Vol. 17.8
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January 2016
Inspiration
for Your Wedding
Preparing for
Happily Ever After
Webb & Adrienne Chastain
Sharing Advice for Before & After Your Wedding Day
Faith @ Work Mike & Jo Yates
Plus: Monthly Columns Book Reviews Calendar Support Groups
FRAZER ATLANTA HIGHWAY • CONTEMPORARY AND TRADITIONAL SERVICES • 8:00, 9:30 & 11:00 AM FRAZER PIKE ROAD • STARTING FEB. 7, 2016 • 10:00 AM IN THE PIKE ROAD SCHOOL
C O M I N G F E B . 7, 2 0 1 6
Worship: Sundays 10am in the Pike Road School Find Hope. Follow Jesus. www.frazer.church @frazerumc
Volume 17, Issue 8
Feature Articles
JAN UARY 2 0 1 6 Columns page 2
Publisher’s Note
page 12
Jason Watson
Faith @ Work
Mike and Jo Yates share their journey with the Lord, including physical healings both have recently experienced and how they have nurtured a strong 33 year marriage.
page 4
Pastor's Perspective Reed DePace, First Presbyterian Church Montgomery
page 11
Pondering the Journey Sam Whatley
page 16
page 14
Preparing for Happily Ever After
Pastor Kemi Searcy
by Lisa Conn
Having a beautiful wedding is one thing, having a beautiful marriage is quite another. Here you’ll find important advice to prepare for a lasting marriage, starting during engagement and even before.
Women Arising page 31
Counselor’s Corner Nancy Thomas, LPC
page 32
The Intersection
page 20
Bob Crittenden
Inspiration for Your 2016 Wedding
page 36
Dave $ays Dave Ramsey
by Mary Sanders, Mary Me Brides
Resident wedding expert Mary Sanders shares the hottest trends in colors, cakes, photography and more...all for your 2016 wedding.
In Every Issue page 6
Books to Read page 24
Newlyweds Webb & Adrienne Chastain
The happy couple shares about the months leading up to their wedding and how they prepared for a healthy marriage. *Photo by Little Acorn Photography. 1
page 8
Around Our Community page 28
Support Groups page 34
Christian Community Calendar January 2016
River Region’s Journey
Our Mission... We believe the Good News concerning the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ is worth sharing with our friends and neighbors in the River Region. Each month we deliver this life-changing message to the centers of activity across our community in a user-friendly and relevant way to empower and equip all those seeking to grow closer to God. Join us in this mission by sharing a copy with your neighbor or by becoming an advertising partner starting next month.
Editor DeAnne Watson deanne@readjourneymagazine.com
Publisher
Jason Watson jason@readjourneymagazine.com
Associate Publisher Gena Hill
Research Editor Wendy McCollum
Contributing Writers Tim Challies Lisa Conn Bob Crittenden Rev. Reed DePace Dave Ramsey Mary Sanders Kemi Searcy Nancy Thomas, LPC Sam Whatley
Advertising Opportunities Jason Watson ads@readjourneymagazine.com (334) 213-7940 ext 703
Ad Design
Tim Welch, Welch Designs
Distribution Team Kristy Brennan Wendy McCollum Chris Mitchell, Manager Manzie Moore Richard Ward Lesa Youngblood
From the Publisher Many years ago we decided to devote our January issue to weddings. Our thought was that since God is the author of marriage, where a man and woman come together as one to serve God, each other and their neighbors, Journey would be a perfect venue to share advice and wisdom for couples planning a wedding. There are many “bridal” publications, but I have yet to see any that offer what this issue offers. Not only are we sharing the latest wedding trends and planning tips, but also how you and your future spouse can have an amazing marriage...till death do you part. We are so fortunate to have one of the best wedding planners, Mary Sanders with Mary Me Brides, writing again in this issue. Mary has helped so many couples create a special wedding day, and on page 20 she offers some of her expertise Experiencing the blessing of with you. I know you noticed the glowing couple on marriage for 21 years. our cover, Webb and Adrienne Chastain. Well we didn’t just bring them in for their looks. As newlyweds, Webb and Adrienne are fresh off planning their own wedding, so we asked them to share advice for before & after the wedding day on page 24. There are so many details that go into making a wedding day the very special memory it should be. But, it would be foolish to plan so much for the first day of your marriage while neglecting the planning that’s needed to make your marriage a lasting success. Lisa Conn, a regular contributor, has written Preparing for Happily Ever After on page 16. Lisa and her husband Mike have mentored hundreds of couples and helped them obtain the blessing of a biblical marriage. Here she is sharing the top marriage tips she and Mike have learned along way. For a personal testimony of what it looks like to have God at the center of your marriage, turn to page 12 for this month’s Faith @ Work column where we interview Mike and Jo Yates. When we say our vows we commit to loving our spouse in sickness and in health. Mike and Jo’s marriage is a story of God’s faithfulness and the fruit of marriage that comes from relying on God’s power and hope. If you’re an engaged couple I want you to know we’ve put this month’s issue together to help you get started on the right foot and to continue down that path. Becoming one with another person in marriage is one of the greatest gifts this side of Heaven, but it can be hard work as you meld into each other. Work hard to make your wedding day beautiful and work even harder to make your marriage just as special and beautiful. If you do, your marriage will constantly return blessing upon blessing on you, your spouse and one day - your children. May God bless you and your spouse-to-be!
River Region’s Journey is published monthly by Keep Sharing, P.O. Box 230367, Montgomery, AL 36123. For information, call 334-213-7940. River Region’s Journey is copyrighted 2015 by KeepSharing. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or part without written permission is prohibited. The opinions expressed in River Region’s Journey are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the view of the owners, nor do they constitute an endorsement of products or services herein. River Region’s Journey has the right to refuse any content that is not consistent with its statement of faith.
River Region’s Journey
January 2016
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CHRISTCHURCH 8800 Vaughn Road
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Founded Upon God’s Word At Christchurch, Holy Scripture serves as the final authority for our teaching and preaching. Indeed, over the course of three years, almost the entire Bible is read aloud and preached upon.
Warm and Loving
Liturgically Joyful At Christchurch worship involves the entire congregation, as we offer God praise, thanksgiving and adoration using worship traditions that can be traced back to the earliest days of the Church. Our worship is not designed to entertain us, but to honor the true “audience” of worship, the Lord!
By God’s grace and through His Spirit, the people of Christchurch enjoy the richness and joy of being a true family. We’d love for you to become a part of us! Regardless of who you are, you will always find a home at Christchurch.
Committed to Mission The people of Christchurch respond to God’s Word by going out into the world, to places like Uganda, Guatemala and Montgomery, proclaiming the good news of Jesus and joyfully serving as His hands and feet!
Sundays: 9:30 a.m. Worship 11:00 a.m. Christian Education for All Ages Weekly: Discipleship and fellowship opportunities abound
Find us on Facebook and visit us at www.christchurchXP.net 3
January 2016
River Region’s Journey
Pastor’s Perspective
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Reverend Reed DePace, First Presbyterian Montgomery
Never Say NEVER, Always Say JESUS How to Recover from Disappointments and Absolutes in Marriage She couldn’t believe it! Her “happily ever after” man: what happened to him?! He used to be so caring, so attentive. Now he NEVER…!!! What happened to her?! This princess who made all his dreams come true: what happened to her?! She used to admire him constantly. Now she ALWAYS…!!! The promises of perpetual marital bliss all but disappear in the day to day disappointments we give to each other in our marriages. And, in moments regretted later on, we snap out those absolute words we know aren’t true. “He NEVER [fill in the blank, sisters],” “She ALWAYS [fill in the blank, brothers],” is not true ALL the time. Looking to our spouse to complete us, something they can’t and aren’t supposed to do, we disappoint each other, use our absolute words, and wound our relationship even more. And if we’re not careful, our disappointments and absolutes may lead to the death of love in divorce. The gospel offers three steps to recover from our marriage disappointments and absolutes.
First – Repent. It is a simple rule: whenever you find yourself in a difficult situation with your spouse, first look for your own sin. The world and your flesh will argue against this. But Jesus, who is the light (John 1:4-5), convinces us of truth about sin and frees us from it. Imagine a conversation in which your spouse just said the “wrong thing.” Your temperature rises and your thoughts lock onto crafting word-weapons to humble your spouse into begging your forgiveness. Just then the Spirit keeps Jesus’ promise and reminds you: How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye,’ when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother’s eye. (Luke 6:42 ESV) “But what if I don’t have any sin in the situation?” you may ask. How do you know you haven’t sinned? Scripture tells us that we can lie to ourselves about our thoughts, desires, judgments, and choices so effectively River Region’s Journey
January 2016
that we won’t catch on (Jeremiah 17:9)! Even if you don’t have sin in the situation, shouldn’t you rely on the Spirit of Truth to show you that (John 15:26; 14:6)? Why not start with the possibility that maybe in this situation you are at least wrongly motivated, if not more? What do you have to lose? If you’re free of sin, the Spirit will encourage you to go to the next step. And if you’re not, the Spirit will show you where your flesh is still trying to assert itself. You and your spouse will only benefit if you first look to your own sin.
Second – Forgive. Now that you’ve repented, of at least the desire to give your spouse “the look,” you’re ready for the next step. This too is a simple step: forgive your spouse of their sin. This isn’t as hard as you might think. Consider the next scene in your conversation with your spouse. So after you’ve let go your desire to humble them, what do you want to do? Doesn’t the Spirit who graced you to repent also restore your love for your spouse? What is the one thing they most need from you at that moment? Forgiveness (Colossians 3:12-13). Don’t rely on your own strength here. Just as you needed the Spirit’s gracing you with Jesus to repent, so also you need Jesus to enable you to forgive your spouse: Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. (Hebrews 12:1-3) It is as we consider Jesus, as we look at Him in faith, that we observe all the ways He perfectly obeyed and paid for us. This prompts us to cry out in faith and ask the Spirit, “Give me more of Jesus and His life!” Remember that Jesus forgave in circumstances worse than we will ever face with our spouse. So perfectly did Jesus endure 4
his enemies’ crucifying hatred that when He prayed for their salvation–they were saved (Luke 23:34; Acts 2:23, 36; 3:13-15; 4:4; 6:7)! He offers you this same perfect life to be your resource to forgive your spouse for their MUCH smaller sin against you. Let’s practice right now. Take a moment and call out to Jesus. Tell Him you need Him and His life to enable you to forgive your spouse.
Third – Faith. Okay, so after repenting and forgiving, you’re now ready to help your spouse with their part of the situation. Free of the irritating speck-sin in your own eye, having forgiven them for the log-sin jutting from their eye, you’re now ready to help them remove it (carefully!). You do this not by following some list of flesh-empowered actions, but solely by the actions of faith. The faith-actions in this situation are as wide and varied as the sins we commit against one another. Yet they all have this as their common denominator: Jesus’ love. Consider one last time the conversation with your spouse. You’ve repented. You’ve received Jesus’ power to forgive. What is left for you to do for your spouse, still suffering from their own sin? Is it not just to love on them, to see them experience the same repentance and forgiveness you’ve experienced? And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. (Colossians 3:14) The Spirit who spoke the light of Jesus into you so you could repent of your sin, the Spirit who led you to rely on Christ’s perfections, this same Spirit will now lead you in showing love for your spouse. And guess what your spouse’s response will be? They too will find Jesus’ presence for repenting, forgiving, and loving. About those absolutes? Never say “NEVER!” Instead, always say “JESUS!” He will surely answer.. Reverend Reed DePace is the pastor of First Presbyterian Montgomery, The Church @ Chantilly, located near the corner of Vaughn Road and Chantilly Parkway.
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Our Statement of Faith In keeping with Protestant theology, we believe that the Bible, as contained in the 66 books of the Old and New Testaments, is fully inspired by God and therefore inerrant in the original manuscripts. The Bible is the only essential and infallible record of God’s self-disclosure to mankind. The Scriptures are the authoritative and normative rule and guide of all Christian life, practice, and doctrine. They are totally sufficient and must not be added to, superseded, or changed by later tradition, extra-biblical revelation, or worldly wisdom. The Bible is perfect in every way and shows us how to become and live as Christians. The way of becoming a Christian is by faith alone in Jesus Christ, the only Son of God, who came to us, born of a virgin, in full human form while remaining fully God. Jesus was, and is, perfect, and was crucified so that others could live. Three days later He rose from the dead, never to die again. He ascended into heaven and sat down at the right hand of God the Father, where He, the only mediator between God and man, continually makes intercession for His own. Those who have faith in Jesus as their Lord in this life, and Savior from damnation in the next life, now live by the guidance of the Holy Spirit, becoming more like Jesus everyday. We believe that God is one God. The one God has three persons: the Father, Jesus the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Just as God is one, so also, all believers are to be one. We believe in the unity and fellowship of all those that have faith in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. We are one in Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ is the Head of the Church, His Body, which is composed of all men, living and dead, who have been joined to Him through saving faith. *All editorial content published needs to be in agreement with our Statement of Faith
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The Plausibility Problem by Ed Shaw Jesus said, “I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full” (John 10:10). This is what we all want, isn’t it? We all want a fulfilled and fulfilling life. But what does this life look like? How and where can I find it? What will it cost me? That’s the rub, isn’t it? The world around me teaches that this kind of life comes by identifying what and who I am and then pursuing it all the way. There is no room here for self-denial. There is no room here for setting aside desires for the good of others. No, liberty and fulfillment come when I full-out pursue my desires, even at the expense of others. Freedom and bravery are expressed in what for all the world looks like selfishness. But what about the Christian? This is where Ed Shaw’s excellent new book comes in. This is a book with two titles. When I bought it, it was titled The Plausibility Problem: The Church and Same-Sex Attraction. When I see it on Amazon today it is listed as Same-Sex Attraction and the Church: The Surprising Plausibility of the Celibate Life. If I understand correctly, the first of those titles is aimed at a European audience and the second at a North American audience, and between them they give a good sense of what it is all about. Ed Shaw is a pastor in the United Kingdom and one who has always experienced same-sex attraction. He does not want to and has tried not to, but, at the end of the day, only feels romantic and sexual attraction for men. Yet he understands that the Bible forbids him from acting on this. While friends, River Region’s Journey
January 2016
family, and the world around him tell him to go ahead and to indulge, he remains fully committed to what the Bible says about sex and marriage being between only a husband and a wife. He understands that the “full life” Jesus offers must be for him, too, even if it is a life of self-denial in such a foundational way. He believes that we, as Christians, have a plausibility problem when it comes to people who experience same-sex attraction. We do not offer a plausible alternative to the message society gives us about homosexuality. The cries from outside the church are strong and powerful and promise liberation. They tell us that fulfillment can come only by acceptance and indulgence. Many who profess Christ are now saying the very same thing. The church, on the other hand—the church committed to the authority of God’s Word, that is—offers answers that seem far less compelling. But that is simply because we have not fully understood and embraced what Christ offers to those who struggle in this way. The heart of Shaw’s book is a series of 9 missteps Christians and their churches take when considering the issue of homosexuality and in actually accepting and ministering to Christians who are same-sex attracted. Some are related specifically to homosexuality, while others are far more general and applicable to all of us. Let me trace the 2nd misstep as an example of the latter. The second misstep Shaw identifies is the emphasis we place on the utter centrality of the nuclear family. Of course, it is good to emphasize family and to call upon parents to build strong families, yet, as Shaw says, “One of the most radical changes between the two Testaments seems to be that the biological family matters much less than it used to. In the Old Testament, 6
having a wife and children was seen as a sign of God’s blessing (see Psalm 128). In the New Testament, it’s noticeable that the stress is now on growing the church rather than your own biological family; its two dominant figures – Jesus and Paul – were both single.” With our emphasis on family, we may inadvertently downplay the new kind of family relationship God wishes for us to understand and pursue. “The impression that we unintentionally give is that the church is made up of biological families, and that unless you are part of one of these conveniently shaped building blocks, you won’t ever fit in.” We need to ensure we have equal emphasis on this new kind of family God is building—a family of Christians who may not share any biological connection. This, then, provides family to those who may never have their own. “When church feels like a family, I can cope with not ever having my own partner and children. When it hasn’t worked is when I have struggled most. The same-sex attracted Christians I’ve met who are suffering most are those in churches that haven’t grasped this at all and that don’t even notice these individuals.” There is, of course, an application: So, do you want to help make biblical teaching on homosexuality seem reasonable? Do you want to help tackle the plausibility problem? Then start acting out the Christian reality that family = church, whatever life circumstance God has put you in. Recognize the misstep that family = Mum, Dad and 2.4 children is. It will help others (and you), more than you know. The fact is, the problem of same-sex attraction is not one that needs to be solved only by those who experience it. No, it is a problem for us to address as church communities. Shaw’s book is just the latest in a number of excellent titles pushing Christians to better understand and serve those who experience same-sex attraction. It helpfully identifies specific concerns and shows how the Bible calls us to meet them in God’s way. It does all of this with a firm grounding in Scripture and without an ounce of compromise. I highly recommend it.
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River Region’s Journey
Soul Shop™: Suicide Prevention Training February 1, 2016 6:30-8 pm (Open to the public) February 2, 8 a.m. – 4 p.m. (specifically for Clergy, Church Staff, and Lay Ministers) Hosted by The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. and held at First UMC, 2416 West Cloverdale Park, in Montgomery Soul Shop™ Trains Church Leaders to Save Lives In an effort to stem the rising tide of suicide in the River Region, The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. is bringing Soul Shop™ to our community. Soul Shop™ is a suicide prevention training and includes a daylong training session specifically designed to train church leaders, clergy, program staff, lay ministers, office staff, and faith-based therapists to detect the signs of someone contemplating suicide and possibly save their life. Additionally, Soul Shop™ trains Church leaders how to minister to surviving family members after a suicide. Please join First United Methodist Church-Montgomery, First United Methodist ChurchPrattville and Grace Pointe Church in sponsoring this important workshop for Clergy, Church staff, lay ministers, and other faith related institutions. BestMinds,LLC, is a ministry engaged in helping people deal with difficult life situations, with a specific focus on suicidal desperation. Owner and President J. Russell Crabtree has trained thousands of persons in developing awareness and intervention skills. His book, A Second Day, a Hopeful Journey Out of Suicidal Thinking, chronicles his own personal struggle with suicide. He developed Soul Shop™ specifically to help leaders in faith communities address those impacted by suicidal desperation. His goal is to equip the leaders of 20,000 persons by the year 2020. To learn more please contact us: The Samaritan Counseling Center, 2911 Zelda Road, Montgomery, AL 36106. Call 334-262-7787 or nthomas@tsccenter.org.
The Journey Continues... Tim Tebow
January 2016
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The Cancer Wellness Foundation is pleased to announce “The Journey Continues...Tim Tebow” on January 16, 2016, at the Montgomery Performing Arts Center. Guests will enjoy a special evening of engagement with Tim Tebow, ESPN SEC Network Analyst. By the end of his college career, Tebow had already won two NCAA Football Championships, earned the Davey O’Brien Award as the nation’s best quarterback, and was the first sophomore to win the Heisman Trophy. In his first professional season, he led the Broncos to their first playoff game in five years and went on to play for the New York Jets. The event will be held at the Montgomery Performing Arts Center (201 Tallapoosa Street, downtown Montgomery). For general admission tickets: Call MPAC 334-481-5100 or www.mpaconline.org The following seats do not include VIP Passes: Balcony $60 Loge $89; Mezzanine $117 Orchestra $174 For all in attendance, the evening includes:Silent Auction in the Atrium, Tim Tebow’s talk, Live Auction with Tebow of sports items autographed by Tebow Sponsorship Packages with VIP Reception Passes are still available. A limited number of individual VIP Passes ($400 each) are available by calling Lucile Waller at 334-273-2279. All proceeds benefit the Cancer Wellness Foundation. For information visit www.cancerwellnessfoundation.org. Individual VIP Passes include: VIP Reception (photo with Tebow) and Orchestra Level Seating The Cancer Wellness Foundation of Central Alabama, a non-profit 501c3 organization, is thankful to our sponsors and those in attendance on January 16th. Your generosity will enable us to continue our efforts in helping local cancer patients. River Region’s Journey
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Breaking Free From an Unhealthy Lifestyle
Women’s Symposium/January 16 Are you ready to BREAK FREE? Join us to learn: How to live HAPPY when your world is turned upside down • How to find and keep strong sister friends • How to feast abundantly on life and overcome the $2 Tuesday mentality • How to calm your mind, body, and spirit with Christian yoga • How to eat well from the garden and break free from being overfed and undernourished • How to ease your aches and cleanse your home with essential oils Hosted by Landmark Church, in the Life Center, from 9 am to 3 pm Call Terry Dees, (334) 233-0646 or Aleah Goode (334) 221-5340 to register or visit 1140balance.com/lifeunchained.
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Dream Women’s Conference at Saint James UMC January 2223. Dream Women’s Conference featuring: awardwinning curriculum developer, best selling books author, and co-founder of Messenger International Lisa Bevere, and world renowned Christian musician, Christy Nockles! This event is going to sell out fast so register NOW online or in our church lobby, 9045 Vaughn Road! Call 294-4052 or visit itickets.com.
Operation Christmas Child Supported BIG by Frazer UMC The Frazer Family responded in a BIG way to Operation Christmas Child! Staff and volunteers loaded a flatbed truck and a pickup truck with 1103 shoeboxes packed with love and gifts for children all over the world. Operation Christmas Child likes to say a small shoebox can have a big impact. What goes into the box is fun, but what comes out of it is eternal. The shoeboxes are shipped to some of the hardest to reach countries where children may never have a chance to hear about Jesus.
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Sanctity of Life Memorial Service for Those Who Have Lost Loved Ones As Christians, we believe that we are called to “weep with those who weep.” We want to walk with individuals in their grief and to honor and remember the lives of those they have lost. On Sunday, January 24, 2016, at 7:00 p.m. Christchurch Montgomery will welcome families who are grieving the loss of a loved one for a service of healing and hope. Whether the loss is recent or in the distant past, we want those who grieve to experience the deep and abiding mercy of the God who longs to bind their broken hearts. If you have experienced this kind of loss, please consider joining us for this special service. Please call Dolly McLemore at 334-301-3490 or check our website www.christchurchxp.net for more information. Christchurch is located at 8800 Vaughn Road, Montgomery, Alabama.
Hope Inspired Ministries Extra Mile Saturday, January 9 Registration opens at 7 a.m. and races begin at 8 a.m. HIM teaches students to go the extra mile in all that they do and wants runners to go the extra mile as well! Runners will have the option to participate in the 5K or 10K, with each group going an “extra mile” to complete the race. The Extra Mile will be an event for runners and will also be a time of fun for the entire family with food from local restaurants, face painting, music, entertainment for the kids and more. Registration fees range from $20 to $35. Runners can register online or email leannejordan7@gmail.com or call (334) 318-5864. More info available on Facebook.
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Forgiveness...the Healing Power The Lord is real keen on forgiveness. And, if you continue seeking God, He will speak to you about forgiving others. He may even choose to speak through you. Years ago I was buying groceries for my family when an odd item was added to the list. I was asked to buy flowers and deliver them at the hospital to a lady I didn’t know. She had been absent from work for several weeks and was said to be getting worse every day. I was reluctant to do it, but I figured it would only take me ten minutes, so why not? I left the groceries in the car, took the flowers in the hospital, and found the room. The woman was hooked up to tubes and looked very weak. She seemed depressed and angry. I nervously told her who sent the flowers and prepared to leave. She sighed and said the doctors could do nothing for her, but it didn’t matter, she probably would not live very long, anyway. Right at that moment something snapped in my spirit. Without hesitation I blurted out, “You have to forgive him.” Her eyes glared at me. She said, “You don’t know what he has done.” I thought, you are right. I don’t know what he has done. I don’t even know who he is. For that matter, I don’t even know who you are. But something else came out of my mouth. I replied, “If you don’t forgive him, you will die.” Now that part stunned me a little. Her eyes went wide open and for a moment she was speechless. That was a good thing, because that was when I said “goodbye” and left the room, feeling scared and stupid. All the way home I kept asking myself why I had said such bizarre things. I knew the message was from God, but it all seemed so out of place. A week later I discovered the answer. The lady was out of the hospital and back at work. She reportedly had a smile on her face and said she had been healed. She was at work every week the rest of the year. Her life had been changed. I never knew who she had forgiven, or what
wrong had been done to her. But I knew Who had healed her and given her the power to forgive. In the Bible, Matthew 6 (verses 9-13) gives us the Lord’s Prayer followed by a very sobering promise: For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your father will not forgive you your sins. (verses 14-15, NIV) My story may not illustrate everyone’s situation. Everyone may not die this week if they don’t forgive those who have wronged them. But on the other hand, there are many ways to die. Is there someone in your past that you have not forgiven? Is there someone who betrayed a confidence or exposed your sin to others? Did someone go back on their word and break an agreement that cost you money and anguish? Did someone slander your good name? Did someone abuse you? There are a thousand ways to be wronged, but only one way to forgive. Our first response might be to say, “I cannot forgive that person, ever.” And in a sense you would be right. You, by yourself, cannot forgive anyone. That is part of the Fall. But 11
God, through you, can forgive anyone of anything. Forgiveness is not a self-help course. It is commanded by God and enabled by His Holy Spirit. You cannot do it alone. Don’t try to. Admit to God that you cannot forgive this person, but that you know He can. Ask Him to forgive that person through you. Will it make you healthy and happy, as with the lady I mentioned? Will you never be reminded of the sin against you? Maybe, maybe not. But it is sure to make you more like the kind of person the Lord wants you to be. And deep inside, isn’t that what we all really want?
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River Region’s Journey
Jo: Our faith in the Lord has played a HUGE part in surviving this thing called marriage. We would not have survived without the Lord’s sustaining grace! Marriage is hard work and requires communication, trust, unconditional love and denying self. Most of all, it requires being committed, being “all in” for the long haul…for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish…until death do us part. It is a covenant that we entered into with the Lord and “is not to be entered into lightly.” He is the third cord that holds it all together. I praise Him for holding us together through the tough times, because it just keeps getting better and better!
RRJ: Can you begin by sharing when you two first trusted in Christ for salvation and made Him Lord of your lives? Jo: I was 10 years old when I asked Jesus to come into my heart and be my Lord and Savior. I responded to an altar call at Forest Park Baptist Church and was baptized shortly thereafter. This was the beginning of a journey with the Lord, and there were times of back sliding and other times of great spiritual growth. I believe that we all go through seasons in our walk with the Lord, no matter what our age. Mike: I had heard about God and Jesus Christ throughout my young life, but I did not grow up in a church-going family, so I was never introduced to Jesus in a personal way, until I got married. At the age of 23, I responded to the invitation to accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior while attending a Fellowship of Christian Athletes conference. RRJ: You’ve been married for 33 years. How important of a role has your Christian faith played in sustaining your marriage? River Region’s Journey
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Mike: God has been the glue that has held our marriage together over the past 33 years. Like most people, I have had many ups and downs in my Christian walk. I have always had faith in God, but I just kept getting in the way, with the mind set that “I” can fix it myself. God has shown me over the years that He will take care of it all, if I will just move out of His way. RRJ: Over the past few years both of you have been through some incredible physical challenges. Can you tell us about those? Jo: Yes, wow, where do I start? For the past 4 ½ years, Mike suffered greatly from Lyme disease and the coinfections that come with it. This was an incredibly hard time in our lives because my robust “man’s man” became a shell of a man who was in constant pain, suffering from seizures, tremors, brain fog, fatigue, dizziness, extreme GI issues, severe weight loss due to swallowing difficulties, and the list goes on and on. Needless to say, over these past 4 ½ years, Mike was very depressed and even suicidal at times, due to this evil disease that was wreaking havoc on his body. Life for our family was just about surviving one day at a time. The burden of this disease that we tried to conquer in every human way possible was defeating us all. As for me, on September 15, 2014, I suffered a major cardiac event where my heart just stopped and refused to start back 12
beating. Medically speaking, there is no way I should still be alive. My ejection fraction rate when I got to the hospital was less than 5%, which is not conducive with life. The paramedics that worked on me said that they expected me to be DOA when I got to the hospital, but God had different plans. I somehow (all God) survived the night and was moved to UAB the next day where I was put on a “life saving” (ECMO) machine that allowed my heart to rest. From there, it was just a “wait and see” scenario for the next three days. On Thursday, my heart began to show a few blips on the heart monitor and I continued to improve. Three weeks later, I was able to come home, and 15 months later, I am able to do all the things that I did prior to this event! TO GOD BE THE GLORY, GREAT THINGS HE HAS DONE! RRJ: God healed you both and it’s given you a new outlook on life. How has personally experiencing his healing power changed the way you approach life and each other. Jo: Yes, both Mike and I have experienced healing in ways we could have never imagined! I know that my healing came from the Lord due to the countless prayers that were offered from thousands of people on my behalf. But during this storm, God was working in Mike and our children, and preparing our hearts for what he was going to do for Mike just 10 months later. So many “stood in the gap” for us during this difficult time and for that we are humbly grateful. As I recovered and returned to normal activities, Mike was continuing to decline in his health. After taking about a year off from pharmaceutical drugs and going a more holistic route, we began seeing a new doctor. Mike was to start back on intense antibiotics, but his stomach was so messed up that he was not able to start these as planned. He could not keep anything in his body and his weight plummeted to 164 lbs. He was dying right in front of my eyes, and I didn’t know what to do. A dear friend recognized this spirit of death and offered to come and pray for Mike. After four hours of intense prayer and deliverance, Mike was healed
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and set free from the torment and oppression that had been trying to “kill, steal, and destroy” him! What we have learned from our experiences is that, “…our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” (Ephesians 6:12). The reality of spiritual warfare has been an “up close and personal” experience for us. We have learned how to recognize the enemy and to “put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.” (Ephesians 6:13-18) We have also learned that each day is a gift from God, and as the return of Jesus draws closer each day, we want to share our stories of healing and deliverance. We want to offer hope to others who are going through their own storms of life. We want others to experience the true freedom and abundant life that is ours through the blood of Jesus. We are so excited to be vessels that our Lord can use for His glory! Mike: Since being healed and set free from spiritual bondage I (we) have become more aware of our surroundings and the people we come in contact with. Our eyes have been opened to the needs of others before ourselves. Both in our conversations and in the way that we look at things, God has made us more aware of what is of Him, and what is not. He has given us the tools to battle the spiritual warfare going on all around us. Being healed and set free has also drawn us closer, first and foremost to our awesome God, and to each other. The Lord has done such an amazing thing in our lives, that we just have to share with others! RRJ: What advice and resources would you suggest for newlyweds seeking a successful and lasting marriage? Jo: The most important thing is to let go of “self” and let God be the head of your marriage. Seek Him first and everything else will fall into place. Easy to say, but hard to do. When you fall short, and you will, just stop and turn back to Him. He has a most wonderful life already planned out for you. Get into His Word, so you will know how you are supposed to live this life. You are not always going to understand the things that happen in life, but trust Him! Because He knows what He is doing and He sees the big picture. Remember it is about HIS PURPOSE...not ours! “God will work all things together for good for those who love Him and who have been called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 Mike is the operations manager at Interscapes and Jo is the home manager. They have been married 33 years and have two adult children, Brantley and Carson. 13
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Becoming a Better You Have you ever felt disappointed with where you are in life? Have you ever come to the point where you were craving to do better in certain areas? If so, you are not alone. There is an inward drive to do better that we all share as human beings. This drive is due to God, our Intelligent Designer, who has perfection ingrained in our DNA. He’s wired us to grow from glory to glory, and sometimes, unbeknown to us, we march to that drumbeat striving to be like our Maker. We want to be better wives, better mothers, better sisters, better employers, better employees, and better Christians. We may be unsatisfied with our looks, jobs, or standing in society. While these may be truths we face, we cannot change everything. Yet there are plenty of aspects we can and some that we must change in order to improve ourselves. Here are seven steps to help with your quest for a better you.
1. Change what you can. To do better you must discover what you do not like about your present reality. Maybe you are easily offended and unforgiving, taking your frustration out on your children and spouse. Maybe you are a shopaholic and that causes trouble at home. Perhaps you generally are dissatisfied with your life and want something better. It is fine to want more out of life when we do so in a healthy manner. God wants us to advance from one level of glory to another in every area possible. Joel Osteen says that God did not create us to be average. We were created to excel. I agree! Don’t you? River Region’s Journey
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2. Vision Envision who you want to become and where you want to be in the future. Keep that vision constantly in focus, meditating on it until it develops into a craving and a passion. The Bible says that as a man thinks so is he. (See Proverbs 23:7) What you behold, you become.
3. Set goals. Most of what we get out of life is won through our efforts. We can be and experience God’s best if we engage His help and partner that with hard work. God has given us the ability to do much, and He desires that we utilize those abilities. See the vision, cast off bad habits, set some realistic goals, and work daily on succeeding at your dreams.
4. Develop community. “Iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Proverbs 27:17). This verse is God’s way of telling us that to do better we need a God-fearing friend whose advice, company, and accountability will help us achieve the desired results. Change happens best in groups.
5. Allow the process.
Most of the unflattering things about our character are seen through behaviors and traits that have been developed over time. It has taken years for them to develop to where they are today, so it will take time to undo our ingrained negative habits. And even more time to relearn new ones. For example, if you are in the habit of frowning every time you hear your name associated with something unpleasant, make a point to smile. It is not going to be easy at the beginning, and there will be times you 14
will fail at smiling in spite of the situation. What must we do when we fail? We need to remind ourselves that we alone are responsible for our emotional reactions, and no one else! When a smile shows up on our faces, even though we are screaming on the inside – that is victory. If we persist, our inward disposition will match up with our outward reality in time.
6. Ask God for help. Jacob of biblical fame desperately needed a total makeover. He had been a trickster, lying and cheating people all of his life. One day he came to a face-to-face confrontation with God through His angel. The angel asked him what his name was. Of course the angel really knew Jacob’s name, but the man needed to face himself. He was Jacob, which literally means trickster, liar, and cheater. With that realization he wrestled with the angel all night to have his nature changed. At the end, Jacob the trickster became Israel the prince of God. (See Gen. 32:22-32) We must have a realistic view of ourselves. Whatever character adjustments are needed, we need to ask the Lord through prayer to help us fix these issues. “The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.” (Maya Angelo)
7. Celebrate! Finally, celebrate your steps of victory by rewarding yourself with whatever brings joy to your heart, as an incentive to keep on doing better. And enjoy the better you!
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You’re engaged to be married!
The big day is approaching--with many details to plan--the venue, the flowers, cakes, and much more. However, after all the preparation for the big day, what happens after the wedding day? In a room of ten couples, 4-5 will end their marriage in divorce (American Psychological Association, Wikipedia). How can you prepare for happily ever after before the big day? After 34 years of marriage, my husband and I have learned a lot of tough lessons. Here are our top ten tips from the school of hard knocks:
Make smart choices before the wedding
Better yet, get pre-marital counseling or training before you get engaged. There are two possible successful outcomes to counseling--you start your marriage better prepared to go the distance or you don’t get engaged. Once you have announced you’re engaged, it’s very difficult to call it off. Studies show that couples who received premarital training have a 30% higher success rate in their marriage (Ready to Wed, by Dr. Gary Smalley). Counseling is a time to discover your expectations of each other, what you share in common and what could be problem areas, as well as personality traits.
Be sure you are equally yoked!
Picture two oxen held together with a heavy wooden yoke. One pulls to the left, while the other pulls to the right. Instead of pulling together, they are competing with each other. If one spouse is a Christian and the other is not, there will be some tough roads ahead. Christians are Christ-followers, which means we are constantly striving to be more like Jesus. The Bible becomes our moral code and the very foundation of our life. It’s hard for a non-Christian to understand this, much less live with Christian values and beliefs. If you are in this situation, you may want to call off the engagement until your loved one can attend church with you regularly, and hopefully, accept Christ as Lord and Savior.
Begin attending church and Sunday school together.
Roger and Cheryl Humber of Montgomery, share that her father required any young man wanting to date his daughter to attend church and Sunday school with the family. After more than 42 years of marriage, Cheryl and Roger grow stronger each year in their relationship with God and each other. Many churches teach God’s blueprint for marriage in Sunday school. In fact, that’s where my husband Mike and I first had the Scriptures opened to us, helping us make a positive turn in our marriage. In addition, Sunday school 17
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is an important way to be connected with a Christian community who will likely become your lifelong friends!
Pray together.
Inviting God into your relationship is like adding a third leg to a stool. It took 15 years for us to begin reading and discussing a short devotion together called “Moments with You” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey, followed by prayer. Today, praying together and for each other is a natural response to whatever life brings, drawing us closer to each other and to God. How wonderful it would be to start your marriage praying together!
Talk about your expectations of each other.
Maybe his mom always had a hot meal on the table at 6 pm. Chances are he is expecting the same. Your dad is a fix-it man. Do you expect your spouse to have the same skills? Where will you spend your first Thanksgiving and Christmas? Must you have turkey and dressing as your holiday dinner? You will get to know your spouse really well as the days and years roll by. In fact, you may realize that you really didn’t know each other very well when you got engaged. To help couples understand each other better, we teach a workshop on personality type (MBTI). For example, we know that my spouse is an extravert while I’m an introvert. He used to drag me to big parties, and before we even arrived, I would be hounding him to leave early. Maybe you’re super organized and he’s not. Despite our differences, we are God’s gift to each other. He uses those differences to smooth out our rough edges.
Don’t focus on small imperfections.
In my previous life as a nurse, I wore a white lab coat. If there was a spot of ink on my lab coat, it was all I saw in the mirror. Sometimes we treat our spouse like that. We focus on their flaws, rather than focusing on what he is doing well. Is he a good provider? A great problem solver? Try to look past his small imperfections and know that you’re not perfect either.
Build your spouse up with your words and actions.
Offer sincere compliments and praise what he does well. Ephesians 4:29 gives instruction: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” Also, read Dr. Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages, and discover what really makes your spouse feel loved. If
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your wife’s love language is “acts of service”, how hard is it to empty the dishwasher every morning? A gift can be as simple as a lovely flower. We naturally speak our own language, therefore we must train ourselves how to speak their language. As Dr. Chapman says, if you speak your spouse’s love language, “you won’t want another wife/husband, you’ll have another wife/husband!”
Continue to grow in your walk with the Lord.
Love your spouse as Christ loves us: unconditionally, selflessly, and sacrificially. John 13:34-35 says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” The world’s 50/50 plan doesn’t work, so we adopted the 100/0 plan. Serve and love your spouse 100%, even if you’re getting 0% in return.
Don’t let the word “divorce” be a part of your vocabulary.
The only time I ever “jokingly” mentioned divorce was the day Mike mentioned he might want to get a second masters degree! In Malachi 2:14-16 we learn what God thinks of divorce. ....The Lord is acting as a witness between you and the wife of your youth, because you have broken faith with her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant. Has not the Lord made them one? In flesh and spirit they are His....So guard yourself in your spirit and do not break faith with the wife of your youth. I hate divorce, says the Lord God of Israel....
God’s overriding goal for your marriage is not your happiness.
Dr. Gary Smalley, author of Ready to Wed, describes God’s plan for marriage. “God’s paramount goal for your upcoming marriage is not your mutual happiness. It really isn’t! That will surely come, if you cooperate with God’s real purpose for your marriage. But He wants so much more than mere happiness for you. He wants joy, significance, spiritual power and a compelling attractiveness that turns people’s heads. In other words, He wants to use your marriage to help you and others become more like His Son.” Invest some time in preparing for your life together. You will stand a much better chance of being one of the couples “who made it”... happily ever after, finishing strong. Lisa, along with husband Mike, are co-founders of CFM, an independent marriage and family education ministry committed to partnering with churches, organizations, and individuals in Montgomery and across Alabama to build Family Teams for Christ. Married for over 33 years, Mike and Lisa have three daughters, two sons-in-law, and three grandchildren.
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the Year and I can’t wait to see this in the weddings of 2016. These two colors scream sweetness to me. Together they remind us of blushing brides. No doubt about it, 2016 will be a return to the classic elegance in weddings. With less trendy and loud statement fads, you’ll see timeless sophistications in design, wardrobe, and setting. Remember, classic and timeless doesn’t mean impersonal. There are plenty of ways to make each wedding distinct, and personal, which is why I adore the second trend I want to share with you!
I simply adore weddings! Every year as I sit down to think about the wedding trends for the year ahead, I cannot believe it’s my job to partner with brides and help them plan their special day. It is just one day, but it’s so much more too! A wedding day is the culmination of months of planning, where all the elements you’ve dreamed about come together. Suddenly, after lots of lists, and hours of conversations about flowers and dresses and invitations and food, the whole world stops. The bride walks down the aisle to a groom overwhelmed with emotion. It’s my favorite scene every single time. As we look at the trends for 2016, I am thrilled to begin to imagine what weddings this year will look like! Here are a few snapshots of what to expect:
Custom Monograms Monograms are not new to weddings, but what we see growing in 2016 is a greater appreciation for custom monograms and logos specifically designed for each couple, and being carried throughout the wedding. As a true southern girl, I love a good monogram just about any time of year, for nearly anything, but the blend of custom monograms offers each wedding a uniqueness while still echoing sophistication and classic elegance. I’m looking forward to working with designers to create this personal stamp for my brides to carry through all aspects of their wedding – from save-the-dates to websites and invitations to place cards at the reception.
Two Colors of the Year! First, and most exciting to me, is Pantone’s announcement of not one, but TWO colors of the year: Rose Quartz and Serenity. For the first time, Pantone has chosen to blend two colors for their Color of River Region’s Journey
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Speaking of the reception. Let’s talk about seating, because there’s another trend for 2016 that is really going to shape wedding festivities:
Take a Seat We’re seeing fewer reception layouts based on large round tables sprawled across a ballroom. More and more, couples are creating a more familiar feel for their reception by mixing long, rectangular tables with smaller square tables. This patchwork of guest seating provides a more intimate setting while adding to the festive spirit of a wedding reception. You can still expect to find lounge areas sprinkled throughout a reception venue. These comfortable, casual seating areas are perfect for the classic cocktail hour, building energy ahead of the reception and dancing. And who doesn’t love taking a breather after hours of dancing?! In 2016, wedding photographers are sure to capture classic candid photos of wedding guests kicking off their heels and relaxing into one of the lounge areas. Here’s what else you’ll see from photographers in 2016:
Story Photos More and more, couples are asking for photos that tell the story of their wedding. The doors opening to reveal the bride, waiting to walk down the aisle. Tears of joy streaming down the mother of the bride’s face. An aerial shot of the dance floor. Images like these capture the magic of your wedding day. After months of planning every detail, the day can become of blur of activity, endless smiles to be sure, but non-stop motion. Epic action photos give you the chance to treasure these special moments for life. Along the same lines, for couples hoping to have a video of their wedding, we’re seeing a trend towards quick-turn highlight films provided by videographers. These shorter snippets are perfect for sharing with family and friends, especially online. Even more fun, the shorter video makes it easier to find the exact moment you want to replay over and over again… like the moment the bride smeared cake all over the groom. While it may not be elegant, the cake smash is definitely classic – and the 2016 classic elegance theme extends to wedding cakes too: 21
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Buttercream is Back After several years of fondant favorites, traditional buttercream cakes are on trend for 2016. Brides appreciate the more organic finish of buttercream, and these cakes are favorites among guests of all ages. (Not to mention, buttercream smears so much better when the bride and groom feed each other their first piece of cake!) And, expect to see the wedding cake continue many of the other elements of the wedding, especially color and texture. With two Pantone colors of the year, this last trend for 2016 is hardly a surprise:
Outstanding Ombré I can hardly wait to see this trend develop this year. I’m already picturing color concentration, tone-on-tone explosion, especially in flowers. Centerpieces with
three to five different flowers in the same shade, the slight variations between flowers create an ombré effect. I especially love that brides can use this ombré trend to create texture in other areas of the wedding too – from designing the monogram to offering bridesmaids options for their dresses, choosing two to three hues of the same color. Isn’t it fun to imagine the weddings we’ll see in 2016? There are so many resources these days for brides to find inspiration. From Pinterest to Etsy to Instagram, there are thousands of ideas. But each and every wedding is as unique as the two people preparing to say, “I do.” Even as you plan each detail, the whole picture will become a reflection of the bride and groom. The wedding is the first special
day in the thousands of special days that will make up your marriage. So I always remind my brides that the most important element of your wedding is beginning this adventure of marriage with the right partner, built on a solid foundation of faith. After that, every detail is icing on the cake! Mary Sanders is owner of Mary Me Brides. She has been in business for 10 years and has served many brides across the River Region. Mary is wife to Adam of 12 years and mom to her three children: Ross (10), Mary Townsend (9), Drew (5), and their new addition, Glory (a silver Lab). **Photos: Tony Chavez (bridesmaid/groomsman and table setting; CWF Photography (cake)
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January God's Provisions 2016_Layout 1 12/18/15 12:39 PM Page 1
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Faith Radio Helps Listeners Grow By: • Broadcasting more than 2000 hours of Bible teaching each year. “Listening to the great teachers on Faith Radio has been a huge help to my spiritual growth.”
• Equipping area jails and prisons with “Radios of Faith”
“I take every opportunity to speak with my cell mates about the Lord. It seems most of the guys are less violent and more civil when Faith Radio is on.”
• Re-Investing in our English broadcast in Cap-Haitien, Haiti “There are many Haitians really keen to learn English. As they tune in to Faith Radio, not only do they get to improve their English as they listen, but they hear eternal truth and hope in the message of the Gospel.” • Helping hundreds of ministries/churches promote their events • Ministering in Baptist Health hospital rooms “A lot of healing has taken place in my life since listening to Faith Radio.”
• Comforting many lonely and hurting people day and night “...for the songs you all play through the night. They fill my bedroom with the presence of God.”
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Contact us at www.faithradio.org, call 800-239-8900 or 23 by mail at P.O. Box 210789 Montgomery, AL 36121-0789.
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Adrienne, how long have you and Webb been married? What are your fondest memories of your wedding and the days leading up to it? We were married on March 14, 2015 at Saint James United Methodist Church with Pastor Allen Newton officiating. The memories from that day are vast, but I think Webb and myself have a few that truly stand out. In the days leading up to the wedding there was such an outpouring of love and support from both families. They surrounded us, making sure that the big day was as relaxed as possible. My most fond memory would be choosing to have a first look with my father. This moment is one that will always stand still...between me and my father, both
mothers, and the bridesmaids in the room. That memory will always hold an incredibly special place in my heart. Webb’s fondest memory is of his late grandmother, Ann. When looking back at photographs and the video you can tell she had an amazing time that evening. She had a chance to dance with her grandchildren, and truly enjoy herself. Many couples spend the majority of their engagement months planning only for the “wedding” rather than planning for their “marriage”. How did the two of you prepare for marriage so that it could start off on the right foot and grow even richer with time? We like to say that we started preparing for marriage long before we became engaged. During the time that we dated, most of our relationship was spent a long distance apart. During that time we began participating in couples devotionals, and praying together; this is when we built the foundation of our relationship on Christ. We were also blessed with a small group from our church that focused on newlyweds and those who were about to get married. We would meet once a week and go over a devotional and talk about trials and tribulations that new couples face. This really opened our eyes to the fact that you need God as your foundation to make a marriage
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strong enough to weather everything that it will face. Then in the weeks leading up to the big day we met with Allen, our pastor, which was also extremely helpful and encouraging. As you seek to honor Christ above all else, how would you say that focus helps you have a thriving marriage and a right attitude toward your new spouse? We realize that God sent his one and only Son to die for our sins so that we could be with Him one day. It was that grace that we received from Him that should be the leading example that we follow. We must recognize that we will never be perfect. If you are not perfect then you cannot expect your spouse to be perfect. You have to show love and forgiveness and always be willing to put your spouse’s needs before your own wants and needs. We believe that if we do this, and have God as the bedrock we base our lives upon, then our marriage will thrive through any situation we come upon on the journey. In the end, you have to remember that God is with you no matter what. Webb’s favorite saying is: “You can go down whichever path in life that you want to travel, but in the end you will always end up on the path that God wants you on. It is just a matter of do you want to travel the hard way or the easy way?”
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What advice would you give engaged or newly married couples to help them prepare for marriage and to help them grow in oneness after their big day? One of the best pieces of advice that we could give is don’t sweat the small stuff and communicate with each other. It is incredibly easy to get wrapped up in the minute details of our day to day lives and forget to look at the big picture. We tend to forget that there are major issues in today’s world, and we focus on the petty things. Communication is also key. When we get wrapped up in the little things we forget to really take time to talk about what’s going on. It may seem easy to sweep little issues under the rug, but eventually those little issues will pile up, and become something much larger. We take the time to address issues that we are having, no matter how small. When we do this it allows us to keep Christ at the center of our marriage.
Healthcare as amazing as their potential
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January 2016
River Region’s Journey
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Adoption
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy and First UMC, Millbrook APAC- Alabama Pre/Post Adoption Connection Support Group This group provides education and social interaction for adoptive families. Montgomery Group meets 3rd Thursdays, 6-7:30 p.m., Room 8114 at Frazer. For information, call Monica Russell at 409-9477 or email mrussell@childrensaid.org. Autauga/Elmore Group meets 4th Tuesdays, 6-7:30 p.m., First UMC, Millbrook. Childcare, children’s group and dinner provided. For info, call Hannah Taylor at 409-9477 or e-mail htaylor@childrensaid.org. Location: Landmark Church, 1800 Halcyon Blvd. Leaders: Chad & Betsy Emerson (334) 201-5241 Wednesday, 6:30pm in Rm. 116. The Orphan Care Group will focus on God’s call to help orphans through adoption, foster care, and missions work. The group will share experiences, study and Biblical themes regarding orphan care, and provide a support and network for individuals who want to support orphans. Location: Millbrook First United Methodist Church, 3350 Edgewood Road Adoption Support- Will meet 4th Tuesday of each month from 6-7:30 p.m.
Alcoholic / Addict
Location: Caring Center of FBC, 52 Adams Avenue CrossRoads Support Group is for addicts/alcoholics and family members. Meets at 6 p.m. Tuesdays and follows a Christ-centered 12-step program. Call 264-4949.
days at 5:30pm (meal-CrossTalk Cafe), 6-6:55 pm (large group), 6:55-7:45 (small group). Childcare available. Call Larry at 334-832-5714 or visit myjourneychurch.com.
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy An Alzheimer’s and Dementia Caregivers’ Support Group meets on the first Thursday of each month at 11 a.m. in Room 3103. Call 272.8622.
Location: Landmark Church, 1800 Halcyon Blvd. RSVPThis is a 12 step spiritual recovery program for overcoming addictions. Using the steps and Bible we help build self-esteem, responsible behavior, the making of amends for our destructive actions, and to fill the void in our hearts in a loving relationship with God. Wednesday @ 6:30pm in Rm. 121 of the Life Center.
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy A Dementia Daycare is held each Thursday in Rm. 3101 from 9:30 a.m. to 12 p.m. Each participant may bring a sack lunch. There is no charge. REGISTRATION IS REQUIRED. Call the LifeCare office at 272-8622.
Location: Prattville Church of Christ, 344 East Main St. RSVP - 12 step (Christians Against Substance Abuse-CASA) spiritual recovery program, for overcoming addictions. Class begins each Wednesday evening @6:30 PM. Please call 334365-4201 for addition information. Location: Santuck Baptist Church, 7250 Central Plank Rd. (Hwy 9), Wetumpka. Celebrate Recovery meets each Thursday evening at 6:15 in the Fellowship Hall. This is a Chrsit centered 12 step-program for anyone struggling with hurts, habits, and hang-ups. Call 567-2364. Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) is open to all struggling with addictive sexual behavior. If you believe you have a problem with sex addiction (or are wondering if you might) and you want to change your behavior, we recommend you visit our group. For locations, please visit- https://saa-recovery.org/ or please contact – MontgomerySAA@outlook.com. Meetings are held: every Sunday night - 7:45 p.m, men only. Every Monday night - 7:30 p.m, men and women. Location: St. James UMC, 9045 Vaughn Road Celebrate Recovery meets every Thursday night from 6-8 pm in the Youth Room. This is a Christ-centered 12-step group for anyone struggling with an “addiction or lifechallenging issues.” For information, call Chris Henderson at 334-215-0427.
Location: Dalraida UMC, 3817 Atlanta Highway Alcoholics Anonymous meets at 6 p.m. on Tuesdays. 272.2190. Alanon meets at 7:30 p.m. on Wednesdays.
Location: Trinity Episcopal, Wetumpka (Across from Winn Dixie on HWY 231) Gamblers Anonymous-Saturdays at 7 p.m.
Location: First Baptist Church (Huff Community Ministries Bldg., 200 S. Perry Street) Celebrate Recovery, a Bible-based Christ centered approach to recovery from hurts, habits and hang-ups, meets Friday nights, from 5:30 p.m.- 8 p.m. For more information, contact Jane Ferguson at 241.5141.
Location: Vaughn Forest Church, 8660 Vaughn Road Celebrate Recovery is a 12-step-Christian process to help you cope with hurts, hang-ups, and habits on a weekly basis. Led by Jeff McFarland on Wednesdays from 6-8 pm. Call 279-5433 for more info.
Location: Grace @ Bell Road, Corner of Bell Road and Atlanta Hwy. Alcoholics Anonymous and Alanon meetings are held Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday, at 6 p.m. An Open AA Speaker meeting is held on Saturday at 6 p.m. An Alanon & AA held on Sundays at 2 p.m. Location: Grace Point Community Church, 78223 Tallassee Hwy (Hwy 14), Wetumpka Celebrate Recovery- every Tuesday night- 6:15pm. All are welcome! These meetings are a safe and loving environment for individuals seeking to conquer their hurts, habits and hang-ups! gracepoint.info. Location: Journey Church, 2960 East Cobbs Ford Road across from The Catfish House in Millbrook Celebrate Recovery - Christ-centered 12-step for anyone struggling with addiction or life-challenging issues. Mon-
River Region’s Journey
January 2016
Location: First United Methodist Church, Wetumpka 306 W. Tuskeena Street ‘Fresh Start’ Recovery meets every Thursday, 6-8pm (meal included). In 2011, Fresh Start Motorcycle Ministry (FSMM) began when God laid it on the heart of a lifetime biker to minister to those with his background. All are welcome, not a requirement to own/ride a motorcycle. Format used is the Holy Bible. For any info contact ministry leader, Paul Henderson, 334-201-5428.
Alzheimer’s / Dementia
Location: First UMC, 2416 W. Cloverdale Park, Wesley Hall Bldg. An Adult Parkinson/Alzheimer’s respite ministry meets from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. every Monday, Wednesday and Thursday. Lunch is served. Contact Daphne at 834-8990.
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Location: Memorial Presbyterian, 2130 Bell Road A Dementia Morning Out for caregivers is offered each Tuesday from 8:45-noon. There is no charge. Each participant may bring a sack lunch (juice provided). Registration is required by calling 274-1018.
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Cancer
Location: Aldersgate UMC, 6610 Vaughn Rd, Montgomery Cancer Survivors Support Group is sponsored by Samaritan Counseling Center. We would love to have anyone (patient or family member ) join us. Thursdays at 1 pm. Please call before attending just to make sure we are meeting that week. Please call Debbie D at 467-4578 or Ben W at 202-1912. Location: Dalraida Baptist, 3838 Wares Ferry Road. Just for Men -- Faith based cancer support group for men. Meetings are held the second Tuesday of each month at 6 p.m. in the conference center. Please call 272-2412 email stan.hurst@knology.net. Location: ChristChurch, 8800 Vaughn Road Cancer Support Group for general cancer. Tuesday afternoons at 1 pm. For more info, please call Christy Holding at 531-1390 or Debbie at 467-4578. Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy. Women of Hope Breast Cancer Support Group, providing education, awareness, and mentoring for breast cancer patients/survivors, family, and friends, meets the 2nd Tuesday of each month at 5:30 p.m. in Rm 8253. Call 272-8622 or womenofhope@charter.net. Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy. The Central Alabama Multiple Myeloma Support Group meets from 10 a.m. to noon the second Saturday of every month in Room 3105. We have guest speakers, video presentations, printed information and a group that welcomes sharing their journey with myeloma in an informal setting. Refreshments are provided.. Contact Lorenzo and Elaine Duncan at 334-281-8158, or at duncan6563@gmail.com.
Depression
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy A Depression/Bipolar Support Group meets on the 1st Thursday of each month from 7:00-8:30pm in Room 3101. This group also meets on the 3rd Saturday afternoon, 12-2 pm, Dalraida UMC, 3817 Atlanta Hwy in Church Annex. Call 334.652.1431 or email dbsamontgomery@yahoo.com.
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Divorce
Gamblers Anonymous Hotline: 334-541-5420 or you can call 2-1-1 and ask for meeting information.
Location: First Baptist Church, 305 S. Perry Street Divorce Care is held Wednesdays, 6:30-8 pm. Childcare available. $15 for workbook. Dinner at 4:45 ($5 adults, $3 kids). Call Kathy Cooper at 241-5125.
Alabama Council on Compulsive Gambling: 277-5100
Grief Location: Eastmont Baptist,
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Divorce Care meets each Tuesday from 6-7:30pm. in the Fellowship Hall Lobby. This group will provide support & guidance to assist you in working through the issues, pain & pressures surrounding divorce. Also, Divorce Care for Kids meets each Tuesday from 6-7:30pm. For information, contact 495-6385 or email singles@frazerumc.org.
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Location: Millbrook First UMC, 3350 Edgewood Road DivorceCare- Will meet Sundays from 5-7 p.m. For more information or to sign up, please call the church office at 285-4114 or email churchoffice@mfumc.org.
Location: First UMC, 100 E. Fourth St, Prattville Grief Share, Tuesday evenings at 6:30 pm in the church parlor. Call 365-5977.
Location: Vaughn Forest Church, 8660 Vaughn Road DivorceCare fosters a weekly supportive and caring environment to heal the hurt of separation and divorce. Facilitators are Todd Smith, Wendy Timbie, and Becki Harrison. Call 279-5433.
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4505 Atlanta Hwy. Compassionate Friends is a national self-help support organization for families grieving the death of a child meeting first Tuesdays at 7 pm. Call (334) 284-2721 for info.
Gambling
Location: Cedarwood Community Church, 10286 US HWY 231 in the Wallsboro/ Wetumpka community Gamblers Anonymous, Saturdays at 6 pm. 567-0476 Location: Mental Health of America Bldg, 1116 South Hull Street, Montgomery. Sundays @ 5 pm.
Location: Frazer UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Grief Recovery Support Group meets Tuesdays at 5:30 p.m., Rm 3105, in Fellowship Hall Lobby. 272.8622. Location: Grace Baptist Church, 304 Old Montgomery Highway, Wetumpka Mourning to Morning is a Christian growth group for mothers who have lost a child, from before birth through adulthood. Meets the last Thursday night of each month. For info, contact Alice Scarborough (334) 462-4775 or Gwen Ellis (334) 567-8754 or e-mail mourningtomorning@gmail. com. Join us on Facebook--Mourning to Morning Group. Location: Millbrook FUMC, 3350 Edgewood Rd Grief Share meets Sundays from 5-7 p.m. For more information or to sign up, please call the church office at 285-4114 or email churchoffice@mfumc.org. Location: Pilgrim Rest Missionary Baptist Church 1550 E. Washington Street Grief Ministry is a grief recovery support group that meets
Location: St Paul’s Lutheran Church, 4475 Atlanta Hwy, Mondays @ 6pm.
every Monday at 6:00 P.M. The ministry is designed to help anyone through the hurt of losing a loved one by successfully traveling the journey from mourning to joy. Alicia Glover is the coordinator. For information contact Glover at 334-281-2754. Location: Vaughn Forest Church, 8660 Vaughn Road GriefShare is a support group that meets Wednesdays from 6-8 pm. This program is non-denominational and features biblical concepts for healing your grief. GriefShare will be led by Howard and Carol Payne and Jim Williams. Call 2795433 for more information.
Miscellaneous Location: 5500 Ash Grove Circle, Montgomery. OCD Support Group (obsessive- Compulsive Disorder) Long showers, multiple hand washing, rituals, checking stove, hoarding and symmetry. This support group is open to anyone who has struggled with OCD. You’re not alone anymore. Call Donald: 220-7555. Location: Eastmont Baptist Church, 4505 Atlanta Highway Take Heart is for women dealing with infertility and/or miscarriage. The group meets the first Monday of each month at 6 pm in room 116. Contact Melissa at (205) 9132667 for more information.
Parenting
Location: First Baptist Prattville, 138 S. Washington Moms LIFE (Living In Faith Everyday) meets twice monthly from 8:30 - 11:45 am in the chapel at the Church from Aug May. We offer a time of fellowship, Bible study, musical guest, special guest speakers and a lot of fun!! Cost is $5 per meeting. For moms of all
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Ministering to Suicidal Desperation Ministering to Suicidal Desperation
Soul ShopTM Trains Church Leaders to Save Lives In an effort to stem the rising tide of suicide in the River Region, The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. is bringing Soul ShopTM to our community. Soul ShopTM is a suicide prevention and recovery training and includes a daylong training session specifically designed to train church leaders, clergy, program staff, lay ministers, office staff, and faith-based therapists to detect the signs of someone contemplating suicide and possibly save their life. Additionally, Soul ShopTM trains Church leaders how to minister to surviving family members after a suicide.
Sponsored by
First United Methodist Church-Montgomery Prattville First United Methodist Church Grace Pointe Church of Christ St. John’s Episcopal Church
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To learn more about Soul Shop TM coming to Montgomery, please contact
The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. 2011 Zelda Road Montgomery, AL 36106 334-262-7787 # 202 cholding@tsccenter.org
Workshop Dates and Times February 1, 2016 6:30 -8:00 pm Open to the public
February 2, 8:00 a.m. – 4:00 p.m. : Specifically for Clergy, Church Staff, Lay Ministers and other Faith Related Organizations
Location
First United Methodist Church 2416 West Cloverdale Park Montgomery, Alabama, 36106
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January 2016
River Region’s Journey
stages and ages of life. Childcare provided by reservation. For more info and to reserve your spot, call April Scott at 828-446-6666. Location: First Baptist Church, 305 S. Perry Street MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) Moms, need a little break? MOPS is a place you can share a good meal, make new friends, and find encouragement as you face the everyday challenges of raising your little ones. We have educational speakers, great conversation, and fun activities. Free childcare is provided. Meetings are every 2nd and 4th Tuesdays, 9:30-11:30 a.m., September through May. Contact Tiffany Alewine at 241-5165. Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Frazer mom2mom is a playgroup to connect mothers of ages birth to 5 at Frazer United Methodist Church to share fun and inspiration in our journey together, with our children, and with Christ. Email Mom2mom@frazerumc.org for more information.
together by a common bond, to be better wives, moms, and friends along this journey in the trenches of motherhood. We meet the 1st and 3rd Tuesday of each month from 9:30—11:30 a.m. Childcare is provided. For info e-mail VFCMOPS@gmail.com.
Physical Challenges
Location: Aldersgate UMC, 6610 Vaughn Road Visually Impaired Support Group – Meets monthly on second Thursday 1:00 – 2:30 p.m. The group is called Outward Sight - Inward Vision and is for those with vision loss and their caregivers. Our mission is to assist those experiencing vision loss to maintain their independence by providing access to valuable information and spiritual support. Call 272-6152.
Location: Perry Hill UMC, 910 Perry Hill Road Single Moms’ Care and Support Group meets 2nd and 4th Thursdays from 6:15 - 8:00 PM. December meeting will be on the 11th. Free snack supper provided to moms and children. Child care for infants -16 years. Call 272-3174 for information.
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy An MDA/ALS Support Group will meet Tuesday August 10 6:00p.m. – 8:00 p.m. in room 3101. Anyone affected by a neuromuscular disease or family members of those affected. To receive information, call 396-4534.
Location: Redland Baptist, 1266 Dozier Rd, Wetumpka A MOPS group will be held 1st and 3rd Tuesday’s of every month during the school year, and has scheduled play dates and moms nights out through the summer and beyond. While moms are in a MOPS meeting, their children are lovingly cared for in the MOPPETS program. Email Denise Braswell at deniseorscott@yahoo.com for more info.
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy The Montgomery Ostomy Support Group is for people who have had or will have urinary or intestinal diversion surgeries such as colostomy, ileostomy and urostomy. Family members are welcome to attend. Meetings are held every other month generally on a Sunday afternoon. For more information, call Paul at 271-3563 or visit www.montgomeryostomy.info.
Location: Vaughn Forest Church, 8660 Vaughn Road Are you in need of a time-out? MOPS joins mothers
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy A Parkinson’s Support Group will meet the 4th Thursday
at 6 p.m., in room 8114 at Frazer UMC. This group is for those who have Parkinson’s disease and the family members. 272-8622.
Singlehood
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Boundaries study for singles meets each Tuesday from 6-7:30pm in the Fellowship Hall Lobby. This study will help singles learn to set boundaries with emotions and help avoid the harmful behavior of others. For more information, call 495-6386 or email singles@frazerumc.org. Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Single and Parenting! A New Group for Single Mom’s. This group meets every Tuesday from 6-7:30pm for hope & encouragement & guidance & parenting ideas. For information, call 495-6386 or email singles@frazerumc.org. Location: Cornerstone Christian, 301 Dalraida Rd. Unavoidably Single Again (USA) Fellowship, a support group for widows and widowers. Informal meetings for fellowship and fun are held on the third Saturday of each month starting at 10 AM. Contact Lynda at farauthor@aol. com or 354-8869.
Veterans
Location: Frazer Memorial UMC, 6000 Atlanta Hwy Veterans OEF/OIF Caregivers Support Group meets on the 3rd Wednesday from 11am-1pm in Room 3108. Contact LaQuana Edwards, Caregiver Support Coordinator at CAVHCS (334) 727-0550 ext. 5350.
Email your support group info to deanne@readjourneymagazine.com!
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“Do Not Harm Yourself, For We Are All Here!” Acts 16:28 In Acts, after a violent earthquake, the chains on Paul and Silas fell off and the prison doors were opened. Paul and Silas could have escaped, but remained in prison. One result indicated by the verse above was that by remaining present, Paul kept the prison guard from taking his own life. At the time of the Roman Empire, if a prisoner escaped, it was customary to take the life of the guard held responsible. The guard believed that taking his own life would shorten his shame, suffering and distress. And so it continues today. Those with suicidal desperation believe that by taking their own life, they will reduce their shame, suffering and distress. Note that although Paul could have escaped the prison, he deliberately remained and encouraged the guard to not take his life. The guard was then “filled with joy” and he and his whole household became believers and rejoiced. With Paul’s encouragement, an entire family was saved. Everyday, people in our community need to hear the words that Paul spoke to his Philippian guard. “Do not harm yourself, for we are all here!” Preventing suicide represents a unique opportunity for Christians to share hope and social connection that are so critical to life. If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and
sympathy, make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 2:1-5, NRSV) In the March 2015 edition of this column, I wrote about responding to suicidal thoughts in Christians. Since that time, suicides continue to devastate our congregations and community leaving the survivors of those who have completed suicides shattered, confused, questioning and wondering what could have been done to change the outcome. The statistics are staggering. A recent article by Hanna Rosin, “The Silicon Valley Suicides” in the December 2015 issue of The Atlantic reviews the research by Suniya Luthar detailing the vulnerabilities of affluent students and recent suicide clusters. Luthar found that when self-worth is tied to meeting only the highest standards of success, the shame that is experienced when expectations are not met can seem unbearable. Unfortunately, children, adolescents, college students and adults who superficially appear to be successful, happy, and well-adjusted are experiencing suicidal desperation without those closest to them being aware. Anyone can begin thinking about suicide given an accumulation of losses, setbacks, failures, loss of stature, or shame. Our perfectionistic and shame ridden culture leaves little room for differences or learning from mistakes. Our faith communities are called on to respond to suicide too frequently after tragedy occurs. Perhaps we can help those who are struggling before tragedy. What if we were better equipped to support those who have survived the loss of loved ones, coworkers and friends? The Samaritan Counseling Center, the publishers of this magazine, supporting 31
congregations, hospitals, businesses and sponsors will present Soul Shop, training for the faith community to effectively minister to suicidal desperation and save lives February 1-2. This unique opportunity will empower our faith communities to prevent suicides. The training will be held at First United Methodist Church Montgomery. Russ Crabtree, a national speaker on the role of faith communities in preventing suicide, has trained thousands of people and will be leading this unique opportunity for the River Region. Don’t miss this this important training. Monday night, February 1 at 6 pm is open to everyone in the community, teachers, health care workers, parents, businesses, first responders, administrators, and others who want to begin the discussion on how to prevent suicide. Tuesday, February 2, requires registration and is training for clergy, lay ministers, Church staff, faith affiliated school personnel, and counselors to learn specific skills to intervene. Pastoral education units are available. As it is, there are many parts, but one body.… But God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. (1 Corinthians 12:20, 24-26, NIV) Please share this unique opportunity with others. For more information, call The Samaritan Counseling Center at 262-7787. Nancy W. Thomas, M.A., N.C.C., C.C.M.H.C., L.P.C. Nancy Thomas is the Executive Director of Clinical Services at The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. in Montgomery. She is a National Certified Counselor, Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Licensed Professional Counselor. She graduated from the University of Alabama with an M.A. in Counselor Education in 1994. She has extensive training and experience in mental health and marriage and family therapy. Her professional interests are in mental health recovery, adolescent and college issues, life transitions, healthy relationships, marital counseling, parenting, spirituality and identity development, and preserving marriages and families. Nancy works primarily with adolescents and adults.
January 2016
River Region’s Journey
Hungry? This is the beginning of a new year, and by the time you have acquired a copy of this magazine and come across this column, you may have already made and broken your New Year’s resolutions. I certainly hope not, but a Forbes story from 2013 indicated that some 40% of Americans make such resolutions, but only 8% keep them, according to research from the University of Scranton cited in the article. So, what’s the leading resolution? Nielsen offers some insight – last year, it reported that “staying fit and healthy” is our top resolution, coming in at 37%, followed closely by “lose weight” (32%). Something is disconnected! We are seeing people in rather notable quantities abandon opportunities to stay in shape. Gallup reports that the national obesity rate continued to rise in 2014 to 27.7%, up from 27.1% in 2013 and significantly higher than the 25.5% recorded in 2008. Since 2013, four states - Nevada, New Mexico, Minnesota, and, yes, Alabama - have had statistically significant increases in obesity. Only one – Tennessee – had a significant decline. If you’re looking for a definition of obesity, here’s one from Gallup: Americans who have a body mass index of 30 or higher are classified as obese. I believe there is undoubtedly a spiritual problem present, as well. After a column in Journey addressed the topic of adultery a few months ago, a reader e-mailed me asking me to address the sin of…gluttony. Here at the beginning of 2016, I thought it would be highly appropriate to do so. I would submit that obesity can be the result of gluttony, but as John Piper, in the Desiring God blog, points out: “Oftentimes obesity issues are connected as much to activity issues as they are to what goes into our mouths. Muscles are designed to burn food, but if they aren’t being used then any amount of food is going to result in obesity.” River Region’s Journey
January 2016
Gluttony is certainly a sin area, because it involves placing the desire for food above the desire for God, which is idolatry. Piper states: “Gluttony is having a craving for food that conquers you.” He says that, “A lot of gluttony is born of boredom. Life is not satisfying or stimulating, relationships feel empty, and work is boring, but food is always there and tastes so good.” He challenges readers to “cultivate a range of appetites for great and good things, things like good literature, people’s fellowship, reading the Bible, nature, work, etc. Discover these other appetites so that things other than food can satisfy you. Then pray earnestly and cultivate and nurture these satisfactions.” The CNN Belief Blog reported on a 2013 survey, called, “Temptations and America’s Favorite Sins,” conducted by the Barna Group, which showed 60% of Americans admitted that they’re tempted to worry too much or procrastinate; 55% said they’re tempted to overeat, and 41% said they’re tempted by sloth, or laziness. Those are the top 3 areas! Todd Hunter, author of the book, Our Favorite Sins, which was used in correlation with the survey, experienced the extension of improper desires for food in his life, according to the CNN story. He once shot up to 330 pounds because he overate. He said all temptations start with a desire for something good: tasty food, rest, intimacy. They become “disordered” when they enslave people and spread pain through their lives. He wrote in the book, “Disordered desires imprison us.” He added, “In the end they give us nothing – not one lasting shred of goodness, freedom, joy, or love.” 32
Hunter’s advice for staying clear of temptation: fasting, praying and staying out of places and relationships that lead you toward temptation. Our alarming rates of obesity indicate, I believe, that there are two major problem areas at play: overabundance of food consumption and lack of activity. You may not be obese, but if you yield to the temptation to overeat, you allow the desire for food to override the controlling power of the Holy Spirit. Whatever we overindulge in indicates what we have not submitted to the control of the presence of Jesus in our hearts. At the beginning of the New Year, we can be challenged to identify areas in which we have not surrendered control to God and recognize that He will give us the power to overcome temptation. In 1st Corinthians 10:13, He promises a way of escape. Piper writes:
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I think we need to recover a large appreciation for the biblical disciplines of self-denial and fasting. That is the discipline side of this issue: “I will not be enslaved by anything,” “I pommel myself,” and “I take up my cross daily.” I think we should esteem, extol, and cherish the biblical teaching that the Christian life is one of confronting our cravings and saying no to them. Bob Crittenden is host of “The Meeting House”, heard weekday afternoons from 4-6pm on Faith Radio, 89.1FM in Montgomery. Described as “the intersection of faith and culture”, the program features Christian music and conversation about a variety of topics. Learn more by visiting www. meetinghouseonline.info.
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January 2016
River Region’s Journey
January 2016 Community Calendar Monthly events can also be found in the Around Our Community Section starting on page 8. January 9 Hope Inspired Ministries Extra Mile. Registration opens at 7 a.m. and races begin at 8 a.m. HIM teaches students to go the extra mile in all that they do and wants runners to go the extra mile as well! Runners will have the option to participate in the 5K or 10K, with each group going an “extra mile” to complete the race. The Extra Mile will be an event for runners and will also be a time of fun for the entire family with food from local restaurants, face painting, music, entertainment for the kids and more. Registration fees range from $20 to $35. Runners can register online or e-mail leannejordan7@gmail.com or call (334) 318-5864. More info available on Facebook.
January 15-16 Kelly Minter will be at Eastern Hills Baptist Church, 3604 Pleasant Ridge Road, in Montgomery. Call 272.0604 for more information. Visit www.ehbconline.com.
January 16 Breaking Free From an Unhealthy Lifestyle Women’s Symposium. Hosted by Landmark Church, in the Life Center, from 9 am to 3 pm Call Terry Dees, (334) 233-0646 or Aleah Goode (334) 221-5340 to register or visit 1140balance.com/lifeunchained. The Cancer Wellness Foundation is pleased to announce “The Journey Continues...Tim Tebow” at the Montgomery Performing Arts Center. Call MPAC 334-481-5100 or www. mpaconline.org. The following seats do not include VIP Passes:Balcony $60 Loge $89; Mezzanine $117 Orchestra $174. River Region’s Journey
January 2016
January 22-23 Dream Women’s Conference featuring: awardwinning curriculum developer, best selling books author, and co-founder of Messenger International Lisa Bevere, and world renowned Christian musician, Christy Nockles! This event is going to sell out fast so register NOW online or in our church lobby, Saint James UMC, 9045 Vaughn Road! Call 294-4052 or visit itickets.com.
January 24 Sanctity of Life Memorial Service for Those Who Have Lost Loved Ones at 7:00 p.m. Christchurch Montgomery will welcome families who are grieving the loss of a loved one for a service of healing and hope. Whether the loss is recent or in the distant past, we want those who grieve to experience the deep and abiding mercy of the God who longs to bind their broken hearts. If you have experienced this kind of loss, please consider joining us for this special service. Please call Dolly McLemore at 334-301-3490 or check our website www.christchurchxp.net for more information. Christchurch is located at 8800 Vaughn Road, Montgomery, Alabama.
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In an effort to stem the rising tide of suicide in the River Region, The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. is bringing Soul Shop™ to our community. Soul Shop™ is a suicide prevention training and includes a daylong training session specifically designed to train church leaders, clergy, program staff, lay ministers, office staff, and faith-based therapists to detect the signs of someone contemplating suicide and possibly save their life. Additionally, Soul Shop™ trains Church leaders how to minister to surviving family members after a suicide. 6:30-8 pm (Open to the public) February 2, 8 a.m. – 4 p.m. (specifically for Clergy, Church Staff, and Lay Ministers) Hosted by The Samaritan Counseling Center, Inc. and held at First UMC, 2416 West Cloverdale Park, in Montgomery. Call 334-262-7787 or nthomas@tsccenter.org.
Ongoing Happenings AGLOW International meets every third Thursday, 9:30 at the Montgomery House of Prayer. All women welcome to join together for praise, prayer and an anointed message. Contact mboudousquie@yahoo.com. Bridge of Life Assembly of God, 9000 Vaughn Road, Montgomery, holds Sunday morning worship at 10:30 a.m. each week. Sunday school classes meet at 9:30 a.m. We offer classes for all age groups and childcare is provided. Our goal is to build bridges...not walls. We invite you to come join us if you need to learn how to build those bridges. For directions or information call 334-396-0208. Visit www.bridgeoflife.tv. Central Community Christian Church, 981 South Perry Street, Montgomery, holds new members training classes on Sundays at 9 a.m. Sunday School (9:30),
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morning worship (11:00), Tuesday night Bible study (6:30). Every fourth Sunday of the month is our youth Sunday. For more information please call (334) 269-0457 or by email at centralccchurch1@gmail.com. Christchurch, 8800 Vaughn Road, Montgomery, Sunday Worship 9:30, Fellowship/SundaySchool for all ages. Monday: Women’s Enrichment 6:00; Wednesday: Enrichment for all ages 5:30-6:30; Parish-wide supper 6:30-7:30 every Wednesday; Thursday: Men’s Breakfast Bible Study 7:00 a.m., 11th Floor Goode Building/Jackson Hospital; Women’s Enrichment Bible Study and Lunch, 11:45 am- 12:40 pm. Call 387-0566 for info. Chisholm Baptist Church, 2938 Lower Wetumpka Road, Montgomery, holds Sunday morning Bible study (9:30), Morning worship (10:45), Tuesday prayer breakfast (8:30) Wednesday evening prayer service (6 pm) and Senior Body and Soul Group (every 1st Tuesday at 1 pm). Email jbass9784@charter.net or call 262-6437. First Presbyterian Church, 9299 Vaughn Road, hosts a Men’s Prayer Breakfast every Friday morning, 6 a.m. The Youth of First United Methodist Church, Montgomery every Wednesday night at 7:00 p.m. for Wednesday Night Live, a time of praise and worship in “the attic”. Also, every Sunday night at 6:00 p.m. is MYF which includes a snack supper $3.00 followed by activities, small groups and lots of fun! Visit www. fumcmontgomery.org. First United Methodist Church will host Terrific Tuesdays. Please come and join us for fellowship, a program and lunch. Terrific Tuesdays will meet each Tuesday in room 204 of Wesley Hall. Fellowship time will begin at 10:00 a.m. followed by a program at 10:30 a.m. and lunch at 11:30 a.m. The cost of lunch is $2.50. Contact NeeNee Webb at 834-8990. Frazer mom2mom is a playgroup to connect mothers of ages birth to 5 at Frazer UMC to share fun and inspiration in our journey together, with our children, and with Christ. Email Mom2mom@frazerumc.org. Good News @ Noon is an interdenominational Bible study, held at the First Baptist Community Ministries Building on Adams Street, Thursdays, at noon. Small cost for hot lunch. Call 272.1133. Hall Memorial CME Church says: VOLUNTEERS NEEDED! Tutors, prayer-warriors, and office/clerical volunteers needed for the Montgomery City Jail Ministry & G.E.D program. Opportunities are ongoing. No experience or certification necessary. Contact Pastor Anderson T. Graves II, at hallmemorialcme1@aol.com. Call 334-288-0577. The City Jail ministry is an in-reach ministry of Hall Memorial CME Church, 541 Seibles Road, Montgomery. Macedonia Miracle Kingdom & Worship Center (MMKWC), 3070 Selma Highway, Montgomery, services are Sunday School and New Members Class, 9:00 a.m., Morning Worship, 10:45 a.m.; Tuesday Night Bible Class, 7:00 p.m. and Friday Night Prayer, 6:00 p.m. (BOTH at The Pattern-Mt Meigs Road) Messiah Lutheran Church, 6670 Vaughn Road, invites all to Wonderful Wednesdays starting with a $3-5 meal at 5:30 pm (RSVP 277-4213 by Monday noon), worship with eucharist 6:15-7:00 pm, and adult choir rehearsal and Catechism class for 7th-9th graders at 7:00 pm. For information, call 277-4213.
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Mt. Gillard Missionary Baptist Church, 3323 Day Street, holds Wednesday Bible Study in the church Fellowship Hall and lasts for one hour. Please come and participate in roaming the Bible learning God’s word through teaching. The Rev. Henry M. Carnegie, Jr. is the teacher and pastor. Mid-day Bible Study begins each Wednesday at 11:30 a.m. Evening Bible Study begins each Wednesday at 7:00 p.m. Call 233-8750. Open Door Christian Faith Worship Center, 2450 Presidents Drive, Montgomery, holds Sunday School at 9:00. Sunday Morning worship 10:45. Wednesday night Bible study 6:00. Youth Sunday Every 2nd Sunday. Women’s Prayer Monday 6:00. Our Mission is producing believers who make an impact on a fallen society. Motto: Living –Loving-Praying and Walking In The Spirit of Excellence. William E. Cromblin, Pastor. For information call 334-270-6498. Perry Hill UMC, 910 Perry Hill Rd, sponsors a Bluegrass Jam in the Church Fellowship Hall on the third Saturday of each month from 9AM - 12AM. All Bluegrass Artist plus Fans are invited to attend. Attendance is FREE. For information call Kathy@ 272-3174. Perry Hill UMC, 910 Perry Hill Rd, hosts a Wednesday Night Supper and Revive! program each week from 5:30pm til 7:00pm. Reservations are required by noon on the Monday prior to the supper. Cost is $4 per person or $12 per family. Call 334-272-3174 for more information.
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River City Church, 301 Dexter Avenue, offers a Friday Christian Night Club (free of alcohol and smoking) with Ballroom Dancing every Friday at 6:30 P.M. Cost $10 for a one hour lesson, devotional,
and 3 hours of DJ music. All denominations welcome. 7:30-10:30 open dance floor. The River of Life Church, located at 116 County Road 40 E (in the Pine Level Community Center) Prattville. Pastor Nick Edwards invites you to a “Place of New Beginnings”, where families come and grow together. Church Service Schedule: Sunday 10:30 a.m. Sunday School; 11:00 a.m. Morning Worship; 5:00 p.m. Evening Worship. Wednesday 6:00 p.m. Adult Bible Study, Teens (Genesis Project), Jr. High (Limitless), Royal Rangers, MPact Girls, Rainbow’s/Noah’s Zoo Club. Thursday 9:00 a.m.Women of Grace Bible Study. Nursery provided. Call the church office 334-657-0392 or visit www. theriveroflifechurch.net. Saint James UMC, 9045 Vaughn Road, offers S.N.A.G. (Sunday Nights About God!) This program starts at 5:00p.m. and ends at 6:30p.m. Childcare is provided for small groups until 7:00p.m. Don’t forget this program is available for all children! Saint James UMC, 9045 Vaughn Road, offers Wild & Wacky Wednesdays! Wednesday night supper starts at 5:15p.m. We will start checking children in at 6:00p.m. This program ends at 7:30p.m. and childcare is provided until 8:00p.m. for small group participants. Call 277.3037 for more info. Saint Paul African Methodist Episcopal Church, 706 E. Patton Avenue, “Clothes Closet” is open to the public each Thursday morning from 10 a.m. – Noon. The Men of Saint Paul host a free Men’s Prayer Breakfast the Third Saturday of each month at 8 a.m. in the Church Fellowship Hall. The Men’s Prayer
Breakfast is open to all men of all ages. Come and share your concerns and needs of our Men of today. For more information, please contact (334) 3541897. Bible Study is held each Wednesday, 6-7 p.m. in the Fellowship Hall. For info call 286.8577. S-STOP, a commUNITY Bible study for Singles. Souls Strengthened Together for One Purpose. Psalm 46:10 “BE STILL and know that I am God.” Meets at Prattville Christian Academy on Sunday nights at 6 p.m. For info email sstop04@gmail.com. Vision Full Gospel Ministries, 163 Rifle Range Road, Montgomery, holds Bible Study Tues. Night 7:00 p.m., Pray & Praise 2nd & 4th Thurs. Night 7:00 p.m., Sunday School 9:30 am, Sunday Worship Service 10:45 a.m., Internet radio-homecominggospel.com Sunday 3:00p.m. Central & 4:00 p.m. Eastern. and Satellite Radio -wlsg 1340am Sunday 3:00p.m. Women at The Well Ministry invites you to attend its women’s fellowship at 1 pm every 1st and 3rd Saturday. We are women who desire and have a heart to see broken, crushed, hurting women be transformed through the one man who can fulfill their every need... JESUS. All women of all denominations or race are welcome. This ministry is available to teenagers as well. For info contact Evangelist Dr. Linda McCall, 334-220-1924.
Send your events to deanne@ readjourneymagazine.com.
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January 2016
River Region’s Journey
Q. How do you have a wedding without debt?
A. Wow, where do I start on this one? I guess the best way is to tell the truth. How do you have a wedding without debt? It’s really simple. You have a wedding with the money you have. There’s nothing wrong with small, inexpensive weddings. And once you accept that and start thinking about things from a mature, adult point of view, you’ll start realizing you can scrimp and save and have a really nice, small wedding. Lots of people have beautiful, memorable ceremonies and even small receptions for less than $1,000. Sure, you can run out, go into debt and wear an $8,000 wedding dress for a few hours on one day of your life. Or, you can find one that’s much cheaper — even something that’s been worn one time — for a couple hundred dollars. Think
River Region’s Journey
January 2016
that’s tacky? Well, let me tell you what’s even more tacky and dumb — going $15,000 to $20,000 in debt for one day! To have a wedding without debt you have to be creative and think within your budget. That means growing up and not throwing a temper tantrum just because you can’t have every little thing you want. Most people don’t have lavish, expensive weddings, and guess what? Years down the road they’re still married, madly in love and laughing and hugging when they remember the best day of their lives. Please, don’t turn what’s supposed to be a happy occasion into a financial mess that will take years to clean up!
Q. We’ve always just assumed that we
would use credit cards for Christmas, and accepted the fact that there would be a mountain of debt to pay off in January and February. Can you tell us how to make it through the Christmas season next year without accumulating debt?
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A. Giving is a wonderful thing if your intentions—and your finances—are in the right place. But don’t let yourself get trapped in the shopping bonanza just because everyone else is doing it. It’s all too easy to try to justify overspending in the weeks ahead just because it’s a gift. It’s pretty simple. Look at your budget, and see what you can afford to pay cash for during the holiday season. Once you and your spouse agree on this amount, make a list, check it twice and stick to it! Include the names and amounts you are going to spend on each person or charity. It’s just common sense, but it’s easy to find something in the mall you “just have to buy.” That’s where problems start. Giving is not meant to be stressful on your finances. Give with the right intentions, and give with a financial plan in mind that does not include debt. Another thing to remember is Christmas always falls on December 25th. Don’t wait until Thanksgiving to realize it’s right around the corner. You could even get a real jump on things, and set a little bit aside each month toward Christmas starting right now!
# DROP10
Scale back alabama is a FREE statewide weight loss program for adults 18 and older. 2016’s program brings tips and info PROGRAM all year long. HIGHLIGHTS: 10th Year Lose at least 10 Anniversary! pounds and get in the prize drawing. Brand new Scale Back Alabama Phone App Top prize: $1,000 (tracks nutrition, per team member exercise and sends Sign up in January health tips) and weigh in Jan. 25 – 31. GOAL:
Participants eat less and move more to lose 10 pound s in 10 weeks
For online registration and more information, visit
www.scalebackalabama.com
Come Worship With Us!
Programs offered for all ages and stages of life. Sunday 8:30 am 9:45 am 11:00 am 5:00 pm 6:15 pm
Worship Services Bible Fellowship Classes Worship Services Discipleship Classes Worship Service
Wednesday 4:45 5:30 6:00 6:30 6:35
pm pm pm pm pm
First Family Dinner Sanctuary Orchestra Rehearsal First Family Prayer Time Powerhouse (Student Ministry) Sanctuary Choir Rehearsal
Bring them in... Build them up... Send them out... 305 South Perry Street | Montgomery, AL 36104 334.834.6310 | www.montgomeryfbc.org
Jay Wolf, pastor