Khuluma49

take me home please

February

2016

PICASSO HEADLINE

Forever Starring Thenjiwe Moseley FOR THE MENU see pages 2 & 3

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ccording to Javier Pascual Salcedo, bureaucracy is the art of making the possible impossible. This is why, in the 1800s, so many flea-infested peasants spent months crossing the Atlantic to get to the Wild West, where they could actually do something more than be the minions of a feudal bureaucracy. But, before

long, the West lost its Wild, and became overrun with government officials and tax collectors, and so those with a personality fled to Canada, where they became mosquito infested, but free. Today in Canada you cannot prune a tree in your own back yard without permission from your municipality, so the last outpost is Alaska, where you can shoot and chop things, and it's too cold for any government official to go and tell you what not to do.

And then you have South Africa, where we actually employed Australians to write much of our legislation.

Most of it is irrelevant and unenforceable, and so we generally ignore it and get on with living life rather than having some third party decide what we cannot do. You might still have the misfortune of having to deal with a government department from time to time, but unlike Switzerland, you're allowed to tile your own bathroom, and unlike Norway, you can buy beer at your supermarket any time you want.

In Australia, you cannot build a tree house for your kids without development approval from your local council’s Development Assessment Panel; whereas back in sunny SA, once you have planning approval (or not), you can build your own home by yourself! And unlike many cities in Germany, you can still make a braai with wood without having to first obtain council permission to burn fossil fuels. At the beach in Los Angeles County, you may not throw a Frisbee without permission from the lifeguard.

But getting back to what first chased the free souls to the New World: the British must be running out of things to legislate, because according to the brilliantly named ‘Outer Space Act of 1986’, the Secretary of State is permitted to use ‘reasonable force’ to prevent an alien invasion of the UK – as long as the aliens don’t possess a licence to invade, in which case, they can operate their ‘space objects’ in perfect legality.

Eish… I would rather tolerate spending an afternoon at our Department of Home Affairs.

Erik Venter, CEO: Comair Ltd

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Contents

FEBRUARY 2016

10 Regulars

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WESTERN CAPE What to do, what to wear, what to eat and where to sleep in and around the Mother City this month

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BEAUTY Love the skin you’re in even more with these hot beauty products

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GAUTENG Get busy, chow down, shop till you drop, then sleep it off in Gauteng

WATCH February’s latest silver-screen releases

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KWAZULU-NATAL Play, eat, dress and dos like a real KZNite

READ Beat the heat with a hot new book

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Guide

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COMPETITIONS Win stuff! Lots of stuff!

GARDEN ROUTE Food, fashion and fabulous getaways along our glorious Garden Route

LISTEN The latest CD releases and up-and-coming artists, plus we chat to Fedde le Grand

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GAMES Digital delights to pass the time

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THE NOTICEBOARD Our monthly roundup of what’s going on around the country

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TECH Gadgets and gizmos we reckon will be around for a long time

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VIEW FROM THE TOP Our CEO reckons we should be grateful for SA’s bureaucracy (really)

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ÜBER-EDITOR’S LETTER Thenjiwe Moseley on overshare

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KULULA PAGES Up the romance factor with kulula.com’s awesome deals

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TOP TIPPLE When and how to buy wine for investment purposes

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Chat 78

RAPPER Cassper Nyovest the friendly rapper

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PERFORMER The Road less travelled with Nandi Mngoma

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LOCAL HERO Organisations and people working to make sure criminal offenders don’t offend again

Travel 94

GAME CHANGER Travel experiences that might change your life forever

Action

102 BEHIND THE SCENES Your favourite franchises and how they came into being 109 DRIVE The Mercedes-Benz G-Class, plus five other invincible cars

Stuff

113 PROPERTY What makes timeless design, well, timeless?

117 MONEY MATTERS The five habits of financially savvy people 118 BUSINESS Learn to love what you do 120 HEALTH Preserve your long-term health with these handy hints 122 COLUMN Marlene Wasserman ponders the meaning of happily ever after

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EDITORIAL Editor Anthony Sharpe – anthonys@picasso.co.za Content Manager Raina Julies Copy Editor Lynn Berggren-Goodwin Content Co-ordinator Vanessa Payne Editorial Interns Diana Fletcher, Amy Stimson ART Head of Design Studio Jayne Macé-Ferguson Designers Anja Hagenbuch, Mfundo Archie Ndzo Production Editor Shamiela Brenner Cover Photograph Morné van Zyl Make-up Artist Michelle Dickman SALES Business Manager Lodewyk van der Walt – lodewykv@picasso.co.za Project Manager Richard White khlassifieds Project Manager Steve Norval Sales Consultants Stephen Crawford, Jay Deary, Bonnie Eksteen, Randall Grace, Eugene Howard, Merryl Klein, Louis le Roux, Marc Plastow, Andre Potgieter, Roman Ross, Clint Smith, Zelda Stein Advertising Co-ordinator Vanessa Payne OPERATIONS Senior Bookkeeper Deidre Musha General Manager: Magazines Jocelyne Bayer KULULA.COM CEO Comair Limited Erik Venter Head of Department: Marketing, kulula.com Shaun Pozyn Marketing Manager, kulula.com Bridgette Ramuluvhana Brand Manager, kulula.com Thembeka Mabaso COMAIR LIMITED 1 Marignane Drive, Bonaero Park, Kempton Park, 1619 Tel: 011 921 0111 | kulula.com contact centre: 0861 KULULA (585852)

To advertise in this magazine, please contact Richard White (Project Manager) at 021 469 2542, or email richardw@picasso.co.za To advertise in the khlassifieds section, please contact Steve Norval (Project Manager) at 021 469 2435, or email steven@picasso.co.za Copyright: No portion of this magazine may be reproduced in any form without written consent of the publishers. The publishers are not responsible for unsolicited material. khuluma is published monthly by Picasso Headline Reg: 59/01754/07. The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of Picasso Headline, kulula or Times Media. All advertisements/advertorials and promotions have been paid for and therefore do not carry any endorsement by the publishers. While every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of its contents, neither kulula, nor the publisher can be held responsible for any omissions or errors, or for any misfortune, injury or damages that may arise therefrom. We reserve the right to edit interviews for layout purposes.

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ÜBER-EDITOR OF THE MONTH

Thenjiwe Moseley

#overshare

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picture: morné van zyl

P

eople always ask me where I get material for my comedy from, as if creating jokes requires some scientific intelligence. The honest truth is that as much as laughter is the best medicine, we can hardly compare the best joke in the world to a cure for Ebola.

Being a comedian requires one to find humour in any situation. One of my most viral comedy skits is where I’m a speaker at my sister’s funeral. They’re hardly humorous occasions, but a lot of funny things happen at funerals (I’m not sure about white people’s funerals, but anyone who has attended a black funeral knows the drama that goes on). So you too can be a comedian if you’re brave enough to grab a mic and joke about your friend’s ugly kids.

These days you don’t even need a stage – you can just update your Facebook status. But the problem with social media is that there are people who forget that it is not a social worker, and that some conversations are best had behind closed doors with your real friends. And some issues are best left for us comedians to address (including my fellow comics in Parliament).

I have friends I haven’t seen in person for years, but I can tell you everything about their lives – from the colour of the curtains in their bedroom to what they had for dinner last night. I can also tell you which houses are empty, just in case you would like to go and break in. Some people are so excited to tell us they’re going to New York for two weeks that they forget they’re also informing us that their homes will be empty.

When I got the opportunity to be part of this issue, I was excited to talk to people whose work I have admired and followed for a while, but I soon realised that I already know too much about some of them, which leaves one with no relevant questions to ask.

THENJIWE’S So although I don’t follow hip-hop music, CREDS I chatted to Cassper Nyovest, whom I’ve Lawyer-turned-comedian always admired for his willingness to do Thenjiwe Moseley is famous for her hilarious YouTube videos, stage what has never been done before. I also productions and all-round good jokes. got a chance to speak to my home girl See her live in Bitches be Back! at Nandi Mngoma, who proves that beauty Carnival City this month, and follow her and brains can exist in the same body. @thenjiwecomedy.

That’s it! Don’t forget to let us know when you’ll be out of town…

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romance 101: love is in the air

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ove is in the air as we take to the skies to celebrate the most romantic day of the year: Valentine’s Day. Now, V-Day often creates more stress than romance as many of us battle to find the perfect gift for our loved one, but we believe that nothing says ‘I love you’ like surprising your partner with a weekend or holiday away.

To make things easier, we’re sharing romantic travel ideas and destinations that would put Casanova to shame. So pop the question, celebrate a special anniversary or just make new memories at one of our fabulous destinations.

out of africa

the love boat Romance and cruising go hand in hand, so set sail on one of our cruise packages.

Captain your own barge as you cruise through the canals of Amsterdam.

wining and dining Transport your love to the French countryside on African soil with a

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weekend in the charming winelands town of Franschhoek. Stroll the main street of this historic town, go wine tasting and eat in one of the award-winning restaurants or bistros the town is famous for. You can tailor your getaway, and book your flight, car and hotel on our website.

island loving A short five-hour flight from Jozi will land you in SA’s most favourite honeymoon destination. The tropical island of Mauritius with its palm-tree beaches, warm water, beautiful sunsets and great seafood is sure to make anyone fall in love all over again.

Simply click the ‘romance’ button on our website and hit a home run on the love front with our help.

romance in the city You don’t have to leave your city to impress your sweetheart. Take date night to the next level and surprise them with a show, dinner and a sleepover in your home town. Choose from a wide range of exquisite accommodation options in all major cities in Mzansi on our website.

Visit www.kulula.com or call our contact centre on 0861 KULULA (585852) to book your romantic getaway today.

picture: supplied

Share an African sunset and dine under the stars on safari at any of the game reserves, tented camps and lodges we have partnered with. Choose a local break at Pilanesberg or the Kruger National Park.

Or up the romance factor and hop on a flight to Victoria Falls to see the ‘Smoke that Thunders’ with your loved one.

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this year, fund your flight in full with Vitality You probably already know that Vitality members save up to 35% on local flights (base ticket fare) when they book with kulula.com. This year, we’re launching an incredible new benefit! With Flight Booster, you can save up to 100% on local flights (base ticket fare and excluding airport taxes).

The extra saving is paid to you as a cash-back.

Keep an eye on Discovery’s website and socialmedia channels for more on this terrific benefit.

Make 2016 the year to get moving and get flying with Vitality and kulula.com.

Choose your favourite Tsogo Sun hotel and let kulula book your room. Now that’s luxury you can afford.

Rent a car with your flight and get a 15% discount, or get the best rates with Europcar.

Protea Hotels will ensure your stay with them is as unique as the kulula experience. Try out any one of their hotels – you won’t forget the experience.

Got some eBucks? Pay or part-pay for your next kulula flight using your eBucks.

twitter.com/kulula facebook.com/iflykulula

THE NOTICEBOARD It’s the month of love, and we’d love you to show us some by following us on Twitter or Facebook. We’ll make sure to reciprocate with awesome deals, useful info and fun content!

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GUIDE | COMPETITIONS

It's a jungle down south

One lucky reader can win two tickets to witness the funkiest of funk from international artist Jungle on 1 April at Kirstenbosch Gardens in Cape Town. Tickets available at webtickets.co.za.

Do you even lift?

One reader can win two tickets to Sowing the Seeds on 2 April at Emmarentia Dam in Jo’burg. With performances by international artists Jungle, and Of Monsters and Men, as well as a wonderful array of local support acts, it’s going to be a day to remember. Check out sowingtheseeds.co.za for info and ticket sales.

We’ve got two Collagen Lift Paris hampers, each valued at R1 400, to give away! Collagen Lift Paris is a new French drinkable collagen that is clinically proven to reduce wrinkles by up to 50%. Collagen Lift Paris is available at selected pharmacies and beauty salons countrywide and online for R680 per box of 28 ampoules. Check out collagenliftparis.com.

Competitions Monstrous!

We’ve got a set of double tickets for one reader to be enchanted by the fabulous international talent Of Monsters and Men on 30 March at Kirstenbosch Gardens in Cape Town.

Tickets available for purchase at webtickets.co.za.

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To enter

Go to khulumaonline.co.za and hit the competitions tab. Competitions are open to all South African residents over the age of 18, excluding employees of Picasso Headline/Times Media Ltd/kulula.com/ Comair Limited, and close on 29 February 2016.

Movie merchandise

We’ve got five sassy How to be Single hampers (American-flag sunglasses, a key ring of hair ties, heart-shaped key chain, transparent sticky notes, laundry backpack, women’s off-the-shoulder T-shirt, and two stemless wine glasses) and five Deadpool hampers (beanie, T-shirt, selfie stick, bottle opener, and X-Men DVDs) to give away! (Ts&Cs apply. Prizes are not transferrable and subject to availability. We reserve the right to substitute any prize with another of equivalent value without giving notice.)

pictures: supplied, dan wilton, Meredith truax

Reap what you sow

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GUIDE | NOTICEBOARD

The noticeboard The who, why, when and where of what’s going on around Mzansi.

RAM KHULUMAG

With the innovative and stylish new collection from Take Charge, your 100%-genuine-leather handbag now comes fitted with the niftiest addition: a charging unit for your phone. This one is for the on-the-go traveller and that one friend who always needs to borrow your charger whenever they visit. take-charge.co.za.

SWEET REWARDS

GETTING THE JITTERS South Africa’s premier improvisation troupe, Jittery Citizens, boasts SA’s comedy best, and hosts a number of exciting worshops.

Catch them on 12 and 25 February at Jo’burg’s Market Theatre. Or audition to join the Citizens if you think you have significant comedy clout. jitterycitizens.com.

The CHOC Childhood Cancer Foundation is hosting an International Childhood Cancer Day for their CHOC-olate Loyalty Programme on 15 February. CHOC provides nationwide physical and psychosocial support, particularly to low-income families and homes far from accessible treatment.

As if you needed added incentive, CHOC is offering fantastic monthly rewards for the minimal monthly membership of just under R60 – all with the knowledge that your money is going to children in very great need. Visit choc.org.za or choc-olate.co.za.

CARDBORDEAUX Lazy summer days just got even lazier. The conveniently sized 3-litre Two Oceans Sauvignon Blanc and Cabernet Sauvignon Merlot can now be bought at supermarkets and liquor stores countrywide.

The bag-in-a-box is environmentally friendly, sealing in freshness, and suited for absolutely anything from chilling on the veranda at sunset to camping.

We’ve broken out the fliters and the hashtags, and now we’re taking flight into the mainstream!

Get ready for some scantily clad comedians (not really), some stunning travel snaps, a little Instagramic artistry and some major laughs.

You’ve held us close to your hearts and your eyeballs, now hold us close to your hashtags by following @khulumamagazine.

SLICK PICNIC No need to panic if you haven’t made an effort to organise plans in time for Valentine’s Day. Webersburg Wine Estate has got you covered. And, let’s face it, a trip up the slopes of the Helderberg mountains and the Cape Winelands is a scenic day out!

Book your picnic basket or treat yourself to spending night at a special discounted rate for the weekend in their five-star luxury suites. Call 021 881 3636 or email info@webersburg.co.za for more info.

pictures: supplied

TAKING CHARGE

* Alcohol sale prohibited to persons under 18 years of age.

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GUIDE | WESTERN CAPE

What’s on Western Cape Sports challenge Don’t miss the Camphill School Sports Challenge, taking place in Hermanus this month. Events include MTB rides, trail and river runs, and family walks through the Hemel-en-Aarde Valley.

Camphill School Hermanus is an independent school for children and young adults with special-education needs. To sign up for the challenge, visit enteronline.co.za.

Please note: Every child is unique – and not only capable of learning, but also of succeeding.

SPIRIT OF THE SCREEN 18-21 February

Film festival The Cape Town International Animation Festival will take place at the River Club in Observatory this month, giving locals a chance to watch the world’s craftiest animated films.

For those with more than a passing interest in the genre, a range of workshops and master classes will be on offer. Topics include character animation, scriptwriting and production, a highlight of which is the slot with Laika producer Mark Shapiro. Visit ctiaf.com.

Please note: Scientists need to invent a way to make DNA work like it does in cartoons.

FIT FOR A KING 23 February – 19 March

Comedy show ‘The Fugard Theatre exists to showcase the best of SA talent and it all begins with writers…

Louis Viljoen is one of these new voices whom [we] will nurture by appointing him our first playwright in residence,’ says Eric Abraham, founding producer and owner of the theatre. Catch Louis’ 2014 Fleur Du Cap award-winning play The Kingmakers, a ‘pitch-black’ comedy set in the familiar world of SA politics. Tickets available at Computicket.

Please note: The Kingmakers contains extremely strong language – strictly no under 16s.

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LOVED UP 13-14 February

Valentine’s fun Choose from two Valentine’s events at Anthonij Rupert Wyne in Franschhoek. On 13 Feburary, experience the movie A Good Year, starring Russell Crowe, in a gorgeous outdoor setting that includes mountain views and a sumptuous picnic. The next day, a delicious Valentine’s Day brunch will be served in the estate’s sumptuous Tasting Room. To book, email tasting@rupertwines.com or call 021 874 9041.

Please note: The heart has its reasons, of which reason knows no reason.

EN POINTE 22-28 February

Ballet contest The South African International Ballet Competition (SAIBC) has announced its fifth event, taking place at the Artscape Opera House. Locally trained dancers in classical ballet and contemporary dance, as well as many others from around the world, will compete for gold, silver and bronze medals. Additionally, CEO Dirk Badenhorst and the SAIBC board have amassed prize money totalling R400 000. For more info, visit ctibc.com. Tickets available at Computicket.

Please note: Ballet is like dreaming on your feet.

NOW’S THE TIME TO KICK UP YOUR FEET 26-28 February

Lifestyle expo The Retirement & Lifestyle Expo is taking place at the CTICC this month.

Visitors will be treated to insightful exhibitions and workshops, designed to assist with securing the ideal retirement lifestyle and accommodation. In addition, a trade conference will address issues pertinent to the challenges of those employed in the retirement industry. For more, call 021 914 2888 or email registrar@sbs.co.za.

Please note: R100 entry gets you free parking, a coffee and free access to the retirement workshops.

text: vanessa rogers; pictures: supplied

DISABILITY EQUALS POSSIBILITY 13 February

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GUIDE | WESTERN CAPE

OUDE WERF APPLE TARTE TATIN 250ml cake flour 1 Tbsp granulated white sugar Pinch of salt 125ml cold butter, cubed 1 egg yolk 30ml ice water Apple topping 6 Granny Smith apples 75ml butter 250ml granulated white sugar Seeds of half a vanilla pod Pinch of salt Pastry • Combine the flour, sugar and salt.

• With a pastry blender or two knives, cut up butter until it resembles coarse crumbs, and mix with the flour mixture.

• Whisk the egg yolk with the ice water, and drizzle over the flour mixture.

• Toss the mixture until it clumps and, if necessary, add up to two teaspoons more water.

• With floured hands, quickly press mixture into a 2.5cm-thick disc.

• Wrap the dough in plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 minutes.

Apple topping • Peel, core and quarter apples, then set aside.

• In a 25cm cast-iron skillet, melt butter over medium heat.

• Stir in the sugar and vanilla, and cook, stirring for two minutes.

• Spread the wet sugar mixture evenly over the bottom of the pan and arrange apples on top, overlapping and wedging them tightly to fill the pan. Cook gently until apples are tender and the syrup is thick and golden caramel in colour, about 30 minutes. Remove from the heat and sprinkle with salt.

• Refrigerate pan on a rack for 30 minutes.

• On a lightly floured surface, roll out dough to a 28cm circle. Drape loosely over a rolling pin and unroll over the apple mixture. Cut four steam vents in the centre of the dough.

• Bake at 220oC for 10 minutes, then reduce the heat to 190oC and bake until the crust is golden.

• Invert a heat-proof platter over the tart. Wearing oven gloves, turn the pan upside down onto a platter, carefully lifting away the pan.

• Remove any apples stuck to the pan and arrange over the tart. Spoon any remaining syrup over the top.

• Serve with a good-quality vanilla ice cream or clotted cream.

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OUDE WERF HOTEL

LA PERLA RESTAURANT

SHWE SHWE ICE CREAM

Our planet has supported life and love for a long, long time. The ‘Living Green’ ethos at Oude Werf aims to keep it that way by applying ethical, resourcesaving practices throughout the hotel and restaurant. The eatery has kindly supplied an apple-tart recipe above.

30 Church Street, Stellenbosch, 021 887 4608, oudewerfhotel.co.za.

La Perla is Cape Town’s oldest surviving restaurant. This Cape Town culinary classic opened in Waterkant Street in 1957, and moved to its current spot in Sea Point in 1969. Their delicious crayfish-laden fish soup has been on the menu since day one – so almost forever.

Beach Road, Sea Point, Cape Town, 021 439 9538, laperla.co.za.

Shwe shwe fabric was introduced to South Africa by German immigrants in 1858. This is not forever, but it’s a long time. Stellenbosch’s Shwe Shwe artisanal ice cream is made out of sugar, eggs and cream, not cloth, but it’s just as funky as the fabric. Available at selected Spars nationwide. icecreamcommunity.com.

FEBRUARY 2016

text: anna trapido; pictures: supplied

Eat Western Cape

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GUIDE | WESTERN CAPE R279 Spree R595 Movepretty

R2 600 Prestwich Collection

R1 399 Woolworths R549 Superbalist

R1 299 Spree

R649 Superbalist

R3 499 Superbalist

Fit and funky

R699 Country Road

Brand strategist and fashion designer Annelize Kotze is the co-founder of South African fitness-wear label Movepretty.

R899 Woolworths

ANNELIZE’S FASHION TIP

compiled by: johan labuschagne; pictures: supplied

R749 H&M

R349 H&M

Dress any look up with a pair of good heels, change your hairstyle, and add bright lips to top it off!

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R1 099 Superbalist

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WESTERN CAPE | GUIDE

Diamant is forever

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oday’s the big day. Candyfloss clouds clump together in a deepblue sky, melting away as they occasionally drift before the sun’s gentle rays. A light breeze rustles the leaves on the oak trees lining the mossy-brick paving that runs between the field where the marquee stands with the manor house above. The string trio play lilting, romantic songs that call to mind film adaptations of Jane Austen’s works. Little girls in floral dresses laugh as they chase one another, and the resident Border collie dashes past me, smearing dirt on my white wedding dress, but I don’t care. Wait, why am I wearing a white dress?

While my therapist is gleefully harvesting dreams like these as fodder for her dissertation, I blame them on my stay at Diamant Estate in the Agter-Paarl area.

The 300-year-old farm is establishing itself as a pretty fantastic place to tie the knot, you see. They’ve converted an

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historic wine cellar into their main venue, with space for up to 140 guests, underfloor heating, and a giant fireplace. There’s space for a dance floor too, of course, and a fire pit in one of the outside courtyards.

There’s also an on-site chapel, once a stable, with the original walls still intact, but updated with heated stucco-style flooring, custom-made wooden pews and beautiful chandeliers casting light.

For spring days like those in my dream, the gardens have a glorious view out over the Paarl valley, and can be set up with a Bedouin tent or marquee. All this wedding wondrousness is presided over

by General Manager MT Ferreira, who’s determined to take the estate to even greater heights. Spend five minutes with this man, and you’ll want him to plan your wedding. But don’t worry: if you need to spend a week brainstorming your next big corporate takeover, they offer tailor-made conferencing packages, too.

Of course, you and your guests of honour will want to stay the night, which you can do in either the historic manor house, with its three large rooms with air-con, humongous beds and huge bathrooms with freestanding baths, or the more contemporary pioneer house, which offers slightly more humble lodgings.

While you’re there, it’s worth mentioning that the estate is right next door to the culinary Disneylands that are Fairview and Spice Route, with their plethora of wines, cheeses, beers, coffees, biltong, burgers, goats, goat towers, somebody stop me from drooling please…

Or you can just wander the grounds of the estate as the sun slips slowly beneath the horizon in the west, spilling soft light across the Paarl valley spread before you, as soft string music wafts through your imagination. Just don’t tell your therapist.

Suid-Agter-Paarl Road, Paarl, 076 111 6905, diamantestate.com.

pictures: supplied

Anthony Sharpe ties himself in knots at Diamant Estate.

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-List your property. bermanbrothers.co.za

Buy. Rent. Sell.

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Bianca: 072 224 2777 Rilee: 072 350 8832 E: sales@bermanbrothers.co.za

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GAUTENG | GUIDE

What’s on Gauteng THE WAY OF THE WARRIOR 6-7 February

MUM’S THE WORD 6-7 February

Live music British rock band Mumford and Sons have been rather busy these past few months, headlining a total of 13 music festivals in Europe and the US. Fortunately for us, this month they arrive in South Africa, and Pretoria residents can catch them at the Monument Amphitheatre, where they’ll perform their best hits, including ‘The Cave’, ‘Little Lion Man’ and ‘I Will Wait’.

Tickets available at Computicket.

Please note: We’re not sure if Mumford and Sons has multiple songs … or just one really long song.

LOVE IS IN THE AIR 14 February

Live music For one night only, witness Bollywood superstar Shreya Ghoshal at Emperors Palace, as she wows the audience with her renditions of ‘Chikni Chameli’, ‘Ooh La La Ooh La La’ and ‘Radha on the Dancefloor’.

Shreya holds seven International Indian Film Academy (IIFA) Awards, and won the IIFA Award for a record three consecutive years from 2012 to 2014. Tickets available at Computicket.

Please note: Bollywood stars are versatile: they not only act, but each one also has the dance skills of John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever.

text: vanessa rogers; pictures: supplied

MAKE IT AN ULTRA 26-27 February (Jo’burg) 27-28 February (Cape Town)

Electronic-music festival Don’t miss the third annual Ultra South Africa, a two-day event for electronic-music lovers, when it hits the Nasrec Expo Centre in Jo’burg and the Cape Town Ostrich Ranch. This year, headliners Skrillex and Zedd will be supported by Black Coffee, Dash Berlin, Galantis, The Martinez Brothers, Robin Schultz and Seth Troxler.

Tickets available at ultrasouthafrica.com.

Please note: In the 90s, it was called painful dial-up noise.

Today, it’s called trap.

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Obstacle race If you’re in the market for a fun-filled, action-packed and highly entertaining adventure race, don’t hesitate to enter the Jeep Warrior Race, taking place at Hakahana in Hartbeespoort. ‘Warriors’ must take on and conquer a range of challenging and over-the-top obstacles, while DJs, beer stands, food stalls and a product expo are laid on for those needing entertainment and refreshments. To enter, visit warrior.co.za.

Please note: To a real warrior, power perceived may be power achieved.

TINY GOLDEN BUBBLES 20 February

Bubbly tasting Extending Valentine’s Day vibes are the organisers of Brooklyn Bubbles, scheduled to take place on the top floor of Brooklyn Square at Brooklyn Mall. You can sample 15 of the country’s finest Méthode Cap Classiques for just R200 per person. The ticket includes a tasting glass and book of coupons.

Entertainment includes live music and a range of titbits such as sushi, oysters and imported cheeses. Visit webtickets.co.za.

Please note: If you’re seeking the truth, bubbly is better than a lie detector.

THEY’RE BAAAAACK! 26-27 February

Live comedy Our illustrious cover star, Thenjiwe Moseley, stars alongside Nina Hastie, Celeste Ntuli, Anele Mdoda, Tumi Morake, Noko Moswete and Tracey-Lee Oliver in Bitches Be Back! at the Carnival City Big Top Arena. This magnificent collection of stand-up, sketch and singing will have you standing in your seat, celebrating the feminine spirit, body and mind – all while you laugh your head off, of course. Tickets available at Computicket.

Please note: Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating? To stop the snoring before it starts.

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GUIDE | GAUTENG

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LE SEL @ THE CRADLE

LA MARINA

HEARTWOOD SMOKEHOUSE

Chef Coco Reinarhz’s restaurant, Le Sel at the Cradle, is located in Magaliesburg’s utterly beautiful, epically inspirational Cradle of Humankind. It all feels far away from the everyday, but it’s actually only 45 minutes from Jo’burg.

The restaurant looks out over valleys where our ancestors lived more than 3-million years ago, and chef Coco incorporates this history into the décor of his restaurant, with walls lined with Stone Age hand axes and grinding stones found by archaeologists on the property.

Kromdraai, Lanseria, Krugersdorp, 011 659 1622, thecradle.co.za.

Real balsamic vinegar (known as Aceto Balsamico Tradizionale) is made from a reduction of cooked white Trebbiano grape juice, and has been produced in Modena and Reggio Emilia in Italy since the Middle Ages.

Most South African grocery stores sell an inexpensive imitation called Aceto Balsamico di Modena. La Marina in Modderfontein is a delicious exception to the general rule – they sell the real thing.

7 Platinum Drive, Longmeadow Business Park, Modderfontein, 011 608 3277, lamarinafoods.co.za.

In Medieval England, sons returning home after a period away were expected to bring a present of meat.

This would often consist of spiced pork, coated in a flour-and-water paste, and then cooked in a baker’s oven. And so the traditional Britishstyle pork pie was born.

Heartwood Smokehouse (near Hartbeespoort Dam) produces delicious individual pork pies. Get your pork-pie fix at the Jozi Food Market in Greenside, Jo’burg, or buy directly from the farm.

082 480 6190, jozifoodmarket.co.za.

FEBRUARY 2016

text: anna trapido; pictures: supplied

Eat Gauteng

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GUIDE | GAUTENG

R5 699 Spree

R200 Skinny Sbu Socks

R699 Spree

R2 495 Red Oker

R149 H&M

R550 Old Khaki

R559 Spree

Rockin’ your socks

R129 H&M

R129 H&M

compiled by: johan labuschagne; pictures: supplied

Sibusiso Ngwenya is the head designer and founder of Skinny Sbu Socks, a funky and colourful brand of socks specifically designed for the hip South African male.

R699 Spree

SIBUSISO’S FASHION TIP

These are basics in a man’s wardrobe: white shirt; blue-denim jeans; socks that respresent the kind of person you are – oh, and brown brogues.

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R365 Red Oker R1 095 Marco Benetti

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GUIDE | GAUTENG

One big, happy family

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he spirit of community is the first thing you’ll notice about Dikhololo. Arranged into 14 different ‘camps’ clustered around swimming pools and dotted between rocky ridges, the 274 self-catering units are definitely laid out with group holidays in mind.

Not that you’ll feel claustrophobic if you’re in search of quiet bushveld time; the 450-hectare property has plenty of quiet corners that offer game-sighting opportunities and ample opportunity to find some tranquillity.

The rooms are comfortable with plenty of space, and the kitchens offer the chance to do some proper cooking – even the smaller units come wellequipped. There’s DStv, prepaid air conditioning and a braai facility at each one, and the units are serviced daily.

The resort really comes alive when it’s full of families though, with the main area offering grass play areas,

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jungle gyms and other entertainment, like a pool room, tennis and squash courts, mini golf, table tennis and a heated indoor swimming pool (some of the activities are offered for a small additional fee). There’s even an ATM and a small supermarket, for any of the essentials you may have forgotten.

In peak season there’s a full programme of entertainment for the kids, with shows, games and quizzes, plus live bands for everyone to enjoy.

The community spirit shines through again when everyone gathers around the braai for music and drinks – it’s a holiday you’ll either love to share with a group of friends or come back from having made new friends. Off-peak there are still plenty of things on the schedule to keep everyone entertained, and the Dikhololo team is happy to tailor entertainment options, with a little advance notice.

If your idea of a bushveld break doesn’t include scrambling your own eggs, the

restaurant in the main complex serves breakfasts big enough to fuel a day of thrill-seeking, along with light lunches and revolving themed evenings that could see pizza, fish braai or even lamb on the spit as dining options. Takeaways are an option too, if you’d prefer to have your meal on your own patio.

It’s not all go, go, go – you may as well stay in the city if you constantly want to be on the hop. Game drives with the knowledgeable staff are a treat, and they’ll gladly share anecdotes about the antelope, giraffe and zebra, and abundant bird life that roam the reserve. Short drives mean the kids won’t get bored, and there’s plenty to see anyway.

The resort is geared for conferencing and team building too, with four airconditioned conference rooms with space for up to 350 delegates.

Siena Farm, Brits, North West, 012 277 9000, dikhololo.co.za.

pictures: supplied

Trevor Crighton beats around the bush at Dikhololo Game Reserve, just two hours outside Jo’burg.

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Explore the City

SEE MORE WITH GAUTRAIN From Johannesburg to Pretoria, explore fascinating places, attractions and tourism destinations along Gautrain’s train and bus routes.

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3950 | iww.co.za | ew

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KWAZULU-NATAL | GUIDE

What’s on KZN MILE A MINUTE 13-14 February

ON WHITE WATERS 18-20 February

ORCHESTRAL MANOEUVRES 18, 25 February

UNTIL DRESS DO YOU PART 4-6 March

Swimming race The Midmar Mile takes place at the Midmar Dam near Howick this month. The race’s full length is a mile, or 1.6km (64 lengths in a 25m pool), which may sound easy to an Ironman athlete, but is a fair challenge to a novice. Funds raised go to charities and drowning-prevention initiatives in the region.

Visit midmarmile.co.za.

Please note: You cannot swim for new horizons until you’ve lost sight of the shore.

Concert The KZN Philharmonic Summer Season kicks off with two concerts at Durban’s City Hall. On the 18th, the programme consists of Weber’s Oberon Overture, Brahms’ Double Concerto and Beethoven’s Symphony No. 6. On the 25th, enjoy Rachmaninoff’s The Rock (Op. 7) and Piano Concerto No. 1, as well as Dvorak’s Symphony No. 7. Pensioners pay R185, and full-price tickets are R220. Tickets and booking info available at Computicket.

Please note: Music is a bridge between earth and heaven.

Canoe marathon Track the 120km FNB Dusi Canoe Marathon between Pietermaritzburg and Durban this month as up to 2 000 of the world’s top canoeists take to the water. The three stages involve: 42km from Camps Drift through to Dusi Bridge; a gruelling 46km stretch to Inanda Dam; and a 36km section towards Blue Lagoon. Visit dusi.co.za.

Please note: True merit is like a river – the deeper it is, the less noise it makes.

Bridal expo KZN’s largest bridal expo, the NWJ Bridal Show, has had a makeover. Indulge in the Future Bride Wedding Theatre, bridal hair and make-up sessions, daily fashion shows, a 50% discount from NWJ Fine Jewellery, and niche suppliers who’ll have you donning a handcrafted flower crown in no time. It’s on at the Durban Expo Theatre. Check out nwjbridalshow.co.za.

Please note: ‘In my house I’m the boss. My wife is just the decision maker.’ – Woody Allen

What’s on Garden Route text: vanessa rogers; pictures: supplied

VEHICULAR VETERANS 13-14 February

Motoring show The 20th George Old Car Show, driven

by Oakhurst Insurance, takes place at PW Botha College in George. The show draws hundreds of exhibitors showing off their veteran and classic cars (manufactured prior to 1975), as well as veteran farming equipment. Also on show will be hot rods and a wide variety of classic and new motorcycles. For more info, call 082 491 5254.

Please note: ‘Driving a Porsche in London is like bringing a Ming vase to a football game.’ – Douglas Adams

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SPIN IT OUT 27-29 February

MTB challenge Looking for a mountain-biking event where your entry includes three days of Garden Route scenery, a kit, all lunches and dinners, finisher souvenir, paramedic backup and all land-access permits?

How about giving the GR 300 or GRLITE a whirl? Your kit will be transported for you, and you can choose to stay in the race village or to book your own B&B online. Visit gardenrouteevents.co.za.

Please note: There is an uphill for every downhill, and a downhill for every uphill.

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Eat KwaZulu-Natal

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GOURMET GREEK FETA

BIG EASY WINEBAR & GRILL

Feta cheese is referenced in Homer’s The Odyssey. In this 8th-century BC Greek epic, feta is prepared by the man-eating cyclops, Polyphemos, who is described as having a cheese-making cave full of sheep’s-milk curds draining through woven baskets.

At Gourmet Greek in the KZN Midlands, cheese maker Filia Dimitriades is much prettier than the cyclops, but makes feta in the same traditional way, which can be bought directly from the Lion’s River farm or in selected Spars nationwide.

033 234 4338, 079 492 1137, thegourmetgreek.com.

Ernie Els is South Africa’s gourmet golfer, so it’s only fitting that his new Durban restaurant, Big Easy Winebar & Grill, offers elegant but unpretentious cuisine, with a commitment to local flavours and farm-to-table delivery.

Wine aficionados can enjoy the entire Ernie Els wine collection, a range of craft beers, whiskies, cognacs and cocktails, too. Head chef Janine Fourie has kindly supplied the recipe for her delicious steak masterpiece.

Hilton Hotel, 12-14 Walnut Road, Durban, 031 336 8166, bigeasydurban.co.za.

FEBRUARY 2016

200g beef fillet 1 tsp Dijon mustard 2 tsp crushed black pepper Rock salt Two pieces of bone marrow (about 6cm in size) 1 tsp horseradish sauce ½ tsp thyme leaves, chopped Salt and pepper Cauliflower purée 140g cauliflower florets 200ml fresh cream ¼ tsp garlic Salt and pepper to taste Charred vegetables ½ onion 100g leeks 6 Calamata olives, pitted Radish microgreens 10ml melted butter • Seal steaks on grill or griddle pan.

• Remove from the heat and spread mustard on both sides of steak, then roll in crushed black pepper and salt.

• Preheat oven to 180oC and roast bone marrow to taste (about 15 minutes). Cover the bottom of the marrowbone with foil to prevent the filling from seeping out. Once cooked, refrigerate to set.

• Mix the marrow with the horseradish sauce, chopped thyme and salt and pepper. Pipe the mixture back into the marrowbone.

• Boil cream, cauliflower, garlic and seasoning together until cooked, and purée cauliflower.

• Brush onions and leaks with butter and grill until charred. Add olives.

• Place the steak topped with marrowbone in the oven for six minutes at 190oC. Serve with cauliflower, onions, leaks and olives, and garnish with microgreens.

text: anna trapido; pictures: supplied

PEPPERED FILLET STEAK, ROASTED BONE MARROW, CAULIFLOWER PURÉE AND CHARRED VEGETABLES

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KWAZULU-NATAL | GUIDE

R230 Beleave

R450 WaeWest

R400 Rooi Rok Bokkie

R449 Mango

R347 SAM

R1 120 Kirsten Goss

R235 SAM

R529.95 Stuttafords

Keeping it local

Genna-Wae Webster’s shop SAM – South African Made – promotes unestablished brands created in the lovely Mzansi. Follow her on Instagram @samstoresa and @waewest or visit samstoresa.co.za. compiled by: johan labuschagne; pictures: supplied

R240 Pinksheep Clothing R650 ShashaWomen

GENNA-WAE’S FASHION TIP Have fun with your look. If you’re comfortable in what you wear, you can pull off nearly any style.

R430 Becca Blair R1 800 SAM kulula.com

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R1 000 Ida Elsje

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GUIDE | KWAZULU-NATAL

Getting horizontal

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here are loads of hotels that come across a little inflated – they’re great, but sometimes one wonders if the brochure or website perhaps oversold things a tad. And then there are places where the usual adjectives don’t suffice, and when you get there all you feel is pure delight.

Endless Horizons Boutique Hotel in Durban North falls into the latter category, and has the credentials to back it up – it’s been a winner in the International Luxury Hotel Awards for two years running in the Boutique Hotel category. With its sweeping 180-degree views of the ocean, impeccable service and serene luxury, you’d think Endless Horizons would be more of a household name, and yet it’s a bit of a hidden gem, away from the flash of Umhlanga and the bustle of Durban.

The hotel earns every one of its five stars. The 12 beautifully appointed rooms are decorated in natural and earthy colours, with a hint of an Eastern

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influence in the décor without being overt or kitsch. The rooms come in four categories: Executive; Deluxe; Standard; and Director Suites, and each is complete with complimentary Wi-Fi, surround sound and minibar, as well as LCD TV with DStv, air conditioning, tea and coffee facilities, and an extensive range of pampering amenities.

The hotel’s large wooden deck is the perfect place to take in a meal or sundowner, although a room-service breakfast in your dressing gown while you look over the sea is hard to beat too.

The food is outstanding, using fresh and seasonal ingredients sourced from local farmers and small businesses. The menu has an international influence, incorporating favourite dishes from around the world, and while elegant and created with superb attention to detail, it’s unpretentious, doing away with the overwrought stuffiness that can make fine dining a touch uncomfortable and stiff.

You’ll want to spend a good deal of time in the infinity swimming pool that adjoins the deck, and if you indulge a little more than you ordinarily would, you can burn some calories in the on-site gymnasium.

Durban North is also pretty central for exploring the beaches, city, malls and entertainment districts north or south.

If you’re not visiting solely for play, there are some great nooks to get some work done in comfortable, ergonomically designed chairs. The hotel is also equipped to host conferences, weddings and meetings for 10-70 people, with the venue including an overhead projector, AV and sound equipment as well as dedicated high speed Wi-Fi, block-out curtaining, padded chairs and air conditioning.

Do you need an excuse to treat yourself the next time you’re in Durban? If so, you’ve just found it.

108 Umhlanga Rocks Drive, Durban North, 031 564 0360, endlesshorizons.co.za.

pictures: supplied

Will Edgcumbe zens out at Endless Horizons Boutique Hotel in Durban.

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GARDEN ROUTE | GUIDE

BAOBAB POWDER Carbon dating indicates that baobab trees may live to be up to 3 000 years old. Plus, the pulp inside their fruits is so healthy that those who consume it may live forever. Africa’s superfood is packed with more vitamin C than oranges and more calcium than milk, and there are antioxidants and prebiotics galore.

The powdered form sold by ecoproducts.co.za is organic, veganfriendly and gluten free. Dietician Mpho Tshukudu says of the product: ‘I adore a baobab smoothie with raw pumpkin seeds. It is one of the healthiest and best-tasting smoothies I know. It tastes great when chilled and is an ideal breakfast or afternoon snack to keep low energy away.’

She has kindly shared her recipe:

text: anna trapido; pictures: supplied

BAOBAB SMOOTHIE 1 cup of pawpaw, cubed 1 cup plain yoghurt 4 Tbsps baobab powder 2 Tbsps pumpkin seeds • Blend together the pawpaw, yoghurt and baobab powder.

• Sprinkle pumpkin seeds on top.

• Chill and enjoy.

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Eat Garden Route OLIVE TREE RESTAURANT The history of chocolate begins in Meso-America, where there’s archaeological evidence of chocolate beverages dating back to 1900 BC. The Aztecs believed that cacao seeds were the gift of Quetzalcóatl, the god of wisdom. Anyone who has tasted the magnificently moist chocolate cake at the Olive Tree in Knysna knows that the Meso-Americans were right.

21 Main Street, Knysna, 044 382 5867.

RAASOIE ETHNIC INDIAN CUISINE Saffron is an epically ancient spice.

Greek legend tells of Crocus, an amorous youth who set out in pursuit of a woodland nymph, Smilax. Sadly, his pursuit resulted in the gods turning him

into a saffron-crocus flower (Crocus sativus). Crocus’s three radiant red/ orange stigmas set against pretty purple petals remain a symbol of his eternal passion for Smilax.

There are other versions of this story that have Crocus being hit on the head with a discus, and his blood becoming the red stigmas. Either way, the dried central stigmas of Crocus sativus serve up gloriously great taste, smell and colour sensations. Saffron’s woody, honeyed, almost-oaked-wine smell and bittersweet, earthy flavours are magnificent in plates of lamb peshwari at Raasoie Ethnic Indian Cuisine in Port Elizabeth. Available at the second branch in Knysna, too.

Plett River Lodge, N2, Plettenberg Bay, 044 533 5843.

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GUIDE | GARDEN ROUTE

R1 950 Sunglass Hut

R1 499 Seafolly

R350 Poetry

R7 090 Kirsten Goss

R999 Seafolly

R550 Poetry

R595 Michelle Ludek

R899 H&M

Kathryn Rossiter blogs on Becoming You, discussing beauty, travel and family, and providing inspiration and encouragement for women.

R249 H&M

R99 Spree

KATHRYN’S FASHION TIP

When buying classic pieces, I always buy the best-quality items I can afford, to ensure that I get many years of wear out of them.

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R599 Jean Kelly

R249 Spree R3 995 smacs.co.za

compiled by: johan labuschagne; pictures: supplied

Stay true to you

R89 H&M

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GARDEN ROUTE | GUIDE

Finding Gondwana Katie Bigelow finds her mojo in a reclaimed wilderness, just 45 minutes from George Airport.

pictures: supplied

F

or years, the conservation-minded folks at Gondwana Game Reserve have been turning back the clock, restoring some semblance of what the Southern Cape wildlands were like before humankind began its large-scale plundering. The southernmost game reserve in Africa, and the only fynbos reserve where all the Big-Five species roam free, Gondwana operates a dedicated protection programme for endangered species and has reintroduced threatened animals such as desert black rhino, Cape mountain zebra, cheetah and bontebok.

The 11 000-hectare reserve also has a breeding programme, which saw the first lions being born in the region since they were wiped out through hunting more than 150 years ago.

Aside from its conservation focus, Gondwana also has super accommodation: Kwena Lodge consists of 13 ultra-smart variations on rondavel-style Khoisan dwellings, complete with domed, thatched roofs, arranged in a horseshoe pattern

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(resembling a kraal) overlooking a valley at the foot of the Langeberg mountains.

The oversized huts have skylights for stargazing, walk-in wardrobes, open showers, cow hides on the floor, and stove fireplaces. Huge glass doors let in loads of light and afford excellent views of the Langeberg and Outeniqua mountains, even visible from the judiciously angled tub. The first time I was there, someone explained that these mountains contain the oldest rock on Earth.

In the past, I’ve been happy to spend an entire day sprawled out at the swimming pool, ogling the dramatic view from the lip of the ridge above the valley, or being professionally pampered and unknotted at the spa. Aside from game drives, the reserve can be explored on horseback or by mountain bike, and you can also traipse into the bush for a picnic – accompanied, of course. Children, meanwhile, can sign up for a ‘Junior Ranger’ programme with activities and animal-viewing excursions.

The latest addition at Gondwana, though, is an eco tented camp that makes it possible to experience a sense of truly sleeping in the wilderness. Of course, there’s still good food (braais and potjies cooked over the fire) and attentive service, and those tents (set on elevated decks) are far from ordinary, with snazzy open-to-the-elements showers and proper beds. There’s a nearby tented lounge-cum-bar and dining area, too.

Low-key luxury aside, though, the real joy is being absorbed by nature. The eco camp serves as the base for an immersive multi-day conservation programme, during which we learnt bush skills, tracked cheetahs, and got actively involved in many of the daily activities that wildlife managers and conservationists consider ‘work’. But to us city folk, it was a chance to participate in something meaningful, experiencing a genuine connection with a world seldom glimpsed.

R327, Mossel Bay, 021 555 0807, gondwanagr.co.za.

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GUIDE | TOP TIPPLE

Wine and dime

Connoisseurs agree: true investment lies in the first growths of Bordeaux, Burgundy and Champagne, but is it possible to purchase local wines today with the hope of generating future profit? Ingrid Graham finds out.

WHY INVEST IN WINE? Here are two reasons: firstly, to make money, and secondly, to establish and maintain your luxury lifestyle, prestige and status. Either way, an investment in time is also required, because investment-grade wines are not ready to drink or sell when bought.

WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW Know that the jury is still debating whether there are any SA products worthy of being called iconic or investment grade.

However, most agree that there are many gems worth purchasing.

Know the producers, their reputations, accolades and achievements. Know the winemakers themselves, as they move around if they’re not the owner of a specific farm. Select a few producers that have established a

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good reputation. Try to get onto their exclusive allocation list. Be committed to buying at least one case per year and two in exceptional vintages. After five years, you should have a fine vertical selection from your chosen producers, and you’ll be ready to make a profit on your original purchase.

Know the regions and the predominant styles produced by each. For example: the Malmesbury/Swartland area has a reputation for Shiraz; cooler climates such as Elgin and Constantia produce exceptional Sauvignon Blanc; the premium area of Stellenbosch produces Pinotage, Cabernet Sauvignon and Chardonnay; while grapes used in port and sweet dessert wines come from warmer climates such as Worcester and the Klein Karoo.

Know vintage variations. Although we don’t suffer extreme weather conditions and variations in climate as in northern countries, we do have events that could affect the vintage.

These may include dry weather conditions, excessive rain or wind, frost and even fire, as experienced in recent years. A serious investor watches the vintage reports.

WHERE TO STORE YOUR TREASURE? You may opt to keep your cache at home – in which case, you’ll need a proper storage facility such as a cellar. It is also imperative to establish provenance if your wine is for resale, because buyers will want to know the source and history of their purchase.

Keep purchase records!

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TOP TIPPLE | GUIDE

pictures: pushkarevskyy/shutterstock.com, pagina/shutterstock.com

The Bergkelder Vinotèque Wine Bank allows you to purchase a selection of wines from estates such as Alto, Allesverloren, Jacobsdal, Le Bonheur, Stellenzicht, Uitkyk and others. For an annual fee, your wine will be cellared in optimum conditions. A tasting panel regularly tastes the wine in the Vinotèque selection, and issues annual reports on how your wine is developing. You’ll be informed when your wine has reached optimum maturity and is ready for consumption. vinoteque.co.za

WHICH WINES AND WHERE TO FIND THEM? Look for wines that have proven their worth consistently over decades. The Cape Winemakers Guild (CWG) is a group of 46 winemakers with proven track records, who make their artisanal wines especially for auction to the public.

The annual CWG Auction attracts wine buyers, private collectors and treasure seekers from across the globe. You need to register as a buyer before the auction – and if you're unable to attend, you can bid telephonically or by proxy.

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The Guild focuses on quality rather than quantity, setting benchmarks for the industry.

Investors can sample before they buy when the CWG Showcase travels to major centres around the country. capewinemakersguild.com You can also purchase a ticket to attend the famous Nederburg Wine Auction, but only liquor-licence holders may bid. So get friendly with your local fine-wine purveyor in time for the 2016 event on 16 and 17 September.

The stringent selection process by national and international industry experts ensures consistent quality and exclusivity. A highlight at the 40th Auction was the 1800 JaubertTradauw Joubert Family Muscat (275ml), which fetched an impressive R42 500 – equating to R154 545 per litre. nederburgauction.co.za

TOO DAUNTING? GET A WINE ADVISOR TO HELP YOU NAVIGATE THE MAZE Wade Bales of The Wade Bales Wine Society established the Wine Futures Plan in 2001. Over the years, Wade has sourced limited-release wines from

winemakers who set aside limited editions for discerning customers and connoisseurs.

Wade advises clients to mature their wines for at least five years. ‘The scarcer they become, the more desirable they are,’ he says. He also offers optimum cellaring should you require it. Look out for the Kanonkop Black Label 2014 at R8 700 per six bottles. Limited quantities of the super-premium wine have been produced from 62-year-old vines. Cellarmaster Abrie Beeslaar says that whilst being elegantly drinkable in its youth, it will develop magnificently over the next 25 years. wadebaleswinesociety.co.za So whether you’re investing for resale or for your and your family's enjoyment only, remember that even the best wine has a shelf life before ‘precious becomes plonk’. Therefore, take precautions, insure and assure, and don’t forget to stipulate who gets the wine collection to prevent a family feud on divorce or death. * Alcohol sale prohibited to persons under 18 years of age.

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TURN THE VOLUME UP

The Extra Volume range from Moroccan Oil gives fine, limp hair a boost of natural-looking volume, while gently cleansing and conditioning each strand.

R310 Moroccan Oil

R290 Moroccan Oil

BEAUTIFYING FOUNDATION

POUT PERFECT

For healthy, young-looking skin, look no further than this creamy, matte foundation from Catrice Cosmetics.

Extended use is proven to brighten pigmentation marks, leaving your skin radiant.

This new range of lipsticks from essence feels light on your lips, providing them with subtle colour and fantastic shine.

Colour me beautiful

LIP SERVICE

This eight-hour treatment keeps your lips soft, smooth and healthy looking.

Especially great to use during summer.

RED FLAG

Red lips will never go out of fashion. Make sure you have this velvety lipstick from wet n wild in your arsenal for those impresshis-socks-off dates.

R132.95 Catrice

R43.95 wet n wild

GLITTER GIRL

Add some extra sparkle to your day with Catrice Cosmetics’ new blush, designed with just a hint of glitter to give your cheeks a natural glow.

LOVE, ROSIE

Blend this quartet of shades from Catrice Cosmetics to attain a natural blush and texture perfection.

R69.95 Catrice

R49.95 Catrice

R195 Elizabeth Arden

TASTY TREAT

R47.95 essence

BERRY ME UP

Give your cheeks the pick-me-up they need with essence’s matt touch blush. Available in: Peach me up! And Berry me up!

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Catrice Cosmetics’ new fruity range of lipsticks will leave your lips deliciously kissable.

Available in glossy and matte.

R69.95 Catrice

GO WILD

This floral hand wash will cleanse your skin, leaving it refreshed and delicately fragranced with wild rose and sandalwood.

R75.00 Morlage & Yorke

SHINE ON

This Wild Shine nail lacquer applies quickly, leaving a brilliant, super-shiny finish.

R23.95 wet n wild

text: jayne macé-ferguson, lynn berggren, amy stimson; pictures: supplied

R38.95 essence

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BEAUTY | GUIDE

INDULGE A LITTLE

Take a break with this indulgent raspberry-and-rose bath wash, which will leave you smelling like a dream and feeling like a queen.

R100 Smittens

R59.95 Café de Bain

RUB A SCRUB

This Smitten exfoliating cloth effectively removes excess grime and 99% of bacteria, leaving your skin smooth and healthy!

LASH AND DASH

Create perfect, extra-long lashes in one quick and easy step.

BLENDING IN

BEAUITUL LIPS

Fluorescein-based dye found in the pH Matchmaker lip formula senses the pH level of your skin, and adjusts within 60 seconds to create your perfect lip colour.

Protect your lips with this all-weather, SPF15 treatment stick. It helps to moisturise, soften and smooth your lips.

R159.95 Physicians Formula

R84.95 wet n wild

HAIR REPAIR

Biosense is the answer for chemically processed or porous hair, sealing those pesky split ends and giving your locks a natural shine.

R195 Elizabeth Arden

WATER SAVVY

text: jayne macé-ferguson, lynn berggren, amy stimson; pictures: supplied

For summer days at the beach or around the pool, this waterproof liner is your foolproof friend. The curved tip makes application a breeze, especially great for a cat-eye look.

R59.95 Catrice

R94.95 Caribbean Tan

TANNED UP

R94.95 Caribbean Tan

PINKY AND THE BRAIN

Nudes, pinks and pastels are all the rage this summer. Keep up with Catrice Cosmetics’ new nail-polish range, available in a variety of nude, pink and blush colours.

R49.95 Catrice

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Caribbean Tan’s bronzing milk gives skin a sun-kissed sheen, while the sun-protection spray is designed to enhance and accelerate a tan.

R35 per sachet Biosense

R84.95 Catrice

SMOKE GETS IN YOUR EYES

Create seductive smokey eyes with this luxurious deluxe trio eyeshadow.

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GUIDE | WATCH

Watch this...

Celebrate love, fashion, awkwardness, superpowered psychosis, and flesh-eating Jane Austen spin-offs this month at the movies.

THE DRESSMAKER

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DEADPOOL Release date: 12 February The latest Marvel Comics film, in trademark experiment-gone-wrong style, is Deadpool, in which an assassin is granted super-healing powers that drive him to the brink of madness. The very consciously ‘super’ superhero film already has Comic-Con and Marvel enthusiasts fangirling worldwide.

Starring Ryan Reynolds as the dubious antihero, Deadpool is out to redefine the superhero class, with fast-talking, smartalecky voiceovers, fourth-wall breaking, and the irresponsibility that comes with great power.

Anticipatometer: n n n n n

PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES Release date: 4 March If the title puts you off, it’s probably just as well, because this book adaptation of Seth Grahame-Smith’s parody is nothing like the stately period dramas you’re used to. This Lizzy Bennet (Lily James) is a swashbuckling martial artist who’s ready to rid the world of a vicious plague, and win the man at the same time. It’s a film that relishes in undercutting expectations: still the classic girl power you remember, but fighting zombies in what is basically a gory zombie-warrior story tastefully disguised in Regency-era muslin frocks.

Anticipatometer: n n n n

text: amy stimson; pictures: supplied

See page 14 for details

DEADPOOL

HOW TO BE SINGLE

MOVIE GIVEAWAYS

Release date: 12 February In a film cheekily set to be released on Valentine’s weekend, Rebel Wilson (from Pitch Perfect fame) stars alongside Dakota Johnson in an adventure bringing to life the novel of the same name by Liz Tuccillo (co-author of He’s Just Not That Into You).

Expect ‘real-life’ experiences, hilarious and/or awkward romantic meetings, and a good possibility that everyone will be happily settled before the credits roll.

Whatever happens (or doesn’t), there’s bound to be a hefty dose of Wilson’s unique quirk and humour.

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PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES

THE DRESSMAKER

Release date: 5 February Kate Winslet stars as a snide, winsome fashion designer in this unique patchwork of sardonic characters, love, revenge and haute couture. Tilly Dunnage, returning to her small Australian 1950s hometown, finds herself confronting small-town gossipers, rumoured murders and her ailing mother, bringing dramatic stitching to the suspicious inhabitants of the Outback.

Lauded for its lively, off-the-wall narrative style, and starring big names such as Judy Davis, Liam Hemsworth and Hugo Weaving, this film adaptation of the novel by Rosalie Ham unites playful plots and beautiful storytelling, doing it in style from start to finish.

Anticipatometer: n n n n

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READ | GUIDE

Library lounge Get your lounge on with these new literary larks.

WHERE’S ZUMA?

text: diana fletcher, anthony sharpe; pictures: supplied

101 KRUGER TALES

EDITED BY JEFF GORDON LEADWOOD PUBLISHING With 101 Kruger Tales, the world of literature has achieved the written version of YouTube – and, believe me, it is just as addictive. This fascinating collection of first-hand accounts, contributed by the ordinary visitors of Kruger National Park, covers everything from incredible animal sightings to some of humanity’s greatest follies.

There are naked Germans bathing in crocodile-infested waters, lions opening car doors, and a man on the receiving end of a co-ordinated monkey attack.

Prepare to giggle in disbelief, tut in despair, and turn pages like you’re clicking on cat videos.

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KOBUS GALLOWAY PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE South Africa gets its very own version of the well-loved Where’s Wally? series with Where’s Zuma?, which challenges readers to find our beloved president across the countryside. From the arms deal to the courtroom, from his own wedding(s) to the Gupta wedding, see if you can spot Jacob Zuma in these hilarious cartoons. Find him in the election queue, in Parliament and at Nkandla. Whether he’s travelling in a blue-light brigade or in the darkness thanks to load-shedding, can you see him? It’s all tongue-in-cheek and good fun for adults with a sense of humour, and the kids, too.

POCKET GUIDE: INSECTS OF SOUTH AFRICA

MIKE PICKER & CHARLES GRIFFITHS STRUIK NATURE If you can sit staring at a bush or patch of grass for ages, ignoring the world around you (and the confused looks of others), in the hope of spotting a flash of iridescent carapace, then this is the book for you. This new pocket guide covers some 260 common and interesting South African insects, making it possible to identify a wide range of species. Each is described with its key identification features, a colour photograph and distribution map. An illustrated quickreference guide on the inside front and back covers makes it quick and easy to navigate to the correct insect group.

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GUIDE | LISTEN

Listen up Summer doesn’t last forever, but good music does.

Spoil your ears with these hot new releases.

IONS

EN SESS OWN LIST R -G E M O H

EXPERIENCE THE AL BAIRRE SHOW WITH AL BAIRRE EXPERIENCE INDEPENDENT End-of-summer-holiday blues be gone!

Al Bairre has decked themselves, and their new album, in every colourful thing you can imagine with the twangy, upbeat songs that have made them so popular with both local and international audiences.

The album includes new ventures into symphonic synths, more than doo-wahs from the Johnson twins, and audible musical variation. So prepare yourself to bop and jiggle happily along to what some are calling an excellent example of the group’s growing musical maturity.

Perhaps indie-pop, strumming-on-thebeach vibes have been overdone, but for an album of happy, you could do worse than Al Bairre’s mini-LP.

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SUZANNE

VUURBESTAND GOLDSTAR There can be no denying the power of songstress Suzanne’s voice. After her debut at age 10 in 1997, Suzanne’s career has spanned 18 years and six albums, and now includes her most recent release, Vuurbestand.

This album acts as an ode to nostalgia and a tribute to her love for her husband, as Suzanne, undaunted by the pressure of the industry, writes all her songs with hubby Jacobus Uys. Unfortunately, this makes most of the tracks sound similar, except for ‘Somerson’, which is a welcome relief from her usual style.

Die-hard fans will love this album, but for the new listener there’s nothing that’s really unique. So if you’re not already a fan of Suzanne, there’s no need to queue at midnight for this one.

UP-AND-COMING COLLAB

WHO? Solo and Buks – the hottest new collaboration on the South African hip-hop scene.

WHAT? This award-winning duo has collaborated not only on the album, but also on their movement BETR (Body Every Thing Right) Gang, which focuses on balancing artistry with the current hip-hop landscape.

Their album We Need a Title sounds like world-class hip-hop, even if it includes obvious Americanisms.

WHERE? The album is available online at betrgang.co.za for as much as you think it’s worth.

‘We want to afford everybody the opportunity to listen to the album,’ they say – whether you can afford zero rand, or want to put your money into supporting their #BETRPayAnyAmount.

text: diana fletcher, amy stimson; pictures: supplied

AL BAIRRE

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LISTEN | GUIDE

Put your

hands up

for Mr Le Grand It’s been a decade since Fedde Le Grand produced the dance track that’s widely credited as house music’s salvation.

Ahead of this month’s Ultra Music Festival, Keith Bain talks to the dance-music reinventor, and discovers the soul of an artist.

When I started out, most teenagers were dreaming of being football players or firemen. When I told people I wanted to be a DJ, they’d laugh, and tell me there’s no money in it. It was still such a small scene, especially in Holland. I always just wanted to be one of Holland’s top 10 DJs – that was my dream. That already seemed like a stretch. So everything else that’s happened is extra, and I’ve tried to embrace it all and be thankful.

My mom was really into classical music – she used to sing a bit, too. She listened to Sting and Enya. My dad liked James Brown, Bootsy Collins – he preferred funk.

My parents were quite relaxed, and there were few rules, but there were three things that were non-negotiable in my

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family: we had to take ballroom dancing; do sports; and play a musical instrument.

I’m thankful for that now.

Because I was obligated, I hated the idea of playing an instrument. I chose the keyboard, because that was kind of cool compared to, say, the violin. At least it had little buttons and electronics. After three years, I quit, though. I have dyslexia and couldn’t read the notes – I had to learn everything by heart. At a certain point, the musical pieces became too big to play that way, and I wasn’t fast enough – that’s why I quit and didn’t play music at all for quite a while.

Before ‘Put Your Hands Up 4 Detroit’ became a hit, I’d been playing a lot in Holland. To get work, I had to do

everything myself. Not only was it difficult to penetrate the dance scene, but – to be honest – no one liked my music. People thought it was weird and too different from what everyone else was making. I had a really hard time getting my records signed to labels, so I started my own parties, and established my own record label. That bolstered my career in Holland.

I really wanted to make soulful house – similar to what you find on the Defected label – but I didn’t know where to get the right samples or how to get them cleared, so I experimented by replacing those disco samples with electronic sounds.

That’s kind of how I came up with what you’d call ‘electro house’ today. At the time, it brought a different perspective

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GUIDE | LISTEN

to a certain kind of music. It was basically a lack of equipment and knowledge, driven by a desire to make music.

I released ‘Put Your Hands Up 4 Detroit’ on my own label and it took off – by public demand, really, and because it got so much support from DJs and labels like Ministry of Sound. It also crossed over, almost everywhere; house DJs were playing it, but so were hip-hop DJs, and rap artists were using it. It’s interesting the way it breached boundaries.

I can’t take complete credit for the shift that happened. I think it was a combination of ‘Hands Up 4 Detroit’, Eric Prydz’s ‘Call On Me’ and Mason’s ‘Exceeder’. Those three tracks came out around about the same time, and it was the first time in a long while that three house tracks entered the Top 40.

I think it’s important to keep mainstream influences to a minimum.

After my third UK Top 5 record, I deliberately started making more underground music. Back then people

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didn’t take you seriously as a ‘real DJ’ if you were making commercial music.

I wanted to play in the cool, serious dance clubs, not venues where I was expected to play my three hits interspersed with hip-hop. I really just wanted to play house music. So I made a conscious shift to minimise the vocals and be on a more purely dance-floor trajectory.

As an artist, you go through different phases, influenced by what’s going on in the outside world – that’s why we had the Renaissance, and movements like Rococo, and abstract expressionism in art. But, whether you’re a painter or musician, there’s always something in all your work that makes it yours. There’s always a certain ‘drive’ in my tracks, and a preference for certain kinds of sound and chords, but there’s also a certain progression in my music – a result of going through different phases, partly influenced by what’s happening around me.

As a producer, I can’t cope with doing the same thing over and over with just

slight variations. There are producers who can happily cling to the same five sounds and same kind of beats all the time. That would bore the hell out of me. Dance music has enough limitations already, without being further restricted by wanting to work very narrowly.

My tracks tend to reflect a variety of influences. That’s the great thing about being creative – the endless possibilities.

Fedde Le Grand performs alongside Skrillex, Tiësto, Seth Troxler and many others at Ultra South Africa in Jo’burg on 26-27 February, and Cape Town on 27-28 February. For more info, visit ultrasouthafrica.com.

pictures: supplied, kat grudko photography

‘AS AN ARTIST, YOU GO THROUGH DIFFERENT PHASES, INFLUENCED BY WHAT’S GOING ON IN THE OUTSIDE WORLD’

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GAMES | GUIDE

Twiddle your thumbs Be a PokÊmon, a Stone-Age hunter or even a plant with this month’s digital delights.

FAR CRY PRIMAL PS4, Xbox One, PC Welcome to the Stone Age, a time of extreme danger, limitless adventure and a very short life span for early humans who find themselves at the bottom of the food chain.

As the last survivor of your hunting group, you learn to craft a deadly arsenal to unleash upon the giant mammoths and sabre-

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toothed tigers roaming the wilderness, and develop skills allowing your tribe to grow and ultimately survive.

Fending off fierce predators will not be your only task, as you have to outsmart enemy tribes to conquer the land of Oros.

Stalk enemy outposts and plan attacks with weapons and tools crafted from the bones of slain beasts. Mastering fire will allow you to explore tactical options during the day, and keep predators away at night.

Witness the rich setting of the Stone Age across the land of Oros, as you lay

claim to the earth before the time of man, and become the apex predator.

Free additional content when preordered through BT Games!

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POKÉMON SUPER MYSTERY DUNGEON Nintendo 3DS Experience an amazing world where Pokémon speak, go on incredible adventures,

PLANTS VS ZOMBIES: GARDEN WARFARE 2 PS4, Xbox One, PC A bigger, better and meaner game is in store for fans, as the stakes have been raised in the sequel to the hilarious, action-packed backyard shooter. The zombies have conquered and the plants are finally on the offensive!

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and battle countless enemies! Play as a Pokémon of your choice, and select a partner to assist you in the quest to investigate the nature of mysterious, terrifying reports of fellow Pokémon being turned into stone.

Set out in a grand adventure as you depart the Serene Village, after acquiring membership to the Pokémon Expedition Society, and explore and map the unknown dungeons in your quest to save the world.

The game features all 720 currently released Pokémon as of 2015, allowing you to select an entity to control from all six main-series generations, including Riolu. Online features allow players to rescue fellow Pokémon when in trouble, and you can even rescue your team with a new Pokémon team within the same dungeon.

Embrace a Pokémon gaming experience as you journey into an unknown world, led by a mesmerising story and a scintillating soundtrack.

Multiplayer mayhem spans across game modes, with up to 24 players – try the all-new Herbal Assault or the Graveyard Ops. Healthy options for delinquent fun are available for either side.

Players can edit abilities and customise their soldiers from a selection of 100 playable characters and 14 classes. Two four-player, co-operative modes and six 24-player game modes allow unlimited crazy fun with friends.

There are also options to play solo or split-screen (consoles only), allowing co-operative gameplay across any mode in the game, as you battle on a variety of maps – from lush gardens to the moon itself – just bursting open with personality and humour.

Remember to plant this exciting title in your gaming diary – pre-order before release from BT Games to get additional free content!

text and pictures: supplied by BT games

GUIDE | GAMES

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GUIDE | TECH

The future’s a gamble

Which of today’s technology will stand the test of time? And what will we still be using in five, 10, 20 years from now? Andy Walker of Gearburn.com places his bets.

VIRTUAL REALITY SMARTER SMARTWATCHES

SASSY, SMART CLOTHING It might seem far-fetched now, but New Balance and Intel have already signed a deal to place processing chips in shoes.

Clothing is perhaps the last frontier of wearable technology and, slowly, companies such as Under Armour, Nike and the aforementioned New Balance are letting tech giants make their clothing smarter. But think of the benefits: running shoes that monitor your fatigue levels; T-shirts that can charge smartphones; and dresses that can change shape and colour based on certain atmospheric conditions. The possibilities are endless. Who knows?

In 10 years time we may very well have neckties that tie themselves.

MORE DETAILED TELEVISIONS When you're not flying through outer space in the comfort of your living room, you’ll want to snuggle down and watch Netflix or ShowMax with loved ones. A new technology dubbed Quantum Dots will undoubtedly be the television standard in five years time, allowing faster refresh rates and more detailed pictures. OLEDs currently rule the roost, thanks to their low-power consumption and deep colours, but one thing is for sure: televisions will be around for a long time yet.

Current smart devices aren't going to age well at all, but smartwatches will get more useful, more powerful and more integral to our daily lives in the next five years. Slowly, these fashion accessories are getting more adept at monitoring your lifestyle, tracking your health and keeping tabs on your online life. Some devices already have built-in SIM cards, which means placing calls from your wrist will be entirely possible.

SOLAR-POWER PACKS Powerbanks are now part and parcel of a techuser’s arsenal, but their biggest flaw is their need for charging. Enter the solar-power bank. These little batteries are fitted with panels that absorb the sun’s goodness, and don't need to be plugged into a socket to refill. As solar power becomes a worldwide standard – for devices such as Tesla's Powerwall, for instance – you can expect this pocket-sized technology to be a mainstay.

pictures: cobalt88/shutterstock.com, marynka/shutterstock.com, istock

There's no getting around this one, especially since practically all companies – from Facebook to Valve – have their fingers in a virtual-realityheadset pie of some sort. Virtual reality (VR) is exactly that, and provides its wearer with the ultimate brand of escapism. The Oculus Rift launched last month, and the PlayStation VR should arrive this year, too. But it’s clear that as the technology matures, gains more power and improved user-friendliness, VR will become a force to be reckoned with, from the entertainment world to the medical fraternity.

For more insightful gadget and gaming news, check out gearburn.com.

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andi on N d n a e Thenjiw m KZN o r f s l r i og being tw it big e d a m who’ve

Thenjiwe Moseley is so hot right now we had to put her on ice…

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‘THE FEAR OF GIVING PEOPLE A BAD PRODUCT DRIVES ME. I DON’T EVER WANT TO LEAVE THE STAGE WITHOUT HAVING GIVEN IT MY ALL’

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RAPPER | CHAT

Cassper the friendly

rapper

Thenjiwe Moseley chats to Cassper Nyovest about his dreams, Kanye West and breaking records.

Thenjiwe Moseley: Cassper, what brings you the greatest joy?

Cassper Nyovest: The feeling of making my dreams a reality, knowing that I have 100% ownership of my ideas, my work and my sweat. And the fact that I don’t work for anybody, so I have freedom.

Being able to provide for myself also makes me happy.

TM: Do you read any books?

CN: I’m not a big reader, but I’m currently reading Rich Dad, Poor Dad. TM: Would you recommend it?

CN: I haven’t finished it yet but, so far, I would. It seems like a great book. I am learning so much.

TM: And what are the last two items on your credit-card statement?

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CN: I don’t have a credit card, actually.

TM: [Laughs] So you don’t live on debt.

If you could have an ideal dinner party, which two people would you invite, dead or alive?

CN: Kanye West and President Obama.

TM: Okay, big dreamer [laughs]. And it’s possible. You have made the impossible possible, so I believe you can do that, too.

What’s your most prized possession?

CN: I think my health.

TM: Oh, that’s good. You recently filled up the Ticketpro Dome, and we’re very proud of you. Do you think anyone else can do it? And what does it take?

CN: I can’t think of anybody right now who’d fill up the Dome. But I think there are a lot of great artists in the country,

and I think anybody who would attempt it, and who would put in enough effort, could pull it off, especially if they have great ideas and great people behind them. It takes a lot of courage and faith.

You have to be a very strong believer in whatever you believe. It’s a lot of hard work, it’s very demanding, and it costs a lot of money to do something like that.

TM: What’s your most important prayer that has been answered?

CN: My career, everything in my life, everything I’ve prayed for. I think the most important thing is to thank Jesus and thank God for keeping me safe. I go through a lot of things and put myself through a lot of problems, and through it all I’ve been protected.

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TM: What’s the one thing that people would be surprised to know about you?

CN: I’m shy.

TM: Are you shy?

CN: Yes, I’m very shy.

TM: And what do you use to overcome your shyness when you’re on stage?

CN: Passion. I become so scared and then the passion just takes over. The fear of giving people a bad product drives me.

I don’t ever want to leave the stage without having given it my all.

TM: What is the one thing you wish you knew before you became a celebrity?

CN: I wish I knew how to handle the negativity that comes with it. I thought that people would celebrate with you when you do well, but people look for every negative thing in your life when you make it. Like, you’re such a phenomenon that people look for every flaw. That’s the one thing I wish someone had told me.

TM: Is there anyone who has influenced you to become the great success that you are?

CN: One would be Kanye West, he’s always preaching about his dreams, and the importance of going for your goals.

My other influence is Hip Hop Pantsula.

Coming from where I’m from, HHP was a guy we used to look up to, and he did great things with his career. These two people really showed me my way.

TM: What do you think of social media?

Do you think it’s good or bad for your brand, for any celebrity?

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RAPPER | CHAT

CN: I think social media is a great platform for your career. It’s helped me.

I don’t get priority places from radio, but with social media you get connected like that, directly, so I think it’s a positive platform for my career. But I also think there’s a lot of negativity in it: people who wish they were you and say bad things, and cyber-bullying.

TM: Out of all your songs, which one has the most personal meaning to you?

CN: On my brand-new album, ‘Refiloe’ is the most personal song that I’ve sung.

Originally it speaks about the relationship of my parents, growing up, and my family, and how it affected me. I also speak a little bit about social media. Refiloe is also my real name, so it’s a very personal song.

TM: And is the album out?

CN: Yeah, the album is out. You can find it at any music store, and on iTunes. The title of the album is Refiloe.

TM: What else can we expect from you in 2016? Any more records that you’re planning to break?

CN: Yeah, I’m attempting to go double platinum with this album, and I’m also doing an important show at Orlando Stadium, which I’m trying to get at a capacity of 40 000 people. That’s double what I did at the Dome.

TM: I was in London in December, and a lot of South Africans and people in London were asking about you. Are you planning on taking any shows there?

CN: Yeah. I did a Euro tour last year in July, and we have planned to go back there, you know, once or twice a year.

TM: How was the reception in Zimbabwe? I heard you killed it.

CN: Zimbabwe’s probably one of my biggest fanbases. When I go there, they treat me like royalty: when I get off the plane, everyone’s cheering. It’s overwhelming actually, because

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‘SEEING SOMEONE THAT I KNOW, COMING FROM THE TOWNSHIP, ACCUMULATING THAT WEALTH INSPIRED ME’ I wouldn’t expect Zimbabwe to be familiar with my music.

TM: If you weren’t a musician, what profession would you have chosen?

CN: I think music is my only love, but looking at the talent that I have to push my product, I think marketing. I’ve got a natural talent for marketing.

TM: Ah, that’d be great. Maybe you should market me.

CN: Yeah!

TM: Is there anything you would like the readers to know about you? Any misconceptions that you’d like to put straight before we conclude?

CN: Yeah, there’s one thing people misunderstand about me. You know how people say I show off a lot and whatever?

For me, coming from the township, I was inspired by people, you know, who had

fancy cars and stuff. Seeing someone that I know, coming from the township, accumulating that wealth inspired me.

Every time I display [my wealth] it’s to show that I come from the same place, and I made something of myself.

There’s a misconception that I think I’m better than some people, and that’s not true. The truth is that I’m trying to inspire people.

TM: What advice do you have for a young boy in the township who wants to be Cassper?

CN: Just listen to the voice inside of you, trust yourself, and work very hard. Keep God in your heart, guiding you, and you’ll do very well.

TM: Thank you very much for your time, Cassper, and good luck in your career.

CN: All right, thank you.

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CHAT | PERFORMER

The

Road

less travelled

Thenjiwe Moseley chats to The Road co-star Nandi Mngoma about first-borns, falling in love and polygamy.

Thenjiwe Moseley: How has the journey been for you, coming from KZN? Nandi Mngoma: It’s been a riveting experience, because Jo’burg has so many opportunities. And there’s nothing better than knowing that you can survive the big city without compromising your morals. I’m proud of myself. You can achieve what you want through hard work, and a lot of rejection.

brother is my mom’s everything. I mean, yes, she has nine children – but the rest of us are just the add-ons. Your first-born goes through so much with you, and so for me, my first-born was music.

TM: You’ve mentioned in the media that both your parents are academics – a doctor and a lawyer – how did you manage to convince them of your choice to follow a career in the arts?

‘FAILURE IS SOMETHING THAT HAPPENS TO EVERYONE, SO DON’T BE ASHAMED WHEN IT HAPPENS TO YOU’ TM: Between being a TV presenter, a musician and now an actress, which one do you think you love the most?

NM: Musician! She’s like my first-born.

Like, everyone knows, to a mother, your first-born is everything. That’s why my

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NM: Oh! Well, I didn’t [laughs]. I was unsuccessful. My dad would pay for recording sessions for me to record demos, but only during the holidays.

My mother wouldn’t take me to auditions and that. At the same time, it was

important for my parents to make sure that there was some form of security in my life and career.

TM: What would you say to a young girl from KZN, who’s got the looks, who’s got the talent, who’s got the dream, and who wants to come to Jo’burg and make it happen?

NM: It’s actually more than just giving advice. In KZN, we come from a very patriarchal society, where we place importance on how someone looks more than academics – because, obviously, it’s more important for us to attract a male. We need to change that culture, to prioritise the fact that there’s nothing more attractive than a female who not only has a great personality, but also has substance and is smart. That’s very important. You need to know that you’ll be rejected, but failure is something that happens to everyone, so don’t be ashamed when it happens to you.

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TM: What do you think every woman should do once in her life?

NM: That’s a good question! You know, I don’t want to say this, but I’m being honest: fall in love.

Just once in your life.

TM: [Laughs] NM: It’s so good.

TM: Even if it’s with the wrong guy?

NM: [Laughs] Well, hopefully the right guy.

TM: Even if he already has three wives?

NM: [Laughs] I nearly choked! Okay, I would say you need to fall in love with yourself.

TM: With yourself?

NM: Absolutely.

TM: But don’t you think sometimes when people are in love with themselves, they become impossible – they become divas and think they’re bigger than everyone else?

NM: No, don’t be conceited; there’s a difference. When you genuinely love yourself, you don’t have insecurity.

You’re more selfless than selfish.

TM: Nandi, what’s your most important prayer that has been answered?

NM: To be able to feed myself, and to enjoy being alive while doing what I love: the arts. That is definitely a dream come true. And to inspire young ladies in a way that has substance, like inspiring them to feel good in their skin, which is something I’ve always fought for, and it’s incredible to see it actually happening.

TM: I know that you are a proud African woman – you wear your hair short.

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‘IF I’M EVER BLESSED WITH A SON, I’M CALLING HIM SHAKA’

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NM: I do, yes!

TM: [Laughs] #IndianWeavesMustFall.

NM: [Laughs] TM: How proud are you of your culture as a Zulu woman?

NM: Yoh! If I’m ever blessed with a son, I’m calling him Shaka.

TM: Okay, Nandi. Shaka … I get it, [laughs].

NM: We’ll make it work somehow. I love the story, I mean, even with uQueen Nandi, she was so amazing, so inspiring in many ways, and so for me, I’m still part of the culture.

TM: And as a proud Zulu girl, what do you think of polygamy?

NM: I’ll be very honest, I think it’s a choice, as long as you don’t affect others. In traditional Zulu culture, there weren’t a lot of people in polygamist relationships, because polygamy meant you needed money. So polygamy wasn’t something that would happen often. So it’s someone’s choice and you can never bash that, it’s a human right, once again.

But for me, no, I could never.

TM: But if you were married and your husband decided to take a second wife, wouldn’t you take that as his choice?

NM: [Laughs] Listen, I would never!

TM: [Laughs] NM: There’s no way.

TM: [Laughs] NM: No, not for me. And the nice thing is that you can make that known.

TM: So you just take your Shaka and run?

NM: Definitely!

TM: [Laughs] What do you think of comedy in South Africa?

NM: I love it. South Africans have a certain wit. What I love most is that

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PERFORMER | CHAT

comedy’s coming to you in vernacular, because there are some jokes that you just can’t tell in English. I love the fact that we pride ourselves on where we’re from. And we’re spoilt for choice.

I appreciate it so much.

TM: Who is the best comedienne in South Africa? And take into account who’s interviewing you.

NM: Oh! TM: [Laughs] NM: I’ve watched local female comediennes, and I love you guys because you have wit. You represent two segments of Zulu culture: the very melodramatic and the loud, over the top. And then there’s also what many people don’t know about Zulu culture: the wit – you have to be sharp to get it.

I like that combination.

TM: In The Road, you play Zoe. Are there any similarities between Nandi and Zoe? NM: [Laughs] None whatsoever. Not even where she’s from. Her father was never really present in her life, and that’s the reason why she wants revenge and stuff. In my case, I did have a dad and I’m blessed in that way.

But that’s why I took the role, because it was very different from who I am.

You really do have to dig deep and do research.

TM: See how the other half lives?

NM: Yes. And it’s a beautiful thing, because that’s the story of our country.

And it’s a beautiful story. It’s amazing how even women from KwaMashu can become royals, comedians and now actresses. That was never the story. It was meant to be that you were a maid or a garden boy and only that – not that there’s anything wrong with being

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‘I LOVE THE FACT THAT WE PRIDE OURSELVES ON WHERE WE’RE FROM’

a maid or garden boy. Your resilience and determination are so inspiring, because that’s not how the story was meant to be.

TM: That is true. The prayer used to be, ‘I pray to get a good madam in Umhlanga,’ but now we pray to buy a good house in Umhlanga.

NM: Thank you. That’s exactly it.

TM: When can we expect your new album?

NM: I don’t want to put a date on it, but definitely this year.

TM: In your interview on Vuzu, you said once you hit 500 000 followers on Twitter, you’ll release a new album. So what happens if it takes 10 years to hit the 500 000?

NM: [Gasps] No! Did they put that on Vuzu?

TM: [Laughs] Yes, they did.

NM: I wanted to delete that.

TM: What if you’re just two followers short of getting the 500 000? Does it mean we’ll have to wait 10 years?

NM: Well, then you guys will have to wait! I’m joking, I’ll release it anyway.

TM: Is there anything that you’d like to add before we conclude?

NM: I think it’s important for us to just work. You see other countries that are emerging – we’re not quite there. So what I’d love is for us all to just get ourselves to work.

TM: One last question: at what age did you decide ‘enough is enough, I don’t want to be a virgin anymore’?

NM: [Brief pause, breaks out laughing] TM: No, I’m joking! [laughs] Thank you very much for your time.

NM: [Still laughing] TM: Thanks Nandi. Have a good day.

NM: Bye-bye, Thenji. Enjoy yourself.

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Fighting crime

from the inside out While most of us complain about crime and leave it there, these superheroes are tackling the problem head-on. Delia du Toit meets up with a few people who go behind bars to make sure offenders don’t offend again.

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LOCAL HERO | CHAT

TEACHING FROM EXPERIENCE After being incarcerated herself in 1986 and losing her brother to violence in 1991, Sandy Hoffman decided to become a counsellor to inmates in correctional facilities. ‘I needed to find a way to channel my anger,’ she says, ‘and I needed to understand violence better in order not to feel like a victim.’

At first, it was challenging to find ways to get inmates to trust her, because without trust, she says, rehabilitation means nothing. ‘It became a process of

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mutual learning, providing growth and empowerment for clients and myself,’ Sandy says. ‘That is the measure of success for any therapy.’

Today, Sandy practices as a counselling psychologist in Cape Town, but continues to counsel parolees pro bono until they become employed – which they stay if they’re successfully counselled. ‘Each and every client who is committed to therapy for their own sake, rather than to gain a psychological report for the parole board, proves enormously successful,’ she explains. ‘One man, for example, had

21 convictions and had not spent more than one year out of prison since age 21.

After therapy, he learned that despite an accident and brain damage as an adolescent, he could actually say “no” and place boundaries. Since leaving prison in 2005, he has not been incarcerated again.’

Sandy finds the field fascinating and personally rewarding, and her work has been widely published. She believes crime is not just a person transgressing the law, but a societal problem. ‘We are all a part of antisocial behaviour,’ she says. ‘It is not a coincidence that the crime rate

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LOCAL HERO | CHAT

‘I WAS ADAMANT TO FIND A JOB AND MAKE UP FOR THE YEARS OF MY LIFE I’D MISSED’ – JONATHAN CLAYTON

SANDY HOFFMAN

increases dramatically in countries where there are vast differences between the highest and lowest socioeconomic groups, as is the case in South Africa. Central to violence and antisocial behaviour is a very intimate connection between shame and rage. This is core to all of us, but it is a part of the daily lives of people found guilty of crime.’

Offenders, she says, are mostly no different from the rest of us – despite the stigma surrounding incarceration.

‘We have all done things that are “wrong” in our own eyes and, in therapy, inmates often acknowledge that their

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JONATHAN AND JENNY CLAYTON

behaviour is unacceptable to society and themselves. But their behaviour is driven by unconscious needs and, without understanding these needs, they are unlikely to be able to stop. Facing those areas of one’s self that we try most to avoid, like shame, takes enormous courage – for them, and anyone else.’ sandyhoffman.co.za

ADMINISTERING HOPE Pastor Jonathan Clayton from Hope Prison Ministries in Cape Town spent three years behind bars himself, until 1991, and

kissed Pollsmoor Prison goodbye when he left. ‘Literally! On the day of my release, I stopped and kissed the gates goodbye,’ he says. ‘I never wanted to go back and was adamant to find a job and make up for the years of my life I’d missed.’

But life, it seems, had other plans. His then-friend Jenny, now his wife, used to visit him in prison, and they discussed the need to reach out to people behind bars. ‘Jenny saw young girls with babies visiting their fathers, husbands and boyfriends in prison, and wanted to help these people,’ Jonathan says.

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CHAT | LOCAL HERO

‘As an ordained minister, she started ministering to them. I wanted to help too, but couldn’t, because I had a record.’

It took a lot of pleading and hard work, but with volunteers from their church showing up to help minister to inmates in droves, Jonathan was eventually registered as an official spiritual worker with the correctional services in 1994 at the prison where he once did time.

He then enrolled to study theology, with a two-year counselling course. After graduation, he was given an office at Pollsmoor. ‘It became a passion for me,’ he says. ‘In the beginning I just wanted to preach to the inmates, but I realised this wasn’t helping them deal with their deeper issues. We needed to start equipping these people with life skills to truly give them a second chance.’

Today, 19 counsellors work at Hope Prison Ministries, and Jonathan has even developed a training course specifically for prison counsellors. ‘The more time you spend with someone, the more impact and change you see in them,’ he says. ‘It’s truly wonderful to see someone grow like that.’

Their Restorative Justice programme, where offenders are put into contact with their victims, has proven especially successful. Up to 50 offenders and victims complete this programme every year – with no negative feedback thus far. ‘Around 60% of offenders pleaded not guilty in court, further humiliating victims and their families through denial,’ Jonathan says.

‘We started victim-offender dialogues, where we tell the victim they have a right to confront the offender in order to find peace. After extensive counselling with both the victim and offender, we set up a secure meeting between them, with us as facilitators. Both parties find it to be a very therapeutic process.’

021 701 8061, jonathan@hopepm.org

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YOUTH EMPOWERMENT

LUNTU VUMAZONKE FROM YIPSA

‘THEY COME FROM COMMUNITIES WHERE THERE IS NO SUPPORT FOR THEM AND THEIR PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT’

LOYISA BOTHA FROM YIPSA

The patterns we learn early in life are often the hardest to break. This is why nonprofit organisation Young in Prison South Africa (YiPSA) teaches incarcerated youths in Cape Town and Jo’burg essential life skills through fun and engaging activities.

YiPSA marketing director Pearl Nel first got involved with the programme in 2009 through a corporate initiative, and decided to help the organisation in her free time from then on. ‘I was touched by the plight of these children,’ she says. ‘There is such a stigma that surrounds them, but it turns out that they often don’t have a choice in living a life of crime. Some of them actually don’t want to leave prison, because on the outside they were forced to be part of gangs, their families were victimised, and they didn’t have food or a bed.

‘All YiPSA participation is voluntary, which means that those who enrol in the programmes really want to change their lives – it’s inspiring.’

Clinton Osbourn, co-ordinator of YiPSA’s post-release programme, agrees. ‘Society believes that offenders are bad people,’ he says, ‘but most of the time they just haven’t had the same opportunities as other people. They come from communities where there is no support for them and their personal development, and often resort to drugs to cope, which just makes things worse.

By the time we start working with them, they have many unresolved issues that need to be worked through. One of the most important things we address is their low self-esteem. A healthy dose of self-confidence is essential to help them believe in their own potential.’

This is done through a unique methodology involving creative and performing arts, sports and literacy.

The programme helps them to deal

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‘THE WORKSHOPS GIVE THESE PEOPLE A PURPOSE IN LIFE, TEACH THEM NEW SKILLS AND GIVE THEM SOMETHING TO FEEL PROUD OF’ HEALING THROUGH ARTS

pictures: nagel photography/shutterstock.com, supplied

PROF ALEX SUTHERLAND, LUVUYO YANTA, PHEMELO HELLEMANN, THEMBELA MADLIKI AND CAROLYN STEVENSON-MILLN WORK ON VUKA

effectively with issues such as gang activity, drugs and crime. And it works.

Late last year, for example, one of the YiPSA participants was accepted at the University of the Western Cape to pursue a nursing qualification.

Videos on the YiPSA website also tell the story of youths who decided to make a change after being helped by the organisation – passing their matric and finding jobs as a result.

‘Our success is often difficult to measure, as personal growth is not quantifiable,’ explains Clinton. ‘But when we see an ex-offender find a job, improve their family relationships, and become motivated, we can feel proud of what we have achieved.’ younginprison.org.za

Creative expression has long been used as a form of therapy, but for those behind bars, it provides a much-needed escape from daily life.

Professor Alex Sutherland from Rhodes University’s drama department recognised this, and decided to bring the arts to those in need. After lengthy negotiations with the Department of Correctional Services, and under the helm of the National Arts Festival (NAF), she started performing arts-centred workshops in correctional facilities – to great acclaim.

Vuka workshops form part of the NAF’s Makana Arts Academy, and have produced numerous success stories. Around 20 men regularly take part in the workshops, held at the Grahamstown Correctional Facility. Some past participants have received awards from the Makana Drama Development Festival, as well as doublegold certificates from the Grahamstown Eisteddfod, and have participated in the Fingo Festival during the National Arts Festival in 2013 and 2014.

PRISON PETS Anecdotes of pets’ positive effect on inmates abound. At Oakwood Forensic Centre, a maximum-security prison for the criminally insane in Ohio, USA, these reports were put to the test when one ward was allowed to keep pets and another wasn’t. Within a year, prisoners in the pet ward were less violent and needed only half the medication of their peers – proving that caring for an animal has therapeutic effects.

These pet programmes haven’t taken off in South Africa yet, but organisations such as Paws in Prison and the Prison Pet Partnership are making great strides in the field in the USA – with other countries sure to follow. (Sources: Daily Mail, The Guardian)

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Carolyn Stevenson-Milln, a past judge of these productions and project manager for the NAF’s Creative City project, was amazed when she first saw what these men could achieve.

‘One of the productions I judged was in isiXhosa, which I don’t speak,’ she says.

‘But through their singing, dancing and gesturing, I got the entire message, which is a remarkable achievement.

‘I was also blown away by their enthusiasm and commitment. Not only did they put on an entire production using only props they could find in the facility, but they also inspired their fellow inmates, who all came to watch.

‘The workshops give these people a purpose in life, teach them new skills and give them something to feel proud of – all essential elements of their rehabilitation process. It’s amazing to see how their confidence is boosted by it.’

The Department of Correctional Services itself has put their stamp of approval on the NAF’s work with offenders. In 2013, a group of offenders showcased their talents at the Festival in a performance dubbed Art Behind Bars.

Former Minister of Correctional Services Sibusiso Ndebele said at the time: ‘As the Department of Correctional Services, we too will use music, poetry, arts and culture not only as rehabilitation tools, but also as weapons to destroy crime, lawlessness and drug abuse. We will use these programmes to send a message to offenders that you can make good use of your time while incarcerated.’

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Game

changers Thought Eat, Pray, Love was a cringeworthy sob story? Travel addict Keith Bain will have you dry heaving as he gets choked up over a handful of his favourite local destinations.

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LIFE-ALTERING ADVENTURES | TRAVEL

A

s a young boy, I’d stare at my globe of the world and fantasise about visiting every possible corner of it. I had no idea why, but in my imagination there lurked a fascination with everything faraway and different.

I wanted to meet people of every hue, creed, culture and language, to set eyes upon every species of animal, and to discover places that looked utterly unlike anywhere I’d ever been. I craved a life of exploration, and when you’re young, time is sufficiently infinite to make a full survey of one planet seem perfectly plausible.

My first major foray across the globe happened only after I’d graduated from university. It was a round-the-world trip that added three continents to my check list. My friends and I were young, dumb, and wide-eyed with curiosity. We devoted ourselves to seeing as many museums, art galleries and noteworthy landmarks as we could fit in. Admittedly, we also crammed in all the sleazy bars, red-light districts and kitsch theme parks we could stomach. It was glorious.

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Being away was all about making discoveries. Not just discovering new places, but finding parts of myself I’d never known existed. We did things I’d never have considered if I was safe and comfortable back home – dancing naked in the snow in Zermatt, sleeping in a London telephone booth to escape the cold (and save money), leaping off a bridge attached to rubber band in Queenstown.

If I’d known then what I know now, I’d have carried on travelling forever.

Who knew the rand would sink so low or that visas and overseas plane rides would become so expensive? Which is why it’s worth taking advantage of the life-changing experiences we have at our fingertips, right here, right now, at home.

JUMPING STRAIGHT INTO THE DEEP END I had just matriculated and friends invited me to Sodwana Bay in KwaZulu-Natal.

It’s a place I’ll always remember as jungly and wild, with hippos cruising through the lodge, and signposts warning us to stay on the raised wooden boardwalks at night. The beach was a short stroll away, and our time was spent chilling and eating and drinking. We were, of course, also there to scuba dive – something I’d never done and secretly feared as much as any unnatural act.

My friends gave me a few lessons in the pool and they convinced the skipper to let me dive despite zero experience. I was nervous and quietly petrified, but curiosity got the better of me, and I reminded myself that this might just be a once-ina-lifetime opportunity. Before long, I had squeezed myself into a wetsuit and was falling backwards off a boat, strapped to a tank filled with compressed air.

Within moments, I was staring in awe at a Technicolor world of marvellous fish

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I WAS STARING IN AWE AT A TECHNICOLOR WORLD OF MARVELLOUS FISH AND TURTLES AND MANTA RAYS and turtles and manta rays. I was in my element, gobsmacked by the abundance of life, any hints of nervousness forgotten.

When time was up, I managed to reach the surface without popping a blood vessel in my brain. As we started back towards the beach, I was overcome by the thrill of having achieved a bucketlist moment, and longed for the next day’s dive. Soon, though, we came upon another dive boat, stationary in the water.

All its divers were hopping into the water with snorkels and goggles. As though it were the most wonderful news in the world, their skipper said there were ragged-tooth sharks in the water.

‘Then why the hell are they getting into the water?’ chimed the voice in my head.

But the voice was alone in its opinion, and suddenly everyone on my boat was jumping in, too. I took a deep breath, wondered if my final moments were upon me, and followed them into the water.

Moments later, I was a changed man, floating in the middle of the ocean, ogling sharks as though it were the most natural thing in the world. And having conquered another deep-seated fear, I felt a little braver.

And heaps more thankful for being alive.

SALT OF THE EARTH I was born and raised next to the warm Indian Ocean, and have always felt happiest knowing that the sea and salty air are close by, when the waves crash and roar within audible distance and that smell of ocean spray tingles at the back of my nose.

So it makes my love of the Karoo counterintuitive. I adore spending time in utterly empty desert lands, places seemingly bereft of life, struggling to find a drop of water, where the sun beats down on the cracked, fragile earth, baking the rocks and forcing mortals to squint in the glare. There’s something about vast, desolate, empty spaces that satisfies parts of me I cannot explain.

I feel it whenever I visit small towns that thrive in the Great Karoo. They’re usually slightly offbeat places, where people have adapted to the harsh climate and rugged environment.

There are all those well-preserved churches, gardens spilling over rusted gates, and antique rocking chairs on shaded verandas. And the influence of globalisation is less apparent – remoteness fosters uniqueness.

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And because these communities are relatively small, people become natural innovators, finding ways to keep active and productive – not to mention coming up with ways to keep their towns attractive and marketable to the outside world. You see this in places such as Prince Albert, where there’s a culture of creativity and self-reliance that’s seductive enough to have caused many visitors to pack up their city lives and immediately relocate.

City dwellers frequently underestimate townsfolk, dismissing them as yokels or assuming they understand less of the world because they’re not immersed in the heaving, ceaseless rush of an urban buzz. But it takes guts and resilience to succeed and prosper, and sometimes just to survive, in a place where there’s far less mollycoddling and convenience.

More than the city bound, these townsfolk understand the relationship between the land and the food they put on their tables. There’s a closeness to the earth and a sense of being in touch with the world around them, and that’s something you can learn a lot from – the

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kind of learning that doesn’t happen online, and is definitely more rewarding than scrolling through a Facebook feed.

THE CALL OF HOME My first visit to Soweto was on a whim: a spare Saturday and a friend of a friend visiting from the UK. Bongani Ndlovu was our guide and driver, and we joined a minibus full of wide-eyed foreigners for a day of history, iconic streets, and much socialising in bustling shebeens.

Whether it was the familiarity of the heroes in the stories Bongani shared about the places we visited, or the warm welcomes we received wherever we went, or perhaps the fact that every beer arrived in a massive quart-sized bottle, I’ll never forget that sense of coming home. It was a wonderland populated with vibrant communities, a place where strangers greet one another and locals are genuinely curious about outsiders.

Sure, there were corrugated homes balanced precariously like rusted antiques alongside kitsch brickwork palaces in deafening colours, and power cables cluttered the sky like gigantic spider

threads between soaring pylons, but there was nothing glum or threatening about Africa’s largest ‘township’.

Years later, I was in Soweto again, this time on assignment and in a rented car with an outdated map book. It wasn’t long before I was driving on instinct, getting lost and discovering neighbourhoods that weren’t on the familiar tourist trail.

Jollers cruised and waved from their BMWs, minibuses blasted syncopated house through billion-watt amps, shipping containers served as roadside stalls, and everywhere entrepreneurs were doing business. In a few years, Soweto had definitely evolved, and there were more signs of prosperity, more places to shop, to eat and drink and party, and more homes for people to live under a solid roof.

But what hadn’t changed was the warmth of the welcome. At the Soweto Wine Festival – the most buzzing and vibrant wine event I’ve ever attended – I discussed Chardonnay with Madiba’s granddaughter, Tukwini Mandela.

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LIFE-ALTERING ADVENTURES | TRAVEL

pictures: keith bain, wieland gleich, south african tourism

THE TRANSKEI IS A TRUE TIMEWARP EXPERIENCE, WHERE PEOPLE MOSTLY WALK TO WHEREVER THEY’RE GOING

She explained that Sowetans are savvy, eager to expand their horizons.

More importantly, she also told me why: because of their past, Sowetans are tremendously resilient – they have survivor DNA, which makes them open, entrepreneurial, and natural innovators. Then she told me that as a child she’d been scared of the township, intimidated by the violence and aware of the many hardships associated with living in apartheid-era Soweto at a time of upheaval. ‘But it’s because of that history,’ she said, ‘that Soweto is the soul of the nation, a place to which South Africans are “called”.’ It’s a calling, I thought, worth answering.

WHERE HUMANITY RESIDES Among my most vivid and heartwarming memories from early childhood is of the scenes through the car window driving through the old Transkei.

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For me, the three-hour drive down the South Coast towards the invisible border that designated the divide between two worlds really was an adventure. I always felt my heart beating faster and harder the instant we crossed Mtamvuna River, suddenly finding ourselves in a presumably exotic land, where I’d stare at the lush, green scenery, watch cows loping across hills dotted with thatched rondawels, and gasp as we traversed winding roads clinging to the sides of vast gorges.

Best of all was the way tiny children would coming running, waving and smiling with all their might. It was pure human interaction, and I’d wave back with giddy enthusiasm. Our meanderings through the Transkei took us to raw, unpolished beaches, swathes of paradise wedged up against craggy cliffs, and rocky outcrops that haunt me to this day as reminders of the world at its most primordial and unspoiled.

We’d set upon landscapes that were wild in every sense, backed by jungle and ragged hills, with the sea alive and roaring with the fury of waves bashing the hell out of the rocks. It was a place where nature prevailed in a land magically unthreatened by overbearing human progress.

That was decades ago. Yet, despite the passing of years, with the mending of roads, reports of mining and the arrival of more holiday resorts, the Wild Coast has retained all its charm, right down to the ambling Nguni cattle (which sometimes force you to slow to a dawdle as you bounce along rough, donga-filled dirt roads).

It is a true time-warp experience, where people mostly walk to wherever they’re going, everyone has time for a chat, homes are made from mud bricks that are baked in the sun, and those ambling cows find their own way home at the end of the day, following paths they’ve been using for centuries.

Turn off the highway and bounce towards the coast and you’ll discover people who don’t speak English, entire villages without television, and old ladies who ply you with home-made beer as they curiously interrogate you for information about your marital status.

It’s still possible to walk the entire coastline, sleep under the stars or take shelter in village huts, occasionally dipping into the luxury of those old-school, familyrun hotels with priceless views.

Its wildness and splendour are legendary, but what makes the Wild Coast really special is that it changes who you are, providing the space and opportunity just to be. And when you drive along it’s wonky, potholed dirt roads to places that seem like the ends of the earth, you discover that it’s not just the children who wave. Here the grown-ups have time for you, too.

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BEHIND THE SCENES | ACTION

HARLAND SANDERS

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t’s easy to take things for granted that have apparently been ever present in our lives. Food feeds memory and connects people, and as much as many give no thought to the presence of their favourite restaurant or takeaway in the mall’s food court, generations of South Africans will have powerful memories of a special takeaway treat on a Friday night from KFC, or childhood birthdays celebrated at the local Spur. These franchises are part of many family histories – but they also have histories of their own.

A CHICKEN IN EVERY POT

Chain reaction

Trevor Crighton looks into the histories of our favourite franchises.

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Aged just six and the eldest in his family, Harland Sanders’ mother took him into the kitchen in their Corbin, Kentucky, home to help prepare meals for the family. He quickly mastered the Southern staples, and it whet his appetite for producing great food and feeding others.

Aged 40, he bought a service station to help support his family, and decided to put his love of cooking to use by serving hungry travellers who stopped by. Word of his delicious Southern-style cooking spread, and people came from far and wide to taste it – particularly his delicious ‘Kentucky Fried Chicken’. Before long, he owned a 142-seater café, which was doing so well that the governor made him a ‘Kentucky Colonel’ in recognition of his outstanding achievement in the community, and for his mouthwatering contribution to the state’s cuisine.

He perfected his blend of 11 herbs and spices in 1939, which earned his restaurant a spot in a famous US restaurant guide, and business really took off. He spent decades travelling the US and sharing his award-winning chicken – but never the secret recipe – with restaurant owners. At the age of 74, he opened his 600th franchise in the US,

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BEHIND THE SCENES | ACTION

ALLEN AMBOR

before selling off the business to a group of investors for $2-million – a substantial return on the $105 social-security cheque that started it all. A condition of the sale was that he’d stay involved to maintain the standard – something he continued to do on a global scale as he travelled the world, right up until he was diagnosed with leukaemia in 1980.

The first KFC store opened in Orange Grove in Jo’burg in 1971, and after 40 years, there are more than 800 stores across the country. Local parent company Yum Restaurants has also taken the brand into the rest of the continent, with more than 200 restaurants serving the colonel’s chicken in 16 countries.

WINNING HIS SPURS Allen Ambor started working at a restaurant in Jo’burg to put himself through university. The bug bit and he knew that one day he’d own a restaurant of his own. He moved to Cape Town and started looking for premises. After an exhaustive search and what felt like ages spent pioneering a concept, developing proprietary sauces and custom décor, he found the perfect spot in Newlands in 1967, and opened the Golden Spur.

At the time there was a gap in the local restaurant market for a value-for-money, casual and informal offering that also

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NEARLY 50 YEARS ON, THERE ARE 284 SPUR RESTAURANTS ACROSS SOUTH AFRICA openly welcomed children. This became the perfect breeding ground for the Golden Spur to thrive. Nearly 50 years on, there are 284 Spur restaurants across South Africa, and 62 more in places such as Mauritius, Namibia, the UK and Australia.

Spur Corporation Marketing Manager Etienne Ralphs says the brand has evolved over the past five decades to keep up with the times, but has still retained the elements that made the first restaurant such a roaring success.

‘Embracing change through continual evolution allows us to maintain and improve upon customer favourites, while introducing new concepts and phasing out others,’ he says. ‘Some of the more unique and interactive menu items such as the Salad Valley and Hot Rock Steaks have made way for improved items over the years. We’ve put more focus on kids over the years, and our Play Canyons are

industry leaders in terms of safe, fun and engaging activities for the little ones.’

With such a reputation to uphold, new franchise applications are carefully assessed. ‘The primary aspect of a good restaurant is an ambitious, entrepreneurially minded, committed and energetic franchisee who works in their business daily,’ says Etienne. ‘Items such as training are managed by the franchisor and form one of the many parts of setting up a new business; it is vital that all staff understand exactly what is expected of them and have the ability to deliver this consistently to our customers.’

Spur’s evolution continues with an eye on providing new memories for future generations of customers. The latest step was the launch of the first Spur Grill & Go in December last year – a fast, casual restaurant positioned in the transient market.

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ACTION | BEHIND THE SCENES

INSPIRED BY… The name Natasha Sideris probably won’t ring many bells, but if you offer someone her nickname, millions of South Africans will know who you’re talking about. The story of tashas restaurants begins at 101 Market Street in Jo’burg, where her father Harry ran The Town Tavern Steakhouse. There she got her start in the family business, before working alongside her father at their Fishmonger restaurant.

In 2005, Natasha realised her dream of owning her own restaurant when

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she opened tashas in Atholl Square in northern Jo’burg. ‘I set out to transform the daytime eating experience in South Africa,’ she explains, ‘and create an environment where food and conversation went hand in hand.’ Her vision caught the city’s attention and business boomed. What started as one restaurant a decade ago has now become 14 – including one in Dubai.

Each tashas restaurant is unique in terms of décor and menu, and even though some staple items remain in

the ‘Classic’ menu, even that evolves.

‘When I opened the second store in Bedfordview, I realised I didn’t want to create a “cookie-cutter” experience,’ says Natasha. ‘Each tashas has its own inspiration based on its location; it influences both the design of the store as well as the “Inspired By… ” menu.’

Demand has also seen many of the stores remaining open throughout the evening – something Natasha originally didn’t foresee when she started out.

‘The most difficult challenge in opening the first restaurant was being able to find the money to get it off the ground,’ Natasha recalls, ‘whereas the most difficult thing about franchising is finding the right partners – people who share your values, beliefs and vision for what tashas is.

‘We have a small head-office team that works hand in hand with the franchisees from well before the doors of their new store open and on a day-to-day basis, making sure they are given all of the assistance and guidance that they need to ensure the tashas way is retained and the experience is consistently good.’

pictures: supplied, david ross

IS AND NATASHA SIDER HARRY SIDERIS

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DRIVE | ACTION

Tanked up It’s big, it’s bold and it’s one of the best off-roaders in the world. David Taylor falls in love with the Mercedes-Benz G-Class.

pictures: supplied

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he story behind the MercedesBenz G-Class is an interesting one. ‘Make an unbeatable off-roader,’ they said. ‘Oh, and it has to be comfortable enough to drive on the road, and we’d like to be able to sell it commercially for use in armies and police services globally.’ Now that’s a brief I’d never like to hear. Fact is, the MercedesBenz G-Class is one helluva machine.

The design may not have changed much since the 1970s, when the first G-Class rolled off the production line, but why is this offering better and more expensive than a normal MercedesBenz SUV, you ask? For starters, the G-Class is entirely hand built, and the production facilities in Austria cater

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for both civilian and military versions.

Knowing your vehicle is built by the same guys who build Merc tanks is quite reassuring. Then there are the engines. South Africans will be getting the sensible and practical 350d, a V6 diesel engine, and we’ll also be receiving the mighty bi-turbo AMG V8-powered G63.

I opted to drive the G350d, as it’s more sensible and cheaper than its fire-breathing cousin. With a ground clearance of 235mm, wading depth of 600mm and a gradient-climbing ability of 100%, it’s properly badass off-road.

Most bakkie owners brag that they have a difflock to help them out. That’s cute, but the G350d has three difflocks.

Its rugged exterior and abilities make you think you’re driving a tank and, in a way, you are. Once inside, however, you’ll be impressed with the comfort, refinement and luxury features. There’s cruise control, satellite navigation and heated seats. Opt for the Professional G300 and you’ll have the ability to take a hosepipe to the interior to clean it, without running the risk of damaging anything.

The Mercedes-Benz G-Class is a special vehicle that can go anywhere, and it makes most other off-roaders look like toys in comparison. The go-anywhere ability and handcrafted origins come at a price, though. At R1.4-million, it’s not cheap, but if you want to make your own roads, then this is the best way to do it.

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ACTION | DRIVE

Fancy a vehicle that can survive anything? Here are some of the toughest four-wheeled beasts.

With legendary reliability, a go-anywhere attitude and some monster off-road ability, the Toyota Land Cruiser 200 has a fearsome reputation, and is as at home crossing crocodile-infested rivers as it is mounting a Sandton pavement. From R850 000.

TOYOTA HILUX

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Five indestructible cars

TOYOTA LAND CRUISER 200

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LAND ROVER DEFENDER

The Land Rover Defender has been around since the Second World War, and has a reputation for being rather tough, and dead simple to repair. There are precious few electronics and the vehicle is designed to last. Sadly, production has come to an end, but an extensive search of the classifieds should result in a good find.

From R520 800.

The Toyota Hilux is one of those bakkies that just carries on and on. It’s reliable and can take some hardcore punishment. Don’t believe me? TopGear UK tried to destroy one and it still continued to start, despite being driven into the sea and dropped off a building. From R315 100.

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RENAULT DUSTER

Don’t be fooled by its Renault badge: the Duster is rather tough when it comes to the rough stuff. It offers a four-wheel drive pinched from a Nissan and, much like the Suzuki Jimny, punches above its weight. Opt for the 1.5-litre diesel for maximum effect. If you doubt its abilities, remember that some Renault Dusters took part in the iconic, gruelling Dakar off-road race. From R194 900.

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SUZUKI JIMNY

Don’t let the size deceive you – the Suzuki Jimny is one of the most capable little off-roaders ever. It has great ground clearance and a low-range gearbox, making it rather handy when the tarmac disappears. From R229 900.

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PROPERTY | STUFF

Play it again , Sam

Like the old movie classics, timeless design never goes out of fashion, says Kerry Hayes Hayes.

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rends come and go: we wait in anticipation for the next colour of the year (incidentally, blue is going to be big this year, with touches of rose quartz and gold), the next furniture design trend, be it retro or Scandi, or the next interior-design style, such as minimalism.

But timeless design lasts forever – it never looks dated, and is always elegant, quietly understated, sophisticated and simple.

WHAT MAKES DESIGN TIMELESS? There are a few key factors in design that make it timeless: • It’s simple. Timeless design has a definite less-is-more approach, with simple, clean lines and open floor plans.

The style is functional and practical.

• It has classical proportions. The ancient Greeks coined a design approach called the Golden Ratio – a layout that is visually pleasing with comfortable proportions.

• It’s durable. To be timeless, design

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must be durable, which includes beautiful, quality materials and furniture pieces that last for decades or even centuries. True antique furniture is an absolute gem when putting together a timeless look.

• It’s adaptable. The trick with timeless design is to retain the original intent of the design – the grounding elements, if you will – while being able to update it with smaller pieces and accessories.

nor too small, and it should ‘belong’ in the room. You can go classic with antiques or modern, but stay away from ‘trendy’ pieces that are hot stuff now, but lose their appeal after a few months or years. Or you can combine the two styles – try a beautiful antique armchair beneath a modern artwork.

WORK FROM THE OUTSIDE IN Creating a timeless look and feel in a room starts with its shell. Create a dependable and solid backdrop with a neutral room colour, from whites and beiges to soft greys. When selecting furniture to fit into the shell, remember your proportions: the furniture should fit the room perfectly, being neither too big

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STUFF | PROPERTY

GOING FOR GOLD

USE NATURAL RESOURCES Natural materials such as wood, stone and fibres never go out of fashion, which is why they keep recurring as a trend. Wooden floors look so elegant in a home, and a piece of good-quality wooden furniture in a simple design cannot be beaten for its timeless appeal.

Simple fabrics such as sturdy cotton are marvellous for a durable look, and a marble fireplace is undeniably sophisticated.

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A TOUCH OF TREND Just because you’re going for the timeless look doesn’t mean you have to starve yourself of the latest trends.

Just enjoy them in small quantities.

Add accessories such as ombre vases or scatter cushions in the colour of the year, or a touch of metallic through a beautiful candelabrum. Your simple neutral backdrop is very forgiving when it comes to funky accessories, and these don’t break the bank when you feel like a change from masala to serenity blue.

The timeless look isn’t difficult to achieve. Just remember the KISS principle (seeing as it is Valentine’s month): Keep It Simple and Sophisticated.

Be reserved in your backdrop and grounding elements, then let your hair down and have fun with accessories.

For more home and décor inspiration, visit sahomeowner.co.za.

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pictures: supplied

The furnishings should also ‘fit’ with the architectural design of the room.

The interplay between the room and its interior should be like a beautiful dance: each piece, like each step, fitting together perfectly, like they belong to each other.

The most important thing to remember is that all the grounding elements in the room need to be functional and sensible – they should have a purpose, and not just be chosen to look pretty. This gives the room longevity and endurance.

The Golden Ratio – also known as the Divine Ratio, Golden Section or the Greek letter phi – is a common mathematical ratio found in nature that, upon presentation, is pleasing and comfortable to the eye. It is one of the most profound tools in a designer’s toolkit, and influences the design of a building, home or room, and the layout of its interior.

For the mathematicians, the ratio can be expressed as the equation ab = a + ba = 1.618033987 or explained through the Fibonacci sequence, which begins with 1 (some say 0), and adds up the previous number to give the next (i.e. 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, 8, 13, 21…).

Simply put, in an example given by freshome.com, when looking at placing furniture pieces in a room, ‘start by visually dividing up the space into two sections – a larger one that takes up two-thirds of the space and houses the furniture that defines the main use for the room, and the final third, which accounts for a secondary function like a separate seating area or storage. Choose pieces that are sized close to that 2:3 measurement. Aim for a couch that is approximately 2:3 the length of the seating area as a whole, and a coffee table that is close to 2:3 the length of the couch’.

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MONEY MATTERS | STUFF

Forever financially sound What are the secrets of financially savvy people? Katherine Graham says once you know how it's done, you too can make money work for you – and not the other way around.

DECONSTRUCT MONEY MYTHS Begin with your head, not your wallet.

Alison Sparg, who runs Financial Focus training courses, says you should identify statements about money that you perceive to be true. For example, ‘Money doesn’t grow on trees’ may sound right, but it also implies that money is a finite resource and that there is never enough of it. Pin down your own money myths, unpack them and then write a counter-statement that reflects a more positive attitude towards your finances.

picture: istock

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR FINANCES (EVEN IF YOU'RE AN ENTREPRENEUR) The basics of looking after your money are simply knowing how much goes into and out of your bank account every month – think budget and tracking your expenses. This is easier to do if you have a fixed income every month. It is harder, but just as important, if you're selfemployed or run your own business.

Emma Wiese, brand developer and owner of Fresh Sage, says one of the biggest struggles for entrepreneurs is that the client is in control of their finances. 'By either waiting for clients to pay (usually long-) overdue bills, they feel held ransom by the situation they find themselves in,' she says. 'Instead of wasting copious amounts of energy following up on invoices, it makes more sense to put

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systems in place to take back control of your finances – such as having a virtual assistant or an app to generate invoices.'

GET INTO THE HABIT OF SAVING Wealth coach Christo van Zyl says saving is the real first step to financial freedom.

Apply the principle of paying yourself first – put aside money for investments early in the month before debit orders start chomping away at your salary.

If your investments grow at a faster rate than inflation, you'll have interest working for you, and not against you.

Not only should you be saving for the long term, but also in case of emergencies.

Having a buffer fund of at least three times your monthly income will spare you much pain when the geyser bursts or your car engine dies. And it's absolutely essential if you're self-employed to keep you going during the lean months.

GIVE MONEY AWAY 'All wealthy people give money away,' says Christo. 'They give to church, to charity and to those who really need it. Giving is such a big part of receiving.' He recommends you give away some your time, some of your skills and some of your money, and then watch how much more comes your way.

BE THANKFUL A final thought: be thankful for what you have. You may feel resentful when you have to settle an invoice, but someone has rendered you a service or given you a product. It’s a fair exchange, so keep gratitude in mind when you pay them.

Make a list of five things you are thankful for in your life (not necessarily material things – it could be your health, your spouse or your family). When you get impatient with your financial situation, remind yourself of what you have to be grateful for. And remember your mother’s injunction: ‘Count your blessings.’

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STUFF | BUSINESS

To do or not to do?

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he internet is full of very positive people – sometimes even too positive. These people will never miss an opportunity to share a pithy motivational quote with you. I understand the intent, however, in truth I can't always say I'm particularly moved. Not because I'm an internet grinch, but more because one person’s positive sentiment simply isn't always that relevant.

Let me give you an example. Confucius said: ‘Man who walk backwards through revolving door is going to…’ (thanks, I'll be here all week). No, what Confucius is actually supposed to have said is this: ‘If you do what you love, you'll never work a day in your life.’

Pffft! I'm calling BS on this one. If I did what I loved for a living, I'd be a motorcycle delivery guy (I really love my motorbike).

I guess it's a nice idea, really, but it's just not that practical.

Throughout my career I’ve met many people, doing many different

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jobs, and I can safely tell you that 99.9% of them are not doing what they would have been doing when they were in high school.

Very few people wake up in the morning and say, ‘If only I were an audit clerk – that’d be a barrel of laughs.’

So the bad news is that the quote is largely irrelevant. The good news is that a whole heap of the people I meet on a dayto-day basis actually enjoy what they do for a living.

I think the key here is not to do what you love, but rather to learn to love what

love

you do – or more importantly, why you do it. Let me give you as example. For the past 18 years I've owned and run Missing Link, a presentation consultancy. Do you think I just woke up one day and said, ‘Man, I really love me some PowerPoint slides, I should totes start a company that makes ’em.’? If you do, you'd be wrong.

I didn't start the company because I loved presentations – I started it because I hated how bad they could be.

In my experience, if I did ride motorbikes for a living, it would soon feel less like a passion, and more like a chore. However, 18 years on, I'm still driven by the same desire to end terrible presentations. Why? Because I love the end result of a preso that rocks.

Watching a client hit it out the park is deeply satisfying.

Fixing a problem will always be more satisfying to me than simply doing what I love, because it's a challenge, and it's life's wee challenges that make this whole gig worthwhile.

Sorry Confucius, stick to Bangkok jokes, buddy.

picture: freepix

Lots of us hate what we do for a living, says Richard Mulholland of Missing Link.

The realistic solution: learn to love what you do and not do what you love.

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STUFF | HEALTH

Forever young There’s no fountain of youth, not even in Okinawa, but there are sure-fire ways to keep ageing at bay.

Omega-3 fatty acids are your friends. Include healthy quantities of fresh tuna, salmon, oysters, peanut butter, spinach, parsley, walnuts and

OHM seeds in your diet, as they help to prevent visible signs of ageing.

Did you know?

Omega-3s also boost the ability of your enzymes to pull fat out of storage and use it as energy.

Yoga is widely accepted as one of the best activities to reduce stress, one of the key contributors to ageing. Try some yoga poses and breathing techniques to calm down.

Did you know? Yogic (yes, that’s a word) breathing has been shown to oxygenate the cells, ridding them of toxins, and it helps to prevent illness and make skin radiant.

S FUN FACT STAY COVERED The harsh rays of the sun can cause photo-ageing of the skin, which is characterised by wrinkles, spotting and loss of elasticity. To protect yourself, simply stay out of the sun or use a good broad-spectrum, titanium-dioxide-based sunblock.

Did you know? The most important preventative measures you can take against the sun are to build up your antioxidant levels and to maintain adequate levels of vitamins A, C, D and E.

R FRUITS

2016 SUPE

Pomegranates and goji berries are your super fruits. Pomegranate juice lowers cholesterol and blood pressure, and potentially helps reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer’s. Goji berries contain more iron than spinach, 18 amino acids, calcium, magnesium, zinc, selenium, and vitamins B1, B2, B6 and E. Did you know? Goji berries improve your ability to sleep, help you look younger, reduce fat, improve memory, boost libido, and enhance the immune system.

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The oldest people in the world live in Okinawa. What are they doing to increase their life span? Well, they stop eating when they’re 80% full.

Oprah’s go-to doc, Mehmet Oz, says that women who enjoy sex live longer.

SLEEP IT AWAY

While you sleep, your body repairs damage done in the day, and prepares itself for your next bout of activity. Not getting enough sleep can lead to chronic adult-onset illnesses that can shorten your life span. Try to get at least seven-and-a-half hours of sleep a day.

Did you know? Without good-quality sleep, your metabolism will slow to a crawl. Lack of sleep can also increase the storage of deadly visceral fat around your organs.

text: raina julies; pictures: puuka/shutterstock.com, valery/shutterstock.com, alessio cola/shutterstock.com, mara ze/shutterstock.com, wenani/shutterstock.com, nina m/shutterstock.com, andrei rybachuk/shutterstock.com, wavebreakmedia/shutterstock.com, freepik

O-SO-GOOD FATS

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STUFF | COLUMN

Happily (for)ever after?

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o one day I got married. At 21 years of age, I did it in front of a group of people who stood witness to this formal, legal and religious ceremony. I had followed the rules of the day. Society, the media and my family had told me that when I found ‘The One’, I would date him exclusively, fall in love, get married, live together, share the same bed, have some kids and live happily ever after. Forever.

Standing at that altar, I seriously believed neither of us would look for love elsewhere. We both vowed to this concept of monogamy. We then swore commitment, dedicating ourselves to ‘The One’ … forever. Implicit was the vow of sexual fidelity – enshrining one’s genitals exclusively to ‘The One’ … forever.

Until he had an affair and my idea of ‘forever’ was shattered. Did you know that 34% of marriages are expected to end in divorce by the 20th anniversary, and overall 42% of marriages eventually end in divorce? Infidelity is a favoured way for individuals to flap their wings against the system of marriage, which can feel claustrophobic and nihilistic.

Personally, I think there are way better ways than infidelity to let a partner know: ‘Hey hun, I’m suffering in this forever place called marriage.

Let’s reconsider some rules.’

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FEBRUARY 2016

As a couple and sex therapist, I have seen the experience of marriage change drastically over the years, and never so much as with the technology boom. Once the internet became available to most people, the party was on. It’s called the triple-A engine: getting online is affordable, accessible, anonymous. From your mobile device you can be cyber-chatting to a stranger within seconds. Very rapidly, cyber-flirting creeps in and before you’ve landed at your destination, you’ve begun sexting your fantasies. In fact, as you read this you may well be flying to meet a lover.

My research into cyber infidelity (Cyber Infidelity: The New Seduction, Human & Rousseau, 2015) taught me that happily married men and women are finding increased self-esteem, sexual

experimentation and emotional connection online. People committing cyber infidelity don’t necessarily have unhappy marriages, nor do they want to leave their partners. They just want to rewrite their marital rules.

Here are some new rules of relationships that are emerging: • Marriage is a choice and it does not mean it has to last forever. When it is destructive and hurtful, it is best to leave, after therapy has happened.

• Hook-ups, friends with benefits, casual sex are acceptable forms of relating.

• Sexless/asexual marriages are a choice both people may make.

• Companionate marriage is more than good enough.

• Singlehood is as valuable as partnership.

• Open relationships are commonly being consensually explored.

• Polyamory (loving more than one person at a time) is ethical non-monogamy • Love and respect, rather than entitlement, are the cornerstones of relationships.

Infidelity hurts – avoid it through expanding your rules of relationships. I wish you integrity, honesty and flexibility in your attachments to others … forever.

Marlene Wasserman, aka Dr Eve, is a clinical sexologist, and a couple and sex therapist, specialising in cyber infidelity.

picture: freepik

Marlene Wasserman, aka Dr Eve, examines the ideas of love and marriage in the 21st century.

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