Everyone’s superman .

Nina Nannar is ITV’s arts editor. After the most difficult year of her life, we are deeply touched that she has chosen to share her memories of her husband Steve with us, to show you the difference your gifts make.

I’m a Kidney Research UK supporter, like you. You may remember that in 2020 I told my story in Update magazine about my husband Steve and his two kidney transplants. Sadly, I lost Steve last year. I’d like to share what happened, because sharing stories is what I do for a living, and I know what power stories have to change lives.

Steve was born with reflux – a problem with a valve in the ureter that allows urine to travel the wrong way from the bladder back into the kidney. In his teens, Steve collapsed. His kidney had completely packed in and the other was barely functioning. He had to begin dialysis treatment immediately.

After three and a half years on dialysis, Steve got a phone call from his doctor who said, “How’d you fancy a kidney?” When I met Steve, that astonishing kidney was still going. It lasted for 30 years.

The truth is, dialysis is a slog. Even when it’s not a slog, it’s a slog.

Coming so close to death informed the rest of Steve’s life. He was so happy to have every single day. Steve meditated daily and loved the simple things in life. He was a very amazing, gentle person.

Steve was back on dialysis in 2016 for nearly two years before he got his second transplant. He had peritoneal dialysis, where they put a tube into your stomach. It meant he could dialyse in our home.

Steve dialysed four times every day. The truth is, dialysis is a slog. Even when it’s not a slog, it’s a slog. It’s a phenomenal process, but it’s invasive and it’s quite unpleasant.

After his second transplant, regaining his freedom meant we could go abroad for the first time in ages. We didn’t know it then, but it would be our last holiday together.

Keeping safe

The following year, Covid-19 arrived. For Steve, this meant he was extremely vulnerable. Even though it was an awful, frightening time, it meant we got to spend all that extra time together. We will always have that year in the sunshine, in the back garden, keeping Steve safe.

Among the many medications that Steve had to take every day was an anti-rejection medication. One of the side effects is an increased risk of skin cancer. Every year, Steve had to get his back checked. Often, he’d have to have a few moles burned off his back, in case they turned nasty. But just before Steve’s last Christmas in 2021 the lumps had changed. Steve had surgery to have them removed and this time, there were cancer cells. And then a lump popped up on his ear too. They had to cut a bit off his ear. And then there was a lump on his neck.

Unfortunately, the cancer cells spread, and Steve’s ear had to be removed the day after his 60th birthday. Typically, Steve was upbeat about the whole thing. He said, “The surgeon told me they’ve got these prosthetic ears they can find. And I’ll have a hearing aid fitted in.” So he was going online and… we were effectively shopping for ears. It was always that way with him, onwards and upwards.

But Steve’s health deteriorated. In April 2022, he received radiotherapy, but the cancer continued to spread.

The consultant pulled me aside and she just said, “I’m sorry, we think he’s dying.” And I was like... just falling off the chair saying, “What?” I couldn’t believe it. “This is Steve Ronson. He’s had two kidney transplants. He’s everyone’s superman.”

Being Mr Positive

I’d first connected with Kidney Research UK in 2019. Steve and I did several fundraising events, including one with Andy Cole, the Manchester United footballer. He’d had a transplant the year before Steve.

I think Andy was having quite a hard time psychologically. He was obviously a superhero, and Steve was Mr Positive. Steve would speak to him on the phone and try to lift him up. I’d hear him saying, “All right, this is what you should do, mate. Yeah, I know mate. It’s tough mate.”

Steve would keep up with news of all the latest research. He’d tell me, “They’ve developed this new drug that’s much kinder and doesn’t have skin cancer as a side effect. So maybe I can move on to that.” Steve was very positive and optimistic because the breakthroughs that were coming were amazing.

I think Steve would be so proud that I’m continuing to support Kidney Research UK, doing what I can to help, to share his story. I think it’s a perfect legacy for him. Steve’s big hope would be that because of new breakthroughs in kidney research, the ending for him wouldn’t have to be the ending for other people in the future.

We’re so grateful to Nina for being so open and for supporting our latest fundraising campaign. To read Steve and Nina’s story in full, please visit: www.kidneyresearchuk.org/steve