Hippo164

KILLIE HIPPO

AN UNOFFICIAL KILLIE FANZINE

ISSUE NO. 164

THE GOOD SHIP KILLIE!! . DAVID MORAN INTERVIEW . 10K SEASON TICKET HOLDERS? . DOUBLE SPEAK

£2.00

THE KILLIE HIPPO IS ON SALE AT HOWARD ARMS, GLENCAIRN SQUARE, KILMARNOCK FOG’S SNACK BAR, ANNANDALE IND. ESTATE, KILMARNOCK KA1 2RS KILLIE TRUST DESK (AVOID PARK HOTEL FOR HOME GAMES) MATCH DAYS AT RP + AT ALL AWAY GAMES HUGE THANKS TO ALL ADVERTISERS, SUBSCRIBERS, DISTRIBUTORS AND KILLIE FANS FOR THEIR SUPPORT.

All views expressed are those of the contributors.

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SHOOTING FROM THE HIPPO Welcome to issue 164 of our world famous glamour mag, well it’s glamorous to those who like fat boy gags, poor grammar and juvenile humour. I rally must apologise for those who like the match reports and DOTD awards however we have just had too much to pack into this issue and I’m afraid something had to be dropped. Don’t despair as we will be back with more dicks than ever is issue 165…which will be out for the home game versus Dundee on Dec. 3rd.

Unsurprisingly this issue is full of all the off field nonsense that finally appears to be capturing the imagination of a few papers. Since the last issue we have lost another director with Russel Smith reportedly walking away as he was fed up with the lack of movement within the boardroom. You can take it as read that Russel wanted shot of MJ like the rest of us but he chosen to take the same route as Jim Mann and David Moran before him. There have been some rumours that there were other reasons, we will do some digging and let you know if we uncover any scandal!

Talking of David Moran the former director very kindly agreed to answer the fans questions and you will find an excellent Q + A in this issue. David is brutally honest with his view and as a genuine Killie fan you can sense his frustration with everything that is going on at the moment. Thanks again to David and who knows he may even be back in the boardroom one day.

So just what is happening at the moment? My understanding is that MJ is digging his heels in more than ever and is looking for an obscene amount of money, There were stories that Billy Bowie was back on side with Johnston however that appears to be wide of the mark. The problem is that BB has never came out and spoken to the fans so at long as that is the case there will always be rumours getting fired about. The QTS statement was very welcome and it really does seem to be MJ against everyone with the SLO being his only obvious ally. There has also been a story that BB and john Kiltie may just walk away and leave MJ to wither and die. Sadly that would mean a calamitous administration event but it well come to that.You will see an article in here with a proposal Bowie and the investors showing how we could maybe get many of the missing thousands back once he has gone. It may well be wishful thinking but I do think, that once the parasite goes, there is a massive opportunity to rally the whole community and get that feelgood factor back that has been missing for many years. Keep the faith folks and please join in any protests that are arranged.

Sandy

DAVID MORAN INTERVIEW The shambles that is the boardroom at the Theatre of Lies shows no sign of putting itself right any time soon. Our campaign for change a few years back did result in new faces joining the parasite although it wasn’t perfect as Bowie inexplicably chose to prop up Johnston…..a decision that he must hugely regret by now.

However it was an improvement on the one man dictatorship and the new guys that remain are the ones best placed to get rid of the black cloud that continues to float above our famous old ground. The departure rate from the boardroom is matched only by that of the key positions in the club and outwith the shop I don’t think I know anyone. It’s all changed days from when the likes of Anne Clark worked there for years showing true loyalty to the club that she loves.

The boardroom departures in recent times have seen chairman Jim Mann do his best but ultimately head back down south. David Moran came on along with Russel Smith, both genuine Killie fans who invested in shares and joined the board in the belief they could halt our decline. They gave it their best shot but realised the parasite has manipulated the whole structure of the club in a way that makes it very difficult for anyone to make a significant difference……unless they pay him an obscene amount of money of course.

1 Why has MJ never been voted off the board? a. The board can only remove a director if they have the backing of 70% of shareholders in writing. MJ own 40% so impossible b. It takes an EGM for shareholders to vote a director off the board and it takes 5% of shareholders with a valid reason to call an EGM. c. Trying to get 5% to legally meet the requirements to call and EGM is not easy when the board hold about 92% of the total shares. d. Even at an EGM Billy Bowie hold the key to any vote. e. Even if BB voted against MJ, MJ could fight in the courts to stay on to protect his “investment,” (no sniggering).

2.

Why does KFC not use another solicitors firm?

a. That baffles me and I would suspect that MJ signed a contract with himself before when he held 87% of shares that ties us to him. b. I was never given access to all the pre-existing contracts despite asking several times. c. I have no dies what notice period might be on any of these contracts. d. An example of an onerous contract in football would be the Sports Direct contract at Ibrox with a 7 year notice period. e. Certainly an equation for the next AGM or and EGM. That’s where the Ibrox contracts were uncovered.

3.

What was your main reasons for leaving the board

a. I was not willing to invest the second traunch of my investment while MJ remained on the board. b. That meant I had to resign.

4.

What in your opinion will it take to remove MJ from a position of power at KFC?

a. b. c.

Money or the potential future loss of it.

A criminal conviction.

Death.

5. If there is no gagging order why haven't you told the other side of the story to the press to counteract the spin from MJ? I have told anyone that wants to listen. I’m glad Hippo has given me this opportunity.

6. What were you thinking?

I ask myself the same question. I really thought that MJ would sit back and let others grow his investment. I totally underestimated the lengths that he would go to keep control. I believed that I could help turn the club PR around and get the fans back behind a progressive fan focused board. I was wrong.

7. Do you know the current relationship between Bowie and MJ ?

They are business partners. Anything beyond that baffles me.

8. What percentage if any will the bank take from MJs money from selling his shares in Kilmarnock Football Club if the sale takes place before 2019 and is this the reason he won't sell before then, or is there something else keeping him hanging on?

I have no idea but it will be enough for him to not risk it. A big payday is all that keeps him hanging on. He will wait as long as it takes.

9. Have you seen any evidence that supports MJ's claim that the club could face a financial penalty if he leaves before 2019?

I have seen no evidence to support this. The bank are silent on this (I have contacted them) and everyone else in between is bound by confidentiality agreements. Only MJ seems willing to talk about it and nobody can contradict what he says. …..just as he likes it.

10. Has MJ ever told a blatant lie?

That would need to be legally proved and he would fight the accusation. He is extremely careful with what he says. A statement with 1% truth can be argued as being not untrue. He is the king of double speak.

11. Can you confirm what YNTTK has said, about an e-mail from MJ, which contains names of potential investors and what they are willing to invest?

I have not seen the email however I have emails from investors with pledges of over £1.2m if MJ is gone. MJ always claimed that they were just pledges and not real. I looked these people in the eye and I know it was real money.

12. Did due diligence throw up any concerns when you were initially investing?

No it didn’t and I suspect if I had been more intrusive I wouldn’t have learned any more but might have pulled out.

13. Did the board support MJ when taking action against Brownings re Killie branding and / or is he pursuing personal vendettas using the clubs money?

I can confirm John Galls statement that during my time another director negotiated commercial terms with Browning for an extended period of supply of catering services.

If it had been my company I would have signed it personally but it did not get signed. That is as much as I know. I am still at a loss as to why it wasn’t signed.

I personally think that some people over estimate the value of the Killie Pie Brand outside of Killie.

14. Do you think Johnston is deliberately trying to kill the club?

Absolutely not. You don’t kill the golden goose. It was once claimed that Mike Ashley just needed an Ibrox club to have a faint pulse and no more.

MJ just needs us alive until payday.

15. Can you set the fat **** up so he bumps into me on a dark night with no witnesses?

It’s a small town and the nights are fair drawing in 16 What are the issues surrounding the validity or not if the request for an EGM? Does everyone legally own their shares, has everyone given full legal permission for me to use their shares, have the Trust and Mauchline KSA met their constitutional obligations. Time consuming faffing that just delays everything.

17. How the f**k do we get rid of Michael Johnston preferably without going him any more than a quid?

When I came in I was in the camp that he had earned the right to a reasonable payday. He had done the vey unenviable job of stripping out cost to keep us alive.

We had the chance to rebuild in 2014 and if he had sat back and let others run the club better I would not have grudged him a pay day.

However he has managed to get half the hotel, has held us back and now wants a pay day that in my opinion is grossly unreasonable.

18. Is it true that you were the original "Cyril the Squirrel" in the midnineties and if so, does this make you the first man in football history to go from mascot to board room?

I helped Chalky White out once and was Cyril on the pitch before Skol Cup tie vs Hibs in 1992.

19. Do you believe billy Bowie has the clubs best interests at heart and do you believe he wants rid of Johnston?

He wants the club to do well but doesn’t want to run a football club.

He didn’t want MJ out when I was there but surely he sees the issue now. He can’t keep propping the club up waiting for MJ’s payday.

If he has offered MJ what we have read then he must be pretty unsulted that MJ has knocked him back. I am and it’s not my money.

20. Does the board operate on a one member, one vote system on all matters? If so, did that apply to the CEB member when one sat on the board?

Yes but votes that MJ might lose are avoided because he doesn’t take kindly to other people telling him how to run the club.

21. What happened to the CEB? Good question. What was the point? If it was a condition of the bank deal why is it less important to maintain than preserving MJ on the board.

Picking and choosing?

22. Were the remote directors - Mann, Smith and yourself - ever "surprised" by business decisions made in your absence?

I’ll speak for myself. Yes, too often for my liking. I didn’t want a hands on role and to be consulted on every decision but I was surprised at some of the minor things I was extensively updated on by MJ while other arguably more important decisions were taken by MJ with less consultation.

23 What were your reasons for becoming a Director, and backing for a short time the reign of MJ ......

At no point did I back the “reign” of MJ. Right from the start I expected him to step back and wait quietly for his pay day. I believed that I could help turn the club PR around and get the fans back behind a progressive fan focused board.

I believed that MJ would step back and that I could get others to invest much more than I could so we could appoint a full time CEO instead of an executive chairman. I was wrong.

24 What given your experience are the reasons why MJ still holds on to power and defeats any opposition ..is it just the voting and legal structure he has developed over time.......surely experienced business people could find a loophole or other way of manouvering his exit. Be that even accepting a payoff?

He is able to legally challenge everything. He has the time and the resources to do this inexpensively. Taking him on takes time and money to legally challenge everything he has built to protect himself.

He has created layer upon complex layer of protection that we need to peel them back one by one. Each time one is removed another is reveled. It can seem endless.

He does not need to win anything just avoid losing until payday has come and gone. It’s like parking the bus and not needing to score a winner.

25 How do you see the boardroom situation panning out between now and the end of the season?

It is difficult to see a solution we want. I want an EGM to remove him but really that’s pie in the sky without Billy Bowie wanting it to happen so the ball is in Billy’s court.

It is difficult for him because at the end of the day they are partners whether they like it or not.

MJ’s statement 2 weeks ago in response to the KFCSA petition talked the club financial position making it appear like he was doing a great job.

If QTS confirm publicly that they will pull out if MJ stays then MJ cannot defend his position. He would absolutely be blocking and negatively impacting company revenues.

26 Why did you think the hotel deal was good for the club?

The hotel sale was great for the Club. Selling it to BB in return for a £9m debt was great business. What I didn't like was that BB sold MJ 47% of it for way less than he should have. That was a bad deal for BB but it has also turned out to be a bad deal for us. If BB had got a lot more of the club for the 47% of hotel shares or given MJ less of the hotel then he might be in a better position to remove MJ today. If we look at the full deal and ask who did well out of it. MJ's gains far exceed everyone else and he didn't part with a penny to get it.

27 Do you think MJ wants to shut the club and sell the land for houses.

Absolutely not. The hotel's revenue is not from hungry thirsty residents it is only viable next to a football stadium. Without RP the hotel would be dead in weeks. The hotel needs the club more than the club needs the hotel. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Hippo says – first and foremost we would like to extend huge thanks to David for being so open and honest in answering the fans questions. I should add that the majority of the questions were from the forums on the all conquering killiefc.com,a website that is more popular, more professional and in a different league to the rubbish put out by the club.

David has answered a lot of the questions that fans have been asking over the years and I hope his inside knowledge adds a bit of credibility to the stuff that we have known has been going on for years. The one thing that nobody can really say is how is this all going to end. David is right in saying that bowie is the key to the whole situation. Bowie helped create the whole mess by propping up Johnston when he should have been getting on board with the other consortium at the time. There is a chance that he can get himself back in the good books by playing hard ball with Bowie and doing everything in his power to make MJ’s life hell. Take away the legal work, bump him as Company Secretary and get rid of his SLO buddy who appears to be Johnston’s ally at the club now.

Thanks again David and there may be a place for you back at the club once the parasite can bleed us dry no more.

CAN WE GET 1OK S.T. HOLDERS WHEN HE GOES? Firstly let me clarify that I am writing this article at 5.30pm on a Sunday afternoon having not consumed one drop of alcohol throughout the day. You may question my mental state of health but many have been doing that for many years now. As the title above asks, once MJ goes how realistic is it to try and get 10,000 season ticket holders?

I appreciate there is are numerous scenarios that can happen in the months ahead at our club and nobody can accurately predict how it will all pan out. We’ve written enough in this issue about the current issues so I thought it was time to plan for a way to attract back the missing fans once MJ has left the building.

Picture the scene, MJ has gone and several high profile and successful businessmen have pledged a seven figure investment ….everyone is feeling positive for the first time in years. The obvious and glaring problem is that thousands have vanished during the MJ years and you would need to be totally naïve to believe they will all stampede back as soon as he goes.

The reality is that most will have found new ways to spend their Saturday afternoons and it is going to take something truly special to get them all back…..as well as a few thousand more.

Well here is my proposal and I have sent this to both current directors and to a couple of the known investors to gauge their feelings on the viability of our idea.

My understanding is that our forecasted income for ST sales is around £400k. The first thing to be done is to speak to an investor who is happy to underwrite any shortfall to ensure that £400k is the minimum amount received. Once that is agreed we launch a groundbreaking ST deal as follows: ADULT TICKETS - £50

KIDS UNDER 16 - £1

Your first reaction to that is that it is a non starter but lets stop and have a wee think. If we go huge on publicity and tour all the pubs, clubs, towns and villages with a roadshow I have no doubt we could get a huge take up.

The game has to be affordable to all and I’m sure this deal would just about cover everyone. Of course many fans will still be happy to pay £300 so you can have any amount of add ons like match programme – extra £40, lotto membership extra £52, sponsor a player extra £350. The detail can be discussed at length but the key thing I that a basic adult ST is available for £50.

I would also put an onus on fans to act as agents as such and get as many friends and family signed up as possible. We all know someone who has stopped going so with the parasite out of the way and the best ST in history launched they may just fancy getting back into the match day habit.

There is the obvious issue of reduced walk ups but let’s be honest, how many of them are there these days. We must think longer term and priority is to get as many fans through the gates as possible. I’ll report in the next issue what response we get from the directors and investors.

DOUBLE SPEAK Ever since I got involved with the fans groups I’ve been of the opinion that you should never believe a word that comes out the parasite’s mouth. He tries to be clever and basically does the same as most politicians…..he talks constant “double speak”. He doesn’t come out with blatant lies but he simply doesn’t tell the whole truth.

You have to analyse every word that he says then try and work out what it really means…..NEVER take what he says at face value. There’s no doubt he is under increasing pressure, he has aged 50 years in the last 10 and now he has stopped attending games. It’s important that the fans play their full part in keeping the pressure on and a bit of strong leadership and direction from the KFCSA is badly needed.

It’s good to see that some of the papers are eventually picking up on the story, I’m sure if one investigative journalist took the time to delve into the whole thing he may find there is a story or two to be told.

Anyway we had to put our analytical skills to full use when the poison came out to reply to the QTS withdrawal threats in a recent newspaper article. We have put the full article below showing what MJ said followed by what we think he really means: “I would consider my position if somebody wanted to buy my shares but nobody wants to buy my shares.

Nobody wants to buy my shares at the unreasonable price I want to sell at.

“These things start with talking and then it moves to a more formal written proposal. That hasn’t happened.

I have talked to several people about selling my shares but always piss them off with endless talking and delays that I believe are good negotiation tactics.

“I know there is a lot of inaccurate material being put into the public domain. There is no offer of investment in any formal sense and, likewise, no formal legal offer to buy my shares.

I know that the offers that I have received have made their way into the press and I am pissed off about this so will now try to discredit those individuals.

I’ve had talks with people – but nobody has made an offer capable of acceptance to buy my shares. That has happened a number of times over the years. “ I will repeat myself because I want you to believe what I am saying. This was a technique made famous by Bill Clinton in the 90’s and used by Tony Blair extensively.

“I have talked to people and I have given them financial information.

I would like you to believe that I have gone out of my way to help investors complete due diligence but I will not reveal just how much or little I have helped.

“They speak about buying shares, either by way of new share capital in the company or buying my shares, but nothing of a formal nature comes out of it.

I am so difficult to deal with nothing ever gets to the formal process.

“It’s not unusual but it has been reported that I was made an offer of a large sum of money. There has been no such offer. Those are the two major issues.

I will repeat myself again. Perhaps I can go on the conference tour with Clinton and Blair.

“The question of me blocking new investment – and that is not true because there is no formal offer – and me turning down a substantial sum of money for my shares which is not true because there isn’t an offer of any formal or legal nature.”

Clinton and Blair have nothing on me.

On the sponsorship position, Johnston said: “QTS have been fantastic sponsors and have assured me they will remain as sponsors until at least the end of the season. “Hopefully, we can advance discussions with that and QTS will remain in place.”

These are not the drones you are looking for!

And Johnston also defended himself against accusations that he is damaging the club.

He said: “It’s extremely disappointing when you have invested 14 years in running the football club, during which time I eliminated £13million worth of debt that I inherited in 2005.

I operated as a self-imposed administrator but did not charge as much as an actual administrator would have charged. You should be eternally grateful that I only earned a decent living from this.

“I’m struggling to see where I personally have let the club down.

The fact that the club has gone backwards since March 2014 and the fact that I have significantly improved my personal position despite hindering the investment that could have delivered a much brighter financial position should be ignored.

“I was able to get the debt-restructuring deal across the line in March 2014. We then put in place a proper board of directors. It was four, then five, now three.

The bank were only willing to do a deal that reduced my shareholding. I created a very complex deal that I was willing to accept because it significantly benefited me. LGB through Grant Thornton spent considerable time talking to BB and other potential investors coming up with multiple options for me but I just wasn’t willing to accept them because I needed to protect my nest egg.

Finally I found a deal that hit the jackpot.

“We’ve had a board of directors running the company since March 2014, not me on my own. The notion which is being put about that I’m running the show and making decisions to advance some agenda is untrue and unfounded.

Since March 2014 I have played a blinder. I have done a brilliant job of making the board impotent by being the most awkward person that ever sat on a board. I’ve seen off 3 of them and managed to make it look like they couldn’t hack it. I struggle to keep my underwear dry when I think about it.

“It’s disappointing but I’ve learned to deal with it as opposed to getting involved in slanging matches.

I think I may have leaked a little pee.

“I don’t want to do anything to harm the club. I got involved in 2005 because the alternative was the club going into administration which may have led to liquidation.

I need the club to have a pulse. I need my brown trousers when I think of losing my nest egg.

“So I saw the possibility of saving the club and that’s what I did. My objective was to eliminate the debt, keep the club in the top division and look after the employees.

I am more NAPM than Hippo, it’s ironic I know but the survival of this club means as much to me than him. It’s my pension.

Hippo says – we have listened to his nonsense for far too long and the translation above really does reflect his style of misleading fans whilst trying to stay “legal”.

With regards “blatant lies” the most disgusting was at a meeting I attended with several other fan reps. Alan Robertson had come to the Trust and explained cut backs were being made hence the fifty for the future campaign was started to save the youths. MJ said he had lied at the time and there had been no need to raise funds….what a lovely way to treat your loyal fans.

FUNNY FOOTBALL CHANTS Many football chants are wide and varied from the bigoted and despicable to the genuinely funny. This issue is way too serious so I thought we needed a wee bit of a laugh. A guy just tweeted that fans were having a laugh at the expense of Dagenham keeper Elliot Justham by singing “ you’re just a sh*t tesco sandwich”.

Inspired by this we trawled t’internet and came up with this top 10 funny chants from a couple of years back: 1 "His name is Rio and he watches from the stand" Rio Ferdinand faced this chant after he was banned for missing a drugs test in 2003, sung to the tune of 'Rio' by Duran Duran.

2 "When you're sat in row Z, and the ball hits your head,that's Zamora, that’s Zamora.

Fulham supporters on former goal-shy striker Bobby Zamora, sung to the tune of Dean Martin's 'That's Amore' 3 "You should have stayed on the telly" Alan Shearer suffered this chant when he stopped working on Match of the Day to take charge of Newcastle, but wasn't able to save them from being relegated 4. "He's fast, he's red, he talks like Father Ted, Robbie Keane" Liverpool fans salute their striker.

5. "Your teeth are offside, your teeth are offside, Luis Suarez, your teeth are offside" Manchester United fans singing about Liverpool forward Luis Suarez's large gnashers.

6. "Deep fry yer pizzas, we're gonna deep fry yer pizzas" Scotland fans made this threat against Italy's cuisine in a Fifa World Cup qualifier in March 2007.

7. "Chelsea, wherever you may be, keep your wife from John Terry" Sung to the tune of 'Lord of the Dance', Chelsea fans salute their Captain after his affair with former team-mate Wayne Bridge's ex-girlfriend.

8. "John Carew, Carew. He likes a lap-dance or two. He might even pay for you. John Carew, Carew" Sung to the tune of 'Que Sera Sera' by Doris Day, this was the Villa fans' tribute to their player after he was caught visiting a gentlemen's club in 2008.

9. "Fat Eddie Murphy, you're just a fat Eddie Murphy" The Newcastle United fans heckling Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink back in his Chelsea day.

10. "You only live round the corner" Fulham fans sing to Manchester United supporters during their 2-0 win in the 2008/9 season.

HOW GOOD WAS EREMENKO? I’m writing this the day after the fantastic demolition of the hammer throwing jambos and it’s fair to say I’ve still got a buzz…….no it’s not the lager! It really was a superb and totally unexpected performance however it was very very welcome and that’s the players set the standard on which they will be judged from now on. You could see what it meant to Lee Clark at the end of the game and that is just over a quarter of the way into the season.

Every Killie fan I spoke to after the game was on a high and back at Howard HQ we got talking about recent managers and how Clark would compare. It goes without saying that very little time was spent discussing the last two bosses. It would be fair to say that the reason we were so hyper about the Hearts win was partly down to the fact that we have had to endure huge dollops of mince over the last few years.

Of course prior to that we had King Kenny who was treated disgracefully but it’s good to see him taking Derry into Europe in his first season back in his homeland. The main topic of discussion all the same was big Mixu, the flying Finn (should that be frying Finn?) made a huge impression in a short space of time and had us playing some of the finest football we have had the pleasure to witness at the Theatre of Lies. The discussion turned to Mixu’s style of play and the players who made it happen and the simple question is “How good was Eremenko?

Losa is something of a hero at Killie and even recently on a short visit to Scotland he gave an interview and was waxing lyrical about the club and its fans……maybe not the fat lawyer all the same. We just watched killie beat a bang average hearts team and Connor Sammon was the main striker in hearts line up. The big man is a gent and always has a nice word or two to say about Killie however it could be argued that his best days as a player were at Killie and the main reason for that, without a doubt was Eremenko.

It took Sammon a while to find his feet here but once he realized his runs would be picked out by the talented Eremenko he was off and running.

I suppose Eremenko is much more this season as we do not have one remotely creative central midfielder on our books. The reason we see so much “back to front” football is simply because we don’t have the players in midfield who can take the ball, keep it for periods of time and use it sensibly to bring others into the game. Apart from Sammon the likes of Jamie Hamill and Ben Gordon were benefitting from the vision and superb passing ability of Eremenko. Again I would argue that it was probably the best that those two guys have played in their whole career and without him on the park they were far less effective especially when bombing forward.

Don’t get me wrong, Eremenko was a huffy character and when things weren’t going his way he would get into a strop and shout at team mates or lunge at opponents……great entertainment. It would be fair to say that Killie, in their entire history, have had very few players who were as naturally talented as Losa. His pinpoint passing, quick turns and sublime goals were a joy to behold and if he was in better physical shape he really could have played at a truly high level, yes even higher than Scotland’s oldest professional team.

I really do think that Eremenko was key to everything that Mixu did and I wonder if his time at Killie would have so fondly remembered if he hadn’t succeeded in enticing him to Rugby Park. Eremenko’s second spell probably wasn’t as memorable but that was probably due to worse players around him. Lets not forget the excellent Bryson was beside him before and the wee man would have walked into any team in the country in my opinion.

Jumping back to Mixu you maybe read before in the Hippo that we had it in good authority that he was lined up for a return here. Last season we travelled up to Tannadice in September in the middle of a bad run of results.

Locke was under increasing pressure and I was assured that had we lost on the day Locke was a goner and Mixu was ready to step in. We carried a bit of luck that day and with the help of Jamie McDonald and a late McHattie screamer we won 2 – 1 which bought the manager another few months.

Having seen Mixu’s failed spell at Tannadice it may well be we dodged a bullet. It’s all ifs and buts really but I look back with great fondness to Eremenko’s time at RP and yes I do think he really was that good.

THE NAUGHTY LIST We have had the complete misfortune to have dealt with the parasite over a number of years now and we know there are a few things that consistently get his back up. Any mention of the taxman gets him jittery and offhand so maybe that is something we will pursue in the future.

The mere mention of Baz or me gets his fat face turning a bright shade of red plus any questions about the bank deal sees the smug grin vanish off his dish.

However the one thing that gets him seething is the so called naughty list. I genuinely don’t know exactly where and when it started however if it noises up the plum I’m happy to put it in the fanzine. Many fans have asked to see it so here goes however it doesn’t appear to have been updated for a few years……it would take a two folk about a year to get it properly updated”” Anyway here’s the infamous “naughty list” for all those who requested it: • SPL vote on Rangers. Johnston went to public meeting, saw unanimous vote against them, ran his own ‘vote’ and manipulated the figures to claim that only 36% of Killie fans wanted Rangers punished. Then abstained on vote and brought shame to the club’s fans among their peers.

• Young Killie. Allowed them to run autonomous for years and then stepped in to claim the money they made which was reported as the sole profit (£11k) of the club for 2012. Mismanaged the Disclosure Scotland forms and coaches went unqualified. Threatened legal action if they broke away and used the name Young Killie. Threatened to expose them for not having the very disclosures that the club themselves failed to process. They’ve since broke away and got all relevant documentation sorted within two weeks - and the club has lost direct input to 500 kids, 50 coaches and their families.

• Rangers winning the league at Rugby Park. Shop assistants told to sell ticket indiscriminately, lip service given to names being taken from fans (M.Mouse etc).

Ignored warnings by fans groups that it was getting out of hand.

Rangers fans openly entering Killie end on the day displaying colours, police telling fans it was down to the chairman. Fans threatened in their own seats by Rangers fans and having to leave with kids etc. after five minutes.

Chairman subsequently claiming in the press that it was the fans fault and that we were the ones who had sold out tickets to Rangers fans.

• Celtic winning the league at Rugby Park. Fans agreed to give up stands so Rangers problems couldn’t happen again. Celtic fans even in the one stand designated to Killie were not moved.

Club giving Celtic free reign with the PA system to play their “party tunes” and celebrate winning the league, while they smashed up hundreds of chairs in the process. This on top of a previous occasion when violence was rife and Killie fans were not adequately protected.

• Cessation of all communication with fans groups. Informing the KFCSA and Killie Trust that they would not co-operate with them until such times as they replaced their democratically elected chairman.

• Club AGM. Refusing to even put Any Other Competent Business on the agenda for the second year running and then subsequently refusing to answer any questions on the night until forced to by angry fans...told fans that "the pies would get cold" then gave glib and uninformative answers claiming that the shareholders were already told more than he needed to tell them.

• Sacking the manager of the hotel and taking the job on himself with no previous or relevant experience. Giving a family member a lucrative job as events manager at the hotel despite them also not having any previous experience or qualifications and the hotel losing a lot of business as a result (too many tales of woe to mention).

• Ticketing fiasco where Celtic fans are offered cheaper tickets than home fans.

Lying about there always being a deal on the cards for Killie fans despite irrefutable proof to the contrary.

• Kenny Shiels. Sacking a popular manager who delivered a League Cup and a vision for the future through youth development when fans were not even calling for change.

Dubious reasoning for the sacking and the manner in which it was carried out was an embarrassment to all Killie fans. It would appear to have been done to appease the SFA/SPL in Johnston’s attempt to curry favour and get a job.

• Alienation of sponsors. How many sponsors boards and main sponsors have we lost in Johnston’s time in charge? Too many to mention and most leaving due to their treatment by the chairman, courted until they parted with their cash and then ignored or squeezed for more.

• Denial of takeover offers. As has since been proved there were at least two legitimate offers on the table for the club in 2002 and 2012 which Johnston denied even existed, lying to the supporters about it.

• Looking for substantial remuneration for a majority shareholding which was given to him for £1 and ergo stopping any serious investment in the club. Also claiming for seven years solid that it was impossible to have any new members on the board due to the structure of the debt...which suddenly does not seem to be the case now he is desperate to do a deal with the bank to stay in charge.

• Management committee set up to ‘advise’ him was no more than a sham.

Previous members quoted as leaving when asked to decide what soup to have in the boardroom and having their advice on serious matters completely ignored.

How many have come and gone? The majority whom have left had intimated that they could not work with Johnston and some are even owed sums of money.

• Youth development to be abandoned at Rugby Park and club coaches approaching Killie Trust to try and help with funds to keep it going. Ironically this is the same youth system which produced Steven Naismith whose transfer kept the club in business.

The Trust worked tirelessly to bring in a significant six figure sum over the years only to be told in 2012 that the money was “never needed” and that the club had just told us that to get cash in. Astonishingly asked to contribute again this year.

• Drop in attendance. The attendance at Rugby Park which were always the best in the country for a provincial club have dropped by over 50% in Johnston’s time as chairman.

This is for a variety of reasons but most of which can be attributed to the chairman and his failure to market the club properly (alienating many due to the points raised here) and not the closing of Massey Ferguson last century as was recently blamed.

We’ve had low averages before but now we are eating into the hard core and they are staying away for one reason and that is Michael Johnston.

• Community involvement. Michael Johnston’s version of community ownership where he still retains the majority shareholding and total control. There are still occasions when the players etc. go out to hospitals and schools but it is a fraction of what we should be doing and we are losing the club as a heart of the community.

• Commercial ineptitude. Its one thing to piss off your fans constantly but another to deliver sub-standard service and products and still expect to make a profit on them. The various disasters with replica strips down the years are just an example of this. Commercial department fighting a losing battle, Johnston hurting them more than any recession.

• Paying the bills. Or not as the case may be. A host of local businesses who have struggled to get paid in time or in some cases at all and even some who claim to have been threatened with court if they pursue what is owed to them.

Not good for business and not good for relations in the community once again...many well respected business people no longer want to be associated with the club as long as Johnston is at the helm.

• Current debt level. The most recent figure we have is from 17 months ago and every year it appears that we have to rely on some trick or another to make the books seem presentable, if in doubt write off some Moffat debt...where is Jamie now?

• Assets. The valuation of our assets are ridiculously high given what they are worth in real terms and the figures being bandied about concerning debt reduction have not factored in the assets that we have sold. Players will always move on, every club in Scotland is a “selling club” but the other assets we’ve sold have not realised their full potential.

It has been reported by at least one building firm that they were higher bidders for the flats contract that Manor Kingdom. The bungalow was also never marketed publicly so the potential value was never reached there either.

• Neglect of Youth System. Paul McDonald being moved and not being replaced as a community coach, this after the sacking of Alan Mahood who was also a community coach. Under 20’s teams told to bring their own packed lunches to games instead of their nutrition being looked after by the club.

Youth coaches being asked to find thier own sponsors and to fund a lot of their efforts themselves and through the kids parents...boy’s club teams can offer boys more than we can.

• Media gaffs where the chairman accuses our fans at away games of letting the club down, also constantly having a go at the fans and their elected leaders in the press and blaming them for his problems instead of trying to solve anything.

Publicly slating the Trust for taking events away from the club when the hotel has been pre-booked by someone else.

• Lack of investment. We have a chairman who had never been to a football match before he was 50 years old, had to ask what colours we played in and has never paid into a game in his life. Each and every fan at Rugby Park who has even once paid into a game has actually invested more than the chairman has.

He puts the hours in to safeguard his own wellbeing and income, it is not for the good of the club.

• Supporters’ Liason Officer, or lack of one. Temporarily carried out by John Corrigan who was appointed by Johnston when most clubs in Europe get the fans to elect one. His role never amounted to anything because at every turn he was powerless to do anything because at the end of the day Johnston alone was pulling the strings…he has since left out of frustration.

• Fans Charter - completely ignored by the club who are meant to responds to any reasonable question by a fan within two working weeks. Johnston has had a legal document on his desk for over four months from the Trust for four months at the last count and has failed to respond, he alleged in the media that was because their lawyer was “ill” when in fact he was off work for a total of three days. Still not acted on it months after being asked by the press.

• Killie gym and ‘97 Club. Johnston’s refusal to have discussion with various fans regards some decision made about the hotel have resulted in them giving up membership of said gym which has also decimated the pre-match ‘97 club and put an end to many player and match sponsorships.

• Fun Run. The gym organised a fun run which wasn’t popular. The Trust were asked to publicise it and the funds raised were to be channeled through the Fifty for the Future initiative which aided youth development. The Trust did this and were then told the money would not be forthcoming.

• K-Step. An initiative to take Killie into primary schools through the medium of education. The Trust won a cash award on the back of how successful it proved to be. The club withrdrew support of this and it has been on hold ever since.

• Christmas Shop. The Trust arranged to hire and pay for premises in the town centre for the club to operate out of over the festive period but the club withdrew at the eleventh hour citing it wasn’t the location they preferred.

• Club legends. Showing severe disrespect to club legends like Davie Sneddon, Ray Montgomerie and Garry Hay, again too many instances and people to relate.

• Financial skullduggery. How else can recently reported events be described? A company called the Park Hotel Ayrshire Ltd set up with Billy Bowie (who has still not been registered as a director at the club) as the sole director. Should the hotel be split from the club at any point and the club left with the toxic debt then it could not go to a company that shares a director with the club.

No logical explanation forthcoming for this, it all seems very suspect. Also business people being approached to "invest" in the club but their money to be held in an escrow account so they can get it back if the club goes into administration.

• Trying to trademark Killie and the pie-gate fiasco with John Gall/Brownings.

THE PERFECT XMAS GIFT

As fanzine editor I can stick in whatever I want and when it comes to helping a good pal it’s a no brainer. The lovely Debs is a talented lass and she has been making up these great wee personalized frames for more and more folk. Just provide the names to Debs and she will get you sorted for the perfect Xmas pressie and they are cheap as chips…….mmmmmmm chips.

Small frames £10

Medium frame £12.50

Large frame £15.

Grandparents with the names of their grandkids is especially popular but Debs will get anything done for you. To order a frame drop Debs an e-mail debs1983@hotmail.com or text me on 07747718754 and I can pass on your details. Orders will be ready in a few days and delivery can be arranged.