of some stairs and 3 of the foreign lads walked up. I waited at the top and not one of them said thank you. Straight after that was Nathan dyer and Tom Carroll and both said ‘cheers’. I know Andrew Mumford is an advocate of the Welsh League. He’s told me how he’s played in European competitions etc.. how did you find it? I didn’t get the same buzz. Having played professionally for so long, I’m not dissing the league because there are good players there, but I wasn’t comfortable. I just didn’t feel like I enjoyed it. I did it for an extra bit of cash, I wasn’t making much at the Royal Mail. I obviously tried to enjoy the football but didn’t have the same impact playing in the crowd, totally different. It is a good league and there are good players, a way to get into Europe. If I hadn’t have made it elsewhere then maybe I’d have enjoyed it more but I couldn’t get that same feeling.

You returned to the swans with the Swans academy 2013-19 (according to Wikipedia). I am assuming it’s a million miles from the club you left in 2003? I was working before then, about 2007 or 2008, I was coaching then. I was in Port Talbot with Tony Pennock as assistant, I was in the Welsh league but coaching the under 14s in the Academy. I had the chance to go full time in 2017 but they made me redundant in 2019 because they decided I wasn’t experienced enough. Over 550 league matches but I didn’t have a degree and so wasn’t experienced enough. With that I went to Forest Green Rovers for a year. It was a great club and had great facilities but I couldn’t afford to do all the travelling and so I ended up back at Afan Lido. They have a good setup and they are hoping to do something. I’m looking forward to it. What is the biggest change you see in young players today than when you were starting out? Fitness, 100%. Especially those at the top level. They are all finely tuned athletes. We would go for a few beers, etc… the lifestyle, the way that they look after their bodies now, the Science involved, it is completely different to my day. I am going to ask you about a few of the academy players that you helped coach but before I wonder whether Tatey and Leon stood out when you first saw them? They were both excellent players. You could tell Tatey played for United, he wanted the ball at the back and would come out confidently. It was hard for Leon with his size and he got stuck on the wing but he was never a winger that could go passed players. You could tell they were talented at such a young age. Both really good guys too, I still message Tatey, did the other day to congratulate him on Forests promotion. Leon lives up the road from me and so I see him about. Both great guys. With your time in the academy, I wonder whether you’ve worked with some of the players which have gone on to play top level? Did you work with Joe Rodon for example?

I didn’t really work with Joe, he was an older age group. I talked with him, and he is a down to earth, quiet and nice guy but I didn’t really get too involved. Joe Allen was also older than who I was working with but I remember speaking with Dan James. I used to play on the right wing and I got predictable so my advice was simply ‘don’t become predictable’. I didn’t have active involvement, but I hope that he maybe took that on board. I coached Ben Cabango a couple of times, Connor Roberts was an apprentice when I was there. Looking forward, Cameron Congreve I’ve had a lot of dealings with and I have giving him stick for taking too many touches. I remember a chance that he had for the Swans last season, I can’t remember who against. But he had the ball and he didn’t overdo it and got a shot away and nearly scored which made me pleased. I spoke to his dad before the game and said ‘limited touches’. Joel Cotterill, is one to watch. He’s great technically and a very gifted player. He’s going to do well. A huge thanks to Paul for his time chatting with me. He seems a great bloke in the brief time I spoke with him and given a real insight into the changes the club and football has seen over he last twenty years.

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Sioned Williams AS/MS My recent work in the Senedd Fy ngwaith diweddar yn y Senedd Many of you have been getting in touch with Mae llawer ohonoch wedi bod yn cysylltu me regarding difficulties in accessing NHS â mi ynghylch anawsterau wrth geisio cael dentistry. I raised the issue in the Senedd mynediad at ddeintyddiaeth y GIG. Codais in a question to the Health Minister, Eluned y mater yn y Senedd mewn cwestiwn Morgan. Please get in touch if you are i’r Gweinidog Iechyd, Eluned Morgan. having problems. Cysylltwch os ydych yn cael problemau. I was elected Chair of the Senedd Cross Party Cefais fy ethol yn Gadeirydd Grwp Group on Learning Disability and would like Trawsbleidiol y Senedd ar Anabledd Dysgu to hear from you if you have concerns about a hoffwn glywed gennych os oes gennych accessing or provision of services for those bryderon ynghylch cael mynediad at with Learning Disabilities . wasanaethau ar gyfer pobl ag anableddau An important part of my role as your regional dysgu. member of the Senedd is supporting groups Rhan bwysig o’m rôl fel eich aelod o’r and organisations that are working hard to Senedd yw cefnogi grwpiau a sefydliadau make a difference in their communities. If sy’n gweithio’n galed i wneud gwahaniaeth you’d like me to come and see the good yn eu cymunedau. Os hoffech i mi ddod i work you are doing or need any help, please weld y gwaith da yr ydych yn ei wneud neu get in touch! angen unrhyw gymorth, cysylltwch â mi! www.sionedwilliams.wales Sioned.Williams@Senedd.cymru 01639 203204 Talwyd costau’r dudalen hon gan Gomisiwn y Senedd, o gronfeydd cyhoeddus The costs of this page have been met by the Senedd Commission from public funds

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Player Watch Harry Darling Harry Darling looks an exciting signing and a player that can slot straight into our style of play. We take a closer look at his stats from last season. A lot has been made about the number and percentage of passes completed which he made at MK Dons. At first glance, they fair only slightly better than Ben Cabango, a player who grew under Martyn as the season went on. The first key stat which I see from that sense is the number of long passes per game. Darling attempts more than twice as many long passes as our Welsh international, you would be right to question whether this would continue under our gaffa! However, I can answer that for you too. The 20/21 campaign, with Russel Martyn as manager, Harry Darling attempted more long passes (6 per game) and it would be fair to assume that we may see more direct balls from the back. Not aimless balls but more ambitious than what we have been used to. The general rule is not rocket science, the more ambitious passes you make, the less are successful and so for Harry to have such a high success rate whilst making a number of longer passes per game speaks for itself. From a defending point of view, the other stat which jumps out is that attackers only get passed him (dribbled) once every ten games. To put that into perspective (obviously different quality of opposition), this is matched by Virgil Van Dyke. However, his Liverpool partners Konate and Gomis are both once every 3 games alongside Thiago Silva. While Rudiger and Harry Maguire are closer to once every two games. This is a VERY impressive stat. Aerially, we know that he is good, and the stats say the same. We must assume that the 0.9 shots per game are generally from his head but that is another stand out statistic alongside his 7 goals. From these stats, defensively sound, easy in possession with the ambition and ability to pick a more ambitious ball, a goal threat from set pieces, what is not to like?

Apps Mins Goals Assists Shots per game Key Passes p/g Dribbles p/g Fouled p/g Disposessed p/g Bad control p/g Avg Passes Pass Percentage% Long Balls p/g Tackles p/g Intercep�ons p/g Fouls p/g Oﬀsides won p/g Clearances p/g Dribbled past p/g Blocks p/g Aerials Won

Darling Cabango 40(1) 34(3) 3569 3073 7 1 1 1 0.9 0.5 0.2 0.5 0.2 0.2 1.5 1 0.3 0.4 0.5 0.8 66.8 65.7 86.7 85.7 5.5 2.2 0.5 1.4 0.8 1.3 0.9 0.9 0.8 0.5 3.4 3 0.1 0.6 0.4 0.4 2.5 2.2

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Across 1)The youngest player to ever be crowned Swans player of the season. 2) Tommy, scored 52 goals in the 1930s. Shares a surname with Swedish Martin but different spelling. 3) Liverpool, Swansea, Newcastle. 4)You won’t remember Ken from 1927 but Norwich have had father and son goalkeepers with the same name. 5) The latest Swans film to come out. About one of our greatest ever managers. 6) Currently assistant manager at ‘Boro, this former Swans and Wales defender has managed Torquay Rotherham, Bury and Scunthorpe. 7) First name of full back whose injury allowed Ben to make his Premier League debut. 8) Allegedly did bad things with a banana (although strongly denied). 9) First name of our Narberth boy. 10) Next year, it will be 100 years since this ‘Sandy’ made his debut.

11)The savior of Swansea City. Had a bar named after him in the North Bank. 12) Defender signed in 2008 and played over 300 matches for club 13) First name of Mr Rajković Down: 1) Brother of John, the gentle giant. 6) Mate of Levien. Probably a twat but never met him. 9) Trinidad, Tobago and Scotland. 14)Wembley goal scorer other than Scotty 15) Wolf 16) Country of birth of Giovanni Savarese 17) Club we signed Darren Way from 18) 520 appearances from 2002-18 (forget Sheffield) 19) 194 games and 91 goals. He reckons he’s Irish but sounds Scouser to me 20) Long throw. Swansea and Cardiff. 21) Jordan or his brother? 22)An ex-Swans player (loan) out in Italy at this club

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1) What is the 4-digit number in which the first digit is one-fifth of the last, and the second and third digits are the last digit multiplied by 3? (Hint: The sum of all digits is 12.) 2) Jane went to visit Jill. Jill is Jane’s only husband’s mother-in-law’s only husband’s only daughter’s only daughter. What relation is Jill to Jane? 3) Tabitha likes cookies but not cake. She likes mutton but not lamb, and she likes okra but not squash. Following the same rule, will she like cherries or pears? 4) In a footrace, Jerry was neither first nor last. Janet beat Jerry. Jerry beat Pat. Charlie was neither first nor last. Charlie beat Rachel. Pat beat Charlie. Who came in last? 5) What is the number that is one more than one-tenth of one-fifth of one-half of 4,000? 6) Find the number that best completes the following sequence: 1 2 4 7 11 ? 22 7) Marian bought 4 oranges and 3 lemons for 90 cents. The next day, she bought 3 oranges and 4 lemons for 85 cents. How much did each lemon and orange cost? 8) There is at least one 9-letter word that contains only 1 vowel. Do you know what it is? 9) Using all the letters each time, can you make at least 3 words from the letters REIAMN? 10) Legend has it that Einstein wrote this riddle when he was still a young man: There are five houses sitting next to each other on a neighbourhood street. Each house's owner is of a different nationality. Each house has different coloured walls. Each house's owner drinks their own specific beverage, smokes their own brand of cigar, and keeps a certain type of pet. None of the houses share any of these variables—nationality, wall colour, beverage, cigar, and pet—they are all unique. Here is what you know: 10) 1. The Englishman lives in the house with red walls. 2. The Swede keeps dogs. 3. The Dane drinks tea. 4. The house with green walls is just to the left of the house with white walls. 5. The owner of the house with green walls drinks coffee. 6. The man who smokes Pall Mall keeps birds. 7. The owner of the house with yellow walls smokes Dunhills. 8. The man in the centre house drinks milk. 9. The Norwegian lives in the first house. 10. The Blend smoker has a neighbour who keeps cats. 11. The man who smokes Blue Masters drinks beer. 12. The man who keeps horses lives next to the Dunhill smoker. 13. The German smokes Prince. 14. The Norwegian lives next to the house with blue walls. 15. The Blend smoker has a neighbour who drinks water. The question is this: One of the house owners keeps fish, who is it?

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Just saw a bloke in Tesco buying 10 six-packs of San Miguel, 20 paella ready meals, 10 boxes of tacos and 3 sombreros. I thought here we go again … Hispanic buying … Went to see a psychic and he was in a bad mood, then I saw a clairvoyant who was rather grumpy... I’m just trying to find a happy medium? Today's annual Fibonacci conference will be as big as the last two combined! I was working late at the Carphone Warehouse last night when I received this text from my wife: 'Honey,thespacebuttonisfaultyonthisphone. Whenyougethomepleasegivemeanalternative. As I was running out the door I was thinking, What the hell does 'ternative' mean?? I recently spent £6,500 on a young registered Black Angus bull. I put him out with the herd, but he just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. I was beginning to think I had paid more for that bull than he was worth. Anyhow, I had the Vet come and have a look at him. He said the bull was very healthy, but possibly just a little young, so he gave me some pills to feed him once per day. The bull started to service the cows within two days, all my cows! He even broke through the fence and bred with all of my neighbour's cows! He's like a machine! I don't know what was in the pills the Vet gave him but they kind of taste like peppermint. Don't you just hate it when people try to act intelligently and talk about Mozart I suspect they have never even seen any of his paintings... June is Eczema Awareness Month. I'm selling scratch cards if anyone wishes to help.

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Does anyone know if the Arachnophobia Helpline has a website? Scotland v Ukraine 2022, Only days to go now until a massive World Cup qualifier. Most of Europe will be rooting for a country that has suffered grotesque abuse, destruction and despair at the hands of an immoral, corrupt and treacherous dictator, and praying for a win on the football field to bring a much needed lift to its desperate population. On the other hand, some people will be supporting Ukraine. Just been to the gym for the first time in years. I was sweating profusely, the trainer came over and said "You're terribly unfit". I said, "To be fair, it is a long application form" Apparently towels are the biggest cause of dry skin Just met a dog that only responds to commands in Spanish. He's Espanyol The boss of a small company has two employees; Jack and Jill. Just recently the company has been doing badly so the boss decides one of them must go. Arriving at his office on Monday, the first person he sees is Jill so he asks her to step into his office and explains his dilemma. "Look Jill, I'm afraid I'm going to have to lay you or Jack off." Jill replies, "You'll have to jack off then, 'cause I've got a headache. My Grandad was really into astrology, and his star sign was cancer so it was ironic how he died really... He was attacked by a giant crab! You know you're drunk when you put your food in the microwave and enter your pin number Why do Cardiff girls wear knickers? To keep their ankles warm At the barbers yesterday, I asked to have my hair cut like Tom Cruise, so he gave me a cushion to sit on I was watching a performance by the Bermuda orchestra a few days ago and was surprised to see the guy playing the triangle suddenly disappear. My wife complained at me eating too many hazelnut chocolate bars so I swiftly moved onto another topic

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SH!T YOU SHOULD KNOW: ECONOMICS I don’t really know what to call this. It began as an article about quantitative easing but its become a full on rant about this completely screwed up country and how pathetic we all are. Ermmm enjoy!

£125,000. That is the magic number for where we are heading. Do you have £125,000 in assets? That is you, personally. If you are in a long-term relationship, do you have £250,000 between you? Take away any debt, your mortgage etc… That is the medium figure for wealth in the UK. It is actually a few years old now so that figure is likely a bit higher with the rocketing housing market and inflation. I don’t, and I know that most people around here don’t have that amount. You may be fortunate enough to be there or thereabout or even considerably past it (well done you!). But that figure was bang on (or thereabouts) to the average Joe in the UK. People who have more than that have above average, people below it, have less.

decade the rich got richer’. I recommend. Since November 2009, the Bank of England have used ‘quantitative easing’ to ‘support’ the economy. Firstly, during and after the global financial crash and then during the pandemic and a couple of times in between for good measure. Quantitative easing is essentially creating new money which is distributed into the economy to keep interest rates low and to encourage confidence. In total, £895 billion has been used for quantitative easing by the UK government since 2009. To put that into perspective, there is only £80 billion of physical money in the UK. If we were to take inflation into account, about 10% of the entire money in the UK has been created via quantitative easing over the last decade or so.

Do you want to hear a crazy stat?

That is the equivalent to just under £25,000 for every adult of working age in the UK.

The 50% of people above this figure own a combined 94.2% of the wealth in this country. The 50% of people below it, own a combined 5.8% and this 5.8% figure gets smaller and smaller every year.

This is not tax. This isn’t given to our government. This is nothing to do with our national debt, furlough, or anything like that at all. This is new money which has been created and released into the economy.

The craziest thing about the stat is that it probably doesn’t surprise you.

The aim of quantitative easing was (and no doubt will be again in the future) to ‘get the economy going again’. And as George Osbourne stated back in 2009 “it will be a help for British families”.

The stats, naturally get worst. If you add the next 10% to the mix, then the bottom 40% of people have just 2.8% of the wealth. The bottom 30% just 1.2%. The bottom 20% 0.4% and the bottom 10% 0.02%. Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poor poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions! How did we get here? Quantitative easing. *There is a brilliant documentary on BBC about this, ‘the

So, the bank of England prints more money (they don’t really, they just do it electronically, it’s a figure of speech), but then what do they do with it? Who do they give it to? You probably noticed that you weren’t given £25,000. If you did, then let’s face it, you probably would have spent it. You’d have built a small extension or even put a deposit down on your first house. Or maybe you’d have bought a car,

a campervan, a new kitchen, carpets, started a new business or even a canal boat. Some (me) would argue that this would have got the economy moving. Got people spending, keeping jobs etc. That’s not what happened. What happened was that it was given to …… the banks. The very fuckwits that caused the financial crash in the first place. The banks then dripped it into the economy and the result were that everybody became richer! It turns out that they did know best!! HOORAY- GENIUS…. Well, kind of. What happened was that the extra money in the system meant that the value of assets increased. So, my house and your house increased in value. We became richer! And the more that you had the richer you became. A house valued at £100,000 in 2011 was valued at £148,000 ten years later. We are £48,000 richer! We can then take out a loan against the new value of our house and buy an extension, new kitchen, campervan, car etc…. everyone is a winner! Especially those with twenty houses priced at £1 million each that are now worth nearly £10 million more. The increase in property value was great if you had one (preferably 10!) but if you didn’t then… you had a 50% increase of nothing which for those of you who struggle with maths…. is still nothing. The rich got very rich. The majority did OK (for a while) and the poor got further and further left behind.

Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poo Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions!

Now we are in 2022. Inflation is rocketing, wa stagnant, equity has been released for many as lo mortgages have increased to the value of the p First time buyers face mammoth mortgage bills fro go. Interest rates are soon to rise and rise and ris The £500 a month mortgage will become £600 an The £80 weekly shop has topped £100 before any is added to the trolly. Heating, electric, petr everything else will keep going up.

Those really struggling will no longer be the bottom twenty percent. Those of us who have been ‘alright next to feel the real pinch.

Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich rich poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions!

The youngest billionaire in the UK is Hugh Grosvenor (pictured above). With around £10bn of wealth. At 28, he’s yet to work a day in his life. Thats fine though. Fucking strikes!! a campervan, a new kitchen, carpets, started a new business or even a canal boat. Some (me) would argue that this would have got the economy moving. Got people spending, keeping jobs etc. That’s not what happened. What happened was that it was given to …… the banks. The very fuckwits that caused the financial crash in the first place. The banks then dripped it into the economy and the result were that everybody became richer! It turns out that they did know best!! HOORAY- GENIUS…. Well, kind of. What happened was that the extra money in the system meant that the value of assets increased. So, my house and your house increased in value. We became richer! And the more that you had the richer you became. A house valued at £100,000 in 2011 was valued at £148,000 ten years later. We are £48,000 richer! We can then take out a loan against the new value of our house and buy an extension, new kitchen, campervan, car etc…. everyone is a winner! Especially those with twenty houses priced at £1 million each that are now worth nearly £10 million more. The increase in property value was great if you had one (preferably 10!) but if you didn’t then… you had a 50% increase of nothing which for those of you who struggle with maths…. is still nothing. The rich got very rich. The majority did OK (for a while) and the poor got further and further left behind.

Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poor poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions! Now we are in 2022. Inflation is rocketing, wages are stagnant, equity has been released for many as loans and mortgages have increased to the value of the property. First time buyers face mammoth mortgage bills from word go. Interest rates are soon to rise and rise and rise again. The £500 a month mortgage will become £600 and £700. The £80 weekly shop has topped £100 before any alcohol is added to the trolly. Heating, electric, petrol and everything else will keep going up. Those really struggling will no longer be the bottom ten or twenty percent. Those of us who have been ‘alright’ are the next to feel the real pinch. Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poor poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions!

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Earlier in the year the Joseph Rowntree Foundation stated that “More than one in five of the UK population (22%) are in poverty– 14.5 million people. Of these, 8.1 million are working-age adults, 4.3 million are children and 2.1 million are pensioners. The lowest 10% have top end assets valued at £15,400 before that number declines to literally nothing. On the other side, 5% of people in the UK are millionaires. One in 20 people. There’s a stat! In fairness, in 2022 and with property price in London etc.. a million isn’t that outrageous anymore. It isn’t sickening that there are millionaires. But billionaires? Billionaires are a totally different kettle of fish and there are 177 known billionaires in the UK. Billionaires are obscene, we know that it’s a lot of money but this is a wonderful way of showing the difference between a million and a billion without just adding three 0s:15,400 seconds (top end of 10% wealth) is 4 hours and 16 minutes 125,000 seconds (average wealth) is 1.5 days A million seconds is 12 days A billion seconds is 31 years With that in mind, the 250 richest people in the UK (which includes our lovely chancellor Rishi Sunak) have a combined wealth of £710.723bn. Up from £658 billion the previous year. That’s over 50 billion increase in twelve months. Or a £200 million increase EACH over a year. Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poor poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions! Train strikes That brings me onto the strikes. We are fucked. We have let stuff go for so long that what we accept has reached insane levels. Over the last few years, with covid, the government have invested billions into the railways to keep things going. I say the government but its our money, its what we will pay in tax for many years to come. But then these railway companies make millions and millions of pounds of profit and pay out to billionaire dividend holders. There is no way of looking at this other than the obvious; we are paying taxes to ensure that big businesses make huge profits. You are being taxed so that your money can go to the railway companies, which they give out as profit to shareholders in their hundreds of millions of pounds. Are you seriously OK with that?? And while they are doing this, they are claiming that they cannot afford to pay their staff a wage increases in line with inflation.

Tick, tick, equality is getting worst, the rich richer, poor poorer. Strikes. Fucking strikes. Fucking Unions! Lack of guns! My grandfather passed away earlier in the year. He had a great life and batted well into the 90s. He would say that the only time workers were listened to was directly after WWII. This was when the creation of the NHS, The Welfare state, council houses etc. were all introduced. In his eyes, there was one simple reason why all that happened; there were shitloads of working-class men returning to the UK with guns. The war had ended and the elite were bricking themselves. We haven’t got guns now and the elite are certainly not bricking themselves but when do we say enough is enough? One billionaire is one too many. We have surpassed numbers which are comprehendible. Back the strikes, back the Nurses, the Teachers, the BT staff, the Railways, UNISON etc.. and if that fails VIVA LA REVOLUTION!! Lets rip these billionaires down!!!!!

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THE VEGAN REVIEW FINDING RUSSELL THE BEST PLACES TO EAT IN AND AROUND SWANSEA.

Falafel Stall, Swansea Market I love Swansea Market. It should be cherished. The characters there, the variety of the stalls and I find that everything is generally a better price and quality than the supermarkets. If you haven’t been for a while, then you should! You won’t be disappointed. I always aim to time my visit there around lunchtime. You have a good choice there, the Thai Taste is always incredible but for this month, when we are talking vegan food for Russell, I had to tell him about the Falafel Stall. First of all, like all good food places, there is often a small queue. Not too long but long enough for you to know that people are willing to wait a few minutes. Secondly, its run by a Swans season ticket holder; always a bonus! £4.50 gets you a falafel wrap (but be sure that you’ve had your Weetabix for breakfast because this thing is heavy!) Take your pick with the filling, I think everything is vegan (but if not, most of it is and just check if you are). It has a large range of sauces to compliment and lovely tasting falafels. All wrapped up together in a wrap although salad boxes available too. Russel, you will love it. If you are vegetarian or even a staunch meat eater, I hugely recommend this place. Get down there and support the market, loads of options for vegies and vegans but for everyone too. Pick up some fish, meat, veg, bread, cockles, laverbread or just a scout around. It has it all!

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THE PUB DEBATE

Should we abolish the monarchy?

NO! by Matthew

There wouldn’t be many people supporting the Monarchy had they of continued in the way that they did a few hundred years ago. Back then the King or Queen of the time had absolute rule, taxation would go directly to them, and they would do with it whatever they saw fit. Wars would begin and end depending on how the Monarchy felt on a particular day and about individual people. This isn’t what we have today. We have nothing like that. What we have had for many years now is merely a figurehead and some ‘celebrities’ which put Britain on the map. There is an interest in the UK because of the Royal Family. You may not like that fact, but it is true. People travel to London to ‘visit the Queen’, heads of state look visibly excited at the prospect of a Queens banquet, as do people up and down the country when they are rewarded for their contribution to charity etc… There isn’t a compelling argument to lose any of this. The cost which the Royal Family has to the country is repaid many, many times over by tourists. The Royal Family allow Britain to punch above its weight. It is also a part of our identity, of our culture. Other countries have their history, how they became what they are today. Our Royal Family are an active part of that which still exists. Royal weddings and births gain global attention, and I expect that this will increase not decrease as the years go by. Whether the Minions movie, the Simpsons or Family Guy, the Royal Family draws attention. We’d be insane to even consider doing away with it. There would be no benefit and a lot of negatives.

In 1999, Australia voted to keep our Royal Family as their Monarchy. Queen Elizabeth II is still head of state of Canada, New Zealand, Antigua and Barbuda, The Bahamas, Belize, Grenada, Jamaica, Papua New Guinea, Saint Lucia, Solomon Islands, St Kitts and Nevis, and St Vincent and the Grenadines. We have a tendency in this country to put ourselves down. Instead of celebrating things which we have, that we have achieved, we look to find some negatives. Of course, there will always be a down side to things but when you weigh it all up, the Royal Family, the palaces and the estates are a symbol of what Great Britain has achieved. They are symbols of Britain ruling the waves. The fact that she is still head of state of all those countries is a lasting symbol of our empire. When the Queen passes, there will be a shift. Charles will be different, but this is what has always happened in this country. William and Kate will modernise and the way that they have been introduced and present themselves shows that the future of the Monarchy and this country is in safe hands. We should be proud of our monarchy and our history. Yougov run a regular poll of the most famous and most liked people in the UK. Currently, of the 20 ‘most liked’ celebrities, 9 are members of the Royal Family. The Queen being well out in front.

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YES! BY Peter When you add together security, police, loss of taxation and the upkeep of the royal family, it is estimated that they cost the taxpayer more than £345 million a year. And this figure continues to rise. Worst than that though is the grotesque symbol of the Monarchy. It sickens me. It is the symbol of a class system, of a pecking order where none of us are equal. Last month, we spent £1 billion on a party to celebrate that inequality. To celebrate that there is a bloodline which will always have the very, very best that the World can offer. We do this while we know families with a different bloodline are visiting foodbanks after generations of deprivation. How can we celebrate that? Do I like the Queen? Yes. I like Charles too and his sons seem OK. Especially Harry. This isn’t personal it is about a very simple question:Do we want to be a country which strives to be as equal as possible or do we want to celebrate mass inequality? Do we want children to see social mobility as attainable? That the kid on an inner-city council estate can get out or do we want a thrown that symbolises the difference between power and wealth with the rest of us? The idea that if someone is born rich then they and their

children and their children’s children will always be rich isn’t somthing which I’m happy with. The argument of what the Queen ‘brings to the table’ is always said with a one-sided view. Yes, people visit the UK to see the Queen. Yet, they don’t see the Queen, they look outside of Buckingham Palace, at the guards. Imagine what you could charge to enter those gates! If there was no royalty, then we could open all the palaces up to tourists. You could even pay to stay there! We’d make far more money from tourists and not less. When it comes to the ‘global stage’, do people honestly think that other countries look at us with a Monarchy as a good thing? (and that’s not even mentioning Prince Andrew) We are ridiculed across much of the world for having a Monarchy. Its kind of sweet and cute in a piss about way but the reality is that people are amazed that we continue with it. France went around chopping heads off, we are 250 years on from that and we still have guards dressed up in silly hats and a Queen that has spent much of her life mastering the wave. There is no real benefit of the monarchy. It is an expense which the country could do without, a symbolisation of an out of date feudal system and it is long overdue that we do away with it… I would however let them keep their heads! .

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L S E N T R U G U N N D I L L E J O E A R S E O A N T E

Mind Puzzles 1) 1155 2) Jane’s daughter 3) Cherries (Tabitha likes food with only two syllables) 4) Rachel 5) 41 6) 16 (each number adds 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6, respectively, to the preceding number). 7) Oranges cost 15 cents each; lemons cost 10 cents each 8) Strengths. (got another? Let us know) 9) AIRMEN, MARINE, and REMAIN 10) The German. He lives in house 4, which has green walls, and he smokes Prince cigars and drinks coffee.

Name the pub 1) Gatehouse 2) Coopers Arms 3) Brunswick 4) The Comercial Gowerton Name the Vagina Catherine the Great Whose Cock is that? King Phillip II Spain

Swansea till I die……. And after!

Complete Football Theme Funeral From £3239 Including: Hearse, Limo, Coffin and Cremation fees. Call Alan or Tom for a no obligation consultation or just for a chat about options.

01792 771232

www.john-edwards-funerals.co.uk/sports-themed-funerals/

Pizza & Tapas to Dine in or Takeaway Traditional Wood fired pizzas

and home cooked mediterranean tapas. Open - Wed 6 - 9, Thur 6 - 9, Fri 6 - 9, Sat 12 - 9

CALL 01792 842180 TO MAKE A RESERVATION 1 HIGH STREET CLYDACH, SA6 5LG