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“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

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Take Two – Tips for a second trip down the aisle A second wedding is a chance to focus more on what you want as a couple instead of the wedding your parents may had hoped for you. Today there are no rules in second weddings; the happy couple can customize it as they see fit. Chances are someone you know will make another trip down the aisle at one point in his or her life. Individuals who have lost a spouse or have divorced may eventually choose to remarry. Second weddings are a great way for couples to showcase their personalities and don't have to be constrained by tradition. Here are some top tips for taking that trip down the aisle the second time around. • Put your first wedding out of your mind. Now is not the time to make comparisons. This wedding should be all about you and your new spouse-to-be. Go for something completely different than your prior wedding so there will be no side-by-side compar-

isons. • Choose a wedding party you really want. You can have a lavish wedding again, complete with a big bridal party. However, this time around you can choose the friends and family members you really desire to stand beside you, instead of individuals you may have felt obligated to include the first time around. • Go ahead and wear white. Tradition once stated that take-two brides were not supposed to wear white. Toss tradition aside and go ahead and do what you want. Just be sure the gown compliments your age and body shape and doesn't seem too virginal. If your previous wedding was annulled, you also may be able to wear a wedding veil. • Include your children in the festivities and planning. If you or your future spouse has children from a previous marriage, make them feel a part of this new blended family by including them in the second wedding. They may play a

role in the ceremony, such as making a speech or reading a religious passage. Other brides and grooms choose to have their children walk them down the aisle this time around. Also, involve the kids in the planning. They may be excited to help you choose wedding vendors or address invitations. • Personalize your event. Take the time to write your own vows, make handmade favors or single out the special people in your lives. • Feel free to be extravagant. You may be more established in life with a secure job and bigger paycheck. Therefore you can expand the wedding budget a little more. Go for all of the goodies you may have passed on with your previous marriage, such as exotic foods or that extralong honeymoon. • Involve the groom as well. Today's modern men want a say in their wedding just as much as the bride, say wedding experts. Make sure he is apprised of all the details and ensure that he is able

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“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

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JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

JUNE 2010 — 11

Financial 411: Surviving your wedding expenses

'Groom'ing Tips: Finding the Right Wedding Wardrobe for Your Groom

The average couple will spend between $20,000 and $30,000 on their wedding, a figure that does not include additional expenses such as an engagement ring or honeymoon. For many, that is 50 percent more than they have actually budgeted for the occasion. Underestimating wedding expenses can lead to financial distress even before the marriage has begun. In the not-so-distant past, weddings were largely financed by the bride and her parents. Things are much different now. Most weddings now are paid for by the bride and groom with little contribution from family. Young couples just starting out in life may find that weddings are more of a finan-

All eyes are typically on the bride during a wedding. But that doesn't mean the groom should be a shrinking violet. While the bridal gown may garner the "oohs" and "aahs," what the groom wears on his wedding day is quite important as well. In many ceremonies, the groom spends several minutes standing beside the alter awaiting his bride-tobe. Before the first notes of "Here Comes the Bride" are played, all eyes will be on him as he anxiously awaits the start of the ceremony. As such, it is essential that the groom look well polished and is dressed in accordance to the tone and scope of the wedding. Because most weddings are formal occasions, grooms often choose to wear a tuxedo or high-end suit. A well-fitted tuxedo combined with a formal shirt, tie and vest is the classic wedding ensemble. Generally the tuxedo jacket is single-breasted with three buttons and satin trim. This style is universally flattering to most men's frames. Accessorizing the tuxedo can mean different things. Some choose to wear a vest while others opt for a cummerbund. Others add suspenders. These accessories, including the tie or bow tie and the vest, can be all black like the tuxedo or can be coordinated with the colors of the wedding party. For example, if the bridesmaids are wearing butter yellow gowns, the groomsmen can wear yellow accessories. However, to set themselves apart from the groomsmen and ushers, grooms tend to go with the classic black and white and forego colors. On some occasions, grooms may choose to wear a white tuxedo. A well-groomed groom is also an important wedding day must. He should be well-shaven and have recently had a haircut. If he has facial hair, it should be trimmed and neat. Because he will be photographed all day long, a groom can choose to take some cues from his soonto-be-spouse. He may indulge in a manicure to ensure nails and cuticles

cial commitment than originally anticipated. Planning for the expected – and unexpected – can help couples survive wedding expenses. Savings Plan With most couples paying for the majority of the wedding themselves, it will be up to them to come up with the bulk of the wedding finances. Starting to save early is essential. Once you have set the date, begin saving immediately. Even if the wedding won't be a lavish affair, every wedding has some expenses. • To save, consider curbing recreational spending. Cut dinners out, trips to the movies or non-essential purchases. Place the

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money you would've spent into a wedding account. • Consider having automatic transfers or deposits into an account for forced savings. Many employers can deposit a portion of your paycheck into a separate account. Instead of a Christmas Club savings plan, you can have a Wedding Club. • Eliminate debt right away. It may seem counterproductive, but sometimes you have to spend money to save money. Instead of racking up high interest rate charges on credit card balances, pay down credit cards or other bills you have. Once you are in the clear, you can focus more on saving for the wedding. • If need be, have a long engagement so that you have ample time to save. Setting a Budget Many couples want a dream wedding but do not have the finances to afford a platinum event. But that doesn't mean they still can't have a lavish, beautiful wedding. Setting a budget means you can prioritize what you want and what you will pass up. It also provides a savings goal and a firm deadline. • Shop around for the average rates of vendors in your area. Work on the big-ticket items first before focusing on the smaller details. Once you have average prices, you can base your budget as such. • Add up the average costs of all of the items on your wish list. If it seems out of range, start removing things you can do without. For example, can you

have a brunch reception instead of an evening sitdown dinner to scale back costs? • Always set aside a little extra for those incidental expenses, such as tips for the waitstaff and donation to the church -- items you

may not think to factor in. • Don't expect wedding gifts to cover the cost of your wedding. While some guests are quite generous, others may not even cover the cost of their meal. Prioritize A dream wedding is a marriage between desires and reality. Today it is possible to recreate the look of designer gowns and other details with less-expensive options. Figure out your priorities and work from there. Consider these costsaving options. • Think about where you will be living after you are married. A residence takes priority over a lavish wedding. • Have the wedding party carry fresh-flower bouquets, but use less-expensive silk flowers or even

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fruit as centerpieces. • Ask your baker to create a small wedding display cake you can use for your photos and serve guests from a much cheaper sheet cake that is hidden in the kitchen. • Get married on a week-

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are neat. A dusting of translucent facial powder can tame shiny skin in photos. Some couples opt for teeth whitening prior to the wedding to ensure a sparkling smile. When dressing the rest of the men in a wedding, they should take their cues

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Accessory Essentials for Brides and Bridesmaids (MS) -- When it comes to weddings, much is made of the bride's wedding gown. Typically the end product of an exhausting yet enjoyable search, a bride's wedding gown is, along with the bride herself, often the focal point of the day. As central as the wedding dress is, brides also know their look is never complete without the right accessories. Arguably the most important accessory, aside from the groom, is the jewelry the bride and her bridesmaids will be wearing on the big day. According to Amy Yankelevitz, designer and founder of Hazel & Harlow Jewelry, how the bride selects the accessories and jewelry pieces for herself and her bridesmaid can be one of the most important, and very personal decisions for her special day. Incorporating family heirlooms, favorite keepsakes and contemporary styles can be complicated, but Amy believes in choosing delicate pendant, earrings and even bracelets, but always remember the focus is on the bride's face and neckline so keep your jewelry selections to just one or two special items. "A signature pair of earrings (our Heart of Gold styles are perfect) highlights the bride's hair and neckline without competing with the dress," says Yankelevitz. Because many brides recognize the importance of jewelry when creating their bridal ensemble, Yankelevitz offers the following jewelry tips for brides on their big day. • Match jewelry with your gown. No two brides are ever the same, but there are similarities between wedding gowns and certain jewelry that goes well with each type of

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gown. For example, the type of necklace a bride chooses will depend on the neckline of her gown. When the bride is interested in matching a piece of jewelry with her wedding dress, we believe the lines and flow of the dress are the defining accents to consider. If the bride has chosen a vintage, lacy gown, then something antique, or beaded and chandelier style is beautiful. For a more clean, modern and linear style dress, a simple charm or statement piece, such as Hazel & Harlow Love Bird Pendant or Crescent Moon, is ideal to enhance the wedding gown or dress without taking away from the complete ensemble Recognizing the myriad style wedding gowns, Hazel & Harlow jewelry offers an extensive catalog, ensuring that each and every bride will find the right accessories no matter the style of her dress. Made from fine sterling silver and 24K gold vermeil, all pieces of Hazel & Harlow jewelry are hand carved, hand etched and enhanced with beautifully set topaz stones. • Consider a splash of color. Today's brides aren't solely hoping to look elegant and demure. They're also hoping to attract attention. And nothing helps to do just that more than some colorful jewelry to complement your white wedding gown. Colored gems and even yellow diamonds are a growing trend among brides. If that's not your thing, the Hazel & Harlow Web site boasts an

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assortment of designer collections, enabling visitors to enjoy creations by comparable artists from all over the global fashion community, including luxury and moderate priced brands that speak to the trendsetter within every bride. • Go green. Perhaps no trend is more popular or hot button than the go green movement. As a result, many brides are showcasing their environmental side and embracing a growing trend among bridal jewelry, namely the choice of nature-inspired jewelry that includes themes such as flowers, butterflies, leaves, and rosettes. Hazel & Harlow is inspired by the whimsical, organic and feminine styles of vintage Paris, with the unique birds, floral motifs, animal and leafy carvings and filigrees so elegantly done by the designer. Everything about Hazel & Harlow jewelry evokes a mood and feeling of nature, and the growing interest in the collections of more floral inspired pieces is a true testament to the bride's

Both the Love Bird Pendant (above, l.) and the Crescent Moon (r.) from Hazel & Harlow are ideal choices to enhance a wedding gown or dress without taking away from the complete ensemble.

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(MS) – A couple's wedding day is one of the most important days of their lives. Typically months, if not years, of hard work and build up are involved until the big day finally arrives. Along with that anticipation comes plenty of planning. Couples must decide on everything from when and where to get married to whom to invite and where to register. Traditionally, wedding registries have allowed couples to guide guests toward the perfect wedding gift for their home. However as couples' needs have changed over the years, so have gift registries. Take for example, Sarah and Patrick who, like many of today's couples, had already lived together before walking down the aisle. When it came time to fill out a registry, Sarah and Patrick were at a loss as to what to list, realizing their household wasn't really in need of anything. "We already lived together and had all the kitchen gadgets, towels and bed sheets we could possibly need," says Sarah. Sarah and Patrick's dilemma wasn't unique, and neither was their eventual solution. After the rigors of planning a wedding, they were eager for the hard-earned respite that every couple longs for: their honeymoon. But as the economy has struggled, so, too, have many couples planning a dream honeymoon. With their hearts set on a Costa Rican getaway, Sarah and Patrick were unsure if they could afford the trip they had been looking forward to for months and months. However, Sarah and Patrick soon discovered Honeyfund.com, an online honeymoon registry catering to couples who could use some help planning and paying for their perfect honeymoon. "Our true passion is traveling, but we typically do it 'budget' style," says Sarah. "A honeymoon registry allowed us to travel in a 'once-in-a-lifetime' kind of way." Wedding guests can con-

cool activities like bungee jumping, white water rafting, a helicopter ride, Americas Cup sailing adventure, etc." Couples are even counseled on etiquette with respect to requesting financial gifts. Online gift tracking also enables cou-

ples to manage their gift payments and thank-you notes, ensuring the process will go as smoothly as possible. To learn more about Honeyfund, visit www.Honeyfund.com.

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veniently choose from a host of activities listed by the newlyweds themselves. From dinners and hotels to ferry and gondola rides, even airline and train tickets, Honeyfund enables cash-strapped newlyweds to get the R&R they deserve while ensuring guests' gifts are being put to good use. What's more, many couples find registering for their honeymoon is both fun and makes for a better honeymoon. In fact, that popularity is growing faster than ever according to a report from online wedding resource TheKnot.com, which showed that online Honeymoon registrants increased 50 percent from 2008 to 2009. Adding to the appeal of Honeyfund.com is that the site is free, making it quite possibly the only thing a couple can do when it comes to planning a wedding that won't force them to get out their checkbooks. "It was the perfect option for receiving gifts that we needed and could really use," says Robert, who took his new bride, Kili, as well as an extra $5,300 earned from their Honeyfund.com registry on a Mediterranean Cruise. "Kili is from California and I am from Washington, D.C. Because of Honeyfund our guests didn't have to lug gifts cross-country or worry about shipping. And

we didn't have to make one return or worry about lost gift receipts." In addition to making it easy on couples, Honeyfund.com also makes it easy on guests, who can pay via PayPal or simply print a Honeyfund certificate to include with their wedding cards. "Our guests loved it," says Denise, who along with her husband, Andy, enjoyed a dream honeymoon in Fiji. "Their response was overwhelmingly positive and they enjoyed reading about what we planned to do on our honeymoon -- really

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“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

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JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

JUNE 2010 — 9

Steps to choosing the right DJ for your wedding

Cake, crickets and other 'lucky' wedding foods

By: Mike Kallis Sound Source Music

By: Melissa Kossler Dutton For the Associated Press

By following these steps, your wedding reception will be a memorable event that you will talk about for years. Seek out a DJ service that can provide what you need. Who are you really hiring? A DJ with good communication skills has a great advantage over a “party” DJ. A solid greeting with crowd interaction makes everyone feel comfortable and ready for a good time. A DJ must be able to walk through an order of events without the uncomfortable “pause” that happens at many weddings. Making sure the order of events is correct is critical to the success of the reception. A solid DJ/MC makes this happen. Reputation is key: word of mouth is the best way to hear about a DJ. Many new-

comers have a low price, but have shortcomings with gear, experience, and the flow of the evening. BEWARE of people offering to do your show for next to nothing. Whether it’s friends of the family or relatives, if you have not seen or heard them, you may be in for a long evening. Price Price is the question I get asked the most. Price does not make a show. The question I ask customers is, “From the introductions to the last dance, the DJ is in charge of the evening. If I was inviting hundreds of people to my reception, whom would I trust to invest my money in to entertain my guests?” Gear It does matter! If you have 400 or 50 guests, the gear that the DJ brings is critical to the success of the event. Remember: it’s not how loud it is - it’s how

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good the music and the people speaking into the mics sound. Sometimes a system that is too big is just as bad as one that is too small. The right DJ will have the right sound thatbrings you onto the dance floor without hurting yours or grandma’s ears, and be clear when the all important toasts are made. Today, more than ever, lighting is very important. The entire hall or facility lit correctly will change the way people perceive your event. A disco ball and flashing lights will and can cheapen even the nicest venue. Today, LED lighting can wash walls and theme a room to a certain favorite color of the bride. Backlighting for the head table creates a focal point in which guests see the wedding party all dressed up and glowing from across the room. Before you book your wed-

By: Vickie McCall Victoria’s Hangups If you are on a budget for your wedding, which most brides are, there are many ways you can save yourself some major bucks and still have a gorgeous wedding. Look into rental options When it comes to rentals for your wedding day almost every wedding member’s apparel can be rented, which can save you BIG money. Wedding gowns, veils, flower girl

Organizing the reception It is imperative to meet with the DJ before your event to assure that he understands your needs before the big day. By doing this, you can create an itinerary sheet so that everyone down to the pho-

The right music can convey the emotions of all the special moments of your wedding day.

tographer knows the time and order of events at the reception. Mike Kallis has owned and operated a music store for over 22 years. He has deejayed hundreds of events over the years and works with DJs in his music store on a daily basis.

dresses, bridesmaid dresses, jewelry, tuxedos, vest, ties, shoes, major wedding accessories and decorations.

lucky and find a gown that another bride bought and never even wore. The same can be found for bridesmaid dresses and tuxedos.

Look into pre-owned Many times you can find a wedding gown that was purchased for an outrageous amount and get it at a fraction of that price because it was worn once! It may need a few alterations but even at that you can’t beat a designer name wedding gown at a discounted price. Once in a while you may even get

Look for discounts and sale items Shop around and get some prices so you will know what an average price for invitations, accessories, and decorations so when you are shopping you can compare prices and look for some good sale or discounted items.

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Turn to family and friends Have your family and friends rack their brains and see if they know any cake decorators, photographers, florists, or DJs. These are all areas that can be of high expense that maybe if you name drop you can save some money without having to compromise on quality.

tune, she said. The resort has seen growing interest from couples outside of Mexico in the foods and traditions of the region, she said. "Couples today are seeking a more personalized and authentic experience when they host a destination wedding that is reflected in both the food and venue," she said. Brides and grooms discussing their celebrations on the wedding website TheKnot.com also seem more interested than before in incorporating traditional elements into their plans, said Rebecca Dolgin, an executive editor for the site. "Couples reaching into their own culture is more popular now," she said. "Incorporating culture is creating a buzz on the message boards." Often, foods are considered lucky because of shape, color or taste, Dolgin explained. Italians serve almonds at weddings because their bittersweet taste represents life, she said. The almonds are sugarcoated to wish the couple more sweetness than bitterness. Common at a Chinese

Brides and grooms hoping to add some good fortune to their marriages have some interesting options when planning a wedding feast. Many cultures around the globe have identified foods for newlyweds that supposedly will bring good luck, fertility or other blessings. The foods range from fried crickets to candied almonds to fish. Attaching symbolism to food is a common practice throughout the world, said Amy Bentley, associate professor of food studies at New York University. "All rituals and holidays and celebrations involve food," she said. "This is somewhat universal." In Mexico, brides and grooms sometimes dine on fried crickets, lentil soup, and a bean, rice and agave dish, said Beatriz Mejia, director of celebrations at One and Only Palmilla resort in Los Cabos, Mexico. The crickets and the rice dish are said to bring fertility and good luck, and the soup is associated with good luck and good for-

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In Caribbean countries, special attention is paid to the groom's sexual performance on the wedding night, said Caitlin Austin, a spokeswoman for Grace Bay Club in the Turks and Caicos. Grooms are encouraged to eat the pistil of a conch "to increase their drive," she said. "The conch's pistil is viewed by locals as nature's Viagra." Conch meat also is commonly served to wedding guests because islanders believe it's an aphrodisiac, she said. Wedding cake, one of the oldest elements of a wedding banquet, also has connections to luck and fertility. "The traditionally accepted practice is for the This undated photo provided by Grace Bay Resorts shows a Caribbean bride to have the first bite; Conch Salad. Brides and grooms hoping to add some good fortune to their otherwise, she'd be childmarriages have some interesting options to consider when planning a wed- less and barren," Dolgin said. ding feast. (AP Photo/Grace Bay Resorts) Early English cakes were fruit cakes, and brides wedding is whole fish, added Pam Frese, a profes- used to count the number because the Chinese word sor of anthropology at the of raisins in their piece of for fish sounds similar to College of Wooster in cake to see how many chilthe word for abundance, Ohio. Fish and other white dren they would bear, Dolgin said. meats, such as turkey and Frese said. "The cake has power," "The Chinese also chicken, are common wedbelieve that eating spring ding foods because of old she said. "It promises rolls will bring wealth and beliefs that women had reproductivity." Wedding cakes changed prosperity," she said. "Due whiter blood than men, to its color and size, it is she said. White meats were in texture and appearance also thought to resemble thought to strengthen in the 1920s, when lighter gold bars." women's blood, so they cakes with fluffy, creamy Moroccan couples also were served at weddings to frosting became more popular. But the symbolism eat fish because it's an energize the bride. ancient symbol of fertility, "It was extra strength to remained, Dolgin said. she said. her on her wedding night The white cake representFish appears on the so she can become a moth- ed the bride's purity. The decorations of flowers and menu at many weddings, er," Frese said. other signs of spring are meant to represent birth and new life, she said. "It's this little bubble of rmal & Pageant Wear Sh nature in the middle of a o F , opp dal i wedding," Frese said. "It's r e B the promise of fertility Bridal Gowns, Tuxedo Rental, Bridesmaids Dresses, that's embedded in Flower Girl Dresses, Bridal Accessories, spring." Prom & Pageant Wear

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Music Song lists are a thing of the past. With digital music, most DJs have thousands of songs to make your event fun. If a DJ offers a song list BEWARE - you don’t want your wedding to sound like the one you were at last weekend. Every wedding reception should be customized with music and the guests should get the opportunity to request dance music all night long.

A few money saving tips for your big day

We also offer rental on:

Discounted Bridal Services

ding, remember to ask the DJ what lighting options can be provided to enhance your event.

FURNITURE • BEDDING • ACCESSORIES

E. Route 16 • Ashmore, IL 349-8822 • 1-800-446-3647 M ONDAY 9 AM - 8 PM T UESDAY - S ATURDAY 9 AM - 5 PM

800 CHARLESTON AVE., MATTOON, IL PHONE/FAX (217) 235-3731

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8 — JUNE 2010

“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

JUNE 2010 — 5

The pressure's on for grooms with two left feet

Wedding Photography: What are you paying for?

By: LeAnne Italie Associated Press Writer

By: Susan M. Gano-Young Susan M. Gano-Young Digital Photography

Looking silly — or worse — during the first dance as a married couple rates way up there on the scale of wedding stress for grooms who are terrified of anything fancier than the high school prom sway. "It's not Emily Post's dance anymore," said Crista Tharp, a wedding planner in Kokomo, Ind. "Some are doing rap, hiphop, break dancing in little snippets. Most grooms would probably nix the dance, but they're not given that option." Motivated by television's "Dancing with the Stars" and wacky wedding dance YouTube videos, more couples are building fancy footwork into their big-day budgets, turning up the pressure on members of the wedding party with two left feet. For those who can't dance — but will be singled out by cameras and watching guests — setting a clear goal is a good place to begin, dance instructors suggest. Are you merely looking to survive with a few basic steps, or are you going all-in with dance sequences put together with help from an instructor or a wedding choreographer? Groom-to-be Jerry Karran, 28, a video editor in New York City, decided on regular lessons at a dance studio ahead of his wedding in July with 400 invited guests. He tried watching instructional videos online, but they left him confused. "I'm very nervous," he said. "I'm not nervous about anything else concerning the wedding but that. I can't dance, like, at all. Everybody's looking at you. I don't want to look stupid messing up, or stepping on her toes or something." Dance lessons helped calm Jeremy Gorelick, 30, when he got married in April at Johns Hopkins University, where he met his wife. He has always enjoyed dancing in clubs, but slow dancing was "THE worry of the wedding for both of us." They took lessons together, but he often practiced on his own with a

broom. That, Gorelick said, was a misstep because it wasn't at all like leading his bride on the dance floor. "A broom will do whatever you do, so it was actually an exercise in futility and probably did more damage," said Gorelick, of New York City and White Sulphur Springs, N.Y.

Michael Drazin, right, and his fiance Shelley Kapitulik take a dance lesson in preparation for their June wedding at the Arthur Murray Dance Studios in Greenwich, Conn., Tuesday, May 25, 2010. (AP Photo/Douglas Healey).

Start taking lessons well in advance of the big day to make your movements more instinctive and less dependent on shaky, shortterm memory, instructors recommend. Beginning at least six months ahead of a wedding is ideal, but six weeks would suffice, so long as at least four lessons are involved. Start with group lessons, many suggest, to get comfortable on a dance floor and boost confidence. Then take private instruction to work on a specific routine or dance. Jackie Horner, who was Gorelick's instructor, often teaches whole wedding parties how to dance. While women, too, can be dance-challenged, men are often more nervous because they must also learn how to lead, she said. "I say to them, dancing is just walking to music,"

Horner said. "I have them walk around the room for me to just feel the music a little bit, because there are men who do not have any rhythm at all. Usually it's a little easier than they thought." Gorelick said beginners should advocate for a short song. He and his wife chose "The Way I Am" by Ingrid Michaelson after their instructor steered them away from a longer tune, "based on the fact that I seemed so tense. She didn't want me to be out there for an eternity, which is sort of what it felt like." James Joseph, who wrote the book "Every Man's Survival Guide to Ballroom Dancing" (BlueChip, 2010), said taking lessons is fine if couples have the time, money and inclination. For those in dance-floor survival mode, try embellishing the basic side step with a simple change of footwork, a slow rotation or some underarm turns. "If anyone asks, tell them it's a foxtrot," he said. Change steps when the music changes, from verse to chorus, for instance, to avoid getting lost. Making four or five changes, with a dip in the middle and at the end, can look more difficult than it really is. Working with a choreographer, Joseph said, may be more trouble than it's worth. "If you work with a teacher, there's a temptation to add choreography that you might not be able to handle," he said. "Don't get in over your head." Practicing in wedding clothes, including shoes, also helps lessen anxiety, said Joseph, a former twoleft-footer who lives in Jackson Hole, Wyo. Video-

tape a practice session to see what needs work — and practice, practice, practice. Grooms aren't the only front-and-center wedding participants who may be jittery about big dances. In 2006, at age 62, bawdy TV personality Jerry Springer brought tears to the set of "Dancing with the Stars" with an on-air kiss for his daughter Katie after a waltz he learned so he could dance at her wedding that December. "I've never really danced," Springer, now 66, said in an interview. "So the night of the wedding, it's time for the big fatherdaughter dance. In the middle of it, Katie looks up at me and says, 'Dad, nobody can see our feet.'

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They were covered by her big gown. My advice to dads unsure if they can dance for their daughter's wedding is to make sure they have a big gown. Then you can get by doing anything." Shelley Kapitulik, 29, and her fiance, Michael Drazin, 27, both of Greenwich, Conn., hope to do more than just get by when they dance to the Michael Buble cover of James Taylor's "How Sweet It Is (To be Loved by You)" at their June reception. They plan a swing dance, and took lessons to get a nervous Drazin over the hump. "The more we dance and I make mistakes, we figure out how to just keep going, which has decreased the anxiety level," he said.

UST ULIE’S

Julie Miller & Darlene Highland Call Today for an Appointment! 1614 Broadway 235-0855

‘We Do’ Weddings

If you like dining with us, then you’ll love the way we cater weddings!

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We can seat up to 100 people or cater ANY size event at your location.

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You've set the date, the reception hall is reserved, flowers are ordered, the music has been chosen, you are interviewing photographers and they want... how much?!? Frugality is fine, but wedding photos are not one of the places you should try to save money. Emotions must be captured during moments that cannot be recreated, and you'll want these images to last a lifetime. So why does wedding photography seem so expensive? The photographer is only working a few hours, right? Not really. Photography is not a commodity. The creativity and time spent to create something unique is a big part of the photographer's time, something the bride and groom will not see. A professional wedding photographer works very hard for the fee they request. Many hours can be spent in post-production preparing your images for picture-perfect printing. Most couples underestimate the cost of their photographer by as much as 50%! A good rule of thumb is to expect to pay twice as much as you are considering. A typical wedding photographer is usually 15-25% of the total wedding cost. When you really have to watch your budget, ask yourself these questions: • What do we expect from our wedding photographer? • Do we want something simple, or something truly customized to our needs? • Do we want an album, enlargements, or a CD of the images? • What are the different styles of photography? • How many hours will we need a photographer? The time your photographer spends on your wedding will depend on what type of events you want captured and is really up to you. No two weddings are the same, and your options will vary. This can include: • Engagement photos • Rehearsal dinners and services

dance, father/daughter dance, mother/son dance, bridal party dance, cake cutting, bouquet and garter, and final departure from the reception Some couples, especially those who are having smaller, more intimate weddings, may opt for just a few formal photographs and some pictures taken during the ceremony to keep costs at a minimn, yet still have quality photos.

For many couples today, finding a photographer you can afford that will get you the results you deserve may not be an easy task, but it can be accomplished. For more information, visit www.smgyphoto.com

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Make your beauty plan now By: Reneé England Merle Norman

• Bride preparation • Formal photos before the ceremony • Wedding ceremony • Formal photos after the

Every smile, every laugh, every moment. Make the memories of your special once-in-a-lifetime day last forever.

ceremony • Leaving the church • Reception photography, including grand entrance, speeches, toasts, first

WEDDING PORTRAITS & CONTEMPORARY PHOTOGRAPHY

The date is set but what about a beauty plan? You'll see better results (smoother skin and flawless makeup) for your wedding when you start prepping at least one month ahead. Pencil in some time now with a professional make up or beauty consultant for a personalized skincare and color consultation. A professional will determine an ideal regimen and timeline that brings the most radiant results on the big day and beyond. Correct foundation and powder shades are key for any photographs taken. Always take into consideration what your skin color will be on your big day. Beauty experts suggest veering slightly darker than your normal skin tone and/or matching your face color to the tone of your shoulders and chest for a seamless effect. Obtaining advice such as this can be a major stress saver as well as bonding time for you and your bridal party.

All Inclusive Packages to Choose from Renee England, Owner 1608 Broadway • Mattoon, IL

(217) 234-4277

RECEPTIONS • REHERSAL DINNERS

Miller’s Banquet Facility

Banquet Rooms FREE When Your Party Orders From Our Menu!

For All Your Special Occasions

Little Mexico

Weddings • Meetings • Dances • Parties Contact Hilary Spitz at 348-3335 or 254-4176 307 6th Street • Charleston

American Grille & Cantina

1810 Charleston Avenue Mattoon • 234-4535

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“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

6 — JUNE 2010

JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

“I DO” BRIDAL GUIDE

JOURNAL GAZETTE & TIMES-COURIER

Approaching the issue of children at weddings

Avoid common wedding scams

There are no etiquette rules regarding whether children should attend weddings. The decision is entirely up to the couple getting married. If you are a guest invited to a wedding and your children are not, there is no reason to take offense. You should certainly respect the wishes of the bride and groom. It is improper to turn up at the occasion with your children and put the couple on the spot. Young children are unpredictable and cannot be trusted to behave at all times. Couples may not want to have their festivities – often occasions that cost $30,000 or more – to be interrupted by children who may be a little too boisterous. Also, children may be an inconvenience to adults simply looking to have a good time. How much can you enjoy yourself if you are constantly keeping an eye on a toddler or tending to an infant? Chances are your wedding experience will be compromised. All in all, many other couples welcome the idea of having children at their weddings. Children repre-

Matthew and Ellen had the wedding of their dreams on a beautiful June day. All of the details went off without a hitch, or so they thought. When the time arrived to receive their wedding photo albums and video a few months after the wedding, the photographer who had promised them the world closed up shop, filed for bankruptcy and absconded with the new couple's precious memories. Tales of wedding woes frequent the news, especially as wedding season approaches. Stories about reception sites that have double-booked rooms, photographers who have not delivered photos, bridal gown shops that don't have a dress finished on time and so many similar events are no longer a rarity. The majority of wedding vendors are respectable businesses looking to provide couples with the ideal services and memories of their special day. However, some other vendors are just looking to make money at all costs. Avoiding trouble with your wedding means taking matters into your own hands and thoroughly protecting yourself. • Investigate the business or individual before exchanging money. A simple search online for reviews or checking with the Better Business Bureau should reveal if a business has any complaints against it. Com-

sent the extended family and the next generation. They can add life to a party and look adorable dressed in party clothes. If your child is invited to a wedding, or you are the happy couple tying the knot, consider these tips. • Although children of all ages may be welcome, it's often better to limit children to ages 4 and older, especially if they'll be participating in the ceremony as a ring bearer or flower girl. Children of this age are better able to take direction and are a little more mature. Check if your ceremony site has rules regarding children in the ceremony. • If you want to compromise when inviting children, allow them to be present at the church or synagogue, but restrict them from the reception. You can carefully word this on the invitation by saying "Adult Reception." • Talk to the caterer to find out if there is a reduced fare on children's dinners. This can save on costs, particularly if children aren't likely to eat an adult meal. • Children invited to the

wedding reception should be dressed accordingly for the formality of the event. Now is not the time for sneakers and jeans. • Provide entertainment for children during the lulls of the event. Kids may love to get up and dance, but become antsy during dinner courses. Pack along a goodie bag of games, DVDs and toys that can keep them occupied. • Find out if you can bring along a kid's chaperone, namely a babysitter or friend who can keep an eye on the kids while you enjoy yourself. • The bride and groom may want to set up a "kiddie corral" area in the reception room, particularly if they plan to invite a lot of young children. Put down foam interlocking mats and fence off the area so kids are contained. • If the wedding will be open to children, consider adjusting the hours so that it takes place earlier in the day. This way parents will have time to get their children to bed on or close to their normal bedtime.

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plaints can range from bad service to lawsuits. This easy step can protect couples from potentially going into business with a company that should not be trusted. • Get word-of-mouth recommendations. A couple who has used a particular bridal vendor and had pleasant results is the best advertisement. Ask friends and family members who have gotten married who they used for flowers, photos, music and more. Using the same people is not being a copy-cat; it's being a shrewd consumer. • Contracts are essential. Have all of the details of the business transaction spelled out in a contract that both the vendor and you sign. Writing "Size 8" gown is not enough. Make sure the model number, price, details regarding deposits, alterations, etc., are included. DJs can write how many hours they will be playing music, how many breaks they will take, who exactly will be handling the wedding itself, and other details. • Check who will be servicing your wedding. On occasion a business may subcontract its services. For example, the photographer you meet at the studio may not be the photographer who shows up at your wedding. If you have a preference as to who services your event, be sure to request that person and have it included in the contract.

• Meeting Room for up to 40 People - Graduations - Wedding Showers - Business Meetings - Baby Showers - Anniversarys Can bring in food & beverage Call for Availabilty & Rates

• Free Continental Breakfast - Hot & Cold • Free High Speed Wireless Internet

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• Obtain certification. Some scams are more subtle. For instance, bridal shops who remove designer labels from gowns because they are not authorized retailers is a subtle scam. Another is jewelry stores that misrepresent the quality of diamonds and other jewelry. Be sure to get legitimate certification when purchasing anything of value. • Ensure the vendor has the equipment described. Some limousine companies may send out flyers advertising high-end vehicles they don't actually own or have access to. They subsequently arrive on your wedding day with a different vehicle. Without a contract specifying the vehicle of your choice, you have little recourse against the company. Filter out shady brokers by asking to come inspect their vehicles on an off-day, like Tuesday afternoon. You want to verify that they indeed own the limo, and that it's in good condition. • Skimpy floral arrangements. Upon booking a florist, most businesses will sit down with couples and work up a sample bouquet or arrangement based on personal preferences. Come the wedding day, however, couples might find their arrangements have considerably fewer flowers in them or they're not the blooms originally chosen. Flowers are expensive, and some florists cut costs by skimping on the amount of actual flowers (not filler) they use. Be sure contracts spell out how many flowers will be in each arrangement, what type of flowers, how many centerpieces, bouquets, boutonnieres, etc. Be sure you can enjoy your wedding and get the services you paid for by being savvy consumers. Don't simply open up your wallet to the first vendor you meet.

Exceptional Receptions Let us ensure your wedding day celebration is everything you dreamed it would be. To schedule a complimentary consultation with our event coordinator, please call Mae at 217-234-4855.

Effingham 115 W. Banker St.

217-342-3103

Hunan Restaurant

Banquet Facility

For Rehearsal Dinners

2 Rooms Avail. Seats up to 150

116 S. 17th Street • Mattoon • 217-234-4855 • www.chinesehunan.com

JUNE 2010 — 7

Wedding Glossary Planning a wedding? There are certain terms that every bride and groom should learn so they can be more informed in the process. A-line: or Princess gowns have vertical seams flowing from the shoulders down to a flared skirt (creating an 'A' shape). Ascot: A wide, formal tie generally reserved for formal daytime weddings. Ball gown: or ballerina gown, is the most traditional wedding gown. It has a full bodice and a synched waistline that falls into a full skirt Basque: A style of waistline that drops 2-inches below the natural waist and often dips into a point in the center. Batiste: A light transparent wedding gown fabric. Blusher: A short veil that covers the brides' face before the ceremony. Bodice: Close, upper-fitting part of the dress. Bomboniere: An Italian term for 'guest favors', given to wedding guests as a keepsake in appreciation of their attendance. Boutonniere: Flower or flowers that are worn by the men in the wedding party. The boutonniere always should be affixed to the left side of the jacket. Brocade: A thick woven fabric with raised designs, typical in Victorian wedding gowns and traditionally popular in fall and winter wedding gowns. Buttercream: Most common icing used on wedding cakes. Cascade: A waterfall of flowers and greenery anchored to a hand-held base. Cathedral train: Train, or long piece of fabric that extends 61/2 to 71/2 feet from the waist. Chiffon: Made from silk or rayon, is sheer and transparent, so it's often layered. A popular fabric for the overskirts, sheer sleeves and wraps of wedding gowns. Cornelli: Decorative form of icing that resembles lacework on wedding cakes. Corsage: From the French 'bust'. A corsage is an arrangement of flowers pinned to the bodice of a woman's dress. Corsages come in pin-on, wrist and hand-held styles. Corsages are typically worn by mothers and grandmothers. Corset: A form-fitting, strapless or spaghetti-strap bodice with boning, lace-up or snap closures. Cutaway Jacket: Jacket which tapers from the front waist button to a long, wide back tail; accessories include a wing-collar shirt with an ascot and a coordinating vest. Croquenbouche: A wedding cake formed with stacked cream puffs. Damask: Like brocade it has raised designs, but is lighter in weight. Dowry: An endowment which a bride brings to her husband in marriage. Duchesse Satin: A silk and rayon hybrid woven to look like satin. Empire: A style of gown with a high waistline (right under the bust) which falls to a slimmer skirt, popular with medieval wedding gowns. Fianc: French for a betrothed man. Fiance: French for a betrothed woman. Fondant: This thick wedding cake icing has a gummy, porcelain finish perfect for making confectionary flowers and faux pearls. Ganache: Rich chocolate filling or topping made from chocolate and heavy cream. Garland: Flowers and/or green leaves that are draped over railings. Georgette: A sheer fabric of polyester/silk with a crinkle crepe-like surface. Girdle: The outer edge or the widest part of the diamond forming a band around the stone. Groom's Cake: a smaller wedding cake; themed to the groom's interests. Illusion: Fine netting used for veils, headpieces, and on the sleeves and necklines of dresses. Inclusion: An internal imperfection on a diamond. Nosegay: Small bouquet featuring posies. Satin: The most popular wedding gown fabric, glossy on one side. Sheath: A slim, body-hugging wedding dress silhouette. Save the Date Cards: Informal announcements which precede the wedding invitations by several months ahead, ideal for weddings close to major holidays. Scoop: U-shaped wedding gown neckline. Silk: The most expensive and rich wedding dresses fabric; there are several different textures, but most are smooth, glossy and sleek. Strapless: Wedding bodice without straps. Sweetheart: Wedding dress neckline that resembles the top half of a heart. Taffeta: Slightly crunchy fabric with a slight ribbing effect. Tails: A formal tuxedo coat that's short in front and has two long tails in the back. Tiers: Stacked layers of cake. Tea Length: Length of dress or skirt that falls several inches above the ankles. Topiary: Flowers or foliage trained and trimmed into geometric shapes, often resembling miniature trees or animals. Tulle: Used in wedding skirts and veils; silk, nylon or rayon netting. Tussy Mussy: Silver cone-shaped holder for a bouquet. Velvet: Thick, soft fabric similar in effect to felt and often used for winter wedding gowns and wraps. V-neck: Also called a plunging neckline or low-cut neckline, dips down in the front.