Putting together this album has been a complete labour of love. Not just for Derrick but for myself as well. As the sole owner of a record label I'm used to a lot of tasks falling onto my shoulders; usually artwork and/or layout related; but, whilst every release is important to me, not every release is an artist's fifteen-years-in-themaking début LP. Having seen the sheer amount of passion and energy Derrick has poured into this – and everything he does for that matter – we had to ensure that the package you hold in your hands does this album justice. Derrick suggested some sort of bonus zine which, through various conversations, became this very photo/interview zine. Given the fact I used to write a punk zine called Kill Your Own – in fact, Derrick and I originally met when I ended up interviewing him at a Sam Russo show for the very first issue – Derrick insisted that I interview him here, and that nothing is off limits. I hope this interview goes some way to explain the process behind the album, and I hope my questions were what Derrick was after. Ian Perry owner, Aaahh!!! Real Records March – April 2018
We're doing this on the day that both Stephen Hawking and Jim Bowen passed away. Any thoughts on the two of them? Stephen Hawking was undeniably one of the greatest minds of our generation, an utter inspiration and someone who'll be greatly missed. Indeed, he's one of the “greatest minds alive today” referenced in the lyric to The Final Intervention. As a scientist and exploratory mind, he was a rare wonder. As a human being, he was an inspiration. I remember watching a decent number of Bullseye episodes as a kid; I can't shake the image of a distraught Bully refusing to believe that Jim has gone, makes me super sad. They both lived rich and fulfilling lives, in very different ways. I don't think ye can ask for any more than that really. And now, questions actually about yourself that you've likely answered before: why the name Tragical History Tour? Tragical History Tour is a shitty joke name, and it wasn't even my joke! My old band, 13 Broken Fingers, couldn't make a show at The Yard in Stirling one night back in 2003. My partner at the time knew that I'd been writing all these acoustic songs, as I'd started going to open mics a couple of years previously, and she encouraged me to go and play solo to step in for the band. My pals Duck and Kieran were putting on the show and were happy to have me play. They're both from the indie rock scene and changed the name on the board outside to “Tragical History Tour”. I played for them again a couple of weeks later and once again they'd written “Tragical History Tour” on the board outside. I figured that's as good a name as any, as I was inspired by Against Me and Badly Drawn Boy, insofar as I wanted a name that was ambiguous and could fit either a soloist or a band, as was my original Tragical History Tour
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intent with this project. The irony is that it has taken fifteen years of playing solo to finally have a solid band and be a position to move between the two. So yeah, there was no grand plan behind the name and somewhere, in a box in my uncle's house or somewhere at my mother's, is a cassette tape with my first ever solo recordings from sometime in the late 90s. That tape is marked Verona, so things could have turned out slightly differently! THT has been going for, what? Fifteen years now? How different is “the scene” today compared to when you started? Fifteen years indeed, it was the Spring of 2003 when I played that first show. I was only 20 years old when I started playing by myself and was only just learning that “DIY punk” was even really a thing, after years of actively doing it without realising that there was a name for it or that there was any kind of network associated with it. Truly, I was young, naïve and delusional, but we always had the drive to get out there and create things for ourselves, so I suspect we were kind of in our own little bubble to begin with. I was never one of the cool kids and cliques were always repugnant to me, even though we've been accused many, many times of being “elitist”, “snobby”, “posers”, “fascists” and all other kinds of weird and wonderful things. Some may carry weight, others less so, but I try not to think about these things too much. The biggest change for me, personally, is the sheer number of people that I've gotten to know over the last fifteen years. When I started, I didn't have a clue what I was doing. Since then I've been lucky enough to learn from some of the greatest teachers that the world has to offer, drinking in their lessons and trying to make some sense of it all as a positive force. I think we all harboured rock star delusions when we were younger, I certainly did, and it's a steep learning curve when you realise that the music industry is 99% smoke and mirrors bullshit. I always come back to the thought of “what are you trying to achieve?” (immortalised on Schoolboy Errors by Uniforms). That intent have evolved greatly for me over the years but I'm grateful for all the learning experiences I've been afforded. To answer your question though, the scene is massively different yet still exactly the same in many ways. The tropes and fashions may have changed somewhat by the infrastructure remains largely the same; there will also be a hundred scenesters and posers for every diamond doing the hard graft. Ye do what ye can with what ye got, that's what we always say. How come it's taken this long for a full-length to materialise? Not for lack of songs or will anyways! I guess the main reason is that THT hasn't always been my “main” focus; it was always something that I did outwith whatever band I was playing in at the time. I was in 13 Broken Fingers when THT started, then went onto join The Try Hards after that. I would always go back to THT in between bands and obviously always played by myself whilst in bands, but my solo stuff was never really my primary focus, I wanted a band. Joey Terrifying got really busy and once we were finished, Uniforms were insanely busy for the first four years that we were together, so there wasn't really a huge focus on doing specifically THT, it was always more something that I'd do by myself in my own time or when there was downtime with the bands. While I was always playing shows and recording, there was always way more band and label stuff to be planned, which takes up loads of time. These days, it seems as though actually Tragical History Tour
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playing and making music takes up only a fraction of my time, which is an absolute chronic sin but a necessary evil I guess. It wasn't until Uniforms went on hiatus (it was actually a full-blown break-up at the time but things change...) that I refocussed on THT a little; I invested so much emotionally into both Joey Terrifying and Uniforms that I wasn't prepared to open myself up to that kind of hurt again, so I doubled-down to try and heal my heart with my acoustic guitar. It's been over three years since then but I knew it was time. The time is now. Speaking of the album, how did you come to release it alongside Team Beard and myself? Life is better with friends. I do all the label side of Make That A Take myself and have done records for other people, so I guess logic says that it'd have been easy and natural to do it myself, but I like working collectively, especially with those who present as having faith in what you do. These are challenging times and, to me, this is a challenging record, so it's smart to surround yourself with like-minds if you're going to war. We've been friends for a decade now, same with the dudes at Team Beard. To me, it felt like the home team and seemed a total no-brainer. I guess we could've shopped the record around to some labels and tried to get something “bigger” on the go, but harkening back to a previous question, I'm not trying to achieve global super-stardom or anything ludicrous like that, I'm just trying to get shit done. As one who seemingly cannot sit still, I'm drawn to those who I feel share similar afflictions. There's a lot of vulnerability on this record, I needed to surround myself with allies. Death. Mental health problems. Sobriety. Sexuality. The album covers all of this and pulls no punches. Were there ever any moments when you felt you'd delved too deep into something and had to back up? Many, and I still have those moments at times – trepidations – but, honestly, my thinking with this record was “fuck it, nothing is off the table”. There are definitely things on the record that are hinted at but not explored too deeply, but overall, I feel reasonably confident that I've handled some potentially delicate subject matters with all the subtlety and honesty I could muster. While a lot of it is not explicit – I tried to avoid being overly prescriptive – there is definitely a delicate balance in the there and many things are alluded to rather than being explicitly addressed, to protect myself and others as much as anything else. Deconstructing existence can be a harrowing experience; it takes nerve and guts to face down the ugliest truths about ourselves and accept that many of things that we have taken for granted our whole lives; security, love, comfort, life, faith, belief, structure, culture, privilege; are merely constructions and perhaps not empirically true. This record is about transformation, about facing down the demons and opening yourself up to immersive love, about survival and shedding delusions, about transcending our empty vessels and seeing life in another light. When all you hope is gone and you're staring death in the face, what is there to fear from facing reality? Everything, of course, and it's scary as fuck to realise that everything you think you know is not quite what you think it is. I live with these thoughts all the time, it would've been dishonest of me and a a misrepresentation if I were to release a record that shied away from these things. It's a broken hearted desperate attempt to try and make some sense of a world full of hate and misery. There are few things Tragical History Tour
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scarier than facing the truth about the ugliest parts of ourselves. I live there, I'm trying to transcend this conscious space. In the immortal words of Bruce Springsteen, “everything dies, baby, that's a fact”. When the inevitable happens, will you be happy with the legacy you've left behind? I try to accept reality as it presents itself to me. I accept death. It's something I've spent many years meditating upon and much time thinking about, it's not something that scares me. While suffering is inevitable, I don't necessary believe that it is the default of the human experience but a thread in the beautiful tapestry of existence, whatever we make of it. I'm not a nostalgic person; I fear nostalgia more than I fear death. I've been accused of being a “shark” in the past, I have a complete inability to sit still, physically or mentally, and it's something I need to work on constantly. I'm acutely aware of my privilege in the same way I'm acutely familiar with my suffering. I know rationally that I've been blessed with good fortune and that I'm not afraid of hard graft, but I don't often stop smell the roses, to truly appreciate all I have and the wonderful people that I've shared these growing and learning experiences with. No matter how glorious or painful they may have been, I'm grateful for them all as they've brought me to where I am today. I don't know about legacy; I'm no teacher, no guide, nothing special, I'm just a human bozo trying to do what I can with what I've got. The last fifteen years have been a roller-coaster on a scale I'd never have imagined if you'd told me back in 2003 and my own little universe has transformed beyond recognition. I'll never be able to satisfactorily express my gratitude, trapped by the limitations for language. I sing to stay well, to try and exorcise the demons, to stay on the boat, as a reason to stay alive, to try and be a positive force, to transcend this conscious space. I sing for agency, for intimacy, for revolution, for love. If you don't understand without an explanation, you'll never understand.
Further Reading: Make-That-a-Take Records Aaahh!!! Real Records Team Beard Records
www.makethatatakerecords.com www.real-records.co.uk www.facebook.com/TeamBeardRecords
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