12 | The Jewish Press | November 26, 2021
Voices The Jewish Press (Founded in 1920) Margie Gutnik President Annette van de Kamp-Wright Editor Richard Busse Creative Director Susan Bernard Advertising Executive Lori Kooper-Schwarz Assistant Editor Gabby Blair Staff Writer Mary Bachteler Accounting Jewish Press Board Margie Gutnik, President; Abigail Kutler, Ex-Officio; Danni Christensen; David Finkelstein; Bracha Goldsweig; Mary Sue Grossman; Les Kay; Natasha Kraft; Chuck Lucoff; Joseph Pinson; Andy Shefsky and Amy Tipp. The mission of the Jewish Federation of Omaha is to build and sustain a strong and vibrant Omaha Jewish Community and to support Jews in Israel and around the world. Agencies of the Federation are: Community Relations Committee, Jewish Community Center, Center for Jewish Life, Jewish Social Services, and the Jewish Press. Guidelines and highlights of the Jewish Press, including front page stories and announcements, can be found online at: wwwjewishomaha.org; click on ‘Jewish Press.’ Editorials express the view of the writer and are not necessarily representative of the views of the Jewish Press Board of Directors, the Jewish Federation of Omaha Board of Directors, or the Omaha Jewish community as a whole. The Jewish Press reserves the right to edit signed letters and articles for space and content. The Jewish Press is not responsible for the Kashrut of any product or establishment. Editorial The Jewish Press is an agency of the Jewish Federation of Omaha. Deadline for copy, ads and photos is: Thursday, 9 a.m., eight days prior to publication. E-mail editorial material and photos to: avandekamp@jewishomaha.org; send ads (in TIF or PDF format) to: rbusse@jewishomaha.org. Letters to the Editor Guidelines The Jewish Press welcomes Letters to the Editor. They may be sent via regular mail to: The Jewish Press, 333 So. 132 St., Omaha, NE 68154; via fax: 1.402.334.5422 or via e-mail to the Editor at: avandekamp@jewishomaha. org. Letters should be no longer than 250 words and must be single-spaced typed, not hand-written. Published letters should be confined to opinions and comments on articles or events. News items should not be submitted and printed as a “Letter to the Editor.” The Editor may edit letters for content and space restrictions. Letters may be published without giving an opposing view. Information shall be verified before printing. All letters must be signed by the writer. The Jewish Press will not publish letters that appear to be part of an organized campaign, nor letters copied from the Internet. No letters should be published from candidates running for office, but others may write on their behalf. Letters of thanks should be confined to commending an institution for a program, project or event, rather than personally thanking paid staff, unless the writer chooses to turn the “Letter to the Editor” into a paid personal ad or a news article about the event, project or program which the professional staff supervised. For information, contact Annette van de KampWright, Jewish Press Editor, 402.334.6450. Postal The Jewish Press (USPS 275620) is published weekly (except for the first week of January and July) on Friday for $40 per calendar year U.S.; $80 foreign, by the Jewish Federation of Omaha. Phone: 402.334.6448; FAX: 402.334.5422. Periodical postage paid at Omaha, NE. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to: The Jewish Press, 333 So. 132 St., Omaha, NE 68154-2198 or email to: jpress@jewishomaha.org.
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Editorials express the view of the writer and are not necessarily representative of the views of the Jewish Press Board of Directors, the Jewish Federation of Omaha Board of Directors, or the Omaha Jewish community as a whole.
Gift-Anxiety ANNETTE VAN DE KAMP-WRIGHT Jewish Press Editor Can you believe Hanukkah is almost here? I can’t. As I’m writing this, there are a million things to do and not enough time. Life has been getting frantic again, something I vowed I wouldn’t let happen after COVID-19. This was a chance to learn, I thought; we don’t have to be this busy all the time. I forgot that the reason we are busy is because we have rich, full lives with many opportunities to do, feel and experience good things—and people. It’s hard to say no. But when getting ready for a holiday feels stressful, we’re doing something wrong. I know exactly what it is I’m personally messing up: Hanukkah gifts. They are not necessary for a good holiday experience, yet, I long ago bought into the giftgiving fun. Show me some glitter and shiny bows, and I’m yours. Finding the right presents, picking out a color scheme for the wrapping and making each present as decorative as possible is my favorite part of Hanukkah—and what makes me the most anxious. Did I buy the right things? How many days are left? Did I spend the same on both kids so it’s not
unfair? Will they like it or will they think I’m clueless? Is a really cool T-shirt okay, or will that fall under ‘Yuck-I-got-clothes-for-Hanukkah?’ Have I missed any hints? And before you think my kids are monsters, all of this is in my own head. I have gift-anxiety. My presents need to be perfect. When my kids unwrap something, they should be ecstatic, they should be surprised, they should be so, so happy and remember the moment forever. Seriously, if you’re not crying tears of joy, I’m already searching for the receipt. I feel this way every birthday too, and frequently find myself wishing my kids were still toddlers. Back then, gifts were easy. Well, except for the super-cool roaring dinosaur that scared my son so much when he opened the box, he avoided it for years. But, you know, that was an exception. The question is, if picking out gifts stresses me out this much, why still do it? I’m not sure I know. Part habit, I guess; part not being able to pass up the chance to spoil my kids. I mean, eight nights, eight opportunities to make their day. I could buy seven really dumb presents and still come out a winner.
Where did all this start? Doesn’t it all make things a little too similar to Christmas? Hanukkah gifts are not traditional, they only were added later under pressure from the majority culture. Americans in general go a little nutty during this season, (hello, black Friday) and only in America do Jews give gifts for Hanukkah. Rabbi Menachem Creditor is the scholar in residence at the UJA-Federation of New York. In a 2019 article in Time Magazine, he said: “[Parents] saw that [giving gifts] was a way of creating joy around the time of Hanukkah. I think it wasn’t to be like Christmas, it was so that Jewish children would have joy on Hanukkah. I know it sounds like a narrow difference, but the distinguishing factor is, we didn’t want to do Christmas — we wanted to have joy.” Which, of course, opens up a whole new can of worms. What, we can’t have joy without materialistic things? The neurotic way I behave around the whole gift-giving conundrum makes me think I could be more joyful without presents. Of course, the moment those words are out of my mouth, I regret them. Hanukkah without presents is like latkes without sriracha, like hummus without Creole seasoning, like Shabbat dinner without cheese: it’s not who we are as a family. And so we’ll do things the way we’ve always done them and I’ll drive the whole family a little crazy. After all, there are worse things than a mother with gift-anxiety. Have I told you what Pesach is like at our house?
How moving to Denmark, a country with few fellow Jews, strengthened my Jewish identity REBECCA NACHMAN This article originally appeared on Alma Growing up, one of my favorite books was Number the Stars, Lois Lowry’s middle-grade novel about Denmark’s effort to smuggle its Jewish citizens to Sweden during World War II. The operation, which saved 7,220 of Denmark’s 7,800 Jews, has been remarkable to me since I first read about it: while other European countries gave in to antisemitic propganda and followed Hitler’s rule, Denmark resisted. A common explanation today is that Danes didn’t see their Jewish neighbors as “others” — they were just as Danish as anyone else. Why wouldn’t they help their fellow Danskere? Almost 80 years after the rescue of the Danish Jews, I moved to Copenhagen for grad school. Today, Denmark’s Jewish population stands at around 6,000 members, most of whom are congregated in the greater Copenhagen area. Coming from the Boston area, which is home to 248,000 Jews, and having attended Brandeis University, a historically Jewish college known for its robust Jewish population, landing in a country with such a small Jewish population was a big adjustment. But to my surprise, I preferred it. Growing up, my family attended a Reform synagogue, I went to Jewish summer camp and Hebrew school, and I had a bat mitzvah — but the whole time, I felt like I was just going through the motions. At no point did I feel any sort of Jewish community, nor did I feel the need for one. Plenty of my friends and teachers were Jewish, my classmates knew about Jewish holidays, and there is no shortage of Jewish delis and Judaica stores in Greater Boston. Being Jewish wasn’t something I consciously thought about because it was so normalized in my setting. But in Denmark, I’m often the first Jewish person someone has (knowingly) met. The Evangelical Lutheran Church is the national religion, but Denmark is overall an extremely atheistic country, with most people not being involved in any form of religious life. Here, I’ve had to make an effort to meet other Jews, and in doing so, I found an amazing
Jewish community. being said, I still feel significantly safer as a Jew here Despite Denmark’s small Jewish population, than I did in the U.S. (I have yet to hear a Dane comthere’s an official Jewish community, Det Jødiske pare vaccines to the Holocaust, baruch Hashem). Samfund, a Jewish museum, an Orthodox synaI still think of Number the Stars often, especially gogue, a Reform synagogue, a Chabad house, a Jew- when I’m at the same synagogue that the Jewish ish elementary school, youth groups and an annual characters attended, or when I walk past a site that cultural festival. There’s even a Jewish-Muslim biker club (yes, you read that right) that works to combat antisemitism and Islamophobia in Denmark and create mutual understanding between the two religious minorities. And this year, Copenhagen will host a gathering of Jewish young adults from all over Scandinavia. Whether it’s services at the Reform synagogue, challah baking at Chabad, or Shabbat dinner with the Jewish youth movement Copenhagen, Denmark. Credit: Marco Bottigelli/Getty Images at the Great Synagogue, I’m never at a loss for Jewish events to attend. was mentioned in the book. I have no Danish herI appreciate that the community isn’t strictly di- itage, so I’m not personally connected to the rescue vided by denomination — I see the same familiar of the Danish Jews. But, as schmaltzy as it sounds, I faces no matter which synagogue or organization feel a sense of poetic beauty in finding a Jewish home I go to. While I never felt like I found my place in in the same tiny Scandinavian country that came Greater Boston’s fragmented Jewish population, I together to save thousands of us so many years ago. immediately felt welcome in Jewish Denmark. Rebecca Nachman is Global Health master’s When we’re such a small minority (only 0.1% of the student at the University of Copenhagen. population), the need for a community is more The views and opinions expressed in this article are pressing. Having to deliberately seek out Jewish life those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the has made the connections I’ve forged all the more views of JTA or its parent company, 70 Faces Media. special. Danish society is notoriously hard for foreigners to integrate into, but through the Jewish TO SUBMIT ANNOUNCEMENTS community I’ve been able to make Copenhagen Announcements may be e-mailed to the Press feel like home. at jpress@jewishomaha.org; or mailed to 333 So. Of course, this isn’t to say that being Jewish in 132 St., Omaha, NE 68154. Readers can also subDenmark is always idyllic. In 2014 the Jewish school mit announcements -- births, b’nai mitzvahs, enwas vandalized, and in 2015 a terrorist attacked the gagements, marriages, commitment ceremonies or obituaries -- online at www.omahajewish Great Synagogue. I personally haven’t experienced press.com/site/forms/. Deadlines are normally antisemitism here, but I know that my experience nine days prior to publication, on Wednesdays, 9 as a recent transplant is different from those of Jewa.m. Please check the Jewish Press, for notices of ish Danes who have spent their lives here, and from early deadlines. those who more clearly present as Jewish. That
