Juggling marriage and school

Sara and Austin Zacher say having a partner and best friend helps them balance all the aspects of college life. Photos by Chad Hsieh

Married couples at BYU–Hawaii say having a spouse helps them balance school, work and home life

BY MICHAEL KRAFT

BYU–Hawaii married couples said having a spouse motivates them to work harder in school, strengthens their spirituality, and helps them maintain a healthy balance between school, work and home life.

The balancing act

BYUH Religion Associate Professor Daniel Sharp said, “For me school became much more about making sure I can support my wife.” Sharp said he married his wife, Carrie, 23 years ago while they were still students.

After getting married, he said he “became a lot more focused. I knew why I was at school and what I needed to get done.” Sharp added getting married in college made school easier. Having to balance your social life with your student life is a problem for any student no matter what.”

In order to pay for his education, Sharp said his wife postponed her school. Now 23 years later, Carrie Sharp is a student at BYUH working on her degree. Daniel Sharp shared with a smile, “Now she’s a grown adult going to college working on her degree as a mother of five. So, we’re doing it again. We’re learning to balance school, work and family much later in our life.”

Carrie Sharp said she enjoys being in school again, but she loves her family and makes sure they are her priority. She shared she is grateful to always have her best friend, her husband, while in school. “It’s good to know there’s always someone in my corner.”

Daniel Sharp said the support he felt from his wife is what helped him the most as a student. “The thing that I remember the most was that I knew I had someone in my corner and that she had my back.”

Church callings, according to Jerico Radin, a junior from the Philippines majoring in computer science, helped him and his wife balance their busy life. He and his wife, Jenine Radin, are Sunday School teachers. “As Sunday School teachers, we can spend meaningful time

together, fulfill our calling and grow together at the same time. This calling is such a blessing for our family.”

Jenine Radin shared they developed unity through their calling. “Being Sunday School teachers taught us about preparedness. It reinforced it in our lives, especially now that we have a daughter.”

Sara Zacher, a sophomore from Canada majoring in education, who married her husband, Austin Zacher, in August, said she loves being in a strong partnership with her best friend. “I know it’s a cliché, but I just love that we are always serving each other.

“The other day, I had so much work to do, and I was super stressed. Austin made me dinner without me asking or anything. He just did it.”

Sara Zacher said it is important to her to maintain a balance between home and school, so she makes an effort to “keep school at school.” Then, at home, she said she and her husband can focus on each other and their relationship.

Enjoy life

According to Carrie Sharp, it is important for students to enjoy their lives to the fullest. “When I was younger, I thought that my life was going start up down the line. So, don’t forget to live it and enjoy it.”

Daniel Sharp added, “We have to learn as a couple that sometimes we have to sacrifice what we want to help the other person succeed. That’s really what marriage is about. “The Savior sacrificed His will, figuring out how to do the will of the Father instead of His own will – not doing what was best for him, but what’s best for others, and that’s what marriage is all about.”

Spending quality time

The Radins said they have been married for over a year and recently welcomed a baby girl into their family. Jerico Radin said, “I wish I had known how to take care of a baby. I knew how to take care of my wife because we dated before we got married, but when we had my daughter, I had to learn all at once.

“It’s been a struggle, but it’s the most precious time. I love being with my baby. It’s the most important thing for me.”

Austin Zacher, an exercise science major from Montana, said spending quality time

“I think that we have to learn as a couple that sometimes we have to sacrifice what we want to help the other person succeed. That’s really what marriage is about.” - Daniel Sharp

together is as simple as going to the temple weekly. “Honestly, going to the temple weekly has been the best thing we could do to spend time together, especially because it’s so close to us here in Laie.”

He said if he had not attended the temple weekly, he would not have been able to marry his wife. “I’m not perfect, and Sara isn’t perfect either. Our marriage isn’t perfect, but it works because we go to the temple weekly.”

The Radins said they balance school, work and taking care of a newborn, by supporting each other.

According to Jerico Radin, “My wife supports me and is always involved in my life. It goes the other way too. We support each other and lift each other up.”

Jenine Radin added, “It takes time, effort, a lot of prayers, and patience to build the life that we want for our forever family.”

Austin Zacher, said, “When I’m in class and school, I need to work hard so later in the Graphics by Lynne Hardy

day I can focus on Sara and not be thinking about school or work. When I’m in the library, I buckle down and focus, so I can be there for Sara.”

Sara Zacher added, “I think one of the things I learned very quickly is there is a difference between having time together and spending time together.”

Echoing his wife, Austin Zacher said, “Just sitting on the couch, doing homework, making dinner, that’s different than spending quality time with each other. That’s two separate things. You need to find time to spend quality time together.” •