WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CHANGE?

THE HABIT TRAP

There’s a lot of talk about habits out there with a prevalent belief that if you can master your habits you can reach your goals. Habits have been running the show since we were old enough to make them. The time has come to shift our reliance on habits, both good and bad, and develop routines and rituals instead. Because habits become automatic and operate unconsciously, we don’t even realize we are doing them. Building routines and rituals take conscious effort, giving you more control over your behaviors and allowing you to create a system that makes difficult things easier and sometimes, surprisingly, fun to accomplish.

Habits make you run on autopilot. WAY is here to put you in the driver’s seat.

A BETTER BLUEPRINT

This book provides you with a blueprint for turning old habits into new routines that lead to big breakthroughs. WAY is here to give you the practical, strategic guidance and tactical advice you need to get the outcome you desire. Whether it’s a healthier body, glowing skin or just some more sleep, we are here to guide and support you every step of the way.

We know none of this is easy. That’s why we will show you how to build a plan and implement a system of continuous small improvements that will give you the freedom from worrying about how you will make the changes you know you must make. Our aim is to relieve this burden of how and get you those big wins that will make you feel like a million bucks.

Let’s dive in.

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CHANGE?

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THE MYTH OF CONTINUOUS MOTIVATION

How many of you can relate to this scenario? You visit a super high-achiever friend or the New Year comes around and you decide to revamp your entire life according to your new resolutions. You decide with certainty and conviction (this time) that you will lose fifteen pounds by summer and get that bikini body you’ve wanted for years. You head off to your local grocery store armed with your paleo-friendly, gluten-free food list and you throw down $1,000+ for a fancy sure-to-work gym membership. You spend another $500 at Lululemon getting the perfect workout clothes. You might even shell out money to buy that expensive Peloton all your friends have been raving about. For the first two days you are spot on with your new healthy eating habits. Your Peloton routine has you inspired and your first three trips to the gym leave you sweaty and feeling like you can take on the world. You think, “I’ve got this. I’m on FIRE this time!”

Three days later you wake up with that familiar low back pain and that fire seems to be missing in action. You sit in bed 5-10-15 minutes longer just waiting for your mind to motivate you to jump on that Peloton. It never does.

7 Then, your mother-in-law calls to say she’s coming into town this weekend and your 5-year-old has the beginning of yet another flu. And somehow, with the missing motivation combined with all the interruptions and drama, your new health kick’s gotten completely derailed. Now, food prepping your week of salmon and veggie dinners isn’t so enticing, and it’s just easier to order in. The Peloton is collecting dust in the corner and is functioning more as a clothes hanger. And the gym? Well, it’s really just too far out of the way now isn’t it ;) Where did all your “motivation” go?

“Forget motivation. It’s a myth. I don’t know when we all bought into the idea that in order to change you must ‘feel’ eager or ‘feel’ motivated to act. It’s complete garbage.” —Mel Robbins

THE GRIT GAP

In these moments of no motivation, this is where it gets gritty. And this, we believe, is the sweet spot. This is where the opportunity for a major shift lies. In this time of discomfort with no inner urge to make things happen. In the challenge. In the moment where the decision to make a better choice lies. We call this The Grit Gap.

What it boils down to is choice making. The choices you make will not come from a place of wanting. Let’s be honest, no one really wants to eat broccoli and kale every day, but we think we are supposed to want to. Therein lies the rub. The misconception, the myth of motivation.

“Motivation is a myth. It’s just like orgasms, it comes and goes.” —Lokopoko

What we do want is to feel better. What we do want is to be the type of person who eats healthy. What we do want is the freedom to make good choices that will benefit us in the long run. But motivation is a myth. And if we wait around for it to miraculously emerge, we will stay stagnant, complacent and in exactly the same state while we secretly long to improve ourselves.

THE IMPORTANCE OF DELAYED GRATIFICATION

As children we wanted everything when we wanted it. Now! As we grow and learn about the world, we understand that long-term payoffs can far outweigh short term gains. You’re always going to want to eat pizza. That’s never going to go away. And to fool yourself into thinking you don’t is just a waste of time.

It’s time to shift your mindset. Accept that you will want to sleep in. Accept that you will want that slice of cake. That’s ok. What we must work on is being uncomfortable with not having those things all the time. We may need to find worthy substitutes to make the changes we desire.

BUT I DESERVE THE CAKE!

Often we get caught in feeling like we’ve earned the right to eat that “symbolic” cake. We say to ourselves, “I worked hard all week. I drank eight glasses of water today and I ran an extra mile. I deserve to let myself have that damn cake.” This is the moment. The moment when you have a choice. You can decide to eat the cake now and get immediate satisfaction, but we all know that it’s just a matter of minutes before we start to tell ourselves that we shouldn’t have. Then we proceed to beat ourselves up over indulging in a single piece of cake and we don’t even get to enjoy it. It simply never ends.

What’s more important than immediate satisfaction is delayed gratification. The end game far outweighs the 5 minutes of pleasure that comes from eating a piece of cake. The end game of knowing “I’m the type of person that makes healthy choices of what I put in my body” far surpasses that quick fix of sugar. To get where you need to go requires shifting your mindset, playing the end game, and building a better system to get you there.