Why do we pray? by Emily Henning

Emily Henning

photo by Kristi Verde

Why do we pray? By Emily Henning

Prayer saved my life. Prayer saved my husband’s life. Prayer brought us our daughter’s life. This is the story of why I pray.

When we got married, I was full of arrogance and hypocrisy. My husband and I were part of a church that believed it was the only right denomination, that anyone outside of that particular branch of Christianity was doomed to Hell, and I, like they, walked around secretly judging people based solely on whether or not they attended a church in that denomination. Looking back now, truthfully, the particular congregation my husband and

I were part of would very likely be considered by most of the world to be a cult. They isolated us from people who were not members of the denomination, scared us into attendance, and judged harshly those who strayed from their teachings, including forcing several young women into marriages for which they were not ready. Yet, blind to those things at the time, and even defending many of them, my husband and I proudly called ourselves members, despite the fact that by the time we got married we were attending services sparsely and were living rather secularly between Sundays. In our minds, however, we were living life the best

that it could be lived in an imperfect world and we were going to have a beautiful, perfect, happy marriage because we were such great friends and had been together for so long. We were better than the rest of the world because we went to church, said kind things (out loud and in public anyway), and prayed (at least, in a church service). We were very much saved by works, and to us it seemed we were doing all the works.

Engagement Photo

by Kristi Verde

Then God humbled us. During our engagement, a family dispute broke out which ripped away everything in which my husband and I had placed our security. Then after the wedding we moved in together in the small town in which my husband was attending medical school and I knew nobody. I moved there thinking it would be the best years of my life because I was finally married

to my very best friend. Then reality set in, and so did depression. I was the loneliest I had ever been in my life. I was completely and utterly alone. Or so I thought. But God never leaves us or forsakes us, and He draws to Himself His own. His word does not go out into the world profitless, and soon all those words began to make themselves clear to me

A few weeks after moving to our new home, I began attending a mid-week worship service at (gasp!) a church outside of “our” denomination- mostly because another medschool wife was attending and I was desperate for friendship. The funny thing is, she didn’t even show up the first week I went. But the pastor was preaching a series on forgiveness and it felt like he was talking directly to me! And the way these people prayed...I had never heard anything like it.

They were so genuine, the prayers so organic. It was like they really believed they were talking to God and that He was listening and that He cared what they had to say. I had never heard anything like it. Within a few weeks of attending this service, I knew that’s where we needed to attend on Sundays. There were only two problems: my husband would never agree to attend a church outside of our denomination, and I worked as a pianist for another church on Sundays. So I began to pray. I had no idea what I was doing, because every prayer I had uttered in the last 5 years at least had been out of obligation and completely without faith. But I prayed earnestly and over the next two weeks, my husband noticed God changing my heart. He noticed I was kinder and more patient. He noticed I was happier and more peaceful. He noticed me reading my Bible that had been sitting and collecting dust for who knows how long. I waited patiently on God, in prayer, for my husband to be the one to bring up attending this church. And meanwhile, his heart began to change too. He wasn’t praying yet, but he was picking up his Bible and asking the hard questions about what he believed and why. He was engaging me in conversation about what I was learning and why I was changing. Finally, he turned to me and said we needed to trust God with the finances, I needed to quit working on Sunday mornings, and we were going to attend this church together. Within six months, both of us had accepted Christ as the true savior of our lives.

This obviously significantly increased my faith in the power of prayer, but there was so much that the Lord taught me in the coming months. After taking a 50% cut in pay (I worked Saturday nights as well), we had no clue how we were going to get through the year. We trusted God would provide and prayed hard for the finances. I kid you not, to this day, we don’t know where the money came from. In a year we should have been $6000 short of eating and making rent, yet we had enough surplus to give several hundred dollars to a family who was paying to go on a missions trip! Over the next months and years we continued to trust God in prayer with so many things. I could write a book about the miracles God has worked in our lives since I started praying with real faith in the One who desires to provide. One of the most amazing prayers He answered for us was for our daughter. I have Type 1 Diabetes, which is an autoimmune disorder

that keeps my body from producing a digestive hormone called insulin. It is not impossible for me to be pregnant, but there are certain risks involved, especially if my blood sugars are out of control before and during pregnancy. My husband and I knew we wanted to start a family, but my sugars were so bad and it seemed like nothing I did helped. So we prayed. Every three months, I get my a1c tested (that’s like an average blood sugar over the last three months). Doctors want mine under 7, unless I am pregnant, then they want it under 6.5. My a1c was 9.2. It would literally take a miracle to get it under 6.5 between February and May, but that’s what we prayed for if God desired us to start a family at that time. When I got my results back in May, my a1c was 6.4 and we knew God’s plan for us was to have a baby! But that wasn’t the end of the road. It was one thing to get a good a1c prepregnancy, but a whole different obstacle to keep it there during pregnancy. Not once during my pregnancy was my a1c above 5.7 and our daughter was perfectly healthy and free of any diabetes-related complications! Praise the Lord!

Early Pregnancy

photo by Kristi Verde

So what is my point? I wholeheartedly believe in the power of faith-filled prayer to a God who loves us, desires the best for us, and will meet us where we are. I am far from perfect at this, but He was able to take two extremely proud, lukewarm sinners and meet us where we were in our imperfect, but earnest, seeking of Him. Through prayer, He completely transform our hearts, minds, and faith. He was able to provide for us some very real temporal needs, and change our priorities so we can trust Him whenever a “felt” need isn’t met. Prayer is not a duty to be checked off a checklist. It’s not a quick-add wish list. It is a living, breathing relationship with the God who loves us, gave His son for us, and communes with us through His Spirit, who is very much alive and working in this world today.

We are now in a new city for my husband’s OB/GYN Residency. How we got here involves miracle after miracle from God, but to be honest I’ve been in a dark place and having to remind myself of that truth over and over. We are in a completely different state, living with a toddler hours away from any friends or family, and I am once again facing the loneliness I faced at the beginning of our marriage. But there’s one major difference. I have God. I have faith. I have prayer this time. And here is why I pray now. I have seen prayer produce humility. I have seen prayer provide temporally. I am currently experiencing prayer create friendship. I am in a new place and have not yet had much luck forming friendships. But there is an everpresent God with whom I can be so real, with whom I can share my deepest thoughts, my tears, my joy, my

concerns, who I know placed us here, has a plan that’s always better than my own, and wants to see us thrive. Prayer is how we communicate. Prayer is how we love Him and feel loved by Him. Prayer is our greatest weapon against doubt, fear, depression, loneliness, and anger. Prayer is our greatest form of worship to a God who I now know will NEVER leave me or forsake me.

So why should you pray? Because it works. Because it’s powerful. Because there’s aGod who knows you fully. Loves you perfectly, Delights Himself in you. Anddesperately desires fellowship with you.

Emily J. Henning

EmilyJHenning.com