Intensity

EJRIntensity

#intensity

Intensity /ɪn ˈtɛnsɪti/

Noun Noun: intensity ; plural noun: intensities

1. The quality of being intense The pain grew more intense.

2. The measurable amount of a property, such as force, brightness, or a magnetic field Hydrothermal processes of low intensity.

Strength, power, potency, vigor, force, severity, ferocity, vehemence, violence, harshness, magnitude, greatness, concentration, extremity, seriousness, gravity.

The pain grew more intense with every step you took in the direction I was going. You asked me to slow down, but I kept on moving forward at the same pace. My knees are killing me, you mumbled softly, not loud enough for me to hear, I accelerated.

You like this town because nothing ever changes. Predictable, set, secure, safe. You were born here. The house where it happened is no longer your home. After the divorce your parents moved in different directions, they stayed but grew further apart. Hundred meters feel like a kilometer here. You moved in with your boyfriend, found an apartment above an ice-cream shop in the shopping-street. You bought a house a few years later. You walk the same path over and over again, until your weight and footprints leave behind a permanent imprint, like so many others before you, that walked this same path. Deeper and deeper, digging through layers of time, layers of sand, clay, rock, gravel, compost, limestone, water. Until you hope to reach the core, that so many others before you have tried to reach. Lukewarm fluid. Your mediocrity amuses me. Even though I might be just as bourgeois as you. Your cookie cut out life forming a sharp contrast with the nonconformity I try to live up to. But honestly, I’m doubting if I haven’t conformed to it too. Security is a comforting future.

Spreading my legs for you to enter me. Spreading my legs to accept pleasure but all I felt was pain. Your knees were killing you again. I changed directions. I jumped the cliff.

– Was that your first time? – you asked. – No– I lied. What first time? Isn’t every time a first time. Next time I’ll change the layout of my room, then the second time will be a first time too.

You will ask if I moved that vase. I won’t answer since I’m already thinking about the time after; what I should place on my nightstand so I’ll have something new to look at while your weight crushes me. As I’m crushed between the hard metal springs of my mattress and the hardness of you. I know which one I prefer. I accelerate again.

Consequences Burnout is a state of emotional, physical and mental exhaustion caused by excessive amounts of intensities, or looking for these excessive amounts of intensities.

It occurs when you feel emotionally drained, overwhelmed and unable to meet constant demands.

As the search for the intense life continues, you begin to loose interest and motivation that led you to take on certain roles at certain times.