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Around the COMMUNITY Bnos Bais Yaakov’s 21st Annual Dinner – A Garden Full of Success

OBAMA TAKES ON ISIS

37

Celebrating Excellence in Chinuch at Torah Academy for Girls’ Annual Dinner 47 Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam Celebrates its Third Annual Dinner

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JCCRP Awarded Borough Excellence Award for Queens

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THOUGHTS ON PURIM, PURIM RECIPES, HALACHA, & SIDE-SPLITTING HUMOR

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From the Editor

Contents Letters to the Editor

8

Community Readers’ Poll

8

Community Happenings

37

Op-Ed: Why I am Going to Copenhagen by Rabbi Gedaliah Oppen

71

News Global

10

National

24

Odd-but-True Stories

32

Israel Israel News

17

Parsha Rabbi Wein on the Parsha

72

The Shmuz

73

Giving Expression to the Mission by Rabbi Naphtali Hoff

74

Simchas Purim Esther’s Hidden Strength by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller 79 Turn Purim on its Heart by Rabbi Jonathan Gewirtz

83

Purim Certified Community News

87

The Very Accurate History of Far Rockaway and the Five Towns by Avi Heiligman 95 ECandy! A Field Guide by Mordechai Schmutter

108

Halacha Halachically Speaking: Mishloach Manos

84

Dear Readers, Although the elections are a year away, the presidential contenders are busy wooing potential voters—and donors. Recently, there’s been a flurry of activity as buses with stickers hailing the next president of the United States have been rolling down Central Avenue. In fact, there has been so much going on that the meter maids have put on roller sakates and were seen pirouetting from expired meter to expired meter with their ever-present notepad in hand. The newest meter maid (or servant) is a name we’re all familiar with—Brian Williams. Although he’s made headlines pretty recently, many have wondered where he would lay down his hat next after his TV career fizzled. After all, his life has been so busy—winning wars, fighting off attackers, even at one point winning an Olympic gold medal—that it’s almost impossible to rival that excitement.

But he’s found it—on Central Avenue plastering tickets on Honda Odysseys and LS 460s.

Back to the buses plaguing our streets. Those vying for a seat in the

White House in 2016 know that the Five Towns is the place to be if you want to reach informed voters and fistfuls of campaign cash. It seems that every restaurant is filled with their people scouting tables. In fact, I went into Traditions this week and was greeted by every Bush imaginable— except Barbara who stayed at home to read and darn her husband’s colorful socks. Buying ice cream, I bumped into Sarah Palin who couldn’t stop raving about the amazing weather we’ve been having and asking if I know Tina Fey since I live in New York. And Chris Christie thought I didn’t notice that he was sneaking fried onions from Hapina’s salad bar when I went in this week, but it was pretty obvious.

When news this big hits the Five Towns you can be certain that our reporters are on the ground making sure that every quote, secret meeting, and appetizer doesn’t go unnoticed. Be sure to read our in-depth report this week on this breaking piece of news.

Of course, there are so many other things happening this week. President Obama has finally vowed to take on

ISIS. As you know from the Purim story, it’s the woman that makes the man and in the White House it’s no different. Michelle My Belle was the impetus for Obama pledging to lick the evil empire. She pointed out the dangers to children and to people all over and for that we can be grateful.

For those of you thinking that Purim this year is going to be warm, make sure to heed Mayor de Blasio’s dire predictions of a Purim snowstorm.

So leave your graggers at home and take your snow shovels to shul because Hizzoner is always right when it comes to the weather—and many other things.

Speaking of Purim, we’d love to hear about yours—and a picture is worth a thousand words. So send us your photos of Purim 2015 for our TJH Purim Photo Album, although we may not be able to recognize you with your great disguise. Think you can guess what I am dressing up as? Email your Purim photos to Editor@FiveTownsJewishHome.com.

Wishing you a freilechen Purim, Shoshana

Weekly Weather

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Parenting Parenting Pearls by Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW 118 Health & Fitness

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Celebrate Purim Safely by Talia Zimmerman 86 V’Nehafo-Achoo! Dr. Simai Tickles Your Funny Bone by David Elazar Simai, MD 98 An Ode to Purim by Aliza Beer, RD MS

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Family Cutoffs by Deb Hirschhorn, PhD

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Food & Leisure Celebrating the Purim Miracle with a Meal of Minis

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Parshas Tetzaveh Candle Lighting: 5:25 Shabbos Ends: 6:26 Rabbeinu Tam: 6:57

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Letters to the Editor Dear Editor, Last week, you highlighted the Battle of Iwo Jima. A few years ago I read a book about the raising of the flag on Iwo Jima after the battle was won. What is interesting about the flag-raising is twofold: one, it was actually the second time the flag was raised and was essentially a photo-op; and two, the soldiers raising the flag, although they looked so united, ended up leading disparate lives.

When I was reminded of Iwo Jima once again, I thought about that famous photo. Looking at the image, you imagine a time of strength and bravery and victory. But knowing about what came afterwards can make one feel sad and dejected. It’s the same thing with many things in life: we can look at things one way and feel buoyed; if we see something in another light, we can feel dejected.

The Purim story happened in a twisted version of this. The Jews were depressed; they couldn’t see a way they could possibly survive Haman’s terrible decree. But then, miraculously, they were saved. At the beginning of the megillah they were looking at extermination. As the megillah closes, they are exulted and relieved.

May we continue to always see Hashem’s salvation and Hand so clearly!

Ruchama Teichman Dear Editor, This year, the OU is asking people to take their Purim Pledge in an effort to keep drinking on Purim safe and enjoyable. I couldn’t agree more. There is way too much alcohol being served to minors on Purim. No one oversees what they are drinking—and they drink myri-

Views expressed on the Letters to the Editor page do not necessarily reflect the views of The Jewish Home.

Please send all correspondence to editor@fivetownsjewishhome.com.

HAS A REAL DEAL FOR MISHLOACH MANOS

ad drinks as they march from one house to the next—mixing liquors, scotches and wines and drinking to excess. My cousin ended one Purim in the hospital with his mother weeping and praying for him not to lose his life because of alcohol poisoning. It was a jarring experience, one I will remember for many years to come.

Remember that these boys could be your children. Would you serve your son bottles and bottles of alcohol and then let him run amok for all hours? We are responsible for every child in our community—when something happens to one we are all affected. Please, do not serve alcohol to minors and please limit drinking in your house so we can have an enjoyable Purim and be able to celebrate the miracles of today and yesterday safely. When you send your child out on Purim, make sure they know the dangers of drinking and check in on him periodically. And of course—this goes without saying—make sure there is a designated driver always to drive them around if they are old enough and mature enough to be drinking.

For those of you wishing to take the Pledge, you can find it on the OU’s website, https://www.ou.org/life/holidays/ take-purim-pledge/. In the Pledge, you state that you will not serve alcohol to minors; you will not drink and drive or serve drinks to those who are driving; and you will not serve alcohol to any intoxicated guests.

Wishing us all a freilechen, wonderful, safe Purim!

Sharon Moskowitz

Dear Editor, The weather this winter has been difficult, but it is no excuse for the many local homeowners who do not shovel the sidewalks. While most of us jump into the car for our every venture, some people still walk, with many more on Shabbos. It is the homeowner’s responsibility to clear the walk within hours after the snowfall ends and if one resides at a corner, all sides must be shoveled.

(NYC usually gives tickets for those who do not, but somehow the officers have not made it to the outer boroughs this winter.)

If one is away or physically unable to shovel the walk, then one is responsible to hire someone to do so. The court case that can come if someone falls on an icy sidewalk will cost much more than hiring someone to shovel. Please be responsible before someone chas v’shalom is hurt.

Lynne Gordon

Send us your Purim photos! Be included in the TJH Purim photo album!

Email Editor@ FiveTownsJewishHome.com

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The Week In News

Global Her Honor, the Mayor

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For the first time, a woman has assumed the role of the mayor of Baghdad. Zekra Alwach, a civil engineer and director general of the ministry of higher education, becomes the first female to be given such a post in Iraq. International rights groups have condemned women’s rights abuses in the country for a long time and some are seeing this as step forward. The mayor is the most important administrative position in the

capital. Alwach will now deal directly with Prime Minister Haider al-Abadi and has the same power as a cabinet minister.

“Abadi sacked the [former] mayor Naim Aboub and named Dr. Zekra Alwach to replace him,” government spokesman Rafed Juburi said. Aboub’s removal was not designed as a punishment, although he was regularly accused by Baghdad residents as incompetent, the spokesman added. He made headlines in March 2014 when he described his city, beset by brutal sectarian violence and rife with corruption, as “more beautiful than New York and Dubai.”

Alwach’s appointment is a breakthrough for gender equality in Iraq, where rights groups say discrimination and violence against women is widespread. According to a UN report last year, at least a quarter of Iraqi women over the age of 12 are illiterate and just 14 percent enter the working world.

Baghdad is currently plagued by car bombings and bigoted killings. Militants from the Islamic State group also menace the capital city and have seized much of Anbar province to the west.

France Tracking 400 Possible Sleeper Cells

Recently, in an interview with The Associated Press, French Interior Minister Bernard Cazeneuve related that France is tracking hundreds of people believed to belong to possible sleeper cells for terror organizations like al-Qaeda or the Islamic State.

“Four hundred targets have been identified by our intelligence services that are more or less sleeper cells, affiliated or in relation with al-Qaeda-type organizations that can strike like the Kouachi brothers,” Cazeneuve related.

Said and Cherif Kouachi were Frenchborn brothers who killed 12 people in Paris on January 7 when they stormed

the satirical newspaper Charlie Hebdo.

They were shot dead by police in a confrontation two days later.

It has become difficult for countries to determine when a criminal or unhappy citizen will cross the line to terrorism and will commit terrorist acts against civilians.

Cazeneuve said he wants new measures to give intelligence services more leeway to monitor suspects’ electronic communications. He headed to the United States to try and persuade Internet giants to step up and help stem extremists’ ability to use propaganda videos to recruit and indoctrinate new followers.

He will be visiting Facebook, Twitter, Apple and Google in Silicon Valley.

“Ninety percent of those who commit terrorist acts fall into it after regularly consulting websites or blogs that call for or provoke terrorism,” Cazeneuve pointed out.

The pace of foreign fighters joining the Islamic State and other extremist groups has not slowed and at least 3,400 come from Western nations from around the world, U.S. intelligence officials say.

“We won’t be able to deal with this subject by always brushing the dust un-

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Merom Yerushalayim cordially invites you to an exclusive event of

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Merom Yerushalayim representatives will be available to discuss options for creating a beautiful home in Yerushalayim.

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The Week In News

Ferry Disaster Claims Many Lives A ferry in Bangladesh has tragically capsized, leaving a devastating death toll in its wake. Up to 140 passengers were thought to be on the ferry when it tipped over after being hit by a cargo vessel in the Padma River, about 25 miles northwest of Dhaka. Ferry accidents are unfortunately common in

Over 70 bodies have been found, according to Inspector Zihad Mia, who was overseeing the rescue operation.

Mia said it was not known how many passengers were missing and how many survived since ferries in Bangladesh usually do not have formal passenger lists. Jewel Mia, an official from the Bangladesh Inland Water Transport Authority, told reporters that up to 140 people were thought to be on the ferry when it sank.

A local police chief said that as many as eight of the passengers were children.

A passenger who survived said many

people were inside the vessel when it sank. “The passengers who were on the deck survived, but many who were inside were trapped,” Hafizur Rahman Sheikh related.

The Padma is one of the longest rivers in Bangladesh, where overcrowding and poor safety standards are often blamed for ferry disasters. Last August, a ferry with an official capacity of 85 passengers was carrying more than 200 when it capsized on the Padma River near Dhaka, leaving more than 100 people dead or missing. The ferry’s owner was arrested on charges of culpable homicide, unauthorized operation and overloading.

At least five people died earlier this month when another ferry sank in southern Bangladesh.

Venezuelan Mayor Arrested for Opposing Government The very vocal mayor of Caracas was arrested last week. Police broke

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

This week, Islamic State militants abducted at least 70 Christians, including women and children, after overrunning a string of villages in northeastern Syria.

ISIS has repeatedly targeted religious and ethnic minorities in Syria and Iraq since seizing control of large swaths of land in both countries. Islamic State fighters have ransacked churches, demolished Shiite and Sunni Muslim

the South Asian nation, which is crisscrossed by more than 130 rivers.



ISIS Kidnaps 70 Christians

shrines, and enslaved women of the Yazidi community, a tiny sect the terrorist group considers heretical.

The latest assault began before dawn on Monday, when the militants swept through the villages nestled along the banks of Khabur River near the town of Tal Tamr in Hassakeh province. The area is predominantly inhabited by Assyrians, an indigenous Christian people who trace their roots back to the ancient Mesopotamians.

During the raids, the militants took between 70 and 100 Assyrians captive, said Nuri Kino, the head of the activist group A Demand For Action, which focuses on religious minorities in the Middle East. He said some 3,000 people managed to flee the onslaught and have sought refuge in the cities of Hassakeh and Qamishli.

An Assyrian Christian woman from Tal Shamiram who now lives in Beirut said she has been scrambling to find out what has become of her parents, as well as her brother and his wife and kids.

“Land lines have been cut, their mobiles are closed,” she told The Associated Press. “Have they been slaughtered?

Are they still alive? We’re searching for any news.”

“My family visited me last month and returned to Syria. There were clashes but it was normal, nothing exceptional. I feel so helpless, I cannot do anything for them but pray,” she cried.

The Islamic State group’s online radio station, al-Bayan, said in a report on Tuesday that ISIS fighters had detained “tens of crusaders” and seized ten villages around Tal Tamr after clashes with Kurdish militiamen. ISIS frequently refers to Christians as “crusaders.”

It was not immediately clear what the Islamic State group planned to do with the Christians, although some are concerned they will be used as human shields or in a prisoner swap. Others are frightened that the terrorist group will kill the captives, as they recently released a video showing the beheading of 21 Egyptian Christians.

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der the rug,” Cazeneuve said. “At some point the dust gets thicker than the rug.”

Could the Charlie Hebdo attack have been prevented? The minister said the Kouachi brothers were under French surveillance from 2011 until 2014 after the U.S. government tipped off the French about Said Kouachi’s trip to Yemen, but the monitoring produced nothing that indicated the brothers were on the verge of a deadly attack.

Cherif Kouachi had served time for being part of a jihadi recruiting network and was apparently behind bars when he met the third Paris gunman, Amedy Coulibaly, a small-time criminal who became radicalized in prison. Coulibaly pledged allegiance to the Islamic State group in a posthumously released video that is still circulating among jihadis.

He murdered four Jews in his attack on a kosher supermarket one Friday afternoon.

“When you have terrorists who keep a low profile for years and then suddenly decide to act — either to obey an order from large terrorist organization such as al-Qaeda or of their own volition — then you need to be able to monitor them on a long term,” the minister said.

Further worrying European officials are the networks of radicals in jail who use their prison terms to influence others behind bars.

13

The Week In News into Antonio Ledezma’s office and carted off the longtime critic of Venezuela’s socialist government, adding to tensions on the anniversary of the outbreak of protests that paralyzed the nation a year ago. President Nicolas Maduro took to television and radio to say that Ledezma, one of the most vocal opposition leaders, would be punished for trying to sow unrest in Venezuela, which is struggling with severe economic problems.

“He’ll be held accountable for all his crimes,” Maduro thundered in a speech that TV and radio stations across the country were required to broadcast.

Protests could be heard around the capital as news of the arrest spread. As night fell, a few dozen people vented their anger in front of the headquarters of the intelligence service police, where

Ledezma was thought to be held.

Last week, Maduro named Ledezma among government critics and Western powers he accused of plotting a coup to bring down the government. He has made more than a dozen such claims since taking power in 2013. Ledezma mocked the accusation in multiple interviews, pointing out that the real destabilizing force in Venezuela was the government’s corruption.

Tensions have been running high in Venezuela this week, with the oneyear anniversary of the start of weeks of anti-government street protests that choked the country with tear gas and smoke from flaming barricades and resulted in more than 40 deaths. National police arrested several other mayors and former mayors during that unrest, including Leopoldo Lopez, who is considered by human rights groups as Latin America’s most high-profile political prisoner.

Allies of Ledezma called for more protests on Friday to demand his immediate release, a call echoed by Human Rights Watch. The U.S. State Department called the Venezuelan government’s accusations of coup-plotting “baseless and false” and said they are meant to draw attention away from

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mounting economic problems such as widespread shortages and inflation that reached 68 percent last year.

Turkey Runs Rescue Mission in Syria

“We got permission from no one; we conducted it with our own initiative,” an official said.

The tomb in question housed the remains of Suleyman Shah, the grandfather of Osman I, founder of the Ottoman Empire. The site along the Euphrates River is revered by Turkey, a strongly nationalist country whose rights there stem from a 1921 treaty with France, then the colonial power in Syria.

The Ottoman Empire collapsed in the early 20th century after World War I.

Denouncing AntiSemitism in France

Hundreds of Turkish troops backed by tanks took part in an overnight operation in Syria to evacuate dozens of trapped soldiers guarding an Ottoman tomb and to remove the remains entombed there amid fears the shrine was threatened by Islamic State militants.

Last week’s mission to save the Turkish soldiers stuck for months at the tomb of the grandfather of the founder of the Ottoman Empire was the first such major military incursion by Turkey since the Syrian conflict began in March 2011.

Turkish Prime Minister Ahmet Davutoglu said nearly 600 Turkish soldiers on some 100 tanks and armored personnel carriers crossed into Syria near the border town of Kobani, as drones and airplanes flew reconnaissance missions overhead. One group traveled to the tomb, some 35 kilometers from Turkey on the banks of the Euphrates River in Syria’s embattled Aleppo province, he said. Another group seized an area only 200 meters from the Turkish border in Syria’s Ashma region to be the new home for the tomb, according to a statement from President Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s office. Turkish media later showed nationalistic images of three Turkish soldiers raising the country’s flag at the new site.

Syria’s Foreign Ministry denounced the Turkish operation, calling it a “flagrant aggression.” In a statement carried by the state news agency, it also declared that the mission demonstrated “the depth of ties” between Turkey and the Islamic State group. Syria routinely accuses Turkey of supporting the extremist group. The ministry said Ankara informed the Syrian Consulate in Istanbul ahead of the operation but did not wait for approval from Damascus.

French President François Hollande announced a reinforcement of measures against expressions of racial or anti-Semitic hatred during the annual dinner of the French Representative Council of Jewish Institutions (CRIF) this week.

Representatives of the French Council of the Muslim Faith (CFCM) boycotted the dinner in reaction to some controversial remarks by the CRIF’s Chairman Roger Cukierman.

Cukierman had sparked debate by saying that with regards to anti-Semitism, “every act of violence today is committed by young Muslims.”

“There is no ordinary anti-Semitism,” Hollande declared, saying it was a “leprosy” that “is still there 70 years after the Shoah,” and that “France will strongly fight against it.” The president also said Prime Minister Manuel Valls would present a “wide-ranging and concrete” plan of action in the following days.

“Faster and more effective sanctions” will be taken, he promised. Hollande also said he wished that “any expression of hatred, racism, or anti-Semitism should come under criminal law instead of press freedom law.” Hollande added that the government would strengthen the legal tools against people tempted to join jihadi groups.

The president also insisted on the importance of the fight against terrorism at a European level and welcomed the implementation “by the end of the year” of the Passenger Name Record (PNR), the passenger flight data-sharing scheme.

The Burning of the Books It was a symbol of the dichotomy found in the world. While many were

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The Week In News watching the Academy Awards ceremony on Sunday night in the comfort of their homes, the people of Mosul were forced to watch a different show.

Flames flickered high as ISIS members burned the contents of the Mosul Public Library. Among the many thousands of books it housed, more than 8,000 rare old books and manuscripts were burned as well.

“ISIS militants bombed the Mosul Public Library. They used improvised explosive devices,” said Ghanim alTa’an, the director of the library. Notables in Mosul tried to persuade ISIS members to spare the library, but they failed.

The former assistant director of the library Qusai All Faraj said that the Mosul Public Library was established in

1921, the same year that saw the birth of the modern Iraq. Among its lost collections were manuscripts from the eighteenth century, Syriac books printed in Iraq’s first printing house in the nineteenth century, books from the Ottoman era, Iraqi newspapers from the early twentieth century and some old antiques like an astrolabe and sand glass used by ancient Arabs. The library had hosted the personal libraries of more than 100 notable families from Mosul over the last century.

During the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq in 2003, the library was looted and destroyed by mobs. However, the people living nearby managed to save most of its collections and rich families bought back the stolen books and they were returned to the library, All Faraj related.

“900 years ago, the books of the Arab philosopher Averroes were collected before his eyes...and burned.

One of his students started crying while witnessing the burning. Averroes told him... the ideas have wings...but I cry today over our situation,” said Rayan al-Hadidi, an activist and a blogger from Mosul. Al-Hadidi related that a state of anger and sorrow are now dominating Mosul.

Burning books didn’t satisfy ISIS members’ thirst for destruction. On the same day the library was destroyed, ISIS abolished another old church in Mosul. The Mosul University Theater was burned as well, according to eyewitnesses. In al-Anbar province, Western Iraq, the ISIS campaign of burning books had managed to destroy 100,000 titles, according to local officials. Last December, ISIS burned Mosul University’s central library.

Iraq, what was once the cradle of civilization, the birthplace of agriculture and writing and the home of the Sumerian, Akkadian, Assyrian, Babylonian and Arab civilizations, had never witnessed such an assault on its rich cultural heritage since the Mongol era in the Middle Ages.

Last week, a debate in Washington and Baghdad became heated over when, how and who will liberate Mosul. A plan was announced to liberate the city in April or May by more than 20,000 US trained Iraqi soldiers. At that point, supposing ISIS will be defeated, it’s doubtful if Mosul would have any sign of its rich history left standing.

Tunnel Discovered Near Torontonian Sporting Venue

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On Monday it was reported that a sophisticated tunnel was discovered near a major sporting venue and a university in Toronto. A municipal worker was walking through the woods near York University and the Rexall Center last month when he spotted a piece of corrugated metal on the ground, lifted it up and found a passageway.

This was no children’s hideout. The tunnel was about seven meters long and 2.5 meters tall and was lit by an electric generator. The walls and ceilings had been reinforced and tools had been left inside.

The discovery of the tunnel set off some concerns. Toronto is hosting the Pan American Games in July and the Rexall Center is one of the venues. The facility also hosts major tennis events.

Authorities have now filled the tunnel but police were tight-lipped about what its purpose might have been.

Canadian authorities are on alert following two Islamist-influenced attacks last year that resulted in the deaths of two unarmed soldiers in Ottawa and Montreal.

Israel Four-Year-Old Terror Victim Dies

The funeral of 4-year-old Adele Bitton was attended by hundreds of people last week. Bitton, who was tragically injured in a 2013 rock-throwing attack, died of complications of pneumonia on February 17. The funeral took place in the West Bank settlement of Yakir, near the site of the attack that left Adele Bitton with severe brain damage.

Her mother, Adva Bitton, was driving in the West Bank when the car was hit by rocks, causing her to veer out of her lane and into a truck. Adele suffered severe injuries, leaving her handicapped for the past two years. Five suspects were arrested in connection with the attack.

“When you were a baby, you didn’t like to sleep,” Adva Bitton eulogized at the funeral. “‘No sleep, Ima,’ you would wake up at night and cry, ‘Abba, Ima, pacifier, bottle, no sleep.’ Now I understand that you had to get things done.

You managed to get a lot done in this short life.” Mrs. Bitton referred to the stone-throwing attack as “the day your body was murdered by the evil people, but your soul continued to pulsate. You didn’t give up, my warrior. The terrorists didn’t manage to take away your beauty. My beauty, my heart is breaking,” she said.

Adele died after being admitted to the hospital days earlier with a lung infection. The infection was related to a neurological condition developed as a result of the attack, hospital officials said.

Treasure Found off Israel’s Coast Scuba divers off Israel’s Mediterranean coast were seeing gold this week when they discovered a huge trove of sunken coins. The treasure includes

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The Week In News about 2,000 golden pieces dating back more than 1,000 years, the country’s antiquities authority said. “The largest treasure of gold coins discovered in Israel was found in recent weeks on the seabed in the ancient harbor in Caesarea,” the authority said in a statement.

It was by pure chance that members of a diving club in the Roman-era

port had come across the coins, which weighed nine kilograms but are described as “priceless.” “At first they thought they had spotted a toy coin from a game and it was only after they understood the coin was the real thing that they collected several coins and quickly returned to the shore in order to inform the director of the dive club about their

find,” the statement read.

Experts from the authority called to the site uncovered “almost 2,000 gold coins in different denominations” circulated by the Fatimid Caliphate, which ruled much of the Middle East and North Africa from 909 to 1171. Kobi Sharvit, director of the marine archaeology unit at the Israel Antiquities Authority, said

excavations would be carried out in the hopes of shedding more light on the origin of the treasure.

The Israeli Antiquities Authority declined to put a cash value on the coins, which it said had been exposed as a result of winter storms. The find was “so valuable that it’s priceless,” spokeswoman Yoli Schwartz said, adding the haul was now the property of the state, and that there was no finder’s fee.

Jerusalem Mayor Subdues Stabber in Safra Square

A 27-year-old Chareidi father of four was stabbed by an Arab teenager in Jerusalem on Sunday evening in a terror attack. The incident took place in Safra Square in central Jerusalem. Nir Barkat, the mayor of Jerusalem, witnessed the stabbing and, along with his bodyguard, subdued the terrorist until police arrived.

The victim, Avraham Goldstein, sustained moderate wounds and was taken to Jerusalem’s Shaare Zedek Medical Center.

“I felt a sharp blow in my stomach.

I began shouting that there was a stabbing and that they should move away.

Then he came to stab me again and I blocked him with my tefillin,” Goldstein recalled.

Police forces and MADA paramedics were called to the scene, where the latter administered first aid. The police

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The Week In News say that Barkat and his bodyguard witnessed the event, prompting the guard to overtake the stabber and hold him until forces arrived. The stabber was an 18-year-old Palestinian teen from Ramallah.

“I was traveling in a car next to the IDF Square [Safra Square] when my team suddenly saw a terrorist with a knife right next to us. I immediately jumped out of the car together with my team, [my bodyguard] pulled out his gun and together we held the terrorist until security forces arrived; we also attempted to treat the victim,” Mayor Barkat related.

Barkat visited Goldstein in the hospital, earning accolades from officials and on social media, where he became an instant celebrity.

There has been a big rise in terror attacks in Jerusalem in recent months, mostly carried out by so-called “lone wolf” perpetrators and targeting individuals. Many of the attacks centered on public transport hubs in the capital, including several attacks in which terrorists plowed into crowds waiting at light rail stops.

The last terror attack in Jerusalem took place six weeks ago when a

21-year-old Jewish man was stabbed with a man wielding a screwdriver in Jerusalem’s Old City. A 15-year-old Arab from East Jerusalem was arrested in connection with the attack the following day.

Last month a Palestinian youth armed with a knife stabbed a 12 people on a busy rush hour bus in central Tel Aviv. The terrorist fled and was hunted down by security officials who were in the area.

rest of the world. The combination of Purim and the costumes turns it into a kind of fantasy.”

Yaari, a contributing photographer to Jerusalem-based photo agency Flash90, has been published in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Time Magazine, le Monde, The Guardian and Financial Times.

His images, along with the other shortlisted photographers, will be shown at London’s Somerset House from April 24-May 10 as part of the 2015 Sony World Photography Awards Exhibition.

Purim Photos May Win Award It’s almost a year later, but last year’s photos of Purim in Jerusalem’s Mea Shearim may win Israeli photographer Gili Yaari the Sony World Photography Award, one of the world’s major photography competitions.

Yaari’s series, “Purim Celebrations in Jerusalem,” was shortlisted for the Professional Arts and Culture category of the competition, selected from 173,444 images from 171 countries.

The winners will be announced on April 23.

The shortlisted images, taken last Purim, March 2014, show ultra-Orthodox men and boys celebrating Purim in Jerusalem’s Mea Shearim neighborhood. It’s one of Yaari’s favorite locations to photograph during the festive holiday.

“Jerusalem, and Mea Shearim specifically, are just visually different,” he said. “They look and feel like a different place and that sparks an interest in the

Israel Wards off Cyber-Attacks According to top cybersecurity firm Kaspersky Lab, Israel has managed to dodge a number of massive cyberattacks in recent months. The Russianbased firm’s Global Research and Analysis Team reported a major cross-border hacking attack called the Equation Group, which Kaspersky said was worse than any attack ever encountered.

A spokesperson for Kaspersky Israel

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The Week In News said the malware operation missed Israel, particularly its banks, but hit nearly every other country in the Middle East.

nois) and Dianne Feinstein (D-California) wrote in a letter to Netanyahu that their intention in calling for the meeting was to “maintain Israel’s dialogue with both political parties in Congress.”

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The group of viruses has been infecting systems for over a decade, according to the research team. Among the tools used by the Equation Group is malware that can rewrite a hard drive’s operating system using a flash drive and a complex rewriting system. Since 2001, the Equation Group has been infecting thousands, or perhaps even tens of thousands, of victims in more than 30 countries worldwide. They have targeted government and diplomatic institutions, as well as such sectors as telecommunications, aerospace, energy, nuclear research, oil and gas, finance, military and nanotechnology.

Among the most infected by the Equation Group are Iran, Syria, Pakistan, Russia and China, while most Arab countries are listed with a “moderate” infection rate. The U.S. has a low infection rate; Israel, along with most European countries, Canada and Australia, is listed as having avoided any attacks by the malware.

Isaac Ben-Israel, head of the Tel Aviv University’s Yuval Neeman Workshop for Science, Technology and Security, said that Israeli government’s agencies and institutions alone are victims of hacking attempts between 100,000 and a million times a day. The numbers depend usually on current events with higher volume occurring during times of increased tension, such as last summer’s Operation Protective Edge. “We’ve shown we can stand up to attacks,” said Ben-Israel. “As a cybersecurity power, Israel has been able to develop effective defenses against attacks of all kinds.”

Bibi Invited to Meet Senators Two Democratic senators have invited Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to meet with lawmakers from their party during his upcoming visit to Washington. Senators Richard Durbin (D-Illi-

The prime minister accepted an invitation last month from Rep. John Boehner (R-Ohio), Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, to address Congress but the White House protested that Boehner had not cleared the invitation with Obama or Democrats in Congress.

“This unprecedented move threatens to undermine the important bipartisan approach towards Israel — which as long-standing supporters of Israel troubles us deeply,” the senators wrote to Netanyahu and warned that the upheaval over the address could turn Israel’s security into a partisan issue. “It sacrifices deep and well-established cooperation on Israel for short-term partisan points — something that should never be done with Israeli security and which we fear could have lasting repercussions,” they wrote.

Netanyahu’s speech is controversial because it puts Israel on a collision course with the Obama administration as it negotiates with Iran over its nuclear program, negotiations that Netanyahu says put Israel at risk. The speech is also set just two weeks before the prime minister faces elections back home. But last week Netanyahu insisted that the political furor over his upcoming speech should not cloud the issue of the looming nuclear deal between world powers and Iran that, in his opinion, will fail to prevent Iran from producing nuclear weapons.

Some Democratic lawmakers have said they will not attend the speech, although Nancy Pelosi insists that this is not a “boycott” of Netanyahu’s address.

Netanyahu intends to argue before Congress on March 3 that the international community should increase its pressure on Iran rather than ease sanctions against it under the terms of an emerging nuclear deal. Britain, China, France, Russia, the United States and Germany — known as the P5+1 — have been seeking a comprehensive accord that would prevent Tehran from developing a nuclear bomb in return for an

The Week In News

Shin Bet Dissolves Terror Cell in Hebron

Eleven ruthless terrorists were arrested last month after a joint Shin

Tel Aviv Recognized as a Waterfront Urban Mecca

Bet-IDF operation busted a Hamas cell in Hebron that had been plotting an attack inside Israel. At first the discovery wasn’t announced but on Monday the gag order was lifted and the Shin Bet revealed the operation.

Saheib Maamun Saltan, 20, a Hamas activist from Hebron, and his cousin, 28-year-old Salam Abbas Saltan, were named as the key figures in the cell. The suspects admitted during questioning in early December that they had tried to carry out a terror attack in the Tel Rumeida settlement in the Hebron area. According to the plot, they intended to use a small bomb to attract IDF troops into an area and then once the soldiers gathered, they planned to detonate a much larger explosive device. Thankfully, the plan never came to fruition due to technical problems.

The two suspects collected data on the movements of Israeli civilians in Hebron and Jerusalem, and according to their leaders, some of the cell members had agreed to carry out suicide bombings. As part of the investigation, the suspects handed over explosives devices and two weapons that were earmarked for use in the attacks.

“The cell’s activities show the real

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According to the U.S. legal system, the Palestinian Authority owes victims of terror attacks a lot of money. A U.S. court in New York concluded on Monday that the Palestinian Authority is liable to repay for damages in six terror attacks in Israel over a decade ago.

During the second Palestinian intifada between 2002 and 2004, 33 people were killed and hundreds were wounded in the attacks in and around Jerusalem. The jury awarded victims of the attacks more than $218 million. Some of the victims were American citizens, therefore the lawsuit was filed in a U.S. court, although the PLO and PA are adamant that it shouldn’t have been tried here.

The Palestinian groups expressed apprehension at the decision and promised they would appeal. A joint statement by the PLO and the Palestinian National Authority (PNA) described the charges as “baseless” and said they were disappointed by the ruling. However, the victims’ families and their le-

ern Israeli city on the Mediterranean.

The historic port of Jaffa has found new life in recent years with a vibrant gallery, café, and restaurant scene.”

Looking to catch some rays? The world’s other top oceanfront cities are Tallinn, Estonia; St. John’s, Canada; San Diego, California; Marseille, France; Perth and Brisbane, Australia; Durban, South Africa; Vladivostok, Russia; and Portland, Maine.

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US Court: PLO to Pay for Terrorism

gal teams allege that internal documents prove that the attacks were approved by the Palestinian authorities.

“Those involved in the attacks still receive salaries from the Palestinian Authority and still get promoted in rank while in jail,” Nitsana Darshan-Leitner of the Israel-based Shurat HaDin Law Center, a lawyer who is representing the victims’ families, pointed out.

Defense lawyer Mark Rochon argued that the PA and PLO did not have any prior knowledge of the attacks before they actually occurred and therefore the organization should not be held liable. He claims that the suicide bombers and gunmen acted alone.

Initially, the victims had requested more than $218.5 million. The U.S. Anti-Terrorism Act will allow for the fine to be tripled.

On Monday, Netanyahu’s office released a statement after the decision, saying Israel expected the wider international community “to continue to punish those who support terrorism just as the U.S. federal court has done and to back the countries that are fighting terrorism.” Despite the victory, there is “no justice that can console” the families of those who lost their loved ones in the attacks.

The Palestinian leadership has vowed to appeal the decision.

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easing of economic sanctions. The cutoff point for the technical details of such an accord is June 30.

This week it was reported that the United States and Iran are working on a two-phase deal that will clamp down on Tehran’s nuclear program for at least ten years—and then will allow them to slowly ramp up activities to produce what can be used to make nuclear weapons. Most critics were shocked to hear that essentially Obama is giving the Iranians ten years to produce a bomb.

On Monday, Israeli Intelligence Minister Yuval Steinitz said Israel considers the negotiations “totally unsatisfactory” because it would allow Iran to be “extremely close” to a “dangerous breakout program.” Referring to the latest suggested compromise, he said, “For a 10-year delay [in Iran’s nuclear program] you are sacrificing the future of Israel and the U.S. and the future of the world.”

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The Week In News threat of Hamas in Hebron, in particular from military operatives who had been detained in the past and who had returned to the cycle of terror,” the Shin Bet said on Monday.

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National New Top Defenseman Sworn In

Ashton Carter was sworn in last week as President Barack Obama’s fourth secretary of defense. The appointment comes amid multiple global

threats and tens of thousands of American troop still abroad. Carter pledged to offer his most candid strategic advice and carefully consider decisions about sending troops into harm’s way.

Hours after taking the oath of office, Carter met with Obama and Vice President Joe Biden in the Oval Office to discuss the security challenges that await him. Obama said their discussion covered battles in Ukraine, the threat from Islamic State militants, and countering violent extremism that he said has been “turbocharged through the Internet.”

Carter, 60, replaces Chuck Hagel, who resigned under pressure after a rocky relationship with the White House. In an email to all Defense Department personnel, Carter wrote that the challenging times “demand leadership and focus.” Carter also said that he promises to make “decisions about sending you into harm’s way with the greatest reflection and utmost care — because this is my highest responsibility as secretary of defense.”

Joe Biden said Carter faces “many tough missions,” ranging from battling Islamic State militants and strengthening the NATO alliance, to technological advancements and budget cuts. “This

is the guy that fits the job,” Biden said, calling Carter a “profoundly capable manager.”

Carter responded that he was taking office with three commitments. He pledged to help Obama make the best possible decisions about U.S. and global security; to protect the dignity, safety and well-being of service members; and to build a force for the future that embraces change.

New US Ambassador for Religious Freedom is Jewish

dom for, like most Jews, I know all too well that over the centuries the Jewish people have been a quintessential victim of religious persecution, ethnic cleansing, and demonization,” Saperstein said.

“Through too many tragedies,” he continued, “we have learned firsthand the cost to universal rights, security and well-being of religious communities when good people remain silent in the face of persecution.”

Although he was “humbled” and prepared to accept his duties, he acknowledged the challenges that lay ahead.

“Even in Western Europe,” Saperstein added, “we are witnessing a steady increase in anti-Muslim acts and rhetoric and anti-Semitic discourse and acts of desecration and violence against Jewish individuals, synagogues and institutions and communities that we thought we would never, never see again after World War II.”

In Alaska, All is Well

David Saperstein has been sworn in as U.S. ambassador-at-large for religious freedom, the first Jew to hold the post. He is the fourth individual in the position.

Saperstein was ushered into the Obama administration at a ceremony attended by roughly 300 people at the State Department where U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry praised him as President Barack Obama’s “chief adviser on religious liberty.”

“Either David Saperstein was created with the job of ambassador-at-large for international religious freedom in mind, or the job was created with him in mind,” Kerry quipped.

Saperstein was a member of Obama’s Advisory Council on FaithBased and Neighborhood Partnerships from 2010 to 2011. He also was a member of the U.S. Commission on International Religious Freedom from 1999 to 2001. For four decades, Saperstein served as director of the Religious Action Center for Reform Judaism. He also sat on the boards of the NAACP and the National Religious Partnership on the Environment.

“During my career, my mandate has indeed covered a wide range of issues, but there are few that have been as central to my heart as that of religious free-

When it comes to being in a state of well-being, being well out of the continental United States seems to be the key. Alaska has nabbed the top spot in the United States for the good life, according to a Gallup-Healthways Annual Well-Being Index. Hawaii and South Dakota followed Alaska in spots two and three. In last place came West Virginia, for the sixth year in a row, and Kentucky stayed in the 49th spot, where it’s also been for a number of years.

Seems like when you’re down in the dumps you tend to stay that way.

What makes for a better well-being? The Index considers how people feel about and experience their daily lives and looks at their health across five categories: purpose, social, financial, community and physical. Interestingly, states with an overall low sense of well-being may not rank poorly in all five of the categories. For example,

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The Week In News Louisiana (No. 40) ranked on the lowest end in social, financial, community and physical elements, but people’s sense of purpose in the Pelican State was comparable to states in the top 10.

Over the past seven years, Alaska has ranked in the top 10 four times.

And Alaskans are having a good year for a reason, according to Dan Witters, research director of the Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index. “They do a lot of the blocking and tackling, as far as taking care of themselves and making good choices, but also demonstrating good holistic well-being in ways that extend beyond the conventional physical wellness,” he pointed out.

While West Virginia remained stagnant, there were some shakeups in the rankings. North Dakota dropped from the first spot in 2013 to the 23rd spot on this year’s list. Hawaii and Colorado are the only states that have placed in the top 10 every year since 2008.

Where do people have the most to smile about in the U.S.? Here are the top ten spots for well-being: 1. Alaska 2. Hawaii 3. South Dakota 4. Wyoming 5. Montana 6. Colorado 7. Nebraska 8. Utah 9. New Mexico 10. Texas

Soldier Guilty of Desertion

planned to leave. Meanwhile, the defense maintained he was kidnapped by insurgents and said the prosecution’s case was circumstantial.

New Terror Video Threatens Malls in Western Countries

Wassef Hassoun was a corporal in the United States Marine Corps in 2004 in Iraq. What many believe started off as a joke ended in a prison sentence this week. Hassoun made it appear as if he had been captured by terrorists on June 19, 2004. Now, nearly a decade later, Hassoun has been punished for the distasteful jest.

The judge at Camp Lejeune, Marine Maj. Nicholas Martz, found Hassoun guilty of desertion and the disgraced soldier was convicted of losing his service pistol. Hassoun was given two years and five days’ confinement this week and he will have a reduction in rank, loss of pay, and a dishonorable discharge.

Prosecutors argued that Hassoun made preparations to flee his base in Fallujah in 2004 and told others that he

Don’t be surprised if you see increased security at your local mall.

Muslims have been urged to attack shopping malls in U.S., Canada, Britain, and other Western countries in a video purported to be broadcast by Somalia’s al-Qaeda-linked rebel group al-Shabab.

The extremist group put together an hour-long video replete with several threats. They also threatened Kenya with terror attacks similar to the September 2013 assault on the Westgate Mall in Nairobi when 67 hostages were killed.

The narrator of the film was masked in a black and white scarf with a camou-

flage jacket; he spoke in a British accent.

He ended the dialogue by encouraging Muslims to attack malls and specifically mentioned the Mall of America in Minnesota, the West Edmonton Mall in Canada, and the Westfield Mall in Stratford, England.

Al-Shabab has carried out attacks in neighboring Kenya, Uganda and Djibouti, which all have troops fighting the extremists as part of the multinational African Union force. The al-Qaeda affiliate has never operated outside East Africa and the Horn of Africa.

U.S. Department of Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson called the video “the new phase” of the global terrorist threat in a morning talk show interview and warned the public to be cautious and observant. “These groups are relying more and more on independent actors to become inspired, drawn to the cause and they’ll attack on their own,” Johnson said, speaking on CNN’s “State of the Union.”

“I am very concerned about serious potential threats of independent actors here in the United States. We’ve seen this now in Europe, we’ve seen this in Canada,” he added.

The Mall of America, one of the nation’s largest malls, said in a statement that it was “aware of a threatening video which includes a mention and images of the mall,” and said extra security is already in place.

Shoppers over the weekend seemed undeterred by the threat. One shopper wittily said, “I’m more afraid of the cold today than any terrorists.”

Another mall-goer, David Modrynski, said he had discussed whether or not to visit the mall with his wife and children after hearing about the video but ultimately decided that it wouldn’t force him to change his plans. “But we can’t stop living our lives because somebody says they’re going to do something,” Modrynski said.

The Kenyan government chose to disregard the video. Interior Minister Spokesman Mwenda Njoka said, “They’re using propaganda to legitimize what cannot be legitimized. When you lead a group to go and attack a shopping mall and kill innocent shoppers that cannot be legitimized, those were not soldiers.”

This is not the first time Minnesota has been a target. Minnesota is home to the largest Somali population in the nation. It has been reported that in the last eight years, more than 22 Somali men traveled from Minnesota to Somalia to join al-Shabab.

Continued on page 30

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The Week In News Remembering the Miracle on Ice In 1980, the United States Olympic hockey team was a group of heroes, defeating the Soviet Union in their Miracle on Ice in Lake Placid. Now, 35 years later, the group of American heroes reunit-

ed in their place of triumph.

“It feels exactly the same,” Dave Christian said on Saturday night as the members of the 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team returned to the rink that made them famous. “You could feel the electricity in the [locker] room. It’s still there.”

The “Relive the Miracle” reunion at Herb Brooks Arena attracted more than

5,000 fans for a two-hour celebration of one of the most memorable upsets in sports history. Every surviving player from the team made the trip, including Mark Pavelich, who drove from his Oregon home with two dogs. It was the first time the team had all been together since that memorable night.

Missing was Brooks, the Hall of Fame coach who was killed in a car ac-

cident in 2003, and rugged defenseman Bob Suter, who died at age 57 in September.

“Herb had a feel for the game during the game,” goalie Jim Craig remembered. “He would get you off the ice before you could commit a penalty. He was ahead of his time in many ways.”

The U.S. took the lead on Friday, Feb. 22, 1980, against the powerful Soviets on Eruzione’s goal midway through the third period. It was the last goal of the game as Craig stood tall in net.

The Americans finished the 4-3 upset to the sound of broadcaster Al Michaels’ call of, “Do you believe in miracles?” Two days later, the U.S. rallied to beat Finland 4-2 for the gold in a game the Americans had to win just to medal.

“In sports in general, everyone roots for the underdog, which we certainly were an underdog,” Christian related.

“We were aware of the political situation in the world, but in a lot of respects for us it truly was a game, a great challenge.

“We were up against what at that time was considered one of the best teams that had been put together,” he said. “So in that respect it was just a game. I think it gave people the sense of feeling good. You can’t help but smile.”

When the U.S. won the gold, it was a time of world strife. The Soviet army had just invaded Afghanistan as the Cold War simmered, a group of Americans was being held hostage in Iran, the U.S. economy was hurting, and President Jimmy Carter already had announced a U.S. boycott of the Summer Olympics in Moscow.

The sociopolitical impact of that era has since faded. Now the threats are different. But the memory of that February day 35 years ago in Lake Placid is still fresh for many.

“I’ve played on a lot of teams, and this is the best team, the closest team I ever played on,” Neal Broten said. “As a younger guy, I looked up to all these guys. It was a privilege and honor for me to represent our country with these guys and do what we did.”

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of Heaven

The messengers of Kupat Ha'ir will pray on Purim day, at 26 different auspicious sites throughout the world, following the detailed guidance of Maran Hagaon Rav Chaim Kanievsky, shlit"a and Maran Hagaon Rav Yaakov Edelstein, shlit"a.

On Ta'anis Esther, a day auspicious for prayer, a minyan of Torah scholars will pray at the gravesites of Mordechai and Esther in the city of Amdan in Iran on behalf of donors to Kupat Ha'ir.

Matanos L‫׳‬evyonim Throug Kupat Ha‫׳‬ir

Hagaon Reb Chaim kanie fsky in his hand w ritten letter

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The graves of Mordechai and Esther

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Yeshuos this Purim

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2 8

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Donations can be sent to: American Friends of Kupat Hair - 4415 14th Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11219

Donate Online: www.kupat.org

‫קו‬ ‫העפת‬ ‫יר‬

The Week In News

That’s Odd Sewage Brewage

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Think your beer smells a little funny? Well, you may want to check out where it’s from. Some homebrewers in Portland, Oregon, will soon start to use Clean Water Services for the high-purity water that it produces. Homebrewers are very particular about the water they use when they practice their art. The water coming from Clean Water Services is so crystal clear and so pure that even healthy minerals are stripped away.

And so are some other stuff. You see,

water produced by Clean Water Services originated in the sewer—or maybe your toilet.

This summer, those homebrewers may get their chance. The Portland-area utility is close to receiving approval to provide homebrewers with recycled, purified wastewater—an ingredient so agile, it’ll have the brewmasters in Burton-upon-Trent raising a glass.

“You look at Portland. We’ve got about 70 breweries in the metropolitan area,” says Mark Jockers, spokesperson for Clean Water Services. “The thing that they’re intrigued with, from an experimentation standpoint, is that this high-purity water is a blank slate.”

Apparently people don’t mind where their water that’s turned into beer comes from. All those who testified at a hearing to allow recycled water to be used for beer by homebrewers were in favor of the plan. Once the Environmental Quality Commission concurs, it’s a done deal.

“We’re trying to advance the nature of the conversation about water. There’s a public perception that water that comes out of the tap doesn’t have any history,” Jockers says. “You can’t look at its history, you’ve got to look at its

quality.”

Well, Mr. Jockers, when I’m drinking something, I think that looking at its history is a safe thing to do.

Bankers Clear out the Bank

“Yesterday we could only open one of the treasury’s doors. We hope to open the next one today,” the central bank director for Afghanistan’s southwestern region, Fazel Ahmad Azimi, said about the investigation.

Confidence in Afghanistan’s banking system is extremely weak and this incident further decreases citizens’ belief in the system.

The Kandahar raid is believed to have been carried out by a senior official at the bank, an employee of nine years, with the help of his son and brother-inlaw who were also on staff. It is said they are now on their way to Pakistan, where, for their safety, I suggest they don’t flash their new-found cash.

A Stone Cold Suspect Hey, bankers, need some money?

Well, you know just where to find it.

Recently staff at a branch of Afghanistan’s central bank in southern Kandahar province stole the show when they ran away with 81 million Afghanis ($1.4 million) from their own bank, clearing out the bank’s vault.

It’s hard for your children to believe you when you tell them that Disney characters are not real when members of the police department are looking to arrest them.

The people of Harlan, Kentucky, are so fed up with winter that their police department issued an APB for Queen Elsa

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juice, according to Shabista, who even hosts an annual “wedding anniversary” party for the pair, inviting hundreds of friends to celebrate.

Chunmun is now only ten years old and may well outlive the couple as monkeys can live for between 35 and 40 years. After his death, the money will go towards ensuring the welfare of monkeys in India, where the animals are frequently abused.

The Postman Comes Knocking in Antarctica Looking for a job? Well, if you’re in good shape, can carry heavy boxes over slippery rocks and slushy snow, and have no problem skipping showers for a month, then have I got a job for you! The U.K. Antarctic Heritage Trust is looking for assistants to help run its post office museum and gift shop at Port Lockroy, located on Goudier Island off the Antarctic Peninsula. If you think you’ll miss your friends while you’re working down, down under, don’t worry—you’ll make more. There probably are around three other people working

Friends don’t let friends drink irresponsibly on Purim.

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Chunmun has been a cherished son to Brajesh and Shabista Srivastava. He is playful, cute and maybe a tad too hairy. Now, the Srivastavas have said that they will be leaving all their wealth to Chunmun and have set up a trust to ensure he will be well taken care of after their demise.

Chunmun, though, doesn’t have much to say about his future inheritance because, well, Chunmun doesn’t say much at all. He is, in fact, a monkey and the couple has said that their lives have

become enriched and more prosperous after they adopted him. They have no (human) children.

“People might say we are mad, they might even ridicule us. But we know how valuable Chunmun is to us,” said Shabista, 45. “We are childless and Chunmun is a son to me. We want to ensure that even when we are not alive, Chunmun’s life is not affected and he continues to live the way he does.”

The monkey is the only relative the two have since they were cast out by their families when they married against their families’ wishes. Although they started out poor, since they adopted the primate, Brajesh and Shabista have prospered; they now own a house and have land and savings. Shabista is a successful lawyer and her 48-year-old husband owns several businesses including a cable TV network and a flour mill – all named after Chunmun.

Chunmum does not live a life in the jungle. He has his own air-conditioned room in the couple’s house, which he shares with his “wife” – a female simian named Bitti who the couple have also taken in. I guess that makes her their daughter-in-law.

The adorable couple likes to eat Chinese food and drink tea and mango



If she’s real, Elsa has been hitting Kentucky hard. The state experienced a severe cold snap last week with wind chills as low as 30 degrees below zero.

Residents were advised by police to “take the precautions you need to keep

you, your friends, family, neighbors and pets safe during the snow queen’s mad spell.”

Brrr.

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of Ardendelle (of Frozen fame), seeking to arrest her on charges of creating dangerously cold weather. The suspect is slippery and has a cold demeanor.

“Suspect is a blonde female last seen wearing a long blue dress and is known to burst into song ‘Let it Go!’” the notice on Facebook reads. “As you can see by the weather she is very dangerous. Do not attempt to apprehend her alone.” According to the film, the “Snow Queen” can control the weather and conjure snow and ice at will.

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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The Week In News down there as well and thousands of penguins loitering nearby during the five months of summer that you’ll be working. With no showers, heat, or hot water, we’re sure you’ll make friends fast.

Each summer (November through March) around 18,000 people visit the remote outpost by boat twice a day.

Around 70,000 pieces of mail are processed every year.

Some of the requirements for the job are highly unusual. Those applying should be confident and coordinated—“can you carry a big heavy box over slippery rocks and slushy snow whilst dodging penguins?” They should have the “ability to get on with it—can

you identify what needs doing and get on and do it without having to be asked, whether it be washing up, sweeping the floor or digging snow?” And they should have “adaptability to different situations – are you happy not to shower for up to a month, live in close proximity to three people and 2,000 smelly penguins for five months?”

Plus, applicants need to be happy about doing all of that. “Can you enthuse to visitors when it is -5C° and blowing a blizzard as well as cook supper cheerfully after a long cold day and very little sleep?” Prospective staffers must also be “prepared to be on call and smiling for all waking hours, seven days a week.” There are plenty of waking hours on the island. During the summer, there is almost 24 hours of sunlight down there.

Those interested in applying should know that the position pays about $1,250 a month. But we all know that despite the pay, thousands will be throwing their hat into the ring for a chance to hang out with the penguins and enjoy the smelly odor of their co-workers for a few months a year.

A Tight Run When Canadian legislator Pat Martin ran out of the House of Commons during a vote last week, some thought

maybe he had an emergency. Others thought he had to urgently speak to someone. Still others didn’t know what to think until Martin unveiled the reason for his hasty departure: a tight pair of underwear.

Martin, who belongs to the official opposition New Democrats, bolted as members of Parliament began to rise one by one to vote. He later blamed his departure on an unwise purchase at a local store.

“They had men’s underwear on for half price and I bought a bunch that was clearly too small for me. I find it difficult to sit for any length of time,” he told the chamber to guffaws and applause from fellow legislators.

Martin, one of the more colorful Canadian members of Parliament, did return in time to cast his vote. 

Around The Community

37 THE JEWISH HOME

Bnos Bais Yaakov’s 21st Annual Dinner - A Garden Full of Success

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Parents of the Year Award: Dr. Akiva Bergman, Dinner Chairman; Rabbi Yaakov Bender, Rosh Hayeshiva, Yeshiva Darchei Torah, Presenting Award; Rabbi Moshe Bender, Parents of the Year Awardee; Mr. Mel Zachter, Trustee, Bnos Bais Yaakov; Rabbi Yisroel Tepper, Director of Development, Bnos Bais Yaakov

Guests of Honor: Dr. Akiva Bergman, Dinner Chairman; Mr. Lloyd Keilson presenting award; Mr. Mel Zachter, Mr. Moish Hirth, Mr. Sam Bergman, Trustees, Bnos Bais Yaakov; Rabbi Yisroel Tepper, Director of Development, Bnos Bais Yaakov

Kesser Shem Tov Award: Dr. Akiva Bergman, Dinner Chairman; Mr. Yoily Edelstein, MC; Mr. Berish Fuchs presenting award; Mr. Shabse Fuchs, Kesser Shem Tov Awardee; Rabbi Yisroel Tepper, Director of Development, Bnos Bais Yaakov; Mr. Mel Zachter, Trustee, Bnos Bais Yaakov

Community Service Award: Rabbi Yaakov Bender, Rosh Hayeshiva, Yeshiva Darchei Torah; Dr. Akiva Bergman, Dinner Chairman; Mr. Joel Beritz and Mr. Jason Cury, Gruss Life Monument Funds, Community Service Awardees; Rabbi Yisroel Tepper, Director of Development, Bnos Bais Yaakov; Mr. Mel Zachter, Trustee, Bnos Bais Yaakov

Walking into The Sands at Atlantic Beach on Monday night, January 16, was a surreal experience. Outside it was frigid – the wind chill brought the temperature down to well below zero. Inside, visitors were assailed by spring-like conditions; flowers bloomed on every surface, place cards “grew” in small patches of neatly mown grass, dinner tables and presentation boards spouted the eye-catching BBY flower and even the mechitza was a magnificent display of flowers.

The theme of blooming and blossoming was so very appropriate. As the evening unfolded, the BBY story emerged through the voices of administrators, board members, parents, and children.

BBY is a nurturing place, an environment in which children are able to thrive and grow and indeed – bloom and blossom.

As the massive crowd of 1,000 guests enjoyed the sumptuous repast artfully laid out at the smorgasbord, they had the opportunity to mingle with friends. With reluctance, the crowd moved to the dinner tables. But reluctance turned quickly to delight. Rabbi Ephraim Shapiro, rav and world renowned speaker, opened the program with his impassioned words about the importance of empowering each and every girl with a love of Yiddishkeit and feelings of self-worth and belonging.

These feelings, asserted Rabbi Shapiro, will help a girl grow up into a strong and

the smooth running of Bnos Bais Yaakov.

Out of a sense of achrayus to the klal and to the girls of BBY, Mr. Bergman, Mr. Hirth, and Mr. Zachter turned their lives upside down and inside out to be available at all times and in all situations for BBY and its personnel. The applause for these gracious gentlemen was appropriately rousing.

And, finally, the guests of honor expressed hakaras hatov of their own. Mr. and Mrs. Shabse Fuchs, Kesser Shem Tov awardees, were fulsome in their praise for their children’s teachers and principals. Rabbi and Mrs. Moshe Bender, Parents of the Year, expressed their delight at the wholesomeness of the BBY environment and the superior academic program that it provides.

Mr. and Mrs. Fuchs are dedicated to the students of Be’er Hagolah, to easing the plight of singles, and to countless other tzedakos and causes. Typical of their way of operating, the Fuchses have used the shadchanus money they’ve received from so many grateful couples to write and donate numerous Sifrei Torah.

Rabbi and Mrs. Bender are respectively involved in Yeshiva Darchei Torah and Bnos Bais Yaakov. The bochurim in YDT know that they have a full-time, 24/7 mentor and friend in Rabbi Moshe Bender and BBY, quite simply, counts on Shainy Bender for her unusual levels of

secure woman capable of establishing a bayis ne’eman be’Yisroel. Rabbi Shapiro confirmed that from everything he’s seen and heard about BBY, it is exactly the kind of school that can engender those feelings in its talmidos. With his powerful presentation, Rabbi Shapiro validated the pride of all in attendance at belonging to such a worthy institution.

The presentations which followed were heartfelt, articulate, and laden with massive doses of hakaras hatov. Led by the M.C., Dr. Akiva Bergman, the program continued apace and the messages came through loudly and clearly. Hakaras hatov was expressed to so many deserving people: gratitude toward Mr. Jason Cury and Mr. Joel Beritz for their unstinting help in providing BBY with state-of-the-art academic equipment; appreciation to Mrs. Malka Fishman and Mrs. Leah Bachon for organizing the magnificent dinner; kudos to the members of the parent committee who volunteer massive amounts of time and energy to BBY; and a surprise tribute to Mr. Lloyd Keilson for his behind-thescenes efforts on behalf of BBY. Deserving the greatest thanks were the three members of the Board of Trustees – Mr. Sam Bergman, Mr. Moshe Hirth, and Mr. Mel Zachter. These gentlemen, all of whom have busy, productive lives of their own, assumed the responsibility for

efficiency and dedication. Both couples represent what Bnos Bais Yaakov holds dear – a beautiful melding of middos, chinuch, and chessed. BBY could not have honored better role models.

In a moving surprise presentation by the children of Mr. and Mrs. Berish Fuchs, the lobby of the BBY school building was dedicated in memory of Mrs. Hannah Fuchs’ mother, Mrs. Miriam Reinberg, great-grandmother to a lovely bunch of Edelstein, Fuchs, and Ostreicher BBY talmidos. As Mr. Edelstein mentioned during his presentation, it will be a zechus for the children to walk through the “Ohel Miriam” – certainly for the great-grandchildren, but for all the other BBY talmidos as well.

The video presentation was professionally rendered by Mr. Chananya Kramer of Kol Rom Studios. Aside from the usual expressions of delight at recognizing the face of a beloved daughter in the video, the audience greatly appreciated Mr. Kramer’s artistic portrayal of the “blossoming” theme. With petals and flowers strewn about on screen and a stunning visual demonstration of a budding flower, the idea hit home viscerally – BBY is a school in which girls grow and blossom, using the nutrients provided to maximize their potential in ruchnius and academics.

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Around The Community Purim Cards from Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya the poor, one emulates Hashem.” Purim cards are a simple way to spend more on tzedaka and less on mishloach manos.

Instead of sending your friends food packages, you can send them Tomchei Shabbos Purim cards and show that you care about them and also about the needy of our own neighborhood. Halachically, those who purchase cards are still obligated to send one package of food and two gifts to the poor on Purim day, but cards can help us to include everyone on our list while the food packages are re-directed to those who really need the help.

Every Thursday night of the year and every erev yom tov, a dedicated group of teenage girls busily pack food into boxes – all the ingredients of a tasty Shabbos meal. Under the cover of darkness, with the utmost discretion, volunteer drivers deliver those boxes to the doorsteps of carefully-screened recipients. Many of these people haven’t had a decent meal all week. They and their children look forward eagerly

Food for Shabbos is something many of us take for granted. But in these hard times, do you ever think about some of your neighbors – the man who sits two rows behind you in shul, the lady you carpool with on Sundays, the kid who sits next to yours in yeshiva? Over 250 families in our own neighborhood are unemployed, or alone, or elderly, struggling to make ends meet... What will they put on their Shabbos tables?

When Mordechai and Esther set up the mitzvos of Purim they included mishloach manos to bring achdus (unity) to the Jewish people. But as our social circles widen, the mishloach manos can get out of hand, leading to a lot of food that goes to waste right before Pesach. This year, make your theme “Care About Each Other” by sending your friends our attractive, newly-designed Purim cards.

It’s black and white in the Rambam: (2:17): “One should spend on matonos l’evyonim more than mishloach manos or the Purim seudah. By gladdening

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to the bit of oneg Shabbos this carton contains. Most importantly, when they see this package, they know they have neighbors who care about them.

It all started several years ago in a trailer. Despite the affluence for which our community is famous, some people in Far Rockaway and the Five Towns could not afford the basic staples necessary for Shabbos and yom tov. Packages of food were assembled by volunteers and sent out with volunteer drivers. As word of the program spread, it outgrew the trailer and several other locations and is currently based at the Torah Academy for Girls in Far Rockaway (TAG).

There are many Jewish neighborhoods which have Tomchei Shabbos programs, but Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya is the only organization providing food here in the Five Towns and Rockaways.

Today, Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya of the Five Towns and Rockaways, named in memory of Yeshaya Alpert, z”l, services more than 250 local families from our area – from elderly shut-ins and immigrants from the former Soviet Union to struggling families who live in Far Rockaway, Long Beach, Lawrence, Cedarhurst and Woodmere. Every Thursday night, even during school vacations, a group of TAG students assembles the packages.

Packages are grouped in different sizes to accommodate everyone from a senior living alone to a family with many children. A typical Shabbos package includes challah, grape juice, chicken, gefilte fish, eggs, cake, apples, potatoes, and juice. Cooked food is sent to those who are disabled and cannot prepare the food themselves. Sometimes food companies donate additional items, which are used to supplement the regular packages.

Packages are sent out every Thursday night for Shabbos and there are additional deliveries before every holiday. A catered meal is provided for the Purim seudah, and many cases of staples are delivered to each recipient family before Pesach.

The delivery routes are carefully planned to assure the kavod of the recipients. For example, Woodmere volunteer drivers deliver in Far Rockaway, while volunteers from Far Rockaway are sent to Lawrence and Cedarhurst.

The drivers generally do not know to whom they are delivering. The deliveries are done carefully, so as not to

embarrass anyone.

Each family which receives packages from Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya must be recommended by a sponsor, usually a local rabbi or community activist familiar with the case. The need is great – for many of the recipients, this is the only decent food they get to eat all week.

“Aniyei ircha kodmim” – the poor of our own neighborhood are a priority when it comes to allocating our tzedakah. You too can have a share in this enormous and vital mitzvah.

For more information or to make a contribution, please contact: Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya of the Five Towns and Rockaway 634 Oak Drive Far Rockaway, NY 11691 718-327-7283.

Our popular hostess, condolence, and gift cards announcing your donation to Tomchei Shabbos Yad Yeshaya can be ordered year-round from Mrs. Vivienne Frank at 718-327-3038.

Purim cards are available in convenient packages of 10, 36, 50 and 200 from the following locations: • Cedarhurst Edana Tuchman 516-791-0987 • Far Rockaway Sima Krischer 718-471-8974 • Lawrence Joy Paley 516-603-2531 • Woodmere Marilyn Blau516-295-1175 • Bayswater Judy Merlis 718-327-5294 • “Ohel Sara” Amen Group Vivienne Frank 718-327-3038

Send us your Purim photos! Be included in the TJH Purim photo album!

Email Editor@ FiveTownsJewishHome.com

39 THE JEWISH HOME 

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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41 THE JEWISH HOME 

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For more info or to apply: (855) 282-8273 or campareivim@gmail.com WWW.CAMPAREIVIM.COM

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Around The Community Five Towns Marriage Initiative Increasing our Joy In the month of Adar we are told that joy is increased, and in a similar fashion we are taught that during the month of Av, joy is decreased. In conjunction with the month of Av, our Shulchan Aruch has

numerous laws and instructions regarding specifically how to go about decreasing joy. In contrast, for Adar, there are no specific rules mentioned for how to increase our joy. In the past, joy was simple

and mourning was complicated. In our day, it seems like it’s so much easier to mourn than to be joyful.

Since we are advised to increase our joy, how can we go about doing this?

The English word “happy” resembles the English word “happens.” In the Hebrew, however, the word for happy, “samaech,” has a root of “sam” and “moach,” which

could be understood as “placing our mind to a given matter.” While we may think that “happiness” is a state of being, in truth happiness comes when we put our minds to those things that are conducive to happiness and in general to “work on happiness” – not merely to “wait for it.” Happiness is thus not an outgrowth of our circumstances but an outgrowth of our attitude.

One very holy Rebbitzen who had suffered greatly was once asked how she managed to maintain happiness with all the challenges and losses she had been through. Her reply was that if she already lost so much in life, did she also have to lose her happiness as well?

We can also increase our joy by working to change our expectations.

Many situations that cause frustration and resentment are only due to expectations we have created that can be unnecessarily unrealistic and sky-high. We need to learn to taper our expectations for all in life and be grateful and thrilled for anything and everything we do receive – and furthermore, to come to understand that no matter how minimal our sustenance, if we are still alive we have what to be grateful for that got us to this very point in time. Working on a recognition of good in all situations is critical to leading a life of true, intense joy.

Adar is a time when we work to increase our joy, but it does not always come naturally. We think of Pesach and we automatically think of all the work we will need to do to adequately prepare our homes and clean for chometz. Preparation for the joy in Adar in a sense may also take great effort to really do this justice, just as we learn that true happiness isn’t just waiting for circumstances to change, but to change our mindset that can then influence circumstances for the better.

Preparing for Adar and working to achieve great joy is truly something we can and should feel challenged by. By putting forth the greatest effort we can increase our joy. May we merit to become a better and happier spouse and learn to experience true happiness and great joy in not only this month but for all our lives.

Five Towns Marriage Initiative provides educational programs, workshops and referrals to top marriage therapists.

FTMI will help offset counseling costs when necessary and also runs an anonymous shalom bayis hotline for the entire community Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday evenings, 9:30-11p.m. For the hotline or more information, call 516-4305280 or email dsgarry@msn.com.

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Around The Community

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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On Rosh Chodesh Adar, the Preschool of Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island got into the spirit of Purim with face painting and cotton candy party. Mishenichnas Adar marbim b’simcha!

DRS Students & OHEL Day Hab Individuals Pack Mishloach Manos at the OHEL Gifts@Work Program Over 50 students from DRS high school recently joined men and women from the OHEL Bais Ezra Day Habilitation Program. Students and individuals with disabilities spent an enjoyable morning packaging several hundred mishloach manos as part of OHEL’s Gifts@Work Program.

This unique Gifts@Work program provides skill building, job training and a stipend for individuals with disabilities. Mishloach manos are packaged individually based on orders from community members who recognize that this is a “real” gift with “real” benefits to OHEL’s individuals and a great Purim package to share with family and friends.

The program offers a sense of dignity and accomplishment to OHEL’s individuals. It is a fun program that employs individuals with disabilities while at the same time allowing community members to visit the OHEL Day Hab Center, learn about OHEL’s programs, jointly package the mishloach manos and then purchase meaningful gifts for family and friends. Mishloach manos packages are filled with useful gifts such as a blanket, tumblers, and delicious cookies and nosh.

DRS, Investors Bank, Mutual of America and girls from Bergen County have all participated in packing mishloach manos. The DRS boys enjoyed working alongside OHEL individuals and they also led Day Hab participants in Tu B’Shvat games and songs. “It was a great way to learn about OHEL programs, interact with adults with disabilities and also have a great time. I’m glad to have met Yoni, Miriam, Danny and seen their Day Hab Program and work alongside them,” said Mordy, a senior at DRS. It was both a rewarding and bonding experience for all individuals involved.

For more information about OHEL’s Gifts at Work program, and to order your mishloach manos now, please visit www. ohelgiftsatwork.org.

Since 1969, OHEL Children’s Home and Family Services has served as a dependable haven of individual and family support, helping people of all ages effectively manage disability, surmount everyday challenges, heal from trauma, and manage with strength and dignity during times of crises.

45 THE JEWISH HOME 

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Around The Community

47

PHOTO CREDITS: IRA THOMAS CREATIONS

THE JEWISH HOME

Scenes from the Successful Annual Dinner of Torah Academy for Girls

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

TAG was grateful for the opportunity to recognize Mr. Menachem & Mrs. Aviva Kagan as the Hakaras Hatov Awardees at the dinner. Pictured, Rabbi Baruch Lovett, Director of Development; Rabbi Meyer Weitman, Dean; Mr. Menachem Kagan; Mr. Moishe Mishkowitz, Chairman of the Board; Mr. Yehuda Biber, Dinner Co-Chairman

It was indeed an honor to pay tribute to this year’s Guests of Honor, Mr. Shlomo and Mrs. Shevi Jacobowitz. Presenting the award, pictured left to right, Rabbi Baruch Lovett, Director of Development; Rabbi Meyer Weitman, Dean; and Mr. Shlomo Jacobowitz

The Rabbi Moshe Weitman Memorial Award was presented to the Mermelstein family in memory of Dr. Yaakov Mermelstein a”h. Pictured left to right: Rabbi Baruch Lovett, Director of Development; Mr. Pinky Friedman, Dinner Co-Chairman; Dr. Shamshy Eisenberger and Mr. Adrian Garbacz, sons- in- law of Dr. Mermelstein; Rabbi Meyer Weitman, Dean

Torah Academy for Girls felt privileged to honor Mrs. Mimi Shuter as the Educator of the Year. Accepting the award on her behalf was her husband, Rabbi Yisroel Shuter. Pictured left to right, Mr. Moishe Mishkowitz, Chairman of the Board (seated); Rabbi Baruch Lovett, Director of Development; Rabbi Yisroel Shuter; Dr. Shmuel Reisbaum, Executive Director; and Mr. Yehuda Biber, Dinner Co- Chairman

Congresswoman Kathleen Rice Speaks at SKA “How appropriate,” said Mrs. Helen Spirn, SKA’s Head of School, in her introduction, “to hear from such an important woman like Congresswoman Rice on Rosh Chodesh Adar, a month in which a woman played such an important role!”

The junior class of the Stella K. Abraham High School for Girls, all of whom are taking Government, was honored with a visit from Congresswoman Kathleen Rice on Thursday,

February 19. The charismatic Democratic Congresswoman, who represents the 4th Congressional District, spoke to the students about the role of women in government and policy-making decisions. This was her second visit to SKA; several years ago she addressed the sophomores and parents on substance abuse prevention in her position as District Attorney of Nassau County.

“There is nothing you can’t do,” Congresswoman Rice exhorted the

girls. In describing her childhood, she noted that her mother was her hero, always telling her she could do anything.

As District Attorney, she ran for Congress and took the seat away from an incumbent who had been in office for 30 years. She urged the girls to get politically active and stressed how important women’s votes are in elections.

A vocal supporter of Israel, Congresswoman Rice told the girls how crucial it is to make one’s voice known

in Washington and to let Americans know that Israel is their most important ally in the Middle East. She promised that she would be sitting in her seat when Prime Minister Netanyahu comes to address Congress about the dangers of Iran.

SKA’s 10th grade looks forward to visiting Congresswoman Rice in Washington on their lobbying trip in a few weeks.

SHALOM BAYIS HOTLINE

All calls completely anonymous-9:30pm-11pm S/T/TH Basic Problem solving/Referrals to local therapists

Call: 516 430 5280

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Around The Community Bnot Yaakov Blizzard Challenge While everyone’s been hiding out from the snow and away from school over the past several weeks, Mrs. Friedman, General Studies Principal, issued Bnot Yaakov students a special Blizzard Challenge: Read a book and hand in a “Hot Cocoa Story Summary” of the plot when we return from school – and receive a delicious cup of hot cocoa in return! Parents were emailed directions and story summary sheets and were encouraged to send in pictures of their daughters reading their books. Bnot Yaakov was inundated with beautiful pictures of girls snuggled up in the cold under afghans and blankets reading books! After students returned to school, the story summaries came pouring in and Mrs. Friedman kept on pouring hot cocoa in return.

The Blizzard Challenge was an exciting reading incentive that then mor-

phed into an “Ice Storm Challenge” when the next school cancellation day arrived. A week or so later, when the roads were deemed too “icy” for safe driving, Bnot Yaakov issued another “Ice Storm Challenge” that challenged students to pick one character from a book they were currently reading and write a character sketch describing the character. Bnot Yaakov girls loved the challenge, wrote interesting character sketches and enjoyed their hot cocoa rewards immensely! There’s nothing like books and hot cocoa to help cultivate a taste for literature!

HANC Welcomes Adar and Gets Ready for Purim In the spirit of “Mi’shenichnas Adar marbin b’simcha,” the students at HANC’s Samuel & Elizabeth Bass Golding Elementary School & Early Childhood Center welcomed the month of Adar with tremendous enthusiasm and simcha!

Students in kindergarten - 2nd grade had a wonderful time at a special program led by Sara Schonfeld called Musical Minds. The students learned all about different kinds of drums and how to create music by using different methods of hitting the drums. Third-sixth graders

had a fabulous Rosh Chodesh Chagiga filled with music and dancing led by music teacher Rabbi Shapiro. In fact, the room was filled with so much singing, dancing and fun that the walls and floors were shaking! Morah Jacobs and the fifth grade girls had a fantastic time showing off their crazy hats while they danced and sang their way through the classrooms!

Students at the ECC were treated to a huge Rosh Chodesh celebration with Oneg Shemesh. During the celebration, all the students received graggers and noisemakers and then enjoyed delicious hamentashen. The students at the ECC are also very busy getting ready for Purim. Students are learning about the megillah and dressing up to reenact the story of Purim. Students are also excited to be making their own megillot and graggers to use at shul.

Chodesh tov and Purim sameach to everyone!

Around The Community

49 THE JEWISH HOME 

FEBRUARY 26, 2015 On Sunday, the third of Adar, February 22, the preschool division of Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island held a father and son breakfast. The Menahel, Rabbi Krigsman, opened the event with a dvar Torah, followed by a very exciting and entertaining show about animals. The event ended with a spectacular raffle. Fathers and sons left in a happy and joyous mood ready to celebrate the coming of Purim.

The Gantza Megillah A milestone at the North Shore Hebrew Academy (NSHA) Middle School will be reached when 20 students, both Ashkenazic and Sephardic, will read Megillas Esther for their schoolmates and faculty on Purim day, which falls this year on a Thursday, March 5. Dr. Paul Brody, a dermatologist by profession, (standing 2nd from left, holding Megillah case) has instructed more than 225 students for the past 14 years, at the Academy, enabling them to read the Megillah at various synagogues, hospitals, nursing homes and private homes. Rabbi Adam Acobas (standing right) facilitates the students’

Teachers and students at Shulamith Lower School welcomed the new month of ADAR with laughter and joy, wearing funny hats in the spirit of Purim. Students were treated to “Laffy” Taffy candy and trinkets as gifts for Rosh Chodesh.

hectic schedules to enable adequate review time with Dr. Brody. The students have achieved a unique accomplishment, joining a small, qualified group who possess the knowledge to publicly chant the Megillah.

Dr. Brody, who has read the Megillah for over 40 years, once chanted it at the Great Synagogue in Leningrad in 1985 despite great peril, where the “gabboyim” were actually members of the KGB!

PHOTO CREDIT: NSHA PHOTO FILE

Otto the Auto Visits HAFTR Karen Blackburn from AAA came to visit HAFTR last week and taught the children some wonderful safety tips when traveling in a car. Ms. Blackburn and her friends, Bob the puppet and Otto the talking auto, explained to the children why it is unsafe to sit in the front seat and why they are too little to wear just a seatbelt. They also encouraged our youngsters to watch over their parents and grandparents and make sure they are buckled up safely too. The program included advice for the children on how to walk in a parking lot as well as many other pedestrian tips. The AAA representative confided that she does hundreds of presentations every year and she had never seen a better behaved audience of two-, three-, and four-year-olds. Here

at HAFTR’s Early Childhood Center, good middot and menschlechkeit infuse everything we do.

Around The Community Over 200 Gather for Landmark Conference to Discuss Risk, Trauma and Abuse in Jewish Community

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Zvi Bloom, Mendy Klein (Cleveland), Mendy Klein (Lawrence), Sol Werdiger, Moshe Wolfson, Zvi Gluck

220 participants from 102 organizations gathered last week in Newark, New Jersey, for a groundbreaking conference addressing some of the most sensitive topics affecting the Orthodox Jewish community: risk, trauma and abuse. The milestone event was hosted by Amudim and included 25 private practice clinicians as well as rabbis, educators, therapists, clinical directors, heads of major organizations, social workers, philanthropists and many others who spent two days analyzing these rarely discussed problems and formulating a five point strategy for tackling these complex issues head on.

“This was the first-ever conference of this type within the Orthodox Jewish community,” said Zvi Gluck, director of Amudim. “This was a collaborative effort

Moshe Frankel, R’ Ace Klatzko, Avrohom Kirzner, R’ Zvi Gluck, Zoe Kagan, Aviva Bennett-Tribuch

as well as possible impediments to those here and participated have left here with Including a variety people of different solutions, and devised a set of protocols an increased positive feeling that together backgrounds was one of the keys to the that would allow them to effectively and everyone can make a difference, that there conference’s success, according to Debbie practically achieve those objectives. While is support out there for their efforts,” said Fox of Magen Yeladim Child Safety Instieach of the four groups worked individu- Mrs. Friedberg. “They are doing the diffi- tute and founder and creator of the Safety ally, in different rooms, all came up Kid program. with a set of similar goals which were “I think the real strength is then boiled down into five distinct that this is multi-disciplinary strategies: centralizing information so there seems to be lots of difand access to resources, creating grass ferent types of organizations roots efforts to change the status quo, that are all working with the developing evidenced based support same theme of helping kids,” services, engaging rabbanim, edusaid Mrs. Fox. “It means that cators and parents to promote child you all learn to work together safety and creating funding strategies. and you learn what the gaps Numerous participants volunteered to are, which is very important.” begin taking leadership roles in imShedding light on sensiGuest speaker, Dr. David Pelcovitz Director of Amudim, Rabbi Zvi plementing the strategies identified Gluck tive topics that for years have during the two day conference. been kept in the shadows is “It is incredible to re- cult groundwork, but if we work together crucial, explained David Mandel, CEO of alize that 220 people from we can change paradigms.”

Ohel’s Children and Family Services. different backgrounds in Participants were inspired by divrei “It means that additional victims will this industry all came up Torah from Rabbi YY Jacobson, Rab- come out and seek support,” said Mandel. with the same common bi Zecharia Wallerstein and Rabbi Elya “It means that they feel that they will be denominators, making it Brudny, rosh yeshiva of the Mir Yeshiva empathized with. It means that it will give obvious that we are past in Brooklyn, who spoke about the im- them strength about not feeling that they the point where there are pact of saving even one individual. Rabbi were ruined or tainted and they can’t get a just one or two people Brudny observed that a single Auschwitz shidduch and it will strengthen other peosaying there is a problem,” survivor could today have well over 200 ple to do this work.” said Gluck. “Change is in descendants, highlighting the importance “I see an amazing movement in movthe air and the momentum of helping each and every child in need. ing forward and empowering parents, is clearly visible, with “Each one is a bais hamikdash, a rabbonim and the community to protect Eitan Kobre, R’ Benzion Twersky, R’ Ezra Max, and R’ Yaakov Horowitz people already discussing world,” said Rabbi Brudny. our children,” added Ruchama Clapman, by many people and many organizations which areas of this new initiative they plan Dr. David Pelcovitz noted that the founder and executive director of MASK. and is just the beginning of what will be to be involved in.” simple act of gathering a large number of “We waited so many years and we’ve an all-out effort to effect crucial changes A key component of dramatic change people who deal with the issues of trauma, seen so many cases over the years, not to benefit our precious children.” was also put into play at the Amudim con- risk and abuse for a conference of this na- hundreds, but thousands and we can say The statistics for both abuse cases and ference with the announcement of a $1 ture was an empowering experience that are going to be able to, as a result of this drug overdoses in the Jewish community million fund to treat abuse victims, creat- has the potential to be a catalyst for pos- conference, get so much help in so many different ways just by us getting together, are staggering, with dozens of known ed by philanthropists Mendy Klein, Nan- itive change. cases reported since Rosh Hashana and cy Friedberg and others. The new fund is “You get the sense of togetherness, the networking and coming up with special over three dozen deaths of people under an initiative of ASAP (www.ASAP.care) sense of standing at each other’s side and policies which will give support to parage 35 in the Jewish community in that and provides therapy to Orthodox Jew- that feeling of support gave us the ability ents and empower victims to be able to get same time period, underscoring the need ish abuse victims who live in the tri-state to take what is really a seemingly insur- help, get the therapy they need and be able for serious and immediate intervention. area through qualifying non-profit organi- mountable problem and break it down into to then move on to lead healthy lives.”

The workshop-based event divided par- zations and is hopefully the first of many small, doable pieces, which to me creates To find out more about Amudim, visit ticipants into four separate groups, each more programs dedicated to treating abuse a workable reality,” said Dr. Pelcovitz. “It crystallized our thinking in terms of very them online at www.amudim.org or conof which identified both short term goals in the Jewish community. to help those who have been victimized, “I’m hoping that the people who are specific goals.” tact them at 646-517-0222.

51

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At Kollel Tirtza Devorah, a select group of Yeshiva Darchei Torah alumni engages

in intensive Torah study from morning until late at night. They complement their focus on advanced Gemara and Halacha by teaching, mentoring and training for careers in communal leadership. The Kollel's graduates have become rabbeim, teachers and mashgichim in our local community and beyond. They are the future leaders of Klal Yisrael.

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Motzaei Shabbos, March 21, 2015 ”   9:15pm At Yeshiva Darchei Torah 257 Beach 17th Street Far Rockaway, NY 11691 For Dinner reservations and journal ads , please call 718.868.2300 ext. 237 or email kollel@darchei.org

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Around The Community Joel Shiff Delegates from Rambam Head to AIPAC Rambam Mesivta has always considered political activism and support for Israel as part of its educational philosophy. Students are exposed to various rallies, assemblies, speakers and Israel chesed and advocacy projects on an ongoing basis. Rambam students have learned that they truly can make a

difference.

Next week, 12 students from Rambam will embark on a trip to Washington, D.C., to be part of the AIPAC conference. The delegates, Zach Beer, Ezra Cinamon, Johnathan Deutsch, Evan Edelstein, Ephraim Fruchter, Yoni Nirenberg, Yoni Meiri, Zechariah Rosenthal, Josh Saltzman, Avraham Sosnowik and Yossi Zimilover, are students in Rabbi Eliach’s Religious Zionism class.

Their mission is dedicated to the memory of Joel Shiff, z”l, an outspoken advocate on behalf of Israel and ardent supporter of AIPAC. Rabbi Friedman’s relationship with the Shiff family goes back many years.

It began when he taught their son, Jonathan, and continued years later when Mrs. Jane Shiff taught AP Biology in Rambam. Joel was a well-known leader in the Five Towns community and served as the President of Congregation Beth Sholom, the very same congregation that hosted his bar mitzvah and his wedding to his wife, Jane.

“Having such a large group participate in AIPAC and paying tribute to Joel Shiff, a community leader and staunch supporter of Israel, will certainly inspire our students and enable them to realize what one man accomplished and how they can follow in his footsteps. This trip will build on the foundations of preparing them to be the Jewish leaders of tomorrow, and I look forward to being with them next week in Washington,” said Rabbi Friedman.

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Around The Community Hachnasat Sefer Torah at Rambam

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Snow? What snow! The weather this past Sunday could not keep hundreds of Rambam talmidim and their Rebbeim from dancing in the streets to welcome a new Sefer Torah to Rambam.

Dedicated by Michael and Susan Sosnowik and family on the 50th Yahrzeit of Dora Sosnowik z”l, the procession started at the Young Israel of Lawrence Cedarhurst and made its way to Rambam.

It was led by members of the Sosnow-

ik family, friends of the family, Rabbi Moshe Teitelbaum, and Rabbi Zev Meir Friedman and the Rambam mishpacha.

Rambam junior Avraham Sosnowik was at the head of the procession and was joyously partaking in the dancing. Not 24 hours later, he was receiving an aliyah while holding the new Sefer Torah, secure in the knowledge that his grandmother’s legacy would continue to give back “mi’dor la’dor.”

Seventh Annual Mother-Daughter Dinner This past Monday, February 23, marked the seventh annual Midreshet Shalhevet mother-daughter dinner.

The ballroom overflowed as both current and prospective students and their mothers joined together for a wonderful night out. The evening began with cupcake decorating by Shalhevet parent Mrs. Tsippy Nussbaum, who demonstrated how to design and present exquisite pastries. Mothers and daughters had a blast as they bedecked the cupcakes with assorted toppings.

Shortly thereafter, everyone was treated to a delicious buffet from Carlos and Gabby’s before sitting down to hear the amazing Shalhevet choir perform. The choir, led by Mrs. Andrea Schulman, consisted of students from ninth through twelfth grade, impressed the audience with their beautiful melodies and flawless harmonies. Eleventh grader Shoshi Koppel astounded the crowd with her unbelievable solo and piano skills. Following their amazing performance, Principal Mrs. Esther

Mrs. Sara Miller with daughter, Leah, a ninth grader at Shalhevet

Eisenman took the floor to share some insight on Megillat Esther with an interactive shiur.

Mothers and daughters continued to mingle over dessert featuring a gourmet Viennese table by Shalhevet parent Ms. Chani Gold. It was a great event and Shalhevet is truly proud to partner with such a committed parent body in educating our talmidot.

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Around The Community

59 THE JEWISH HOME

Bais Medrash Mayan Hatorah Tenth Anniversary Dinner

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Rabbi Jurkowitz receiving the Kesser Torah award

Simply Tsfat Returns to MAY On Wednesday, Erev Rosh Chodesh Adar, Mesivta Ateres Yaakov ushered in Chodesh Adar by hosting Simply Tsfat, three Breslov chassidim from the mystical city of Tsfat who spread joy and inspiration around the world through story, song and dance.

At MAY, SImply Tsfat’s visits are a highly anticipated event, and the talmidim were eager to participate in the annual kumzits/concert. Simply Tsfat did not disappoint! After a moving kumzits replete with original niggunim and inspirational stories, talmidim took to the floor for “ground-shaking,” leibidik danc-

ing. Rabbeim together with their talmidim shook the walls of the Mesivta in an inspiring introduction to Chodesh Adar.

“Mesivta Ateres Yaakov talmidim are a super audience who help us really make ruchniyus rock,” the band commented. In fact, Simply Tsfat returned to MAY the next evening for an exclusive mishmar/ kumzits for the senior class, another electrifying event that concluded well past midnight.

Rabbi Newman, Rosh Yeshiva, receiving an award for a decade of chinuch

YU Apps Win Digital Marketing Awards

For the second year in a row, two of Yeshiva University’s mobile applications have been recognized as winners in the Higher Education Marketing Report’s 2014 Education Digital Marketing Awards. Created for the iPad, “Cardozo Life” and “This is Yeshiva University” each won the gold award for Mobile Media.

“Our unique story is what makes winning these awards possible—and we want to tell this story in every meTo hear portions of the event, visit the dium—print, digital, mobile,” said Judy Mesivta’s website at www.ateresyaakov. Tashji, creative director in YU’s office of Communications and Public Affairs. com.

“The next version of ‘This Is Yeshiva University’ for the iPad is being developed now. The awards certainly give us a sense of accomplishment and the inspiration to keep making these experiences better and better.”

“This Is Yeshiva University” offers a concise, visual overview of the school.

Users can tour YU’s undergraduate and graduate schools, learn about the university’s history and the exciting activities taking place on campus. From interactive maps to videos and photo galleries, users can get acquainted with YU through this innovative publication.

“Cardozo Life,” the magazine of YU’s Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law, reports on the school’s activities, faculty and alumni, and includes interviews, articles and insights about current issues and compelling legal topics. Users can scroll stories, watch videos and share information to connect to Cardozo in a full interactive experience.

The apps are free and are available for download on Android or Apple devices.

R’ Avrohom Sebrow presented the melachos of mechaba and ma’avier at this week’s Learn and Live Program. The boys got to experience some really cool stuff with fire (under supervision of course!) like lighting a trick candle that couldn’t be blown out and using sparklers. The boys were mesmerized throughout the presentation.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Mr. Menash Ortaz being presented with an award

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Around The Community The boys in the 6-8 grade classes of Yeshiva Ketana of Long Island had the zechus and pleasure to hear from Rabbi Nosson Greenberg, Rav of Khal Machzikei Torah and Rebbi in Yeshiva of Far Rockaway, on Rosh Chodesh Adar. Rabbi Greenberg wove together an interesting speech about the topic of simcha and how to have more simcha in our daily lives. The boys left the speech with a tangible understanding and deeper appreciation of the month of Adar.

And The Award Goes To… And the Borough Excellence Award for Queens goes to…The JCCRP! Congratulations!

With great honor, on February 11, 2015, the JCCRP accepted the award from the Food Bank of New York City for the best food pantry for the needy in all of the Queens Borough. This is quite a distinguished award as there are over 600 food pantries in the New York City area. The award was presented at the New York Marriot Marquis Times Square at the 23rd Annual New York City Conference on Hunger and Poverty, bringing together leaders from the anti-hunger community, media and policymakers, New York City government, supporters and funders to look back at the last year of progress and move forward to close the Meal Gap. “As a Food Bank member since 2002, JCCRP was chosen for their resiliency and unwavering support shown to a community devastated by Hurricane Sandy,” stated Dr. Camesha Grant, Sr. Director for Member Services at Food Bank for New York City. They are an embodiment of their mission statement, which is to aid in meeting the needs of the impoverished members of the Rockaway Community by determining the nature and extent

of their basic needs and methods of JCCRP is able to further service meeting those needs. In this capactheir food pantry clients by conity, they have made 144 referrals necting and referring them to more for services and have received 164 social services they may need and referrals from neighboring sites in benefit from. Being that they are their community for the services an all-in-one social servicing they offer. The pantry distributes agency, they have vast knowledge food two days a week and is totally and access to a multitude of social run by volunteers from the comwelfare programs which include a munity. Prior to Sandy, they averClient Choice Kosher Pantry, Caaged 800 people monthly and since reer Counseling, Financial Counthen, they average closer to 2,000 seling, Housing & Tenant/Landserved monthly. lord Mediation, Legal Assistance, After Hurricane Sandy, Food Medical Insurance Enrollment, Bank NYC gave the JCCRP a SNAP Enrollment and serve as a $25,000 grant, the “Food Bank Far Rockaway Submission Site Capacity Grant,” which was in- Nathan Krasnovsky, Executive Director, JCCRP & JSC, receiving for benefits, to name a few. Many Serstrumental in helping them reno- the award and Dr. Camesha Grant, Sr. Director for Member of the JCCRP’s clients that come rd vices at Food Bank NYC, presenting the award at the 23 Annual vate their pantry and turning it into New York City Conference on Hunger and Poverty into their food pantry may be in an essential part of servicing this need of one or more of these ascommunity and its people in need. Ad- shelves and choose which food items sistance programs, and with the help ditionally, Food Bank NYC is one of they would like to take, mimicking real of the Food Bank NYC and the TEN the JCCRP’s largest and most generous shopping experiences in supermarkets, Tracker system, they are able to propsuppliers of food each month, enabling giving the clients the dignity of choos- erly guide these clients in the right dithem to provide to countless numbers ing the grocery items that they would rection and get them services they need of clients monthly. And with today’s like to bring home for their families. to thrive. rising costs, making ends meet can be Food Bank for New York City has more than a little challenging, partic- been the city’s major hunger-relief The JCCRP continues to service ularly when it comes to grocery shop- organization working to end hunger the community thanks to the ongoing ping. That’s why the JCCRP’s food throughout the five boroughs for more support of the UJA-Federation of New pantry mirrors that of a supermarket than 30 years. Nearly one in five New York. The JCCRP is a proud benefiso that clients can browse the pantry Yorkers relies on Food Bank for food ciary agency of UJA Federation of and other resources. Food Bank takes NY. The JCCRP provides a range of a strategic, multifaceted approach that services for any clients who need asprovides meals and builds capacity in sistance in social services or resource the neediest communities, while rais- directing within the community. Please ing awareness and engagement among contact them for further information; all New Yorkers. Through its net- they are located at 1525 Central Avwork of more than 1,000 charities and enue (entrance on Foam Place), Far schools citywide, Food Bank provides Rockaway, NY, 11691— Call the JCfood for more than 63 million free CRP at (718) 327-7755—or visit them meals for New Yorkers in need. on the web at www.jccrp.org.

Editor@FiveTownsJewishHome.com With the help of the Food Bank NYC and the TEN Tracker system, the

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61 THE JEWISH HOME

Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam Celebrates Third Annual Dinner

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Mr. Eugene Gluck, Rabbi Nosson Neuman and Rabbi Moshe Neuman

Reb Yitzy Fried, Dinner Chairman

Rabbi Nosson Neuman, Menahel

Snow and ice notwithstanding, Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam celebrated its Third Annual Dinner this past Motzei Shabbos, Parshas Terumah. Held at Congregation Beth Shalom in Lawrence, the standing room-only crowd of over 300 people gathered to pay tribute to this growing institution of chinuch habanos and to celebrate its achievements thus far.

Starting with 31 girls to having 200

Mr. Eugene Gluck, Rabbi Neuman, Pinny Farkas, Kesser Shem Tov Awardee, and R’ Zvi Bloom

Rabbi Tuvia Negreann accepting the Chinuch Award on behalf of his wife, Morah Tehila Negreann

Rabbi Nosson Neuman and R’ Zvi Bloom presenting Reb Bumie Fried with the Guest of Honor Award

registered for the upcoming year, Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam has emerged as a school of choice for Torahdike families seeking a Bais Yaakov education with its now famous brand of genuine varmkheit.

This year’s honorees were Bumi and Tova Fried as Guests of Honor; Pinny and Yael Farkas with the Kesser Shem Tov award; and Morah Tehila Negreann – beloved nursery teacher at Bais Yaa-

kov Ateres Miriam – with the Chinuch Award. Rabbi Yaakov Bender, Rosh HaYeshiva of Yeshiva Darchei Torah and close friend of Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam, also delivered divrei bracha for the event.

With much enthusiasm, Rabbi Nosson Neuman, Menahel of Bais Yaakov Ateres Miriam, noted during the program of the incredible sense of purpose and responsibility the parents have to-

them for first grade and beyond. Every partnership is given specific differentiated math games on their level that reinforce big ideas that are central to the learning of mathematics. Each pair of students has its very own math drawer filled with gameboards and pieces needed for their carefully selected math games.

Bear Tracks and Build a City are games that partners play to reinforce their understanding of one to one correspondence and cardinality. Children play Racing Dots to help them “con-

serve and subitize.” As children master the big ideas, they move up the tiers to more difficult games, such as Collect 10, Sums of 5, and Toss the Chips.

These games encourage children to “count on, count back, part – whole relationships, and doubles.”

This is a far cry from the traditional workbook/worksheet model. Research shows that young children learn best through concrete and meaningful hands-on experiences. The opportunity to work on these math games provides children with a solid foundation from

wards the school. He expressed his hakoras hatov to them for their involvement and encouragement, for it is they who play a crucial role in their child’s accomplishments.

The dinner was a resounding success and an enjoyable time was had by all. Guests left with a true simcha and desire to continue to take part in the school’s future.

Preschool Matters 3?”

“Do you agree that 9 is more than

“Let’s figure out how many the two dice make all together by counting on!”

“I know there are 8 because there are only 2 empty boxes in the ten frame!”

These are examples of the delightful conversations wafting through the halls of Bais Yaakov of Queens as Pre 1-A children work on their math skills.

Each young mathematician is paired up with a math partner to work on important foundational skills that will prepare

which they can build an understanding of abstract mathematical ideas as they advance in the grades.

And everyone loves to play games!

Around The Community MAY Ski and Paintball Trip – Torah and Recreation Extraordinaire

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On Thursday, February 12, Mesivta Ateres Yaakov held their annual mid-winter ski, snowboard and paintball trip for the entire yeshiva.

Organized by Student Activities Coordinators, Rabbi Shlomo Drebin and Rabbi Tsvi Greenfield, the 190 talmidim, together with their Rabbeim spent the day at Mountain Creek Ski Resort and Long Live Paintball and finished

the day with a New Jersey Dougies’ catered dinner and a special siyum on Seder Mo’ed.

The admirable behavior of the talmidim on the trip was baruch Hashem a huge kiddush Hashem and made their Rabbeim very proud. However, the biggest kiddush Hashem was the unique Mishnayos learning program established a number of years ago by

ninth grade rebbe, Rabbi Shmuel Oratz.

The entire Seder Mo’ed was divided up among the talmidim of the yeshiva to learn at some point over the trip with the goal of making a siyum that evening on the limud. Many boys opted to spend the time on the bus learning together with a chavrusa, while others spent some time in the lodge when they weren’t on the slopes. The siyum that

Jewish Music Star Lipa Schmeltzer Rocks Rambam

Surprise! Rambam Rebbe, Rabbi Ari Boiangiu, himself a superstar guitarist, calmly stood at the podium and announced to the assembled students at Rambam that their next guest speaker was a PhD candidate at Columbia University, a learner, a worker, a person engaged in chessed, in short: a Rambam Man! With that, Lipa Schmeltzer

emerged and was greeted with howls of joy from the eager audience!

Rosh Mesivta, Rabbi Zev Meir Friedman, presented Lipa with a plaque recognizing him with the “Sameach Tesamach Award,” for bringing joy, inspiration, and simcha to klal Yisrael.

Lipa then proceeded to rock the house, jumping into the crowd, and singing—

sometimes even inserting words about Rambam into his songs!

After the chagigah, Rambam talmidim were treated to another surprise: cholent and kugel thanks to the generosity of the Yizhaky family! Rambam: Where anything can happen!

day was dedicated l’ilui nishmas Rabbi Drebin’s son, Baruch Tzvi Hersh ben Shlomo Pinchas, who was recently niftar at a very young age – a fact that encouraged every talmid to participate with great enthusiasm.

Following Shacharis, the day began with a schmooze from ninth grade rebbe, Rabbi Avi Schulman, who highlighted the importance of striving for great heights in Torah, rising to the “top of the mountain,” and inspired the talmidim to utilize their downtimes for learning throughout the trip. As a reward for winning the school-wide Yediyos Chanukah competition at the Yeshiva’s Chanukah Mesibah, the entire 12th grade enjoyed a gala free breakfast.

Talmidim were joined by Rebbeim on the slopes, skiing and snowboarding throughout the afternoon. With only a break for lunch, Mincha and learning, the bulk of the afternoon was action-packed!

The day’s events closed with a delicious Dougie’s dinner at the Moriah School in Englewood, NJ, and included the siyum on Seder Mo’ed, divrei Torah, a siyum on Masechtas Yevomos by the Menahel, Rabbi Mordechai Yaffe, and a digital slideshow of picture from the day’s events.

“The trip served many purposes,” commented Assistant Menahel, Rabbi Yossi Bennett. “It helped the talmidim and Rabbeim recharge their batteries during a long winter z’man; it was an opportunity to concretize relationships with friends and Rebbeim outside of the yeshiva’s walls, and it was a chance to apply the growth and learning in which our talmidim engage in on a daily basis in a real world situation.”

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

CALIFORNIA ROAST

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119

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2/$4

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THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

68

Mayor Martin and Reva Oliner of Lawrence meeting with seminary students in Israel last week

Achiezer’s Annual Gala: We are All Achiezer While our Far Rockaway and Five Towns community has come to regard Achiezer as their anchor and go-to resource, something exceptional has occurred. The lines have blurred in the most beautiful way possible; Achiezer— the name that says it all—has become an all-encompassing organization.

Not as an organization, but as a people. Every one of us has become Achiezer.

Over the past six years, Achiezer has grown into the very essence of its name.

Achiezer has become the heart of our community and in turn, you—our dear friend and neighbor—are the very heartbeat. Be it volunteer or client, concerned neighbor or professional, each of you is connected to Achiezer and each of you is Achiezer.

In just under two weeks, Achiezer will be hosting its 3rd Annual Gala, a momentous occasion where the community will pay tribute to our honorees, exemplary individuals who each embody Achiezer in their own right. None is just a name—each Honoree is a true partner and contributor to the success of what we have all come to know as Achiezer; they are each Achiezer at its greatest.

Yoeli and Toby Steinberg is a couple whose chesed permeates both their professional and home life; the chesed of dignity and humility, of doing not what is easy, but what is right. They have passed this trait on as their children carry the mantle forward to the next generation. Their combined love for our community is Achiezer.

As volunteers, Machi and Yanki Muller have become the stronghold through which Achiezer can care for our community on an individual basis.

Be it a ride or a hot meal, organizational skills, a visit to a lonely person, Machi and Yanki are always available with a smile, spreading the warmth through our community. The warmth that is Achiezer.

Sruly and Miri Miller embody community responsibility. Sruly has literally pushed off his schooling to accommodate the growing needs of our community’s insurance enrollment. Miri herself sat at Sruly’s side throughout the days following Hurricane Sandy fielding phone call after phone call, assisting countless individuals. “Hello, this is Achiezer,” and indeed, she was.

Yonina and Dovi Wisnicki personify selflessness at its best. Though most of us would say no thank you to a job description of full-time work and no pay, Yonina jumped at the chance. Yonina’s timely entry as the Affordable Care Act came into effect personifies the very center from which Achiezer operates.

Dovi and Yonina are a couple who are there at those most crucial moments, and that is Achiezer.

For Dr. Steven Jack Schneider, work and chesed have become synonymous: what better job than to heal the sick in body and spirit? Dr. Schneider’s unique expertise saves lives; and even more, he has made himself available to Achiezer at all hours. Dr. Schneider’s expertise and timeliness, coupled with his concern for every patient, is Achiezer.

Even with the hundreds of calls received each month, by utilizing our broad and diverse volunteer network, Achiezer continues to operate below the expected budget for an organization of its size. Achiezer continues to meet and collaborate with our community’s wide range of organizations.

Never has our community been banded together this strong.

On Sunday, March 8, 2015, Achiezer will be hosting its one and only fundraiser for the entire year. Your presence will be testament to what we have accomplished, together. We want you to be there – because you are Achiezer; because Achiezer belongs to all of us; and because Achiezer is a mindset that propels caring people to action.

69 THE JEWISH HOME 

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Op-Ed

71

Why I am Going to Copenhagen

THE JEWISH HOME

Rabbi Gedaliah Oppen

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Purim is almost upon us. If we ask ourselves, what was the turning point of the narrative in Megilat Esther, we would find the crucial moment was when Esther commanded Mordechai, “Lech knos es kol haYehudim - Go and gather all of the Jews.” To understand

Hashem bestows His shechina upon us and saves us from the wicked.

Jordan Hiller’s mission has reminded me that we must stand together with our brothers and sisters and assert to the world that we all stand united as one people.

The loss of Dan Uzan and the pain and suffering of the citizens of Copenhagen is our loss, pain and suffering as well. why this was the focal point of the drama, we must recall that when the wicked Haman sought permission from King Achashveirosh to massacre the Jews, he noted, “Yeshno am echad mefuzar u’mefurad bein ha’mim - There is one nation which is scattered and separated amongst all the other nations.”

Haman recognized that when the Jewish nation is scattered and separated we become vulnerable and an easy target for all the Hamans throughout the generations.

When we stand united as one, however, when we feel the pain of others, when we demonstrate through word and deed that no Jew is alone and that we are there for one another, then we can confront and successfully challenge all those who wish to destroy us. When Hashem sees that we are b’achdut, when we stand together just as at Mount Sinai, then

The loss of Dan Uzan and the pain and suffering of the citizens of Copenhagen is our loss, pain and suffering as well. The saddened Bat Mitzvah girl, Hannah, and her brokenhearted family, who must live with the memories of her shattered Bat Mitzvah, must rely on us to glue back together those broken pieces. I am bringing with me Bat Mitzvah gifts and letters of mazel tov and encouragement from my students

at HAFTR High School. The members of the mission also plan to extend personal condolences and deliver letters of nechama during our shiva visit to the Uzan family.

As I write this article, I am seeing the snow falling and I think of how each snowflake falls as an individual, yet, when those singular snowflakes join together they become so powerful that they can shut down roads, cause airports to close and in so many ways demonstrate the power of Hashem over His world, our world. Maybe, just maybe, the fact that we have had unpredicted and unprecedented amounts of snow this year, not just here in the United States, but across the globe, may be a message from Hashem that no matter what differences we may have, no matter that no two snowflakes are alike, we must unite not to create a storm but to withstand a storm.

B’ezrat Hashem, just as in Megilat Esther we united and thus merited to be saved from the devastating plot of Haman, so too, may we all unite and thus be zoche to the day when Moshiach Tzedkienu will arrive and bring us as one to the city of Shalom, the City of Peace, with the building of the Bais Hamikdash.

Rabbi Gedaliah Oppen is the principal of Judaic Studies at Hebrew Academy of the Five Towns and Rockaways.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

O

n February 14, Dan Uzan Hy”D, a 37-year-old Jewish volunteer security guard, was murdered in cold blood by an Islamic terrorist as he was protecting the synagogue in which the bat mitzvah of Hannah Ben Tov was being celebrated.

Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt, who attended Dan Uzan’s funeral, proclaimed, “An attack on the Jews of Denmark is an attack on Denmark.”

I believe we should all be declaring clearly, emphatically and loudly that “an attack on any Jew, no matter where he or she is; whether in Israel, the United States, Paris, Denmark, or any place in the world, is an attack on all Jews and every Jew.” When Mr. Jordan Hiller, a former HAFTR student of mine, advised Mrs. Leslie Gang, HAFTR’s Director of Admissions and Communications, that he was organizing a “Chizuk Mission,” a mission to strengthen and encourage the Jews of Copenhagen, I could not help but offer to participate. In announcing the mission, Jordan quoted the Bat Mitzvah girl, Hannah Ben Tov, her day of joy transformed into a tragedy, saying, “I wish I didn’t have a Bat Mitzvah…” Who can blame her for feeling vulnerable, alone and abandoned? Yet we cannot let this be the case! “Kol Yisroel araivim zeh l’zeh - We are all responsible for the wellbeing of one another.”

When I mentioned the mission to my wife, Yehudis, her reaction was immediate.

“How can you not go? There are people b’tzaar, people who are in pain, people who need to know that we are with them.”

The idea was also enthusiastically endorsed by my colleague, Ms. Naomi Lippman, Principal of HAFTR General Studies, and Executive Director Mr. Ruben Maron who insisted, “A mitzvah like this? For sure you should go.”

Torah Thought

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

72

Rabbi Berel Wein

Parshas Tetzaveh

I

f clothes make the man, the garments of the ordinary priests and the High Priest of Israel certainly grant them the authority and holiness of their offices. One of the major disqualifications that affected the priest’s ability to perform services in the Temple was that he lacked the proper clothing that characterized and identified him. We find generally in Jewish life that clothing plays an important societal and religious role.

Modesty in dress, special clothing for the Sabbath and holidays, and acceptable attire have always been the norms in Jewish society. The clothing of Jews was always affected by the influence of the countries and societies that they lived in. One need only look at the paintings of the Dutch masters of the seventeenth century portraying the Jews and rabbis of Amsterdam at their synagogue services and homes in order to realize how acculturated Jewish dress was, even amongst the most rigorously pious rabbis of the time.

The Church sought to regulate the colors of dress that Jews would be al-

lowed to wear in the Middle Ages. It was the Church that made black the main color motif of Jewish dress. It seems that the Jews in Europe before the time of the Crusades wore brightly colored clothing as did their non-Jewish neighbors. It was

of the Church and the abolition of such degrees (though they were restored by the Germans in World War II) Jews continued to wear informal peasant dress, strange hats and caps and mainly black clothing. The rule regarding all clothing

Before one could don the garments of majesty, power, grandeur and importance, one had to first learn the lessons of humility, holiness, purity and service to others and to G-d. only after the official medieval persecution of Ashkenazic Jews by the Church that restrictions were made on the color and type of clothing that could be worn

by Jews.

Jews were also forced to wear ludicrous looking hats and badges of shame on their clothing. However, Jews made their forced shameful clothing items of Jewish pride and long after the decline

was that it be modest and presentable.

The garments of the High Priest of Israel were ornate, unique and very luxurious in manufacture and appearance.

In contrast, the garments of the ordinary priests of Israel were simple, sparse and sparkling white. If the garments of the High Priest represented majesty, grandeur and power of leadership, the garments of the ordinary priests represented

holiness and service.

Not everyone could aspire to achieve majesty and grandeur – there was only one High Priest present at any one given time during the periods of the First and Second Temples. However purity of life and devotion to service of G-d and of Israel was something that many could achieve. This truth was reflected in the different clothing of the High Priest and of his fellow, but ordinary, priests.

It is to be noted that the High Priest himself also always wore the vestments of the ordinary priests. He had four additional garments that he wore that were of precious metal and fabric and unique to him. But before one could don the garments of majesty, power, grandeur and importance, one had to first learn the lessons of humility, holiness, purity and service to others and to G-d as represented by the clothing of the ordinary priests of Israel. Though we no longer have priestly vestments present in our Jewish society today, the lessons that they taught us should be remembered and followed.

Shabbat shalom.

The Shmuz

73

Parshas Tetzaveh

A Diamond with a Flaw

Every Diamond has a Flaw The answer to this is based on an issue of perspective.

Imagine that there are two large diamonds in front of you: one a beautifully cut jewel with a minor flaw, and the other the same as the first, but flawless – a perfect diamond. If we were to ask a diamond expert to appraise the two, there is no doubt that he would tell us that the difference between them is huge. He would say that the diamond with the

be like for me in the World to Come?

I’ve done many good things in my life, but I’m no tzaddik. I’ve also done plenty wrong, and I can’t even say that I did teshuvah for everything.”

“For eternity, I will be exactly what I made myself into. So what kind of Olam Habbah am I going to have? Forever I will walk around with my faults permanently part of me. How will I ever enjoy eternity when I am sullied?”

Man has to be tempted to choose either good or bad and be given the ability to make mistakes. in the realm of the malachim. A malach will spend its entire existence without sin. Malachim are perfect. But malachim aren’t man. Man and man alone was given the unique opportunity in all of Creation: to determine his destiny, either becoming the greatest of all, or sinking below the animals.

To allow man to create who he would be for eternity, Hashem gave him free will. However, free will doesn’t mean the theoretical ability to choose; it means being put into situations where either choice is viable and either option is real. Man has to be challenged. To allow for that, man has to be tempted to choose either good or bad and be given the ability to make mistakes. Every man has and every man will make mistakes. Some are large and some are small, but the idea of man living without sin isn’t part of the picture.

The answer to the question on Rashi seems to be that the shvatim were in fact men of unimaginable greatness, but they also had flaws and sinned. Each would be compared to a 200-carat diamond – with an imperfection. They were huge, beautiful diamonds, with flaws.

When viewing a diamond, you don’t see the flaw. To perceive it, you need to look through a jeweler’s loupe that magnifies the stone by a power of ten times or more. Only via direct scrutiny does the flaw become noticeable. It is always present, but the eye doesn’t see it. All the eye sees is glimmer and reflected light in an object of extreme beauty.

This concept has great relevance to us. People often wonder, “What will it

This Chazal tells us that our imperfections are what they are, and unless we remove them with the process of teshuvah, they will be on our permanent record. However, all that means is that I will have flaws, like a diamond. May-

be I’ll be a two-carat diamond, maybe a four-carat – but a precious gem nonetheless. While the blemishes will be there, so too will the shining brilliance of a jewel. One doesn’t cancel out the other.

The flaw isn’t eliminated, nor is the brilliance eradicated. Both are there. I will be a diamond with a flaw.

My work now, as long as I have time left, is to improve the quality of the diamond and to eliminate its faults. By learning Torah, doing mitzvos, and working on my middos, I change the weight, color, and clarity of the stone. Who I will be for eternity is in my hands. If I focus my attention and energies on growth, my reward will be perfection more valuable than the finest diamonds ever mined.

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Moshe was commanded to make garments for the Kohanim. Included in these was the ephod, a piece of clothing similar to an apron, with two shoulder straps on top holding the avnei shoham, gold settings that contained precious stones. Hashem told Moshe to engrave the names of the twelve shvatim onto these stones as a remembrance. Rashi explains that this was so that the memory of Reuvain, Shimon, Levi, etc. would be invoked when the Kohain Gadol did the avodah, and Hashem would then remember their righteousness.

This Rashi seems to be difficult to understand. The avodah of the Kohain Gadol is vital and highly sensitive; the world’s very existence depends upon it.

As a result, there are many items that are avoided in the avodah so as not to bring up even the faintest memories of sin.

While there is no question that the shvatim were men of extraordinary greatness, that greatness was also tainted with the sin of selling their brother. Didn’t that sin permanently affect who they were?

Shouldn’t that be reason enough not to mention their names in such a critical situation?

minor flaw is worth a fortune while the completely flawless diamond is almost worthless — because it is a fake. One of the signs that a diamond is real is that it has a flaw. While it may be a very minor imperfection and almost unnoticeable, all genuine diamonds have flaws. The only perfect diamonds are made of cubic zirconium and are costume jewelry.

When Hashem formed man, it was not for him to be perfect. Perfection rests

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“You shall place both stones on the shoulder straps of the ephod, remembrance stones for the Children of Israel.” -Shemos 28:12

THE JEWISH HOME

R’ Ben Tzion Shafier

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

74

A Fulfilled Life

Rabbi Naphtali Hoff

Giving Expression to the Mission

T

etzave picks up where Teruma left off, describing the vestments of the Kohen Gadol that were to be worn as he performed the avodah in the mishkan. However, while descriptions of the varied garments occupy the bulk of this week’s parsha, it is the apparent digressions of first and final aliyos that offer powerful insights into the mishkan’s true purpose The parsha opens with a commandment to press pure olive oil for use in the menorah. It concludes with a description of the mizbeach haketores, the altar on which the incense was to be burned. Rav Samson Raphael Hirsch questions their placement within the parsha, suggesting they should instead be recorded in Sefer Vayikra together with the korbanos and other core components of the avodah.

Rav Hirsch explains that their location is most fitting because these two service items give expression to the mishkan’s structure and contents. The oil represents Torah and enlightenment of the spirit, the perfection of thoughts and deeds which are the ultimate goal of avodah. Ketores symbolizes a balanced blend of fragrant ingredients, which results in a deep sense of favor and contentment. “All of the offerings are made for some purpose or another, except for the ketores, which came for only one purpose – happiness.” (Tanchuma, Tetzave, 15) In a sense, these two items reflected the core mission of the mishkan. The beautiful structure, the exquisite vessels and elaborate garments all were formed and fashioned for the purpose of facilitating a closer, deeper bond between Hashem and His people. “And you shall build for Me a mikdash and I will dwell in them.” (Shemos 25:8) The oil’s pure light and the sweet fragrance of the ketores gave the mishkan expression in direct terms, reflecting spiritual yearning and joy at its core, in actionable terms that were conveyed daily.

In a sense, the oil and incense focused us on the mishkan’s “mission statement.” The goal was to create an abode, as it were, for Hashem to dwell amongst His people. But it was also to serve as a source of inspiration, a con-

tinued reminder of the lofty goals that we must set and actions that we are to engage in if we are to deserve such proximity and intimacy.

Establishing a mission is a crucial

was also defined by mission. Perhaps the greatest example of that occurred towards the end of his life. Knowing that he will not lead the nation into the Promised Land, Moshe beseeched

Too often we get lost in the details or become overly enamored with building beautiful structures in real or figurative terms. component of any enterprise. Too often we get lost in the details or become overly enamored with building beautiful structures in real or figurative terms.

We pay close attention to attire and accessories, so to speak, but forget what it is that we were really after when we got started. Having a mission can give an organization direction and help it maintain focus.

Hashem to appoint a successor that understands how to lead and manage a complex nation.

Moshe spoke to the Lord, saying: “Let the L-rd, the G-d of spirits of all flesh, appoint a man over the congregation, who will go forth before them and come before them, who will lead them out and bring them in, so that the congregation of the L-rd will not be like

This is true on the personal level as well. Missions direct us to help others, to be responsive to their wishes and needs. They also focus us on living a fulfilling life for ourselves, and having the capacity to reflect on what drives us personally, as Jews, professionals, spouses, parents, siblings, children, community members and human beings.

The Torah abounds with examples of personal mission. Mission defined how Avraham and Sarah viewed hospitality, the way Yosef cared for a famine-stricken world, and Aharon’s approach to peace and harmony.

Moshe’s approach to leadership

sheep without a shepherd.” (Bamidbar 27:15-17) With these words, Moshe expressed the mission that drove him throughout decades of servant leadership. His mission was to serve, to go before his people, to lead and follow, to be the ultimate shepherd.

Let’s use a more contemporary example (l’havdil), the Miracle on the Hudson involving Captain Chelsey Sullenberger and his crew on the chilly morning of January 15, 2009. Reflecting back, we were all impressed by the captain’s heroic composure and demeanor. We were struck by the deep concern he expressed over the health

and wellbeing of the passengers and flight crew, a concern which propelled him to search the entire airplane cabin twice after its evacuation to ensure that no one remained onboard. He did so despite the fact that the rear of the plane was rapidly filling with water.

Each act alone would have been sufficient to garner our collective respect and admiration. But there was something else about the pilot that I had found to be quite impressive. In the aftermath of the ordeal, Sullenberger signed a lucrative book deal. Based on his relatively advanced age (58), newfound wealth and notoriety, not to mention the jarring trauma associated with his emergency landing, I had expected Sullenberger to retire from active flying. After all, he has accomplished everything that there is to achieve in aviation. He was slated for a comfortable retirement and had numerous engagements on the speaking circuit awaiting.

However, he returned to his post later that year, choosing company service over self-service. Clearly, in Sully’s world, there was more to flying than simply an opportunity to generate an income for his family. To him, flying is a means of serving others, of being part of something that is larger than himself.

In his mind, he was simply doing his job that morning, nothing more. For him to give up his passion because of one moment of glory would undermine everything that he had worked towards until that moment.

Knowing what it is that you’re after and being able to define it in clear, actionable terms takes much thought and consideration. Creating a mission statement is not easy; it requires identifying your core essence, to the exclusion of many things that may be relevant but not central. But such efforts are most worthwhile, offering a guiding light and sense of contentment that is so often lacking in our lives.

Rabbi Naphtali Hoff is an executive coach and president of Impactful Coaching and Consulting (ImpactfulCoaching.com).

He can be reached at 212.470.6139 or at president@impactfulcoaching.com.

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dgnya oiaxn xc` qpkpyn Insights into Purim

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Esther’s Hidden Strength

by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller Turn Purim on its Heart

by Rabbi Jonathan Gewirtz

Is This for Real?

87 95

Purim Certified Community News

by TJH Staff

The Very Accurate History of Far Rockaway and the Five Towns

by Avi Heiligman

Halacha

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Halachically Speaking: Mishloach Manos

by Rabbi Moishe Dovid Lebovits

In the Kitchen

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Celebrating the Purim Miracle with a Meal of Minis

Just for Laughs

To Your Health

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Celebrate Purim Safely

by Talia Zimmerman

V’Nehafo-Achoo!

Dr. Simai Tickles Your Funny Bone

by David Elazar Simai, MD

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An Ode to Purim

by Aliza Beer, RD M

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Esther’s Hidden Strength

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by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller

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From Loneliness to Strength Let us look at Esther in order to find the place within ourselves that can help us always see – like she did – beyond the exterior facade that calls itself “reality.”

Her father had died while her mother was still pregnant with Esther; her mother died at her birth.

Thus, she came into this world with the gaping wound of belonging to no one.

Her uncle, Mordechai, who later became her spiritual guide and ultimately her husband, took her in.

The Maharal of Prague (16th century) tells us that the circumstances of her birth were no coincidence. Alienation and loneliness are tools like any others and are given to us to enable us to become who we can be.

It was from that place of emptiness that Esther’s profound attachment to G-d blossomed.

The root of the Hebrew word ester is saiter, meaning “concealment.” Her name articulated her very essence – the ability to pierce the walls of concealment and find G-d where others could not.

We often are deceived by the opaque nature of our interactions with G-d. He seemingly does not react when we go off the path. We are not stricken down by lightning when we make bad choices.

Similarly, we do not find ourselves suddenly richer or necessarily in better physical health when we choose to open our vistas to what is profound and eternal within ourselves.

The wicked seem to prosper and the righteous seems to exist with the same constraints as all the rest.

This is how it seems, of course, if we don’t commit ourselves to penetrating the surface. Esther was a master at breaking through the walls that surround

us. This was her weapon that she had taught herself in her years of solitude and yearning.

Esther had learned to see G-d wherever she looked. She saw Him as her only parent and she let His presence be her guide.

We all have our empty places. Rather than allowing them to lead us towards embitterment, let us use them as a ladder.

Like a Myrtle Esther had an additional name – Hadassah. The Hebrew word Hadassah means “myrtle,” and it is one of the four species that we use on Succot. The etrog (citron) is shaped like and symbolizes the heart, the lulav (palm branch), the spine, the aravah (willow), the lips, and the hadassah are the eyes. Esther’s eyes could see inner reality as clearly as our eyes see external reality.

Her name was not random, but rather it was the ultimate description of her strongest quality.

Let us look into the nature of the hadassah more

It was from that place of emptiness that Esther’s profound attachment to G-d blossomed. closely to gain insight into Esther’s nature, and ultimately into our own.

The leaves of the myrtle are uniform and green. If I were to name a child after a plant (which is highly unlikely), I would gravitate more to Rose, Lily – or at worst, Daisy – long before I would call anyone Myrtle or Hadassah.

It is almost a command to aspire to inconspicuous mediocrity!

But the Maharal points out that her modest image embodied an internal strength. The image that Esther projected was one in which the superficial separations that polarize us played no part.

The greater our focus on the uniqueness of our external identities (age, appearance, culture) the more separate we are from the unity and commonality of

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

T

he holiday of Purim represents the best of times. It emerged, however, from the worst of times.

We were never closer to obliteration, both spiritually and physically. The hedonism of the prevailing Persian culture was part of the air that we breathed. It dulled our senses to the point that when King Achashverosh appeared in the garments of the High Priest of Jerusalem, presenting the treasure that had been robbed from the Holy Temple with the detachment of a museum curator, there was no protest.

We too had reached the point of being able to say, “How beautiful, how fascinating,” when we once said, “If I forget you, O Jerusalem, may my right hand be forgotten.” We were desensitized to ourselves and to G-d.

G-d is the hidden character of the Book of Esther.

His name is never mentioned. As the events were played out in real time, few were able to see His hidden presence.

One of the few was Esther. Somehow she had escaped the desensitization.

our internal identities (the need to love, the yearning for meaning and genuine achievement, fear of rejection and inner chaos). We become the children of one Father when we let ourselves see beyond the façade of superficial identity. It is our quiet commonality that bonds our hearts and minds.

The Talmud gives us a concrete example: Esther was given seven maidservants, as was the court-custom. In order to remember when it was Shabbat she named them after the days of the week. In a society as stratified as ancient Persia, she could have easily dehumanized them by calling them Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, etc. Nothing could be a greater insult to their human value.

So, instead, she named them after G-d’s order of creation. One was Light, the other Transcendence, etc.

They all ultimately converted to Judaism, even though that was far from Esther’s intent. By becoming more aware of whom they really were, they were able to set their sights towards who they wanted to be. She succeeded in bringing them to a genuine awareness of their inner essence.

Coolness and Warmth The Talmud rather cryptically tells us that Esther, like the Hadassah, was “green.” This does not mean that one would mistake her for Robin Hood or Lyle the Crocodile. Rather, her essence was symbolized by the color green.

Green is a color that is made up of two primary components – blue and yellow. Blue symbolizes coolness and yellow symbolizes warmth.

Esther’s inner light was a composite of two forces as well – fiery sun-like passion and the cooling nurture of water. Because she had developed her own spiritual nature so completely, she could reach out to anyone and find within her the capacity to connect.

Her “greenness” was the spiritual symbol of humility, responsiveness and sensitivity.

When we are able to peel away the layers of nonsense and glitz that are today’s remnants of Achashverosh’s palace, we will find the part of us that – like Esther – can pierce through any armor, even our own.

And then we will see G-d where we never believed He could be found – in our hearts, in those of others, in the day-to-day events that form the tapestry of our lives.  Reprinted with permission from aish.com.

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Turn Purim on Its Heart

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Rabbi Jonathan Gewirtz

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dressed in sombreros had a seudah featuring Mexican food. A group dressed as Tzahal (IDF soldiers) might have an Israeli falafel and shwarma menu for their seudah. You get the idea.

It struck me this year that while we have themes for our mishloach manos and possibly our Purim seudah, I haven’t heard of any themes for matanos l’evyonim, the tzedakah we give on Purim so others can enjoy their yom tov too.

This is unusual because we are told

in halacha that we should spend more money on matanos l’evyonim, gifts to the poor, than we do on mishloach manos. Now, you may be asking yourself, “A theme for tzedakah? What,

games. matanos l’evyonim is just the opposite. It’s not a fun thought at all.

In fact, it’s quite depressing. Also, it’s not about us. We have to be concerned about the other person and they usual-

We should make this Purim topsy-turvy.

should I only give to people dressed as Yerushalmis? Or just to organizations that provide herring for unmotivated (Jewish) Norwegian fisherman?” I don’t mean that at all.

What I mean is to turn the focus of Purim around. Instead of spending all the time preparing mishloach manos and costumes, or, at least in addition to it, take some time to plan where you will spend your tzedakah money. Is there a family you personally know that could use the funds? Is there an organization that helps people in your community? Do you want to help people learning Torah in Eretz Yisrael?

It’s interesting that since the mitzvah is to give TWO gifts of money to TWO individuals, people are often careful to give to two different organizations or rabbis collecting funds so they make sure they fulfill their mitzvah obligation.

Yet, though the mitzvah of mishloach manos is to give TWO items to ONE individual, we often give many times that amount and are more concerned with going all out than with just “meeting our obligation.”

I think I know why. mishloach manos is exciting because we get to show people how clever we are. We are thinking about ourselves and how many compliments we will get. We imagine the look on the recipients’ faces when they get our gift. It’s fun and

ly won’t even know where it’s coming from! We often don’t know to whom our money is going, and we can’t even take a measure of pride in that. It’s a mitzvah that makes us focus on someone else and nobody pats us on the back for it. That’s why we don’t get excited about it like we do the other mitzvos of the day. Bear in mind that giving to yeshivos is wonderful, and tzedakah on Purim is important, but matanos l’evyonim is about other individuals and families. It’s not about making an investment in Torah for yourself, but about feeling for someone else and ensuring they have their daily bread (and wine) for Purim.

I think we should make this Purim topsy-turvy. Instead of trying to make sure we have the cutest gift baskets, we should try to make sure others have acute joy. We should think about that depressing notion of not having money for fun mishloach manos and of having to TAKE matanos l’evyonim.

However, instead of focusing on how awkward it makes us feel, we should put ourselves in the place of the takers and think how they must feel. Then we should go out of our way to not just fulfill our obligation, but to try to make the recipient happy.

And if you didn’t prepare in time and you can’t do that for Purim? Then look back to the opening lines of this article and you’ll note that Pesach is right around the corner, and it’s not too late to make sure others can have simchas yom tov for that holiday. This Purim, if you play your cards right, you just might be someone’s miracle.

Did you like this article? There’s plenty more where that came from! Pick up The Observant Jew, a compilation of some of the best articles from the first ten years of this column, at your local bookstore or order it online and bring the inspiration home.

Jonathan Gewirtz is an inspirational writer and speaker whose work has appeared in publications around the world.

He also operates JewishSpeechWriter.com, where you can order a custom-made speech for your next special occasion.

Sign up for the Migdal Ohr, his weekly PDF Dvar Torah in English. E-mail info@ JewishSpeechWriter.com and put Subscribe in the subject. © 2015 by Jonathan Gewirtz. All rights reserved.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

W

ell, Purim is almost upon us and most of us are singing Purim tunes and getting excited for the fun holiday.

Of course, some people don’t like the word Purim because it conjures up images of Pesach cleaning and preparations, which is a sad commentary on how we view Pesach, but for now, we’re going to concentrate on Purim.

It’s pretty amazing. For weeks or even months before Purim, people plan how they will send mishloach manos.

They come up with a theme and a costume, sometimes one brings the other, but they almost assuredly must match.

Once you have your theme, you can figure out what to send.

If you decide to be farmers, for example, you can give people organic vegetables and home-baked bread.

Firemen? Red Hots or Atomic Fireballs and a bottle of water. Going as Egyptians? Why not give out matza and charoses?

It seems that we have lots of themes for mishloach manos, and sometimes even for seudas Purim. One family that

Halachically Speaking

Rabbi Moishe Dovid Lebovits

Mishloach Manos

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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The Mitzvah One is obligated to send mishloach manos on Purim to his friend, etc. This mitzvah was introduced during the time of Mordechai and Esther and is considered a divrei kabbalah mitzvah and not a d’oraisa. There are two basic reasons for this mitzvah; The Terumas Hadeshen says the reason is in order that everyone should have food for the seuda. The opinion of the Manos Ha’Levi is in order to promote friendship on Purim one should give gifts to one another. The obligation is to send two items to one person. However, the poskim encourage that the more mishloach manos one sends, the more fortunate he is. When one sends mishloach manos, he should fulfill the mitzvah and satisfy both reasons. For example, one who sends clothing has not satisfied both reasons, since he cannot use it for the meal (refer below). The poskim offer different reasons as to why there is no bracha recited on the mitzvah of mishloach manos (see footnote).

Some say the reason is because who knows if the recipient and the sender are really friends. Some say reciting a bracha will lessen the love that is supposed to come about from sending mishloach mano. The Arugas Habosem O.C. 207: pages 177-177b says the reason is because we only recite a bracha on actions that we would not do if not for the mitzvah. For example, lulav or sitting in the succah, these mitzvahs we would not perform if it not for Hashem who told us to do them. Giving presents is something everyone does all the time, therefore, it is not recognizable that we are doing it because it is mitzvah, therefore, no bracha is recited.

Eating Before Sending Mishloach Manos There are some poskim who say one should not eat (a substantial amount of food, tasting is permitted) before performing the mitzvah of mishloach manos. However, most poskim say that one is permitted to eat before the mitzvah is performed. The reason for this leniency is because one will not forget to send the mishloach manos, since most of the day people are busy sending him mishloach manos, therefore, he will remember to give as well.

Mishloach Manos First or Matanos L’evyonim?

Many say that one should give matanos l’evyonim before giving mishloach manos. Others maintain that mishloach

mishloach manos. Some say this can be accomplished by appointing your child as your mishloach manos deliverer. Others say one should give mishloach manos or money to the child to

The more mishloach manos one sends, the more fortunate he is. manos should be given before matanos l’evyonim since mishloach manos is stated first in the posuk.

Women’s Obligation Some poskim maintain that women are not obligated in this mitzvah, however, most poskim say that women are obligated to send mishloach manos.

Women should be careful to only send to women and not to men. Some poskim maintain that a woman who is sending mishloach manos may send clothing.

Many women are busy preparing the mishloach manos, and the men do not get involved. However, the men should have a role in the mishloach manos as well. Some say it is sufficient for a husband and wife to send mishloach manos together, thereby the mishloach manos is coming from both of them. A woman who is working for a frum-male boss should say that her mishloach manos is from her husband.

Young Children Participating In the Mitzvah It is good chinuch for one to train his young children in the mitzvah of

buy mishloach manos so that they can fulfill this mitzvah. Some poskim hold that children over 13, even those who are being supported by their parents, are obligated, while other poskim maintain that they are exempt and are included with their parents.

The Correct Time The correct time to send mishloach manos is on the day of Purim, and not the night of the megillah reading. If one sent his mishloach manos at night, he

was not yotzei his obligation and he must fulfill his obligation of mishloach manos by day. (However, one must keep in mind this is only the first one that one is sending. The mishloach manos that he will be sending to other people may be given at night).

What to Send?

Some say that one may send the same type of food as long as it is two separate pieces, for example, one may send two of the same type of fruits.

Most poskim maintain that it has to be two separate tasting foods. For example, one may send a piece of meat and a

cracker, etc. One is not yotzei two minim with sending an ice cream sandwich.

The reason is because sending one min with two brachos is considered one min.

Two different brachos are not required to be considered two different manos according to any opinion. One does not have to only send food items; a drink is considered a food item as well, therefore, one may send one drink item and one food item. Many poskim maintain that one may not send raw food as mishloach manos. Others say that raw food is permitted since one can cook the food if he wishes. One may send a frozen food since it is possible that one may defrost it. One may send packaged food even though it is not fit to eat “as is,” since he has to open the package prior to eating the food. Sending bread with a tavshil is considered two minim. Some send candies or chocolate as mishloach manos. One should send food that can be eaten by the seudah to at least one person.

Non-Food Items One who sends non-food items as mishloach manos was not yotzei his obligation of mishloach manos. A person may not send a sefer as mishloach manos. Money may not be sent either.

Some poskim say that one may send non-food items, however, this does not seem to be the custom.

The Shiur There is a certain amount of uncertainty as to exactly what the shiur of mishloach manos is. Some say that the food sent should consist of 6-7 oz. of food, while others maintain one should send the amount of food he would serve his own guest. The poskim stress that an important size (daver chashuv) should be given. One may send a candy tray since it is different minim. The minhag seems to be to send cake and chocolate as mishloach manos.

Sending an Item without a Good Hechsher One who sends food to someone who does not trust that specific hechsher was still yotzei his mitzvah of mishloach manos. The same holds true for someone who sends a certain item to his friend who is on a diet, and does not eat that specific food.

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Different Scenarios Sent It but Got Lost or Stolen: If one sent mishloach manos and it was lost or stolen, one was not yotzei and he must send it again.

It Was Sent Before Purim: According to some poskim, if one sent mishloach manos before Purim and it was received on Purim one has fulfilled his obligation, while others maintain that one was not yotzei.

The Recipient is Mochel: If, for some reason, the recipient says he does not want the mishloach manos, the sender was not yotzei in his obligation.

Sent It without a Name: If one sends mishloach manos and his name was not written on the package, he was not yotzei his obligation.

Left it by the Door: It is very common for people to leave mishloach manos at the door when no one is home. In this situation, if the recipient plans on coming home before nightfall, the sender has fulfilled his obligation.

If One’s Wife Accepted the Mishloach Manos: In a situation where one’s wife accepted the mishloach manos on behalf of her husband, the sender is only yotzei if the wife tells her husband that he received mishloach manos from this and this person.

(In all the above situations we are discussing if one is only sending mishloach manos to one person.)

Rabbi Moishe Dovid Lebovits is a former chaver kollel of Yeshiva Torah Vodaath and a musmach of Harav Yisroel Belsky shlita. Rabbi Lebovits currently works as the Rabbinical Administrator for the KOF-K Kosher Supervision.

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A Mourner A mourner has an obligation to send mishloach manos on Purim like everyone else. A mourner who is within the year for his or her parents or a mourner who is within the shloshim of other relatives may not receive mishloach manos. One may send mishloach manos to a mourner’s wife. A Rav who is a mourner may still accept money on Purim which is usually given to him as an expression of hakaras hatov. Some poskim maintain that the rav should not be given food. If one’s parent is a mourner, one may send them mishloach manos anyway.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Who to Send it To? One should send the mishloach manos to his friends since the posuk says “r’eyhu.” Some poskim maintain that one should not send the mishloach manos to someone that he does not get along with since he is not his r’eyhu.

Others maintain sending mishloach manos to someone you do not get along with is encouraged, since it will hopefully bring r’eyhus. One’s rebbe is considered a friend, and therefore, one may send mishloach manos to his rebbe. A person may send mishloach manos to his in-laws. There is a discussion in the poskim if one sends mishloach manos to his parents is he yotzei the mitzvah.

It would seem that sending mishloach manos to them is a fulfillment of the mitzvah. Many poskim maintain that one is not yotzei mishloach manos when sending to a child under bar mitzvah. A person’s wife is considered his friend and therefore one may send mishloach manos to her.

Arranging Mishloach Manos through a Store or Company If one is unable to prepare his own mishlaoch manos and he arranges for an organization to prepare and send it for him, he was yotzei his mitzvah.



Do You Need a Messenger?

Some poskim maintain that one should only send the mishloach manos with a shliach, a messenger. Most poskim maintain that one does not have to send it with a shliach, and one may deliver it by himself. Nonetheless, one should send at least one set of mishloach manos with a messenger to go in accordance with all opinions. One may send the mishloach manos through a young child or a goy. Some say the reason why the mishloach manos recipient gives money to the young child when he delivers the mishloach manos is because this way the sender is assured that the child accomplished his shlichos.

Being Yotzei through a Seudah One who hosts the seduas Purim for his family/friends may be yotzei the mitzvah of mishloach manos through this meal. When one accepts mishloach manos it becomes his own personal property, and he can whatever he likes with it. For example, he may send what he received to someone else, and it is still considered as if he bought the mishloach manos. Once the sender sent mishloach manos, it does not make a difference if the recipient used it at his meal, the sender was still yotzei his obligation.

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Giving It on One Plate at One Time The custom is that the two manos may be given in one utensil and it is still considered giving two manos. Initially, one should give both manos at the same time; others maintain that if one gave them one after the other it is fine.

Suri Bender & Pnina Rosenberg

Purim

Talia Zimmerman

Celebrate Purim Safely

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O

n Wednesday night, I dressed up as a sailor for Purim; my friend, Avi, disguised himself in an overgrown beard and glasses. We parted ways after listening to the megillah in our synagogue, and wished one another a wonderful, safe Purim.

The following Monday morning, the school bell rang at 8:15, signaling the hallway to clear and classrooms to fill. Rabbi Frankel began writing his Monday morning question on the board while students whispered of exciting highlights from their Purim weekend. Interested to know how Avi’s night turned out, I turned to his desk to debrief, but he wasn’t there.

Drinking wine on Purim stems from the mitzvah “a person is obligated to drink on Purim until he does not know the difference between ‘cursed be Haman’ and ‘blessed be Mordechai,’” according to the Talmudic Megillah.

With various customs and interpretations on this mitzvah, many consider this a time to drink excessively. For underage teenagers, as well as adults, drinking a large amount of alcohol on Purim for many has become a common way of celebrating the holiday. In such cases, they not only put themselves in dangerous situations, but put others at risk as well.

While numerous health studies show positive effects from legal wine intake, many misinterpret this amount. According to the Department of Agriculture and Department of Health & Human Services, one drink per day for women and up to two drinks per day for men is considered OK. Of course, other factors such as age, height, and body weight affect this precise amount.

According to many different research studies, drinking red wine can reduce the risk of stroke, heart disease, and diabetes.

To elaborate on this, Debby Sion, a wine expert from the Go-

hol content level. If drinking more than one drink, the Golan Heights Winery recommends one drink per hour.

Yael Gai, International Sales and Marketing Manager of the Golan Heights Winery, says, “The holiday of Purim is an exciting time for wine lovers to indulge in their favorite wines, but they must do so in moderation. It’s quite difficult to fully appreciate the unique taste of the wine when drinking such an amount in one sitting. If drinking more than one glass this Purim, I would recommend to start with fruiter wines with lighter body which are easier to drink, such as the Mount Hermon wines or the Golan series, following with more complex wines.

Regardless of wine choice, refrain from drinking and driving, or any activity which calls for complete awareness.”

For celebratory occasions and holidays, many enjoy the sparkling Hermon Moscato, a bubbly and delicious, low in alcohol content wine. A glass or two of such a wine provides a pleasurable, safe evening for all. This Purim, enjoy the holiday with smart decisions and fulfill the mitzvah in a meaningful manner.

I began to tremble as Rabbi Frankel begun his lesson explaining Avi’s whereabouts that morning. Aside from drinking underage, Avi consumed an excessive amount of alcohol and spent the remainder of his Purim in the hospital. Listening to Rabbi Frankel made me feel ill and emotional. I was both terrified and upset with Avi. Why did he act so irresponsibly on Purim, endangering himself and terrifying his family and friends?

But at that moment, I felt a tremendous amount of gratitude, for Avi’s situation could have ended much worse.

Make sure to make this Purim a wonderful and safe one. 

“Purim is an exciting time for wine lovers to indulge in their favorite wines, but they must do so in moderation.” lan Heights Winery, adds “many full-bodied red wines, such a Yarden Cabernet Sauvignon and Gamla Merlot contain many antioxidants, including resveratrol. Resveratrol contains key elements which help prevent damage to blood vessels, and prevents blood clots.”

Keeping in mind wine’s long-term health benefits, experts of the Golan Heights Winery suggest tips for drinking safely this Purim. One suggestion involves the type of wine to drink.

For example, complex wines, such as the Yarden CS, the Yarden Syrah Katzrin Chardonnay, not only taste delicious with food, but should be consumed with food for health reasons. Foods, such as meat, cheese and pastries, help breakdown particles in wine easier, absorbing into the bloodstream more smoothly. Drinking wine with water or other nonalcoholic beverages is highly recommended, which helps contain the blood alco-

In News

Special Reporting by TJH Staff

wether area because voters are generally well-informed, probably due to the excellent reporting of the major publications in the area. Many potential candidates, therefore, consider the Five Towns a prime area to test campaign themes and policies. OK, all kidding aside, they are here for one reason: Five Towners are usually generous with their wallets.

The perpetual Democrat frontrunner, Hillary Clinton, has set up shop in BOGO. “If you elect me,” she said, “it will be major BOGO—you’ll get me and Bill.” (Great…can’t wait for that.)

Bill Clinton, who is expected to spend lots of time in the Five Towns office, told TJH that “Hillary is—regardless of what the definition of is is—the most qualified candidate.” Local stores have been stocking up on pantsuits, to accommodate those looking to mimic Hillary’s style.

One of the Republican front-walkers, Chris Christie, has set up shop in Hapina. When asked what he likes about that location, he explained that they have a great salad bar and “if I have any shot at becoming president, I have to shed 50 pounds fast.” He then proceeded to dig into a shwarma. When asked by a reporter why he is eating a shwarma in a laffa if he is trying to slim up, he explained that “the c a m paign starts tomorrow.”

Traditions was scooped up by Jeb Bush who declared, “I’m entitled to be elected because isn’t it already a tradition in this country that every second president must be a Bush?!”

Despite this assertion, Bush made sure to point out, “Although I love my father and brother, I am my own man.”

He then promised that when he is elected he will finally go after and destroy Saddam Hussein. When a reporter pointed out that Saddam is already dead, he wagged his finger and said, “It doesn’t make a difference, we are still going to go after him! We will smoke him out of his grave! I want him dead or alive.”

Ted Cruz, who is seen as an anti-immigration right-winger despite his Hispanic background, chose Carlos & Gabby’s as his Five Town campaign headquarters, perhaps in an effort to soften his image.

While standing in front of the counter, he declared, “When I am president, I promise to allow all Mexican food to stay in America.”

Isolationist Rand Paul

will be working out of a space in Chosen Island. “America is the chosen island,” he declared. “It’s time for us

to stop worrying about the rest of the world and focus on our own island.”

He added, “We need to create a double

door with a massive wind tunnel as a barrier to entry!”

Sarah Palin is opening her campaign shop at Off the Wall. She says it’s the perfect location for her. “I can see HAFTR from my front door,” she said. “The freezing temperatures remind me of the Last Frontier.” She plans on spicing up the ice cream selection by adding flavors such as moose mint and trout truffle. She is well aware of her reputation as being not the fizziest drink in the fridge, but she promises that she has been reading up a storm in preparation for this race. When a reporter asked her what she reads, she immediately responded, “TJH of course...but just the Centerfold.”

The favorite uncle that you’re glad you don’t have, Joe Biden, set up his Five Towns shop at Incredible Feet.

“There are never too many feet to put in your mouth,” he said. Biden also pointed out that he likes the location because “there are Seven Eleven and Dunkin Donuts stores nearby where I can visit my Indian friends and I can always hop over to Kennedy Airport to hang out with my friends who are Somali cab drivers.”

Other candidates are likely to follow suit and set up field offices here. It is rumored that Donald Trump is looking for a location where he can make a nice splash. Rumor has it that he is looking to sublet some space from the W Shul. He of the infamous “Oops,” Rick Perry is also supposed to be opening an office here, but he forgot where.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

With the 2016 presidential race getting underway, candidates are rushing to set up campaign offices in the Five Towns. The Five Towns is a bell-



2016 CANDIDATES OPENING FIELD OFFICES IN THE FIVE TOWNS

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In News

The Week

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OBAMA FINALLY TAKES ON ISIS After months of reluctance, the Obama administration has finally agreed to battle ISIS. The impetus came from Mrs. Obama, who convinced her husband of the danger posed by ISIS. As she whacked weeds in the White House broccoli garden, the First Lady asserted, “Aside for global warming, nothing possesses a greater risk to mankind than ISIS – it’s all sugar and no nutrition!”

Although the president is willing to fight this terrible entity, he is still not willing to call it by its true name—Marino’s.

“This epidemic which threatens the world,” the president said, “is not limited to the Italian version of the classic frozen treat. There are many other cheap knockoffs which contribute to this danger and cause obesity as well.”

The Obama administration has held a White House summit to deal with this rotten world danger. “We can’t simply destroy this lip-smacking frozen delight; we need to try and understand why folks like it,” Obama declared. He also cautioned people not to judge the

brain-freezing agent without taking into consideration that over the years there have been many other sugary treats that have tempted children. “Going back to the tenth century, children used to eat honey glazed apples, so it would be wrong to criticize ISIS,” he said.

The White House is facing criticism by some who say that time is not on our side and the way to deal with this threat is by eradicating it, not by engaging in some sort of PR campaign. However, an Obama administration official responded to that criticism by pointing out, “Is PR not an effective tool to accomplish your goals? I know a man who was a community organizer, who never had a real job and who had zero qualifications, yet he became president of the United States because of a well-run PR campaign.”

Former Mayor of New York Rudy Giuliani declared that he is not convinced that the president hates ISIS. “I am pretty sure I have seen him with a snow cone of his own,” he said. The New York Times decried Rudy’s remarks and held a col-

spoke at the summit, was very addicted to ISIS as a child. Some say that this explains his seemingly permanent bout with brain freeze.

The summit was cut short because the president had another urgent matter to attend to—he was scheduled for a selfie.

Mayor De Blasio

Kerry’s 1 Hour Facelift New Five Towns Location Grand Opening Spring 2015

Wishes you a

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lective weeping session. According to the latest available reports, 12 New York Times reporters are still in Bellevue Hospital’s emotional trauma unit due to their dismay and shock over Rudy’s comments.

Michelle Obama spoke at last week’s conference as well and said that she heard that some children are so addicted to the sugar inside this horrible cup of frozen junk that they even turn the ISIS over to access the gooey sugar on the bottom. “Others,” she said “take the cover off and start digging a hole down to the center right away—like they are working an oil field.”

Secretary of Defense Ashton Carter—who was either in a 1990s boy band or named after someone who was in one—promises that “we will lick ISIS in our fight against them.”

Interestingly, it is being reported that Vice President Joe Biden, who also

Look Younger!

Act Older Bully Leaders of Small Countries Park your Yacht Anywhere Don’t bother Shoveling your Snow Hang out with Ayatollah Khomeini Eat as much Heinz Ketchup as you want

Happy Purim

New Purim Rules: No Drinking from Styrofoam cups.

No Mixing Soda and Vodka.

Do Not Party with Republicans.

Do Not Make Fun of Obama.

No Banging by Haman (He was only freedom fighter).

"It is a small sacrifice to make to prevent global warming and assure that your great grandkids are just as miserable as you"

NOW

A More Progressive Purim!

In News

Special Reporting by TJH Staff

sorry for themselves and having the HachKnicksas Orchim volunteers in

the stands really lifts their spirits.”

Some volunteers, who are excep-

tionally kind, have even been going to show support for the Nets, who play in Brooklyn. “It’s not easy going into Brooklyn,” said one volunteer. “It wouldn’t be easy going into Brooklyn if I was picking up the winning Powerball ticket, all the more so to go watch the Nets lose, but I do it because it’s a mitzvah.”

Many local schools have gotten involved in this chessed and there are talks of the DRS Wildcats possibly hosting the New York Knicks for an exhibition game. Carmelo Anthony said that he would welcome the opportunity to play against the DRS Wildcats but asked for them to “have some shalchmanas on us.”

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HachKnicksas Orchim organization is looking for volunteers to visit the downtrodden and needy.

Volunteers must be willing to travel to places such as Brooklyn and Manhattan in order to provide encouragement to those who are going through difficult times and feeling helpless. Upon arriving at their destinations, the volunteers should be prepared to clap their hands and feign excitement. Volunteers can go to Madison Square Garden and cheer for the group of downtrodden players that call themselves the Knicks. “You don’t know what it means to us to have this wonderful organization help us out,” said Knicks president Phil Jackson. “Our poor players [average worth $47 million] are feeling so



HACHKNICKSAS ORCHIM ORGANIZATION CREATING MASSIVE KIDDUSH HASHEM

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In News

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WILL DELICIOUS DISHES BE MOVING TO JFK AIRPORT? Rumors of high level negotiations between board members of Delicious Dishes and the Port Authority have some squishy cholent eaters breathing a smelly sigh of relief. After years of long lines, waiting for tables, and spending summer Thursday nights chilling in the fire station alleyway, fine diners might now get to spread their wings and eat cholent, kishke and gribiness (fried chicken skin) without the wait.

For anyone who has not experienced the Delicious Dishes Thursday night chill – you have not yet lived. Every Thursday night, hundreds of Five Towns residents and guests from Brooklyn and Queens squeeze into Delicious Dishes for the best Shabbos food out there. The mood is festive, the aroma intoxicating, and the crowd exhilarating. While many come for the awesome food and great conversation, most make the trip in rain,

snow and ice for the magical ambiance. According to DD officials, there are hundreds of potential patrons who are turned away by the limited space and availability.

Rumors of talks with the Port Authority are getting a mixed reaction.

While many are excited to see a new Delicious Dishes world headquarters built on the empty fields abutting Kennedy airport, some feel that the ambience will be affected.

Shragie Farfelman from Far Rockaway complains, “I make the 10 minute drive to DD and I don’t mind the 20 minute wait for a table – it’s hard to explain but it’s just geshmak.” Others feel that the

new digs will enhance the experience.

Donnie from Back Lawrence added, “I love the food but I find it a bit uncomfortable eating dinner in a room smaller than my bathroom.”

The owners of DD know that they can’t please everyone but they plan on going ahead with the $20M project and are very excited to expand their Thursday night operation and open it up to JFK fliers from around the world. New menu items are being planned as well to include chicken finger flavors and possibly a lukshen kugel appearing on the menu.

Time will tell if this project will come to fruition in the next few years. Until then, customers will continue to fill the void at the current Delicious Dishes location in Woodmere next door to the Woodmere Fire Station. If you haven’t tried it yet – you haven’t lived. This reporter hopes to see you there next Thursday night.

Tour

Rockhall Museum (Est. 1932)

With founding member

Brian Williams 

Ariel view in Chinook Chopper



Tour narrated by Brian Williams



Hear Brian describe original inhabitants



Hear about his dinner the first night after construction was completed

Special Reporting by TJH Staff

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watch multiple cars at one time—on both ends of Central Avenue. When drivers claim that they were not parked in a spot for more than an hour, he asserts, “I was standing there the whole time watching the car,” which usually elicits a guilty verdict from the well-tanned judge.

As to what they plan on doing with

the increased revenue the towns have said that some of the money will go towards a Yankee horse at Cedarhurst Park to join the Mets horse that is already there. The rest of the money? Well, Mr. Williams demands a pretty hefty salary.

After all, he is a decorated veteran of the U.S. Army.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

drivers neglect to put quarters in meters not realizing that the spot they are in has a Sunday meter, which leads to hefty tickets.

The Village of Cedarhurst’s revenue has also been boosted by the UFO meters which were placed on certain stretches of Central Avenue. Although some people think that those big-brother-is-watching meters are wacky, if you only knew what the meters think of you.

The biggest revenue boost has come from the village’s newest meter maid, who has been killing it—Brian Williams. Mr. Williams is especially effective when testifying at trial. He has an ability to



This year saw record-breaking revenue for the villages of the Five Towns as they made $4 billion off of parking meters and tickets due to violated meters. One village official admitted that the strategy of making drivers pay for some spots on Sunday and not for others has successfully confused the daylights out of people and has been a factor in increasing revenue.

He explained that many times drivers end up putting quarters in meters even though they don’t really have to because they say, “Hey, it’s only a quarter... Better safe than sorry.” Also, many times,

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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The Week

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FIVE TOWNS RESIDENT EXONERATED AFTER 22 MONTHS IN PRISON The ordeal is finally over for Joseph Ganevsefer and his family. After serving 22 months in a local correctional facility, he was released after DNA evidence proved his innocence. His conviction was primarily based on a confession, which he later claimed was coerced.

His attorney, Mr. Jack Dcshfrmurpoket, who is of Polish descent, said that Mr. Ganevsefer’s ordeal began when he received a call from a “516” number that he didn’t recognize. He picked up the phone and the person on the other end stated in a hushed and rushed voice: “Your book is overdue! Please return it.”

Joseph’s heart sank as he thought to himself, “My procrastination is killing me.

Why can’t I just put the book in the library’s book box?”

He went home that night and checked

the bathroom but was not able to locate the book. He was ashamed to ask his wife if she saw the book, because if he can’t take care of his library books, how can he handle his other obligations? So, he conveniently forgot about the phone call.

But not returning your book to the library in the Five Towns is not a problem that goes away.

The phone calls became more frequent, but despite his searching he was unable to locate the book. Against his better judgment and without an attorney at his side, Mr. Ganevsefer went into the library to try and talk to the librarians.

He planned on telling them that he didn’t have the book. But when he got up to the counter, there were at least five sets of eyes glaring at him in utter silence. He

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fell apart and screamed (not a smart thing to do in a library when you are already in trouble), “I lost the book!!” He was summarily arrested.

After spending much time in isolation in prison, he began to wonder whether he had the book in the first place. The big break came when the book somehow was returned to the library and prosecutors agreed to reopen the case. There was a fresh meatball stain on page 23 which did not match Mr. Ganevsefer’s DNA and he was released.

When asked what he plans on doing now that he has his freedom back, he responded, “Well, the first thing I will probably do is buy a Kindle.”

MAYOR BILL DEBLASIO PREDICTS MAJOR PURIM STORM According to weather forecaster Bill de Blasio, a mega snowstorm will hit the Five Towns on Purim 2015. “This is going to be the biggest snowstorm in 200 years,” de Blasio predicted. Based on his last blizzard warning in early February, we can expect anywhere from a halfinch to two inches of snow. The mayor stated that he will monitor the situation very closely, “I plan on waking up extra early—at about 10Am—to see whether there will be morning bus service.”

De Blasio urged residents to use extreme precaution. He stated that he and his wife, Charlene McCray, actually sat down with their son, Dante, and

discussed with him what he should do if he gets caught on a slippery sidewalk during the storm.

The head of the New York City Sanitation Department’s union expressed outrage at the mayor’s comments.

“What type of garbage is that? How does he disparage those who work hardest to clean up the city streets? The mayor doesn’t trust us? If Dante wants to handle this storm on his own, let him go ahead and get some kosher salt and lay it out on his own sidewalk!”

The mayor was not available to respond to those comments. He was busy tying Al Sharpton’s shoelaces.

In News

Special Reporting by TJH Staff

SCANDAL ROCKS MAIN STREET

DeBlasio Administration: Subway System to Extend into Five Towns After much discussion behind closed doors on this contentious topic, the de Blasio administration has decided to extend Far Rockaway/Queens into what is now known as the Five Towns—the villages of Lawrence, Cedarhurst, Woodmere, Hewlett and Inwood. Each Village will maintain its original name, although the entire region will also be known as Far Rockaway.

The de Blasio administration prides itself on bringing market rate housing to New York City, which has historically had a shortage of housing for the poor. A lot in “Back Lawrence” has been purchased for the construction of the largest housing project in the Five Boroughs. This lot will extend into an area formerly

In a fit of excitement he jumped up, eliciting the curiosity of other restau-

known as Woodsburgh as well as Hewlett Harbor to accommodate an influx of new residents.

The NYC transit system will extend its service, which presently terminates at Mott Avenue in Far Rockaway, into the formerly-named Long Island Rail Road stations of Inwood, Lawrence, Cedarhurst, Woodmere and Hewlett.

Those stations will now be known as Doughty Boulevard (former Inwood station); Lawrence Avenue (former Lawrence station) and so on. LIRR service will cease to exist as the area is no longer part of Nassau County.

Those wishing to continue to utilize the LIRR can still access it in Valley Stream station, which remains part of Nassau County. There will be an MTA shuttle bus service for those wishing

way, will now continue several more stops into Hewlett. The train will run every ten minutes instead of the current 45 minute to an hour wait. Those driving in the area should make adjustments to their schedule to accommodate closing train track gates. There is discussion of running the “E” train as well and they are being test driven at this time. The fare will be the standard MTA fare of $2.50, instead of the current exorbitant fees.

The Daf Yomi shiur will be in the second to last car of the train and will start at the Mott Avenue station, at a time yet to be determined. Each shiur will be divided into separate sections— there will be a Far Rockaway shiur, a Lawrence shiur, Cedarhurst and Woodmere shiur, no if’s and’s or buts. There will be a nominal fee. Those who do not pay the fee will have to learn with the Far Rockaway class, which will consist of the brightest minds.

There is a minority of people in the current Five Towns area who are backwards as well as ignorant in their views and are against this progressive and obvious improvement to the area. They are oblivious to how this could improve the entire area. To those that are beyond backwards and are so ignorant so as to be unable to see how this can have a positive effect on the entire area, there will be a protest and march on March 5 at 8PM, to be held at the current Mott Avenue station. It is a “bring your own signs” protest. We will keep the community abreast of the progress as it takes place.

to go from the subway platform in Hewlett to the LIRR station in Valley Stream. There will also be shuttle bus service to transport residents to the new sprawling housing projects.

The present “A” train, which runs from upper Manhattan to Far Rocka-

rant patrons (who were all Ashkenazi by the way).

Word quickly spread that an Ashkenazi bentcher was found on Main Street. Since the finding many people have stopped at the restaurant to see the bentcher, but it is no longer available. The restaurant manager refuses to comment on the whereabouts of the bentcher. “I have no comment on that episode,” he said. “All I can say is that it will never happen again. We got a whole new batch of Sefardic bentchers. And, yes, we made sure they have some shwarma grease on them.” 

New Heimisher Kollel to Open

A new chassidisher kollel has opened in the Five Towns for baalei batim. Heimisher kugel is served 24 hours a day. Lunch is served every day.

The kollel orders from local food establishments such as Gefilte Fish Plate, Pizza Langa Payis and Brasserie Halevi Yitzchok of Barditchav. Thursday night chulent is served 24/7. For those concerned, a cardiologist is present at all times. However, due to cost issues, it is BYOA—Bring Your Own Anesthesia.

There is also an attorney at the kollel at all times, in case of necessary lawsuits.

Any doctor or attorney who would like to volunteer should please contact the kollel, as there is a shortage of doctors and lawyers in the Five Towns. 

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Exclusive Report by Reuven Guttman

confirmation that his suspicions were correct—the bentcher was Ashkenazi.



A full-scale investigation has been opened to determine how an Ashkenazi bentcher was found in a Queens restaurant. According to Yosef Shwarmalover, he was eating dinner in a restaurant on Main Street and asked for a bentcher. Although he is Ashkenaz, he was expecting a Sefardic bentcher, as usual. When he began bentching, though, things seemed normal.

He began to wonder if, in fact, for the first time ever, he was actually given an Ashkenazi bentcher in a Queens restaurant. When he reached the passage of “u’vinei Yerushalayim” and it didn’t say “vetivneh…” he received the

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Forgotten Heroes

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to the Five Towns and Far Rockaway area for yeshiva almost ten years ago, I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful this area looked.

Everyone was friendly by New York standards, the beaches were pristine, and it was absolutely quiet at night.

This is after spending time in Brooklyn. However, I am reminded by some elder states people of Far Rockaway and the Five Town how great this place once was.

Far Rockaway and the surrounding areas of the Five Towns were once inhabited by Native Americans. No airports, trains or rundown playgrounds were within a twenty mile radius. You had to visit New Jersey for that type of recreation. While Manhattan was sold for a mere $24 in trinkets to the great-grandfather of Donald Trump, the Rockaway Peninsula was more expensive. The property prices seen in today’s market are reflective of the land 300 years ago.

Anyways, nice folks, led by their leader Chester W. Rock, wanted to make the land just like the rest of the territories so they commissioned the best architects to make houses as expensive as possible. There was a stipulation in this contract—the houses had to have a “homey” but rundown feeling to them. Mr. Rock wanted to make it seem like we were here before the Indians and it seems like he made his point.

at uneven intervals. That wasn’t noisy enough, so ten public schools and a golf course were built even though there were less than a hundred families living in the area at the time. Slowly, the population grew and a park was added

Five Towns residents are much luckier than those from across the 878 as their train is much quieter—except while tooting its horn at intersections.

Now, come to think of it, hearing the tooting horn of a passing train late at

Soon they realized that Central was too quiet, so they made sure the fire department would emit loud honks at uneven intervals. with a statue of a horse commemorating the horse drawn carriages that built the area.

Over 100 years ago, the City of New York decided to make a subway system.

For those who don’t know, a subway goes underground but for some unexplained reason, the A train went aboveground once it reached Queens (the

night makes up for not being near the subway. Oh, and those annoying backups that start when those mechanical arms go down don’t help the situation either.

There is one major annoyance that residents of both areas suffer together.

This once-upon-a-time golf course (I am not making that one up) that has

Living

author is very thankful for that because he gets cellphone service at that point although the planners didn’t have him in mind when they originally planned it). Instead of placing the tracks near the Jamaica Bay, which I doubt has many fish left (there are always people fishing by the B120s but I never saw anyone catch a thing besides a cold), the tracks were placed near the Atlantic Ocean.

Now, instead of getting the quieter new trains, residents have to hear the very loud squeaking of the trains at night.

become known as JFK Airport can be cited as the cause for coming late into work. Or school, for that matter. Seriously, does the city really think that the busiest airport on the east coast won’t rattle babies in their sleep? The noise level is so high that hibernating bears in Alaska wake up from the tremble. My research did turn up that in 1957 two Russian jets weren’t allowed to fly into JFK, then called Idlewild, because of noise levels from the planes. However, this phenomenon of keeping the noise

Avi Heiligman is a weekly contributor to The Jewish Home. He welcomes your comments and suggestions.for future columns and can be reached at aviheiligman@gmail.com.

At

the same time, Larry H. Cedar decided to come to the area with his five kids. Mr. Cedar’s kids became the respective mayors of the Five Towns even though they all had names of trees. His followers were excellent workers and the houses they built were magnificent. However, since they used only horse drawn carriages, the streets were made of cheap pavement and very narrow. When they decided that a fire department was needed, it was placed on the quietest block in town—Central Ave. Soon they realized that Central was too quiet, so they made sure the fire department would emit loud honks

level down has yet to be fully explored.

I do have a solution—move the airport to an old airfield in Brooklyn where no one would notice the increase in decibel levels because everyone is honking so loudly.

The only good thing that I can remember from JFK being so close to the Five Towns was that we got to see the Enterprise Space Shuttle flying for the last time. True story: I saw it coming and the natural instinct is to point it out it out to whoever is nearby. As luck would have it that the other person within shouting distance was, wait for it, the meter maid! When she saw me pointing skywards, she probably thought I was pointing out a UFO and was about to call the cops for wasting her time. Only when she saw a plane piggybacking something from outer space did she realize that I wasn’t a mental case. here has been quite the experience coming all the way from the boondocks (well, Baltimore is not quite in Yehupitsville and there a Jewish Home down there as well) but I haven’t given up on it so quickly. I mean, if I ever get hungry in the morning I have ten breakfast places to choose from, eleven if you include Dunkin’ Donuts. Where else do you have three dedicated sushi restaurants, four completely kosher supermarkets and Wok Tov in the same area? I’m really not sure where I would be without Wok and when Yossi’s Grill closed, it was sad day for us yeshiva guys.

Until next time, when I write about some bloody battle or supersonic jet I wish you a freilichein Purim and watch out for those potholes on 878 that have been there for a long time. Don’t worry—they’re not going away anytime soon. And watch out for those speed traps as well…especially when you’re running to catch your flight at JFK.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Coming



The Very Accurate History of Far Rockaway and the Five Towns

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Avi Heiligman

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Riddle!

David is delivering mishloach manos for his wife, who is a master mishloach manos maker. She individualizes each one and spends weeks before Purim working on it. David labels each one before delivering them. The first box is marked “Chocolate,” the second is marked “Candy” and the third box is marked “Mixed.” While on the way to make his deliveries, David realizes that he labeled the boxes incorrectly. But he doesn’t want to open them up because his wife spent approximately 6 hours and 35 minutes tying them with bows.

How can David figure out what is in each mishloach manos by only taking one item out of one of the mishloach manos boxes?

Answer on next page

You Gotta be

Kidding!

Yankel was dressed in his finest suit as he went for an interview with the president of a world renowned bank. The banker turns to him and says, “So tell me sir, what do you think is your greatest weakness?”

Yankel, who prepared for his questions, responds, “Honesty. Sometimes I am just too honest and I say what’s on my mind.”

The banker is intrigued and says, “I don’t think honesty is a weakness.”

Yankel replies, “Actually, I really don’t care at all what you think.”

A Costume is Like a Thousand Therapy Sessions What you dress up as tells me everything I need to know about you: E A Scotsman with a Kilt: You went up the wrong aisle at Party City and totally didn’t realize it.

E A-Rod: You see nothing wrong with cheating… and have a hard time not getting caught.

E Joe Biden: You like saying dumb things and getting away with it.

E Disney Character: You believe in make believe. Don’t worry, someday your dreams will come true.

E Chassid: You like kishka.

E Juice Box: You think so outside the box that you actually put yourself in a box…must be really comfortable.

E Mummy: So, you bought your costume in October, huh? Anything to save a few dollars!

E Policeman: You like doughnuts.

E Vladimir Putin: You probably always thought you were the strongest kid in your class, right? (If you only knew how many times you were “donkey-eared.”)

E President Obama: You are a Kenyan—I mean you want to be president!

E Fireman: You like putting out fires.

E Steve Jobs: You are a mogul at heart. You can certainly create the next Apple...start planting!

E Limo Driver: You never see a rearview mirror you don’t want to schmooze with.

E Cowboy: Let me guess—you tell people that you have a concealed carry license.

E Clown: Forever the funnyman.

E Sushi Chef: You are an addict. Stop thinking about sushi; it’s just food!

E Long-haired Rock Star: Do you really think that would make you happy?

E Soldier: You are a true patriot, unlike your commander-in-chief (no, no, no—I didn’t just say that...it was Giuliani talking)

97 79

  

     

When I wear my watch on left hand, people don’t think I’m a lefty, they just think I am dressed up like one.

I finally come to the philosophical understanding of why Hashem created Presidors.

If I have a bad hair day (of which there is a 100% likelihood), people just think it’s part of my costume.

I get to drink water out of an Absolut Vodka bottle… which leads my mother to shriek almost as loud as when I spray her fur coat with invisible ink (which is not really invisible and actually leaves a stain, but don’t tell anyone).

I get to drink as much grape juice as I want without feeling guilty (“Son, you have no idea how expensive grape juice is!”)

When I don’t want to talk to someone, I just make believe I am drunk as a skunk.

I play air saxophone and nobody thinks I am weird.

I get to stuff my face with hamantashen not matzah.

It’s easier to spell than Chanuka…Chanukah…

Hanuka… Hanukah…Hanooka…Hookah…whatever.

you guys letters. They are The editors generally don’t let me write I may engage in the capital the PC police and are concerned that just threatened by our deep crime of humor. Or, maybe they are was thinking of writing in anbond, which they could never form. I and what I write, but then other language so they wouldn’t underst er looking at the rest of this I decided to write in English because aft h too well either! rag, I realize that they don’t know Englis wa nt to personally invite The reason I am writing is because I er’s yea rly Purim bash. It will you to the TJH Centerfold Commission r been to. There will be perbe the most lavish party you have eve , Av rohom Fried and Shlomo formances by LIPA, Shwekey, MBD d on Wednesday night. It will Yehuda Rechnitz. The bash will be hel and an anticipated overflow sta rt at 9PM. Due to popula r demand . crowd, it will be located at PO Box 266 there, if you think you will To all of you Bigsons and Sereshes out shot...I speak 70 languages, show up and dethrone me, you have no baby! And I’m pretty good at jujitsu!

So come one, come all...it will be a blast!

Happy Purim! ty. If you really know how P.S. There will be no alcohol at this par a drink. And, besides, I don’t to party, you can have a blast without rugs! need anyone throwing up on my Persian to TJH. Email address is P.P.S. Also, send in your Purim pictures something like that.

Editor@F iveTownsJewishHome.co m, or

I get to do challenging exercises such as: V’esParshandasahV’esDolphone (or is it Dolphin)V’esAsp asaV’esPorassaV’esAdaliaV’esAridasaV’esParmshtaV’esA risaiV’esAridaiV’esVaysasa!!!!! (Wooooooow…expanding those lungs!)

G OT FU N N Y?

Comm Let the ission er dec Send

your s t

uff

ide

to fivetow centerfold@ nsjewis hhome. com

FEBRUARY 26, 2015



I get to show off my table-drumming skills…in shul of all places!

Dear Underlings,





THE JEWISH HOME

Top Reasons I Love Purim

ANSWER TO RIDDLE: First, David takes an item from the box marked “Mixed.” If it is chocolate, he knows that the box can only contain chocolate and can’t be the mixed box. He looks at the other 2 boxes; one is labeled “Candy” and the other is labeled “Chocolate.” Since the boxes are mislabeled, he knows that the one that is labeled “Candy” does not actually contain only candy, rather it is the mixed box. Now he also knows that the box labeled “Chocolate” must be the candy box. (Same logic applies if he picks out a piece of chocolate from the box labeled “Mixed.”)

Health & Fitness

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

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

98

David Elazar Simai, MD

V’Nehafo-Achoo!

Dr. Simai Tickles Your Funny Bone From the desk of Dr. David Simai…

This week the staff decided to hijack Dr. Simai’s weekly article for the Purim issue…ha, ha, ha. We (Ilana Greenberg and Sheryl Weisberger) have taken some stories from Dr. Simai’s years in practice and some other funny pediatric stories we stumbled upon. We hope you enjoy this Purim edition of “Dr. Simai’s” weekly articles!

A woman came in for a baby check with her 6-month-old and she had what looked like chocolate milk in the baby’s bottle. Dr. Simai started explaining to her as kindly as he could that she shouldn’t be giving her baby chocolate milk. But then the mom interrupted him: “Oh, that isn’t chocolate milk. It’s coffee. He just loves it!”

One woman measured her baby’s temperature by pre-heating the oven and putting one hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby’s forehead. She told the nurse her baby’s fever was about 250°F. Dr. Simai had to explain to a patient that Band-Aids do not cure anything, they just cover up the wound. He also had to explain that just because it says “contains vegetable extracts” on the side of it, a can of Coke does not count as one of your five a day. Another patient was complaining that the cat allergy medicine we gave her was not working (formulated in an inhaler). It turns out she was spraying the inhaler on her cat.

Now some REAL stories from our 



office: A new parent called my office stating that their baby would not stop crying. Being that they were new parents, I told them to come right in so we could rule out anything serious. When my nurse went in to triage she asked all

mother asked, “Um which way does the diaper go on?”

I was paged about a child with diarrhea and blood in his stool. I had told the mother to keep the child hydrated and to call me or come in the next day.

In the morning, my office called the

“Oh, that isn’t chocolate milk. It’s coffee. He just loves it!” the necessary questions including: Did you feed the baby? Change the diaper?

Did you give your baby a pacifier? The parents responded that they did feed the baby and changed the diaper but did not give the baby a pacifier. When asked if they were not using a pacifier, they responded that no one had told them that they were allowed to use a pacifier or that it was normal for the baby to cry. The baby had been in the nursery at the hospital and the mother was not aware that babies cry.

One of our patients came in and undressed their newborn. When we asked them to put the diaper back on, the





  

child’s mother to check on him. The mother answered the phone laughing hysterically. When asked what was so funny she began to tell me that her son did not have a bloody stool, rather she was told by another child that it was something red he ate. The other child had vomited something red right after the other child made, in the same toilet bowl, and showed it to the mom who realized it was something they ate.

One night while I was a resident at LIJ I received a call from a frantic father stating that his child was constipated.

When I asked why the father suspected that he was constipated, the parent answered that the child usually has a bowel movement at 5pm every day but today it was already 5:10pm and the child had not had a bowel movement.

While I was a resident, I saw a patient who had a lot of wax in their ears. I tried to remove as much as possible and then went on to explain to the parents how to clean them at home. I explained that they needed to instill some drops in the ear every night. The mother then asked, “Doctor – I just have one question – how does the fluid I put in the ear come out? Does it shoot out the other ear?” It was 2am and I was not sure if I heard it right…My co-resident confirmed that I did hear her correctly.

One night as a resident in the Pediatric ICU at LIJ, a 5-week-old patient

was brought in with possible meningitis. The parents brought him in as he was totally unresponsive. The workup began on the patient and when results came back negative for meningitis, further bloodwork was done and it was discovered that the baby had a very high alcohol level. When the parents arrived, I went over to review the history with them. They said that the baby had a cold and fever for a few days. Instead of using Tylenol, they decided to rub him down with alcohol. Most people use rubbing alcohol, but these parents spared no expense – they told me they used the “good stuff – ABSOLUT.” I grinned but sighed as I told the parents that I think they will be out of the ICU in no time. However, it was harder to convince my attending that this actually happened… That was the first time this baby fulfilled the mitzvah of ad d’lo yada bein arur Haman l’baruch Mordechai. Please drink responsibly this Purim – and please stick with low-cost Tylenol with your infants when they have fevers – save the good stuff for future simchos!

Wishing you a freilichen Purim from all of us, the hardworking, gentle swabbing, sober and smiling staff at Dr. Simai’s office – Sheryl, Ilana, Chani, Veronica and Jenna.

And yes, we will be open on Purim day – from 9-11am – for dressed up (sick visits) only.

Dr. David Simai is a Board Certified Pediatrician from the Five Towns. He is a full time attending in his own private practice since 2007 in Cedarhurst, New York. In addition, he is an Attending Physician at LIJ-Cohen Children’s Hospital, North-Shore Manhasset University Hospital and South Nassau Communities Hospital. He can be contacted for consultation at 516 374-2228 or via email at davidsimai@yahoo.com.

NOTE: name, gender, geographical area and other identifying information were deliberately altered in this article in order to protect the patient’s privacy. This article is not intended to help diagnose or treat any specific disease. Always consult your personal physician before diagnosing or treating yourself or your child for any of the above mentioned illnesses.

99 THE JEWISH HOME 

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100

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90 102

Notable Quotes

Compiled by Nate Davis

“Say What?”

President Obama spent Monday playing a round of golf in sunny California, and then flew back to Washington on Air Force One. And 10,000 people stranded at Boston’s Logan Airport just became Republicans.

- Jimmy Fallon

There’s a new device that allows airline passengers to completely isolate themselves from their row mates. The device is called a baby.

– Conan O’Brien

It’s a foolish thing to do and you could kill yourself, so I’m asking people to stop their nonsense right now.

These are adults jumping out windows.

- Boston Mayor Marty Walsh at a news conference asking people to stop leaping off roofs, porches, and out of windows into mounds of snow

I love my father and my brother. I admire their service to the nation and the difficult decisions they had to make, but I am my own man.

– Jeb Bush during a foreign policy speech in Chicago last week

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Yesterday a federal judge suspended President Obama’s executive order on immigration. When asked if he’s mad about being overruled, Obama said, “You know I’ve been married for 23 years, right?”

– Jimmy Fallon

Like Hillary Clinton, I too have traveled hundreds of thousands of miles around the globe. But unlike Hillary Clinton, I know that flying is an activity, not an accomplishment.

- Carly Fiorina, the former Hewlett-Packard CEO who is flirting with a Republican presidential bid in 2016

Little Caesars is about to deliver a bacon-wrapped deep dish pizza. It’s a pizza with three and a half feet of bacon wrapped around it…

We will not stop until we’ve created a pizza that leaps out of the box and pulls our hearts directly out of our chests.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Last night during a speech, Chris Christie said, “There’s only one Chris Christie, and this is it.” I don’t know. It still looks like at least two.

– Seth Myers

Do Jews themselves bear any responsibility for the rising anti-Semitism we are witnessing here?

- Radio interview question posed to Israel’s Ambassador to Sweden Isaac Bachman after the shooting at a synagogue in neighboring Denmark I reject the question entirely.

- Ambassador Bachman in response

Yesterday during a speech on national security, Jeb Bush mispronounced Boko Haram and got confused between Iran and Iraq. When reached for comment, his brother, George W., said, “He sure sounds presidentiary to me.”

– Conan O’Brien

MORE QUOTES

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Gallup, the polling company, released its annual wellbeing index where they rank the health and happiness of residents of each of the 50 states. Alaska finished first and Hawaii was No. 2. It’s interesting that the top two happiest states are the ones that are farthest away from the rest of us.

– Jimmy Kimmel

Do you know what Kayla Mueller … and my 343 firefighters who died on September 11, and my 2,700 citizens, innocent people who died on September 11, and the soldiers at Fort Hood who died with a man yelling Allah Akbar, or the Jewish people who were just sitting there being shot and killed just a few weeks ago in France because they’re Jewish, you know what they all have in common? They have in common a movement the president of the United States will not recognize. They have been murdered, they have been slaughtered…they have been tortured, they have been beheaded, they have been burned by a movement that the president of the United States will not recognize. What is wrong with him? … Just the other day he called the slaughter of those Jewish people in France a random act. Mr. President, wake up!

Come off the golf course. Come back to earth.

- Rudy Giuliani at the Iranian-American Community symposium



Unless Congress acts one week from now, more than 100,000 DHS employees, border patrol, port inspectors, TSA agents will show up to work without getting paid. They all work in your states. These are folks who if they don’t have a paycheck, they are not going to be able to spend that money in your states and it will have a direct impact on your economy.

- President Obama speaking to the National Governors Association about the upcoming congressional vote on whether to continue funding the Department of Homeland Security

The person who spent four hours digging out of this parking spot is an Iraq veteran. Do I have PTSD? Steal this space and find out!

- A sign posted near an empty parking spot in Boston after its most recent storm

THE JEWISH HOME

They had men’s underwear on for half price and I bought a bunch that was clearly too small for me. I find it difficult to sit for any length of time.

- Canadian legislator Pat Martin explaining why he hurriedly ran out of the House of Commons during a vote last week

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

104 92

This week Wal-Mart announced that it will increase its employees’ hourly wages by 40 percent.

Workers are pretty excited because they’ll finally make enough money to shop at Target.

– Jimmy Fallon The notion that radical Islam isn’t at war with the West is an ugly lie.

- Tweet by Senator John McCain, R-Ariz.

I do not believe that the president loves America. He doesn’t love you. And he doesn’t love me. He wasn’t brought up the way you were brought up and I was brought up through love of this country.

- Former Mayor of New York Rudy Giuliani at a private dinner in Manhattan that featured Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker, a possible presidential contender No one should have the illusion that they can gain military superiority over Russia, put any kind of pressure on it. We will always have an adequate answer for any such adventures.

- Russia’s President Vladimir Putin at a ceremony in honor of World War II veterans

Of the 20 new measles cases reported this afternoon, 18 are linked to Disneyland.

Wow. Small world.

– Seth Myers

We don’t want anything from you, Obama. Now the people of Egypt know that you are the man of ISIS and Hamas… You told us “assalamu alaykum” [peace be upon you] in Cairo and we believed you, but now we know that you were playing and the reality is that you wanted to divide us. Obama, your trick is now clear.

- Lyrics of a new song released by popular Egyptian singer Shaaban Abdel Rahim

To be personally delivered to Obama.

- Message written on a missile in a Russian Army parade held this week

The restaurant chain Salad Works has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy.

Analysts attribute the failure to it being a salad restaurant located in America.

– Conan O’Brien

– Conan O’Brien Are you happy not to shower for up to a month, live in close proximity to three people and 2,000 smelly penguins for five months?

- From a job posting seeking applicants to run the museum and gift shop at Port Lockroy, located on Goudier Island off the Antarctic Peninsula

Starbucks has launched a home delivery service. It’s perfect for anyone too lazy to walk one block in any direction.

A new Dr. Seuss book is coming out in July. It has been over 20 years since he passed away. I’m not saying it’s a bit spooky, but the book is called, “The Ghost Who Wrote the Most.”

– Jimmy Fallon A recent poll shows that New Jersey residents feel Hillary Clinton has the “right look” to be president, while Chris Christie does not. Then today, Christie was spotted at JCPenney trying on pantsuits.

– Seth Myers

At the White House Summit on Extremism-ThatShall-RemainUnspecifiedBecause-ViolentFollowersBelonging-ToUnnamed-ExtremistMovement-MightTake-ExtremeOffense-And-ActExtremely, the feds are touting a groundbreaking new strategy to fight terrorists. Just kidding. It’s actually the same old futile strategy that big-government liberals use to cure everything: mo’ money, mo’ money, mo’ money.

– Michelle Malkin As a liberal Democrat who twice campaigned for President Barack Obama…I certainly would never vote for or support a member of Congress who walked out on Israel’s prime minister.

- Alan Dershowitz, Wall Street Journal

There’s a rumor that the San Diego Chargers might move to Los Angeles. The Chargers could be here for the 2016 season or the 2017 season, depending on traffic.

– Conan O’Brien

105 THE JEWISH HOME ď ł

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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ER! S E CO N D S U M M B AC K F O R O U R

107 Rocky Zweig

Zero Dark Flatbush

Their suits can’t be too [REDACTED], their socks can’t be too [REDACTED], and their hats need to be checked to see how [REDACTED] the brim is. were not only unrecognizable, but they hardly made any sense.

Enter Shoshana, my savior. She offered me this new venue, a forum wherein I would be freer to be myself, the edgy community gadfly. But I figured the pluses and minuses of my new home, The Jewish Home, would be reversed: while I’d have more freedom to write pretty much what I wanted to, at least somewhat impervious to the editor’s dreaded red pencil, I’d be receiving scant feedback from my readers, since: A. I don’t live in the community where most of the distribution takes place, and B. TJH does not publish many letters.

Which brings me all the way back to my first paragraph. I want to explain to you why there was no Rant last week. I’m not sure whether to address my readers as “all of you” or “both of you,” but anyway, here it is.

There was no Rant last week because the one I submitted was deemed inappropriate for publication.

YIKES! Here’s what happened: I’m very close to my younger daughter, and I value her opinion tre-

many people [REDACTED] that there was a guy in the lobby selling [REDACTED]! When I finally was able to discern where she was, I was unable to reach the subject because she was way on the other side of the hall and Jewish people are really out of their [REDACTED] and invite everyone they’ve ever met to their weddings. So there were more people in that room than in my hometown of Fairfield, Montana.

Eventually I was able to reach Miss [REDACTED] and give her the bad news: her outfit did not meet the community tzinius standards and that she would have to come with me.

“Come with you,” she sobbed, “but they’re only up to the soup!”

“We’re just going to Mrs. [REDACTED], the department seamstress. She’ll fix your hem and make sure it’s [REDACTED] inches below your [REDACTED]. She lives right around the corner on [REDACTED] Street. I should have you back before dessert.”

“I’m shouldn’t eat dessert anyway. I’m way too [REDACTED].”

“Oh, come on, you look just fine.”

“Easy for you to say; you’re not in the parsha!”

Now come on, guys…was that sooooo terrible?

To all my readers—or to both of you—wishing you a freilechen Purim.

Rocky Zweig has been writing since he was sixteen and was the Editor-in-Chief of the late and decidedly unlamented Modieinu, the mimeographed (remember mimeographs?) newspaper of the Tenth Avenue Pirchei of Boro Park, where he wrote everything from stories to news articles to hashkafa articles to...yes (now it can be told!)...letters to the editor.

Rocky was sixteen a very long time ago. He is the proud father of three marginally neurotic children. He has been married three — count ‘em — three times and has finally determined that he’s probably not very good at matrimonial bliss. He lives in his Fortress of Solitude in Flatbush with a small menagerie: Clarice, a European Starling; Rabbi Horatio LeZard, a Bearded Dragon; an aquarium filled with Lake Malawi African Cichlids; and a ten gallon tank that functions as a Home for Unwanted Goldfish, or H.U.G., collected over the years by his grandkids and great nieces and nephews at myriad street fairs and carnivals (rather than face the unpleasant task of flushing these unfortunate piscine creatures when they are eventually, inevitably ignored by their own obnoxious progeny, the parents simply call Uncle Rocky who then feeds them and cares for them until their ultimate natural demise three or four or even ten years down the pike). So apparently Rocky seems to get along better with animals than with his fellow homo sapiens. Or sapienses. Or whatever.

Rocky’s column will be appearing every other week in The Jewish Home.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

mendously. I generally send her everything I write. So a while back she made the observation that I was “losing my edge.” To me it was as if she had thrown down the gauntlet. This was right after Rant #3, “Swiss Fudge Conspiracy” about my dieting woes which, while perhaps amusing, was definitely quite benign. So I followed that up with “Last Night I Had the Strangest Dream,” which was about where chumros come from, which, had it been a letter in the [REDACTED], would have either never seen the light of day or been ripped to shreds by the public.

G-d bless The Jewish Home: they printed it in its entirety. Feeling emboldened, I decided to push the envelope (by the way, that’s what I wanted to call this column: “Pushing the Envelope.” Even though I never quite understood that expression). I decided to take on an even more sensitive subject: Tzinius.

Tzinius is and has always been a cornerstone of Yiddishkeit, not only for our young people but for all of us. What precipitated the article (and this is absolutely true) was an advertisement that appeared in a publication in Lakewood which read, in part: “ATTENTION ALL GIRLS! Make sure that all your clothing is four inches below your knee and receive a FREE ice cream!” (emphasis theirs).

Now mind you, I did not mean to mock the ad. I simply had my imagination run with it and extrapolate it into a story which involved “Tzinius Police.” I will now attempt to reconstruct some of the main parts of the storyline and see if I can sneak a very abridged version into the paper, pre-destroyed.

Hi, my name is [REDACTED]. My job in the squad is checking skirts. I measure their [REDACTED]. I have to see if they fall [REDACTED] inches below the young lady’s [REDACTED]. Other [REDACTED] in the squad check on the boys. For example, their suits can’t be too [REDACTED], their socks can’t be too [REDACTED], and their hats need to be checked to see how [REDACTED] the brim is and whether there is a [REDACTED] in the hatband.

I have a snitch named [REDACTED] who works as a waiter in the well-known catering hall, Ateres [REDACTED]. He called to tell me that a young lady named [OBVIOUSLY REDACTED] was wearing a dress of questionable [REDACTED]. I rushed right over but could not hear [REDACTED] when he tried to tell me the girl’s table number, because the band was louder than a [REDACTED] and was giving so

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T

hose of you who have been reading these pages may have noticed that one of my bi-weekly “Rants” was scheduled for last week, when, in fact, one did not appear. Perhaps I shouldn’t be bringing this up, since I have no way of knowing if anyone out there actually reads this stuff.

As you probably know by now, I used to be a frequent contributor to the Letters to the Editor section of [REDACTED]. Writing for them had some maylos and some chesronos. The main mayloh was that I got a tremendous amount of feedback: scores of readers responded to my letters, mostly to trash me, but that was okay. At least I knew I was reaching people and either making them think, entertaining them, or both.

Most of the positive reactions came from people who would stop me in the street and tell me how much they enjoyed my letters. It was very rewarding, indeed.

The main chisoron, however, and it was a big one, was that my letters were being edited to death.

I have no tainos to the publisher, [REDACTED]; he was walking a fine line between trying to make the paper a bit more liberal so he could stand out from the crowd, and placating the more right wing element of [REDACTED], which, of course, is a very large demographic. Furthermore, he had to run my stuff by rabbi [REDACTED] and rabbi [REDACTED], who often eviscerated my missives to the point where they

THE JEWISH HOME

The Rocky Rant

Humor

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Mordechai Schmutter

!

Y D N CA A Field Guide

P

urim is the holiday of candy. Ask any kid.

Okay, so there are lots of deeper meanings.

But we’re too hopped up on candy to care. The mitzvah of mishloach manos is to give each other foods that are ready to eat, so the general minhag is to give candy.

Candy doesn’t go bad, it doesn’t need refrigeration, and it comes in lots of pretty colors that aren’t found anywhere else in the so-called “natural” world. It also comes in lots of fun shapes to go with your “theme”— even if your theme is, “We accidentally bought the big mishlocah manos bags, and now we have to fill them.”

Some people eat so much candy that they can’t tell the difference between Haman and Mordechai. (HINT: Haman is the one with the giant cookie on his head.)

So maybe you’re in the store, shopping for candies to give out, or maybe you’ve come home from delivering mishloach manos to find eighteen bags on your doorstep, none of which has any label to tell you who they’re from, and some of which have candies that you’ve never seen before and that seem to have been designed by people who were so hopped up on candy they didn’t know what to do with themselves. All you know is that your kids are very excited. Hence this field guide.

I. A NOTE ABOUT NAMES It’s important to note, for the purposes of this guide, that not everyone uses the same names to describe their candies. For example, some people say “Winkies,” some say “Fizzers,” and hypochondriacs say “aspirin candy.”

One should also realize that most candies are basically different combinations of essentially the same ingredients, so it’s very hard to come up with new names in the first place. Sometimes it’s very obvious that the manufacturer just picked words out of a hat and said, “Good enough.” For example, there are: • “Crybabies,” which is the candy company saying straight out, “This is so sour, you’re going to cry.

Seriously. Candy that makes you CRY. Do you want it anyway?” And it turns out that people do.

• “Mike and Ikes,” whose name clearly has absolutely nothing to do with what it is. Best we can tell, the company was started by a guy named Michael and a guy named Dwight. Did they get together because their nicknames rhymed?

That’s a sound business strategy. But again, apparently it worked.

• “Nonpareils,” which are those chocolate discs with sprinkles on top. Yes, they have a name, and

this is it, even though no kid is ever going to call it that. Not only that, but it turns out the “L” is silent. Good luck.

• “Jawbreakers,” which is no doubt the least appetizing candy name. It’s like they said, “Well, we already have Lemon Heads, and Grape Heads, and Cherry Heads, and Apple Heads, and Orange Heads, and something called ‘Lemon Head and Friends’—like candy hangs out with its friends— and now we have this other candy and we can’t actually figure out what kind of fruit it tastes like. It doesn’t really taste like anything. So we certainly can’t name it after a kind of food. But Bob tried biting one the other day, and he ended up in the emergency room. How about we put some kind of spin on that?” And these, too, have been around forever. We candy consumers are not a very discriminating crowd.

II. A NOTE ABOUT FLAVORS A lot of adults say that all candy tastes the same, but that is really not true. There are actually more flavors than ever. Just a few short years ago, everything came in five flavors. There was: • Red, which tasted vaguely like cherry, • Orange, which tasted like flat orange soda, • Yellow, which tasted like furniture polish, • Purple, which did not taste or smell like any grapes that anyone has ever eaten, yet the bag insisted they were “grape,” and • Green, which tasted like limes, we assumed. No one really knew what “limes” were. We only knew they existed because of green candies.

Well, that and lemon-lime soda, which tasted exactly like lemon soda, the only difference being that one used artificial lemons, and the other also used artificial limes.

And that’s it. There wasn’t even blue. For some reason, they couldn’t figure out how to make an artificial blue color, although they still somehow managed to create green.

When it came to jelly beans, there was also: • Black, which tasted like black licorice, and which everyone gave to that one kid in the class who would eat them, and • White, which tasted like … regular, I guess… wax? I don’t know.

That was a much simpler time, and everyone liked reds.

But nowadays, there are so many flavors that it’s impossible to keep up. Even if you bite into a red jellybean, you don’t know. Is it going to be cherry? Strawberry? Pomegranate? Passion Fruit? Red apple? Cinnamon? A white, meanwhile, could be plain, but it could also be vanilla, coconut, cream soda, or baby wipes. And if it’s white with yellow dots, it’s buttered popcorn, because apparently, there’s a popcorn flavor now, and in this field guide’s opinion, once we’re making a nosh that tastes like another nosh, we have officially run out of ideas. There’s also a cola flavor. It’s like they ran out of healthy things to pretend it tastes like, so they said, “Let’s make it taste like something unhealthy. Who are we fooling, anyway?” So now they have “cola-flavored.”

“Is it made out of real cola?”

“No. It’s cola-flavored.”

III. BASIC SPECIES SUCKING CANDIES – This is your basic type of candy, popular with kids who have figured out that their parents will happily give them one whenever they want one as long as their throat hurts (which is why they’re always using their outside voice for no reason).

Apparently, sucking candies are magic.

LOLLYPOPS – They were invented by someone who said, “Sucking candies are good, but what’s missing is a big paper stick.”

The function of the stick, apparently, is to keep people from accidentally choking on the candy. But if that’s the case, then explain gum lollies. If the stick is there so the person won’t choke, why put a piece of chewed gum in the middle? What kid is choking on sucking candies, but you’re still willing to let him have gum?

GUM – Gum is useful for people who need to keep their mouths moving at all times. You might think it’s disgusting, but it’s better than having them constantly talking. This field guide loves all candy unequivocally, with the exception of popcorn jelly beans, but when it comes to gum, we draw the line. The issue with gum, in this field guide’s opinion, is that it loses its flavor.

And once it loses its flavor, there’s no appeal. The ap-

Apparently, they think that kids are bored while they're eating candy.

"We should give them something to do! How about a laser?!" we’ve never seen people actually eat after dinner. We think they kind of just exist to fill the extra section on candy platters. After-dinner mints are for people who don’t really get the concept of candy, as are SESAME CANDIES – But the worst is CANDY WITH TOYS ATTACHED – which is what happens when the manufacturers run out of new candy ideas altogether, so they’re like, “We should add a flashlight, or a monkey with cymbals, or a battery-powered fan!”

Great. I’m supposed to give this to my kids on Shabbos?

Because apparently, they think that kids are bored while they’re eating candy. They did the research, and they found that kids eating candy tend to climb the walls, so they said, “Obviously, these kids are bored.

We should give them something to do! How about a laser?!”

This field guide is not thrilled with the concept of toys on candy. Your child is going to bug you to buy it, not because he likes the candy, but because it’s also a toy, even though after a while, it’s still a toy but it’s not also a candy. Not to mention that he’s going to want to keep this sticky thing floating

have nothing to do with bears. Even though arguably, honey has nothing to do with bears either. Why, because bears eat honey? They eat lots of things. They also eat fish, mushrooms, and small mammals. And they drink water, not beer. And actually, people eat honey too, so honey isn’t specifically a bear thing.

Though the truth is that it doesn’t actually matter that your theme matches your costumes, because half the people you go to aren’t going to see your costumes anyway. You’re just going to leave the package on their doorstep, because they’re out bringing you your mishloach manos. Which is why you’re not going to see their costumes, or even necessarily realize that their package had a theme in the first place. It’s just one of eighteen packages you’re going to bring inside at once and dump on the table so you can make piles based on which things have to be finished before Pesach, as if it’s not ALL going to be finished before Pesach. But there’s no way you’re going to remember what came with what. You don’t even know what half the things are, although that’s not going to stop you from eating them. (We’ve been writing this column for six years, and we still have no idea what halvah is, but our friends keep sending it to us, because they think it’s funny.)

So at least you have this field guide for all the candy that you’ll be consuming this Purim. 

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

around your house long after he’s finished the candy.

But a large part of the candy world is governed by shape. For example, there’s: JELLY BEANS – although we don’t know why someone decided that the most appetizing form for a candy is the bean shape. “Kids love beans! Let’s do that!” And it was pretty successful. Who knew? This field guide has the same question about CHOCOLATE LENTILS – because if there’s one thing that kids love more than beans, it’s lentils. But there are also lots of other JELLY SHAPES – like bears and worms and fish and balls and rings and alphabet and cubes and fruit slices and cherries and “jacks” and teeth that look like healthy teeth, rather than how your teeth are going to look after you eat the jelly shapes, and little fat guys in blue and pink. Because apparently, a lot of candybuying consumers were saying, “Well, I like jellies, but I don’t like the shape. Beans? Really?”

This field guide can’t imagine why it’s necessary to have so many shapes that all taste basically the same. The only reason we can come up with is: mishloach manos. (See? It took four pages, but we got back to it.) Like if you decide to go with a “bear” theme because you have bear costumes, and so far you’ve come up with honey and teddy grahams and of course beer, and you’re out of ideas. So you need 75 different candies shaped like bears that technically

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market, in case you’re looking to get your wife a little something for your anniversary, there’s also RING POPS – so you don’t have to hold your lollies. You can be free to drive, or whatever. And if you don’t like holding your candy, there’s also CANDY SPRAY – which is for people who are too lazy to even eat the candy. They’re like, “I’m too tired.

Just spray it directly into my mouth.” It’s like Eisav with the lentils.

And of course there are the classics, like: FRUIT ROLL-UPS – which came from someone saying, “What if we invented a candy wrapper MADE OUT OF CANDY?” And then decided to just put it inside another wrapper and sell it without the candy.

And if you’re into FRUIT, you can also buy it

BY THE FOOT – these days. This is much better than the farmer’s market, which sells it by the pound.

It’s nice that the candy companies are selling fruit in such easily-measurable units. You can just walk into the store, and go, “I’d like about 35 feet of fruit, please,” and it doesn’t even matter which kind of fruit, because they all taste pretty much the same. There is also: LICORICE – which is mostly for people who don’t like candy. We’re pretty sure it’s not even a candy at all. It’s some kind of root. Another candy for people who don’t like candy is MINTS – and especially after-dinner mints, which

THE JEWISH HOME

peal of candy isn’t simply that “There’s candy in my mouth! As we speak! No, I don’t care if it doesn’t taste like anything!” The appeal of candy is its flavor, and by the time you spit out a piece of gum or accidentally shoot it across the room while trying to blow a bubble, your mouth already tastes like rubber. Sure, there are gums whose flavor lasts longer, such as Bazooka, which comes with a little joke written in tiny Hebrew handwriting that, when you figure out what it’s saying, is not actually funny. Am I supposed to be laughing?

The guy’s missing an eye! And that other one, with the turtleneck up to his nose – is he cold? Or is he just trying to get away with chewing gum in class? But the truth is that it doesn’t matter how long the flavor lasts, because the gum will still eventually lose its flavor, unless you swallow it first, in which case you’re inviting a whole other set of problems. There’s also: NOVELTY GUM – such as those big wax lips, which is basically a scented candle that you chew, and that gum that starts off as powder but if you chew it long enough (if you can figure out how to chew powder) it turns into gum. And there’s: BIG GUMBALLS – which are silly, because it’s not like they’re going to last longer because they’re bigger. Hello, they all last the same amount of time.

They’re gumballs. Also, in general, comically large candies are not all they’re cracked up to be. It’s never the good tasting candies they make comically large.

It’s just jawbreakers, and those lollies on those wooden sticks that take like a week to eat, and you end up with a big sticky line all the way to your ears. It’s like the companies said, “Well, this doesn’t taste good. How do we sell it anyway?” “I don’t know. Let’s make it bigger!”

TAFFY – is like gum, for people with shorter attention spans. Also, there’s something called TAFFY POPS -- which are taffies with a stick in them, so that no one will swallow them, I guess. Because we’ve always felt that the one thing taffy was missing was the big paper stick. So we you can bite into the stick by accident while chewing the taffy. But on that topic, there’s also FIZZ LOLLIES – which are basically Winkies with sticks, so you won’t accidentally swallow the Winkies.

LOLLIES WITH FIZZ IN THE MIDDLE – this exists.

PACKETS OF FIZZ THAT YOU EAT BY DIPPING A FIZZ LOLLY INTO THEM – Because the fizz lolly doesn’t taste enough like fizz, so you have to put additional fizz on it.

JUST PLAIN FIZZ – Yes, that’s it. It’s like the companies just gave up, and said, “Look, it’s all sugar anyway. Why are we fooling ourselves? Why bother coming up with candy? The kids are going to eat it anyway.” It’s like the person who was supposed to come up with a new candy was sick that day. “Here, stick some fizz in these straws, and seal the ends. And in these little plastic bottles. And in these containers shaped like fruit.” They also shape fizz into CANDY NECKLACES – because we have to wear our candy now, although the rubber bands aren’t quite stretchy enough, and if you try to put them over your head, the band rips, sending candies flying everywhere four weeks before Pesach.

But if you successfully get it over your head, you can suck on your necklace, and end up with chalk marks on your collar the rest of the day. And speaking of candy jewelry, which is a big

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

110 Come join tens of thousands of Fathers and Sons from Eretz Yisroel and around the globe learning...

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 Thursday • 14 Adar • Purim Day • March 5, 2015 Learning @ 12:00 PM Followed by Purim Gelt Raffles! (Mincha @ 1:00pm) Learning will take place at Yeshiva of South Shore (Cong. Anshei Chesed Beis Medrash)

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Health & Fitness

Aliza Beer, MS, RD

An Ode to Purim

A

n Ode to Purim It’s that time of the year again Girls are princesses and boys dangerous men To masquerade oneself is the theme Limitless hamantashen and alcohol is our dream Like all good things, the day does come to an end Disguises are removed and we must try to mend It’s feasible to gain five pounds in that one meal Subsequently, diet and exercise will help you deal It took only hours to gain those pounds But on the treadmill, you will do many rounds So how do we survive the day without being a fress?

I will tell you the secret to your success Treat Purim like an anniversary, celebration, or birthday Have a couple of treats, but don’t completely stray Making choices in life is what we do Eating to oblivion is not being a good Jew Eat breakfast just like on any typical day Fruit will be snacks, up your blood sugar will stay You will sit down to the seudah not very hungry at all Mission accomplished; you are the smartest one of all!

During the meal be sure to treat yourself to something yummy I don’t advise you totally deprive your tummy (that would be crummy!)

Pretend it’s a Shabbos meal, not a food fest Ultimately, you will achieve enormous success!

However, if you succumb and ignore my advice Don’t despair, diet and exercise once or twice The damage is done, and is not irreversible If you need extra help, I’m always available!

To my wonderful readers and patients, wishing you a happy Purim!

Aliza Beer is a registered dietician with a master’s degree in nutrition. She has a private practice in Cedarhurst, NY. Patients’ success has been featured on the Dr. Oz show. Aliza can be reached at alizabeer@gmail.com.

111 THE JEWISH HOME 

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112 114

Celebrating the Purim Miracle with a Meal of Minis Purim is a busy day. With megillah, mishloach manos and the myriad stops we make along the way, there’s a lot of “comings and goings” from house to house. I like to make finger foods to keep on my table during the day. This way my family—and guests—have something to nosh on besides for the candy that comes in waves. It’s also great to set your seudah with some “mini’s” so people have something to enjoy while waiting for more guests to arrive.

Freilechen Purim!

Excellent Egg Rolls Ingredients 1 tsp olive oil 2 cups savoy cabbage, chopped 2 cups shredded carrots 2 cups bean sprouts 1 can water chestnuts, chopped 2 tbsp scallions, sliced 1 tsp fresh ginger, grated 2 tbsp soy sauce 1 tbsp cornstarch ¼ cup water 14 egg roll wraps Sweet chili dipping sauce or sweet and sour sauce, for dipping Preparation Preheat oven to 400°F. Heat the olive oil in a large skillet over medium heat. Once hot,

add the cabbage, sprouts, carrots, chestnuts and ginger to the pan and cook, stirring frequently for 4-5 minutes, until the vegetables just begin to wilt but still remain a little bit crisp. Mix the cornstarch with the water and mix thoroughly. Add the cornstarch mixture and soy sauce to the pan along with the scallions.

Cook for an additional 1-2 minutes or until the sauce thickens. Remove from heat and let cool.

Place two tablespoons of the cooled mixture on the center of the egg roll wrap. Fold the bottom up over the filling. Next, fold the two sides over, making it look like an envelope, then roll it up.

Spray a baking sheet with cooking spray. Place the rolled up egg rolls on a baking sheet. Once you have rolled them all, spray the top

Franks in Blanks Ingredients 1 12-ounce package fully cooked frankfurters 1 8-ounce sheet frozen puff pastry, thawed 1/3 cup whole-grain mustard

of each egg roll with cooking spray.

Bake for 8-10 minutes at 400°F, then turn them over. Bake for an additional 5-7 minutes or until crispy and golden brown. Serve with sweet chili sauce or sweet and sour sauce.

Preparation Heat oven to 400° F. Cut the frankfurters in quarters lengthwise, then in half crosswise.

Cut the puff pastry into strips 3 inches long and 1 inch wide. Roll the sausage pieces in the pastry strips and transfer to a parchment-lined baking sheet. Bake until puffed and golden brown, 15 to 20 minutes.

Transfer to a platter and serve with the mustard for dipping. continued on page 114

Continued on page 114

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For children birth - 3 years with special needs

Services Provided l

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Routines Based Interventions & Collaborative Coaching

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TO REFER YOUR CHILD TO THE EARLY INTERVENTION PROGRAM CALL 311.

This Early Intervention Program (EIP) is a public program for children under the age of three who are either suspected of having or at risk for developmental delays or disabilities. EIP is funded by NYS and NYC. All EIP services are provided at no cost to parents. Health insurance may be used for approved services. A child’s eligibility for the program can be determined only by state-approved evaluators under contract, and all services must be authorized by the NYC Early Intervention Program.

For more information about CHALLENGE: T. 718.851.3300 W. challenge-ei.com

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Early Intervention Services

114 FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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Chicken Satay with Peanut Sauce

Asian-Style Popcorn Chicken Ingredients 8 chicken cutlets, cut into bite-size cubes 1 cup cornstarch 2 stalks Thai basil leaves, optional Oil, for deep-frying Marinade 2 cloves garlic, minced 1 inch piece ginger, minced 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon sugar 1 tablespoon soy sauce 1 teaspoon hoisin sauce Scant ¼ teaspoon ground black pepper Preparation Mix all the ingredients for the marinade in a big bowl, stir to combine well. Add the chicken, coat well and marinate for 30 minutes.

Heat 2-3 inches of the oil in a pan or stock pot for deep-frying. Coat the chicken with the cornstarch evenly. Shake off the excess. Deepfry the chicken until they turn golden brown, remove from the oil with a strainer or slotted spoon, draining the excess oil by laying them on a wire rack or a dish lined with paper towels.

In a clean pan or skillet, add the basil leaves, if you are using, and stir a few times before adding the chicken back into the pan or skillet.

Remove from heat and serve immediately on long skewers with dipping sauce.

Ingredients 2 dark meat chicken cutlets, but into 12 strips 1 tsp toasted sesame oil 1 teaspoon soy sauce 1 garlic clove, minced ½ teaspoon red pepper flakes Coarse salt and ground black pepper For the Sauce: 2 tablespoons smooth natural peanut butter 2 tablespoons “lite” coconut milk 1 tablespoon lime juice 2 teaspoons reduced-sodium soy sauce 1 teaspoon brown sugar ½ teaspoon crushed red pepper, or to taste

Pecan Pie Bites Looking for something sweet?

These are a yummy way to enjoy a sugary end to the meal—bite sized!

Ingredients 3 cups chopped pecans ¾ cup sugar

Preparation In a bowl, toss chicken with sesame oil, soy sauce, garlic, and 1/4 teaspoon of the red-pepper flakes. Season with salt and pepper.

Thread each chicken strip lengthwise onto a skewer.

Heat grill pan over high. Working in batches, brush pan with oil, and cook chicken until opaque throughout, 1 to 2 minutes per side.

Serve chicken skewers with dipping sauce.

To make the dipping sauce: whisk all ingredients for the sauce in a bowl until smooth.

¾ cup dark corn syrup 3 large eggs, lightly beaten 2 tablespoons melted margarine 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 1/8 teaspoon salt 5 (2.1-oz.) packages frozen mini-phyllo pastry shells or mini pie shells Preparation Preheat oven to 350°F. Bake pecans in a single layer in a shallow pan 8 to 10 minutes or until toasted and fragrant.

Stir together sugar and corn syrup in a medium bowl.

Stir in pecans, eggs, melted margarine, vanilla and salt.

Spoon about 1 heaping teaspoonful pecan mixture into each pastry or pie shell, and place on 2 large baking sheets for 20-22 minutes, or until set.

Let cool completely (around 30 minutes) before storing in an airtight container.

115 THE JEWISH HOME 

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118

Parenting Pearls

Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW

Quality Time I am a rebbe in a local yeshiva. Although the pay is decent, in order to make ends meet I teach secular studies in another yeshiva in the afternoon and tutor boys at night. As you can imagine, I am quite tired when I arrive home. I often learn with my children while I am eating supper or eat quickly myself and learn with them for a few minutes afterwards. There are many nights when I don’t end up learning with some or all of my children.

I know how important it is to spend time with one’s children (I once heard some-

one say that to a child love is spelled T-IM-E), but in order to maintain the average standard of living including paying yeshiva and camp tuitions, I feel as if I just don’t have much time to give them.

Rabbi Staum Replies: I once asked this very question to Rabbi Mordechai Finkleman, mashgiach of Yeshiva Ohr Hachaim and a personal rebbe. Rabbi Finkleman is busy helping klal Yisroel, aside from attending simchos of talmidim, etc. I asked him how he

found time for each of his children when they were younger. His response was that the most important component of spending time with children is quality—not quantity. Five or ten minutes of undivided attention can be worth more than an hour of fragmented attention.

Our children today have a lot of competition for their parents’ time. The phone is ringing, there are things that need to be taken care of, and unfortunately many of us can’t stop ourselves from checking our phones.

A new grandfather was taking his grandchildren to the park. It had been a few decades since he had taken his children to the park. As he entered the playground he was pleasantly surprised to see a whole group of young children on the swings being pushed by their fathers. That wasn’t the case when he was a young parent. But as he came closer he realized that virtually every father was on the phone.

They were there but they weren’t there.

A wise friend told my wife that she began a program in her home called “shmoozy time.” Every night when putting her children to sleep she spends a few minutes with each child speaking about whatever the child desires. With nine children in the family, it isn’t easy to spend focused time with each child but somehow she manages. The children look forward to it immensely. They could lose the privilege with negative behavior and they don’t want to, so it was a great incentive as well.

Eva Sandler, who lost her husband and two children in the horrific shooting outside a yeshiva in Tolouse, France, was interviewed shortly after the tragedy. One of the things she said was: “I can tell people that they need to pay more attention to their husband, or children, that they don’t understand how important this is. Every night I would make sure to recite the ‘Shema’ prayer with my children. On that day, I was with my parents, and I said to my husband that I didn’t say ‘Shema’ with the children. I told him that I would make sure to say it with them the following night. But there was no following night.”

I remember on one occasion I was driving with my eight-year-old son sitting in the back seat. I felt that I had to make conversation and I began asking him how school was, how things were generally, etc. At one point he looked up at me and said, “Abba, why are you asking me all of these strange questions?” We don’t always have to talk. Just spending time together, especially in an enjoyable manner, is very valuable to our children.

We are all pressed for time. Whatever time we do set aside to spend with our children we should make sure that we are really there.

Rabbi Dani Staum, LMSW, is the Rabbi of Kehillat New Hempstead. He is also fifth grade Rebbe and Guidance Counselor in ASHAR in Monsey, and Principal of Mesivta Ohr Naftoli of New Windsor, NY. Rabbi Staum offers parenting classes based on the acclaimed Love & Logic Program. He can be reached at stamtorah@ gmail.com. His website is www.stamtorah.info.

119 THE JEWISH HOME 

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Dr. Deb

Deb Hirschhorn, Ph.D.

Family Cutoffs

R

emember last week’s main characters? There were Menachem and Alice and their child, Joey.

I didn’t put a spotlight on Menachem; he had a very small part in the story. So I am going to ask you to guess, just for fun, based on the little we have seen of Menachem’s interactions with Joey, what kind of relationship you think they have when Joey is 35?

It wouldn’t surprise you, would it, if they don’t have one?

Family Cutoffs May Be the Result of Abuse When people give up on a relationship that “should” be close, it is called a family cutoff. I will be speaking about this topic on March 3 in the Food For Thought series at Traditions.

Oh, you are surprised at the turn of events between Menachem and his son?

Their relationship represents a frequent pattern: First, for whatever reason, a child is spoiled. Sometimes it is due to the pas-

sionate desire on the part of a parent to give heaps and tons of love to a child and that parent just cannot see the place for discipline. Maybe the parent grew up lonely and feels that loving a child fights off that loneliness. Maybe a parent had parents who disciplined too harshly and the current parent has a negative visceral reaction to any discipline as a result.

Whatever the reason, when the pattern begins with a lack of discipline, the child, who momentarily feels like King of the Hill, ends up the loser for it. Because Step Two is that the parents can’t stand their child – and lets him know.

They do just what Menachem did in last week’s story: they start with name-calling and put-downs. I’ve heard all kinds of put-downs from parents who are frustrated beyond belief with their child.

I once had a father tell me in all innocence, “I’m so good to him; I’d do anything for him. I can’t understand why he won’t do one little thing I ask of him.

You’d think he’d learn by example.”

No, they don’t learn by example.

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They need consequences. By the way, the consequences don’t have to be dramatic.

My own father, z”l, would just look at me in a certain way that would make me feel sad to have disappointed him and that would be enough. But I am jumping off the topic here. The topic is how cut-offs happen. So in the case of Alice and Menachem, both parents begin by spoiling their child, then they browbeat their child for being a brat, and finally, the child, with good reason, wants nothing more to do with their abusive parents.

That’s a cut-off.

Unfortunately, because he was spoiled, Joey is slated to carry on the child abuse that he received from his father. He is both a victim and abuser. He has cut off his parents but his children may very well carry on that tradition.

Our Torah delineates cut-offs that occur for this reason (abuse, bad character): Yishmael was cut off. Today, his descendants are not only retaliating against us but against each other within that family. Eisav was cut off and his descendant, Amalek, is someone we are required to cut off as well. Yosef was unfortunately cut off but the story ended on an upbeat note as it turns out that the brothers’ assessment of his character and potential place in the family was incorrect.

Cut-offs can occur for other reasons, too.

Family Cutoffs May Be t he Result of Encouraging Selfishness If you imagine that father I mentioned above – the one who thinks his child should learn to be kind and generous because he, the father, is kind and generous – as a parent who gives everything and receives nothing, then when he turns 85, he has the potential to be cut off from his son. This is not because the father has ever been abusive but rather because he did not teach his child to be a giver. This can be one explanation for the nursing homes with no visitors to their elderly occupants: parents unwittingly encouraged selfishness.

Chazal cite Dovid HaMelech for being this type of father – and it led to mutiny in the ranks. His children fought for his throne and were not bothered by the thought of patricide. That is an extreme case of the over-generous parent who expects nothing back.

We are obligated to teach our children to honor us; how else will they know how to do it? It can’t be done abusively,

but it will not happen just because we set an example. We must actively impart this knowledge to our children. When they are very young, we might have to repeat ourselves frequently and that might need to be followed up with consequences.

This, too, is for another article.

Family Cutoffs May Be the Result of Judgmentalism Many families are composed of well-meaning people who have learned the art of give and take but they pass too-quick judgment on each other. They don’t intend to cut one another off but somehow, time erodes a delicate relationship.

Not all judgmentalism is wrong.

For example, let’s assume that a family member was doing something not within the law. Perhaps relatives might want to avoid that person. Without abuse or selfishness, the cut-off person may be consuming illicit substances or engaged in other undesirable behavior. You may have tried repeatedly to convince the person to make changes with no visible results for your efforts. What do you do then?

Yosef’s brothers were in that unpleasant spot. Yosef, at 17, thought he would win kudos with his father – and perhaps correct his brothers for what he perceived to be their errors – by bringing “evil reports” of their behavior back to their father, Yaakov. They, in turn, were worried that such a person, speaking loshon hara about them, would ruin the family’s chances to build the nation that their grandfather, Avrohom, told them was the family destiny.

What should they do? They meant well in casting him into a pit. History determined that their judgmentalism was a mistake. Interestingly, centuries later, Esther HaMalka repairs the damage once and for all. Please find out how this came about – and when cut-offs are healthy and when they are not on March 3 at my talk.

Dr. Deb Hirschhorn, a Marriage & Family Therapist and best-selling author of The Healing Is Mutual: Marriage Empowerment Tools to Rebuild Trust and Respect—Together, is proud to announce that readers of The Jewish Home will receive a $50 discount on every visit to her Woodmere office. Attend the Food For Thought lectures at Traditions Restaurant in Lawrence on Tuesdays at 12:30 PM. (There is a lovely optional lunch menu for $12 cash.) Any questions, call 646-54-DRDEB or check out her website at http://drdeb.com. All stories in Dr. Deb’s articles are fabricated.

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Roman Aminov, Esq.

Effects of a Divorce on Estate Planning

I

n addition to the emotional and financial ramifications of a divorce,

there are important estate planning implications for clients contemplat-

ing divorce or separation. Along with selling, dividing, and re-titling assets

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comes the necessity to reevaluate your estate plan. “Why?” you might ask.

Here are a few important reasons to sit down with an estate planning attorney during this critical time in your life: Beneficiary Designations When a New Yorker gets a divorce, all beneficiary dispositions they made to their former spouse, such as naming them as a beneficiary of life insurance or IRA, are automatically revoked by law under EPTL 5-1.4, unless,

of course, the language in the governing instrument specifically states otherwise. Therefore, after a divorce decree has been issued, the bequest to the former spouse is revoked, and the next beneficiary listed would be entitled to the asset. However, if you fail to list successor beneficiaries, the asset would become a part of your “probate” estate and would require an estate administration or probate proceeding before it is passed to your loved ones. Why is that so bad? A couple of reasons: First, probate and estate administration proceedings are time-consuming and can get expensive. Naming beneficiaries makes the process faster and easier for your heirs. Second, if you have certain tax-deferred accounts such as IRAs and 401Ks, there are negative tax consequences if there are no beneficiaries listed on your accounts. As an important side point, if you have minor children, instead of listing them as beneficiaries, it is better to set up a minor’s trust, either in your will or a separate living trust, and name that minor’s trust-

123 No column is a substitute for competent legal advice. Please consult with the attorney of your choice concerning specific legal questions you may have.

Roman Aminov, Esq. is an attorney who helps people achieve peace of mind by safeguarding their assets. He can be reached for a consultation at (347)7662685.

In-Laws While a divorce automatically revokes your ex-spouse’s designation as beneficiary or agent, it does not remove any of the ex-spouse’s fam-

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ily or friends as your agent or beneficiaries. Consequently, if your will appoints your ex-spouse’s sister to be the guardian of your children or if you left any inheritance to any of your former spouse’s family or friends, a divorce does not revoke those selections. So unless you are in love with your ex-in-laws, a divorce is a good time to review your estate plan.

General Review Tax laws change, families get bigger (and sometimes, unfortunately, smaller), and clients’ goals shift.

Therefore, I advise clients to have their estate plans reviewed once every five years, or sooner, if there is they

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if you pass away before you are legally divorced, your spouse would be entitled to whatever your current estate plan gives them. In addition, even though the law provides for automatic revocation, some financial institutions may choose to pay out to the beneficiary they have on file despite the law.

For these reasons, it is important to speak with a wills and trusts attorney if you are contemplating a divorce.



Advance Directives A divorce also revokes any rights your ex-spouse had to act as an executor under your last will or as an agent under your healthcare proxy or power of attorney. It is important to revisit these essential estate planning documents to make sure that you have someone else appointed to manage your affairs if you become sick or pass away.

experience a significant change in financial or familial status. The process of getting divorced affects both aspects of a person’s life and provides a good opportunity to sit down with an estate planning attorney to make sure that your family and your assets are protected going forward.

It is important to remember that the automatic revocation provisions of EPTL 5-1.4 only take effect upon the completion of the divorce proceeding;

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ee as the beneficiary. This will allow you to exert greater control over how and when your children receive their inheritance.

Your Money

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When the State’s Your New Best Friend

S

tate governments collect billions of dollars in taxes every year, and they work just as hard to protect their revenue base as their friends at the IRS. Sometimes that means putting lots of eggs in one basket — then watching that basket very, very carefully. But one state acknowledges taking that particular strategy to a new

level. In a move that falls somewhere between “I can’t believe they haven’t done this already” and “Wow, that sure sounds like stalking,” the Connecticut Department of Revenue Services has revealed they’re “keeping an eye” on their top 100 individual taxpayers to make sure they don’t leave the state — and take their taxable

Allan J. Rolnick, CPA

income with them.

Connecticut residents boast the fourth-highest median household income of any state in the country. It takes $678,000 per year to join the much-discussed “top 1%” club, compared to $389,000 for the United States as a whole.

But we’re not talking about dime-a-dozen Wall Streeters here. We’re not talking “the millionaire next door.” No, we’re talking true fat cats. James Bond-villain money.

Guys who are literally buried in so much

cash it would take an entire village full of torch-wielding peasants to storm them out of their castles.

Let’s take a closer look at one of the state’s new pals. Steve Cohen is a hedge fund manager who lives in Greenwich in a 35,000 square foot home with an ice-skating rink the size of the one at Rockefeller Center and a two-hole golf course. He charges his clients four percent of the assets he manages, plus up to 50% of their gains.

Forbes magazine reports that he hauled in $2.3 billion in 2014. (That’s right, “billion” with a “b.”) The Nutmeg State’s top tax rate is 6.7%. A little fourth-grade math tells you the state siphoned $154.1 million out of Cohen’s bulging pockets.

Now let’s put that tax bill in a broader perspective. Connecticut’s budget for Fiscal 2013 was $28.1 billion. That means Cohen picked up more than half a percent of the state government’s entire tab for the year, all by himself. (Ironically, last year Cohen closed his fund to outside investors in the wake of an insider-trading scandal, which will virtually eliminate his earned income. We doubt that federal prosecutors were thinking about his state tax bill when they filed charges against his fund!)

Cohen’s income may have vaulted him to the top of the heap. But he’s hardly the only super-earner to make it rain in Connecticut. One accounting firm with offices in Greenwich reports preparing tax returns for three unidentified Nutmeggers with billion-dollar incomes. Ray Dalio, head of Bridgewater Associates, raked in $900 million in 2013. (Sure, that sounds like a lot, but it’s actually down from $3 billion in 2011). Paul Tudor Jones, who lives in a Monticello-inspired mansion with a 25-car garage, scored $700 million.

“There are probably a handful of people, five to seven people, who if they just picked up and went, you would see that in the revenue stream,” says Kevin Sullivan, the Department’s commissioner. Two years ago, Sullivan adds, his office heard that one particular hedge-funder might be leaving and set up a meeting to urge him to stay. The manager moved (d’oh!), but agreed to keep his company back in “the little state that could.”

Would you be flattered if you knew the government was watching your tax payments like a hawk? Or would you be creeped out? Either way, you’d probably want to pay less so you could disappear from that particular radar. So make sure you have a plan to keep as much as you legally can, no matter where you earn your income.

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

125 THE JEWISH HOME

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126

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS

Can You Flip Your Mind?

I

f I stretch out my hand and give you charity, I am doing the right thing.

But if you extend your hand to ask from me, I’m not doing as good a thing. But then again, if it’s on Purim that’s OK, because everything’s turned around. So I guess on Purim I should wait to be

asked in order to do the better thing!

It’s tough enough getting it right all year-round. Now we have to deal with v’nahapochu—everything reversed!

Bad is good. Good is bad. Serious is bad. Silly is good. Normal is nuts.

Nuts is normal. It’s a day where we are supposed to recognize things aren’t

what we think they are.

Think about this. You prepare for hours — cook, spice, prep, primp! You look like a million dollars. Your food looks amazing. Then your company shows up – early and stays late. You work to be “on” the whole night. By the end of the night, you are totally ex-

hausted and wiped out! So seriously, when your husband asks, what else I can do for you? Are you going to say: “Oh, it would make me sooooo happy to do this all over again tomorrow night!” What in the world was Queen Esther up to?!

And then suggesting fasting for three days? I think I’m a hero when I make it through one hour without food!

And on a full day fast I figure I’m like right up there with the angels. So who could last three whole days, especially without at least one Hershey bar?

What about Mordechai? Who wouldn’t need to stop back home once in a while? Mordechai was out there in the palace courtyard, 24/7. Didn’t he want to like ... go for a little run or grab a cup of coffee or something? Haman should have been kissing him, not criticizing him. After all, where do you get that kind of free security service for the palace?

Haman started the concept of a lottery which put into action something that goes like this: everyone gives and only one person wins. If Purim flips it over – everyone wins!

Things are kind of turned on their head on Purim.

Instead of dressing up people are throwing up. Instead of cheering the baal koray in shul, they’re booing him!

Instead of kids being quieted down, they are riled up. What’s all the reversal about?

It’s about one thing! We just don’t know what’s going on in this world.

Only G-d does. There is no normal.

What we see is not what we get. G-d can turn it all around in a minute! A three day fast can seem like no time!

And a challenge can disappear in the blink of an eye – if G-d so chooses.

Let that sink in as you go wild on Purim! And what appears to be good or bad may not really be so in the giant scheme of things.

Purim: It’s not a big lottery with all unknown!

V’nahapochu – reverse your thinking! Purim > “Mirup.” M I - R U - in control? P – ositively not… everything is happening for a reason!

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@ rosenwalds.com

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*Rancho Bernardo Spa Pool & Cabanas

The Upscale Experience Awaits.

White Oaks Resort Niagara Falls, Canada

Rancho Bernardo Inn San Diego, California

“Extraordinary would be the only way to describe it. The resort that has it all.”

“A peaceful haven in the heart of the mountains.”

-Canada Select Ontario’s Top Five Star Hotel Resort

-Condé Nast Traveler Worlds Top 100 Resorts

info@upscale-getaways.com www.upscale-getaways.com

1.877.895.3210

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

NO ONE OFFERS AN EXPERIENCE LIKE “UPSCALE”.

LET US SHOW YOU WHY.



PESACH 2015

THE JEWISH HOME

presents

THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

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TJH Classifieds SERVICES

SERVICES Buying or Refinancing a Home?

Pre-Approval letters that brokers trust!

Put as little as 3% down.

Borrow up to 90% with no MI! We can beat any written offer!

Specializing in very difficult scenarios Call Daniel at Landmark Funding Group.

NMLS#367291 at 718-663-7202 All loans arranged through 3rd party lenders.

Experience Math Teacher Available to Tutor All subjects, algebra, geometry, Math A, Math B, Trigonometry, Calculus etc. Guaranteed improvement, first hour free. Shomer Shabbat.

Call Yossi at 516-581-3930

The Children’s Clothing Gemach in Cedarhurst Is fully stocked for boys/girls in sizes newborn-teen To make an appointment please call/text 516-712-7735

SERVICES

SERVICES

Photos 4 your Simcha Professional Photography and Video We love what we do and it shows in our work!

Competitively priced!

Check out our website & specials. www.photos4yoursimcha.com or call Yaakov 718-868-1800

Hair Course Learn how to wash and style hair and wigs Hair and wig cutting, wedding styling Private lessons or in a group Call Chaya 718-715-9009

Psychotherapist

Depression, anxiety, marriage, low self-esteem, Adults/Children Professional/Confidential Kenneth J. Levin, LCSW Insurance Accepted (516) 546-9170

We Buy Old Antique Seforim and Libraries

Yiddish Home Study Program: The new book Yiddish in 10 Lessons along with 2 CD’s has just been released to easily learn to read, write and speak the Yiddish language.

Call Chaim at 516 924 7694 or www.conversationalyiddish,com You can also sign up to receive a Free Weekly Taste of Yiddish

Please call 732-232-1790

Local & Long Distance Insured. Experienced. Friendly.

Call Shalom Gerber (347) 276-7422

Frum mother Available to babysit during morning hours (till 12) at her home in Far Rockaway.

Early morning available. All ages Call or text 718-290-3848

“Kosher” Yoga & Licensed Massage Therapy The Peaceful Presence Studio 436 Central Avenue, Cedarhurst Separate men/ women Private sessions/ Women’s Tai Chi www.peacefulpresence.com 516-371-3715

HAIR & MAKE UP BY BRACHA BRAVER Weddings, Sheitels, Make Up, Waves, Up-dos, Braids, Color, Highlight, Cut, Wash & Set Best prices guaranteed Years of experienced, references available 516-943-0133 or 646-915-2527

Keep Calm and Get Organized!

Organizer. home. closet. playroom. kitchen. garage.

Call today to get started - Special Low Rates Call Miriam 347-684-0338

Professional Organizer and Time Management Coach Enjoy and learn to organize your home, business, or car – Less mess = Less Stress Sara Koppelman 917-579-7049

SBG MOVING LLC

950 Broadway

Woodmere, NY 11598 www.pugatch.com

BARRY PUGATCH

Commercial Properties For SALE

REAL ESTATE FOR SALE BORO PARK FOR SALE 54th St. (Bet. 11th & 12th Ave.,) 2 family, attached, 5 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms, built-in closets, Kosher Kitchen & Passover Kitchen, Mint Condition. Asking 1.6 Mil. Serious buyers only.

Email: Goingrealty@Gmail.com HEWLETT: PRICE REDUCED!!!

Legal 2 Family On Large Property, 5BR, 2 Full Bath Colonial, New Hardwood Floors, SD#14, Close To All…$420K Call Carol Braunstein (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com

Carol Braunstein

(516) 2 9 5 - 3 0 0 0 www.pugatch.com

Struggling with Shalom Bayis?

The Shalom Bayis Hotline 732-523-1112 Caring rabbanim answering your questions for free.

So far very positive results BS’D!

Call or Text

(516) 592-2206

cbraunstein@pugatch.com

WAREHOUSE FOR SALE

7,000SF

+/2 Offices, 2 Bathrooms OH Doors, Hi Ceilings  Plenty of Parking

Outstanding CH Colonial, 3BR, 2.5 BA, Lovely 4BR, 2.5 Bath Cape, Eik, FDR, Eik, FDR, Fin Bsmt, SD#14…$649K Den W/Fplc, Patio, SD#14…$390K

MIXED USE BLDG FOR SALE

Prime Location 6 Units - 3 Stores

2 Apartments, 1 Office  Very Well Maintained If You Are Interested In Buying, Selling Or Leasing Call The Local Commercial EXPERTS 516-295-3000

Lovely 4BR Exp-Ranch On O/S Property, Mint 6BR, 5 Bath Split, W/Spectacular Eik, Lr, FDR, Den, SD#14...$489K Waterviews, Eik, Den, SD#14...$849K

CALL ME FOR A FREE M A R K E T A N A LY S I S F O R YOUR HOME!!!

LO OK I N G T O B U Y OR SE LL? C A LL M E T O DAY ! !!

TJH Classifieds 2 Bedroom Apartment In Far Rockaway (near BBY) Ideal for Shomer Shabbos couple or for 2-3 girls Please call 516-569-1150

WOODMERE: 2 Family House In Prime Location, 5BR, 3 Full Baths, Den, Hardwood Floors Throughout, New Roof & More, Near All, SD#14…$625K Call Carol Braunstein - (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com

3 Bedroom Apartment in Far Rockaway New to market, Very good condition 2 bathrooms, 2 porches, washer, dryer 2nd floor in a 3 family house (parking available) Call: 516-569-1150

COMMERCIAL REAL ESTATE

Cedarhurst Apartment Share Available for Frum Female 2 bedroom apartment in lovely area, 2nd floor of house Shomer Shabbat, kosher & pet friendly $800 monthly + security Please call: (917) 330-5470

COMMERCIAL PROPERTY IN LAWRENCE: 1,400 +/-SF Retail Store On Central Ave, Rent Slashed!!! $2,900/Mo. For Lease…

Call For Details (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com COMMERCIAL PROPERTY IN HEWLETT: Turn Key Restaurant In Great Location, Long Term Lease, Lo Key Money, Beautiful Build Out, For Sale…Call For Details (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com

Apartment for Rent in 2 family house 4 Bedroom 2 Bath in Cedarhurst Close to the LIRR, Shuls, and Shopping Huge rooms!

Asking $2800 plus utilities Call Daniel 516-900-3867 cedarhurstrentals@gmail.com

COMMERCIAL PROPERTY IN WOODMERE: 4,400 +/- SF Brand New Construction, Office Building With 22 Car Parking, For Sale…

Call For Details - (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com

PLAINVIEW

4 Houses. Brnd New Construction. 4 rs. 5BR, 3 full bths + 2 half bths. EIK, LR/DR, den area off kit. Lndry on 2nd r.

Full bsmnt w/ half bath. 4th oor has prvte brs and bth.

Prvte drvwy. Call Chaya Moller for a showing. 516-506-3347

$625K

21 WILLIAMS CT.

FAR ROCKAWAY MOTIVATED SELLER!! 3BR/1.5BA SD near FR schools and shuls. Newly renovated, full BSMT. $389,000 Call Melissa @ 347-757-0224

OFFICES

CEDARHURST TOP LOCATIONS

#1 Far Rockaway and 5 Towns Rental Specialists

420 Central Ave., Cedarhurst NY 11516

Milky Forst nc.

Properties IAvrohom "Avi" Sobel

Avrohom “Avi” Sobel Office: 516.239.0306 Cell:

347.524.6530

Office: 516.239.0306 Cell: 347.524.6530

Email: asobel18@gmail.com milkyforstproperties.com

LAWRENCE

Stunning renovation completed. Gorgeous cntr INVESTMENT PROPERTIES FOR SALE hall. 5 lrg bds. Mstr suite w/ sitting rm. Gourmet Short sales, bank-owned, foreclosures, Kosher Kitchen with Great Room. LR w/ Frplc, auction properties, land. Single-family or huge custom DR. 4 full bths & full bsmnt. Call multi-family. Inventory is always changing.

Sherri for further details . 516-297-7995 CASH ONLY. Call Melissa @ 347-757-0224.

FAR ROCKAWAY

M ILKY FORST PROPERTIES INC.

Licensed Real Estate Salesperson

56 MURIEL

APARTMENT RENTALS

Do you know of any gemachs in our area?

Include them in our TJH gemach list!

Email FR5Tgemachs gmail.com.

Licensed 420 Central Ave., Cedarhurst, NY 11516

FAR ROCKAWAY Young, legal, 2 family semi-detached, 3 over 4 bedrooms.

5 full baths. 1st oor is a duplex with a huge eat in kitchen w/radiant heat. Large master bedroom with bath..W/D hookup in both apts. Call Sherri 516-297-7995 $699K

Real Estate Salesperson

Email: asobel18@gmail.com milkyforstproperties.com

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

NORTH WOODMERE: PRICE REDUCED!!!

Spacious & Bright 4BR Brookfield Split, 3 Full Baths, Eik, Formal DR, Lower Level Den W/Brick Mantle & Fplc, Lg Bedrooms All On One Floor, SD#15…$659K Call Carol Braunstein (516) 295-3000 www.pugatch.com



REAL ESTATE FOR RENT

THE JEWISH HOME

REAL ESTATE FOR SALE

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THE JEWISH HOME

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FEBRUARY 26, 2015

130

TJH Classifieds HELP WANTED

HELP WANTED Email resume: nyteachers@catapultlearning.com Fax# (718) 381-3493

Salon in Cedarhurst is looking For a friendly, experience hair dresser, part time. Please send resume to: saraeidel@aol.com

Mileage ticketing agent.

Do you know how to book mileage airline tickets? Travel agency is seeking dedicated individuals to join our team. Must be familiar with the following terminology - airline codes (ie UA, AA, BA), airport codes (ie yvr, yyz, cdg), airline alliances (ie star, skyteam, oneworld), classes of service ( ie J, F, Y) We’re looking for agents for short and long haul travel to work from our 5 Towns office.

Contact admin@getpeyd.com for more info.

Due to simchos, Torah Academy for Girls, Far Rockaway seeking qualified, experienced elementary & jr high moras.

Fax resume to 718-868-4612 attn: Rabbi Weitman

CATAPULT LEARNING Teachers for Title I in Boro Park and Williamsburg Chassidic boys schools *College/Yeshiva Degree Required *Strong desire to help children learn *Excellent organizational skills *Small group instruction *Competitive salary

Yeshiva in Queens seeks full time secretary.

Immediate opening.

Experience preferred.

Please email resume to ndsudwerts@gmail.com

MISC. YNM/5towns sheital Gemach is in desperate need of wig donations . Anyone who has wigs/ falls they no longer need- There are many women who you can make very happy . Tizku l’mitzvos! Please contact 347-408-8354 for details .

TJH Classifieds

HELP WANTED A wide selection of both the latest and classic novels, Biographies, Short stories, Holocaust, self-help, cookbooks, And more!

OPEN MONDAYS FROM 6:30-7:30 PM AND FRIDAYS FROM 2:00-3:00 PM $25 yearly membership (718) 327-0604

PESACH in the NORTHEAST

Weekly Classified Ads Up to 5 lines and/or 25 words

1 Week......... $20 $10

DJ YOSSY MUSIC and LIGHTING for any event, the crowd will love it.

Djyossy.com 845 774 5949

2 Weeks....... $35 $17.50 4 Weeks....... $60 $30

MISC.

EMAIL ADS TO: classifieds@fivetownsjewishhome.com Include valid credit card info.

Can You Sell?

Looking for donation of car or minivan in good running condition.

Tax exempt receipt available for full market value.

Please call 347-342-8196 BAYSWATER JEWISH LIBRARY IS NOW OPEN

Post your Real Estate, Help Wanted, Services and Misc. Ads here.

Looking to make some extra cash?

On-The-Marc is hiring motivated part time sales people. Six to 8 hours a week with unlimited income potential.

Must have/own car.

For more information Call Marc at 917-612-2300

Deadline: Mondays 5:00pm Publishes on Thursdays

LIVE CONCERTS WITH

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mn

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•• Rabbi Mordechai Ungar shlita

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

DRINK DALTON CANAANRED AND WHITE.



LIVE THE GOOD LIFE.

THE JEWISH HOME

Glass.

FEBRUARY 26, 2015 

THE JEWISH HOME

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CUSTOMER SERVICE

718.431.7900

895 McDonald Avenue

Brooklyn, New York 11218

Between 18th Ave and Ave F | Off 18th Ave station from F train

KNOX STAND

THE JEWISH HOME 

FEBRUARY 26, 2015

Wheels To Lease Guranteed Lowest Pricing!

Any Make Any Model Any Time

* No Hassle Returns * Mileage Forgiveness Program * Damage Forgiveness Program

iPad Giveaway

Join our email list & you will be entered into a raffle for an iPad3

www.wheelstolease.com/joinemaillist Congratulations to our last raffle winner, Jonathan Thurm!

Join our email list and you will be entered into a rae for an iPad 3

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