Just Jordan Nov 17

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JUST Jordan

Wed 1 Nov IN THIS ISSUE

Introduction Hello everyone and welcome to my November edition of “Just Jordan”.

I’ve chosen a Fireworks theme for my cover photo and have written an article on sensory friendly ways to enjoy this time of year.

Again am elated with the response about my “JUST Jordan” group & huge thanks to everyone who has bought a copy of the newsletter!

If you’d like to order a paper or hardback edition just drop me a line and I’ll order it for you. I’ve continued with a similar layout but please do share any suggestions for next month’s! As always please do keep your

feedback and messages coming, it’s a pleasure hearing from each and everyone of you!

I’ve worked very hard on this Newsletter and I hope that you will enjoy and tell all your friends & family about “JUST Jordan”.

You will find information on my “JUST Jordan” Facebook/Twitter page and how to contact me details are also enclosed.

As alway’s I look forward to your feedback, submissions and questions for The Christmas edition.

Wishing you all a Happy & Safe Fireworks/Bonfire Night!

See ya,

Jordan Fernando xx

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My Top 10 Tips on

Art Corner Communication

“ “JUST Jordan” Poet – Kerry McGinn

Kids Zone

……and much more!

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My Top 10 Tips on How to Communicate with us Aspies.

All too often I've experienced many of these points highlighted below and feel the need to share what they are and how they can make us feel.

1. Keep in mind that communication difficulties are pretty common with us Aspies. We have difficulties in reading social cues and body language so be patient and understanding.

2. We tend to take things literally and have often trouble reading between the lines. As a result, we may ask a lot of questions to clarify what is meant by something that you say. I have been told that I ask a lot of questions.

Don’t be offended by this. It is our way of being sure that we understand what you are telling us. We may repeat back to you in our own words to try and get on the same page as you.

3. If we misunderstand something that you say, please be patient and expand on what you said and explain what you meant. Don’t assume a negative or hostile intent from us if we misunderstand something that you said. Keep in mind that communication can be difficult for us. Things that come naturally to you take extra effort by us.

4. Please don’t get offended by our communication style. We tend to be frank, honest and matter of fact. Some people may interpret this as blunt or rude. We don’t intend to offend you by not sugar coating the things that we say. We don’t intend to be rude. Please don’t get defensive or assume that we are attacking you. Remember that communicating is hard for us. Don’t make negative assumptions. Too often we get corrected or attacked by someone who fails to give us some slack and the benefit of the doubt.

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5. Please don’t expect eye contact. We may be able to force eye contact, but it is not comfortable for us. Making eye contact takes a conscious effort. This effort may take away from listening and understanding what you are saying. I tend to look at a person’s mouth more often than their eyes.

Other autistic people will rarely look at your face. This is ok.

6. Please keep in mind that we most likely have been rejected, excluded, ridiculed or bullied in the past. If we seem anxious or insecure this may be due to living in a world that misunderstands us and is often hostile to us. We have to work hard to reach out to others. Please work at reaching back to us with understanding and kindness. If we feel that you are ignoring us we will feel bad about that.

We may persist in asking for feedback from you. Please be reassuring and clearly express your support for us.

7. Please don’t speak down to us. Treat us as equals. We may sound flat or have an unusual tone to our voice. We may not speak with our voice at all. We may need to type our words. Please be patient with us. It may take us a while to formulate our answers.

8. Please don’t talk too loudly or yell at us. It is very jarring to us. It makes me jump when someone comes up to me and talks too loudly. It is like having someone jump out in the dark yelling “BOO!” at me. I don’t like this.

9. Please do NOT touch us without warning. It will make us jump. We don’t like unexpected touches.

10. Please don’t assume that we lack empathy or emotion. We pick up on negative or judgmental attitudes. We know when people look down on us or are hostile to us. We will shut down if you show us a lack of respect.

Please keep in mind that we are all different. These issues will vary from person to person. The above tips are written from my perspective as an autistic person. This is just a guide. Feel free to ask me any questions so that I may expand and clarify any areas that aren’t clear to you.

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Sensory Friendly Events

My family now loves watching the fireworks and bonfires however that wasn't always the case for me. When I was younger I was petrified of the loud bangs and flashes. The noise and hubbub can produce sensory overload for anyone on the spectrum.

I was introduced to them gradually, sometimes Mum would sit down with me when I was nice and relaxed and just have fireworks on in the background on the telly with the sound turned down. I got used to that and started enjoying watching them, then gradually she'd turn the volume up a tiny bit at a time until I was ok with it. As time went by we'd start off small in the back garden with little sparklers and child friendly fireworks which I loved. As I got older I felt able to go along to an organised firework display with headphones (noise reducers) intact and I was fine. I suggest thinking about what size of firework/bonfire display is right for your family. It could be sparklers in your garden like me or maybe it’s going to town for full-out fireworks.

Everyone is different.

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The main thing before any event though is to think about how your going to prepare your child in advance. Talk about what’s going to happen at the event. You can show them an Internet video of fireworks – perhaps playing it quietly first, then slowly turning up the volume like my Mum did with me. If your child responds to visual aids, you can create a story about the day with pictures or photos. Explain that there will be lots of people. Focus on the fun! Tell your child why you enjoy fireworks and let them see that you’re excited to attend. This will help them get excited too. Describe the activities you know they’ll enjoy, whether it’s seeing a friend or the ice cream cone they’ll get as a treat. Bring along favorite items such as toys, games and snacks.

This can provide a crucial distraction if your child gets antsy while waiting for the activities to start. I remember having a blanket, towel or chair as creating a defined space that was just for me really did help and ultimately made me feel more comfortable in a crowd, now that I think of it…yep we still do those things now. Consider bringing headphones like I did to help block out excessive noise. As we all know, fireworks can pack a lot of sensory stimulation! Also consider sitting some distance from the display – someplace you can still see the colorful explosions, but without the intense noise. I still do this and it makes a big difference. I recently went to a festival with my best friend and we stood near the back, we had more room and still had a great view. I just can’t get my head around these so called ‘mosh pits’, that would just be a nightmare for me, but hey ho each to there own I suppose. Anyway, make sure your child knows how to ask for a break from the crowd or noise.

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If your child is verbal, he/she may only need a reminder. However, many children on the spectrum do best with a visual aid. For example, provide your child with a special card to hand to you when they need a break from the stimulation and last but by no means least always make sure safety is a priority!

Do send me your fireworks/bonfire pics and and I’ll try my best to feature them in next month’s edition!!

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Remembrance Day As many of you know my Mum served in the Military Police and it has been our tradition every year to remember those who served in the armed forces and who lost their lives in the line of duty.

Along with a few members of the Legion Irvine, Mum is featured in this amazing photo created by Kevin @ KSG Photography.

https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=291501440860847

Most of us are familiar with the date and seeing people wearing poppies but do you all know exactly what Remembrance Day is and why we commemorate it every year. Growing up all I knew was that we wore a poppy and mum took part in a parade as a veteran, but reading all about it just made me so thankful to every single person who has served in the military and am so proud of my Mum. Remembrance Day (sometimes known informally as Poppy Day) is a memorial day observed in Commonwealth of Nations member states since the end of the First World War to remember

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the members of their armed forces who have died in the line of duty. Following a tradition inaugurated by King George V in 1919, the day is also marked by war remembrances in many non-Commonwealth countries. Remembrance Day is observed on 11 November in most countries to recall the end of hostilities of World War I on that date in 1918. Hostilities formally ended "at the 11th hour of the 11th day of the 11th month", in accordance with the armistice signed by representatives of Germany and the Entente between 5:12 and 5:20 that morning. ("At the 11th hour" refers to the passing of the 11th hour, or 11:00 am.) The First World War officially ended with the signing of the Treaty of Versailles on 28 June 1919.

The memorial evolved out of Armistice Day, which continues to be marked on the same date.

The initial Armistice Day was observed at Buckingham Palace, commencing with King George V hosting a "Banquet in Honour of the President of the French Republic" during the evening hours of 10 November 1919. The first official Armistice Day was subsequently held on the grounds of Buckingham Palace the following morning.

The red remembrance poppy has become a familiar emblem of Remembrance Day due to the poem "In Flanders Fields" written by Canadian physician Lieutenant-Colonel John McCrae. After reading the poem, Moina Michael, a professor at the University of Georgia, wrote the poem, "We Shall Remember," and swore to wear a red poppy on the anniversary. The custom spread to Europe and the countries of the British Empire and Commonwealth within three years. Madame Anne E. Guerin tirelessly promoted the practice in Europe and the British Empire. In the UK Major George Howson fostered the cause with the support of General Haig. Poppies were worn for the first time at the 1921 anniversary ceremony. At first real poppies were worn. These poppies bloomed across some of the worst battlefields of Flanders in World War I, their brilliant red colour became a symbol for the blood spilled in the war.

Photo opposite is my Mum and our dearest friend Mathew Wilson at the cenotaph in Dalmellington.

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In the United Kingdom, the main observance is on the Sunday nearest to 11 November, Remembrance Sunday with two minutes of silence observed on 11 November itself, a custom which had lapsed before a campaign for its revival began in the 1990s. Ceremonies are held at local war memorials, usually organised by local branches of the Royal British Legion, an association for ex-servicemen. Typically, poppy wreaths are laid by representatives of the Crown, the armed forces, and local civic leaders, as well as by local organisations including exservicemen organisations, cadet forces, the Scouts, Guides, Boys' Brigade, St John Ambulance and the Salvation Army. The start and end of the silence is often also marked by the firing of an artillery piece. A minute's or two minutes' silence is also frequently incorporated into church services. Further wreath-laying ceremonies are observed at most war memorials across the UK at 11 am on 11 November, led by the Royal British Legion. The beginning and end of the two minutes' silence is often marked in large towns and cities by the firing of ceremonial cannon and many employers and businesses invite their staff and customers to observe the two minutes' silence at 11:00 am.

Every year we plant our own poppy cross in the garden as a mark of respect for our fallen comrades and I truly believe we should all ‘remember them’ and continue to pass it on from one generation to the next.

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Kids Zone

by Jordan Fernando

More in the Kids Zone next month!

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Art Corner We have a wonderful drawing this month submitted by Lucy Watson from Saltcoats.

Lucy drew it as it's an easy and fun pic to draw and would love to visit Disneyland one day. “JUST Jordan” loves your art and hopes you get to meet Minnie in person one day!

Please do keep your drawings coming and I’ll do my best to feature them in next months edition of JUST Jordan.

Jfernando_1997@hotmail.co.uk or suzfernando@yahoo.co.uk https://www.facebook.com/groups/213071952427706/ @JustJordan2016

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Our regular JUST Jordan poem submitted by Autist Kerry McGinn 20, Stevenston, North Ayrshire.

Bonfire Night Fireworks are beautiful, aren’t they?

As they shoot across the sky, so dark Watching them snap, whizz Crackle and spark But they can also be dangerous too So, to make sure the occasion’s not a fright Here are some classic but important rules To help you have a sparkly and safe bonfire night For any kids reading, if you’re holding sparklers Dunk them in water before they reach the bottom or you’ll get burnt And if your parents light up rockets, please stand well back ‘Because we don’t want you getting hurt If you have any pets at home Please keep them at bay Because if you don’t keep them in the house They’ll get scared and run away So as long as you follow these rules Then you will be alright And you’ll have a great time watching the fireworks As they make the sky so bright

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Review Time Look out for special reviews next month right here in “JUST Jordan”.

Pet Fostering Services Scotland

By Jordan Fernando We all know the sheer joy our pets can bring us but more importantly they seem to have a knack for calming us down during meltdowns or is that just mine. I had a real fear of most animals as a youngster especially 'cats', I'd literally freeze on the spot if I saw one. My parents made the decision to get us a puppy who we named Bruno as my Mums parents done the same for her as a child and it helped her overcome her fears. In the space of a few hours I was in love with this little guy hook line and sinker! I can't recommend enough the benefits of having a pet, Bruno gave me so much more confidence and even though it took many years for my phobia of cats to ease a bit, I was definately less fearful around animals.

We now have 2 dogs, 2 gerbils, 2 mice and 2 rabbits….when Bruno was around 3 we decided to rescue a dog from the local shelter, he was a beautiful black lab whom we named Angus and they get on brilliantly together.

Since visiting the rescue centres it really brought home how important it is when deciding to get a pet, going and visiting these places first is a must, there

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are so many unwanted/abandoned animals in rescue shelters nowadays to the point of overcrowding, it is truly heartbreaking. I think it was shortly after rescuing Angus that we decided to help out Pet Fostering Services Scotland.

Pet Fostering Service Scotland provides a short term emergency care service for pet owners who are temporarily unable to care for their pet through accident or illness. For us it's a great way to care for small furries now and then and help out families in need. We only help out with rodents now but they offer help with any animal you have as a pet. We've cared for rabbits, mice and gerbils and we absolutely love helping the charity out whenever we can.

If a pet owner is unable to afford boarding fees or arrange any other care for their pet, then PFSS will try to help. PFSS does not operate a boarding centre or kennels but relies solely on volunteers who welcome the pet into their own home. Foster carers like us have been approved through an assessment process and had a home visit by the team.

In the event of an emergency, a carer* or relative must contact their local PFSS Area Organiser on behalf of the owner, via the national low cost phone number: 0844 811 9909 They do not accept foster requests by email or any other method, only by phone to the central number between 9am and 7pm daily. Just listen to the message and select your area of Scotland.

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*The carer could be a social worker, a nurse, a home help etc.

As I said earlier we love volunteering as pet foster carers but there just isn't enough of us to go round so if your thinking of becoming a volunteer foster carer, then read on and I'll explain a bit more about it.

By fostering…

Foster carers give a temporary home to a pet, taking responsibility for the care, feeding & exercise of the pet……..in short they give a pet a ‘home from home’ and free the owner from worry at a difficult time.

Could you become a PFSS foster carer?

They offer care for all types of pets, from cats & dogs to snakes & hamsters. So if you would like more information or wish to apply, please phone or email the recruitment team for an Information & Application pack.

PFSS rely on volunteers to carry out home visits, to become involved in fundraising and to promote the work of PFSS, either in person or helping our advertising campaign.

If you would like to help in any way please contact the recruitment team on: 0844 811 9909 select 5 then 1 after the Welcome message or just Email: volunteering@pfss.org.uk This is a truly wonderful charity which is operated entirely by volunteers and funded by donations and small grants. http://www.pfss.org.uk/ https://www.facebook.com/petfosteringscotland/ Rating: Can't rate highly enough!! 5/5

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Dear Jordan……

Ask me anything and I’ll be as frank with my views as Coleen is on Loose Women!! I can be your straightesttalking agony aunt, giving advice on relationships, bullying, early diagnosis and any life problems you may have…..xx Huge thanks to everyone who submitted questions for “Dear Jordan”

“Dear Jordan: Is it normal for my son to be obsessed with fireworks?

It is perfectly normal for some people to be interested in particular things. Some people’s interests are a little more intense than others. A person’s interests may differ as they grow older and they are often extremely enjoyable for people. Some people describe it as an escape from the everyday stressors of life. An interest only starts to become an obsession if it interrupts everyday life and interferes with opportunities that are available to someone. People may become more obsessed about a particular topic or interest if they feel that they need a level of control and predictably in their lives.

Hope this helps ! Love Jordan xxx

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“Dear Jordan”: What are your views on these new fidget toys. Are they safe?

People have lots of different views on fidget spinners and I know that they must be extremely distracting in classrooms for example.

What I would say is that every behaviour has a function and it is up to us to understand the function of the behaviour before reacting to it and this includes using a fidget spinner.

You can read a little more about behaviour on the link below http://www.autism.org.uk/about/behaviour/guidelines.aspx Hope this helps ! Love Jordan xxx

“Dear Jordan”: Who is more likely to develop autism, boys or girls?

The information that we currently know about autism is that more boys have autism than girls.

But there may be a number of reasons for this. One reason may be that women and girls are very good at masking how they feel and engage with others, therefore not giving a true reflection of that statistical information. It may also be that criteria for autism relates specifically to boys with Aspergers’s Syndrome and therefore we may observations that would ordinarily be done relatively quickly.

Hope this helps ! Love Jordan xxx

“Dear Jordan”: How young can a child be to receive a diagnosis of ASD? Some young people can be diagnosed from the age of 2 years old. It is fairly common however for children to be diagnosed at a later date because they may not present with any other significant challenges.

Hope this helps ! Love Jordan xxx

“Dear Jordan”: Are there different types of ASD? Are some cases of ASD more severe than others?

Autism Spectrum refers to a number of ways that autism impacts on people. People often refer to autism in many ways. Some people say ASD, or autism, or Aspergers or refer to themselves

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as Aspie! People who have autism will normally have a preference as to how they are described, or not !

Autism affects people in three areas, namely, social communication, social interaction and social imagination and flexible thinking. How these impact on someone will vary from person to person, this is why you may think that there are different types of ASD. Some people may also have a learning difficulty and this may mean that they struggle to communicate with people verbally. It is important to be patient and use different means of communication to support a person’s understanding of what you are trying to say. You could use signs, written words, photos or the actual object itself!

Hope this helps ! Love Jordan xxx

POLL: What would you like to read about in “JUST Jordan”?

Let us know by contacting us via email: jfernando_1997@hotmail.co.uk or suzfernando@yahoo.co.uk

HOW TO SUBMIT AN ARTICLE. If you would like to submit an article, picture, ask a question or offer support in next month’s newsletter please contact me via email: jfernando_1997@hotmail.co.uk or suzfernando@yahoo.co.uk

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What’s On in Ayrshire

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https://www.facebook.com/groups/476315025910707/ or https://www.facebook.com/VintageRoseTherapies.co.uk/

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Fireworks Night & Family CarnivalFriday, November 3 at 6 PM - 9 PM Ayr Racecourse https://buymsh.digitickets.co.uk/tickets

Paisley Fireworks Spectacular Saturday, November 4 at 2 PM - 7 PM Paisley Town centre

Autism Carers Group Largs Fri 4th Nov 10-12 Largs Library 26 Allanpark Street, KA30 9AG Largs

Bubbly Afternoon Tea Sunday, November 5 at 1 PM - 4:30 PM Si! Cafe:Bar:Restaurant Enjoy a Bubbly Afternoon Tea in the fabulous newly refurbished surroundings of SI, Irvine. This is a perfect time to relax with family or enjoy a day out with friends whilst raising money for three local charities. Action Against Stalking, Ayrshire Sportsability & Break the Silence.

Shopping | Raffles | Auctions | and more……

Tickets £24 adults / £14 children available from Break the Silence on 01563 559558 or email events@breakthesilence.org.uk

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Glasgow Fireworks Sunday, November 5 at 5 PM - 9 PM Glasgow Green Glasgow's biggest and best free fireworks display returns to Glasgow Green on Sunday 5 November.

From 5pm you can access the site at Glasgow Green and enjoy food and drink stalls and the funfair before the big explosive finale!

Catering & funfair 5pm – 9pm.

Fireworks display 7.30pm

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Glasgow Christmas Lights Switch On Sunday, November 19 at 5 PM - 9 PM George Square, Glasgow, G2 1, United Kingdom The Christmas Lights Switch On event takes place on Sunday 19 November. This much loved festive event is central to the city’s winter time celebrations.

The online ballot for tickets opens on Monday 2 October at 10.00am and closes on Sunday 15 October at 11.59pm. You have 2 weeks in which to apply.

You apply for tickets on the Glasgow Loves Christmas website. www.glasgowloveschristmas.com This is the official page for Glasgow Christmas Lights Switch On and Glasgow Loves Christmas.

Check on our official channels for all updates.

Christmas Lights Switch On Thursday, November 23 at 3:30 PM - 7 PM Main Street, Kilwinning Cojac Centre An adult day service. You need to register to attend. So please contact the Cojac Centre if you are interested. Tel: 01416341002 or email cojac@btconnect.com or contact us on FB or twitter @cojactweets. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100009676956103

“JUST Jordan” Copyright of Miss Jordan Fernando Jfernando_1997@hotmail.co.uk suzfernando@yahoo.co.uk https://www.facebook.com/groups/213071952427706/ @JustJordan2016 https://issuu.com/justjordan19/ Disclaimer: All articles and information in this newsletter are of the writers own personal experiences and opinions.