Hippo162

KILLIE HIPPO AN UNOFFICIAL KILLIE FANZINE ISSUE NO. 162

WE LOVED IT TOO BOYDY!!

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THE OTHER ELEVEN OH NO, HERE WE GO AGAIN YOUNG PLAYERS AT KILLIE

THE KILLIE HIPPO IS ON SALE AT HOWARD ARMS, GLENCAIRN SQUARE, KILMARNOCK FOG’S SNACK BAR, ANNANDALE IND. ESTATE, KILMARNOCK KA1 2RS KILLIE TRUST DESK (AVOID PARK HOTEL FOR HOME GAMES) MATCH DAYS AT RP + AT ALL AWAY GAMES HUGE THANKS TO ALL ADVERTISERS, SUBSCRIBERS, DISTRIBUTORS AND KILLIE FANS FOR THEIR SUPPORT. All views expressed are those of the contributors.

E-MAIL : Killiehippo@aol.com WRITE : 20 WITCHKNOWE COURT, KILMARNOCK KA1 4LF NO ARTICLES TO BE REPRODUCED WITHOUT PERMISSION BACK ISSUES 2–161 INCLUSIVE

AVAILABLE GET IN TOUCH FOR DETAILS SHOOTING FROM THE HIPPO Greetings all you lovely Killie folk and welcome to the third issue of the season, I would just like to say thanks for helping us sell out the first two issues…….many of you will see I sold out years ago but I firmly deny such outrageous criticism. On quick moan, how the f*** did Coulibaly’s goal at Hamilton not even make it as a contender for goal of the month? If the goal had been scored by our bigoted twins it would have been hailed as “world class”. By way of noising them up more the wee man scored an even better one at Dens, it will be about the 68th best goal of September!

We are now working our way into the season and having seen around half the teams in the league so far I really believe there is a lot of bang average teams out there so I hope we pay them a little respect….but nothing more. I was delighted with our attitude when the orcs invaded Killie on a Friday night. Kiltie showed up the midfield as pedestrian although in all fairness the wee man is a class act. It was great to see the youngsters adding energy and enthusiasm to the engine room, something we have lacked for a few years now. Much was made of the Greg Taylor tackle, it was simply a poor challenge by a young inexperienced lad who was suitably punished and who will hopefully learn from it….let’s move on.

A couple of our loan players are no longer with the club hence why Clark is still looking to bring in a few. Waddington never showed anything and is away back down to Stoke, it will be interesting to see in what direction his career goes. Goalkeeper Oliver Davies was sent back down to Swansea who promptly released him, that has to go down as a bad few days in anyone’s book!! Hopefully he will find another club soon although it does appear he has got quite a bit to learn. Conrad Balatoni was the final unwanted player to depart but I hope he visited the docs to get all his jabs before heading to the land that time forgot.

Off the field things have been very very quiet and I believe that is a very good sign.

There is nothing getting put out there but having spoken to a few folk who I trust my educated guess is that things could happen fairly soon and it will be good news all round. IF the parasite does leave we really need to ensure it is shouted from the rooftops and that is grabbed as the opportunity to unite us all once again……I will even buy a ST again! Once he pisses off back to his golf club you can expect to see serious investment with the potential for much more as well as new faces in the boardroom. Of course we have to hope they are in it for the right reasons but I’m sure they will be even though I will never understand Bowie’s actions unless he simply wanted the hotel. There is no doubt his decision to prop up Johnston was the wrong one, I hope he accepts that and has learned from it. Thanks again for all your articles and please keep sending them as the next issue will be out on October 1st….make sure and head to the Howard that day (see details inside).

Sandy

YOUNG PLAYERS AT KILMARNOCK It’s no surprise that Killie fans are anxious even at this early stage of the season. We have more than our fair share of relegation scraps and there was a lot of optimism attached to Lee Clark and all the new faces he has introduced to the club.

Unfortunately we have looked a bit disjointed in the cup games and early league games and the following letter from a Killie fan is probably a fairly popular point of view as things stand (just after the Ross County defeat).

Dear Mr Hippo

Why is it that young players never seem to reach their potential at Kilmarnock. They get to a certain level then never get any better until that Is they go to another club. The termination of the contract of Mark O'Hara in the summer was to me an act of gross incompetence. One of the best young players in the league was handed to Dundee for nothing and now look at him.

Hartley moved him into midfield and he us now dominating matches and scoring goals. Why isn't he doing that for Killie instead of playing out of position at right back. What is more galling about this is that Dundee will reap a fat transfer fee for him within the coming year with Killie getting nothing……it’s totally unacceptable.

Players who have left Killie always come back to bite us. What is the point of even going to Dundee in two weeks time. You just know that O'Hara will play out of his skin, probably score and win the game for them. Look at what Harkins did to us every time we went there.

Clubs like Dundee Utd and Falkirk seem to rake in fees of half a million for young players that have hardly played any first team games. That never seems to happen to us. Kiltie who starred for us at the end of last season and seems to have gone off the boil. Maybe he is not being played in the right position ?

Barry McKay was another player that was given away by Killie and look at him now as well. Syme was snapped up by Partick Thistle who have a better team than us at the moment. Are there any teams worse than us ?

What we have now is a team full of English journeymen some of whom have never played regular first team football. These guys won't cut it in the Scottish Premiership. Even if they do settle some of them will be away in January as they are only here on short term loans. There is no sense of continuity or building for the future at the club. There are no young players coming through who stay in the first team. We might as well not have a youth policy.

I realise that the club doesn't have any money but I would rather get relegated with a team full of young locally developed talent than what we have now. We can't score and are conceding soft goals so nothing really changes. Other teams pick up our best young players free of charge while teams like Highland pygmies Ross County effortlessly pillage us for three points every time….that’s six hammerings in a row we’ve taken from them now.

When are we going to get people at the club who know what they are doing ?

It's hard to be optimistic given where we are at the minute.

I think that Clark needs more time but the signs are not good. Delusion seems to have set in already. The manager says that we matched Ross County. He must have been at a different game. County won in a canter and it was the most predictable home banker of the day.

Although Killie fans didn't want him because of his Rangers connections, the club would have been better off trying to persuade McCulloch to take the manager role. He did quite well as interim boss. Now with Ian Durrant unemployed he would have been a good bet to come in and assist.

It's a great mistake to appoint someone who has no experience of Scottish Football. The game is different up here. There is less time available on the ball.

You don't have to be the greatest player technically but you need to be have the right attitude and be able to win individual battles as well as having good energy. Clark hasn't brought that type of player into the club.

The jury is very much out I'm afraid and in the meantime we will have to sit back and watch this O'Hara shambles unfold and it will come back to bite us big style this season.

HARRY B.

CHECKING OUT THE OTHER ELEVEN We always like to have a look at our poor competitors every year as they struggle to keep up with the tradition, history and brilliance of the world famous Killie. It goes without saying that we have disappointed in the last few years and it’s only the incompetence of certain opponents over the years that has saved our skin.

It was a surprise to most that the arabs were the lambs to the slaughter last season and I wonder what team might plunge this time around. There will be the usual suspects, I just pray that we find a bit of improvement. Let’s have a look through the other teams and see where their strengths and weaknesses lie: ABERDEEN The Dons did well last year and gave Celtic a run for their money for a while but ultimately they came up short. Their efforts last year got them into Europe but like most clubs they were out before the season started for real and that may well be having an effect.They have won only once in their opening four games and even that was a scrambled win against Thistle. In their defence they knocked the scum out the League Cup so they gain some brownie points in my book. McInnes seems to be doing a decent job overall and with guys like McGinn, Rooney and Storey in the team they should have no problems finding the net. I reckon they will pick up in the coming months and will once again be in the upper reaches: PREDICTED FINISH – 2ND

CELTIC It has been a good start to the season for the champions as they just about got through the Champions League. They won’t progress any further but fair play to them as they will rake in millions and the other teams in the league will benefit to the tune of £200k plus.

In all honesty I don’t think the introduction of Scotland’s newest professional club into the league will make a blind bit of difference to the final outcome. Guys like Griffiths and Dembele will have a field day and will both score 20+ goals probably, fire power that other teams simply don’t have.

They may be distracted by the big games in the Champions League along with the visit of the mighty Killie shortly but you could give them the league title now: PREDICTED FINISH – 1ST DUNDEE I haven’t checked the record books but it seems like a long time since Dundee were the only representative from the city of discovery…….or “crap hole” for short. Sadly three bakers, two chinese restaurants and a McDonalds have all closed down this week as Harkins moved to the land that time forgot.

I never liked Hartley as a player, he always looked like a wee shoplifter and he has managed to maintain that heir of dishonesty as he got older. He does appear to be a decent boss all the same although they will find it hard having seemingly been forced to sell their best two players. They should be ok but I think they will be bottom six.

PREDICTED FINISH – 7TH

HAMILTON If you are a regular reader you’ll know I don’t like this lot, time wasters, crap crowds and generally bring very little to the party.

They were poor last season and the fans were less than content with Canning as boss but he has kept his job for the time being.

I wasn’t impressed with them a few weeks ago even though we made very hard work of beating them. They have picked up a wee bit since then but I can only see another long hard relegation battle for them and this time I think they may just lose out.

PREDICTED FINISH – 12TH HEARTS The Jambos are nothing special but they are probably better than the rump of the league so should have a fairly decent season. Plenty of Killie interest as Muirhead and Sammon are included in their ranks, it will be interesting to see how both perform.

Over the years they are generally a big strong and physical team who are not good on the eye but generally grind out results…..I can see much of the same this time around although the boss doesn’t impress many of their fans.

PREDICTED FINISH – 3RD INVERNESS All does not appear to be well up in the Highlands with yogi moving on and a young unproven boss put in there. They started poorly but got a win last week so may improve. It’s a hard place to go but I fancy that they will be down amongst the relegation battlers.

PREDICTED FINISH – 10TH

MOTHERWELL I would dearly love to see them to fail miserably purely because their manager is a dick. They had a fantastic run from February last season that saw them go from relegation contenders to top six. It was all a bit of a surprise and I’m not sure how they will perform especially after losing star man Johnson.

They are a team that could claw their way into the top six or could plummet down to the nether regions. We’ll predict a decent finish in the hope that I’m tempting fate!!

PREDICTED FINISH – 6TH PARTICK THISTLE The Harry wraggs are much like us except that they are uglier, more paranoid and very easy to dislike. Their abject hatred of Killie is baffling but there is always a wee edge to the game when we play them.

We were close to them for most of last season and I can see the same again this time around. They seem to have a run of good results followed by a run of mince……. like many of the teams in this league.

PREDICTED FINISH – 11TH ROSS COUNTY Jimmy Mac continues to do a fine job up there and as long as McGregor provides the financial support they should be ok. They beat us recently without being too impressive and I fancy they may not be as elevated as in recent years but with Boyce continuing to score goals they shouldn’t be in any danger.

PREDICTED FINISH – 8TH

RANGERS It’s always good to welcome new teams into the league but in this case I’ll make an exception. They still appear to be offering inflated wages to average players………Senderos is the latest recruit who will bring SFA to the Scottish game.

Killie were excellent against them recently and I was delighted to see we weren’t giving undue respect to teams who don’t deserve it.

They do have the second highest budget in the league and that is where they should finish but I suspect that won’t be the case as they look bang average with a dodgy defence. They may well improve as the season progresses and the introduction of Barton will give the Killie parasite some wet dreams but I think their fans may have a totally underwhelming season.

PREDICTED FINISH – 4TH ST JOHNSTONE I reckon they have been punching above their weight for a while now but Wright continues to do a decent job and I can see that continuing for another year. They have had cup success and euro trips and from a Killie view point that is what we should be doing…..on our way to world domination.

It is quite depressing when you look at a town that is smaller than Killie and is not a traditional football loving heartland yet they have consistently finished above us in recent years. They don’t have good crowds and I’m pretty sure their budget will be smaller than ours but they have shown an admirable level of consistency in recent campaigns. I wonder how long they will maintain it however they should be just fine this year.

PREDICTED FINISH – 5TH

KILLIE We always leave the best to last though I’m still trying to acquaint myself with the weekly influx of new players. The last few years have been unacceptable and the stress levels in the stands have been as high as the price of the luke warm honking lager in the hotel.

I think we were all agreed that major change was needed on the playing front as the players over the last couple of years proved they were only good enough for the lower regions of the league. It may well have been that poor management had contributed to the poor performances however fresh faces were needed and it can’t be denied Lee Clark has gone out on a limb with his signing policy.

We have had a pretty mixed start to the campaign with poor showings in the cup games although I do have a wee bit of sympathy with Clark here. These were our first games of the season and it was probably due to financial reasons that we didn’t have any friendlies prior to these games. Hopefully that is a lesson learned and next summer we will have a new board, some cash injection and we will be far better prepared for the campaign.

I’m jumping a bit ahead here, lets have a close look at how we are going to perform this season. I really hope that the new players will gel and improve as the season goes on as there has been massive change. There is no doubt the manager is still trying to suss his best team and formation and once we get a settled side I foresee better results will follow.

The Sevco game was encouraging and hopefully something we can build on although it seems the introduction of Killie’s own youngsters was the main reason…….mon the Killie PREDICTED FINISH – 10TH

OH PANTS…HERE WE GO AGAIN Throughout all the years of doing the Hippo there are certain topics that rear their ugly head on a regular basis. On the subject of “ugly heads” they don’t come much more horrible than the bigot twins from Glesga and their imminent departure from Scotland has been discussed on umpteen occasions.

I dearly wish they would go but I still don’t see it happening and even if they did move theu would want to keep a team up here as well probably. I think if that happened I would just give up football altogether.

Perhaps the demise of the late Rangers kept the stories quiet for a few years however a new club has returned to the top flight and the tabloid crap has started again. Here is the latest take on the mass exodus down south: Shaun Harvey, the English Football League chief executive, says that his members will decide whether Celtic and Rangers can join a new 'fifth division' planned for the start of the 2019-2020 season.

The 72 EFL clubs are being asked for their opinions on how the Football League expands to four divisions of 20 teams each, as part of the 'Whole Game Solution'. The two Scottish clubs have long been considered a possibility for the new 'fifth division' and Harvey says the final decision will be down to his members.

"We have recently gone out to our clubs to elicit their further views in relation to any different number of areas from the proposition that was first put forward. Once we have their views we can move forward," he said.

"One of the simple questions is, if this is to proceed, is where should the [new] teams come from? So the only ones who will decide that are the clubs themselves, so we will see what they say. I don't want to pre-empt anything."

The Old Firm rivals would bring considerable clout to any new set-up.

Both clubs have massive and fervent fan bases - Celtic had a gate of 57,758 for their 4-1 win over Aberdeen on Saturday, Rangers attracted a crowd of 48,716 for the recent victory over Motherwell - as well as illustrious histories. The benefits to the wider football community in Scotland might be less obvious.

The new format for what was previously the Football League Trophy, now the Checkatrade Trophy, begins this week with 16 under-23 sides from Premier League and Championship clubs competing alongside League One and Two clubs. The likes of Chelsea, Leicester City, West Ham and Southampton are all competing in the trophy, but many have declined the invite.

Arsenal, Liverpool, Tottenham Hotspur, Manchester United and Manchester City have all turned down the invitation. West Ham will compete but not play their games at their home ground because of restrictions in their lease on the former Olympic Stadium. Chelsea will play their games outside the international breaks because the London side do not have European commitments this season.

Harvey defended the decision to allow clubs from the two top divisions to enter teams into the trophy, saying that the earnings from the competition had been steadily declining, along with attendances. The prize money is now up to pounds 1.95?million from pounds 500,000. Of the 48 clubs in last year's competition, 29 earned less than pounds 10,000, the amount that a single group-stage victory is now worth.

Harvey said that last year attendances for the competition were down by 18 per cent, that gate receipts were down by 11.5 per cent and that change was needed.

Spurs did not want to compete because they are in their first season in the Under-21s Champion League competition and want to commit to that. Newcastle and Aston Villa have withdrawn because they say they do not yet know what kind of squads they will have to work with in the Championship.

Harvey added Manchester City "had already made commitments and sent players out on loan for the season and didn't want to keep them at the club just for these three games".

Manchester United had withdrawn, he said, because "they felt the demands on their squad due to [junior and senior] international call-ups meant they felt they could not do the competition justice.

"The thing that has tended to upset some fans of our clubs is in respect of this being the thin end of the wedge and the forerunner for B teams potentially coming into the Football League pyramid. It isn't.

"The two things are completely separate and I think ultimately it is the fear of that which is causing the majority of the unrest. I think the majority of our fans actually understand that creating the opportunity for young players, particularly if they are English, will help us all on an international basis."

Hippo says – so there you have it, once again these two sought after (mental) institutions are crossing Hadrians Wall to the lan of milk and honey. I really would love to see the reaction to their air head followers when they eventually realise no cups, no Europe, no OF loving refs………bring it on.

As many knuckle heads dream about going to England check out the Twitter warrior who headed in the other direction:

HOWARD ARMS 1ST OCTOBER Killie fan George Kelly is going out of his way to raise money for charity, Challenge Cancer Uk to be specific. The local lad is climbing Kilimanjaro this month to simply try and raise as much money as possible for such a worthwhile cause. Here is what George has to say Cancer is something that effects everyone in some way at some stage of their life. And in recent times this seems to have came to the fore more in mine..

I wanted to help as I'm sure we would all like to in some way but I didn't know how or what. So I made a decision to do something different and challenging to show my support and to raise funds to help support those effected by this.

For those of you that don't know I have suffered from depression for a number of years and a year or two ago I didn't have the confidence or the belief to even think about something like this.

Any contribution is greatly received and it all makes a difference to someone's life.

By way of support we are holding a race night on Saturday 1st October, after Killie’s home game against Aberdeen. The fun will start at 6pm and we will have some special Killie guests…..check out Killiefc.com and Facebook/Twitter where we will confirm the guests. The first race will be at 7pm and we are looking for everyone to help by buying a horse, selling races or donating a bottle of vodka, whisky etc……no Buckie allowed!!

There will be a karaoke after the races so get yourself along for a great night with Killie folk and all oney raised going to a great cause. If you want to help in any way drop me a message or e-mail killiehippo@aol.com......Cheers

RUGBY PARK GROUND NO.42 We have featured reports in the past from guys that visit grounds all over the UK. This guy has been visiting all the grounds in Scotland and he obviously leaves the best until last. Here is his report on his vist to the Theatre of Lies for the visit of Sevco: Travelling home from Annan last week I began to worry that attending all 42 grounds might not be possible.The dreaded scenario of missing out by one ground due to poor planning played on my mind.On Sunday, I sat down with a pen and paper and planned my football viewing for the season.

Two key rules I decided to follow were “double headers are good” and “always be flexible.” With that in mind, when the opportunity to attend two games this weekend was presented to me, I had to investigate.

A last minute decision to visit a lower league ground is unlikely to present any challenges. You walk up to the gate, pay your money and you’re in.

I was aware that Kilmarnock v Rangers, my game of choice was unlikely to be as simple.

The key questions, was it possible with the transport available? Yes. Would I be able to buy a ticket? Yes, they would be on sale right up until kick off, I was told after a call to the Kilmarnock ticket line. Brilliant!

Fast forward 24 hours and I receive a tweet. Tickets will only be on sale until 6pm.Transport planned, that left me up against it.

Was this accurate? Best check with the ticket office. No answer, several times.

At least they had some recorded match information available on the phone.

“The next home fixture is Partick Thistle on the 17th of May…” Months out of date and frankly useless.

Despite having been assured that tickets would be available, I was left to make the long journey unsure of whether I would be able to watch or not.

This was frustrating.A bit of luck was enough to get me to the ticket office a matter of minutes before closing time.

Those familiar with Scottish football will be all too aware of the civil war that has been unfolding at Kilmarnock FC in recent years.I don’t know enough about the issues to take sides but looking in from the outside it seems the fans are desperate for change in the boardroom.

Attendances in recent years have fallen dramatically as people are priced out, put off or perhaps simply finding things they would rather do.

At £26 a ticket for the match tonight, who could blame them?

The board will have profited from the Rangers fans attending in their droves tonight, but what does this price do to attract the people of Kilmarnock that may attend every now and then?

The stadium itself is from a different era in Scottish football.

The stands are impressive but the capacity of close to 18,000 seems baffling.

Perhaps 20 years ago when the renovation was completed it seemed like a good idea. Indeed, in the first season of the SPL (98-99), Kilmarnock’s average attendance was 11,184.

Tonight saw a crowd slightly greater than that, although the majority filled the two away stands behind the goals.

Football, like the world, has changed a lot Since 1998.

With an average crowd of 3993 last season, Killie don’t need a stadium this size.

It’s an impressive stadium in great condition, but it feels unnecessary.

Tonight the home end was fairly busy, and the atmosphere was boosted by the excitement on the pitch.

There was a buzz before kick off, largely created by the travelling support.

As the players warmed up the sun shone brightly in my eyes, those around me began to complain. Would this be a regular complaint if summer football was ever embraced? Would we be left longing for the bitter dark of winter?

As with Annan, the pitch at Rugby Park is made of artificial grass.

Last season there were frequent complaints about the quality of Kilmarnock’s pitch. Beyond a couple of slips there are no obvious signs of a poor quality surface. Perhaps you need to play on it to notice, or maybe only a defeated manager is able to spot the flaws in the surface.

Rangers have made the return to the top flight after four years spent working their way through the lower leagues.For that reason they are extremely unpredictable.Some say they will challenge for first, many think second would be a success and some even think a top half finish would be a decent season.

Kilmarnock, meanwhile have made a habit of flirting with relegation in recent seasons, with an appearance in the most recent relegation playoff the closest they have come.They survived the drop but there is pressure on Lee Clark to deliver more than simply staying up.

This made for an intriguing contest and early on the sides looked evenly matched. As the game settled in to a rhythm, the home side perhaps found themselves having the better chances.

After a sublime through ball Kris Boyd rolled back the years in the 29th minute to slot a cool finish past Foderingham in the Rangers goal.

The best chance of the half for the away side fell to marauding wing back James Tavernier who could only balloon the ball over the bar after some good work saw him one on one with Jamie MacDonald.

Those around me were content their team had started strongly, winning every tackle in midfield. Rangers were struggling.

The second half fairly quickly brought a moment of magic with Tavernier atoning for his earlier miss with a stunning free kick to level the scores at 1-1 on the hour mark.

Then a rush of blood to the head saw Kilmarnock reduced to 10 men after a wild sliding challenge on the disappointing Joey Barton.

As the end of the game approached Kilmarnock, led up front by (supreme athlete) Kris Boyd looked exhausted.

As the Rangers pressure grew Killie dropped deeper and deeper, defending desperately.However they managed to hold on much to the delight of the Kilmarnock fans around me.

Although times may have been hard at Rugby Park in recent years, the chants of “Lee Clark’s Blue and White Army” ringing around the ground at the end of the game didn’t hint at a divided support.

Maybe, just maybe, they’ve got a man in charge that they can rally behind at last.

Hippo says – a decent review that mentions issues that Killie fans have been talking about for ages. When a visitor picks up immediately on the poor ticketing arrangements and out of date messages it simply shows the club in a very poor light…..hopefully this is some of the simple stuff that will be remedied when the parasite goes once and for all.

As for the game itself I was just delighted that we took it to them, in the first half anyway. There is a tendency to pay teams way too much respect and anyone who watched the game will realise that Sevco are simply average like nearly everyone else in the league.

A DATE FOR THE DIARY OF ALL KILLIE FANS

SPFL 6/8/16 KILLIE 1 V 2 WELL KILLIE – MCDONALD, TAYLOR, S. SMITH, MCFADZEAN, ADDISON, BOYLE, DICKER, HAWKSHAW (JONES 61), KILTIE (M. SMITH 79), MCKENZIE (BOYD 48), COULIBALY SUBS NOT USED – DAVIES, WADDINGTON, BURN + COBAIN BOOKED – BOYLE GOALS – SMITH 81 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> MOTHERWELL – SAMSON, TAIT, HENEGHAN, MCMANUS, HAMMELL, AINSWORTH (MACLEAN 88), CADDEN, MCHUGH (CHALMERS 56), CLAY, JOHNSON, MCDONALD SUBS NOT USED – BRILL, THOMAS, FERGUSON, CAMPBELL + MACKIN BOOKED – HENEGHAN, MCHUGH + JOHNSON GOALS – SFA REF – C. THOMSON

CROWD - 4308

DICK OF THE DAY – THE PARASITE We were all fully aware of the horrendous start from last season when we were bullwhipped by Dundee. Everyone was praying that there was no repeat, well it was a slight improvement on that but it was still an opening day home defeat.

We have lots of time to change things on the park but it’s heartbreaking that the parasite is still here at the start of a new season. Ideally he would have been gone, new faces would have been on the board (including a Killie Trust person) and there may have been a new dawn. Sadly he still hangs around like a very bad smell and inflict daily damage to the club for every minute he remains.

Motherwell were no better than us but they got the first goal at a vital time and when they scored right at the start of the second half it was effectively game over. We battled well and may have sneaked a draw but it wasn’t to be….oh and the ref was a complete dick as well.

SPFL 13/8/16 ACCIES 1 V 2 KILLIE HAMILTON – MATTHEWS, LYON, DEVLIN, SARRIS, GILLESPIE, DOCHERTY, DONATI, CRAWFORD, IMRIE (ROY 84), D’ACOL (BROPHY 72), LONGRIDGE SUBS NOT USED – MACKINNON, WANT, BOYD, HUGHES + WOODS BOOKED – GILLESPIE GOALS – LONGRIDGE 26 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KILLIE – MCDONALD, TAYLOR, S. SMITH, BOYLE, ADDISON, DICKER, GREEN (COULIBALY 54), M. SMITH (MCFADZEAN 69), JONES (WADDINGTON 90), BOYD, MCKENZIE SUBS NOT USED – FINDLAY, HENSHALL, TAYLOR + FRIZZELL BOOKED – BOYLE, GREEN + MCKENZIE GOALS – BOYD 71 + COULIBALY 73 REF – S MCLEAN

CROWD - 2228

DICK OF THE DAY – THE BULLET We had a mighty fine near the end of last season in this fixture and even at this ridiculously early stage it seemed important to try and get a win over a potential relegation contender.

In all fairness it’s about our nearest away game so we generally just run up in the minibus and head home, this was a little different all the same. Our bus driver “The bullet” had another hire therefore the only way we could get him was to leave at 11am. It was a massive sacrifice but one that had to be made so we reached the Bay Horse before noon. It’s a cracking wee boozer and is run by the daughter of former Killie assistant manager, Gerry McCabe. The Bullet has to get the award though as his early departure meant I was pickled way earlier than usual!!

The game was nothing special but it changed with the introduction of Coulibaly in the second half. The wee man scored a goal of the season contender and what looked like being another bleak day turned into a welcome three points.

SPFL 20/8/16 STAGGIES 2 V 0 KILLIE ROSS CO. – FOX, CIKOS, QUINN, DAVIES, MCEVELEY, FRANKS (DINGWALL 86), WOODS, ROUTIS, GARDYNE (MORRISON 90), BOYCE, CURRAN (SCHALK 65) SUBS NOT USED – FRASER, MCSHANE, VAN DER WEG + MCCAREY BOOKED – DAVIES GOALS – BOYCE 29 + 74 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> KILLIE – MCDONALD, HENDRIE, S. SMITH, BOYLE, ADDISON (BURN 34), ADAMS (HAWKSHAW 67), GREEN (MCFADZEAN 56), M. SMITH JONES, BOYD, COULIBALY SUBS NOT USED – DAVIES, DICKER, BOJAJ + TAYLOR BOOKED – HENDRIE GOALS – NONE REF – N. WALSH

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DICK OF THE DAY – UPPER 5 RIGHT I will gladly give a million pounds to anyone who can guess the DOTD award without reading another word. Personally I don’t have a million quid but I’m sure my Troon lawyer friend will donate it from the money he has made from the club.We do look to give out some different and wacky awards but this probably beats the lot. Upper 5 right does not relate to a seat in the Ross County stand but in actual fact it is one of my teeth…..yes I had toothache all day.

I did attempt to kill the pain by my alcohol intake mixed with painkillers……no wonder I slept nearly all the way home. A visit to my dentist confirmed that upper 5 right was the problem all along, he will be replaced by a crown shortly!

Enough of my molars, the game was poor and it’s grim when the home keeper never had one save to make. Clark clearly is still trying to find his best eleven and he even started two new guys who only signed 24 hours earlier. Much like the Motherwell defeat, the opposition were nothing great but they didn’t have to be…….we must do much better than that or it’s another relegation battle.

SPFL 26/8/16 KILLIE 1 V 1 SEVCO KILLIE – MCDONALD, HENDRIE, TAYLOR, S. SMITH, BURN, BOYLE, DICKER, HAWKSHAW, KILTIE (GREEN 82), FRIZZELL (ADAMS 79), BOYD (COULIBALY 90) SUBS NOT USED – MACKAY, JONES, KAYODE + BOJAJ BOOKED – BOYLE, SMITH, HAWKSHAW + BOYD SENT OFF - TAYLOR GOALS – BOYD 29 >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> RANGERS – FODERINGHAM, TAVERNIER, WALLACE, KIERNAN, HILL, ROSSITER (KRANJCAR 58), MCKAY, BARTON (HALLIDAY 69), FORRESTER, DODOO (GARNER 15), MILLER SUBS NOT USED – GILKS, O’HALLORAN + HODSON BOOKED – FORRESTER + BARTON GOALS – TAVERNIER 59 REF – K. CLANCY

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DICK OF THE DAY – JOEY BARTON The parasite would have been delighted to see own team in town for the first time since there late cup win last season. It’s never a problem to find a dick on days like this, we have thousands to choose from. Lee Clark decided to give his Killie youngsters with Kiltie returning along with Taylor, Frizzell and Hawkshaw. The main talking point was the dismissal of young Taylor after a late challenge on scumbag Barton. It was a red card tackle but it’s hard to have sympathy with a guy who thinks its ok to stub out a cigar in someone’s eye…..I hope he never steps on the hallowed carpet again.

Killie played well and we were denied a penalty in the first half that may have given us an unassailable lead. We fought valiantly especially in the last half hour with ten men…….a decent point and hopefully something we can build on.

BITS + PIECES It seems like Lee Clark has set himself a target of buying a player a week as we continue to try out players on loan. Firstly welcome to Scott Boyd who we have signed on loan from Ross County for the rest of the season. With Addison missing for a couple of months it makes sense to add a bit of experience to our defence.

Heading the other way is Conrad Balatoni who has sadly decided to retire from football and sign for Trophy Free Central. His debut was lively as he scored an own goal then scored the winner at the other end. Personally I quite liked him as a player but he maybe had a bit of an attitude problem so he can go and disrupt the Killie Rejects Retirement home at Scumerset.

We have had a look at a couple of players who trained with us recently but there will be no deals for either Chris Burke or Leroy Lita. Don’t be surprised to see us being linked with others in the coming weeks although I will start to worry if we are linked with another right back!!

Along with big Addison we seem to be getting hit hard with injuries with McFadzean out for 2 – 3 months and Kiltie out for about a month. That is a real blow as he is fast becoming a key player in the team and his performance against Sevco was excellent. It seems he was maybe brought back a bit too quickly from his previous injury so lets make sure we don’t make the same mistake again.Charlee Adams was carried off after a bad challenge at dens Park and at the time of writing we are still waiting to hear the extent of his injury.

Finally we wish to send our condolences to Kris Boyd and all his family after the tragic loss of his young brother Scott. The poor guy was only 27 and the suffering must be horrendous for the whole family. It speaks volumes for Kris that he still wanted to play a few days later at Dens Park, that really is bravery and not something that everyone could do. It was also sadly ironic that loanee Scott Boyd was making his debut the same day.

R.I.P Scott

WALKING FOOTBALL

I’m sure you have all heard of walking football, the beautiful played by older and fatter men at waking pace. Gary Harkins is currently suing the organisers as he invented this snail influenced game long ago…….he’s got a watertight case to match his watertight shorts.