FREE
It’s been a good year. You stay classy KCL!
Students at Guy’s campus show the Government that they stand to defend the education they love
STUDENTS WIN FIGHT AGAINST
King’s News King’s Entertainment Vol 19, Issue 10 May 15th - Sept 20th 2012
www.roarnews.co.uk Got a story over the summer?
Want to get involved next year?
editor@roarnews.co.uk @roar_news roar! newspaper 020 7379 9833 Macadam Building, Surrey Street, London WC2R 2NS
well... almost! Zoe Tipler
Over the last year, students’ unions across the country have been fighting against various proposals within the Government’s Higher Education White Paper. When £9000 fees were announced last summer, the National Union of Students (NUS) urged unions to use turn that disappointing set-back into a positive: and use the impending fee-rise as a way to pressure universities to ‘come clean’ on what that £9000 fees would actually include. KCLSU President Hannah Barlow, and Vice President Simi Smith, led the campaign against Hidden Course Costs at King’s. A survey ran through the autumn term for all students to fill in their course costs, and course-reps were also asked to feedback any suggestions for solutions. The results of these surveys - which Roar! reported on in the last issue - showed that many students arrived at King’s unaware that they would have to fork out for field trips, CRB checks,
Using this data collected at local unions, the NUS were able to put pressure on the QAA (Quality Assurance Agency) who create regulations for universities to follow. Following this pressure, the QAA have ruled within their UK Quality Code that universities are now required to provide information on any additional costs to prospective students. Indicator 2 of the Code states that universities must: ensure that they are transparent about the costs students have to meet, but also that they do not deter students as a result. Which is a clear push for universities to include as many costs as possible within their tuition fees.excellent news for students. Barlow will now be submitting the results of KCLSU’s survey, with solutions proposed to tackle the commonest problems at King’s, to the College education Committee to be discussed by Departments and Heads of Schools.
ARE YOU FIT TO SIT?
God Save the Queen
Look after yourself this exam season
WIth the jubilee creeping closer, are we
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continued on page 4
SPORTS
NEWS 5
travel to medical placements, books or lab equipment essential to their course. Unions across the country found the same.
COMMENT
Roar! is an independent Student Media society at KCLSU. Views expressed in Roar! do not necessarily reflect those of Roar!’s Editorial Board, KCLSU, its trustees, or its employees, or of King’s College London.
HIDDEN COURSE COSTS!
amused or not amused?
Chelsea Chic 23
Fash&Lifestyle analyse the weird and wonderful fashion choices of the MIC crowd. Darling!
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Memory Lane
Lara Medawar: One of my favourite King’s moments is when King’s won Varsity 2011. Despite having gone with friends, many of whom not the slightest bit interested in rugby, the tense final minutes were tense, nail-biting and so exciting and when we won everyone was jumping and hugging each other with glee. A proud moment to be wearing red!
So long, farewell! The end is nigh, for the year at least. Most of you will be buried under revision or exams and all manor of misery. The library has become home and there doesn’t seem to be time for much except stress. It is the weirdest thing waiting for something to end, I had the bittersweet moment of getting my last loan payment and booking my last Student Loan Company funded holiday.
Ed Lawless: Winning The London Varsity 2011 was with out a doubt my favourite moment at King’s. It was a truly incredible display of King’s passion from those of us who played and those who were in the crowd that surged onto the pitch to congratulate us after winning in the last play.
Doing Roar! has been interesting, I hope you agree we have made great improvements, it’s an evolutionary process but we have done more issues than ever before, the website has been more popular and I think that we have maintained our independence. The new team will be appointed soon with all their bells and whistles and I’m sure they will face new and exciting challenges. Graduation brings with it a question, can I be bothered to attend? I know two things, it’s deeply uncool to don your robes and wait for eons for the 30 seconds of wondering across the stage, and that as its in October so far from the end of my degree that it seems pointless, I mean it’s happened after 2012 freshers for goodness sake! Neither of my parents bothered going to their graduation, it was not the done thing, and both say they regret it. It’s part of the university experience apparently. Whether thats true or not I have been to graduation before and it is the most boring thing ever, it would be different if my sir name started A but T is going to be agonisingly dull. I am however quite keen on the idea of the graduation ball, if only for an excuse to get lary at the Waldorf.
FEATURES
We asked King’s soon-to-be graduates what their fondest memory of King’s will be!
INSIDE THIS ISSUE...
Editor’s Note
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Freya Pascall: KCL Radio winning the student radio association gold award for best outside broadcast 2011! It was a truly amazing achievement, and even though I’m leaving King’s I’ll keep listening at kclradio.co.uk!
Anna Wriggley: My favourite memories are all linked to AIDS Awareness week, which I helped to organise at the beginning of December 2011. We put on a whole range of events, marking 30 years since AIDS was first diagnosed, teaming up with King’s Medical Corps, LGBT, Sexpression and Medsin. We raised over £900 and sold over 400 AIDS ribbons. We also made a photo petition which went to the House of Commons asking David Cameron to stand up on World AIDS day to pledge that the UK should step up the fight against AIDS.
The most viewed on w w w. r o a r n e w s . c o . u k
1.Over Exposed: The Rise of the Naked Team Calendar, by Natasha Bloor
Keeping in touch with King’s after Graduation
After you finish your studies, you join thousands of other former students of King’s and the Colleges with which it has merged, and become part of a global network of King’s alumni. As an alumni you automatically become a member of the KCLA (King’s College London Association). The KCLA operates through an independent elected Council drawn from King’s alumni and works closely with the Alumni Office to run events such as the KCLA games, Duel Day dinners and more. Alongside the KCLA, the King’s Alumni Office is always on hand to help you keep in touch with former classmates, organise reunions and identify networking and mentoring opportunities. The Alumni Office also organise a wide range of events both on and off campus.
... for the under 25s!
Eurotrip Your guide to the best festivals on the continent
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this summer.
At graduation, you’ll get the opportunity to give the Alumni Office your details so that it’ll be easier to stay in touch. You’ll have the chance to note down whether you’ll be happy to come back to King’s for things such as inspirational career talks for current students, and give something back to the College community!
FILM
Zoe Tipler: Sport tours are always my highlight of the year, and it gets worse or better every year, depending on your penchant for gin...
editor@roarnews.co.uk
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MUSIC
Zoe
Matt Lever bemoans the world of renting, estate agents, and tenency agreements
Tickets for £20...
Have a great summer and best of luck to everyone graduating in whatever happens next. lots of love
Housing Hell
ARTS
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2. Formula 1: Why you should be watching! by Korrie Stanley
Cinemas of London
3. ‘Book Adopter’ Bargain Books, by Adèle de Fontbrune
Find the alternatives to Vue across the capital.
4. DIY Fashion, by Jessica Atkinson
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5. Review: Volcano Theatre’s A Clockwork Orange, by Harriet Thompson Editor Zoe Tipler editor@roarnews.co.uk
Comment Editor Olivia Selley comment@roarnews.co.uk
Student Groups Editor Laura Arowolo students@raornews.co.uk
Arts Editor Theodora Wakeley arts@roarnews.co.uk
Music Editor Shivan Davis music@roarnews.co.uk
Head of Design Steph Fairbairn design@roarnew.co.uk
Comment Sub-editor Ben Jackson
Careers Editor Georgia Rajah
Features Editor Matt Lever features@roarnews.co.uk
Fashion and Lifestyle Editor Coryn Brisbane fashion@roarnews.co.uk
Film Editor Beth Cohon film@roarnews.co.uk
Sports Editor Charlotte Richardson sports@roarnews.co.uk
Film Sub-editor Maurice Loach
Proofing Editor Sofie Kouropatov proof@roarnews.co.uk
News Editor Luke Chattaway news@roarnews.co.uk
Proofing Sub-editor Max Edwards Legal and Advertising Fran Allfrey vpsme@kclsu.org Next deadline: 1st September But please send us your summer news, comment or other stories for roarnews.co.uk
Congratulations on your upComing graduation! Not only are you getting a degree from one of the finest universities, but it also means…
FrEE stuFF! Did you know that as soon as you finish your studies at King’s you automatically join the College’s alumni network?
membership lasts a lifetime and it’s FrEE! Plus you get all of these benefits, and more: • Library membership • College email address • King’s Connections: Career Directory • Exclusive discounts • Invites to special events • And most importantly, it will help you stay connected to the King’s community and the friends you made during your time here
so what’s the catch? there isn’t one! It’s as easy as 1, 2, 3…. 1) Go to www.alumni.kcl.ac.uk/graduateregistration 2) Update your details 3) Enjoy benefits, events and a lifetime connection to King’s Don’t forget to drop by the Alumni Office stand at your graduation ceremony to collect your free Reggie badge and find out more about the services on offer.
good luck and keep in touch! For further information please contact the Alumni Office on 020 7848 3053 or alumoff@kcl.ac.uk
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News
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Edited by Luke Chattaway news@roarnews.co.uk
Less Than Generous Government plans to curb charitable donations will impact King’s ability to fundraise. The current government plan is to cap tax relief at 25 per cent of income or £50,000, whichever is higher. Higher tax rate payers can claim relief of more than half the tax they pay on income which is donated to charity. However, they did appear to stand down in the face of opposition from charities, with Downing Street announcing that a ‘formal consultation’ on the measures will take place in the next few weeks. The Treasury previously said that it would discuss the measures with charities. Professor Rick Trainor said of previous government policy, “Tax incentives for donations became simpler and more generous, and these measures benefited all charitable causes, including universities.” The World Questions/King’s Answers campaign is one of the biggest and most imaginative fundraising appeals in higher education. King’s raised a total of £18.3m of new cash and pledges during the year. While just short of the £19.7m target, this was an excellent outturn and ensured that the public campaign got off to the best possible start. “It is believed by universities and the charity sector as a whole, the consequence of these changes will be that donors are discouraged to donate such large sums of money to charity,” says KCLSU President Hannah Barlow, “These donations greatly help King’s and without them it would be a lot harder to fund and continue to improve the quality of the institution.” King’s has opposed these changes and is one of many universities and charities who will be asking for these plans to be withdrawn.
Strand Quad to be Redesigned Sofie Kouropatov KCL plans for a £20 million project to redesign the ‘Quadrangle’ in the College’s founding campus are well underway. The work is partly in anticipation of 2,600 additional students expected to join the current Strand population of over 9,000 in the near future. A six-month survey of students and staff by Nomad RDC has just been finished, which will influence the design. The redesign will reportedly expand space for teaching and student facilities by 3,700 square metres. See www.kingsquadrangle.wordpress.com for more details.
Universities must declare hidden course costs!
Continued from Front Page
The recommendations that KCLSU President Hannah Barlow will be presenting to the College Education Committee (the highest Education committee at King’s) include: •
•
Students will be allocated printing credits every year to cover the cost of all formative and summative assessment that is required in printed format. This includes essays, dissertations and reports. If students are not provided with printed lecture notes then the College will also provide
them with enough print credits to make one copy of each set of lecture notes given electronically.
•
Students will be provided with electronic course packs free of charge. These course packs will contain all the essential reading they are required to undertake.
•
If a student requires a course pack in printed format they must pre-order their copy through their department.
•
If a student requires a CRB (Criminal Records Bureau) check to proceed with a part of
their course, the College will cover this cost.
•
To provide means-tested support in order to create provision for students to apply for financial aid with ‘optional’ course costs. This could include financial support for: trips, electives, specialist equipment, conferences and professional affiliation fees
You can find the full report and recommendations which Barlow will be presenting at www.kclsu.org/hideandseek. Roar! are excited that this Hidden Course costs issue appears to have gained momentum over the year, following on from Roar’s exclusive of November 2011 where we displayed the ‘true’ cost of courses at King’s. We pay a lot to be at this university, and whilst that’s not the be all and end all, we deserve much clearer guidance on what we can expect from King’s.
King’s World Competition Winner Announced Sofie Kouropatov The 2011 King’s World photographic competition, which invited students, staff and alumni to submit images related to the theme ‘How is King’s part of your world’, recently declared a winner out of over sixty submissions. The honour ultimately went to Naeem Meer, a 2010 graduate of the War Studies department. Meer’s winning submission, a black and white shot depicting people on the beach, was taken in Zanzibar during his post-graduation travels. Meer credits his experience at King’s with inspiring him to travel and explore Africa: ‘Not only did my degree teach me to think more critically, but it also enabled me to become more open-minded and curious about other realities in the world.’ Meer continues, ‘My time at King’s was determinant in my decision to travel across East Africa and my use of photography enabled me to discover and understand other cultures and other people.’ The winning photograph is currently on permanent display in the new Somerset House East Wing, which was leased by King’s and officially opened by the Queen this past February.
Above: an image taken from the NOMAD consultation blog. for the Quad redesign.
Publishing details of election fraud ‘not in the public interest’
Zoe Tipler
Roar! submitted a Freedom of Information request on the 15th of March requesting details of the KCLSU election fraud committed, asking not for the names of people who complained but simply the details of the rules that were broken and how. Peter Garrod, Director of Governance & Legal Affairs Management says, “Although the Returning Officer [is a member of King’s], the Returning Officer’s powers are established by the KCLSU in its by-laws, which describe the Returning Officer as ‘the official responsible for ensuring the processing of complaints about the conduct and administration of the election and the convening of the Elections Committee” “I do not believe that any public interest in the publication of what you have requested would outweigh the prejudice to the rights of the individuals concerned or the public interest in ensuring that the KCLSU is able to consider election-related complaints properly and fairly, which requires that complaints be investigated in a confidential manner.” To compare to a similar case, Oxford University Union Librarian Candidate, Madeline Grant, was fined £120 for breaking union election regulations. The details of what she did to break the rules (talking to the national press without the OU President’s permission) as well as the nature of her punishment are well known at Oxford.
News
December 13th- January 22nd 2012 Roar!,Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
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ARE YOU FIT TO SIT?
Fran Allfrey
By the time you’re reading this exam and revision season will be in full swing (yes, yes, medics and postgrads, we know some of you have later exams and coursework deadlines... but you could still be cracking on with things now!). Hopefully, you’ll be feeling just the usual amount of stress. ‘The fear’ can actually help with revision, as a small amount of stress hormones can actually improve memory, motivation and performace. All the same, at KCLSU the Officer team wanted to do something to help make things a little easier, and help you be ‘fit to sit’ in mind and body. Therefore, today marks the first day of Fit to Sit fortnight! For the next two weeks (14 - 25 May) we’ll be visiting the libraries at Waterloo (Mondays), Guy’s (Wednesdays) and Strand (Fridays) armed with freebies and goodies
WIN!
to help you feel better about the world. We’ll be giving away things including... MOMA breakfast pots, Thorntons chocolates and vouchers, Twinings herbal teas, Chilango vouchers, Kinetic Fitness Club free classes Tuesday and Thursday and gym day passes for the exam season, CALMzines, pens and bookmarks, soduku and wordsearches, and Cubana will be at Guy’s making smoothies. You’ll also be able to enter a competition to win LUSH goodies - the ultimate unwinding kit! But along with the fun things, we want to get a more serious message across too. The College has a policy that if you submit coursework, or sit an exam, you declare yourself ‘Fit to Sit’. This means if you sit an exam or submit coursework and you’re being academically affected by circumstances out of your control, you should tell King’s ASAP. If possible, before your exams or deadline day. Because appeals after you get the bad grade are much, much harder to resolve. You’re well in your rights seek out your options for mitigating circumstances. Come and chat to us about being Fit2Sit: email advice@ kclsu.org, or take a look at our kclsu.org/fit2sit for more info... and look after yourself this exam season!
FREE
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Comment
Anna Williamson
Britain’s Secret Slaves
‘Prostitutes and Beggars Bussed in for Olympics’, this was the headline of an article printed in the Metro on Wednesday 25th April. The language and tone of the article displays ignorance and prejudice which are both irresponsible and harmful. The choice of words and the insinuation of threat are potentially damaging to a cause that is in desperate need of our attention. Modern slavery is thriving in secret in our society. What Adrian Radnedge, the author of the article, failed to grasp is that these people are victims of a false employment scheme rather than being a sinister horde of ‘prostitutes, beggars and pickpockets’. The article reported that up to 60 people each night, a large majority of them Romanian, had been found camped on the streets of London clutching Google maps of Marble Arch. Westminster council declared that sleeping rough would not be tolerated in anticipation of the Olympic Games. The council and apparently the Metro are worried about the streets looking untidy and the supposed threat of pickpockets and beggars. The real issue, however, is why groups of people are showing up in London believing that they have a job, only to find it does not exist, or worse to find themselves in an employment from which there is no escape.
like slaves ever since they were ‘recruited’.
Modern slavery is not the same as it was in the eighteenth century, but just because someone is not in chains it does not mean that they are not slaves in every other sense of the word. Slavery has many forms in modern society and can go entirely unnoticed.
In view of Britain’s proud history as leaders of the abolition movement against slavery, the intolerance demonstrated is shameful. It is also uncharacteristic of our nation as campaigners for human rights. In 1807, the sterling work of Britain’s anti-slavery campaign resulted in the abolition of the transatlantic slave trade. Over 800, 000 men, women and children were emancipated from this grotesque system of trading in people. The slave trade ban, combined with actions of the abolitionist movement and pressure from the British government brought about the international decline of the ancient practise of slavery. This is surely one of the greatest British achievements to date. The Anti-slavery organisation in London (www.antislavery.org) is currently involved with the redrawing of migrant worker status law with policy makers in Westminster. This organisation actively campaigns for an end to modern slavery by lobbying governments to change policy, conducting research and collecting data. They also provide shelter and aid to trafficking victims.
When someone says slave, one imagines shackles, chains and probably a scene from Roman times or an African slave ship. Slavery, one would imagine, is a phenomenon which belongs to the past and has no place in our modern civilised world. This is unfortunately not the case. Slavery exists in Britain today. A few months ago two Vietnamese men arrived at the Citizens Advice Bureau in Central London. They had spent the last six months living and working at a London hotel. The men had each paid £18, 000 to recruitment agents in Vietnam and on arrival in Britain had been forced (under threat of physical violence to themselves and their families) to work with no pay and were not permitted to leave the premises. They were only given one meal a day. The men had managed to escape their employers through a bathroom window. They were extremely anxious for the safety of their families and of being tracked down by their employers. These men were victims of trafficking and had effectively lived
labour into the country. The latest UN statistics estimated that at any one time 2.5 million people across the world are trafficked and are living in conditions of forced labour or sexual exploitation. The hidden nature of trafficking makes it difficult to detect and its victims, therefore, hard to help. With this in mind, the Daily Mail-esque approach of the Metro article is clearly superficial and inhumane reporting.
There have been several arrests in the last few years of men who have trafficked up to 200 girls from Eastern Europe into Britain, forcing them to work in the sex trade. Although the illegal trade in sex workers is rife, the trafficking of forced labourers constitutes 40% of the total number of trafficked people into Britain and is perhaps more difficult to spot. Forced labourers may be working to protect families or pay back a debt; they may not realise they are being abused. Victims of trafficking are completely isolated through entrapment and often by a language barrier. Trafficking is an increasingly common form of bringing forced
The upcoming Olympic Games will present more problems for these campaigners. The tightening of border controls can have an inflammatory effect on trafficking as it forces it to become more covert. Negative media coverage of migrants bought in on false employment schemes, who could just as easily have been victims of trafficking, is highly detrimental to the plight of these vulnerable people. The Olympic Games are an opportunity for Britain to show off all its glorious past, present and future. This should include our historic role as defenders of human rights and champions of the oppressed peoples of the world. http://e-edition.metro. co.uk/2012/04/25/22.html
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Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Comment Edited by Olivia Selley comment@roarnews.co.uk
A Job Well Done Olivia Selley By now most people are familiar with the name Anish Kapoor, the 2002 Turner prizewinner and the artist behind the Orbit Tower proudly erupting beside our Olympic Stadium. But perhaps fewer are aware of the other architects contributing to the Olympic city. The Park has been open to visitors ahead of the August games playing host to a range of ‘London Prepares’ events. I made the journey up to Stratford this week to watch Germany v. Australia men’s hockey. Before visiting the park I had, almost without any shadow of doubt joined the anti-Olympic camp, chirping “I don’t want to be anywhere near London during the Olympics”. A camp that I think has become clichéd rather quickly. Upon arriving at the park you are greeted by what is apparently airport security. But it is more thorough than any airport I’ve been through; I was searched and questioned, ever so politely though. We were then directed to the right stadium – apparently half an hour walk from the entrance. Walking though the park is a journey of discovery, the aquatics centre spans the canal, Kapoor’s Orbit towers against a backdrop of the main stadium and modern wind turbines spin soundlessly overhead, illuminated in blues and reds. Carrying on past the stadium the ground turns springy and multi coloured and there are manicured lawns leading towards The Pringle, which actually looks far more like
the hull of a huge ship. The entire place is an architectural masterpiece. Grown up out of nowhere, entirely synthetic, it has an incredibly surreal, futuristic feel. Canary Warf on the horizon pales into insignificance. Sitting in the hockey stands looking out at the cityscape one is truly humbled. When all eyes turn to London in awe of the incredible human accomplishment of the finest athletes I hope the architectural accomplishments do not go unnoticed. In photographs Kapoor’s Orbit does little for me. I considered it a blight on the landscape, this sprawling Meccano mess. In real life it is quite beautiful. When I left the stadium the sun was setting, making it so bizarrely yellow that it gave the buildings a golden glow; a shopping complex (Westfield) has never looked so pretty. The army of staff kept wishing everyone a good night and safe journey. One staff member had a megaphone and was jokingly begging the crowd not to leave, bemoaning that the day had come to an end. If everyone who goes there over the course of the games has a similar experience I have every faith that August 2012 will be a hassle- and harassment-free month. Everyone will say “the English are so friendly and helpful, and London -what a wonderful city” – and we will all be able to be proud of that. Let the games begin.
Harmful Porn? Joe Ralley There has recently been concern about the accessibility of online pornography to children. Make no mistake, that time-honoured tradition of discovering dirty magazines in bushes has been well and truly outmoded by high speed broadband. YouTube-styled porn websites such as Pornhub, YouPorn and Redtube provide vast amounts of x-rated material free of charge and on demand, and more young people are viewing more explicit content than ever before. I find something worrying about this, but does porn actually have the power to harm children? A recent government report concluded that online porn is a ‘poor sex educator.’ Presumably the worry is that today’s youth grow up thinking that sex is a purely robotic and joyless affair, involving either a teacher or step-mum. I have no doubt people are influenced by the content they view, but as sex works by providing pleasure to parties involved, I would wager that any of the ‘lessons’ learnt from porn are subject to a Darwinian-esque survival-of-the-pleasurable, where poor sex is either simply discouraged or not propagated, and the only harm done is to the instigator’s ego, which probably needed a clipping anyway. Where I do see potential for harm
is with more immediate distress caused simply by exposure to an inappropriate image, and I mention this particularly in mind of violent and extreme pornography. I surveyed the homepages of the three most used free porn-tube sites and found links overtly referencing abuse, force and rape on each site; incest and prostitution were also recurring themes, and a significant share of videos related to cheating or getting revenge on partners. In fact, just a moment’s disinterested glance is enough to gain a sense of the debasing and degrading nature of online porn in general. Presumably this kind of content is disturbing to most adults, let alone children who lack the kind of life experience necessary to understand exactly what is being portrayed when they watch ‘Schoolgirl Gets Exploited by Teacher’, and why some people might enjoy watching such a thing. Unsuitability is not a vacuous concept; the reason we don’t let our 10 year olds watch Inglorious Bastards is because we believe in the harm caused by the things we deem unsuitable. But evidently violent pornography is in demand and it must be providing many people with pleasure. In fact, a whole range of commonly considered perverse or illegal
sexual acts are continually found topping lists of popular sexual fantasies for both men and women.
Are webfilters enough, or should we do more to protect children? Unlike garden-variety pornography, however, extreme and violent videos risk much more harmful consequences if viewers decide to use them as inspiration for real-life. However it is true that we pay to watch violent and gory films at the cinema - and enjoy them too - without once feeling the urge to go home and buy a big knife or a Berretta. Both the cinema and pornography provide some kind of primal gratification and it seems plausible that we can do so without developing any dark and violent intentions.
Of course, the experience of viewing a feature film and viewing pornography is not same thing. Porn appeals to a much baser appetite and sexual gratification is not an intellectual pursuit; one is less likely to fully cognize the nature of the images one encounters online. Subconscious associations naturally form between the gratification and the images that cause the gratification, and porn users may desire to seek out the same sources of pleasure in real life as in virtual reality. Also, there is a distinction between fantasising about extreme or violent sex and actually seeing it occur between real people. A virtual rape scene, although fictional, may represent a step towards blurring lines between reality and fantasy. It would be one leap of logic too far to suggest that this might encourage people to carry out their violent fantasies in life, but certainly the act of witnessing real people performing fake violent sexual acts might encourage viewer to perform them too. Whether faked or not, whatever the intention, this amounts to risky
behaviour and the likelihood of harm or injury is clearly increased. Accessibility is key, and, unfortunately, the Internet being the unfathomable, sprawling phenomenon it is, there are few powers available to limit it. If one has the inclination to watch extreme and violent pornography, there’s nothing stopping you. As for children, we do have responsibility to protect them from harm. Webfilters will go some way but we should accept that if a person intends to view such content online, one way or another they will find it. All we can do is prevent those who don’t wish to from stumbling upon it. On our side we should make open and honest information about pornography as accessible to children as porn itself, and we should encourage porn content providers to impose stricter age restrictions, or at least limit damaging exposure by removing extreme and violent images from their home pages. Either way, our appeal should begin with that classic hysterical plea to think of the children!
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Comment
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Comment Sub-Editor Ben Jackson
“IS ONE TAKING THE PISS?”
Rachael Krishna
“
We love a party, pork pies and Pimms
FAIR ENOUGH
The excessive coverage of the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee as well as some of the spectacles planned for the upcoming celebration has led some to argue that the measures are excessive. A one thousand boat flotilla, a picnic, a concert and a portrait made up of cakes are just a few of the events planned in the coming months. Justified? Yes. Why? Because we’re British. We do wacky excess wonderfully. Brilliantly, even. As Britons we love a party. Any excuse to bring out cucumber sandwiches, pork pies, Pimms and to sit in waterproofs whilst singing ‘Rule Britannia’. It’s in our genes; we are brought up with images of V-E day and the Queen’s coronation and the wonderful street parties that took place. Our image of British pride is streets covered in union flags whilst the old dance with the young and lovers back from war embrace. We may be in 2012, World War II is 70 years ago and we’re in the midst of an economic crisis but surely that’s reason enough to have a jolly old knees up? In times of hardship we turn back to fond memories and seek comfort in the food we love. The British diet is defined by picnics and the jubilee celebrations are all about that. Now we move onto the subject of money, which is harder to justify. The Queen’s waxwork in popular tourist venue Madame Tussauds is getting a £150,000 makeover. This will cause controversy, but in my opinion, it’s worth it for old
Queen Lizzy isn’t it? I mean, she’s been through a lot with this country and yet she is still this wonderfully posed and refined enigma. People say the monarchy is out of date, but the monarchy is what defines us as Great Britain. Last year the royal wedding brought us together, celebrating what is unique about our country. This year we get to do it all over again, whilst not secretly being jealous about Kate stealing our future husband...
We love bit of
a
nostalgia and there is nothing more British or nostalgic than a jubilee. Yes it will cost money, but that doesn’t stop us when we splash out on our own birthdays, so why not our favourite royal’s birthday? I say, bring on the celebrations and congrats for 60 years on the throne, your Majesty.
BAD TASTE This is not going to be an antiRoyalist diatribe. I just think that at a time of huge cuts to the entire public sector, a pageant that the Guardian estimates will cost at least £1.2 billion just cannot be justified. In a year when the cuts are really hitting Britain’s arts sector incredibly hard, leading to hundreds of groups and organisations having to close or drastically reduce their output, I can’t stand public money being spent on a Jubilee concert featuring Ed Sheeran; it’s a little bit like replacing the Mona Lisa with a sixyear-old child’s doodle. However, this is not my main c o n cern. If we’re going t o
celebrate someone for making Britain great, the Queen would be nowhere near the top of my list. Sure, I believe her longevity should be celebrated – after all, she does a lot for tourism, and she’s kept Britain’s hatmakers in business for years. Then again, there are many other figures and groups that have done just as much
Sam Spencer
for Britain. Where, for example, is the parade for the 45th anniversary of Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band? Surely the Beatles have done just as much for international views of Britain and tourism, with their albums often topping lists of the best-loved and best-selling albums in the world. What’s more, what we would be celebrating there is talent, rather than just lasting sixty years in a job that you were born into. Ask someone, British or foreign, what the Beatles have brought the world, and they could tell you: the majestic White Album. The rooftop concert. ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’. Ask someone what the Queen has brought us... um... the Queen’s speech? Brian May playing the National Anthem on the top of Buckingham palace (surely one of the cringiest performances of all time)? Hardly calls for a multimillion pound pageant, does it? So by all means, celebrate the Queen if you want to in the comfort of your own home. But if public money is being spent, it should be to celebrate those talented Britons who have led to our often worldleading status in arts and innovation, whilst actually putting money back into the UK through taxes. Give James Dyson a parade. Vivienne Westwood. Tim Berners-Lee, David Bowie or any number of great Britons before you even consider giving the Queen one. Hell, even give Helen Mirren a parade; at least her Queen won an Oscar!
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Helen Mirren: at least her Queen won an Oscar
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We all know it’s the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee this year. There’s going to be a portrait of her made up of 3,120 cakes, one for each week of her reign. Do we need that many cakes? Probably not. In anticipation of this Royal flotilla that’s going to clog up the Thames, businesses and homeowners along the route have been encouraged to decorate their buildings in red, white and blue. How about just red, to indicate what colour everyone’s bank balances are, while she’s swanning up the river wearing a million diamonds and a cow? In response to calls for professionals to “DIP HER IN WAX!” Madam Tussauds has done a £150,000 makeover of her waxwork. It will be placed in the Royal area alongside her husband, the Duke of Casual Racism. (On a serious note, can anyone tell me the appeal of paying to go and stand next to a waxwork of a celebrity?) Also, mental chef Heston Blumenthal is creating a picnic for the Royal concert. So that’ll be snail porridge and steamed shit then. The Royal Mail has introduced six new stamps for the occasion with a fresh design; is that why we’re now paying 14p more for first class? And to top it off, they’ve only gone and splashed her face on the front of Buckingham Palace, possibly to let the American tourists know who lives there. In this final Burning Issue of the year Ben asks, “are these celebrations GOOD FOR THE COUNTRY, or is it in bad taste for the Queen and her ilk to flaunt their wealth while the rest of us are moved to Stoke like evacuees and forced to eat cold pasties?”
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Student Groups www.roarnews.co.uk will still be alive and kicking over the summer! So let us know what your team or society gets up to - whether you’re off abroad helping orphans or raising money, or whether you’re notching up the points in summer sporting events! students@roarnews.co.uk
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Viva Las Vegas!
(with added gin, no doubt) Dazzi, Tommaso After last year’s success, the GKT Summer Ball is back!!
Following much deliberation we decided on a Vegas theme rather than a ‘big name’ act, allowing us to splash out on a fantastic venue. This year the ball will take place in the stunning Grand Connaught Rooms in Covent Garden. The room will look sensational with Vegas themed décor, casino tables, a Vegas themed photo booth, show girls, a vodka ice luge, two chocolate fountains, a popcorn machine and a candyfloss machine. The lack of a big name act does not mean you will not be entertained. We are lucky enough to have the KCL Swing Band playing throughout dinner followed by the increasingly successful Kings of Soul who played at the Summer Ball fundraiser open mic night earlier in the year. Dance Soc and Breaking KCL will also make an appearance, as well as Magic Soc’s outstanding magician Joe Stammeijer. ‘It’s going to be debauchery in a dinner suit’, said Mark Shimmings, MedSoc’s outgoing president. There is a lot of pressure to make this year more successful than the last, nevertheless our ticket sales have been phenomenal. With still just over four weeks to go until the big day, we have already sold in excess of 550 tickets! SO GET YOURS QUICK!!
Last year’s swanky affair at the Troxy was a huge success... here it is looking smart before the carnage began...
NUSKing’Conference April 2012: s involved in national decision making!
Dele Akinyemi
My first NUS Conference - done and dusted! I’m just going to tell you guys a bit about why I decided to go, the experience and the take-home messages I derived after all of four (long!) minutes of careful mental deliberation. Why? At the start of the year, I really wanted to get more involved in the decision-making progress as a student here. I also wanted to have the opportunity to implement change on a national scale, especially because I find that health students (such as myself) are often under-represented at such forums. Far too often, we as students are told WHAT will change, and are left wondering WHY or WHO to hold accountable for such changes. This was my chance to gain answers to these questions... Conference On arrival, the vibrant nature of the venue and its surroundings overwhelmed me. Seeing the numerous election campaigns in full-flow as well as the various student groups really helped me to appreciate the gravity of the occasion and the im-
NOW RECRUITING: Freshers’ Crew 2012
portance it bore to everyone. It was at this point If you always know the best places to go around King’s and London for a good time, love meeting that conference really kicked into life for me. new people, and want the chance to make Freshers’ 2012 really special... Read on! Being an NUS Delegate also means you’re a voting student council member. As KCLSU have aligned their motions/amendments and voting structures with that of the NUS, my SC experience thus far equipped me with the training to both follow and participate in the conference effectively.
KCLSU are about to launch their search for the Freshers’ Crew 2012. It’s a voluntary role, but you’ll get to spend September re-living your Freshers and giving newbies the best possible welcome. Possible activities you’ll be involved with include: being a friendly face at daytime or non alcoholic events; hanging out at Halls running BBQs and daytime or evening events; leading tours around the sights and attractions of London. If you’re really keen, there will also be the opportuity to lead your own Freshers’ activities, or even co-ordinate a crew team for particular events.
All Freshers’ Crew will get training opportunities such as event planning and leadership skills too, and other perks include free Tutu’s event passes and a ‘thank you’ dinner at the end of Freshers! Several motions which King’s stu- Formal applications are opening soon. So register your interest by emailing Fran at vpsme@kclsu. dent council had ap- org and make sure you don’t miss out on your chance to have fun, help new students feel at home, proved were debat- notch up some volunteering hours and build up your skills for your CV! ed and voted upon over the course of the three days and we were very glad indeed to see most discussed KCLSUproposed motions passed!
‘Take-home’s 1. I WILL definitely attempt to return next year (armed with motions of my own) 2. ALL students should make a conscious effort to be aware of the NUS and its activities; this IS the main stage for change!
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Careers
Careers Section Georgia Rajah, Careers Editor
From the Classroom to the Lecture Theatre: Roar! talks to King’s Professors about Teaching lessen the pleasure of the research work. Still, I think of the time I spend researching as a privilege.
What difficulties or challenges you’ve faced as a teacher?
With many of the deadlines for Masters programs and PhDs still open, many students may be looking to continue with their studies. This may be in the hope of perhaps gaining better qualifications for which to seek a job with, or perhaps to pursue a career in teaching at university. A variety of professors from our very own Kings College London shared with Roar! their experiences within this profession. Did you enter upon your masters or PhD knowing that you wanted to teach at university?
terial I teach and I really want my students not just to enjoy reading the material but for it to raise questions for them, and to open up ideas that will stay in their minds. The research feeds your teaching of course, but I’m not often teaching directly to my current research. In that sense research is quite private. It’s wonderful to work alone in libraries and archives. There’s tremendous pressure to publish constantly, of course, and that can really
I think that in recent years teaching has been undervalued at the expense of research, though now there are signs that the pendulum is swinging back a bit. I do love teaching and think I’ve been incredibly lucky actually to be paid for doing something I love. I’ve learned so much from my students over the years. Do you think it takes a specific sort of person to be able to be a good teacher? Is loving the subject enough? I don’t think there’s a particular personality type that can automatically be expected to be a “good teacher”, whatever that means; indeed I think it’s good for students to be exposed to a wide range of teachers
with different teaching styles, perspectives, and priorities. What is important, though, is openness, to new ideas, to being challenged and stretched, and to be willing to question everything rather than taking everything at face value.
to get a job. If you do think of doing a PhD, think about how marketable your proposed subject area is going to make you. What have you wanted to study most as a student? That’s where the jobs will be.
Is there any advice you could give to students considering a career in teaching at university?
For those still unsure whether to pursue a career in teaching, remember that there are a multitude of professors here at Kings College who would welcome the opportunity to share their own experiences in the profession.
I began an M.A. with the intention of teaching at the University level. What is the most rewarding thing is about your job? Are you drawn more to the teaching aspect itself or to your research?
My advice would be that it’s worth considering, but not setting your heart on achieving. It’s getting ever more difficult
It’s not either/or teaching and research really. I’ve always loved teaching: I love the ma-
Reflection and Retrospection: Careers Section Review
With the final issue of Roar! having come round so soon, it seems only natural to reflect upon this years careers events that have made their way to Kings.
Before Christmas, representatives from Cosmic Inc shared with Roar! their experiences in setting up a business. Bartle Bogle Hegarty also came to talk to Kings about the benefits of working in advertising. Interestingly however, out of all the events covered by Roar! this past academic year, ‘For the Record: A Starter Kit for the Music Industry’ had the biggest student turnout.
In the New Year, Roar! was able to speak to executives from The Telegraph Media Group, who were able to shed light on the interview process when applying for a job. A recurrent theme that employers have seemed to stress throughout the year is to be prepared to set yourself apart from other applicants, focus upon what makes you different (and don’t forget to make sure your grammar is flawless on your application!)
When Andrew O’Hagan and Jonathan Riley came to talk about publishing and writing, students gained an insight into the rigorous competition in the publishing industry. (For those seeking more information on pursuing a career as a writer, remember O’Hagan is a teacher at Kings.)
The Mellow 9 Productions presentation had perhaps the smallest turn-out of students. However the representatives were able to share with students the difficult reality of trying to break into a film industry, which in their opinion is pretty near “non-existent” in the UK. Nevertheless they stressed that the industry is worth getting into if you enjoy film. Their advice: if you want to be a scriptwriter – write… If you want to be a filmmaker – make films. As music representatives from the event ‘For the Record’ stressed: “start the job before you’ve got it”.
make sure that their subject area will also be marketable to other employers. The job market is already extremely competititve, it can’t hurt to keep your options open.
For those who are going to be graduating this year but still haven’t secured a job, there are many different groups online that can offer help for when you leave university. The Careers Group offers a service that can be found at www.gradclub.co.uk that provides graduates with professional careers advice and resources to recent students at a discounted rate. There are also various different networking sites that you can contact employers on. Alexi from Mellow 9 Productions confessed to even reaching out to employers via social networking sites such
For those considering a career in teaching at university, Professor’s at Kings stressed that students considering applying for a Masters or PhD should
as facebook. One site that is particularly useful however is LinkedIn. The site allows you to load you CV onto your profile and presents your relevant experience in a coherent and accessible format to possible employers. On the site you can keep track of various companies and network with other employers. Furthermore LinkedIn also provides suggestions for job applications that you may be qualified for. Ultimately the job market is continuing to be an intensely competitive arena. The main thing to remember is just to keep plugging away. Use all the resources available to you and if you need to talk to someone, remember - the KCL careers department’s main office is located at the Strand Campus on The Bridge – level 1, Macadam Building.
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Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
FEATURES Edited by Matt Lever features@roarnews.co.uk
HOUSE HUNTING HELL and safety in your new lodgings: you know, fire exits, Yale locks, that sort of thing. It’s time to get out.
Matt Lever
I hate estate agents. Unfortunately, there comes that time of year when I’m forced to interact with them. Even more unfortunately, this coincides with the time I have to prove I’ve learnt something after another two terms of university education. Yes, even though the mental scars of last year’s onslaught are still fresh, the twin crises of housing and exams are back with an even more ruthless vengeance. It should be said that I don’t hate all estate agents. One of my best friends works part time as one, and she’s delightful. However, the majority of them seem at best incompetent and at worst money-grabbing, feckless thieves who would quite happily pressure you into some godforsaken Bethnal Green hovel just to fill a quota for their next worthless promotion. Let me take this opportunity to voice my particular distrust for Black Katz. They call me up to inform me earnestly that I really should be panicking that I’m not already waving a signed contract around for somewhere to live in five - yes, five - months time, like everyone else. As it happens, the slimeball knows exactly the place for me. It’s above my budget, but hey, I can’t be picky with so little time left. It almost makes you wish for some hapless goon, but even they have to arrive at your flat-viewing in some gaudy, ostentatious company car as though they own the area. Saqib (not his real name) rolls up to the ex-council estate off Holloway Road we’re waiting outside in an enormous Mercedes and almost trips over his even more oversized suit as he fumbles with the keys and tries to remember
The only reason I went this year was to pick up the pack they give you as soon as you get in with a list of all the properties on ULU’s database. Of course, I realise afterwards that this is all available online, but oh well, I wouldn’t have been doing anything else that morning; it’s not like I have exams or anything. The database this year was not as fruitful as the last. I think, despite only having lived in London for a couple of years now, I’ve noticed the effect of inflation on property prices. It’s ridiculous. £120 per week in literally any other city in the UK affords you the nicest areas on offer; in central London, it barely gets you beyond a knife-addled estate in Elephant & Castle. Of course, there’s always the option of paying less and living out of the centre, but I’d honestly rather shoot myself than hand over a small fortune to TfL for a season ticket.
Penthouse rise: my domestic aspirations for next year, coincidentally also the cover for that Streets album the code for the door. It’s fine though; once past the occupants (he’s forgotten to tell them we’re coming), he is excellent at pointing out that this is the kitchen and that’s an adequately sized hob. Yes Saqib, we can see that. I’m pretty sure he’d never actually been inside the flat before, a suspicion confirmed by the three London Met students that watched, cagey and bemused, as we peered into their bedrooms. Calling us a week later to enquire whether we were still considering it presumably means he inspired
a similar confidence in future visitors. But perhaps the lowest depths of property hell are reached at the annual ULU Housing Fair. This event always seems strangely lacking in prior notice considering the huge swathes of people that flock to Malet Street that morning, and despite arriving before it was due to open, I waited well over an hour before getting inside. Given that there’s no other reason anyone would go to ULU ever, I guess the place doesn’t quite know how to deal
with those sorts of vast visitor numbers. Inside, you’re shuffled along in a tiny room as smug estate agents cackle at the captive market before them and their little desks. If you sign up with us, they say, you get this keyring or that packet of Haribo. It’s like Freshers’ Fair all over again, except this time you’re sure everyone is hating it as much as you are. The last straw comes at the end of this infernal labyrinth when some ageing council worker stops you and asks if you’ve given proper consideration to health
After the simplicity of halls in first year, this is my second go at the perilous game of house hunting in London. If I had any advice for those who’ve yet to find somewhere, it’d be to start early, though I guess it’s too late for such exhortations now. Don’t bother trying to see everything; things go so quickly that if you see somewhere you like, take it. And make use of the housing help that the university and ULU can offer you. I’m going to ignore my own advice and lack of accommodation for next year, and leave it until a trawl of PrimeLocation.com when I’m next bored and procrastinating. And I guess there’s always Gumtree.
TO OXBRIDGE OR NOT TO OXBRIDGE? Katrina Wood
With current applicants expecting to pay fees of up to £9000 per year from this September, it appears more important than ever that students choose carefully which university is for them. But how should the choice be made? Last week, Jonny Griffiths, a sixth form maths teacher, was heavily criticised for suggesting a student would be better off at Bangor and have an enjoyable university experience rather than going down the Oxbridge route. Nick Collins of The Telegraph wrote a particularly negative response, including critical comments from politicians, such as Elizabeth Truss, MP for South West Norfolk, reportedly saying that she was “horrified to hear of an enthusiastic student being discouraged from aiming for the top”. Interestingly, no student was interviewed for the article, nor was it pointed out that in a world
where student satisfaction now plays quite a big part in the league tables, Mr Griffiths may not be the enemy of the prospective student but instead the voice of what many are thinking.
Griffiths is not the first to lash out at the view that top grade students must go to Oxbridge, with Elly Nowell, 19, sending her highly publicised rejection letter to Magdalen College, Oxford, because it “did not quite meet the standards” of her other university choices. Nowell is not the only student to have reacted to Oxbridge in this way, with it being suggested that every year several students who are accepted choose to reject their offer and attend another university. Nowell, too, was criticised, with Philip Hensher of The Independent accusing her of not being clever in the decision but simply making a “mistake”. Statistically, institutions with a greater academic reputation such as Oxbridge can provide a student
with better job prospects, yet does Nowell’s decision really count as a mistake? Griffiths stands by his comments, saying that the student should still push themselves academically at whatever institution they attend, posing the question as to whether it is better to gain a first at a lower rated university (with a first at any institution arguably a challenge to achieve) than to perform less well at a higher rated university. Luckily for the majority of King’s students, the stressful process of applying to university is a distant memory, and those applying for postgraduate courses will be far more clued up on making the choice of where to go than they were before starting undergraduate study. However, if encouraging others to choose KCL, it seems unlikely that the argument would be based entirely on the academic status of the university. It would clearly be wrong to encourage prospective students to come based on the ‘fun factor’ alone, yet it is undeniable that
despite a few being naturally able to stay motivated through any kind of stress, most need a comfortable and enjoyable environment to perform at their best. Although it would be wrong to criticise those who take on the challenge of the most academically challenging institutions, it would be equally unfair to disapprove of the A* student who turns a w a y from the league tables a n d chooses a university that just feels right for them.
‘Not worth it’: was Elly Nowell right to reject Oxford?
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
FEATURES
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So far in 2012... Anissa Putois As the academic year draws to a close, let’s take a look back at the oddest and most unusual news stories of 2012.
No name has been given to the child yet, though his parents have nicknamed him ‘jhatpat’, the Hindi word for fast, because he was faster than the train. What we don’t know is whether the kid will benefit from free subway travel for the rest of his life? BORAT ANTHEM USED AT OFFICIAL CEREMONY
Sacha Baron Cohen would be so proud.
Making for quite the awkward blunder, the parody anthem of Kazakhstan from the film Borat was used at the Arab Shooting Championship in Kuwait on 24th March.
BORN IN THE NEW YORK SUBWAY The 30 minute long train journey from Harrison, New Jersey to Manhattan on the morning of 17th January may have flown by for some. But for one couple, it was long enough for their baby to be born, right there in the carriage. The 31-year-old woman had been on her way to visit her doctor when she started feeling contractions. The train conductor announced that the train would skip all further stops till Manhattan, in an effort to get the woman to the hospital as quickly as possible. It was to no avail, as less than twenty minutes after the couple boarded the train, the baby was born and safely nestled in his father’s arms.
HUGGING FORBIDDEN New Jersey middle school Principal Tyler Blackmore sparked sniggers when he announced a ban on hugging following incidents of ‘unsuitable physical interactions’. The sixth- to eighth-graders will not face suspension if caught hugging each other, nor has a specific policy preventing hugging yet been devised. However, this ‘no hugging’ rule seems to have spread like wildfire, and a handful of other schools across the United States have in turn instituted a ban on hugs. CAVIAR EATING CONTEST
In a great show of carriage spirit, one young woman offered her jacket to wrap the newborn in, while others offered help and encouragements.
49 year-old Alexander Lavrov won the world’s first-ever caviar speedeating contest after having guzzled over £3000 worth of the pricey fish
Life Lessons from an Ex-Con Lee Watkins
“Going to prison was like winning the lottery for me,” the Turk remarks. “It showed me who my real friends are. It educated me.” He is a slightly soft man, with hair more white than gray. He enjoys talking, the sort of person who pronounces ‘girls’ as ‘gels’ and frequently uses the double negative (“He hadn’t done nothing”). The son of Turkish Cypriots, he turned to crime in his teens and moved from car theft to financial fraud as he got older. Sadik was kind enough to share some of the highlights of his life – prison, a criminal career and fatherhood – over a pint at the Crown and Anchor in Covent Garden. Lee: So you’re glad you went to prison? Sadik: It changed my game big time. [Before I went to prison,] I would go from nice to like a lunatic in two seconds. [From the prison debating club] I learned to keep my voice low and not… I wasn’t getting my way. But I
gotta understand that you have a way too. So I’ve got to be level with that, know what I mean? L: I was going to say, there’s a quote from the Bible where Jesus says, “To the Jews I was a Jew, and to the gentiles – S: I was a gentile! Yeah, I have heard that. Someone’s actually said that to me. I used to flip. Big time. L: So you used to have a temper, you mean? And prison resolved that for you? S: Yeah, I suppose you could call it a temper. And you know what I noticed: we’re all the same. We’re all in the same shit, really. It’s just the title. We’re all thieves, at the end of the day, and we’re all in the same place. It made me more receptive to other people. Prison made me easier to talk to. L: You’ve said you didn’t like your teachers at school. What kind of education have you had? S: I got no education. None. I did go to school, but in those days we had teachers that were from out the military. The war had been over for fifteen years, they had all these army
A shame, in my opinion, as this pedagogic bad-ass radar would have been a terrific new way to enforce roadsafety. eggs. The event consisted of twelve contestants whose names had been drawn from a lottery, and the winner collected 10,000 rubles (£210) and many more jars of the prized delicacy. The organising party, high-class Moscow restaurant ‘Apartment’, stated that “in Texas, people organise hot dog and hamburger eating contests. In Moscow, people eat black caviar instead.”
Lyrics such as “Kazakhstan, Kazakhstan, you very nice place” and “Kazakhstan greatest country in the world, all other countries are run by little girls” rang out when Maria Dmitrienko, the Kazakhstani shooting gold-medalist, collected her award. After apologising for the major mistake, the event organisers blamed the error on a simple downloading muddle.
the mishap: at the inauguration of the said law-enforcement device, the employee had wanted to prove that the matrix text was too small by writing the insult. Embarrassingly, the content was not replaced until the firm received a number of complaints from vexed drivers.
While the athlete took the musical gaffe surprisingly well, several Kazakhstani officials did not, upon hearing that ‘Kazakhstan’s prostitutes cleanest in the region’ through the speakers.
people who became teachers, and they were more disciplinarians than teachers. There were still bombed-out houses when I was eight, nine, ten. They weren’t teachers. They were ex-army…whatever. It was the cane. It made us into what we are, because it was their way or no way. I’m severely dyslexic. [I was] called stupid, in those days. Special needs classes, because they didn’t know nothing about that. They would stand you up in a chair for days on end, for being bad in those days. Used to stand me up in a chair all day long, counting. I couldn’t count. I can’t count, even now. L: You can’t count? S: No, not really. I can count up to about a hundred and then I’m – I can’t – I have to think, what I say. L: How do you operate if you can’t count? S: I rely on other people to count for me. I know the twenties, five, the hundreds. I bundle the four twenties and put a five the opposite way, so I know that’s a hundred. They’ll say, “You’ve been paid by the Turk, you can tell by his money,” ‘cause I’ve
Tell that to the 100,000 homeless of the Russian capital. RUDE RADAR Up until last weekend, reckless drivers passing through Eaucourt-surSomme, in the North of France, found their speeding met with a sign that proclaimed: ‘Fuck you’. While it is not uncommon to be insulted at the wheel in France (especially in the capital), to have the abuse come from an automatic radar can be quite surprising. The radar has since been repaired and now displays a far more polite message ‘Careful, too fast’. As for the culprit, he was identified as an employee of the firm that manufactures the radar. His boss explained folded it. L: What was prison like? S: You appreciate everything you could’ve easily had before. Like toothpaste. You appreciate having toothpaste. The hardest thing is the loneliness. Getting into bed by yourself and waiting for the bell to ring at six o’clock in the morning. You’re thinking of your family and children. You can’t wait to be on the phone to them. I’ve seen people in prison, going in there for six months, they stay there for ages, I mean years. Because they’re selling heroin in there, that’s why. Because they earn so much more, it’s unbelievable, they stay in prison. They get the fat blokes – some of the blokes have got a massive belly and it flops over – so what they do is they put the heroin, they stick it under their belly, it holds it down, and they get searched and they can’t find nothing. I’m telling you! That’s what they do! I’ve never been able to get hold of the fact that these blokes stay in prison to sell heroin or coke or whatever, because they make more money. I think, fuckin’ hell. L: How did your family feel about you being in prison? S: It affected the relationship [with my significant other] big time. Because the first time she knew about it was when I phoned her up. I said
Anyway, if the world really does come to an end at some point this year, at least it’s been an interesting one so far.
THANK YOU! I’d like to say a quick thank you to everyone who has contributed to the Features section and indeed the whole newspaper throughout the year. Speaking for this section, I’ve been able to publish some fantastic pieces due to the overall high standard of all submissions. Thank you, and have a great summer!
“Honey, I’m in the nick.” So she thought I was at the police station. I said “No, not really,” and I thought Loverboy [a friend] had gone round to tell her. But apparently he didn’t have the heart to tell her. L: How do you break that to somebody? S: Quite stupidly, the way I done it. That’s how mistrust comes in. Unfortunately, it’s a hard lesson to learn. We’re not together anymore. Since then, I’ve learned, no secrets. L: What lessons do you have to teach your kids? S: I’ve gotten to talking to my children like they’re my mates and not like my children. I’m trying to be a bit more ‘Father Friendly.’ L: Do you see your kids having the kind of career that you’ve had? S: No. My girls are really quiet…I was the complete opposite. I make sure their homework’s all done, I spend 300 pounds a month on extracurricular classes… I was craving for an education, didn’t get it, so I’m buying it now [for them.] We make our way through a few drinks, a small meal and a snack. Towards the end of our conversation, he imparts a pearl of wisdom. “I don’t punish my kids,” Sadik says. “Punishment never improved me.”
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Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Olympic Alternatives
ALTERNATIVE CINEMA Beth Cohon, Film Ed
The Olympics this summer are bound to bring droves of tourists—loud, sports-whooping, packs of them—to central London. So if you’re going to be in the city during that time and aren’t keen to stand in a half an hour queue for the tube to your favorite cinema in Leicester Square just to find that your show is sold out, then this list of smaller, independent cinemas is for you. These hidden gems are Londoners’ favorite haunts, and their cosy and unique decor—not to mention the unlikelihood that the tourists traveling from Buckingham Palace to Trafalgar Square and Leicester Square to Covent Garden will happen across them— make them worth the price. The Coronet This old Victorian theatreturned-cinema has a rich history, as it was frequented by both King Edward VII, and Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant in the film Notting Hill. However, most exciting about this cinema are its low student prices. Go there any Monday with your student ID to see a film for just £3.50. www.coronet.org/ If you’re a curmudgeon like me when it comes to spending my precious pounds, then the Lexi, which offers dining services during the film, may have you feeling less guilty: all their profits go to a South African charity, The Sustainability Institute. Not to mention, the Lexi, in Kensal Rise, is a far trot from central London, so in this intimate little cinema, you’ll get a unique experience out of the crowd-faring way. The best part: each film is introduced, and if you stay afterwards during one of the Lexi film club nights, you may get to enjoy a Q&A with the direc-
the airport well before it becomes one sprawling refugee camp for all the passengers of cancelled or delayed flights. The Mediterranean is the obvious place to go in July, so perhaps escape to the Catalonian coast for a month or so. I’m told Borneo is at its best during our summer as well, which you might be able to tie in with some downtime on a Thai island. Perhaps a Kenyan safari might be in order, or if you’re willing to put it a bit of overtime now, the Caribbean season will be nearing its end, which means sun and maybe even a discounted hotel deal. I can’t think of a much better to way to bide your time before returning to London.
FLEE THE COUNTRY Matt Lever, Features Ed
tor.
http://thelexicinema.co.uk Shortwave cinema:
Another intimate cinema— seating around 50 or so—you can catch everything from art house shows you thought you missed out on months ago, to new releases, to student and feminist film festivals. It’s worth it to make it out there early to explore the Bermondsey Square market just outside its doors, and enjoy a drink in the bar before your show. http:// www.shortwavefilms.co.uk/ The Electric Cinema and the Aubin Cinema: Another one in Notting Hill, the Electric Cinema is seriously an experience. With huge, plush leather seats, footstools, and even the option for a (significantly more expensive) 2-person sofa (date night anyone?) you’ll feel just as comfortable as if you were in your own living room. East Londoners can also enjoy the luxury cinema experience at the Aubin Cinema in Shoreditch, the Electric’s sister-cinema, as they call it. However, as it is much smaller, seating about 45, make sure to book ahead of time. http:// w w w. e l e c t r i c c i n e m a . c o . u k / http://www.aubincinema.com/ The Phoenix Cinema: Mark Kermode has called this his favorite cinema in the country. And indeed the Phoenix, in East Finchley, offers an extremely diverse array of films in a beautiful space. You can even take film studies classes there on Thursdays—what a way to make use of your summer! Films, films, and more films! http:// www.phoenixcinema.co.uk/
No matter what you end up doing, have a wonderful summer, fingers crossed the sun shines!
In my mind, there is only thing everyone should be doing around mid-July this year, and it’s simple. Leave. Get out of London, and preferably head abroad. Just go. It doesn’t especially matter where, either. That said, London is not going to be the only place left in the wake of ensuing devastation: unable to contain the millions upon millions of extra visitors, the capital is likely to buckle under pressure and give way to out-of-town destinations like Oxford, Cambridge and Brighton, which will be similarly affected. Sites of interest and heritage
around the country are going to be inundated with swathes of tourists quickly bored of Stratford’s running and jumping show; national public transport is going to make a half-hearted attempt to cope and then give up the ghost; patriotic spirits and general positive outlook will be at an all-time low. You might be alright with Scotland or maybe Wales, but why compromise when you could take this opportunity to go somewhere nice? This mostly likely means flying, though, and you’ll need to get to
As for myself, I’m heading to Nepal in July. The south apparently reaches dizzying heights of 40°C temperatures but I’m going to stick to Katmandu and the northern glacial lakes at the foothills of the Himalayas. Apparently it has some of the first bungee jumping sites in the world, and some of the best white water rafting. I’m never been one of those adrenalin junkie adventure holiday types, but it sounds like bliss in comparison to what London’s going to be like. Ultimately though, you could go anywhere and do anything. I’m sure that, just this once, the characteristic English cynicism towards the Olympics is entirely justified. Get out whilst you can.
My top tip for escaping the Olympics frenzy short of actually leaving London? Grab a book and head towards your favourite reading spot. I asked a few of the editors what they will be reading this Summer and their recommendations for both literal and inner peace and quiet. Coryn Brisbane – I’ll be taking Caitlin Moran’s How to be a Woman a hilarious insight into feminism by the Times columnist, to the Southbank. Although it is sure to be full of crowds, I love to people-watch in-between chapters and if you get bored/ the weather decides to play up you can always head to the numerous galleries within walking distance. At night it is particularly beautiful, read 100 pages under the fairy lights then grab your mates and go to Giraffe or Las Iguanas for amazing cocktails. Steph Fairburn – This Summer I’ll be reading A Street Cat Named Bob, a heart-warming true story about a homeless guy’s adventures with a cat he finds injured on the streets of London, in my favourite park, Greenwich Park. Surrounded by cafes and ice-cream parlours you can also walk to the London Viewing Point if the thought of all those athletes makes you suddenly feel guilty about that last scoop of gelato. Charlotte Richardson – As Sports Editor I don’t want to be too far away from the
SUMMER READS Theodora Wakeley, Arts Ed Olympic action so I will go to a Wetherspoons, read rugby player Lewis Moody’s recent autobiography, My Life in Rugby over breakfast then join in with the widescreen revelries with a pint of cider. This is a once-in-a-lifetime experience so why would I miss any of it? Theodora Wakeley – I have two recommendations. Firstly nothing beats reading and sunbathing on Hampstead Heath. Pack some Pimms, hummus and olives then, once you’ve devoured both words and said middle-class snacks, stroll towards Hampstead village to the famous creperie
for dessert. If you are lucky you may spot fellow Heathresidents and fantastically eccentric couple Tim Burton and Helena Bonham Carter (not a pipe dream, a friend has twice). If you’re over the Heath but still in North London, go to Alexandra Palace. The hike up from Wood Green is pretty intense but once there you will be rewarded with a deer park and stunning views of London. And my reading list? Irvine Welsh’s latest Skagboys, a prequel to Trainspotting, and Richard Ford’s wildly anticipated and epicly titled Canada.
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Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Staying in London over the summer? Dreading the Olympic invasion? Here some of our editors give their advice on where to go, what to do, and when to do it so that you can beat the crowds and (hopefully) maintain your sanity over the Olympic period. The Olympic Stadium: looks inviting...
MUSICAL INTERLUDE Shivan Davis, Music Ed Now for some some musical alternatives for those of us who’d rather miss the once in a lifetime experience : “TEAM GB. Yes. Winning.” If you don’t care for this kind of spiel then the City of London will not be a pleasant place from 27th July to whenever the Olympics finish. The lead up to the Olympics has been tedious enough thanks to the ticket debacle and the age-old argument about which sports should and should not be classed as Olympic Sports. I’ve been lobbying for lion taming to be introduced for years but my outrage has fallen upon deaf ears. I’m sure the Japanese are equally upset about whaling’s unpopularity amongst the Olympic committee. I’m quite ambivalent about The Olympics. I find most of the events, outside of their Olympian setting, rather dull, and would only participate in the vast majority of them if I had a large financial incentive or if in some bizarre dystopian future I have to jump hurdles to feed my family. People who spend time training for these sort of sports (and I have friends that do) I simply can’t relate to. Why would you choose to spend your time wearing tight fitting lycra on a boat, on a dirty river, in the freezing cold, going at an agonizingly slow pace? Why would I choose to run, in a huge circle, only to end up where I started and covered in sweat? We all think that a man throwing a metallic Frisbee without anyone returning it is a truly sad sight. And surely, it’s a bit sadistic to want to watch these people struggle? So, it seems only natural for me and others like myself to find some cavern where we can retreat to come summer. Unfortunately, caverns tend to be quite
miserable so I’ve instead decided to find cavern-like places where they’ll be music to drown out the cheers of the crowds. This is the best I can offer, apologies for any that involve being outside: 1. Hillbilly Moon Explosion, 9th August @ The Jazz Cafe: 50’s rock music night. Exactly what you’d expect in a night of true homage to old American rock n roll - get your bobby socks on. 2. WOMAD @ Charlton Park: Get away for the weekend, when the Olympic frenzy will be at its peak. Personally, I’d much rather watch the best musicians from around the world rather than the men/women who can jump the farthest into a sandpit. 3. Latitude Festival @ Henham Park, Suffolk: Although it falls just outside of the Olympics- you’ll make it home in time for the Opening Ceremony, the line-up justifies the price tag. Bats for Lashes, Bon Iver, Paul Weller, etc promise to boost this festival’s profile even higher. 4. Paul Simon @ Hyde Park Calling: The legendary singersongwriter will be performing Graceland, in its entirety, in celebration of the album’s 25 year anniversary. Sure beats the walking (how is that an Olympic sport when taserball isn’t?). However, this is two weeks before the Olympics begins... 5. George Benson @ The Royal Albert Hall: Another musical legend plays at the famous venue on the 28th July. And that’s pretty much it of the big names, but there are tonnes of smaller things going on, I hope. Otherwise, book a holiday.
. You can also go and see King’s own play there and support your peers. Alternatively, or as an extension to your trip, visit the exquisitely stunning Scottish Highlands. You can do the tourist tracks and go to Loch Ness and try spot the monster, we all know it exists, or you can go off the beaten track and lose yourself in the lochs and moors. There are great tours and trips which give you an extensive guide of the highlands or alternatively you can stay in one of the grand estates and manors, sit in one of the imposing libraries at a dark green leather sofa and drink some Scottish whiskey telling ghost stories round a fire.
STAYCATE Coryn Brisbane, Fashion & Lifestyle Ed
Whilst some editors aren’t backing their glorious country as a viable option for your summer (cough-cough Matt), I am taking it upon myself to show you that there is more to Britain than the Olympics. The incessant ramble of ‘the Olympics are dominating this country – ESCAPE BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE’ is getting a bit repetitive don’t you think? That isn’t to say I myself am not going on a summer holiday (… or three), but I am also holidaying it up Britain-style and I am inviting you all to do the same and explore and adventure these fair isles. As London is experiencing the hustle and bustle of endless tourists why not get back to nature and truly escape. It sounds like I’m endorsing a hippieyoga refuge but instead I am
talking about camping pods. Located in the Cornish coast, the small pods come equipped with electricity and water and are situated in the heart of the beautiful scenery. Starting from £35 a night, for those of you who love ‘glamping’, this is perfect. www.tregardoc.com/pods.asp Alternatively you can head to the other end of the country and go to Edinburgh. Although the Camden Fringe is in one of the most vibrant parts of London and hosts some great acts, the renowned Edinburgh Fringe Festival gives you the chance to escape the busy city and try the feasts of Scotland. It will be bustling with people and accommodation and tickets are particularly expensive that week but the atmosphere and comedy are second to none
If nightlife is more your thing, although London is a hub of fantastic clubs and bars, why not explore what other cities have to offer. Take inspiration from TOWIE and visit the Sugar Hut or Geordie Shore and party at Tup Tup Palace. Either way make sure you’ve San Moritz-ed, extension-ed, acrylic-ed your nails and got the tightest dress and highest heels you can find on. If the shows are anything to go by, your immaculate image will fade increasingly throughout the night as you end falling over in the street, picking up your fallen kebab and then eating it. I guess nothing changes much wherever you are in the country at 4am. If a glam, drunk night isn’t really your scene head up to Manchester or down to Brighton for a long weekend. The cities are buzzing during the day and both have incredible vintage fashion offerings. At night there will be more night for those who enjoy an indie disco to a dub-step rave.
14 Fashion & Life Style
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Edited by Coryn Brisbane fashion@roarnews.co.uk
Chelsea Chic
By Lauren Clark ‘Chelsea chic’ has replaced ‘boy chic’ and ‘festival chic’ as the new aspirational style of choice. It has gripped us the most common fashion via semi-reality television series, Made in Chelsea. Ever since Diana propelled the ‘Sloane’ into mainstream consciousness in the ‘80s, there has been a certain distinctive style emanating from the borough of Kensington and pounding the King’s Road pavements. Call it the ‘Kate Middy’ effect, or the fact that Made in Chelsea has become a wonderfully cringe-worthy Monday night hit, but females everywhere are after the put-together look of Millie, Caggie, Rosie et al. The stars are themselves cashing in on their much revered Chelsea style, and pursuing the fashion industry to much success. Here is their style lowdown.
Binky Felstead This girl’s style is laid-back Chelsea. Binky’s screen appearances consist of slouchy separates, playsuits and block colours.
Caggie Dunlop She may have just unpatriotically exited the nation’s favourite show, but Caggie has one of the most British of all the cast’s wardrobes. Her penchant for pale wash and frayed denim is very ‘English festival’, but she keeps it glamorous by dressing it up with clean lines and ‘done’ blond locks. Caggie loves white, and wore it in the first series Bianca-Jagger-style in a trouser suit. Her look is best described as classic with a dash of quirky. Statement fur coats, leopard print or long and fur-lined, Fair Isle knits and lots of camel garments. While fairly classic and androgynous, she is more adventurous than many of her fellow Chelsea girls – remember that orange Cannes dress? Although an aspiring singer-songwriter, Caggie has established a fashion brand, ISWAI, an appropriately edgy reflection of her own ‘grunge glamour’.
Millie Macintosh Millie has stuck almost religiously to the Chelsea Code of Style. Classic tote? Check. St Tropez tan? Check. Neutral palette? Check. Blow-dried mane? Check. Millie keeps it classic SW3, although demure is not really her style, preferring plunging, sheer fabrics and short hems for both day and night. Her look is particularly feminine compared to the other Chelsea girls, with a wardrobe consisting predominantly of dresses, blouses and girly prints. Mille loves fur, whether a gilet in Paris or a scarf and hat in snowy London. Her off-duty is a jacket that pulls her outfit together, from the safely Chelsea tweed to the more adventurous coral print leather that she wore in a recent episode. Keeping her look on-trend, she has been sporting some pastel and leopard print skinny jeans of late – with heels to up the taxi-calling, glamour stakes. Already a make-up artist and good friends with beauty blogger Tanya Burr, Millie has stretched out into the fashion sphere, with modelling contracts for Lipsy, Manuka Doctor and Umberto Giannini, and interning at the fashion magazine Glamour.
The show’s English Rose, if by appearance more than character, Rosie diverts more towards the current trends than the classic Chelsea style, though her immaculate hair and make-up and dedication to heels ensure her origins are always betrayed. She is a fan of androgynous tailoring, sharp cuts and with an almost gothic liking for leather and dark red lipstick, giving her a very ‘tough’ appearance. Skinny jeans, shirt and jacket, with an expensive-looking bag, are her staples, while her inner fashionista cries out with wide brim floppy hats and Great Gatsby-style evening wear. A twin sister working for fashion brand Austique, and her own style blog, Rosie looks set to become a big force in fashion if her positive interview from Glamour was anything to go by.
Rosie Fortescue
Oliver Proudlock And a final mention to this blonde ‘boy’ (anyone else notice how they’re pushing this phrase through?). Chiselled jaw, luscious blonde locks, hipster-come-chelsea art student style and an earring whicn we really should hate but it’s kind of growing on us. Proudlock is definitely representing the Chelsea boys well. Proudlock’s fashion venture, Serge DeNimes, is fresh, original and surreal and with his tees selling in Harrods and Joseph, along with an incredible website, this ‘boy’ is revitalising Chelsea fashion.
Louise Thompson Louise has the polished Chelsea style down to a T. With her sixties eye flicks, red lipstick and that fur hat when she met Jamie at the train station, she is pure put-together stylish class. However, Louise also does dressed down rather well in slouchy knits and quilted Barbour jackets, and references hippy-chic with wide-leg pink silky trousers and long ethereal dresses for evening
www.sergedenimes.com
Right or wrong, we do judge others by what they’re wearing.
wealth or occupation, a woman’s haircut indicated her marital status and so on. In a sense, you were ‘supposed’ to be judged or assessed by your outfit. Today, the way we dress places us in different clusters of society. In the UK, ‘chavs’ and ‘neds’ are often identified by their fondness for tracksuits and fake Burberry caps and they are also associated with specific behaviour and activities. People in Mayfair and Chelsea have distinctly different fashion tendencies from people in Camden. My own city, Stockholm, has three well-defined style orientations, depending on where you are from or where you hang out – and the people don’t mix. The way we dress has the potential to link us to a group and experience that feeling of community and belonging. Consequently our ‘look’, associated with a particular group, forms the basis of a general judgement about who we are (think Essex, Goths, hipsters…)
It is not a modern phenomenon; in Ancient times what you wore was a direct reference to your
Clothes are a way for us to express ourselves, they tell a story: where we’re from, what we
Judging a Book by its Cover Eva Chaideftos ‘Pride and Prejudice’ was going to be called ‘First Impressions’ and if that story isn’t enough to make you realise that our initial perceptions of character are wrong then nothing will. Eva Chaideftos looks at how we now tend to judge people irrevocably before they’ve even opened their mouth and how it’s time to change such an attitude.
do, our musical preferences, political inclinations... in reality what we wear may be an attempt to pro- voke a particular reaction or make a unique first impression. Undeniably, it can serve a purpose; a job interview for example is a situation where first impressions are often the deciding factor and you have the power to twist this impression any way you like. We do it because we love talking about other people. In our time, we are constantly linked-in, informed and updated – I know what you wore last weekend, yesterday, the day before that and what you plan to wear to that wedding in September. And I crave this knowledge, I discuss it at lunch, I assess it, analyse it, admire it and question it. But I will withhold some judging and allow myself to change my opinion of you if my expectations or beliefs are proved wrong. If they are proved right though, I will feel shrewd...
Fashion & Life Style
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Kick Back
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Perfect Summer Battenburg Cake
Kristina Freeman
Sports Editor Charlotte Richardson proves that trainers are more than just sporting gear and should be top of your shopping list this summer.
TRENDING The Voice. Saturday nights are back with a bang. Here in the Roar! office we cannot wait until the weekend to get our fix. We are team Tom!
Trainers, kicks, crepes, sneakers, whatever you want to call them, this is the summer to ditch the flip-flops and rock some decent footwear. Comfortable, classy and cool, take a look at this selection of trainers to indulge in during a summer of sport… Admittedly, black wouldn’t be the first colour choice for a new pair of shoes this summer, but the glam gems on this pair defo can be pulled off and given how unreliable our British summers always are, could be worth their value in reliability. I must admit I dipped into my student loan a couple of weeks ago to snap up this pair and during the ‘drought’ over the last few weeks and haven’t gone a day without wearing them. (Adidas: £76.99 - below, left)
Brangelina’s wedding. Secretly we are hoping Jen will come back in the picture but until then we wait in anticipation for the photos! SUMMER! Justin Bieber’s Radio 1 interview, He doesn’t seem to realise everyone just takes the piss. Entertainment gold.
Vans are always a good choice because they can be chucked on in a rush or customised specifically for an outfit and look equally good. For the boys, I would recommend this style as the extra detail adds a touch of class when worn with coloured chinos. (Vans, £52.00, avaliable at Office - above, right) Girls, make a bit of a statement with your choice of Vans. These are fresh but also rather special, as the first shoe to feature the Off The Wall logo. They still retain an authentic feel with a padded collar and the Vans classic waffle sole. (Vans, £49.99. avaliable at Office - below, left)
Ken Livingstone. Even though he lost the Majoral election he’s dedicating his time to gardening.
The Jubilee memorabilia. Tulisa. We can forgive the sex-tape but not FHM’s decision to put her as Sexiest Woman above Rosie H-Whiteley.
In the build up to the Olympics these high dunks will bring some gold glamour to your world-class wardrobe. A bold choice, but hey how many times do we have the Olympics in our city? (Nike, approx. £85.00 - above, right) Festival comfort is equally important for the fellas as it is for females. A pair of Jordans will look slick but subtle in whatever weather during any performance. So if you’re hitting Wireless, Bestival, Reading or anywhere else be sure to look good and have a good time in a pair of these. (Nike - below, left)
Simon Cowell. The empire is nearing its end. FINALLY. Whether this should be trending of trailing has divided the Roar! office. After a debate KKKW are officialy trailing. Another contentious one in the office this week. The new London buses. Bring back the old routemasters. The ReynoldsLively relationship. Buying a $1,800,000 property in N.Y - a messy divorce waiting to happen and we cannot wait for it as it means both are back on the market!
TRAILING
Kristina Freeman is back one last time to tempt us into indulgence before the summer diet kicks is supposed to kick in. The Battenberg cake is perfect for a summer of British celebration! So why not dress it up a bit? In this recipe I have swapped the traditional marzipan for fondant icing for a more decorative finish. However, either looks and tastes delightful. For the cake: For the filling: Decoration: 4oz/100g caster sugar 3oz/100g softened 9oz/225g icing sugar 4oz/100g margarine butter 1 egg white 4oz/100g self-raising 6oz/150g icing sugar Food colouring, if flour 1tsp vanilla extract desired 2 eggs (beaten) 4tbs raspberry/straw12oz/ 300g white fon1 tsp vanilla extract berry jam dant icing 2-3 tsp pink food Decorations of your colouring choice 1. Preheat the oven to 180°C/350°F/Gas Mark 4. Grease an 8x6 inch rectangular cake tin. 2. Line the cake tin with greaseproof paper. Make a crease of about 3-4 inches in a separate sheet of greaseproof paper, so when the paper is positioned in the tin the crease would cut down the middle of the tin widthways. Position the creased greaseproof paper in the tin, ensuring the crease is directly in the middle of the tin (use a ruler if you like!) 3. Cream the margarine, caster sugar and vanilla extract together in a mixing bowl until pale and fluffy. 4. Add a third of the beaten eggs and sieve a third of the flour into the butter mixture and mix thoroughly. Repeat until all the flour and eggs have been used up. Divide the mixture into two separate bowls evenly. Tint one half of the mixture with the pink food colouring. 5. Spoon the cake mixture into the prepared tin, plain on one side of the dividing crease, and pink on the other. Bake in the oven for 20-25 minutes until springy to the touch or until a knife comes out clean. Allow to cool for a while in the tin before taking it out and allowing it to cool completely on a cooling rack. 6. Once cooled, trim the rough edges of the cakes ensuring both are equal in size, and place them on top of each other; cut through both of the cakes vertically to create 4 even pieces. Arrange the pieces of cake so that the same colours are diagonal to each other. Once you know how you want your cake to be arranged, disassemble the pieces for the filling to be applied. 7. For the filling: sieve the icing sugar into a bowl, add the softened butter and the vanilla extract. Cream everything together until pale and spreadable. Use half the butter cream and half of the jam as the filling: take the bottom two cakes and sandwich them together with jam and buttercream. Repeat with the top two cakes, and then stick the top and bottom layer together in the same way.
Taking Back Sundaes Studs are the summer statement. Soften the trend with this pastel pair of Kurt Geiger plimsols. The silver studs make a cool, contemporary addition to any off–duty look. (KG by Kurt Geiger, £95 - Above, right) Editor’s Pick: I see myself as more of a heeled studded boot or slipper shoe kind of girl. I’m not trainer adverse, per se, but I definitely do not drift sub-consciously to the trainer section of a shoe store. Saying that, I have been known to love the occasional trainer and here are two of my favourites. I absolutely love vintage Nike 6.0s (subject to price and avaliability on Ebay - below, right). It takes a while to find the perfect pair on Ebay but when you do it is worth the wait. Second are the hot new things of the trainer world -nthese Ash wedge trainers (Ash, £159 - below, left). They look like a standard pair of high-tops but the secret wedge inside gives you the legs of wearing stilettos. Toned legs with comfort, what’s not to love?
Bonita Hui Gelatorino is a short walk from the Strand campus and is a sure hit on those hot summer days or even in the winter when people have a frozen treat craving. All gelato is made in-house, using only top quality ingredients from the regions of Italy and without the use of preservatives, colouring or artificial thickeners. The huge selection of gelato and sorbets can be daunting, so ask for a taste straight from the authentic Ponzetti counter before you make your final choice. A few of the flavours are just ordinary, but the lemon pie, when paired with the green apple or pear sorbet, is amazing, and the ‘Breakfast in Turin’ has the perfect velvety consistency coffee cream loaded with semisweet chocolate chips. The prices are a little steep for its portions compared to the nearby Scoop shop but it is definitely the better option, as its gelato is less heavy but still full of flavour. Tasty and addictive, Gelatorino will make you indulge in gluttony without feeling guilty at all.
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Arts
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012 “What do I ask of a painting? I ask it to astonish, disturb, seduce, convince”. Goodbye my friends; it’s been swell.
Edited by Theodora Wakeley arts@roarnews.co.uk
In Praise of Radio Suddenly, a Knock on the Door Ethan Schwartz
A bearded Swede, a Pizza delivery guy and a
pollster, with two pistols and a cleaver between them, barge into a room and demand a story. ‘I bet things like this never happen to Amos Oz or David Grossman.’ Welcome to the often funny, usually poignant and always surprising world of Etgar Keret. Keret, 45, has been described as ‘the voice of young Israel’, and he’s back from ten years of writer’s block with a new collection: Suddenly, a Knock on the Door, which rivals the very best of his twenty years of writing. It’s clear that his hiatus from the short story, which has coincided with forays into film, including Camera d’Or winner Jellyfish, and fatherhood, has affected his themes and outlook, while not diminishing the spark of original genius that flows through his stories. His early works, such as the novella, Kneller’s Happy Campers, later adapted by Goran Dukic into the cult film Wristcutters: A Love Story, often focused on young people presented with the lively absurdities of Keret’s universe. Now they’ve been replaced by grown men and women who struggle against life’s bizarre iniquities – a businessman with an insufferable haemorrhoid (or a haemorrhoid with an insufferable businessman), an angel given the toughest task of all: peace on earth, a man whose
Harriet Thompson It seems that over the years, the airwaves have become a significantly less fashionable form of entertainment, particularly amongst young people. Back in the 1960s, pirate stations were thriving and radio quickly became a creative platform for rebelling youth. So why did radio lose its cool credibility? Well, the answer is probably that those kids listening to Radio Caroline grew up to become our parents and consequently, the reactionary gene caused us to condemn radio as an outdated artform. However, the rise of digital radio has seen stations such as BBC 6Music, which has made an incredible recovery since nearly being axed in 2010, bringing radio back into the trendy public sphere. Having grown up with Radio 4 blaring out at home, I must admit that I always associated it with boring adults talking about boring things, and that terrible serial drama The Archers echoing around the kitchen, which I felt to be the epitome of dull. I never quite believed my parents when they predicted that one day I would love Radio 4, but the time has come for me to eat my uninformed, childish words. Since starting university with a digital radio device in tow, I have discovered the brilliance of stations such as 6 Music, Radio 4 and Radio 4 Extra. The radio not only filled the (admittedly small) hole in my life left by vacuous television programmes but also provided me with an audio accompaniment to pretty much every situation. BBC 6 Music became my primary method of discovering new sounds, as well as helping me get out of bed in time for 9am seminars. Radio 4 was there for moments of boredom, procrastination, loneliness and educational supplement. And now I deem it necessary to spread this love of radio and recommend it as a healthier, funnier and cleverer alternative to mind-numbing television. The true beauty of radio, I think, lies in the fact that you can do other things whilst you’re listening, so it needn’t disrupt your entire day. In fact, I usually find that it enhances it.
A recent gem on Radio 4 was a dramatisation of T.S Eliot’s ‘The Wasteland’, read by Jeremy Irons and Eileen Atkins. Broadcast as one of the station’s Afternoon Dramas, the pair of actors brought character and expression to the renowned modernist piece, emphasising the dialogic nature of the poem. The programme was introduced with a brief discussion of ‘The Wasteland’, featuring contributions from poet Jackie Kay and Dr Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury. Not only was this feature interesting and educational, it provided a useful introduction and context to the poem for those listeners who had never read it (I must, rather ashamedly, count myself in that category). As well as the afternoon drama on Radio 4, I would recommend Melvyn Bragg’s In Our Time for in-depth intellectual discussions, which often provide valuable knowledge on specific topics, and Open Book for updates on what’s popular in the world of reading. On BBC 6 Music, Sean Keaveny’s breakfast show provides a chirpy, northern-accented start to the day and Lauren Laverne (despite being a slightly annoying, trendyblonde from TV) actually plays some really good music. Radio 3 is also worth a listen - don’t be fooled by its somewhat damaging classical reputation, it also plays some great jazz and world music, along with tapping into arts and culture. The Verb is a great show, presented by poet and broadcaster Ian Macmillan, featuring a cabaret of word in the form of poetry, new writing and performances. So next time you’re watching Made in Chelsea and wondering what your life has come to, perhaps you should consider the merits of radio as an alternative entertainment. You might just be surprised. Melvyn Bragg’s In Our Time is broadcast Thursdays 9am and 9.30 pm, Radio 4. Mariella Frostrup’s Open Book is available on BBC iplayer. Ian Macmillan ‘The Verb’ is broadcast Fridays 10pm, Radio 3.
girlfriend only sleeps with men named Ari. Keret is not averse to stunts – for instance, a story that announces itself to be ‘the best story in the book’ – that some may find too self-consciously clever, yet they also display the essential playfulness at the heart of his writing, which is sometimes clouded by the darker, Kafkaesque hues assumed in his new work. Keret has been criticised by some in the older generation of Israeli writers, A.B. Yehoshua being the prime example, for not addressing explicitly political themes in his writing and for his simple linguistic style. Yet this misses the point. Keret addresses political issues, such as increasing fragmentation within Israeli society, not through explicit polemic or overwrought allegory, but through a sometimes-gentle, sometimes-visceral presentation of the world as a sort of surrealist purgatory, where things often go wrong, but frequently – if the characters are lucky – go very right. Throughout Suddenly, a Knock on the Door, Keret opens up an unflinching, deeply Israeli window onto both the great potential and great tragedy of our post-modern world. You could do a lot worse than taking a peek. Suddenly, a Knock on the Door by Etgar Keret, Chatto & Windus, £12.99.
£20 tickets for under 25s to see ‘Most Attractive Cast in the West End’
The Multi-Olivier Award winning ‘Chicago’ has won the first ever ‘Most Attractive Cast’ prize at the Mousetraps Awards.
And from now until 28th Sept, under 25s can get their hands on tickets for a mere £20 (excluding are Friday Evening and Saturday shows)/
For the past month, hundreds of young theatregoers aged between 15 and 24 have been voting for a variety of different categories such as Best Play, Best Musical, Best Ensemble etc in The Mousetraps Awards, as part of the Mousetrap Theatre Projects’ Youth Forum. Barry and Fran Weissler, the producers of London’s sexiest show, are thrilled to announce that Chicago has won the most coveted award. Filled with stunning choreography inspired by the legendary Bob Fosse this multi award-winning production has a sizzling score including All That Jazz, Cell Block Tango and Razzle Dazzle.
Chica-Go! Theodora Wakeley As Arts Editor I have quite an embarrassing confession to make: I have never been to see a West End musical. Technically, that’s a lie. I might have seen Grease when I was four on a family day-out to London but nobody can remember if I actually went or stayed shopping with my musical-detesting mother, least of all me. Either way the confession still stands - I definitely haven’t made full use of my student years in the country’s musical capital until now. I don’t really have a reason for this self-imposed embargo; some of my favourite films are musicals. I suppose it is the effort involved in getting cheap tickets (i.e. leaving the house) when I would rather just effortlessly buy some tickets online for productions at the National or Young
promo code box.
A booking fee of up to £2 per ticket applies for telephone and online bookings. Avoid booking fees by turning up at the box office: Garrick Theatre, Charing Cross Road, London WC2H 0HH Be razzled and dazzled by Chicago: a Broadway and West End classic... without breaking the bank!
You can claim your bargain tickets by calling 0844 412 4662 and quoting UTWENTY. Alternatively, you can visit https:// tickets.nimaxtheatres.com/gateway. aspx?E=N&QL=S2524|VGAK|GSho wDatesCombo.aspx Then just put UTWENTY into the Vic. Recently, however, I had been lamenting my poor experience of the West End, gazing longingly at the Time Out list, thinking, ‘I would even gladly go to We Will Rock You or Rock of Ages. I am definitely going to splurge post-dissertation’, when lo and behold two tickets to Chicago arrived in my inbox. I sat waiting for Chicago with a mix of both anticipation and expectation. The latter because I have seen Chicago the film countless times, know most of the songs, and, like a lot of women, think I am Velma Kelly if ‘All That Jazz’ comes on when I’ve had a few too many, and the former because I was about to pop my West End cherry. In short, for me it felt like meeting up with an old friend. Velma and Roxy have the same wigs, most of the numbers have the same choreography, Billy Flynn is still weirdly attractive and Amos Hart is his usual simple, but audience sympathy-inducing self.
www.chicagothemusical. co.uk Facebook chicagolondon Twitter chicagolondon Performance times Monday - Thursday 8pm Friday 5pm & 8.30pm Saturday 3pm & 8pm This is a friend, however, who has also distinctly changed for the better - to see it on stage is to witness the sheer amount of meticulous effort put into creating the same sell-out show every night. The spotlight is not just on the leads but also on the dancers, who prove incredibly versatile (and flexible), and the band, who, rather than being dismissed into an orchestra pit, take centre stage – in fact the band is a character in itself, interacting with the others and providing them (or not in some cases) with exit music. Yes, there are songs that were cut out of the film (although apart from Mary Sunshine’s I can see why – they aren’t bad, just less show-stopping) but what really makes seeing the stage show worthwhile is the added humour, the live intensity and the razzle-dazzle. Chicago is showing at the Garrick Theatre.
Arts
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
An Interview with Andrew O’Hagan
– that would be my philosophy. Writers need to know how to listen to their own experience and find a language for their sensations. People don’t always have that – or they don’t have it to a sufficiently high degree.
Sofie Kouropatov Andrew O’Hagan is the Man Booker Prize nominated author of several published works, including the critically acclaimed novels Our Fathers and Be Near Me. He is currently a Creative Writing Fellow at King’s College London.
Jacobean Jolts Zahra Mirza My intentions in booking tickets to see John Webster’s The Duchess of Malfi were purely academic; it was one of the texts on the never-ending reading list that English students are blighted with. As soon as the play started, however, I was pleasantly surprised. The simplicity of the stage set-up directed all the focus to the brilliant performances by the actors, which made for a very dramatic and thoroughly enjoyable interpretation of this tragedy. I would recommend that everyone, English student or not, go watch it. Thanks to a friend who tackled booking the tickets, we found ourselves in the first row at the Old Vic, curiously labelled ‘B’, inches away from the stage. Before we could articulate any theories on why row ‘A’ didn’t exist, the show started, exactly on time to the minute, and a host of candle-holding figures took to the stage. Despite some complaints and negative reviews, I have to commend how well the simple stage set-up was pulled off, since after watching massive shows like The Phantom of the Opera and Wicked, you expect all the bells and whistles to be pulled out for entertainment. None of that was needed, and we could instead appreciate how the gloomy atmosphere was perfectly maintained through the constant glow of the candles and how the increasing tension and conflict of the play flowed smoothly across
the makeshift three-tiered platform. The established stars on the stage definitely shined for me, featuring Eve Best (The King’s Speech, Nurse Jackie) as the doomed Duchess and Harry Lloyd (Game of Thrones, Jane Eyre) as her aggressive twin brother, Ferdinand, but Mark Bonnar was an equally dominating presence as the vengeful servant, Bosola. Just as Gary Oldman showed Joey in his appearance on Friends, all good actors spit when they say their lines, and in this case Lloyd had it in the bag. At one point I was so startled by his maddened and jealous portrayal of Ferdinand that I had to suppress a scream when he fell to his knees right before us. It was like a revival of the equally, if not more, threatening brother figure of Viserys Targaryen he portrayed in Game of Thrones.
To start off, I must ask: how are you liking King’s? It’s a really enjoyable place to be, not least because it’s bang in the centre of the most important city in the world – and I can say that without feeling guilty because I don’t come from here, I come from Scotland. But I do love being here. I always expected that I’d teach; I had a stint at Trinity College and I liked working with students and I liked the atmosphere, so it was inevitable. Do you have a philosophy when it comes to teaching creative writing? I think it’s a matter of putting student writers in touch with themselves
Have you had a particular experience that inspired you as a writer? Yes, when I was 21 I went to work for an organisation that looked after blind ex-servicemen. [Those men had survived] in some cases the First World War, some of them were 100 or more years old – and those guys had an experience of another world. It was called Europe, it was called England, but it wasn’t a Europe or England that seemed to me to still exist. But they were survivors from it and listening to them and becoming friends with them opened up my ears and my eyes. I think it was the final push I needed into becoming a writer. Listening to their voices gave me my own voice. What would you say is the key to becoming a successful writer? This is not something I say lightly – the difference between a published writer and an unpublished one, other than talent and experience and so on…Some people who want to write don’t actually write. They don’t pursue stories they way the should.
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I don’t say that in a punitive sort of voice but it seems to me the difference is that writers work extremely hard, they don’t clock on and clock off like in a normal job, they’re constantly on duty. I keep four or five projects going at once and I try to do them as well as I can. So I would say to young writers, get the spade out, start working, find stories. The world is full of under-described lives, places, hidden stories, exploitations, rights and wrongs, so get your pen out and start digging with it, as Seamus Heaney once said. Is reading more work or pleasure for you? It’s everything to me – it’s my hobby, it’s my profession, the object of my desire, my preoccupation, it’s my wife, it’s my life, it’s everything. I never get away from it, and I don’t want to get away from it. It’s an addictive substance, literature. And I’m too far-gone now. I sort of depend on it to make sense of things and to accompany me. Wallace Stevens once said, “literature helps us to live our lives” and I’ve always subscribed to that. I think it does, or at least it makes things nicer. Go for
to the
full
roarnews.co.uk interview.
smART students
Although there were the occasional giggles (embarrassingly on our part) at almost every death scene (and there are a lot, elongated and performed with as much seriousness as possible, almost disregarding the obvious overflow of fake blood) I think the extremely talented cast compensated for these instances by successfully capturing the essence of the original tragedy.
The Duchess of Malfi is showing at the Old Vic until 9 June 2012. Tickets from £20.
Christobel Hastings-Knowles As I sat toiling through Medieval Literature coursework essays the other day, characteristically late, I was feeling rather dejected. But then I remembered the thousands of school children who are gearing up to take GCSE’s and A-level examinations and I realised, I was actually quite lucky to be studying what I wanted and working in the style that suits me. It’s more than British schoolchildren are permitted. It’s the time of year when schoolchildren, and in particular, college students stress about impending examinations. Phrases such as “your whole life depends on these grades” are casually tossed into conversation amidst the angst and nerves permeating revision classes. I remember how miserable I felt sitting many of my GCSE’s; that were assessing my aptitude for a narrow minded subject when my
creativity capacities were totally neglected. Why is it that if you’re not proficient at Maths then you are automatically stupid? I skived most of school to work at home because I felt it was more productive. I feel that too many students are afraid to embrace independent thought and define their own individuality for fear of being persecuted. Furthermore, I think the schooling system actively suppresses individuality and creativity. This is a view that has been championed with conviction by the likes of Sir Ken Robinson, renowned educationalist and speaker for TED Conferences. Robinson’s speech condemned the tunnel vision education system and advocated a revolution aimed at nurturing the full spectrum of children’s innate creativity. Robinson stated: “Every education system on Earth has the same hierarchy of subjects: at the top are mathematics and
languages, then the humanities, and the bottom are the arts. Creativity now is as important in education as literacy, and we should treat it with the same status. I believe this passionately: that we don’t grow into creativity, we grow out of it. Or rather, we get educated out if it.” I feel that after so many years of studying subjects that were useless to me, and being told that the arts were bottom priority, that what Robinson asserts is painfully accurate. I am fortunate that I now have the opportunity to study what I want and have that interest supported. Furthermore I work in patterns that suit me without anyone telling me it’s wrong. Order has flown away like those flighty teenage years and I don’t feel my identity or ambition to succeed is inhibited anymore. But there are people who will never be allowed to discover their true creative talents.
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Music Music
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012 School might be nearly out for summer... But Roar! carrys on all the way through the warmest months. Send us your album, gig and festival reviews, or other musically inclined musings for www.roarnews.co.uk The best articles might make it into the first issue of next year too!
Summer Love with Sea Of Bees
KYLA La GRANGE & WE WERE EVERGREEN
Harriet Thompson Gallery Cafe, E2 - Tuesday 8th May Every summer I seem to stumble across a musical artist or album that captures my seasonal mood and ends up acting as a soundtrack to my memories. My latest musical obsession, Sea Of Bees, has seen me bleeding two excellent albums dry with constant repetitious listening. The fact that Jules Baenziger’s band happened to be playing two gigs in London within a few weeks of one another was a temptation that I couldn’t resist, so I treated myself with a ticket to both.
Johnny Tipler Norwich Waterfront has two faces: the main auditorium, (which is putting it kindly), is like an underground car park, a sweaty moshpit when a good-time two-tone band like The Beat struts its ska rhyddyms. Then there’s upstairs, which is more like a genteel village hall. And that’s where I caught Kyla la Grange on her recent tour. My ears had pricked up listening to her spot on Jo Wiley’s Radio 2 show whilst driving home from Germany, and, car hi-fi fluctuating, I’d thought I was listening to a rocky Kate Bush. Worth a pop down the Waterfront anyway, and Kyla and her hot five piece really did the business, catchy indy-rock ditties, fast and slow, delivered with a minimum of fuss and endearing audience interaction. In truth she’d have been better off in the hardcore downstairs stage - if only the gig had been better publicised: she performed to a bunch of open mouthed schoolgirls who occupied the dancefloor like it was Sunday afternoon at Latitude fezzy, plus a few desultory oldsters and letchers for good measure. Not normal for Norwich! Support threesome We Were Evergreen were fantastic, innovative and energetic, and both bands deserved more of a reaction. Afterwards we chatted with Kyla and she wasn’t in the slightest fazed by the low turnout; it was only the second gig on the tour. Check out her amazing Vampire Smile, and We Were Evergreen’s Vintage Car (there’s a free download on their website). Kyla’s on a national tour just now, while Evergreens are over in Holland and France as well. See ’em while they’re fresh!
Roar Playlist: 1.John Legend - Ordinary People 2. Jessie J - Mumma Knows Best 3. Funk Inc.- We are Young 4. Beastie Boys - Gotta Fight For Your Right To party 5. Rizzle Kicks - Mama Do The Hump 6.Tom Jones - Delilah 7. Gotye Featuring Kimbra Somebody That I Used To Know 8. Kelly Clarkson - Stronger 9. John Mayer - Waitng For The World To change 10. Marina and the Diamonds Primadonna
Sea of Bees’ debut album Song For The Ravens was released in 2010 and I must admit that despite having been recommended it a while ago, I only recently gave this music the attention it deserves. Jules’s voice is distinctive; high but strong, fragile but strangely dark and it was with intrigued excitement that I first saw her play live. It is no exaggeration to reveal that I was blown away by the rare experience of hearing a musician who sounds even better live than they do recorded. Drawing comparisons with Joanna Newsom and Cat Power is no mean feat, but Jules’s unique appeal lies in her mesmerising stage presence and skill at storytelling. She soars through her sets, capturing the audience in her childlike gaze, with her face pressed close to the microphone and her voice floating beautifully over the rest of the band. After lengthy cheering, Jules’s encore song ‘The Woods’ saw her returning to the stage alone with her guitar. As she drew the show to an emotionally charged climax with the hauntingly pure lyric ‘Maybe I could die, happy as a bird’, Jules resembled a happy songbird gliding high above our heads.
All The King’s Men win Voice Fest UK - and are 3rd in the World! All the King’s Men have won overall university champions for the Voice Festival UK 2012 against really tough competition. Having got through to the final in the London regional heats, the team went on to win outstanding musicality against Voice Versa for ‘True Colours’ and The Oxford Gargoyles with their performance of Hallelujah. Add in Henry Southern win for outstanding choreography and All the King’s Men took home the title. The festival exists to raise awareness and popularity of a cappella art and to support the development of the existing UK a cappella scene. Winning the festival could open some great doors for the group, previous winners have been invited to perform in the Lincoln Center in New York, as well as supporting some of the world’s most famous a cappella groups, such as ‘The Swingle Singers’ and ‘The Real Group’. Indeed, following the UK round, the Men went to America to compete in the World Acapella championship, coming third overall. Who knows what’s in store next!
What’s On at KCLSU? Roar’s picks...
Live nation presents: LAWSON + Special Guests, 30 May 2012, £11.70 Graduation Ball, 1 June 2012 - buy tickets at kclsutickets.com
Music
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
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Massive congratulations to Will Davenport, who has won tickets to Beach Break live thanks to Roar! and Studentbeans.com! Have a good time, and send us some pics of you having fun!
The Best European Festivals Festivalling. It’s kind of the ‘done’ thing. and while we could easily run off a list of the best ones to go to in the UK we all know what they are. But this year, with glasto and big chill taking a break it seems like a good time to cast the net Europe wards. They are cheaper, sunnier and slacker on whether or not they will let you take booze into the arena. So here is Roar!’s difinative list of summer music funtimes. Boom - Portugal
Exit - Serbia
Pukkelpop - Belgium.
Psychodelic trance by a lake. Amazing.
GunsNRoses headlining, gotta be worth a look.
If you went last year you get free food and drink vouchers.
Rock Am Ring and Rock Im Park - Germany
Open’er - Poland
Hideout- Croatia
Festival Internacional de Benicassim- Spain
Pinkpop - Netherlands.
Not strictly on the european continent... but whatever. Rockness - Scotland
Hard core Rock N Roll fest celebrating its 25th aniversary. Gonna be messy.
Bombay Bicycle Club and paella, see you there.
Bjork, Franz Ferdinand, Bloc Party, Public Enemy, Janelle Monae, Bon Iver, Friendly Fires, Bat for Lashes, Justice and The XX. Christ.
On of the oldest music festivals with just 60’000 people. Ska legends The Specials and Seasick Steve are turning up.
Meant to be like Thailand’s Full Moon Party only with extra boat parties and you dont have to get on a long haul flight.
The prospect of maybe seeing the monster are enough to drag us north of the border. Ed Sheeran and Noah and the Whale help.
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Film
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Edited by Beth Cohon film@roarnews.co.uk
Joss Whedon Double Feature: Review of The Cabin in the Woods and Avengers Assemble Beth Cohon
the most erudite of slasher-philes.
You’d be hard-pressed to find me sitting through two hours of any sort of horror movie, especially without covering my face with my coat, blanket, or any other handy object over which I can occasionally peek between noises of screams and the inevitable squelching of some body part being hacked off by an undead ghoul. I’d call myself sensitive, but to not put it so gently, I’m a wuss.
The film takes place in --you guessed it--a desolate cabin, where five college-students plan to partake in all the usual disreputable forms of enjoyment as are common in teen horror flicks. However, something is strange about this cabin; one of the rooms has a one-way mirror which looks into another, and in the basement are a series of oddities, among them an old wedding dress, a ballerina music box and the diary of a young, Civil-War era girl whose father seems to have tortured her. The usual.
And yet how could I resist The Cabin in the Woods, the latest feature co-written by Joss Whedon, whose previous writing credits include cult classics such as Firefly, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Dr. Horrible’s SingAlong-Blog and Dollhouse, not to mention Avengers Assemble, which he wrote and directed, and which just so happens to be out now as well. Of course, I had to see for myself if the two Whedon films in one week was a gift too good to be true. So, my inner science-fiction fanaticism and love of Whedon trumped my fear of horror and, luckily for me, The Cabin in the Woods did not disappoint. In fact, it was the most fun I’ve had in the cinema in a long while. While many films are lauded (or trashed) for their twist endings (I’m looking at you, M. Night Shyamalan), the whole of The Cabin in the Woods is one big, twisted slasher-pic. Self-aware of the conventions of the genre at every step, The Cabin in the Woods will continue to surprise even
And yet, this is only half the film. Whedon and his co-writer and director Drew Goddard, whose credits include the script for several episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Alias, Lost, and his first directorial feature, Cloverfield, are pros at suspense and horror. But they are also pros at switching up the horror with intelligent humor and of course, a big dose of science fiction. Avengers Assemble unfortunately had no equally clever script. Even as the long-awaited first film to finally unite Thor, Captain America, Iron Man and the Incredible Hulk, it is entirely forgettable. You will see fantastic special effects (Manhattan being ripped to shreds by an alien army, for one) and lots of major stars, but no coherency and no heart. These hodgepodge of characters is of course meant to look a little funny together, but with
so many superheroes competing for our attention (we can’t forget to add Black Widow and Hawkeye to the list), it’s difficult get to know any of them quite well enough. Then again, that’s what the previous Thor, Iron Man, Hulk and Captain America movies were for. Yet because of this, Avengers Assemble comes across as a gimmicky action flick that was never taken seriously enough to be granted an engaging script. Up against the somewhat meek supervillain, Loki, whose questionably ‘diabolic’ and hardly thought-out plan is to rule the earth, even though he seems to hate the earth, the world never even seems vaguely threatened. Yes, New York is smashed to pieces, but with that six-picture deal which Mark Ruffalo just signed on to continue as the Hulk, I doubted he or any other Avengers were in real danger. Sadly, it’s that sense of danger--real, hopeless and all-consuming--which makes superhero films work. Every good superhero had a major weakness with which we ‘mere mortals’ can associate and empathize, and it’s why we cheer them on. Unfortunately, the only weakness in Avengers Assemble was the script itself. And for that, Whedon may have played it too safe. Yet, his script for The Cabin in the Woods as a polar opposite more than makes up for the disappointment.
Summer Special: Cinemas of London Now that the KCL Mediateque season is over, you may be wondering where you can watch some great (sometimes cheap!) film programmes away from the maddening summer crowds. No need to fear! Check out our centerfold to read about these gems of cinemas in London and other great alternatives to the Olympics.
The Coronet
The Phoenix Cinema
Shortwave Cinema
The Lexi
The Electric Cinema
Film
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
21
Sub Editor Maurice Loach
Film for a Fiver: Moon Maurice Loach
Maya Korn
Moon (Duncan Jones, 2009) may
and enraging Sam with smiley faces.
impossible to see coming. Overall,
have been directed by a man former-
Moon’s pared down style was refresh-
Moon is worth far more than a fiver
ly known as Zowie ‘son of David’
ing in 2009 and is perhaps even more
(even thought it’s is available at this
Bowie but his sci-fi feature film debut
so now, its special effects appearing
time for three quid on the HMV web-
is far from his father’s over-the-top
to have as much in common with So-
site) and is an incredibly subtle mash-
public image. Moon is perhaps most
laris as The Avengers. But this gives
up of the classics of science-fiction
obviously a film for lovers of sci-fi,
Moon a realness and tension few sci-
and an unsettling experience all on
as it riffs on the plots of the classics in
fi films such as Solaris or Alien could
its own.
fresh packaging. However, those who
ever achieve because of their focus
loathe sci-fi will also find pleasure in
on design and realism over spectacle.
Moon’s characters and the tense op-
Sam Rockwell gives an astonish-
pressive tone Jones conjures with his
ing performance in his largely solo
cinematography, giving Moon’s mun-
role, appearing in almost every frame
dane-sounding plot of a lone worker
of the film and looking impossibly
on a lunar base with a robot for com-
lonely against Jones’ desolate land-
pany (brilliantly voiced by Kevin
scape. Moon does contain the kicks
Spacey) a sharp edge. Spacey’s work
and thrills you want from the genre,
is deeply sinister, and his GERTY
but these are perhaps the film’s most
is a HAL 9000 for the MSN/Face-
tired elements, reliant on genre con-
book generation, wittily appeasing
ventions and a contrivance that isn’t
The Cult of Bad Cinema
Beginning its nine year run (and going strong) as a midnight screening at the Sunset 5 in Los Angeles, The Room was hailed as so “hopelessly amateurish” that the audience used to repeatedly walk out during its two-week opening in 2003. Yet by 2006, it was outselling any other midnight shows at this space by five or six times. To this day, there are monthly screenings of The Room at the Prince Charles cinema in Leicester Square. What is it about the bad that can be (perhaps, guiltily) ever so good? The cult of bad cinema has been a phenomenon since the Grindhouse and B movie films of the 1960s and 1970s. These films were famous for their themes of violence and sexual deviance and were shown at clandestinely late hours. Called the “Citizen Kane of bad movies” The Room--written, directed by, and starring Tommy Wiseau--is an astonishing example of ‘bad cinema’-turned-cultclassic. The phenomenon of the spectator’s love of bad cinema is a strange one. The Room does not have a cohesive plot: on a basic level it is a love triangle between Johnny (Tommy Wiseau), his fiancée Lisa (Juliet Danielle) and his best friend Mark (Greg Sestero) but the gratuitous sex scenes, supporting cast of purposeless characters (Lisa’s mother announces she has cancer and then it is never spoken of again) leave one nearly entirely confused about what they are viewing. There are also several rumours about Wiseau’s background, creating a sort of mystique and pseudo star-quality which is essential, given the film has no actual stars to attract spectators. He is rumoured to have put $6 million dollars into the film, which he may or may not have gotten from being a Romanian arms dealer, but he will not talk about his early life prior to The Room. But there is no denying he respects his fans and accepts their backhanded tributes with an equanimity that might have eluded a more thin-skinned auteur. It’s hard to picture Ingmar Bergman showing up to screenings of The Seventh Seal to give away T-shirts and conduct Q&A’s as Wiseau often does with The Room. However, the combination of this absurd and illogical script, outrageous characters and shoddy directing with
Wiseau’s mysterious persona gives The Room its cult appeal. Wiseau is in talks to make a Broadway musical of the film and Paul Rudd has stated he wants to be in a scene for scene remake. A similar situation occurred with Ed Wood’s Plan 9 From Outer Space; it was rediscovered by Michael and Harry Medved in their Golden Turkey awards and now two remakes are in production. One wonders though why we get this bizarre enjoyment from bad cinema. One could say popular bad film does not require a lot of thought, it is why a person will often turn to a trash television programme and the end of their day rather than a French New Wave film. The argument that the pleasure of mindlessness gives one a thrill could in a parallel way be attributed to film. The comedic value and positive feelings generated cannot be underestimated either. On the other hand, as with another cult classic The Rocky Horror Picture Show, part of The Room’s appeal is the love of ritual. Audience members, for example, bring disposable cutlery to the screenings to hurl when the famed framed plastic spoon appears; when the young neighbour enters the room the audience shouts along with characters onscreen, “Hi Denny!”; and a scene in which the two main male protagonists take a break from their day to play American football in tuxedoes spurs the audience to hurl footballs at each other in the aisles. It’s all about the interactive experience. Wendy Cook of the Hyde Park Picture House in Leeds where screenings were held says, “Cinemas love it because when you’re trying to persuade people to come out instead of watching a film at home, anything that makes it more of an event is essential. Every instinct says you should be quiet in the cinema. So it’s a bizarre night out.”
Part of this is to do with a sort of herd mentality. Viewing a film and interacting at a cinema in a group is a very unusual. The experience of watching the film becomes more of an event. My own personal experience watching the film for the first time at the Prince Charles and being unaware of all the rituals hampered my personal enjoyment somewhat. However being surrounded by this swarm of people and abject excitement, I couldn’t help but get absorbed in the mass happiness.
Love film? Up for watching just about anything? Roar! Film gets press invites to everything from new blockbusters to boutique film festivals - even over the summer! Get on the writers’ mailing list by emailing Beth at film @ roarnews.co.uk
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Sports
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
Edited by Charlotte Richardson sports@roarnews.co.uk
Have you had a phenomenal season? Promotion? Tournament champions? Get in touch with Roar! and update us with all your success.
KCL MOTORSPORT FINISH 9TH IN NATIONAL KARTING CHAMPIONSHIPS Hussain Rashid, James Wong, James Williams The morning of the race came and the weather forecast was dodgy. It ranged between ‘Solemnly Broody’ and ‘feckin’ shit’ depending on whether your meteorology student of choice was from Oxford Brookes or Dublin University. It turned out that they were both right, with a few drops of rain keeping drivers honest throughout the day. But the overcast conditions did not manage to dampen the excitement of the 130 drivers gathered at Buckmore Park Karting Circuit for the final race of the 2012 British Universities Karting Championships (BUKC). With a solid mid-table position secured we were in a position to go all out at Buckmore and try and sneak into the top 10 of the championship standings. As the time for racing drew nearer the self-dubbed technical analyst Hussain Rashid reminded the drivers that “The race can’t be won on the first lap, but it can be lost!” a line almost certainly stolen from Martin Brundle’s F1 commentary. But these words certainly showed some wisdom once the races began in usual karting style: absolute chaos. However all of the KCL drivers somehow managed to avoid the huge variety of spins, crashes and incidents on the first lap. Samir ‘Bathed’ Gandhi (so named after being famously drenched at Llandow circuit from ploughing into puddles)
profited most from this early chaos by floating up from 12th to 6th within 2 laps. However one kamikaze driver, red in the face at being overtaken, purposefully punted him off the track dropping him down to 18th. However Samir shot back up the order within a few laps up to 10th in a cracking recovery drive. Or at least it appeared that way until he span the kart dropping him back down to 20th to complete a drive that can only be compared to a game of snakes and ladders! However not every race was as exciting, especially the one fronted by Julian ‘Iceman’ Kosh. His smooth but fast driving style really paid dividends in the tricky conditions. With a top speed measured at over 65mph, racing these karts on the edge is an adrenaline rush that beats almost anything you can experience (legally). In the end Julian managed to steer his kart home in 3rd place, closing in on Nottingham University in second place at over 0.3s a lap! This fantastic performance won King’s its first ever podium, and comes with a substantial financial reward that can be written as a single digit (0). Elsewhere, James Williams and James Wong, two usually very consistent and steady drivers were also setting new KCL records by getting the first ever black-flags for dangerous driving! This is the racing equivalent of an ‘after school detention’ which involves driving into the pit lane and being held stationery for 20
seconds. However on rejoining the race both managed to climb back up the rankings to respectable finishes courtesy of some cool calm driving at the tail end of the race. ‘Crazy’ Ken Eu also lit up the race track in his own inimitable style with deathdefying overtakes that invoke grimaces and grins alike. And all this whilst on painkillers for a sprained wrist! And finally, Kireth ‘Cyclops’ Kalirai drove a race that nearly overshadowed them all. Having a contact lens fall out within the first lap of a race on a damp track would almost certainly be terminal to most drivers’ chances. However Kireth somehow managed to navigate his way around the racing line with an instinctive Senna-like knack for visualising the race track through his fingertips and by the smell of exhaust fumes. Unfortunately it ended with an anti-climatic 21st place finish due to a late mugging by a fellow driver’s overambitious overtake attempt. But as the saying goes, that’s racing. Overall, KCL Motorsport placed 9th which is a tremendous result, bringing us into the coveted top 10 position which was what we aimed for all year. Given more chiselling, we are absolutely confident of hitting that top 5 position by the next BUKC Rookies. Thanks again to KCLSU for their support and our sponsors 888.com. Track our progress as we blog about our experience at http://kclmotorsport.wordpress.com and find us on Facebook (search KCL Motorsport Club!). You could be our next team-mate!
KCL Ultimate Frisbee enjoy dizzying heights of most successful season to date Fowzia Mahmood KCL’s Ultimate Frisbee team ‘Thrown’ ended this season bigger and better than ever before. From our first tournament in Brighton- we had around 45 players
of mostly fresher’s- to our last big weekend in Manchester for Nationals, where King’s were represented by our open (men’s) team who qualified for their spot, as well as a women’s and alumni team for the first time; this year’s achievements prove that we have developed to be
one of the hardest playing, incredibly spirited and greatest party teams in the country. Together, we have sent 22 teams over 13 tournaments in various divisions, including qualifying for nationals in indoor and outdoor regionals, as
well as winning the coveted ‘Spirit of the Game’ title for Open Indoor Nationals. We will even be sending a team to Italy over the summer for a beach ultimate tournament against international teams! Aside from tournaments, the team
has bonded through our famous socials such as thanksgiving, karaoke, bake offs, speed dating and of course sports night at Guy’s bar after an afternoon of practice in Hyde Park. It’s been a fantastic year, and if you’ve missed out, join in on all the fun next year, you won’t regret it!
Sports
Roar!, May 15th - September 20th 2012
KCL Hockey Club Celebrate Quadruple Promotion Bryony Stevens
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Sports ed note Charlotte Richardson Legs heavy, minds tired, stamina faltering, will power waning; no, I’m not referring to the run up to exams but the end of another really amazing sporting season at King’ s !
This season has been one of great success on and off the field for King’s Hockey Club. Three out of four teams have earned promotion and the Ladies’ 2s saved themselves from relegation with a well-deserved draw against the top team of the league in the last game of the season. The Men’s 1s were promoted in both of their leagues, and the Ladies’ 1s and Men’s 2s earned promotion in their BUCs leagues.
It’s also our final issue of Roar! too for this academic year, so I write to say farewell in the capacity of sport’s editor (don’t be too concerned or party too hard because I’m sticking around to be your VPSME next year…)
The Ladies’ 2s greatly improved their game in the second half of the season right up to the last game with their hard work paying off. Next season they hope to keep this level up to push for a high position in all competitions. Off the field, this season has seen a complete integration between the men’s and women’s clubs, promising a closer relationship for the future. This has made Wednesday night socials and the more formal occasions all the more enjoyable. We have also enjoyed a strong link with the King’s and Alleyn’s Hockey Club who many of our Alumni and students play for. This has given players the opportunity to play at weekends, go to (even more!) socials and network with professionals. I think I can say on behalf of the whole club that we look forward to continuing this all round success into next season.
It’s been a pleasure to cover the ups and downs of King’s sporting life over the past nine months. Amongst all the promotions, trophies and glory, my role as Sports’ ed. has enabled me to witness, however cliché or corny, how sport brings people together. Before my work with Roar! I thought I was unique in finding friends for life at KCL Netball Club and whilst my girls rock and are an incredible group of people to call my friends, I have come to realise that I am certainly not unique, nor am I alone, in feeling so passionately about my sport and my team.
Men’s President Will Orton had this to say: “Being President of the Men’s club this year has been an absolute privilege. Both teams have completely exceeded expectations with the Second team gaining BUCs promotion to 3b and the First team gaining BUCs promotion to 1A, ULU league promotion and beating UCL in the ULU cup final. Not to mention a convincing win over the medics in the macadam cup. It’s exciting times for King’s Hockey club. Next year we will be up against more traditional ‘hockey universities’ such as Reading, making it difficult to replicate the success had this year so we are always on the lookout for new talent to add to our squad depth. I would personally like to thank everyone at the club for making this year so successful and so enjoyable.” Ladies’ President Chloe Edinborough added: “King’s College Hockey Club has been an integral part of my university career from day one, and being able to finish my final year as President of the Girl’s Club has been an honour. Both teams have done their university proud, with the first team winning the BUCs League and earning promotion, whilst the second team valiantly battled to remain in their current league. The fresh bond between the KCL Alumni team and the students has definitely played a huge role in the successes of the club this year. Celebrating our first Duel Day tournament signified a relationship and tradition which I cannot wait to see grow over the coming years. It has been a great privilege to be a part of such an enthusiastic team at King’s and I would personally like to thank everyone in the club for making this year so wonderful.” From September, we will obviously be taking on new freshers, but we are open to people of all ages and abilities joining the club. For more information, go to our Facebook page: www. facebook.com/KCLHC or to www.facebook.com/kingsaalleynshockeyclub for King’s & Alleyn’s Hockey Club, and come and visit us at the Freshers’ Fair in September.
Success is nice and success is preferable, but having people to laugh with when you’re stressed beyond your mind with dissertation woe, to enjoy competing at 9 o’clock at night on a Monday in the snow, to chuckle when you finally make your fixture in Acton having been halfway to Berrylands, to put GKT rivalry aside on the Tutu’s dance floor; all these are things I can say I take away with me as I prepare to face the big, wide world and leave my undergrad days behind me. And whilst that daunting thought is tempered by the fact I have the honour to extend my stay as one of your sabbs for another year, and have a scrumptious summer schedule of sport to relish, the Lword comes to mind. Legacy. A word bantered around East London particularly, with Sebastian Coe and his team repeatedly stating that their aim for the Olympics is to create a legacy. Although I can’t boast of gold medals or trophies, in years to come I will be able to tell anyone willing to listen about my 2012 at King’s and all the stories from Berrylands, Honor Oak Park, Waterfront , Macadam, Varsity, Walkabout and so much more. And I know you have your stories too. All of us are part of King’s legacy: a legacy we can be proud of and one that could certainly give Usain Bolt a run for his money! See you next year!