“Samaritan’s Purse brings hope to women all over the world who are in desperate need. We’re standing in the gap and providing quality medical care and supplemental food, teaching about proper nutrition and infant care, and o ering hygiene training to new mothers. Most importantly, we are reaching women with the Gospel and the love of Jesus Christ.” ―Cissie Graham Lynch
BEN COX: IN SEARCH OF THE REAL JESUS
How God’s Word and the Holy Spirit Changed Our Lives
Written by Ben Cox
DR. BILL HERRING: CALLED TO SERVE
Dr. Bill Herring’s Missions-Oriented Life
Written by Maggie Watts with Dr. Bill Herring
CISSIE GRAHAM LYNCH: FEARLESS FAITH
Cissie Graham Lynch’s Spiritual Journey from Childhood Faith to Discovering Her Own Identity in Christ
Written by Maggie Watts with Cissie Graham Lynch
CISSIE GRAHAM LYNCH: GOD’S FAITHFULNESS THROUGH DARK TIMES
A Conversation with Cissie Graham Lynch
Written by Ben Cox from his interview with Cissie Graham Lynch
JIM QUIGLEY: PRIDE MUST DIE
How Pride Almost Destroyed Me & How God’s Mercy & Grace Set Me Free
By Jim QuigleyThis magazine is intended to present people’s stories about their personal relationships with God from their point of view. We endeavor to have a diversity of perspectives in the testimonies we share from people who identify themselves as followers of Christ. Furthermore, we carefully and prayerfully consider the content of the stories we tell, as well as the character of those who tell them. People who share their testimonies with us have experienced God’s love in real ways, and our encouragement for you, is that you also can experience His love wherever your journey takes you.
By Ben Cox
John 5:15- “I am the vine and you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
Today is Monday, June 5, 2023. It’s time for me to write my introduction to the Magazine you’re holding in your hands or reading online. And it just so happens that my personal Bible study for today is John 15.
46 years ago the Lord used John 15 and just one phrase from this chapter to radically change the direction of my life. It was in July of 1977, three months into my new marriage to Constance (Connie) McBride Cox. We were not truly followers of Christ at the time, but we were spiritual seekers.
I had grown up in a Christian home as a Pastor’s kid and “walked the aisle to receive Jesus as my personal Savior” but I knew then that I wasn’t really sincere. It’s something my 8 year old self did, just trying to please my parents and the church people I grew up with.
But, when I was in High School in 1972, the Holy Spirit moved in the youth group of our Baptist Church and I did get truly born again! Jesus was moving by His Spirit in our town and region as well as in many other parts of the nation. Numerous people, young and old alike, got saved and experienced the baptism of the Holy Spirit in similar ways as Jesus’ first disciples did at Pentecost. It was exhilarating to be a part of!!!
My parents were relieved at what happened to me because before that amazing transformation I was on a very bad path. They didn’t quite know what to think about what had happened to me and my friends, but they did know that this son of theirs was lost but now he was found, transformed and on fire for God!
At this time in my life, at 17 years old it was time for me to think about my future. Where was I going to go to college? What was my major going to be? What career path would I pursue? My dad told me to pray about it and I did.
Much to my surprise I felt the Lord speak to my heart in a very clear way that I should pursue pastoral ministry. One thing I had always felt strongly about is that I would NEVER be a pastor.
I realize that some of that had to do with the fact that my dad had members of the church who were hard to lead because they had their own agendas about what they wanted the church to be. I hate to say this, but some of them were stubborn and belligerent at times. For example, I remember well when a group of people in the church did not like it when we were beginning to attract lower income and mixed race people to our Summer Bible School and other Summer outreaches.
My dad, along with other Christians in the church, had to withstand some strong opinions and meanness of spirit. And, I must admit, it really turned me off. But I was grateful that my dad was faithful in his calling to the church and he endeavored to teach them how to follow Christ, while demonstrating Christ-like character whether they did or not.
So, in spite of my reservations about being a pastor like my dad, I answered the call I received from God to be a pastor. I went to Mars Hill College in 1973 and I enrolled as a Philosophy and Religion Major with the intention of attending there for 4 years and then enrolling in Seminary.
But for a number of reasons, my plans and my faith got derailed. So, at 21 years of age I transferred to another school, changeed my major to english and then decided to drop out of school. The reason I dropped out is because I was in a very dark, depressed space and considering suicide as an option to escape my self-imposed suffering.
That’s when I reaffirmed my faith in God by asking Him to help me. But I was now alone in a new town and confused. So I started writing lots of God seeking poetry and decided that I was going to start all over again from ground zero to find truth and peace in other religions besides Christianity. I met my wife in that time period and what attracted us to each other was that we were very
spiritually-minded and quite sincere about seeking truth.
Connie is one of 7 children and she had a brother and sister who were also “seekers of truth” when we were. But their search had led them to Jesus, who they never got to really know in their Catholic upbringing. They knew the rituals and traditions of the church, but they did not know the real Jesus until their search for truth led them straight into His waiting arms.
Because of this, Connie’s brother, Bob, strongly resisted my claims that “all paths lead to God.” He made me angry when he told me that Buddha and Krishna and Mohammed were dead but that Jesus was alive. He challenged us to read the Bible again and to simply pray that God would reveal His truth to us about Jesus. We did and it blows my mind that Jesus pursued me like He did when I had forsaken Him.
It was at Cape Blanco State Park on the Pacific Ocean coast of southwestern Oregon where I was reading a Bible my mom had given me before we departed for our West Coast honeymoon. I’m in a meadow on a beautiful cliff overlooking the ocean when these words from John 5:15 caught my attention: “I am the vine and you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
At that point, it was as if the Holy Spirit lifted the last 6 words of this passage off the page and said to me “APART FROM ME YOU CAN DO NOTHING” and then Jesus said to me by His Spirit, “not who you have tried to make me to be or not your version of what you want Me to be, but who I really am!!!”
At that point I dropped my Bible and lifted my hands in surrender to Jesus, realizing that due to my own pride, prejudices and sinful nature, I had created a version of Jesus that was WRONG.
I, like many others have done and continue to do, had created a “gentle Jesus, meek and mild” version of God, who would never hold anyone accountable for rejecting Him. But that’s not the complete picture of who Jesus is and it does not fully square with what Jesus says about Himself or what the Scriptures proclaim Him to be. I’m so grateful that Jesus Himself used His Word and spoke to me by His Spirit to straighten me out and pull me out of deception and darkness and into the light of His truth.
Furthermore, I’m also grateful that He will faithfully work in all our lives to do that on a daily basis if we will devote ourselves to reading the Bible and asking the Holy Spirit to reveal truth to us or teach us truth on a deeper or different level than we knew before. Through the Spirit and the Word working together Jesus will conform all of His followers into His image which is so much better than
trying to get Him to conform to what we think He should be.
I recently read an article about the Jesus Revolution of the late 1960’s and early 70’s. I can’t remember who said this and I’m not sure that I’m going to quote it right, but it went something like this: “The Word without the Spirit will puff you up. The Spirit without the Word will blow you up. But the Word and the Spirit working together will GROW YOU UP.”
For 15 + years this magazine, and now our website Journeync.com, has been telling the stories of those whose lives have been changed and are being changed through placing their faith in Christ and then growing up into the fullness of who He wants us to be! We love telling the stories of how Jesus leads us through His Word and His Spirit in the context of His Church to reveal His glory to a watching world who desperately needs to see the real Jesus
May you be encouraged by the stories you’re about to read in this edition. We thank our faithful readers and sponsors and we welcome the many of you Summer visitors and new friends who will discover us through this edition.
So I was able, through a translator, to tell him that I was there because there was a God who loved me dearly and a God that loved him, and that our God had sent me to be able to try to help him.Dr. Bill Herring holding a patient in Chiapas, Mexico
Dr. Bill Herring lives a missions-oriented life. From Nepal to the Democratic Republic of Congo, to Haiti, to Peru, to Honduras, to rural Mexico, he longs to reflect the love of Jesus Christ to the nations.
Herring’s life began in eastern Goldsboro, where his mother and grandmother strongly influenced his faith. He recalls his grandmother constantly sitting by the window, reading the Bible.
“The grandmother that lived out in the country was a little, frail lady that constantly read her Bible. I can see her sitting by the window, where she could get the light, in the little rocking chair, reading her Bible. And that Bible was completely worn out,” Herring said. “I can see her to this day sitting there by the window, reading her Bible. That had a powerful influence on me as a youngster growing up.”
His grandmothers and mother consistently encouraged Herring to be a part of the local church community and Sunday school. He said he gives these women a lot of credit in regard to his faith journey.
On a youth group retreat in high school, Herring made the choice to live his life for Jesus.
“I remember a time of devotion with a group there... I made a choice that I wanted to do the best I could to live a Christ-like life. So as I think back, that’s perhaps a starting point.”
After high school, Herring attended the University of South Carolina in Columbia. He quickly got involved with Eastminster Presbyterian Church, where he met his wife, participated in the Westminster Fellowship university group, and was president of the
group.
Under the guidance of God’s hand, Herring says he was led to pursue medical school.
“Through God’s guidance I was able to get into medical school, and the rest is history. But I don’t see those things as just happening. There’s no question in my mind, and never has been, that God was leading the way,” he said.
“I always felt that part of my calling to medicine was that in some way above and beyond being able to serve as a physician and care for people and hopefully help people. I wanted to go above and beyond that and be of service to the underserved,” he said.
After moving to Boone in 1972, Herring and his wife joined the First Presbyterian Church of Boone. He immediately knew it was a missions-oriented church, and it appealed to Herring and the calling he felt for his life. Although at the time, he was still deciphering this calling.
“For a number of years I felt a calling, and it was almost like somebody was walking behind me tapping me on the shoulder saying ‘there are other things you can be doing in addition to your work with your family and your work with your practice.’ I frequently would almost look over my shoulder to see who was tapping me on my shoulder. It took me a while to realize that who was tapping me on the shoulder was the Lord, saying that ‘there are other things out there that you could do to serve,” Herring said.
In the 1980s, he answered the call and took a short-
term medical mission trip to the Democratic Republic of the Congo in the heart of Africa (then known as Zaïre).
During his month of caring for patients in a small village hospital, Herring’s life began to take a turn. “Even as a short-term missionary, I realized that that was something I wanted to be a part of for my whole life,” he said.
After this trip, Herring began going on medical mission trips for a month every year.
“I would take a month out of my year and leave my family, leave my practice, leave this community, and go somewhere in the world I felt was underserved. When I say ‘I felt’ it was always a calling. I felt directly pushed in a certain direction by the Lord,” he said. “So through the years, I did short-term work in Zaïre, and Haiti, and Nepal, and Peru, and Honduras, and, for the last 22 years, in southern Mexico. And through those experiences of serving, my faith grew tremendously. I just felt that that was something I was called to do.”
On one mission trip in Kathmandu, Nepal, God opened the door for Herring to speak His Gospel truth to a ward of lost people.
“It’s important to understand with this story that Nepal is a Hindu country... if you proselytize or try to share your faith, other than the Hindu faith, with somebody in Nepal, you can be sent to prison for eight years. So the Christian church in Nepal was an underground church — they called them house churches. And so there was not an open Christian religion.”
“There was a young man who’d had a horrible knee injury and lived in a community way up in the mountains. And he had a fracture around his knee which healed in a way that left his knee bent at 90 degrees and fixed in that position. So he could not walk, and he therefore could not work. The Nepali surgeon that I was working with asked me if I would be willing to try to tackle a surgical procedure to try to straighten his leg, so that he could be upright and be able to walk. And then the surgeon fairly quickly left town on vacation, leaving me with this challenge.”
“I was talking to this young man about the proposed surgery and what I hoped that it would do for him, and he asked me point blank, ‘Why are you here? Why are you wanting to help me?’ And I thought, here’s an opportunity. If I say too much, I don’t wanna end up in the local jail for eight years. But I thought “This is an opportunity that the Lord has given me while I’m here.”
“So I was able, through a translator, to tell him that I was there because there was a God who loved me
dearly and a God that loved him, and that our God had sent me to be able to try to help him. Well, there was a sudden quiet all around this patient’s bed... and when people realized what I was saying, there was a deathly quiet, and the young man seemed to understand.”
Herring does not know what happened to this young man beyond the medical ward. His operation was successful, and he hopes the man was able to return to his village and work. He said he doesn’t know the final outcome, but he knows he was able to tell this man that God loved him, even though it was illegal to do so.
On another mission trip in a remote mountain village of Chiapas, the southernmost state in Mexico, Herring was working at a church-run medical clinic. God provided in a mysterious, miraculous way.
“Late one afternoon some people came up from a village down below where we were working and said
that there was an elderly man who was very sick, and could we please come down and see him?”
“So at the end of our clinic, we went down, wound our way back through a number of little huts, into a very simple little hut with this very, very thin elderly male lying on a straw mat on the floor. All the family and community gathered around in this hut or around the door.”
“The language of these people is called Zeltall. It’s one of the Mayan dialects. So we had translators from Spanish to Zeltall. But an interesting feature was this man was deaf and had to be communicated with through sign language. So we had to go from English to Spanish, from Spanish to Zelltall, from Zelltall to sign language to communicate.”
“We determined that this man probably had typhoid fever. So we said we would go back up to where our clinic was and see what we had that we could treat
him with. I knew we didn’t have the best medicine for typhoid, but we went back up to the clinic into our little pharmacy that had been set up, and we found IV fluids that we could administer. We had other medicines that could be used for typhoid, but the one medicine that was best for typhoid was a medicine called Rotosephin, which I knew we didn’t have.”
“But as I was going back through the pharmacy and looking through the shelves and trying to determine
what we had that we could use to offer him any help, I looked on the shelf and there was Rotosephin. And it was not something that we had known that we had, it was not something that we consciously had taken. But somehow there was the medicine that this elderly man needed for his typhoid. I’ve said over the years that it was a God thing. I don’t know where it came from or how it got on the pharmacy shelf. We were able to treat him, and by the time we left about a week later, he was doing much better. It was one of those things where we had the means both to communicate with him from English to Spanish to Zelltall to sign language, and then subsequently we had the medication that he needed, and where it came from I don’t know.”
“There are many, many times through the years, working in a remote village or in the clinic that was subsequently built, where the only explanation I have for being able to treat and cure people was through God’s intervention,” Herring said.
“Over the last 22 years, I’ve led usually two medical trips a year to Chiapas, the southernmost state of Mex -
ico. In the early years it was to remote villages providing medical care for people, many of whom had never seen a doctor. In more recent years it’s been a clinic that we built in a town in the highlands of Chiapas.”
“What I share with people that I lead on these trips is that I think we are called to serve as Christians. To me that means to be more Christ-like. If you asked me what my favorite verse is in the Bible, I would quickly tell you the verses from Matthew 25, the final judgment, when Jesus is seated on the throne lining up the sheep and the goats. The sheep go to one side and the goats go to the other side, and the goats go to eternal hell in a burning fire. And in that scene, the people that end up with the sheep, that end up going to heaven, are those who gave drink to the thirsty and gave food to the hungry and gave clothes to the naked and visited people in prison, that whole routine. Those are the people that ended up on the right side of judgment. Those who didn’t serve the least of these are the ones who ended up with the goats.”
“We need to recognize that we are called to serve. I think that there are many, many folks today, religious folks, Christian folks, that say that all we need to do is profess that Jesus is our Lord and Savior. But I think that it goes well beyond that, in that, we need to back that up with our deeds. I realize that we’re not saved by our deeds, but I think that when we profess to be Christians, a big part of that needs to carry over into living a Christ-like life, living that spirit of Jesus, that spirit of love.”
“In chapter two of James we’re told that faith without deeds is pretty much dead. And that’s the way that I try hard to live my life. I try to reflect the love that Jesus has shown by coming to die for our sins, and I try to be able to reflect that love by the way that I treat people, with justice and with love and to reach out.”
Lynch gave her life to Christ as a child, but she came to know Him more deeply in college.
“I can remember giving my life to Christ in the car, driving from Montreat, North Carolina, from my grandparent’s home, back to Boone one night with my mom,” she said. Although some question child salvation, Lynch firmly believes in it.
When her son asked about receiving Christ at a young age, someone told her, “Your son gave all he knows of himself at five years old to all he knows about Jesus. That’s true whether we’re five or 45 when we give our lives to the Lord. We give all we know about ourselves to all we know about Christ,” she said. “So, I don’t ever question or doubt somebody’s child’s salvation and what God has done in their life at a young age.”
However, Lynch said her story is more complicated than being saved as a child. In public high school, she wrestled with being herself and discovering who God was to her.
“I really struggled having the last name Graham,” she said. “I really struggled with my faith for a bit, trying to prove that I was just Cissie — I wasn’t just Cissie Graham, but I was my own person.”
“I never fully walked away from the faith, I never doubt-
ed God’s sovereignty in my life, I never doubted God’s goodness, His holiness in my life. But I really struggled with who He was to me,” she said.
During her last two years of high school and the beginning of college, Lynch struggled with an addiction to diet pills.
“I just struggled with self-image, like many young girls do. I fell victim to the ‘90s and 2000s, of what we were told to look like in a certain standard. I knew I was under bondage. I would go to bed at night crying ‘Lord!’ I knew the right answers, I grew up knowing the right answers, I’d tell the right answers. But so many people who are struggling go to bed knowing what they’re doing is wrong,” she said. “For me, I just wanted to see myself through God’s eyes — knowing that I am engraved in the palms of His hands, that I am His masterpiece, I’m His craftsmanship. I wanted to see that, and He wasn’t answering those prayers.”
She took a semester off of college during this addiction and served with Samaritan’s Purse, where she worked in an orphanage. That’s when God radically changed her life.
“It was there that God truly healed me of my addiction. I think when you struggle with an addiction, it’s always a selfish thing. It’s ‘me, me, me.’ And we live in a self-serving world. Everything is about ourselves and putting ourselves
“I’m so thankful for those struggles because they draw you forever closer to the Lord.”Cissie Graham Lynch is the daughter of Franklin Graham and the granddaughter of Billy Graham. She lives a life of outspoken, unwavering conviction in God’s truth. But the journey there was filled with lessons, struggles, and redemption through the blood of Christ.
first. And with an addiction, I would wake up thinking of myself first thing, and I would go to bed thinking of myself as the last thing,” she said. “It was there in serving — I was working in an orphanage — I didn’t have time, I was too busy — I didn’t have time to think of myself. And it’s like God truly healed me of that. Because we know that Jesus Christ came to serve, not to be served.”
“I was stuck in a selfish motive, and in that moment of being in a different country and not thinking of myself in this world, that we are always putting ourselves first... in the morning I was rising up and I was putting God first, for the first time,” she said. “And that was healing to me. And it was over a time period where I realized ‘Woah. I don’t think I’ve struggled with my self-image in weeks or months.’
“In college, God really started moving and changing my heart... I was really opening up the scripture for the first time,” Lynch said. “I don’t doubt child salvation, but through mine, I really had to figure out who Christ was. And thankfully, it was early on in college that I had to dig deep in the scripture to know who Jesus was.”
Lynch started her Fearless podcast in June 2019, with the aim of “helping you have a fearless faith in a compromising culture.” Fearless discusses taking on cultural issues as a Christian and encourages believers to stand strong in God’s truth.
“I remember sitting in Boone, in downtown Boone, at a restaurant with a friend of mine. We were having this discussion, and it was over going to a friend of ours’ same-sex wedding. In the world we live in — I think this was 2015 — we all know and love somebody that is part of the LGBT community, whether it’s a family member or a dear friend,” Lynch said. “I saw Christian’s not knowing how to navigate their faith in this culture that is forever shifting, this culture that was becoming very hostile toward Christians. How do we balance love, and how do we balance truth? How do you balance that grace and not compromise the truth?”
“It came down to the line as ‘Look: according to scripture, same-sex marriage is wrong. It’s a sin. And in no way, shape, or form can Christians celebrate this. And so, how could I do this? I felt God calling me to stand for truth, to show your friend you don’t have to compromise that truth, but you can do it with grace. Jesus was 100% grace, and He’s 100% truth,” she said. “That’s what my heart was behind Fearless. How can we tackle some of these cultural issues that we never thought we would be facing in our culture? And how can we do it with grace? How can we always do it with love and respect toward one another? To never ever be ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and to not compromise the Gospel?”
Lynch believes the previous generation of the church preached a lot of truth, but they sacrificed grace. In contrast, she said many churches today emphasize the grace of Jesus while sacrificing His truth.
“I’m watching these churches one after another, pastors too, that don’t talk about these tough cultural subjects because they don’t want to offend anybody. They lack the truth, and the truth is what is gonna set people free,” Lynch said.
Daniel 11:32 (ESV) says “...the people who know their God shall stand firm and take action.” Lynch said she has clung to this verse throughout recent years.
“We have to know God. There’s a difference in knowing about God and knowing God. We have to know Him. We have to know His attributes, the holiness of God, the love of God, what angers God,” she said. “Those who know their God will be able to stand in strength, so you’ll be able to stand in this culture that we face. And you’ll be able to take action, whether that’s in your job, whether that’s among your friends. Now, you will lose jobs, there will be sacrifices to make. But for the holiness of God, it’s worth it.”
“I grew up in a wonderful Christian home where our faith was lived out. The same Graham’s you saw in public is what you saw behind the scenes,” she said.
“My mom was always full of grace. Now, with my mom, you didn’t mess around,” Lynch said. “She meant business. My mom’s yes meant yes or no meant no — that’s another thing I’ve always learned from my mom. And if my mom said she was gonna do something — you know, if you disobey, this is gonna happen — you knew it was gonna happen.”
She said her mom was filled with truth, but it didn’t take away from her grace.
“I felt like maybe that was an example of God’s Word. God’s Word is truth. He is the sovereign God. His Word is His Word. But He’s also full of grace and love. And I think my mom, that’s how she was. She set that example, and my father did as well — full of truth, but always of grace too,” Lynch said.
She recalls seeing her parents reading the Word each morning when she woke up as a child.
“I didn’t realize at the moment, how important that was, until I became a mom. And I wanted my children to know where Mom would seek wisdom, where their mother wanted to find wisdom, where their mom would find strength and the solid rock that they stand on. So, when my kids were little — I mean, they’re still little — but, especially in those early years, when they would wake up super early, I would be at the table reading my Bible. Or even if I finished before they would wake up, I would always keep my Bible open, because I wanted them, first thing in the morning, to see that,” she said. “And I would ask my son, ‘What is this?’ And he would go, ‘It’s truth, Mama.
And what is truth?
‘It’s the solid rock that we stand on. It’s God’s Word.”
Lynch’s husband is retired NFL player Corey Lynch, and at the time of this interview in the Spring of 2022, they had two children, Austin and Margaret. The husband and wife met during college when Corey was playing football at Appalachian State and Cissie was a student at Liberty University, before she transferred to App. They met at a Graham family lunch with other App State football players.
“My mom kind of adopted a lot of these guys and would let them come hang out at the house, or do their laundry at the house, or she would take them out to eat. And it was over time that I really fell in love with his heart,” she said. “His football poster was all over the town at the time, and I didn’t realize what a big deal he was in the football world. I didn’t track with App football at the time, which I’m so thankful for. Because, as a young girl at like 19, normally that would be the first thing you would notice, like ‘Oh this football star, he’s on the poster.’ And I didn’t even notice things like that, and I’m so thankful. I think God kind of blinded me from all of that. And I really, truly fell in love with his heart, that he didn’t compromise his stand with the Lord. And it reminded me a lot of my father. And he was not ashamed of the Gospel. Once again that reminded me a lot of my father.”
Lynch recalls a chant the football team would do, which included curse words. Corey stood strong for his convictions and went against the flow.
“He stood up and said ‘We are not gonna do that because not all of us on this team stand for that kind of language.’ And they listened to him. He was a leader on that football field,” she said. “He set himself apart from the world, and in the football world that’s hard to do. Eventually, they led a very special Bible study on that football team. Anybody that would track with them knew there was something different about them. And I believe it’s because the Lord was the center.”
A retired NFL player, Corey continues to stand for God’s truth today.
“As a Christian, the eyes of the world are on you. They want to see if you practice what you preach, if the Jesus that you talk about in Bible study is the same Jesus He is on game day, or in the hardships — when Cory was injured or got fired from a team. I just remember the world was watching for a reaction,” Lynch said. “You know, you have to watch what you say, you have to watch what words come out of your mouth, you have to watch what you wear because they wanna see, ‘Are you different from their life?”
“It doesn’t matter — in the NFL, in the corporate world, whatever business — as a Christian, you’re gonna be mocked,” she said. “But they wanna see ‘is God still gonna be your God during the hard times?”
Though Cissie’s opportunities for ministry are many and she and Corey lead busy lives, she said that no matter what opportunities come about, she strives to put family first in everything.
“You only have your children for a short time. The scriptures say they are olive shoots around our table, and these olive shoots you have like 12 years before they start producing and going out. [Psalm 128:3] We have our children for such a short time. Our greatest mission field is our kitchen table, and we only have our children for a short time,” she said. “We can’t say yes to everything. We’re not meant to say yes to everything. And family time comes first before anything.”
“My brother Will really helped me with this when he taught me to draw wisdom from 1 Samuel 24-26, where David spares Saul.”
“David had the opportunity to kill Saul in the cave and he didn’t. That opportunity was presented to him but he knew that wasn’t right,” she said. “What that taught me is that not every open door is meant to go through.”
“We feel like we have to say yes to every opportunity, like we have to make something of ourselves, like if we say no we’re losing an opportunity, like we’re gonna lose money, like we’ll lose influence, especially in the world I’m in. And I think God has just given me peace not to say yes to everything. I have learned that in my life I’ve had to say no,” Lynch said.
God currently has Lynch in Florida, but Boone holds a special place in her heart.
“I am grateful that I grew up in Boone, North Carolina; that I could travel the world with Samaritan’s Purse and see the things of the world and travel in different cultures. But I was so thankful that I always got to come back to our small, family farmhouse in Boone, North Carolina. And growing up, I can always remember in high school, people were like ‘I wanna go do this,’ and ‘I wanna travel and do this,’ and ‘I wanna move to New York City,’ or ‘go L.A. and California,’ or all these dreams. And, honestly, I didn’t care wherever the Lord called me. I was so grateful that I grew up in a small town. But it’s funny to see now, so many people that have children. My friends are moving back from the big cities to Boone to raise their children. Boone is a special place, and I’m very grateful that the Lord had me grow up there.”
Keep an eye out for our video interview of this story at www.JourneyNC.com!
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We first interviewed Cissie Graham Lynch in 2022, from which our first story in this magazine entitled “Fearless Faith” was written. Since that interview, Cissie has had a new baby and has learned more about clinging to God in hard seasons.So, we arranged another Zoom interview with Cissie to find out what God is doing in her life right now and to tell us about the newest member of the Lynch family. What follows is an abbreviated version of that interview, which we will post online at thejourneync.com after the magazine is published.
Ben:
“We heard about your new baby on your “Fearless” Podcast. One thing I appreciated about your comments in that post is also something that I appreciated about you from our first interview. That is you are very transparent. You let people know your struggles. So with that in mind, why don’t you walk us through your birth story and then update us on where you currently find yourself in your journey to baby number three.”
Cissie:
“Yeah, so 2022 definitely rocked the world, my world, and the Lynch family. We had a baby. I was very private about it. I didn’t even tell some of our family till after we were halfway through. Most of my friends did not know until I was about seven months pregnant. We had a little girl on November 29 of 2022. Her name is Georgia Graham Lynch. And I share that story and my journey of those nine months in that broadcast that you’re referring to, ‘I Lost a Bet... And Here’s the Rest of the Story,’ as Paul Harvey would say.
We wanted a third baby for quite some time. And for different reasons, I was just okay with having two.
I had really struggled in all my pregnancies with very deep depression and anxiety. With my first child, I didn’t know anything about that. You hear a lot about postpartum with women. But then it really struck me in my pregnancies.
Depression and anxiety are not words that I used to normally describe myself. But when you become somebody that you don’t recognize, you really just want to hide away from the world. And in my months of pregnancy, I become a person I don’t recognize. For a culture that can talk about depression and anxiety more, I do think there are times that we overuse those words a lot. But for me during those nine months, it was very real. And so it just becomes a dark time.”
Ben:
“So you’re saying that postpartum depression and anxiety happened with both of your prior pregnancies?”
Cissie:
“Yeah, and that was one reason why I didn’t want to have
a third.
So anyways, as I’m getting older, as we’re all getting older, Corey and I were just praying about it, knowing that the time was probably short to have a number three if we were going to. Corey got to the point, he wanted a baby. He was so excited and wanted one so bad that he would even ask in front of our friends. ‘Oh, I want one more baby. Come on.’ He would
ask in front of my parents. Just as a joke. And so he said it one night in front of our friends at a party in a bar where there was an ax-throwing venue.
Actually, it wasn’t even a party. It was five in the afternoon when they had open slots at this place to go ax throwing, which tends to be a trend around this country right now. I don’t really understand the ax-throwing trend, but we were doing it and had never done it. I was pretty terrible.
And then I was getting in the swing of things. And I was like, ‘I’m pretty good.’ I beat Corey in one of the rounds. I was like ‘I could beat him.’ So I just said, ‘Okay, here it is. If I win, you never ask me again in front of anybody. And if you win, we’ll try.’ So I keep my word. I’m very competitive too. He’s not the only competitive one. Maybe I might be even more competitive than him. So I lost. I couldn’t believe it. So I said double or nothing. I lost twice. And I quit right then. And, like I said, God will teach you about making a bet. And here we are three kids now.”
Ben:
“Yeah. Well, since God is sovereign over the affairs of men and nations He’s sovereign over yours as well. So, it is God’s will for Georgia to be among us.”
Cissie:
“Absolutely. And it was a very difficult time.
A lot of people didn’t understand that because I know pregnancy can be such a happy time. And of course, there was guilt for me, knowing that there are women out there that would want to have a baby. And here I was struggling with deep depression and anxiety which could have been one of the darkest times of my life thus far. And it’s a lonely time when you walk through a journey like that. Even your family can’t quite understand it. They just think maybe you’re private about it. Even your spouse can’t quite understand the extent of what you’re facing.
And what I do know is that even in the darkest moments of life, God can be trusted. Yes. And it’s in those dark moments that he might be closer than ever.
But I did pray, I prayed for nine months, just crying out to the Lord. And it was silent. And sometimes people think that silence means He’s far. But I had to remind myself of the truth that I know to be true; The truth that Scripture says that
“He is”. In Scripture, there are over 30,000 promises that He has made, many about his character, many about his love and faithfulness towards his children. Some of those promises He’s made are dependent on our actions and what we do, but I had to be true. I had to hold on to what I knew to be true, even though I didn’t feel it. Even though the enemy would use that dark time to tell me great lies in my heart.
So it’s when people walk through that dark time, I would encourage them out of obedience, that’s when we walk and we open up our Bible in the Scriptures and read His truth, even when we don’t feel like it. We turn on the music, and the hymns or the worship songs even when we don’t feel like listening. We get on our knees and we pray even when we don’t have the words to speak. And we do it out of obedience. Because in that darkness, we know the light will pierce through that. Scripture says that the light cannot be overcome by the darkness. And I would just encourage people that when you’re walking through that, you just keep going and do what you know to be true.
People would tell me stuff and I knew the right answers. Hey, as a Graham who has been in ministry for a long time, I’ve heard my parents give the right answer. I’ve even been with friends in this situation, and what I would say to them, I just had to hold on to that. And to walk through it and know that He would get me through it. And here we are. And I got a beautiful little girl. I still feel kind of raw at the moment, like a deer in headlights coming out of last year because it was a big year in other ways as well.
Our home was hit by Hurricane Ian here in Fort Myers, Florida when I was about eight months pregnant. I didn’t lose my home. But our street was hit. Our whole town was just devastated by this hurricane. There are parts of our town that are just wiped out, it literally looks like a bomb dropped on it. I had to evacuate by myself with the two other kids.
Corey was still working up in Alaska with “Operation Heal Our Patriots” a ministry of Samaritan’s Purse. And he was gone for five months. So we only saw him three or four times during those five months. And the hurricane hit and it was devastating here in our town. That was right before the baby was born, like a month before. So I had to evacuate to Boone, to the High Country. We had to pray that night not knowing what was going to happen if we lost our home—we might have to kind of turn back to Boone being our temporary home until the baby was born. But the Lord thankfully protected our home. There are many on our streets that did flood. Every street around us flooded. And, thankfully, it just
got up to our doors and not in. So yeah, last year was crazy.”
Ben:
“And so you’re saying to us that when you were eight months pregnant, you were in a dark time in terms of your emotions and feelings. And then on top of that, Corey was in Alaska when one of the many devastating weather events rocked your own home town. So I mean, talk about going through the valley, right?”
“Yes, sir.”
Cissie:
Ben:
“I love the fact that you emphasize doing the right thing even when you don’t feel like it. It brings to mind the scripture that says, “the just shall live by faith” from Habakkuk 2:4. You also mentioned that one of the problems that our culture has is that people let emotions guide them instead of the word of God.
So you’re saying you were anchored in God’s Word even though your emotions and circumstances were telling you something else. But I want to ask you, is there anyone you reached out to share what you were going through at that time?”
Cissie:
“There were only, I think, two or three people that knew before I even let my family know. One of them was Kay Arthur. Kay Arthur [Christian author, Bible teacher, and founder of Precept Ministries International] is a well-known name, in maybe an older generation of Bible teachers. And I’d gone up to spend a couple of nights with her.
She had become a mentor of mine over the last few years, and she asked me the question of how I was, and I just, I couldn’t hide it. I had broken down and just cried; she just hugged me and held me. She didn’t have to say much. She didn’t say anything at first, not for the first session where we’re talking, you know, that first dinner. She just held me and she asked me some really raw questions where I could be really honest and questions that most people probably wouldn’t ask.
And I could be 100% authentic with her and truthful, knowing that she was there to love me. But she didn’t say anything. She asked a couple of questions and just hugged me. And then the next day is when she would open up her Bible, and we would read. And she would, you know, check in with me periodically, and just knew the hardships of what I was facing, and just the true feelings.
Read aloud twice a day for 21 days; once in the morning and the last thing at night. If you miss a day, START OVER. Don’t try to “make anything happen,” JUST READ! This will change your life.
I think people can say we’re lonely, we’re lonely. But I think God allows times of loneliness. Seasons of loneliness are not bad, as I’ve been taught, and sometimes we want to fill that void so quickly. I know a lot of women who have to move because of their husband’s jobs and find themselves in a lonely city, or a lonely town. And I always remind people that a season of loneliness is not going to last forever. But it’s also a time for us to hear from the Holy Spirit.
Though it’s sad, I think it’s true that we may have removed the job of the Holy Spirit in our lives. So, God allows those lonely seasons to speak to us; where He removes all of those other voices, but you’re going to hear from Him. And like I said, I didn’t hear from Him right away, there was a silence. But I had to hold on to those truths, knowing that His ear is inclined to us as the Psalms say, and He hears our cries, knowing that it is in His time and not mine.”
Ben:
“Yes. And it’s in those seasons that anybody who’s lived life long at all, and gone through trials and struggles, they know that it’s in those seasons that the roots grow deeper. And I love the fact that you persevered through God’s silence.
Cissie:
Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display Itself haughtily. It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); It is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s Love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong]. It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fade-less under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fade out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end]. As for prophecy (the gift of interpreting the divine will and purpose), it will be fulfilled and pass away; as for tongues, they will be destroyed and cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away [it will lose its value and be superseded by truth].
1 Corinthians 13:13 and so faith, hope, love abide... of these three; but the greatest of these is love.*
“Yeah. And I would encourage those that may be listening, when you do know a friend who is going through a dark place, hug them. Listen to them. Do something for them. It will mean more than you think it does. Because you can tell people something, maybe with an expectation that they might respond or something. That expectation might not be fulfilled. So I would just encourage those who are listening that would know a friend, to go take a walk with them. Go take them out for coffee.”
*Agape - Unconditional Love
Scripture taken from the Amplified Bible, Copyright © 1987 The Lockerman Foundation. Used by permission of Zondervan.
Live-stream
Ben:
“Yeah, no judgment zone. I also really appreciate what you said about we are not the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit’s got to bring comfort and when we’re with somebody who’s struggling, we have to be sensitive to the Holy Spirit, and understand the Holy Spirit may sometimes say, ‘You don’t need to say anything right now.’ It’s like, we know the Scriptures. We want to kind of fix somebody. That’s not our job. That’s the Holy Spirit’s job.”
Cissie:
“There’s a time to be silent, and a time to care, a time to take action. So I’m thankful for that in Kay’s life. And she taught me that through her own example. But I also want people to know, through all of it, that we have a better day coming.”
Ben:
“He’s with us always, whether we feel it or not. So I think that’s really a big theme of your testimony. That’s His promise, ‘I’ll be with you always, even to the end of the earth (Matthew 28:20).’”
Cissie:
“Yep. And even in those dark times, He can be trusted in those darkest moments of our lives.”
Ben:
“Well, I’m just grateful that God Is using you to re-emphasize that truth to someone who may need to hear it.. You’ve got a public platform and in that dark time, He gave you the wisdom to get through it. It was wise to remain hidden at the time, and now it’s great that you’re willing to share your story with others. I appreciate your vulnerability because, again, you’re comforting others with the comfort you yourself have received from Christ. So thank you so much.”
Cissie:
“Well, thank you. Thank you for having me again for part two.
We’re grateful the Lynch family got a plus one and we’re so grateful to see how the Lord uses her in our lives. We’re trying to figure it out together, navigating work and another baby. But we’ll get there. And it’s pretty precious to watch, her siblings love her.
It was a very sweet time to have her near Christmas time. Putting on Christmas music and listening to those words. And knowing kind of like the breath of heaven, where Mary’s praying in those dark times for the breath of heaven and clinging to the Lord. That’s what I did, and it was a desperate time. It was hard. And I can honestly say now I am thankful for that time.”
Keep an eye out for our video interview of this story at www.JourneyNC.com!
I had a good childhood. I am the oldest of four, and my parents did their best. I attended private Christian school until eighth grade and attended church most Sundays and Wednesdays. I went to youth group, played baseball, and participated in the Boy Scouts. I said the sinner’s prayer at a young age and identified strongly as a believer in Jesus. I knew He died to make me right with God. I even lead others to Christ during sleepovers at my house. One year I got in trouble for bringing our Jewish doctor’s son to observe a Christian presentation.
I am part of the last generation that came home when the street lights came on and had what seemed to be an irresponsible amount of freedom to roam the neighborhood on my BMX bike, hanging out with my friends. I still look back on those days with fondness.
As an adult, I had to reflect on my life and where things “turned south.” In that neighborhood, in my school, and with my friends, I desired to be the most well-thought-of. I wanted to be popular. I wanted to have the best stuff compared to
my peers. I was jealous when I felt I was behind. If I felt less, I would devise ways to get back on top. I would do something to be “cool,” like take a risk and steal some candy from the 7-11 or pick a fight with anyone perceived as weaker in our group. It may seem that I was consciously calculating, but it wasn’t that. I did these things almost without thinking. Only in the reflection of the past and the help of God and His truth have I been able to discern the behavior.
“There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end, it leads to death. Even in laughter the heart may ache,and rejoicing may end in grief. The faithless will be fully repaid for their ways, and the good rewarded for theirs. The simple believe anything, but the prudent give thought to their steps. The wise fear the Lord and shun evil, but a fool is hotheaded and yet feels secure.” Proverbs 14:12-16
At 12, my parents moved our family to a suburb. Things got worse with a new school, new neighborhood, and the same mentality. I was very behind in my status among these new
All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.
1 Peter 5: 5b-6 NIV
was necessary to be liked in and out of the classroom. Being a high school dropout, I discovered I had a knack for comprehension and test-taking. I could get good marks by just listening in class without studying much. Study groups became times to show off. I didn’t need to study so I would encourage the party. I began drinking a lot. After graduating, I applied for a bunch of departments. My lack of mature social skills and showing up to a few interviews with the aroma of the night before still present, put me at a severe disadvantage in being considered for a job in life safety. I soon found myself floundering again.
“others” and needed to take drastic measures to obtain the image of “cool” and “popular” that I desired. I got suspended for the first time for fighting in school. I started sneaking out in my parent’s car at night and picking up friends to joyride.
My parents divorced when I was 14. It was almost like the gloves came off. With my father not around as much, I could bulldoze my mother to get my way. I began to stay out late, drinking and searching for marijuana. Most people I thought of as “cool” smoked weed. My mother couldn’t communicate with my father because of their conflict, so I began to test boundaries. I got a part-time job, bought a car, and began skipping school. I met an extremely promiscuous girl and stopped going to school altogether. I got another job at 17 and moved in with some friends.
Things went downhill fast. I started selling drugs and began using cocaine. I was introduced to the underground rave scene in South Florida and lived to party. I began frequenting underground clubs in Fort Lauderdale and Miami using designer drugs like ecstasy. I tried very hard to “fit in” with this scene, but I did not possess the attributes to make it. The “it” crowd that dressed a certain way and had impressive dance skills were the VIPs at every party we went to. I was always banished to the line to wait my turn to get in. I needed a different scene.
At 20, I put forth a solid effort to change. I was in love with a girl, and she thought she was pregnant. I swore off drugs and decided to make something of myself. I signed up for EMT school and was determined to become a firefighter. Soon after starting school, we found out the pregnancy was a false alarm, and that relationship ended. I found myself in a strange new place. I was no longer around drug users but career-oriented people, and my desire to be highly thought of was again driving me.
I excelled in EMT school and then fire academy. I did what
After success becoming a certified EMT/Firefighter but having no job to show for it, I felt enormous pressure to produce. I responded to an ad in the classifieds, “Fire sprinkler helpers wanted.” I learned about fire sprinklers in the academy, so it made sense. I suddenly found myself in a union trade. Things started innocently enough. I worked with a couple of seasoned journeymen, and they told me how to navigate the trade and become successful. Then I met the “cool” guys in my profession. They snuck off to the bar at lunchtime and would tell the tales of the great mischief they had been involved with over the years. Again wanting to be part of the “it” crowd, I did what was necessary.
After some battle testing and earning trust, I was shown how to use my excellent union insurance to visit doctors and get pain medication for next to nothing. At this point, I learned how to drink almost around the clock and use medication to function while working. The stories of fun mischief never really materialized, either. Instead, I would hear stories of broken marriages and estranged children. These guys had pretty miserable lives, and I began to feel stuck. I needed something new.
I’m 24 at this point, and I began to return to the people of my past. Some of them had never really left the party scene. I had been estranged from these people for years, and trying to return didn’t work out well. I had grown into an obnoxious drunk who would brag about my future with the union because
I had to bring something of value to my image. I think everyone there realized that I wasn’t even buying the stories I was selling, and this short attempt to re-enter a scene I had left became awkward.
One night while wanting to make an exit, I bought ecstasy, something I had not taken in years, and I found myself in a strange after-hours club in a strip mall about ten minutes from where I lived. I spent the next few hours getting severely intoxicated, and when I emerged from the club at approximately 7am, I was certainly out of my mind from all that I had ingested.
To understand why I did what I did next, it is important to know I had been showing up to church about once a month for the last six months. I did this because I would see my mom and people I had known my whole life, making me feel good. My mom would shower me with attention and usually take me to
lunch. I was always up for a good meal, and I could also usually get a few bucks from her. So as I left the club out of my mind that morning, instead of attempting to drive 10 minutes to my house, I decided to drive 45 minutes to the apartment where my three siblings lived. I thought I would make everyone breakfast, and we could all go to church together to see Mom, and have lunch after. I was pulled over about a mile from the apartment for doing 70 mph in a 35. I was arrested for DUI. I sometimes wake up at night in disbelief that I didn’t kill someone that day. I have almost no recollection of most of the trip.
I do remember one thing as clear as day that morning. While in the cell, I said the first prayer out of true humility in a long time. I didn’t ask God to get me out of this immediate predicament. I had the full conviction my life was out of control, and I asked God for help.
Somehow I was able to manipulate enough people to get out of jail and get my truck out of impound. I was at work Monday morning. But things were very different. I had no hope and was fantasizing about dying in a car accident on my way home when my phone rang. My pastor had heard of my arrest, and I just wept as I tried to find the words to tell him what was going on. I told him how hopeless life was and how it would be better if it were all over. He prayed for me and asked if he could visit my job at lunch. Feeling I would be struck by lightning if I said no to my childhood pastor, I agreed. I don’t remember what he said, but I know I returned from that lunch feeling loved. I caught a little hope. He repeated his lunch visits the rest of the week and made sure to get my commitment to be at service Sunday. The next week he asked me what I was going to do about my drug use, and I told him I knew of an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting down the street from my house I could attend. I had been there recently because a friend had to attend to save his job and didn’t want to go alone. I was intoxicated at the meeting but remembered it was close to my house. I went back to that meeting and picked up a white chip of surrender which began a six-year stint of sobriety. White chips symbolize starting the journey to sobriety.
” for this story, you need to know that even though I wasn’t abusing substances and was on a positive trajectory, I had not dealt with my pride.Left to Right: JP, Jim, Elvie, and Phoebe
My life launched like a rocket ship. Everything was new to me. I tell people I became like Jim Carrey’s character in Yes Man. If asked to go to a meeting, I would say yes. Any invitation to a bible study was accepted. If the deacons had a service project, I was first to sign up. I became a new person at work. My superintendent took notice, and I landed a job building a resort in the Bahamas for a few months. Two years passed by fast, and it was hard to keep up. I had discovered the world of recovery and theology, and it was like I couldn’t get enough. That desire for prominence was still alive; in my mind, I needed all the answers to make it. Construction was no longer good enough, and I was going to have to get more education. At 26, I left the union and entered Columbia International University to pursue full-time ministry.
College was wonderful, and I have fond memories I could tell you about, but for this story, you need to know that even though I wasn’t abusing substances and was on a positive trajectory, I had not dealt with my pride. In school, I repeatedly told the very story you have just read. I lived for the attention I would get in telling it. People seemed so impressed that I was once lost and, like a phoenix, had risen from the ashes. At some point, I stopped including how gracious God had been with me, and He was more of an afterthought in the tale. What was important was me. I was who I wanted people to be impressed with. By the time I graduated, I was getting sick of my stories and needed something new. I was ripe for a fall, and fall I did.
After six years of sobriety and graduating from Bible college, I was involved in a car accident resulting in two artificial spine disks and a large settlement payout. An old friend, whom I had always thought of as one of the coolest guys I knew, stayed in touch with me throughout college. He had seen me at my worst and was impressed with my newfound success. Because of that, he presented me with a business opportunity that took me out of the life that I’d been living and into a bad scene in a
tropical paradise. The reality is I found myself removed from every last protective barrier I had and relapsed into three years of enough drugs and alcohol to turn me into the crazy ex-pat that wandered the town and who people made fun of. The last month I was there, I was beaten in the parking lot of a hotel that closed my eyes for a couple of weeks. When I eventually healed up, I flew back to Florida, never to return to Costa Rica again.
Things didn’t get any better when I returned home. Everyone knew I was in trouble, but how do you help the Bible college graduate who once had six years of sobriety? If anyone tried, I quickly shut them down. I spent the next two years in Florida trying to fix myself. I went back to the meetings and church. I said all the right things and showed up to all the invites, but I couldn’t ever put together more than 30 days without a substance. Being high was the only time I could escape the reality of life. I was an absolute failure, and I couldn’t stand for people to see me this way. I was put on psych meds, went to multiple rehabs, and was hospitalized three times for suicidal ideation. I spent weeks in detoxes and had surgeries on my arms to remove infections from IV drug use. One doctor told me I was 24 hours away from losing my right hand, but they caught it just in time.
At the same church, a different pastor came alongside me to help. I was a little older than this guy, and he had a young family. He and his wife came up with a dramatic rescue plan. They invited me to move into their guest house, and he gave me a maintenance job at the church. I was basically on 24-hour surveillance and was given responsibilities to maintain. Within two weeks, I had scoped out the spot for a dealer to deliver me drugs to the church where nobody would notice.
My pastor took his family to the green market downtown on Saturdays for coffee and fresh donuts. I remember how excited his children were to go, so it made sense they were at my door bright and early to get me going so they could go. After not responding to the door, my pastor and his children found me unconscious on the floor. I had overdosed at night and laid there for some time, breathing very shallowly. After a few days in the hospital, my pastor visited me perplexed. After lots of thought and prayer, he told me he thought he might have an answer to what was going on with me. He said he did not believe he was dealing with an unbeliever but someone that had not repented in a long time. Bedside, he read James 5:14-16a to me, which says “Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” He explained that he thought I was sick because I had not confessed my sin in a long time, and he offered to do it with me that day. I wish I could tell you I took him up on the offer, but I was still so proud. I told him that he would be the first person I called if I ever felt like doing that.
My mom was the last person still speaking to me, and she picked me up from the hospital. I assumed she would give me a place to stay, but I was wrong. In desperation, my mom sought help and learned about enabling and practicing tough love. When it became clear that she wasn’t letting me come home,
I had her drop me off at a house my friend had permission to live in if he kept the lawn cut. My mom, reluctant to leave me, sat in the driveway and wept while I said things to her I can’t repeat here.
When she gathered herself, she called me over to her car window and said something I will never forget. She said she loved me more than I will ever know but needed me to know something. She said that because of the choices I continued to make, even if she saw me eating out of a dumpster, she would not help me anymore.
Two things were true at that moment; I believed my mom, and, for the first time, I felt I had run out of resources for help. As soon as she pulled away, my friend and I got high. I lived in that house for two weeks. I slept on a bed I had fashioned out of someone’s dirty laundry and found ways to get high.
I have a cousin who is what I would describe as a vocal atheist. Because of living with our family for a few years when I was growing up, she always called me her little brother. She had gotten the news about my predicament and was determined to formulate a plan. She had two main criteria: get Jim out of Florida and get Jim to a long-term program. She asked if I would go if she found something. Anything was better than my current situation, so I was agreeable. After some research, she presented me with two places, one in Texas and one in Boone, NC. I remember she liked the Texas program, but I chose Boone because when I was growing up, we had vacationed there, and when I was in college, we skied there, so I was at least a little familiar with the place. Her response to my choice was, “Well, that is probably the better choice for you because they talk about all that God stuff you went to school for.”
When I arrived in Boone, the desire was there. I was scoping out the environment and looking for my angle. I felt at an advantage because it was a Christian rehab, and I had my education to impress with. I began Freedom Farm like I entered
any new social environment, letting my pride lead the way. Everything changed on my first Wednesday.
At that time, the pastor from Alliance Bible Fellowship spent his Wednesday evenings ministering to the men at Freedom Farm. I had heard him preach that Sunday, and I was impressed with his sermon, so I was glad to see him. He started the evening by telling us he had something in his heart to share with us. He said he wanted to talk to a particular group of men. This got me curious. He continued and said the way he saw it was, there were just two groups of men in the room that night. I immediately perked up because I wanted to ensure I was in the right group and needed to know how to make the grade. He said there were men who have never had a relationship with Christ and were in a good place to learn how to have one, but that’s not who he wanted to address. I was all ears at this comment because I didn’t need to hear another evangelistic appeal, and it sounded like he had something else to say.
He continued and said he wanted to speak to men who already had a relationship with Christ but landed in a place like Freedom Farm because of their behavior. He had my full attention now because he was describing me. He said that people in this situation commonly think to themselves that because of their sin, God is far away, and they had a lot of making up to do
to get close to Him again. He said if you are thinking this way, it is not true. He then explained the remedy of confession and repentance that leads to restoring the broken fellowship believers experience when they are in an unrepentant state. After the explanation, I knew what I had to do. It was the same thing my pastor friend was trying to lead me to in that hospital room in Florida when I resisted because of my pride.
He called for a quiet time of prayer and encouraged any of us who needed to do business with the Lord not to wait another minute. I said a blessing out of true humility, similar to when I was in jail many years ago. I confessed my sin before God and asked Him to heal me and restore His fellowship (James 5:1416a).
March of 2023 marks 12 years since that evening. The Lord restored a conviction of the Spirit that I had quenched with my sin. With it He has also given me the gift of seeing my pride in living in such a way that I hate it.
Today I am a husband to Elvie and daddy to Phoebe and JP. I get to tell people struggling with substance abuse how God can change them from the inside out and make everything new when they lay down their pride and truly repent.
3470 US Hwy 221 North Crumpler, NC 28617
email@ashelawn.com
www.AsheLawn.com
Phone: 336-982-2121
Recorded Obituary: 336-982-2120
300 Main St. West Jefferson, NC 28694
email@badgerfuneralhome.com
www.BadgerFuneralHome.com
Phone: 336-246-7114
Recorded Obituary: 336-246-5526
Bringing Burke and Caldwell organizations together to maintain the legacy of community-based hospice care.
As AMOREM, we offer our communities more quality. more compassion. more support.
A testimony of God’s grace at work through Amorem Hospice & Palliative Care
BOONE - Willard Cordell, an AMOREM hospice patient, lived in a camper for nearly a decade before several High Country organizations, including AMOREM, helped him find comfortable housing.
AMOREM first met Cordell when his wife was admitted to hospice services through the organization. AMOREM’s clinical team would travel to the family’s camper to provide comfort care to Cordell’s wife. Concerned about the Cordell’s living situation, AMOREM staff wanted to find conventional housing for the Cordell family, but Willard and his wife were unwilling to move without their dog Scruffy.
Due to Cordell’s wife’s progressing illness, it was necessary for her to be transported to the AMOREM patient care unit in Hudson to receive inpatient hospice care.
“AMOREM helped my wife so much,” says Cordell, “She was able to do whatever she wanted to do, and I was able to go down and spend time with her in the patient care unit.”
Years ago, Cordell and his wife built a home near Beech Mountain with an A-frame and a large porch to enjoy the mountain views. Unfortunately, the house underwent significant damage throughout the years deeming it unlivable.
The Cordell’s purchased an RV to park and live in near the property that the home is on. Tragically, the RV caught fire due to an electrical issue just days after the couple purchased it, leaving the Cordell’s and their dog homeless.
Cordell, who never seems to be defeated, was assisted
service coordinator at the Boone Hospitality House, Edie Tugman, mayor pro tem of Boone and Myra Dobbins with Watauga Village Apartments, Cordell was placed on a 200-person waitlist for an apartment in the High Country.
“Willard’s story broke everyone’s heart,” says Doege, “Once the news of Willard spread, the entire community came together and went above and beyond to help him.”
by Edie
Tugmanin purchasing a smaller camper that the Cordell family could move into.
“We did whatever it took,” says Cordell, “and we were happy to do so.”
When Cordell, his wife and Scruffy shared the camper, they would lay a garden hose in the sunlight to warm water for showering, they withstood freezing nights and days without power and climbed into a loft-style bed each night to sleep.
“My wife and I lived a rough life but, we didn’t mind it one bit,” Cordell said. We enjoyed it, really. We knew that we wanted to build a home to leave behind for our son so, that’s exactly what we did.”
After nearly a decade of living in the camper, Cordell was diagnosed with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and was admitted to hospice services through AMOREM.
Scruffy and Cordell’s wife died within days of each other which left Cordell alone in the camper, anxiously awaiting the cold winter weather.
With a coordinated effort between Elise Kellogg, AMOREM medical social worker, Graham Doege,
With the dedication and persistence of Doege, Kellogg, Tugman and Dobbins, Cordell was able to climb his way to the top of the 200-person waitlist. He was placed in an apartment in the High Country that, unlike the camper, boasted warm running water, a full-sized bed, a full kitchen and a living area with enough space for Cordell and Kellogg to play guitar together while others danced and tapped their feet to the rhythm of Johnny Cash. The home was fully furnished for Cordell with items thrifted and purchased by generous individuals.
As Kellogg fishes around for her guitar pick, Cordell expresses immense gratitude for Dobbins, Tugman, Doege, Kellogg and every other individual who has shown a willingness to help him during his journey.
“Look around this place!”, Cordell says as he extends an arm outward, “What more could anyone possibly ask for? This place has everything that I could have ever asked for and so much more.”
With a wink in his eye, Cordell leans to Kellogg and says, “Well, let’s play us some music!”
To hear Cordell and Willard play Johnny Cash songs in his new apartment, visit the AMOREM YouTube Channel at https://youtube.com/@amorem_bhpc_chpc.
To learn more about AMOREM services, visit www.amoremsupport.org or call 828.754.0101.
OUR APOLOGIES TO PAULA PERRY, FORMER OWNER OF GUARDIAN INSURANCE; AS OUR PREVIOUS EDITION WAS CROPPED INCORRECTLY FROM LEFT-TO-RIGHT: BLAKE GREENE; KAILEY, KELLY, DANIELLE, & KARLIE PERRY
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