Twilight for Life by Joel Emmett

Twilight For Life Finding Meaning in Stephenie Meyerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Twilight - and in Life

Joel & Ella Emmett

Visit EllaEmmett.com and TwilightNewsSite.com This book has not been approved, licensed or sponsored by any person or entity that created or produced the Twilight Saga books or films.

For Stephenie Meyer Thank You for giving Bella Swan such a rich life and for enriching our lives at the same time.

1. Welcome to Forks

2. Seeing Clearly

3. Patterns

4. Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

5. Time vs. Eternity

6. Bella vs. Edward

7. Worldviews

8. Wisdom Journeys

9. Becoming the Hero

10. Keys

11. The Wisdom Cycle

12. Learn

100

13. Believe

106

14. Change

119

15. Commit

138

16. The Clearing

157

17. Forks

165

18. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s with us

174

19. And Then What?

186

Appendix: The Worldview Cycle and the Characters of the Twilight Saga Notes

1. Welcome to Forks “Tell me what you’re thinking,” he whispered. I looked to see his eyes watching me, suddenly intent. “It’s still so strange for me, not knowing.” “You know, the rest of us feel that way all the time.” “It’s a hard life.” Did I imagine the hint of regret in his tone? “But you didn’t tell me.” “I was wishing I could know what you were thinking…” I hesitated. “And?” “I was wishing that I could believe that you were real. And I was wishing that I wasn’t afraid.”

These lines are from the Meadow scene of Stephenie Meyer’s first book, Twilight. They came to her in a dream, before dawn, on the morning of June 2, 2003.

In her dream, Edward Cullen has led Bella Swan to a heavenly Meadow. They sit and talk. They express their feelings for one another. And they talk about their challenges -- past, present, and future. This passage is in the middle of Twilight. It is not only the center of the book, but it is also central to the book. It spells out the dramatic journey Bella and Edward face. The two of them are halfway done, yet still have halfway to go. From this midpoint, Edward rehearses the past -- how they met, how he responded, and why. And then, Bella begins to lay out their future, outlining the issues they still face. Edward wants to know how Bella feels. He can read the minds of anyone else, which is good enough to get by. But when people love each other, like they do, they need to talk things through -- which is more than just knowing what the other thinks. And since he can’t read her mind anyway, that works out quite nicely. Bella points out that “the rest of us” often feel “strange” about life, because like Edward, we go around “not knowing” what we need to know. Edward agrees and says that, as a result, “it’s a hard life.” Indeed, “not knowing” is the main problem of life. It’s what makes life so hard. It causes nearly every problem people face. In the center of this heavenly meadow here on Earth, an Eden where the lion lays down with the lamb, Bella makes three wishes to her angelic Edward: First, she wishes she knew more -- in this case, what

Edward was thinking. Second, she wishes she could believe what she already knew to be true. Here, she is talking about truly believing that Edward is a vampire, and believing that he truly loves her. And third, she wishes that she didn’t have so many fears, because then they would feel free to change their relationship -- become closer, and finally commit to each other. Their conversation continues, and since it is so central to Twilight, it’s worth a close look: “I don’t want you to be afraid.” His voice was just a soft murmur. I heard what he couldn’t truthfully say, that I didn’t need to be afraid, that there was nothing to fear. “Well, that’s not exactly the fear I meant, though that’s certainly something to think about.” So quickly that I missed his movement, he was half sitting, propped up on his right arm, his left palm still in my hands. His angel’s face was only a few inches from mine. I might have -- should have -flinched away from his unexpected closeness, but I was unable to move. His golden eyes mesmerized me. “What are you afraid of, then?” he whispered intently. But I couldn’t answer. As I had just that once before, I smelled his cool breath in my face. Sweet, delicious, the scent made my mouth water. It was unlike anything else. Instinctively, unthinkingly, I leaned closer, inhaling. And he was gone, his hand ripped from mine. In the time it took my eyes to focus, he was twenty feet away, standing at the edge of the small meadow, in the deep shade of a huge fir tree. He stared at me, his eyes dark in the shadows, his expression unreadable. I could feel the hurt and shock on my face. My empty hands stung. “I’m… sorry… Edward,” I whispered.

Unfortunately, what happened next confirmed Bella’s fears.

How can she get closer to Edward, and move forward in their romance, and their lives... together? If they do become closer, will he run away again -- due to his own fears of harming her? So, her fears are pretty much the same things that she doesn’t know; again, the problem is “not knowing.” The big question for Bella is: How can she learn what she needs to know, so she can become the hero of her story? It is a question that everyone faces, including those reading her story. Bella and Edward look at stories to see what can be learned from them, including Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights, and the tale of the Third Wife. Then, they apply what they learned from those characters to their own lives. Readers can do the same with Twilight. At the start of their story, Bella and Edward are not sure what to do with their lives. Many people feel the same way. Some worry that their lives will end up being meaningless. Because if something seems meaningless, then it might be... worthless. And no one wants to be worthless. So Bella shows people a way to find meaning in their lives -- in the story, and out. She shows them how to make their lives worthwhile. Every story has meaning. If it didn’t, it wouldn’t be a story. If people can find that meaning in the stories they read, view, or hear, then they can probably find the meaning in their own lives. Here’s how:

Every story has a hero. Readers may identify with that hero. They usually do. Because if they figure out how the hero succeeds, maybe they can do the same thing. Like Bella, they can become the hero of their own life’s story. Just as Bella and Edward each find different meanings in the same stories, readers can too. And that’s great. The best stories offer lots of different meanings for lots of different people. So, how can people learn what they need to know to become the hero of their own life’s story? Giving a clear answer to that, and other questions about life and its meaning, are one of the reasons the Twilight Saga is so deeply moving, and beloved by its millions of fans. Like us.

Stories need a beginning, a middle, and an end. Those parts give the story its action. And they give the story a point. That point is often the moral of the story. Stories also need a hero. Heroes make it so the readers feel the story, too. They relate to them. So heroes make the story symbolic. While reading, the hero and the reader become one. And their story becomes a metaphor for life. The hero follows a pattern for learning how to live better. In a good story, the pattern works in real life too. It shows truth. Without those things, the events would not be a story. They would just be another part of a random span of life, real or imagined.

2. Seeing Clearly When I finished putting my clothes in the old pine dresser, I took my bag of bathroom necessities and went to the communal bathroom to clean myself up after the day of travel. I looked at my face in the mirror as I brushed through my tangled, damp hair. Maybe it was the light, but already I looked sallower, unhealthy. My skin could be pretty — it was very clear, almost translucent-looking — but it all depended on color. I had no color here. Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forced to admit that I was lying to myself. It wasn’t just physically that I’d never fit in. And if I couldn’t find a niche in a school with three thousand people, what were my chances here? I didn’t relate well to people my age. Maybe the truth was that I didn’t relate well to people, period. Even my mother, who I was closer to than anyone else on the planet, was never in harmony with me, never on exactly the same page. Sometimes I wondered if I was seeing the same things through my eyes that the rest of the world was seeing through theirs. Maybe there was a glitch in my brain. But the cause didn’t matter. All that mattered was the effect. And tomorrow would be just the beginning.

This is another important passage in Twilight. Bella is settling into her new home, but feels far from settled. And the problem isn’t really her new home. It’s her. Why does Bella feel this way? First, there is her new look. “Sallower, unhealthy.” Perhaps the words she is searching for is: “More like a vampire.” As soon as she arrives in Forks, she looks more pale. She can’t sleep. She has trouble dealing with humans. She freezes under stress. Or holds her breath. Her heart keeps stopping. She even smells like a vampire, “floral, somehow...” And she is beautiful. Different, yet appealing. Seductive, even. You can tell because of how everyone at school reacts to her. Everyone wants to see her, talk to her. The boys fall over themselves. The girls are either very nice, or very cold. Even some of the teachers stop to gawk. And then there’s Jacob. “You don’t see yourself very clearly, you know,” Edward explains later, “but you didn’t hear what every human male in this school was thinking on your first day.” So Edward reveals the cause of this effect: Bella is beautiful and different. Vampire-like. Her destiny is along a different path than the others. “Vampire queen of the immortal world” is, after all, a fairly unusual job description. The reason Bella feels unsettled is because of how she sees things. Including herself. She is still “not knowing.” And you can tell that, because of how she views Cause and Effect: “The cause didn’t matter. All

that mattered was the effect.” In this, she isn’t very different. Lots of people feel the same way. If there is no principle of Cause and Effect, then life is just a matter of luck. At this point, Bella agrees. Many people do. “Breakfast with Charlie was a quiet event. He wished me good luck at school. I thanked him, knowing his hope was wasted. Good luck tended to avoid me.”

Is Bella right? How lucky is Bella on her first day at Forks High School? • “The engine started quickly, to my relief.” • “The antique radio worked, a plus that I hadn’t expected.” • “Inside, it was brightly lit, and warmer than I’d hoped.” • “I was glad to see that most of the cars were older like mine, nothing flashy.” • “My plain black jacket didn’t stand out, I noticed with relief.” • “Once I got around the cafeteria, building three was easy to spot.” • “At least my skin wouldn’t be a standout here.” • “At least he sent me to an empty desk at the back without introducing me to the class.”

• “Bronte, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Faulkner. I’d already read everything. That was comforting… and boring.” • “I’m headed toward building four, I could show you the way...” So far, Bella seems pretty lucky (especially when you take her “At least...” asides), but still seems to feel downbeat about her day. Perhaps she needs a reminder: • “Eric walked me right to the door, though it was clearly marked. ‘Well, good luck,’ he said.” • “At least I never needed the map.” • “One girl sat next to me in both Trig and Spanish, and she walked with me to the cafeteria for lunch... We sat at the end of a full table with several of her friends, who she introduced to me.” • Given her overpowering, vampire-like scent, it was very fortunate that the Cullens, “were sitting in the corner of the cafeteria, as far away from where I sat as possible in the long room.” • “One of my new acquaintances, who considerately reminded me that her name was Angela, had Biology II with me the next hour. We walked to class together in silence. She was shy, too.”

• “Mr. Banner signed my slip and handed me a book with no nonsense about introductions. I could tell we were going to get along. Of course, he had no choice but to send me to the one open seat in the middle of the room.” • “Unfortunately the lecture was on cellular anatomy, something I’d already studied.” • “The phrase if looks could kill suddenly ran through my mind. At that moment, the bell rang loudly.” • Edward is cold and mean to Bella. Yet just as she begins to fear that her eyes will tear up: “’Aren’t you Isabella Swan?’ a male voice asked. I looked up to see a cute, baby-faced boy... smiling at me in a friendly way. He obviously didn’t think I smelled bad.” • “‘Do you need any help finding your next class?’ ‘I’m headed to the gym, actually...’ ‘That’s my next class, too.’” • “It turned out he was in my English class also. He was the nicest person I’d met today.” • “At home, only two years of P.E. were required. Here, P.E. was mandatory all four years. Forks was literally my personal hell on Earth.” Actually, in just a few days, Forks will become more like her “personal heaven on Earth.”

• Given who she is about to run into, and her overwhelming scent, this may be the best luck she has all day: “I walked slowly to the office... The rain had drifted away, but the wind was strong, and colder. I wrapped my arms around myself.” It takes Edward several minutes to even realize who Bella is, since her delicious scent had been blown away by the wind. So even with all of her “good luck,” does Bella feel lucky? Happy? Pleased? Excited about her future? Ready to accept that even when you don’t know what’s coming, things could actually go really well? “How did your first day go, dear?” the receptionist asked maternally. “Fine,” I lied, my voice weak. She didn’t look convinced. When I got to the truck, it was almost the last car in the lot... the closest thing to home I had in this damp green hole. I sat inside for a while, just staring out the windshield blankly... But soon I was cold... I headed back to Charlie’s house, fighting tears the whole way there.

How Bella feels about things doesn’t have much to do with her day. It has to do with her labels: She is unlucky. So Cause and Effect don’t really matter, or exist at all. Even though Bella had no trouble finding her school. She has no trouble finding her classes. Her classmates helped her. She was already registered. Thanks to Charlie.

She is ahead of her classmates in every subject. Her previous studies are paying off. Everyone seems to be friendly to her. Bella is approachable. Humble. Kind. The only person who isn’t friendly is the cutest billionaire vampire in the entire school. And he doesn’t kill her. Luckily. So, because of those causes, the effect is that Bella actually has a very “lucky” day. But she expected bad luck, so that is how her day seemed to go. At least to her. And that is the only truly unfortunate thing that happened all day. (Except for having to take Gym; I’ll give her that one.) Readers shouldn’t be too hard on Bella, though. First, she is more than hard enough on herself. Second, many people approach life the same way. Third, most heroes start off the same way, too (what a coincidence!). To become the hero of their story, they need to go from “not knowing” to knowing. So, what do they need to know? Cause and Effect. This principle, this idea, means that every cause has effects. And every effect has causes. Trace the effects to their causes, correctly, and you can control every cause in your life. You can control your future. You can control your entire world. You can become the hero.

Which is a good thing, because the world needs more heroes. Happily, the principle of Cause and Effect works in the real world. That is why it’s always so important in the stories we read, watch, or hear. At least, in the stories we enjoy most. It doesn’t matter if the hero seeks to find a pile of gold. Or to free their people. Or to destroy the Death Star. Or to save their beloved Edward and Renesmee. What they find, along with those other things, is Cause and Effect. That’s their real treasure. And, a major way they discover Cause and Effect is by noticing patterns.

3. Patterns The next day was betterâ&#x20AC;Ś and worse. As the future hero of her story, Bella soon begins to notice different patterns. These patterns (eventually) reveal the Causes and Effects in her life. The patterns themselves arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t necessarily good or bad; they just show how (and that) Bella is figuring things out. What follows is a chart of some of Bellaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s narrative, describing what she notices about her surroundings -- on the left. On the right are some brief comments about the patterns she sees. There are others. Feel free to add your own notes to the chart yourself, or at the end of the book. Recognizing valid patterns is essential to real learning.

Seeing patterns helps.

It was easier because I knew what to expect of my day... I began to feel like I was treading water, instead of drowning in it.

First, a relief. Her classmates have noticed patterns about Bella, and know what to expect. Pattern: Bella is now part of Mike and Jessica’s social group. Of course, Eric sits in as well.

People didn’t look at me quite as much as they had yesterday.

I sat with a big group at lunch that included Mike, Eric, Jessica, and several other people whose names and faces I now remembered.

Bella has mixed feelings for Edward. Strong feelings. Also, a pattern of strong reactions to her from Edward, is also already established.

And it was worse because Edward Cullen wasn’t in school at all... All morning I was dreading lunch, fearing his bizarre glares. Part of me wanted to confront him and demand to know what his problem was. While I was lying sleepless in my bed, I even imagined what I would say.

I saw that his four siblings of sorts were sitting together at the same table, and he was not with them...

Two patterns. First, where people sit in the lunchroom. Second, Edward is gone.

I was terribly uncomfortable, waiting nervously for the moment he would arrive... He didn’t come, and as time passed I grew more and more tense...

Bella is growing more tense. A trending pattern.

I held my breath at the door, but Edward Cullen wasn’t there, either...

With Bella holding her breath, and scanning for vampires, a new pattern is revealed: Bella is acting increasingly like a vampire. Also: “Either.” Another pattern. Edward really is gone.

I was relieved that I had the desk to myself, that Edward was absent. I told myself that repeatedly.

Pattern: “Repeatedly.” Plus, a new pattern unfolds. Bella is “falling” for Edward. She “falls” in more ways than one. Which is another pattern.

Mike, who was taking on the qualities of a golden retriever, walked faithfully by my side to class. I held my breath at the door, but Edward Cullen wasn’t there, either. I exhaled and went to my seat. Mike followed, talking about an upcoming trip to the beach. He lingered by my desk till the bell rang. Then he smiled at me wistfully and went to sit by a girl with braces and a bad perm. It looked like I was going to have to do something about Mike.

Mike is following his own pattern. Since Bella has identified that pattern, she can predict his future behavior, giving her the power to control the Causes (and thus, Effects) in her life. Which is why she will have to do “something” about him. She needs to break that pattern.

Last night I’d discovered that Charlie couldn’t cook much besides fried eggs and bacon.

Charlie can’t cook. One assumes that a pattern of meals of eggs and bacon led to her discovery.

Do “looks and money” always go together?

I saw the two Cullens and the Hale twins getting into their car. It was the shiny new Volvo. Of course... With their remarkable good looks, the style with which they carried themselves, they could have worn dishrags and pulled it off.

Apparently, that seemed to be how things went in Phoenix. At least to Bella. But she can sometimes be an unreliable narrator. Are people unreliable narrators of their own life’s story?

It seemed excessive for them to have both looks and money. But as far as I could tell, life worked that way most of the time. It didn’t look as if it bought them any acceptance here.

Yesterday, Bella noticed that the Cullens broke the patterns others followed: “They didn’t look anything alike... And yet, they were all exactly alike. Every one of them was chalky pale... They all had very dark eyes... They also had dark shadows under those eyes... all their features, were straight, perfect, angular... I stared because their faces, so different, so similar, were all devastatingly, inhumanly beautiful... They were all looking away from each other, away from the other students, away from anything in particular as far as I could tell.”

No, I didn’t fully believe that. The isolation must be their desire; I couldn’t imagine any door that wouldn’t be opened by that degree of beauty.

It was nice to be inside the supermarket; it felt normal. I did the shopping at home, and I fell into the pattern of the familiar task gladly. The store was big enough inside that I couldn’t hear the tapping of the rain on the roof to remind me where I was.

Bella is happy while shopping. For the only time. Why?

Before starting my homework, I changed into a pair of dry sweats, pulled my damp hair up into a pony-tail, and checked my e-mail for the first time. I had three messages...

From this point, there are more patterns. But they aren’t spelled out quite so clearly. They make for harder challenges of our pattern finding skills.

Because the “familiar task” is part of a “pattern” of her old life. At this point, Bella dislikes the repetitive sound of rain falling. It is strange for her. The sound reminds her of a broken pattern -- that she is no longer in Phoenix.

First is the pattern of Renee’s emails. She is becoming upset. Bella has no trouble foreseeing that pattern.

My mom was well known for jumping the gun.

Next is Renee’s pattern of “jumping the gun.”

Everything is great. Of course it’s raining. I was waiting for something to write about.

Patterns of “everything” going “great.” Plus, the Forks raining pattern.

School isn’t bad, just a little repetitive.

School is “repetitive.”

I met some nice kids who sit by me at lunch.

Nice kids continue to sit with her at lunch.

Your blouse is at the dry cleaners - you were supposed to pick it up Friday...

Renee forgot about her dry cleaning (presumably), again.

I miss you, too. I’ll write again soon, but I’m not going to check my e-mail every five minutes.

With this part, how many problems/patterns does Bella prevent? Changing patterns will be a new pattern for Bella herself. It is what will eventually lead her into becoming a hero.

Relax, breathe. I love you. Bella.

Needing to be reminded to breathe is probably not a good sign. But of course, Bella follows that same pattern.

I had decided to read Wuthering Heights -- the novel we were currently studying in English -yet again for the fun of it.

“Yet again for the fun of it.” A revealing pattern about Bella.

He hung up his gun belt... As far as I was aware, he’d never shot the gun on the job [1]. But he kept it ready [2]. When I came here as a child, he would always remove the bullets as soon as he walked in the door [3]. I guess he considered me old enough now [4] not to shoot myself by accident, and not depressed enough to shoot myself on purpose [5].

Here are several, subtle patterns -- and some broken ones, as well (numbered).

“What’s for dinner?” he asked warily. My mother was an imaginative cook, and her experiments weren’t always edible. I was surprised, and sad, that he seemed to remember that far back...

Old patterns emerge from the (former) Swan household.

He seemed to feel awkward... [and watched] TV while I worked. We were both more comfortable that way... “Smells good, Bell...” We ate in silence for a few minutes. It wasn’t uncomfortable. Neither of us was bothered by the quiet. In some ways, we were well suited for living together.

While new patterns are already being established: Bella handles the kitchen, Charlie handles the TV.

“You should see the doctor,” Charlie said, laughing...

The Cullens’ pattern -- of breaking patterns -- appears. Again.

He went back to the TV, and after I finished washing the dishes by hand -- no dishwasher -- I went upstairs unwillingly to work on my math homework. I could feel a tradition in the making.

Traditions are patterns, too, which may be helpful or harmful. More on that later.

Bella is a good cook, and was comfortable doing so. They were comfortable around each other as well.

More patterns arise over the next few days. There is the routine of Bella’s classes. In Gym, the other students notice a pattern, themselves, and learn to cover for her. She watches for Edward every day. He remains absent. They say, “absence makes the heart grow fonder.” Is that a true pattern for Bella? Or for her, is it more like pain? Is she actually breaking that pattern? And so on, throughout Twilight and the entire Saga. Bella notices many patterns, over and over again, in a pattern of it’s own. Why are they so important? Remember that Bella -- like all heroes -- needs to grasp Cause and Effect to control her destiny, to get what she wants -- what will be best, for her and others she loves. Cause and Effect is a pattern. Lots of patterns, really. And noticing those patterns is the key to open that door of understanding. And to understand life. Patterns can be difficult to spot in life. They can be subtle -- almost guesses, really, about things we don’t fully understand. And yet, those guesses may be true. Sometimes people recognize patterns when they aren’t thinking about the issue at all. Breakthroughs like that may be called, “hallway moments,” because they often happen at times when our minds are blank. Like walking in a hallway. Between where we were, and where we are going. Doing nothing other than walking.

Thinking of nothing, really. And... Boom. A realization hits. We may consider it carefully right then, accept it, and live accordingly. But if we don’t, for whatever reason, and it keeps coming up, eventually, we will probably need to consider it. Like Bella does here: I couldn’t get rid of the nagging suspicion that I was the reason he wasn’t there. It was ridiculous, and egotistical, to think that I could affect anyone that strongly. It was impossible. And yet I couldn’t stop worrying that it was true. Hey, Bella! It’s true! Sometimes, good news is hard to accept. Simply because it is so good. But. Just because something is good, doesn’t mean that it can’t be true. Including the principle of Cause and Effect.

4. Self-Fulfilling Prophecy Bella trips a lot. Falls a lot. And she worries that perhaps her recent growth spurt -- the one that probably has left her a little clumsy -- will mean that she will continue literally stumbling through life. In every way. But that doesn’t seem like a true pattern. Life isn’t really like that. Or, it doesn’t have to be. Nobody is perfect (even Edward). And just because a person struggles at something, doesn’t mean they are bad. Struggling is a good thing. It means you’re trying. And if something seems especially trying, if other people are going through life, facing similar circumstances, and aren’t facing the same challenges, or responding to them in the same way... Then those trials probably have as much or

more to do with you, than they do with life itself. Which means that our perception of life may have much more to do with us, than it does with “life.” Which leads to a pressing question: What is life really like? It took every ounce of my concentration to make it down the icy brick driveway alive. I almost lost my balance when I finally got to the truck, but I managed to cling to the side mirror and save myself. Clearly, today was going to be nightmarish... My truck seemed to have no problem with the black ice that covered the roads. I drove very slowly, though, not wanting to carve a path of destruction through Main Street. When I got out of my truck at school, I saw why I’d had so little trouble. Something silver caught my eye, and I walked to the back of the truck -- carefully holding the side for support -- to examine my tires. There were thin chains crisscrossed in diamond shapes around them. Charlie had gotten up who knows how early to put snow chains on my truck. My throat suddenly felt tight. I wasn’t used to being taken care of, and Charlie’s unspoken concern caught me by surprise. I was standing by the back corner of the truck, struggling to fight back the sudden wave of emotion the snow chains had brought on, when I heard an odd sound. It was a high-pitched screech, and it was fast becoming painfully loud. I looked up, startled.

Perhaps, at least sometimes, life is like traveling on ice. Roads can get you wherever you want to go. Of course, you could also get in a car wreck on them, or even slip off the road entirely after driving over a patch of invisible, black ice. Yet, Bella makes it to school surprisingly easy. She walks carefully. She drives carefully. Plus, Charlie considerately put snow chains on her truck. So she made it to school just fine.

In contrast, Tyler was nowhere near as careful. So is the message, “Please drive carefully?” Not exactly. Even though it’s a good idea. The real issue has to do with what Edward calls “self-fulfilling prophecy,” later, in Eclipse and also Breaking Dawn. “Then what’s wrong?” “Self-fulfilling prophecy, I think. We keep waiting for Alice to see something so we can go... and she doesn’t see anything because we won’t really go until she does. So she can’t see us there. “What’s the matter with him, then?” “He’s upset with himself, not you, Bella. He’s worrying about… self-fulfilling prophecy, I suppose you could say.” “How so?” Carlisle asked before I could. “He’s wondering if the newborn madness is really as difficult as we’ve always thought, or if, with the right focus and attitude, anyone could do as well as Bella. Even now -- perhaps he only has such difficulty because he believes it’s natural and unavoidable. Maybe if he expected more of himself, he would rise to those expectations. You’re making him question a lot of deep-rooted assumptions, Bella.”

Some say that life really is just a random jumble of hardship and pain. And not just anyone. Philosopher Thomas Hobbes said life is, “solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short.” Shakespeare’s Macbeth says, “Life’s but a walking shadow... Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.” And the ever-popular, well-known bumper sticker proclaims, Life sucks. And then you die.” However poetic (or not) these observations are, none of them are actually very

helpful. They are, in fact, quite the contrary. When people refer to those sentiments, often, what they are really saying is that, even though their life has gone poorly, it couldn’t possibly have anything to do with them; it’s simply the way life is. And they claim this despite the fact that other people, often in similar or worse circumstances, are doing quite well. The biggest problem with viewing life as chaotic and unhappy is that life itself can become a “self-fulfilling prophesy.” If a person thinks they are stuck with things they hate because “that’s just the way things are,” then they won’t try to figure out how to change it for the better. So they won’t change things for the better. And so it doesn’t get any better. They have all the proof they ever want that life is horrific, or dull, or disappointing, or whatever, because their lives are. On the other hand, if you view your life as something you can change -- that you have control over, at least to choose your own response to whatever other people are doing -then you will likely end up changing your life for the better. Simply because you believe that something “better” is an actual possibility. Like Bella driving carefully. Because she believes she can drive carefully, and thus, safely. And so she does. Cause and Effect: Every hero’s best friend. Of course, Cause and Effect works the other way, too. Villains are not so excited about Cause and Effect. Because then, when their lives go badly, it must be their own fault.

And for the people who aren’t sure whether they are a hero, villain, or just trying to get by, Cause and Effect can help or hurt them. Or in other words, it can be a lot like like driving on ice; the principle of Cause and Effect makes it so every action not only has an equal and opposite reaction, but often seems to have an exaggerated one. Take Edward, for instance. He acts like an angel, even watching over Bella by night, and yet he fears that he may really be the villain -- a monster -- after all. What is the Effect of Edward’s fears? Judging from Edward’s oh-so-casual changes of subject (read: terrible anxiety) every time Alice comes up, Alice has foreseen Bella’s eventual fate: Vampire. Edward may think that if he bites Bella on accident (and is able to leave her alive), making her into a vampire, she would hate him forever for the pain he caused her. Especially because it is hard for vampires to change. Or, if Edward changes Bella into a vampire on purpose, she may hate him forever for the same reasons. And being an immortal vampire himself, who is more or less permanently “imprinted” on Bella, that could mean a very painful eternity for him. Hellish, in fact. Which would seem like something to be expected, since as he sees things, he is a damned, demonic monster already. And it would be hellish for Bella, too, living forever in hatred of what he has done to her, endlessly wanting revenge. On the other hand, Edward reasons, if he changes Bella, and she doesn’t automatically hate him, she soon will.

Because she won’t be able to have children. Over time, he fears, this loss would hurt her, as it has Esme and Rosalie -- who already claims she would give up all she has in a heartbeat (including Emmett) just to be mortal again. So there it is. Entirely logical. And incredibly painful future, no matter what. Therefore, Bella cannot become a vampire, end of discussion. Or so he thinks. Just because something is “logical,” doesn’t mean that it actually makes any sense. Because it’s difficult to logically consider every possible outcome. Just as Edward has failed to do. Sometimes the problem isn’t “not knowing,” as much as it is thinking you know, when you really don’t. Edward doesn’t seem to consider the possibility that maybe -- just maybe -- Bella truly loves him, and really does want to join him through all eternity. And that’s all. Where, actually, they could continue in love and joy, together, forever. And in case he hasn’t noticed yet, Bella is, like, a total stud. She doesn’t panic at the risk of pain. Indeed, she rarely considers it, when a worth goal is in sight. Which is a sign of courage. Of being strong. Of being a true hero. It is her life. Which means this is her story. Which means that she must become the hero, after all. Edward, meanwhile, needs to check the clock.

5. Time vs. Eternity Here in the trees it was much easier to believe the absurdities that embarrassed me indoors. Nothing had changed in this forest for thousands of years, and all the myths and legends of a hundred different lands seemed much more likely in this green haze than they had in my clear-cut bedroom.

The Twilight Saga is very concerned with the relationships between time and eternity. Or, perhaps, time versus eternity. Whenever she returns to Forks, Bella finds it hard to follow the time, and whenever she leaves, the harsh, quickly moving Sun seems to foreshadow her approaching doom. Forks seems to exist outside normal time. It’s overcast skies make it difficult to tell the passage of time from the Sun. Except at twilight or breaking dawn (or perhaps during a new moon or an eclipse), which are “times” of noticeable change, Forks seems to have two “times:” day and night.

Further, in Forks, ancient events affect the present, as though they happened just yesterday. The future is foreseen. Nature itself seems ancient, unchanging, immortal. And so immortal beings, including vampires and shape shifting werewolves, are either created here, or drawn to the area -- like Bella, whose immortal destiny awaits. But in the meantime, she brings change to Forks, and the entire immortal world. Since immortals are “frozen,” they don’t expect to change. Edward, in particular, seems to take that to another level, into the common notion of “doom:” That something bad will happen. Everything will be ruined. Fade to black. The end. And that’s how things will remain -- doomed -- forever. Humans aren’t frozen. They change. Continually, really, for better or worse. And through it all, they may become wiser as a result. Similarly, Bella keeps changing throughout Twilight, and the entire saga. So even though Bella’s immortal side begins to come out, the immortal, “mythic time” itself doesn’t stop. It keeps going, at least for her. She keeps becoming wiser -and more vampiric -- all the time. The word “eternity” doesn’t just mean, “tick tock tick tock...” in a linear fashion for a very, very long time. Like the eternal symbol of a wedding band, it goes around and around. It is a circle, which cycles forever. There is no start, and there is no end. Eternity doesn’t start, or stop, either. It just is.

What Bella introduces to the immortal Forks is the concept that eternal “be-ing” should include change, because then eternity can include eternal growth. For mortals, or immortals. So, in Forks, Bella learns that time is more important than she’d thought. And it seems that the many authors of the entire shelf of self-help books on time management at any given bookstore would agree. Many say that people should live “in the now,” focusing on the short-term. Other books say that people need to focus primarily on long-term results. Both are right. So both are wrong. Which suggests that the issue of time itself is larger than the two options of shortterm versus long-term. And when a question cannot yield a right answer, often the question itself is what’s wrong. Later, we’ll notice that the Wolfpack seems to be entirely focused on the short-term. They are very focused on current events. Patrol, attack, eat, sleep. Patrol, attack, eat, sleep. React, react, react. That’s about it. Meanwhile, nearly everything else in their lives falls apart. As for the future... Well, they’ll figure that out later. And by “later,” they essentially mean, “never.” Another time-distortion thing. Not helping. In contrast, Edward thinks long-term, but that doesn’t help him very much, either. In Edward’s mind, “long-term” simply means that eventually, every good thing will be ruined. He is aware of many principles, but unfortunately, the main “principle” on Edward’s mind is his fear that all

things -- eventually -- “end badly.” Like his parents dying. Like him dying. Like Rosalie messing up his new family. Like Bella resenting him someday. Everything ruined. No matter what. Also not helping. The main issue is that “before and after” is not the same thing as Cause and Effect. To tell the difference, people (like Edward and the Wolfpack) need to understand both current events and eternal principles, short-term and long-term. For example, look at Alice. She foresees the future. The very definition of the “after.” But she still actually lives here, in the now, the “before.” So, does her seeing the future -- the long-term -- solve all of her problems? Her family’s problems? Hardly. Because ”before and after” are not the same things as Cause and Effect. Often, her foreknowledge just makes things more difficult. And knowing only the “after” because of the “before” won’t help if you don’t understand the reasons why. For both the before and after. Distinctions about short- versus long-term thinking are misleading. They may be interesting, and sometimes even enlightening, but in the end, they are not indicative of either character or ability. Like a poorly-written job description, being either “detailoriented” or a “big-picture thinker,” really won’t get a person very far. Because, to succeed at life, they will need both. One of the things that happens when heroes start noticing patterns around them, is that they don’t just lie there,

anymore, feeling doomed (something to remember for New Moon). At least, they don’t anymore. Instead, they notice when the patterns are broken and respond. Looking around, one can see broken patterns everywhere: weather, business returns, cultural norms, employment processes, social contracts... the list goes on. It’s true that broken patterns present challenges to those who find themselves caught unawares. People follow certain steps in life and they expect a certain result. But sometimes things don’t go the ways they expect. So why don’t the patterns always work? Why do patterns break? Because life isn’t based on patterns. Life is based on principles. Principles which can be hard to identify. Yet from principles come patterns. And when the patterns break, the underlying principles are revealed. So broken patterns are a gift, at least to the observant. Luckily, our hero Bella is very observant. And, in case anyone hasn’t noticed, she is really, really good at breaking patterns. Look at the Swan family. Renee likes to break patterns, too. She likes change. There was a pattern -- marriage -- which was meant to continue. Renee broke that pattern by divorcing Charlie, apparently because she didn’t like the town they lived in. Most people, when faced with that feeling, move. So, really, what she may have been escaping is the responsibilities of marriage.

But she could not escape the responsibilities of motherhood. Renee likes to think of herself as “young.” Perhaps she thinks of being “young” as meaning “allowed to be irresponsible.” So, if she pretends she’s younger than she is, can she act irresponsibly? She... could. But no matter how young or old a person is, they cannot escape the Effects of what they Cause. Because they caused it. Renee can act as irresponsibly as she wants -- forgetting things, getting lost, charging into things she hasn’t considered, backing out of them all-too-soon, not shopping, not cooking, not cleaning, and so forth. But it doesn’t mean that she should. For a long time now, Bella has picked up the slack. So when Phil showed up, Bella saw an opportunity and left, like her mother once did. Now, Renee can no longer live in the (fictional) past. Renee will have to think about the future. And she’s making progress, thanks in no small part to Bella. Charlie also lives in the past, but with a different take on things. Living with all those immortals in Forks, his life is basically frozen. Unchanging. His house is the same since the day Renee walked out the door, yelling that she “really, really hates” the seemingly unchanging atmosphere of Forks. But Charlie is willing to take on responsibilities -- for his town as police chief, and for Bella. So Bella works with Charlie, until he is actually pretty

flexible, and able to handle major changes in his life. Shocking ones, in fact, yet to come. Again, thanks to Bella. So, back to Edward’s fears of things ending badly. People running from fears of eternal “doom” fail to consider the exceedingly helpful question: “And then what?” As in: So, Edward, let’s say that Bella hates you because you changed her into a vampire, even though she asked you to for years. And then what? She’ll be in her wild stage, and you, Edward, would protect her and guide her. Help her. And win her back. Earn her love, all the more. “And then what?” is a very powerful question for those who fear becoming “doomed.” Here’s what happened to Edward when he -- finally -asked, “And then what?” “Do you remember the day that Mike asked you to the dance?” I nodded, though I remembered that day for a different reason. “The day you started talking to me again.” “I was surprised by the flare of resentment, almost fury, that I felt -- I didn’t recognize what it was at first. I was even more aggravated than usual that I couldn’t know what you were thinking, why you refused him. Was it simply for your friend’s sake? Was there someone else? I knew I had no right to care either way. I tried not to care. “And then the line started forming,” he chuckled. I scowled in the darkness. “I waited, unreasonably anxious to hear what you would say to them, to watch your expressions. I couldn’t deny the relief I felt, watching the annoyance on your face. But I couldn’t be sure. “That was the first night I came here. I

wrestled all night, while watching you sleep, with the chasm between what I knew was right, moral, ethical, and what I wanted. I knew that if I continued to ignore you as I should, or if I left for a few years, till you were gone, that someday you would say yes to Mike, or someone like him. It made me angry. “And then,” he whispered, “as you were sleeping, you said my name. You spoke so clearly, at first I thought you’d woken. But you rolled over restlessly and mumbled my name once more, and sighed. The feeling that coursed through me then was unnerving, staggering. And I knew I couldn’t ignore you any longer.”

So Edward was grappling with facing the difficulties presented by his love for Bella -- prompted by his realization that someday she would love another. Time to re-prioritize his life. By finally asking, “and then what?” it led him past his fears of doom -- that time would somehow stop at his lowest point forever -- into realizing, and accepting, other possibilities (including, that Bella loved him). Because time doesn’t work that way. It doesn’t just stop at the worst point and stay there. Forever. There is always more. “And then,” once he asked himself that question, Bella said his name, sighed, and fell back to sleep. A good thing that he’d looked beyond the self-fulfilling prophecy of his “doom.” Meanwhile, what was Bella doing that same evening? While Edward struggled with his overpowering love for her? My head was spinning, trying to analyze every word Edward had spoken today. What did he mean, it was better if we weren’t friends?

My stomach twisted as I realized what he must have meant. He must see how absorbed I was by him; he must not want to lead me on… so we couldn’t even be friends… because he wasn’t interested in me at all. Of course he wasn’t interested in me, I thought angrily, my eyes stinging — a delayed reaction to the onions. I wasn’t interesting. And he was. Interesting… and brilliant… and mysterious… and perfect… and beautiful… and possibly able to lift full-sized vans with one hand. Well, that was fine. I could leave him alone. I would leave him alone. I would get through my self-imposed sentence here in purgatory, and then hopefully some school in the Southwest, or possibly Hawaii, would offer me a scholarship.

There’s nothing wrong with going to college in Hawaii. But that’s not the real issue here. Bella assumes she is doomed, reaching progressively worse conclusions about Edward, deluding herself about the onions (lol), and falling into despair... While Edward is coming unglued over his love for her. That very night he steals into her room, for the first time, taking on his role as Bella’s guardian angel. Because of Cause and Effect, there is always a “then what.” There is in Twilight as well. For example, the entire epilogue itself. So, among other things, Twilight examines time, and the perception of time. Time though, like age, is relatively irrelevant when compared with what you’ve gone through. There is a saying that some people gain one years’ experience in ten

years, while others gain ten years’ experience in one year. The immortal world of the Twilight Saga is filled with the latter. There are lots of very “old” young people -- throughout the Saga -- who have been through a lot. Who have thought about their experiences a lot. In contrast, adults and authority figures in general often act comparatively foolishly. The younger people do more, act more productively, and solve the most problems. Thus, Bella, one of the youngest of those living within the immortal world of Twilight, does the most, and helps the most. When Bella and Edward first meet, they are both attracted to one another -- not only physically and emotionally, but also spiritually, if you will. They are mentally focused on one another, and feel increasingly overwhelmed emotionally in regards to one another. Their whole being is keenly aware of the other. Those are the similarities. The differences: Edward panics. He fears Bella, and what changes she could bring, and in distress, flees to Denali, Alaska -- 2,397 miles away. Later, he decides he can treat her as a person of no consequence and, when that fails, ignores her outright, which in some ways, is a harsher response. More extreme. And, often, more final. By comparison, Bella’s fears -- that Edward will never be interested in her because she actually isn’t interesting (or so she fears) -- come out mostly as sadness. Unlike Edward’s rages, she is mostly frustrated. Which is to her credit.

What is not to either of their credit, though, is that they both seem to assume that some permanent”doom” awaits. To be sure, there are things in the world to avoid. Truly harmful things. But nothing is forever in this always-changing world, including “doom.” Especially when they are both there, sitting next to each other, in Biology each day. In love with each other. And both too scared to admit it. For weeks. Scared of doom. Ignoring Cause and Effect. Not progressing. Time passing. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Their dilemma is rather common. Here is why. For far, far too many people (including a few Italian immortals), the only sense of Cause and Effect that they ever consider is something like: “I am awesome. Perfect, really. So my life is perfect, too. Everything I do. Everything I say. Perfectly justified. Perfectly right.” So they can (and do) generally focus their lives on a few things they want to do. It may be anything, really, but it is almost always not one of their real, actual responsibilities. And they basically ignore everything else. Including their real, actual responsibilities. So that is what they do. Time passes. Cause and Effect continues. And as their actual responsibilities fall apart, day by day, gathering consequences, which accumulate and grow. Getting worse and worse. And then reality hits. Hard. The consequences of their

actions (and inaction) befall them. Suddenly, the Effects cannot be ignored any longer. How will they respond? There are generally two responses. The first is to humbly accept that they have made some mistakes in taking care of their responsibilities, try to remedy things, and ensure it doesn’t happen again. Which takes humility -- an understanding that they themselves, and their concerns, are not necessarily as important as others’. It is an unfortunately rare quality. Which makes this an unfortunately rare response. A second response is far more common. “Hey, I am awesome, remember?! If something is wrong here, it certainly isn’t perfect me or my perfect life. It must be the world/life/all-those-jerks that made the mistake. Not me.” There is a variation on this response. It sounds like this: “What? I am a good person! Why did this bad thing happen to me? How could it? It must be this terrible, horrible world I live in!” And there is a more pious, yet basically the same, version: “Life is hard. It builds character. God wants it this way.” Which doesn’t seem too terrible since difficulty isn’t necessarily something to shy away from. Until it takes this turn, as it often does: “So don’t try to improve anything in your life. Just suffer it well. Endure it quietly.” In any case, the second responses aren’t very helpful.

Because of Cause and Effect, a person can’t really avoid the consequences of their actions. But these second-response people often want things they haven’t earned -- effects they haven’t caused. Life doesn’t work that way. At least, not for long, no matter how it seems. So the irresponsible people blame their resulting problems in their own lives on anyone but themselves: life, the universe, everyone else, all those jerks out there, or you. Their problems are someone else’s fault. Which is not to say that problems don’t arise from other people; they can, and do. But fault often doesn’t matter. Responsibility does. If it’s “your” life, then “you” are responsible. Get away. Stop dealing with them. Figure out a work-around. Put a stop to it. Get help. Do something. Just take responsibility. Neither Edward or Bella seem much like the secondresponse people. But they have, no doubt, been around such people their whole lives. And so, they have ended up hearing that “life is terrible” excuse for a long time. Eventually, they may start repeating that excuse themselves. Most people do. And if they hear it long enough, they may actually believe it. Especially if they have never heard anything to the contrary. But when they say “life is at fault,” they won’t be using it as an excuse. They will be afraid. Deathly afraid. “Doomed,” in fact.

And so although both Edward (some of the time) and Bella (all of the time) are humble, in the best sense, as well as responsible, alert, and willing to amend any mistakes theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve made, trying to do better in the future... they are also often afraid. Meanwhile, as time keeps ticking away, they need to look at their priorities. Re-evaluate them. Focus on what is truly needed and most important. As it happens, Edward is actually pretty good at that. And Bella is extraordinary. They recognize what is important, and are willing to sacrifice to reach it. And in that, they will find their way past fear itself. More on that later.

6. Bella vs. Edward “And your mother sent you here so that she could travel with him.” He said it as an assumption again, not a question. My chin raised a fraction. “No, she did not send me here. I sent myself.” His eyebrows knit together. “I don’t understand,” he admitted, and he seemed unnecessarily frustrated by that fact. I sighed. Why was I explaining this to him? He continued to stare at me with obvious curiosity. “She stayed with me at first, but she missed him. It made her unhappy… so I decided it was time to spend some quality time with Charlie.” My voice was glum by the time I finished. “But now you’re unhappy,” he pointed out. “And?” I challenged. “That doesn’t seem fair.” He shrugged, but his eyes were still intense. I laughed without humor. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you? Life isn’t fair.” “I believe I have heard that somewhere before,” he agreed dryly. “So that’s all,” I insisted, wondering why he was still staring at me that way.

His gaze became appraising. “You put on a good show,” he said slowly. “But I’d be willing to bet that you’re suffering more than you let anyone see.”

At this point in her life, at the start of Twilight, Bella’s Worldview is that pain is always around the corner. Edward sees this quickly and clearly, telling her -- in their first real conversation -- that he can see she is “suffering more than you let anyone see.” Living with pain? And hiding it? Edward understands. Because he is doing the same thing. So they agree, for the first time, on this issue of Worldview. “Life isn’t fair,” Bella says. And Edward dryly, and immediately, agrees. It is basically their one sure thing in a world of uncertainty. But is it true? They are both wholeheartedly altruistic and thoughtful. The basics of a great relationship often include being closely aligned in terms of being thoughtful in life, which is a pretty big deal. And, great relationships also often include being aligned in terms of selfishness versus altruism, which they also are. Yet, despite Bella and Edward’s very high levels of thoughtfulness and altruism -- both of which lead to high levels of satisfaction and joy in life -- they are convinced that “life isn’t fair.” Their good and kind actions haven’t led them to happiness. Yet.

And that “yet” is the problem. After all, their experiences have led them to one another. A life together. Forever. They just don’t see that yet. Cause and Effect is still at play. The effects of all the kindness, devotion, and altruism that they have learned and shown, by caring for their families, is still on it’s way. Their caring will yet have the consequence to marry someone who is really good at helping others, because they themselves are really good at helping others, too. And then, they will be devoted to one another, to helping one another. And they will be very, very, very happy. But for now, as Edward will often say -- at least in the start of their eternity together -- “You don’t see yourself very clearly, you know.” So the whole “life isn’t fair” thing isn’t very accurate. It’s just short-sighted. Long-term, things equal out much more fairly than some are willing to admit. And, the people whose lives aren’t going so well can be quite determined to spread their generally hopeless Worldviews. Spreading hopelessness can be a common cultural belief. Among humans and vampires. Because most seem unwilling to think: “Hmm... Perhaps I am the one who is wrong here.” Most of our problems may not actually be our own fault. But they are our responsibility. Because it is our life. No one else’s. And if something needs changing, then we need to be the one to change it. Bella and Edward have a lot of changing to do. Bella is still quite young. And Edward has been 17 for “a while.”

So, at the start, Bella and Edward have very different situations in life. Born 100 years apart. Vampire and human. Big family and small. Billionaires and relatively poor. Boy and girl. “Life sucks. And then, you die.” Or: “Life sucks. Plus, you never die.” Bella (and Edward) still have quite a ways to go until they see themselves clearly enough to be able to say that they have the strength to make their lives go happily. They will need a different Worldview.

7. Worldviews “I hate to burst your bubble, but you’re really not as scary as you think you are. I don’t find you scary at all, actually,” I lied casually. He stopped, raising his eyebrows in blatant disbelief. Then he flashed a wide, wicked smile. “You really shouldn’t have said that,” he chuckled... He growled, a low sound in the back of his throat; his lips curled back over his perfect teeth. His body shifted suddenly, half-crouched, tensed like a lion about to pounce. I backed away from him, glaring. “You wouldn’t.” I didn’t see him leap at me -- it was much too fast. I only found myself suddenly airborne, and then we crashed onto the sofa, knocking it into the wall. All the while, his arms formed an iron cage of protection around me -- I was barely jostled. But I still was gasping as I tried to right myself. He wasn’t having that. He curled me into a ball against his chest, holding me more securely than iron chains. I glared at him in alarm, but he seemed well in control, his jaw relaxed as he grinned, his eyes bright only with humor.

“You were saying?” he growled playfully. “That you are a very, very terrifying monster,” I said, my sarcasm marred a bit by my breathless voice. “Much better,” he approved.

Every story exists within its own “milieu.” In some, an old Jedi helps a young man learn to use the Force. Or, a roadrunner leads a wily coyote off a cliff. Or, a dog walks into a bar. In another, a young girl meets a young vampire in semi-real Forks, Washington. Within each milieu, certain things can happen, different things are possible. Other things are not. Similarly, every person has their own Worldview. A Worldview is their perspective on life, the universe, and everything. It asserts what is possible. It also describes -- and thereby, limits -- what is not, often through self-fulfilling prophecies. Much of the suspense in Twilight is there because it isn’t clear exactly what kind of milieu Bella is living in. Is this a kid-in-school story? She moves to a new town, a new school, but after a few pages, academic life is left behind. Is this an (semi-)orphans-have-a-hard-life story? Bella’s life is hard, but it actually gets much better after she moves. And she works things out pretty well with Charlie. Is this simply a teen romance? She meets a mysterious and handsome boy, but there is more than just romance going on. Is this a monster-horror story? There are vampires. But where is the horror, while they sweetly talk with one another in the Meadow?

Especially in a first reading, Twilight surprises readers over and over, who keep trying to anticipate what is going to happen next, based on the patterns which came up before. So, until page 375, readers are left to wonder -- who is the villain? Meanwhile, much of the tension of Twilight is created by who the characters are: A teen girl, a ditsy mom, a policechief father, a handicapped father and his son, random kids from the high school -- and some vampires. As they say on “Sesame Street,” one of these things is not like the other. So, is the villain Edward? It must be him, readers are left to think, because he is the only possible bad guy around. (Other than Rosalie. But she seems mostly irritated, not dangerous.) First-time readers figure out that Bella is the hero, even with her (then, highly) unusual first-person view. Which is a remarkable achievement. Not to get too technical, but many experts have believed for, well, centuries that it was impossible to have a successful first-person narration provided by the hero. Simply because they wouldn’t seem heroic enough from within their own minds. College professors cited examples like “Lord Jim,” written by the lauded Joseph Conrad, who actually switches from first- to third-person in the third chapter to ensure that his hero seems suitably heroic. Unfortunately, many “experts” didn’t understand just how clever Meyer was. Which is one of the reasons for this book. For the careful reader, at least, Bella is profoundly heroic. Even though she doesn’t really think so. At least, not until the very end of the entire Twilight Saga.

Is Carlisle the villain? No way. He’s the Stregoni Benefici. But still, it’s like a Scooby-Doo episode: Shaggy & Company only meet, like, three people at the start of each show. One of them must be the villain. So, since there must be a villain, it must be that Edward, somehow, will hurt Bella... which is exactly what Edward is thinking. Remember, Edward sees himself as a monster. An eternallydamned monster. And since, in a sense, “eternal” doesn’t just mean a very long time -- it means always -- then he might already be in one form of hell or another. If so, it’s no wonder Edward refuses to change Bella. He thinks he would be dragging her into “hell” with him! Now, Edward isn’t actually preying on Bella. She can see that clearly. Readers can see it, too. At least, they can after page 375, when the villains finally show up -- which is a brilliant and compelling literary accomplishment. Normally, villains are introduced by page 10; they have to be, or the story will fall apart. But in Twilight, they don’t appear until the baseball game. And yet the story propels the reader forward. Even at the ending of Twilight, in the hospital, why does Edward keep thinking he must be the villain of her story? Because it is part of his Worldview. It’s the reason that he is so depressed. And why he is so doubtful about his future. And why he wants Bella to leave him, even though he really doesn’t.

The funny thing is that, besides this major point, Bella and Edward share similar Worldviews (despite their different backgrounds) in nearly everything else. For example, Bella doesn’t think too highly of herself, either. It can be hard to have much self-esteem when people are young, because first, they haven’t had the time to actually do very much (yet). And second, because they lack the experience to accurately compare themselves with others. Which mostly means that they are comparing themselves with others. Other’s situations are often different than they seem at first. Besides, what other people seem to be doing, often isn’t what they are actually trying to do. These two 17-year-olds, Bella and Edward, share these misconceptions with many young people the world over. The suspense! Twilight offers almost a reversal of a deus ex machina ending, which is an ancient literary term, meaning, “god out of the machine.” In stage production in ancient Greece, sometimes a play would end happily because some Greek god would be lowered on scaffolding (the “machine”) and announce they had just magically made everything better now. It’s not a very satisfying ending because it ignores the real-life principle of Cause and Effect. Twilight is more like diabolus ex machina! A demon out of the machine! This switching of gods and demons isn’t accidental. It is, in a sense, the basis of the entire plot: Is Edward a demon -- as he fears he really is? Or is he as “god-like” as Bella often says he is? They keep these opinions throughout much of the Twilight Saga, bringing readers along with them in order to find out who is right, after all.

Yet, love is founded on complementary Worldviews. In successful marriages -- or really, relationships of any kind -similar and/or complementary Worldviews are important. As mentioned earlier, one key part of a person’s Worldview is how selfish-versus-altruistic they are. Similar Worldviews are so important because a person’s Worldview leads to their “Approaches.” Approaches are the main ways in which people handle what comes up in life. Approaches are based on the principles they have noticed in life (true or not), which have become part of their Worldview. So, a person’s Worldview is how they think of life/the world/everything, and Approaches are how they live with life/the World/everything. Approaches, in turn, lead to specific “Behaviors” -- what people actually do, say, or think in the day-to-day. People don’t act without reason. And the reasons for their Behaviors are based in their Approaches. These actions have “equal and opposite” reactions, so to speak. Behaviors lead to “Consequences.” Consequences are when the principle of Cause and Effect leads to certain effects in their life, whether noticed or unnoticed. People do stuff. And other stuff happens as a result. Sooner or later, people may recognize those patterns. And as they notice, those Consequences affect their Worldview, in turn. Which affects their Approaches.

Which affects their Behaviors. Which affects their Consequences. So there is a cycle, in stories and life, of how people see the world, and the results that happen as a consequence. A cycle that is as easy to understand as A, B, C. And which explains why self-fulfilling prophecies are so common. And dangerous. For example, let’s take Bella, who was taught in many ways by her mother that marriage was a dreadful thing. In the end, she takes that back, and makes it clear that she was speaking just about herself, not Bella. Which is to Renee’s credit. But Bella still had the weight of years of hearing how and why marriage was dreadful. Why did Renee say those things? To scare Bella? Renee seems better than that. So why? Perhaps it was to excuse her own failure at marriage many years before. Renee’s marriage didn’t fail because Renee gave up on her own marriage; it was because marriage itself was flawed! It’s marriage’s fault! Or so she says. In other words, an excuse. It may be sincere. But it’s still being used an excuse. But for Bella, thinking about the “marriage is dreadful” thing wasn’t an excuse for her own behavior decades earlier. It was a fear. Or it became one (Worldview: Marriage = bad). And so Bella was unable to relate to marriage in general. Or see the good that comes from a good and strong marriage (Approach: Avoid marriage).

Which made it very difficult for her to even talk about marriage (Behavior). Which made it very difficult, indeed, to actually get married (Consequences), no matter how much she wanted to be married, at least with Edward. All of that, including months of Edward’s begging, was largely due to Renee’s self-fulfilling prophecy -- which Bella took on herself at some point or another -- to fear marriage as a dreadful thing. And so the “dreadful” marriage meme made marriage into something that filled her with dread -- a self-fulfilling prophecy. At least for her. Worldviews are like that. Which is why figuring out what kind of story one’s own life will be -- and working toward it -- is so important. Is it a horror story? Or a grand adventure? Ultimately, that decision has less to do with life/the world/everything out there, than it does with us, and what we choose our life to become. To better understand Worldviews within the Twilight Saga -- and life -- there is a specific look at the Worldview A-B-C‘s -- the Worldview Cycle in the lives of the characters from the Twilight Saga -- located in the Appendix at the end of this book. It is less a discussion of what the characters did, as in the Official Illustrated Guide, and is more an examination of why.

8. Wisdom Journeys I was consumed by the mystery Edward presented. And more than a little obsessed by Edward himself. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I wasn’t as eager to escape Forks as I should be, as any normal, sane person would be.

Bella wants to see the truth. Not just so she heard it once, but to fully understand it. To own it. To live it. To embody it. To be it. Always, she is seeking it. To possess more of the truth, not only to help answer “a million or two” of her questions, but to have it ready to use whenever she needs it. Not to just have a bunch of facts in her head, nor to just have knowledge in general -- but to gain wisdom. The problem is, she doesn’t seem to know anyone else doing that. Anyone else looking for a real understanding of life. So seeking wisdom be a “stupid” thing to do, right?

What is wisdom, anyway? Wisdom is (partly) knowledge. And knowledge, as they say, is power. We all know lots of things. Some of what we know doesn’t make us stronger. But some of it does. And that’s what we’re talking about. Wisdom is the kind of knowledge that actually does make us stronger. But, it’s more than just that. First, wisdom includes two kinds of knowledge: 1. Knowledge of what’s happening around you at the moment. If you don’t understand what’s really going on, you can’t act as effectively as possible (which is part of the whole “stronger” thing). 2. Knowledge of important principles. We mentioned principles before, like the principles of Cause and Effect. But, now, to be more clear, principles are the reasons for the different patterns of Cause and Effect which show up at different times in life. There may be many principles working within a given situation. There may be only a few key ones. But the principles are always there, Causing the Effects that follow as a result. Further, to give strength, knowledge of these truths must be fully understood and accepted into your mind and your heart -- into your Worldview -- or else it won’t change your ABCs, your Approaches, Behaviors, and Consequences. It has to become internalized, to be a part of you.

So, how does knowledge of principles, and their current context, become wisdom, effecting the here and now? Certainly there are many ways to try to gain knowledge of principles. Memorization. Affirmations. Frequent testing. But perhaps the best way to create wisdom from knowledge is to live it. For example, most epic heroes go on epic Wisdom Journeys, like Lucy Pevensie finding herself in Narnia, Scrooge visiting the past, present, and future, or Hercules traveling to the depths of Hades itself. But Bella lives in the “real” world of Forks, Washington. So she goes on lots of little, not-so-epic Wisdom Journeys. She takes a trip of some kind. Finds new knowledge. Then she returns home, thinking about what that information means for her life. She follows this pattern over and over. On each trip, she learns something new, and returns to where she started as a new, stronger person. In Twilight alone: • Bella goes to Forks, learns about vampires, and later returns back “home” to Phoenix, a changed person. • Bella goes to school, where she gains insights about Edward during the van accident, travelling further to the hospital to learn more (though not as much as she’d like), until Charlie drives her home. • Bella goes to school, talks to Edward at lunch and faints during blood typing, talking to him in the Nurse’s Office, and as he drives her home in the rain.

• Bella goes to La Push, where Jacob tells her about the Cold Ones, and returns. • Bella goes on a dream Wisdom Journey, to La Push, seeing wolf-Jacob, and Edward with the sharpened teeth, returning to her bedroom when she awakens. • Bella walks out into the timeless forest behind her home, considers if Edward really is a vampire, realizes several key issues, and walks home, after fearing her path would be lost after going so far. • Bella goes to Port Angeles, talking to Edward at the Italian restaurant and on the drive home with him. • Bella drives, then hikes, with Edward to the Meadow, talking about... everything, and returns home, with Edward driving this time. • Bella goes from her kitchen, upstairs to her bedroom later that night, talking with Edward for hours, returning downstairs with him, back to the kitchen, the next morning. • Bella goes to the Cullen home, learns about Carlisle and Edward’s past, returning home to confront Billy. • Bella goes to the Clearing, encounters James’ coven and hears Edward’s fears about the tracker, and insists she be allowed to return home. So she does. Otherwise her journey would not have been complete.

• Bella goes to Phoenix, figures out how to outwit vampires, and later returns home to Forks. Bella goes to the Prom, where she confronts Jacob, and Edward explains why he doesn’t want to change her, and... The book ends. In a cliffhanger, at least as far as her wisdom journey is concerned. And that broken pattern is a big part of why the ending of Twilight, concluded in so many other ways, still feels like a cliffhanger. She hadn’t returned home -- to her new home in Forks -- internalizing what she’d learned in Phoenix. Each trip, each Wisdom Journey, leads Bella to learn, to understand, and to transform what she’s learned into wisdom. So, to gain wisdom does a person need to go on a trip? No, of course not. They just need to follow the same pattern.

9. Becoming the Hero Everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Worldview is, in a sense, incomplete. Because there are just so many things to understand. So we mentally place ourselves within a certain milieu, with possibilities and limitations. Many people label themselves, and their worlds, as being a particular type. And thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s it. They never question their own assumptions, and either ignore or fight against anything or anyone that disagrees with them, no matter how incomplete. And then they die. Of old age. Many such people go through life assuming that, because they know how to focus on themselves, they know all that they ever need to know. They think that there is nothing left to be learned, as long as they basically know

how to take care of themselves. However, until we know enough to live with peace and happiness, all the time, there is probably more that we could learn. And that could help our lives be a little better. Or a lot. The obvious conclusion is simply that we all have a lot to learn. “The beginning of wisdom is to admit that you know nothing,” is how the saying goes. It’s a bit of an overstatement. It might be better to say that what we know is not enough. That we (ought to) want to know more. Of course to learn more, you need to accept that you don’t know enough. Eventually, Edward reaches that point. Bella knew it to begin with. Especially when that lovely boy pushed the van out of the way. To save her. She begins asking herself, essentially, the same thing her first-time readers are asking, since her life is the first time for her, too: What kind of story is this? What milieu is she living in? So. What kind of milieu are we living in? • Is it tragedy? Where Cause and Effect (seemingly) don’t exist? Where terrible things come out of nowhere? Where there is nothing we can do about it? Where we are doomed to failure? • Is it irony? Where Cause and Effect have no real impact? No matter how much we know? No matter how hard we work? Where life itself, and everything within it, is basically pointless? Meaningless? Worthless?

• Is it comedy? Where Cause and Effect are irrelevant? Where everything should turn out just great? No matter what we do? Where the best purpose of life is only entertainment, since life is so vapid and silly? • Or is it an adventure? Where Cause and Effect can be the structure of a great and noble life? Where the altruistic can influence millions, or at least, those they care about the most? Where the selfish are their own worst punishment? Where the accomplishments of life, and the wisdom gained from the experience, is the grandest adventure of all? Take your pick. Because life is largely decided by how that simple question is answered. So, like Bella, we can choose. Choose our life. Because what milieu we choose will pretty much be how it actually ends up going. Not that life automatically becomes easy, simply because we merely wanted it to go that way. But it sure helps. Especially when we struggle to get over the different problems we all face. Bella certainly has her own struggles to deal with. She’s young, so there is a lot she doesn’t know. Especially about vampires, werewolves, and immortality in general. And then there’s the fact that even though she’s young, she actually does know quite a lot. And she’s eager to learn more. But a lot of people -- including the high school boys -- don’t

(or won’t) notice just how much she has to offer. So she’s dealing with a number of pretty selfish people. Not that some of those people aren’t quite nice. When it suits them. Like Mike, or Jessica, or even Renee, for that matter. Bella is humble, which is great, but she doesn’t really feel very good about herself, which is not. Some of that feeling might be okay because, you know, she’s a kid, and hasn’t had a chance to do that much (yet). On the other hand, she’s taken care of herself, and her mom, and now Charlie, and she’s doing really well at it. Very well, in fact. And she’s doing almost perfectly in school. She’s bright, observant, and clever. And witty, too. She’s patient, which sometimes helps a great deal. And she’s very kind, which some people don’t seem to value, but that’s the most important thing, because kindness is love put into action, love made real. Which is pretty much the only kind of love that really matters. And yet, she still doesn’t feel very good about herself. So she’s shy and nervous and self-conscious, which makes her clumsy and more self-conscious, which makes her feel even worse. So Edward’s right: Bella doesn’t see herself clearly. Which is a big problem. And which happens to be most people’s big problem. That, and the whole “improving what you see, once you see yourself clearly” thing. So perhaps reading how Bella overcomes her many problems -- and learns to see herself more clearly -- can help us, too, living out here in real life.

All the dreaminess and literary techniques aside, that’s why Twilight is really so popular. Because it’s so meaningful. How does Bella come to see herself clearly? First, she tries to see life itself clearly. And she does that by asking herself two simple questions: 1. Is my Worldview true? 2. What am I going to do about it? This was the wrong place to have come. I should have known, but where else was there to go? ...Here in the trees it was much easier to believe the absurdities that embarrassed me indoors. Nothing had changed in this forest for thousands of years, and all the myths and legends of a hundred different lands seemed much more likely in this green haze... I forced myself to focus on the two most vital questions I had to answer, but I did so unwillingly. First, I had to decide if it was possible that what Jacob had said about the Cullens could be true... Could the Cullens be vampires? Well, they were something. Something outside the possibility of rational justification was taking place in front of my incredulous eyes. Whether it be Jacob’s cold ones or my own superhero theory, Edward Cullen was not... human. He was something more. So then -- maybe. That would have to be my answer for now. And then the most important question of all. What was I going to do if it was true? ...Only two options seemed practical. The first was to take his advice: to be smart, to avoid him as much as possible... I could do nothing different. After all, if he was something... sinister, he’d done nothing to hurt me so far... There was one thing I was sure of, if I was sure of anything... I feared for him.

And I knew in that I had my answer. I didn’t know if there ever was a choice, really. I was already in too deep. Now that I knew -- if I knew -- I could do nothing about my frightening secret. Because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, the magnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him right now. Even if... but I couldn’t think it. Not here, alone in the darkening forest. Not while the rain made it dim as twilight...

Bella wonders if her Worldview -- or at least, a specific part of it -- is true: Are the Cullens vampires? A larger question looms behind that specific one: Is the supernatural possible? Generally, there are four (or five) parts in each of our lives: • • • •

Physical (our bodies); Intellectual (our minds); Social (our relationships with people); and, Spiritual (our relationships with God / life / the universe / everything).

Each area affects the others, mostly through the Emotional, which is not really its own part, but is within every part, unifying them all. So, if you are having significant problems in one part, the rest may eventually get pulled down as well. Some may wonder, “What about all the stuff I own? Or what happens to me? What part of me is that?” And the answer is: None of the above. All that stuff isn’t you. It’s just stuff. Things. Events. All external to who you really are. In our day, place, and time we can find a lot of answers for dealing with the first three. But the fourth, the Spiritual...

Well, that area can be difficult to talk about. To even think about. Because, as Bella says, it can all seem, occasionally, to some, like a bunch of “ridiculous notions.” There are many Spiritual insights in Twilight, but this is not a religious book. But it should be said: It’s still a big part of life, no matter what kinds of things you choose to believe. Sitting in the forest alone, behind Charlie’s house, Bella lists off Edward’s unusual traits and behaviors, and all that has happened to her as an Effect (including surviving the van accident). How did that happen? Is there something supernatural going on here, despite how “ridiculous” that notion may seem? So Bella comes up with two answers, as far as the supernatural goes for her, which is as Spiritual as she gets, at this point: First, there was the realization that she didn’t fully understand what was going on with the Cullens. But there was definitely something going on with them. Was it Jacob’s “Cold Ones?” Her idea about “superheroes?” Of course, it turns out that they were both right, in a way. But for now, Bella decides her best answer at this point is “maybe,” and she will try to learn more. Which is a pretty good decision to make, all things considered. Second, she decides that, even though she doesn’t understand all the details, whoever Edward is, she loves him. Why? Because she does. The “god-like” Edward offers her a lot, in return for her love. But that’s not why she loves him.

Sometimes, love is just like that. Bella and Edward don’t exactly fall in love, as much as they awaken to it, realizing they’ve been in love -- heart and soul -- all along. For them, it’s not just an emotional thing; it has a spiritual feel to it, too. Bella eventually decides that she wants more from life. More than most people are usually satisfied with -- like, a clear view of her immortal future, for example. So she decides that she will have to work harder than others seem to be. And she doesn’t mind that so much. Which is a good thing. Because she and Edward have a lot to overcome in life. As mentioned earlier, they go over the problems they are facing in the Meadow: First, there’s the fact that Edward is “the world’s best predator.” A very inviting predator. Which poses some practical issues to overcome. Second, there is the fear that the whole, but-he’s-a-vampire thing gives her (especially since intellectually, she doesn’t know much about vampires). And -- more importantly -- are the fears the whole vampire thing gives him. Which is another problem. Along with Edward’s frustration over not reading Bella’s mind, which is also a problem. For him, anyway. And there is the fact he not only craves being near her, socially. There is also her blood. Especially her blood. And he also craves her body, physically. Another problem. Especially because Bella feels much the same about his.

So, how their problems will go depends on the Worldviews they have developed over the years. Edward’s years of abstinence, physically -- in terms of his “diet” and, uh, other appetites -- will be needed to overcome the circumstances he now faces. And Bella’s sympathy and care -- which was developed helping Renee, who is loving but not particularly reciprocal in that love -- will be put to the test through her love for the “god-like” Edward. Like another god-like character with feline characteristics in fiction -- Aslan of Narnia -- Edward is not entirely a “tame lion.” So the test for them both will be whether their Worldviews are right. True. Actually helpful, or merely misleading. Whether they are based on wisdom. Or not.

10. Keys Heroes face lots of tests. Usually, three main ones, at least; one for each act of the story of their lives, with sometimes a fourth, culminating challenge. So, Bella and Edward do, too: The Van. Port Angeles. The Meadow. And James. Will Bella find the wisdom she needs to overcome her four great tests? Will Edward? To gain wisdom, they will need to go through the Wisdom Cycle. There are several keys to enter that cycle, which prepare us/heroes/Bella-and-Edward to gain, accept, and use that wisdom we need so badly to overcome the world. These keys also work as mini-tests, to help assess the character of other people. Especially people you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know well. Or know too well to see very clearly. Judging character is difficult for many, as people may have qualities that you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t

see, yet these mini-tests may be a help in doing so, regardless. The keys to enter the Wisdom Cycle include: • Humility: Not being arrogant. Admitting when you do something wrong, or that you just don’t understand all that’s going on. Mini-test: Do they assume they are better than others because of who they are (versus what they do)? Do they blame or attack others, either for their own mistakes, or for the mistakes of people that they don’t have responsibility for? • Sacrifice: Actually, a willingness to sacrifice, if they need to. Prioritizing to work hard and help others. Mini-test: Do they put others first, or set aside themselves, for greater goals? Do they deal with the most important things in their life, first and foremost? • Gratitude: Feeling and expressing thankfulness, gratitude, and returning kindness. Mini-test: Do they thank others, or express gratefulness, often and sincerely? Are they kind, especially more than they need to be, or to those they don’t have to be? • Patience: Willing to bear with waiting, difficulties, or work, when they need to, without complaining. Mini-test: When something takes longer than they expect, or more work than they’d planned for, do they become angry or upset? Are they working toward any long-term goals?

• Desire (to learn): Willing to work to accomplish more in life, especially to learn more than they do now. Mini-test: Lots of people want than they have, but are they willing to work for it? Are they learning, more and more, so they (or those they love) can have a better life, in every way? So. How about Bella and Edward? How do they do on the mini-tests? Humility Mini-test: Do they assume they are better than others because of who they are (versus what they do)? Bella is very humble, as you can see when she comes to Forks. She doesn’t prance around because she’s the Police Chief’s daughter, or because she’s from the city, or because she’s smarter, or prettier, than others. She values her own good qualities, but she doesn’t feel that this makes her automatically more valuable (as a person) than others; in fact, she is quite uncomfortable when others seem to think that. Edward was once pretty poor at this, coming across as kind of arrogant, at first. And it comes out from time to time later. Which is a problem because as soon as his arrogance appears, his chance to learn anything from what’s going on is shot. But he gets humbled -- which is better than nothing -- after Bella arrives. And once he accepts his own weaknesses, he is a lot easier to be around. Like with most people. His old arrogance may be a big reason why, after 100 years, he still acts a lot like a teenager (along with the whole

vampires-not-changing thing). Once he gains more humility, he learns and grows -- matures -- quickly. Do they blame or attack others, either for their own mistakes, or for the mistakes of people that they don’t have responsibility for? Neither Bella or Edward lash out at others, that we see in Twilight anyway. Edward, one suspects, can be quite a grump. And he seems pretty cold to Alice, at first. Yet neither seems to blame anyone else for anything. Well, except for one time: “Will you ask me to the spring dance?” he continued. “I’m not going to be in town, Tyler.” My voice sounded a little sharp. I had to remember it wasn’t his fault that Mike and Eric had already used up my quota of patience for the day. “Yeah, Mike said that,” he admitted. “Then why —” He shrugged. “I was hoping you were just letting him down easy.” Okay, it was completely his fault. “Sorry, Tyler,” I said, working to hide my irritation. “I really am going out of town.” “That’s cool. We still have prom.”

But Bella is right about Tyler. Plus, she is being careful about finding fault, regardless. And both her and Edward more than make up for it, over and over again: “It was my fault, I forced him to tell me...” It wasn’t really his fault that his voice was so irresistible. Or what his eyes were capable of...

“It’s not your fault,” I sighed. “You can’t help it...” “You didn’t do anything wrong, Bella. It was my fault...” “That’s really my fault,” he said... “It’s my fault — I was a fool to expose you like that.”

In addition, both of them are unfailingly polite. LikeTo the people in the restaurant, for example. Which they didn’t need to be. And Edward is, to his credit, a big tipper. Sacrifice Mini-test: Do they put others first, or set aside themselves, for greater goals? Bella and Edward are already both sacrifice champions when they first meet. Which is good. Because they will both need to sacrifice much more before they are through. If anything, their problem is accepting some things shouldn’t be sacrificed: “But I’m not saying goodbye,” I pointed out. ”Don’t you see? That’s what proves me right. I care the most, because if I can do it” — he shook his head, seeming to struggle with the thought — “if leaving is the right thing to do, then I’ll hurt myself to keep from hurting you, to keep you safe.” I glared. “And you don’t think I would do the same?” ”You’d never have to make the choice.”

There may be a chastity moral/metaphor in there, about being willing to experience discomfort to not take advantage of the other, but in terms of them just spending time together, Edward is (as he so often is) noble -- altruistic, even -but wrong.

Do they deal with the most important things in their life, first and foremost? Bella takes care of her needs first, which is responsible and necessary, but beyond that attends to the needs of others before she relaxes into her own “wants.” Edward is much the same. But love can change everything quickly, including what is most important. So Edward has to rethink his priorities once he realizes that he truly loves Bella. Happily, Bella loves him, too. So they can figure out things -- and choose their priorities -- together, which is an on-going conversation that they continue to have throughout the rest of the Saga, like any healthy couple. - Gratitude Mini-test: Do they thank others, or express gratefulness, often and really meaning it? Bella didn’t want to come to Forks, didn’t want a beat-up truck, didn’t want to live in Charlie’s very (very) quiet house, and (in the movie) didn’t want purple linens from Target. But when she does get those things, she always looks to the bright side, recognizing that Charlie is trying to be kind. So she expresses her thanks to him, regularly and sincerely. “I’ll be in and out all day… you go and have fun.” “Are you sure?” “Absolutely, Dad. Besides, the freezer is getting dangerously low on fish — we’re down to a two, maybe three years’ supply.” “You’re sure easy to live with, Bella.” He smiled. “I could say the same thing about you,” I said, laughing.

When Edward talks about Carlisle and Esme, and all they’ve given to him -- particularly when they took him back after his rebellious phase -- he specifically tells Bella how grateful he feels to live with them. To have them as parents. Are they kind, especially more than they need to be, or to those they don’t have to be? Bella is quite kind to the boys at school (especially considering their utter lack of understanding of her), along with everyone else at the school. Edward, as a vampire who isn’t really supposed to have social relationships with any human, is still always the gentlemen.” Even to the girls at the restaurant. Patience Mini-test: When something takes longer than they expect, or more work than they’d planned for, do they become angry or upset? Bella’s entire move to Forks could be seen in this light, as well as Edward becoming an immortal vampire. Or their entire courtship, for that matter. They have some tense moments, but their gratitude for being together gives them all the patience they need. Are they working toward any long-term goals? Immortality. Pretty long term. Desire Mini-test: Lots of people want more than they have, but are they willing to work for it? Bella is wondering about securing her own heaven-like immortality. And she basically goes to hell and back to get it. Well, perhaps not quite that, but it is quite hot in Phoe-

nix. And then there is the whole, arm-on-fire thing, which sounded pretty hellish in itself. And Edward has turned his life around (in a good way) to earn her trust, and so is worthy of her love. Much of the Twilight Saga is seeing just how far they will go to be together -- to care for the other. It is a profound thing. Are they learning, more and more, so they (or those they love) can have a better life, in every way? Besides her schooling, Bella continues learning more and more about the immortal world from her first glance at the Cullens to the very end of “Breaking Dawn.” One assumes she never will stop learning. The same for Edward, although much of what he is learning is about the mortal world, about Bella, and about his own humanity (in the best sense of the word). Indeed, through their entire journey together, the more they learn about each another, the more they learn about themselves. It’s a journey to learn about their Other, their One, yet it’s also a journey of self-discovery as well. All this is not to say that they don’t make some rather poor decisions throughout the saga, especially if they were made “as-is,” in real life. Like nearly all literary characters. Because bad choices make good stories. They provide drama. But Bella and Edward are ready to learn wisdom, more wisdom, which includes understanding what is really going on in a situation, plus knowing the principles of life that cause, and affect, that situation.

To be clear, while age can help (more time to gain more knowledge), it’s not a guarantee or even a necessity for gaining wisdom. Which is why, often, Bella acts wiser than Edward, who has been 17 for 100 years. Give or take. Plus, in her case, she doesn’t have a murderous vampire rampage to get over as well, which has been a serious setback for Edward, in lots of ways. Everyone faces challenges, fictional characters included. These challenges may be split up into two groups: “inner” challenges, that have to do with how we are inside; and “outer” challenges that concern that which is external to us. Inner challenges may have started a variety of ways, but in the end, they are our problems. They often are our own fault, so, it is our responsibility to deal with and get rid of them. We have to finish them, with or without the help of others, because in the end, we are the only ones who can. External challenges start from outside us, from somewhere out in the world. And even though the problem may not be our fault, it is our responsibility to deal with it, to avoid or end its effects, at least as far as our own life is concerned. That might sound really difficult. However, inner and outer problems are easier to deal with than one might think. Once a person stops playing the “Whose Fault is It?” game, usually the path to figuring out how to fix the problem will be quite simple. For outer challenges, sometimes the answer is to make changes, as necessary (like moving to Forks). But often the

only real “outer” problem is social: What will people think? “What people think about you” usually isn’t very important in the grand scheme of things. Because that’s really about them, not about you. Not your problem. And even when social problems are actually important, they usually boil down to just how you talk about something. What will you say if “so-and-so” says “blank?” Figure out what to say, and many, many “problems” disappear. And that’s about it. Consider Lauren. How she tries to provoke Bella at the beach at La Push. Or how she attacks Bella in the hallway, while Bella’s walking right behind her and can hear every word. Bella just doesn’t talk to Lauren at all. And we never hear of Lauren again. She is seen from time to time, but like the Cullens, Bella is simply on another level entirely. Communication, of any kind, is a gift. Communicating -including arguing -- is a statement that you want to have a relationship with somebody. In that case, an argumentative one. So when arguing seems like a good way to handle a difficult person, think again. Life is usually too short to give gifts to our enemies (or those who just think they are). Even for immortals. To overcome inner problems (or any problems), the answer is even simpler: The answer is going to be found through learning. By gaining more wisdom. The root cause of all inner challenges we face are caused, or supported, by our own ignorance.

Like Bella worrying about getting lost at her new school. Or being frustrated over Edward’s strange responses. Or not realizing the impact her flirting would have on Jacob, the motherless child. Or even her getting lost in Port Angeles. All of these problems started with Bella’s own ignorance. And the solution to all of those? Learn more. Which is why the tables turn so quickly, so often, in Bella’s favor. She’s observant, bright, and wise. Bella goes from being hunted, in Port Angeles, to being the hunter, during the short drive with Edward to the restaurant. By the time the bread sticks arrive, Bella has learned enough about the current situation, and understands the underlying principles of life already well enough, that Edward is now the one being pursued. So to speak. So Bella explains, persuades, and states her stance. She is wise enough to know that she doesn’t want to trick Edward into liking her; such relationships don’t last. So Bella asks Edward lots of questions. She is also wise enough to know that all she really needs is to know more. And Edward does the same. Wisdom. That’s the real “trick.” Of course, the best way to overcome problems is avoid their coming up at all. How? Try Humility, Sacrifice, Gratitude, Patience, and a Desire to learn. To be clear, Twilight is not a lesson in how to be good. But it does offer insights into life. And life works better when people know how to be good. That’s why it’s called “good.” Because it works so well in life.

11. The Wisdom Cycle “How did you know?” I asked, unable to curb my intensity. I realized I was leaning toward him again. He seemed to be wavering, torn by some internal dilemma. His eyes locked with mine, and I guessed he was making the decision right then whether or not to simply tell me the truth. “You can trust me, you know,” I murmured. I reached forward, without thinking, to touch his folded hands, but he slid them away minutely, and I pulled my hand back. “I don’t know if I have a choice anymore.” His voice was almost a whisper. “I was wrong -- you’re much more observant than I gave you credit for.” “I thought you were always right.” “I used to be.”

At the restaurant, and afterward, Bella has lots of questions for Edward. And he for her. For days and days. Because wisdom is the ultimate strength -- the ultimate power. Here is how you get it.

Like many good things in life, gaining wisdom is a cycle, which supports and builds upon itself. Since Bella is our generous -- though sometimes unreliable -- narrator, it will easiest to follow her journey through the Wisdom Cycle. It is for this reason that her story is in “first person” (at least in part) -- so we can clearly see each step of her journey. Through each step of the Wisdom Cycle. The Wisdom Cycle has four stages, and as it happens, each stage is explored in-depth during each of the books of the Twilight Saga: 1. Learn Twilight: Can Bella learn about the immortal world (and Edward) -- and survive? 2. Believe: New Moon: Can Bella believe that she belongs with Edward in the immortal world -- and prove it? 3. Change: Eclipse: Can Bella change and grow enough so that she will be able to live with the powers and dangers of immortality? Including marriage? 4. Commit: Breaking Dawn: With each choice comes consequences. Can Bella commit to living her immortal life well enough to save herself, and those she loves -- once and for all? Overall, Bella learns to manage and control her own life. She learns that people are meant to learn, grow, love, and find happiness. She isn’t just learning things at school; she is learning about life itself, everywhere. She chooses wisely, instead of leaving her life choices to others. It is quite a journey.

Along her journey to becoming a hero, Bella becomes wise, and shows us how to live our own lives well and wisely. Which is really quite nice of her. It is a major reason why we love Bella so; while she is out saving everyone but herself -- and saving herself in the process -- we discover that she has helped save us, too. “My mother drove me to the airport with the windows rolled down. It was seventy-five degrees in Phoenix, the sky a perfect, cloudless blue. I was wearing my favorite shirt -sleeveless, white eyelet lace; I was wearing it as a farewell gesture. My carry-on item was a parka... It was to Forks that I now exiled myself -- an action that I took with great horror. I detested Forks.”

When Bella arrives in Forks -- like a prisoner, riding in a police cruiser -- she is clumsy. She is bored. She is lonely. She doesn’t really know what to do or what’s going on, and what she does know is kind of depressing. She has no real friends, except her flibbertigibbet of a mother. People don’t even say her name right. Plus, it is pouring rain outside. We probably shouldn’t be too surprised that Bella feels trapped by her situation. Because every hero’s story starts off with them being trapped. Their real trap is ignorance. Ignorance doesn’t mean dumb or stupid or that a person cannot learn. It just means they haven’t had a chance to learn -- yet. The problem with ignorance is not only what they don’t know. The real problem is often that they don’t know that

they don’t know. Nor do they know what they are missing, either. So they’re trapped. Ignorance can trap anyone. Even the kind, bright, and prettier-than-they-think people. “Facing my pallid reflection in the mirror, I was forced to admit that I was lying to myself. It wasn’t just physically that I’d never fit in. And if I couldn’t find a niche in a school with three thousand people, what were my chances here?”

It is clear that, no matter what she says, the reason Bella doesn’t fit in with others is, mainly, because she is, in a word, better than them. Bella may not be the proverbial “chess club type,” but she is the “immortal, vampire, goddess type.” So, not only is Bella a first-person narrator, she is something of an unreliable narrator, as well. She sees events fairly clearly (especially about others), but interprets them wrong (especially about herself). Later, Edward says Bella is a terrible liar because no one believes her -- because everyone (including the reader) can see what is really going on with her. In fact, the only person who is really deceived by Bella is... Bella herself. Which is part of the trap of ignorance. Because of her ignorance, Bella’s Worldview is wrong. Or at least, not entirely correct. Her version of what is going on with her is interesting and is, generally, true. But. Her “subjective” view keeps her from seeing her life from an absolutely true point of view. Especially since, at first, she is labeling herself so often -- clumsy, plain, etc. Labels are often really just descriptions of how someone feels about something. Which means they aren’t describing

the thing itself. So they’re unreliable. They can also be too narrow, because while people are always changing, one way or another, their labels are not. So sooner or later, the labels become wrong. If they were ever accurate to begin with. Learning is the first step to gaining wisdom, and although Bella goes through the Wisdom Cycle in small and big ways, she is mostly “Learning” during Twilight -- learning about herself, her potential, and the new world she’s realized she lives in. And, of course, about vampires. One in particular. It’s been said that life is like a deep river, forever flowing downhill. People within the stream of life can either grow and progress, swimming upstream, or they can stop moving forward and drift downwards, but there really is no such thing as treading water in a flowing stream. There is no concrete state that people can reach and just stay there. Everything -- including each person -- is always changing, so if they aren’t growing, then they are getting worse. Including 17-year-old, “unchanging” vampires. Or werewolves, like Jacob. Once he starts “changing,” he tries to stop changing, or growing. It doesn’t go very well. Even though the Wisdom Cycle breaks down the process, and can help a person focus on what they should be seeking next, gaining wisdom isn’t easy. One reason is because, if you go ask an expert -- someone who seems wise -- their answers sometimes sound more like a slogan from elementary school, or a dollar store “motivational “ poster from the hallway at school, or a workplace lunchroom:

• • • • •

“Cheer up.” “Hang in there.” “Set goals.” “Work hard.” “Use your time wisely.”

Those are, obviously, all great points. And they are -- just as obviously -- of no real help whatsoever. • How can you be cheery when things are going poorly? And should you be? • Why should you “hang in there,” when something is obviously going wrong? And possibly getting worse? • Set goals to do... what? • What if all your “hard work” is in the wrong direction -- or is actually making things worse? • Lastly, if a person doesn’t know what they need to do, managing their time better may just help them get worse more quickly. And that isn’t very “wise.” Everyone needs to gain wisdom to succeed in life. But life is more complicated than a single, simple saying. Further, those experts may have forgotten what it really took to become wise. And those who aren’t experts may just be guessing; no matter how well intentioned, people can still be wrong (at least for others’ lives). So, it would seem, there are no easy shortcuts to wisdom.

And compounding things, sooner or later, everyone runs into their own ignorance. They confront a situation of some kind, and don’t know what to do. “And now what?” • Do they choose to remain ignorant -- through denial, fear, stubbornness, or irresponsibility? • Do they choose to Learn, the first step of the Wisdom Cycle? Bella confronts her ignorance when she arrives in Forks. And she chooses to Learn. At the start, Bella realizes she doesn’t know what is going on with Edward Cullen. But it is time to find out. When Bella sees the Cullens for the very first time, she notices how different they are from each other, which in no way compares with how different they all are from everyone else. She identifies certain patterns -- their paleness, their beauty, their grace, even their names. As mentioned earlier, recognizing patterns is essential to learning wisdom, because patterns, broken or not, help reveal underlying principles. If there is a pattern, then, is something tying the pattern together? Is it mere coincidence - or an underlying principle? After Edward returns to Forks, on the snowy day during lunch, Bella notices the Cullens are acting entirely normal. Too normal. All of a sudden... A broken pattern. “They were laughing. Edward, Jasper, and Emmett all had their hair entirely saturated with melting snow. Alice and Rosalie were

leaning away as Emmett shook his dripping hair toward them. They were enjoying the snowy day, just like everyone else -- only they looked more like a scene from a movie than the rest of us. “But, aside from the laughter and playfulness, there was something different, and I couldn’t quite pinpoint what that difference was...”

Earlier, Bella was curious about Edward, while Edward was... anxious about Bella. Now, Edward is the curious one, and Bella is anxious. But at least Bella isn’t thirsty. Even though she only gets a drink for her lunch. In Biology, Bella and Edward are looking at a cycle of cells dividing, while they themselves are in a cycle that will lead to them becoming one - “partners.” The Wisdom Cycle. Edward makes a statement, which is really a question: “I don’t understand.” Then Bella asks a question which is really a statement: “And?” His comment signals that he is entering the Wisdom Cycle through his humility -- his willingness to admit that he doesn’t understand. She explains her willingness to sacrifice in moving to Forks. So they are ready to learn, and sacrifice, for each other. This is why they surprise each other so often, from this point, through the very end of Breaking Dawn: They are each very similar to the other (after they’d given up on that ever being possible for them). The few differences they have from one another are generally something the other wants to be more like (but wasn’t sure was possible). So they are surprised to see in each other a mirror reflection of

themselves, in so many meaningful ways. Just... better. Which is, understandably, a little disconcerting at first: “Dang it, he was right.” But then they go on, trying to learn more about the other, in class, and afterward. And they basically never stop. Some people, when confronting their ignorance, decide that their problems must be in the world itself, not in themselves. In other words, they just accept the sucky parts of life as inevitable, even if that means that life itself is unfair. People accept that life is unfair either because they’re too scared to consider what more they could do, or because they use their life-is-unfair meme as an excuse to act “unfairly” themselves. Bella and Edward do neither. They have thought about it, and they want something more out of life. And that, right there, is the heroic choice. It is the spark that drives a normal person to become a hero. Despite whatever worries they have about their own natural goodness, they know that the status quo -- that “life is unfair” -- is simply not good enough. Not for them. Not for the people they love and care for. Bella and Edward are humble, and willing to sacrifice enough to not only face this question, but also to say that an unfair life is unacceptable. And to do something about it. Sometimes, when facing a difficult-to-answer question, there is a problem with the question itself. Or, in other words, how we are considering the problem. Some guidelines:

First, it can be hard to separate our emotions from the problem itself. So, people should make sure this isn’t just based on emotions about the issue, but is actually a true, realistic look at the problem. Even when the problem is our emotions. Some people “prove” that their Worldview, Approaches, or Behaviors are true by pointing at their emotions. For instance, they may say that since they feel bad about life, then life itself must be bad. But emotions don’t came from life itself; they are our chosen response to our own lives. Further, worry, in and of itself, is not a responsible reaction to the challenges we face. After figuring out the emotions you’re having about the problem, ask this question: Are other people -- at least some people, somewhere -- doing well with this very issue? Are they handling this better? So asking if life is fair is probably not the world’s best question. A more revealing question might be: “If this part of life isn’t “bad” for everyone, then why do I feel so badly?” Because if they are handling the situation well, or at least a little better than you are, then you could handle it differently, too. Better. If they can, you can. Usually, the only difference between them and you is: They know more. So go learn more. Start with what they know (like Bella). And live better.

12. Learn “She stayed with me at first, but she missed him. It made her unhappy… so I decided it was time to spend some quality time with Charlie.” My voice was glum by the time I finished. “But now you’re unhappy,” he pointed out. “And?” I challenged. “That doesn’t seem fair.” He shrugged, but his eyes were still intense. I laughed without humor. “Hasn’t anyone ever told you? Life isn’t fair.” “I believe I have heard that somewhere before,” he agreed dryly. “So that’s all.”

So, are Bella and Edward right? Is life fair? It depends. Some people live wonderful, non-sucky, very-fair lives. So the question itself is wrong. And a wrong question can only get the wrong answer. Another, better way to look at the issue is: “Is my life fair, based on what I am doing? If I knew more, would my life be

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more ‘fair?’” Which leads back to Cause and Effect. The problem with simply deciding that life isn’t fair is -- whether through discouragement, fear of life itself, or because they’re using “unfair” as an excuse -- then the person often stops trying to learn. And it’s hard to grow if you aren’t learning. So they don’t do either. So things go poorly for them in life, in another of those Worldview/self-fulfilling-prophecy ways. And Bella and Edward are discouraged. They don’t know how to move forward in their lives, they don’t know where to go to learn more about life, so that they will know, and like a lot of people, they’re wondering if the problem isn’t them so much as a problem with life itself. Which would be a depressing thought. And that, right there, is why Edward Cullen and Bella Swan both feel “trapped.” How do they escape that trap? It has to do with Humility, Gratitude, and a Desire to learn more. It’s actually a small thing, but it is enough to set them both on a different path in life. A better path. Bella awakens to a new day, and it’s bright outside (for once); her entire world has changed. Everything is -- like Edward himself -- icy cold. She is excited to see him, which she believes (in her discouraged Worldview) is “very, very stupid,” because her “league and his league were spheres that did not touch.” (Of course, she’ll join the Cullen’s vampire

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baseball league soon enough). Let’s return to the van accident, and take another look at it now that we’re (hopefully) a little wiser: “It took every ounce of my concentration to make it down the icy brick driveway alive. I almost lost my balance when I finally got to the truck, but I managed to cling to the side mirror and save myself. Clearly, today was going to be nightmarish.”

Her day will seem “nightmarish,” at times, but eventually more like a “dream come true.” And she’s right, it will take “concentration” -- a focus on learning -- to make it out alive. So, being humble, she knows she could get in an accident driving on the icy roads. Aware of Cause and Effect, even if only a little, she drives carefully to school so she doesn’t “carve a path of destruction through Main Street.” She wonders why the boys seem to like her more in Forks, which she finds “disconcerting,” offering several selfdeprecating possibilities. The real reason, though, is because the clueless boys haven’t realized just how different (read: better) she is than them. But Bella is humble, and is focused on loving others. Which is wonderful, yet she also needs to be loved in return. And Mike and Eric’s territorial rivalry isn’t going to cut it. But it’s a new day for Bella, and it is time to start noticing that she is loved. So when she gets to school, she wants to know why her truck made it to school so easily. And that’s it: She wants to learn more. That’s the most important decision in her life. Tire chains. It’s not very

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momentous. She’s just curious, continually, so she is curious enough to take a moment and look. To see why. It’s so Bella. So when she sees that Charlie, unannounced, has added snow chains to her truck, she feels Gratitude -- another key to gaining wisdom -- and has a surprisingly emotional response: “My throat suddenly felt tight. I wasn’t used to being taken care of, and Charlie’s unspoken concern caught me by surprise. I was standing by the back corner of the truck, struggling to fight back the sudden wave of emotion the snow chains had brought on, when I heard an odd sound.”

It’s Tyler Crowley’s van, skidding across the parking lot. Apparently, the Crowley family isn’t as caring as the Swans. But Edward Cullen is caring. Protective. And curious, too. watching Bella from afar, trying to learn more about her. No doubt wondering why she’s starting to cry. It’s her moment. It’s exactly where she is supposed to be. A moment of destiny. Of course she feels an unexpected rush of emotion! So -- and not for the last time -- Edward saves Bella from Tyler Crowley. Bella has another vampire-like moment, and her perceptions speed up to take in everything around her: The shocked people, Edward watching her from across the parking lot, and Tyler’s van sliding across the ice -- into her, and the cars behind her. Her quickened perceptions take in the van’s three attempts to kill her, and how Edward thwarts each attempt. The glass pops, the momentum of the van

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stops, and Bella’s simple desire to Learn has metaphorically overcome the very forces of nature. And like his father Carlisle has done so often, and at grave personal risk, Edward Cullen has not only not taken a human life, but saved one at the same time. Everything is different now. Although it takes a while for Bella to understand exactly how. At first, she protests that she’s “fine” over and over. She wants to know more -- much more -- about Edward, and for the first of many times to come, realizes that Edward is like an angel. Not a harp-strumming, dress-wearing, winged, angel, but a person who has become a force for good who defies nature itself. And again, it arises as such a simple thing: “We scowled at each other in silence. I was the first to speak, trying to keep myself focused. I was in danger of being distracted by his livid, glorious face. It was like trying to stare down a destroying angel.”

She is committed to learn the truth now, no matter what, but Edward won’t say the truth, or even explain why he won’t. But she gets an immediate lesson on why sharing the truth -- with those who aren’t ready -- can be a recipe for disaster, when Charlie calls Renee about the accident. Bella tells her she is “fine at least thirty times” more, while realizing that she is “consumed by the mystery Edward presented. And more than a little obsessed by Edward himself.” So she gives up, telling herself that she is “stupid, stupid, stupid,” finally takes some pain relievers, and goes to sleep.

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Which is the first night she dreams of Edward Cullen. Bella’s little spark of desire to learn more has burst into a burning need to Learn more. And she will. Ready or not. Because “Learn” is the first step of the Wisdom Cycle. So she continues, going through the cycle over and over, in ways small and great, learning all about Edward, and the Cullens, and vampires, and the immortal world. And life. Life is not “unfair.” But it does take effort. Work. It requires learning to live well. To understand Cause and Effect, to choose the right causes to get the right effects. Life requires wisdom. But that’s not all. The second step of the Wisdom Cycle is to Believe.

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13. Believe “Do you know any of our old stories, about where we came from?”

Bella tries to learn more, but Edward’s fears keep him away. He ignores her. Remember that the keys to enter the Wisdom Cycle are Humility, Sacrifice, Gratitude, Patience, and Desire, especially to learn more. Bella showed her humility, gratitude, and her desire on that day that was like Edward -- bright, reflecting the light, yet icy cold. But she still needs to show she has Patience. And she does. For weeks. She only knows a little about Edward, but it is enough for her to Believe that she really would like to know more. There is an “unusual brightness” the morning Bella

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wakes up to go to La Push, and it will be a day of dreamy enlightenment for her on her Wisdom Journey to the mythical setting of La Push, out on the Quileute reservation. She travels with the high school crew to First Beach, to the literal ends of the earth, and looks out into the great unknown deep. It’s one thing to see the ocean on a map or on TV, and quite another to see it yourself. It’s big. Like the future itself. In both dreams and literature, a trip to the sea is said to be a voyage into one’s own subconscious, into your very “self.” So there are lots of symbols all around, and she just got there. Her guides lead her forward, and then leave her, as she sits alone and ponders a tide pool, where she watches from a “god’s eye view” the little world created in the font below. With several religious metaphors at work, she is led back to the group. Next comes a baptism of fire (of sorts) when her guides light a mystical, blue fire of driftwood. A ray of sun shines on Bella -- one of very few times that happens -- “enlightening” her further. She is given some time for meditation. And she has something of a breakthrough, as Bella realizes that she has (in a sense) passed beyond the real world’s linear time frame into a sense of time more mythic, subjective, and dreamlike: “She left me free to think undisturbed while we ate. And I was thinking about how disjointedly time seemed to flow in Forks, passing in a blur at times, with single images

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standing out more clearly than others. And then, at other times, every second was significant, etched in my mind.”

In a foreshadowing of life itself, her young guides start “to drift away in twos” including “Mike -- with Jessica shadowing him.” Angela leaves her, as well. So, once Bella is left alone -- true to form -- Jacob shows up “to take her place by my side.” Go, Team Jacob! The pair talk about how Rebecca and Rachel are married. Bella, again noting the mythic time shift, “was stunned. The twins were only a little over a year older” than she is now. In her enlightened frame of mind, she recognizes the weight of Sam’s vague statement -- “the Cullens don’t come here” -and since Twilight is about the Learning part of the Wisdom Cycle, Bella tries to learn whatever she can, while she can. And, since she is also subtly becoming more vampiric all the time, she dazzles the motherless Jacob. Flirting can work much better than a person thinks it might. Something Bella lives to regret. So Jacob, clearly dazzled, breaks a centuries-old vow, and tells Bella the ancient stories of his people -- in a religious fashion, starting at the very beginning and going up until the present. Something Jacob lives to regret, also. “Your great-grandfather?” I encouraged. “He was a tribal elder, like my father. You see, the cold ones are the natural enemies of the wolf--well, not the wolf, really, but the wolves that turn into men, like our ancestors. You would call them werewolves.” “Werewolves have enemies?”

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“Only one...” “So how does it fit in with the Cullens? Are they like the cold ones your met?” “No.” He paused dramatically. “They are the same ones.” He must have thought the expression on my face was fear inspired by his story. He smiled, pleased, and continued. “There are more of them now, a new female and a new male, but the rest are the same. In my great-grandfather’s time they already knew of the leader, Carlisle. He’d been here and gone before your people had even arrived.” He was fighting a smile. “And what are they?” I finally asked. “What are the cold ones?” He smiled darkly. “Blood drinkers,” he replied in a chilling voice. “Your people call them vampires.”

Yet, Jacob has the authority as the chief-in-waiting to share these stories with whom he chooses. And he will again, in Eclipse. La Push is where Bella learns why things are they way they are, by being taken on a guided tour from “creation” until “now.” Jacob is a good storyteller. And Bella has learned who -- and what -- Edward is. So she returns home from her first Wisdom Journey to La Push, a changed person. That night, Bella doesn’t eat (a vampire thing). When she sleeps, Edward makes another appearance; he is, literally, the man of her dreams. He asks her to, “Trust me,” for the fourth time, and not the last. And Jacob transforms to a wolf. And not for the last time. Note: Stephenie Meyer did not know, when she wrote this,

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that Jacob and the Quileutes were actually werewolves. One could say that this, too, came to her in a dream: Bella’s. Bella awakens with a start, and there is a little warning about the danger of leaving your hair pinned-up too long. Not for the last time, either. Bella has more to learn, though, about how things came to be the way they are. She searches vampires on the Internet, discovering the “Vampires A-Z” site. As movie-Edward once said, “You can Google it” (http://vampiresaz.webs.com/). Bella reads the quote from Reverend Montague Summers, who was a for-real clergyman who lived in the 1700s. He wrote for-real witch-hunt manuals, before turning to the problems of vampires and werewolves, since they were, after all, monsters. Blame goes to Summers for darkening many vampires’ Worldviews. The next quote is from the for-real philosopher, Jean-Jacques Rousseau, who once wrote, “God makes all things good; man meddles with them and they become evil.” Credit goes to Rousseau for enlightening many humans’ Worldviews. So it is edifying research, for the reader at least. Bella, meanwhile, is frustrated. All she knows is that vampires are said to be everywhere, which suggests that there must be some reason for their cross-cultural appearances. Ironically, Bella also reads about her future father-in-law, Carlisle, the beneficent, “Stregoni Benefici.” Dr. Cullen knows he is on the side of goodness. He probably wouldn’t agree that he is the “mortal enemy of all evil vampires,” though.

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But the Volturi seem to think that’s true. In any case, Bella is aggravated, irritated, and embarrassed, as what she has learned pushes her to the next stage of the Wisdom Cycle: Belief. What does she Believe? Or not? She heads outside for another Wisdom Journey. Note: The Wisdom Cycle is one way to look at how one grows. In little ways and big ways. So a larger circuit of the Wisdom Cycle, say, the entire Twilight Saga, is made up of smaller ones. For example, each of the four books in the series offers its own complete turn through Wisdom Cycle -- even though, each book forms one stage of the cycle within the larger Saga. And within each book are many smaller and smaller Wisdom Cycles. So the Wisdom Cycle itself is made up of little cycles, over and over, each step made up of its own complete circuit. People flash through the Wisdom Cycle in moments, the turn of a clock, the rotation of the moon, the circuit of the sun, the course of a lifetime. Over and over and over. Around and around. Meanwhile, Bella is going through her own mini-circuit as she wrestles over her Belief -- on the question of “vampires.” “Here in the trees it was much easier to believe the absurdities that embarrassed me indoors. Nothing had changed in this forest for thousands of years, and all the myths and legends of a hundred different lands seemed much more likely in this green haze than they had in my clear-cut bedroom. I forced myself to focus on the two most vital questions I had to answer, but I did so unwillingly.”

So Bella breaks her tangle of concerns into basic questions

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-- which is an important Approach, and a really good way to work through issues -- and handles her problem through the steps of the Wisdom Cycle. The initial stage is to Learn. • “First, I had to decide if it was possible that what Jacob had said about the Cullens could be true.” She lists the extraordinary things she noticed about the Cullens. She is a careful observer. Yet much of what she’s learned are things she doesn’t fully understand. But it is enough to move from Learning to Believe: • Second, “Could the Cullens be vampires?” “Well, they were something... Edward Cullen was not... human. He was something more. So then -- maybe. That would have to be my answer for now.”

So her Belief is incomplete, because her Learning is incomplete. A few more rounds of the Wisdom Cycle, in ways large and small, will clear things up for her. There is much more that could be said about Belief, and its amazing benefits, but that will have to wait for another book (about New Moon). Meanwhile, the next step for this small-but-pivotal Wisdom Cycle as Bella sits in the deepening forest is Change: • Third, “And then the most important question of all. What was I going to do if it was true?”

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Bella narrows the possible Changes she could make to three forms-of-Be: 1. What can she do? 2. What should she do? 3. What will she do? Big questions. As adolescent brains develop, they become aware of previously unknown possibilities. Suddenly. Thus, sometimes, they feel overwhelmed. As does Bella, often enough. And Edward, frequently. Yet, the practical answers to those (seemingly endless) questions are actually quite limited -- like everything else in this temporal world. Only two options seemed practical. The first was to take his advice: to be smart, to avoid him as much as possible. To cancel our plans, to go back to ignoring him as far as I was able. To pretend there was an impenetrably thick glass wall between us in the one class where we were forced together. To tell him to leave me alone -- and mean it this time. I was gripped in a sudden agony of despair as I considered that alternative. My mind rejected the pain, quickly skipping on to the next option.

The fourth stage of the Wisdom Cycle is to Commit: “I could do nothing different. After all, if he was something... sinister, he’d done nothing to hurt me so far. In fact, I would be a dent in Tyler’s fender if he hadn’t acted so quickly. So quickly, I argued with myself, that it might have been sheer reflexes. But if it was a reflex to save lives, how bad could he be? I retorted... “There was one thing I was sure of, if I was sure of anything. The dark Edward in my dream last night was

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a reflection only of my fear of the word Jacob had spoken, and not Edward himself. Even so, when I’d screamed out in terror at the werewolf’s lunge, it wasn’t fear for the wolf that brought the cry of ‘no’ to my lips. It was fear that he would be harmed -- even as he called to me with sharp-edged fangs, I feared for him. “And I knew in that I had my answer. I didn’t know if there ever was a choice, really. I was already in too deep. Now that I knew -- if I knew -- I could do nothing about my frightening secret. Because when I thought of him, of his voice, his hypnotic eyes, the magnetic force of his personality, I wanted nothing more than to be with him right now. Even if... but I couldn’t think it. Not here, alone in the darkening forest.

Bella has now progressed to a new level, and is a changed person, with a new Worldview. She seems to wonder if the whole world changed, too? Will her path home be gone? Not yet. She finds her way out of the “maze,” “surprised,” she says, “at how far I had come.” Indeed. With her commitment made, she has a “quiet, productive” day (and days ahead), because: “That had always been my way, though. Making decisions was the painful part for me, the part I agonized over. But once the decision was made, I simply followed through -- usually with relief that the choice was made. Sometimes the relief was tainted by despair, like my decision to come to Forks. But it was still better than wrestling with the alternatives. This decision was ridiculously easy to live with. Dangerously easy.”

The final stage to Commit may seem to be the most difficult, but once done, it makes everything else easier.

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By moving forward in the Wisdom Cycle, we can look back and see things more clearly. As they say, hindsight is 20/20. So far, Bella is the archetypally heroic “seeker,” seeking to understand truth. In Twilight, the main question she is trying to answer is, “Who is Edward?” To gain knowledge fully, she must love (and welcome) the truth, so she can welcome (and love) the effects that truth has on her and her life. In this case, truth is represented by the immortal Edward, and all his existence means for the world. Or, she can flee both Edward and the truth of the immortal world around her. In this sense, truth is not just a series of facts. The reach of life’s truths empower our almost-hero to overcome their challenges until their heroic path is fully revealed -- until they can seize the crown of “hero” with a heroic act. This kind of truth is revealed as a series of Patterns -- a series which is its own, larger pattern of patterns -- which, in turn, reveals the underlying Principles of life. So heroes can understand what’s going on, and why. Once heroes gain that wisdom, they can apply these “why” based principles to new situations. In powerful ways. Anyone can follow that same pattern, including Bella. For example, Bella learns that vampires are lured by blood, in general. Hers, in particular. So that truth -- that principle -is something she can apply elsewhere. Even in, say, a Phoenix ballet studio, for instance. Something that just might come in handy.

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Especially because, Edward, even in another hundred years, will never reveal himself deliberately (or so he thinks). There is too much at stake. The Volturi’s culture has taught -- and demanded, at point of death -- that he should not reveal himself to a human. His entire family could be (and already is) at risk. And, perhaps, since Edward already lost one very important female in his life (his mother), he is too fearful of his heart being broken again, if he were to lose another -- if Bella rejects him. Especially because, as he supposes, she should reject him. After all, he is a monster. Edward doesn’t Believe in himself. And it’s understandable that he wants to keep all the rules. But sometimes we have to prioritize, and put the truly important things first. Yet Edward is revealed to Bella already, at least as being... superhuman. And Bella has kept that truth safe and secret since then. She doesn’t know much, but she knows enough to Believe and, apparently, enough to lure him out, however unknowingly she does so. In the Twilight Saga, sometimes Bella explains herself beforehand. Sometimes after. Sometimes, not at all. So Bella goes shopping, gets lost, and when the mostdangerous being in Port Angeles asks her to “get in” his car (for the second time) she believes that when she does, she will be safe. She believes in him. She believes in Edward, when he has trouble believing in himself -- despite all evidence to the contrary. He still

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hasn’t forgiven himself for his “rebellious stage,” despite the normality of that time in his life for a vampire. So she tries to let him know -- at the least -- that she forgives him, for that, and (over time) everything else. To show Edward that he can be forgiven. And eventually -- with a few more circuits of the Wisdom Cycle -- he does Believe. Perhaps if he was more forgiving of himself he would have understood earlier. Regardless, he’s going to have to make some changes. Which is convenient, because Change is the next step of the Wisdom Cycle.

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14. Change The third stage of the Wisdom Cycle is to Change. To fully Change, Bella must pass a few tests first, to escape her “trapped” circumstances, or she won’t know how to act effectively. • The first test is: Will Bella betray the immortals after Edward (partially) reveals his true vampire/angelic nature at the van accident? • The second test is: Will Bella try to escape from Edward and the immortal world after the attack in Port Angeles? • The third test is: Will Bella “run screaming from the room” once the immortal world is opened to her, in the Meadow, and at the Cullen’s home?

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And once she passes that third test, she will be empowered by her knowledge, so that she can then face a final, culminating challenge: To show that she has the ability to live on the same level as the immortals/vampires. The final test is: Will Bella overcome the immortal world entirely, by facing James at the dance studio, drawing him -- and the Cullens -- into what essentially is her trap. The vampires will be lured by a human. Dazzled, in a way. At last, the hunted will become the hunter. No longer trapped, she will set one of her own. For a Change. And become the hero. To Change is to put one’s Beliefs into action. It can be painful, because it requires acknowledging one’s ignorance and mistakes, repairing things, and doing things differently. Better. Do Bella and Edward believe enough to truly Change? But first, a new day has dawned for Bella, and she awakens to a bright, sunny day. Which is a Change, and a pattern. One thing Bella needs to Change is her hang-ups over marriage itself. So, when Charlie is happy to see her cheerfulness that morning, she notices that, “When Charlie smiled, it was easier to see why he and my mother had jumped too quickly into an early marriage.” Marriage is a big, big step. It requires serious thought. And Bella has, without her really noticing, begun thinking about it already. Which is another change. But Bella still has more Patience to Learn. So no Edward today. But she hurries to school anyway, and sits basking in the sun, doodling five pairs of dark eyes watching her -- the

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Cullen children? It seems likely that Edward is the only one of them actually watching her, hidden from the light, literally and metaphorically. So when Mike shows up and gently tucks some of Bella’s hair behind her ear, Edward is likely listening to whatever she “secretly” says to Mike. One way or another, things are going to change for Edward, at least, as a result. So when Bella tells Mike that her essay is about “whether Shakespeare’s treatment of the female characters is misogynistic,” it underscores the obvious disconnect between Mike and her. He is not only treating her in a patronizingly possessive/misogynistic way, he doesn’t even understand the word. Edward, no doubt, is relieved by her discomfort, especially when she redirects Mike towards Jessica. Bella, for the record, really dislikes misogyny, the disrespect of women. Which may suggest to suspicious or paranoid readers that Bella, herself, does not believe her story is misogynistic either. Indeed, most of what is changed for the good throughout the Twilight Saga is actually done by women. The men usually just make things worse -- Edward, Carlisle, Jacob, Emmett, Jasper, James, Laurent, Aro, and even Charlie. They either mess things up, or almost do -unless a woman (or two) steps in to save the day. One assumes that Edward continues as Bella’s guardian angel throughout the day, while she is wondering where he is until, after school, she lays down on a quilt in the backyard and falls asleep. Closer to him than she realizes, no doubt.

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“I would think of nothing but the warmth on my skin, I told myself severely. The breeze was still light, but it blew tendrils of my hair around my face, and that tickled a bit. I pulled all my hair over my head, letting it fan out on the quilt above me, and focused again on the heat that touched my eyelids, my cheekbones, my nose, my lips, my forearms, my neck, soaked through my light shirt...”

One wonders what he was thinking, watching her, sleeping. Knowing Edward, he was thinking a great many things. There is a lot of sleeping in the Twilight Saga. And dreaming. And dream-like events. And dreamy characters. And dreams themselves. Dreams are a way for the subconscious to work through unanswered questions. Kind of like what stories are for the conscious mind. Key parts of Twilight are often revealed (or understood) during dreams. Major decisions are worked out while Bella is in bed -- with or without Edward -- or when she is either falling asleep or just waking up. Since the whole series was conceived in a dream, that seems appropriate. And yet, the vampires never sleep at all. Perhaps that’s why they have so many unresolved issues. And perhaps that is why Edward loves to watch over Bella while she sleeps, borrowing from her dream-state, in a way, to rethink the issues of his own life. To Change. In any case, Bella wakes up from her nap, “with the sudden feeling that I wasn’t alone.” It’s the single time she is uncomfortable with Edward watching over her while she slept. And she was out in the open, in Charlie’s unfenced backyard. Regardless, we probably shouldn’t be upset with

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Edward for watching over her while she sleeps. After all, we are doing the same thing. And borrowing from her dreamstate. The next day, the Cullens are absent, continuing a pattern, or a broken one, of not-going to school (a Change?). Bella goes to Port Angeles (another Change). The angelic Angela explains this pattern of avoiding school during sunny days while she tries on prom shoes in Port Angeles. Port Angeles: The place where angels arrive. Note: Although specifically escaping would-be assailants is a good idea, simply running from fears is generally not. Because then your fears can be used to -- or will, by themselves -control you. The street was lined on both sides by blank, doorless, windowless walls. I could see in the distance, two intersections down, streetlamps, cars, and more pedestrians, but they were all too far away. Because against the western building, midway down the street, were the other two men from the group, both watching with excited smiles as I froze dead on the sidewalk. I realized then that I wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t being followed. I was being herded.

Thus far, Bella has more or less run from her fears (as has Edward). Which leads to her being chased, stalked, or driven by her fears, including (through her fears of socially awkward situations) by Mike, Eric, Tyler. And Jacob. And Edward, who is most definitely stalking her in more ways than one. And now there is the dangerous gang of would-be attackers from Port Angeles stalking her, as well, albeit at an altogether

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more dangerous level. Bella’s problem here isn’t her beauty. Her appearance doesn’t force anyone to do anything, and it is no excuse for their behavior. Yet Bella, being “herded” by the gang, is always willing to learn, and is, thus, still our hero. So, realizing that running from her fears hasn’t helped her -- now or in the rest of her life -- she Changes. Bella finally stops running. And turns to fight. How heroic! She humbly acknowledges that her attack probably won’t be successful against so many -- because she’s no longer ignorant, and finally knows what she hadn’t known -- but she steels herself anyway... And prepares to spring. How vampiric! But we don’t get to see that. Not now anyway. Yet, as a direct effect, she is perfectly poised to simply hop into Edward’s car when he skids to a stop... As she launches her real “attack.” At Edward. Because what Bella really wants isn’t to beat up attackers. She is a seeker. She wants the Truth. And now that she has turned from her fears, to face them, she is able to catch Edward, at last. Of course, Bella did not place herself in danger purposely. Neither was she doing so, when she instinctively turned to face the on-coming van screeching across the ice toward her.

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But in turning to face it, rather than running, she was able to “trap” Edward -- there, between the two vehicles smashing together. If she’d just run from the noise, without turning to look -- to see why -- she either would have gotten away from the van, or been hit, or he could have pushed her away in a flash, and she would have thought she’d merely tripped. And still wouldn’t know who Edward was, to this day. Yet, in both incidents, she successfully lures Edward into revealing his true nature further -- a pattern she will use later in Twilight’s climax. And now, for her attack. The scene at the restaurant is a major moment in the Twilight Saga. It’s worth examining carefully. Both of them are simultaneously relieved to be reunited again. But Bella’s growing vampiric nature is Changing her into a “danger magnet” -- like real vampires, who seem to encounter danger whenever they meet others (like Bella and Edward, right now. Yet she is still vulnerably human. Edward’s potentially dangerous nature is brought out in the difficulty he has controlling his temper (and “thirst” for vengeance) toward Bella’s stalkers. Yet he is the one in “danger” now. Because Bella is the archetypal seeker. And she is relentless, despite her calm demeanor -- the better to lure him in. Of course, the reason that Bella’s “attacks” -- to gain more information about him -- work at all is because of her transparent sincerity, and growing love, for Edward.

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She wants to help Edward to go through the Wisdom Cycle -- starting with Learning that he can trust her. And the best way to do that, of course, is to actually be trustworthy. The best way to “get” him to love her, is to love him first. Which, as it happens, she does. So the trick to “getting” him is: There is no trick. Bella is the real thing. Unlike, for example, the wait staff, with their tiresome double entendres, at the Italian restaurant. Who seem more interested in taking, in a sense, than they are in “serving.” Meanwhile, Edward, with his multiple medical degrees, is mostly just worried. As per usual. In this case, about Bella going into shock. Because “a normal person would be.” Which is a mistake for at least three reasons. First, Bella is actually an immortal-superhero-goddess-intraining, so normal human being stuff does not really apply. Second, what he said is not entirely true, because almost getting hurt is not the same thing as actually being hurt. If she was hurt, then there would be no time to panic, because they’d need to do something about it. If she wasn’t hurt, then there is no need for panic. And later on, either way, hurt or not, the peril is past and gone, so there is no reason to panic then, either. It’s never a good time to panic. Third, Edward is the one in shock now, the one who is beginning to realize -- a little too late -- that he is the one who is trapped. It is time for him to Change.

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He seemed to be wavering, torn by some internal dilemma. His eyes locked with mine, and I guessed he was making the decision right then whether or not to simply tell me the truth. “You can trust me, you know,” I murmured. I reached forward, without thinking, to touch his folded hands, but he slid them away minutely, and I pulled my hand back. “I don’t know if I have a choice anymore.” His voice was almost a whisper. “I was wrong -- you’re much more observant than I gave you credit for.” “I thought you were always right.” “I used to be” He shook his head again. “I was wrong about you on one other thing, as well. You’re not a magnet for accidents -- that’s not a broad enough classification. You are a magnet for trouble. If there is anything dangerous within a ten-mile radius, it will invariably find you.” “And you put yourself into that category?” I guessed. His face turned cold, expressionless. “Unequivocally.” I stretched my hand across the table again -- ignoring him when he pulled back slightly once more -- to touch the back of his hand shyly with my fingertips. His skin was cold and hard, like a stone. “Thank you.” My voice was fervent with gratitude. “That’s twice now.” His face softened. “Let’s not try for three, agreed?”

Sorry, Edward. Stories usually come in three acts. One more to go. Given Bella’s vampire-level observation skills, the safest path for him now is simply to tell the truth. Which will bring them closer together. Which is what he really wants anyway. Which will allow them to deal with the Effects together, for better or worse.

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A test of character: Is Bella grateful? Plus, a test of how well you know Twilight. Can you follow Bella’s story through her thanks? “That’s really nice, Dad. Thanks. I really appreciate it.” “Wow, Dad, I love it! Thanks!” “I thanked him, knowing his hope was wasted.” “‘I’m Eric,’ he added... I smiled tentatively. ‘Thanks.’” “‘Smells good, Bell...’ ‘Thanks.’” “Thankfully, Mr. Banner started class at that moment.” “‘Thank you.’ I waited, fuming and expectant.” “He had in fact saved my life... overnight, the heat of my anger faded into awed gratitude...” “‘Thank you,’ I said icily.” “I was tremendously grateful to Jacob...” “Thank you for asking me, but I’m going to be in Seattle...” “I had more money than I was used to having, since, thanks to Charlie, I hadn’t had to pay for a car.” “‘Thanks.’ I smiled at him. ‘Will you be back in time for the dance?’” “My truck works just fine, thank you very much for your concern.” “‘Thanks,’ I said as he followed me out. ‘It’s almost worth getting sick to miss Gym.’” “‘And thanks,’ I added earnestly.” “I’d have to thank Phil again.” “‘Thanks,’ I muttered, still thirsty.” “‘Thanks,’ I said again, sliding my arms into his jacket.” “’Thank you.’ My voice was fervent with gratitude. ‘That’s twice now...’” “’I’m ready to leave,’ I qualified, overly grateful that we had the hour-long ride home together.’” “I looked at the sidewalk, grateful that he didn’t seem to be able to know what I was thinking...”

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“’No one has tried to do away with me today,’ I reminded him, grateful for the lighter subject...” “It was a vain hope. ‘Yes, thank you,’ I said.” “Hey, Jessica... Thanks for remembering.” “Then, thankfully, Mr. Varner called on Jessica for an answer.” “I peeked across the cafeteria toward Emmett, grateful that he wasn’t looking my way...” “Thanks, Mike — you don’t have to do this, you know.” “‘How are you today?...’ ‘Good, thank you.’” “I was grateful again that I was the one person whose mind he couldn’t hear...” “‘No, it looks good on you...’ ‘Thanks,’ I whispered.” “Thank you. I’m glad to meet you, too.” “The last note hovered poignantly in the silence. ‘Thank you,’ I murmured.” “‘Thanks,’ I said, though I had no idea what it could be. ‘Why don’t you come in for a minute and dry off?’” “‘Thanks,’ I repeated, but with feeling this time.” “‘Thanks again for the fish fry,’ I hinted.” “I sighed with relief. ‘Thanks, Billy.’” “I hoped I hadn’t offended either of them, that they would know how grateful I was for the sacrifices they were making on my account...” “Thank you, Mom.” “Tell them thank you for me. Alice especially, please.” “I was suddenly grateful that Jasper was gone...” “...wouldn’t ask for my change. ‘Thank you,’ I whispered.” “‘Is the fire gone?...’ ‘Yes,’ I sighed. ‘Thank you, Edward.’” “I realized again that I was alive, this time with gratitude and elation...” “‘You’ll feel better now...’ ‘Thanks,’ I mumbled, unenthusiastic.” “‘Thanks,’ I sighed... ‘Anytime.’” ”Um, thanks. So why did Billy pay you to come here?” ”Tell him I said thanks. I know he means well.”

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The truth is usually the safest path, but especially when you’re dealing with someone you love, and they love you in return. And so the understanding of the one, leads to the understanding of the other. Which is Bella’s point. And which shows just how deeply Bella’s unplanned “trap” goes; love is a powerful thing. It can bring on lots of Changes. Gratitude is another powerful thing. After Bella thanks Edward for saving her life twice, he finally trusts her (Belief -- a relief!), and the truth comes spilling out. This is a real Change for him, as he’s never been completely truthful with a human (and perhaps anyone). Love can be such a relief. And Edward is guarded. After all, his name means “rich” (which he is, in a variety of ways) plus “guard,” which comes from “ward,” as in warding off evil... or Bella. But Edward can feel Bella’s open appreciation, her offer of friendship, and her heartfelt compassion for him. All she asks for, in return, is the truth. So -- even though he continues to mix up his emotions about the situation, with the situation itself -- he eventually drops his fear-based series of commands in order to make a deal. “And yet here you sit.” There was a trace of disbelief in his voice; he raised one eyebrow. “Yes, here I sit... because of you.” I paused. “Because somehow you knew how to find me today... ?” I prompted. He pressed his lips together, staring at me through narrowed eyes, deciding again. His eyes flashed down to my full plate, and then back to me.

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“You eat, I’ll talk,” he bargained. I quickly scooped up another ravioli and popped it in my mouth.

At last. Bella eats real food in front of Edward. Phew! Edward explains that he followed Bella to Port Angeles to protect her. If she needed it. He hasn’t cared for a fragile human like this before (another Change), and the idea of the death of someone he loves is a scary thing. His worries are not generally a good thing, but they are normal... among humans anyway. Fears of accidental death are foreign to the immortal Edward. Thus, his concerns for Bella’s precious life humanizes Edward (more Change). As mentioned earlier, the presence of the Cullens and Quileutes draws immortals to the timeless forests of Forks -with Bella included in that number. As her destined, immortal nature is gradually revealed (beginning with her heavenly scent), she has become a target. Why? Although most of the immortals had immortality thrust upon them, Bella seeks it -- gradually gaining wisdom until she is prepared for immortality. Every hero is asked to heed the “Call to Adventure.” Thus, in a sense, Bella, being a very good person, has been “called” to immortality. Consequently, those who have been similarly called, but have refused to grow and accept their responsibilities -- to fully heed their Call -- resent her. Why do they -- everyone from Lauren, to Rosalie, to Caius, to the critics of Twilight -- resent Bella? In general, everyone is faced with certain responsibilities in life: to grow, to adapt,

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to lead. To become heroes, for themselves and those they love and who count on them. The responsibilities of life “call” to them. Yet many people refuse to step up when they are called. And then, they make excuses for why they aren’t doing so. A popular excuse is that what they have been asked to do is impossible, which they support by saying that, among the people they know, no one else is doing it. Which, often enough, may be true... until someone like Bella shows up. Someone who is growing, adapting, and (intentionally or not) showing others that they can progress through the Wisdom Cycle. It breaks their Worldview (or rather, reveals their flaws). And people who will not Change don’t like to have their Worldviews threatened. At. All. Because then they will have to Change, based on what they Learn about themselves, and life itself. So now the person’s original excuses -- that life is too nasty, too brutish, and too short for them to truly grow, to become altruistic, to live well -- are proven wrong. “So,” they often think in response, “if I can make them stop growing...” Or fail. Or suffer. “Then, it would prove I was right after all.” Then they can say that the struggling heroes of the world are merely foolish and weak -- rather than as wise and strong as they first appeared to be (and truly are).

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When people -- who are too proud, too lazy, or too cruel to Change -- decide to follow through, and begin to seek the destruction of others in order to make their own failings appear better in comparison... That is when they turn away from the direction-less, life-as-a-meaningless-series-of-ups-and-downs Worldview so common in the world. That is when they begin to become something else entirely. To become monstrous. To become evil. To become the villains of life’s story. More on that in a later book on the Twilight Saga. In any case, since Bella has only begun to learn, to change, and to grow, she is still vulnerable. Especially to those (like Caius) who really are committed to evil, to destroying anyone learning, believing, and changing faster than they are. Like many young people taking on adult roles, Bella still lacks all the wisdom that she will need to live safely and well. Yet she still faces many of the same risks. Meanwhile, back at the Italian restaurant, a major problem for Edward is that he is still struggling with his guilt -- and on-going instinct -- to go after Bella’s would-be attackers. His instincts are intensified by all of his “rebellious years” of stalking other, would-be murderers. For now, Edward is struggling over accepting his calling -- including being with Bella -- because Change forces us to confront our misunderstandings, our mistakes, and the parts of our Worldviews that are wrong. He is drowning in his guilt over being an immortal vampire -- which he fears corrupts him much more than it grants the potential for

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greatness. Of course, these same issues that Edward is so uncomfortable with are precisely what Bella wants to Learn. Will Edward change? Can he change? He rises, over-paying his debt to the server, while announcing, “No change.” Bella has no such confusion. She believes in Edward, and in the promise of immortality. As they leave the restaurant, while Bella sighs, wondering if they will ever reach the “first kiss stage,” she marvels at his “grace,” which could have a several meanings. Where Edward sees himself as an immortal demon, Bella sees an immortal angel. Can she change herself enough to truly understand his potential, his goodness? Can she become that good herself? Will she? “Now,” he said significantly, “it’s your turn.”

The two leave together and change course -- “flipping around” in a U-turn -- and speed away together along their new path in life. Their new path leads to long talks, days of questions and answers, and to the Meadow. Bella and Edward’s questions about one another drive the story forward as they both Desire to learn more. And that key to the Wisdom Cycle, Desire, propels them to Learn, to Believe, and to Change.

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15. Commit We were in front of Charlie’s house. The lights were on, my truck in its place, everything utterly normal. It was like waking from a dream. He stopped the car, but I didn’t move. “Do you promise to be there tomorrow?” “I promise.”

The fourth step of the Wisdom Cycle is to Commit. Change is continued, balanced, and made stronger by Commitment. It is the final step in the Wisdom Cycle. So it is the final test that every hero faces. When Bella and Edward ride home from the restaurant in Port Angeles, they go through the Wisdom Cycle over and over, growing, Changing. But when they arrive at Bella’s home -- concluding her Wisdom Journey -- it is time to finish the Cycle as well. It is time to Commit. “Do you promise to be there tomorrow?”

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It is a little promise, but it completes the Wisdom Cycle, and so, it brings them to a higher level as they progress through the cycle over and over, like moving up another level in a spiral. Edward asks Bella for a commitment in return, from something he apparently noticed while being her guardian angel as she napped in her back yard. “Will you promise me something?” “Yes,” I said, and instantly regretted my unconditional agreement. What if he asked me to stay away from him? I couldn’t keep that promise. “Don’t go into the woods alone... I’m not always the most dangerous thing out there. Let’s leave it at that.” I shuddered slightly at the sudden bleakness in his voice, but I was relieved. This, at least, was an easy promise to honor. “Whatever you say.”

A seemingly small commitment for her, too, but again, it brings her to another level. As Edward asks her to “sleep well,” she is dazzled once again, and stumbles to the doorstep and through her awkward encounters with Charlie and Jessica. They’re awkward because Bella has gained wisdom, she now sees things from a higher point of view. She has matured (quickly) and they... haven’t. She is seeing the world differently now. And then, from her new, higher perspective in the spiral of life, she realizes a new level of truth:

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My mind still swirled dizzily, full of images I couldn’t understand, and some I fought to repress. Nothing seemed clear at first, but as I fell gradually closer to unconsciousness, a few certainties became evident. About three things I was absolutely positive. First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there was part of him -- and I didn’t know how potent that part might be -- that thirsted for my blood. And third, I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

Bella is committed. One can see just how much Bella has Changed when she welcomes the dark, foggy morning as “absolutely perfect.” And when her heart stops, briefly, as she sees Edward’s car awaiting her. Meanwhile, he is grappling with his vampire and human sides, as can be seen in his crooked smiles -- part eager, part dread. Edward partly wants Bella to ride with him to school, but another part hopes she will refuse -- “it was a vain hope.” Yet, after the commitments of the night before, Edward is at a new level, too. They go to school, meet Jessica, she leaves. And then, in its own little Wisdom Cycle, Edward brushes a strand of her hair back -- and finding a more welcoming response than Mike did a few days before -- he off-handedly asks her if she wouldn’t “mind” going steady with him. Bella doesn’t mind. Another Commitment. Edward smiles his uneven smile -half delighted, half anxious -- and tells her that he will be (and, likely, has been) “following” her through the thoughts of others.

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Under Jessica’s grilling, Bella eventually confesses: “How much do you like him?” “Too much,” I whispered back. “More than he likes me. But I don’t see how I can help that.”

When Bella meets up with Edward after class -- “looking more like a Greek god than anyone had a right to” -- they go to lunch, where he eventually confesses, “Do you truly believe that you care more for me than I do for you?” There are worse problems to have in a relationship than arguing which of you loves the other more. On the other hand, it is an argument, so that isn’t good, and this particular one will not be fully resolved until the second-to-last page of the entire Twilight Saga (and may be upended on the final page, and then back, as they each respond in kind). Earlier, on the way to school, Edward accused Bella of editing out much of what she was thinking. And now, at lunch, he says, I do want to know what you’re thinking -- everything. I just wish… that you wouldn’t be thinking some things... but that’s not really the point...

Of course, that is the point. Edward and Bella need to communicate clearly what they are thinking, or they won’t be able to end their fears. And the best way to resolve fears is through Learning about them. “I can’t be sure -- I don’t know how to read minds -- but sometimes it seems like you’re trying to say goodbye when you’re saying something else.” That was the best I could sum up the sensation of anguish that his words triggered in me at times.

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“Perceptive,” he whispered. And there was the anguish again, surfacing as he confirmed my fear. “That’s exactly why you’re wrong, though,” he began to explain, but then his eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, ‘the obvious’?” “Well, look at me,” I said, unnecessarily as he was already staring. “I’m absolutely ordinary -- well, except for bad things like all the near-death experiences and being so clumsy that I’m almost disabled. And look at you.” I waved my hand toward him and all his bewildering perfection. His brow creased angrily for a moment, then smoothed as his eyes took on a knowing look. “You don’t see yourself very clearly, you know. I’ll admit you’re dead-on about the bad things,” he chuckled blackly, “but you didn’t hear what every human male in this school was thinking on your first day.” I blinked, astonished. “I don’t believe it…” I mumbled to myself. “Trust me just this once -- you are the opposite of ordinary.”

And among the fears they both face, is Bella’s recurring fear that she simply doesn’t match well with Edward’s “god-like,” “bewildering perfection.” And although she needs to grow in some ways -- including literally becoming immortal herself -- he needs to move beyond being seventeen, which in many ways, he still is... even after 100 years. Edward mirrors Bella in many ways -- including seeing himself unclearly. He compares Emmett’s hunting (and Emmett himself) to a bear, then compares himself to a lion; in other words, he sees himself as less than human, more like an animal. Rosalie has the same problem, glaring at Bella. And yet, when Bella actually does see him hunt, in Breaking Dawn, she describes him not as an animal or monster, but as “glorious.” So until Bella and Edward can see themselves as they

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really are, which is how the other sees them -- “see as they are seen,” as the saying goes -- they won’t be able to reach the level they need to. In other words, while Edward and Bella despair over the ways they are different, their main issue is not their mortal/ immortal bodies, it is their fears over their mortal/immortal bodies. Fears they have both chosen to have. How a person “feels” emotionally about things is not simply how things are. Emotions are separate from the things themselves. Emotions aren’t built-in. And you can see that because some people lose all direction due to their emotions about something, while others remain in control and effective during the very same experience. Which shows that emotions are not part of the thing itself. Emotions are something people add to their experience of the thing. Emotions are a choice. So people don’t have to allow themselves to become irresponsible because they’re being “emotional.” To escape the traps of ignorance, they need to Learn. Which includes learning about their fears. Until Bella faces those fears, and overcomes them through the Wisdom Cycle, she will keep falling down at least as often as she rises to the challenges she faces. For all her efforts, she will never truly progress. So it isn’t Bella’s clumsiness that leads most often to her “falling;” it is her fears. Edward sums up Bella’s main challenge succinctly -- and he

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should know, because he has the same problem: “You don’t see yourself very clearly, you know.” So, here’s one moral of the story, thus far: Do you see yourself clearly? And since our Worldview affects everything in our life, how we see ourselves is of primary importance. The goal isn’t merely “self-esteem” -- to decide how awesome we are -sometimes, it’s quite the opposite. The goal is to see ourselves clearly. Truthfully. Accurately. Then, we can truly progress, instead of stumbling like the emotionally clumsy Bella. The idea that “life is a series of ups and downs” is based in that same ignorance. Of course, life is like that, for some people -- because they chose it to be so. But it doesn’t have to be. So the question is, as Edward and Bella mirror one another, growing together more and more, are we -- the readers -mirroring them? Are we growing, too? Do we see ourselves -- and our lives -- “very clearly?” Will we? Because while that may be our greatest fear, it may also become our greatest achievement (or, at least, will lead us to it). It is, for many, the foundation upon which they create a heavenly life, here on Earth, like the Cullens did. Bella and Edward get a glimpse of how their life can be in the Meadow. As they Commit to one another. By revisiting the Meadow, we can see how their series of Commitments leads to greater happiness.

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First, the Meadow is -- according to Bella -- the loveliest place on earth. The couple is bathed in light as the sun shines down upon them, and nature itself is in harmony with them on what Bella says is her warmest day since coming to Forks. On this day, the Meadow is like a Garden of Eden, a heaven on earth -- or at least, a place where heaven and earth meet. Holy ground. A good place for a wedding, or at least, a symbolic one. Here is where the angelic, god-like Edward can reveal his true nature -- as a being of incredible abilities and strength who literally radiates light. Edward in the sunlight was shocking. I couldn’t get used to it, though I’d been staring at him all afternoon. His skin, white despite the faint flush from yesterday’s hunting trip, sparkled, like thousands of tiny diamonds were embedded in the surface. He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt open over his sculpted, incandescent chest, his scintillating arms bare. His glistening, pale lavender lids were shut, though of course he didn’t sleep. A perfect statue, carved in some unknown stone, smooth like marble, glittering like crystal.

Edward sings, like angels do, even though Bella is too human to hear. They kneel by each other. She holds his hands, in different ways, and he asks her to tell him what she is thinking... and she tells him her three wishes: 1. To Learn: “I was wishing I could know what you were thinking…” 2. To Believe: “I was wishing that I could believe that you were real.” 3. To Change: “And I was wishing that I wasn’t afraid.”

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In response, Edward first Learns what Bella is thinking (by listening to her three wishes). Second, he asserts his own Belief when he responds, “I don’t want you to be afraid.” Third, he Changes when he faces his own vampiric nature, reveals it to Bella, and explains how truly, incredibly dangerous he feels that he is. And, he sees Bella’s response, as she becomes fully aware of the risk she faces: I sat without moving, more frightened of him than I had ever been. I’d never seen him so completely freed of that carefully cultivated facade. He’d never been less human… or more beautiful. Face ashen, eyes wide, I sat like a bird locked in the eyes of a snake.

She loves him. Unconditionally. Not the reaction Edward was probably expecting, but what he was likely hoping for. And Bella has her own god-like powers as well; namely, the power of unconditional love. Again, he Believes she really loves him, without reservation. Which motivates -- persuades -- Edward to Change, which in turn propels him forward so he can choose to take the next step -- Commitment. First the Change: His lovely eyes seem to glow with rash excitement. Then, as the seconds passed, they dimmed. His expression slowly folded into a mask of ancient sadness.

Then, the Commitment:

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“Don’t be afraid,” he murmured, his velvet voice unintentionally seductive. “I promise…” He hesitated. “I swear not to hurt you.” He seemed more concerned with convincing himself than me.

“Don’t be afraid,” he repeats (a common thing for an angel to say, repeatedly). Edward has made his choice. He has committed: “Please forgive me,” he said formally. “I can control myself. You caught me off guard. But I’m on my best behavior now.”

And Edward remains on his best behavior from that point on. Change is difficult for vampires -- for anyone, really, which is the point -- but he has changed, permanently, because of his Commitment. No longer will he present a threat to Bella... at least, in quite that way. Edward had stopped drinking human blood when the guilt becomes too much to bear, and that restraint gives him the strength and the willpower he needs to resist later temptation, including resisting Bella’s blood... and her body. Which for Edward, at least, are both tangled together. “And for you?” “Never.” The word hung there for a moment in the warm breeze.

So with their restraint, Bella and Edward are virginal, and what they can offer to one another is all of themselves, unreservedly, unshared, and unconstrained. Someday. Bella makes an aside here that is very important, and shows just how far she has come in the Wisdom Cycle.

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“Tell me why you ran from me before.” His smile faded. “You know why.” “No, I mean, exactly what did I do wrong? I’ll have to be on my guard, you see, so I better start learning what I shouldn’t do... “You didn’t do anything wrong, Bella. It was my fault.” “But I want to help, if I can, to not make this harder for you.”

Making a commitment is similar to taking on a responsibility. The Wisdom Cycle helps people learn how to become more responsible -- over the things they actually are responsible for. Because they are wise enough to see the difference. The key is to figure out what you can (or cannot) do about harmful things, and try to fix what you can -- and then let go of the rest. Which often, perhaps surprisingly, does not include figuring out who is at “fault” for this or that. Unless you’re Chief Swan, out doing his job for the good people of Forks, figuring out whose fault it is usually won’t help very much. What will help is figuring out what can be done about it. That’s what Bella is doing. Edward doesn’t want her to worry, but she isn’t concerned about “fault” -- she just wants to make things better. Which is a wise way to handle problems in life. “I’m new at this; you’re resurrecting the human in me, and everything feels stronger because it’s fresh... For almost ninety years I’ve walked among my kind, and yours… all the time thinking I was complete in myself, not realizing what I was seeking. And not finding anything, because you weren’t alive yet.”

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Like Bella, Edward is also a seeker of truth, yet the main thing he has been seeking in his life all along... was Bella. His other half. “The One.” Many young people feel like this; incomplete, yet unsure what is missing. Yet -- at least for some -- the problem isn’t really a “what,” so much as a “who.” Or at least, so it will seem to them one day. Now that he has found her, the question is: Is he worthy of her? Young people are really good at finding the smallest differences in others, and figuring out if is a problem -quickly and (usually) accurately. These skills are needed, because they need to find someone they can live and work together with (hopefully) forever. You can see this with Bella, who notices all sorts of odd things about Mike, the first time she meets him, which echo later in his actions, underscoring why no one is on “Team Mike.” Except perhaps Jessica. Regardless of who you are, the best way to find “The One” is not by sitting around waiting for them to show up. The best way to find them is to become the best person you can be (whatever that means for you). That way, when you meet the best person in the world (for you)... you match. In who you are, where you are going, and how you plan to get there. Certainly, there are all types of marriages (these days, perhaps, more than ever), since marriage is largely what you choose to make it. And if any type of marriage makes them happy then it was the right choice. For them.

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But the Twilight Saga doesn’t really focus on all types of relationships. It focuses, instead, on how, for some people, there really is just One. And how, in those relationships, they don’t only live with each other, they save each other. Bella is the hero because she saves herself and Edward -- along with Jacob, the Cullens, and the entire immortal world. How she does that is what Twilight is about (in one sense, at least). But before saving anyone, the first thing a hero does -and Bella does throughout Twilight -- is Learn that, despite whatever ways they are trapped, they can save themselves, and others. That they can choose to be saved. So that night, on their “honeymoon” of sorts, Bella asks Edward several questions about life, and gets some weighty answers in response. To know why things are the way they are, it helps to go back to the beginning. “I’ve decided what I want to do,” I told him. “I want to hear more about you.” “Ask me anything.” I sifted through my questions for the most vital. “Why do you do it?” I said. “I still don’t understand how you can work so hard to resist what you… are. Please don’t misunderstand, of course I’m glad that you do. I just don’t see why you would bother in the first place.” “You see, just because we’ve been… dealt a certain hand… it doesn’t mean that we can’t choose to rise above -- to conquer the boundaries of a destiny that none of us wanted. To try to retain whatever essential humanity we can...” “So where did it all start? I mean, Carlisle changed you, and then someone must have changed him, and so on…”

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“Well, where did you come from? Evolution? Creation? Couldn’t we have evolved in the same way as other species, predator and prey? Or, if you don’t believe that all this world could have just happened on its own, which is hard for me to accept myself, is it so hard to believe that the same force that created the delicate angelfish with the shark, the baby seal and the killer whale, could create both our kinds together?” “Let me get this straight -- I’m the baby seal, right?”

Eventually, though, Bella has more immediate concerns: “Do you have any more questions?” “Only a million or two.” “We have tomorrow, and the next day, and the next…” he reminded me. I smiled, euphoric at the thought. “Are you sure you won’t vanish in the morning?” I wanted this to be certain. “You are mythical, after all.” “I won’t leave you.” His voice had the seal of a promise in it. “One more, then, tonight…” And I blushed. The darkness was no help -- I’m sure he could feel the sudden warmth under my skin. “What is it?”

Several questions arise. First, Bella wants/needs to Learn more, and has a specific question to be answered. Second, is Edward committed enough to stick around until they are answered? For now at least, the answer is yes. And third... Well, it is their symbolic honeymoon, after all: “No, forget it. I changed my mind.” “Bella, you can ask me anything.” I didn’t answer, and he groaned. “I keep thinking it will get less frustrating, not hearing your thoughts. But it just gets worse and worse.” “I’m glad you can’t read my thoughts. It’s bad enough that you eavesdrop on my sleep-talking.” “Please?” His voice was so persuasive, so impossible to resist.

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I shook my head. “If you don’t tell me, I’ll just assume it‘s something much worse than it is,” he threatened darkly.

But first, it appears they need to work out their communication issues. It sounds kind of weird to talk about communication techniques in a vampire book. But the story is also about relationships, and how they are formed, and how that foundation affects the relationship that follows. Because when communication is not there, people often assume that things are “much worse” than they actually are, whether they are mind-reading vampires or not. So communication is actually very important to Bella and Edward’s story, because communicating clearly is not just part of a relationship; communication is the relationship. In other words, being able to communicate, verbally and otherwise, concerning challenges and choices, and the quality of life that communication yields is what a relationship actually is. And yet, no matter how much someone loves you, they still can’t read your mind. So you have to communicate. This could be an important symbolic reason why Edward can’t hear Bella’s thoughts, and since he is going through so much anguish to reveal this principle to us, the least we can do is remember this point: Talk. Things. Over. So Bella, despite her background -- her once-absent father, her flighty mother, her work to keep the house up, her resulting lack of many/good friends, and her having no prior romantic life -- is going to need to learn how to

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express herself. Clearly. To a man. The man in her life. And to ask the questions she needs to know, about... everything. So, for now, at first, her questions are... halting. “Please?” Again, that pleading voice. “Well,” I began, glad that he couldn’t see my face. “Yes?” “You said that Rosalie and Emmett will get married soon… Is that… marriage… the same as it is for humans?” He laughed in earnest now, understanding. “Is that what you’re getting at?”

Bella’s communicative approach is effective, even if it is stilted at times. As it turns out, you don’t have to be a wonderful communicator to build wonderful relationships. But you do have to communicate. This particular topic will be revisited again. Which is good. Because Edward has his own problems communicating. So the answer for Edward seems to be to communicate more, and over time, better: More truthfully. More sensitively. More completely. And (we hope) more forthrightly. He certainly is trying, despite 100 years of not-communicating with others. Purposely. Including humans. And girls. (Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett don’t count as either.) So once again, Bella and Edward find themselves in the same boat. And, despite the difficulties of his past, when he sets his mind to it, Edward can be pretty communicative.

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“Apparently none of the girls here are good-looking enough for him.” -Jessica “Well, you’re too good for them all, anyway.” -Charlie Like Bella, Charlie has similar issues communicating with the opposite sex, including Bella. Meanwhile, since moving to Forks, Bella is having a crash course on how to communicate... with men. And Charlie, however laid back, is more challenging to talk with than she may have first imagined. Although

his

mind

works

(much)

slowly

than

Edward’s, he is, occasionally, difficult for Bella to predict. Like the night before the visit to the Meadow, when Chief Swan seemed to slip into police detective mode, quizzing Bella about the boys in town. He had noticed that she had expressed no interest in the local boys -- to him anyway -which he views with some suspicion. Much as Jessica had reacted to Edward’s lack of interest in the local girls (especially herself). Ironically, they were both correct. Apparently, Charlie is more sensitive than some readers give him credit for. He observes that Bella is really “keyed up,” commenting (like Jessica) that apparently no one around town is good enough for them. And he cleverly removes her battery cables, just in case. Yet, through it all, Charlie often seems insensitive because he doesn’t communicate as well -- or as much -- as he could. Which is a problem. Maybe Renee left Forks not so much because of the weather, or the small town life, but because of the lack of communication with/from her new husband. By the end of Breaking Dawn, however, he seems to have learned from living with Bella -- including simply valuing communication more (especially after the events of New Moon). So Charlie seems to communicate (much) better with Sue later on, both verbally and through even just a glance.

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Edward explains to Bella why he needs to be careful so as not to harm her, and then, haltingly himself -- casually, so you know it’s a big deal -- he asks: He seemed to deliberate for a moment. “I’m curious now, though,” he said, his voice light again. “Have you ever… ?” He trailed off suggestively. “Of course not.” I flushed. “I told you I’ve never felt like this about anyone before, not even close.” “I know. It’s just that I know other people’s thoughts. I know love and lust don’t always keep the same company.” “They do for me. Now, anyway, that they exist for me at all,” I sighed. “That’s nice. We have that one thing in common, at least.” He sounded satisfied.

And that is their entire old-boyfriend/old-girlfriend discussion, right there. The most painful, humiliating, and inevitable conversation of every couples’ life. In 60 seconds. And not just for Edward. Someday everyone has that conversation. So, it appears that the shorter that conversation, the easier it is. And Bella astutely gets to the heart of the matter. “Your human instincts…” I began. He waited. “Well, do you find me attractive, in that way, at all?” He laughed and lightly rumpled my nearly dry hair. “I may not be a human, but I am a man,” he assured me.

And so, their symbolic wedding and honeymoon concludes, with her committed guardian angel watching over her, loving her, while she sleeps (very) safely in his arms.

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16. The Clearing Skipping ahead: As for most heroes, Bella and Edward’s Commitments to one another are soon tested. First, they go to heaven, or uh, the Cullen’s house, to face his parents and family. It’s white. There’s lovely music. It goes higher and higher. And angels live there. Bella learns about their (soon to be, her) family, from their creation up to the present. Second, they face Chief Swan. To “play ball.” It’s a very different experience. More human. More... earthly, perhaps. And third, they go to hell. So to speak. At least it’s considerably “hotter,” more dangerous, than the world they’ve been living in. Bella has met humans, and angels. And now it’s time to meet the demons. So they go to the Clearing. It’s a very different setting than

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the Meadow. Why? The Meadow is a heavenly place of unity. Many options are available to those who are willing to work together, in peace. All can achieve -- can “win” -- through cooperation, understanding, and love. But the Clearing is a playing field. And later, a battlefield. A place of competition. Of hierarchies. Of division. Of levels. Of only two possibilities: Win. Or lose. And in order to “win,” someone else has to lose. Bella and Edward have been trying to see themselves more clearly since the start of Twilight. Both found it easy to accept their failings; seeing their strengths, abilities, and inherent goodness clearly, though, has continued to elude them. Probably because they just thought they were acting weird, like everyone else (the selfish ones) seemed to think of them. Perhaps now, in the Clearing, they will finally begin to see who they truly are. Alice had left her position and was running, or dancing, toward us. She hurtled to a fluid stop at our feet. “It’s time,” she announced. As soon as she spoke, a deep rumble of thunder shook the forest beyond us, and then crashed westward toward town. “Eerie, isn’t it?” Emmett said with easy familiarity, winking at me. “Let’s go.”

When Alice announces, “It’s time,” it is time: For Bella to be put through the culminating test of Twilight. Has she Learned enough to overcome the challenges she faces? To fully Commit to her new path?

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Esme asks, “Shall we go down?” And she escorts Bella down from the symbolic heavens the Cullens normally inhabit to the playing field of life, of the common world, which is larger and more challenging than Bella had imagined it would be. Esme tells Bella of her own fall, when she had jumped from a cliff after the death of her baby. So, why the fall? Perhaps it was because Esme (we learn elsewhere) was married to an abusive husband. He was not her “One,” and so here is, perhaps, a warning metaphor. Marriage is not to be undertaken lightly, as it can literally be a matter of life and death, as with her poor, lost child. We will see this pattern again in the Twilight Saga. After her “death,” Carlisle saves her, and Esme enters into immortality. “Edward just said you f-fell,” I stammered. “Always the gentleman.” She smiled. “Edward was the first of my new sons. I’ve always thought of him that way, even though he’s older than I, in one way at least.” She smiled at me warmly. “That’s why I’m so happy that he’s found you, dear.” The endearment sounded very natural on her lips. “He’s been the odd man out for far too long; it’s hurt me to see him alone.” “You don’t mind, then?” I asked, hesitant again. “That I’m… all wrong for him?” “No.” She was thoughtful. “You’re what he wants. It will work out, somehow.”

Esme extends the same kindness -- and the same wording -that Bella did when she spoke of her own mother’s too-young new man, Phil. She is judged as she has judged others before.

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Teams are already formed, and for now, Esme and Bella are together, on a team of their own. It appears that Bella has already gained a new mother, and Esme, another daughter. Bella watches the Cullens play a baseball game -- a very normal, human thing -- yet here it is played by the gods; it isn’t Mount Olympus, but they still create thunder. “I am a little disappointed,” I teased. “Why?” he asked, puzzled. “Well, it would be nice if I could find just one thing you didn’t do better than everyone else on the planet.” He flashed his special crooked smile, leaving me breathless. “I’m up,” he said, heading for the plate.

Indeed, Edward is “up,” and as he steps up to the plate, he is about to be tested also. Bella worries he will be hurt, but Esme calmly states that they are “safe.” Until Alice gasps. “I had the perspective wrong before,” she admits. A common problem. The world of the vampires approaches, to meet Bella. And it is then that Edward realizes that while he and Bella were so careful not to expose the vampires to other humans, they forgot to not expose the human to other vampires. And Bella, a shining example of how to live well in the Wisdom Cycle, is the Change-agent for everyone she comes in contact with. She is the real danger, not the Cullens, who have been blending in with human society for decades. Bella, as we recall, doesn’t blend quite so well. Heroes usually don’t.

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“I’m sorry, Bella,” he muttered fiercely. “It was stupid, irresponsible, to expose you like this. I’m so sorry.”

Edward is sorry. And Bella apparently either forgives Edward immediately, or never held it against him in the first place. Either way, the Consequences will still need to be faced. It is one thing to apologize, and another to deal with the consequences which follow the choices we made, including our mistakes. No one makes those choices for us. They may encourage us. But in the end, we choose -- however well or poorly -- for ourselves, and the consequences -- however beneficial or harmful -- follow. You can choose whether to expose your hand to flame, but you can’t choose whether you will be burned or not (a metaphor which will arise soon); the Effects just happen. The Cullens will have to respond to this Change, and reform their teams. Or team, rather, if Bella is to survive the night. “It’s time” for Bella to become a player, not merely a viewer on the sidelines any longer. The vampire world will not take kindly to having their Worldview disturbed by this... human. This girl. Bella. It is a curious thing how some people will attack, fight, and destroy, simply to preserve their Worldviews. Especially obviously inaccurate Worldviews, which lead to obviously harmful consequences. They will face anything rather than accept that they may have had their own “perspective wrong.”

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Bella is about to have her perspective adjusted. By seeing her first “real” vampires. What does she see? As they approached, I could see how different they were from the Cullens. Their walk was catlike, a gait that seemed constantly on the edge of shifting into a crouch. They dressed in the ordinary gear of backpackers: jeans and casual button-down shirts in heavy, weatherproof fabrics. The clothes were frayed, though, with wear, and they were barefoot. Both men had cropped hair, but the woman’s brilliant orange hair was filled with leaves and debris from the woods.

Vampires, regular vampires, are savage. Barely civilized. Wild, in the worst sense. They are homeless. Seemingly penniless, save for the clothes on their backs. They are covered in dirt, leaves and debris. They are on their guard, always, and they approach in a crouch, ready to attack, or to be attacked. Win, or lose. Their red eyes -- windows to the soul -- are “disturbing and sinister.” As the two groups cautiously converse, with the new coven trying to match Carlisle’s poise and human politeness, they talk about hunting ranges, and when they last fed. Little else. The possibility of actually having a permanent home apparently has never occurred to them. Ever. We see that normal vampires live like fugitives, outcasts, driven by humanity (and their unrelenting thirst) everywhere, except to a home to call their own. This seems like a pretty harmful Worldview. Hellish, in fact. So why aren’t they eager to take on a happier one? And Laurent does seem interested, at least. But James and Victoria will not take on a new Worldview. They’d die first.

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They are so driven by their impulses, their desires, that they have lost their will to choose a better life. So, however “normal” this coven of vampires may be, they have become inhuman, animals, demons. Monsters. How can you tell they are not in the Wisdom Cycle? Because when James, Victoria and Laurent confront their ignorance of the Cullens’ way of life, they didn’t humble themselves and really seek to Learn more. Instead they respond with the three F’s: Flight, Fight, and Flippant. James wants to fight for Bella, and begins his “game” immediately. Victoria is ready to take flight at the slightest premonition of danger. As for Laurent: “What’s this?... But she’s human...” The words were not at all aggressive, merely astounded. “Of course, we will not harm the human girl. We won’t hunt in your range, as I said.”

Laurent is acting like everything is just fine and dandy with whatever he chooses, even though he is not actually in charge of anything, understands very little about what is happening, and seems oblivious to the serious Effects already unfolding. Later, this same flippant disregard for Cause and Effect will cost him his life. Carlisle, though, has already reformed their new team: “I’m Carlisle. This is my family, Emmett and Jasper, Rosalie, Esme and Alice, Edward and Bella.”

And then the wind Changes, and James scents his new prey. Bella.

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17. Forks “Let’s just look at our options for a minute,” Alice coaxed. The car slowed again, more noticeably, and then suddenly we screeched to a stop on the shoulder of the highway. I flew against the harness, and then slammed back into the seat. “There are no options,” Edward hissed.

Of the three regular vampires, only Laurent is willing to Commit -- again -- to not hunt in the Cullens’ territories. For now. James and Victoria are already stalking Bella. Edward, Alice, and Emmett speed Bella away in the Jeep at over 100 miles per hour -- which is fast enough to keep James at a distance, but not fast enough to escape him entirely. At least they are creating a wider space between stimulus and response, which should give them more time to think. As they speed down the highway away from Forks -- where there are many forks to the choices that can be made --

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Edward sums up the reason for his panic in four words: “There are no options.” That usually is the reason for panic: Having no options. Being “trapped.” Or rather, seemingly being trapped. But there is always another way. It may be more difficult, or challenging, or unpleasant. It may require hard work, humility, or patience. It may be limited, or take more Learning, or may not be something you’ve done before or even knew you could. But there is always another way. You just don’t know what it is. Yet. The Cullens haven’t been in this situation before, or even thought it could happen, so they’re ignorant about how to handle things. How people confront their ignorance when it arises is a revealing thing. But in this case, the A-student Cullen children are getting the Three F’s: • Fight: Emmett. “He’s no match for us, Edward. He won’t be able to touch her.” • Flight: Edward. As he speeds away ever faster, panicking, he exclaims, “There - is - no -other - option!” • Flippant: Alice. She says that James ”doesn’t know where...” Bella lives, so she’d be safe there. Or, she would have said that, if Edward hadn’t interrupted her with his panic attack. None of those reactions are a good choice, as they are all based in fear -- the emotions about the situation, not the

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situation itself. This is a problem with labeling yourself as something lesser than what you really are: An animal, a monster, an idiot, a jerk, a brat, or whatever. It limits your choices. Especially when confronting your ignorance. Labels lead people to assume they can’t deal with a new problem. Even though they got themselves to that point. Even though they can act in any way they choose now. Even though they will deal with everything else in their lives, in the future, so long as it doesn’t inspire their choice of having an emotional panic attack. In other words, they assume that the Cause and Effect principle of life (suddenly) does not exist and that something in their life just magically appeared, trapping them. But life isn’t actually magical, thank goodness. Not in that sense anyway. There is Cause and Effect, so that “something” didn’t come from nothing. And that means that if this effect had a cause, then you can Cause a new Effect -- to Change it into something else. In reality, everyone has at least five options available in any given situation, no matter how surprising it is, or how hard it may be, or whose fault it is, or how emotional they feel. But first, here are some non-options, that many people seem to think are feasible and effective Approaches to the challenges they face, yet are rooted in an ignorance of Cause and Effect. Despite their inevitably harmful consequences, they are all -unfortunately -- extremely common:

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• The three F’s: Fight, Flight, or be Flippant. You are not an animal; you have the ability to find solutions. If you can get into it, you can probably get out, too. • Complain. Alerts the villains that you have no plans to avoid or deal effectively with hardships. Like them. • Worry. Anxiety accomplishes nothing. In and of itself, simply worrying is not a responsible Approach. • Await your “doom.” A self-fulfilling prophecy if there ever was one. And a very harmful one, at that. None of the above are very helpful options. Here, then, are the five, real options, which actually can help: 1. Change the situation itself. Look at the Causes. Change those. Perhaps that will change the Consequences, whoever’s fault they may be. 2. Change yourself. Learn, or gain the ability, to deal with the problem itself. 3. Work with others. If it really is impossible to handle the situation on your own, ask others for help. 4. Be patient. Everything is always changing; perhaps in time, the situation will change as well, for the better. 5. Find another situation. Avoid the situation. Leave. Move on. Do an “end run.” Start over, on another path. Since all four of them in the Jeep don’t know what to do, that helps put Bella on equal footing with the vampires. Yet as Bella explains her plan to go home, and then to Phoenix,

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she seems to be the only one who has gone through enough of the Wisdom Cycle to be able to think beyond the limits (milieu) that James’ coven has tried to impose on the situation: James is the bully; the Cullens are the victims; the end. Perhaps it is easier for Bella because she already is an outsider within the vampire world. Regardless, she has been becoming more a vampire every day since she came to Forks. “She’s diabolical,” Emmett chuckles. Bella decides first to try option one, to change the situation itself, by leading James astray. She has Learned about the vampire world, Believes she can become a part of it, has Changed to do just that, and is ready to Commit: “Fifteen minutes,” he warned under his breath. “I can do this.” I sniffled. My tears had given me an inspiration. I stopped on the porch and took hold of his face in my hands. I looked fiercely into his eyes. “I love you,” I said in a low, intense voice. “I will always love you, no matter what happens now.” “Nothing is going to happen to you, Bella,” he said just as fiercely. “Just follow the plan, okay? Keep Charlie safe for me. He’s not going to like me very much after this, and I want to have the chance to apologize later.” “Get inside, Bella. We have to hurry.” His voice was urgent. “One more thing,” I whispered passionately. “Don’t listen to another word I say tonight!” He was leaning in, and so all I had to do was stretch up on my toes to kiss his surprised, frozen lips with as much force as I was capable of. Then I turned and kicked the door open. “Go away, Edward!” I yelled at him, running inside and slamming the door shut in his still-shocked face.

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Once committed, Bella can see things more clearly, including how to handle things with Charlie. It works, just as she’d planned, and soon the startled Charlie is left behind as she slams the door on him as well, while James is about to set off into the woods looking for Bella while she actually drives to Phoenix. There is more to Bella’s abilities as she approaches the final test and climax of Twilight. Like all great heroes, Bella has learned Cause and Effect. She has Learned how men and /or vampires think and act. And with Alice’s support, she can Cause an Effect that will change her world. As things unravel in Bella’s world, many of the patterns in her life come undone, or are reversed entirely. But not all are accidental. For example, there are the excuses Bella tells her father about leaving Forks: “I do like him — that’s the problem. I can’t do this anymore! I can’t put down any more roots here! I don’t want to end up trapped in this stupid, boring town like Mom! I’m not going to make the same dumb mistake she did. I hate it -- I can’t stay here another minute!”

Bella could have, truthfully, said the opposite: I do love him — that’s not the problem. I can do this forever! I can put down many more roots here! I want to end up freed by living in this wonderful, fascinating town like you, Dad! I’m going to make the same good decision you did. I love it -- I could stay here forever!

But in another reversal, for once, Bella’s lies are believed. Solutions to the challenges we face, in fact, are often so obvious that they can be difficult to see. For instance, often

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the problem boils down to how you phrase things. Which is Bella’s problem in this case: “What could I say to Charlie?” And then, from those options, “What would be the best things to say to Charlie?” The reason that good solutions are often simple -- yet hard to see -- is because they usually involve two steps. The first step is identifying what is going on. There may be a lot going on in a given problem, but the important things to focus on are usually patterns of some kind. “It’s been like this; it is still like this; it is likely to be like this in the future.” The second step is understanding the principles that are under those patterns. Causing them. And then recognizing what other principles can be used to Change those patterns. And that’s wisdom. Understanding the situation, and knowing what principles are affecting that situation. Learning these principles helps in recognizing the Cause -which Edward is really good at -- and see the Effect -- which Alice is really good at. Unfortunately, neither is good at the other. Tragically so. Fortunately, Bella is good at tying the two together. So then, once you know, you just have to do it. Which may sound hard. But when you truly know what to do, and how to do it, that gets rid of the stress. No more panic, because you know, like all the other things you know how to do in your life. It’s obvious. It’s clear. It’s easy. This is one of the purposes of literature, of movies, of

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stories in general. They provide sample problems to Learn from. Some say that when you face a difficult decision to create a “mental sandbox,” an imaginary, theoretical situation, away from all your fears of what might happen if you did this or that, so you can focus on what really would be the best choice for you and yours. The world of stories help provide those mental sandboxes, including for problems that haven’t even come up in your life. They provide lots (and lots) of sample problems where we can consider what the best options are, away from the consequences that we may be so afraid of that it’s hard to realistically even consider the problem. Figuring out what is going on and what you can do about it can be a challenge, but once a person has the humility to see what they don’t see -- to accept that they haven’t seen as clearly as they could or should have -- the options should be right in front of them. Then, it’s just a matter of picking the best one. Since Change is always happening, and we’re always doing something, in a way, life is often more a question of choosing the right fork in the path, as it is anything else. Obvious, clear, easy. The choices we make may be hard, but if the Effect of the Cause we are creating will help yield a lasting (and hopefully satisfying) peace, then it probably is the best decision.

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18. She’s with us “Bella, it’s going to be all right.” “But it won’t be all right when I’m not with you,” I whispered. “We’ll be together again in a few days,” he said, tightening his arm around me. “Don’t forget that this was your idea.” “It was the best idea -- of course it was mine.” His answering smile was bleak and disappeared immediately. “Why did this happen?” I asked, my voice catching. “Why me?”

While driving to the Cullen’s home, there is a bit of humor, which in Twilight, is usually a smoke-screen to cover up a major thematic point, especially those that are being stated, clearly, right out. Bella asks a question that everyone seems to ask at one point or another in their lives: “Why me?” Responsibility is not the same thing as “fault.” Fault is for courts of law and other disciplinarians; in the rest of life, just because something was someone else’s fault, doesn’t change

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how it impacts your life. Which is your responsibility. So, when people ask “why me,” they often aren’t really asking why this circumstance actually arose -- which would actually be a really good question to find the answer to. Instead, people are usually asking why God/fate/luck/the World did this thing to them, because it is so unfair. Yet in most situations, figuring out what is “fair” or “unfair” will help you even less than figuring out whose fault it is. “Fair“ and “fault” are often a waste of time. Better questions to ask -- in situations going poorly for you, whether you are the direct cause or not -- are whether you can do something about it? Whether you should? And how to do it? Not only are these questions easier to answer, the answers are often very helpful. Generally, the simple reason “why” hardships arise is because you were not wise enough to prevent it from becoming a problem. And unless every other person is facing the same exact problem in the same exact way, then there is a better way to approach the situation than what you’ve done in the past. Taking that into account -- that you could do that, instead -- means you could avoid/prevent/overcome the problem altogether. Easier said than done, perhaps, but a comfort (and a goal) nonetheless. Whether something is a problem for others or not doesn’t change the fact that this is your life, and you should overcome the challenge before it becomes a problem (or, a worse problem) for you.

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For example, the Cullens should have realized that instead of focusing on protecting themselves, they should have focused on protecting Bella.. from someone other than the one vampire who loved her truly, madly, and deeply. Even though it is James’ “fault” that Bella is now in danger, it was still the Cullens’ (and Bella’s) responsibility to make sure a situation like that never came up. Beforehand. Because once the Cullens realized that James & company were on their way, it was too late to take her away as her scent would linger and draw the other vampires after. So, setting aside all issues of fault or fairness, whether you are the direct cause of a particular challenge or not -- you are there. It is still your life. And how it goes will be up to you. “What’s this?” Laurent exclaimed in open surprise. Neither James nor Edward relaxed their aggressive poses. James feinted slightly to the side, and Edward shifted in response. “She’s with us.” Carlisle’s firm rebuff was directed toward James. Laurent seemed to catch my scent less powerfully than James, but awareness now dawned on his face. “You brought a snack?” he asked, his expression incredulous as he took an involuntary step forward. Edward snarled even more ferociously, harshly, his lip curling high above his glistening,bared teeth. Laurent stepped back again. “I said she’s with us,” Carlisle corrected in a hard voice. “But she’s human,” Laurent protested... “It appears we have a lot to learn about each other.” “Indeed.”

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The Cullens, and James’ coven will, “indeed,” learn a great deal about each other before the Twilight Saga is over. To change the harmful into the beneficial, you have to make it that way. It takes wisdom -- including wisdom enough to expend the time, effort, and resources necessary -- but it can be done, in almost every situation. And this is exactly what Bella is going to do in this situation. In Twilight, Bella’s main goal is to Learn: To gain wisdom about living life well, about vampires, about how to love (and be loved by) them -- and how to overcome their destructive natures. Bella and Edward don’t want to harm anyone. But bad people often try to harm, or even destroy, the good. Why? Partly, this is because the bad want to support their arrogant pride -- which is typically based in nothing they’ve actually done that they could realistically feel proud about. They also usually want to hide from the harmful effects they cause. When they see good people, their willful ignorance and foolishness is revealed. Instead of Learning, Believing, Changing, and Committing to do better themselves -- they “commit” to not change or believe that the “real world” can work in ways other than poorly, badly, and harmfully. Indeed, rather than saying that things are “good” or “bad,” it may be more accurate (and helpful) to look at them from the perspective of Cause and Effect, and instead think of Effects as “beneficial” or “harmful” for all involved.

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A villain will call destroying a hero “good,” because then their Worldview is sustained; they have removed the evidence of their own ignorance, and they feel like they “proved” to themselves, and to others (especially people trying to live beneficially) that life can only go harmfully (because they made sure the good were harmed). This is the real reason why James and Victoria want to destroy Bella (and the Cullens): Because the Cullens’ beneficial Worldview, Approaches, Behaviors and Consequences reveal the foolishness of their own lives. Confronting one’s own ignorance (and resulting mistakes) (and wasted opportunities) can be a painful thing. So it takes humility to accept that pain, and face the reality of what is truly possible in life. Yet, when you do that, the pain immediately begins to go away; arrogantly avoiding that realization simply prolongs the pain, no matter how much you try to ignore it. Better to humbly accept your mistakes, and end that pain (and any on-going harm), so you can turn to wisdom instead, and find path that lead to greater satisfaction and joy in life. But James is never going to choose that. This is why learning to overcome the harmful is an important part of becoming wise. And since he insists on affecting Bella’s life for ill, she will have to look at her Five Options. An important part of learning to live wisely and beneficially is to defend and protect those you love. It will take until the end of Breaking Dawn for Bella to learn how to fully

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overcome the harmful in her life, but she will learn. Starting now. To overcome this particular problem, she will need to do each of the Five Options: 1. Change the situation: Leave Forks for Phoenix, and mislead James. 2. Change yourself: Learn to trap vampires, instead of the other way around. 3. Get help: Enlist all of the Cullens -- and James -- in her scheme to trap him. 4. Be patient: In Phoenix, waiting for James’ and Victoria’s plans to become clear. 5. Leave: Get away from Forks, and then from Alice and Jasper -- and get to the ballet studio to spring her trap. When Edward and Bella arrive at the Cullen’s, Carlisle is telling Laurent that he will need to make a choice. Being the Flippant one, he takes the easiest way out in the given situation, and goes to Denali, where he can take further advantage of their hospitality. And wealth. And affection. If he had made this decision with more understanding and Commitment, perhaps he would have stayed in Alaska, instead of bailing on being a vegetarian and inciting all the death, violence, and woe that will follow this quick decision. “Go in peace,” Carlisle wishes him. It’s too bad that Laurent hadn’t gone through the Wisdom Cycle enough to do just that. And it’s too bad that the Cullens just stand there while

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they watch Laurent walk out their door, off to ruin their cousin Irina’s soon-to-be very-short life, nearly killing Bella as well, inciting a werewolf explosion, and causing a civil war that will change the Vampire World forever. Bye, Laurent. As said before, everyone is ignorant of different things, and none of the Cullens (including Alice) can foresee the calamities that will come from Laurent walking out their front door. And the things people can’t see, they won’t see. And vice versa. Some problems only become apparent after they explode in our faces. Which can make life... challenging. All the more reason to gain wisdom while you still can, and make those kinds of surprises very few and far between. Edward spells out Bella’s plan to Carlisle: “I guess there’s no other choice,” Carlisle agreed, his face grim.” Of course, there is another choice. Lots of them. But, again, it will be up to Bella to find the best one. But first, all the old patterns are broken. The Cullens change their normal, expected places, choosing different vehicles to add to their mixed-up patterns, and even Bella and Esme swap their (ill-fitting) clothing too. Then, after a too-quick kiss and a “curiously dead” look from Edward, and one last “Be safe” -- this time from Esme -- the Cullens speed away into the night. And before Alice asks to carry Bella -- another break in the normal patterns -- Jasper, of all people, assures Bella by telling her, of all things:

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“You’re wrong, you know,” he said quietly. “What?” I gasped. “I can feel what you’re feeling now -- and you are worth it.” “I’m not,” I mumbled. “If anything happens to them, it will be for nothing.” “You’re wrong,” he repeated, smiling kindly at me.

For once, in another broken pattern, Bella is not humble enough -- humble enough to accept what Jasper is telling her, humble enough to accept her own value. Compliments can be hard to take. Accepting them honestly and graciously can take humility. So far, everything has happened in Twilight has pretty much happened according to what Bella had planned. Through her Learning about Cause and Effect, she made them happen, taking advantage of every opportunity that presented itself. She wanted to get to know the Cullens, so she did. She wanted to be with Edward, so she is. She wanted to join with them in the vampire world, and so she has. But now the patterns are being broken -- which is convenient for us, because it helps to show and underscore the underlying principles. Not so convenient for Bella. But it will be informative for her, at least (eventually). Perhaps Carlisle’s “grim” feeling behind his response to her plan should have been a tip off; another pattern that will be broken is that this time, Bella’s plans will not work. Namely, that James and Victoria evade the Cullens’ every move.

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So Bella (in a sense), recognizes the pattern of broken patterns, and comes up with a new plan accordingly. Bella travels to arid Phoenix. Alice foresees the Effects that James and others Cause. James calls Bella. And Bella sets a trap. It is unclear how much Bella does next on purpose, or not. But what actually happens is that it quickly becomes clear that James will wait out the Cullens, attacking those Bella cares about, including her soon-to-arrive mother, until Bella is left alone and defenseless. Unfortunately, Alice and Jasper wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t see this coming, so they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t see this coming. Complicating things is that, as a human, Bella simply cannot fight James effectively alone. And that he claims he has kidnapped her mother, which she cannot easily disprove. So she applies various combinations of the principles she learned about how vampires live, fight, and die, along with her understanding of the current situation -- where everyone is in Phoenix and what Jamesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; plans are. Then, applying the Five Options, she finds a solution. And it works. Are there other possible solutions besides what she does? Yes; there are always other options. But what she actually does is trap James, and the Cullens, leading them to do what she wants and needs, including preserving the lives of everyone she loves. And putting James out of his evil misery. First, Bella learns how vampires are created. How they fight. And how they are killed.

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Second, she tells Alice and Jasper that James is going to the ballet studio at “Fifty-eighth Street and Cactus.” Third, Bella tells James that she will meet him there. Fourth, she gives a note to Alice that says she is going to the Ballet Studio. Fifth, she gets her money together for her transportation, and figures out a way to escape Jasper and Alice(!). Sixth, when she gets to the studio, she encourages James to monologue for a while, which gives the Cullens enough time to (a) disembark the airplane and assemble, (b) figure out where Bella went, (c) steal a car, and (d) attack James. There are several things that could unexpectedly go wrong, and a few that actually do. Primarily, James is worse than Bella had planned for. This is a common miscalculation made by the good and virtuous -- underestimating their enemies’ willingness to do evil. Everything such people do serves to add up to a series of excuses for (and more opportunities) to do more evil. She’ll learn, and won’t make that mistake again. But with James holding her mother hostage, Bella decides its time to act. And, of course, some things go unexpectedly well. First, Renee isn’t being held captive after all. Next, there is the tormenting and torturing of Bella. It takes up time, allowing the Cullens to arrive. So, in one sense at least, that’s a good thing. It is a sacrifice that she willingly makes (her injuries -- scalp, wrist, feet and side -- may mirror those Jesus suffered, also believed to be worthwhile.)

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Another good thing is that Bella learns about Aliceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s origins, which will help her future sister-in-law find peace. Further, James bites her. It hurts, but Bella wants to become a vampire, to help her be safer and no longer endanger those she loves by remaining human. And finally, just when Bella accepts they wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get to her in time, the Cullens arrive, helping Bella, ending Jamesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; painful life, and destroying any evidence that would endanger them all at the Ballet Studio. In any case, once again, Bella gets exactly what she wanted. Except to become a vampire. But close enough. For now. Bella has proven that she can live within the vampire world. Her Commitment, the last stage of the Wisdom Cycle, is complete. And then what?

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19. And Then What? Now that Bella has completed the Wisdom Cycle, it’s time for another round, another circuit, to reach a higher level. Is she ready? Here are the Keys: Humility: “Don’t I taste as good as I smell?” I smiled in response. That hurt my face. “Even better -- better than I’d imagined.” “I’m sorry,” I apologized. He raised his eyes to the ceiling. “Of all the things to apologize for.” “What should I apologize for?” “For very nearly taking yourself away from me forever.” “I’m sorry,” I apologized again.

Sacrifice: “I thought he had my mom.”

Gratitude: “Thank you, Edward.”

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Patience: “I’m not sure.” He looked away from my wondering eyes... I waited patiently for the rest.

Desire (to learn): “How did you do it?” I asked quietly. He knew what I meant at once.

So, even in this one conversation, Bella appears to be ready. She immediately tries to Learn more. But she and Edward both have troubles which prevent them from going into the next step, Believe. They haven’t Learned enough to overcome their fears. And fear is the opposite of Belief. There are a few jokes (smoke screen) about Bella’s unease over needles -- but not sadistic vampires --- and then a more serious point, Edward’s big, remaining fear: “Why are you here?” I asked. He stared at me, first confusion and then hurt touching his eyes. His brows pulled together as he frowned. “Do you want me to leave?”

Edward fears that Bella will reject him. Still. Remember that he lost his mother in a hospital, too, and he is applying the wrong patterns, in fear. So Bella will either leave him now, because she will be disturbed by the dangers of vampire life and culture. Or later, after she undergoes the pains of becoming a vampire. And she’s already had more than a taste of both.

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So, to prevent either of those from happening, Edward may think it’s preferable to leave her first. And that it would be the right thing to do. As is his wont, he has spent enormous amounts of time coming up with an “asinine” plan to that end -- to leave Bella by encouraging her to go to Jacksonville. Which, in turn, leads to Bella’s big, remaining fear: “Don’t leave me,” I cried, an irrational surge of panic flooding through me. I couldn’t let him go -- he might disappear from me again.

Bella’s fears, by comparison, are well-founded, because that is exactly what Edward plans to do. And will, in New Moon. In a recurring theme, Edward is like all the other men in the Twilight Saga: They get scared, start unnecessary conflict, and accidentally make things worse. More specifically, they often refuse to communicate. So they don’t Learn. So they can’t Believe, and instead fall into fear. Fear that usually makes things worse. And yet the solution to all this would be so simple -- to communicate: Clearly, honestly, sensitively, fully. I snorted. He opened his eyes in surprise. “That’s stupid. That’s like going to someone who’s just won the lottery, taking their money, and saying, ‘Look, let’s just go back to how things should be. It’s better that way.’ And I’m not buying it.” “I’m hardly a lottery prize,” he growled. “That’s right. You’re much better.” He rolled his eyes and set his lips. “Bella, we’re not having this discussion anymore. I refuse to damn you to an eternity of night and that’s the end of it.”

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What that means, in this instance, is Bella and Edward need to talk. Really communicate, together, with one another -- and barking at Bella doesn’t count. Why the return to communication issues? Because communication is the relationship. Once again, very serious problems in life boil down more or less to a problem with phrasing. To his credit, Edward tries. But it’s difficult to communicate effectively when you are nearly paralyzed with fear, a problem that vampires, in particular, seem subject to, although humans are hardly immune. Talking things through, in order to figure them out, is a good way to deal with emotional pain. Which they both have a great deal of. Edward explains to Bella that she doesn’t need to “remember” their cover story, because she can fake forgetfulness over the painful experience (a foreshadowing of what will happen during her actual transformation). Earlier in Twilight, at the restaurant, Bella says she won’t go into shock because she has “always been very good at repressing unpleasant things.” Note that while people generally don’t want to think about their painful experiences, simply pretending they didn’t happen is no way to overcome the emotional burden of a difficult experience. Whatever happens does actually happen, and simply pretending it didn’t, won’t prevent any Effects or solve arising challenges. Especially because painful memories have a way of just coming up. Over and over. And unlike

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memories of physical pain, which quickly fade, emotional pains are as real, vivid, and as painful later on as they were in the very moment -- and often, a good deal worse. It’s (much) better to face and work through them, and be able to move forward in your life wiser, unencumbered, and unafraid. But that discussion will have to wait. Renee is coming. Bella and her mother catch up, until Renee runs off to talk to Phil. Bella manages her mother intelligently. Nothing new for her, even though they’re talking about Edward for the first time. “I love you, Mom.” “I love you, too, Bella. Try to be more careful when you walk, honey, I don’t want to lose you.” Edward’s eyes stayed closed, but a wide grin flashed across his face.

Walk carefully. Good advice, especially metaphorically. Bella’s quest in Twilight is basically complete. Edward tells her, just as Jasper had in the hotel room: “You have nothing to worry about,” he promised, stroking my cheek with the lightest of touches. “Your only job now is to heal.”

And of course, both men are completely right. And completely wrong. Everything she set out to do has been completed, yet now she can see her goals more clearly -- through the wisdom gained through her circuits of the Wisdom Cycle. And Bella still wants more from her life. Ultimately, the role of heroes is to discover and reveal the

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Cause and Effect principle in life. They show us different ways to see it, and how to use that principle in our lives. Once that wisdom is gained (through the Wisdom Cycle), it doesn’t mean that life will be easy, trouble-free, or that people can live irresponsibly without harmful consequences. People will never know everything, and so they will, from time to time, confront their own ignorance. Sometimes in painful circumstances. If a person is seriously ignorant, then they may face a pretty miserable life. So, can a person live beyond the misery? Can a person overcome a world filled with hardship, woe, and death? Yes. And the heroes not only prove it -- they show us how to do it ourselves. Bella is not just showing Edward. She is showing us as well. “You can’t really believe that I would give in so easily,” he said with a sour edge to his mocking tone. “A girl can dream.” His eyebrows rose. “Is that what you dream about? Being a monster?” “Not exactly,” I said, frowning at his word choice. Monster, indeed. “Mostly I dream about being with you forever.” His expression changed, softened and saddened by the subtle ache in my voice. “Bella.” His fingers lightly traced the shape of my lips. “I will stay with you — isn’t that enough?” I smiled under his fingertips. “Enough for now.”

Monster? Or Angel? By watching how Bella overcomes her own circumstances -- including those he puts her through himself -- Edward will eventually Learn that who you are has

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less to do with the circumstances of your birth (or creation), than it does with what you do with the life you have been given. Whether mortal or immortal. We donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need to face off against vampires intent on our death to learn the underlying principles of life, since the actual means by which the principles are revealed is less important than the principles themselves. Besides, Bella already has Learned, so we can just Learn the principles from her example. Sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gone through a lot to show us how. So the least we can do is give it some thought. But, we have to Learn they are there in order to look for them -- to Believe that we can find them. And to Change our lives and Commit to staying true to our principles as we continue to grow through life. And, like Bella, with each circuit of the Wisdom Cycle, we will be able to see from a higher perspective -- from a new, ever-growing Worldview. THE END

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Appendix The Worldview Cycle and the Characters of the Twilight Saga Worldview Approaches Behaviors Consequences

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Humans RENEE Worldview: Worldview are how a person sees themself, life, and the world of possibilities they live in. Renee is a delightful character in many ways. She is scatter -brained and funny, and is probably the best kindergarten teacher in the entire school she works at. But as a person, she seems to have some issues with time. As in, she seems to think that time stopped for her when she was young. And that time has been stopped ever since then. Renee is “...very young for her age,” according to Bella. Her basic worldview seems to include the notion that, since she’s so “young,” it’s okay to be irresponsible about most things. Otherwise, since she’s not mentally deficient, she would have paid more attention to things like the bills and dry-cleaning. What is the Cause and Effect of her Worldview? Of course, she left her marriage, with Charlie, after having Bella (a new responsibility). By leaving, she also lost what responsibility she had toward him, and by extension, Forks. Her daughter says of their relationship that “someone has to be the adult,” meaning her, not her mother. How irresponsible is she? At the end of Twilight, in the hospital, Bella says she recognized her mom’s newly

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motherly tone from lectures Bella -- as a young girl -- had given her mother about the men she’d seen. Ouch. Hopefully, Phil is helping her to handle her life better. Approaches: Approaches arise from Worldviews, and encompass how a person generally acts and reacts to life, including their mindset, disposition, and character. Renee’s “young” and irresponsible Worldview leads her to be worried a lot. Being forgetful. Getting lost. And she has been lost, to some extent or another. Renee’s Approaches go beyond something, like, simply not being very bright. Rather, this kind of irresponsibility is not an accident. It’s a life choice. Renee actually seems pretty bright. Sharp. Observant. “Perceptive.” When she chooses to be. Renee’s general Approaches to life have left a lot of motherly things for Bella to take care of -- cooking, cleaning, laundry, dishes, shopping, household finances, and dating rules. The chores Bella did to help out Charlie (perhaps to sort of “pay him back” for allowing her to move in with him suddenly), appears to have been a necessity in Renee’s home. Was Bella able to have a real childhood? She has no real friends that we’re aware of. Renee blames it on Bella being “born 30 years old” but, even if that is true, it might also be an excuse for Renee to say she hasn’t done anything wrong by shifting her adult responsibilities upon her young daughter. Of course, Bella loves Renee. So that means something.

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But that may actually say more about Bella, and her capacity for love, than it speaks for Renee’s goodness. Even with all the work Bella does for Charlie, things seem easier for her now than in Renee’s home. Perhaps that is because Bella doesn’t have to care for him emotionally, just practically. Behaviors: A person’s Behaviors arise from their Approaches, and include the things they actually do, say, and think in their daily lives -- including their ingrained habits. In the day-to-day, Bella says that Renee is “well known for jumping the gun,” and is “flighty,” “erratic, harebrained,” “irresponsible,” “slightly eccentric,” and didn’t act like “the adult” in her home. Bella says Renee reacts with a “childlike” mind, which could be a good thing -- or bad. Apparently, there was a need for Bella to lecture her mother about her repeated problems with men -- enough to establish a pattern for those lectures. Perhaps Bella exaggerates about Renee’s irresponsibility, but that is a fairly telling detail. Renee works as a teacher in Kindergarten, so as an educator, that must have helped in her dealings with her daughter. Renee escapes into playing the classical piano, which takes some self-discipline, and she plays well enough to impress Bella, who says her mother was “happy, absorbed,” and when she played. And the first adjective Bella calls her mother, on the first page of Chapter 1 in Twilight is “loving.” And that goes a very long way. She seems to sincerely love Bella, up to a

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point at least. And Bella loves Renee enormously, so readers love her, too. Plus, Renee is something of a comedian against Bella’s “straight man.” Which is another plus, at least when you’re a character in a novel. Consequences: The cumulative effects of the Behaviors of one’s life, for themselves and those around them, form the basis of their Consequences. Consequences may inform, reinforce, or shape a person’s Worldview, in turn. Renee has enormous potential. She has her good points both as a delightful character and as a person. Yet, in the books, she is largely used as a contrast with Bella, who really is more the parental figure in their inverted relationship. Renee loves Bella, and would like her daughter to return to living with her (to an extent). And Bella loves her very much in return, which includes overlooking, moderating, and forgiving her mother’s faults and weaknesses. But, despite her keenly observant, child-like mind, (she immediately sees that things are serious between Bella and Edward), Renee doesn’t really Learn all that she could. Over time, Renee’s resulting foolishness seems more like willful ignorance. And it may be wise to avoid the willfully ignorant. We may like them, but if we cannot trust them, there often isn’t much we can give to that relationship, in healthy ways at least. Not that they won’t be demanding. Their irresponsibility toward themselves and the course

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of their own lives may spread to harming others around them, even if they didn’t originally intend to. And so, such people are very likely to end up hurting those they love, again and again. That they are often willfully “ignorant” of how much they are harming others is the truly dangerous part of such people. Because then it eventually is happening on purpose, just because they don’t want to have to change. Another problem is that other people generally avoid them (for good reason). So they lose influence. The general goal of most high-functioning people in life is to gain influence. That doesn’t mean celebrity, or wealth, or an important position, or being super cool. That means the ability to win people over, and, the ability to do things that make a difference, singly or as a group. Some people look for shortcuts to get influence -- using fame, money, position, or status -- but they may find that kind of influence ends quickly: Their celebrity diminishes. They run out of money. They lose their position. Other people become more “cool.” And their fantasy of influence (because such “influence” is usually a fantasy) ends, often quickly, and usually forever. The only real, true, lasting influence is gained through love. The kind of love exhibited in service. Love is something given to others, and sometimes yielded back in return. It cannot be taken from others. It cannot be forced from them. Respect can be demanded, at least formally. Trust can be

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earned. But love is another matter. Renee and Bella love one another, so there is a relationship of mutual influence, which is wonderful. But how much Renee is willing to act on that “love” seems... limited. Renee’s irresponsibility and immaturity undermines her from helping Bella as much as she could, or probably should -- including even being around her. So, she loses her influence to help the person she was, at one point, closest to. So Bella leaves Renee, other than a few quick returns (including her hospital stay). At the end of the series, there are only a handful of people who Bella will probably never see again. Greatest among them, it appears, is Renee. So, through Cause and Effect, as far as we know, Bella will avoid her mother. Forever. In the end, perhaps the only lasting thing Renee gave to Bella, other than a fear of “marriage,” is for the mother’s example to act as a springboard for her daughter -- to show Bella what she shouldn’t be like. Edward does note that Renee is observant, intuitive and perceptive (like Bella), which is a really good thing because then Renee can grow, by pulling her life together. And Bella just had to move out for Renee’s relationship with Phil. Many newlyweds need space to work out their relationship -- their new life together. But normally the child moves out and marries, not the other way around. Bella left her mom because she is no fool. She loves and has helped Renee as much as she could, so readers may assume

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that Bella will do the best she could for her mom. But in this case, the “best she could” meant leaving her alone to live her own life. Another way Bella was the “mother” to Renee. CHARLIE Worldview: Charlie is another truly delightful character, another fan favorite. Like Renee, he has “time” issues in his Worldview. Time “stopped” for him, too, when he got divorced. And, still is stopped. At least, at the start of Twilight. So, his basic Worldview is something like the “doomed” point of view discussed earlier. His wife and child left and he is missing them, to an extent. He lives with the same job, in the same house, doing the same things, more or less as he did the day they left. The world has moved on, but Charlie never did. Not even to learn the basics of how to care for himself (at least not very well). Perhaps he feels he failed in his responsibilities, and so fears that taking on any new ones will result in only more defeat and pain. As in his failed marriage with Renee. With Bella’s (and the Quileute’s) help, Charlie’s Worldview improves, especially during Breaking Dawn. Approaches: Charlie, also known as Police Chief Swan, is always willing to help others, showing his altruistic Worldview. Which is great. But he is unwilling to help himself move forward. Charlie

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pretty much grows about as much as he talks. Which is to say: As little as possible. On the other hand, Chief Swan may seem oblivious, but actually he may be trying to give Bella (some) space. So, like Bella, Chief Swan may know more than he lets on. Yet in general, Charlie seems more than just quiet; he is withdrawn. Something his daughter tends to do as well. In many ways, Bella, who says she has “too much Charlie in” her, is more like her father. Yet, despite their similarities and love for one another, Charlie (like Renee), provides numerous examples for Bella -- of what not to do. Behaviors: Charlie worries a lot. Despite his stoic, public persona as Chief Swan, Charlie is an anxious man, and that anxiety in his Approaches, may be what leads to his acting withdrawn in his day-to-day Behaviors. However, given his altruism, his worries don’t seem to be for himself; they are for others. Especially Bella. As a result, Charlie is apparently much more aware of Bella’s personal life than she realizes. Which is something he shares in common with many good parents. For example, in Twilight, Charlie jokes with Edward about Bella going to play baseball with the Cullens. When Edward laughs, that shows that the boy has spent enough time with his daughter to get the joke -- more time than Bella was letting on. Which suggests that the two teens are closer than she lets on, as well. Which is why Chief Swan specifically asks Edward to “take care of my girl, all right?”

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Everything Charlie says to Bella can be seen in the light of this Approach. He is keenly aware of her moods, her welfare, and her lovingly kind nature. He just worries a bit about how her Approaches will affect Bella’s her relationship with boys. Unlike Renee, it appears that Charlie has had no romances at all since she left. In the movies, Charlie seems to drink almost constantly at home. But in the book, he’s quite sober. In every respect. Charlie loves his daughter. And he is the police chief. So he is both responsible and altruistic. Extremely so. To the point where he isn’t just not caring for himself, but appears to be purposely neglecting himself. Perhaps Bella is exaggerating, but there is a difference between being unselfish, or not thinking about your own needs, and... punishing yourself. The only real thing Charlie does for himself is go fishing. Like Renee’s piano playing, it appears he loses himself in that. If Bella hadn’t shown up and “saved” him, he could have merely fished his life away. And, as many fans’ favorite supporting character, it seems Charlie has a lot more to offer the world than only that. Consequences: Bella’s father starts off as less aware, and less able to do things, in many ways, than Renee does. But he learns, over time, and loves Bella enough to become more careful, communicative, and affectionate to his only child. As Bella lives with him, Charlie seems to become more aware of others. He generally gains greater responsibility and influence throughout the Saga, especially with Bella.

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And in stark contrast to his ex-wife -- who may or may not be improving herself in her new life with Phil -- ultimately, Charlie is introduced to the immortal world, making him one of very, very few humans who have been given that gift (and allowed to live). As such, he becomes a sort of leader among all the lives in which he lives -- be it the human, vampire, or werewolf world. He has influence in them all. Charlie succeeds by specifying his philosophy, which can be very helpful to a person: “Need to know.” Jacob interprets that as a limiting factor, and perhaps it is. But it also gives him a measure of authority; that is, if Chief Swan, a person familiar with how laws actually work, “needs to know” something, in whatever sphere, mortal or immortal, he will be told. So Charlie isn’t willfully ignorant (like Renee), at least not anymore. He ends up being focused on learning whatever it is that he actually needs to know (and not worrying about things that aren’t his responsibility). Which is a major step into a larger world. BELLA Worldview: Well. There is a lot that could be written about Bella’s complex Worldview. But one thing is that Bella is at the far end of the altruistic -versus-selfish scale. She seems completely unselfish. So, she can care, fully, for those around her, for the people she loves. And she loves them deeply. As she also loves the truth. So, since truth is often the proverbial, two-edged sword,

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Bella is also meek, in the best sense. Meaning that she is humble, and not presumptuous at all. She understands life well enough to know she isn’t all that. Which doesn’t mean she isn’t, it just means comparing herself to others is simply not a major problem for her. Which is a good thing. And so, with her devotion to others and truth itself, she can be very brave -- despite her humbly comparing herself to the Cowardly Lion, and so on. With that meekness, and its resulting bravery, she is driven to learn more. Unanswered questions weigh upon her. Which is one of her greatest strengths, because then, she works to learn all she needs to know. But, Bella still doesn’t see herself very clearly. It is as though she doesn’t realize that she is the hero of her own story -- of her own life. Another Worldview challenge she seems to face is that, initially, she doesn’t know anyone as altruistic as she is. Which leaves her somewhat... worried. Like her father. So when Bella finally meets someone as altruistic as herself -- Edward Cullen -- they can both, finally, truly relate to one another. And truly relax. And that gives them both, and their relationship, a sense of destiny -- fulfilling and uncontrived. Approaches: Bella has a lot of contradictory impulses in her Approaches. She is lonely, and thus, fairly miserable. This doesn’t seem to have been entirely her choice. Other humans, in general, seem to have kept a distance from Bella throughout her life.

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This avoidance could stem from her future-vampire-queenof-the-world qualities, which would be... daunting. Or, it could be because of the fact that she is smarter, wiser, kinder, and more mature, than they probably are. So, she distances herself from them, in turn, and assumes the problem is hers. In a sense, perhaps that is true. In fact, that may be the reason that the guys in Forks like her so much is because -- unlike the boys who grew up with her in Phoenix -- they haven’t had time to realize just how extraordinary she really is. Especially when her basic approach -- a disconnect -- is to assume that she is just like everyone else. Her wishful thinking is understandable, but inaccurate. She isn’t like most people. She’s better. Bella’s caring for others makes her brave, and hardworking. She is willing to protect those she loves, no matter the cost to herself. And she will do as much as she can for them, too, no matter how much work that means for her. She really and truly cares for them, which is what true love is like. So, Bella seems surprised -- and hurt -- that others often don’t feel the same, like when her high school friends abandon her. Especially when she is in need. Repeatedly. Bella is unconcerned about being on the low end of the middle class. Kind of on the “poor” side of American society. Yet money (which Charlie can keep in a jar) or wealth (like the billions the Cullens have stashed away), in and of itself, doesn’t bother her one way or the other. She often feels driven by others’ needs -- that she should

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do something for them. Something to help. And she also is driven to help herself by growing. Beyond mere self-reliance, she wants more than life has offered to her so far. She wants, and expects, more from herself. Thus, Bella is always seeking knowledge. It is a constant pressure for her, and reaches far beyond what she (quickly) learns in school. She learns a lot about life, others, and herself. However, despite how well she observes the world around her (as Edward notes frequently), Bella doesn’t see herself clearly (as Edward also notes frequently). Always learning, but often clueless about her own self and her own feelings. Brave for others, but she tells herself what a coward she is. Bella is a walking contradiction. So, even though they have so much in common, Edward (also frequently) says that Bella “always surprises” him. Regardless, with meeting Edward, she is thrilled with him, and the potential he offers to her to gain more from life -including an evolving, deeper understanding of herself. Behaviors: Bella is always learning, but, is often worrying. Anxiety and fear will be explored more in a later book (for New Moon) but for now, it can simply be said that learning starts growth, but anxiety keeps it from happening. So she is working at cross-purposes in her life. Bella is an exceptional person, yet her often contradictory Approaches leave her stuck, and in something of a quandary when it comes to making choices in the day-to-day. Notably when it comes to choosing one boyfriend.

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Yet she continues to seek more from life, including (especially) wisdom. Which is a very wise choice. Bella is keenly observant in the day-to-day, which reveals a keen desire to learn more. And more. Because with wisdom, you can become anything. So Bella is able to (eventually) make good choices, even though she says she feels torn until she finally decides. Still, her self-reliance has left her very capable to not only care for herself, but also for those she loves. Thus, Bella is able to express her love for others in moving and helpful ways. Which she does with, literally, everyone she knows. Consequences: The entire Twilight saga shows the Consequences of Bellaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s choices. Although Bella finds making decisions difficult, once she is committed, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s finished. She simply finds a way, somehow, someway, to end all the ignorance and obstacles that she faces in her life. Edward, Jacob, and others all help Bella at one time or another. Including when she is in physical danger, beyond her mortal abilities to manage as she confronts the immortal world. Yet, in the end, it is Bella who really saves herself. And Edward. And Jacob. And Renesmee. And Charlie, the Werewolves, and each member of the Cullen family. And, indeed, the entire immortal world. Rescuing them from their ignorance, fear, and (perhaps) the oppression that the Volturi have had upon them for millennia. Bella wanted to learn more. She wanted more from her life. So she learned about,

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sacrificed for, supported, taught, loved, fought for, and saved them all. In the end, her path goes from being a normal, stumbling teen girl, to becoming -- literally -- the most powerful person on the planet. She shows readers how they, too, can overcome the world. Bella succeeds in many different levels at once. The Twilight Saga, itself, can be read several different levels, with a lot of different meanings. Like any great literature, it can be “read” literally, morally, and metaphorically. Literally means “this happened, then that happened... and what was going on behind-the-scenes was such-and-such.” Which is really fun. Morally is what this book is mostly about -- what can be learned from a book, even if it wasn’t actually written to be a primer on highly effective living. If it has meaning -- and every story does, or it wouldn’t be a story -- then identifying that meaning is not only helpful in terms of “lessons learned,” but also in learning how to understand (and interpret) one’s own life. Which is a big deal. Metaphorical interpretation examines things more deeply, however. Which is really revealing. For instance, briefly, here is one metaphorical interpretation of Twilight: The Earth is secretly covered with immortal beings, who look like people, but not exactly, each with supernatural, “god-like” powers (such as prophecy, knowing the hearts and minds of men, strength, beauty, destructive abilities,

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compassion, etc. Some of whom are overtly preoccupied with, (1) preserving human life, and (2) the eternal fate of mankind. They have in-depth conversations about spiritual and moral issues, like chastity, and it’s effect on the fate of one’s immortal soul. They secretly watch over humans under their care, especially at night. And, they shine with a supernal, unearthly light. So the dramatic question is posed: Just who are these beings, anyway? Metaphorically speaking? (Especially because they don’t quite seem sure themselves.) Bella describes them -- outright -- as “angelic” and “perfect” and “god-like.” In a wide variety of ways. Over and over. And over. And over. It is one of the key distinctions of her narrative, and has been widely noted. So, Bella, in contrast, is a very human human who is literally stumbling through life, who recognizes these beings’ divine connection and/or potential (thereby realizing her own as well), and through her sacrificial love, redeems them. She goes through several religious gateway experiences -baptism of water (cliff jumping), baptism of fire (transformation), the creation experience at a Native American sacred fire ceremony, etc. And she resists temptation in a variety of ways. Proven to be pure, she gains immortality. She and Edward, sanctified by marriage and joined in love, create (immortal) life -- the ultimate “god-like” power -- and by doing so, overcome evil society, creating a new world (also a god-like thing to do), based upon love and the value of one’s immortal soul.

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So that’s one way to look at Twilight. Is it the only way? Of course not. Yet it is still entirely valid. And revealing. On a certain, metaphorical level. Please notice that the words “six-pack” don’t appear once in that entire description. But Bella’s courage, hope, love, and perseverance do. She is a hero on many levels. And an intriguing one at that. The Bella-seeking-heaven reading may be fairly obvious, as it runs (very) prominently throughout the Twilight Saga. First Mike, and then Jacob, represent “mankind” in a man vs. God/earth vs. heaven/status-quo vs. excellence decision she must make. Unfortunately, many critics have missed it entirely. And some fans, too. FORKS HIGH SCHOOL Worldview: As a group, the Forks High School community could be thought of as representing human society in general. With the exception of the angelic Angela, the others -- Jessica, Mike, Lauren, etc. -- seem to think that they are basically as good as people can get. They fit in with the status quo, and... that is all they can (or should) do, right? Many cultures usually offer a median, a fallback, for social situations. These are offered not as the best people can do, but rather as a default, a lowest common denominator, or as something to keep folks civilized. Unfortunately, many people confuse these fallbacks, which

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may eventually become a societal norm, with an ideal. So everyday people, raised to think of these base standards as an ideal, can often become confused, uncomfortable or even resentful (or, perhaps, jealous), when a true ideal appears. For example, the high school society seems to act like that toward the ideals represented by the Cullens -- and Bella. Approaches: With the exception of Angela, who is altruistic -- and thus sensitive and aware, and thus trusted and influential -- the other humans can all be seen as trying to outdo each other, in whatever way they think is important. For example, Mike, Eric, and Tyler try to get together with Bella (“over” each other and Edward), even though they clearly don’t understand her. And how could they truly care for what have no understanding of? So they don’t truly value Bella. Jessica, similarly, mostly wants to be seen with Bella to increase her social standing (according to Bella). So she can’t be a truly supportive friend when she is really just trying to get a “coolness boost” from Bella. Even the teachers at the high school seem annoyed by Bella’s superior, intelligence and beauty (compared to them anyway). As they seem also to be toward Edward, as well. Behaviors: In the high school’s society, the main event in Twilight, for them, is the different boys asking Bella out. To a girl-ask-guy dance. It’s a silly thing to do, as Bella certainly deserves more

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respect than they are willing to give her, and they look silly doing it. That sequence, and the entire book as far as their society is concerned, culminates in Tyler assuming Bella will go with him to the prom. And showing up at her house to take her there. Epic fail, Tyler. The boys’ egocentric selfishness leads to a huge lack of understanding, which leads to mistakes, which leads to increasingly silly attempts to show how cool they are compared to everyone else (including Bella). Meanwhile, Jessica is shooting daggers from her eyes every time Mike even talks to Bella. Which makes her look pretty silly also. They could have just accepted the reality of the situation (which is more like what the film’s characters do) and not embarrassed themselves so much. But that would have taken humility. And for some reason, for many people -- no matter how typically “normal” they really are -- humility is the one quality they will not take on. So they look silly, instead of humble. And so they are humbled instead. Which looks quite a bit worse. Consequences: In high school, due to confusion over understanding themselves, life, and others, the other students are generally less than the person they imagine themselves to be. Not that they can’t reach a certain level of importance someday; they just have a long way to go to gain that

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influence. Longer than they may realize. So, most of what they do is a series of missteps, misunderstandings, and mistakes. Which is one way to learn. If, in fact, they actually choose to learn from those mistakes. By comparison, Bella just reads a lot , depending on how carefully one reads, which can be a quicker way to learn about life. Less painful. Perhaps more effective, even. And doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t look as silly. Also, the students at Forks High, while seeming nicer in general than high schools in real life, are generally selfish. Everyone else seems to primarily think about themselves and their social status. And little else. Except for Angela. The problem with selfishness in general is that it leaves the person egocentric -- they assume the world revolves around them. Since they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think about the world around them, they are left consequently clueless, and have to live with the consequences of living unaware. This is why selfishness is actually self-defeating, because it leads to unawareness -- to ignorance. In the end, there may be much more to the high school students, their lives, and their potential. But in terms of their day-to-day Behaviors, as far as they deal with our narrator Bella, the Consequences of their lives often seems to be a comedy of errors. Which is great for a story. Not so great in real life. Except for Angela. Her choices, based on her caring for others, empowers her to be sensitive, aware, wise, effective, and influential. Kind of like Bella.

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Vampires All the Cullens, and most other vampires, are affected by circumstances of their pre-immortal lives and the circumstances of their conversion to immortality. For nearly all of them, this death-transition-rebirth was unexpected, violent, and very, very painful. They act accordingly, in response. The Cullen family may be new to the vampire canon, but beings like them are not entirely new to the world. Many, if not all, cultures have people like that -- immortal, full of grace and light (often, literally), living between two worlds, committed to helping (certain) people reach immortality themselves. Call them angels, bodhisattvas, immortals, the resurrected, the translated, the ascended, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Elijah,â&#x20AC;? demi-gods, superheroes, or the Olympian gods who walk the face of the Earth, the Cullens -- metaphorically, at least -- are not alone. VOLTURI Worldview: The Volturi Worldview is based on devaluing life itself -- be it human, vampire, or werewolf. At the root of their Worldview is the ridiculous idea that life means little -- except for their own, of course, which is incredibly, profoundly important, beyond all else. This is the immortal worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cultural Worldview, spread -- and enforced -- by the Volturi.

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Approaches: The Volturi’s Approach to their own vampire natures is not to reject that they are sub-human, or “monstrous.” Rather, they embrace it. Celebrate it. They want to think of themselves as undead monsters. Why? Since the Volturi taught the other immortals to disregard all of the human-believed myths about vampires, why did they keep one, and only one: That vampires are “soulless, inhuman monsters?” All of the fake rumors about vampires were likely started by the Volturi themselves, in a centuries’ long Approach to protect themselves against humans. Did the other immortals ever stop and wonder if they were lied to as well? Not to point out the obvious, but vampires are a lot more “human” than any animal. And if they were really talking about whether they possessed an eternal, human soul, where exactly did they think their souls had gone to? Isn’t the “soul” the very spark of life? Certainly they are only too-familiar with death. Did they really think they were actually dead? Or undead? As they say on Sesame Street: “They breathe. They eat. They grow” (e.g., the Volturi’s changing skin, eyes, etc.). “And that is how you know... Woh-oh! They’re alive!” Seems pretty straightforward. If the toddlers watching Sesame Street know what it means to be alive, why did the Volturi somehow miss those obvious points? Because if they are still alive, they must still have their souls.

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Indeed, their immortality has made their potential grow to a range of extremes: For beneficial good. Or, for harmful evil. To become veritable angels, walking the face of the Earth. Or devils. Because, as with normal humans, the freedom to choose is still theirs. Which means they have an eternal responsibility to choose wisely. So, why did they choose to believe this one lie? To use it as an excuse for their harmful behavior. The Volturi’s Worldview of “protecting their way of life” led to more, and more, and more deaths. And if you disagreed, or challenged their Worldview in any way, their Approach was that you would die (or “end” or whatever). Which sort-of proved they were right. Or so they thought. So they wanted to think. The Volturi supported this Approach through a variety of means. They try to claim they are protecting the lives of all immortals. Rather than just their own. Further, they claim they are, in effect, royalty. And so, since they are innately superior, it simply must be true that their own lives are more precious than all others’ lives. The Volturi (especially Aro and Caius) claim that their “way of life” is “natural.” But “natural” does not mean that it is necessarily good, or helpful, or beneficial. The Volturi also claim that they pursue knowledge and enlightenment. Perhaps this is true, when compared with the absolute monstrosity of the ancient past. But they haven’t

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actually overcome their monstrosity; they’ve just gotten better at hiding it -- in order to act more monstrously, in worse ways, and for longer periods of time. They aren’t after privacy; they were after secrecy. The worst, most evil kind. How to tell? Such secrecy doesn’t benefit all involved. It only keeps themselves safe -- from the harmful Consequences of their Behaviors. Not that they haven’t seen that other Approaches were possible. And more beneficial. Carlisle “greatly admired their civility, their refinement, but they persisted in trying to cure his aversion to ‘his natural food source,’ as they called it. They tried to persuade him, and he tried to persuade them, to no avail.” Behaviors: The Volturi have worked hard to get rid of choice itself. They argue that they’re protecting all immortals -- protecting their lives and freedoms -- but are really only protecting their own. The Volturi philosophy of “you can do whatever want, as long as you kill nearly everyone you meet” is hardly freedom of choice. In practical terms, as becomes clear in Breaking Dawn, the Volturi are using Chelsea’s special powers, which can bind people to one another, to create a false family. A counterfeit family. The guard has had their power to choose taken from them, and they are bound to one another, with or without their free and informed consent. Only the supernal power of true love can overcome their bonds.

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Moreover, if anyone actually challenges the Volturi, in any way, they are killed. And killing seems to take up most of the Volturi’s time. The Volturi do this for two main reasons. First, to collect the most powerful vampires from other covens and bring them (via Chelsea’s binding power) into their Guard. Second, bullies like the Volturi love to say the people they’re hurting are the ones “attacking” them -- a strategy that works best if the victims complain or defend themselves. Because that “proves” that the victims were attacking the Volturi, and the “Vampire Way of Life.” Playing “Who’s the Victim?” is the Volturi’s favorite game, it seems, and since, according to them, they themselves are always the “victim,” and everyone else are the dangerous ones, they always “win.” And everyone else dies. So, as long as they excuse themselves by being the victims, they can do anything and everything to “protect” themselves. And then their Worldview never has to change. And their abusive and murderous Approaches don’t need to change either. Because all these beings are attacking them, threatening them, so they simply must do everything in their power to fight back against all these dangerous, unruly beings. Which (bonus!) is really fun, too. Because they wanted to destroy and murder anyway. It’s all so convenient. So, they claim, it’s perfectly appropriate that all those mean

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people out there die. Because, after all, the Volturi (and, all other vampires, supposedly) are the ones who are really being threatened. Humanity across the globe is constantly on red alert for vampire attacks, so they could all be found out any day, and destroyed by all the Global Exoskeltan-powered Anti-Vampire Armies (Now, with Built-in Flamethrowers!). Vampires’ very existence is threatened at every moment! Except, of course, that it isn’t. And, according to The Official Illustrated Guide, there are human families who have lived for centuries with a family vampire relation to help and protect them whenever needed. And then there is the fact the Volturi aren’t actually being threatened. By anyone at all. For most humans, just hearing about the Volturi will result in immediate death. And, as can be seen in the Werewolf exterminations and in the Southern Wars, the Volturi feel free to kill anyone and everyone they want, in what is not merely murder, but nearly genocide. The remaining vampires and werewolves are allowed to continue living as long as they are not a threat -- to the Volturi. And if those remaining immortals live, murder, or die, outside of any threat to themselves, the Volturi couldn’t care less. Like any bully. Except they, themselves, never die. So it all just continues. Until their lies and excuses are revealed to the entire immortal world -- including who the real victims and bullies are -- in the Clearing at the end of Breaking Dawn.

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Consequences: What are the Consequences of the Volturi’s Behaviors? They took over the immortal world in the year 500 AD. Since then, they dispensed capital punishment on whoever they wished. An estimate of 25 human deaths per week to sustain the Volturi and their guard would mean that their rule has resulted in the murders of nearly two million people. While that compares quite favorably with such plagues upon humanity as World War II (62 to 78 million deaths, worldwide), cigarette smoking (5 million deaths per year, worldwide), or even “medical errors” (200,000 U.S. deaths per year), two million people is still a lot of life ended in order to preserve lives of the two dozen (or so) members of the Volturi Guard. Which includes over 260,000 human deaths (at least) since Carlisle pointed out to them that human blood was unnecessary for the vampires’ survival. Indeed, Aro alone -- averaging one human per week since his creation in 1300 B.C. -- would have been personally responsible for 175,000 deaths, in order to perpetuate his own, single life. And that doesn’t even begin to consider countless vampires and werewolves who met their end so the Volturi could preserve their monstrous Worldview -- their way of life. The Worldview perpetuated by the Volturi’s assumed “royal” status. Such villainy! Perhaps it should be called their “way of death,” instead.

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No matter what the Volturi claim to have done to benefit others, nothing is likely to make up for the millions of lives lost at their hands -- not to mention the hundreds of millions lives lost because their cultural Worldview was taken up by others. The world itself would be a very different place if it had not been for Aro -- and the loss of generations untold cut short by his “natural” appetite. CARLISLE CULLEN Worldview: The Volturi’s Worldview is in stark contrast with the Cullen family’s worldview, which has been spread -- and encouraged -- by Carlisle. Carlisle joined his father’s ministry to rid the world of monsters, yet what he seemed to be devoted to was actually the end of needless bloodshed. His Worldview centers around valuing life itself. So when he was bitten by a vampire during a chase in 1663, he first thought of himself as having become a monster, yet refused to end anyone’s life -- and truly become monstrous. Unlike the Volturi, Carlisle preferred to end his own life through starvation, alone, rather than preserve his life through the murder of humans. In desperate thirst, he killed a roaming deer, and was refreshed, creating a new possibility, a new understanding, and a new Worldview, for immortals. So, when he met the Volturi, he tried to spread this wonderful, life-saving knowledge. But in them, he encountered a very different Worldview. One that resented life itself.

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Approaches: As a “vegetarian” vampire who doesn’t drink human blood, as a doctor, and as the creator of his own immortal family, Carlisle works fervently to preserve life. Further, Carlisle proves that the Volturi Coven’s Worldview/Approach of “We are monsters/So we can act like monsters” is wrong. Carlisle is not a lesser human. He is an ennobled one. Because life isn’t really an issue of who you are. It’s a matter of what you do. And if killing millions -- of humans, vampires, werewolves -- is the bottom of the moral spectrum (and it is), then saving millions is at the top. In general usage, the word “coven” may be loosely defined as a group of supernatural beings gathered by an interest in doing evil. Whereas, in general usage, the word “family” may be loosely defined as a group of beings gathered by love for one another. And in this case, that family is supernatural beings. They aren’t human; they’re more like angels. An aside: This is no mystery for Bella. As it happens, Bella sees the Cullens for what they are more clearly than the Cullen’s themselves do. Perhaps this is a reason why Stephenie Meyer chose to have Bella narrate the Twilight Saga. This way, the reader more easily sees the Cullens as great, ennobled beings. Just like Bella does. Plus, the reader can learn what it is like to actually become a hero. A hero of your own life’s story. Why does most everyone else see the Cullens as ennobled,

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except for the Cullens themselves? Because of the Volturi’s Worldview. Happily, Bella’s mind has not been polluted by the cultural lies they created. She sees the Cullens without distraction. She sees clearly that their immortal natures have increased their potential -- for good or ill. She sees them, and Carlisle, as they truly are. Behaviors: Carlisle only drinks the blood of animals (every week or two), and indeed, has completely overcome his taste for human blood. His vegetarian family all keeps to the same standards, even though the appeal for them remains. Carlisle does not claim that regular vampires are unnatural. But if they don’t keep to the same vegetarian standard, then they eventually have to leave. So Carlisle doesn’t blame or attack them. But he does withdrawfrom them, and has no regular association with them at all. Unlike the Volturi, Carlisle is neither a “victim,” or a victimizer, which is how the Volturi choose to see everyone. But he will live according to his conscience, and no one will stop him from doing so. Carlisle works daily as a physician, and says that he is most happy when his supernatural vampire abilities help him save lives -- lives that would otherwise be lost. In practice, this applies not only to human lives, but to immortals as well. And Carlisle continues to learn more and more, reading and studying as time allows, in order to help others more, especially his own family.

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Consequences: By comparison to the Volturi, Carlisle has been very successful. In basically everything. For instance, through his willingness to serve as a physician, and his relatively modest lifestyle (Isle Esme and his family’s car collection excepted), over hundreds of years, Carlisle has become a billionaire. Indeed, Forbes magazine has rated Carlisle as the wealthiest fictional character in all history, estimating his net worth at $34.1 billion (US), by causing the effect of billions in “compound interest,” along with “shrewd long-term investments in steel, gold, oil,” the stock market, and his invaluable collection of Renaissance art. Through his altruisism and helping others, Carlisle uses his fortune to help and serve others. Indeed, the money itself seems to be entirely unimportant to him. What is important to Carlisle is valuing life and saving lives, which has brought him lasting joy, in a variety of ways. Like when he helped Esme, as a human girl and later as a woman. He saved her, granting her immortality, and they fell in love. So his service and valuing of life brought him his wife, and entire family, who in turn filled his life with joy. His on-going learning has made him wise, and led him to be kind and patient. So he is highly influential everywhere he goes, and seems to be able to do basically anything he wants. His caring for others has also granted him self-control, whereas a lack of this all-important quality could have ruined him many times over.

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Carlisle’s influence helps him “control” others, but without force or compulsion. Rather, he influences them through love, truth, and gentle persuasion. He has also gained deep spiritual insights through his years of learning. He understands time clearly, and recognizes that the reality of “and then what?” in every situation means there is no such thing as “doom,” at least for those who seek to do good throughout their lives. So, Carlisle, among these other wonderful Consequences, has also gained what may be the one of the greatest gifts of all: Peace of mind, and a bit of heaven, amid a troubled world. ESME CULLEN Worldview: Esme, as a young wife, was seriously abused by her then-husband. When her first child died, she despaired and tried to kill herself over the loss of her child’s life. Her Worldview is similar to Carlisle’s Worldview in valuing life. She, like the rest of their family, is “vegetarian,” in only taking animal life to sustain herself. Esme, with her valuing of life itself, loves others deeply, and cherishes them. Of all the Cullens, she is the most hidden, and yet, also the most beloved. Approaches: Briefly, Esme’s loving Worldview leads her to Approach any problem toward creating harmony and sustaining positive relationships for her family, first, and for others, second. And for cleaning up broken salad bowls.

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Behaviors: Esme’s behaviors are, primarily, caring for her “family” as their mother. And they need some regular mothering. All of her “children” have lost loved ones, and she helps restore them by filling the holes left in their immortal hearts. She helps end any strife or arguments, with love, acceptance, kindness, and patience. And in her spare time, she restores homes to a new life as well, literally, to be lived in and enjoyed by her family. Consequences: Esme has created a loving family and home. They are very tightly knit. Her on-going efforts are productive and helpful to all those she loves. Indeed, it has helped her create a truly heavenly home here on Earth. Similarly, her own kindness has yielded kindness in return, which includes her own tropical island, a modern-day Eden. ROSALIE HALE Worldview: Rosalie had it harder than most of the Cullens when she became a vampire, and takes it harder, too. Her pampered and arrogant lifestyle began as a human. She expected to get all she wanted for no reason than she wanted it, rather than working hard to make it so. Rosalie admits later she that she was (and still is) “shallow.” Moreover, she often seems ungrateful, which always leads to a general unhappiness in a person’s life. Further, her human Worldview led to shock and dismay

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when she found how wrong she was about life, in so many things. Rather than humbly re-thinking how she thought about the world, it seems she turned to fear, anger, revenge, and more selfishness. Rosalie also suffers from a lack of understanding about time. Essentially, she feels that immortality means she is doomed forever; for example, with her infertility. She likes to fix things (like cars), which is beneficial, yet she does not seem eager to learn, which can be extremely harmful, especially over the long term. Since everybody lives in the long-term. Especially immortals. Partly because of her unwillingness to Change, her deep sadness over her infertility is never healed, and seems be getting worse over time. And she becomes less grateful and more unhappy because of that as well. Still, at heart, Rosalie truly loves Emmett and her family, which is her saving grace. Approaches: Like Emmett, Rosalie seems to think knows all she needs to know, already. So when things change -- which is all the time -- Rosalie is left unable to help or influence others. Or she winds up harming them, even when supposedly trying to help (as in her phone call to Edward about Bellaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cliff jump in La Push). So, her general resentment toward others, her situation, and eventually herself, sinks into bitterness. Which, despite her outward beauty, is very unattractive. So, in her Approaches, Rosalie attempts to prop up herself

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by admiring her own beauty, in order to not feel so damaged, as though she is perfect even with her many personality flaws. Further, she seems willing to bring down the rest of the family (including Bella) so they will be at her lower emotional level. She says, without any embarrassment, that she would give up her husband for the chance to be mortal again. Which is not ever going to happen. So why is she planning already to give up her “other half,” as if she could? She feels real pain over her infertility because she lost the ability to change. But instead of accepting that her life (like everything else) has changed, and then changing herself to better cope with that tragedy (like, changing her attitude), she seems to want the entire world to change around her, so she doesn’t have to. The real problem isn’t that she can’t change; it is that she won’t change. Behaviors: Because Rosalie is rather spoiled, she is often ungrateful. So, her main approach to new situations in her life is: Complain. She spends much of her time admiring her physical beauty, instead of working through her many emotional issues, which leave her the hardest Cullen to spend time with. Like most ungrateful/unhappy people, others generally avoid them, and over time, they gradually lose influence in life. In Rosalie’s case, losing influence just makes her all the more resentful and angry. Even to the point of refusing to help the family -- and Bella -- just when they are in the most danger, when James begins to hunt them all.

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This is why self-pity is such a dangerous path. Eventually, if left unchecked, it can lead to monstrosity. Consequences: Rosalie’s self-absorption has hurt her appeal and influence in her family and her world. Unless she learns to be more grateful, as she is for Emmett, she will never be happy. And since she says she’d give even him up for mortality (actually, for fertility) it would seem that her bitterness is effecting even that, her real source of happiness. Of course, with Bella’s help, she will become very grateful, for her opportunity to serve the young Renesmee, overcoming her greatest sorrows, and finding a path to true happiness. EMMETT (McCarty) CULLEN Worldview: In contrast, Emmet was being killed by a bear when he was saved by Rosalie. As she carried him to Carlisle to change him, he thought was being carried by an angel to heaven. This experience may have led to his violent nature, and his extraordinary ability for gratitude, which leads to a general happiness about life for Emmett. Which is what gratitude usually does. However, Emmett can also be somewhat selfish and (thus) clueless, like Rosalie. This comes out in his reckless nature. He often seems unaware of how bad the situation is around him. This is made worse because he doesn’t seem particularly eager to learn. So, Emmett seems to think he already knows everything he will ever need to know in life.

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Approaches: Emmett’s Approaches to any unknown circumstance -- which is quite common, since he’s not eager to learn -- is to be unafraid. However, that Approach is not based in understanding, but often in him regarding dangers in a flippant way. He has great strength, but lacking understanding limits one’s effectiveness (and leads to danger). As with Rosalie and her beauty, Emmett focuses on his strength, to cover up his other weaknesses. And when his strength fails him -- which strength without understanding often does -- Emmett is angry and resentful, yet fails to make himself stronger in other ways. Behaviors: Emmett’s gratitude fills his life with happiness. He finds Rosalie beautiful, enjoys his immortality, and is generally happy about life. But despite his physical strength, which he is (very) proud of, his self-absorption undermines his influence in his home. He is often left unable to help or influence others. Other than annoying them. Or providing comic relief. Not that he notices. Consequences: Emmett is always ready for a fight, which he (often) loses. Actually, we do not seem him win a single one-on-one confrontation, however playful or serious, in the entire saga. He seems unaware why (due to him not looking for understanding). Emmett is so competitive, that he often gets himself into a downward spiral, because “winning” at contests of strength

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are all he thinks he has available to prove his worth. Rosalie and Edward, both disappointed about immortality, appreciate his grateful and upbeat outlook. Readers do, too. But like Rose, he is becoming more arrogant, which undermines him and his influence in a variety of ways. In the end, Bella will eventually put him in his place, during the arm wrestling match. And yet, she will turn to him during their final confrontation with the Volturi, helping him to find the true importance of his strength: In helping, and by serving others, not himself. JASPER (Whitlock) HALE Worldview: Like Emmett, Jasper’s Worldview is also violent, but unhappily so. Many Twilight characters are walking contradictions, but few more so than Jasper. Like Rosalie, he resents his conversion -- or rather, his circumstances afterwards. Despite a clear Cause-and-Effect understanding and point of view, he seems somewhat confused by the turns his life has taken. Regardless, Jasper still thinks of himself as a soldier, a fighter. Yet, he is also philosophical, seeking peace. Which is ironic, since he continues to expect that deadly violence -- towards humans and vampires -- is natural. And imminent (like the Volturi’s Worldview, with which he was raised). He hasn’t actually found much peace. And won’t, until after he is basically punished, in New Moon, for going after Bella. She eventually shows him a better way to

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live, in Breaking Dawn. In the meantime, the Cullen’s vegetarian lifestyle gives him some freedom from depression, even though it is, for him, an unwelcome burden. And yet, Jasper remains deeply appreciative and loving toward Alice, and is loyal and devoted to her. Altruistic (if not utterly unselfish), his Worldview tends to focus on the past. Like many altruistic people, Jasper is confused by the abuse he has suffered. In his case, he was manipulated by Maria, including sexually, to murder huge amounts of mortals and immortals (however “logical” the murders seemed to be at the time). He assumed that was how the world was -- the way his abuser created the world he lived in -- and perhaps Jasper still has difficulty accepting that how he was treated was based in Maria’s choices, not in how life itself was. Or is, now. So, for Jasper, he continues to view life as a battlefield. Unlike Carlisle and Esme, he still has a win-lose way of thinking that undermines his effectiveness in life. Particularly because, since life isn’t really a battlefield -where if others lose, you win -- he creates his own struggles to fit the Worldview he doesn’t understand enough to change. Approaches: Jasper’s Approaches lead him to be sensitive to others’ emotions. But he is blind to his own. He is smart, analytical, altruistic, loving -- so what’s the problem with the most miserable member of the Cullen family? It’s because of that win-lose, battlefield, “Clearing” way of thinking. With that Worldview, for him to win,

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someone else has to lose. Which is probably fine when a real battle shows up. Great. Jasper is really helpful when someone needs to die. But when he is walking down a hallway in high school, it’s not very helpful. There is irony in him being married to Alice, since he is always facing the past, as she is the future. In reality, 99.9% of the time, no one else is actually fighting him. So he Approaches his Worldview by turning his win-lose thoughts toward fighting himself, within. Jasper ends up trapped, thinking about the same old problems -- his “need” for human blood, his association of human blood with “rewards,” his abusive background, his helping Maria to abuse others, their emotions as he brought their lives to an end, the profoundly false Worldview he once “knew” to be true, and the fact that despite all his military discipline, he is the weakest of the Cullen clan -- over and over and over. Perhaps if he had humbly admitted just how wrong he’d been, maybe he could have moved on from his past. But with his Approach to time itself leaving him always focused on the past, he won’t do so. Instead of balancing his past with his future, leaving him in the now, he ends up taking pride in the “strength” he had before, and in what he did: Killing hundreds of other beings at Maria’s direction and for her benefit. For someone who was manipulating him. No wonder he, among all the Cullens, reveres the Volturi most highly. Despite his outward appearances as a vegetarian vampire, Jasper is inwardly still listening to their lie. And,

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still, to an extent, is emotionally hurting because of it. The sooner he accepts the truth of how much of a mistake he had made -- by allowing and perpetuating his own abuse -- the sooner he will finally find peace. Behaviors: Jasper is constantly experiencing the emotions of everyone around him. He may feel a bit like a pinball being bounced around through life, often unable to control his own emotional life. So, he keeps himself emotionally distant from others, except Alice. Most of the time. He is very private, mostly because he is having such a hard time, and is so unhappy. Not that everyone isn’t aware of his struggles, or burdened by them to one extent or another. He wants to help, and contribute. He is not a whiner. Even though, mostly, Jasper’s day to day Behaviors are filled with... suffering. Consequences: Eventually, Jasper saves the day, when called upon. His bravery means he is willing to confront danger at anytime. But danger actually appears only occasionally. To fulfill one’s duties, it is important to be willing to sacrifice. And Jasper is willing. But instead of accepting that his world has changed, and then changing himself accordingly, he still seems to think that refusing to change is the same thing as “sacrificing,” which isn’t true. So Jasper may have done some changing, outwardly, but not inwardly. He hasn’t changed much at all.

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Thus, he is the most unhappy of the Cullens, and perhaps the most unhappy person of the entire Saga (except for Marcus of the Volturi, who also will not change). The Civil War ended long ago, but Jasper is still at war within himself. He finally gets his big battle, and finds a measure of cathartic relief, at the end of Eclipse. But his refusal to change means he is also refusing to change to real happiness. Yet, as he (and Alice) should have foreseen though Cause and Effect, and as usually happens to those who refuse to change, Jasper eventually becomes so overwhelmingly miserable that he has to change. And, then, one day, truly grave danger appears, once and for all. The Cullens face a battle against grim, insurmountable odds. It is the moment he has held himself in reserve for, guarding against, wallowing in misery (in â&#x20AC;&#x153;self-sacrificeâ&#x20AC;?) for 140 years. He has been ready, willing, able, and profoundly determined throughout that time. The moment arrives. And what can Jasper do -- what must he do -- to serve and save those he has sworn to protect? To fight? To die? To war? None of the above. Jasper, after all this time, must simply run away. ALICE (Brandon) CULLEN Worldview: Alice, on the other hand, has her own issues with the abuse she suffered in the past. Her Worldview is only that of an immortal, and so to an extent, she has difficulties relating with others who are different from her.

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Since the trauma left her with no memory of mortal life, her time focus is on the future. Only the future. It is most effective for people to see the past and future both, accurately, because both are needed for true Wisdom -- perspective and potential. But despite that weakness, she “uses her powers for good, not evil.” And the stock market. Along the spectrum of altruistic versus selfish, Alice mirrors Jasper (and so their relationship is strong) in that she is generally very altruistic. But not completely so. With her foresight, and also like Jasper, Alice has a very clear Cause-and-Effect mentality. Indeed, her foresight is largely projections into the principle of Cause and Effect, and how things could play out in the future. Approaches: Because Alice has no past, she is hyperfocused on the future. But her Approach isn’t directed toward the real, actual, single future of what will truly happen. It is more of a decision-tree of possible consequences. So Alice is better at understanding Cause and Effect than her conflicted husband (who is still trying to trace back the Causes of the Effects he’s living with). And she has a very good understanding of how to answer the big question that everyone living in this ever-changing world needs to know: “And then what?” And, it must be said, Alice’s main Approach to almost anything and everything is: Happy. Very happy. Yet as Alice’s central contradiction, despite her chirpy and upbeat

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demeanor, oftentimes Alice is more like the seers of old, foreseeing doom at every foolish turn. Alice, despite her outward cheer, is (by far) the gloomiest Cullen of all. Alice is the doomsayer. So-called “bubbly” people are often like that. After all, cute, peppy Alice is the one who lowers the boom, time and again. She warns Bella and her family about the consequences of their actions. Which will often be disastrous. And yet, it should be pointed out, the disasters she warns them of rarely actually come. Alice warned them, and they do something about it, so things usually work out for the best. Because they made them work out for the best. Which is how seeing Cause and Effect works. Behaviors: Alice’s tendency toward flighty personal affectations, like copying human life to the extreme, like beomg the world’s most voracious fashion maven, are her only real bit of selfishness. Her only real indulgence. So, she tries to turn those Approaches toward the service of others, like predicting weather, foreseeing stock market swings, or helping her family never to worry about what to wear. Alice exhibits a central contradiction of actions, which are rooted in her Worldview and Approaches. She seems flighty, and even sometimes silly, with her fixations on fashion. Also she is so relentlessly cheery most of the time. And yet, within, Alice is perhaps the most serious of the Cullens. She is forewarning everyone, all the time, of impending doom.

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Yet, because Alice understands Cause and Effect, she is also the quickest to let go of her visions of the future once changes have been made. She realizes the Effects those changes will have, so her visions are not a matter of blind faith, but rather faith rooted in knowledge -- especially knowledge of Cause and Effect. So, Alice is very helpful, and a really wonderful friend. Everyone seems to appreciate her understanding and her caring for them -- her altruism. Most of the time, anyway. Alice turns her foresight Approaches into a means of service for those she loves. She is highly altruistic with a strong sense of duty, which lends her a great deal of bravery, similar to her soldier-husband, Jasper. And, like her BFF Bella, Alice is absolutely dedicated to pursuing the truth, no matter what. And although her efforts are sometimes resented as meddling (especially by Edward), she loves them all anyway. Enough to keep telling them what disastrous consequences their choices will likely have. And perhaps that is the real reason why she is so happy. Because she is helping others, always, even when they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t foresee just how much they need help -- from their fashion disasters to their eternal marriages. And, as an effect of that cause, the Cullens -- and all immortals everywhere -- trust her completely. Consequences: Alice has enormous influence, over literally everyone who knows her. She is, simply, the most influential being in the entire vampire world. Even Aro

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immediately listens to her foresight. And follows it. She is also the only one who saves the day nearly as often as Bella does. She defeats those dangers with her understanding of the Consequences of Cause and Effect. Knowing you can change, and having faith in Cause and Effect, gets rid of fear. So despite her frequent role as doomsayer, in the Twilight Saga, Alice is the happiest person of all. EDWARD (Mason) CULLEN Worldview: As a human, Edward’s Worldview made him into... well, kind of a jerk. And it still comes out, from time to time. For example, in his eternal squabbling with his “sister,” Rosalie, even though they came from very similar times, places, and circumstances (sort of like in a real family). Edward was also somewhat selfish, egocentric, and pampered as mortal, though not quite to the same extent. Edward’s parents really loved him, so weren’t using him as a tool for their own social climbing, as Rosalie’s were. When he was changed, he found the pain of transformation overwhelming, and so, “pain” continues to overshadow his Worldview. And Edward is, most definitely, “pained.” Experts say that adolescents undergo a stage of brain development which helps them to suddenly become more aware of the possibilities -- and people -- in their lives. With his change to immortality, seventeen-year-old Edward had a

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similar experience, and became super-aware of others, leaving him able to read the minds of everyone around him. This was, no doubt, shocking to the childlike, unaware adolescent he had been. He was forced by his powers to suddenly become aware that he was not alone in the world. Even though, with the passing of his parents, he now actually was alone in his own world. After losing his mother, Edward may have continued having issues about “losing” other women in his life, specifically Bella. Despite Edward’s keen awareness of others -- or perhaps because he is aware of their every, passing thought -- he seems to regard others with a certain level of annoyance and disdain, viewing them as overwhelmingly petty. Thus, he tends to view himself as above others, and can be judgmental and condescending. Or, at least, he used to. Upon meeting Bella, he realizes (again) that his life is different than he had once assumed. He seems surprised to find himself to be as petty and preoccupied as others (or even more so). And here is Edward’s central contradiction: Although he is very aware of others, he is not very aware of himself... despite the pile of journals in his (movie) bedroom, So, in meeting Bella, Edward finds hope. And yet, depressed by his own mistakes -- of which he is now very pointedly aware -- Edward is doubtful about his hopes, and worries that he’ll be wrong again. Especially over

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something as foolish as falling in love with a fragile human. So he ruminates over these things -- his sorrows, mistakes, and contradictions -- again and again, as the Cullen children all seem to do. Trapped, like any good hero-to-be. Approaches: Why does Edward blow off Alice’s predictions, especially over Bella? Especially over Bella joining their family? Especially over what he wants most in life? Far more than anything else? Despite his and Alice’s special bond as the All-Knowing Psychic Wonder Twins of the Vampire World(TM), and although he believes in Alice and her abilities... he won’t accept the things that Alice’s abilities reveal about his life. Edward believes in Alice. He just doesn’t believe Alice. More specifically, Edward doesn’t believe he will get what he wants, because he doesn’t believe that he can get what he wants. Because he is a monster. After all, the Volturi said so. And of course, there was his “rebellious stage,” which more or less proved it. Or so he thinks. Edward has regretted his mistakes for 80 years -- killing murderers -- by the time he first meets Bella. He not only lives as a vegetarian vampire during all that time, but he is also quite withdrawn, to ensure that he will harm no one. Other than himself. He knows everyone’s inner thoughts, but keeps them in profound confidence. He has been “always the gentleman,” throughout that time,

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as Esme says. He is the family’s watchman, always vigilant, ever on guard. He is their spokesman, including during tense, difficult, and high-risk situations, which he handles adeptly. He is normally very kind and very patient -- both of which go a long way toward becoming a very good person. He has gone from a selfish, immature human child to a very capable and profoundly altruistic leader among all immortals. But he still hasn’t forgiven himself. “Don’t laugh — but how can you come out during the daytime?” He laughed anyway. “Myth.” “Burned by the sun?” “Myth.” “Sleeping in coffins?” “Myth.”

While he can disregard all other human beliefs about vampires, Edward fears that either Bella will realize the “truth” and run away from him, screaming as she goes, because he is a monster. Or that Bella will die at his own hands. Because he is a monster. Or, that Bella will resent the pain of transformation and hate him for making her like him. Because he is a monster. So not changing Bella, he thinks, is only way to keep her. Or at least, put off her abandoning him. As his mother once did, in death.

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So although Edward is becoming more like Carlisle in many ways, unlike his immortal father, he refuses to change anyone (including Bella). And that includes changing himself. He withdraws from contact with everyone. So, within, he is miserable. He wanders through life as though it is a vast wasteland, fearful of the monster he may become. Fearful of what he has already become. Just like Carlisle did. Except Carlisle left the wilderness, long, long ago. Even though he is surrounded by his loving family and many admirers, all so eager for his attention, hearing their every, constant thought... Edward is so lonely. Because the wilderness Edward wanders in is within himself. And from that wilderness, there is no easy escape. “What is it?” I whispered, touching his frozen face. His face softened under my hand, and he sighed. “I keep waiting for it to happen.” “For what to happen?” “I know that at some point, something I tell you or something you see is going to be too much. And then you’ll run away from me, screaming as you go.” He smiled half a smile, but his eyes were serious. “I won’t stop you. I want this to happen, because I want you to be safe. And yet, I want to be with you. The two desires are impossible to reconcile…” He trailed off, staring at my face. Waiting.

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“I’m not running anywhere,” I promised. “We’ll see,” he said, smiling again.

Behaviors: Edward is the Cullen child who is most like Carlisle, yet he remains unfulfilled. His main emotional state seems to be loneliness. His central irony and contradiction is that he is constantly hearing the thoughts of everyone around him, which mostly seems to make his loneliness worse. In part, this is because he knows how unique his altruistic Worldview is. And so he resents his uniqueness, along with all the selfishness he is surrounded by. But, despite his loneliness, he remains altruistic -- more so over time, because of the love he feels from his family, and Bella. He is their watchman, guardian, and protector (not Emmett, despite his strength; nor Jasper, despite his military background). Consequences: Edward gets the girl, loses the girl (on purpose), and finally gets the girl once and for all. Forever. The “losing girl on purpose” part though, in New Moon, is the real issue. Edward tells Bella, repeatedly, that he should leave her, which would prove his love for her. He says. Unless of course, her life is endangered, and then helping her would be the right thing to do. But Edward was wrong, very wrong, thinking he would help Bella most by completely avoiding her. But Bella

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needs him in her life, as he does her. Yet he threatens this after the Van accident, and briefly in the Meadow, and later in the Phoenix hospital. This relates to his “rebellious stage,” which he casually mentions in the book. And when Edward mentions anything “casually” -- watch out. It’s inevitably something he is incredibly anxious about. Regardless, as a result of his rebelling against the truth, the Consequences of what Edward did haunts him. So he basically thinks he deserves harm. And when life isn’t actually harming him, he tends to harm himself. For instance, by claiming that a separation with Bella would mean he really loved her. Besides its obvious practical problems, that’s also wrong. Because the main thing Edward is refusing to do is communicate with her. And as mentioned before, communication isn’t just part of the relationship -- it is the relationship. Anything short of that -- frequent, full, and open communication -- can change things from a fulfilling personal relationship to... a business arrangement. Yet there are often other people, like the Volturi, who will be happy to tell others that a “business arrangement” type relationship is the only possible option (to support their own harmful Worldviews). But such talk can be overcome. Take Carlisle, for instance. He overcame his own father’s paranoia, the Volturi’s domineering, and his own selfcontrol issues. And he created a truly fulfilling marriage, and family, despite the professions from the Volturi, human, and werewolf cultures claiming that it was impossible to do so.

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Through love, priorities, and self-control, he overcame them all. And has a wonderful life. And now, it’s Edward’s turn. He knows that Carlisle is right. And he wants something more than what his culture offers as a fall-back. But he has trouble believing in that possibility. Trouble believing in himself. Which is something Bella is more than happy to help him with. Because, if nothing else, Bella believes in him. The question is: Who will he listen to? To her, and live well? Together? In a richly and truly joyful relationship? Or to the Volturi’s culture, and run away? Which, of course, is what he will do, in New Moon. Yet that way of thinking -- accepting that he was doomed all along -- brings up the all-important question, “And then what?” And in that question, there may be some pain. But also, always, hope. The hope that he needs to redeem himself. To believe what Bella believed in all along. In himself.

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Shapeshifters The (fictional) Quileute tribe history weighs upon the werewolf pack, and those who work with them. They bear responsibilities that they did not choose, passed down to them by their ancestors (one choice made by one Quileute, in particular). However, their sense of history encourages them to seek meaning in their unusual lives, and in their gifts. Also, for the Blacks and other families in the wolfpack, the absence of a family member, or close friend, may also weigh upon them, and encourage them to make social connections they might not have otherwise. BILLY BLACK Worldview: Billyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s apparent irresponsibilities of the past seem to weigh on him. Diet and other health issues have led to losing use of his legs, through diabetes. He is now something of a burden on his son, and others. Billy also may have cheated on his now-deceased wife, fathering Embry Call. Embryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s real father is unclear, but the serious possibility that Billy may be the father is unsettling. Amd whatever else his past contains, nothing seems to entirely negate that possibility. Even for his own son. He alternates between enormous concerns for possible dangers (talking to vampires), and complete disregard for other ones (skipping school, motorcycling without a helmet, etc.), suggests that he is still coming to terms with his

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present responsibilities, which may be at odds with his past irresponsibilities. In any case, Billy lost his wife. And so, his un-shared responsibilities for his children weigh upon him. His daughters have fled; which he understands is over their motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s loss, but to be clear: When they left, they left him. So Billy is determined to raise his son, Jacob, well. With Jacobâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s special abilities, and in trying to raise his only son, he may be unsure exactly how to handle these responsibilities for the best. And he takes his responsibilities, now, very seriously. Especially as chief of his tribe. Which, it should be noted, is not a play-acting role. It is a serious matter, with abilities to influence others through persuasion and authority. Yet is there a stronger kind of influence? It should probably also be noted that Billy is unemployed. Whatever his former careers entailed, those days seem to be over. Like some others on Native American reservations, Billy is seemingly quite poor (e.g., their transportation issues, broken television, etc.). He lives in a very modest, small home. So Billy is probably is getting by through a combination of government benefits -- Native American stipends, Medicaid, food stamps, disability and/or Social Security. No one lives well on payments like those, which are basically just enough to keep them going. This can weigh on a parent in many ways. Regardless, if Billy Black was once selfish, he isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t anymore.

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Approaches: As chief, Billy is a member of his tribe’s council, and intensely feels his responsibilities. And although he is keeper of their great secret, wearing the small satchel of vampire ashes around his neck each day, he is frustrated by not being a shape-shifter himself. Frustrated by being single. Frustrated by his disabilities. Frustrated by his aging -- aging he wouldn’t go through if he was a shape-shifter. But his responsibilities grant him wisdom, enabling him to Learn from the past. His disabilities grant him kindness, which he shows in his concern for others. And his age grants him patience, which yields influence over all who know him. Behaviors: Billy has a measure of influence on others. Yet his influence is undermined somewhat by his mistrust of others. His mistrust also makes him unnecessarily anxious (over Bella, for instance) and leaves him with a lot of unnecessary grief (over Edward). Whatever his past, Billy seems to have become a very fine chief, a true leader. And not through force or lineage, as the Volturi do. But rather through the respect, regard, and love, that others give him, freely. They do so in return for the respect, regard, and love that he first gave to them. Consequences: Through Billy’s altruistic influence, he teaches others effectively, even though he is not a werewolf himself. He is opening others’ eyes -- including Bella, and

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Jacob -- to important realizations, which in turn leads to his own Learning. Including what the Cullens are really like. Which ultimately brings a lasting peace, not only to him, but to all his people. JACOB BLACK Worldview: Jacob is generally unselfish. Yet he has had a difficult past. And he has an uncertain future. He has lost his mother, and soon after, his sisters left as well. This has left him a little desperate for female affection, especially in comparison with other boys in his social group. Jacob knows that one day the chief’s duties will fall upon him. Despite his hard-working nature, he is wary of taking those on. He fears he will lose himself -- his individuality -- if he aligns himself with the tribe in that way. Perhaps this is because he has lost all the others in his family, and perhaps because his father’s mortality is clearly evident in his disability. So perhaps Jacob sees himself as next, the next person in his family to be “lost.” This is not a casual anxiety. As we know from Breaking Dawn, eventually he will, indeed, go missing. So for now, Jacob latches onto his irresponsibility, which is an extension of his selfishness. Yet, as the saying goes, “the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others,” or in other words, the only reliable source of real satisfaction and lasting joy is through altruism. But Jacob doesn’t seem to recognize that. Yet.

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Unfortunately for him, his relationship with Bella is largely based on their mutual eagerness to be irresponsible (cutting school, motorcycling without helmets, spending her savings); this is how Bella sees the relationship, in any case. Irresponsibility, by its very nature, is self-defeating. So, as Cause and Effect bears down upon them -- meaning the effects of their irresponsible choices, like split foreheads, drained college funds, nearly drowning, and so forth -eventually they will both need to choose responsibility, which threatens to break apart their “irresponsible” relationship, making an already hard choice all the more difficult. Which is about the same point when he escapes into his wolf-form permanently (or so he supposes). Be being afraid of losing himself through selflessness, by refusing to accept his responsibilities unselfishly, is how Jacob actually risks losing himself forever. So, Jacob’s Worldview is... conflicted. Like many people. Approaches: Jacob Approaches his future with uncertainty. His mother is dead, his sisters are gone... So. How about a new, lovely replacement for all those missing women in his life? The re-appearance of Bella -- his future mother (in law) -- caught his immediate attention. Not only that, but Bella represents a possible future that he feels he can actually look forward to. He sees that one day he will be expected to become chief, and is nervous about that responsibility. Further, Jacob has no desire to “rule” over others. In that way, Jacob is kind of the

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anti-Sam -- who seems to be all about his authority. Irresponsibility is way more fun for Jacob at this point than responsibility. Especially since the effects haven’t quite caught up with him (yet). Moreover, Bella enjoys being immature (with him, anyway), too. And right now, Jake doesn’t see any problems with this “plan.” All he knows for sure is that Bella is the one thing he definitely feels good about. But what does that say more about? His feelings for Bella? Or his feelings about the rest of his life? Behaviors: Jacob is also altruistic, and seems always willing to help his father and others with their needs (if not without some complaining). He is really bright and observant, too, which means that he is sensitive to the needs and concerns of others, something that will strengthen his altruism over time. And his relationships with others. Given his early uncertainty about his future, he seems only slightly interested in learning and growing. His failure to learn more keeps him from defeating his uncertainty and fear. So, in terms of his day-to-day Behaviors, it appears that most of the time he is just messing around. Jake does well with mechanical stuff, which keeps him busy and productive, so it’s no wonder that Billy is supportive of him doing that. Bella eventually thinks of Jacob as her mechanic, which is fine, but could he be doing more with his life? He doesn’t know, so he doesn’t try. His growing irresponsibility is leading him away from influence and opportunities to help,

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towards increased selfishness. Which culminates in his explosion into his wolf-form, and disappearance into the north. Consequences: Bella says that there is “her” Jacob -- the Good Jacob -- and then there is the Bad Jacob. Jacob makes some big mistakes. He is worried about “losing himself,” through not only his immortal nature, but also through taking on the responsibilities that life requires. He didn’t have to worry. Responsibilities bring influence. And with responsibility can come growth. Growth in who you are, and what you are capable of doing. So some of Good Jacob’s influence is very positive. He loves, supports, and influences (for good) those around him. But Bad Jacob’s influence is often immature and so, over time, harmful. For example, motorcycle riding without a helmet, is always going to be a bad idea. Bella gets hurt from that. And his irresponsible influence hurts her in other, more serious ways as the series goes on. We will look at those, and his growth and imprinting, in a future book. WOLFPACK Worldview: Generally, the Wolfpack view themselves as naturally immortal, and inheritors of a grand tradition. Traditions can be good or bad, beneficial or harmful. The Wolfpack has both kinds. As protectors of life, they are very altruistic. Which is good. But they are also destroyers of immortal life. Which can be bad (or good), depending.

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So, their willingness to protect life leads them to deal with Carlisle Cullen, who is also trying to protect life. But the other side of their traditions keep them from really seeing Carlisleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s devotion to life itself. Tradition is generally thought of as strength, which is a good thing, but it can be changed into a stubbornness and unwillingness to change. In their dealings with Carlisle, their unwillingness to accept change becomes weakness, and their tendency towards violence (even to defend others) can lead to harmful Consequences. Even among themselves. This is, perhaps, one reason for imprinting among the Wolfpack. Like the vampires, the wolvesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; traditions lead them to not accept change easily. Perhaps even including falling in love. Approaches: The Wolfpack is all about one thing. Duty, duty, duty. Yet fulfilling oneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s duty has as much (or more) to do with knowing when not to use, say, murderous force, as it does with knowing when to use it. Unfortunately, their deep concern over vampires (and other personal issues, probably), makes them prone to overreaction. Their pack-mind makes that even worse because all of their worries are mixed together in a tangle. So often their Approaches go too far, and/or become too unfocused. This same tendency to over-react arises in many areas of their lives, including picking fights, exploding in anger, etc. The central contradiction of the Wolfpack is that even

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though they follow traditions which are absolutely ancient, their actual Approaches are often wildly immature. Behaviors: With vampires, the Wolfpack’s core Behaviors are to “kill first; ask questions later.” Like Sam himself, they feel a great deal of superiority over others. In the day-to-day, they assume a measure of “rule” over humanity, immortals, and werewolves alike. They aren’t like the Volturi, really, but there are some uncomfortable parallels. Also, they are like Emmett in a sense; proud of their strength, to the point of being foolhardy. In general, they can act short-sighted, reactionary, and often, their secrecy (like the Volturi’s) can be counter-productive, limiting their influence among their tribe and vampires alike, including the Cullen family. Consequences: The Wolfpack’s arrogance is self-defeating. Order, in general, is a good thing. And sometimes a hierarchy is a good way to sustain that order. But when that hierarchy defends its influence by becoming overly controlling, the order itself -- its underlying purpose -- begins to be destroyed. True leadership is based in service (and the respect that comes from serving others), not via force or control. So, Sam’s wolfpack is doomed to break apart from the start. It eventually does, but their best natures -- to protect life -- win out, in the end. Their altruism leads to maturity mixed with compassion, which is the foundation of true leadership.

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For the first time, in their very long history, under Samâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s watch -- and Jacobâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newfound responsibility to protect life -- a true peace with vampires is established. Aro, and undoubtedly all vampires -- will stay far, far away from the Quileute Reservation. Forever. Except, of course, for their friends and partners in protecting and safeguarding life, the Cullens.

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Paintings Klimt, “The Kiss”

Dicksee, “Romeo and Juliet”

Waterhouse, “Miranda, the Tempest”

Parrish, “Ecstasy”

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Leighton, “Flaming June”

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Van Gogh, “Interior of a Restaurant”

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Waterhouse, “Windswept”

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Monet, “Sous Bois”

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Degas, “At the Barre”

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Moran, “An Arizona Sunset Near the Grand Canyon”

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Fragonard, “Young Girl Reading” 206 Von Stuck, “Angel with Flaming Sword” 211 Solimena, “Dido Receiving Aeneas* and Cupid, Disguised as Ascanius”

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Klimt, “Meadow with Poppies”

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Courbet, “Forest Landscape”

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Von Kowalski-Wierusz, “The Wolf”

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