DECEMBER 2023
ORA TAMIR “My art is my wonderful obsession”
TRAUMA IS REAL Watch for red flags
SWEET CELEBRATIONS Chanukah means donuts
POINT OF VIEW
Arizonans speak out about the war
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4 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
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ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 5
CO N TE N TS 16 Arizona Jewish Life December 2023
22
26
POINT OF VIEW Arizonans speak out about war in Israel
12
COVER STORY Ora Tamir - Israeli surrealist returns to Arizona
16
Donuts - Bringing in the sweetness and light of Chanukah
22
Adele Raemer - October 7th changed my DNA
26
Melanie Rich - Coping with war trauma
32
Kesef for Kids
34
How to grow Zionists
36
Empathy in Action: How to best support Israel Now
38
DECEMBER 2023
ORA TAMIR “My art is my wonderful obsession”
TRAUMA IS REAL Watch for red flags
SWEET CELEBRATIONS Chanukah means donuts
POINT OF VIEW
Arizonans speak out About the war
COVER
Ora Tamir PHOTOGRAPHY COURTESY OF ORA TAMIR
6 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rabbi Bill Berk Tara Dublin Susan Kern Fleischer
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8 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
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PUBLISHER’S MESSAGE
CINDY SALTZMAN Publisher
ONE THING FOR SURE It’s been over two months since October 7, and the shock has not worn off; not for me, not for Jews worldwide, hopefully not for the majority of non-Jews, and certainly not for Israelis. To say that this has been an existential crisis for all of us would be an understatement. I wish I had words of wisdom or comfort, but I don’t. I wish I could wash away the pain and terror, but I can’t. I’m sure like many of you, I could not fathom witnessing a literal “open hunting season” on Jews in the Jewish homeland. Israel, after all, is our safety net against antisemitism, a sturdy ship in the storm, our refuge. And like many, I didn’t want to believe that “antisemitism would become a top international export in the year 2023, a kind of global zeitgeist.” (Mathias Dopfner, Free Press, Dec. 12, 2023). And the hostages...where are they? How did this happen? Many expected a kind of “Raid on Entebbe” scenario response, where our brave and bold IDF soldiers would swoop into Gaza and bring them home quickly and safely. But unfortunately, the world is a different place today. It is a seemingly far darker and more complicated place than anyone can remember post-Holocaust. And now for the children being held as hostages, Anne Frank is no longer a historical figure, but a contemporary. That should sicken any person with an ounce of humanity. But here we are, the lines between friends and foes, good and bad...no make that “evil”, have become blurred. Our equilibrium is off, and we aren’t sure if we are safe anywhere in the world. Our ears ring with the shouts of protestors calling for the death of Jews and the destruction of Israel. The only thing that rings louder is the deafening sounds of silence from humanitarian organizations and social action groups that have lost their voices when it comes to speaking up against the mass atrocities of October 7th, and the rampant antisemitism on our college campuses and in our cities days after. Will we ever feel safe again? I don’t know. But here is what I do know. The Jewish people will not be extinguished, nor hardened to the good in the world. We have survived thousands of years and will continue to do so. We come together to fight a common enemy, not just for the Jewish people, but for all who cherish life over death, humanity over inhumanity, and light over darkness. Am Yisrael Chai.
10 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
Wishing you a Happy Chanukah!
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ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 11
POINT OF VIEW
Speak out loud, even if it’s a whisper! By Debra Rich Gettleman EVERYDAY
Shema: Listen It’s been said that Judaism is a religion of listening. We are asked to believe in a God we cannot see, to hear the cries of the weak and oppressed, to awaken our spirit at the sound of the shofar. As Jews around the globe witness violence, hatred, and antisemitism, we honor the voices of those directly and indirectly impacted by the war in Israel.
12 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
I wear a very tasteful, and very noticeable Jewish star around my neck. It falls just above the necklace that reads my Hebrew name, Devorah. I also wear a blue ribbon when I go out to show my support for Israel and my hope that the hostages will be returned to safety. I’m not screaming or shouting from rooftops. I’m quietly asserting who I am and speaking up about what I believe. While friends of mine are taking down their mizuzot, removing kippot and affirming not to put their hanukiahs in their windows this year, I am asking you to honor your Jewishness by displaying meaningful Jewish symbols in your homes and on your person. It’s not enough to support Israel silently right now. It’s about standing proudly for the Jews and the Jewish state. Because back in 1938,
when the Nazi regime was gaining power, most Jews preferred to tamp down their identities and try to wait out the antisemitism creeping into their lives. In pre-World War II Germany, it was incomprehensible to imagine that Jews, successful members of a cultured society, could ever be targeted in one of the deadliest genocides the world had ever seen. Jews were barred from certain professions. Their businesses were shut down. Jewish children were no longer able to go to school. Jews were defined as biologically inferior through their blood lines. And as all that happened, no one believed that it would lead to the systematic destruction of 6 million Jewish men, women, and children. Look around right now. Jews are being targeted. Jewish businesses are being boycott. Jewish students on campuses all over the world are not safe. And yet, most Jews I know continue to assert that something like the Holocaust could never happen today. We say, “never again” and yet, we are watching history repeat itself. Look at the Cooper Union Jewish students who hid in a library while pro-Palestinian rioters
banged on the glass doors threatening violence. Or the Jewish people in Rashida Tlaib’s 12th district who lost family during the October 7th massacre and have to grapple with the reality that their congresswoman sponsors terrorism and hate. Or, think about Aaron Dahan, Upper East Side owner of Caffe Aronne, whose half a dozen baristas walked off the job due to his support of Israel. This is history repeating itself. And it is up to all of us to say something, do something, stand for something, and not pretend it isn’t happening. Let’s applaud business icons like Bill Ackman and Idan Ofer who spoke out against Ivy league alma maters that support anti-Jewish student groups. Let’s support the 234 Democrat and Republican Representatives who voted to censor Tlaib’s insensitive pro-Hamas rhetoric. Let’s cheer loudly for Pro-Israel community members in New York who showed up to volunteer to work at Café Aronne. Doctors, lawyers, Rabbis, Jews from all walks of life came to help and encourage people to buy gift cards to bolster the business. Customers now line up around the block
to support the store and the business continues to see a significant bump in customers after news of the barista walk-off spread. Elie Wiesel said, “Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.” Speak your truth and speak it now. ♦ Debra Rich Gettleman is the Contributing Editor for Jewish Life Now. She is also a professional actor, producer, playwright, and awardwinning journalist.
I’m taking this personally By Joanne Greene MY
grandparents lived through pogroms – organized massacres where bands of men, seething with hatred of Jews, rode into Jewish villages on horseback, looting, raping, killing, and burning down their homes. I’ve known this the same way I’ve known about the killing fields in Cambodia and the Armenian genociade. Unimaginable evil that happened to someone else, people who didn’t speak my language, who didn’t live like I did, safe and with boundless
opportunity in late 20th and early 21st century America. In Hebrew school they showed us newsreels from the war, the Holocaust, the Shoah. So many names for something that happened far away at another time. I and my friends had nightmares from seeing the grainy, black-and-white images of emaciated naked dead bodies piled high. But that was history, I told myself…like the slaughter by SyrianGreeks, the annihilation decreed by Egyptian Pharoahs. Except that the murder of 6 million Jews had taken place only twenty years earlier. Twenty years, I now know, is an instant. I’ve read countless books, seen innumerable films, been privileged to hear many first-person testimonies, but these atrocities were things that happened to other Jews, at other times, in other places. Until now. “Never again is now.” It’s what we chant at rallies, our minds filled with images of kids who look like our children, brutally murdered at a music festival, parents, and grandparents, just like us, mowed down in their homes. “Bring them home,” we chant of the still missing hostages perhaps held in tunnels
filled with weapons, being used as human shields as Israel fights for its very existence against an enemy that doesn’t protect its people, that is known to use relief money to buy weapons, that teaches its children that judgement day will only come when every Jew is killed. For the first time in my life, I fear for Jewish American college students enduring vicious threats that scare them into remaining inside their dorm rooms, that cause the closure of kosher dining halls because they’re no longer safe. Yes, I’m taking this personally because reason seems absent from much of the discourse. The left with which I’ve marched and identified over so many issues for decades – reproductive rights, women’s rights, LGBTQ rights, human rights – seems not to care about Israeli hostages from more than twentyfive different nations held by a group of people that celebrate the beheadings of Jewish infants. I am sad and confused and feel the need to be counted among those who stand up for Israel’s right to exist. I support the Israel that has continued to try to negotiate a Palestinian state, that, while imperfect, is still
ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 13
POINT OF VIEW
the closest thing to a democracy in the middle east. I take great pride in knowing that hundreds of thousands of Israelis turned out every Saturday after the Sabbath to protest judicial reforms that would have changed the makeup of the Jewish state. I, like so many around the world, yearn for a free and independent place for Palestinians to live peacefully, to cultivate land, to build infrastructure and to educate their children, not just about Jihad but about science and mathematics, art, and economics. This isn’t a fight against the Palestinian people; it’s a fight against the Islamic Resistance movement that is committed to killing Jews until Israel is wiped off the map. Anti-Semitism predates the printing press and, at this point, it may even be inevitable. And perhaps I should have been feeling it’s ugliness more deeply, more personally, all along. Instead, I’ve acted by upholding Jewish values and traditions, learning and teaching about our people’s history and struggles, visiting sites where Judaism thrived and Jews were murdered throughout the world, celebrating our rituals,
telling our jokes, eating our foods. Today’s geopolitical issues in the Middle East are complex and nuanced and the more I read and listen to experts, the more complicated I understand the path to peace to be. What galls me is that most people, with little to no appreciation for history, reduce this and all conflict to good and evil, us and them, the haves and the have nots. In this terrifying, quickly moving scenario in which we find ourselves, the narrative has shifted in mere moments from Israel as victim to Israel as all-powerful master of brutality. I have no answers, only pain punctuated by moments of joy and guilt that, still, even now, I and my immediate family have it so good. ♦ Joanne Greene is a news anchor, host of the podcast “In This Story… with Joanne Greene,” and the author of a new memoir, By Accident: A Memoir of Letting Go. She lives in Marin County with her husband.
14 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
We see it everyday By Piri Lanes THESE ARE
the things to understand about what is happening here in Israel. Unfortunately, this is not something new that Israel is experiencing. We have had atrocities like this happen throughout the years, just not on this scale, so the world didn’t pay attention. Events such as the Fogel family being brutally murdered in their home and the Dee family when the mother and daughter were killed in a car with the father watching in the car behind. What is happening right now is that the world is seeing what we see every day. It’s important to understand that these atrocities are not limited to just Israel or the Jews, these terrorists, their goal is to have their radical version of Islam be the ruling for the whole world. This is no longer just Israel’s war. We’ve seen this when they call for death to America. Right now, Israel is fighting not only for her life, but for the entire western world. What is happening now is a mind-blowing
scenario. We see terrorists being celebrated around the world. The photos from these Pro Palestinian protests are praising the slaughter of babies, families, the raping of women, the burning of bodies, and people are proud of this. While here in Israel we run to bomb shelters on a daily basis because Hamas is indiscriminately launching rockets to kill as many people as they can. A hospital in the southern city of Ashkelon was hit and the media outlets haven’t spoken about it. They’ve shown that they don’t care when Israelis are being terrorized. The hypocrisy is unbelievable. You see masses of people flooding the streets in Europe, Australia and the United States, chanting to gas the Jews and annihilate the Jewish State while security stands by and does nothing. Yet peaceful Pro-Israel rallies are being shut down and people are escorted away, ostensibly for security reasons. In Israel we have a saying, tell me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are. When you see the countries that support Hamas what does it tell you? When you see terrorist countries like Iran, Russia, China, and North
Korea supporting Hamas it makes it obvious who is on the side of good. Hamas and their allies celebrate death while we celebrate life. Good will always beat evil. For our friends in Arizona, we want to thank them for their ongoing support, there are many places like Magen David Adom and the IDF that people can donate to. There are organizations that are also helping people that have been displaced. ♦ From Piri Lanes, formerly of Scottsdale, AZ. She made Aliyah 5 years ago. And despite the current darkness, Piri was recently married and continues to bring joy and light into the world.
The Simchat Torah Massacre By Rabbi Bill Berk
Rabbi Emeritus Temple Chai
IN
September 2005 Israel pulled out of Gaza with the hope that the Palestinians there would build a healthy prosperous country. Two years later Hamas took over Gaza and began focusing not on building a good country
but on destroying Israel. We found out, to our shock and horror, that Hamas had zero interest in peace and was viciously opposed to pluralism. Since then Hamas has made it clear that Israel will never be welcomed in the MIddle East. They believe in creating an Islamic Empire–no Jews and no Israel. Most of the modern world is making peace with the idea of pluralism–but not Hamas. Now it is one thing to be opposed to pluralism. It is quite another thing to commit the atrocities they have unleashed with this war which began on October 7th. These atrocities have crossed a red line that changes how we look at our situation. We now look at it like this–we have no choice. If we don’t stop Hamas they will kill us. Many others around the world, including many in the U.S., look at the situation differently and either equate the two sides or simply support Hamas. Part of our enormous stress right now is exactly this issue– especially the way the world got tired of Israel’s suffering after two days of empathy. For us a line has been crossed. The joyous laughter of Hamas fighters as they murdered parents in
front of their children and children in front of their parents–crossed a line. The kidnapping of little children and babies and elders–crossed a line. Raping teenage girls before killing them– crossed a line. Chopping babies heads off and burning babies alive–it is too much, it crossed a line. Shooting rockets at us–12 shot at us in the last few minutes (October 31)–crosses a line. So the IDF (Israel Defense Forces) is going to do what it needs to do whether students at Harvard like it or not. Jewish suffering is no longer making headlines. Here’s a secret about Israeli society. If there had been ten people murdered and four people kidnapped we would be as horrified and stressed out as we are with 1400 murdered and 245 kidnapped. Why? Two reasons: 1) We take seriously that every human is created b’tzelem, in God’s image, which to us means that every single person has infinite worth. 2) Israel is one big family. We are a gregarious group of people who love life. We feel connected to each other. So the numbers don’t matter–each and every person is a world, precious beyond words. Speaking of numbers– if we took what is
happening here in Israel and Gaza and on a per capita basis extrapolate what the numbers would be in the U.S.—it would look like this: on one day (9/11) 90,000 people murdered and 7,000 kidnapped–you get an idea of the extent of the tragedy on October 7, 2023. We feel terrible for the people trapped in Gaza, held captive by Hamas. We pray for their liberation from Hamas. For those whose sympathies lie more in the direction of Hamas please keep in mind that sometimes in order to stop evil from spreading it is necessary to hurt innocent civilians. In Germany five million civilians were killed by the Allies desperate to stop Hitler. They didn’t want to hurt these people–but that is war. One last word–in the Bible the word hamas means wild, destructive, violent behavior. ♦ Rabbi Berk currently lives in Jerusalem. He served for 23 years as the senior Rabbi at Temple Chai in Phoenix, Arizona.
ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 15
I
n many ways, acclaimed artist Ora Tamir is a storyteller. Though there are no spoken or written words, her surrealistic paintings capture the fantastical, adventurous, evocative, and sometimes serious stories and images that exist in her mind’s eye as she begins to paint. Ora was born on a kibbutz: a settlement surrounded by the stark beauty of the Israeli desert. When she was young, she would spend hours gazing at masterpieces in Tel Aviv’s Museum of Art. “It became my art class – my favorite playground. I admired art masters such as Leonardo da Vinci, Michelangelo, and Vincent van Gogh. I studied their work. They were my teachers. On my bat mitzvah, I received a beautiful leather box, an oil paint set. It was a treasure for me, and I just stared at it in wonder,” she says. Years later, after completing a two-year service in the Israel Defense Forces, she traveled to New York. It was there that she discovered the work of Salvador Dali for the first time at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. “I was awestruck. That night I had a vivid dream – in it, a child was tied to a balloon, grasping her parents’ hands. I immediately sketched it and knew I had crossed into the world of Surrealism for good,” she says.
SURREALIST ISRAELI ARTIST ORA TAMIR RETURNS TO ARIZONA FINE ART EXPO
COVER STORY
By Susan Kern-Fleischer
Opposite page: FLAMES II 16 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 17
“I don’t know when my soul will be able to put what I feel on canvas. I am not an angry person. I hate violence. We, the people in Israel, will fight to get our hostages back and bring an end to the forces of evil named Hamas. We, the people of Israel, Jews, Christians, and Arabs, seek peace.” ~Ora Tamir
18 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
ORA TAMIR
FINDING PEACE IN PAINTING Ora considers herself blessed to have found her life’s passion in painting. She prefers to paint in solitude, with no sounds or distractions. “I get into a meditative state the moment I hold a pencil or a brush. Nothing exists except me and the painting. I don’t feel time passing…it is a gift I was born with,” she says. “My art is my wonderful obsession; I get lost in it. So do the people who tell me that my art brings them to a good place.” She relies on her intuition to guide her, and she cherishes the ability to be spontaneous. “I start a painting without knowing where it is taking me. It evolves layer by layer. Sometimes a drawing that scribbled absentmindedly calls me to develop it into a painting. Again...It evolves,” she says. “I enjoy watching people as they look at my paintings. As they connect with them, they ask, “What does it mean?” and I respond, “What does it mean to you?”. They find their personal stories in my art. It speaks to them. I have learned to listen, and it is rewarding.” Ora and her late husband, Eli Tamir, immigrated to California in 1980, where they raised three teenagers. As her business manager, Eli helped her tremendously with many aspects of her career. Eli’s passing in December 2016 was such a devastating loss to her, she had trouble painting and sunk into a depression. Picking up the paintbrush got her out of a black hole, and she healed. Ora’s life was once again turned upside down on the morning of October 7, 2023. Alarms on her phone app alerted her to seek shelter in her safe room when the terrorist group Hamas launched its barbaric attacks against Israel. “My mother was a Holocaust survivor, and I was brought up listening to Holocaust stories. My generation is the “Never again” generation. The brutal attack by Hamas brought it all back,” Ora says. “It is gut wrenching. We in Israel are like one big, united family. The horrific monstrosity, the brutality affects each one of us.” For the first week, she stayed glued to the television. She finally forced herself to get back into the studio. Several months after the September 11, 2001, terrorist attacks on the United States, Ora painted her interpretation of the World Trade Center towers on that historic day. Her painting, “Rage,” remains in her private library. She shared that she is still digesting the monstrosities that have transpired since October 7 and it may take time before she UNTAMED II ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 19
ORA TAMIR
translates her emotions to a canvas. “I don’t know when my soul will be able to put what I feel on canvas. I am not an angry person. I hate violence. We, the people in Israel, will fight to get our hostages back and bring an end to the forces of evil named Hamas. We, the people of Israel, Jews, Christians, and Arabs, seek peace.” FULL OF GRATITUDE In troubled times like this, Ora is grateful for her faith and loving family and friends. “I cherish my Jewish heritage, our history and who we are as a people. I am proud to be Jewish,” she says. “I always say my morning prayers when I wake up, thanking G-d for putting my soul back in my body. I thank G-d for the gifts that were bestowed on me. I pray when I go to sleep and add some words that are not written in the prayer book. My mother taught me all these things as a little girl. I am so grateful for my health, for the life that I have and for living in Israel, the land that I love.” During Arizona Fine Art EXPO, Ora will exhibit a new collection of original surreal oil paintings and limited editions of hand embellished giclee prints as well as a collection of Chromaluxe prints on metal. To learn more, visit www. arizonafineartexpo.com. ▲ HAPPY HOUR 20 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
Arizona Fine Art EXPO An Israeli resident who resides near Tel Aviv, Ora will make north Scottsdale home for 10 weeks as she paints from her art studio at the Arizona Fine Art EXPO. The popular event begins Friday, January 12 and runs through Sunday, March 24 from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. daily under the “festive white tents” at 26540 N. Scottsdale Rd., on the southwest corner of Scottsdale and Jomax Roads, next to MacDonald’s Ranch. Celebrating its 20th season, the fine art show features 75 diverse artists in 124 patron-friendly working studios within a 44,000 squarefoot space. Artists work in their studios daily, and guests have a chance to see them in action and learn about their inspiration and techniques.
BETH BENOWICH
TERRY ALEXANDER
SCOTT SHANGRAW
SUSAN Q. BYRD
MARTIN BOURBEAU
ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 21
22 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
SUFGANIYOT TO SWEETEN THE TIMES By Debra Rich Gettleman
C
hanukah means donuts, at least in Israel. That’s right, over 80% of Israelis eat at least one sufganiya (donut) over the Chanukah holiday. In fact, devouring donuts might actually be the most observed religious ritual in Israeli life. And guess who consumes the most of these delectible dunkers? The top donut buyer is actually the Israeli Army. Nearly half a million donuts are delivered via trucks and shared with soldiers all across the country each year. In case you don’t remember, the custom of eating fried foods during Chanukah dates to back to the time of the Maccabees. Here’s the Spark Notes version: This evil Hellenistic king, Antiochus IV, wanted to get rid of the Jews and their religion. Hmmm…sound familiar? But a guy named Judah Maccabee and his brothers fought Antiochus to keep their religion and reclaim the Jewish temple in Jerusalem. When the victorious Maccabees returned from battle, they found only enough oil to light the temple’s eternal
FOOD
Naaman Donuts Hanukkah Collection 2023 with a blue-white sign. PHOTOGRAPHY COURTESY OF NAAMAN BAKERY
ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 23
SUFGANIYAH
flame for one night. Well, since it was supposed to be “eternal,” this was a bit of an issue. But that tiny amount of oil miraculously lasted for 8 days and nights. Thus, we have the miracle of Chanukah. The “Faithful Bakery” (Mafa Naaman) chain in Israel has been creating fabulous pastries, desserts, and donuts for decades. This year, they are launching their most artistic, innovative, and patriotic donuts of all time, as a statement of Israeli pride. Classic culinary combos like Donut Rocha, which includes white fondant, milk jam, Belgian white/brown chocolate and caramel ganache showcase some of the highest quality raw materials from the patisserie world. While one goal of Mafa Naaman is to sweeten the current war-ridden times, the patriotic “Israela” donut is at the top of this year’s collection as a testament to Zionism. Feauturing a delicious donut filled with pastry cream, coated with white chocolate, decorated with Israeli flag-colored candies and boasting an Israeli flag, this delectable will fill both your heart and belly with sweetness. ▲
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Here’s a preview of Maffa Naaman's exciting donut menu for 2023: 1. Dolce Caramel – donut filled with caramelized white chocolate, coated with blondie chocolate cream, decorated with caramel toffee candies, coarse salt and salty pretzel pieces. 2. Pistachina – a donut filled with pistachio cream, topped with pistachio cream, decorated with a white chocolate cream rosette and pistachio chocolate curls. 3. Raspberry Rose – a donut filled with raspberry cream, coated with white chocolate, decorated with a rosette of raspberry cream, raspberry pie and a milk chocolate cigar. 4. Millefeuille – a donut filled with pastry cream, coated with vanilla pastry cream, decorated with vanilla pâté and powdered sugar. 5. Funchiki – a fried donut filled with pastry cream, coated with coarse sugar and a pastry cream rosette.
Mimi Neeman delivers to her best customers, the Israeli army. 24 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
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T KIBBUTZ NIRIM SURVIVOR
ADELE RAEMER:
My DNA changed on th October 7 By Cindy Saltzman PERSON TO PERSON
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he first time I met Adele Raemer was on a zoom interview. She wore a T-shirt with Hebrew letters on it that I couldn’t quite make out. When asked what it said, she replied, “Oh, I had the other one on before. I’m bilingual.” She pulled up a matching t-shirt with English letters that read, “Bring them home now.” Between zoom interviews, vigils, and live talks, Adele Raemer is so busy speaking out about her experience at kibbutz Nirim on October 7th, that she can’t always keep track of which language t-shirt to wear for which audience. She also dons a new piece of jewelry which is actually a dog tag. “It says in Hebrew to bring them home now,” she explains. “And on the bottom, it says, ‘My heart is being held hostage in Gaza, 7/10/23.’ She has her close friend’s name from the neighboring kibbutz Kfar Aza next door engraved on the bottom. Her friend, out on a regular sunrise walk in the field with her husband, called the kibbutz nurse at 7:04am on October 7th reporting that both she and her husband had been shot. Unfortunately, by that time the kibbutz ambulance had already been blown up. That was the last they heard of the couple. We spoke with Adele Raemer in her temporary housing in a hotel in Eilat. (Comments are edited for brevity.) JEWISH LIFE NOW: Is it difficult to always go back and describe the horrors of that day? ADELE RAEMER: I survived and I see it as a responsibility as a survivor to talk about it because the world needs to know and understand what actually went on that day. Because I’m watching the news and seeing all these different
“A switch in my DNA tells me that before we can get to the diplomacy, before we can make peace, we have to make war.” ~Adele Raemer
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ADELE RAEMER
groups saying that there’s an expiration date on this and that Israel is not going to be able to continue the fight much longer. That just infuriates me. I don’t think anybody put a timestamp on the Americans when they went into Germany to win, to be victorious over the Nazis. They did what they did for as long as it took. JLN: Tell us about kibbutz Nirim. AR: Well, October 6th was our Kibbutz’s anniversary. We’re 77 years old. We are one of the 11 communities that were sent out into the Negev Desert in 1946. Before I went to bed on October 6th, I told my son, who was visiting that if he doesn’t see me in the morning, it’s because I am going to get up early to take pictures of a field of wildflowers that are in bloom. I wanted to catch it at sunrise. Thank G-d I was too lazy to get up at six the next morning because at 7:30 we started getting incoming rocket warnings…a massive barrage which was really very unusual. In retrospect, we learned that this heavy barrage was sort of camouflaging, taking the attention, the army’s attention, everybody’s attention, away from what was the main event. Which was what was going on along the border in at least 40 spots where Hamas, who had been planning this for a year or more, broke through the border, this supposedly impenetrable border with an underground barrier and an overground electronic fence with the highest technology. About 20 minutes later, we got notification that there were terrorists infiltrating Israel. We were told to go out of our safe rooms, to close the doors and the windows, and to lock ourselves back in the safe room. JLN: To go out of the safe room? AR: Yes. So, I ran to the safe room where my son was sleeping. And it’s a “safe” room because it’s built to protect us from rockets. It has reinforced walls and ceiling. It has a very heavy iron sleeve over the window which you close and click down to lock. And it has a door, an iron door, which you close, and you click the handle down, and when you click the handle down, metal prongs stick into the ceiling and the floor, which prevents, if a rocket impacts 28 DECEMBER 2023 | ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE
your house anyplace else, it prevents an implosion from blowing the door open. The problem with the safe room is that it wasn’t built for infiltration and you cannot lock yourself in. In fact, it’s illegal to lock yourself in because if you have a medical emergency and you’re inside there, the first responders won’t be able to come and rescue you. We often hear rocket explosions. But we’ve never heard gunfire, automatic machine gun fire inside the kibbutz. Grenades and RPGs and things were exploding all around and people were saying that they could hear people shouting in Arabic. Then all of a sudden, we started getting messages calling for help, that terrorists were at their doors. They were in their houses, and they were trying to open up the safe room doors. So, if you’re strong enough you
Happier times as Adele poses in her kitchen at Kibbutz Nirim. The destruction in Kibbutz Nirim. Adele en route to look at safe temporary housing
can keep that closed, but if they’re stronger, then somebody from the outside can open it. We also started hearing messages about houses being set on fire. So we’re sort of following the progression of this nightmare as it was going on and wondering, “When are we going to be next?” JLN: So, you were just waiting for the IDF to arrive? AR: We have a team of first responders who are trained and armed. My son-in-law is one of them. They’re trained for all sorts of scenarios. But they’re trained for infiltration by one terrorist, five terrorists, not the quantity that we got. We got 50 to 60 terrorists flooding into our community. Adele tells us about a young couple and their eight-day-old baby who were being suffocated by
“I saw over 3000 terrorists and just regular Gazans flooding through our borders, wreaking havoc in our communities, murdering in the most barbaric ways. I’m thinking, where were the good Gazans?” ~Adele Raemer
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The kibbutz Nirim before the destruction.
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ADELE RAEMER
smoke before first responders could reach them. She describes the terrorists as more than Hamas militants. There were terrorists and everyday people. AR: They were just your average everyday Joes, everyday Mohammed in Gaza. Apparently, they sent out a message saying, “Come on, guys, we’re going to conquer the Jews. Come in and help us and have fun and, you know, do what you can to get your frustrations out, whatever.
There were so many regular people, just people; unarmed people and you see internal TV showing them coming through the gate. Like there was an old man with a stick and young teenagers just coming in. They set cars afire and slashed windows and broke windows and went into houses and started taking stuff out of the refrigerators and sitting down and eating. I did not think I was going to see another sunrise. I was sure this was the end. Adele remembers hearing Arabic voices right outside her home. Then she heard someone calling them away. Once she was able to leave her house, she found broken slats on her window and realized they were on the verge of breaking into her home when other terrorists called them away. Once the IDF f inally reached the kibbutz about 7 hours later, they systematically went from house to house to make sure there were no more terrorists. When she and a group of survivors were f inally walked back to the community center, where they could be protected, she wondered why the soldiers had taken such a long route around the outskirts of the kibbutz. She later learned that they were trying to spare the group even more trauma from viewing all the exposed bodies strewn across the road on the short way around. AR: I was finally liberated at 5:15pm. From 6:30am, that’s almost 11 hours. My son-in-law and granddaughters had to be evacuated through their window because a terrorist body was right in front of the door. And as they were evacuating them, there was terrorist fire and they had to duck into a shelter nearby. JLN: How are your granddaughters doing? AR: They’re very traumatized and it’s very difficult for them now even to be in the hotel. So, we were evacuated under fire through an active war zone. We passed smoking vehicles on the side of the road, vehicles that were still burning, charred bodies on the side of the road. It was an active war zone. JLN: How has this changed you? You said earlier that your DNA was changed. Can you explain that a little? AR: You know, I’ve been giving people tours through my kibbutz for years and telling our story to people that come to Nirim. I’ve always said, “I’m in
touch with people in Gaza and the people that I’m in touch with believe in different things. They believe that we can live as good neighbors and we should live as good neighbors, and they believe that children should not be educated to hate. I’ve always said that I truly believe that most Gazans are like that, that most Gazans just want the same thing that I do, to put food on their table and to have safety for their children. But after I saw Over 3000 terrorists and just regular Gazans flooding through our borders, wreaking havoc in our communities, murdering in the most barbaric ways. I’m thinking, where were the good Gazans? Where were they? They cut babies out of their mother’s womb. They chopped children’s fingers off. They dismembered people while they were alive and they were so proud of it that they took video footage of it, which I have not seen and I will not see, but it is out there and people need to see it, to understand what it is that we’re up against. These are monsters. Adele sadly discusses how Gazan children are educated to hate Jews. AR: Gazan children have an end of the year play and they dress up as Gazan fighters and IDF fighters and the Gazans kill the IDF soldiers and take them hostage. These are the kids that grew up to be the monsters that came into our community on October 7th. They’ve been trained for this. They have textbooks in Gaza that teach you math. Saying if you had 10 Jews and you kill seven, how many are left? And it’s been going on for decades. Adele describes herself as a pacif ist who has always advocated for a non-violent solution to the region’s conflict. But now, there’s been a shift. AR: A switch in my DNA tells me that before we can get to the diplomacy, before we can make peace, we have to make war. it’s not going to be pretty and it’s not going to be short. It’s not going to be easy. And we can’t have a timeline imposed. We can’t have a time limit on this. The IDF has to be allowed to do what they know how to do best. ▲ ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 31
TRAUMA IS REAL: Pay attention to the signs By Debra Rich Gettleman
DR. MELANIE RICH
WARNINGS TO WATCH FOR
While the signs of trauma vary by individual, here are some red flags to watch for: Irritability Anger Depression Tearfulness Overwhelm Nightmares Sleep disturbances eing unusually quiet, B withdrawn, or distant
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D
r. Melanie Rich, (no relation), doesn’t necessarily look like a first responder as she sits in her tastefully appointed Scottsdale, AZ office. But she’s been on the ground helping victims cope with trauma for decades. At Ben Taub hospital in Houston in 1975, she was part of the team that developed the first rape kit. She was one of several therapists on-call to help victims deal with the trauma of rape. From evidence collection to physical wound triage to the emotional overwhelm that affects victims of rape, Dr. Rich was there to help heal. In 1995, while living in Oklahoma, she was at the Federal building after the bombing to walk injured victims and family members of those killed in the blast, through the desecrated remains prior to it being imploded. Then came 911 and she was a regular on morning television news programs trying to help people deal with the grief, rage, and loss we experienced at the hands of brutal ISIS terrorists. She tried to get to Israel to provide trauma counseling shortly after the October 7th Hamas massacre. But in the midst of the chaos and turmoil, only military personnel were allowed to fly into the country. We sat down to talk about the direct and indirect trauma that Jews in America and all across the globe are experiencing. “People respond to trauma very differently,” she tells me, “More sensitive ‘feelers’ take things really hard. Whether they know someone who was personally involved or not doesn’t matter. They are highly empathic people who have an immediate response and a hard time coming out of it. Other people might take longer to process the stress and trauma. It may look different. But they are still empathic.” I confess to being an empath and ask what we are supposed to do to protect our psyches as we witness this kind of brutality. Dr. Rich recommends unplugging. She jokes about the sidelong glances she used to get from the program director at the news station where she appeared post 911.
She told viewers, “Folks, turn off your televisions. You can only watch those horrific images so many times before it starts to make your soul sick.” While that might have been the end of Rich’s tv news career, she still adheres to that same principal and tells me, “It’s about balance. You can be informed without watching hours of traumatizing footage.” “I feel guilty turning it off,” I say. “What gives me the right to walk away and go to the gym or have my hair done? People in Israel, can’t just ‘turn it off.’” “Survivor guilt is real,” she responds. “But your self-care might enable you to better reach out and help where you are able. Taking care of your own psyche prevents you from being incapacitated with sadness and depression.” Dr. Rich recommends engaging in stress management techniques like exercise and spending time with people to lift yourself up. Attending community gatherings that encourage unity is also a great way to destress. I ask about how to help young kids and teens cope with all the negative energy and dissent. While she admits she’s not a social media expert, Dr. Rich recognizes, “Social media is really angry and confrontational right now, and not very empathic. The rhetoric is so angry and accusing. Young adults are getting the brunt of it. It’s painful trying to figure out who’s with you and who’s against you.” “Listen to your kids,” Dr. Rich advises. “Ask them what questions they have and reassure them that they are safe and will continue to be safe. That is the primary job for adults in their lives. Listen more than talk. Ask questions and really listen to what kids are saying.” She also encourages anyone who is struggling to unplug and reach out to clergy, temple personnel, and counseling organizations for referrals to mental health practitioners. Overall, Dr. Rich suggests, “Go to rallies or smaller town halls. Put yourself in a room with people who share your feelings and emotions. And most importantly, talk to people. Let them share in whatever you’re thinking and feeling.” She acknowledges that many people feel they should suffer in silence, hide their emotions, and not make waves. She disagrees profoundly with that. “Now is the time to make waves, big waves,” she adds, “In peaceful, thoughtful, and ethical ways.”▲
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A More Kesef for Kiddos DONATE
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t a recent board meeting The Jewish Tuition Organization ( JTO) Board voted to expand their scholarship reach to more students attending a qualified Jewish day school. Until this recent vote, the JTO was limited to six Phoenix area Jewish day schools. JTO Executive Director Janet Silva, who started her position on August 1, advocated for the change. “As a certified school tuition organization (STO), our role is to support students to receive a Jewish education regardless of their financial situation and this change allows the JTO to help more students,” explains Silva. “Scholarship funds are attached to the student, not to the school, so if a student changes the Jewish day school he or she attends, the scholarship follows the student.” Tamim Academy, located in Chandler, is the first new school to join JTO’s current six partner schools. “We are looking forward to our families working with the JTO to help fund their children’s Jewish education, and we are excited to support the JTO in their efforts, said Tamim Academy Director Rabbi Tzemach Gelman. The JTO’s other partner schools include Desert Jewish Academy in Chandler, Pardes Jewish Day School in Scottsdale and Phoenix Hebrew Academy, Shearim Torah High School for Girls, Torah Day School of Phoenix and Yeshiva High School of Arizona all located in Phoenix. Any Jewish day schools not currently affiliated with the JTO will have a simple application process that confirms they are a qualified school. All interested Jewish day schools should contact the JTO or visit JTOphoenix.org. In addition to broadening the reach of students who have access to scholarships, the application process for the families has been streamlined and more tools are now available through JTO’s customer relationship management system (CRM). “Our goal is to help our families and provide as much assistance as we can and we feel these new procedures and tools will do just that,” states Silva. The JTO will communicate the new process to families in the coming weeks and hold meetings for families that have questions or need personal assistance with the new application process or using the CRM tools. The JTO is a certified STO and a 501(c)(3) that raises funds from individuals and corporations through Arizona’s dollarfor-dollar private school tax credit to provide Jewish day school scholarships. Currently more than 650 students receive JTO scholarships. As a 501(c)(3), the JTO can also accept non-credit donations and all support is appreciated. For more information or to support the JTO visit jtophoenix.org or call 480-634-4926. Deadlines for giving vary. Individual donations can be made up to April 15th, 2024. Corporate giving deadlines end December 31st, 2024, or by end of fiscal year. Consult your tax advisor for specific tax advice.▲
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I
n a climate rife with antisemitism and pro Hamas campus rallies, StandWithUs is leading the way by building a growing network of Zionist students who can educate their peers and stand firmly against antisemitism. Through its StandWithUs High School Kenneth Leventhal Intern program and StandWithUs Emerson Fellowship, students learn how to navigate antisemitic activity and how to mobilize others to confront these issues strategically and effectively. These leaders, together with the many alumni of both programs, share ideas and best practices, support each other, and work together to make their schools and universities a better, safer, and more accepting place for Jewish and other proIsrael students.
HOW TO GROW ZIONISTS StandWithUs Selects Area 2023-24 for its Campus and High School Programs
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Arizona local Kenneth Leventhal Interns and Emerson Fellow StandWithUs High School Kenneth Leventhal Interns: Dana Ozer, and Noa Ozer at Chapparel High School Aviv Melman, Basha High School Zoe Miller, Saguaro High School StandWithUs Emerson Fellow: Omer Dai, Arizona State University StandWithUs has campus and high school regional managers throughout the U.S., Canada, in Israel, the UK, Brazil, South Africa and the Netherlands. Many are alumni of the Internship and/or Fellowship. They provide guidance and support to any student who requests assistance and help them gain confidence as they meet challenges head-on.
REGIONAL MANAGERS Students in both programs
CHLOE LEVIAN Campus Regional Manager, Southwest Region: Southern California, Arizona, New Mexico, Colorado, Utah
GABRIEL IVKER continues as the High School Regional Manager, Southwest
history of Israel and reviewed
attended their week-long
the complexities of the Israeli-
respective conferences in August,
Palestinian conflict while learning
preparing them for the school
how to have rich conversations
year. They learned how to
about Israel and how to better use
identify and combat anti-Israel
social media platforms. Students
campaigns including utilizing
sharpened their leadership skills
the StandWithUs Saidoff Legal
and met as local regions to
Department and Center for
develop their own goals for the
Combating Antisemitism. They
year. They left excited and felt
learned how to bring Holocaust
better prepared, with many new
programming to their schools
ideas for programming.
through the newly created SWU
Emerson Fellows and Leventhal
Holocaust Education Center.
Interns will also participate in a
One critical session explored
second StandWithUs conference,
Zionism and identity. Students
“Israel in Focus,” February
learned about the importance
29-March 3, 2024, where they
of getting their schools/
will meet other SWU students
communities to adopt the
and leaders from around the
widely accepted International
world. Held in Los Angeles, the
Holocaust Remembrance Alliance
conference is open to both student
(IHRA) Working Definition of
leaders and community members
Antisemitism. They were taught
and offers a variety of tracks for
about the tactics anti-Israel groups
participants to have their own
utilize and how to respond to lies
unique, customized experience.
and misinformation promoted
There are breakout sessions, and
about Israel.
everyone joins the plenaries to
Students explored the
hear from renowned experts.
Oz Laniado, Joins StandWithUs as the Southwest Executive which encompasses Arizona. Oz held positions on the Board of Directors of a NASDAQ company and served as the San Diego regional director for the Israeli American Council (IAC) and the Friends of Israel Defense Forces (FIDF). ARIZONA JEWISH LIFE | DECEMBER 2023 37
Empathy in Action: How to best support Israel now As Israel and America stand strong against Hamas, Hezbollah, and anyone who supports the massacre of innocent civilians, the desire to help is palpable. But how do you know where and how to give? How do you determine a charity is credible and f iscally responsible? How can you be sure that the money you donate is getting to those in danger and most in need? Jewish Life Now has done some research and through a careful analysis of philanthropic, economic, and human service non-prof it organizations and charitable organizations, we have put together a list of some of the most reputable and effective charities. In addition to the short list below, your Jewish Federations, Combined Jewish Philanthropies and Jewish Community Foundations are equipped to help as well. (As always, please do your own research):
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AMERICAN FRIENDS OF MAGEN DAVID ADOM https://afmda.org Help is desperately needed to put more ambulances on the road and to replenish supplies for EMTs and paramedics and for MDA’s blood services division. AMERICAN FRIENDS OF MEIR PANIM https://meirpanim.org/ Food insecurity in Israel https://donate.meirpanim.org/nachal-oz/ Adopt the families of Nachal Oz AMERICAN FRIENDS OF NATAL afnatal.org NATAL - the Israel Trauma and Resiliency Center is an apolitical non-profit organization which provides a unique, multidisciplinary model of psychological support to victims of trauma due to terror and war, regardless of religion or political affiliation. CITRUS & SALT COOKING/ CITIZEN’S KITCHEN www.citrusandsaltcooking.com https://www.gofundme.com/f/citizens-kitchen Tel Aviv cooking studio turned meal operation for soldiers and families in Isarel. DOGS ARE US ISRAEL www.Dogsrus.co.il A dog rescue for the last 7 years, the need to rescue and house dogs since October 7 has increased substantially due to the chaos that ensued including displaced families, deaths and fear. FRIENDS OF THE ISRAEL DEFENSE FORCES https://www.f idf.org A non-political, non-military organization that provides for wellbeing of the soldiers of
the Israel Defense Forces (IDF), veterans and family members. JEWISH NATIONAL FUND (JNF) Jnf.org They work to ensure a strong, secure, and prosperous future for the land and people of Israel from planting trees, building houses and parks, source water solutions, buy fire trucks, and improve the lives of people with special needs and run volunteer programs in Israel. To volunteer on farms across Israel - register to their mission: https://bit.ly/3ucxy5D ONE ISRAEL FUND https://oneisraelfund.org Primarily focused on enabling Jewish life to flourish in all areas of our Biblical Heartland, as well as other areas throughout Israel. SOLDIERS SAVE LIVES www.soldierssavelives.org A grass roots organization that saw the need on October 8 and jumped into action.They send equipment to the IDF via their US- toIsrael supply chain. IN MEMORY OF DAVID NEWMAN. UNITED HATZALAH https://israelrescue.org/ The largest community-based volunteer emergency medical services (EMS) organization that provides the fastest response to medical emergencies across Israel free of charge. You can donate for emergency equipment as well. VOLUNTEERS FOR ISRAEL https://vf i-usa.org/ Opportunities for civilians to volunteer on IDF bases
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