2016 11 tanny 70th b day book by Jessica Tanny

FROM ALL OF US Thoughts for Helene and Stephen Tanny on the occasion of their 70th birthdays

The great thing about getting older is that you don’t lose all the other ages you’ve been. —Madeleine L’Engle

August 18, 2016 Dear Family and Friends, As some of you may know, Helene is turning 70 this October and Stephen will turn 70 in February 2017. We are collecting stories/memories/birthday greetings from Helene and Stephen’s loved ones to make a memory book as a birthday gift. The stories can be any big or small special moments that you have about Helene and/ or Stephen. Robyn and Jessica will collect all the stories (and photos if you have one you would like to include) and Jessica will bind them all in a book. No need to find the perfect story - we’re just looking for quick stories that are meaningful, happy, or just plain nice. Or, if you can’t think of something a birthday greeting would be fine, too. And, of course, you are welcome to contribute more than one story/photo. The more the merrier! Thank you for helping to make Helene and Stephen’s birthday so special! Love, Jessica and Robyn October 11, 2016 Dear Friends and Family, A month ago, Jessica and I sent out a request for stories/photos/memories/greetings for Stephen and Helene’s upcoming 70th birthdays. Our goal is to put together all these contributions together in a book to present to Mom and Dad at Thanksgiving.

Thank you so much to all of you who have already sent something to us! We have loved reading your wonderful stories and happy greetings. If you have not yet sent something, please consider sending a quick story - maybe how you met Mom and Dad or maybe an event that you went to with them (Superbowl parties, neighborhood gatherings, temple functions, Camp Akiba, tennis games, family get-togethers from years ago, weddings, bar/bat mitzvahs, showers, theater trip, PTA functions, school functions, etc.). The more stories/ photos we have, the better the book will be. Love, Jessica and Robyn October 31, 2016 Hello Friends and Family, Jessica is getting ready to put together the book compiling all the wonderful stories and photos that have been sent so far regarding Stephen and Helene. We have loved each story as each one sheds a little light on what makes Stephen and Helene such great people. Before Jessica makes the layout, we wanted to send out a last call for entries. If you can’t think of a specific story/ memory, a birthday greeting would be perfect to let them know you are thinking of them. Don’t hesitate to let me know if you have any questions! Love, Robyn and Jessica

Helene is such a sweet loving friend and always has a hug and smile. One act of kindness that I will always remember is when she gave me a small metal figurine of an angel. My son was just ready to be deployed to Iraq for a year and it was such a thoughtful token of support for me. It is still on my office shelf as my guardian angel. He came home safe and sound. KAREN BEARE

Before we moved to Wilmington we were living in Charlotte and knew the Kamps. Jill told me about her friend Helene and to look her up. We went to their Labor day party and immediately clicked since we both liked antiquing. Later Helene, Jane, Ingrid and I started an antiquing business Circa of Friends that lasted almost 10 years. Helene and I would go over to the auction in South Jersey and were able to get quite a few items for our business to sell. Then it got SO EXPENSIVE we really couldn’t afford to buy anything but continued to go because we liked the club sandwich that we’d split!! Once a foodie always a foodie! Those are some GREAT memories.  TRISH SCHELLMAN Beare, Schellman

“RESETTLERS”

Witham

Resettlers is a funny name

Ingrid came from Holland

It’s what we called ourselves

That beautiful Tulip land

Made up of classy ladies

Her English it was perfect,

No guys, just fabulous girls!

She, we could always understand!

Our common bond was simple

Lynda was the noisy one

We all just loved to shop

With always lots to say

Not for sexy underwear

Getting a word in edgeways

But antiques, we bought a lot!

Was difficult, in every way!

We were an international group

Marie, she came from Scotland

Common interests within the bunch

So spoke with quite a brogue

Shopping, cooking and antiquing

Her clothes, they made a statement

And lots of laughter during lunch.

As did her persona, I suppose!

For a while there was a French girl

Karen is from Canada

Her name was Nathalie

She’s an expert in her field

She referred to Trish as ‘Trash’

Of Staffordshire Bone China

Her English was not perfect you see.

A fine collection her home doth yield.

Then there was Nancy

Ellyn, when we saw her

The smallest of us all

Which wasn’t very often

When placed within our little group

Told stories & made us laugh a lot

Made Helene feel 10 feet tall!

Her NY accent, never really softened.

Trish she is a Southern girl She owns a Scottie hound Recently moved to Charleston Where contentment she has found. Jane, who is the author Of this little rhyme Comes from good old England Which she misses from time to time Helene, for whom I’m writing this Has been a friend to all Now turning 70, still young at heart She hasn’t changed at all! So, Congratulations to you Sincerely from your “Resettlers“ friends We have bonded over many years May these special friendships never end. Cheers! JANE WITHAM Witham

If I had not chosen to attend Boston University (way back in 1964) and your cute, little Mom had not spent her first two college yrs. @ Endicott (Jr.) College, and transfer to B.U. for her Jr & Sr. years, we probably never would have become roommates in the brand new dorms labeled “700 Comm, Ave.” Actually, if I had had a better roommate experience, I would not have needed the college to find me a roommie! As good fortune would have it, Helene & I met in the Fall of ’66. Since we both were Jewish young ladies from New York and studying to be elementary teachers, we had a lot in common. We had mutual friends in our classes and in the dorm. We also enjoyed a nice social life and got along — at least that’s what I remember!!! We got to know each other’s family’s, too, and spent time exploring the great cities of Boston & Cambridge. Helene and I spent the first two months of our Jr. year, traveling in my used old car to Lincoln & Newton, MA to be student teachers in two of the best school systems in the state. If the car would not start, one of us had to call our head classroom teacher for a ride. We both were very dedicated and committed to doing the best job we could do. I think that is why Helene has always been a hard worker and a role model for whatever job she has done be it teaching, cooking, baking, volunteering of her time & energy for the Temples, helping out in her daughters’ schools or caring for her parents and in laws. Not to mention Re-Settlers and running a successful antique business!! Whew — I am exhausted trying to just keep this in perspective. Of course, she has always had the love of her life, Stephen, to support her.

Thibodeau

Helene & I have been good friends for almost 50 years and she has never forgotten my birthday or anniversary!!! I must admit, I remember hers, but I am not as good as she is to send cards & write about her girls, Steve & his work, grandchildren and their travels to Europe or the U. S. A. Over the course of our lives we have visited each other’s homes and families. We have shared weddings and Bas Mitzvahs and spent time with our own children — back where it all started in Boston & Cambridge! I am tearing up writing this for her, as she has just ‘turned’ 70, and I am just a few months ‘older’ ! than her. OMG — where have all those years gone? And why did they go soo fast? I think it must be because we forged the beginning of our lasting relationship when we were only 20 years “young.” It has been my honor to know Helene Ralph & Stephen Tanny and I only wish we lived much closer to them, so we could have seen them much more often. Who knows, maybe we will all retire to the same state, some day in the near future!!!! The Villages here we come?!? Maybe North or South Carolina — near the ocean, would be better... Anyway, Happy Birthdays and Happy 50th. Anniversary you two love birds. All my love for ever & ever. BONNIE LEE BIREN (THIBODEAU)

Helene and I love to go to the Amish auction in Oxford Pa.. We plan and strategize on what we will get and what we will pay and who will do it. One day last year we were both excited about two cases of eggplant. I was happily bidding on it and Helene was beside me. The very nice, astute auctioneer stopped his banter and said ‘Aren’t you ladies together?’ We were bidding against each other. Many happy birthdays Helene!! ELAINE (AND MICHAEL) KIPP

The gift of friendship is one that truly stands the test of time. Originally meeting Stephen and Helene as neighbors developed into a long lasting friendship in the true sense of the word. We have shared many wonderful times together and have consoled and prayed for each other in the difficult times. We are very lucky to have enjoyed this privilege and now share in the joy of their upcoming birthdays and anniversary. We look forward to many more years of laughter, great meals and good wine together. We wish you all the blessings in the world. With much love, XAVI AND MARI DECAIRE

Kipp, DeCaire

Memories For Helene: Growing up, Helene and I had two different sets of sister dresses. The one I adored the most had musical notes on it. The other one had a black velvet top and a white skirt. Then, as we both grew out of the dresses, I wore her dresses as hand-me-downs. I continued to get Helene’s other hand-me-downs until I grew taller. I even got married in Helene’s wedding gown. As a preteen, I decided I wanted to try smoking Mom’s unfiltered cigarettes (I really don’t know why). Helene caught me and tattled to Mom. I was punished and in retribution I decided not to talk to Mom or Helene for a week. With Dad away that week, I made it harder on myself. Helene always looked after me like the time I disobeyed Mom and didn’t put a small electric fan back up in the attic. Instead I put it on my small nightstand. In those days the house wasn’t air conditioned and it was a hot and humid summer night. I had shut off the lights and pushed the fan back a little more on the nightstand. All of a sudden I felt a wetness. I turned on the lights and saw my thumb bleeding. There was a lot of blood splatted across my pink and white bedroom wall paper. I quietly went into our bathroom and tried to stop the bleeding with cold water. My sister came up to go to bed and found me in the bathroom. She got Mom ASAP. I was happy I didn’t get punished. There was a trip to the hospital for a tetanus shot but I was lucky I needed no stitches.

Franklin, Donna

On Friday nights Mom & Dad would go out to dinner then play cards with their friends. On those nights when I wanted to go to bed I had to wait until Helene was ready to go to bed. As she washed up I had to sit on the attic stairs next to the bathroom and wait. With just two of us in the house, she was a little scared. Maybe it had something to do with watching the Twilight Zone TV show at 10:00 that night. Helene’s sweet sixteen party was memorable. Mom had party favors of Disney characters. I got my favorite character, Peter Pan. Helene unintentionally made problems for me in Home Ec classes. She did so well and was so well liked that the bar was set too high for me. For one teacher, I just could not do anything right (or at least as good as Helene did.) In the days before GPS, Helene had a knack of getting lost in our own hometown of Rye. I became her co-pilot and navigator when she first started driving. Helene was always there for me when I had problems with friends at school. She was the one I talked to. She still cares the same way as if we were still schoolgirls growing up at 53 Franklin Avenue. Even now I can call her up anytime, whether she is home or traveling, just to talk. I would not want to have any other kind of sister in my life.

Franklin, Donna

Memories For Stephen: Helene and Stephen were married in August and two months later on Heleneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s birthday he got her a dog, Romeo. Stephen taught the dog tricks like roll over and beg. Stephen did his Doctorate work at Stony Brook University on Long Island. I remember one time I was visiting and we went to the University to watch the original Dracula, not the one with Bela Lugosi. It was really, really creepy. Stephen is man with a lot of patience. He even took me car shopping and I ended up with a Volvo. Memories For Helene and Stephen: When Helene and Stephen first got married, I would drive out to Port Jefferson on Long Island for a weekend visit. I quickly learned that Stephen was a wonderful husband. To me Helene and Stephen seemed like they were one person functioning together. I decided that I want to marry a man like Stephen. After that, no one I dated could compare to him. That is until I met Arthur and I knew we were destined to be together. DONNA FRANKLIN

Franklin, Donna

I will always cherish the time spent in the kitchen with Aunt Helene. Whether we were making scrambled egg casserole after Thanksgiving, or I was helping with the holiday meal. I really appreciate everything that you taught me and knowing that your help in the kitchen is only a phone call away makes me more adventurous in the kitchen. I also appreciate all the doll clothes you made for my American Girl. The one that really stood out was the Hanukkah dress you made. Since at that point in time, the American Girl company did not have anything Hanukkah related, only Christmas, it was super special and one of the dresses I will cherish. Also, I could always count on you to make the dress I wanted from the magazine. I also cherish the time I have spent with Uncle Stephen. Conversations are always so interesting, and I have learned so much from just sitting and listening. Happy 70th Birthday Aunt Helene and Uncle Stephen! SARAH FRANKLIN

Franklin, Sarah

Memories For Stephen: I can’t quite remember when I first met Stephen but I recall being very young. However, I’m sure that as soon as I was able, I looked up to him (literally). Perhaps it is the role of the older brother, maybe it is the natural inclination of the younger brother but I always admired Steve, desired to emulate his behavior, and wanted more than anything else to be close with him. This is why I probably teased him so much, tried my best to infiltrate his friends, and tickle or goad him when my parents weren’t looking. I craved the closeness when wrestling in the back seat of the car on all those long car rides to Portchester and the Bronx, during commercial breaks of our favorite and family TV shows, or when for example he touched poison ivy growing alongside the blue bearded irises on the side of our Adams Avenue house, I went immediately to the same place and gave myself a good dose of poison ivy. Maybe it’s just natural, but Steve was always taking care and looking out for me. There is of course the time that I had been sick with developing pneumonia right before Steve’s bar mitzvah. Although I was burning with considerable fever he didn’t hesitate to chase me down the hallway holding and torturing my favorite teddy bear — or maybe that was the time he chased me with the plastic bowling pin banging me repeatedly on the forearm — both of us laughing hysterically. Crazy as this seems it was just our way of expressing our love to one another as we often had a cat and mouse relationship of teasing and terrorizing – and it was great! Another

Tanny, Mark

exceptional memory is when Steve was hanging out with his best friend Edmund (Adams Ave. time) and he called me over to be with them. Excited to be included I ran up and my brother asked me to point my index finger towards my head. I did so. He then asked me to say my initials. Innocently I did, M T. They laughed hysterically but I didn’t get it. They made me do it again and again, until I did. M T sounds like EMPTY. What a great life lesson! Many years later after studying eastern religion and Zen meditation the profundity of this simple spiritual truth struck me … empty mind, Zen mind! Thanks Steve for laying the foundation so early in my life. Steve, you have always been there for me. Yes, you are the one who taught me that a circle is a polygon with an infinite number of sides. You are the inventor of the Wembly baseball pitch, and could do a great rendition of the ooh wack a doo song so often heard on all the original cat, mouse and Farmer Brown cartoons. There is so much richness of memory; talking before going to sleep together in the back room of our Adams Ave house when I was so little; our collective baseball card collection, sneaking downstairs into the cellar to steal Coca Colas or to scare ourselves getting close to the pine box which housed Dad’s human skeleton from his days in med school. So many little things which when recalled feel like such a big thing: countless times riding our bikes around the Adams Avenue block — or the bigger trips riding our bikes to grandma and grandpa’s house. Playing with

Tanny, Mark

cousins sliding down the stairs at Grandpa Leon’s house or secreting our way into the attic and exploring all the exciting relics we found up there. There was the time we drove across country in your Le Mans Pontiac (?) listening endlessly to our few 9 track tapes, stopping and getting a job at the Boise Big Boy restaurant because you fell for some waitress. (That did not last long Helene.) Then there was the honor of being your “Best Man” at your wedding. We have grown and explored life in different ways but the deep underlying values that Mom and Dad instilled within us remain. Children, love for family, commitment to community, continued life long learning to name only a few. We grew up with certain traditional celebrations of Passover sedars and thanksgiving dinners. Both Alisa and I have appreciated how you and Helene have maintained this tradition. During those times we were available to be with you we have seen your children grow, create lifelong partnership, and gift you with grandchildren. You have found your perfect soul-mate. Helene, you have been a blessing to my brother, an exemplary mother and leader in all your endeavors. I don’t know if I have ever expressed adequately my deepest sincere love and respect for everything you have done for my mother. You have earned the recognition of the matron of the Tanny family! Alisa and I love you both!!! MARK TANNY 20

Tanny, Mark

Dear Helene and Steve, Wishing you the happiest birthdays ever and have the most wonderful anniversary and many, many more. Love you guys, JANET AND DENNIS KIRSCH

About 50 or more years ago, I had a canasta game with Claire Ralph, Naomi Ralph, Audrey Horowitz, Gloria Stern In between games, we had normal conversations. Claire told us her daughter Helene was coming home from college. I said my nephew Steve was also coming home from college. Naomi said we should introduce them so we put our thoughts together to make a “shitach”. It’s now 50 years later and I think it worked!

Happiest of birthdays, Helene and Steve! Quite a milestone! You both deserve the best life has to offer! I think it’s awesome how you both keep this family in your hearts! You are very special people! Happy Anniversary, as well!

Happy birthdays and happy anniversary and many many more. AUNTIE MIMI

AUDREY KURTZ

Hi Cousins, The entire family was very proud that we finally had a doctor in the house. Not a medical doctor like your grandfather aspired to be, but a doctor of chemistry. Leon went to medical school in Edinburgh, Scotland, but WW2 had just started in Europe in 1939 and he did only 1 year. So Steve is the smartest in the family. We were all very proud of him. But Helene came along and proved that she is smarter than Steve. She married someone younger than herself. Happy anniversary to you both and be happy and well. HERB KAHAN Kirsch, Kurtz, Kahan, Herb, and Kahan, Mimi

First thing is first...Happiest of birthdays to my Uncle Steve and Aunt Helene on this very special day. 70 is an amazing thing to be! When Jessica and Robyn reached out to me to send this is truly stuck a chord with me. I know that I haven’t been around a lot, but family means the world, and I thought I could write this to show you that you two have had a great impact on my life with only minimal contact. I don’t have too many memories of coming to see you guys, but the ones I have are certainly great. I remember playing Mario in the basement with the cousins, thanksgiving dinners (by the way amazing food) and playing in the yard. I also remember a couple of boggle games, and realizing that I was so far out of my league in that game against you guys its unreal! I still have never found anyone as good at boggle as my Uncle Steve. Whether or not you realize it, as an adult you two have taught me so much about what it is to work hard, be respectful, understand actions and reactions, and more than anything be fair. In tumultuous times with immediate family, I don’t know if you know this or not, but often Ava and I would talk about what was happening with you. I always believed that whatever decision you two had reached would be

Tanny, Abbas

the correct and fair one. Every example that I saw from you two over the years was of people that could sit down, talk and rationally work out decisions (which at the time seemed almost strange in opposition to my family’s decision making processes) You also taught me a lot about what it is to be a man. It took me a long time to learn in my life, after all I am a late bloomer, but I often look back to experiences at your house as lessons that helped me grow into the adult I am today. Also, you dad never gave you enough credit for being as funny as you are Uncle Steve! The last thanksgiving that I attended at your house with my dad and Alisa was downright hilarious! I wish I had done a better job at staying in touch with you over the years, although its never too late. I was so happy to hear from Jessica and Robyn, and look forward to remaining in contact with all of you. Happiest of birthdays on your 70th, and know that you have had an incredibly positive influence on my life, and I Love and respect the heck outta you both. ABBAS TANNY

I have so many fantastic memories. The more recent ones all involve trips Aunt Helene and Uncle Steve have made to see us — first in GA, and then in OR. But my favorites are probably all connected to Thanksgivings at their house. I remember all piling into the dinning room before they did the extension on the house with us extending into the front sitting room with extra seating. I remember playing Mario in the basement - so cool since we didn’t have computer/ playstation games at home! And I remember sleeping down there too. And then I remember the new addition when it was built and the beautiful Thanksgiving dinner spreads. It’s fun to string the memories together as my perceptions changed and I grew older. I wish we could still come and bring our own kids. But alas... time and money are too slim. Uncle Steve and Aunt Helene have always made it known how much they care about family and about us. We wish them all the best, a hurricane of hugs and an unlimited supply of joy. They are great role models. With lots of love, AVA HOWARD

Howard, Ava

This is a picture of our family at Rosh Hashanah at one of the hotels in the Catskills. Steve and I were in high school (We were all so young). I remember when we lived next door on Adams Avenue and were always playing together, especially kickball. But when the Tannyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s moved to Yorktown Heights, I lost my best friend. I wish Steve and Helene the happiest of birthdays and the most glorious anniversary ever. SHEILA SIMON

Simon

This is where the 4 cousins started—an apartment building in Brooklyn, New York. We had grandmothers like Martha (Cindy and Stacy’s grandmother in the photo) looking over us constantly. The grandmothers sat in chairs outside the building in cold and warm weather, as long as it wasn’t raining they would make sure everyone was safe. They made sure that nobody was fighting and that nobody was doing anything “bad.” If you did something bad, they would report to your parents— grandmothers missed nothing! Helene was first to come, Donna was second–sister to Helene. Cindy was the third, then Stacy–sister to Cindy) was the fourth. Both our families eventually moved out to the suburbs of New York but we lived within ten minutes of each other. We saw each other every Sunday for family dinners. This is how we grew up. Very close in family and proximity. Now that we have moved to separate parts of the country in our later adult years, (Helene and Stephen and Donna and Arthur still on the East Coast), Cindy and Tony as well as Stacy are on the West Coast, we rarely talk, but when we do, there’s a feeling that no time has passed. There is no awkward pause to become familiar again. There is no hesitation. We are immediately still as we were in the photo, 4 kids bonded together that neither time nor distance can pry apart. CINDY AND STACY RALPH

Ralph

I had just delivered jonathan about 2 hours before when my sister called. She was still single and jetting off to (or from) a trip to spain and morocco. She had met some of the other trippers in the airport and got to talking with them. One young woman who was traveling with her mother/aunt (old age is setting in and i can’t remember the exact facts ) and told my sister that she had a sister who had just moved to delaware and was upset because she couldn’t find any jewish friends. When i spoke to her later, i asked for her friend’s sister’s name and, lo and behold, it was your mother. To make it even more of a small world, your family lived on the other side of heritage park from our house on kathlyn court. Two weeks later, after i had called and introduced myself, i plopped joanna in the stroller and jonathan in his gerry carrier, and walked over to meet helene and jessica. We were already members of tbe and i took your mother to a sisterhood meeting. The rest was history and the beginning of more than 42 years of friendship!! Steven also started carpooling to the station with your father in 1975! SUSAN AND STEVEN OGINTZ

Ogintz, Osman

You cannot condense a 40+ year friendship into one paragraph. We have been good friends for so many years; you are family. We have shared so many experiences: Temple Beth El, Camp Akiba, Hockessin Athletic Club, Bridge, Burgers, Brunch Bunch, Mah Jongg and, of course, Holidays. We’ve been attending Erev Yom Kippur dinner at your home for a long time... Something we look forward to every year. Helene, you like to tell the story of how I (Ann) got you involved with TBE Catering. You became its most valuable volunteer for many years. You are a loving, generous, caring couple and we wish you both a very Happy 70th Birthday. Love, ANN AND STEVE OSMAN

Just sending wishes for your 70th birthday. We are fortunate to have you in our life. We have known each other for a very long time but have grown closer as the years go on. How great is that!

I love this quote and it is so very appropriate for you. You are an amazing woman no matter the years.

With wishes for many many more birthdays for you to share with your beloved family and loving friends. Sharon and Stan

SHARON MENASHES

Menashes

Helene and I took the responsibility to make lunch for a meeting the Rabbis and Ministers were having as they met on a regular basis. This time the luncheon meeting was at our temple as it was Rabbi Kaplan’s turn to have the event. So we figured we would have tomatoes stuffed with tuna salad, very nice homemade biscuits we made in our kitchen and of course a wonderful dessert. This was great except we only received 9 RSVP’s and didn’t know that these spiritual leaders were not very good at RSVP’g. So here we were, with our little luncheon prepared and all of a sudden MORE spiritual leaders started coming into the social hall. I believe at that point we had something like 14 or 15 guests for lunch. Well, Helene and I were met with a real challenge. So we immediately held back all lunches and started cutting tomatoes in half (can you imagine the panic we had in the kitchen). I saw a tomato on the floor under the prep table and Helene on her hands and knees crawled under and retrieved the tomato (like manna from heaven). That gave us 2 more servings. Then we proceeded to hunt out another can of tuna and as luck would have it and (by miracle only) we had enough to feed the masses. It wasn’t a huge serving for everyone but we made it happen. It wasn’t funny at the time but a few weeks later at one of the Friday night services Rabbi Kaplan commented in his sermon that this meeting and luncheon had occurred at our temple and how nice it was. I turned around and looked at Helene and Stephen who were a couple rows behind us and we both just smiled at each other. After

Bell

the luncheon, Rabbi Kaplan came into the kitchen and said “I guess there were some miracles going on in here today.” There sure were. My dear friend Helene and I always got a good laugh out of the words “ luncheon for the Rabbis and ministers.” We have had some wonderful times together and Helene I wish you a wonderful 70th birthday. Thank you for all the fun we have had through the years. You have always been that person everyone could count on! LYNDA BELL

Dear Helene and Stephen, A very happy special birthday to you both. Neither of you looks a day over 50! You are the consummate volunteers, especially at Temple Beth El, leaving your mark on so many activities, fundraisers, committees, boards, and just good old fun times. Helene, you have been the life blood of Sisterhood for so many years. Where would catering be without your wonderful recipes, your flair with decorating, and your willingness to step up when you were needed?

May you continue to give, as that is who you are…but more importantly, continue to be in good health and enjoy life to the fullest. You are one of the lucky couples who still shine with love for each other after all these years. That is the most special gift of all. Love and best wishes, ANN AND MIKE HERMAN

You are always there to help with any synagogue event, and you and Stephen have also been generous and willing to help financially when you have seen a need. At first, you, Stephen, just came along for the ride…or maybe just to be with Helene, but you soon became invaluable in your own right, whether it was cutting veggies in the kitchen or setting up the social hall—you were Helene’s right hand man. You also took on many “jobs” of your own, working hard to make TBE the best it could be, and for this you were recognized and appreciated when you received the Man of the Year Award. One of my fondest memories (and Mike’s also) was when you and Mike would quip about who was going to be the last ones out of the temple after a service or event—would it be the Hermans or the Tannys?? Not sure who won, but it was close!

Herman

You requested a story about Helene… Do you want a funny story, a sad story, or not really a story? I have known Helene for probably 35 years. During that time I have worked with her on many Sisterhood and Temple Beth El events. I have attended both of her daughter’s Bat Mitzvahs, as well as Robyn’s wedding. I have enjoyed holiday dinners and attended lots of showers and parties in her home. Helene and Stephen are always warm and wonderful hosts! But what stands out to me is that Helene is the most giving person I have ever met. She will stand for hours sorting clothes for the needy, spend hours in the kitchen baking for a fundraiser, give me hours on the golf course or in after golf conversation. HELENE MAKES THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE BY JUST BEING HELENE….SHE MAKES ME AND EVERYONE AROUND HER BETTER INDIVIDUALS BY JUST BEING IN HER WORLD! I wish my friend a VERY happy 70th birthday… ARLENE (AND HARVEY) ECKELL

Eckell

Koltenuck

It is so much fun to spend time with your parents. Your father has a great sense of humor and is so clever. Your mom is always so helpful and talented and is an incredible “can do” person. We are fortunate to have them as friends. We are always happy to see them. My favorite picture is the one on the far left. This was taken at our DE house — I think it was in the winter of 2014. We invited your parents to come spend the night at our house because a huge snow storm had begun and your Dad was scheduled for heart surgery the next day. We lived within a short (flat) drive to Christiana Hospital and thought your parents would have a better chance to get to the hospital from our house rather than theirs. They agreed and drove over. Your mom brought some meatballs and sauce she had frozen. I had fixings for a salad and I think we both had a box of pasta. We dined royally and then enjoyed an evening playing bridge and Mah Jongg. Your mom and I shoveled out their car the next morning since your Dad couldn’t and Jeff was recovering from foot surgery. Our development had been plowed and they were able to get to the hospital without a problem and your Dad had a successful surgery. ADRIENNE AND JEFF KOLTENUK

Koltenuck

We met Steve and Helene at Temple Beth El. Although we have known them for many years it is only in the last 8 or 9 years that we have become closer friends. I have enjoyed working with your mom on catering and being her stand in for the kitchen at Basketfest. We play bridge and mah jongg together. Jeff has gotten the opportunity to spend more time with Steve playing golf etc. The best thing about Steve and Helene is the compassion and caring they exhibited during my bladder cancer adventures. Their support helped make the period of diagnosis, chemo and surgery so much easier. Talking to Steve helped me know what to expect and also gave me hope. Although we have moved we get to spend quality time together here in The Villages. Happy 70th birthdays and many, many more. ALICE AND JEFF HIRSCH

Hirsch

We first met them about 40 years ago. We became friends by working on the “social committee” at the Temple. We planned fun events only. And plan we did....hay rides, dances, and the infamous Mystery Bus rides. We shared good times, fun times, and some hard times, too. Your mom and I did many crafts together. Jewelry, quilling, fabric flowers and on and on. All raising money for the Temple. I will always remember the day Robyn was born because it’s our anniversary too. We watched our kids grow up, have Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, go off to college and then marry and have families of their own. We have memories that would fill volumes of books. Now, in our 70s, life goes on. We have become kinder to ourselves and really enjoy each day. It is a pleasure to wish your parents,Helene and Steve, a wonderful and Happy Birthday. May this year be filled with new memories made with old friends. Love you two, SONNY & RENEE GERSHMAN

Gershman

WHAT ARE THESE TEMPLE BETH EL MYSTERY BUS RIDES?

The Mystery Bus was just that, a mystery. People paid to go on a bus ride with no idea where they were going. I think we did it for three years. Some of the things we did: yyStopped in Danneman’s parking lot and had pizza delivered by an unknown man. He later turned out to be Jack Gleckner! yyEveryone went bowling in side 17 men’s shoes yyWatched Josh Kalin have a massage yyHad a dance lesson yyWent to Atlantic city yyHad crepes yyWent to Schaefer’s Canal House for dinner yyCrossed the Delaware Memorial Bridge only to turn around and come back again yyGot stopped by armed DE national guards yyTossed pennies in a fountain at a mall

Gershman

Four years ago, after two years playing ‘by ourselves’ in The Villages, on the very last table at a duplicate bridge game, as soon as your parents sat at our table and greeted us warmly …. we just looked across the table at each other - having realized that we had just met people we really liked. Who would have known that at our “advanced age” (they are even older!) we could actually make new and real friends. We are still shocked at how exceptionally fortunate we were that day .... and to think they only play duplicate about twice a year … what luck! The rest is history… our friendship has grown over these last years and has expanded from fun experiences together in the Villages to Helene and Steve enriching our lives as they have introduced us to their delightful circle of Delaware friends who now reside in Florida. Our friendship has also developed beyond the Villages to shared times both in Delaware and up in Boston. We feel so fortunate to have them as part of our lives… to laugh with them, to explore similar interests and celebrate special occasions together. Most of all, their warmth, their sense of humor, and their zest for all that they enjoy makes us happy to be in their lives. Happy 70th birthdays to Helene and Steve. We love you both and look forward to creating many more special memories together! Love, BECCA AND RON COOPER

Cooper

Gross

One of my earlies memories with the Tannyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Delaware when Jessica was just a baby and I loved Heleneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s penny loafers and wore them around the house during our visit. Then there was being followed in the Bellport house by the movie camera. Kim, Pam and myself hid and put our hands over our faces while Jessica and Robyn performed all sorts of songs and dances. Standing in the driveway and banging pots and pans whenever the Tanny family (or I mine, I think) drove away is something I remember, but have no idea how it started. A few months ago my family had a wonderful visit with Helene and Stephen. Mireia and Max had a great time being spoiled as did Xavi and myself. We sent to see the Pennsylvania Amish and Stephen found the first hard pretzel factory as well as a chocolate factory to visit. We were able to spend some quality time together and catch up. It was such a nice way to end our trip to the US. CRIS MELFI

Gross, Melfi

We have only known Stephen and Helene since October 2005, when we first met at their home in Newark. Robyn was dating our son Erik at the time. Many of their friends have more years to capture moments and memories, but this is one of many that we can relate that shows their helpfulness as true friends. Several years after our meeting that first time, and following Robyn and Erik’s wedding, and on one of our visits to Newark, Mary and Helene had time to go to the “Resettlers Antique Shop” in Newport, DE, which we believe is now “The Annex Marketplace”. This was a favorite place to find many antique treasures. Mary noticed and admired a rosewood blanket chest in perfect condition. Later after having returned to Tennessee and thinking about the chest, we decided it was the best piece to use in our redecorated bedroom. Mary contacted the shop by phone, purchased the chest remotely and had it put on hold at the shop. Helene and Stephen graciously offered to pick up the chest and store it at their house. And there it sat, somewhere in the house, waiting for our next visit and opportunity several month’s later, when we retrieved it. We were thankful for their helpfulness and going out of their way so that we could add that blanket chest to our home. Some may think this is a small thing, but sometimes, small things are what bind friendships.

Andersen

And then … there have been our multiple visits for Thanksgiving gatherings, Game Nights, tour of the DuPont Hagley Museum and grounds, enjoying family and friends at their Passover Seder, several visits to Longwood Gardens with some special events and shows, welcoming their visit with us for Christmas with the grandchildren, “arranging for” the Easter bunny to visit the grandchildren at their home, Father’s Day celebrations, tours of Knoxville area, Oak Ridge and Smoky Mountain sights and waiting “patiently” all day for Elliot to be born. And there will be many more events yet to enjoy with Stephen and Helene. CHRIS AND MARY ANDERSEN

Happy 70th birthday! Looking forward to many more years as a family. ERIK ANDERSEN

Helene… Through the Years

Stephen... Through the Years

A 70th birthday is a memorable occasion and cause for both celebration and reflection. We’ve been fortunate to have shared many memories with you over our 40 + years of friendship.

A 70th birthday is always special and provides an opportunity to celebrate life’s best moments. Over our 40 + years as friends we’ve shared many with you and recall them as some of our fondest memories. Our families have shared Camp Akiba, Thanksgivings, Bat Mitzvahs, weddings, and grandchildren. Golf, tennis, and innumerable nights of bridge and Oh Hell, and access to your premium scotch closet enriched our lives and our friendship. Our “big” trips provided many memories. We were “Sensitive New Age Guys” at the Grand Canyon, scotch tasters in Scotland, (remember Culloden and freezing our asses off), jet boat twirling in New Zealand (you making Jill feel nauseous with a finger wave), and restaurant planners for Aruba. We were also photographed at multiple signage at special places and then had victory poses wherever we could reach the top! My job as trip navigator was to always find you (the driver) the most crooked, and dangerous roads possible, but you always rose to the challenge. You were beside yourself on the road to Malinmore, near Donegal , so I considered myself a success! And our St. Valentines Massacre performance over twenty years ranged from mediocre to surprisingly mediocre.

It began on a mystery bus ride with a very pregnant Helene. Something clicked and a lasting friendship was started. Then it was lunches of cottage cheese, salami, olives, and Italian dressing in front of the television watching “Days of our Lives.” Trips to the malls with multiple coupons, which always included hot dogs, sauerkraut, pickles, and fries. Love those bargains! And then came weekends at Camp Akiba and years of Thanksgivings together. Maj Jongg, bridge, beaches, and Bat Mitzvahs were soon followed by colleges and weddings. (Remember filling those test tubes with M +M’s for Robyn?) Then the celebration of grandchildren being born. As “empty nesters,” we’ve travelled together to so many places that it would take a whole page just to enumerate! We are especially grateful for the way our relationship has grown into a very special friendship, with love and support during good and bad times. Even when we are apart, we are still there for each other. May we be able to share and make many more memories and BIRTHDAYS! Happy Birthday Helene! JILL AND MICHAEL KAMPS

Kamps

Through the good and bad times, we have always supported each other. We hope to continue that practice as we plan for new memories in the future. Happy Birthday, Stephen! Here’s looking forward to celebrating many, many more with you.

Kamps

Memories for Helene:

Memories for Stephen:

What can I say, I’ve known Mrs. Tanny my entire life so it’s hard to pick just one memory to describe. When I think of all my time with Mrs. T, the thing that comes most to mind is her generosity — she is the consummate hostess, forever offering her home, cooking, and kindness to others. From Domino Pizza nights when we were kids to hosting years of Thanksgiving dinners, Mrs. Tanny is always willing to give of herself to others. Not to mention, hosting a high-school graduation party, Passover seders, baby showers, and the Varela clan on our summer trip home to Delaware.

What can I say, I’ve known Mr. Tanny my entire life so it’s hard to pick just one memory to describe. When I think of all my time with Mr. T, the thing that comes most to mind is his sense of humor and ability to interject just the right amount of humor into nearly any occasion.

In all of these instances, Mrs. T opened her home to us and others, always, of course, with lots of delicious food and concern for our comfort and well-being. For instance, during our most recent visit with the Tannys in the summer of 2015, Mrs. T went above and beyond expectations by not only hosting our family but by inviting Delaware friends over to visit, essentially throwing a party in our honor. Enrique and I were touched by this generosity. Martin and Marlon also had a blast visiting the Tannys, playing with lots of “new” toys in the basement and learning how to play croquet, and they frequently ask when we can visit again — a testament to Mrs. T’s warmth and kindness. Some pictures from our trip are included to remember this most recent visit. Happy 70th Birthday and thank you for all that you do!!!! JODI KAMPS AND VARELA FAMILY

Kamps-Varela

Over the years, I’ve had the chance to be at the Tanny’s home for a number of different reasons (see description for Mrs. T — Thanksgiving, seders, graduation, baby showers). I have a distinct memory of Mr. T sitting at the head of the dining room table with a yamulke (I’m assuming this was a Passover seder rather than Thanksgiving ) and lots of serious conversation occurring. However, Mr. T inserted a joke or remark that brought levity to the occasion — no small talent. Sadly, I cannot remember the exact thing he said at that moment, but the memory I describe is not an isolated one — I have memories of Thanksgiving and other festivities where the same thing occurred – it seems that Mr. T always has a witty comment that adds to the ambiance of the moment and my family and I appreciate his ability to be funny without being hurtful towards others. Happy 70th Birthday and thanks for all the years of laughter!!!!

Kamps-Verela

Dear M&D On the occasion of your 70th birthdays, I wanted to add something to this book that could tell you how much our family means to me. I know there are a million and one ways to say it, but I find it’s hard to sum up everything I feel. What is it like to be part of the Tanny family? Well... it feels something like this: Years ago the four of us were driving home from dinner with Grandma Bea. It was raining that night and the windshield wipers were making a rhythmic, comforting sound that reverberated throughout the car. In the backseat Robyn and I were trying to one-up each other playing our movie quote game, but we kept dissolving into giggles. Mom turned around from the front seat to look at us with one of her incredulous smiles. “You girls,” she said. And Dad was smiling from the drivers seat. The car was warm, our bellies were full, and we were traveling together towards home. That’s the moment I think of when I try and conjure up what being part of the Tanny family means to me. Happy 70th birthdays, M&D. And thank you helping to shape my life. JESSICA

Tanny, Jessica

Dear Stephen and Helene – You have been family to me for more than 15 years now — hard to believe! I have so many fond memories of not only you, but also of your parents — of Grandma Ralph at the first Thanksgiving I spent at your house, of Grandpa Ralph playfully challenging me with a bit of historical trivia, of Grandma Bea tipping over on to me in the back seat as Stephen took a sharp turn. “Stephen, I can’t get up” she said. Stephen said, “You stay down!” and then we were all laughing. From our first meeting when you came to see Jessica and me in Astoria to our latest visit in Cambridge, life with the Tannys has been full of good times and memorable events — delicious shared meals, day trips in New England, biking at Hilton Head and visiting Savannah, touring New Orleans at Jodi and Enrique’s wedding, and of course many wonderful Thanksgivings. These in particular have always been very special to me, and especially meaningful those times I wasn’t able to get to California to visit my parents.

book for you and he wanted to make sure I included a Happy Birthday from him, and let you know that he thinks of you and includes you in his prayers. I also want to say that as I looked over the photos in this book I was really taken by how wonderful the two of you are as a couple. The joy and love just shine through. I am privileged to have you as part of my family, and so glad I will be there to share Thanksgiving this year. Happy 70th birthday, both of you, and may there be many more happy and joyful years to come. ANTHONY CUELLAR

I just re-read some of our emails that I kept — the oldest was from back in 2002 (!) when Stephen helped me with some tax questions, and I was moved at the way you reached out to my mom when she was sick. You have always been generous, and I will never forget when you helped me financially that time I had to get out to California and the fares were really high. I am sorry we were not able to spend more time as two families coming together, but the afternoon we all shared in Napa remains very special to me, and to my Father. I told him Jessica and Robyn were putting together this Cuellar, Anthony

Dear Mom and Dad, It is difficult to figure out which is exactly the right memories or stories that can express how I feel about both of you. Instead of coming up with the big moments, I compiled what I call “little thoughts” because they are stories or memories or thoughts that are not about the big moments in life - just the little ones that make life extra-special. I love you both and hope you have the very best birthdays! Little thoughts for Mom: Multiple times during any given day, I will be doing some task and I will think about how Mom did all these tasks for me when I was little. Just thinking about her connects me to her in a little way that day. Never a better role model than Helene Tanny! I came home from work to 42G Chicopee and saw Mom sewing with Elliot on her lap. She was helping him sew something. It made him so happy to learn to

do that and it was so great to see her pass on her skills and love of sewing! I loved going to craft fairs with Mom and sitting with her at her table. And maybe buying something, too! There is nothing like a trip to the Christiana Mall, the King of Prussia Mall, or Lancaster to bring back a ton of memories. Remember the days when we could only get Cinnabon at King of Prussia Mall? I also have lots of memories of Mom teaching me how to do percentages by talking about sale items. Or I remember going to Off 5th in Lancaster and playing the “How much do you think this originally cost?” game. Although we don’t get to shop together very often, I love when the Tanny girls can still get together and find the best deals we can! I loved going with you to the garden shop every year to pick out some plants for my little plot in the front of the house - I remember that I loved petunias (still do!) and that I learned about dianthus and celosia from putting together those garden plots. I remember you playing “Olaf” with Emmaline in Knoxville when she got a large Olaf doll for Christmas. She thought that was just the best!

Tanny, Robyn

You were such a great birthday party planner! There are many great parties to choose from, but perhaps one of the best was PartyIn-A-Box, which you sent to me at Brown for my first birthday away from home. That package really made my birthday so very special and was a great way to celebrate with new friends.

Bruce Munro at Longwood Gardens. You were quite sick that day, but you really, really wanted to share the experience with Elliot. That night was quite magical. I remember how fun it was to share the kids’ first baseball game at the Blue Rocks stadium with you and Mom. Elliot was so entranced that it took him 2.5 hours just to eat three chicken fingers and fries!

Little thoughts for Dad: Whenever I read a good book, I like to share with you or see if you have read it. Whenever I get a chance to do a crossword puzzle, I try to channel all of my Stephen Tanny-ness! And I feel really good if I can get an entire puzzle done. I loved when you and Elliot came up with “marble horse racing” when you were visiting us. He had so much fun playing with you! I will always remember the night you took me and Elliot to see the light installation by

You once asked me the best way to measure the strength or force of protein bonds for something you were doing at work. I was thinking of atomic force microscopy. You Tanny, Robyn

said you were thinking about melting a piece of cheese between two layers of plastic and measuring the force it took to separate the layers of plastic. Different strokes for different folks! I love how the kids have picked up some of your funny phrases. They think it’s hilarious whenever they say “Hookum Tookum!”. And, sometimes after a good meal, I am known to say “As Grandpa Steve would say - that was a tasty snack.” You used to pick up Muffin, sort of toss her down the hallway, and yell “Bowling for puppies!”? That always makes me laugh. I remember driving on 141 N and passing Alapocas Rd and you called it “Hocus Pocus Rd”. I said “What about Out of Focus Rd?” and you thought that was pretty good. It made me feel good to know that I came up with a joke that my Dad thought was good. I’m so glad Elliot has one member of our family with whom he can talk about sports! Thank you for helping me with many school projects over the years - from making a xylophone, to doing string art, to helping me with calculus, to helping me learn about polymers for Science Olympics, to reading essays/reports, to hitting the books to find out that you can’t make a picrate from ethyl benzene! You’ve always

Tanny, Robyn

been there to teach and help me understand how to think and organize. Little Memories/thoughts for Mom and Dad: I still love the day you guys arrived in Evanston before the kids got out of school so you came by the lab to help. I love Take-YourParents-to-Work Day! I also remember how Dad came with me to the Bell Lab one Saturday morning when you guys were visiting Boston. I really enjoyed sharing that with Dad. During my sophomore year at Brown, I had organic chemistry lab on Saturday mornings. I was bummed that this would interrupt our time together during Parents Weekend. But, I also remember how happy I was when we left campus after lab and we went down to Newport and spent a lovely day touring some lovely houses. I have lots of good memories of making early

morning drives to Westchester NY whether it was for Thanksgiving (when we would pile in the car with our pillows and in our PJs because it was so early) or Christmas (and we would listen to the top Christmas Song countdown on Oldies 101). Dancing with both of you to â&#x20AC;&#x153;Old Time Rock n Rollâ&#x20AC;? at my wedding was by far one of the best moments ever! One of the best parts about being a part of a family is all the stories that you tell again and again because they are funny and they define your family. Like most families, we have lots of those and I love each and every time we recount them. It makes me feel happy to know that I am part of such a wonderful, laughter-filled family! Love, ROBYN

Tanny, Robyn

COLOPHON This commemorative book was conceived and organized by Jessica and Robyn Tanny and written by all of Helene and Stephen’s family and friends. Editing was done in only a few minor places for misspellings and consistency. The content of each entry is uncut. The book was designed, printed, and bound by Jessica Tanny and PDFs will be distributed to all contributors after the hand-bound version is presented to Helene and Stephen during Thanksgiving 2016. Robyn wrote an entry that was a mini-book in itself and had to be edited for space reasons. We’re saving her unedited version for another day. Jessica put her heart and soul into making the amazing number of entries and photos we received somehow fit together and figured out a way to print and bind it all. Working on this project has reminded both Robyn and Jessica about how great our parents are and how much we respect and love everyone in the Tanny’s greater family. A special thank you to all who contributed. It was a honor to work with your stories about our parents. We leave you with the immortal words of Groucho Marx: Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.