The Kirk Women's Newsletter - FALL 2016

INTERVIEW WITH NEW WOMEN’S MINISTRY DIRECTOR, DAWN JONES

MEET ANNA MARIA VAN SCHURMAN, A HISTORICAL BIO FROM SARAH WHITE

SPOTLIGHT MINISTRY LIFE UNIVERSITY, PARTNERSHIP WITH THRIVE STL

FALL INTO FUN JOIN US ON SOCIAL MEDIA THIS HOLIDAY SEASON

We are so glad that you are here!

by Courtney Doctor Welcome to the FIRST EDITION of Kirk of the Hills Women’s Ministry publication! Our hope is that this will be a place for us to connect and communicate with each other . . . and have some fun in the process!

This has been an exciting year so far in Women’s Ministry. We have seen the Lord bring new women into our midst; we have seen many new initiatives take off and bear fruit; and we have seen the Lord bless us with unity, joy, purpose, and hope.

Our theme verse in Women’s Ministry this year is James 2:14a, “What good is it my brothers (or, in this case, sisters) if someone says (s)he has faith but does not have works?” And the obvious answer James is looking for to his rhetorical question is, “it is of no good at all!” Why? Because true faith is always expressed through what we do. So we are on a mission this year to find new ways to 1) GROW our faith and 2) express our faith through what we DO. There are many ways to GROW in your faith, but one of the best ways to do that is through a discipleship relationship. “Discipleship” is simply entering into an intentional friendship for the purpose of growing together in Christ. In the context of these relationships, you can choose to focus on Bible study, challenges of life at different stages and ages, skills for godly living, or a variety of other options.

Each discipleship relationship looks different, but all are for the purpose of applying God’s Word to the fabric of our daily lives.

Another great way to GROW in your faith is by participating in a Bible study. We have Bible studies on Tuesday mornings and Wednesday nights. Refresh & Refuel is a Bible study that meets once a month in

And NO… our newsletter is NOT really going to be called

“IRONWoman”.

As we are launching our publication, we want YOU to be a part of the creative process!

Do you have an idea for a name that would represent our publication well and represent its theme (as described in Courtney’s “welcome”)?

Please send your ideas to kamibelmont@gmail.com!

Our upcoming February / March edition will have our new name and logo!

someone’s home. There are also neighborhood Bible studies that you could join . . . or consider starting one in your neighborhood!

In addition to growing in our faith, we want to be women that put our faith into ACTION! So I want to ask you to conduct a little “self-diagnostic” using our theme verse — ask yourself where you are currently expressing your faith through good works. If you find that you would like to find some new ways to do just that, then consider this an invitation to join us as we, together, pursue putting our faith into action!

There are opportunities for you to cook for Life University or Grace and Peace Women’s Shelter. There are opportunities for you to tutor a n d m e n t o r t h r o u g h t h e Ad o p t - A - S c h o o l p r o g ra m , opportunities to disciple other women, opportunities to start a Bible study in your neighborhood or workplace . . . these are just a few of a myriad of ways you can put your faith into action!

The Women’s Ministry at The Kirk of the Hills exists to provide ways for us to walk together as disciples of Jesus. This will include both GROWING and DOING. So please join us by creatively thinking of ways to do this, praying that the Lord would bless our efforts, and inviting others to join in the fun!

And as we do, may our faith be living and active, growing and vibrant . . . and expressed through many good works!

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Learning for the Glory of God THOUGHTS FROM THE LIFE OF ANNA MARIA VAN SCHURMAN (1607 - 1678)

BY SARAH PATTERSON WHITE

Anna Maria van Schurman was born in 1607 into a Christian family from the Dutch city of Utrecht.

Anna Maria’s parents valued education, and they quickly noticed their little girl’s aptitude for learning. From a young age, she received the same rigorous homeschooling as her brothers.

Anna Maria’s training bore fruit rapidly. By the time she was a teenager, she was skilled in languages, arts, and music. She had already begun corresponding with thinkers whose ideas she admired, a practice she continued throughout her life. By the 1630s, her learned reputation drew visits from European queens and even the philosopher Descartes. (She fervently rejected his remark that reading the Bible in Hebrew was a waste of time!) Among her correspondents were prominent theologians such as Gisbertus Voetius, who enabled her to attend theology lectures at the Academy of Utrecht. The only catch was that she had to stay concealed behind a curtain so as not to distract the male students.

Her correspondence with André Rivet, professor at the University of Leiden, resulted in her best-known work, an essay titled “Whether the Study of Letters is Fitting for a Christian Woman.” Anna Maria’s treatise does not make for a cozy read. She writes in the highly formalized style of the day’s academics, which can be offputting for those not trained to follow it, and dry for those who are.

But in doing so, she engages with fellow intellectuals on their turf, building a logical case for women’s learning. She denies that the goal

of studies ought to be “vainglory . . . or idle curiosity, but rather the general goal of the glory of God and the salvation of one’s soul in order that she may emerge the better and happier and may educate and guide her family (if that duty falls to her) and even be useful to her whole sex, to the extent that that is possible.”

She places particular emphasis on those subjects that augment the study of Scripture (such as logic, history, and languages), while not discounting the value of more artistic pursuits, and even the theoretical study of speech and politics. Whatever the focus of study, “whoever is created by God with a countenance raised and erect toward the heavens is suited for the knowledge…of lofty and heavenly things.” She closes her essay by urging parents to be mindful of their educational duty from their daughters’ infancy.

Anna Maria does not assume that every woman has the ability (or the desire!) to master half a dozen

languages, or linger over stacks of books. We needn’t imitate Anna Maria’s erudition, which is nearly as unique in our day as it would have been in hers. But, as opportunity affords, we can emulate her lifelong openness to learning new things— and her boldness in asking questions and voicing ideas.

Today, women enjoy greater access to education than the pioneering Anna Maria, hidden in her corner of the lecture hall.

But do we give learning its due as an aspect of discipleship?

Do we encourage the deeper study of theology and related fields, or generally allot these subjects to those who will pastor churches or teach seminary?

Anna Maria’s example shows that, within our Reformed heritage, these pursuits have been valued, even for women, even when they are not part of one’s professional goals.

As Anna Maria put it, “nothing so occupies the whole mind of a girl as does study: to which, as to a place of refuge, she may be allowed to flee on any occasion.”

SARAH PATTERSON WHITE GREW UP OUTSIDE OF PITTSBURGH, PENNSYLVANIA. SHE AND HER HUSBAND, KEVIN, NOW LIVE IN SAINT LOUIS AND ARE MEMBERS AT THE KIRK. SHE HAS EARNED A B.A. IN ENGLISH AND RELIGIOUS STUDIES FROM HOLLINS UNIVERSITY, AS WELL AS AN MDiv FROM YALE DIVINITY SCHOOL. SARAH IS CURRENTLY PURSUING A PhD FROM WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY IN EARLY CHURCH HISTORY.

Together: Walking Out of D

RECENTLY, VANESSA K. HAWKINS, OUR VERY OWN WOMEN’S MINISTRY INTERN, MET UP FirstLight IS A MINISTRY TO THOSE WHO ARE STRUGGLING WITH SEXUAL SIN, AS WELL A

DAWN OPENED THE INTERVIEW BY TELLING VANESSA ABOUT FirstLight’s EDUCATIONAL [Vanessa] Tell me a little about FirstLight.

[Dawn] FirstLight is a parachurch organization that serves in two ways: we provide direct care for those who are sexual strugglers and for spouses of sexual strugglers. We also have an educational component for groups and also churches. We want the participants to walk away from group sessions understanding a little bit more about the struggle that’s impacting their lives.

We also go into churches, and we help the churches understand how they can walk alongside people who are struggling sexually, as well as their spouses. A lot of times, churches just don’t know what to do. They don’t understand enough about the topic to even address it, let alone walk with those struggling sexually. FirstLight is helping the Church understand what’s going on so that the Church itself can create a conversation about it, which would then help people who are struggling come forward and say, “I need help,” and feel safe in doing that.

[Vanessa] What would you say about the need that you’ve seen in churches? Is it taboo because that demographic is less inclined to need those services? Or is it taboo just because of the impropriety some people think of having that conversation? You said that some ministers won’t say “sex” in the pulpit — so how do you gauge that? Why do you think that is?

[Dawn] Culturally speaking, in Western culture, sex isn’t something we talk about. You can see the evolution of sex — probably not until the last 40 or 50 years when things became a little bit more provocative culturally speaking. It’s just something that’s been hidden. Knowing this, think about “I Love Lucy.” They had two separate bedrooms, right? Culturally speaking, people in leadership are from a generation when sex just wasn’t talked about in the homes or anywhere.

[Vanessa] In addition to your support groups, do you also offer individualized counseling?

[Dawn] No, when it comes to individual counseling, we have a group of counselors that we have relationships with that we refer to. So we do not do therapy. A lot of times in our groups, you will hear the leader say, “Have you talked to your therapist about that?” Because it is a support group, and there can feel like there is some overlap in content between w h a t yo u m ay t a l k a b o u t i n yo u r counseling session and what you talk about in your group, but there’s a line.

When we’re training our facilitators, we’re helping them identify that line and helping them to encourage people to depend upon their pastors or their counselors to dig deeper into some of those things. We consider ourselves a ministry that walks alongside of people, and the Church, and the counselors, and so the work that we do with the individuals should support the work that they are doing already in counseling or in pastoral counseling. And if they don’t have those resources, we try to connect them to those.

[Vanessa] Being the catalyst for such powerful change in people’s lives can lead to a strong attachment to those providing the help. What do you do to remain “parachurch” and not become center?

[Dawn] In my experience, we don’t have that challenge because we strive to have a healthy relationship with the churches.

We operate under the understanding that we cannot be successful in our work if the churches are not connected to what we’re doing. And so a lot of the relationships that we have with the churches have come from us teaching, in a sense, in the church — kind of encouraging them, saying, “Hey, this is going on. We need to talk about it.” And, as such, we build a very healthy relationship with them. From the

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TO LEARN MORE ABOUT FirstLight’s MINISTRY IN THE ST. LOUIS AREA, VISIT THEIR WEBSITE AT: http://www.firstlightstlouis.org/

P WITH DAWN JONES — THE NEW WOMEN’S MINISTRY DIRECTOR OF FirstLight Saint Louis.

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participants, we don’t require that they have a church home, because we just want to help them. But we do encourage them to have that support from the Church. On the Women’s side of it — whether we’re talking about the Sexual Integrity group, or we’re talking about the Spousal group — in both cases, we are talking about support systems. “What are your support needs? Have you found anyone safe in your church? What does it look like to look for someone safe in the church?” We really challenge them to really depend upon the body of Christ and the community that you find in your church home, because it’s really important beyond the group. Because there’s going to be a time when they’re not in that group anymore, so we hope that they have the support that they need to continue on the journey.

[Vanessa] What can churches do to be that “safe place”?

[Dawn] I think that the topic being present in the life of the church automatically creates a safe space. And the conversation has to be had creatively in a way where we don’t shame. A lot of churches find it difficult to balance the biblical standard of sexuality and, at the same time, embrace people in the midst of their struggles. I always encourage people to look back at the example that Jesus gave. That wasn’t a struggle for Him. Truth is truth; sin is sin.

In spite of that, He showed people so much grace and love and compassion, even when He challenged them to go and sin no more — even in those moments when He was honest about people’s lifestyles. It was done in a way where at the end of it, He was saying, “All I want for you is a greater love,” which in that case was Himself.

[Vanessa] Tell me about what attracted you to this role at FirstLight.

[Dawn] The narrative of FirstLight overlaps with my story in some ways, and I experienced a certain [amount] of loneliness in dealing with the way in which it overlaps, because it wasn’t something that was being talked about in the church. For me, being able to do this work means being that voice for believers and saying, “Hey, it’s real. It’s a real struggle, and we’re here with you and for you to walk with you in this very specific way.” And so, in a sense, I have this weird and uncanny desire to sit with people in a very dark place, and I’m not afraid of that. In many ways, it’s very riveting for me. I challenge people not to get the imagery of me walking around in the darkness with them — because sometimes I’m sitting there, literally, until they’re brave enough to stand, and then we walk out. It’s a process, but I’m not afraid of being there. Sexual struggle is a very dark thing that thrives in the dark, so it is a privilege for me to sit with them in that dark place and, in a sense, help them grip the hand of Christ.

[Vanessa] How does your walk with the Lord inform how you lead?

[Dawn] I’m sure you’ve heard aspects of this as I was talking, but because of how blindly, in a sense, I dove in head first to the Lord — to His reign, to relationship with Him — I lead from a mindset of This is not about me. I remember talking to friends, and I said to them that the primary thing I love about my job, in thinking about therapy, is that I help the clients know that they don’t have to own their story. And, in doing that, I can’t own it either. The only person who owns it is Christ, and He left it on the cross.

So because of my relationship with Christ — the way that I experienced His sacrifice on the cross — that’s how I walk with Him. So, in my mind, healing is a place where you move through the pain, and you put the pain where it belongs — which is on Christ. (continued on back)

[Vanessa] What would you say is the biggest misconception about FirstLight?

[Dawn] Th a t a l l we t a l k a b o u t i s homosexuality. When FirstLight started, it started as a recognition of the same sex struggle in the Church, and a way in which FirstLight could help love and support those individuals. And so, from that, more recognition began to happen — “Wait. . . porn is an issue in the Church as well.” And the spouses are impacted. We have a group that is just spouses, too. We see the evolution of the ministry — so, that’s a piece of the misconception.

But another piece of it is that the Church, for whatever reason, is more comfortable talking about homosexuality than they are talking about heterosexual struggles. My theory is that, in order to begin to talk about heterosexual struggles, the heterosexuals have to be honest. As long as we talk about homosexuals, we are talking about “them.” It feeds into the “us” / “them” mentality that is inevitable in the Western culture, and in the Church.

[Vanessa] What would you like churches to know, then, about FirstLight?

[Dawn] I would like for churches to know that, because we uphold the biblical standard of sexuality, we address all ways in which sexuality is impacted by sin — including homosexual and heterosexual struggles. We don’t exclude, either.

We can’t exclude ages either!

We’re working toward including in the conversation adolescents and children and youth. And so, that’s what I want people to know about FirstLight — we are not limited to one section of sexuality, because the Bible isn’t limited to that.

[Vanessa] What are your most immediate needs, and how should we be praying for you?

[Dawn] I would say “immediate needs” are going to be volunteers [to lead] groups. We need more people who are willing to serve and money. We have amazing people who give, but resources have a bottom.

My prayer would be that more people would come forward for help, specifically women. We have b ee n t au g h t s o m et h i ng ver y specific about sexuality as it pertains to being a woman, and our exploration of that is either all the way “Left” (where we explore l

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freely, because it’s “our right”), or all the way “Right” (where sexuality as a woman isn’t acknowledged).

And so when you have sexual struggles, we [as women] have so much shame, because it’s almost like, “I’m a woman. I should not have these struggles. This is a man’s thing.” And so the prayer is two part: (1) More women will begin to say, “I have this problem. I have this struggle. I need help.” (2) That the leaders in the churches will let us come in and talk to their women.

I’ve found that ministry leaders have a very difficult time bringing their women into the conversation, for many reasons. I’m definitely praying that more people will come forward, and praying that we will continue to build healthy relationships with the churches, that we will build relationships with more churches, and be able to walk alongside churches, as well, as they attempt to help their congregations with this issue.

DAWN JONES GRADUATED WITH AN M.A. in COUNSELING FROM COVENANT SEMINARY. IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO CONTACT HER, PLEASE E-MAIL HER AT dawn@firstlightstlouis.org.

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Want to get involved?

Here are some photos of our 2016 Trivia Night.

This year’s event promises to be even more fun!

Life University:

Mark your calendars!

On Friday, Jan. 20, 2017, plan to attend a Trivia Night at the Kirk to raise funds to continue the work of “Life University”!

a partnership with

a reflection from Janet Tubbesing

About one year ago I began praying for an opportunity to serve locally by helping the poor, widowed, or orphaned whom Jesus calls us to care for. My answer came this fall via “Life University” offered through Thrive, a pro-life ministry the Kirk supports. The young women we meet with had previously attended “Parent University,” a series of classes sponsored by Thrive to help graduates as they learn to parent their newborns, After finishing these courses, many desired deeper instruction in life skills and regular discipleship with women who would meet regularly with them.

In “Life University,” Anna Porter, Lacy Stegmann, Stephanie Stair, and I meet with four young women every other Wednesday night at the Kirk. We prayerfully began in September. I prayed the ladies would feel very loved and welcomed as they walked into our church as strangers, llllllllllllllll

stepping out of their comfort zone and into our world. We have seen the Lord already grow our relationships with our new friends and answer our prayers.

They bring their children who play with our children, and we all share a meal together. Kirk members have supplied all the wonderful food. We then spend the next hour learning from various Kirk members who have taught thus far about child development, the importance of reading with your children, and creating family traditions. On alternate weeks we meet oneon-one to listen to, pray for, and encourage one another. Marcus Hawkins has also been meeting with a husband who has been attending with his family. What a blessing this relationship is.

A couple of things have really struck me. This ministry has been embraced by the Kirk as many in the body have used lllllll

their gifts by providing food, teaching during large group sessions, fundraising through bake sales, planning behind the scenes, and praying. I have also b e e n a m aze d a t t h e l ove , enthusiasm, appreciation and openness our new friends have shown to us. They are blessing us with the privilege of being a support to them during a very difficult season, as they are working (often multiple jobs) to support their young families.

I would ask the Kirk family to pray that those involved in “Life University” would continue to feel loved and cared for by each of their mentors and every Kirk member they meet. We pray this is only the beginning of an ongoing ministry and partnership with Thrive for many years to come. Please pray about how God might lead you to use your gifts in supporting this work. You'll be deeply blessed.

WANT TO SUBMIT AN ARTICLE FOR AN UPCOMING WOMEN’S NEWSLETTER?

Fall Into Fun

a reflection by Sally Johnston

I had no idea what to expect. I had no idea what my guests would think of the evening. I had no idea what essential oils were, although I had signed up for that workshop. But I did know that my guests would be warmly welcomed by my friends at the Kirk (and they were) - and that we would have a really great time (which we did).

Contact our women’s ministry intern,

VANESSA K. HAWKINS vanessa.hawkins @thekirk.org with your idea, article, or reflection from a recent women’s ministry event.

We would love to include your writing in an upcoming edition!

Join us!

I invited five of my friends to join us for Fall Into Fun. These women are neighbors of the Kirk – but we don’t normally get to enjoy their company. Most of us went to the watercolor workshop with Lyn Zick and then to the workshop on using essential oils with Sue Ellen Minich.

One of my friends went to Janet Tubbesing’s workshop on hosting holiday neighborhood teas. She was so interested in the idea of hosting a holiday tea, and she said she really enjoyed Janet’s vision for hosting such an event. I am hoping that she will be joining us for the Kirk Christmas tea, which will be an example of Janet’s vision in action.

Events such as “Fall Into Fun” offer really natural and easy ways to invite friends into our midst — neighbors, co-workers, family members — to learn from them, and to introduce them to our friends at the Kirk. I will be inviting all of these ladies back in the future, and I hope they will experience the hospitality, warmth, fun, and great childcare that I have come to expect from our women’s ministry events.

MARK YOUR CALENDAR AND REGISTER FOR THESE EVENTS:

CHRISTMAS TABLETOPS — SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3rd (10:00 a.m. - noon)

Join us for a morning to remember! We will enjoy tea, coffee, and holiday treats and get ideas for holiday hosting as we admire the beautiful table settings of each hostess!

As we enjoy time together with friends and neighbors, we will also hear a Christmas message about the "Rest of the Story" from our women’s ministry director, Courtney Doctor.

TRIVIA NIGHT (to benefit “Life University”) — FRIDAY, JANUARY 20th (6:00 - 9:00 p.m.)

Put your own team/table together, or join another . . . but don’t miss our second annual Trivia Night as we come together for a fun time and some friendly competition!

WOMEN’S RETREAT — FRIDAY, MARCH 31st - SATURDAY, APRIL 1st All women are invited to travel with us to the YMCA Trout Lodge (about an hour away) where there is something for everyone (hiking, sitting by the lake, a craft room, horseback riding, and a whole lot more)! We will receive rich teaching from Christy Gambrell (pictured), a graduate of Covenant Theological Seminary who currently serves as the Director of Women’s Ministry at Orangewood Church just outside of Orlando, FL.