Hippo157

KILLIE HIPPO

AN UNOFFICIAL KILLIE FANZINE

ISSUE NO. 157

MADRID?,MY HEART LIES AT KILLIE

• • •

KENNY SHIELS INTERVIEW THE FINAL FURLONG FOUR YEARS ON.......... £2.00

THE KILLIE HIPPO IS ON SALE AT HOWARD ARMS, GLENCAIRN SQUARE, KILMARNOCK FOG’S SNACK BAR, ANNANDALE IND. ESTATE, KILMARNOCK KA1 2RS KILLIE TRUST DESK (PARK HOTEL FOR HOME GAMES) MATCH DAYS AT RP + AT ALL AWAY GAMES

HUGE THANKS TO ALL ADVERTISERS, SUBSCRIBERS, DISTRIBUTORS AND KILLIE FANS FOR THEIR SUPPORT. All views expressed are those of the contributors.

E-MAIL : Killiehippo@aol.com WRITE : 20 WITCHKNOWE COURT, KILMARNOCK KA1 4LF NO ARTICLES TO BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT PERMISSION BACK ISSUES 2–155 INCLUSIVE AVAILABLE GET IN TOUCH FOR DETAILS

SHOOTING FROM THE HIPPO I've had several visits to the docs since the last issue as it was spotted that my blood pressure was through the roof. Umpteen visits, blood tests and medicines were tried without getting to the source of the problem. On my latest visit I sat down and my wallet fell out and the doc spotted my Killie season ticket....problem solved. Can I suggest that all regular attendees book a docs appointment because your blood pressure is almost certainly gubbed.

Greetings to the penultimate issue of the season and I've just witnessed a hard fought goalless draw at Firhill which doesn't greatly help our situation especially as the arabs sneaked another win. I would like to reiterate that whatever happens I attach no blame whatsoever to new boss Lee Clark. His appointment was months too late and the indecision by the parasites could ultimately cost us our top league status.

If the Thistle game had been in the first few months of the season we may have said it was a good solid defensive display and on another day we would have sneaked a win, a point would have been ok. Sadly we are in the position where draws don't really help, we have tightened things up at the back but it seems to be at the expense of not scoring at the other end. We are simply seeing how imbalanced and poor GL's squad was and now LC is being asked to perform a minor miracle and keep us up.

I'm not sure how it is going to pan out for the remaining six games but it is going to take a superhuman effort from management, players and fans to see us crawl over the line in 10th place or by winning the play off. Unfortunately and as we predicted a while back, Mixu has got United winning and it is not impossible that they will stay up. After the split you do get strange results and things can change quickly as hibs experienced under Butcher however it doe seem like a three way battle with us and Accies on poor runs whilst United do their best to claw back the deficit.

Once the dust has settled and wherever we finish the post mortem will begin and fingers will be pointed......do yourself a favour and simply do what you can to get rid of Johnston and Bowie, the club is doomed as long as they remain. They have now chased away John Gall of Brownings (see pie article), a man who has put hundreds of thousands of pounds into the club over the years. The fact he is being chased by a guy who put in a quid and his hotel partner is sickening but sums up how the club has been dismantled over the last ten years. Quite simply don't use the hotel, don't buy food at the tea bars and as for a season ticket boycott......we will leave that discussion until the season has finished.

Lets all get behind the team for the last six games, the support at Firhill was fantastic and whatever happens never forget “you'll never take the Killie�.

Sandy

Kenny Shiels Q+A (by Callum Scott) Throughout the life of the fanzine we have carried out many interviews and they always seem to be popular with the punters. They are very popular with me as well as they take up plenty of pages!! We have interviewed many legends over the years like Gary Holt, Willie Watters and the late great Tommy Burns.

Our latest interview is with a man that created a huge impression during his time at Killie and will have his name forever in the Killie history books.

This interview is slightly different only because it was done by my good friend Callum Scott.

It's an outstanding interview and probably for the first time since he left KS tells the fans about his time at RP and his thoughts on our current state. Sit back and enjoy: How does it feel to be back in management?

A: It’s really good; we’ve had two good results –won our last two games.

We have the youngest team in the league and we’re very pro youth. We’re trying to develop a team for the future and bring long term stability to the club so it’s a god challenge for me.

Just three games into the season but what are your targets for the rest of the season?

A: Looking at our budget, if we finish in the top six that would be a massive achievement and that would be the first steps towards challenging for Europe the following season.

You look at the Dublin clubs at they’re way ahead of us in terms of their infrastructure so we’re trying to get Derry back to being a big club.

What are the main differences of the game in Ireland to that of Scotland?

A: There is not a lot of difference, obviously the game in Scotland is a bit ahead but not by much now. Our first game we had 5-6 thousand at it, albeit that was a local derby but the crowds are quite similar to the Scottish games.

You’ll always be remembered for your time in Scotland, what’s your view on the current state of Scottish football?

A: I watch the results and I’m very disappointed with Kilmarnock and Dundee United at the moment as these are teams who should be in the Top Six. You look at stability in football clubs and it’s the clubs who keep their managers that are more successful, St. Johnstone for example.

It’s coming up on four years since you won the League Cup, what are your memories from that day?

A: Liam Kelly’s father (death) is still very focal in my thoughts but the day itself, it’s how we won it -it was quite unique. To beat the Old Firm in the final with a small budget and a style of play was fantastic. We took the game to the best team in the country who were unbeaten in 27 games and it had been a long time since a team had done that in Scottish football (beat the Old Firm in the final).

How do you reflect on your time at Killie?

A: I really enjoyed it and was a great experience and challenge for me.

Now I’m back with Derry City I would like to do the same with this club – build them up to compete against the bigger teams but it will be tough for us.

You left Kilmarnock in June 2013, in hindsight, would you have done anything different in your time there?

A: I probably trusted too many people. When you look back on it, I was honest with myself and honest with the people round about me. I look back with a clear conscience at the work I did with the club; everything I did was with the best interest of Kilmarnock Football Club.

Since you left the club they have scrapped for relegation year after year, do you believe this has been a direct impact of you leaving the club?

A: I think there is an element of it there, yes. I think my departure was surrounded with uncertainty and I’m sure that transmitted to the supporters.

Do you believe Killie have enough to avoid the drop? Be it via the play-offs.

A: Spirit is a wonderful thing. If you don’t have spirit you’re not going to avoid the drop. I don’t see a lot of James Fowlers, Garry Hays or Manuel Pascalis in that dressing room to pull us out.

Do you feel it is essential for Kilmarnock to stay up with Rangers and potentially Hibs set to come up this season?

A: Yes I think Kilmarnock need to stay up –big time.

How do you see the future of your former club? Whether it be in the top flight or the Championship?

A: They need to back Lee Clark, and he has to look at way in which he can engage with the supporters and community. Kilmarnock Football Club needs someone to come in and embrace the whole community and get everyone moving in the one direction.

When you left Killie you were in for a few jobs (Motherwell and Inverness), were you close to getting either of these vacancies?

A: Yes but I couldn’t argue with Yogi (John Hughes) getting the Inverness job as I have always rated him.

Do you believe your media image has gone against you when going for certain jobs?

A: Definitely. Dearie me, if Mark McGhee gets the Motherwell job before me then I have to look at myself.

Would you say you’ve changed since your time in Scotland?

A: Well I’ve become a little more selfish as I used to think these journalists have to put bread on the table and I have to help them. But these boys don’t care about you personally and the online journalists at the Daily Record and the like are just criminal. They slaughter me still to this day.

What does the future hold for Kenny Shiels?

A: I want to keep working in football and do everything I can to make Derry City successful. I would love to come back to Kilmarnock some day and manage them, when it’s right for the club and right for me then I think that would be a very good step but who knows. I’m very happy where I am at the moment and will do everything I can to make this club as successful as they can be.

Hippo says – Thanks again Callum and of course to Kenny for being so open with the Killie fans. It seems that the departure of KS from the Theatre of Pies has triggered a downturn both for KS and for Killie. We have been on a downward spiral for a number of years but there is no doubt that we have been rank rotten since he left.

The question about KS returning one day as manager is one that will have fans arguing in pubs for hours on end. I always say that things are rarely as good a second time around however there are always exceptions to the rule.

I would undoubtedly have had Tommy Burns back when it was rumoured at the time and Kenny is another that has unfinished business. That is all hypothetical however and there would have to be change at boardroom level before it was even a remote possibility.

It is interesting to hear Kenny's views on the state of our club and the Scottish game in general. Perhaps the most telling comment is when he states “big time” when asked if it is essential that we stay up this season.

The Irish season has just got under way and I'm sure many Killie fans will be following the fortunes of Derry City to see how he fares back in his homeland. It goes without saying that we send Kenny the very best wishes and perhaps a few years down the line we will meet in the Europa Cup.....or even a wee pre-season friendly!!

NOT SO PITCH PERFECT The laying of the new plastic pitch has likely caused more discussion than any other over the last year and I suspect it is going to get worse instead of better. It certainly gives opposition managers something to moan about in the run up to games, getting their excuses in early you'd say although most of them end up with three points anyway.

A report in the media this week reckons that they are a health hazard and some cases of cancer are being linked to the rubber crumb that is put on the surface. Here is a clip of the report: Samples of rubber crumb – pellets spread on the artificial turf to improve its bounce – were sent for testing by the Environment Scientifics Group and the results were passed to Professor Andrew Watterson, an environmental health expert from Stirling University .

He said: “This report confirms and reveals the presence of a number of carcinogens in the rubber crumb.

“If the chemicals and metals remain locked into the crumb, there will be no exposure. However, it seems to be fairly clear there may be some potential risk from some of these substances to sports people.

“To what extent and what effect carcinogenic compounds may be taken up through inhalation, skin absorption or ingestion and under what conditions remains the big question.”

I suspect this story wont go away and it may have a big impact on Killie. I know there was talk of doing away with it and putting an artificial pitch and indoor facility behind the Moffat Stand but that all takes time and money, both of which are in short supply.

I am always a “pro grass” supporter and although I did see some advantages it appears the cons outweigh the pros. We should have a proper training facility away from RP and restore the grass pitch, hopefully back to being one of the best in the country. It should also be pointed out that we must be the only club on the planet that install a plastic pitch and it acts as an advantage to our opponents!!

WHERE ARE THEY NOW? You will know that we like keeping a track on ex-players although it has to be said not many of them go on to achieve great things!! It's maybe just a sign of the times but it does seem that it is far more difficult for players to find clubs these days unless they are willing to travel anywhere in the world just to kick a ball for a living. In a global sense football is more popular than it has ever been so it is probably just the case that there are more players now therefore mediocre British players wont find it as easy as was the case 20 years ago.

I was having a look at some of the players who we have let go in the last couple of years and it gets you wondering when you see how difficult it has been for many of them to continue their career. The cynic in me would say they were poor signings in the first place but it's an ever changing market and luck still plays a huge part in many cases.

Here are some of the players that played with us during 2014 – 2015 ubder GL and then departed last summer: CHRIS CHANTLER The left back started his career at Man City and the general feeling when he signed was that he could be a decent signing. He did ok with us and it was perhaps a bit of a surprise when he left although he was hampered by injuries during his year at RP. After heading out the door he was without a club for the rest of 2015 but he has now signed for Macclesfield in what is popularly known as the Conference where they currently sit in mid table seafety.

MICHAEL NGOO The big gangly striker was another with a prosing CV as he started his career at Liverpool. He was in bother down in scum land before even kicking a ball in earnest and that was the highlight of his Killie career! He was released in the summer and is still without a new club.

SAMMY CLINGAN The Northern Ireland international was decent when he got a run of games but like many others he was on the treatment table as much as he was on the pitch. I'm not sure if the training regime or pitch at killie contributed to the injuries but we do seem to have more than our fair share especially during the GL era. Anyway it seems Sammy has continued to be shackled by injuries and as a result he still hasn't fou nd a new club.

NATHAN ECCLESTON The striker was only with us for 6 months and failed to make any sort of impact after arriving on a short term contract. He was another who had started his career at liverpool but has gradually lost his way, maybe we should introduce a “no scouser” signing policy. Again he failed to find a club for the rest of 2015 but has now secured a contract in Hungary with Bekescsaba 1912 elore, now there's a club I bet you thought would never get a mention on the Hippo.

LEE MILLER Another striker who failed to make an impact but I do have a bit of sympathy for him as I met him and he was a top bloke! Anyway I'm sure most of you already knew that he returned to Falkirk where he had been earlier in his career. I only mention him as Falkirk are flying at the moment and if we finsish in the play off spot we may see him back at the Theatre of Pies trying to inflict some damage on us.

You will see a separate article in this issue called “Meeting the Manager” and you will see Lee Clark will probably be bringing in players from down south in the summer. Of course that will all depend on what league we are in since relegation will see the player budget severely slashed. If you look at the names above it doesn't seem we have done very well in previous seasons when trawling the lower English leagues but that may be more to do with managerial ability. I'm hoping LC has a better eye for a player and we will snap up some hidden gems who won't just vanish into oblivion.

MEETING THE MANAGER Soon after the appointment of Lee Clark a meeting was arranged in the hotel from hell for guys from supporters groups, buses etc to meet the new manager and I was privileged to be invited along. I do hope an open meeting is held soon for all fans and I mentioned this to the KFCSA reps on the night.

I won't go into minute details about what was said however here are some bullet points of the things that stick in my mind that came across from LC on the night: • He is a dyed in the wool football man who wears his heart on his sleeve and will give his all for the cause.

• He made a few mentions about fitness levels or lack of as the case may be. How was GL allowed to get away with it for so long?

• He is heavily influenced by Jean Tigana who was his boss at fulham and will introduce some of his best practices to Killie.

• He has built a great contact network through the years, we can expect several signings from down south I suspect.

All in all he came across well, said all the right things and came across as a genuine football guy although the one huge thing against him is time. The appointment was months too late and that may well be the decision that costs us dearly.

SOUTH BEACH SESSION,

TROON PRESENTS SUNDAY 21ST APRIL 2016 TICKETS £21 southbeachsessions.co.uk

FOUR YEARS ON.....WHAT A DAY!!

Lets be honest, it'sbeen a miserable few years to be a Killie fan so in these grim times it does you the power of good to reflect on happier times. Having just passed the 4th anniversary of “Dieter Day” the time is right to look back on a day that will never be forgotten by every Killie fan who travelled up the M77 and made it such an unforgettable occasion.

Rather than having to read my hazy memories here is a wee piece written by a Killie fan who poignantly describes the highs and lows of being a Killie fan: “At 65 minutes, we dared to dream.

Earlier, a nudge in the ribs at around 25 minutes with the ominous pronouncement that “this lot’s just not going to score today” was met with shushing from all around. But it was clear we were all thinking it.

By that stage in the first half, Killie were bossing it, the tactics were working.

A few heart-stopping moments early on with silly wee square passes – across the front of the goal!! – had given way to some nice but fairly ineffectual football.

By 30 minutes though, we were wearing Celtic down, even forcing them to make mistakes and spending more time in their half than in our own.

That first half was a great advert for Scottish football – few fouls, no cards, end to end stuff. Willie Collum, despite what Neil Lennon said rather unsportingly in the immediate aftermath, had a great game. He kept it clean and used a light touch.

A few scrappy moments at the start of the second half were sorted out quickly and authoritatively. He allowed the football to flow, to everyone’s benefit.

The interval though, has to be the most boring half time I have ever witnessed. A film played on the big screens with appalling sound levels (it’s a Hampden problem, get it sorted!).

A nice wee penalty shoot out, a heartfelt presentation to a child off to get potentially life-saving treatment in the US thanks to the generosity of football fans, and that was it. Nae choons, nae atmosphere. Sorry, but we deserve better.

And generally, the Killie fans did deserve better. Squashed into a corner of the ground, all the better to give the best view to the “big team” who presumably

deserved to be there and whom the authorities clearly expected to win. How else to explain the shocking decision to have the Cup ceremony square in front of the main stands, watched by no-one, instead of moving it to where the Killie fans were corralled?

You can tell who’s used to winning. When we scored – oh boy, when we scored – the Celtic fans started heading for the exits. By the time Kilmarnock went up to collect the cup there was only a handful left in the ground.Yet, I recall on the two previous League Cup Final occasions when Killie got a doing, insisting to the Big Chicklet that we stay to the bitter end and we applaud our team for their efforts and when they collected their runners-up medals. Most other Killie supporters did the same.

That’s the difference when you support a team for whom winning is an occasion.

Not only do you savour every moment but you always travel more in hope than in expectation, and behave accordingly.

But yes, by 65 minutes we dared to dream, albeit with our hearts in our mouths.

Celtic certainly dominated the last 15 minutes and at times, it seemed like Cammy Bell was on a one man mission to keep us in the game. He was outstanding.

Our boys didn’t give up, and over the 90 minutes, we probably had as many shots on target as they did. The difference came through an inspired substitution

by Kenny Shiels, who deserves plaudits for tactics which involved taking the game to the big boys.

A great cross in and bang. I’d like to say I was on my feet as soon as van Tornhout struck the ball with his heid but actually, we were all on our feet by that stage anyway. It might have been over in a flash, but all day the exact move has replayed in my mind – and no doubt will continue to do so for many years to come. It was a great cup-winning goal actually; a just reward for a real team effort. And lo, Killie were in the lead. Celtic 0 Kilmarnock 1. Followed by the longest ten minutes of our lives.

We cheered, we jigged, we waved the flags and shouted ourselves hoarse.

Cmon the Killie!! Scarves in the air and a rendition of Paper Roses, the fans’ anthem adopted by Killie supporters like the late Danny Coffey and John Dearie as a rejoinder to all the hate and violence that blighted Scottish football in their youth. Yep, it’s nonsense but it’s our nonsense.

Then, at last, the final whistle.

There have been three times in my life I have been deliriously happy – the first two involved the birth of my children. And no, that’s not an exaggeration. To understand, you need to have followed a team through more dark days than light, through relegation near-misses and all the way through the doldrums of season after season playing for very little, bar the odd decent performance and uplifting, surprise win. Fifteen times Kilmarnock has tried to win that cup and it’s fifteen years since Killie won its last silverware; that’s how meaningful this triumph is.

Arrival in Kilmarnock to join the celebrations was met with the awful news that Liam Kelly’s father had died of the heart attack he suffered in the stands. Folk were stunned and talked of little else: a terrible tragedy for him, his family and indeed, the whole Killie family.

Everyone set it aside for a short while to celebrate the victory with an open-top bus parade all through the town and on to Rugby Park. It was lovely to stand in exactly the same spot as I did after the 97 Scottish Cup win to watch it all, seeing the famous John Finnie Street once again thronged with exultant supporters and townsfolk, only this time to be with my boys and to watch their faces as they joined in the celebrations. These memories last a lifetime.

Rightly, attention today has turned back to Liam Kelly’s loss, for this will always be a triumph tinged with sadness. Football often wears its heart on its sleeve: this is one of those occasions. Condolences have poured in from all around, with the most poignant comments from Kenny Shiels, the Killie manager.

Killie will celebrate and savour its triumph – it’s too important and too rare not to.

But the Killie family will also rally round and look out for one of its brightest young stars and his kin: it’s not for nothing that the club motto is “confidemus”.

An incredible day for us all and it's memories like that that we cling onto while enduring the lows that we currently are suffering. Personally I remember a great Killie crowd, an unbelievable feeling of ecstasy when we scored, lots of hugs, lots of grown men and women in tears then when getting to the bus the draining realisation of how Liam Kelly must feel as the terrible news filtered through.

Never in a million years did I think a League cup Final win could ever feel as good as the Scottish Cup win in 1997...........but it did. How long will it be before we enjoy another memorable cup win?

KILLIE BITS AND PIECES We would like to pass on our best wishes to young defender who broke his leg recently in a training ground accident. The 19 year old is a wholehearted player who loves a good tackle but perhaps he will need to curb his enthusiasm a little from now on. We hope David has a full and speedy recovery and is raring to go when the new season starts in August. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Our recent crowd at the Ross County game was beyond depressing and supplied further evidence that fans are simply drifting away...........something that is not the case with our friends from abroad. At the Celtic game I was sat behind five guys who were obviously not from Scotland although I didnt quite know where they came from. I got talking to the guys, gave them some freebie hippos and found out they are from Norway and although my Norwegian is a little basic I think they support a top division team called Start.

I was sharing this with my old buddy “the Messiah� who commented we get fans from Norway but cant get folk to leave their living room in Dundonald Road! On the same day we had many of our Kaiserslautern chums at the game also who travelled from Hamburg and Heidelberg.

It's fantastic to see these guys make such an effort to come and see Killie, perhaps something should be done to set up a global Killie group and we can get them some recognition/hospitality when they come across again. I would try and set something up myself but I am way too busy at present...anyone out there?

Lee Clark didn't take long to assess the current squad and he announced that three players were free to a good home. Hamill, Robinson and Barbour were all told they could find new clubs, I suspect LC was told he would need to free up some wages if he wanted to find more players in. Hamill is maybe the biggest surprise as he had his moments however there is still a feeling he should be fitter and I fancy the new manager wants us to be way more mobile and athletic than we currently look.

As far as Robinson is concerned I have never rated him and just didn't see what he brought to the table. It seemed just like GL finding a club for an old team mate and in all honesty it was outrageous that he was given a three year deal. At the time of writing he is on trial at Dunfermline under Alan Johnston, that is probably his level.

Barbour is one of those players who looked very promising when he first emerged but he has gone back the way rather than progress. There were rumours a couple of years ago that he came back well overweight for pre-season training and to be fair he hasn't been the same player since that time. I've just read that he has signed on at Kirkintilloch rob Roy until the end of the season..........that's pretty bleak but maybe he will move up to the seniors again in the summer.

None of the three players have featured much this season so without sounding brutal it would be fair to say they wont be missed. Hodson and O'Hara are better at right back than Barbour whilst in midfield Faubert, Dicker, Slater and Splaine will all fill the central midfield roles. At the time of writing there was no word about Hamill but again I think he may have to drop a league to find a club in the current climate.

We have had a few players on trial and have signed two player prior to the thistle game, Miles Addison (defender) and Alex Henshall (winger)....welcome to Killie lads.

NEW LEAGUE CUP FORMAT Everyone is well aware of the many changes that are needed to Scottish football to give it the proverbial boot up the arse to try and get the punters back onside. The beaks tend to react about 10 years too late so it may be a while yet before we get league reconstruction, summer football and state of the art technology.

Small steps are bring taken however and a few months ago they announced a new League Cup format which will come into play this summer. Here is a brief summary of how it works:

From the 2016–17 season, the Scottish League Cup will have a revamped format. On 7 December 2015, the SPFL announced a new format for the League Cup along with a new broadcasting rights deal. From the summer of 2016, the new format will see eight groups of five teams play each other once each in a roundrobin format across July with three points being given for a win, one point for a draw but if matches are level after ninety minutes in the group stage then it will be decided with a penalty shoot-out with the winning team gaining a bonus point.

The eight group winners and four best runners-up will progress into the second round where they will be joined by the clubs that had matches in UEFA competitions during July where the tournament will return to a knockout format. The new format also allowed the SPFL to reintroduce the two-weekend winter break in January.

Along with the newly designed tournament, a new television deal for it was announced as BT Sport took over rights from BBC Scotland.

In February 2016 the SPFL announced the League Cup final would be moved to November.

Many of us old timers remember back to the 70's when league cup in groups was the norm although I dont think it was regionalised. It seems the four group games will start around the middle of July and will be completed in a two week period.........double check your summer holiday plans if you are planning on attending these games!

It will be interesting to see the Glasgow region, surely Celtic, Rangers, Partick, Queens Park plus one other will make a group?

No chance of course so it will be selectively regionalised, there's a new clichĂŠ we can add to the Scottish football vocabulary.

I suppose we shouldn't complain as it will mean less travelling although try telling that to Inverness and Ross county fans who will still have some midweek marathons to encounter. There was also discussion about lowering the admittance prices for these matches so it will be interesting to see what happens......a tenner maximum would be my suggestion.

As far as Killie are concerned it may be something like us, the scum, Queen of the South, Stranraer and Annan however nothing is set in stone and we could get chucked in with the likes of Morton/St Mirren........or maybe they will just lump us in with Inverness!!

It will be interesting to see how crowds take to these games as its very early and many folk will still be on holiday. I'm all for giving it a bash all the same and if nothing else it should means are a bit sharper for the first league game of the season........pity it hadn't started a year earlier in that case!

THE FINAL FURLONG I can hear the voice of Racing legend Peter O'Sullivan as I write this article “Down to the final furlong and Hamilton Accies is two lengths ahead of the battling Super Killie with Dundee arabs a few lengths down and under heavy pressure”. Over to Sue Barker in the Question of sport studio who says, “we stop the race there, what happened next?”

As it has looked for a long time now the whole relegation issue is going to go all the way to the last game or two, something we have been fairly accustomed to in recent history. That doesn't make it any easier for anyone involved although us fans should know by now how much drink is required to calm the nerves. Our current squad and management are largely new to this situation with Killie but there should be enough experience there to handle the situation.

The million dollar question are we good enough to find a few much needed wins that will prolong our stay in the top flight? It was looking like a five horse race and that may still be the case however it is increasingly looking like us, Hamilton and Dundee Utd to scrap out the bottom two places. A poor run could drag the likes of Inverness or Partick into the equation but they may just have enough breathing space as things stand.

I have to admit that I am sick fed up of praying that other results go our way, wouldn't it be nice if we actually took the bull by the horns and grabbed a few wins to sort out our own mess. Our performance against Celtic was admirable and I was genuinely gutted when that goal flew in. I left the previous home game against Ross County totally pissed off and thinking we deserve all we get if that's how we play. The Celtic game was a genuine sickener, we didn't deserve that and with 20 minutes to go I was thinking we are going to sneak a win here.

What a strange game football is, in a season where we have looked like relegation contenders from day one we should be sitting with an unbeaten record against the champions elect. As I write this we are preparing for the trip to Firhill, a repeat of last season's Eremenko inspired victory would do nicely. A win would hugely help our situation and also drag the jags a bit closer to the panic zone.

Our final post split game is against St Johnstone who we have done well against this term, long may it continue. They are just about in mid table safety so hopefully they wont have too much to play for. We may have lost against celtic but the performance was excellent so the standard has been set, another seven performances like that but with a few goals thrown in......we wont win many games if we continue to fire blanks!!

There is a free weekend at the 16th April then we look forward to a further five cup finals. It's impossible to predict the fixtures given the nature of the split but if we are to get 19 at home and 19 away then it would be two at RP and three on the road. Interesting to note that we have only played both Arabs and Accies once at RP although I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing.

Lee Clark has impressed me in what he says although I'd much rather see more points on the board. He does seem to have pinpointed where the problems lie but he has limited time and limited resources to turn things around. One weakness that many have highlighted in the last few months has been the lack of fitness. There can be excuses for lack of ability and quality but never for lack of fitness. I was speaking to a well respected ex-player in the last few days who assured me that during the easter break the training has consisted of run, run, run, run, run......... He ended our conversation by saying “our club will never move on until that ba***rd Johnston goes�..and so say all of us.

There can be no excuse over lack of fitness and the blame for that has to lie squarely at the feet of Gary Locke. He was even given a budget to bring in a guy that would improve the diet and fitness regime. Either the guy was hopeless at his job or the players were ignoring him....I've heard both so make your own mind up. It does seem a bit late in the season to be putting players through rigorous training but if it means snatching a few late points then it is worthwhile.

The parasites will be hating the whole situation as they cant do anything about ST's until they know what league we will be in. I know many fans are threatening to delay buying a ST until there are assurances about what is happening in the boardroom and where the club is going. I'll say for the millionth time, we need rid of Johnston and Bowie before we can all try to pull together and genuinely move forward. Lets put that to one side now and try to make sure we all do our bit to keep the club in the premier League. I do think Lee Clark might do ok but he needs the support of everyone, at least 4 points in against Saints and jags would be a good start.

TOKEN SCUM GAG The pope comes to Scotland and as he's in A*r he drops into Whitletts and spots some local neds.

He gathers a crowd around him and says "I can feel the power of God working through me.....who here needs help from God?" Smelly Boab steps forward and says "I could do with a bit of help with my hearing".

So the pope puts his hand on his ears, looks to the heavens and says “ Help this young man Lord in his hour of need” He steps back and asks “How are you now child…..is that any better” Boab replies…

“How the feck would I know, my hearings not until next Thursday”

BYE BYE KILLIE PIE You will probably be aware of this but the club are chasing Brownings from doing the tea bars and rumour has it that the parasites are trying to get the catering done via the Park hotel. Time will tell if thats the case but the fact that a great Killie man (who has invested a huge amount into the club) has now joined the huge list of pissed off local businesses tells you all you need to know about how our club is being run.

Of course they are not happy at leaving it there, they are trying to take Brownings to court to challenge the use of the word “Killie� in our famous pie. Brownings have marketed the product superbly well and of course will have made money from that but at the same time they have invested many thousands in the club and that will now drop to zero investment. Could it be the case that the parasites are deliberately just trying to kill the club, it will let them flatten the ground and make a fortune out of selling the land??

Of course it is proper that the food contract should be put out to tender and Brownings can then bid with everyone else. However it is the way the parasites do things that get you pissed off, I wonder who will pay the legal bills of the court case??

At this moment in time every single person with the club at heart should be chanelling their energy in doing whatever they can to keep us in the SPL......of course the fuds doing this have their bank accounts at hear and not the club. At the same time I hear financial guru has walked from helping the club, we really don't have many left over there.

I make no apologies for saying once again we need to get rid of Johnston and Bowie and the best way to do that is starve them of funds. Don't use the hotel, the hospitality or anything that means money going to them and allowing them to kill the club. If we do go down fans will probably be more inclined to act than if we stay up however action needs to be taken to save the club regardless of where we finish. Sadly there are still fans with their heads stuck firmly in the sand or up their bahooky who will do nothing and will simply watch us die.......hang your heads in shame.

SPFL 27/2/16 HEARTS 1 V 0 KILLIE HEARTS – ALEXANDER, PATERSON (AUGUSTYN 76), OZTURK, SOUTTAR, ROSSI, WALKER, SUTCHUIN-DJOUM, BUABEN (COWIE 62), NICHOLSON, REILLY (DELGADO 68), DAUDA SUBS NOT USED – HAMILTON, GONZALEZ, OSHANIWA + ZANATTA BOOKED – BUABEN + WALKER GOALS – WALKER (PEN) 7 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KILLIE – MCDONALD, HODSON, O'HARA (FAUBERT 29), MCHATTIE, BALATONI, FINDLAY, SLATER (BOYD 65), DICKER, KILTIE, OBADEYI, MAGENNIS SUBS NOT USED – BRENNAN, ASHCROFT, CARRICK, HIGGINBOTHAM + FRIZZELL BOOKED – FINDLAY + MAGENNIS GOALS – SFA REF – D. ROBERTSON

CROWD - 16354

DICK OF THE DAY – LEVEIN It was all a bit of a mad rush as I was working in the morning, It was a case of stop before one, jump in the car and hope the traffic was kind to me. Dinner was a sandwich getting stuffed in the gub while driving and as I hadn't got my ticket I hoped Hearts did their usual, advertise it as all ticket and then

have a cash gate.

There is a fair sprinkling of dicks in Tynecastle so the award is never a problem. It didnt go to their commercial department as predictably there was a cash gate although you should buy in advance as its cheaper. I could give the award to the classless Neilson but in all honesty he is just Levein's puppet. Their teams are always boring, niggly, physical and annoying......some things never change.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Lee Clark was trying things out and poor O'Hara seemed to suffer the consequences. He played in three different positions before being sacrificed in half an hour for Faubert. Plenty of effort but our lack of goals could ultimately kill us.....we need to sort it out urgently.

SPFL 1/3/16 KILLIE 0 V 2 ROSS CO DICK OF THE DAY – PARASITES

You know how I love the two club killers but they get the award this time for managing to reduce our crowd to around 2500. They won't be happy until the place is padlocked and sold for houses....what are you prepared to do to stop that happening?

SPFL 12/3/16 DONS 2 V 1 KILLIE

DICK OF THE DAY – WILLIE MILLER

Sadly I missed this game and was subjected to this pathetic failed manager inflicting his totally biased views about our game. He was out his depth as a manager and is the same as a pundit....a complete northern dick.

SPFL 19/3/16 KILLIE 0 v 1 CEPTIC DICK OF THE DAY – ROGIC

I can normally handle defeat quite well these days however I was totally gutted when this dick fired a belter into the top corner in the last minute. Football is cruel, we simply didnt deserve that and his next ten tries at the same thing will probably end up in row Z.

SPFL 1/3/16 KILLIE 0 V 2 ROSS CO DICK OF THE DAY – KINGSLEY before I recover.

It's nice to see Davie Dodds back in football but surely he can do better than being a Thistle mascot. It truly is a horrible sight and I will be visiting my therapist for several sessions

WELCOME TO KILLIE MILES ADDISON

If you are a striker who plays for one of the teams that end up in the bottom six then here is what you are about to face in the run in....man mountain Miles Addison.

The big man made his debut at Firhill and headbutted a floodlight in the first five minutes. It's no secret that superman wears Miles Addison pyjamas.....welcome to killie big man, you are welcome on the boozehounds bus any time.

KILLIE LEGENDS RYAN FLYNN

The picture above was taken on May 8th 2010 and shows Falkirk's Ryan Flynn down and out after he missed a late late chance in front of the Chadwick stand. The miss meant the game finished goalless and Killie, under Jimmy Calderwood, survived by the skin of their teeth.

There could be a lot of twists and turns still to come but you do get the impression that once again our fate could go down to the wire. I'm not sure if my ticker will hold out but a repeat of the