1 minute read
DON'T PUSH THE PANIC BUTTON
When John Chiocchi’s adult son was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (BPD), John had no idea how to help.
I’d never heard of BPD. I thought ‘it can’t just be me that needs help’, so I started to find out.”
John became a service user and carer volunteer. He’s spoken at Board of Director meetings and helped develop a Personality Disorder Hub in Cheshire.
John always felt valued and listened to – but his unique perspective made him realise training missed a key component – carers needed to learn about themselves to improve relationships with their loved one.
He now works with clinicians and carers to offer a 20 week clinically approved psychoeducational programme.
He explains: “Carers can be fabulous at fixing things. We suffocate the person, assuming we know what they need, which can leave them feeling their views are invalid, which causes more friction.
Carer and course leader John Chiocchi
“The course trains carers not to push the panic button and to recognise they could be a trigger for them, and to accept that having bad times is part of normal life.
“My son dreaded Christmas. He’d begin worrying in October and we’d tell him not to. We finally established it was because he feared he wouldn’t have enough money for presents and didn’t want to let anyone down. We created a Secret Santa and he doesn’t worry any more.”
John is especially keen to support young carers. “A lad whose mum had psychosis asked if he could join the session. At the end he thanked me and said he wouldn’t be scared next time his mum started talking to people who weren’t there.”
We’ve had service users who say “thank you, my family finally understands who I am.”
Moving courses to Zoom during the pandemic has reduced waiting lists and carers find it easier to study from home.
John says feedback is good.“Most say they wish they’d done the course years ago.”
TO FIND OUT MORE about the Training, Education and Support (TES) course contact: john.chiocchi@merseycare.nhs.uk
NEED SUPPORT?
Help yourself – our self help guide on anxiety can be read online, downloaded or watched as a video. merseycare.nhs.uk
