Immanence

ImmanenceEJR

#letter, #complexity, #difference, #poetry

Dear Immanence,

Since I cannot seem to get to your intricate meaning, even after 4 weeks of getting to know you, I thought it most fitting to write you a letter. ‘Cause that’s what I often turn to in moments of misunderstandings, frustration, and loneliness. My dear Immanence, you’ve been a weight to carry, and for every text I read to somehow get closer to you, you become more and more vague, opaque, ambivalent, and distant. I googled you countless times, yet all your profiles don’t show what you might be like in real life. You are so reserved. You are the cloud above my head; every time I reach out, you drift further away and take a different shape. I’ve tried to internalize you because, as Deleuze says, you are that ‘divine logic that inhabits all. That is among us. That is inside of us.’ That encompasses life and death. The ghost in the shell. The soul? The strange thing is that you are not internal to me, no, you have become like an external entity that I shall never be able to grasp. You, dear Immanence, have become transcendental for me.

The more I internalize you, the more alien you become. Maybe I’ve gone too far in trying to understand you, lost in heaps and heaps of text on you. The thousands and thousands of letters that have already been written to you. But you, no, you will not be caught, because you are never-ending. I’m lost. So I thought it best to write you a poem.

I am a Goddess in the endlessness of my own soul The divine of my own celestial being I crawl into your skin, turn into dust I am all that has a will of its own

I am in all The molecule The cell The organism The object The subject The creature The human The touch, the love, the falling in and out of.

I am all The holy spirit of the subject The subject that is all

Immanence is ‘I’

The chaos of being Longing for inconsolability.