Jan 17, 2014

Volume xiX, Issue XXIII | thejewishvoice.org Serving Rhode Island and Southeastern Massachusetts

16 Shevat 5774 | January 17, 2014

Weddings

Speaker Gordon Fox visits Alliance’s Parenting Center

R.I. LEGISLATIVE PRESS BUREAU Speaker of the House Gordon Fox talking to the Alliance Director of Jewish Life Michelle Cicchitelli, about the impact of the Alliance Family Room Parenting Center – which was funded in part by State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations House of Representatives Legislative Grant. “We almost take for granted that someone knows how to be a good parent; parents need support,” Fox commented. “I love the way [the Parenting Center] is set up. It replicates a natural living space. It’s nice to see what the money was used for and that it’s making a difference.”

The Rhode Island’s Interfaith Coalition’s annual One Voice Fighting Poverty with Faith vigil on January 8.

Jim Hollander/EPA Ariel Sharon prays at the Western Wall in Jerusalem after being elected prime minister in 2001.

Sharon remembered as ‘friend, leader, military chief’ JERUSALEM (JTA) — Former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon at his public funeral was remembered as a man of courage and strength on the battlefield and in the political arena.

“Sharon was a complex man who lived in complex times in a complex neighborhood,” U.S. Vice President Joe Biden said during the memorial ceremony Monday at the Knesset plaza in Jerusalem.

Sharon, said Biden, “engendered strong opinions. But like all historic leaders, he had a North Star that guided him.

The North Star which he never — in my observation — deviated from. His North Star was the survival of the State of Israel and the Jewish people. ” Biden was among some 1,000 guests who attended the public funeral, including Knesset members, Cabinet ministers, military leaders and 21 delegations from other countries.

Former British Prime Minister Tony Blair, now the ambassador of the Mideast diplomatic Quartet, recalled that Sharon was not comfortable in formal meetings, tending to repeat himself or read from prepared

It’s none of our business

By Rabbi Efrem Goldberg According to the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, approximately 800,000 children younger than 18 are reported missing each year. That means close to 2,200 children a day or 91 children every hour are reported missing in the United States.

And yet, I don’t remember a story catching the attention of the Jewish community in the same way as the report that this past Monday, 16-year-old Caleb Jacoby from Boston was missing.

By the time Caleb was found on Thursday night, the news had spread to Jewish communities across the globe that had been pray-

ing for his safe return. Jewish organizations and synagogues sent out email alerts asking people to look for him. The report of Caleb’s disappearance united incredibly diverse segments of the Jewish community that rarely come together in such a cohesive way.

People from all different ages, backgrounds, denominations and levels of observance shared in the pain of the Jacoby family and expressed it by posting the missing person poster on their Facebook statuses and tweets.

The unusual reaction to the missing Jewish teen was not lost on the Brookline Police Department. The Atlantic reported, “Police

texts. Blair said that when Sharon accepted an invitation to his home for dinner, he saw “a different Arik — warmhearted, humorous and charming, and passionate.”

Blair said that despite agreeing to the road map for peace, evacuating Gaza settlements and forming the centrist Kadima Party, Sharon’s “strategic goal never wavered: [Israel] had to be protected for future generations. When that meant fighting, he fought. When that meant making peace, he sought SHARON | 13

CELEBRATIONS 2014

have told Maimonides [school in Brookline, MA] parents that they’ve never seen this degree of interest in a missing person. They’ve received calls from strangers in Israel who are ready to fly over and carefully comb the streets of Brookline with the Maimonides classmates who are searching for him, houseto-house, in below-freezing weather.”

The fact that Caleb is the son of Jeff Jacoby, a prominent conservative columnist for the Boston Globe, certainly added to the intrigue of the story, but I would like to believe the same attention and efforts would have be BUSINESS | 23

Bar|Bat Mitzvah Expo

at Temple Sinai Sunday, January 26 10 a.m. - 2 p.m.

DJs | Florists | Caterers Event Planners Photographers and more Free Raffles Free Admission

2 | January 17, 2014

COMMUNITY

The Jewish Voice

INSIDE Business 26-27 Calendar 8-9 Community 2-6, 8, 14, 23, 25, 30, 32 D’var Torah 7 Food 15 Israel 13, 24 Obituaries 31 Opinion 10-11 Seniors 28-29 Simchas 33-34 We Are Read 35 Weddings 16-21

THIS ISSUE’S QUOTABLE QUOTE “His North Star was the survival of the State of Israel and the Jewish people.”

Alice Goldstein engages members of Temple Am David during a Chai Mitzvah class.

Rabbi Perlman.

Chai Mitzvah: A huge success at Temple Am David

By Wendy Joering wjoering@jewishallianceri.org When the Synagogue Outreach Initiative brought Chai Mitzvah to Rhode Island, Rabbi Richard E. Perlman and Temple Am David jumped at the chance to participate. “Temple Am David never misses a chance to partner with our community in the interest of Klal Yisrael [All of Israel] to offer as many opportunities to learn together with our members and friends.

When the Alliance brought this ideal program to our attention, it was a no-brainer; we signed on,” Rabbi Perlman stated.

The Chai Mitzvah program includes a nine-part study session with a specially designed curriculum. Participants will identify something Jewish they

want to learn about, take on (or deepen) an existing Jewish ritual, engage in a socialaction project and celebrate their achievement. In addition to learning in a group setting, participants have the opportunity to experience individual growth through one-on-one time with the educator (or two, as in this case).

Rabbi Perlman and Alice Goldstein, an educator and a longtime member of Temple Am David, co-teach this class. “Alice Goldstein is a sparkling gem in our community and in our synagogue. She goes the extra mile when it comes to teaching, and we are truly blessed to have her commitment and knowledge always. Alice doesn’t just say yes when we ask her to take on a teaching project – she lives

for this,” Perlman stated.

I decided I had to see the duo in action and attended the first of the nine sessions late fall.

The energy in the room was palpable. We spoke of life cycles and rituals, and everyone was deeply engaged. Together, Rabbi Perlman and Alice Goldstein made the group think – really think and engage in conversation. Before I knew it, the class was over.

When Rabbi Perlman was asked what the participants think of the class, he responded, “The participants are thrilled and truly engaged in this program. When we had to postpone our January session due to the snow, all we heard were questions of when will we be rescheduling. Listening to the participants talk about their

personal project was invigorating. How wonderful to hear and see people who are thirsting to learn as our members do.” This response did not surprise me – who wouldn’t want to learn from such a dynamic duo?!

Chai Mitzvah is currently being taught at Temple Am David.

To inquire about participating from now until the end of the session, please contact Rabbi Perlman at RabbiPerlman@ cox.net or 401-463-7944.

Chai Mitzvah is also being taught by Rabbi Naftali Karp at the Alliance JCC. For more information, please contact Wendy Joering at wjoering@ jewishallianceri.org 401-4214111, ext. 169.

COMMUNITY

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January 17, 2014 |

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A Camp JORI reunion Bingo with the camp’s alumni

By Irina Missiuro IMissiuro@jewishallianceri.org On Sunday, January 12, Camp JORI alumni gathered in the Alliance JCC Social Hall to play some bingo, reminisce about past summers and catch up with their friends. The camp might as well use the Kix cereal slogan, “Kids like JORI for what JORI has got. Moms like JORI for what JORI is not.” While the children raved about fun activities, such as Olympics, moms emphasized the camp’s focus on safety and communication (parents can send daily emails to their kids who, in turn, write letters) and the counselors spoke about instilling leadership values.

“I like how everybody is friends with each other.”

The Voice also heard from Lawrence Katz, Director of Jewish Learning at the Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island. He emphasized the transformative nature of camp, saying that campers retain the knowledge and experience they obtain during the summer for the rest of their lives, “Chil-

(left to right) Minna H., Zoe N., Jean G. and Leah C. dren with pivotal Jewish camp experiences are more likely to become adults who value their Jewish heritage, support Jewish causes and take on leadership roles in their communities.”

Jake Levin, JORI staff member, and Matan Graff, Israeli Shaliach (Emissary), spoke

about the Israel-immersion program, which was implemented for the first time last summer.

Calling the outcome highly successful, Graff explained that the teens spend four weeks in Israel to deepen their identity as Jews. Upon their return, they spend two weeks at the counselor-in-training program

IRINA MISSIURO

that teaches them to become responsible staff members. To enrich the teens’ worldview, eight to ten Israeli emissaries train them every summer. The Israelis collaborate with American counselors to offer an integrated and cohesive program.

The older kids are not the only ones to benefit from learn-

ing about their heritage. Besides various activity periods, including sports, swimming, theater and arts, campers enjoy Headline Israel – cultural programming that teaches the youngsters all about Israel – its music, food, people, geography and schooling. In addition, during Shabbat, children explore Jewish themes, such as Tikkun olam, a concept that means “repairing the world.” Campers recite Jewish poems and sing Jewish songs to celebrate the day of rest with a meaningful service and a delicious meal.

While JORI keeps Kosher in the dining hall, Levin emphasizes that the camp is incredibly accepting of children from all levels of faith.

To complement cultural, religious, artistic and athletic programming, the camp instills philanthropc habits in its campers. Graff and Levin stress that JORI teaches the children that community service doesn’t stop after camp.

During the summer, kids take on humanitarian projects that include beach cleanup and bench building. While engaging in those activities, they not only perform mitzvahs, but also JORI | 12

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Community

The Jewish Voice

This is not your bubbe’s bible

By Shelley A. Sackett Special to The Jewish Voice “Unscrolled: 54 Writers and Artists Wrestle With the Torah” presents 54 of the edgiest and most inventive d’vrei Torah imaginable. There are poems, stories, essays, memoirs, plays, recipes, an architectural rendering and a graphic novel. They are penned by contemporary Jewish luminaries such as A.J. Jacobs (“The Year of Living Biblically”,) Joshua Foer (“Moonwalking with Einstein”,) Damon Lindelof (“Lost”,) Jill Soloway (”Afternoon Delight” and “Six Feet Under”) and Josh Radnor (“How I Met Your Mother”).

“Unscrolled” had its genesis during animated Torah discussions at the annual meeting of Reboot, a national network of young Jewish creatives and intellectuals devoted to grappling with questions of Jewish identity, community and meaning. The lively Torah dialogues morphed into a book where 54 individuals wrestled with a single section of the Torah, yanking it into the 21st century.

These unorthodox riffs are as uneven as they are varied. While some are serious and traditional, others are hilarious, and some may really offend certain readers. The best stories are in Genesis

and Exodus. The results are simultaneously reverent and irreverent; sentimental and raunchy; somber and humorous.

While there is not a dull one in the mix, there are a few that confuse profanity with profundity; blasphemy with innovation.

What resonates, however, is how each author succeeded in personalizing the characters and tales of the stories we have heard over and over, year after year. This alone makes “Unscrolled” a

mouthy Rebekah at the well, and Esau, “the first Jew to wish he wasn’t.” We re-

Physically and organizationally, the book is a pleasure to read. Each section contains a synopsis of the parashah, with the particular verse that inspired the commentator’s interpretation.

These synopses, faithful to the biblical text, read with a narrative ease and fluidity. Their pages are bordered in luscious hues. In the back of the book is a user-friendly listing of each contributor, with just enough biographical detail to enhance reading his or her commentary.

We have all heard that humor is part of what binds us as Jews. The 2013 Pew Research Center survey of Jewish Americans reports that 42% believe “having a good sense of humor” is an essential attribute of being Jewish, ranking it higher than being part of a Jewish community, observing Jewish law or eating traditional Jewish foods. While “Unscrolled” may not be everyone’s cup of tea, for the Pew Study’s 42%, this book is a refreshing hoot.

think “an eye for an eye” through a wise and touching poem. The Tabernacle, all 7,200 cubits of it, finds a home in Manhattan as a vertical skyscraper. Another chapter lists it on MLS. You get the idea.

Note: Shelley A. Sackett (sackett.shelley@gmail.com) is a Providence native residing on Boston’s North Shore. This article originally appeared in the Jewish Journal, Massachusetts, and is reprinted with permission.

“We have all heard that humor is part of what binds us as Jews.” work of consequence.

For example, we sit beside Pharaoh at his computer as he Googles “boils,” “lice” and “frogs” on WebMD. We watch Zipporah pout, sulk and vamp as Moses’ neglected wife in a graphic novel version of Moses receiving the Ten Commandments. We hear a pensive Miriam muse to herself how she, “star of the sea, star of the river,” delivered her brother Moses not once, but twice. We meet a saucy,

Comedian Joel Chasnoff

“The Schizophrenic Zionist”

By Amy Olson Special to The Jewish Voice

Send us your simchas

Share your joyful events and happenings by submitting them for publication in The Jewish Voice.

Email to: editor@jewishallianceri.org or mail to: The Jewish Voice, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence, R.I. 02906

Joel Chasnoff, professional comedian, actor and veteran of the Israeli Army, will perform his one-man show “The Schizophrenic Zionist” at the Norman M. Fain Hillel Center, 6 Fraternity Circle, Kingston, R.I. on Thursday, January 30 at 7 p.m.

The show is free and open to the public.

Chasnoff is a stand-up comedian and writer with stage and screen credits in eight countries.

His comedic memoir, “188th Crybaby Brigade,” published by Simon and Schuster in 2010, chronicles his experiences as a combat soldier in the Israeli Army. Chasnoff has been the warm-up act for Jon Stewart and Lewis Black of The Daily Show, and performed in a USO Comedy Tour of the Far East entertaining American marines. He has performed at more than 1,000 comedy clubs,

colleges, festivals and Jewish events across North America, Israel, and Europe. His comedy, both stand-up and written, relies on non-degrading observations about the details of American life and his Jewish upbringing. (joelchasnoff.com) In his comedic presentation, “The Schizophrenic Zionist,” Chasnoff portrays four distinct Jewish characters, each with a unique view on what it means to have a relationship with Israel. Audience members then get the opportunity to converse with – and challenge – the characters and.

Chasnoff’s appearance is sponsored by URI Hillel with support from the University of Rhode Island Student Senate and the Student Affairs Diversity Fund.

For more information: contact Hillel at 874-2740 or visit the Hillel website at urihillel.org.

community

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January 17, 2014 |

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One Happy Camper

By Elanah Chassen Those who read “Camp and Israel Fair” (Jewish Voice Oct. 11, 2013) are aware of my passion for Jewish overnight camp.

For others, I encourage you to read it or take my word that attending Jewish overnight camp played a large role in my Jewish experience by helping create my own Jewish identity. Being away from home taught me how to be independent from a young age, to not be afraid of forming my own opinions and ideas, create lifelong relationships, the list goes on.

In my article, I shared my story and asked you to think about yours. I asked you to think about the choices and experiences that made you the person you are today and to ask yourself if you are happy with those choices. I would like you to think about those questions again, this time with your children in mind. What kind of identity do you want your child to have? Is it important for your child to learn about and have a connection to Israel and Judaism?

Jewish camp provides it all.

It intertwines Jewish values as well as culture and traditions into the camp atmosphere. Jewish and Israeli culture is celebrated through song, food, art and dance. Your child can learn

how to connect to their own identity and discover new skills and interests they may not have known they had.

Regardless of your religious practice, there is a Jewish camp where your child can have fun, feel comfortable and love being Jewish. While some camps are part of a specific Jewish movement, other camps are non-denominational and focus on providing positive Jewish identity-building experiences.

There are also specialty camps where your child can focus on a skill or interest. In addition to specialty camps, there are camps that accommodate campers with special medical and emotional needs. There is a Jewish camp ready to provide every camper with an outstanding summer.

Currently, there are 2,606 first time campers registered for One Happy Camper for summer 2014.

Resister today and add to this number!

Rabbi Peretz Scheinerman

Pictured with Judge Edward P. Sowa, Jr. are Goldie Taitelbaum, left, Bracha Leibowitz and Rochel Golden – attorneys; and Chana Devorah Peromsik, Tzipporah Kapilevech and Minya Schochet – witnesses. Chaya Kapilevich, not pictured, was the rules expert.

Team NEAT participates in Mock Trial PROVIDENCE – On January 7, the Mock Trial team from New England Academy of Torah (NEAT) participated in the second trial of the Rhode Island

For more information on camp options and to learn if you are eligible for the One Happy Camper $1,000 incentive grant, contact Elanah Chassen, Education and Planning Associate, EChassen@ JewishAllianceRI.org or call 421-4111, ext. 140. Registration for these grants takes place at onehappycamper.org

Mock Trial Tournament at the Garrahy Judicial Complex. The team from NEAT argued for the defense, beating Cranston West High School. In the previous

NNNN SSSSSS

trial, the NEAT team argued for the prosecution and prevailed. There is one more trial in the first round of the tournament.

? $50

MMMMM I. GGGGGGGGG, EEE. LLLLLLLL

RI & MA

(401) 725-5800

750 EEEE AAAAAA 1B, PPPPPPPPP, RI 02860 COLUMNISTS Dr. Stanley Aronson, Michael Fink, Rabbi James Rosenberg and Daniel Stieglitz

CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Brian Sullivan, Alliance Director of Marketing Kara Marziali, Alliance Director of Communications design & layout Leah M. Camara Advertising representatives Tricia Stearly • tstearly@jewishallianceri.org 421-4111, ext. 160 Karen Borger • ksborger@gmail.com 529-2538

Editorial Board Toby London, chair; John Landry, vice chair; Stacy Emanuel, Alliance vice chair; Brian Evans, Jonathan Friesem, Steve Jacobson, Rabbi Marc Jagolinzer, Eleanor Lewis, Richard Shein, Jonathan Stanzler and Susan Youngwood.

CONTRIBUTING WRITER Irina Missiuro Editorial ConsultantS Irina Missiuro | Judith Romney Wegner CALENDAR COORDINATOR Toby London

THE JEWISH VOICE (ISSN number 1539-2104, USPS Copy Deadlines All news releases, photo#465-710) is published bi-weekly, except in July, when it graphs, etc., must be received on the Thursday two weeks prior to publication. Submissions may be sent does not publish. to: editor@jewishallianceri.org.

PERIODICALS Postage paid at Providence, R.I. Advertising We do not accept advertisements POSTMASTER Send address changes to: The Jewish for pork or shellfish. We do not attest to the kashrut of any product or the legitimacy of our advertisers’ Voice, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence, RI 02906. claims.

PUBLISHER The Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island, Chair Sharon Gaines, President/CEO Jeffrey K. All submitted content becomes the property of The Jewish Voice. Announcements and opinions Savit, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence, RI 02906. contained in these pages are published as a service to the community and do not necessarily represent PHONE: 401-421-4111 • FAX: 401-331-7961 the views of The Jewish Voice or its publisher, the Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island.

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SMART goals are intelligent

By CaRlENE BaRtH It’s a new year and you may be wondering what you will do differently with yourself this year.

Have you set a new fitness goal or does an old goal need to be revisited? Regardless of whether you are just starting out, need to get back on track or ready to take your physical activity to the next level, J-Fitness has something for you.

Whatever the reasons for your goals, follow this proven path to setting and achieving them.

SMART goals are: Specific (I will go to the gym three times a week.)

Measurable (I will lose five pounds.)

Attainable (Anything too easy will become boring; too hard will become demotivating.)

Realistic (Don’t challenge yourself to do something you’ve never done before without taking the appropriate steps to get there.)

Timely (goals must have a clearly defi ned time frame including a starting date and a target date.)

If your goal is weight loss, we have great cardio classes – Spinning, Kickboxing, Boot Camp, Step and Zumba.

If you’re into strength training, come to any of our Strength

& Conditioning or Pilates classes, or make an appointment with a trainer.

Looking for something different? Try a water fitness class or

maybe belly dancing or Zumba.

We also have Iyengar Yoga and Vinyasa flow classes.

A healthy lifestyle is exactly that – a life style – not a fad or a phase but something you take

on and keep on for life. Setting SMART goals can help you both get there and stay there. Let us help you.

Look for future issues with more detailed descriptions of JFitness classes.

Zumba – fuses hypnotic Latin rhythms and easy-to-follow moves to create a one-of-akind fitness program that will blow you away! The routines feature fast and slow rhythms and resistance training combined to tone and sculpt your body while burning fat.

All levels.

Zumba Instructor Serena has a dance background in jazz, tap, salsa and ballet. She is a certified personal trainer by AAAI/ISMA with a master’s in education from Nova Southeastern University.

Serena creates personalized exercise solutions tailored to the individual client and says, “It’s important to customize the exercise to the person and not demand the person fit into the exercise.”

Carlene Barth (cbarth@jewishallianceri.org), Director of Health, Fitness & Aquatics, can be reached at 421-4111, ext. 210.

Fight bullying one novel at a time By maRty CooPER It can start out as what appears to be an “honest bump” or perhaps a “joke” at school, on the college campus, off the football field, in the locker room or at camp.

The act of bullying and its effects are fi nally getting the national attention needed to stop this epidemic that has been around for generations.

While bullying is often considered “children being children” or “a rite of passage to adulthood,” it is not. The effects of bullying can be minimal or devastating to the individual, a family, friends and the community.

The Community Relations Council (CRC) of the Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island is often contacted by members of the community when Anti-Semitic slurs or bullying occur. The CRC has met with school principals to discuss and address specific

instances of bullying. Other times, the CRC contacts the police or the Anti-Defamation League (ADL).

On January 9, the CRC invited Elaine Wolf, known as “the Anti-Bullying Novelist,” to speak at the Alliance. Wolf is the author of “CAMP” and “Danny’s Mom.” Both publications were originally meant to be read by young adults; however, both books are popular among parents, teachers, pr i ncipa ls, guidance counselors and camp counselors.

Marc Ladin, a retired school principal and author of “The Playground Bully Blues,” a children’s book that deals with bullying, introduced Wolf. During his introduction, Ladin shared stories from biblical texts that addressed bullying. Ladin then referred to Wolf’s two novels and the impact they both make on this issue in our society.

Wolf, a retired special education teacher in Long Island, BUllyiNG | 28

D’VAR TORAH

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The holiness of marriage Parashat Vayigash Genesis 44:18-47:27

By Rabbi Alvan Kaunfer The d’var Torah for this issue would normally be on this week’s Torah portion, Yitro.

However, the theme for this special issue is weddings. How might those two be combined?

As we know, a rabbi can find a connection between the weekly portion and practically any given topic! Yet, the portion Yitro actually lends itself to talking about the Jewish idea behind marriage. At the heart of the portion stands the Ten Commandments, one of the grand pillars of the Torah. As is familiar to most people, the seventh commandment forbids adultery. However, I would like to look at that commandment not in its negative formulation, but as expressing a positive Jewish value – the value of the sanctity of marriage and the holiness of an exclusive relationship.

The wedding ceremony itself celebrates this core value. The traditional wedding ceremony actually telescopes two ancient rituals which, during the talmudic period, were held a year apart. The purpose of separating the two ceremonies was to provide the couple an opportu-

nity to gather the necessities and belongings for their new household. Later in history, it became impractical to separate the two ceremonies, so they were joined together, as is our current practice. Each ceremony had its own distinctive blessings, and both were combined with the blessing over wine – which represents the joy of every celebration.

The first ritual was called erusin or “betrothal,” and the second nissu’in, “marriage,” after which the couple began living together in their own home, symbolized by the huppah, wedding canopy. Another term for the betrothal ceremony was kiddushin, meaning “sanctity” – the very theme we want to emphasize. The unique blessing for the kiddushin ritual emphasizes the exclusiveness of the relationship the new couple is about to enter. In it, we praise God for adding holiness to our lives and sanctifying this special exclusive and intimate relationship. The giving of the ring is part of this first erusin/kiddushin ceremony.

The second part of the wedding ceremony, nissu’in, has its own set of seven blessings for the bride and groom. These blessings (known as the Sheva B’rakhot) can be seen as a kind

of toast to the bride and groom (much like our modern toasts during the wedding feast) and provide an opportunity for the entire community to join in celebrating the marriage.

Originally, there were probably several local versions of the sheva b’rakhot, which, over time, became canonized into the seven blessings recorded in the Talmud (Tractate Ketubbot 7b-8a). The theme of creation and the concept that humans are created in the image of God are the dominant focus of the three blessings that follow the blessing over wine. Then comes the fifth blessing, expressing the hope that Jerusalem, as a symbolic mother, will gather her children. The sixth blessing asks God to “Grant perfect joy to these loving companions as you did for your creatures in the garden of Eden. We praise you for creating the joy of bride and groom.”

The final, long beautiful blessing thanks God for creating “joy and gladness, bride and groom, pleasure, song, delight, laughter, love and harmony, peace and companionship.”

Rashi, the great medieval commentator, noted that the closings of the last two blessings are almost identical. The sixth praises God “who causes

the groom and bride to rejoice,” while the seventh blessing ends by praising God “who causes the groom to rejoice with the bride.” The first of those, “groom and bride,” says Rashi, is really wishing the couple, as a unit, success and material goodness throughout their lives. That is a blessing for them as a household.

By contrast, the final blessing, “groom with the bride,” expresses the hope that they will have joy with each other, as two individuals who now come together, joining in love and happiness, in the marital bliss of their special relationship. In this way, the final blessing of the nissu’in ceremony echoes the idea of the opening blessing of kiddushin, namely, this is a special sacred relationship between two people who have come together to share their lives in sanctity.

This final blessing brings us back to our opening point: both the seventh commandment and the wedding ceremony emphasize the value and treasure of a caring, loving, special and exclusive relationship. How appropriate that the term for the marriage itself became kiddushin, reflecting the highest Jewish value of marriage – sanctity.

Rabbi Alvan Kaunfer is Rabbi Emeritus of Temple Emanu-El in Providence. He is on the faculty of the Shoolman Graduate School of Jewish Education at Hebrew College in Newton.

Candle Lighting Times Greater Rhode Island Jan. 17.......................4:23 Jan. 24.......................4:32 Jan. 31.......................4:41 Feb. 7..........................4:50

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calendar | COMMUNITY

The Jewish Voice

CALENDAR Ongoing Alliance Kosher Senior Café. Kosher lunch and program every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Alliance, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence. Noon – lunch; 12:45 p.m. – program. $3 lunch donation from individuals 60+ or under60 with disabilities. Neal or Elaine, 861-8800, ext. 107 Am David Kosher Senior Café. Kosher lunch and program every weekday.

Temple Am David, 40 Gardiner St., Warwick. 11:15 a.m. –program; noon – lunch. $3 lunch donation from individuals 60+ or under- 60 with disabilities.

Elaine or Steve, 732-0047

Continuing Through Feb. 27 Group Show at Habonim. 36 works by 21 artists, members of Lifelong Learning Collaborative Plein Air class. Temple Habonim, 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. Wednesdays and Thursdays 9 a.m. – 4 p.m., Fridays 9 a.m. – 1 p.m. and by appointment. 245-6536 or gallery@templehabonim.org

Continuing Through Feb. 28 “Your Fortunate Eyes.” Exhibit of photographs from 1930-50s by Rudi Weissenstein, curated by Ben Peter, Michal Amran and Andreas Grau-Fuchs, Pri-Or PhotoHouse Tel Aviv. See Feb. 5 entry for opening reception information. gallery (401), Alliance JCC, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence. Monday – Friday: 9 am – 5 pm; Sundays by appointment.

Erin Moseley at emoseley@jewishallianceri.org or 421-4111 ext. 108

Friday | Jan. 17 Early Shabbat for the Little Ones. Special story, candles, challah, songs and light supper. Congregation Beth David, 102 Kingstown Rd, Narragansett. 5:45 - 7:00 p.m. Stephanie at sjmalinow@ gmail.com

Saturday | Jan. 18 PJ Library Shabbat Storytime. For children ages 3 -8, with storyreader Professor Donny Jurkowitz. Congregation Beth Sholom, 275 Camp St., Providence. 10:15 – 11:15 a.m. officebethsholom@yahoo.com

Sunday | Jan. 19 Shireinu Celebrates Dr. King. Temple Sinai’s chorus joins several Cranston churches in musical celebration of the life and works of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Woodridge Congregational Church, 546 Budlong Road, Cranston. 6:30 p.m.

Dottie at 942-8350

Tuesday | Jan. 21

Temple Torat Yisrael’s Lunch and Learn with Rabbi Levin. Topic: The Jewish Juror or Witness in a Death

Penalty Case. Participants order from the menu and study Jewish sources addressing current issues. T’s Restaurant, 5600 Post Road, East Greenwich.

Noon. 885-6600 Larry Perlman Duo at EPOCH. Accompanied by bass guitarist, pianist Larry Perlman entertains with Dixieland jazz.

EPOCH Senior Living, 353 Blackstone Blvd., Providence. 2 p.m. 273-6565 Lecture on Marital Harmony by Rabbi Dovid Schwartz. Providence Hebrew Day School, 450 Elmgrove Ave., Providence. 8 p.m. Rabbi Schwartz at rds@ shaareitefillaprov.org or 914-5845340

Wednesday | Jan. 22 PJ Library Storytime. Story, songs, movement, crafts and holiday themed snack for children under 5. Alliance JCC Early Childhood Center @ Temple Habonim, 165 Meadow Road, Barrington. 10:30 – 11:30 a.m. Sara Foster at sfoster@jewishallianceri.org or 440-4376.

Thursday | Jan. 23

Habonim Adult Education “Time for Me” Series. Dr. Stephen Kaplan discusses “Creation of the Jewish Homeland in Israel and America: 1880 to 2013.” Temple Habonim, 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. 7 p.m.

245-6536, www.templehabonim.org or office@templehabonim.org

Friday | Jan. 24 Family First Friday Night: Early Kabbalat Shabbat Service with Camp JORI. Temple Emanu-El, 99 Taft Ave., Providence. 5:45 – 8 p.m. Ronni Saltzman Guttin at campjori@gmail.com

Saturday | Jan. 25

Israeli Music Night (Singing in Public - Shira Be’tzibur). Join Matan Graff for a night of live Israeli music. Alliance JCC Social Hall, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence. 7 – 8:30 p.m. Matan at 421-4111 ext. 121 or mgraf@jewishallianceri.org

Sunday | Jan. 26 Bar/Bat Mitzvah Expo. Many vendors, including DJs, florists, caterers, photographers, venues, and event planners.

Temple Sinai, 30 Hagen Ave., Cranston.

10 a.m. – 2 p.m. 942-8350 Lars Umanski in Concert. 16-year old Jewish foreign exchange student shares Jewish songs and popular music in Yiddish, Hebrew and Russian. Temple Habonim, 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. 3 – 4 p.m. office@templehabonim.org, 245-6536 or gallery@ templehabonim.org calendar | 9

Calendar Submissions Jan. 31 FINANCE and PHILANTHROPY issue must be received by Jan. 17.

Feb. 14 issue SENIORS, must be received by Feb. 5.

Feb. 28 issue, PETS/CAMPING, must be received by Feb.19.

Send all calendar items to Leah Camara at lcamara@jewishallianceri. org subject line: “CALENDAR.”

Rabbi Peretz Scheinerman

Mrs. Ilana Weissmann, Esther Perel Haldorsen, Gavriel Schwartz, Mendy Marks, Senator Whitehouse, Ze’ev Flig, Meir Mordechai Peromsik, Azriel Yudkowsky, Elka Taitelbaum

Senator Whitehouse goes to school By: Meir Mordechai Peromsik and Gavriel Schwartz This week, Senator Whitehouse came to visit the fifth grade at the Providence Hebrew Day School (PHDS). The reason he came was because we wanted to present a gift to him. On the day before Thanksgiving, we had a Thanksgiving assembly. At the assembly, students in grades 1-5 wrote (on special pieces of paper) why they are thankful to live in the United States.

Because our teacher, Mrs.

Ilana Weissmann, was in charge of the assembly, our class wrote many reasons in alphabetical order, from A to Z. Our class read all of the students’ work and selected the ones we thought were the best.

We put these on a large piece of bulletin board paper. Our teacher then arranged for Senator Whitehouse to visit.

On January 6, when Senator Whitehouse came, we presented the bulletin board paper to him. Each student read his/ her paper in alphabetical order.

After that, we each read other selections from the display.

Senator Whitehouse spoke to us about Rhode Island’s role in establishing religious freedom in this country. When he was finished speaking to us, he visited all of the other grades in our school. It was a special treat to have Senator Whitehouse come to our school.

Note: Meir Mordechai Peromsik lives in Pawtucket and Gavriel Schwartz lives in Providence. They are both fifth-grade students in PHDS.

calendar

thejewishvoice.org

from page 8

calendar

Sunday | Jan. 26 Green Reel Film Series at Congregation Agudas Achim “Money & Life,” an essay-style documentary that asks: Can we see the economic crisis not as a disaster, but as an opportunity? Discussion following film. Congregation Agudas Achim, 901 North Main St., Attleboro, MA. 6:30 p.m. 508-298-9450 or www. greenreelfilms.org

Monday | Jan. 27 Jewish Seekers Group. JewCurious?

Thinking about converting to Judaism?

Interested in learning more about it?

Congregation Agudas Achim, 901 North Main St., Attleboro, MA. 10 a.m. 508222-2243 Blood Drive. Temple Habonim, 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. 2 – 7 p.m. office@templehabonim.org

Wednesday | Jan. 29 Michael Fine at EPOCH. Michael Fine, M.D., director of RI Department of Health, speaks on ‘How to Turn a Market-Driven Mess into a Health Care System.’ EPOCH Assisted Living, One Butler Ave., Providence. 9:15 a.m.

275-0682

Thursday | Jan. 30 Joel Chasnoff at URI Hillel. Joel Chasnoff, professional comedian, actor, and veteran of the Israeli Army, performs his one - man show “The Schizophrenic

Zionist.” Norman M. Fain Hillel Center, 6 Fraternity Circle, Kingston. 7 pm. Amy Olson 874 2740 or amyolson@mail. uri.edu

Friday | Jan. 31 Scholar-in-Residence Shabbaton. Beth Sholom welcomes Rabbi Naftali Citron of the Carlebach Shul. Shabbaton topics include Prayer in the Talmud, Kabbalah and Chassidut, Mitzvot as Tools for Better Living, and The Top Ten Teachings of the Zohar. Congregation Beth Sholom, 275 Camp St., Providence.

4:45 p.m. - Mincha and Kabbalat Shabbat; 6 p.m. – dinner by Divine Providence Catering. $18 - adult, $10 - child under 12, $60 - family. 621-9393 or officebethsholom@yahoo.com ‫ה‬ey! It’s a relationship A Shabbat Dinner for Jewish Young Professionals. Jerusalem’s Rabbi Yakob Marcus speaking about the mystical letter Hey (‫ )ה‬and relationships. East Side of Providence, location TBD. 6:15 p.m. $15. 632 3165 or nkarp@projectshoresh.com www. projectshoresh.com

Saturday | Feb. 1 Beth Sholom Shabbaton Continues.

Congregation Beth Sholom, 275 Camp St., Providence. 9 a.m. - Services, sermon by Rabbi Citron, followed by kiddush; 4:30 p.m. - Afternoon services and Seudah Shlishit/Talk. 621-9393 or officebethsholom@yahoo.com

Family First Shabbat Morning Service.

Educational, interactive and entertaining service led by Rabbi Elan Babchuck intended for families of all ages; followed by lunch. Temple Emanu-El, 99 Taft Ave., Providence. 10:30 a.m. Rabbi Babchuck at ebabchuck@teprov.org K’Tantan Pajama Havdalah. Shabbat experience for young families. Open to temple and non-temple families. Family Shabbat dinner follows. Temple Beth-El, 70 Orchard Ave., Providence. 5:30 p.m. http://www.temple-beth-el.org/ or info@temple-beth-el.org or 331-6070 Adult Winter Bash. Musical entertainment by Briskets and Gravy. Dessert and drinks. Congregation Agudas Achim, 901 North Main St., Attleboro, MA. 7 – 10 p.m. $20. Bruce Ganek at bganek@ gmail.com or office@agudasma.org or http://www.agudasma.org

Sunday | Feb. 2 PJ Library Story Hour. Story and craft to celebrate Jewish holidays and traditions for youngsters aged 2-7. Congregation Beth David, 102 Kingstown Rd, Narragansett. 10:30 – 11:30 a.m. Stephanie at sjmalinow@gmail.com Shireinu Concert. The chorus of Temple Sinai performs for the Sinai Seniors group. Temple Sinai, 30 Hagen Ave., Cranston. 1:30 p.m. Dottie at 9428350.

January 17, 2014 |

9

10 | January 17, 2014

opinion

The Jewish Voice

Note from Publisher: Transitions are challenging but also bring about opportunities. Arthur Norman has resigned as Editor of The Jewish Voice, and we wish him well.

During this time of change, the staff at The Jewish Voice

A very narrow bridge

along with the Alliance marketing and communications team will continue to bring you, our valued readers, a quality product. The Jewish Alliance is currently conducting a search for an editor.

You’re cordially invited

By Kara Marziali “It’s just a piece of paper that folks throw away after the wedding is over,” my future mother-in-law retorted when I described the invitations her son Adrien and I picked out for our upcoming wedding. I, on the other hand, believed that the invitation to my wedding was the only chance I had to make a good first impression.

I wasn’t just announcing my celebration – in addition to telling people the details about my wedding and giving them a way to RSVP, my invitation would offer guests a foretaste of the nuptial event and reinforce the theme. This was to be one of the most significant days of my life, and I wanted my invitation to reflect that. Although one can argue that a guest may throw away the invitation long before the first grain of rice is tossed, I certainly did not want to mail a sub-par invitation to my guests.

Months later, Adrien’s mom phoned me. “Kara, I just received the wedding invitation.

It’s gorgeous! Absolutely stunning. This sets the tone for the whole affair, doncha think?”

Bingo.

In the same vein, The Jewish Voice acts as an invitation. It sets the tone, beckons you to

the celebration – a celebration of community – and invites you, dear readers, to be our guests.

This is a significant time, and the Alliance wants The Jewish Voice to reveal that.

You have probably noticed some recent changes in the newspaper over the past few months – its style and formatting, as well as changes in staff. The Jewish Alliance sees this as an opportunity for growth. As with my wedding invitations, we wouldn’t dream of sending an inferior invitation to our guests. Like some marriages, the road can sometimes be a bit bumpy, but we are committed to making the union work. Similar to a future bride and groom’s anticipation of their wedding day, this newspaper is giddy with excitement, anxious about the future and impatient for the honeymoon.

Consider this letter from the publisher an invitation to the wonderful surprises to come.

Our hope is that The Jewish Voice will be received with the same expectation, hope and joy as one finds when waiting the celebration of special moments.

Kara Marziali (kmarziali@ jewishallianceri.org) is the director of communications at the Jewish Alliance.

Tel Aviv dedicates monument to gays persecuted by Nazis JERUSALEM (JTA) — A monument to gays persecuted by the Nazis was dedicated in Tel Aviv.

The monument, the first of its kind in Israel, was constructed in Meir Park, near the Tel Aviv Gay and Lesbian Association Center.

The monument is made up of a concrete pink triangle along with a bench and a plaque providing information on the persecution of gays and lesbians during the Holocaust. Gays and lesbians were forced to wear an identifying pink triangle on their cloth-

ing in the same way that Jews were forced to wear a yellow star.

The inscription on the memorial reads in Hebrew, English and German: “In memory of those persecuted by the Nazi regime for their sexual preference and gender identity.”

“The significance here is that we are recognizing that there were other victims of the Holocaust, not just Jews,” Tel Aviv Councilman Eran Lev, said at the dedication on Jan. 10, according to The Associated Press.

our mission The mission of The Jewish Voice is to communicate Jewish news, ideas and ideals by connecting and giving voice to the diverse views of the Jewish community in Rhode Island and Southeastern Massachusetts, while adhering to Jewish values and the professional standards of journalism.

In 1995 Kay Redfield Jamison, Professor of Psychiatry at the Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine, published “An Unquiet Mind,” a breakthrough book on the subject of manic-depressive illness – today, most often referred to as “bipolar disorder.” What m a k e s t h i s book so special is that the IT SEEMS author makes public her “priTO ME vate experience o f m a d n e s s ” Rabbi Jim from a dual perRosenberg s p e c t ive: s h e tells her story from the subjective standpoint of a woman who has suffered from the disease for more than 30 years; at the same time she writes with the “objective” eye of a world-renowned expert in mood disorders in general and manic-depressive illness in particular.

Jamison experienced her first episode of manic depression in 1964, when she was a senior at Pacific Palisades High School on the west side of Los Angeles.

After her first relatively mild manic high, during which she found herself completely unable to slow down her body or her mind, she crashed into the darkness of depression – “virtually inert, with a dead heart, and a brain as cold as clay.”

Gradually her manias began to escalate “wildly and psychotically out of control;” at such times she likened her rapid-fire and confused thoughts to “a neuronal pileup on the highways of my brain.”

As night follows day, Jamison’s manias were followed by ever deeper and ultimately suicidal depressions. Nevertheless, she somehow managed to complete her undergraduate studies, followed by a Ph.D. in Psychology at UCLA; in 1974,

she joined the faculty of UCLA’s Psychiatry Department.

What I find most compelling in Jamison’s book is her ongoing “war with lithium,” which she first started taking in the fall of 1974, only – against the strong objections by her doctors – to stop taking it in the early spring of 1975. At first, she found the side effects of lithium intolerable; the medication made her nauseous and blurred her vision to the point that it was only with great difficulty that she was able to read.

Most significantly, lithium

“I had become addicted to my high moods; I had become dependent upon their intensity.” caused her to lose the creative edge she regularly experienced during her mild manias. As Jamison puts it, “I had become addicted to my high moods; I had become dependent upon their intensity, euphoria, assuredness, and their infectious ability in induce high moods and enthusiasm in other people … I found my milder manic states powerfully inebriating and very conducive to productivity.”

Unfortunately, her mild or “white” manias evolved into highly destructive “black” manias characterized by uncontrollable anger and violence, by an “inflammability” which “always lay just the other side of exaltation.”

As is often the case with people suffering from manic depression, Jamison’s refusal to take lithium on as regular basis led to her attempting suicide – ironically – by taking an overdose of lithium. After her recovery, she finally realized that she owed her life and her sanity to lithium, which – along

with competent therapy and her own iron will not only to survive but to thrive – has kept her on that very narrow bridge over the troubled waters of mania and depression. Over time, under careful monitoring by her doctors, she has been able to lower the dosage to the point that she can “swing” a bit more into brighter, more creative territory, although at the expense of some “controlled darkness” at the other end of the mood spectrum.

Though for the most part Jamison avoids religious language, in many ways “An Unquiet Mind” is a profoundly religious book – certainly not in any narrow sectarian sense but rather in the author’s passionate attempt to find life-affirming meaning in the face of her devastating disease. As she writes on the very last page, “Even when I have been most psychotic – delusional, hallucinating, frenzied – I have been aware of finding new corners in my mind and heart … always, there were those new corners and – when feeling my normal self, beholden for that self to medicine and love – I cannot imagine becoming jaded to life, because I know those limitless corners with their limitless views.”

In her courageous struggle to maintain her balance, to keep from falling into the dark hole of her always threatening manic-depressive illness, Jamison seems to be echoing the teaching of the much beloved Hasidic rebbe, Nachman of Bratzlav (1772-1810), who, according to many scholars, suffered from undiagnosed manic-depressive illness: “The whole world is a very narrow bridge, and the main thing is not to be afraid at all.”

James B. Rosenberg (rabbiemeritus@templehabonim. org) is rabbi emeritus at Temple Habonim in Barrington.

we have a voice … you have a voice You have a voice … and The Jewish Voice wants to hear it. This paper is only as vibrant and robust as our readers make it, with kudos, comments, criticisms and other contributions such as: online comments, letters to the editor and op-ed submissions.

Letters to the editor: 250 words or fewer and must be signed.

Op-ed essays: 500 – 800 words and must be signed.

Send to editor@jewishallianceri.org, subject line: OPINIONS. Questions? Call 4214111.

You have a

columns | letters policy The Jewish Voice publishes thoughtful and informative contributors’ columns (op-eds of 500 – 800 words) and letters to the editor (250 words, maximum) on issues of interest to our Jewish community. At our discretion, we may edit pieces for publication or refuse publication. Letters and columns, whether from our regular contributors or from guest columnists, repre-

sent the views of the authors; they do not represent the views of The Jewish Voice or the Alliance.

Send letters and op-eds to The Jewish Voice, 401 Elmgrove Ave., Providence, RI 02906 or editor@ jewishallianceri.org. Include name, city of residence and a contact phone number or email (not for publication).

opinion

thejewishvoice.org

letterS Re: Community Bread (Jan.3) I have sampled Lisa’s bagels, breads, and sweet things, and they are all worth the subscription to Community Bread. Yum! Kathleen Laplante

Re: The Yellow Sweater (Dec. 18) The delightful picture of Libby Abramson’s grandson Chase wearing a yellow sweater she had originally knitted when awaiting her own first child 60 years ago took me back down Memory Lane.

In 1959, expecting my first child, I too knitted a yellow baby jacket, cap and booties. Many expectant mothers back then did exactly this; in those days, we could not and did not know the gender of the fetus, so we all chose a neutral color – usually yellow. (Of course, had I known that all my children would turn out to be boys, I would have picked blue; and if Libby Abramson could have known that all her children would be girls, she would undoubtedly have selected pink.)

Like Libby, I passed on the yellow jacket to my grandchildren (but I kept the booties as a souvenir). I don’t have a yellow-clad grandchild’s photo available, and, alas, I can’t send photos of my own children wearing it, because, like most people back then, we were still using black and white film.

Judith Romney Wegner Providence Note: Judith Romney Wegner is an editorial consultant for The Jewish Voice.

Re: The Yellow Sweater (Dec. 20)

I don’t remember wearing it – but that is some strong yarn and good knitting. Thank you for a wonderful story!

Dale Abramson

Online letter: Edgar Bronfman (Jan. 3) We were devastated to learn of Edgar’s passing. He was an amazing man. It was a privilege to know him. God bless you and your family. He will be sorely missed.

Priscilla and Mike Sutton

Re: Louis Gitlin’s letter (Dec. 20)

Mr. Gitlin’s letter denigrated Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s absence from Nelson Mandela’s funeral. (Yuli Edelstein, speaker of the Knesset represented Israel.) Gitlin further rebuked Bibi for “driving a wedge between world opinion and Israel” and condemned “building in the occupied territories.” While Mandela welcomed South Africa’s Jewish community’s support in courageous efforts to abolish South Africa’s apartheid regime, Mandela’s halo is tarnished with memories of his biased rhetoric, which blindly supported Palestinian terrorism against Israel and turned truth upside down and stood it on its head.

For more than two millennia, Gitlin’s “world opinion” reflects historic, knee-jerk racist global anti-Semitism. Long before the word “settlements” was on their lips, pogroms, genocides and holocausts were committed against the Jews by “world opinion.” World Jewry, and now Israel, has always been the world’s favorite scapegoats and whipping boys. If there were no Jews, the racist, antiSemitic insane world would “manufacture” Jews in order to play their barbaric blame game.

If Arabs live as full citizens in Haifa, Tel Aviv and Jerusalem, then Jews have an historic, legal, moral and biblical right to dwell in Judea and Samaria, living side-by-side in peace. Our hearts, souls and support go out to Bibi who exemplifies Israel’s highest humane ideals and intrepid courage in the face of deaf, dumb, blind anti-Semitic “world opinion.” There will be no two-state solution, until Hamas/Hisbollah charters/Palestinian Authority renounce terrorism, recognize Israel’s right to exist, defensible borders, and cease teaching three-year old bullet-belted kids hateful propaganda.

Anne Schwartz Providence

Re: Berlin: a city that lives with the dead (Jan. 3)) Rabbi Jim Rosenberg’s article recalls sad memories. Berlin’s efforts are commendable no doubt. I experienced what the Germans now call the “Progromnacht,” and I question whether clever thermometer signs can counteract ingrained, virulent German antiSemitism. Hitler had a receptive population, and though many young people may harbor less prejudice, I strongly feel that antiSemitism remains part of the German psyche.

Ruth Oppenheim Barrington

January 17, 2014 |

11

My opinion: Ariel Sharon learned the limits of force

By Yossi Beilin (JTA) — Ariel Sharon’s development as a leader was very similar to that of Menachem Begin.

In the final years of their political careers, both men came to realize the limits of relying on force alone.

These realizations led to historic decisions: While Begin gave up the Sinai Peninsula — an area three times the size of Israel proper — Sharon withdrew from the entire Gaza Strip and four West Bank settlements, even though no one demanded this of him.

Both leaders demonstrated considerable courage in acknowledging that the national interest, as they had come to see it, clashed with everything they had previously believed and with the views of many of their followers. It was not for nothing that some of their erstwhile admirers came to regard them as traitors.

For decades, Sharon, the venerated military commander turned politician, had subscribed to a worldview that was simple and straightforward: The only thing that our Arab neighbors understand is force.

We cannot reach agreements with them because they seek our destruction and will continue to do so regardless of any treaties we sign. Territorial compromise will only weaken Israel in Arab eyes and lead to more demands. As there is no real prospect of peace, we must rely on our military might, cling to land conquered during the Six-Day War and wait for the world to eventually accept our control over that territory.

Sharon was the right’s bulwark. He made highly hawkish prime ministers like Begin, Yitzhak Shamir and Benjamin Netanyahu seem soft. He served in their Cabinets, never hiding his reservations about anything he perceived to be a concession.

He believed the whole world could be defied. He thought Jewish settlements should be set up at every turn in the occupied territories in the hope that establishing such facts on the ground would prevent future Israeli withdrawals. He was blunt in talks with world leaders, including U.S. presidents, and believed that courageous Israeli

leadership could bend the world to our will.

But some time after Sharon became Israel’s prime minister, he came to recognize just how wrong he had been. Israel is not North Korea. It is not isolated from the world. It depends on good international relations for its exports, for its security needs, for scientific and cultural partnerships, and for the preservation of the interests of Jewish communities in the Diaspora.

And he recognized the demographic problem that Israel faced. When he was elected prime minister, he was asked how Israel could continue to be a Jewish and democratic state if it had a Palestinian majority. He said he expected a million Jewish immigrants from the United States. It wasn’t long before he realized this was a pipe dream.

He saw that the Palestinian majority was around the bend and that the world would not accept a Jewish state if the majority of people under its control were Palestinians. He also realized that this would be a situation that many people inside Israel could not accept, either.

This turnabout seemed quite sudden. He famously suggested that there was no difference between Tel Aviv and Netzarim, a Jewish settlement in Gaza.

Yet only a short while later he decided to pull out of Gaza in a resounding rejection of everything he had preached. He tore down all the settlements there, evacuated the synagogues and cemeteries, and withdrew from every inch of Gaza back to the 1967 lines — against the protests of his former followers.

At the time, I headed the

Meretz party, which gave Sharon the Knesset majority that he needed, though we remained in the opposition. When the ultimate hawk finally ended the occupation of Gaza, we had to support him.

Until the very last moment, I tried to persuade him to withdraw in the framework of an agreement with the man whom the Palestinians had elected as their president, Mahmoud Abbas. In one of our talks, Sharon told me he did not trust the Arabs, and that is why he preferred a unilateral move to an agreement that he felt would amount to nothing more than a piece of paper. I regretted this deeply. I told him he was serving Gaza to Hamas on a silver platter. He explained that he saw no difference between the PLO and Hamas.

Sharon was right to leave Gaza, but he was wrong not to do so as part of an agreement.

Indeed, his unilateralism in some ways set back the cause of peace. On the Palestinian side, some said: Decades of negotiations brought no results, but terrorism forced even Sharon’s hand. In Israel, people asked: How can we make peace if even after we withdraw, they shoot at us? And the world still holds Israel responsible for what happens in Gaza. So while Sharon’s courage in withdrawing from Gaza and evacuating thousands of settlers is his greatest legacy, it is also a tragically ambiguous one.

Yossi Beilin served as a minister and deputy minister in five Israeli Cabinets and proposed the idea for what would become the Taglit-Birthright Israel program.

letter Re: Stock, a culinary playground on the East Side (Dec. 20) Thank you so much for this flattering profile! We love being part of this neighborhood and we want to make sure we are useful for the community.

Jan Dane Providence

Errata: Re: What teachers make (Jan. 3)

An introductory sentence was inadvertently omitted explaining that the story originated with Taylor Mali.

12 | January 17, 2014

COMMUNITY

The Jewish Voice

PHoToS | irina miSSiUro

Camp JORI Director Ronni Saltzman Guttin, left, laughs with event attendees. fRom PaGE 3

JoRi

create bonds that hold fi rm long after the weather cools.

Ronni Guttin, the executive director, must know what she is doing – last summer, the camp was completely full despite the addition of two newly built cabins. Levin estimates that JORI housed about 225 kids, most of whom keep coming back year after year. Graff thinks that the close-knit community is the camp’s greatest asset. Minna Hammarstrom, a camper, concurs. When asked what she enjoys most about JORI, she replied, “I like how everybody is friends with each other.” Zoe Nierman agreed, saying, “JORI is basically my second home.”

Katz elaborates on the transformative power of camps, such as JORI, “Jewish camp weaves Jewish values, culture and tra-

ditions into the fabric of camp, helping campers to connect to their own identity and the larger Jewish community.” Currently, through a Foundation of Philanthropic Funds, the Alliance is supporting children who would like to attend Jewish camp. FJC’s One Happy Camper program offers need-blind $1,000 grants to fi rst-time campers. Those interested can either contact Elanah Chassen, Education and Planning Associate, at EChassen@jewishallianceri. org or visit OneHappyCamper. org. Katz encourages parents to consider sending their kids to a Jewish camp because the impact is immediate. He says, “Campers return home connected to a community and friends that will last them a lifetime.”

(left to right) Sam S., Jordan H., Bob Ives (Camp JORI Program Director), Kevin S., Reese S., and Ben S.

Andrew Waldorf, Mia Lustig and Lauren Asner are proof of Katz’s assertion. They love their camp so much that the next summer will be their fi fth at JORI. While the girls cite their friends as the numberone reason for coming back, Waldorf brings up an Israeli game called Gaga as the draw.

He liked playing Gaga so much that he taught it to all the neighborhood kids. Recalling some fond memories, Lustig and Asner reminisce about raiding the kitchen in the middle of the night and roasting marshmallows during overnights. While on the topic of sweets, Waldorf brings up Candy Call, a daily

What is a Community Concierge?

By WENdy JoERiNG Several years ago Minna Ellison, Senior Vice President for Community Planning and Programming for the Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island, was in California staying at the Renaissance Hotel at LAX. She asked the hotel concierge if the hotel restaurant served fresh fish, and for directions to an art gallery she was interested in visiting. He directed her and she was on her way. The next morning when Minna arrived in the lobby, the hotel concierge handed her a list of restaurants that specialized in fresh, delicious fish dishes and museums and art galleries that might interest her. She was floored. What started out as a good customer service experience became a fabulous customer service experience.

Minna thought how wonderful would it be to have this level of service in our Jewish community— to have a concierge that could connect and direct people to programs and services that best meets their needs.

Over the past four years, the Alliance Concierge position has evolved into something

larger then could have been anticipated. As the Community Concierge for the Jewish Alliance of Greater Rhode Island, I have connected people to kosher caterers, synagogues and day schools; introduced them to programs at the Alliance JCC, the Barrington ECC site, and PJ Library and Shalom Family; as well as connected them to much needed resources that they were able to obtain through JFS, JSA and 211. I have met people for coffee early Sunday mornings when they are in the house hunting phase visiting

RI, so when they do make the move I can help them make it as seamless as possible. I have had long conversations with individuals to really get to know them in order to help them make meaningful connections

to resources that will help them in daily life.

It must be close to wedding season because recently I have received several calls regarding wedding planning. I was able to provide to an out-of-state mother whose daughter is getting married in RI, a list of local rabbis, kosher caterers in New England and local florists.

To a couple who called doing all of the wedding planning themselves and want to make their own mark, I suggested visiting the library at the Alliance for resources that can help personalize their special day and create new traditions. Whether you live out of state and are not familiar with the territory, or you live locally and just need a little hand, I am able to help you navigate.

Whether you need to fi nd the Synagogue that meets your needs, or you need to fi nd that caterer for your “big day,” I make the connections – you make the choice!!

Wendy Joering can be reached at 401-421-4111 x 169 or wjoering@jewishallianceri.org

treat the campers look forward to with impatience.

Other highlights the children mentioned include sock wrestling – a sport that involves wearing really high socks, sitting back-to-back, locking arms and trying to get each other’s socks off. What about Revival, another unforgettable and fun event that’s highly anticipated?

Campers write anonymous poems about one another; Guttin reads them in front of everyone. The stars of the poems get thrown into a pool, along with anyone related to them.

Besides the two pools, a gorgeous lake, where campers can go canoeing and tubing, brings

much joy. Jean Ganek chose those activities as her favorite, saying, “I like everything at the waterfront.” Kids who prefer drier pastimes take part in Rope Burn, an activity during which campers compete by building huge towers out of sticks and setting them on fi re to see whose rope will burn through fi rst. Whether it’s water or fi re that attracts, those who are interested in exploring Camp JORI further should schedule a tour – Levin maintains that it’s the best way to get a sense of the camp. Visit CampJORI.com for all the details.

D’var in the Bar

By ElaNaH CHaSSEN When I first moved to Rhode Island six months ago, I wondered how meeting people worked in the real world. Sure, I have my coworkers whom I enjoy working with, but how will I meet people my age in the area?

Life has a funny way of working out difficulties. As I started my new life in Rhode Island, (401)j also started its new life.

(401)j is a community without borders, where young people (in their 20s, 30s, and 40s) are able to grow, connect, learn and form lasting friendships.

There are “Clusters” of peerled groups of Jewish young adults who create community through the pursuit of a common interest. Clusters are overseen by (401)j, but are organized, coordinated and led by a community member. Members can choose a Cluster they’d like to participate in or create their own.

In the past few months, I’ve met a diverse group of young Jewish professionals who, as I am, are interested in meeting others their age. As I learned what (401)j Clusters were, I know that I not only wanted to take part, but also to create one.

During the past few months, Rabbi Barry Dolinger and I have been working together to

create D’var in the Bar, a collaborative conversation on contemporary Torah topics. Every six or so weeks, D’var in the Bar will meet – each time featuring a different speaker and topic. This is an opportunity to explore Jewish learning in a casual atmosphere.

But D’var in the Bar is more than that. Giving is an important component of our learning.

Each time we meet, we will be giving back to our community by asking people to bring clothing, a non-perishable food item, or money that will go to a specific charity.

Interested? The first D’var in the Bar will take place on Wednesday, January 22, at 6:30 p.m. at Doherty’s East Ave Irish Pub in Pawtucket. Rabbi Dolinger will lead our first discussion. We will be exploring “The Forgotten New Year of the Trees.” Learn about the religious and secular resolutions to live responsibly and give back.

Whether you are new to the area or have been a Rhody resident for a “wicked” long time, join the conversation!

Elanah Chassen (echassen@ jewishallianceri.org) is the education and planning associate at the Jewish Alliance.

ISRAEL

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SHaRoN

peace with the same iron determination.”

Israeli President Shimon Peres called Sharon “a friend, a leader, a military chief.”

He added, “Arik, you were a rare man. You turned the impossible into great opportunities.

Rest in peace, great leader.”

Current Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu acknowledged in his eulogy that he and Sharon did not always agree with each other, but said they served in each other’s governments and supported each other “for Israel’s sake.”

Netanyahu called Sharon “one of the greatest generals that the Jewish people and the Israel Defense Forces had ever known.”

Shimon “Kacha” Kahaner, who fought alongside Sharon in the fabled Unit 101 in the 1950s, called Sharon, “my commander, teacher and rabbi.”

“Arik’s strength came from his love of the land and from what the land gave him. It was a twoway relationship,” Kahaner said.

Settler leader Ze’ev “Zambish” Hever, a close friend of Sharon, called Sharon a “hero of Israel” and said his last two years in office, referring to the expulsion of Jews from Gaza settlements, “painful and difficult.”

“The questions go unanswered. But as you commanded, we will not give up. We will not give up,” Hever said.

Sharon’s casket was taken to the Latrun Armored Corps Museum and Memorial, where 15 Israeli major generals saluted the late military and political leader. Some drivers stopped on the highway for the procession and got out of their cars to salute the military vehicle as it drove by; others filmed it on their cellphones.

The convoy then continued to Sharon’s Sycamore Ranch in the Negev for a private funeral attended by family and close friends, after which Sharon was buried next to his wife, Lily.

roBerT d. Ward Via WiKimedia CommonS.

U.S. Secretary of Defense Donald H. Rumsfeld (left) escorts Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon (right) into the Pentagon at the conclusion of a full honor arrival ceremony for Sharon at the Pentagon on March 19, 2001.

A timeline: Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon’s life

By BEN SalES aNd Naomi SEGal/Jta 1928 — Born Ariel Sheinerman in Kfar Malal, near Tel Aviv.

1942-48 — Member of the Haganah, the pre-state Jewish fighting force.

1948 — Wounded while serving as an infantry commander in Israel’s War of Independence.

1952-53 — Studies history and Oriental studies at Hebrew University.

1953 — Founder and commander of the Unit 101 antiterror force, which carries out raids in retaliation against Arab attacks. One raid by Unit 101 leaves 69 dead in the Jordanian-controlled West Bank village of Qibya and draws international condemnation.

1954-57 — Commander of a paratroop brigade that captures the strategic Mitla Pass during the 1956 Sinai War with Egypt.

1957 — Attends Camberley Staff College in Great Britain.

1958-62 — Studies law at Tel Aviv University.

1964-65 — The Israel Defense Forces chief of staff, Yitzhak Rabin, appoints him to be chief of staff for the Northern Command.

1967 — During the Six-Day War, commands an armored division in the Sinai Desert and directs a battle that successfully recaptures the Mitla Pass and the corridor to the Suez Canal.

1969-73 — Heads the IDF’s Southern Command. After August 1970, focuses on fighting Palestinian terrorism in the Gaza Strip.

1973 — Retires from the military to pursue political career and works at establishing the Likud Party. With outbreak of Yom Kippur War, returns to active military service to command an armored division that crosses the Suez Canal.

1973-74 — Elected to Israel’s eighth Knesset, under the Likud banner.

1974 — Proposes that Israel negotiate with Palestinians toward the establishment of a Palestinian state in Jordan.

1975-76 — Appointed special defense adviser to Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin.

1976 — Forms the Shlomtzion Party. The party wins two Knesset seats, but soon merges into the Likud.

1977-81 — Minister for agriculture and chairman of a ministerial committee for settlement under Prime Minister Menachem Begin. Considered a patron of the Gush Emunim settlement movement, Sharon advocates establishing a network of Jewish settlements.

1981-83 — Appointed minister of defense by Begin.

April 1982 — Carries out last phase of Israeli evacuation from northern Sinai as part of peace agreement

with Egypt.

1982 — With Sharon as defense minister, Israel invades Lebanon in Operation Peace for the Galilee.

1983-84 — Resigns as defense minister but remains as minister without portfolio after a government commission fi nds Sharon indirectly responsible for the September 1982 massacre of Palestinians

by Lebanese Christian forces at the Sabra and Shatila refugee camps.

1984 — Files a libel suit against Time magazine over article on Sharon’s role in the Lebanon war. A New York jury eventually rules that the article was defamatory but did not have malicious intent.

GPo Via GeTTY imaGeS 1984-90 — Serves as minister for industry and trade in national unity Ariel Sharon chatting with former Prime Minister David Ben Gurion during a bus tour of Israeli army installations in 1971. government.

1990-92 — Named minister for Path. Sharon also begins construction of a separation construction and housing in a Likud-based government barrier between the West Bank, Gaza and Israel. formed by Yitzhak Shamir. Continues to encourage JANUARY 2003 — Sharon wins a second term as prime development of settlements in territories and oversees minister, and Likud doubles its Knesset faction to 38 vast construction effort to create housing for massive seats. wave of immigration from former Soviet Union.

DECEMBER 2003 — Sharon surprises his base by 1991 — Objects to Madrid peace conference under announcing disengagement plan, wherein Israel would Shamir. withdraw fully from the Gaza Strip, relocating almost 1996 — Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu creates 10,000 settlers. national infrastructure portfolio for Sharon in new JULY 2004 — Sharon sparks controversy by calling Likud-led government. on French Jews to make aliyah due to rising anti1998 — Becomes foreign minister following resignation Semitism in France. of David Levy; helps negotiate Wye River accord.

NOVEMBER 2004 — Yasser Arafat dies. Sharon says 1999 — Netanyahu resigns as Likud leader and he will meet with the new Palestinian leadership but appoints Sharon as caretaker. Sharon later wins the continues advancing his disengagement plan. position outright in a party vote.

JULY 2005 — The IDF executes the disengagement JULY 2000 — Prime Minister Ehud Barak is left plan, encountering widespread civil disobedience but without a parliamentary majority when Shas, National little violence from settlers. Sharon addresses the Religious Party and Yisrael Ba’Aliyah leave the Israeli public. government over the Camp David summit.

NOVEMBER 2005 — Facing opposition from the Likud SEPT. 28, 2000 — Sharon visits the Temple Mount in due to the disengagement, Sharon breaks off from his Jerusalem and Palestinian riots erupt, marking start party and forms the centrist Kadima Party ahead of of second intifada. the 2006 elections. Sharon’s allies in Likud, as well DECEMBER 2000 — Barak’s resignation forces new as several Knesset members from other parties, join elections for prime minister. Sharon becomes the Kadima.

Likud Party candidate.

JANUARY 4, 2006 — Sharon suffers the second of two 2001 — Sharon wins prime ministerial election in a strokes in quick succession, leaving him in a vegetative landslide, garnering 62 percent of the vote to Barak’s 38 state. percent. He forms a unity government with the Labor JANUARY 11, 2014 — After eight years in a coma, Sharon Party. dies from multiple organ failure at age 85.

2002 — After escalation of Palestinian suicide bombings in the second intifada, Sharon launches Operation Defensive Shield and Operation Determined

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community

The Jewish Voice

The Mothers Circle celebrates fifth anniversary Cake with Kit Haspel at the Alliance JCC Open House

By Irina Missiuro IMissiuro@jewishallianceri.org

Thank You To Our Advertisers!

On Sunday, January 5, Alliance JCC held an open house, and the Mothers Circle celebrated its fifth anniversary as an invaluable resource to women of other religious backgrounds raising Jewish children. Past program participants and perspective members gathered to listen to Dr. Kit Haspel, Director of Interfaith Outreach at the Alliance. Haspel explained the reason for the celebration and introduced a young woman named Jen, who spoke about Mothers Circle and its role in her life, saying that the program grounded her after a major life shift by offering a community of other moms and educating her. Haspel kicked off the celebration with a Shecheyanu Blessing, which praises God for sustaining us. After reciting the Hebrew verse, she smiled and said, “OK, now we can have cake.” The enormous cake, adorned with colorful cream balloons, succeeded in uplifting the mood of the little ones at the event.

These children, after all, were the main reason for the Mothers Circle course, which Kit Haspel has been facilitating since 2008. A former clinical psychologist, Haspel received a master’s degree in Jewish studies in 2007 and wanted to incorporate her expertise in a new setting. She approached Minna Ellison, now Senior Vice President for Community Planning and Programming, about focusing on interfaith work and the rest is history. Haspel scored a grant in 2008 from the Helene and Bertram Bernhardt Foundation (now the Jewish Alliance funds the project) to launch the Rhode Island chapter of the na-

tional program created by the Jewish Outreach Institute.

For the past five years, the program has proven to be a hit with women in interfaith relationships looking to receive guidance on all things Jewish.

Many of them enjoy the nonthreatening setting, which provides them with an opportunity to learn and bond with other moms. During the 16 sessions, which take place throughout eight months, they explore Jewish history, culture, holidays, rituals and values. Every two weeks, they engage with the basic principles of the religion, learn how to create a Jewish home and deal with any issues

“It’s about accepting people for who they are and offering gratitude for what they’re doing.” that might arise in an interfaith household. Of course, socializing with women who are grappling with the same struggles, such as celebrating major religious holidays, helps tremendously. Many form lasting friendships and enjoy regular play dates with their kids.

Haspel emphasizes that the program is “absolutely not about conversion. It’s about accepting people for who they are and offering gratitude for what they’re doing.” The mothers present at the event echoed her sentiments. All appreciated the help the course provided in following the Jewish lifestyle, especially getting ready for and celebrating the holidays and Shabbat. Kelly Metzger loved MOTHER’S CIRCLE | 24

FOOD

thejewishvoice.org

A festive treat for wedding celebrations

By PaUla lEviNE WEiNStEiN aNd JUliE komERofSky REmER In Mexico, they are called wedding cookies. In Russia, they are called tea cakes. And in Europe, they are called Butter Nut Balls, Viennese Sugar Balls or Snowballs. Whatever you call them, their roundshaped, butternut flavor and powdered sugar coating make them a festive treat.

Wedding Cookies INGREDIENTS:

4 sticks butter 1 cup powdered sugar 4 1/2 cup flour 1/2 tsp. salt 2 tsp. vanilla extract 1 1/2 cup fi nely chopped pecans or walnuts more powdered sugar for rolling

sheet (or parchment lined) in 400-degree Fahrenheit oven for 10-12 minutes.

5. Cool slightly. While still warm, roll until cookies are covered in powdered sugar.

1. Cream butter and sugar.

2. Add other ingredients and mix until blended.

3. Make balls by rolling 1 teaspoon of dough.

4. Bake on ungreased cookie

Previously frozen cookies may need to be rolled again in powdered sugar after thawing.

Replacing butter with Pareve margarine is not recommended as much of the flavor comes from the butter.

PREPARATION:

PHoTo | moniCa Holland/liCK THe BoWl Good

NOTES:

Paula levine Weinstein and Julie komerofsky Remer managed Catering by Paula Weinstein in Columbus, Ohio, for more than 20 years. Their fi rst cookbook, “Our Customers’ Favorites,” sold out twice.

Their newest cookbook, “Dinner Du Jour and More!” includes their customers’ favorite recipes.

Mazel Tov and Siman Tov Celebrating good times and the making of a fairytale wedding Ratatouille Princess-Style (serves 8 – 10)

By kaRa maRziali Because your calendar is full with simchas all year, Georgie Tarn and Tracey Fine, creators of the Jewish Princess brand, have written another Jewish Princess book to make every holiday successful.

“The Jewish Princess Feasts & Festivals” is a witty and modern look at Jewish celebrations. Divided into three sections – Festivals, Celebrations and Feasts – the book includes culinary inspiration for every event. Covering holidays including Passover and Hanukkah, weddings and bar/bat mizvahs, this book is more than simply a collection of recipes.

Within the pages, the authors infuse gourmet recipes with Jewish traditions relevant to a modern reader. Although Tarn

INGREDIENTS

Tracy Fine and Georgie Tarn and Fine poke fun of the “princess” stereotype, both women are successful entrepreneurs; make no mistake, these women are smart, strong and savvy.

In addition to a myriad of appealing recipes and ideas for hosting any occasion, Tarn and Fine amuse the reader with humor. In the chapter on weddings, they liken the gala to a fairy tale and, besides the dress, they remind the reader “food plays an important part.”

This book is not mere fluff, however. The recipes are gastronomic delights, including Grandma’s Matzo Pudding, Sweet-and-Sour Meatballs, Challah Pizza, and (of course!)

Hamantaschen. As the book Hamantaschen jacket boasts, “Your mother will kvell when she sits down to your feasts!”

Tracey Fine and Georgie Tarn, lifelong friends who collaborated on the successful “Jewish Princess Cookbook,” are also food columnists for The Jewish Chronicle. Visit them online at TheJewishPrincess.com.

6 tablespoons light olive oil 1 red onion, cut into chunks 3 zucchini, about 1¼ pounds in total 2 small eggplants, about 1 pound in total 2 red bell peppers, sliced 12 small plum or cherry tomatoes, about 5 ounces in total 1 tablespoon fresh thyme leaves 1/3 cup chopped parsley 1 garlic clove, crushed Salt and pepper to taste 2/3 cup tomato paste 1 tablespoon sugar

METHOD

Heat the olive oil in a deep sauce pan. Add the chopped onion and fry until translucent.

Trim the zucchini and cut each into three sections. Slice each section in half lengthwise, then thinly slice lengthwise (approximately 2 inches long).

Put into saucepan.

Cut the eggplants into thick slices, then slice again several times. Add to the zucchini along with the sliced peppers.

Add all the rest of the ingredients to the saucepan.

Put a lid on the saucepan and turn down the heat. Cook for about 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. kara marziali (kmarziali@ jewishallianceri.org) is the director of communications at the Jewish Alliance.

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16 | January 17, 2014

WEDDINGS

The Jewish Voice

What’s trending at Jewish weddings?

Tradition with a Personal Touch By tHE JEWiSH voiCE Staff

T

he biggest trends in weddings, Jewish or otherwise, are tradition and the personal touch. From the invitation and dress to the music and menu, the personality of those getting married is on full display.

So how can you make your wedding trendy while keeping it traditional? Here is our topten list of wedding trends and how to make them your own.

Invitations

The invitation is no longer a logistical summons to attend your nuptials. Invitations are now a preview of what you have in store for your guests. Get creative – use non-traditional materials such as wood, metal or cloth. Tell your love story through imaginative graphics, colors and fonts – adding Hebrew text can enhance and personalize the design of your invitation.

The dress

Nothing captures the spirit of the day quite like the bride’s dress. Fashion trends change on a yearly and, sometimes, daily basis. So how do you fi nd the perfect gown for you? Know who you are and what you’re comfortable in. Don’t be afraid to go the traditional route.

While still keeping in line with current trends, wearing lace and sheer fabric is a great

way to cover skin that would normally be exposed.

Reception

Think about the style of your wedding and choose a venue that complements it. Keep in mind when choosing your venue that it should set the stage

for what’s to come. Whether it’s a synagogue, country club, vineyard, rustic farm, or the beach, choose a venue that balances your personality and the tone of your special day.

Flowers Try combining tradition and trend to create beautiful wedding centerpieces. Whether it’s

geometric vases with seasonal blooms or mason jars with locally grown flowers, this is another chance to inspire the artist within.

WEDDINGS

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Menu From shooters and sliders to food on a stick, the trend in wedding fare is all about the creative retelling of comfort food. This is true from the first course to the last. Take your favorite food and reimagine it in bite-sized servings.

Huppah

The huppah is trending in Jewish and non-Jewish weddings alike. Traditionally, the huppah represents the couple’s new home. Not all homes are the same so why should your huppah be?

Try combining traditional and non-traditional materials to update your huppah – flowers and Lucite, crystal beads and tree branches, or adding a hand-painted backdrop. You

can also add personality and tradition by repurposing a family member’s wedding dress into the design of your huppah

Candy Bar

Photography

Two big trends in wedding photography are the wedding book and the a la carte packages. Sure, prints and downloadable image galleries are fine.

But more and more couples are relying on the artistry and design abilities of a good photographer. And a la carte packages allow the bride and groom to customize their add-ons to their own specifications and budget.

Cupcakes

Nothing says trendy like ditching the wedding cake and opting for a tiered cupcake display. You can add some personality and whimsy by using

an ornamental stand, intricate decorations or elegant cupcake liners.

No, not that kind of candy bar. Add an element of surprise for your guests with a colorfully crafted confectionary spread. Use the color theme of your wedding to augment your dessert offerings. Candy-filled apothecary jars, personalized chocolates and decorative cupcakes are just a few ideas.

Favors

Instead of spending time and money on something that your

January 17, 2014 |

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guests probably won’t use, try adding an element of tzedakah.

Choose a charity that’s close to your heart and make a contribution in honor of your guests.

18 | January 17, 2014

WEDDINGS

The Jewish Voice

A Brief Resource Guide to Jewish Weddings By laWRENCE katz Director of Jewish Learning One of the most enduring books for couples planning a Jewish wedding is Anita Diamant’s “The New Jewish Wedding.”

Many of you may be most familiar with Diamant as the prize-winning Boston Globe journalist and novelist who wrote “The Red Tent,” “Good Harbor,” “The Last Days of Dogtown” and the soon-tobe -publ ished “Rockport Lodge.”

She also writes guides to Jewish practice.

“The New Jewish Wedding” first appeared in 1985, but Diamant revised and updated it in 2001.

She covers everything, from “Making the Tradition Your Own” to all aspects of planning the wedding (choosing a rabbi, invitations, rings, the party) and all aspects of Jewish wedding ceremonies (Tenaim, the Huppah, the Ketubah). She even deals with genetic testing. Her appendices include wedding poems. This book is

published by Fireside/Simon & Schuster.

Gabrielle Kaplan-Mayer wrote “The Creative Jewish Wedding Book: A Hands-On Guide to New & Old Traditions, Ceremonies & Celebrations.” Kaplan-Mayer’s book is not a planning guide.

Rather, it is more of a guide to creating the wedding of your dreams by shaping your own ceremony, thinking creatively a b o u t Jewish food and music, cra f t i ng your own Ketubah, Ketubah and considering wedding décor a n d clothing Jewish Lights Publishing is the source for this book.

One powerful part of any wedding is music, especially the processional. Jews tend to stay away from “Here Comes the Bride,” as its composer, Wagner, was a well-known anti-Semite.

In my own wedding, and those

of many of our friends, we used Erev ha-Shoshanim (Evening of Lillies)Ani L’Dodi v’Dodi Li (I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine) is a popular Biblical verse that has been set to music. As a recently released film mentions, Hava Nagilah has become the quintessential song of Jewish wedding parties, not just of hockey games. A great resource for appropriate music is “Kol Dodi: Jewish Music for Weddings,” edited by Mary Feinsinger for Transcontinental Music Publications. This comes in two formats: printed music and a two-set DVD. However, there are many areas that couples deal with even before they start planning a wedding: intimacy, friends, names, finances, and so on. “Meeting at the Well: A Jewish Spiritual Guide to Being Engaged,” by Daniel Judson and Nancy H. Wiener, deals with these pre-wedding topics. It is available from the URJ Press (Union for Reform Judaism) The Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis offers an Orthodox perspective in “The Committed Marriage: A Guide to Finding a Soul Mate and Building a Relationship Through Timeless Biblical Wisdom.” It begins with finding your soul mate and goes on to building a loving relationship and on to growing old together in dignity. The publisher

is HarperOne. “The Aleph-Bet of Marriage: Journeying Toward Commitment,” is in a similar veinIn addition to intimacy, it deals with

communicating, fighting fair and the art of negotiating. It is written by Lynn Levy and is available from URJ Press Some people are often overlooked at weddings. Among them are children, who may be invited to an event that they know nothing about “Beni’s First Wedding” by Jane Breskin Zalben (Henry Holt and Company) is a fine introduction in the form of a story. “Mazal-Tov: A Jewish Wedding” by Jose Pat-

terson (and the Jewish Museum of London) is a more direct photographic introduction for children to what happens at Jewish weddings.

Hardly any wedding, or any ritual event these days, is solely a Jewish affair. Non-Jews who would like to know what may occur could be directed to “How to Be a Perfect Stranger: A Guide to Etiquette in Other People’s Religious Ceremonies.” Edited

by Arthur J. Magida and published by Jewish Lights in two volumes, it has a few pages on wedding ceremonies (and most other rituals) in dozens of different religions, not just our own.

It covers proper attire, gifts, details of the ceremony and the reception.

Last, there are the possible new spouse and the new in-laws.

Rabbi Kerry M. Olitzky, author of “Making a Successful Jewish Interfaith Marriage,” has also written “Introducing My Faith and My Community: The Jewish Outreach Institute Guide for the Christian in a Jewish Interfaith Relationship.” This is a compact guide to Judaism and Jewish life.

Note: These resources are in the Jewish Alliance Library.

Contact Larry Katz at LKatz@ jewishallianceri.org.

WEDDINGS

thejewishvoice.org

January 17, 2014 |

19

The importance of the wedding invitation By amaNda CURSaRo Each time I hear, “I don’t want to waste a lot of money on invitations because people just throw them away,” I cringe.

I agree. People will toss invitations that glaringly show there was no thought or effort put into them. No one expects a guest to keep something that even the bride and the groom don’t care about. Invitations are one of the most essential parts of planning a wedding because they set the tone of what guests are to expect on the wedding day while, at the same time, helping them prepare for your event. In turn, it will keep them out of the trash and in the memory books! Below are a few reasons why invitations are so important and the information you should include on them.

Setting the Tone

Have you ever received an invitation in the mail and been able to envision the wedding day? Well, if your answer is no, then you’ve probably never received an invitation that properly set the tone. If your answer is yes, those brides and grooms did it right! The invitation to anything, especially to a wedding, should exude the theme of the event to come. A full-on extravagant bash, complete with a fi reworks send-off should have an equally extravagant invitation – imagine receiving an engraved invitation suite on Crane’s fi nest stock, placed in a silk box, hand-tied with satin ribbon and adorned with a rhinestone brooch. You would know to dress in your fi nest attire and expect nothing but the best at the event, which means the invitation is setting the tone perfectly.

Above left is an invitation I created for clients, Casey and Josh. It’s the perfect example to express that you don’t have to spend thousands of dollars on the ideal invitation for your big day. The couple wanted something sweet and simple for their $5,000 Valentine’s Day Wedding and, I think, the invitation suite exemplifies that perfectly! Their custom monogram, c&j, and their colors – brown, pink and red – were continued throughout the entire event.

Creating Excitement and Anticipation

Receiving the perfect invitation in the mail should make you ready for the wedding to arrive. If a bride and groom put thought into what their invitation looks and feels like, it is defi nitely conveyed to the guest.

A fun-fi lled wedding with a circus theme should have an invitation that makes people chomp at the bit for the big day to arrive.

Above right is an example of an invitation suite I designed for clients, Alexis and Sam. Their low-key and relaxed wedding was to take place in the

Bahamas, where they planned a weekend of fun activities for their guests to enjoy. Their invitation expressed that perfectly, not only giving guests the proper information to book travel and pack properly, but priming

no one would know who he was if it wasn’t included. Feel free to make it personal as proper etiquette doesn’t always apply to each situation.

When?

Once again, something you would assume would be second nature, but it’s important to do it properly. Always say when the event will start – not when the music will start. The time on your invitation should be the time your bridal party will begin to walk down the aisle. As a guest, you should always plan to arrive at least 10 minutes prior to the time provided on the invitation. Also, don’t forget to include when your cocktail hour and reception will begin.

Dress Code?

them for all of the fun that was to come!

Providing Pertinent Information

Obviously, one of the most important reasons for having the perfect invitation is to include all of the proper information for your guests. They certainly won’t be tossing it in the trash if it is full of useful details! Below are some of the important things to include in your invitation suite:

Who?

This seems like a bit of a “duh” thing to add, but it is incredibly important to put who the invitation is coming from.

Not only should you include the bride and the groom, but also the parents, if they are helping host the event. Generally, the bride’s parents are the hosts, but if the groom’s parents are helping out, their names should be included as well.

One other thing to think about is to make sure people know who the bride and groom are when they receive their invitation. Maybe the groom always goes by a nickname and

full street address and the city.

If many guests are from out of state, you can include the state as well. There is no need for the zip code; it’s not very appealing on the eyes to have an extra string of numbers on your formal invitation. You can follow the same rules for the reception information.

Feel free to include directions on a separate, but matching card, especially if guests are coming in from out of town or if the route is tricky or may be under construction. To be completely helpful, include directions from the hotel to the synagogue and from the synagogue to the reception. Everyone has GPS nowadays, but they don’t always provide what you would consider the best route.

You may also want to say when dinner will be served because the beginning of the reception is not always the beginning of dinner – you don’t want hungry guests!

Where?

When writing the ceremony location you should include the

Do you expect your guests to arrive in suit and tie? Be sure to tell them! Also, the big one people miss in this department is telling guests your event will be held outdoors. Outdoor weddings require different attire, especially for the ladies, so be sure to let your guests know on the invitation to wear their flats so they don’t sink into the grass and to bring a shawl to keep them warm. Don’t forget to include Plan B if the weather chooses not to cooperate.

Accommodation Information

It is common practice to reserve a block of rooms at a local hotel for your guests. A

separate but matching card included in your invitation suite is the perfect place to provide that information. You can also include information on shuttles if the hotel is providing one to and from your event.

Wedding Website

Have a wedding website that’s full of all sorts of useful information about you, your bridal party and how the whole love affair got started? Feel free to share that with your guests, too! Be sure you’re not using the crazy long link on your invitation suite though – it makes it almost impossible for guests to properly type it into the browser. Use a site like bit.ly to shorten and customize your link.

Remember, the more personal an invitation suite is, the more apparent it will be to the guests that you put your whole heart and soul into the event. Now that you’re armed with this great information on how to make your wedding invitation suite exciting and useful, go on out and create that beautiful invitation your guests will want to show off to their friends! Happy planning! amanda Cursaro is the owner and lead designer of Baci Designer Stationery + Events (bacidesigner.com). This slightly edited excerpt was reprinted with permission from Tracy Osborne and the WeddingLovely.com blog.

20 | January 17, 2014

WEDDINGS

The Jewish Voice

Why a wedding planner?

By Laurie Robinson If you are engaged or in the process of planning the wedding of your dreams, an experienced wedding planner can help in taking the worry and stress out of organizing your special day, thereby allowing you the ability to enjoy the time with your guests. An experienced wedding planner has the expertise to take care of everything from

the most important details to the smallest incidentals, and if requested, is there the day of your wedding to ensure absolute perfection.

It is never too late to meet with a wedding planner, and consultations are generally complimentary. Laurie Robinson, a wedding planner and owner of Event Planning Specialists, LLC, recommends that the best time to begin the planning

process is soon after becoming engaged or as soon as the date is set. According to Robinson, most wedding planners can save couples significant dollars on the costs associated with a wedding, which in most cases will offset the fee for this service. “We’re pretty affordable,” she said. “Our average prices range from $1,000 to $1,500. We negotiate on your behalf, and we get a discount and pass it on to the wedding couple.

Robinson stated that many of today’s wedding couples are more settled in their lives and careers, and often already own or rent a home/apartment. She said that the traditional model whereby the bride’s family is chiefly responsible for planning and paying for the wedding is rare today, and many of the couples she meets with are planning and paying for their own wedding.

“… her job is to choreograph the perfectly memorable wedding.”

Establishing a budget is a critical component in wedding planning. In most cases, Robinson assists in identifying a realistic budget and helping wedding couples/families to stay within the budget.

The planning process begins with identifying the date/time of the ceremony and establishing a timeline for the reception

Nicole Miller · Shoshanna Tibi · Autumn Cashmere Jude Connally · Milly 165 Main Street, East Greenwich 288 Thayer Street, Providence 338C County Road, Barrington

401-398-1199

which includes the cocktail hour, luncheon or dinner and any other related activities prior to or succeeding the wedding (i.e., out of town guest dinner, Sunday brunch, etc.).

Robinson advises to make appointments nine to twelve months before the date of the wedding with potential venues, caterers, photographers, videographers, DJ or band, entertainers, florists, bridal shops (wedding gown, bridesmaid’s dresses, tuxedos), transportation companies to ensure availability. It is at this stage in the process that a wedding planner would be most beneficial in assisting with the appointment setting and in positioning the negotiation process to achieve better-than retail pricing.

Creating a preliminary guest list early will help in determining the venue as well as the budget. Once the guest list is determined, Robinson advises sending out a “Save the Date” to the guests that will definitely be invited. This is especially important to allow out of state guests the opportunity to make appropriate travel arrangements. It is wise to establish a hotel room block to include

with the “Save the Date.” Robinson advises sending out the “Save the Date” at least twelve months prior but no less than six months before.

At least six to eight months before, the invitation should be selected and printed to allow enough time to be addressed and mailed. Ideally wedding invitations should be mailed at least eight weeks before the event takes place.

Once the key components of the wedding preparation are in place, you will be able to focus on honeymoon planning and some of the more creative details such as themes, decorating, linens, uplighting, favors, etc.

Robinson stresses the importance of hiring established professionals versus inexperienced and less costly, freelance professionals. She said that from a reliability standpoint, it is important to hire experienced resources with a proven track record of references and success that can be verified.

It can be difficult for a bride and groom to focus on being the coordinator of their own wedding, and with a wedding planner, the couple can rely on that individual to take care of all of the logistics and details. Robinson said that her job is to choreograph the perfectly memorable wedding.

Note: Event Planning Specialists, LLC, which includes Robinson and two additional staff people, was formed in 2000. Before that, and beginning in 1993, Robinson worked independently in the field under her own name. Contact Event Planning Specialists, LLC, in East Greenwich, at 523-5107 or www.epspecialists.com.

WEDDINGS

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What’s different about gay wedding ceremonies?

Answer: Nothing.

BY: Rabbi Miriam Jerris Nothing! A Secular Humanistic Jewish wedding ceremony rejoices in the love of two individuals regardless of whether they are two persons of the same, or different, genders. The ceremonies that I celebrate focus on the two people pledging their love. They are personal and individual. They reflect the backgrounds of the participants by incorporating rituals or symbols from their respective cultural or religious upbringings.

However, while we incorporate symbols from religious traditions, the focus in a humanistic or secular ceremony is on the human aspects of their union rather than on any particular religion.

As a Secular Humanistic rabbi who is also intermarried, I feel it is my obligation to serve the needs of Jews and their partners by performing intermarriages and incorporating cultural traditions from each of the couple’s backgrounds. I felt this way before I was a rabbi and before I was intermarried.

It is my passion to honor individuals and my love of my Jewish heritage that led me to this commitment.

In preparing for a wedding ceremony, I share sample materials with the couple. They choose the symbols or traditions from their cultural or religious backgrounds that they wish to include in their ceremony. In a typical Jewish-Christian gay wedding ceremony, you may find a chuppah, or wedding canopy, the drinking of wine, a unity candle, readings, and a breaking of the glass. I explain the significance, symbolism, and sometimes the origins of the traditions. My goal is to be warm and inclusive so that all the participants and observers feel engaged by and connected to the experience.

When I began working with intermarried couples more than eighteen years ago, I remember how strongly I felt about what I was doing. There were so few Jewish clergy willing to embrace the couple for who they were rather than what they were. I also felt that I was marrying people, not labels.

I knew that what I was doing mattered to the couple and to their families. Participating in ceremonies that celebrate gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender unions generates, in some circles, the same type of reaction today. I know that I am doing something that is very much appreciated.

When creating the wedding ceremonies for same-sex couples, we change the language that refers to the two individuals getting married from wife and husband to spouse or partner. Some couples prefer not to use the word marriage, so I may say life-long partnership or union.

Consistent with my commitment to honest expression, I have been asked by some couples to be explicit about how this ceremony may be different from heterosexual ceremonies.

I have written the following, which allows public recognition of their choice: “In choosing to come together publicly and to include all of us in this special celebration, Chris and Brian have honored us. The fact that so many of you are here to support them is a testament that the world is becoming a more ethical and loving place. This ceremony is a ritual with themes of hope, openness, honoring differences, trust, acceptance, and the power of true love.”

At certain times, something unique to the situation is called for. Some couples choose to make a more political statement

about their same-sex choice in their ceremony. When that happens, I am happy to serve as the vehicle by which they can express their convictions and beliefs. I wrote this to reflect the position of one couple, and many others have also chosen to include it in their ceremony, “Brian and Chris see this ceremony and their marriage as gay men as a powerful example and model for all relationships in this time and for the future. I am present here today as clergy to give public acknowledgment of their choice and to provide them with my loving support.

I hope that this ceremony validates what is possible and real today, and what will be acknowledged and legal someday

in the near future.”

I believe that my commitment to the couple and their choice is significant. I offer an official, albeit not legal, recognition of their union and partnership.

I like my support to be very personal and human. I often continue with something like the following: “This is also an emotional moment for me because I am passionate about my work, the most significant part of which is participating in ceremonies that may make other people cranky. My involvement with the gay/lesbian/bisexual/ transgender community grows out of my connection with the intercultural, interracial, and interfaith community. I simply

enjoy being able to say to the world, ‘every relationship deserves to be celebrated, and I’m going to be on the front lines celebrating.’”

I participate in all types of wedding ceremonies because I believe that all relationships of love deserve to be celebrated and because I do hope that my involvement validates what is possible and real today and will be legal someday in the future.

Note: Same-sex marriage became legal in Rhode Island on August 1, 2013.

This article originally appeared on InterfaithFamily. com.

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The Jewish Voice

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BUSINESS

extended to the news of any Jewish child who had gone missing.

The news that Caleb had been found spread just as quickly as the news of his disappearance.

Jewish communities everywhere breathed a collective sigh of relief that this story has a happy ending. Hearing Caleb is safely back with his family should be more than enough for us to close this story out, but remarkably, most people are not satisfied.

“What happened?” you saw people post online moments after the news of his being found was announced. Did he run away from home? Who found him and how did he make his way to New York City? What will his parents say to him when they first see him? Will he be in trouble?

Somehow, people feel entitled to know the answers to these questions and that they deserve an explanation of what happened.

But the truth is – it is absolutely none of our business!

Caleb Jacoby’s disappearance was not some episode of a reality TV show. It was a horrific ordeal for a wonderful family who were tortured for four days not knowing where their precious son was and what his fate would be. We cannot imagine the acute pain, anguish, fear, worry or doubt they were forced to endure. Though we all were moved by their pain and offered our prayers, ultimately, this is their story and their experience.

The answer to the question of what happened belongs to them and them alone. It is absolutely

Progeria sufferer Sam Berns with New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft.

Sam Berns, a public face of rare aging disease, dies at 17 BOSTON (JTA) — A Bostonarea Jewish teen whose fight against a rare genetic disease that causes accelerated aging was chronicled in an Academy Award-contending documentary has died.

Sam Berns of Foxborough, Mass., died Friday after a lifelong battle with progeria. He was 17, three years older than the typical life expectancy for children with the disease.

Sam came into the public eye through the documentary film “Life According to Sam,” which was broadcast last October on HBO. The film is on the shortlist for an Oscar nomination. It was voted best documentary at the 2013 Boston Jewish Film Festival and has been screened at Jewish film festivals across the country.

Robert Kraft, a philanthropist who supports numerous Jewish causes and is owner of the New England Patriots, took a personal interest in Sam, an avid sports fan who was scheduled to serve as honorary captain at Saturday night’s New England Patriots playoff game. Instead, a moment of silence was held in his memory.

“I loved Sam Berns and am richer for having known him,” Kraft said.

In October, prior to the HBO broadcast, Kraft made a $500,000 matching donation to the Progeria Research Foundation to further its hunt for treatment and a cure. The foundation was started in 1999 by Sam’s parents, Leslie Gordon and Scott Berns, both doctors, after Sam, then a toddler, was diagnosed with the condition.

The foundation’s research team made quick progress in isolating the gene that causes the condition and has since developed a drug that has prolonged the lives of children such as Sam. Rabbi Harold Kushner lost his son Aaron to progeria, prompting him to write the bestselling book “When Bad Things Happen To Good People.”

In a statement confirming Sam’s death last Friday, the Progeria Foundation wrote, “The entire PRF community mourns the loss of this remarkable young man who not only inspired PRF’s creation, but also touched millions of people worldwide.”

none of our business, and we are not entitled to find out, no matter how desperately curious we may be.

If there is something we can learn from what happened to better protect our children, we can be confident the family will let us know. If they choose to go public with what happened, that is certainly their prerogative.

In the meantime – he was missing and now he is safe is all that we need to know, if our concern was really about him. In fact, being satisfied with knowing he is OK versus expressing a desire to find out exactly what happened reveals whether this issue was really about Caleb or more about us and our voyeuristic spectatorship all along. If we genuinely care about someone who was missing, all we need to know is they are now safe and healthy.

The craving for salacious details and the appetite to know the entire story emanates from a terribly unhealthy sense of nosiness, inquisitiveness and our insatiable need to be in-the-know.

This phenomenon expresses itself in many scenarios. When some hear about a couple getting divorced, their first response is “What happened?” as if they are entitled to a report about the most personal and private details of a couple, and often children, going through a difficult time. Many pay a shiva call and feel a need to ask, “How did he or she die?” Certainly the mourner is free to volunteer the cause of death if they like, but is it really our business and do we truly need to know? When we ask, “Why did he lose his job?”

Rabbi Efrem Goldberg or “Why did they break their engagement?” or “Why is she still single?” are we asking because we care about them, or is finding out somehow satisfying something in ourselves?

For some, the “need to know” stems from a sense of “information is power.” Information is social currency and the more we know, the richer and more powerful we are. For others, the “need to know” stems from an inability to live with tension or mystery. And yet, for others, the “need to know” is similar to whatever draws us to slow down and look at the accident on the highway even though it has nothing to do with us at all and only creates traffic for others.

The Torah places great value on people’s right to privacy. Jewish law demands that we conduct ourselves with the presumption that all that we are told even in pedestrian conversation is to

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be held in confidence unless it is explicitly articulated that we are free to repeat what we heard.

The laws of hezek re’iyah forbid a person from looking into his or her neighbor’s property in a way that violates their privacy.

We are instructed not to speak lashon ha’rah or rechilus and spread gossip, even if the information is absolutely true and entirely accurate. The Talmud (Bava Metzia 23b) goes so far as to tell us that we are permitted to distort the truth in circumstances that someone is prying for information that is none of their business and that they are not entitled to have.

Soon after Caleb was found, a member of our Shul emailed me the following: “Baruch Hashem.

This is one time when we don’t need details. We need to follow up with thanks to the Almighty.

The experience has ended positively for Caleb and his family and has created an increased sense of oneness and faith among Jews.” I couldn’t agree with her more. The greatest respect we can show the Jacobys now is to give them the privacy they deserve as they are undoubtedly continuing to go through a difficult time.

Let’s make this unfortunate episode productive and meaningful by channeling our “need to know” into a need to thank Hashem that Caleb is alright.

Anything more than that is simply none of our business.

Rabbi Efrem Goldberg is the Senior Rabbi of the Boca Raton Synagogue (BRS), the largest Orthodox Synagogue in the Southeast United States.

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The Jewish Voice

ISRAEL | NATION

Snowden revelations boost calls for Pollard’s release

By Ben Sales

Janet Yellen

Senate confirms Yellen as Fed chairwoman WASHINGTON (JTA) – The Senate confirmed Janet Yellen as chairwoman of the Federal Reserve, making her the first woman and the third consecutive Jewish top U.S. government banker. Yellen was confirmed in a 56-26 vote on Monday.

January 6. She succeeds Ben Bernanke, who followed Alan Greenspan in 2006.

Yellen, 67, has been vicechairwoman of the Federal Reserve since 2010. She has pledged to continue Bernanke’s commitment to transparency and is noted for her emphasis on diminishing unemployment over tackling inflation.

“As one of our nation’s most respected economists and a leading voice at the Fed for

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more than a decade – and Vice Chair for the past three years – Janet helped pull our economy out of recession and put us on the path of steady growth,” President Obama said in a statement. “Janet is committed to the Fed’s dual mandate of keeping inflation in check while also addressing our most important economic challenge by reducing unemployment and creating jobs.”

According to media reports, a top contender to replace her in the vice chairman’s post is Stanley Fischer, a former World Bank chief economist who from 2005 to 2013 was governor of the Bank of Israel. Fischer holds dual Israel-U.S. citizenship.

MOTHER’S CIRCLE

the curriculum of the class, saying that she still returns to it once in a while. Metzger took the course to be prepared for the time when her daughter Zoe starts to ask complicated questions. She now feels ready to answer them.

Cimmi Cumes and her son Isaak, as well as Anya Davis and her sons Ilan and William, are recent transplants to RI. The two women appreciated the sense of community and stability the Alliance JCC and the Mothers Circle offered. Cumes wasn’t raised religious; ever since she converted to her husband’s faith seven years ago, she had been eager to learn more about it. Davis had agreed to raise the children Jewish, so she felt that she should take advantage of the program that resonated with her situation.

She said, “So much Judaism is practiced at home that if you don’t know how to do it, you’re in trouble.”

Davis’ husband is baffled at the effort involved, but happy she’s following through with the commitment. Davis keeps recalling Haspel’s advice to encourage herself. During the course, Haspel urged the women to take the process one step

at a time and do the best they can. Davis dedicates herself because she has always been drawn to the aspects of Judaism that she is finally engaging in; they include mindfulness, prayers of gratitude, moments of rest and opportunities to do good deeds.

Maria Ross also appreciated the chance to learn more about Judaism. Brought up Catholic, she never related to the faith.

When her son Noah was born, she and her husband Jarred wanted to raise him with spirituality. They chose the husband’s faith because “Reform Judaism is more accepting of interfaith marriages.” Ross really benefitted from the course’s guidance, saying, “I loved it. He [Jarred] didn’t know too much about some of the holidays.”

Her husband concedes, saying he appreciates the help the Mothers Circle has provided and that he’s proud of Ross’ initiative to learn. He praises his wife’s devotion, “It doesn’t surprise me – she usually jumps in with both feet.”

If any readers would like to jump in too, they can contact Kit Haspel at 401-421-4111, ext.

184 or at khaspel@jewishallianceri.org.

TEL AVIV (JTA) – The (recent) disclosure that American intelligence spied on former Israeli prime ministers has given new momentum to the effort to secure a pardon for convicted spy Jonathan Pollard.

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu and several leading Members of Knesset have called in recent days for Pollard’s release following reports that documents leaked by former defense contractor Edward Snowden showed U.S. intelligence had targeted the email addresses of Ehud Barak and Ehud Olmert.

Pollard’s case “isn’t disconnected from the U.S. spying on Israel,” Nachman Shai, the co-chair of the Knesset caucus to free Pollard, told JTA. “It turns out, it’s part of life. And what he did is a part of life.”

Knesset Speaker Yuli Edelstein accused the United States of “hypocrisy” for holding Pollard, who as a civilian U.S. Navy analyst spied on the United States for Israel, even as it spied on Israeli leaders.

Transportation Minister Yisrael Katz said he wants the Israeli government to demand Pollard’s release and insist the United States cease its espionage operations in Israel. And opposition leader Isaac Herzog said Pollard’s punishment “has long passed the limits of sensibility.”

“We hope that the conditions will be created that will enable us to bring Jonathan home,” Netanyahu said Sunday at the Israeli Cabinet’s weekly meet-

ing. “This is neither conditional on, nor related to, recent events, even though we have given our opinion on these developments.”

When Pollard’s crimes first came to light in the mid-1980s, his activities seemed like a major act of betrayal given the close alliance between Israel and the United States.

But the Snowden revelations show that spying by the United States and Israel was a twoway affair, prompting a new round of calls for the release of Pollard.

Support for freeing Pollard represents a rare point of consensus in Israeli politics, with 100 Knesset members among the 120 signing a letter asking Obama to release Pollard, according to Shai. Eighty members signed a similar letter last year.

But Ronen Bergman, an expert on Israeli intelligence who is writing a history of Israel’s spy agencies, says Israeli pressure is unlikely to convince President Obama to free Pollard in the short term.

“I’m quite positive that it won’t happen tomorrow because otherwise it will look as if the president of the United States accepts the claim that following the recent revelations from Edward Snowden, he should parole Jonathan Pollard,” Bergman told JTA. “But once the Americans were caught with their hands in the cookie jar, it paints the Pollard issue in a different color.”

The clamor for Pollard’s release has grown steadily over the past two years, with the late U.S. Sen. Arlen Specter,

former Attorney General Michael Mukasey and former Secretary of State George Shultz expressing their support.

Jewish Agency for Israel Chairman Natan Sharansky, a vocal advocate for Pollard’s release who raised the issue last month in his speech to the General Assembly of the Jewish Federations of North America, told JTA that American calls for the release of Pollard hold more sway than Israeli advocacy.

“What really matters is what American public opinion and American professionals and the American Jewish community feel,” Sharansky said. “I want to be cautious, but I think we passed a checkpoint. Now we don’t see people thinking [Pollard’s release] is unthinkable.”

Supporters of Pollard have long argued that his three decades of incarceration for spying on an ally is excessive.

Revelations of American espionage may strengthen the rhetorical argument on Pollard’s behalf, they say, but the merits of the case for release stand on their own.

“Without any connection to the recent news, there’s no question that the time has already come when the Israeli public and senior officials want this tragedy to come to an end,” said Adi Ginsburg, a spokesperson for the advocacy group Justice for Jonathan Pollard. “American justice and shared values between the two countries, like justice and mercy, necessitate Pollard’s freedom.”

Israelis snag top prizes at National Jewish Book Awards

NEW YORK (JTA) – Authors Yossi Klein Halevi, Rabbi Jonathan Sacks and Ari Shavit were among the winners of the 2013 National Jewish Book Awards.

Halevi, a longtime Israeli journalist, took the top prize, the Everett Family Foundation Jewish Book of the Year Award, for “Like Dreamers,” which tells the history of Israel through the personal experiences over decades of a handful of paratroopers who helped capture the Old City of Jerusalem in the 1967 Six-Day War. Sacks, the former British chief rabbi, won in the category of modern Jewish thought and experience for “The Koren Pesach Machzor.”

Shavit, a journalist for Israel’s daily Haaretz, won in the history category for “My Promised Land: The triumph

and Tragedy of Israel,” a book of reflections on Israel’s complicated history.

Awarded annually by the Jewish Book Council, the awards are in their 63rd iteration. This year’s crop announced Wednesday included a notable number of foreign winners.

The award for fiction went to Israeli writer Amos Oz for “Between Friends,” which was translated into English

by Sondra Silverston. Hebrew University professor Moshe Halbertal won the Nahum M. Sarna Memorial Award for Scholarship for “Maimonides: Life and Thought.”

Richard Breitman and Allan Lichtman’s “FDR and the Jews” won the American Jewish Studies Celebrate 350 Award. Phyllis Chesler won in the category for biography or memoir for “An American

Bride in Kabul: A Memoir.”

Michal Smart and Barbara Ashkenas’s book “Kaddish: Women’s Voices” won in the category of contemporary Jewish practice.

In children and young adult literature, the winner was “The War Within These Walls,” written by Aline Sax, illustrated by Caryl Strzelecki and translated by Laura Watkinson. The top prize for illustrated children’s book went to “Hanukkah Bear” by Eric A. Kimmel and illustrated by Mike Wohnoutka.

A full list of the awardees and runners-up is available at the Jewish Book Council website.

The awards will be presented at a ceremony on March 5 at the Center for Jewish History in New York. The event is free and open to the public.

COMMUNITY

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The Union for Reform Judaism’s 72 Biennial a memorable experience Rhode Islanders join 5,000 Jews for five days of connecting, camaraderie and community

By Irina Missiuro IMissiuro@jewishallianceri.org SAN DIEGO, CA: On December 12, 2013, nearly 5,000 Jews gathered in San Diego for the Union for Reform Judaism’s 72 Biennial, a conference that lasted through December 16. While the event involved important discussions, bold decisions and drastic changes, the attendees still managed to have the time of their lives. Rabbi Andrew Klein, of Temple Habonim in Barrington, highly enjoyed his time at the conference: “I studied with some of the greatest teachers of our time, I reconnected with colleagues … and I met new people from all over North America.” Despite enormous challenges facing the Reform movement, – Rabbi Rick Jacobs, the president of the URJ, compared them to giant waves that “will enable us to go faster and further than ever before” if we ride them with skill – the mood at the conference was hopeful and the attitude positive.

While the Biennial addressed various concerns Reform synagogues are encountering, the main issue on hand was diminishing attendance. Conference attendees discussed possible ways to encourage young Jewish professionals to become members. Yes, synagogues can enhance their programming and offer outstanding incentives, but that won’t help if the target audience is unaware about what it is missing. Jacobs announced that the URJ had sold half its Manhattan office space to invest $1 million in attracting young people. Strategies, such as engaging youth through developing Reform summer camps and expanding the National Federation of Temple Youth, are in place to reinvigorate the movement. Lindsay Tarnof, Youth Advisor and member of Temple Habonim, appreciated the focus on youth engagement and education at the conference.

During the biennial, Jacobs pointed out that Reform Jews were able to reverse the movement’s decline in the 1930s by adapting to the circumstances and repositioning Reform Judaism to accept traditional Jewish practice and Zionism.

Who’s to say that the same approach can’t be used again? Not the Biennial organizers, who had invited leaders outside the movement to brainstorm ideas.

Reform Jews paid attention to what a Conservative rabbi, an Orthodox rabbi and a professor of education had to say on the matter. The only movement missing was Chabad-Lubavitch, a source of frustration for many conference attendees, who find that they are forced to compete

Attendees included community members from Temple Beth-El, Temple Habonim and Temple Sinai. with Chabad’s free or more affordable worship options. On a positive note, the consensus reached at the Biennial was that young people are eager to join an evolving movement, not one that is unchanging and inflexible.

An overhaul is needed not only for the image of the movement, but also for the organization that represents it. In addition to downsizing the headquarters, Steve Sacks, the chairman of URJ’s board, suggested a more transparent and affordable dues payment. Outside funding and partnerships will become catalysts to raising revenue. The theory is already put into practice. The Ruderman Family Foundation is donating $600,000 over the next three years to make Reform synagogues friendly to people with disabilities. Also, the Harold Grinspoon Foundation is committing $900,000 over the next five years to bring PJ Library to those communities that would benefit from a monthly delivery of free Jewish books. These initiatives will add to the ones already in place – funding from the Jim Joseph Foundation, the

Marcus Foundation and the Crown Family Philanthropies will continue to strengthen the movement. To reinforce the focus on the new generation, most of URJ’s youth-programming professionals are moving to the Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion in Manhattan.

Another hot topic of conversation at the Biennial was the relationship between Israel and the Diaspora. In addition to Torah Study and introspection, Jerry Katz, a Temple Habonim member, chose to attend sessions that focused on “geopolitical issues concerning Israel.” Many arguments were heard toward inclusion of Israelis in the Reform movement and Israel’s welcome to American Jews. Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said via satellite, “While the Wall may be in Israel, it belongs to all of you.” Jacobs reiterated the point, “The bonds that link Israel and the Diaspora are mutually strengthening, and must grow even deeper.”Jacobs took his advocacy for equality at the Kotel even further, arguing for the need to demand equality

“in rabbinical courts, under the bridal canopy, at funerals, in conversions, in the founding and funding of our congregations.”

In the spirit of the movement’s renaissance, Jacobs encouraged the attendees to show “audacious hospitality” by welcoming intermarried couples and non-practicing Jews. Continuing with the theme of diversity and inclusion, the sessions enlightened attendees about the plight of foreign Jews in need of shelter. John Catania, Temple Beth-El Brotherhood President, shares that the session he found especially interesting “was The Jewish Communities in Crisis, focusing on Iranian Jews struggling to leave their homeland seeking religious freedom.”

In addition to educating attendees about the importance of embracing differences, URJ demonstrated that those who stand for equality are celebrated. Anat Hoffman, Israel Reli-

gious Action Center Executive Director and Women of the Wall Chairwoman, received the Women for Reform Judaism’s Jane Evans Social Justice Award for her activism and support of religious pluralism and women’s rights in Israel.

Adam Mastoon, a Temple Habonim member and a photographer from Barrington, was impressed by the diversity represented at the Biennial and by the movement’s inclusion of atypical Jews.

Buchdahl led an innovative Shabbat service that included dancing, prose reading and “Storahtelling” in addition to the usual singing. Linda Silverman Levine, educator at Temple Habonim, calls the Friday service “the most powerful, emotional, spiritual service I will ever participate in.” She emphasizes, “Never have I been so moved in worship.” Leslie biennial | 27

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War on Poverty

By Marty Cooper On January 8, the Rhode Island General Assembly met for the first full day of its 2014 legislative session. The General Assembly will have to look at tough issues that will undoubtedly have an impact on its people. Of particular importance will be proposed legislation affecting human services and the State’s vulnerable populations.

January 8 is a particularly evocative date for it also marked the 50th Anniversary of the War on Poverty announced by President Lyndon Baines Johnson during his 1964 State of the Union Address.

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On that same day, five decades later, the Rhode Island Interfaith Coalition to Reduce Poverty held its 6th annual Vigil at the Statehouse Rotunda.

The Vigil began with a march of faith leaders, representatives of most of Rhode Island’s religious c om mu n it ie s, walking from Gloria Dei Lutheran Church to the Statehouse.

During the course of the vigil, the name of each elected official

biennial

Lorber, President of Temple Habonim, echoes that sentiment, “I was moved to tears.” Such daring Shabbat illustrates the movement’s transformation from what it was just fifty years ago. Buchdal’s guitar strumming, the audience’s head bobbing and Jacobs’ purple tallis, swaying to music, do bring to mind the age of the hippies rather than the Germanic Reform Judaism of the last century.

Describing his exit from Shabbat Services, Alan Moskoff, a Vice President of Men of Reform Judaism, says, “As we reached the escalator, we could hear other groups singing as they had arrived at our destination, and you could see and hear a sea of people on the first floor singing. A truly magical moment. I could imagine myself

in another place many years ago.” Leslie Katz, of Temple Habonim, also shares that the most meaningful part of her “whole Biennial experience was the worship.”

Morning services, including Yoga Shalom: A Shacharit Embodiment of Prayer, a visual service sans prayerbook and an Israeli pop music and poetry service, solidified the urge to embrace novelty (or rather to return to the audience’s youth?). The Reform movement seems to have figured out how to maintain the interest of its core believers and the strategy is working. Now that hippies have transformed into hipsters, maybe the children of these attendees will be just as drawn to the new and improved ways of Reform Judaism?

of our state was called out by a faith leader who urged each official to govern with compassion and wisdom.

The Coalition asked the General Assembly to pass an ethical budget that will provide decent, safe and affordable housing, adequate food and nutrition, equal access to affordable health care, equal and quality education for all and decent

work with an adequate wage for every resident of Rhode Island.

Fifty years ago, President Johnson laid the foundation for reducing poverty throughout our country by creating Head Start, VISTA (Volunteers in Service to America), Food Stamps and the Job Corps. For 50 years, these programs have been updated and revised, continuing to provide a safety net for Americans striving to pull themselves and their families out of poverty. To the distress of the Rhode Island Interfaith Coalition to Reduce Poverty, significant cuts in these programs, most notably Head Start and SNAP (the newest iteration

of the Food Stamp program), have already been legislated on a federal level and are affecting Rhode Island families.

Today, Rhode Island is still feeling the effects of the recent Great Recession. The 2012 poverty rate in Rhode Island was 13.7% or approximately 139,000 people. This does not include the individuals living at “near poverty” (defined as twice the federal poverty level), which poverty | 28

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Seniors

The Jewish Voice

A new year but an old, sectarian calendar The newly-placed wall calendar in the dentist’s waiting room in Providence declares the year to be 2014; but if one reckons by the Hebrew calendar, the year is 5774; by the Mayan calendar, 5133; by the Buddhist c a l e n d a r, 2558; by the old Imperial Roman (Julian) calendar, 2,767; and by the Islamic calOf Science endar, 1434. r l y, & Society theC l e ayear’s numeric number on Stanley m. any given Aronson, M.D. calendar is no more objectively valid than another calendar’s number. And so, for example, if the founder of one’s religion had been Elvis Presley, then this new Presleyan year would be a modest 79.

Each of the many systems by which the years are numbered begins its first day coincident with some solemn religious event, divine birth or royal edict; and hence, each calendar serves a particular ethnic or sectarian constituency. Great confusion, therefore, awaits diplomats, world travelers and those engaged in international commerce if there is no universal calendar. Accordingly, most of the world, by common

consent, now employs the Gregorian calendar; but had Islam conquered Europe in the 16th century, today’s year would likely be 1424. As with many established societal customs such as language, the choices are made by the victors.

To fill its purposes, a global calendar must achieve more than universal acceptance. It must also be compliant with certain objective criteria such as the timing of the solstices and equinoxes, and the length of the year. The universal calendar must be aligned with the heavens as well as with popular opinion.

The Julian calendar, established in 45 B.C.E. by Julius Caesar, was impressed by fiat upon the far-reaching Roman Empire. It served most of the western world as a reasonable approximation of the true solar year. Increasingly, though, the discrepancies between Julian time and real time increased, leading to deep concerns that calendar-oriented religious observances, particularly Easter, were departing substantially from their originally assigned dates. It then became necessary, at yearly intervals, to delete or intercalate days into the Julian calendar to make it concordant with the astronomer’s calendar. But as long as there was only one church supervising the destinies of the Western nations, the Julian calendar, with its many errors, prevailed.

The Reformation, however, ended the fragile religious unity of Western Europe; and with it, the capacity of one authority, the Vatican, to determine the

“The year’s numeric number on any given calendar is no more objectively valid than another calendar’s number.” structure of the calendar. The Council of Trent (1545-1563) represented the Church’s response to the spread of the Protestant sects; but the Council also advocated that the flawed Julian calendar be replaced.

Pope Gregory XIII (1502-1585) convened a commission expressly to devise a new calendar. Three men were ultimately

from page 6

involved in its implementation.

Pope Gregory (whose name was given to the new calendar), Christopher Clavius, a brilliant Jesuit mathematician, and a Calabrian physician, Aloysius Lilius, of unknown ethnic background.

It was Lilius’ plan that was finally adopted. It declared that the year consist of 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes and 12 secondsAnd to accommodate for accumulating annual differences, an extra day (the leap day) should be added every four years. The Lilius formula, with some additional fine-tuning, reduced the calendric discrepancy to but one day in 3,300 years.

The Lilius plan also stipulated that the year begin on January 1 rather than March 1. And the new calendar, the Gregorian, was officially implemented by papal bull on February 24, 1582.

BULLYING

NY, began her presentation by saying, “We’re all trying to make our world better for our children and our children’s children.” She defined bullying as: aggressive behavior that is hurtful, intentional, threating and persistent. She went on to say, “I am totally obsessed with the bullying epidemic that plagues our society. I did not set out to be the Anti-Bullying Novelist. My mission is to continue speaking about bullying until schools and camps are a safer place for everyone.”

Wolf said that she uses her books to point out bullying in our society, particularly in our schools and at camps, where she witnessed it firsthand. Her books are used as a springboard for conversation on the subject.

“CAMP” is a coming-of-age story, Wolf’s first novel about bullying. Amy, the main character of the story, comes from a troubled, unbearable home.

She is about to go to camp for her first time. Amy is subjected to a cruel and humiliating initiation followed by bullying, which is led by a senior camper.

“Danny’s Mom” begins with a fatal tragedy. Beth, a guidance counselor and the main character of the novel, recently lost her son in a car accident. Upon returning to Meadow Brook High School, she is confronted

with bullying of epidemic proportions.

“I speak,” said Wolf, “for the victims of those children who took their lives because they could not bear any more bullying and were driven to suicide.”

During the presentation Wolf provided startling statics about bullying: • 1 out of 4 teens is bullied; • 6 out of 10 kids with special needs are bullied; • 9 out of 10 LGBT students are harassed and bullied; • children with food allergies are now being bullied.

She then told attendees how they can significantly help to reduce bullying: • Never judge or blame your child even if he/she is the bully.

• Always stay calm.

• Never encourage your child to fight back.

• Contact the school or the organization where the incident(s) is (are) occurring.

• Keep a log of incidents which have occurred.

• Make anti-bullying an ongoing conversation at home.

• Assure children they can trust you and can come to you to discuss anything.

• Never be a bystander; be an “up-stander” and speak up.

• Never give bullies an audience.

• Be a friend to the person

POVERTY

from page 27 was over 30%.

As Rhode Islanders, we know the recession is not over. Many of us still feel its effects, as do our friends and extended families. It is imperative that Rhode Island’s elected officials own up to their responsibilities to provide a reliable safety net for our state’s most vulnerable residents and to put the training

and education into the hands of those able to pull themselves out of poverty.

Every one of the faith leaders participating in the January 8 Vigil will be bearing witness to the theological principle common to us all: that our religious traditions compel us to work toward a just society where everyone has equal access to ef-

For almost two succeeding centuries, the Protestant nations, including Britain’s American colonies, rejected the new calendar as heresy with prolonged riots in many European cities as well as confusion amongst the contemporary historians: George Washington’s birthday is declared as two separate dates by the Julian (February 11, 1731) and Gregorian (February 22, 1731) calendars.

The Gregorian calendar was finally accepted in the 18th century, despite continuing peasant protests. Japan accepted the Gregorian calendar in 1873, China in 1912 (coincident with the Sun Yat Sen revolution) and Russia in 1917 (coincident with the Bolshevik revolution). Some members of Congress are still debating the issue.

Stanley M. Aronson, M.D., may be reached at smamd@cox. net.

being bullied.

Elaine Wolf’s two books are available at the Jewish Alliance. “CAMP” can be purchased at a special price of $10.00 (retail price is $16.95), and “Danny’s Mom” can be purchased for $15.00 (retail price is $24.95).

Barrington High School exchange student Lars Umanski to perform Sixteen year-old Lars Umanski is a foreign exchange student living in Barrington and attending Barrington High School as a junior. On Sunday, January 26 at 3 pm he will give a concert which will include popular music familiar to us all, as well as Jewish songs in Yiddish, Hebrew and Russian. The performance will be held at Temple Habonim, 165 New Meadow Road in Barrington.

Originally from the Ukraine, Lars lived in a small town near Dortmund, Germany. His passion is music and singing, and has had roles in productions at BHS during his stay in Rhode Island.

The concert is free and open to the community. For more information, call 245-6536. fective education, nourishing food, safe, adequate housing and a responsive healthcare system.

Marty Cooper (mcooper@jewishallianceri.org) is the community relations director at the Jewish Alliance.

seniors

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January 17, 2014 |

Remember the Past

From the archives of the Rhode Island Jewish Historical Association

The Jewish Voice Staff

Anne Sherman shows off the Bojar’s wicker trunk in the RIJHRI office

The trunk in the office

By Anne Sherman Vintage steamer trunks come in many sizes and shapes. They may be made of metal or wood or rattan. Just look on eBay and you will see the variety.

Depending on their dimensions or appearance, they may have a second life as a coffee table, storage space or just an interesting addition to a room’s décor.

Wicker trunks or chests were especially popular among the early immigrants to this country. They were light, strong and could be locked to protect the contents. The Rhode Island Jewish Historical Association is the happy recipient of one such wicker steamer trunk. It is the subject of many a puzzled look. What is it – a large picnic basket? What is it doing in our cramped offices? Where did it come from?

In the spring of 1914, shortly before the assassination of the Archduke Franz Ferdinand and his wife Sophie in Sarajevo and the outbreak of World War I, a young Jewish family boarded an ocean liner in the German port of Bremen. Leo and Amelia Bojar and their infant son William left their home in Lodz, Poland, to begin a new life in the goldine medine (the golden land), the United States.

Their necessities, their belongings, all they could take with them, were packed in a wicker steamer trunk.

The Bojars sailed aboard the S/S Barbarosa, a ship owned

by North German Lloyd Co. The liner could accommodate 114 passengers in first class, 175 and 252 in second and third class, respectively, and 1832 in steerage. That last figure boggles the mind. What accommodations the Bojars enjoyed we do not know. Most immigrants came by steerage, packed in the hold of a ship with meager sanitary facilities available. Their steamer trunks would also have had to include food for the trip across the Atlantic Ocean.

There were no dining rooms in steerage.

The Bojars lived for a few years in New York and then moved to Providence where Leo founded the Bojar Company, a jewelry manufacturer, in 1919.

The company closed in 1996.

The trunk remained in the possession of three generations of the Bojar family. In March 2001, David Bojar donated it to Rhode Island Jewish Historical Association.

We are indebted to the former archivist of RIJHA, our dear friend, the late Eleanor F. Horvitz, who provided the provenance of the trunk. Originally, according to one of her notes, the trunk was supposed to be a star in the Heritage Harbor Museum Exhibit “Cultural Crossroads.” Eleanor had prepared blurbs to accompany it and a photo of the S/S Barbarosa in anticipation of the trunk’s starring role.

The wicker trunk remains in our office, a reminder of a dif-

ferent era, of generations that came before. Next time you plan a trip and complain about airline restrictions on baggage limits, think about packing your worldly goods in a trunk 25 inches high by 25 inches wide by 42 inches long in order to embark on a journey to a new life in a strange, unknown country without the benefit of a credit card.

Anne Sherman is the office manager of the Rhode Island Jewish Historical Association.

To comment about this or any Rhode Island Jewish Historical Association article, email info@rijha.org.

Visit us online at:

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community

The Jewish Voice

Highridge – a swim and tennis club with family atmosphere

By Wendy Riordan Special to The Jewish Voice Whenever I heard the words “Swim and Tennis Club,” I conjured visions of men in fluffy robes smoking cigars and glamorous women in pointy sunglasses with excessive suntan lotion, circa 1950. So, two summers ago when friends suggested my family join the Highridge Swim and Tennis Club, I was apprehensive.

It sounded like a great idea, but did we have the money or the persona to fit the stereotype in my mind?

Soon after my family joined Highridge, all my preconceived notions vanished completely.

First of all, the club has an overwhelming family feel. No, the members are not all related and the families are different styles, colors, shapes and sizes – not fluffy robed men and glamour gals, thank goodness!

From the moment you walk in, you are greeted with smiles.

Adults have an eye on everyone’s children playing and swimming nearby. By the end of that first summer, you have new friends with whom you stay in contact throughout the winter. It is truly an intimate atmosphere – caring members and staff that comprise the Highridge family.

If I wasn’t immediately won over by the friendliness of the

place (which I was), the amenities that Highridge offers were surely going to draw me in (which they did!). The pool itself is a great size with comfortable chairs all along the perimeter. Lifeguards are there at all times. There are swimming lessons with qualified staff and a swim team that children can join; they compete in an All-Pool Swim Meet which is an incredible experience!

There is also a huge field with a basketball court, volleyball court, jungle gym, swings, toddler playground, toddler wading pool, shuffleboard and a new horseshoe pit. The staff supervises organized games in the field and the pool throughout the day. And then there is the tennis!

Tennis lessons and clinics are included in the membership fee and tennis is run by knowledgeable tennis pros.

I am sure most swim and tennis clubs offer many of these same amenities. What makes Highridge different? Along with the family friendliness comes an informal atmosphere. Want to buy lunch or dinner? The snack bar has lots of choices. Want to

pack a lunch or dinner? Bring your cooler and eat at any of the canopied tables or picnic tables.

Want to grill for dinner? Bring your food and let the staff know when you are ready for them to light a grill. Want to bring friends? Invite guests for a small fee at the front door. Want to have a party? Rent the tent area or picnic area and partygoers can cook, swim and play all day long.

There are many fun events planned throughout the summer. Bingo nights, movie nights, Highridge sleepovers, dinners, tennis socials, Fourth of July cookout and the annual Highridge Olympic games are just some examples. Families bond as they laugh and relax while watching the children having a grand ol’ time!

So banish the thoughts of fluffy robes and pointy sunglasses, and come join the family!

For more information: Call 334-2610 or visit info@highridgeswimandtennis.com.

Note: Wendy Riordan is a member of the board of Highridge Swim and Tennis Club.

The Jewish Voice Staff

Careful does it around irreplaceable historical items in the RI Jewish Historical Association office

Let there be … lights As part of the overall plan to improve accessibility and modernize the Dwares JCC facility (see Donald and Bonnie Dwares Donate $1M to Alliance JCC, The Jewish Voice, Sept. 13, 2013), new, energy efficient lighting is being installed

both inside and outside the building. All lighting installed outside – and some inside – is high efficiency LED lighting.

New energy-saving fluorescent lighting is being installed throughout the inside of the building.

OBITUARIES

thejewishvoice.org

Allan Jay Cokin, 71

Philip Kates, 84

Lantana, Fla. – Allan Jay Cokin, of West Palm Beach, Florida died on January 1, 2014. He was the son of the late Louis Cokin and Elise Cokin Broming. He was a world class, professional bridge expert, highly respected and liked by his colleagues.

He is survived by his sisters, Elaine Guzzardi and Jeri Broming (Charles) as well as stepchildren Matt Zealy (April), Marshall Zealy, Michael Zealy and Meredith Ostrow and grandchildren Hunter and Colton Zealy.

He is also survived by nieces Lenore Wait (Chris), Emma Broming, Lilly Broming, Madeline Broming and Rachel Guzzardi and by nephew Sam Guzzardi.

Contributions may be made to Hospice of Palm Beach County, 5300 East Avenue, West Palm Beach, FL 33407

NEW BEDFORD, Mass. – Philip Kates died December 30.

He was the husband of Dorothy (Levow) Kates for 63 years.

Born in Portland, Maine, he was a son of the late Samuel and Bella (Cope) Kates.

He was a graduate of the University of Maine and had worked in the New Bedford area for many years in retail.

He was a member of Tifereth Israel Congregation and was a Shriner and a Mason.

Besides his wife, he is survived by his children Sheryl Kates of Newton, Todd Kates of Newton and Steven Kates and his wife Susan of Needham; his sister Beryl Zecker of Framingham; his grandchildren, Heather and Brooke Porder, Vitaliy Kates and Adam and Sara Kates; and several nieces and nephews.

Contributions may be made to the New Bedford Jewish Convalescent Home, 200 Hawthorne St., New Bedford, MA 02740 or to United Cerebral Palsy of Metro Boston, Inc., 71 Arsenal St., Watertown, MA 02472.

Gloria Dressler, 89 CRANSTON – Gloria Dressler died December 18 at the Philip Hulitar Inpatient Center in P r ov id e nc e .

She was the wife of the late Maurice Dressler.

Born in Providence, she was the daughter of the late Albert and Fannie (Konovsky) Friedlander. She grew up in Fall River, graduating from Durfee High School in 1942.

She moved to Providence after she was married and lived in Cranston for the last forty years. She is survived by her daughter Maureen (Barry) and her son Michael (Amy), seven grandchildren and ten great grandchildren. She was the sister of Marilyn Levine (Julius) and the late Wilbert Friedlander (Irma).Contributions may be made to the charity of one’s choice.

Leo Kaufman, 86 CRANSTON – Leo Kaufman died January 9 at Philip Hulitar Inpatient Center in Providence.

Born in Providence, a son of the late Morris and Gertrude (Broomfield) Kaufman, he had lived in Warwick, then Florida for 41 years, before moving to Cranston in 2009.

He served as a Navy Seabee during WW-II, stationed in Okinawa and China, and was a member of the Seabee Veterans of America.

On September 28, 2013, he was among the largest contingent of veterans to be flown on The Honor Flight Network to Washington, D.C., to see the WWII Memorial.

He is survived by his daughter, Meredith Kaufman Ricci, his grandsons, David G. and

Michael J. Ricci, his son-in-law, John M. Ricci, his brother, Melvin Kaufman, his sister-in-law, Francine Kaufman and many nieces and nephews. He was pre-deceased by his seven siblings.

Contributions may be made to Seabee Veterans of America, 189 School Street, North Kingstown, RI 02852 or the Wounded Warrior Project, P.O. Box 758517, Topeka, Kansas 66675.

Alvin Maurice Krasner, 85 BURBANK, Calif. – Alvin Maurice Krasner died December 19. Born in Providence, July 7, 1928 to the late Jacob and Lillian Krasner, he was one of five children. He was married to the late Irma Krasner and was the father of the late James Howard Krasner. He is survived by his son Sheldon and two grandchildren. He spent many loving years with his partner, Arlene Kelman.

He was a Navy Pilot in World War II. He received a Ph. D. in the field of hypnotherapy. He was a member of the Masons, The Civil Air Patrol and was a recreational pilot. He founded The American Institute of Hypnotherapy, and a Ph.D. program. He authored “The Wizard Within,” still used as a textbook.

Contributions may be made to the charity of one’s choice.

Seymour W. “Sy” Kushner, 85 WELLESLEY, MASS. – Seymour W. “Sy” Kushner died December 28. He was the husband of Sylvia A. (Weinstein) Kushner and father of Marc A. Kushner (Laurie Salitan) and Joel L. Kushner (David Wolff). He was the grandfather of Emily Kushner Salitan, Nora Kushner Salitan, Estuardo Kushner Wolff and Ella Blum Kushner Rodriguez; he was also the brother of Russell Kushner and the late Diane (Kushner) Kaunfer, and

uncle and friend to many.

Born in Boston to Al and Mary (Yorra) Kushner, he earned a BS from Northeastern University and was a Loyal Mason and Master of the 100th Anniversary of Adelphi Lodge A.F and A.M. Contributions may be made to Boston Children’s Hospital (giving.childrenshospital.org), 300 Longwood Ave., Boston, MA 02115 or to the Kalsman Institute on Judaism & Health at Hebrew Union College-JIR (huc. edu/donate), 3077 University Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90007-3796.

Howard G. Pinsly, 69 PROVIDENCE – Howard G. Pinsly died January 2. Born in Providence, he was a son of the late Melvin and Etta (Gorman) Pinsly. He was the owner of the former Fryes Cigar Store. He was a graduate of Syracuse University.

He was the brother of Sharon Williams and her husband, Larry, of North Kingstown and Mitchell Pinsly and his wife, Sandra, of Elkins Park, Pa. He was the uncle of Jeremy, Mat-

January 17, 2014 |

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thew, and Melissa and the great uncle of Max. Contributions may be made to the American Cancer Society, 931 Jefferson Blvd, Suite 3004, Warwick, RI 02886.

Sally Pressman, 81 CRANSTON – Sally Pressman, died January 8. She was the wife of the late Joel Pressman. Born in Fall River, Mass., a daughter of the late Charles and Lena (Shogel) Kabalkin, she had lived in Cranston for more than 50 years, previously living in Providence. She was a bookkeeper for Wave Credit Union for over 35 years, retiring last year. She was a member of Temple Torat Yisrael.

She was the mother of Rhonda Pack and her husband, Robert, of Middletown, Conn., and Ellen Freeman and her husband, Richard, of Sharon, Mass., and sister of the late Everett Kabalkin. She was the grandmother of Jared and Lauren.

Contributions may be made to the American Cancer Society, 931 Jefferson Blvd, Suite 3004, Warwick, RI 02886.

32 | January 17, 2014

COMMUNITY

The Jewish Voice

Birthright – for your mom?

By EliSSa fEldER PROVIDENCE – With its notorious parties and “count-off,” Birthright is a rite of passage for many young Jews. It would also probably be the last place you’d expect to fi nd your Jewish mother. But this June, a group of ten Rhode Island women will be doing just that. In conjunction with the Jewish Women’s Renaissance Project (JWRP), these Jewish moms will spend nine days trekking across Israel learning about Israeli history, Israeli culture and Jewish life on Transform and Grow (TAG) Trips to Israel.

To date, JWRP has brought over 3,000 non-observant Jewish women on TAG’s highly subsidized trips to Israel. Women travel as a group, grow as a group and continue their journey back to their communities as sisters, having shared an incredible experience together. The mothers share a common vision of self-growth and personal development to reach their potential as Jewish women, wives and mothers.

Lisa Kuba, a participant from the May 2013 trip reflects, “You learn about Judaism, you learn about yourself … the trip teaches you how to be a better you.”

This is the fi rst year that a delegation from Rhode Island will join more than 200 other

Transform and grow trips to Israel

women on TAG 2014 for the nine-day, jam-packed schedule.

The women land in Israel on Monday morning and hit the ground running, starting in Tiberias with a cruise on the Sea of Galilee and a tour of the ancient city of Safed, then it’s off to Jerusalem for a visit to the Western Wall – including a tour of the acclaimed “Western Wall Tunnels,” a visit to Yad Vashem, and a local non-profit organization.

The trip also includes a visit to an army base where the women can meet with Israeli soldiers and learn about the Israeli army and the challenges it faces. Of course, no trip to Israel would be complete without a visit to Masada, a dip in the salty waters of the Dead Sea, a camel ride and gourmet meal hosted in a desert tent, looking out over the Judean Hills at sunset.

In addition to touring, trip participants are treated to stimulating and inspirational lectures and discussions about the Sabbath, tzedakah (charity), the Holocaust, the founding of the Jewish state and much more.

The women are engaged intellectually, physically, emotionally and spiritually. The lifetransforming trip ends with a visit to the Tomb of Rachel, where they bid shalom to the

matriarch, Rachel, and enjoy a sumptuous farewell banquet.

TAG trips are unique, though, in their ability to continue the experience even after participants have returned home to their families. In Rhode Island, the participants will have regular reunions, holiday gettogethers, and more, to perpetuate the community they’ve created and the experience they

shared. taG trips are for women who want to connect with their heritage and with Israel. It is an opportunity for busy mothers to reinvigorate, refresh and reconnect with themselves. It can be even more special, when friends and family sign up to experience it together. As one woman described, it was not only a gift for herself, but also

for her family, as she came back with new perspective and passion. for more information about the July 2014 trip (there will be an informational meeting at 8:00 p.m. on January 26) contact Elissa Felder (elissafelder@aol. com) at 421-4111, ext. 134 or go to the JWRP website, JWRP.org.

Positive Change, Growth, and Healing Hello, I'm Angela Rudner, LICSW and I'd like to welcome you to my new psychotherapy practice on 144 Waterman Street. I'm an experienced clinical social worker, therapist, and rabbi who believes that sometimes our most difficult moments hold the potential for positive change, growth, and healing. My approach is to integrate mindfulness with evidence based clinical practices.

Perhaps you are:

· An Individual feeling stuck personally, professionally, or creatively · A caregiver with compassion fatigue or burn out · A family or couple in need of counseling or parenting strategies · Struggling with addiction or recovery · An adolescent, teen, or college student facing challenges · Someone addressing loss and/or a life transition I'm a Brown graduate and Rhode Island native with a masters degree in social work licensed to practice in RI, MA, and MD. I am also a graduate of Hebrew Union College with a strong ecumenical background in Christian, Buddhist, and Interfaith Studies. For more information, or to schedule an appointment call (401) 573-9905 or write angsrudner@aol.com. Most Insurance plans are accepted.

Angela Graboys Rudner 144 Waterman Street, Suite 1 Providence, RI 02906 401-573-9905 angsrudner@aol.com

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Wedding – Elysa Pedowitz and Sean Lauro were married on Saturday, January 4, at Rhodes on the Pawtuxet, Cranston. Elysa is a teacher at the Alliance JCC Early Childhood Center.

SIMCHA

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Simchas

The Jewish Voice

A convocation of Eagles: Sylvia and Nathan Safferson of Warwick are proud to announce that their grandson Ben, left, made Eagle Scout on November 24. He was joined by their other grandson, Alan, who made Eagle in June, 2008, and their son Paul, who made Eagle in October, 1977. Ben’s Eagle project was working with a non-profit organization, Good Shepherd Housing, helping paint the interior of a home for a previously homeless family.

Bat Mitzvah – Ariel Elizabeth Finkle, of East Greenwich, became a Bat Mitzvah on October 12. She is a seventh-grade honor student at Cole Middle School and enjoys playing the violin in the school orchestra, dancing Broadway jazz and acting in school plays. Rabbi Amy Levin led the Bat Mitzvah service at Temple Torat Yisrael in East Greenwich. Ariel is the daughter of Jonathan and Judith Finkle, and the granddaughter of the late Manuel and Lillian Finkle of Waterford, Conn., and the late Martin and Selma Becker of Norwich, Conn.

Engagement – The Edward O. Adler family is happy to announce the engagement of Ariella Caplan to Aharon Mendlowitz. Ariella is the granddaughter of Edward O. Adler and the late Gertrude T. Adler. She is the daughter of Elan and Rivkah Adler of Ma’aleh Adumim, Israel, and Michael and Michelle Caplan of Baltimore, Maryland, and the niece of Susan and Ethan Adler. Aharon is the son of Adina and Abbe Mendlowitz of Ramat Bet Shemesh, Israel.

Birth – Noam Shein Parker was born on Nov. 20 to Jonas M. Parker and Michal Shein of Jamaica Plain, Mass. He is the grandson of Ellen S. Parker and Dr. Leonard J. Parker of Barrington and Miriam and Luis Shein of Oaxaca, Mexico.

Birth – Martin and Sheri Ross of North Attleboro, Mass., announce the birth of their second child. Jacob Aidan Ross, born on October 8. Jacob joins his big brother Ethan Benjamin (age 2).

His maternal grandparents are Richard and Linda Katz of Worcester, Mass., and his paternal grandparents are Allen and Sandra Ross of Smithfield.

Bar Mitzvah – Dylan Abraham Katz of Lincoln, son of Ronald and Yanina Katz, became a Bar Mitzvah on December 23 on Mount Masada, Israel.

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Kibbutz Gat (near the town of Kiryat Gat) – Varda, left, Daniel, Eve, and Ezra Stieglitz with the kibbutz cows in the background. Ezra writes, “I hope that the temperatures won’t be as frigid when we return to Rhode Island.”

Daniel Stieglitz is a columnist for The Jewish Voice.

we are read

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The Jewish Voice