Northland Family - March 2011

OMG! Hold the phone Do I have to do EVERYTHING around here?

TAME THE TOYS MARCH 3, 2011 • LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY COURIER, THE SMITHVILLE HERALD, GLAD S TO N E D I S PAT C H

Starting late is worth the wait

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MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

LI B E RT Y T R I BU N E , T H E K E A R NEY COURIER, THE SMITHVILLE HERALD, GLADSTONE DISPATCH

MARCH 3, 2011

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Introduce us to your Northland family

Luck of the Irish

Originally a religious holiday to honor St. Patrick, who introduced Christianity to Ireland in the fifth century, St. Patrick’s Day has evolved into a celebration for all things Irish.

The world’s first St. Patrick’s Day parade occurred on March 17, 1762, in New York City, featuring Irish soldiers serving in the English military. This parade became an annual event, with President Truman attending in 1948.

Congress proclaimed March as Irish-American Heritage Month in 1995, and the president issues a proclamation commemorating the occasion each year.

We want to feature our readers in upcoming issues of Northland Family.

Send us a snapshot of your clan and answers to these questions.

Who is in your family? (names, ages of each family member — and pets, too, if you want) What does “family” mean to you?

What sets your family apart?

What are your favorite family traditions?

What is a typical Saturday like for your family?

Send your photo and answers to northlandfamily@npgco.com, or find us on Facebook and comment there.

northlandfamily@npgco.com

36.9 million

This is the number of U.S. residents who claimed Irish ancestry in 2009. This number was more than eight times the population of Ireland itself (4.5 million).

Irish was the nation’s second most frequently reported ancestry in the 2009 American Community Survey, trailing only German.

ON THE COVER This Northland family includes parents Dan and Jen Mackey and their children, Kaleigh, age 5, and Mason, age 2. PHOTO BY Matt Frye

— U.S. Census Bureau

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MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

The Accidental Parent Dive in with me

By Betsy Lee

i

In 2007, I was just another 20something, stumbling through life. I went drinking on Tuesdays, shared a bedroom in the home of a more responsible friend and was passionately committed to my profession — journalism. My boyfriend and I were engaged in the classic tumble toward adulthood.

But toward the end of that year, we tripped. I’ll spare you the details.

But one little pink line later and we found ourselves thrust into a world we didn’t anticipate being a part of until later in life. We found ourselves comparing obstetricians instead of sampling beers. Discussing baby names instead of the state of journalism. And thinking about mortgages instead of rent.

We became accidental parents.

There are millions of us out there. ◆ My children need me in a way I’ve never been Some married. Some not. needed before. This — all at once — is inspiring Sometimes we’re ashamed. Sometimes we’re and nauseatingly terrifying. proud. ◆ Most of the time, my children bring out the very best But we would all agree that the “accident,” which in me. Occasionally, they bring out the very worst. now bears various nicknames ranging from “love” to “stinker,” is beautiful. ◆ Sometimes, I’ll screw things up. Badly. I’m pretty Not fresh flowers beautiful. Or even Monet beautiful.

Ocean beautiful. sure that my kids will love me anyway.

Beautiful in a beckoning, dangerous way. With ◆ I will never be fully rested again. gorgeous sands and rocks, seahorses and stinging jellyfish; cuddles and temper ◆ Parents, especially actantrums; tremendous love and My little accident is now cidental ones, are judged tremendous frustration. constantly. Even by people It’s complex and yet, natural 3 years old. His sister, a who don’t have children. I’ve and simple. learned to give ’em the finger, My little accident is now 3 “planned” baby, is 1. if only in my imagination, and years old. His sister, a “planned” move on. baby, is 1.

And sometimes, I still And sometimes, I still wake wake up in the morning, ◆ Maintaining my sense of up in the morning, look at my self, as my children develop toy-strewn house and wonder, look at my toy-strewn theirs, is paramount to our “Who do these children belong family’s survival. to and why won’t they leave me house and wonder, alone?”

“Who do these children I suppose I assumed that As I write this monthly after having children, I would column, I’m just exploring belong to and why won’t comfortably settle back into — my life as a parent and, my old self — like a favorite, but perhaps, yours too. I’m trythey leave me alone?” ing to find the big lessons recently re-upholstered chair. hidden in the little moments.

Never did I think that the waves I’m laughing, at myself and at some of the stupid would just keep on coming. things we all do. But most of all, I’m being unflinchI’m no longer just a person. I’m a parent. ingly honest.

In the years since my son’s birth, I’ve learned the So, accidental parent or not, please join me. following: Together, we can go a little deeper into this crazy, ◆ I am willing to be paid — for the most physically, beautiful ocean. emotionally challenging and, in some cases, Betsy Lee is a Kansas City journalist and columnist who mind-numbing work I’ve ever done — in coos, lives in a perpetually messy house with her husband, smiles, hugs and laughter. two children and two pets. She can be reached at ◆ Clean is relative. And it’s OK. contactbetsylee@gmail.com.

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MARCH 3, 2011

Tame the toys

Safety starts with

recalls Millions of toys are manufactured every year.

While the large majority of them are safe for child use, a few slip through the cracks and are deemed unsafe after they hit the store shelves. To ensure that the toys children are playing with will provide years of safe enjoyment, parents and caregivers can keep abreast on product recalls.

There are a few ways individuals can keep track of products.

The first is by registering any items with the company from which they were bought. This can be done via the postcard that is included in the packaging of many toys and other products or by going onto the manufacturer’s Web site and filling out the required information. If the company engages in a voluntary recall, registered people can be informed.

Another method to finding out about product recalls and unsafe items is to contact any number of organizations. Many third-party organizations regularly post information about product recalls, the most notable of which is the Consumer Product Safety Commission.

Those interested in learning about potential recalls can use the following contact information.

• Consumer Product Safety Commission: Visit the CPSC Web site at www.cpsc.gov and click on the “Recalls and Product Safety News” link.

• Recalls.gov: This is a relatively new site that has combined the jurisdictions of six U.S. federal agencies to alert the public.

• Baby Zone: This site regularly publishes information about safety recalls. Here is the link for the 2010 recalls: www.babyzone.com/safety/recalls/photos_2010-recalls-toy-gear/.

• Recalls.org: A nonprofit organization for the benefit of the public, Recalls.org publishes product recalls.

• Fisher-Price: Fisher-Price recalled a number of products at the end of 2010. For a complete list of products and instructions, visit www.service.mattel. com/us/recall.asp.

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The “Having a Child” instruction manual may have talked about 2 a.m. feedings and bouts of colic, but it may not have mentioned that having kids often means acquiring a household of stuff designed to care for and amuse these little ones — including lots and lots of toys.

If spring cleaning means taming the toys and games in the home so that the living room doesn’t look like an aisle in Toys ‘R Us, keep in mind that it’s possible to maintain some style in the home while cohabitating with the kids.

Smart storage is one of a parent’s best friends. Look for items that can hold kid toys and accessories but don’t look like they were designed for kids.

Nix the primary colored plastic bins for something more sophisticated, like an upholstered ottoman with a hinged cover for storage inside.

Turn wicker baskets and other sleek accessories into toy bins.

Even magazine holders and desk organization accessories can hold small figurines and children’s books.

Parents can even reserve one or two drawers in a bureau or china cabinet to quickly stash toys when company is coming over.

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MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

It’s not whether but when, Mom and Dad. Kids these days are on a plan.

g

By Alicia McGarry Gone are the days when we’d push our kids out the door at sunrise, calling them in when the streetlights came on. If we needed sooner, we’d simply hunt ’em down by calling their friends’ houses. On landlines. Ah, those were the days — or, were they? Looking back, releasing our children into the wild with nary a lifeline back home seems a lot riskier today, doesn’t it?

These days, more than 90 percent of American adults own a cell phone (Pew Research Center, 2011), and the number of kids with a mobile device is rising quickly. With their parents’ noses practically grafted to the screens of their smartphones, it’s really no mystery why the age at which kids begin asking for their own phones keeps dipping lower.

Embrace it or not, the reality is, if you’re a parent and you haven’t already caved, you’ll eventually be adding your children to your own plan. The question has therefore become not whether, but when.

Laura Thomas-Gerdes, director of Helping Hands Montessori in Gladstone, said that, while she has yet to see any of the 3- to 6-year-olds in her school with a cell phone, her own fifth-grader, Ethan, is outnumbered by friends with plans.

“In our house, the rule is that by 13, or when the kids participate in extracurriculars requiring them to stay after school or attend off-campus events, like sports,” Thomas-Gerdes said.

Her 16-year-old daughter Caitlyn, an athlete Oak Park High School, has her own (parent-paid) cell — an expense Thomas-Gerdes sees as critical for her daughter’s safety.

“If something were to happen and she missed the after-school bus, or needed to call me urgently for any reason, would I rather have my daughter knocking on a stranger’s door asking to use their phone, or calling me from her own?” Thomas-Gerdes said.

In fact, it’s for these same reasons of safety — and parental peace of mind — that the North Kansas City Schools district has chosen not to ban mobile devices from its halls.

“Some parents want their children to carry cell phones to and from school for safety reasons, so here at Topping (Elementary School), to keep them safe and to avoid classroom distractions, we store about seven to 10 cell phones a day for our students in the school office,” said Principal Dana Miller.

At the secondary level, similar rules apply, said Mike Jeffers, the district’s deputy director of secondary education.

“Cell phones are quite common, but similar guidelines apply: Students are asked to store them during class time, so they do not interrupt the classroom experience,” he said.

And with the average American teenager sending and receiving an average of more than 3,000 texts a month according to Nielsen, it’s certainly easy to imagine how cell phones can be detrimental to a learning environment.

Yet, the value added in terms safety is incontrovertible, leaving many parents on the fence about if or when to hook their kids up with a plan.

Cell phone companies, of course, want to make that decision easier for parents and have made significant effort to maximize parental control over their kids’ phones. A few years ago, companies toyed with the kiddie-phone concept in products like the Migo, but advancement in cell technology has already rendered most phones like these obsolete.

“Now, we offer parents total control over their kids’ phones, whether that’s how many minutes they are able to use, or shutting off texting ability during school hours or after bedtime,” said one representative from the Verizon store in Liberty.

“Giving parents complete control allows them to feel comfortable with their decision to provide a phone for their child earlier than ever before — when a kid is ready to demonstrate personal responsibility, we think that’s the right time to give them a phone.”

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LI B E RT Y T R I BU N E , T H E K E A R NEY COURIER, THE SMITHVILLE HERALD, GLADSTONE DISPATCH

MARCH 3, 2011

Each spring, regions around the world adjust the clocks to move one hour ahead. This contributes to more sunlight during the evening hours and, theoretically, helps conserve energy.

Daylight saving time was the brainchild of Benjamin Franklin, who thought it would help increase productivity in the early evening by increasing the hours of sunlight during the warmer months. Franklin also thought DST would be a good way to save on candles, among other energy used to artificially light areas once the sun had set.

Some people have mistakenly thought that DST was created to benefit the farmer. But no studies have proven that more sunlight in the evening positively affects a farmer’s schedule or the growing cycle of crops.

DST also doesn’t have too great an impact on energy conservation. Many studies have shown little to no energy savings from having more sunlight in the evening. That is because even if the lights are turned off, other things are turned on, such as air conditioners and pool filters for individuals enjoying the added sunlight hours instead of retiring early to bed.

There have been points throughout history when DST did help conserve energy. This occurred mainly during the World Wars, when conservation of en-

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ergy helped divert money and fuel sources toward the war effort.

While it may not help save energy, a 2007 study

by RAND determined that DST does help reduce vehicular crashes, perhaps because of better visibility when on the road in the spring and summer.

DST is now done largely out of habit. In the United States, from 1986 to 2006, DST began on the first Sunday in April and continued through the last Sunday in October. However, it is now observed from the second Sunday in March to the first Sunday in November, adding about a month of extra sunlight in the evening.

DST is not required in the U.S., but if states do participate, they must do so according to the federal schedule.

Arizona, Hawaii, areas of Puerto Rico, and the Virgin Islands are among the U.S. areas that do not participate in DST, choosing instead to operate on standard time all year long.

In 2011, DST will occur on March 13 at 2 a.m.

Individuals will be “springing ahead,” moving the clock an hour forward and losing an hour of sleep.

As people hit the snooze alarm another time, they can thank Benjamin Franklin for that lost hour of sleep.

— Metro Creative

Shedding light on daylight savings time

Although most people lose an hour of sleep the first night of daylight savings time, the idea behind it was to make people more productive and save energy during the evening.

PHOTO: METRO CREATIVE

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MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

St. Patrick’s Day fun — yum!

Everybody’s a little bit Irish on St. Patrick’s Day, right? This year, join in the fun of celebrating all things Irish with these simple ideas: For the table, have the kids make some shamrock napkin rings and Irish flag placemats out of construction paper. Sprinkle some green confetti on the table and use a potted shamrock plant as a centerpiece.

Have a traditional Irish dinner with Irish stew and soda bread, a shepherd’s pie or, of course, corned beef and cabbage.

For dessert try this festive “Lucky You” mint pie. The creamy combination of mint and chocolate is so good that it’s bound to become the newest tradition around your St. Patrick’s Day table.

Write out some traditional Irish blessings on slips of paper and tuck them into treat bags of mini shamrock cookies to send home with your guests.

Here’s one that I like: May you always have walls for the winds, a roof for the rain, tea beside the fire, laughter to cheer you, those you love near you, and all your heart might desire.

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LI B E RT Y T R I BU N E , T H E K E A R NEY COURIER, THE SMITHVILLE HERALD, GLADSTONE DISPATCH

MARCH 3, 2011

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Dealing with eating disorders In the United States, as many as 10 in 100 young women suffer from an eating disorder.

Overeating related to tension, poor nutritional habits and food fads are relatively common eating problems for youngsters, according to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.

Parents frequently wonder how to identify symptoms of anorexia nervosa and bulimia. These disorders are characterized by a preoccupation with food and a distortion of body image. Unfortunately, many teenagers hide these serious and sometimes fatal disorders from their families and friends. With comprehensive treatment, most teenagers can be relieved of the symptoms or helped to control young women eating have one disorders.

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OUTDOOR CRAFTS Handmade projects to keep the family busy while you’re waiting for the mercury to rise

The AACAP’s “Facts for Families: Teenagers With Eating Disorders” offers information for kids, teens and families.

For more information, visit www. aacap.org.

As families await the arrival of warmer weather, there are things they can do to prepare for a season of fun in the sun. Engaging in some craft projects are ways to beat cabin fever while dreaming of warm, springtime weather to come.

There are many craft projects families and children can tackle, but ideas that involve projects that can be put to use outdoors may be the most fitting. Fortunately, there are a number of ideas for crafty projects to involve everyone in the household.

Birdhouse: Head to the hardware store and pick up a few supplies. Otherwise, chances are items that can be made into a birdhouse probably can be found from scraps of materials already around the house or in the garage. Scraps of wood, metal, tiles, plastic, and the like can be used to craft a bird house or feeder. Even an empty plastic bottle can be used. Some nesting material, such as pieces of yarn or cotton, can be placed inside the house to

entice birds to take up residence once the weather warms.

Stepping stones: Stepping stones can be a whimsical way to dress up the outdoor garden or yard. A trip to the craft store for some plaster or even a quick-set cement can be the medium to use for the stones.

Experiment with shapes that can be used as molds, and gather different materials that can be embedded into the stepping stone, such as pebbles, marbles, beads, etc. Use a pencil or another pointed tool to engrave a message or name on the stepping stones before allowing them to dry and harden.

Kite: The beginning of the spring season often arrives behind a burst of wind. Make the most of blustery conditions by crafting a kite from a kitchen trash bag, some sticks and string.

Garden gnomes: Craft stores often sell

unfinished pottery that can be painted and sealed. See if garden gnomes or other whimsical creatures can be found. Use acrylic paint to decorate the figurines in your favorite colors.

Outdoor games: A large piece of plywood or fiberboard can serve as the game board for a number of different activities.

Use spray paint to stencil on alternating squares of red and black for a larger-thanlife checkerboard or chess board. For those with more time and creative stamina, use large stones to pain on letters and make an outdoor Scrabble board for fun times with family and friends.

Painted flower pots: If the colors and designs at the local garden center don’t fit with a particular design scheme, buy unfinished terra-cotta or plastic pots and paint them with the designs and colors that coordinate better.

— Metro Creative

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MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

starting late is worth the wait

w

By Nancy Hull Rigdon

When Mary Jo Rodgers was in her early 20s, she had three requirements for a husband: tall, dark and handsome.

By her mid 20s, her list of requirements had changed.

“I wouldn’t date anyone that didn’t have a car, a job and a degree. And his parents still had to be married,” Rodgers, of Smithville, said.

One month short of 28, she snagged a husband who met all her new requirements.

With her husband, Dan, five years older than her, they had their first child at ages 31 and 36. And their third child came two years ago, when they were 38 and 43.

With the ages at which people are marrying and having children on the rise, her family represents a growing trend.

In the 1960s and 1970s, men and women were, on average, marrying and having their first child in their early 20s. The average ages steadily increased through the decades. Now, the average ages for marriage and first birth sit near the mid-20s.

And the Rodgers couldn’t be happier to be a part of that trend.

“Had I gotten married and had children younger, I wouldn’t be as good of a wife and mom. I was selfish when I was younger. I wanted to party. I wanted to travel. I wanted to work,” she said. “Now, I ask myself, ‘What’s best for my children?

What’s best for my family?’ I was not mature enough in my 20s to have made those choices.”

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Driving the trend What has driven the trend toward waiting until later in life to settle down?

“It’s the economy,” said June Carbone, the Edward A. Smith/Missouri Chair of Law, the Constitution and Society at the University of Missouri-Kansas City School of Law. Her book, “Red Families v. Blue Families,” explores issues including the age at which people marry and have children.

The increase in the number of people graduating from college has pulled up the average ages, Carbone explained, as people are increasingly prioritizing obtaining degrees before starting families.

An upside to the trend, she pointed out, is that the older people are when they marry, the less likely they are to divorce. Part of that is due to people becoming more settled and stable — financially, socially and in other ways — as they age, she said. At the same time, she points out that many great marriages still begin when couples are in their early 20s.

‘Don’t wait too long’ The downside to putting off marriage and children includes that the longer you wait, the louder your biological clock may tick.

The older people are when they try to have children, the more

MARCH 3, 2011

likely they are to struggle with conceiving, stressed Dr. Gregory C. Starks, infertility specialist with Midwest Women’s Healthcare at North Kansas City Hospital.

“Don’t wait too long,” Starks said.

A woman’s last good fertility window is typically at 35 to 37 years of age, he said. Men can start to have struggles, although not as profound as women’s, beginning at 40.

He has found that people struggling to start a family are caught off guard with the tie between age and infertility.

“Most people feel that their ability to conceive is automatic. And they are surprised when their body isn’t working,” Starks said. “A lot of that stems from what they see in the media. Celebrities are having children at 45, 47. And there is this explosion of twins in Hollywood.

That is misleading — those people are having egg donations.”

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Median age at first marriage, United States Men: 26.7 Women: 25.1 Median age at first marriage, Missouri Men: 25.8 Women: 24.7 Average age of mothers at first birth, United States 25.1 Average age of mothers at first birth, Missouri 24

‘A great life, a great family’ Rodgers laughs as she remembers the tall, dark and handsome requirements of her early 20s.

“My husband is an inch shorter than I am,” she said. “I never would have picked him out of a crowd in my younger years.”

But she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“At the end of the day, we have a great life, a great family,” she said.

Sources: U.S. Census, 2004 release; Centers for Disease Control, 2003 release

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816.781.9630 I-35 Hwy & Pleasant Valley Rd.

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816.468.4011 1 blk west of 72nd & N. Oak

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12

MARCH 3, 2011

LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY C O U R I E R , T H E S M I T H V I L L E H E R A L D, G L A D S TO N E D I S PAT C H

Safe Haven for Newborns

Um, yeah, that was ME

Missouri and Kansas as well as all the other 48 states have some form of the Safe Haven for Newborns Law. These laws allow parents to safely relinquish their newborns instead of resorting to abandonment or abuse.

In Missouri, hospitals, fire stations, police stations and ambulance stations are Safe Haven sites. The child must be 5 days old or younger and show no signs of abuse.

In Kansas, hospitals, fire stations and health departments are Safe Haven sites. The child must be 45 days old or younger and show no signs of abuse.

If the state laws are followed, the parents will not be prosecuted.

The Safe Haven for Newborns Coalition of Greater Kansas City is a group of community partners whose goal is to raise awareness of the Safe Haven laws in Missouri and Kansas. Mother & Child Health Coalition is a sponsor of this coalition and hosts a webpage to share information about the law and efforts in the metro area to spread the word. To learn more, go to http://mchc.net/programs/safe_havens.aspx.

Who does most of the chores around the house? A recent survey by Cozi.com, an online calendar for busy families, found that both men and women claim to do most of the work!

• Women say they do 73 percent of the cooking, while men claim they do 48 percent. There must be lots of leftovers.

• Apparently the laundry is getting done twice, since mom does 76 percent of it and Dad does 47 percent.

• Mom says she does 77 percent of the grocery shopping, while Dad claims 52 percent. Clearly those cupboards aren’t bare.

To keep your family from overstocking and over-washing, be sure to schedule chores on a family calendar.

— StatePoint

NORTHLAND FAMILY IS A SPECIAL SECTION PUBLISHED THE FIRST WEEK OF EACH MONTH BY LIBERTY TRIBUNE, THE KEARNEY COURIER, THE SMITHVILLE HERALD AND GLADSTONE DISPATCH, DIVISIONS OF NPG NEWSPAPERS, INC. MAILING ADDRESS: 104 N. MAIN ST., LIBERTY, MO 64068 ADVERTISING INQUIRIES: 816-781-4941 EDITORIAL INQUIRIES: NORTHLANDFAMILY@NPGCO.COM

BEST KEPT SECRET IN THE NORTHLAND “I love giving the one-on-one special time with the residents. spe Feeling F elin like I make a difference is Fe important to me.”

—Shannelle McAdams, CNA — ppictured ic with Joan Dockweiler

We offer...

We offer...

• A quiet environment in a smaller, more personal setting designed for Long Term Care • Staff that is truly caring and committed • Large private rooms available at an additional cost • Activities suited to your lifestyle

• ALL ROOMS ARE PRIVATE AND OVERSIZED • A quiet environment with staff that understand you want to rehab quickly and return home quickly • 7 day a week therapy to allow for a faster recovery • Separate entrance and location dedicated only for rehabilitation clients that are returning home

Conveniently located just off Hwy 69 in the Northland Area in the Excelsior Springs Medical Complex

Call us at 630-1024 or visit us at 1410 Hospital Drive