Hippo154

KILLIE HIPPO AN UNOFFICIAL KILLIE FANZINE ISSUE NO. 154

Season Greetings

• • •

PETER CANERO INTERVIEW THE PEG SHOOGLES AGAIN STATS, STATS + MORE STATS

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THE KILLIE HIPPO IS ON SALE AT HOWARD ARMS, GLENCAIRN SQUARE, KILMARNOCK FOG’S SNACK BAR, ANNANDALE IND. ESTATE, KILMARNOCK KA1 2RS KILLIE TRUST DESK (PARK HOTEL FOR HOME GAMES) MATCH DAYS AT RP + AT ALL AWAY GAMES

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SHOOTING FROM THE HIPPO

Merry Xmas chums but forgive me if I’m not full of the Xmas cheer this year. I was going to try and fire in a few festive gags, like getting my Xmas pizza at the Village Hut…deep pan, crisp and even. I could even have told you the one about Santa Claus, the honest lawyer and the cleaner for the A*r Utd trophy room but I know you would see right through me as none of them exist. Seriously all I want for Xmas is a total clear out at RP from top to bottom and then we maybe just get our club back.

As the festive season approaches we are plunging further into the relegation scrap and it is only a rapidly declining Dundee Utd that are preventing us from holding up the table. If Mixu does the same there as he did with Killie he will take a while to find his feet then they will click and start climbing the table. Hopefully that is not the case but I’m sick fed up of having to constantly rely on other teams. Wouldn’t it be nice if we actually started showing a bit of pride and commitment and started to win games on a semi regular basis.

The fact of the matter is we are rotten from top to bottom and the attendance at the recent home game against the arabs of around 2300 Killie fans should set big alarm bells ringing in the boardroom. Sadly it wont as the hotel thieves will probably be planning how they can put us into administration, sell the land and build some nice big houses all round the hotel. That may seem a bit extreme but from what I can see they will do anything as long as it means money in their pockets…….the club doesn’t matter.

Our pathetic efforts on the park mirror the mess in the boardroom and our defeat at Inverness cemented our lace in the play off spot. GL has previously pulled a couple of wins out the when he needed them but this current run of poor results may seem him heading back up the A71 for the last time. Some fans are worried that we simply can’t afford to pay them off but I have no doubt there will be 101 get out clauses. One punter reckons there is a clause that allows us to bag him at Xmas if we are in the bottom six……we will find out shortly if that is fact or a pub rumour.

We are lacking confidence, direction and leadership whilst our handling of Kiltie, Slater etc is unforgiveable. I keep hearing the words of Jim Mann at last year’s AGM when he spoke about the youths being our future and we play “the Killie way”. The Killie Way appears to be win as few games as possible, treat the fans like sh*t and treat the young players the same way. I’m sorry if this sounds a bit depressing but we need to deal in reality and you can’t ignore what is staring us in the face.

This is the last issue of 2015 so I wonder if there will be big changes by the time no.155 hits the streets. Have a great Xmas and a happy 2016.

Sandy

PETER CANERO INTERVIEW

It’s great to go to Killie games and see some of your fave players now following the team from the stands. One such player that has been spotted in recent years is Peter Canero who was a fantastic young talent with Killie.

His career was cruelly ended early through injury but Peter still has great memories from his career. We were lucky enough to catch up with Peter recently and here is what he has to say about Killie, Leicester and big arses!!

Peter came to Killie as a youngster and spent his senior career at Rugby Park from 1998 to 2004 scoring 9 goals in 117 appearances. He went on to play

for Leicester, Dundee Utd, New York Red Bulls and gained a Scotland cap in a friendly against Denmark.

PERSONAL STUFF FULL NAME - Peter Canero DATE OF BIRTH - 18/1/1981 PLACE OF BIRTH - Glasgow TEAM YOU SUPPORT - Celtic WIFE'S NAME - Laura CHILDREN - Hudson & Scarlet PETS - Kobe (chihuahua) Lola (Labrador) WHAT CAR DO YOU DRIVE - Kia Sportage FAVE MUSIC - 80s FAVE HOLIDAY - Miami, New Jersey FAVE FOOD AND BEVVY - Chinese & Jack Daniels FAVE PUB - lol, anywhere I can grab a beer these days.

HOBBIES/INTERESTS - Golf, reading, Movies and plenty of more boring stuff.

CAREER PATH WHAT SCHOOL TEAMS DID YOU PLAY FOR? Our Lady of lorreto (Primary School) St Columbas (High School WHAT WAS YOUR POSITION IN THOSE EARLY DAYS? Sweeper & Midfielder! Don't know we're right back came from??

WHAT BOYS CLUBS DID YOU GRACE? St.Euanas, Duntocher, Celtic BC, Celtic North &of course the mighty Killie WHEN DID THE SENIOR TEAMS COME CALLING? Kilmarnock asked me to come along at 15.

WHO WAS THE BIGGEST INFLUENCE ON YOUR CAREER? Definitely my dad. He would take me to all my training and give me advice when he could.

BEST PLAYER - TEAM MATE? Hard one! I got lucky to play with a lot of great guys at Killie but when I moved to leicester I played along with Les Ferdinand who was a top guy on and off the park.

Also Youri Djorkaeff who's testimonial I played in against the awesome Bayern Munich.

BEST EVER OPPONENT? Paulo Di Canio, I managed to play against him at Charlton, he got taken off in the second half!

Lol I managed to play against Barcelona with the Redbulls in a friendly at Giants stadium, I think there was only 87,000 there, not far off the average killie gate!!

WHO WAS THE BEST DRESSING ROOM JOKER? Durranty around the dressing room was priceless! Andy McLaren was off his head also.. Sean Hessey never had a dull moment at his time at Killie, always up for a laugh!!

FANS QUESTIONS DO YOU REGRET LEAVING KILLIE WHEN YOU DID? It's a tough one because I believe you can't look back and regret anything really. Things happen for a reason in my head. On the other hand of course I should have stayed longer but I feel the decision was out of my hands???

WHAT DID YOU THINK WHEN JOHN HARTSON KICKED YOU IN THE ARSE IN HIS FIRST GAME? Lol, do you know I can't even remember that! I'm sure it was accidental??

My arse is slightly a bigger target now!

ARE YOU STILL KICKING A BALL THESE DAYS? Not really, kind if just stopped. I've helped out on a few things involving games but not had a serious game since I stopped all those years back.

TELL US ABOUT THE INJURIES THAT BLIGHTED YOUR CAREER? Emmmm? could be a while, lol! Basically started at Killie before the transfer to Leicester. I required a hip operation then.

From there it just snow balled, cartilage, knee cap clean out and mostly ligament and a lateral release on my hip which was the nail in the coffin!!

MOST ENJOYABLE MATCH PLAYING WITH KILLIE? I think it was my first match at Parkhead playing with McCoist & Durrant.

We lost 2-1 but the atmosphere was incredible.

MOST BIZARRE MOMENT PLAYING WITH KILLIE? Kevin McGowne and Michelle Ngonge?? Rolling around the dressing room at half time fighting over him not picking up someone, think it was not far off his last game.

WERE YOU PISSED OFF WHEN YOU FELL INTO THAT ARCADE MACHINE??

Lol, Me and my mate Maxi had one to many and we're carrying on! The last thing I remember was him trying to lift me up and then the next thing I'm on the way to the hospital.

It was a wake up call as I was probably getting too cocky at that time!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING THESE DAYS? Quiet man, just enjoying time with my family. After staying over in New York for a few years I returned my home and my uncle introduced me to renewable energy with his company Skyform.

I would just like to give a special mention to my friend and great Killie fan Stevie McDougall. I worked with Stevie when I came back from USA and he encouraged me to get back long to watch super Killie.

IN HINDSIGHT SHOULD YOU HAVE SIGNED THE NEW CONTRACT WITH KILLIE IN DEC.2003?

Lol, again this is something that was offered after Killie just about sealed the deal with Leicester. I felt Killie wanted me to leave to get some money, it was an undisclosed fee but it was more than ÂŁ300k. So I feel I never had a lot of choice, remembering I was carrying an injury through that season...

DO YOU STILL LOOK OUT FOR KILLIE RESULTS? Off course, I bet them when I can because they are such a good price, especially at rugby park. NOW I KNOW WHY!!!

WHY DID YOU RETIRE FROM THE GAME? I was not enjoying it! A lot of people beleived I just stopped playing because I couldn't get a club? However I had seen several specialist in the USA who advised me that my knee wasn't great and time off would help.

I felt it never was the same, so just made the decision with my family it was time to move on with something else. I didn't miss it for years but now looking back I definitely did!!

DO YOU HAVE COACHING BADGES AND WOULD YOU LIKETO GET INVOLVED AGAIN IN FOOTBALL? I did some coaching badges at Killie when I was young and also some in New York but nothing that I would get involved with professionally. Never say never, maybe put my CV in to Killie. (Only kidding Lockey).

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE TO THE CURRENT CROP OF KILLIE KIDS? Basically to enjoy it and not to worry about the future. You have plenty of time to become a footballer and give it everything you've got. That way you can always say you gave it your best shot. Not looking back and telling stories about shoulda, coulda woulda!!!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF LEICESTER CHALLENGING AT THE TOP OF THE PREMIERSHIP? Great, hopefully they stay there and can tell the kids I played for the team that's challenging for the premiership.

BEST AND WORST MEMORIES AT LEICESTER? Well, I was cursed as soon as I arrived! They wanted me to play a reserve match to get me match fit to play against Newcastle at the weekend. After 60 minutes of the match I only went and dislocated my collar bone !!!

The best time I had was playing against Liverpool and having my picture on the programme! Pretty cool now looking back on it.

BEST + WORST MEMORIES IN AMERICA? The worst is obvious the last few surgery's that ultimately finished me off shall we say!

The best is, well come on the chance to live in New York and meet NFL & NBA stars, I went to a lot of those games and met some incredible people. I became friends with John Ventimiglia (Artie Bucco from the Sopranos) worth it for that alone!!

Could go on but don't want to name drop! Well a few more then, meeting Pele, Rihanna and Shakira before Redbulls opening day game, not too bad for the shitty MLS! DO YOU HAVE A MESSAGE FOR THE KILLIE FANS? I would like to thank the fans I have meet through out my time, they have been nothing but nice to me and my family. Even as a kid learning my trade at Killie I always loved travelling down there! I hope you enjoyed my interview and not to boring!!!

Take care Peter x Hippo says – Massive thanks to Peter for taking the time to answer our questions. I always remember thinking PC was going to be a real star and although he had a cracking career there is no doubt that injury limited his time and progress in the game.

You will see the big charity night advertised in this issue and I’m delighted to say that Peter is coming along. He is bringing one of his Killie tops to help raise funds………get yourself along to meet a true gent. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

HIPPO APOLOGY

In the last issue we wrote an anti scum article that poked fun at the recent story where the bin rakers are having to get rid of their traditional badge.

I would like to apologise to anyone who feels we didn’t go far enough with our infantile abuse. We are committed to stooping to an all time low if it means having a laugh at their expense……ONE FOR COLIN NEVER WILL.

BEWARE OF A HIPPO BEARING GIFTS It’s the time of year for peace and goodwill to all men, women and children……..but not to the fuds that have annoyed us throughout the year. With that in mind we dipped into the bank account and sent some presents around the country: RONNIE DEILA – We sent the alien a map of South America, well lets face it he obviously doesn’t like hanging around Europe for any length of time.

NEIL DONCASTER – The mug faced balloon has been conspicuous by his absence since he scores an own goal every time he opens his smug gub. We sent him a years supply of Sillett Bang as that may be the only thing to wipe that grin off his coupon….he could maybe pass on some to his parasite pal at RP. GORDON STRACHAN – We sent the wee ginger a signed copy of the best selling motivational book “How not to Over Estimate Shit Football Teams” which he can take to his next visit to Georgia.

We also booked him a fortnight in Butlins for the end of June as he has no finals to attend!

ROD STEWART – A £10 gift voucher for the Bellfield Madras House in case he fancies a munchy box after his gig.

HOTEL THIEVES – I’m sure there are a million gifts we could come up with for the clowns who are slowly and systematically killing our club but we’ll send the following – an assassin, four knives, four forks + 5 spoons well 13 pieces of silver and finally a season ticket for scumerset just in case the assassin misses.

MISSING!!

KFC COMMUNITY ENGAGEMENT BOARD KILMARNOCK POLICE ARE BECOMING INCREASINGLY CONCERNED ABOUT THE ABOVE GROUP WHO HAVE NOT BEEN SEEN FOR OVER A YEAR. THE PUPPET MASTER LOOKS LIKE A FAT RONALD KOEMAN (SEE PIC) AND HIS FELLOW MEMBERS WILL BE EASILY RECOGNISABLE AS THEY WILL CONSTANTLY NOD!

IF YOU SEE THE FAT LAD PLEASE DO NOT APPROACH AS HE MAY BE DANGEROUS……..ESPECIALLY IF YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS HE CAN STRIP. LOCAL RESIDENTS SHOULD NOT BE TOO WORRIED HOWEVER AND SHOULD BE PERFECTLY SAFE AS THEY WILL BE NOWHERE NEAR THE LOCAL COMMUNITY!

A XMAS TALE!!

One particular Christmas season, a long time ago, Santa was getting ready for his annual trip. But there were problems. Four of his elves were sick, and the trainee elves just weren't working out.

Things got worse when Mrs. Claus told him her mother was coming to visit. Then, when he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth. Two others had jumped the fence and were out carousing, heaven knows where.

When he went to load the sleigh, one of the side boards cracked and the toy bag fell to the ground, scattering the toys.

Frustrated, Santa went into the house for a cup of coffee and a shot of whisky, but when he opened the cupboard, he discovered the elves had apparently had a party, and there was nothing left to drink.

Just as he accidentally dropped the coffee pot, breaking it in hundreds of little pieces, the doorbell rang. Santa opened the door, cursing beneath his breath, and there stood a beautiful little angel with an enormous, perfectly shaped Christmas Traditions Christmas tree.

"Merry Christmas Santa," the angel said. "Isn't it just a lovely day to be alive? Look! I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to put it?"

Thus began the tradition of the little angel on top of the Christmas tree.

THE PEG IS SHOOGLY ONCE AGAIN….

This is a topic we covered a few months ago when the manager was under more severe pressure than my waist band. However on the back of another humiliating defeat, this time shipping five at home to the Jags, the question must be asked….“Is it time to change the manager?

We all know that following a team like Killie will have more than its fair share of ups and downs but the defeats we have endured this season have been of the hugely embarrassing variety. We must be the only team on the planet with their own artificial surface that works against us as opposed to giving us an advantage.

I’m not sure how much the pitch is contributing to our pitiful home record but we are losing far too many soft goals and the outcome is that once again we are getting dragged into the relegation battle. Only a matter of weeks ago some fans seemed confident that we would be challenging in the top six this season. Sorry but I reckon if things continue in this vein the only top six we will see will be in the championship next season.

Every decent team has a solid base to build on but our defence has been a total shambles in far too many games this season. Strangely our worst defensive displays have been in front of our own fans and that is one of the reasons our home crowds are barely 3000. It really does defy belief that one week we were scrapping for our lives and keeping a clean sheet yet only one week later we ship five goals to a fellow relegation candidate.

Unsurprisingly getting rid of GL and his backroom team may not be as simple as it seems due to one glaring reason…….(lack of) money. Several people I have spoken to assure me that our financial situation is more precarious than ever.

Maybe once this becomes increasingly clear some fans will eventually see that the all singing, all dancing “debt free” bank deal was done purely to suit a couple of individuals with no regard for the club.

The key in all this of course is the content of the manager’s contract which you would imagine would have 101 get out clauses. That is something we can only speculate on at this stage however given the way Kenny Shiels was treated I wouldn’t be surprised if there is a clause that specifies a manager may be sacked for farting in the dugout.

We revealed earlier in the season that GL would have been bagged if we had lost the game at Tannadice. And that we had a replacement lined up and ready to step in. Ironically we won the game and the probable replacement is now in charge of the arabs…..you couldn’t make it up.

It seems that GL has managed to pull a few results out of the bag when he has needed them most but I do think he is pushing his luck and it will run out sooner or later. I’m writing this a few days before the crucial home game against Dundee Utd and another defeat may just trigger some frantic discussion the hotel thieves and their fellow directors…..or perhaps they will just discuss how the hotel can get even more money out the club.

As I’ve stated before I don’t like clubs that fire managers as often as they change their socks. I’m sure there are exceptions but in general this doesn’t lead to clubs being successful……..Leeds Utd are a case in question at the moment. Having said that football is a results driven business and a few more defeats may see a new butt in the hot seat as we rapidly approach the January transfer window.

When we wrote the article a few months the odds on fave to replace GL was Mixu however his appointment with the arabs means he would no longer be in the running. One major concern is that we don’t have a football person at the club and I have absolutely no faith in any of them to make the correct choice.

Make no mistake, if we do go down the route of a new manager it will be a huge responsibility for the new guy to try and keep us in the top division on an ever decreasing budget. The same names will do the rounds…James Fowler, Gary Holt and Jim McIntyre would all cost us compensation so that could cause us a problem. The guys out of work at present may be an easier option with the likes of Stuart McCall being a name that may be thrown in the ring. I genuinely hope that GL turns things around and unless there is instant improvement I fancy we may be putting out trust in a newbie to continue our lengthy stay in the top division.

FAN’S LETTER Dear Mr Hippo, I had to laugh today when I read that Killie's goalkeeper says that the club needs to keep this team together in order that it can make progress. What progress ? So far this season I have already witnessed 3 of the worst performances that I have ever seen in 53 years of following the club namely the home defeats to Dundee, Ross County and Saturday's disgrace against Partick Thistle.

You could argue that the first two defeats were down to the team getting to know one another but that excuse isn't available for the Partick game. I think that the team worked so hard against Celtic that they thought that they had cracked it with a good result and decided that they would take a day off.

There was only one set of players on Saturday that wanted to win that game.

Technically Killie have some decent players but clubs like Ross County, Hamilton, Inverness and Partick will fight in every game until they drop and have a system that keeps it tight at the back and they work as a very tight unit. We can't seem to do that in home games. No other club in the Premiership would play like Killie did on Saturday. It was absolutely shocking.

Relegation looks a certainty to me.

H.B. Hippo says – Thanks for getting in touch mate and having just witnessed the Partick horror show it is hard to argue with any of the points that you make.

Of course we are going to lose games over the course of a season but the manner in which we are losing games is jawdroppingly bad.

GL’s biggest problem initially was the defence and we simply couldn’t keep a clean sheet, we showed brief improvement but the Jags game was as bad as the early season nightmares. You will see an article in this issue questioning the manager’s position but if he doesn’t tighten that defence I fancy he will be visiting the Job Centre pretty soon.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KILLIE FANS CHARITY NIGHT HOWARD ARMS 30TH JAN.

Just over three year we held a charity night in the Howard and it is long overdue that we had another one. Killie are at home to Hamilton on 30th January so to follow we will be having a top night in the boozer.

I am in the process of sorting out special guests, prizes and a running order for the evening. The big thing is to raise as much money as possible with all monies being split between two charities, Reverse Retts and The Samaritans. If you know any businesses willing to donate a super prize please get in touch.

OH AND I NEARLY FORGOT TO MENTION……IT’S FANCY DRESS SO GET YOUR THINKING CAPS ON.

STATS, STATS AND MORE STATS Home League Scoring Records Description

Record

Detail, dates link to results

Highest scoring win

9

Kilmarnock 9 Falkirk 2, 08.02.1964

Highest scoring loss

8

Kilmarnock 1 Rangers 8, 20.09.1980

Highest winning margin 8 Highest losing margin 7 Highest aggregate

11

Highest scoring draw

4

Kilmarnock 8 Linthouse 0, 05.11.1898 Kilmarnock 8 Dundee United 0, 12.12.1931 Kilmarnock 8 Arbroath 0, 03.01.1949 Kilmarnock 8 Airdrieonians (old) 0, 29.09.1962 Kilmarnock 1 Rangers 8, 20.09.1980 Kilmarnock 7 Queen's Park 4, 10.11.1928 Kilmarnock 9 Falkirk 2, 08.02.1964 Kilmarnock 4 Ayr United 4, 01.01.1948 Kilmarnock 4 Falkirk 4, 03.12.1955 Kilmarnock 4 Dundee 4, 21.01.1967 Kilmarnock 4 Raith Rovers 4, 26.10.1968 Kilmarnock 4 Dundee United 4, 30.01.2010

Away League Scoring Records Description Record Detail, dates link to results Highest scoring win

8

Highest scoring loss

9

Highest winning margin 7 Highest losing margin 8 Highest aggregate

11

Livingston 1 Kilmarnock 8, 10.04.1991 Morton 9 Kilmarnock 2, 21.08.1920 Celtic 9 Kilmarnock 1, 13.08.1938 Livingston 1 Kilmarnock 8, 10.04.1991 Rangers 8 Kilmarnock 0, 21.12.1918 Hibernian 8 Kilmarnock 0, 22.08.1925 Rangers 8 Kilmarnock 0, 27.02.1937 Celtic 8 Kilmarnock 0, 25.12.1937 Celtic 9 Kilmarnock 1, 13.08.1938 Morton 9 Kilmarnock 2, 21.08.1920

Away League Scoring Records Description Record Detail, dates link to results

Highest scoring draw

St Mirren 4 Kilmarnock 7, 01.01.1966 Dundee 6 Kilmarnock 5, 20.01.1968 Queen's Park 5 Kilmarnock 5, 15.12.1900

5

Cup Scoring Records Description

Record

Highest scoring win

11

Highest scoring loss

8

Highest winning 10 margin Highest losing margin 8 Highest aggregate

12

Highest scoring draw

4

Detail, dates link to results Kilmarnock 11 Paisley Academicals 1, 18.01.1930 Kilmarnock 0 Queen's Park 8, 28.01.1893 Motherwell 8 Kilmarnock 3, 08.03.1933 Kilmarnock 11 Paisley Academicals 1, 18.01.1930 Kilmarnock 0 Queen's Park 8, 28.01.1893 Kilmarnock 10 Lanemark 2, 02.10.1886 Kilmarnock 11 Paisley Academicals 1, 18.01.1930 Kilmarnock 4 Annbank 4, 06.09.1890 Kilmarnock 4 Queen's Park 4, 18.02.1928

Full League Sequences Description Record Detail, dates link to results Wins 15 Draws 5 Losses 9 Clean sheets 7 Failing to score 6 without a Win 18 without a Draw 32 without a Loss 20 without a Clean sheet 29 without Failing to score 44

12.12.1959 04.03.1969 06.09.1980 02.09.1989 11.12.1982 06.09.1980 20.12.1952 27.08.1898 17.09.1938 11.05.1897

to to to to to to to to to to

26.03.1960 22.03.1969 01.11.1980 14.10.1989 08.01.1983 03.01.1981 12.12.1953 26.08.1899 08.04.1939 16.09.1899

Home League Sequences Description

Record Detail, dates link to results 19

Wins Draws

4

Losses

6

Clean sheets

6

Failing to score

4

without a Win

11

without a Draw

36

without a Loss

26

without a Clean sheet

19

without Failing to score 30

15.05.1897 to 22.04.1899 29.03.1958 09.02.1980 08.11.1980 10.10.1981 18.02.1989 16.08.1980 02.09.1989 31.10.1998 30.01.1999 16.08.1980 21.08.1999 24.08.1895 15.09.1951 05.10.1963 19.10.1912 28.04.1937 01.01.1927

to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to

20.08.1958 15.03.1980 20.12.1980 21.11.1981 01.04.1989 01.11.1980 04.11.1989 30.01.1999 21.03.1999 01.01.1981 04.03.2000 22.04.1899 12.12.1953 09.01.1965 15.11.1913 13.04.1938 01.09.1928

Away League Sequences Description Wins

Record Detail, dates link to results 8

Draws

5

Losses

13

Clean sheets

3

Failing to score

6

without a Win

31

without a Draw

21

19.12.1959 to 26.03.1960 02.04.1910 to 10.09.1910 11.01.1969 to 15.03.1969 25.11.1905 to 29.09.1906 23.10.1976 to 09.04.1977 13 times, last instance: 10.05.2008 to 30.08.2008 28.09.1912 to 23.11.1912 21.11.1936 to 06.02.1937 21.01.1905 to 16.03.1907 21.03.1959 to 10.09.1960

Away League Sequences Description without a Loss

Record Detail, dates link to results 10

without a Clean sheet 55 without Failing to score 22

26.08.1989 03.09.1898 06.10.1973 22.08.1903 27.04.1897

to to to to to

18.09.1990 19.08.1899 16.02.1974 16.03.1907 02.09.1899

I was looking through some various football stats sites and came across statto.com which is an excellent site and covers any amount of stats on any amount of teams. There are always questions pop up regarding our biggest win, biggest loss etc so you maybe want to keep this as a bit of a reference for the next time you get landed in a heated pub debate.

Of course many of the stats refer to games long ago although on a personal level I will never forget our demolition of Linthouse in 1898. If memory serves me right the Linthouse goalie was wearing pink boots but that may just be the old memory playing tricks again.

There are some of the stats do relate to more recent times and I can say “I was there”.. Our biggest losing margin was in 1980 when we had a horror show losing 8 - 1 against a team that used to play in Scotland, Rangers I think their name was. For any of you fans who were there I’m sure you will remember one player from that game, our young keeper Jim Brown who got brought in and had an absolute howler. I seem to remember he let a 30 yard trickler through his mitts and I think the poor lads career probably was ruined that day.

On a more positive note our record winning margin was the same strangely enough 8 – 1 when we trekked through to Edinburgh in 1991 to witness a fantastic victory. It was Tommy Burns inspired and for all you young pups out there it was against Meadowbank rather than Livingston as stated above. They changed their name from Meadowbank to Livingston having previously been Ferranti Thistle if my memory serves me right. Happy happy days and I bet there were a few folk failed to trap for work the following day!

One final stat to highlight is the record number of home games without a loss.

We had a run of 26 games between October 1963 and January 1965 unbeaten and it is no coincidence that just shortly after we were crowned champions of Scotland….our rightful place of course!

I will be contacting statto.com all the same as he has omitted to record my never to be beaten record of 15 belter bridies before half time.

SPFL 28/11/15 KILLIE 2 V 5 JAGS KILLIE – MCDONALD, O’HARA, MCHATTIE (SLATER 55), BALATONI, CONNOLLY, SMITH, ROBINSON, KILTIE, OBADEYI (BOYD 55), HIGGINBOTHAM (CARRICK 69), MAGENNIS SUBS NOT USED – RIDGERS, HAMILL, BARBOUR + FINDLAY BOOKED – CONNOLLY, KILTIE + HIGGINBOTHAM GOALS – MAGENNIS 23 + CONNOLLY 72 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> PARTICK TH – SCULLY, DUMBUYS, LINDSAY, SEABORNE, BOOTH, MUIRHEAD (AMOO 79), BANNIGAN (WELSH 84), FRASER, LAWLESS, OSMAN, DOOLAN (POGBA 88) SUBS NOT USED – CERNY, STEVENSON, FRANS + EDWARDS BOOKED – MUIRHEAD + BANNIGAN GOALS – DOOLAN 7 + 15, FRASER 52, MUIRHEAD 62 + 75 REF – C THOMSON

CROWD - 3860

DICK OF THE DAY – GARY LOCKE We do try and make the award as tongue in cheek when possible but sometimes (more often these days) the football is so rank rotten that the blood boils and you have to give a “serious” award. It’s always easy to look around and blame others, mainly referees, when you get gubbed but it’s best to deal in reality and look at your own frailties.

This was the first of two games that we said could define our season, if that is true the we are heading down. This was a rewind backto the opening month of the season with the team looking a total shambles especially in defence. The responsibility for this has to lie with the management and a combination of dropping crowds, home defeats and all round apathy will see the manager seeking new employment shortly.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

A thoroughly depressing day all round and a relegation scrap has gone from being a possibility to looking a nailed on certainty. This was a carbon copy of the Dundee and Ross County defeats at the start of the season where we were shapeless, lacked leadership and looked like conceding umpteen goals. Just to rub salt in the wound former Killie kid Muirhead scored twice…….bleak.

SPFL 5/12/15 KILLIE 1 V 1 ARABS KILLIE – MCDONALD, O’HARA, FINDLAY, BALATONI, CONNOLLY, SMITH (MCHATTIE 59), HAMILL, SLATER, OBADEYI (KILTIE 64), BOYD (CARRICK 88), MAGENNIS SUBS NOT USED – RIDGERS, ROBINSON, BARBOUR + ASHCROFT BOOKED – SLATER + HAMILL SENT OFF - FINDLAY GOALS – BOYD 4 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> DUNDEE UTD – SZROMNIK, DILLON, DURNAN, GUNNING, DIXON, SOUTTAR, RANKIN, MCGOWAN, SPITTAL (ERSKINE 81), SINAMA-PONGOLLE (CONNOLLY 77), MCKAY SUBS NOT USED – FRASER, SPARK, DONALDSON, ZWICK + DEMEL BOOKED – SOUTTAR GOALS – MCKAY (PEN) 24 REF – J BEATON

CROWD - 2828

DICK OF THE DAY – HOTEL THIEVES Following last weels debacle it was hard to get inspired about this clash against the basement dwellers especially since once again it was blowing a hoolie and the rain was stating…….I could give the DOTD award to Desmond who gave his name to the howler of a storm we were enduring.

Of course I could give the award to myself as for the umpteenth time I was late in due to fanzine duties and missed the Killie goal from the Tarbolton Tornado.

However the most jawdropping stat of the day was the crowd of 2828 with 500 making the journey from Dundee. God knows our ST figures but it is embarrassing to see around 2300 Killie fans make the effort. The decline ca be placed firmly at the feet of the hotel thieves…….please leave us NOW. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

rWe played ok considering we were the victims of a poor red card decision.

United showed why they are bottom of the league as they were mince however one point from the last two home games make for depressing reading.

SPL 12/12/15 I.C.T. 2 V 1 KILLIE INVERNESS – FON WILLIAMS, WARREN, MEEKINGS, DEVINE, WILLIAMS, WEDDERBURN (TREMARCO 78), TANSEY, POLWORTH, VINCENT, VIGURS (SHO-SILVA 82), STOREY (MBUYI-MUTOMBO 61) SUBS NOT USED – ESSON, RAVEN, LOPEZ ROBLES + HORNER BOOKED – VIGURS GOALS – VIGURS 14 + 32 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KILLIE – MCDONALD, O’HARA, MCHATTIE, BALATONI, CONNOLLY, SMITH, SLATER (CARRICK HT), OBADEYI (KILTIE HT), MAGENNIS, HAMILL (ROBINSON 82), BOYD SUBS NOT USED – RIDGERS, BARBOUR, WESTLAKE + ASHCROFT BOOKED – CONNOLLY, BALATONI, MCHATTIE + BOYD GOALS – CONNOLLY 87 REF – B COOK

CROWD - 2775

DICK OF THE DAY – RADIO/TV PUNDITS With no boozehound minibus taking the road and with the need to write this fanzine I spent a weekend in front of a laptop and missed our annual mid winter jaunt up the A9 although we will be at the Ross County thriller during the Xmas hols. A few of the troops did make the trip and it goes without saying that much like the last few weeks we were mince.

I could give the award to Locke for ongoing mince, the parasites for treating us like mince however I will give the award to the pundits on radio/tv who consistently spout mince. The star of the show was Radio Scotland with one pundit saying he was amazed we made our first sub with 10 minutes to go….he must have been in the boozer at half time! >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Another Saturday, another defeat and another step down the league. Once again we defended like schoolboys and make it far far too easy for the opposition to find the net. This has been a trait throughout GL’s tenure at the club and simply cannot be allowed to continue.

KILLIE BITS + PIECES We told you in the last issue that Killie Youths were due to face Motherwell in the Scottish Youth Cup. Sadly we lost out by a narrow 1 – o in a freezing cold day at Airdries Excelsior Stadium.

Killie fielded a very young team and in fact the goalie was our third choice due to absence and injury.

Motherwell were the better team in the opening period and scored midway through the half. We battled hard in the second half but couldn’t find our way through a well organized and more experienced Motherwell defence.

We look forward to seeing some of the youths throughout the season either on the bench or even getting a run. Splaine must get another chance soon and look out for the likes of McLean, Wilson and Frizzell in the months and years ahead. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Monday 7th December saw the Killie Trust AGM held at the community village at the railway station. Chairman Jim Thomson explained how the Trust have been working hard all year mainly in trying to pay £100k to get a seat on the board of the club.

The current situation is fairly delicate so finer detail could not be given but it is very difficult to get the club to accept the Trust money (probably due to two directors I’d guess!!). The whole thing has been dragging on for ages and it remains to be seen if the club finally accept the offer.

It’s my personal opinion that the offer will eventually be accepted but that may be more to do with our desperate need for cash rather than any genuine desire to get the fans/community involved………..watch this space.

A WHITLETTS NATIVITY

Aaaaahhhh doesn’t that lovely image make you feel all warm inside and ready for Xmas. The lad in yellow is married to the girl in pink who is also his sister while the guy on the right is married to the staffie………who is also his dad.