Leo issue 3

Page 1

Leo

Newton South High School

June 2013 Volume 1, Issue 3

140 Brandeis Rd, Newton MA 02459

Leo Volume 1, Issue 3

|

June 2013

3 | Editor’s Desk 4 | APERTURE <\]MNV\ XQW\WPZJXQa ONJ\]ZN

Politics 9 | Rubble and Ruin The American misconception of the War in Iraq by Ella Belfer

Community

18 | The Frait Express ã LZR\RLJT TWWS J\ @QR\[WV[ -]TTRVJZa 1ZW]X by Daniel Kaufman 22 | Shades of Irony ;N NL\RVP WV 8<2< 6NWs[ ;WJZ JVM RZWVa J\ <W]\Q by Rose Taylor

24 | Finding Common Ground =QN RUXWZ\JVLN WO XNZ[WVJTRbRVP \ZJPNMa by Courtney Foster

Culture 10 | Workaholics Anonymous 2W_ J K]VLQ WO TW[NZ[ JZN ZNMN VRVP LWUNMa by Andrew Dembling 12 | No Mirrors, Just Smoke The riddle of Tarantino’s alternate histories by Jamie Rinaldi

14 | World Wide Wes The most powerful man in professional basketball by Jacob Jaffe 16 | Tacqwacore in the USA The rise of Islamic punk rock by Chris Connell

Reflections 28 | Prelude to Philosophy of the Future 8RN\b[LQN RV \QN [\ LNV\]Za by Michelino Kenny

Diversions SATIRE 34 | The Stembridge Sword 8N_\WV <W]\Qs[ [NLWVM UW[\ \Z][\NM [W]ZLN by Connor Donahue & Dylan Cloud

-81( /(2

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Leo Senior Staff

Editors-�in-�Chief: Yoonchan Choi, Daniel Kaufman and Sophie Scharlin-�Pettee Managing Editors: Daniel Barabasi, Wendy Ma and Nicholas Reed Faculty Advisor: David Weintraub

Content Ella  Belfer Dylan  Cloud Chris  Connell Andrew  Dembling Connor  Donahue Courtney  Foster Jacob  Jaffe Daniel  Kaufman Michelino  Kenny Rose  Taylor

Visual Dina  Bedri Esther  Chang Jordan  Cohen-Kaplan Adam  DeAngelo Melanie  Kim Amanda  Liu Vivian  Liu Jonathan  Stricker Ethan  Wehrwein Yaara  Yacoby

Copy  Editors Andreas  Betancourt Jenny  Friedland Jenny  Morris Emma  Race Distribution  Manager Ae  Sook  Ghyo

6NW  is  a  quarterly  news  magazine  produced  entirely  by  students  of  Newton  South  High  School.  The  goal  of  the  publication  is  to  provide  the  best  writing  the  student  body  has  to  offer  and  promote  discussion  about  important  global  and  local  issues.  Advertising  that  endorses  any  substance  illegal  for  teenage  purchase  will  not  be  sold.  Political  advertisements  NVMWZ[RVP J [XNLR L XJZ\a LJVMRMJ\N WZ R[[]N _RTT VW\ KN JLLNX\NM 6NW  reserves  the  right  to  withhold  publication  of  any  unpaid  advertisement  or  any  advertisement  denied  by  majority  decision  of  the  Gahanna-Jefferson  Board  of  Education.   Letters  should  be  turned  in  no  later  than  two  weeks  after  the  previous  issue. 6NW  reserves  the  right  to  edit  all  letters  OWZ [XJLN JVM LWV\NV\ 6N\\NZ[ UJa KN MZWXXNM WOO RV ;WWU PR^NV \W J 6NW [\JOO UNUKNZ WZ [NV\ ^RJ NUJRT \W TNW [NVRWZ[\JOO+PUJRT LWU

Editor’s Desk Volume 1, Issue 3 Kids just don’t care

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e’re back. 8W\ \W _WZZa ZNJMNZ[ _N QJ^N included a paper airplane template in the back of the book. As J [RMN VW\N R\s[ KN[\ \W â][\ \NJZ WOO \QN cover for maximum wingspan. And for those of you who only read The <\NUKZRMPN <_WZM R\s[ J\ \QN KJLS WO \QN KWWS OWZ aW] \WW 3O aW] PW W]\ N^NZa OZNN KTWLS W]Z 7RPQ\a <]K[ JM JT[W RV the back) is sure to pique your interest. 3O aW] UJMN R\ XJ[\ \QN Z[\ XJZJPZJXQ _N XZWUR[N \W [NZUWVRbN no longer. Readability has always been J XZRWZR\a K]\ JO\NZ \_W R[[]N[ \QJ\ spent more time on the boat from 5WZNJ \QJV RV ZNJMNZ[s QJVM[ _N MNLRMNM \W NJ[N \QRVP[ ]X _R\Q [QWZ\NZ sharper articles. 0WZ \QW[N [\RTT ]VJXXNJ[NM QNZN R[ WVN VJT LWV[WTJ\RWV% =QR[ _RTT KN Volume One’s last issue. In a matter of UWV\Q[ W]Z XNZ[N^NZJ\RVP _RTT KN J thing of the past. 4WSN[ J[RMN \QR[ R[ \QN NVM WO 6NW Volume One. As we begin our MNXJZ\]ZN OZWU <W]\Q _N ONNT R\s[ important to return 6NW \W \QN [LQWWT placing an emphasis on content that JXXTRN[ \W <W]\Q aN\ TNJMRVP \QN ZNJMNZ to ask questions about issues larger \QJV <W]\Q 3V \QN Z[\ \_W R[[]N[ \QN latter point was far overstated. On a XNMN[\JT WO KRP _WZM[ JVM TWVP JZ\RLTN[ _N OWZPW\ \_W ^NZa RUXWZ\JV\ \QRVP[% W]Z J]MRNVLN JVM \QJ\ MN[XR\N W]Z KN[\ _R[QN[ _N JZN VW\ RV OJL\ The 8N_ BWZSNZ ã[ J [\JOO _N _W]TM TRSN to think that this mistake was overN`]KNZJVLN JVM VW\ XZN\NV[RWV K]\

that is for our readers to decide. Enough of the past; on to Issue Three. Somewhere amidst the hallways of South rife with testosterone and low self-esteem lurk worthy targets. Beyond the hackneyed issues of drunk MZR^RVP LWTTNPN [N` LQNJ\RVP [JON\a JVM [N` TRN XZWKTNU[ \QJ\ \Z]Ta JOONL\ W]Z [LQWWT 8W_ \QJ\s[ VW\ \W [Ja \QJ\ those aforementioned issues don’t N`R[\& ZJ\QNZ \QNa JZN VW\ \QN R[[]N[ \QJ\ deserve coverage in 6NW. Perhaps at the forefront of these lurking topics is the controversial takeover of Newton Public Schools’ food [NZ^RLN Ka @QR\[WV[ -]TRVJZa 1ZW]X a decision that was initially met with some opposition but has otherwise been largely forgotten. But is it ethical to put taxpayer money into a corporation that is facing multi-million dollar lawsuits? Should we consume food from a company that sends that same food to prisons? Is it ethical to cut the KNVN \[ WO _WZSNZ[ _QW QJ^N KNNV RV the school system for over 30 years? Part of Whitsons’ contract with 8:< R[ J VWV LWUXN\N LTJ][N _QRLQ prevents students from giving out or selling food items during school hours with the exception of J-Block. ãVM [W \QN ZNLNV\ \ZNVM WO RV[RVLNZR\a JVM N`JPPNZJ\NM RZWVa ZN NL\NM RV QRPQ XZW TN \QNJ\ZRL[ TRSN ,JSN <JTN -T]Ks[ @J\NZ -JOÆ QJ^N KNNV JLLNX\NM without the realization of the desire to pursue the larger meaning. The Water -JOÆ [J\RZRbN[ \QR[ ZNTJ\RWV[QRX _R\Q J menu composed only of different types of water. While the actions of Bake Sale Club are certainly objectionable RV \QNRZ W^NZ[J\]ZJ\NM RZWVa \QN ZWW\

of its activities call attention to a fundamental problem we face at South. @R\Q \QR[ LWZXWZJ\N \JSNW^NZ 8:< administrators ignored a crucial aspect of extracurricular operation. While controversial decisions J\ <W]\Q UJa RVLR\N LWV^NZ[J\RWV rarely do they incite meaningful student participation. This pattern is a dangerous one and needs to be broken WZ J\ \QN ^NZa TNJ[\ JMMZN[[NM @N need to change how we interact with the school not only by questioning administrative and student actions but also by working toward a solution to the problems these actions might pose. The answer to these issues may not materialize while Volume One still plasters the halls of South. We hope that 6NW _RTT KN \QN ^NQRLTN OWZ \QR[ LQJVPN% a venue to promote transparency and knowledge about the issues that affect [\]MNV\[ ã[ ?WT]UN 9VN [RPV[ WOO J new staff steps up to develop a new identity for 6NW.

Nicholas Reed Managing Editor -81( /(2

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Aperture .J^RM \QN LZNJ\WZ Jonathan Stricker

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Man in the airport By Francesca Sands

-81( /(2

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! !!! " !

Politics Rubble  and  Ruin The  American  Misconception  of  the  War  in  Iraq By  Ella  Belfer diers  on  raids  and  shaky  videos  shot  in  \QN MNX\Q WO VRPQ\ 3ZJY R[ VW UWZN \QJV =QN 3ZJY @JZ =QN L]T\]ZN \QN QR[\WZa the  traditions  of  centuries  don’t  make  R\ RV\W \QN[N VN_[ [\WZRN[ MNJ\Q \WTT[ or  cost  analyses.  So  when  the  headline  â€œ60  dead  in  car  bombâ€?  scrolls  across  the  KW\\WU WO \QN [LZNNV \QNZN JZN VW OWW\QWTM[ 3\ R[ MRO L]T\ \W JMMZN[[ \QN LWVMR\RWV[ \QJ\ KZNNM \NZZWZR[U \W [WW\QN MNLJMN[ WO N\QVRL \NV[RWV[ ZNTRPRW][ \NV[RWV[ JVM [WLRN\JT \NV[RWV[ 3\ R[ OJZ easier  to  just  label  a  young  Arab  man  a  â€œterrorist.â€? The  terrorists  we  see  on  television  JZNVs\ â][\ 3ZJYRx\QNasZN <J]MR :JTN[\RVRJV BNUNVR WZ UWZN WO\NV â][\ ^JP]NTa ĂŁZJK =QNa TNJ^N KNQRVM UN[[JPN[ TTNM _R\Q XZJR[N[ WO ĂŁTTJQ JVM \QZNJ\[ \W \QN entire  American  population.  Bombarded  by  these  faces  from  our  television  [LZNNV[ MJa RV JVM MJa W]\ _N KNLWUN ingrained  with  certain  misconceptions.  @N KNPRV \W \QRVS JTT ĂŁZJK[ JZN 7][TRU and  all  Muslims  Arabs.  We  begin  to  \QRVS \QJ\ \QN[N []RLRMN KWUKNZ[ \QN[N JP K]ZVRVP UNV JZN ZNXZN[NV\J\R^N WO J TJZPNZ _QWTN ĂŁO\NZ JTT \QNa QJ^N KNcome  the  face  of  Islam  in  the  media. 9^NZ \QN XJ[\ aNJZ[ 3[TJU QJ[ grown  to  occupy  the  lion’s  share  of  reports  on  religion  in  the  media.  The  UJâWZR\a WO \QN[N [\WZRN[ QW_N^NZ LJ[\ Muslims  in  a  negative  light.  In  a  coun\Za _QNZN JLLWZMRVP \W 1JTT]X W^NZ ! percent  of  people  surveyed  admitted  to  knowing  â€œlittle  or  nothingâ€?  about  3[TJU \QR[ UNMRJ XWZ\ZJaJT KNLWUN[ MJVPNZW][ 4][\ J[S ;JVMWTXQ 6RVV the  man  responsible  for  the  arson  of  a  UW[Y]N RV =WTNMW 9QRW @QNV J[SNM RO QN SVN_ _QJ\ 3[TJU _J[ QN ZN[XWVMNM t8W 3 WVTa SVW_ _QJ\ 3 QNJZ WV Fox  News  and  what  I  hear  on  radio  [...]  Muslims  are  killing  Americans  and  trying  to  blow  stuff  up  [...]  Most  Muslims  are  terrorists  and  don’t  believe  in  Jesus  Christ.â€?  While  his  might  be  an  extreme Â

LJ[N R\ R[ VW\ JV R[WTJ\NM WVN <\WZRN[ WO JZ[WV[ WO UW[Y]N[ WO QJ\N LZRUN[ JPJRV[\ 7][TRU[ WO \QN RUXW[[RKRTR\a of  obtaining  permits  to  build  Islamic  LNV\NZ[ MWVs\ WO\NV UJSN \QN VN_[ K]\ they  are  a  rampantly  growing  problem  within  our  own  borders. ĂŁ\ <W]\Q _N \NVM \W \QRVS \QJ\ ethnic  misconception  is  one  of  those  problems  that  resides  far  outside  our  _NTT NM]LJ\NM TRKNZJT LWUU]VR\a =QRVS JPJRV 6J[\ aNJZ \QN [QWZ\ TR^NM Muslim  Student  Association  put  up  J XW[\NZ% t@QJ\ MW aW] J[[WLRJ\N _R\Q the  word  â€˜Islam’?â€?  Pausing  to  catch  my  KZNJ\Q JO\NZ \QZNN RPQ\[ WO [\JRZ[ \QN poster  caught  my  eye.  Numerous  hands  had  scrawled  their  answers  across  the  XJPN t=NZZWZR[\ $ \NZZWZR[U QRâJK suicide  bombingsâ€?  and  variations  \QNZNWO TR\\NZNM \QN [QNN\ 3 ZNJM R\ JPJRV just  to  make  sure  that  in  a  school  with  J L]ZZRL]T]U WV 3[TJU _R\Q 7][TRU [\]MNV\[ \QR[ _J[ VW\ [WUN [RLS QJTlucination.  -]ZTNM ]X WV Ua LW]LQ 3sU [\JZRVP J\ \QN \NTN^R[RWV N`XNL\RVP J ZNXWZ\ WV 3ZJY \NV aNJZ[ JO\NZ \QN _JZ 9VN LWUUNZLRJT KZNJS XJ[[N[ \QNV JVW\QNZ JVM JTT 3 QNJZ JZN OJL\[ JVM P]ZN[ 0WZ J OZJL\RWV WO J [NLWVM J XRL\]ZN WO J TR\\TN Iraqi  girl  scrolls  behind  the  reporter’s  QNJM =QNV [QNs[ PWVN JVM \QN JVLQWZ begins  a  piece  on  March  Madness.

illustration by Dina Bedri

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’m  watching  a  news  story  \R\TNM t3ZJY% =NV BNJZ[ 6J\er.â€?  I’m  expecting  a  report  JKW]\ 3ZJY aNJZ[ JO\NZ \QN war. 3V[\NJM \QN VN_[ JVLQWZ R[ aing  up  a  Colorado  mountainside  in  a  PWVMWTJ RV\NZ^RN_RVP J OWZUNZ ^N\NZJV 3UXWZ\JV\ aN[ K]\ J[ \QN RV\NZ^RN_ MZJP[ WV 3sU [\RTT _JR\RVP \W QNJZ JKW]\ Iraq’s  post-war  reality.  The  program  cuts  \W LWUUNZLRJT 3 [R\ \_RMMTRVP Ua VPNZ[ [RPQ ĂŁ[ \QN XZWPZJU ZN\]ZV[ \QN JVchor  launches  into  death  tolls  and  its  cost  to  the  American  taxpayer.  The  only  glimpses  of  Iraq  in  the  entire  piece  are  the  videos  scrolling  by  in  the  backPZW]VM WO 2][[NRV WO [WTMRNZ[ ZW]VMRVP ]X RV[]ZPNV\[ WO [\ZNN\[ \]ZVNM \W rubble.  The  anchor  pauses  to  ask  the  Y]N[\RWV WO \QN MJa% t@QJ\ QJ^N _N learned  from  the  Iraq  War?â€?  @NTT _QJ\ QJ^N _N TNJZVNM* 8W\ U]LQ RO \QN[N [WZ\ WO XZWPZJU[ JZN our  sole  source  of  information.  Suicide  KWUKRVP[ \NV aNJZ[ JPW JVM []RLRMN KWUKRVP[ \WMJa RV [RLS LWUUNUWZJtion  of  the  anniversary.  In  the  ten  years  between?  Gut-wrenching  images  of  ZN[ [N\ RV \QN [\ZNN\[ UNVJLRVP [RPV[ ĂŁUNZRLJV JP[ JTRPQ\ QW][N[ ZNM]LNM \W M][\ [WTMRNZ[s LJ[SN\[ JVM _NNXRVP American  families.  These  are  the  images  of  the  Iraq  War. <QW]TM _N MRP J TR\\TN MNNXNZ WZ ^JZa W]Z [W]ZLN[ J KR\ \QN [\WZRN[ begin  to  diverge  drastically.  The  mothers  weeping  on  the  television  are  Iraqi  J[ _NTT J[ ĂŁUNZRLJV ZNO]PNN[ QJ^N VW QWUN[ \W ZN\]ZV \W JVM J LW]V\Za struggles  with  a  decimated  infrastruc\]ZN <]MMNVTa \QN _JZ KNPRV[ \W [NNU a  lot  more  complex.  Our  troops  are  LWURVP QWUN K]\ QJ^N \QNa _WV* ĂŁVM _QJ\ WO \QN 3ZJYR XNWXTN _QW _NZN XZWUR[NM MNUWLZJLa [\JKRTR\a OZNNMWU* For  an  American  whose  only  associations  with  Iraq  are  images  of  sol-

Workaholics  Anonymous  2W_ J ,]VLQ WO 6W[NZ[ JZN ;NMN VRVP -WUNMa ,a% ãVMZN_ .NUKTRVP

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omedy  Central’s  biggest  hit  RV ZNLNV\ aNJZ[ Workaholics,  has  taken  hold  of  many  adolescents  across  the  nation.  â€œGet  weirdâ€?  and  â€œtight  K]\\QWTNu JZN JUWVP MWbNV[ WO _WZM[ XQZJ[N[ JVM QJ[Q\JP[ \QJ\ \QN [QW_ has  introduced  into  the  vernacular.  Following  the  lives  of  20-something  â€œdudeKZW[u ĂŁMJU .N7JUX ĂŁMJU .N^RVN ĂŁVMNZ[ 2WTU^RS ĂŁVMNZ[ 2WTU JVM ,TJSN 2NVMNZ[WV ,TJSN ĂŁVMNZ[WV x who  also  run  the  show  along  with  \QNRZ OZRNVM 5aTN 8N_JLQNS _QW QJ[ a  minor  role  as  their  drug  dealer—the  premise  is  hardly  original.  Judd  Apa\W_ OWZ RV[\JVLN OW]VM PZNJ\ []LLN[[

_R\Q \QR[ OWZU]TJ RV QR[ URM TU[ But  the  tone  and  humor  of  Workaholics,  while  somewhat  contrived  and  JUJ\N]ZR[Q ONNT[ OZN[Q JVM QNJZ\ONT\ RV a  way  that  is  completely  current  and  modern. >V[]ZXZR[RVPTa t\QN P]a[u QJ^N their  roots  in  Internet  comedy.  Their  BW]=]KN LQJVVNT 7JRT 9ZMNZ -WUNMa R[ J\ KN[\ UNMRWLZN 3\ R[ O]TT WO [SN\LQN[ \QJ\ JZN RVLZNMRKTa RV[RPVR LJV\ JVM LWWSRN L]\\NZ% ZJXXRVP _RbJZM[ X[N]MW =RU JVM /ZRL N[Y]N LWUUNZLRJT[ [WVP XJZWMRN[ <RUXTa X]\ \QNa LWUN off  as  amateurish  and  untalented. ĂŁVM aN\ \QNa QJ^N J LNZ\JRV LQJZU \QJ\ R[ RV VR\NTa UWZN JXXJZNV\ in  Workaholics  than  it  is  online.  While  \QN âWSN[ JZN TJZPNTa \QN [JUN \QNa N^NV recycled  the  rapping  wizard  joke  OWZ WVN WO \QNRZ NXR[WMN[ \QN context  of  the  sitcom  allows  them  to  deliver  the  jokes  as  a  character  rather  than  through  the  more  formal  â€œWe  are  trying  to  make  you  laughâ€?  format  of  a  YouTube  channel.  The  show  achieves  something  Apatow’s  movRN[ VN^NZ ZNJTTa LW]TM% _QRTN aN[ \QN LQJZJL\NZ[ JZN TJba [\WVNZ[ they  are  not  losers  for  the  sake  of  being  losers. Â

Though  slightly  less  biting  and  sub[\JV\RJTTa TN[[ O]VVa \QNa LWUN JLZW[[ J[ U]LQ UWZN PNV]RVN JVM QWVN[\ P]ZN[ BN[ \QN âWSN[ JZN KJM JVM aN[ \QN hashtags  on  the  bottom  of  the  screen  MW JTUW[\ [QW]\ t=QR[ _WZM R[ O]VVa VW_ TJ]PQ u R\ JTT JMM[ \W \QN JTT]ZN JVM realness  of  the  characters.  Jokes  within  friend  groups  are  seldom  funny  to  othNZ[ J[ \QN [QW_ XZW^N[ JVM \QNa JZN often  contrived.  This  helps  the  show  gain  directness  and  sincerity;  the  barrier  between  the  camera  and  the  living  ZWWU R[ \QRVVNM JVM _N \QN ^RN_NZ[ are  effectively  invited  to  hang  out  with  the  â€œdude-bros.â€? This  effect  is  likely  attributable  \W \QN P]a[s 3V\NZVN\ KJLSPZW]VM 8W they  had  not  mastered  the  craft  of  In\NZVN\ Q]UWZ K]\ \QNRZ KJLSPZW]VM RV J NTM [W MNUWLZJ\RL J[ \QN 3V\NZVN\ allows  them  to  be  much  more  frank  and  direct  with  their  audience.  Why  Comedy  Central  executives  decided  to  XRLS \QNU R[ J Ua[\NZa K]\ \QNRZ LQWRLN \W [NJZLQ OWZ WVTRVN \JTNV\ _J[ MN VR\NTa a  step  in  the  right  direction.  They  realRbNM JTWVP _R\Q \QN ZN[\ WO ][ \QJ\ \QN 3V\NZVN\ R[ QNZN \W [\Ja JVM _R\Q R\ VW\ only  the  America’s  Funniest  Home  Videos-type  clips  broadcasted  on  Tosh.0 but  also  a  much  broader  democratization  and  personalization  of  humor  at  large. =QN 3V\NZVN\ QJ[ RV ]NVLNM VW\ WVTa \QN Q]UWZ WO \NTN^R[RWV K]\ \QN format  as  well.  Some  of  Comedy  Cen\ZJTs[ VN_N[\ [QW_[ []LQ J[ 5Na :NNTN and  5ZWTT <QW_ JZN KZWJM ^RZJT ^RMNW esque  sketch  comedies.  That  pick-andchoose  Internet  nature  is  slowly  usherRVP \QN [R\LWU RV\W WK[WTN[LNVLN LJ][ing  the  networks  to  realize  what  works  KN[\% [QWZ\ LTRX[ \QJ\ LJV KN XW[\NM WV YouTube  to  help  the  show  go  viral.  Like  their  tactics  regarding  Workaholics  â€”  the  hashtags  constantly  loom  at  \QN KW\\WU WO \QN [LZNNV XZW^RMRVP \QN

show  with  its  own  viral  hits. 6W]RN WV 0A is  another  sitcom  that  exists  because  of  the  Internet.  LouR[ -5 \QN [\JZ JVM [QW_Z]VVNZ [\JZ\NM as  a  stand-up  comic  and  gained  a  lot  of  his  fame  from  YouTube.  When  he  KNLJUN OJUW][ QR[ LWUNMa _J[ ^J[\Ta different  from  that  of  other  comics;  he  brought  with  him  an  air  of  vulnerability  to  the  stage.  He  was  more  willing  \W UJSN âJK[ J\ QRU[NTO \QJV J\ [WLRN\a unlike  comics  George  Carlin  or  Jerry  Seinfeld  before  him.  Since  the  Internet  itself  is  a  much  more  personal  experience  than  televi[RWV QR[ ZNTJ\JKTN JVM KR\RVP LWUNMa has  become  extremely  popular.  He  never  would  have  gained  any  traction  on  television  without  the  Internet  â€”  his  character  is  too  distant  from  the  lateVRPQ\ TNJMRVP UJV XNZ[WVJ OWZ JVa network  to  risk  giving  him  a  chance. The  Internet  is  not  wholly  responsible  for  this  transformation.   Mainstream  entertainment  has  been  distancing  itself  from  the  more  oligarLQRL [a[\NU[ WO 2WTTa_WWM VN\_WZS television  and  radio  for  the  past  few Â

decades.  Comedy  used  to  be  much  UWZN LNV\ZJTRbNM% WVN WO J QJVMO]T WO late-night  hosts  would  come  on  camera  and  tell  jokes  to  the  masses  for  cheap  TJ]PQ[ <\JVM ]X LWUNMa RV N[[NVLN R[ J PZNJ\ ZN NL\RWV WO \QR[ OWZUJ\% WVN revered  individual  goes  onstage  and  preaches  his  wisdom  to  the  crowd  in  \QN OWZU WO ZNQNJZ[NM OWZU]TJ\NM âWSN[ BN\ 6W]R[ -5 QRU[NTO ZN NL\[ a  shift  in  the  dynamic;  while  his  act  R[ LTNJZTa XZN_ZR\\NV QN JOONL\[ J much  more  natural  and  direct  manner.  Unlike  the  Jerry  <NRVONTM[ KNOWZN QRU QN puts  on  less  of  an  act  and  is  not  afraid  to  be  a  schlub.  This  seemingly  less-distinguished  evolution  of  entertainment  _J[ KWZV RV \QN $$ [ JVM [ _QNV [QW_[ like =QN 9O LN attempted  \W NU]TJ\N J TN[[ OWZUJT more  character-based  comNMa JVM 3VMRN J[ WXXW[NM to  Independent)  Cinema  -81( ‡ /(2

11

illustrations by Esther Chang

grew  in  popularity.  Media  like  The  Of LN N[\JKTR[QNM J XTJaRVP NTM RV _QRLQ the  characters  are  no  longer  larger  than  life.  They  are  normal  people  doing  norUJT \QRVP[ =Q][ _N QJ^N JZZR^NM J\ J largely  Internet-dominated  dynamic  of  entertainment  in  which  viewers  resent  condescension;  the  viewer  and  entertainer  are  on  a  level  plane. While  this  trend  acts  as  an  antithesis  to  the  â€œthesisâ€?  of  earlier  broadLJ[\RVP JVM UNMRJ Workaholics  marks  a  Hegelian  synthesis  between  the  two.  The  comedy  is  very  character-based  and  QJ[ TR\\TN XZN\NV[N aN\ \QN âWSN[ JZN MNTRKNZJ\N N^NV [WUN_QJ\ LWV\ZR^NM 6RSN =QN 9O LN \QN[N JZN VWZUJT P]a[ MWRVP VWZUJT \QRVP[% XZRUJZRTa PWRVP \W work.  But  the  deliberateness  of  many  of  the  jokes  remind  us  that  the  alienatRVP aN\ [\RTT XZWURVNV\ NV\NZ\JRVUNV\ of  yore  does  have  its  value.  The  jokes  are  VW\ PZJVM K]\ \QNasZN PNV]RVN JVM NJZVN[\ [\]XRM TR\\TN XQZJ[N[ TRSN tXWZVWPu JVM tNâJL u =QN QJ[Q\JP[ _QRTN N[[NV\RJTTa â][\ UJZSN\RVP [NZ^N J[ J LWV[\JV\ reminder  that  these  jokes  are  for  you;  aW] LJV [QJZN \QNU WV \_R\\NZ \NTT \QNU to  your  friends.  The  jokes  are  no  longer  \QNRZ[% \QNa KNTWVP \W \QN XNWXTN

nO mIrRoRs, jUsT sMoKe The  Riddle  of  Tarantino’s  Alternate  Histories By  Jamie  Rinaldi

I

n  the  intimate  relationship  between  our  present  and  our  his\WZa WVN LJV VN^NZ W^NZLWUN the  fundamental  estrangement  between  the  two.  Historians  can  [QJXN JT\NZ JVM ZN^R[N \QN _ZR\\NV \ZJV[LZRX\[ WO QR[\WZa K]\ OWZ JTT \QNRZ LZJO\[UJV[QRX \QN _WZTM WO \QN XJ[\ R[ ]Vtouchable  to  us  all.  What  is  remembered  and  interpreted  in  the  present  can  be  LQJVPNM K]\ \QN XJ[\ JT_Ja[ ZNUJRV[ N`JL\Ta \QJ\% RUUWKRTN XNZUJVNV\ MR[tant  and  dead. It  has  long  been  part  of  the  modern  imagination  to  reawaken  the  past  and  rearrange  outcomes.  In  the  novel  7JSRVP 2R[\WZa $$! J]\QWZ <\NXQNV 0Za J[S[ ][ \W LWVOZWV\ \QR[ XZW[XNL\% the  possibility  of  altering  history.  0Zas[ XZW\JPWVR[\[ J [LRNV\R[\ \QJ\ has  invented  a  primitive  form  of  time  travel  and  a  graduate  student  specializRVP RV TJ\N $th  century  Austrian  village  TRON LWV[XRZN \W XWR[WV \QN _J\NZ []Xply  of  Adolf  Hitler’s  hometown  in  the  months  prior  to  his  conception.  =QNRZ XTW\ ]T\RUJ\NTa _WZS[ JVM the  world  is  remade.  Adolf  Hitler  is  nevNZ KWZV QN VN^NZ TNJM[ \QN 8JbR :JZ\a and  he  never  becomes  the  tyrannical  P]ZN \QJ\ []Kâ]PJ\N[ /]ZWXN \W \QN near-incomprehensible  brutality  forever Â

associated  with  his  name. After  Stephen  Fry’s  protagonists  in  7JSRVP 2R[\WZa effectively  sterilize  2R\TNZs[ OJ\QNZ \QN PZJM]J\N [\]MNV\ J_JSNV[ RV JV NV\RZNTa VN_ _WZTM JV alternate  reality  where  there  is  no  record  of  an  Adolf  Hitler.  He  is  so  ecstatically  curious  about  his  achievement  that  he  seeks  out  a  history  of  the  20th  LNV\]Za WVTa \W VM \QJ\ JV N^NV UWZN competent  German  dictator  led  the  Third  Reich  to  victory  in  World  War  II.  German  scientists  ultimately  discovered  the  poisoned  water  the  protagonists  deposited  in  Austria  half  a  century  before  and  used  the  concoc\RWV \W LJZZa W]\ J [TW_NZ K]\ ]T\RUJ\NTa more  complete  genocide  of  European  Jewry.  This  alternate  world  is  far  more  racist  and  far  more  belligerent.  The  >VR\NM <\J\N[ R[ [\RTT PQ\RVP 1NZUJVa and  the  civil  rights  struggles  of  the  mid-20th  century  never  emerge  under  the  cloud  of  permanent  war.  The  calculation  failed. Fry’s  case  is  not  to  excuse  Hitler  as  a  best-case  scenario  but  to  point  out  the  vast  interplay  between  contingent  events  that  yield  a  given  historical  outcome.  Adolf  Hitler  was  just  one  piece  of  a  vastly  intertwined  web  that  led  EuZWXN MW_V []LQ J QWZZR LJTTa MN[\Z]L-

tive  path.  Grappling  with  the  consequences  of  Fry’s  historical  intervention  is  both  highly  provocative  and  deeply  necessary. 3V QR[ TJ[\ \_W TU[ ĂĄ]NV\RV Tarantino  has  confronted  this  same  RUJPRVJZa XZWXW[R\RWV% \W \ZJ^NT KJLS RV \RUN JT\NZ \QN XJ[\ JVM ZRPQ\ QR[\WZRLJT wrongs.  In 3VPTW]ZRW][ ,J[\NZM[ $ he  creates  an  alternate  vision  of  the  Second  World  War  where  a  group  of  4N_R[Q LWV[XRZJ\WZ[ VJUNTa 7NTJVRN Laurant’s  Shoshana  and  a  group  of  Jewish-American  commandos  led  by  Brad  Pitt)  ultimately  trap  the  highest  ranking  UNUKNZ[ WO \QN 8JbR :JZ\a RVLT]MRVP Hitler)  in  a  Paris  cinema  and  burn  the  building  it  to  the  ground.  With  .âJVPW >VLQJRVNM he  imagines  an  alternate  antebellum  American  South  where  a  recently  freed  [TJ^N XTJaNM Ka 4JURN 0W`` RV T\ZJ\N[ a  notorious  slave  owner’s  plantation  in  7R[[R[[RXXR OZNN[ QR[ NV[TJ^NM _RON JVM destroys  the  manor  house  along  with  nearly  every  white  person  in  sight.  Built  in  a  mold  of  heroic  mytholWPa NJLQ TUs[ VJZZJ\R^N JZL ZW]PQTa mirrors  the  other’s.  The  heroes  of  both  TU[ QJ^N TW^NM WVN[ \JSNV J_Ja OZWU them  by  a  systemic  evil  that  is  personi-

NM RV \QN N[Q% -QZR[\WXQ @JT\bs[ 4N_ hunter  in  Basterds  and  Leonardo  DiCaprio’s  plantation  owner  in  .âJVPW.  These  heroes  travel  great  distances  \W VM \QNRZ NVNURN[ VJ^RPJ\RVP J TJKarinthine  world  that  is  as  much  historical  as  it  is  Tarantino’s  own  cinematic  mosaic.  Once  they  confront  their  enemies  OJLN \W OJLN \QN QNZWN[ ZNJTRbN \QNRZ ^NVPNJVLN RV [XNL\JL]TJZ VNJZ QJTT]LRVJtory  displays  of  blood  and  gore.  3O \QN NJZTRNZ XWZ\RWV[ WO \QN TU[ are  highly  controlled  exercises  in  charJL\NZ MN^NTWXUNV\ JVM ^NZKJT [XJZZRVP the  conclusions  unleash  a  near  apocalyptic  reckoning  upon  characters  whose  past  world  counterparts  Tarantino  feels  were  never  dealt  suitable  justice.  If  the  heroes  seek  only  a  blood  payment  OWZ \QNRZ XNZ[WVJT []OONZRVP =JZJV\RVW QRU[NTO \ZJ^NTRVP KJLS RV \RUN J[ JV JTmost  metaphysical  presence)  demands  J [NNURVPTa RV VR\N KWMa LW]V\ OWZ \QN systems’  total  criminality.  ,a [WUN UNJ[]ZN[ =JZJV\RVWs[ calculation  is  not  unwarranted.  Most  of  the  highest-ranking  Nazis  took  their  own  lives  rather  than  surrender  \W \QN ãTTRN[ JVM UJVa URVWZ WO LRJT[ emerged  as  prominent  citizens  in  postwar  Germany.  After  the  conclusion  of  the  Civil  War  and  the  aborted  attempts  J\ ;JMRLJT ;NLWV[\Z]L\RWV UW[\ OWZUNZ slave  owners  were  able  to  reassert  their  positions  of  social  and  economic  dominance  over  Southern  blacks. If  the  cinematic  world  affords  the  TUUJSNZ \QN JKRTR\a \W KW\Q LZNJ\N JVM ZN NL\ ZNJTR\a _Qa VW\ \ZJ^NT \QZW]PQ time  and  re-settle  old  scores?  A  whole  [TN_ WO ZNLNV\ TU[ ?JTSaZRN # the  Counterfeiters  " .N JVLN # have  revisited  moments  when  resisters  fought  back  and  struck  blows  to  the  Third  Reich.  If  all  of  this  is  simply  sort  of  LJ\QJZ\RL N`NZLR[N RV ZN PQ\RVP MNJM KJ\\TN[ _Qa VW\ OWTTW_ =JZJV\RVW JVM LTJRU \QN VJT ^RL\WZa* 3V JVa UJ\NZRJT [NV[N \QN XJ[\ R[ MNJM aN\ QW_ _N continue  to  grapple  with  the  history  of  RVâ][\RLN QJ[ [RPVR LJV\ ZNXNZL][[RWV[ for  our  present  world.  What  then  can  we  make  of  Tarantino’s  intervention Â

RV \QN XJ[\ JVM _QJ\ JZN \QN LWV[Nquences? In  his  Faustian  bargain  with  his\WZa =JZJV\RVW J[S[ OWZ TN[[ \QJV \QJV Fry’s  protagonists  but  takes  far  more.  In  \QN NVM QN PN\[ VW\QRVP RV ZN\]ZV =JZJV\RVW MWN[Vs\ _JV\ \W NZJ[N [TJ^NZa RUXNZRJTR[U ZJLR[U WZ PNVWLRMN 2N WVTa _JV\[ J UWZN MRPVR NM JVM QWVWZJKTN NVM \W \QN VJT LQJX\NZ WO 8JbR[U JVM ãUNZRLJV [TJ^NZa JT\QW]PQ =JZJV\RVWs[ vision  of  honor  clouds  morality  and  irony  in  deeply  problematic  ways;  case  RV XWRV\ \QN []OOWLJ\RWV JVM RVLRVNZJtion  of  Nazis  by  Jews).  But  Tarantino  also  puts  up  no  LWTTJ\NZJT& RV QR[ _WZTM â][\RLN R[ XJRM in  full.  Both  ,J[\NZM[  and  .âJVPW  end  in  such  a  bizarre  and  near-cartoonish  _Ja \QN NV\RZN \JXN[\Za WO \QN TU R[ subsumed  in  a  torrent  of  mass  murder.  It’s  such  an  absurd  reckoning  that  when  \QN [UWSN VJTTa LTNJZ[ \QN J]MRNVLN R[ simply  reminded  of  how  little  has  been  ]VMWVN WZ LJV KN ]VMWVN ãO\NZ _J\LQRVP JVM ZN_J\LQing) 3VPTWZRW][ ,J[\NZM[  and  .âJVPW >VLQJRVNM 3s^N [NJZLQNM OWZ \QN â][\R LJ\RWV \QJ\ \QN JKW^N LWVLT][RWV R[ exactly  Tarantino’s  point.  I’ve  wanted  to  imagine  that  Tarantino  tempts  us  with  his  vision  of  easy  justice  but  ultimately  hopes  we  will  see  such  fruitless  visions  J[ UNZN RTT][RWV[ -W]TM QR[ TU[ KN holding  up  a  mirror  that  shows  us  that  our  cinematic  catharsis  is  nothing  more  \QJV \QN KJ[N[\ KTWWMT][\ ,J[\NZM[ NVM[ JO\NZ JTT RV J K]ZVRVP LRVNUJ * Although  Tarantino’s  2012  interview  with  the  African-American  history  scholar  Henry  Louis  Gates  for  theRoot.com  showed  Tarantino  has  studied  the  scholarship  on  American  slavery  in  preparation  for  .âJVPW and  has  a  rich  understanding  of  the  comXTN`R\RN[ WO \QN ãV\NKNTT]U <W]\Q QN also  professed  to  Gates  the  centrality  of  a  revenge  narrative  in  Django’s  alternate  reality.  =QR[ [NNU[ OZWU Ua ^JV\JPN XWRV\ J\ TNJ[\ \W ]T\RUJ\NTa []PPN[\ J TUUJSNZ _QW QWXN[ QR[ J]MRNVLN _RTT VM VJT â][\RLN RV XRL\]ZN[ WO K]ZVRVP KWMRN[ 8W URZZWZ[ â][\ [UWSN

world wide wes By  Jacob  Jaffe

o

V 8W^ \QN 3VMRJVJ Pacers  and  the  Detroit  Pistons  of  the  NBA  squared  off  in  a  mid-season  at  Detroit’s  [\JMR]U \QN :JTJLN J\ ĂŁ]burn  Hills.  The  Pacers  were  preseason  favorites  to  win  the  Eastern  Division  JVM ZNJLQ \QN VJT[& \QNRZ ZW[\NZ ONJtured  a  future  hall  of  famer  â€”  Reggie  Miller  â€”  and  talented  players  like  JerUJRVN 9s8NJT <\NXQNV 4JLS[WV ;WV ĂŁZ\N[\ <\NXQNV 4JLS[WV JVM 4JUJJT Tinsley.  The  Pistons  had  defeated  the  Pacers  in  the  previous  Eastern  Conference  Championship  and  had  a  strong  LWZN WO ,NV @JTTJLN ;J[QNNM @JTTJLN =Ja[QJ]V :ZRVLN ;RX 2JURT\WV JVM Chauncey  Billups. The  Pacers  dominated  from  the  KNPRVVRVP TNJMRVP Ka ! J\ \QN QJTO JVM 14  with  four  minutes  remaining.  The  game  descended  into  chippiness  and  cheap  fouls  from  there.  With  less  than  J URV]\N ZNUJRVRVP WVN WO \QN UW[\ infamous  sequences  in  the  history  of  professional  basketball  began. @JTTJLN X][QNM ĂŁZ\N[\ JVM XTJa-

ers  from  both  teams  started  shoving.  Artest  took  the  opportunity  to  lie  down  on  the  broadcast  table  with  a  carefree  and  bizarrely  nonchalant  attitude  and  pretended  to  call  the  game  with  radio  announcer  Mike  Boyle.  Artest’s  short  lived  career  in  radio  broadcasting  came  \W JV NVM JVM _QJ\ _W]TM LWUN \W KN known  as  â€œThe  Malice  at  the  Palaceâ€?  began  when  a  fan  threw  a  beer  at  Artest.  Artest  charged  like  an  enraged  bull  into  the  stands  and  connected  with  the  face  of  the  man  he  believed  to  be  the  erstwhile  suds  pitcher.  He  was  _ZWVP JVM \QN OZJLJ[ MN[LNVMNM OZWU \QN [NJ\[ X]VLQN[ \QZW_V JVM \QZW_V _RTMTa 3V \QN NVM WVN UJV _J[ JKTN \W QWTM KJLS \QR[ =J[UJVRJV .N^RT WO ZJPN% WVN [QRVa QNJMNM KJTM KTJLS [_NJ\ stained  suit-wearing  man. This  was  America’s  introduction  \W @WZTM @RMN @N[ \QW]PQ @N[ _J[ JT_Ja[ \QNZN RO aW] TWWSNM OWZ QRU [QJSing  hands  at  the  draft  table  of  a  number  WVN XRLS _QR[XNZRVP RV 6NKZWV 4JUN[s NJZ Q]PPRVP 4NZZa 4WVN[ JO\NZ J -W_KWa[ <]XNZ ,W_T _RV QRPQ ^RVP

7RJUR XTJaNZ[ JO\NZ J ,-< KW_T _RV embracing  Joe  Dumars  after  the  Pistons  _WV \QN 8,ĂŁ 0RVJT[ [R\\RVP KNQRVM 4WQV -JTRXJZR J\ \QN VJT OW]Z JVM âWRVing  Jay-Z  or  Nike  executive  Phil  Knight  at  the  All-Star  game.  2  Live  Crew  member  Luther  Campbell  became  enamored  early  in  Wes’  career. “My  claim  to  fame  is  that  I  took  @N[ WV QR[ Z[\ RPQ\ WV J âN\ @N _NV\ \W \QN 8,ĂŁ ĂŁTT <\JZ 1JUN _N _NV\ \W \QN >VR^NZ[R\a WO 7RJUR PJUN[ _N went  everywhere.  We  were  at  a  Mike  Ty[WV PQ\ RV ĂŁ\TJV\RL -R\a JVM @N[ \WWS me  back  into  the  casino  vault!  With  the  money!  You  only  get  to  go  back  there  if  you’re  an  employee  or  you’re  one  of  the  KWa[ 3 [JRM r9Q Ua 1WM @QW \QN QNTT JZN aW] @N[* @QJ\sM aW] MW*s ĂŁVM @N[ [JRM r3 â][\ SVW_ N^NZaKWMa s u @RTTRJU @N[TNa J S J 0ZN[Q @N[ J S J @WZTM @RMN @N[ _J[ KWZV ĂŁ]P $! RV -JUMNV 8N_ 4NZ[Na 2N XTJaNM QRPQ [LQWWT KJTT RV -QNZZa 2RTT[ _QNZN QN KNOZRNVMNM 7RT\ @JPVNZ _QW would  go  on  to  lead  Louisville  to  the  $#! 8-ĂŁĂŁ \R\TN =QR[ OZRNVM[QRX JTWVP

Culture _R\Q @N[s âWK J\ :ZW <QWN[ \QN XTJLN OWZ don’t  always  agree.  Money  rules.  It  is  NTR\N J\QTN\N[ \W PN\ L]\\RVP NMPN [QWN[ not  unheard  of  for  a  club  to  offer  kickhelped  Wes  build  relationships  with  backs  to  people  who  get  stars  through  many  elite  athletes.  Wes  could  get  them  the  doors.  As  a  20-year-old  in  the  shoes  and  advertise  upcoming  prodTNJP]N R\ R[ QJZM \W SVW_ _QW \W \Z][\ ]L\[ 2N PW\ QR[ Z[\ VRLSVJUN t0ZN[Q But  you  can  always  trust  â€œUncle  @N[ u KNLJ][N QN QJM \QN OZN[QN[\ WO @N[ u _R\Q QR[ [\WZRN[ WO 7RLQJNT 4WZMJV the  fresh  kicks.  Michael  Jordan  and  forRV -QRLJPW JVM QR[ LWV\JL\ TR[\ TTNM mer  Miami  coach  Jimmie  Johnson  were  with  basketball  royalty.  No  one  in  the  frequent  customers.  Michael  Jordan  NBA  has  a  horror  story  about  Wes.  PJ^N @N[ J âWK J\ QR[ LJUX _QRLQ X]\ You  can  trust  Wes;  he  doesn’t  play  Wes  in  touch  with  a  lot  of  the  powerful  those  games.  He  always  puts  the  athlete  people  who  would  later  show  up  on  his  Z[\ 3O aW] VNNM L][\WU LTW\QN[ LJTT rolodex  or  sitting  next  to  Wes  at  an  im@N[ 3O aW] VNNM J XTJLN â][\ LJTT @N[% portant  event. he  used  to  be  a  mortgage  broker.  Wes  Fresh  Wes  moved  more  early  Nike  LJV JT[W KN J t `NZu OWZ XTJaNZ[ RV JM[VNJSNZ[ \QJV QR[ XNNZ[ JVM 8RSN VWMR\RWV \W PN\\RVP /MMa -]ZZa RV [QJXN ticed  this.  He  was  granted  access  to  the  there  are  stories  involving  â€œUncle  Wesâ€?  QRPQN[\ TN^NT[ WO UJVJPNUNV\ J\ 8RSN getting  players  off  the  hook  for  seribut  it  is  unclear  as  to  whether  Wes  ous  gambling  debts.  Wes  also  helped  _WZS[ OWZ WZ QJ[ N^NZ WO LRJTTa _WZSNM t\JSN LJZN WOu ĂŁTTNV 3^NZ[WVs[ $$" JZZN[\ for  Nike.  The  connection  to  Nike  gives  OWZ UJZRâ]JVJ JVM ZNJZU XW[[N[[RWV him  access  to  Nikewhile  mediating  a  [XWV[WZNM N^NV\[ No  one  in  the  NBA  has  a  dispute  between  such  as  Lebron  Iverson  and  his  horror  story  about  Wes.  coach. James’  Skills  AcadYou  can  trust  Wes;  he  NUa _QNZN @WZTM Wes’  power  Wide  Wes  fosters  comes  from  the  doesn’t  play  those  games.  the  relationships  players’  trust.   Take  He  always  puts  the  athlete  6NKZWV 4JUN[ \QN that  make  him  so  powerful. Z[\ 3O aW] VNNM L][\WU biggest  active  NBA  There  are  superstar  on  the  rules  regarding  the  LTW\QN[ LJTT @N[ 3O aW] OJLN WO \QN NJZ\Q% recruitment  of  high  VNNM J XTJLN â][\ LJTT @N[ t2Ns[ J PZNJ\ school  players;  a  he  used  to  be  a  mortgage  P]a 3 UN\ QRU J LWJLQ WZ JVa UNUON_ aNJZ[ KJLS KNZ WO J LWTTNPN UJa broker.  2Ns[ KNNV J PZNJ\ not  exceed  certain  role  model  to  me.  TRUR\[ RV \QN [NJZLQ OWZ \QN VN`\ ^N [\JZ 3 LJV WVTa [Ja PWWM \QRVP[ JKW]\ QRU ZNLZ]R\ @N[ VW\ J UNUKNZ WO WZ LWVD F @QJ\s[ [JRM _QJ\ PWN[ WV _R\Q aW] \ZJL\NM \W JVa LWTTNPN LJV VN\_WZS JVM SVW_ W]Z OJURTa [\Ja[ _R\Q W]Z OJURTa lobby  to  his  heart’s  content.  ,]\ J[ OJZ J[ QRU KNRVP J PWWM XNZ[WV x Wes  frequently  sends  recruits  to  QNs[ JT_Ja[ KNNV PWWM \W UN 2Ns[ VN^NZ 5NV\]LSa LWJLQ 4WQV -JTRXJZR J UJV J[SNM UN OWZ JVa\QRVP 2Ns[ JT_Ja[ KNNV no  stranger  to  recruiting  violations  \Z][\_WZ\Qa \W UN JVM 3 ZN[XNL\ QRU OWZ -JTRXJZR QJ[ QJM \_W [NXJZJ\N 0RVJT that.â€? Four  appearances  invalidated  to  date).  @N[ Z[\ UN\ 4JUN[ J\ 4JUN[s QRPQ Wes  once  steered  a  player  Calipari’s  way  [LQWWT PJUN[ RV ĂŁSZWV @QRTN \QNZN only  when  Calipari  offered  a  scholarWes  befriended  James’  surrogate  father  ship  to  the  player’s  all-state  friend  with  and  introduced  James  to  Jay-Z.  James  poor  test  scores  and  hired  the  player’s  eventually  dumped  his  agent  in  favor  of  dad  as  director  of  basketball  operations.  JV JPNV\ QR[\WZRLJTTa LTW[N \W @N[ 6NWV @QNV \QN[N XTJaNZ[ TNJ^N LWTTNPN @N[ R[ Rose. \QNZN \W QNTX \QNU \QZW]PQ \QN MRO L]T\ Wes  frequently  funnels  playworld  of  NBA  stardom. NZ[ \W QR[ WTM OZRNVM OZWU 8N_ 4NZ[Na 3V \QN 8,ĂŁ LTRNV\[ JVM JPNV\[ Leon  Rose.  While  Rose  might  be  a Â

PWWM JPNV\ QN LNZ\JRVTa MWN[Vs\ QJ^N the  reach  to  land  Lebron  James  without  Wes’  help.  When  Hall’s  agency  was  KW]PQ\ Ka -ZNJ\R^N ĂŁZ\R[\[s ĂŁPNVLa \QN mega-agency  that  represents  such  stars  J[ -QZR[ ,W[Q JVM ._aJVN @JMN @N[ signed  on  as  an  agent  for  coaches.  That  didn’t  stop  Wes’  power  in  the  world  of  the  players.  Through  his  CAA  connections  and  his  personal  relationship  with  6NKZWV 4JUN[ @N[ UJa QJ^N QNTXNM \W orchestrate  the  2010  free  agency  period  \QJ\ KZW]PQ\ 4JUN[ ,W[Q JVM @JMN JTT to  the  Miami  Heat.   Wes  had  access  to  Team  USA  TR^RVP RV \NJU Y]JZ\NZ[ JVM J\tending  practices  that  were  off-limits  to  player’s  family.  This  treatment  had  agents  gnashing  their  teeth  out  of  frustration  and  jealousy.  Here  was  an  â€œadvisorâ€?  with  close  ties  to  agents  and  access  that  they  could  only  dream  about. Wes  is  a  master  of  impressing  potential  contacts.  When  wooing  Brazilian  XTJaNZ 6NJVMZW ,JZKW[J @N[ R[ [JRM \W have  called  Michael  Jordan  and  Jay-Z  in  quick  succession  after  hearing  they  were  Barbosa’s  favorite  player  and  mu[RLRJV ZN[XNL\R^NTa 2N [N\ ,JZKW[J ]X with  his  friend  Rose  and  organized  a  dinner  paid  for  by  the  former  president  of  the  Cleveland  Cavaliers. World  Wide  Wes’  rise  to  promiVNVLN RV \QN NTM WO XNZOWZUNZ[ JVM athletes  offers  a  telling  narrative  on  connections.  Wes  wasn’t  the  cleverest  XZWUW\NZ WZ \QN ZRLQN[\ K]\ QN _J[ \QN one  with  the  fullest  contact  book.  It  might  be  discomforting  to  accept  that  one  shadow  puppeteer  pulls  all  the  strings  from  the  NCAA  to  the  8,ĂŁ K]\ _N LJV [TNNX J TR\\TN NJ[RNZ J\ night  knowing  it’s  a  great  a  guy  as  Wes  is. 3V \QN NVM R\ _J[ OWZUNZ XTJaNZ Jalen  Rose  that  gave  â€œFresh  Wesâ€?  his  new  nickname  of  World  Wide  Wes.  The  story  goes  that  Jalen’s  plane  waited  nearly  an  hour  on  the  tarmac  so  that  Wes  wouldn’t  miss  his  very  important  RPQ\ =QNa WVTa QJM \W _JR\ JV QW]Z but  that  plane  would  still  be  on  the  \JZUJL RO @N[ _JV\NM R\ \W KN KNLJ][N World  Wide  Wes  knows  everybody. -81( ‡ /(2

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e r o c a w q a T e h t n i A S U k c o r k

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m a l s I of

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By Chris Connell

illustration by Nicholas Reed

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hink  Islam.  Think  punk  rock.  Would  it  not  be  common  to  picture  two  mutually  exclusive  circles?  Does  the  centuries  old  and  ever  evolving  Abrahamic  faith  of  peace  exist  entirely  outside  the  realm  of  the  last  few  decades’  revolution  of  sloppiness  and  aggression? Not  long  ago  I  happened  upon  \QN 5WURVJ[ J X]VS KJVM OZWU 6W_NTT 7ĂŁ =QNa XTJaNM JVPZa UJ[L]TRVN ZWLS U][RL ,NRVP \QN JVPZa UJTN 3 JU I  liked  it.  I  downloaded  their  album  and  proceeded  to  mosh  furiously  against  every  stick  of  furniture  in  my  home.  Then  I  started  to  pay  attention. =QNRZ QR\ [RVPTN OWZ TJLS WO J KN\\NZ XQZJ[N R[ LJTTNM <QJZRsJ 6J_ RV \QN > < ĂŁ J \QZNN URV]\N OWZ\a OW]Z second  banger  that  opens  with  traditional  maqam-based  XNZL][[RWV JVM ]\N ]V\RT a  solitary  guitar  screech  bleeds  into  the  track  and  erupts  into  a  sardonic  Dead  KenneMa[ N[Y]N KWWPRN rant  likening  the  P.A.T.R.I.O.T.  act  to  political  Islam’s  most  infamous  downside. This  is  taqwaLWZN \QN [aV\QN[R[ WO Islamic  God-consciousness  with  hardcore  punk’s  fuck-you-I’ll-do-it-myself  [_JPPNZ MNUJVMRVP ZNMN VRtion  and  revision  of  today’s  two  most  divisive  cultures.  Dare  to  fear  God  while  embracing  self. 3V 7RLQJNT 7]QJUUJM Knight  published  The  Taqwacores J VW^NT WO <] [ JVM <]VVR[ WO Z]MN KWa[ and  riot  grrrls  living  communally  in  ,]OOJTW 8N_ BWZS 3\[ WZRPRV J[ .3B J[ R\[ []KâNL\ \QN VW^NT KNPJV J[ J XQWtocopied  item  to  be  handed  around  RV UW[Y]N XJZSRVP TW\[ KNOWZN VJTTa VMRVP J XJZ\VNZ RV <WO\ <S]TT :ZN[[ =QN KWWS R\[NTO JV W\QNZ_R[N \aXRLJT outsider  novel  concerning  disaffected  youths  lost  without  a  solution  to  modNZV TR^RVP O]VL\RWV[ XZRUJZRTa J[ JV excuse  for  this  very  concept—a  muslim  punk.  So  began  the  movement. Take  Islam.  Let’s  be  reductive  and Â

LWV[RMNZ R\ J[ _QWTN QWUWPNVNW][ JVM UWVWTR\QRL J[ \QN _QWTN WO \QN @N[\NZV world  does.  According  to  some  Muslim  [LQWTJZ[ TR[\NVRVP \W U][RL XNZOWZUing  songs  and  purchasing  instruments  WO JU][NUNV\ JZN JTT MNNUNM QJZJJU _QRLQ R[ \W [Ja [RVO]T RV \QN ĂĄ]ZsJV and  the  Hadith  of  the  Prophet. This  particular  orthodox  strand  of  Islam  is  highly  structured.  People  JV[_NZ \W [QNRSQ[ JVM RUJU[ _QW RV \]ZV JV[_NZ \W 1WM 9VN PWN[ \W \QNU \W J[S _QJ\ R[ ZRPQ\ \W J[S _QJ\ R[ wrong.  They  are  authority.  They  are  the  gatekeepers  of  gnostic  truth. Enter  the  punks.  Topple  the  monolith.  A  typical  punk  looks  not  unto  others  to  decide  their  ethics  for  them.  A  punk  decides  for  QRU[NTO QNZ[NTO _QJ\ is  right  and  what Â

their  values.  Punk’s  earliest  practitioners  like  the  Sex  Pistols  and  the  New  York  Dolls  were  nihilists.  The  Second  generation  of  The  Clash  and  Minor  Threat  injected  humanism  into  the  decaying  arm  of  the  old  guard.  The  early  history  of  punk  rock  loosely  acts  as  a  transition  from  self-destruction  to  self-empowerment  to  community.  The  taqwacores’  community  is  one  of  God. Now  where  does  global  Muslim  culture  go  from  here?  It  is  seen  through  the  typical  semi-ignorant  culturally  Christian  eye  as  a  religion  frozen  in  time  that  abides  by  restrictions  the  type  WO _QRLQ QJ^N TWVP [RVLN JSNM J_Ja OZWU -QZR[\NVMWU _QNZN 6J\RV [XNJSRVP OJ[\RVP JVM \QN TRSN QJ^N TWVP [RVLN gone  by  the  wayside.  Here  is  something  VN_ _R\QRV [WUN\QRVP WTM J UWMN WO faith  for  the  liberalized  era.  What  was  once  a  monolith  now  lies  in  ruin  to  make  way  for  a  LR\a J UWZN _QWTTa MR^NZ[N community  of  people  set  apart  by  the  way  they  pray  but  tied  together  inseparably  by  the  same  God  to  whom  they  pray. May  I  recommend  shoving  it  in  the  face  of  the  naysayers?  Would  it  be  out  WO XTJLN OWZ UN JV J\QNR[\ OZWU \QN []K]ZK[ \W []Pgest  that  they  be  embraced  and  recognized  as  the  next  step  in  an  ever-evolving  culture?  2NZR\JPN R[ \JSNV JVM N`XJVMNM then  becomes  new  heritage  for  the  new  generation.  This  is  what  the  Kominas  have  done.  This  is  what  they  represent  for  the  future  of  Islam.  They  should  be  shown  off.  They  should  become  the  JP[QRX OWZ \QN KNJ]\a WO 3[TJU \WMJa a  signpost  of  what  it  has  become  over  its  14  centuries  as  a  counterpoint  to  the  corrupted  image  so  deeply  woven  into  the  modern  political  Islam  that  clings  insidiously  to  the  orthodoxy  at  its  worst. Something  has  changed.  This  is  a  VN_ NZJ OWZ 3[TJU WVN _QNZN XNZ[WVJTized  expression  of  God-consciousness  through  art  is  halaal  and  even  recogVRbNM J[ _QJ\ R\ R[ J _QWTTa ZNTRPRW][ act.

Heritage  is  taken  and  exXJVMNM \QNV KNLWUN[ new  heritage  for  the  new  generation.  This  is  what  the  Kominas  have  done.  This  is  what  they  represent  for  the  future  of  Islam. is  wrong.  The  skeleton  key  to  punk  culture  is  au\WVWUa 3O R\ LJV KN MWVN Ka WVN[NTO R\ should  be  done  by  oneself.  A  taqwacore  looks  at  an  imam  and  does  not  see  a  UJV LTW[NZ \W 1WM K]\ [RUXTa J UJV J[ close  to  God  as  he  allows  himself  to  be  and  yet  as  far  away  as  any  human  must  KN ĂŁ \JY_JLWZN XZJa[ K]\ XZJa[ KNcause  of  his  own  connection  to  his  faith. Picture  them.  Picture  mohawks  under  hijabs.  Picture  all  burqa  moshpits.  =QN [\ZJRPQ\ NMPN WJ\Q VM[ J [V]PPTa VRLQN J[ JV NTNUNV\ WO YQ 3[TJURL jurisprudence).  This  recontextualization  may  be  as  natural  as  it  is  jarring. And  why  not?  The  A.D.D.-addled  red-headed  stepchild  of  musical  modernism  has  always  been  about  making  strange  bedfellows  and  reappropriating Â

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Community produce  locally  with  government  subsidies.  As  wartime  technologies  found  their  way  into  civilian  TRON QW_N^NZ XZWLN[[NM OWWM[ and  kitchen  machinery  quickly  became  the  norm.  The  government  subsidies  once  used  to  support  struggling  farmers  were  going  straight  into  the  pockets  of  Big  Agro;  companies  like  Del  Monte  and  low-cost  meat  producers  like  Tyson  were  ZNJXRVP \QN XZW \[ ĂŁ [LQWWT lunch  program  that  once  used  to  nurse  malnourished  kids  quickly  devolved  into  a  bidding  race  with  food  companies  trying  to  beat  one  another  out  for  the  lowest  possible  production  cost.  3VN^R\JKTa J[ \QN LW[\ WO OWWM production  and  distribution  ONTT [W MRM OWWM Y]JTR\a /V\NZ slabs  of  Salisbury  steak  and  mysterious  creamed  corn.  Fast  forward  to  _QNV \QN 8N_\WV School  Committee  was  faced  with  a  $1  million  dollar  bill  from  the  NPS  cafeteria  system.  -WTTNL\R^NTa \QN Newton  schools  were  losing  $1  million  each  year  on  student  UNJT[ OWZLRVP \QN city  to  make  a  QJZM MNLR[RWV% TJa off  13  teachers  or  VM J _Ja \W L]\ million  out  of  the  lunch  system.  One  look  at  the  cafeteria’s  infamous  â€œFrait  Expressâ€?—  a  hulking  ten-foot  refrigeration  chamber  full  of  wilting  salads  and  soapy  parfaits  â€”  should  tell  you  which  way  the  School Â

Committee  voted.  After  realizing  that  its  inability  to  cut  costs  through  N\QRLJT JVM TWPRLJT UNJV[ \QN School  Committee  opted  to  outsource  the  entire  problem  \W @QR\[WV[ -]TRVJZa 1ZW]X which  promised  to  make  the  bill  vanish  in  a  puff  of  hot-lamp  [\NJU >VOWZ\]VJ\NTa \QN <LQWWT Committee  failed  to  consider  the  repercussions  of  cutting  $1  million  in  costs  overnight.  The  results  were  predictably  disastrous.

graphics by Yoonchan Choi

3V TR[\RVP JTT WO \QN ZNM JP[ that  should  have  prevented  the  Newton  Public  Schools  from  contracting  its  food  service  out  \W @QR\[WV[ -]TRVJZa 1ZW]X R\s[ hard  to  know  where  to  start.  The  train  wreck  that  is  Whitsons  starts  with  a  tax  N^J[RWV TJ_[]R\ XRLS[ ]X [XNNM in  the  New  England  prison  for  _QRLQ R\ []XXTRN[ OWWM ZW]VM[ a  bend  at  the  unconscionable  K][RVN[[ WO XZW \RVP WOO XWWZ nutrition  and  comes  to  a  stop  at  the  thousands  of  dollars  of  KNVN \[ JVM [JTJZRN[ L]\ OZWU LJON\NZRJ _WZSNZ[ [WUN WO _QWU have  been  loyal  to  the  Newton  school  system  for  over  thirty  years).  But  an  understanding  of  Whitsons  probably  begins  with  an  understanding  of  the  8J\RWVJT <LQWWT 6]VLQ :ZWPZJU a  program  Whitson’s  now  N`XTWR\[ \W []LS ]X XZW \[ TRSN J four-foot  tapeworm  hiding  in  a  box  of  USDA-approved  freezedried  chicken  nuggets. 3V $ ! :ZN[RMNV\ 2JZZa Truman  established  the  National  <LQWWT 6]VLQ :ZWPZJU 8<6: to  bolster  postwar  food  prices  and  nourish  the  underfed  youth  WO ĂŁUNZRLJ KJLS RV\W PQ\RVP condition  for  round  two  in  Korea.  The  United  States  Department  of  Agriculture  ><.ĂŁ [J_ \QN 8<6: J[ J MW]KTN _QJUUa% =QN government  could  prop  up  the  struggling  agricultural  industry  by  buying  surplus  foods  while  simultaneously  providing  healthful  lunches  to  a  generation  literally  too  weak  to  PQ\ 0WZ aNJZ[ JO\NZ \QN KRTTs[ XJ[[JPN T]VLQ TJMRN[ LWWSNM ]X fresh  meals  by  sourcing  their Â

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Community  Here’s  a  short  enumeration  of  the  [JLZR LN[ W]Z [LQWWT community  made  for  Whitsons’  low-cost  [WT]\RWV% @QR\[WV[ cut  a  third  of  the  LJON\NZRJ _WZSNZ[s XJa failing  to  acknowledge  the  important  contributions  of  each  cafeteria  employee.  Whitsons  swapped  a  decent  health  care  KNVN \ XTJV OWZ WVN WO TW_NZ Y]JTR\a NV[]ZRVP that  workers  will  have  to  spend  more  of  their  own  hard-earned  pay  on  medical  expenses.   The  most  egregious  point  about  Newton  Public  Schools’  contract  with  Whitsons  R[ JT[W \QN UW[\ KJ[RL% >VMNZ @QR\[WV[ \QN meals  we  eat  are  less  QNJT\Qa [NZ^RVP ]X UWZN OJ\ UWZN LJTWZRN[ and  more  processed  ingredients.  And  that’s  without  taking  into  account  the  â€œsnacksâ€?  â€”  sugar-coated  LRVVJK]V[ [T][QRN[ JVM fruit  snacks  that  often  make  up  the  better  part  of  students  meals.  Although  nobody  likes  to  see  food  quality  go  down  \QN MZJRV OWZ UJVa [\]MNV\[ \QNZNs[ J simple  alternative  to  @QR\[WV[% KZRVPRVP J bag  lunch.  But  what  happens  if  school  lunch  is  the  only  option?  Herein  lies  what  is  for  me  the  biggest  problem Â

with  outsourcing  to  Whitsons.  Despite  the  risible  and  inappropriate  Virginia  Wolff  quotation  posted  WV R\[ _NK[R\N t9VN LJVVW\ \QRVS _NTT TW^N _NTT [TNNX _NTT if  one  has  not  dined  _NTTu @QR\[WV[ OJRT[ \W provide  nutritious  food  to  the  kids  who  need  it  most.  For  students  who  rely  on  the  free  or  reduced-price  meals  written  into  the  8<6: \QNZN N`R[\[ no  choice  between  turkey  on  whole  wheat  from  home  or  a  pile  of  nachos  warming  on  a  hot  plate.  Ask  any  student  and  he  will  tell  you  that  the  situation  is  even  worse  than  three  years  JPW _QNV LJON\NZRJ staff  members  were  actually  allowed  to  cook  fresh  ingredients  into  meals  not  dictated  Ka J @QR\[WV[ UJV]JT albeit  rarely.  If  that’s  not  []O LRNV\Ta LWV^RVLRVP let’s  take  a  look  at  the  numbers.  The  U.S.  Food  and  Drug  Administration  budgets  around  $10  billion  dollars  for  the  NSLP.  Divide  that  by  the  number  of  kids  RV PZJMN[ 5 JVM that’s  around  $3.50  per  kid  per  day.  That’s  not  much  money  to  begin  with  but  Whitsons  ensures  that  more  than  half  of  that  $3.50  goes  toward  payroll  and Â

overhead.  At  the  end  WO \QN MJa WVTa R[ being  spent  on  a  kid’s  actual  lunch.  While  this  statistic  R[ [\JPPNZRVP \QNZNs[ more.  Given  all  the  free  and  reduced-cost  meals  a  school  system  must  XZW^RMN \QN PW^NZVUNV\ supports  the  system  through  what’s  called  â€œcommodity  food.â€?  3V TJaUJVs[ \NZU[ that  means  that  the  government  supplies  food  instead  of  giving  the  cash  to  school  districts  and  letting  them  buy  the  food  for  themselves. So  now  Whitsons  is  taking  food  the  government  XZW^RMN[ [XNLR LJTTa for  low-income  kids  who  might  not  be  getting  the  best  food  J\ QWUN XZWLN[[RVP R\

and  shipping  it  straight  to  the  Frait  Express.   To  better  understand  Newton’s  \ZJV[R\RWV \W @QR\[WV[ I  attempted  to  interview  several  cafeteria  workers  from  the  old  regime Â

but  was  met  with  silence  from  practically  everyone  I  contacted.  From  the  few  hushed  exchanges  I  was  able  \W LWJ` W]\ \_W \QRVP[ became  clear.  0RZ[\ [XNJSRVP W]\ against  Whitsons  in  any  way  leads  to  severe  and  sometimes  offensive  MR[LRXTRVJZa JL\RWV ranging  from  verbal  reprimand  to  dismissal  from  the  company.  <NLWVM UJVJPNZ[ completely  control  LJON\NZRJ _WZSNZ[ barring  employees  from  cooking  anything  VW\ [QRXXNM XZNXJZNM or  directly  approved  by  Whitsons  Culinary  Group.  <QWLSRVPTa Whitson’s  website  and  varied  public  relations  campaigns  fail  to  convey  the  sentiment  of  dissatisfaction  and Â

distrust  shared  by  students  and  workers  alike.  Take  for  example  the  Whitsons  Family  0W]VMJ\RWV J LQJZR\a project  started  by  Whitsons  to  â€œhelp  team  members  in  need.â€?  Whitsons  donated  \W XZW^RMN grants  to  workers  [\Z]PPTRVP VJVLRJTTa But  here’s  the  LJ\LQ% =QN ZN[\ WO \QN foundation’s  money  is  expected  to  come  in  the  form  of  donations  from  Whitsons  workers  \QNU[NT^N[ =QJ\ R[ workers  paid  just  above  minimum  wage.  =QJ\ R[ @QR\[WVs[ R[ literally  asking  its  own  employees  to  stretch  their  meager  earnings  even  further  to  support  co-workers  even  worse  off  than  themselves.  8RLN WVN @QR\[WV[

 While  reading  about  the  Whitsons  Family  Foundation  on  \QN LWUXJVas[ _NK[R\N I  cam  upon  vague  descriptions  of  healthy  meal  options  broken  up  by  pictures  of  multiethnic  tweens  littering  the  site’s  politically  correct  interface.  I  also  noticed  that  prison  meals  make  no  appearance  anywhere  on  the  site  despite  Whitsons’  contracted  service  within  the  Connecticut  State  Penitentiary.  What’s  so  strange  is  that  administrators  and  Newton  School  Committee  members  still  claim  to  have  made  the  right  decision  in  choosing  Whitsons.  9^NZ JVM W^NZ JPJRV 3 was  told  that  the  school  budget  is  intended  OWZ SRM[s NM]LJ\RWV

_QJ\N^NZ [JLZR LN[ might  be  necessary.   It  seems  to  me  \QJ\ JTT WO ][ OZWU \QN superintendent  on  down  to  the  freshman  in  line  for  a  slice  of  XRbbJ VNNM \W \JSN another  look  at  the  price  we’re  paying.  That  price  is  a  student  body  feeling  tired  and  lethargic  from  OJ\\a OWWM[ \QN _WZ[\ effect  being  on  those  students  most  in  need  of  a  source  of  good  nutrition.  That  price  is  layoffs  and  pay  cuts  affecting  members  of  our  community  trying  to  pay  off  college  loans  so  their  children  won’t  have  to  be  subjected  to  the  same  abuse  they  JZN ,]\ JKW^N JTT \QN price  is  the  message  that  we  are  okay  with  a  company  that  mistreats  its  workers  and  its  consumers.  We  are  okay  with  a  company  faced  with  million-  dollar  lawsuit  for  embezzling  XZW \[ OZWU [LQWWT districts.  And  we  are  okay  with  a  company  that  represents  the  antithesis  of  the  basic  moral  principles  we’ve  been  taught  our  whole  lives  by  educators  in  Newton’s  classrooms.  It  seems  as  though  the  Frait  Express  is  wrecked  but  still  isn’t  losing  any  steam. -81( ‡ /(2

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BREAKING: UNINFORMED C SHADOW GOVERNMENT OF # FOOLISH BABBLING BELOW By Rose Taylor

L

J[\ OJTT \QN 8N_ BWZS =RUN[ published an op-ed called t2W_ \W 6R^N @R\QW]\ 3ZWVa u J wide-ranging attack on hipsterdom and insincerity. The piece quickly KNLJUN XWX]TJZ XZRUJZRTa JUWVP people who pretend not to participate in hipsterdom and insincerity. Author Christy Wampole claims that irony strips our lives of meanRVP \QJ\ ZNXTJLRVP KNTRNO _R\Q [JZLJ[U JVM [NTO ZNONZNVLN R[ LW_JZMTa \QJ\ “directness has become unbearable to ][uxNOONL\R^NTa \QJ\ RZWVa ]VMNZTRN[ the West’s current spirit of decline and emptiness. =QR[ tRZWVau R[ VW\ MZJUJ\RL RZWVa [R\]J\RWVJT RZWVa WZ [JZLJ[U =QW[N MNscribe when Juliet proclaims her excitement for a long life with Romeo; when a speeding ambulance crushes a pedestrian; and when someone with taste buds calls cafeteria food “delicious.” Wampole’s “irony” is the opposite WO t[RVLNZR\a u tNJZVN[\VN[[ u WZ tZNJTVN[[ ux\QJ\ RVNOOJKTN KZJVM WO UNJVingless pretension and unbearable selfawareness that motivates sane people to consciously wear ugly sweaters.) Wampole’s critics have two main XWRV\[% Z[\ \QJ\ _N QJ^N UWZN RUXWZ\JV\ XZWKTNU[ \W [WT^N \QJV RZWVa JVM [NLWVM \QJ\ \QN ]T\ZJ RZWVRL QRX[\NZ @JUXWTN ONJZ[ MWN[Vs\ N`R[\ WZ J\ least hasn’t achieved the ubiquity she MN[LZRKN[ ãO\NZ JTT RO \QN MN^NTWXNM world—and this is a problem exclusively of the developed world—is over W_RVP _R\Q XNWXTN _QW MZRVS :JK[\ Blue Ribbon and grow ridiculous facial QJRZ _QWs[ PR^RVP @JUXWTNs[ JZ\RLTN R\[ overwhelming response?

These arguments are largely valid. 3V â][\ \QN >VR\NM <\J\N[ R[[]N[ TRSN P]V LWV\ZWT LTRUJ\N LQJVPN JVM JKWZ\RWV rights far supersede irony in scope and consequence. And at Newton South speLR LJTTa QRX[\NZ JK]VMJVLN R[ RVMNNM TW_NZ \QJV @JUXWTN RUXTRN[% \QN V]UKNZ of people who “liked that band before it was cool” is dwarfed by the number who make fun of people who say “I liked that band before it was cool.” @N QJ^N 3V[\JPZJU T\NZNZ[ JVM RZWVRL [_NJ\NZ _NJZNZ[ K]\ \QJ\ PZW]X seems bigger than it is because it makes such a large fraction of South’s Internet noise. Irony at South is not exclusively N^RT NR\QNZ =QN [JZLJ[U JVM RV\NTTRPNV\ ironic criticism that members of our school engage in is often witty and fun. 3V WVN RUXWZ\JV\ _Ja \QW]PQ W]Z brand of deliberate irony is as toxic as @JUXWTN JTTNPN[% _Ns^N LZNJ\NM J [LQWWT in which it’s impossible to love earnestly. Unrestrained enthusiasm is more likely to provoke snickering than support at South. Those self-conscious enough to see inelegance or immaturity in their classmates’ activities look down on those not similarly blessed. We mock those who express themselves by wearing tails; we mock those who painstakingly organize freshman fundraiser dances; we mock those who strive to inject meaning into school govNZVUNV\ <WUN\RUN[ _QNV QN \ZRN[ \WW QJZM _N N^NV UWLS W]Z XZRVLRXJT We mock these people neither relentlessly nor constantly—some factions of Newton South respect them. But the fact remains that the students who enjoy \QN UW[\ RV ]NV\RJT NJ[a [NNURVP [WLRJT success here treat enthusiasm as though

R\s[ Q]URTRJ\RVP ã\ <W]\Q [\]MNV\[ _QW thrive don’t care. ãL\]JTTa \QJ\s[ VW\ Y]R\N JLL]ZJ\N @R\Q [WUN N`LNX\RWV[ \QN [\]dents who thrive look like they don’t care. They care just enough to take AP classes and found clubs and participate in publications. But they don’t care enough to love earnestly. Take the Bake Sale Club. Its ba[RL XZNUR[N R[ [J\RZRLJT% R\ UWLS[ W\QNZ clubs’ overly frequent attempts at fundraising. But Bake Sale Club doesn’t stoop to throwing bake sales itself. 3V[\NJM R\ WZPJVRbN[ N^NV\[ TRSN 7JZLQs[ @J\NZ -JOÆ _QRLQ ONJ\]ZNM [URZSRVP LT]K UNUKNZ[ [NZ^RVP OZNN NTJKWZJ\NTa described water blends to lounging students over a deliberately pretentious soundscape of elevator-music jazz. The Club even provided printed menus in restaurant-style sleeves. On the heels of the Café’s opening lunch block came a Yelp entry for \QN N[\JKTR[QUNV\ =QN XJPN JV RTTWPRLJT method of promotion for a “business” that sells nothing and exists only at odd hours within an isolated school buildRVP RVLT]MN[ ZN^RN_[ [W QJLSVNaNM JVM thesaurus-reliant that Yelp’s rudimentary review trustworthiness software can tell that they were written by the Water Café’s operators. Though Bake Sale Club’s Facebook XZW TN LTJRU[ \W XZWUW\N tJOOWZMJKTN JVM QRPQ Y]JTR\a KJSN [JTN[ u R\[ XJ[\Za OZNN \QNJ\ZRL[ UJSN R\ MRO L]T\ \W KNTRN^N the club stands for anything at all. Even its logo—a cupcake frosted with the words “Join or Die” in front of a bald eagle holding a streamer that reads “in baked goods we trust”—winks snidely

D CIRCUS CLOWN CRITICIZES F #NEWTONSOUTH. READ HER — SILENT MAJORITY J\ \QN LT]Ks[ J]MRNVLN MJZRVP WVTWWSNZ[ to be so stupid as to take it seriously. That same attitude runs through \QN -T]Ks[ W\QNZ 3V\NZVN\ ^NV\]ZN[ []LQ J[ 8<2< 6NWs[ ;WJZ J =_R\\NZ JVM 0JLNbook publication that posts humorous news updates mostly concerning snow. Although Leo’s Roar and Bake Sale -T]K JZN \NLQVRLJTTa ]VJO TRJ\NM ,JSN Sale Club includes additional members that have no hand in Leo’s Roar’s tweets JVM XW[\[ \QN XZRVLRXJT ]XXNZLTJ[[men involved in both ventures are the same. Named as an amalgam of NSHS .NVNKWTJ 6NW JVM =QN 6RWVs[ ;WJZ K]\ TJLSRVP J X]KTRLJ\RWV LaLTN JV WO LRJT [\JOO TR[\ WZ J [RVPTN W\QNZ QJTTUJZS WO TNPR\RUJ\N âW]ZVJTR[U 8<2< 6NWs[ ;WJZ satirizes the haphazard desperation OWZ 3V\NZVN\ \ZJO L N`QRKR\NM Ka \WMJas[ extinction-wary news outlets. At the [JUN \RUN R\[ VWR[a WK[N[[R^NTa L]ZZNV\ postings plead for an almost identical type of online relevance. The publication also incorporates J X[N]MW XWTR\RLJT NTNUNV\% _R\Q R\[ deafening uppercase letters and chamXRWVRVP WO J ^JP]N t[RTNV\ UJâWZR\a u Leo’s Roar sounds like a primitive Occupy Wall Street parody presented with all the elegance and subtlety of Glenn Beck. ã[ _R\Q \QN @J\NZ -JOÆ R\s[ RUXW[sible to know what Leo’s Roar actually believes. Its through-line of rebellion JVM XZW\N[\ â]UX[ WOO \QN [LZNNV K]\ the exaggerated drama with which the publication constructs its posts throws sincerity out the window. The absurdity in its writing is too abundant to be accidental; there’s no way Leo’s Roar means

just what it says. @QJ\s[ UWZN XWTR\RLJT ]XZR[RVP[ aren’t all that the publication deals with. Before its recent focus on snow days JVM \QN @J\NZ -JOÆ 6NWs[ ;WJZs[ =_R\ter feed occasionally called attention to the spelling mistakes of fellow tweeters. Those tweets had nothing to do with rising up or being heard; all they did was sneer. 0ZWU JTT \QN[N JL\R^R\RN[ KW\Q WVTRVN JVM RV \QN ZNJT _WZTM WVN LWVLT][RWV NUNZPN[% \QN ,JSN <JTN -T]K 7NUbers put mocking higher up on their priority list than anything else. Their ostentatious lack of concern dresses LZ]NT\a ]X J[ QRXVN[[ LWV\NUX\ J[ playful derision. ã[ J ZN[]T\ [WUN VM \QN -T]K endlessly amusing. The layering of humor under ostensibly larger ideals makes Leo’s Roar readers and Bake Sale Club “customers” feel like they’re in on the joke. Upperclassmen friendly with Club members order the Water Café’s signature beverages with gusto and frequently share Leo’s Roar’s manifestolike Facebook updates. 0WZ W\QNZ [\]MNV\[ \QN[N WZPJVRzations are irritating. Their reasons are ^JZRNM% [WUN JZN RZSNM Ka \QN XWRV\TN[[ness of the club’s activities; others can’t tolerate its desperation for attention WZ R\[ XZR^RTNPNM 8N_\WVRJV QJKR\ WO spending money and time without a constructive goal. Still others can’t quite articulate what’s wrong with the Bake <JTN -T]K RV[\NJM XWRV\RVP \W J ^JP]N WKVW`RW][VN[[ [WUN\QRVP \QJ\ â][\ rubs them the wrong way. =QJ\ MR[TRSN UJSN[ [NV[N% \QN ^J[\ gap between what the club says and

_QJ\ RO JVa\QRVP R\ JL\]JTTa UNJV[ R[ MNLNX\R^N @QNV R\[ \JZPN\[ JZN [XNLR L NVW]PQ \QJ\ PJX R[ JTUW[\ LZ]NT ã[ @JUXWTN JZP]N[ RV[RVLNZR\a R[ VW\ J TRSJKTN Y]JTR\a VW UJ\\NZ QW_ QJZM it tries to bury itself in humor. Ironic teasing somehow comes off cowardly and mean at the same time. From the W]\[RMN ,JSN <JTN -T]Ks[ JV\RL[ [LZNJU RV[RVLNZN MNZR[R^N JVM MNNXTa Z]MN Few students recognize the deeper confusion beneath Bake Sale Club’s RZZN^NZNV\ OJT[NVN[[ =QN @J\NZ -JOÆ while on the surface attention-seeking JVM WKVW`RW][ KZW]PQ\ \QN [LQWWT \Wgether to peacefully protest the administration’s ban on eating in the lobby. Leo’s Roar’s facetious Occupy-WallStreet-style rhetoric masks a genuine commitment to quickly informing stuMNV\[ WO [LQWWT LTW[RVP[ 9LLJ[RWVJTTa the Twitter feed posts a relevant piece of school news that’s incorrect else_QNZN TRSN \QN \Z]N LJ][N WO .NLNUKNZs[ RUXZWUX\] ZN MZRTT QNJ\RVP UJTO]VL\RWV VW\ LQNUR[\Za N`XNZRUNV\ >VMNZ LW^NZ WO RZWVa JVM XNZQJX[ ]VLWV[LRW][Ta \QN ,JSN <JTN -T]K UNUKNZ[ _WZS \W [XZNJM RVOWZUJ\RWV RUXZW^N \QN [LQWWT JVM K]RTM LWUU]VR\a 8W UJ\\NZ QW_ QJZM \QNa \Za they cannot conceal the basic sincerity within their work. =QN OJL\ \QJ\ \QNa QJ^N \W \Za though—their need to hide under winks and sneers and smirks for fear of ZN^NJTRVP \QJ\ UJaKN â][\ UJaKN \QNa love their school and want to show it somehow before they leave—that may be the saddest irony of all.

-81( /(2

23

F

illustration by Jackie Chen

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he  icy  winter  wind  pummeled  my  bare  face  as  I  made  my  way  across  the  lawn  and  up  the  many  stairs  of  City  Hall.  The  vigil  was  something  I  would  never  miss.  Yet  there  was  a  part  of  me  that  simply  didn’t  want  to  have  to  bother  at  the  time.  So  much  had  been  [JRM JVM MWVN JKW]\ \QN 8N_\W_V -= [QWW\RVP \QJ\ QJM X]\ UN RV J [WUKNZ uncomfortable  mood.   It  took  effort  to  snap  out  of  the  UWWM WVLN 3 _J[ RV R\ \W [QJSN R\ WOO and  keep  going.  How  could  I  smile  and  laugh  with  my  friends  about  petty  \QRVP[ â][\ URV]\N[ JO\NZ VR[QRVP a  moment  of  silence  or  having  a  â€œconstructiveâ€?  conversation?  It  didn’t  settle  right  inside. 4][\ J TR\\TN _QRTN 3 \QW]PQ\ \W Ua[NTO 1N\ [JM OWZ â][\ JV QW]Z WZ [W pay  your  respects  and  then  continue  on  with  your  evening.  No  big  deal.

I  entered  through  the  large  doors  WO \QN _JZ UNUWZRJT XJ[[RVP Ka policemen  in  uniform.  The  auditorium  _J[ TTNM _R\Q OWTMRVP LQJRZ[ RV VNJ\ ZW_[ [WUN WO _QRLQ _NZN WLL]XRNM but  not  many.  I  met  with  the  chorus  for  a  sound  check;  we  would  be  singing  â€œWe  Shall  Overcomeâ€?  for  the  crowd.  A  light  blue  screen  at  the  front  of  the  room  displayed  a  list  of  names  of  victims  and  their  ages. ĂŁVJ 7 7JZY]Nb 1ZNNVN JPN ! ?RL\WZRJ <W\W JPN " 8WJQ :WbVNZ JPN ! The  list  kept  replaying  and  playing  in  a  loop.

A

O\NZ J \RUN 3 KNPJV \W ZN NL\ ]XWV the  massive  numbers  of  tragic  events  covered  by  national  media  that  have  taken  place  in  the  last  decade. Â

=QN Z[\ []LQ N^NV\ 3 ZNUNUKNZ _J[ <NX\NUKNZ ĂŁ SRVMNZPJZ\NV [\]MNV\ 3 ]VMNZ[\WWM \QJ\ [WUN XNWXTN QJM W_V XTJVN[ RV\W \QN =_RV =W_NZ[ and  that  many  people  had  died.  But  I  didn’t  understand  much  else.  3V \QN [XZRVP WO " PZJM]J\N to-be  Seung-hui  Cho  shot  32  people  to  death  on  the  campus  of  Virginia  Tech  prior  to  shooting  himself.  Four  years  TJ\NZ ĂŁZRbWVJ ;NXZN[NV\J\R^N 1JKZRNTTN Giffords  was  shot  in  the  head  along  _R\Q UJVa []XXWZ\NZ[ RVLT]MRVP a  nine-year-old  girl.  James  Holmes  entered  a  movie  theater  and  attacked  viewers  at  a  midnight  showing  of  The  .JZS 5VRPQ\ ;R[N[  in  July.  He  murdered  12  people  and  injured  nearly  60.  Not  N^NV \QZNN _NNS[ TJ\NZ J @R[LWV[RVR\N [QW\ MW_V JVW\QNZ [R` XNWXTN \QR[ \RUN in  a  Sikh  temple. Each  disaster  always  led  to  a  general  sense  of  uneasiness.  Then  came Â

Finding Common Ground The importance of personalizing tragedy By Courtney Foster

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\QN 8N_\W_V -= [QWW\RVP J\ <JVMa 2WWS /TNUNV\JZa <LQWWT ZN[]T\RVP RV \QN MNJ\Q WO ! RVMR^RM]JT[ WO _QWU _NZN Z[\ PZJMN [\]MNV\[ <]MMNVTa public  outcry  rose  to  a  deafening  roar.  Professionals  across  the  continent  put  their  heads  together  as  they  grappled  _R\Q \QN XRNLN[ WO \QN X]bbTN QWXRVP to  assemble  a  map  of  the  problem  that  we  could  interpret.  Grief  councils  were  held.  An  abundance  of  writing  amassed. BN\ RV 8N_\WV 7ĂŁ M]KKNM a  sister  to  Newtown  for  the  cities’  similar  suburban  qualities  and  nearQWUWVaURL VJUN[ TRON _NV\ WV without  much  ado.  3V QWUNZWWU _N [J\ [RTNV\ OWZ one  minute  in  remembrance  of  the  tragedy  before  picking  up  our  bags  and  UW^RVP WV \W \QN VN`\ LTJ[[ \QN [JUN WTM LQJ\\NZ TTRVP \QN QJTT_Ja[ â][\ moments  after  we’d  pondered  death. Â

School  administrators  sent  NUJRT[ \W \QN <W]\Q LWUU]VR\a JLSVW_TNMPRVP _QJ\ QJM QJXXNVNM initiating  discussions  in  classrooms  and  inviting  students  to  consult  guidance  LW]V[NTWZ[ RO \QNa _R[QNM .R[L][[RWV[ RO \QNa QJXXNVNM J\ JTT _NZN KZRNO We  knew  not  to  take  this  matter  TRPQ\Ta @N _NZN J_JZN WO \QN OJL\[ W]Z VJ\RWVs[ NUW\RWVJT K]ZMNV W]Z VJ\RWVs[ losses.  Our  physical  and  psychological  [NXJZJ\RWV OZWU 8N_\W_V QW_N^NZ intrinsically  distanced  us  from  the  events  there. As  high  school  students  [\Z]PPTRVP \W VM W]Z _Ja[ W]Z lives  aren’t  easy.  Our  high-caliber  schooling  causes  stress  as  an  inevitable  side  effect.  Many  of  us  face  serious  challenges  at  home  and  within  our  families.  But  none  deny  that  kids  in  Newton  lead  sheltered  lives.  In  the  midst  of  an  America  facing  economic  MW_V\]ZV [WLRJT LWV RL\[ JVM _JZ Newton  remains  a  known  anomaly.  A  stereotypical  Newton  teen  lives  in Â

a  recently  refurnished  house  with  a  J\[LZNNV =? JVM VR[QNM KJ[NUNV\ drives  a  new  car  to  pick  up  Starbucks  every  morning  on  the  way  to  school  and  writes  lengthy  papers  for  AP  classes  late  at  night  on  a  Macbook  Pro.  Our  lives  consist  of  a  neat  array  of  [LQWWT OZRNVM[ JVM N`\ZJL]ZZRL]TJZ[ @N exist  in  relative  comfort  while  we  listen  to  angsty  music  and  blog  about  our  N`R[\NV\RJT LZR[N[ TW[N [TNNX W^NZ MZJUJ we  create  for  ourselves.  Crises  include  losing  an  iPhone  or  getting  a  bad  grade  on  a  test.  We  joke  about  Newton’s  standing  as  one  of  the  safest  cities  in  \QN VJ\RWV \QRVS VW\QRVP WO _JTSRVP Newton  Center’s  streets  alone  at  night  or  talking  to  strangers.  Relatively  [XNJSRVP \QN TR^N[ _N TNJM RV 8N_\WV are  tame.  We  put  emphasis  on  educating  ourselves  about  the  world  around  us  and  staying  on  top  of  current  events;  if  we  can’t  discuss  these  things  with  W\QNZ[ _N LJVs\ ZNJTTa O]VL\RWV RV the  Newton  environment.  We  study  XWTR\RL[ ZNTRPRWV TR\NZJ\]ZN [LRNVLN and  culture  to  better  our  knowledge  of  society  and  of  our  universe.  -81( ‡ /(2

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Reflections But  through  education  JTWVN MW _N ZNJTTa JLY]RZN J true  understanding  of  these  world  affairs?  Even  when  we  utilize  all  the  tangible  resources  at  our  disposal--  \N`\KWWS[ VN_[XJXNZ \NTN^R[RWV WVTRVN UNMRJ platforms--  our  bookish  efforts  to  understand  are  of  limited  avail.  The  technology  we  learn  from  moves  fast  enough  to  tell  us  about  faraway  global  affairs  at Â

\QN MZWX WO J QJ\ K]\ LJVs\ provide  true  emotional  connection.  There’s  no  substitute  for  living  these  stories.  We  can  learn  about  a  plane  decimating  the  Twin  Towers  and  killing  \QW][JVM[ WZ JKW]\ genocide  in  a  Connecticut  NTNUNV\JZa [LQWWT K]\ VW\ until  such  tragedies  occur  right  at  our  doors  can  we  fully  internalize  these  tribulations. =QR[ :J\ZRW\[ .Ja

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such  a  tragedy  struck.  At  \QN VR[Q TRVN WO \QN ,W[\WV 7JZJ\QWV \_W KWUK[ N`XTWMNM RVâ]ZRVP VNJZTa JVM SRTTRVP J\ TNJ[\ \QZNN including  an  eight-yearold  boy  who  had  come  to  watch  the  festivities.  It  was  unexpected  to  say  the  least.  Many  students  _NZN VW\ N^NV QWUN J_Ja ^R[R\RVP LWTTNPN[ WZ OJURTa vacationing  in  exotic  lands.  <]MMNVTa JVM RV \QN _WZ[\ _Ja XW[[RKTN _N JTT

s  I  made  my  way  to  the  front  of  the  auditorium  in  City  Hall  that  evening  with  choral  students  from  our  town’s  \_W QRPQ [LQWWT[ 3 VW\RLNM \QJ\ \QN OWTMRVP LQJRZ[ _NZN VW_ JTT WLL]XRNM JVM \QJ\ J LZW_M [\WWM RV \QN KJLS WO \QN J]MR\WZR]U [W \QJ\ \QN K]RTMRVP _J[ TTNM :]KTRL [JON\a WO LRJT[ OZWU \QN [\J\N RV O]TT LW[\]UN P]JZMNM \QN MWWZ JVM J ,W[\WV ZNUJV RV J SRT\ XTJaNM J [JM \]VN WV \QN KJPXRXN[ I  saw  young  girl  on  the  side  texting  during  the  ceremony.  At  QNZ UW\QNZs[ ZNY]N[\ [QN X]\ \QN XQWVN J_Ja We  assembled  on  the  steps.  Our  director  raised  his  arms  \W LW]V\ ][ WOO JVM _N KNPJV \W [RVP t@N <QJTT 9^NZLWUN u JTT ^N ^NZ[N[ 9]Z ^WRLN[ ZN[WVJ\NM JPJRV[\ \QN UJZKTN LWT]UV[ and  high  ceilings  and  it  was  just  the  most  beautiful  thing. I  noticed  an  older  woman  near  the  front  of  the  auditorium  beginning  to  cry.  When  we  hit  the  lyrics  â€œwe  are  VW\ JOZJRM u _QJ\N^NZ QR\ \QJ\ _WUJV KNPJV \W QR\ UN 3 \ZRNM \W KZNJ\QN K]\ Ua \QZWJ\ QJM LTW[NM RV JVM \NJZ[ TTNM Ua NaN[ 0WZ J UWUNV\ 3 QJM \W [\WX [RVPRVP JTT \WPN\QNZ â][\ \W keep  from  breaking  down.  Normally  I  would  be  embarrassed.  ;RPQ\ \QNV R\ MRMVs\ UJ\\NZ @N VR[QNM \QN [WVP JVM TNM WOO \W \QN KJLS WO \QN auditorium  to  wait  for  the  service  to  conclude.  I  won’t  be  forgetting  that  evening. /[XNLRJTTa VW_ ,NLJ][N RV TRPQ\ WO ZNLNV\ N^NV\[ R\s[ clear  to  me  that  we  could  have  been  weeping  for  our  own  hometown.  We  could  have  been  grieving  for  our  own  victims.  @QNZN Q]UJV[ PW \ZJPNMa OWTTW_[ N^NV RV \QN TNJ[\ TRSNTa WO XTJLN[ N^NV RV 8N_\WV ĂŁVM N^NV \QN VN[\ 8N_\WV <W]\Q educations  cannot  mentally  prepare  us  for  the  impact. Stay  updated.  Stay  informed.  But  remember  that  knowledge  only  brings  limited  power;  some  things  can  only  be  learned  through  experience.  When  those  bombs  exploded  WV :J\ZRW\[ .Ja _N JTT MR[LW^NZNM \QR[ \NZZRKTN \Z]\Q Z[\QJVM ĂŁ[ <W]\Q [\]MNV\[ UJaKN _N LJV ][N W]Z SVW_TNMPN \W KN\\NZ \QN _WZTM WVN MJa ,]\ OWZ VW_ _N LJVs\ JT_Ja[ ][N W]Z knowledge  to  understand  it.

understood.  We  as  South  [\]MNV\[ J[ ,W[\WVRJV[ LJUN \WPN\QNZ RV TW^N [QWLS JVM [JMVN[[ =QN[N intense  emotions  were  nothing  we  could  have  learned  vicariously  through  mere  images  on  paper  and  in  pixels.  True  â€œprimary  sourcesâ€?  can  only  be  ourselves. Â

Reflections Prelude  to  Philosophy  of  the  Future Nietzsche  in  the  21st  century Michelino  Kenny

unsure  of  themselves.  â€œHow  we  have  made  everything  around  us  clear  and  free  and  easy  and  simple!â€?  Nietzsche  ZNUJZS[ 3V W]Z MW]K\ JVM LWVO][RWV _Ns^N W^NZ[RUXTR NM W]Z TJVP]JPN[ JVM thought  processes  for  thousands  of  years.  Only  now  have  more  of  us  begun  to  wake  up.  Let’s  take  a  look  at  the  recent  20th  century.  Absolute  truth  reigned  suXZNUN RV 0J[LR[U JVM <\JTRVR[U _W^NV by  decisive  and  power-hungry  men.  ,]\ KTRVMTa \Z][\RVP RV J \Z]\Q [QW]\NM MW_V OZWU JKW^N UJVa URTTRWV[ OWTTW_NM JVM URTTRWV[ MRNM <RURTJZTa KNOWZN \QN \Q LNV\]Za OWZ \QW][JVM[ WO aNJZ[ UW[\ XNWXTN KTRVMTa \Z][\NM _QJ\ was  shouted  down  from  positions  of  authority.  /`XTWR\J\R^N SRVP[ TNJMNZ[ JVM politicians  have  always  been  advertisers.  Advertisement  is  a  means  to  power  JVM JLLWZMRVP \W 8RN\b[LQN J[XRZRVP \W XW_NZ R[ VJ\]ZJT% t/`XTWR\J\RWV KNTWVP[ \W \QN N[[NVLN WO _QJ\ TR^N[ as  a  basic  organic  function;  it  is  a  con[NY]NVLN WO \QN _RTT \W XW_NZ _QRLQ R[ after  all  the  will  to  life.â€?  The  manipulation  of  truth  has  been  one  of  the  many  means  of  exploitation  in  our  history.  The  more  skeptical Â

The  manipulation  of  truth  has  been  one  of  the  many  means  of  exploitation  in  our  history.  The  more  skeptical  we  grow  of  such  UJVRX]TJ\RWV \QN TN[[ XW_NZ such  manipulation  has  over  us. Â

illustration by Yaara Yacoby

I

V ##" \QN XQRTW[WXQNZ JVM iconoclast  Friedrich  Nietzsche  declared  that  â€œTo  recognize  untruth  as  a  condition  of  life  â€”  that  certainly  means  resisting  accustomed  value  feelings  in  a  MJVPNZW][ _Ja JVM J XQRTW[WXQa \QJ\ risks  this  would  by  that  token  alone  place  itself  beyond  good  and  evil.â€? =WMJa 8RN\b[LQN R[ TRSNTa ZWTTRVP over  in  his  grave  in  delight.  A  survey  LWVM]L\NM Ka 6JK JV WZPJVRbJ\RWV MN^W\NM \W UJZSN\ ZN[NJZLQ ZNXWZ\NM that  only  three  percent  of  Americans  describe  advertisements  as  â€œvery  accuZJ\Nu JVM \QJ\ "! XNZLNV\ MN[LZRKNM JM[ as  somewhat  or  very  â€œexaggerated.â€?  Advertisements  are  omnipresent  in  our  fast-paced  world.  They  greet  us  WV W]Z XQWVN[ \NTN^R[RWV[ LWUX]\NZ[ _JTS[ N^NV _QRTN ZNJMRVP \QR[ ^NZa magazine.  We  are  constantly  bombardNM Ka RMNJ[ \QJ\ OWZ \QN UW[\ XJZ\ _N deem  untrue.  <RURTJZTa M]ZRVP \QN ZNLNV\ XZN[RMNV\RJT NTNL\RWV J XWTT LWVM]L\NM Ka the  Washington  Post  and  ABC  reported  that  only  45  percent  of  those  polled  considered  candidate  Mitt  Romney  tQWVN[\ JVM \Z][\_WZ\Qa u JVM WVTa ! percent  considered  Barrack  Obama  so.  Advertising  industries  and  politiLRJV[ JZN RV\RUJ\NTa ZNTJ\NM _QRLQ LJV be  seen  through  the  billions  spent  on  advertising  and  smear  campaigns  during  election  cycles.  A  Gallup  Poll  reports  that  only  nine  percent  of  Americans  have  â€œhighâ€?  trust  in  the  â€œhonesty  and  ethical  standardsâ€?  of  Members  of  Congress  and  only  seven  percent  in  those  of  lobbyists.  Nietzsche  considered  â€œUntruthâ€?  \QN Y]JTR\a WO KNRVP OJT[N J LWVMR\RWV WO TRON JVM VN^NZ QJ^N [W UJVa XNWXTN accepted  it  as  such.  A  certain  degree Â

of  untruth  has  always  been  present  in  QR[\WZa K]\ \QN PZW_RVP JLLNX\JVLN WO ]V\Z]\Q [RPVR N[ \QJ\ _N QJ^N KNP]V to  think  more  critically  and  liberate  our  minds.   Or  does  it?  Trusting  untruth  could  just  lead  to  cynicism  and  detachment.  It  seems  like  a  contradiction.  In  ,NaWVM 1WWM JVM /^RT 8RN\b[LQN LWVsiders  the  danger  of  raising  the  idea  of  J XNZ^J[R^N ]V\Z]\Q% t=QNZN R[ J ZR[S RV ZJR[RVP R\ XNZQJX[ \QNZN R[ VW PZNJ\NZ risk.â€?  But  he  also  sees  a  problem  with  so-called  truth.  â€œI  shall  reiterate  a  hunMZNM \RUN[ \QJ\ rRUUNMRJ\N LNZ\JRV\a s like  â€˜absolute  knowledge’  and  â€˜thing  in  R\[NTO s LWV\JRV[ J LWV\ZJMRL\RW RV JMâNL\W DLWV\ZJMRL\RWV RV \NZU[F% _N ZNJTTa ought  to  get  free  from  the  seduction  of  words!â€?  The  â€œseduction  of  wordsâ€?  is  especially  relevant  in  our  hyper-advertised  society.  Take  the  recent  presidential  election.  Despite  widespread  bad  press  OZWU OJL\ LQNLS[ JM^NZ\R[NUNV\[ LWVtinued  to  bend  the  truth  with  blackJVM _QR\N XZNMRL\RWV[ QJ[\a PNVNZJTRbJ\RWV[ JVM XTNV\a WO UR[XTJLNM []XNZTJ\R^N[ JVM VWV \\RVP JMâNL\R^N[ 6JVP]JPN JLLWZMRVP \W 8RN\b[LQN \JTS[ tWO WXXW[R\N[ _QNZN \QNZN are  only  degrees  JVM UJVa ZN VNments  of  gradation.â€?  No  wonder  so  many  people  do  not  believe  everything  advertisements  tell  them.  And  the  words  we’ve  creJ\NM OWZ tZN VNmentsâ€?  â€“  the  vague  â€œmaybeâ€?  and  â€œperhapsâ€?  â€“  seem  weak  and Â

illustration by Yaara Yacoby

we grow of such manipula\RWV \QN TN[[ XW_NZ []LQ manipulation has over us. With the rise of techVWTWPa JM^NZ\R[RVP QJ[ become so much more obvious and pervasive that we respond differently than in the past. The hyperbole and ZQN\WZRL QJ^N RV\NV[R NM K]\ UWZN RUXWZ\JV\Ta W]Z [NV[Rtivity to it is heightened. “What is truth?” Nietzsche asks. “A mobile army WO UN\JXQWZ[ UN\WVaU[ anthropomorphisms; in [QWZ\ J []U WO Q]UJV relations which have been subjected to poetic and ZQN\WZRLJT RV\NV[R LJ\RWV translation and decoration; truths are illusions of which

we have forgotten that they are illusions.” <W RV J LNZ\JRV [NV[N we’ve begun to liberate ourselves from blind trust and become more dependent on our increasingly critical minds. According to NiN\b[LQN t9KâNL\RWV N^J[RWV âWaW][ MR[\Z][\ JVM TW^N WO irony are signs of health; everything absolute belongs to pathology.” 3V ZNJTR\a UW[\ XNWXTN _RTT VW\ VM J[ U]LQ âWa in distrust and irony as Nietzsche would have liked. And now that we’ve begun \W \QRVS OWZ W]Z[NT^N[ _QJ\ will humankind face next? Will we fall into disillusioned PTWWU WZ XNZQJX[ ZR[N ]X

and demand an increased respect for more truth and less bullshit? As Nietzsche X]\ R\ t@QJ\ [\ZJVPN XNZXTN`RVP Y]N[\RWVJKTN Y]N[tions!” >T\RUJ\NTa J PNVNZJT truth beyond basic undeniable facts does not exist. “Truth” becomes a ques\RWV WO XNZ[XNL\R^N _QJ\ we make of our lives. But our individual perceptions should be ours alone. A reaction will not prompt the emergence of a XNZONL\ JVM \Z]Ta \Z]N \Z]\Q but it may allow us to think freely and think clearly. Whether this will lead to a modern enlightenment or a depressed cynicism remains

unclear. As Nietzsche put R\ t@N KNQWTM JTT \QRVP[ through the human head and cannot cut off this head; while the question nonetheless remains what of the world would still be there if one had cut it off.” The uniqueness of perception is an absolute truth. If we _NZN \W L]\ WOO W]Z QNJM[ _N would taste untainted truth. But I’ll take a bit of confusion and doubt over decapitation.

Copyright © 2013 The Stembridge Sword

NEWTON SOUTH, THURSDAY, MAY 30, 2013

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The Stembridge Sword 99 CENTS

2nd Issue anniversary spectacular!!! ***We did it again***

A dangerously insane man.

Words From the Wise

On the evening of May 27, 2013, the houses of every student and faculty member in the Newton Public Schools district received an automated phone call. The call stated “Hello, this is Superintendent David Fleishman, there will be no school during the month of June on account of snow.” The sudden announcement came across as odd to most Newton residents; weather forecasts predict no heavy snowfall for the Dear Oreo is an anonymous first week of June, let alone the whole month. advice column written by However, some folks are not as surprised. Oreo the chocolate lab. She is Marlene Roshan, Fleishman’s personal ^N aNJZ[ WTM JVM TRSN[ NJ\RVP KZW_VRN[ _QNV <QJZWV QNZ assistant, reports that the overwhelming W_VNZ R[Vs\ TWWSRVP amount of snow days this school year have

By Connor Donahue

Mentally Unhinged Superintendent David Fleishman Declares “Snow Month”

The Stembridge Sword Celebrates its Second Issue

Mission Accomplished

VOL. LXIX No. 618

The tasty dessert that you get to QJ^N JO\NZ VR[QRVP \QN KZWLLWTR that is the rest of the magazine

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Dyeing hair green causes student’s popularity to skyrocket

Cindarella Story

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South Stage production of Django Unchained gets too real, too fast

Southern Stage

Marlene Roshan, Fleishman’s personal assistant, reports that the overwhelming amount of snow days this school year have taken a toll on the superintendent’s psychological well-being. “Declaring a snow day is a very stressful decision.” Roshan commented, “Whether you say yes or no can have a big effect on a lot of different people. I think Dr. It’s been a wild ride. Fleishman just snapped.” Fleishman’s mental health has been By Connor Donahue called into question multiple times in the past subtle” and “ yeah, it’s pretty much the few months. The first incident occurred sevand Dylan Cloud only part of Leo I read” The Stembridge eral weeks ago when he stapled the forehead “One time, I ate some smoked Sword shot out of the minds of two of Newton Public School Committee memsalmon for dinner. It was not very ambitious highschoolers and into the ber Jonathan Yeo. Yeo reportedly approached good, but I guess it was okay.” Fleishman to ask “why he was slamming his skulls of the joke-thirsty student body. Mere moments after its release, head on his desk” when Fleishman went after — Jeff Reed The Stembridge Sword had already him with the stapler. The second instance blown its competition out of the water. was when he stripped naked and ran up and Since its debut in November Cat’s Meow editor Joe Joseph was down Commonwealth Avenue at 1:00 PM 2012, The Stembridge Sword has reported as saying “I give up. They’re last Tuesday. garnered the respect and praise “He was really, really fast,” said passerby just so funny and mad subtle,” before of some of South’s greatest minds. moving away forever. Kyle Lebowitz, “like, unnaturally fast.” “I remember when I read the first The stark-naked superintendent had Throngs of students and teachers issue of The Stembridge Sword and alike have been waiting outside doors reportedly flipped over three squad cars being awestruck by its mad subtle of Newton South since 6:00 AM this before being detained by eight police officers satire,” said junior Gobey*, “and morning. The first person to read it has and brought back to his office. “It was really now we’re approaching its second been reported as saying “I didn’t really scary,” added Lebowitz. City officials have reportedly tried their issue anniversary spectacular and get it. The first one was better.” best to fire Fleishman, but with Mayor Setti I’m still just as giddy as I was 6 months ago.” Continued on A4 Warren still on vacation, the superintendent is the most powerful man in town. “Until Founded in 2012 with the Mayor Warren comes back, David Fleishman intent of providing mad subtle * Names have been changed to protect the identity is untouchable,” stated a terrified Board of satire for cheap, The Stembridge of Michael Costello Aldermen president Scott F Lennon. Sword was an instant modern Continued on A4 classic. Hailed by readers as “mad

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No one has it harder than Denny, says Denny

Denny

New Campus Aide Looks Kind of Familiar... page A4

.NJZ =37/ :;97 Woof woof. Ha ha just kidding I can talk even \QW]PQ 3sU J MWP 9SJa NVW]PQ SRMMRVP JZW]VM TN\s[ PN\ [\JZ\NM 3 MWVs\ SVW_ U]LQ JKW]\ MJ\N[ K]\ _QNVN^NZ <QJZWV Ua UWUUa \JSN[ UN \W \QN XJZS R\s[ JT_Ja[ O]V \W QJ^N J OZRNVM around. Have you tried barking at a wall for half an hour? 5NNX R\ [\RLSa Oreo

.NJZ 9ZNW ã[ aW] XZWKJKTa SVW_ XZWU [NJ[WV R[ QNZN JVM it seems like everybody but me has a date. I went [\JP \W OZN[QUJV LZ]R[N [WXQWUWZN [TNNXW^NZ JVM [NUR 3sM TRSN \W QJ^N J MJ\N K]\ J\ \QR[ XWRV\ it’s looking like I might end up just going with a group of good guy friends. Is this okay? Am I normal? — TICKING TIME PROM

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