JEWISH INTEREST
July/August 2022
Federation Star
19
What kind of Jew am I? Kreiss’s Kvetching Korner By Joel Kreiss
B
ecause of the pandemic, I have or Lundys seafood in Sheepshead Bay. become involved in three Torah Neither of these places had the “O-U” study groups in three separate designation. Based on this fact, and the cities. It has been a wonderful experiaforementioned, we were seven different ence, interacting with Jews from different kinds of Jews, each with their own conbackgrounds and experiences, discussing cept of kosher. My family was four and my similar and conflicting views on a word aunt had a daughter, so they were three. or passage. And then there was a friend whose All these Jews with all disparate backfamily was so frum that they not only grounds made me wonder, what kind of had the shabbat gentile who turned on Jew am I? the lights, but on Friday, before ShabI got in touch with just how many bat, also tore and folded the day’s supply interpretations there are of “being Jewish.” of toilet paper lest they had to possibly For instance, the Moment magazine I’ve commit a violation of ripping or working subscribed to for eons has a column called or whatever on the sabbath. “Ask the Rabbis.” A question is posed, So, who is right and who is not? and rabbis of the various movements give My answer is all are right and, yet, answers based upon their understanding it just seems to this writer that we Jews of Judaism. When I first started reading inflict some kind of intimidation on Moment, there were four or each other. There appears five listings. The latest edito be a process of judging, tion has 10 listings! And, of not that you are Jewish, but course, not every member how Jewish. fully agrees with the other. Is there some magic numThere is an old joke — ber one has to achieve to be how many shuls do you need Jewish or at least be considfor two Jews? The answer is ered a “good Jew?” Is pride of three! Each one the other one’s Judaism and good deeds wouldn’t go to and the third sufficient to erase the “sin” of they both can agree upon. eating traif? Are four kitchens Based on that, I figure there with their attending impleJoel Kreiss are about 15 million Jewish ments the only way to keep movements, each one just slightly differkosher, or is keeping kosher a requisite ent from the other and all correct — and for being Jewish? oh, one huge one for all to attend, called I recently visited the Weitzman outside under the stars! National Museum of American Jewish An example from my own life is the History in Philadelphia, and I highly tradition of keeping kosher. My mother recommend this beautifully presented kept kosher and so did her sister. I called history of our arrival to this “Promised my mother’s kosher, “farkockter” kosher. Land.” A statement caught my eye that I We had kosher meat and didn’t mix think encapsulates my feeble attempt to milchik (milchedikg) with flayshig (flayexpress my thoughts. It is basically that shedig). Our small glass plates and small we Jews all worship, recognize or accept utensils were for the milk meal, and the the concept of the one God, or none, larger porcelain plates and large utensils and have embarked on our own journey were for meat. As an aside, there is a small, towards fulfilling that goal. obscure passage in the Jerusalem Talmud, What a mitzvah it would be if all of written in some foreign manner that us could use our energy in helping others only my mother understood, stating that reach their particular goal. bacon can be considered kosher if cooked And yet, that is not what makes a Jew. on a fire at least four feet below ground. For me, the essence is captured in the We just happened to have an old stove writings of two prophets, Amos 5:21-24 in the basement that fit that description. and Micah 6:6-8, with Micah writing the My mother’s sister, my Aunt Gert, who most beautiful passage of all. Study with lived around the corner, also kept kosher. others, freely exchange the thoughts these She was so kosher that she had two soaps, passages evoke, find your favorite and two towels, a dish rack in the sink to keep “teach them diligently to your children, the milchig dishes from touching the and talk of them when you sit in your surface where the flayshig dishes touched, house, when you walk by the way, when or vice versa. She and her husband, my you lie down and when you rise up…” Uncle Barney, would never eat in our Joel Kreiss is a retired dentist from New home because it was not kosher enough! Jersey, who moved to Venice, Florida in In Brooklyn, where I grew up, Sunday Nov. 1997. He always loved to write but was usually the “eating-out-day” and two in retirement discovered poetry and, just of our favorite places to go with Aunt recently, painting. “We are more than what Gert and Uncle Barney was Joy Fong, we once were, and in retirement we have a the Chinese joint around the corner, chance to find out what…”
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