Parenting Pearls Summer is Here and It’s Time to Prepare For Camp

By Rabbi Dr. Dovid Fox

When the city gets hot and humid and yeshiva has wound to a halt for the summer, many young people and children look forward to the camp experience. We are blessed with exceptional summer camps with an atmosphere emphasizing the wholesome religious values and ideals which many families aim for at home, and when the program includes fun activities, socializing and learning experiences, camp can be a fine adjunct to supporting our children’s growth and development.

Each summer season, the Chai Lifeline offices and crisis line are busy responding to questions coming from parents as well as camp staff and directors. This article is a sketch of some of those concerns, as a proactive model for addressing your child’s needs should they arise.

Anxiety or “Homesick” Campers

not well or is not available. That can be remedied through staying in touch at an appropriate level and frequency.

2. Designate a familiar older friend, relative or staff member who will be your child’s go-to in case of need.

3. Express your love and encouragement prior to departure for camp while also being clear that you are excited that they will have an away-from-home fun time. Avoid giving the child mixed messages that might imply that you are not ready for them to be away.

4. Emphasize the value of treating others with respect, including teachers, camp rabbis and other adults who deserve courtesy and obedience from campers just as do their rebbeim and teachers in the city. Camp is a place for continuing our behavioral and personal standards, not for acting out and reckless misconduct. Clarify this with your camper.

Maturity: How

do

I

know if my child will do well away from home?

1. Explore this with your child in advance. Does he or she feel capable of living in a bunk with others and adhering to a rigorous camp schedule? Does your child socialize well and form friendships easily?

2. Outline with your child their responsibilities, their expectations, and yours, of being at camp, and help them determine if they are ready for some degree of independence. This includes pep talks about physical hygiene, responsible eating, risk avoidance, and protecting their possessions.

3. Discuss with your child the circumstances under which they might miss home or family and how they will address those feelings from far away.

1 . Explore with your child any worries or fears which they might share.

2. Determine if it is prudent to acquaint camp staff with any concerns which might surface at camp.

3. If your child or your family has experienced recent stresses or crisis situations, might this be affecting your child and should this be discussed in advance with camp staff?

4. Discuss with your child prior situations when they have been away from home and family and identify what has made these experiences positive during those times.

Safety at Camp

1. Discuss with your child the importance of boundaries, respecting other’s personal boundaries, and avoiding situations which might feel uncomfortable.

2. Many Jewish camps have undergone training of staff so that the safety and welfare of all campers will be monitored and adhered to responsibly. Reassure your child that they can contact you if they have any questions and can approach a responsible adult if they are uneasy.

3. Review with your child the family’s values and standards and ensure that they will at all times conduct themselves with others according to the same standards of modesty and honesty that is modeled at home.

Communication

1. When camps have the facilities to allow occasional phone calls to check in with parents i.e., before Shabbos, accommodate your child’s wish for contact and reassurance that all is well. At times, a child’s anxiety away from home is a result of worry that the family is

5. A word about bullying and about learning to accept new children whom one might not yet know should be communicated in advance.

The typical camp schedule is quite structured, including set wake up times, bedtimes, mealtimes, activities and outings, prayers, and educational programs. Adhering to the camp schedule can be very grounding and stabilizing for a child. Go over the program with your camper in advance and help them look forward to the experience.

Wishing you and them a summer of happiness, free of mishap and full of enjoyment within a Torah atmosphere.