JOYRIDE ZINE

Page 1

joyride zine

edited by Leo Torre summer 2022

There is a lot more JOYRIDE to discover online. Some of the next pages will have QR codes on them, directing you to photo galleries or videos. As an example of such, the QR code below will direct you to joyridezine.com

. You can click the codes or scan them, but the way in which you interact with JOYRIDE is entirely up to you.

JOYRIDE

joyride a multimedia zine about queer experiences regarding space and temporalities is an online audiovisual zine centering queerness in relation to diverse experiences of time and space. These experiences are collected in an attempt to battle the stereotypical and monolithic discussions of queer lives, creating a space for an extense spectrum of lived circumstances that share similarities and relate to each other while remaining individual and personal.

Familiarising the Strangeness of Difference and Extending Outwards: An exploration of queer and heteronormative spaces in relation to the possibility of queer happiness. by Eli Court

“If orientation is about making the strange familiar through the ex tension of bodies into space, then disorientation occurs when that extension fails. Or we could say that some spaces extend certain bodies and simply do not leave room for others.”

–Sara Ahmed, Queer Phenomenology

Happiness is reliant on space: allowing yourself to take up space, to exist comfortably within the space you occupy, to be content in your space. To be happy, you must grant yourself this comfortable space, a particularly necessary assertion in relation to queer happi ness. Queer, in this context, is defined as a deviation from norma tive models of gender and sexuality; in a sense, queer is ‘strange’ in its marginality, through difference from the majority. Within heteronormative society, where individuals are presumed to be heterosexual and cisgender, queer individuals are working against the grain, as they are not following the assumed heterosexual path. I use the term ‘straight’ as a signifier for ‘normative’ models of sexuality and gender—primarily heterosexual cisgender—in reference to the straightness and narrowness of heteronormative happiness paths. This heterosexual/cisgender ‘straight’ path is the route individuals are inscribed to tread in order to be happy; a metaphorically spatial trajectory to be followed, primarily consisting of the heterosexu al nuclear family. This assumption creates a tension between queer identity and the assumed path to happiness, and consequently caus es difficulty for queer individuals to comfortably take up space with in a society that restricts them.

However, despite the restrictions of heteronormativity and the re peated attraction of the straight path, queer happiness is proved possible through occupation of comfortable, flexible, and accom modating queer space, including the intimate space of queer bodies. Our difference from the straight majority, from the straight happi ness path, makes happiness difficult because the space we occupy does not correlate to our identities. However, the ‘strangeness’ of queer identities can become familiarity through acceptance: allowing ourselves to both take up space and be comfortable within a space uniquely fitting to each queer individual. Subsequently, de spite our involuntary occupation within heteronormative spaces, we have the capacity to make individual queer spaces familiar through inhabitance, by moving away from the pull of the straight path, and instead reaching towards pockets of comfortable queer spaces in or der to dictate and follow our own path towards happiness. We must extend our queer identities, which are so frequently reduced to less than their worth, outside of our own bodies—allowing ourselves the space to grow and take up comfortable, accommodating space. Through residence within these spaces, we may carve out our own individual happiness path, instead of being constrained by the ill-fit ting straight path; thus, queer happiness is proved to be possible.

Space is no longer a limitation to queer happiness, but instead the answer: we must familiarise the strangeness of our difference, and expand ourselves outwards. (spread in previous pages by ROBIN)

Cola-Closer by Lady Red Ego

It is easy to write about places where god used to be. Even here, under the wings of the big tesco’s, haloed seagulls congregate, crying that their heaven is spiked. It is not just them that has been left behind. And I suspect you find it easier to write about real things now, the gritty everyday and the dirt under your nails. I suspect most angels get on with it, carry their shopping the forty minutes home. Most things don’t hurt for longer. I long for yonder, linger and wonder to this most gracious inconvenience, this very scottish cornucopia, cold foods in plastic skins. To be warm is a luxury. To be raw is a luxury. To choose exactly what I put in my body is lucky. And maybe one day I will come back, to this place where I glimpsed him in the aisle of the soft drinks. The soft drinks said, hold me closely. And god said, it is not only you who is lonely. (art in next page by Will B. Maslen)

by Leo Torre

Golden Tooth by Noah Payne

I know you’d hate me, If you knew. They told me so. You always wore quiet, curtained rage So well. They all laugh now. Black, Burned, Flinching. Your eyes targetedLeavingdestruction.towards,rubble, blitz and coldness on depart. I can understand them clearlyAtnow.22.

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Desire paths are the result of many feet wearing down a new route where none existed before, often occurring where a shorter or easier way to travel was not included. They may cut across corners of dec orative grass in parks, create a shortcut through a fence gap or form a trail through fields and woodlands. These paths reflect and embody queerness so beautifully. They are carved out from the prescribed route through a collective wearing down to create a new way of moving through the world. In this way, they invoke such a sense of community and history. To take a desire path is to follow, literally, in the footsteps of countless generations before us. This multimedia collage expresses my feelings about such paths. The lush, forest filled edges reflective of the natural beauty in deviating from predetermined concepts of love, sex and gender. And a flow of bright, shifting colours like the joy to be found as we take these desire paths together. by Reb Martin (spread in next pages by Chris Timmins)

These photos are from the first Yo Perreo Solx night. To see more and find out about up coming events, visit:

OYE PAPI!!! Yo Perreo Solx is a space for people of marginalised genders. It was created by three Latinx queer folks who want to bring a safe environment for our community to dance, connect, and celebrate the joy of queer Latinx existence, all while raising money to support those doing important work in our communities. The tickets are on a sliding scale so that people of all economic situations can attend.

Lampreda by Lady Red Ego In a mood for finding I slightly shifted. Sea day; limpets resisted. When I first learned of their existence, I pried with all my might. They held on tight. Only wanting to see their soft underbellies (real, after all!) I sifted back onto beach, not sure what I’d expected. All my cruelty was half-hearted. Now. Hole-hearted. In a mood for finding. Only asking for a shell, I go looking for my darling. And come back with a great many. Hole-hearted so, like me, you can string them along your rib. And all day we can listen to your heart-beat. Three. See day; limpets rested. And I no longer need to break you open to know you are always there, watching. In your eyes I find the unmovable understanding that I could love you. Some day. Deeply. If you just shifted. Slightly.

This project is an exploration into all the tiny things that turn a house into a queer home. Heavily inspired by Sara Ahmed’s Queer Phenomenology, Architectural Digest videos in which celebrities showcase their homes and Instagram account @queernightstands, I decided to start documenting the items and decorations my friends own and how these make sense within and outside of their identities. “Loving one’s home is not about being fixed into a place, but rather it is about becoming part of a space where one has expanded one’s body, saturating the space with bodily matter: home as overflowing and flowing over.”

–Sara Ahmed, Queer Phenomenology

Queer Objects Series by Leo Torre

To access the 5 videos made for the series so far:

To

Room to Grow is an editorial concept which draws parallels between the disruptive power of uninhibited queer self-expression, and the ability of nature to adapt and regenerate in urbanised environment. It is informed by Scott Herring’s theory of ‘queer anti-urbanism’, which insists upon the value of LGBTQ+ culture as it exists in rural spaces, and the ability of queer folks to thrive in spaces beyond the cities and towns that our communities are often associated with.

by Amy Iona see more photos from Room to Grow:

by Connie Minerva

Self-Awareness by LS

Yeah yeah you’re serving cunt

You’re cocaine-clean-cut-12Bitch-you’rechoreomaniac-part-time-vegetarian-high-fashion-tuck-in-the-label-foolingeveryoneandno-one.You’vethey-themdthefuckoutofthiseveningssuitwearanddrapedyourselfincelibacytocomplimentyourflat-chest-skinny-frame-disco-shameonyou;Deathtomonogamy!You’refuckingeverything-itseems31-year-old-business-casualwantsyouforyournose-ring-messy-hair-FreeWoooOoRLdVibe.YeahyeahyouliveinapolyculewiththeDisciplesandyou’releadingthewaywithJESUSCHRIST!ItseemsGoddoesloveatrierinaminiskirttonight.

minous breasts and dainty features. Meanwhile, I have broad shoul ders, a big waist, and midsized boobs that I am somewhat apathetic about. When I finished knitting and tried it on I expected to look like the lady on the pattern, but I instead felt the opposite. I thought I looked bulky, even manly. I was disappointed that after all my hard work, the jumper would go to the back of my wardrobe to be rarely seen Aroundagain.six months later - mid pandemic - I started rethinking everything to do with my gender. I’d gotten a haircut - where it al ways starts! - and it reframed how I saw myself. Months later still, I figured out I didn’t identify with womanhood anymore. Had I ever really felt like a woman? I’d always tried to wear more feminine and “flattering” outfits because I was just going along with the script. The script I’d been following my whole life, which tells you that women are feminine, ladylike and graceful. So why had I never felt like that? Fibre arts have always been coded as feminine, but what’s more butch than tak ing raw materials like yarn, and using your hands to cre ate an object from scratch? The first jumper I knitted took me months. It was sage green and the design was influenced by a 1960s pinup silhouette. The model looked elegant and femi nine on the front of the pat tern, with a tiny waist, volu

Moments of gender euphoria are few and far between, so being able to feel so connected to an item I’d made by hand was truly magical. by Catherine

After several more questioning months, I bought a binder and tried the jumper on again with a flat chest. It looked better than it ever had originally. I couldn’t stop taking photos in the mirror and send ing them to my friends. It felt so good to have poured time and love into a garment that not only looked good, but made me feel connected to my body. It was a novelty to look in the mirror and see myself reflected back, rather than a person I felt little connection to.

two sets of self portraits made by Chris Timmins on the left, paper doll below, museum of the colour chris

A miracle is coming It might change your life forever Or the barista pouring your frothed milk Might be wearing the most wonderful shirt. You might discover a new kind of love

TellRegardless,meabout your dreams over coffee Even the death dream. Tell me how you want to go Darling, let yourself enjoy it, But stay alive a little longer, A miracle is coming! I can feel it in my bones, Like when that angel climbed out those ruins And flew away a barn owl Complete change, In a moment. Me or the angel? Does it matter?

Stay Alive by Will B. Maslen

A shirt love, a love too miraculous to name, I am bad at wording this, Please, wake up tomorrow, I’ll try and be there too

Our summer of love has ended. And I still pray for you. Stay alive a little longer and Bear witness to it, To be a witness, To tell me how it was, To see if it can happen again.

I Still Pray by Kathryn Gardyne

After spending our girlhood together

We laugh and scream on the bleachers, with grass-stained knees. As we watch the setting sun You spit cherry pits into my hand. But we are no longer girls And you have a full set of teeth

I fell in love with you as your last baby teeth fell out, Now we share our final summer. Our young faces are shiny with sweat and sun cream

CameronDanbyright

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by Lady Red Ego

On a deep and stormy train up north I realised what it was. And was not quite surprised, when, after hearing branches break up, they told us the whole thing would have to be called off. I think I felt the exact moment he (our driver) gave up. I would have, too. But still it did not change the matter of being stranded, half-city and half-losing. Saying it did not change it. So why did I wish, more than anything, that I’d said it? More than the harbour of Glasgow, more than the warmth of being wanted, more than any other detail. We waited for the screens to stop telling us about our next stop. For automated messages. He (our God) knows how long I waited (if no one else noticed). I should’ve known better than to board in bad weather, but you know how the trainline app is, how hope is, how metal transports heat, how we believe in tracks to take us to places we think we belong. I am no cynic. So when I did not say it, do not think that I gave up just because of a little rain. There are worse things than rain. There are worse things than being stuck in an amber carriage, watching the minutes passing. I mean it kindly when I tell you that it is better to be safe than sorry. Than to arrive in that place where you thought you belonged and find that you are missing something fundamental (a passport) (a phone charger) (a woman) (a woman-shaped thing). Do you know what rejection is? There is a version of me that has always been sitting in that carriage. And when I arrived I recognised myself in the black train window. No one was looking back. No one noticed except me, and mine, and my god, a good god, not woman-shaped but thing-shaped, chanting the very words I came so far to tell you, finally. This train is for Aberdeen. The next stop is Dundee. This train is for Aberdeen. The next stop is Dundee. Mind the gap when leaving.

You Could Have Been Home By Now

The Ship of Theseus, by Leo Torre

by Eli Court

it is

thank you so much to everyone within these pages for making what

JOYRIDE

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