A Parents’ Guide to Bullying/Cyberbullying

A Parents’ Guide to Bullying/Cyberbullying y g y y g Karen Haase Harding & Shultz (402) 434-3000 khaase@hslegalfirm.com H & S School Law

This is not your y Grandma’s assemblyy

Bullying? any ongoing pattern of physical, verbal, or electronic abuse on school grounds, in a vehicle hi l owned, d leased, l d or contracted t t db by a school beingg used for a school p purpose p by a school employee or his or her designee or at school-sponsored designee, activities or school-sponsored athletic events.

Bullying? any ongoing pattern of physical, verbal, or electronic abuse on school grounds, in a vehicle hi l owned, d leased, l d or contracted t t db by a school beingg used for a school p purpose p by a school employee or his or her designee or at school-sponsored designee, activities or school-sponsored athletic events.

Simply stated, bullying: • •

• •

Is intimidating or subjecting a person to hostility or ill treatment Involves actions which cause another person to feel afraid, humiliated embarrassed, humiliated, embarrassed threatened or shamed Occurs in a relationship where there is an imbalance of power Is repeated over time

Is it bullying?

Normal Conflict

Bullying

• Equal Power/friends • Happens episodically • Accidental • Equal emotional reaction • Remorse • Effort to solve problem

• Imbalance of power • Repeated pattern of behavior • Intentional • Unequal U l emotional ti l reaction • Blames Bl ttargett • No effort to solve • Seeking power

Cyberbullying? the use of technology such as computers and cell phones to engage in repeated, and dh hostile til b behavior h i b by an iindividual di id l or group, g p that is intended to harm others.

The term ""cyberbullying" Th b b ll " is usedd when h the h victim or bully b ll is a child or teen. The term cyber harassment is used when the victim is an adult. adult

Common Cyberbullying Tactics  Stealing someone someone’ss online name and using it to write nasty rumors, comment, or spread gossip. i  Alteringg someone’s message g or doctoring photographs to say something different or make fun of a person.

Common Cyberbullying Tactics ďƒ˜Secretly recording conversations using a cell phone, then playing the recording i back for f the person being i discussed. ďƒ˜Posting damaging information on blogs or web sites sites. ďƒ˜Creating or taking part in Internet polling or list-making

Cyberbullying y y g Example of cyberbullying b b ll i on iChat (Apple’s instant messaging) i )

Divagirl: Hey, loser, watch your back. t t323 What tmt323: Wh t r u talking about?

Divagirl: Why don't you kill yourself while u r ahead? tmt323: Why can't you just leave me alone?

Divagirl: Ugly girls like u need to be put in their place.

How Common is Cyberbullying? ďƒ˜ one in four students between the g of 11 and 19 have been the ages victim of cyberbullying. ďƒ˜ Approximately A i t l 65 percentt off kids kid know of someone who has been cyberbullied.

Not Myy Kid! Told parents: 51% of preteens and 35% of teens Told T ld ffriend:44% i d 44% off preteens t and d 72% of teens Told no one: 16% of preteens and teens

So what’s what s the big deal?

School-Related Consequences  Neb. Rev. Stat. 79-2,137  Definition: “ongoing ongoing pattern of physical, verbal or electronic abuse”  Consequences: ─ Loss of extracurricular privileges ─ Detentions D t ti ─Short and Long Term Suspension ─Expulsion E li ─Alternative School Assignment

Examples p  Seattle, WA.: Students who “liked” Facebook page bullying a classmate p all suspended  Memphis TN: Honors student suspended for 180 days for commenting on a friend’s status

Warning Signs that your child may be b a ttarget: t  Frequently socially isolated  Less assertive/lacks social skills  Appears weak or easily dominated  Tries to stay close to adults in social situations  Does not discuss friends or social activities that occurred at school

What to do:  Talk to your child: • Need to empower the victim • Strategize and role play • Take actions on solvable issues

 Contact the School • Set up a meeting • Collaborate to develop a plan

 Investigate counseling options  Contact Law Enforcement

Cyberbullying ďƒ˜ Do not erase the evidence ďƒ˜ Contact C t t your IInternet t t provider, id th the social networking site, or cell phone company and file a complaint

Do Not:  Overreact  Ignore the situation  Confront bully or his/her parents  Tell yyour child to fight g the bullyy

What about the bully?  Studies show that children identified as a bully by age 8 are six times more likely to be convicted of a crime by age 24  60% of kids characterized as bullies in the 6th-99th grade d h had d at lleast one criminal i i l conviction by age 24  Bullies are five times more likely to end up g 30 with a serious criminal record byy age

Warning Signs that your child may be a bully:  Frequent name-calling i  Regular bragging  Needs to consistntly get own way  Spends time with younger/less powerful kids  Lack of empathy  Frequent defiance or hostility

What to do:  Talk to your child: • Do not condone behavior • Discuss motivations • Encourage empathy

 Contact the School • Set up a meeting • Collaborate to develop a plan

 Investigate counseling options

Criminal Consequences (State Law)  Neb. Rev. Stat. 28-311.01  Terroristic Threats: “threatens to commit any crime of violence …

• With the intent to terrorize another • In reckless disregard of the risk of causing such terror  Class IV Felony punishable by: • Up to 5 years in prison and/or • $10,000 fine

In re Minor Child (Ala.)  High school students arrested at school for threatening classmate on y p MySpace • Threatened to beat him up • Said they would plant a bomb in his locker • Said he deserved to die

 Charged with making terroristic threats

State v. Murphy (NE)  Girl’s family disliked defendant  On O MySpace M S he h wrote: t • He was ggoingg to "beat the hell out of a lot of people" • He would be "killing killing a lot of people people.“ • Told girlfriend’s sister he didn’t “want to end d up killi killing her h or her h kid.” kid ”

 Charged with making terroristic threats

A Parents’ Guide to Bullying/Cyberbullying y g y y g Karen Haase Harding & Shultz (402) 434-3000 khaase@hslegalfirm.com H & S School Law