nuclear normality

from March 2023

gabe elzein

We must eliminate judgments based on family and housing situations

by laura shareshian family room staff

In 2008, the bones and teeth of two parents and their two sons were discovered, some 4,600 years old. Although this structure dates back millennia, what we call the nuclear family — two parents and a few children as the family unit — didn't take cultural dominance in the U.S. until the 20th century, in the years following World War II. This trend largely persists today, but it's time we consider our changing world and the way we address it.

Many psychologists aﬃrm the nuclear family as a perfectly healthy arrangement; they agree that children are best raised with safety and safety-nets.

However, the Pew Research Center's 2014 Parenting in America research revealed that the nuclear family has been on a steady decline since its post-World War II boom. This same research found that, in 2014, only 46% of families still subscribed to the "traditional" structure of two married parents in their ﬁrst marriage with children.

Although the nuclear family remains culturally and socially dominant, non-conventional families constitute a substantial percentage of our population. Meaning that, if your own household doesn’t fall under the label — you still probably know somebody’s who does.

Furthermore, socioeconomic status draws a clear line; in 2021, the U.S. Census found that 31% of children living in single-parent households were below the poverty line. Moreover, a quarter of young adults lived in multigenerational homes — homes with two or more adult generations. This number is up from 9% in 1971.

Like the varying trends surrounding the home-owning nuclear family, our idea of the standard healthy home shifts. It’s uncommon to see open vitriol for apartment tenants or for a family formed from remarriage. But assumptions and insensitivity lay in wait for everyday conversation.

When we treat having a private garage, backyard or basement as a given, we implicitly exclude those without. Quickly, the alienation can turn into frustration or shame, and

By The Numbers

46% of children live in nuclear families then lead to tangible consequences: friends aren't invited over and the realities of living situations are concealed for the worse. What left the mouth as an oﬀhand comment can quickly become something damaging and hurtful. live with a single parent

There is no one universal standard for where and how to live; the norm for housing varies from area-to-area. This variation can be seen in rates of home ownership, demonstrating what portion of a population owns their own property.

15%

26% live with two parents in remarriage

Still, avoiding conversations surrounding the home is not a practical approach. These discussions inevitably arise; where and how we live comprises a great deal of who we are.

5% live with cohabiting parents live without a parent present

In response, we could try to expand the definition of a “normal family,” bolstering inclusivity for the current finite list of irregular homelives. But as time has proven, the family is constantly evolving, leaving new demographics behind. Where or how someone lives is almost never morally charged. Homelives are deeply personal — and often uncontrollable — situations. They are not reflections of character, ability or potential, and treating them as such is unfounded and disregards individuality.

We must address families and living situations with the neutrality they are due; there is no one right way to live.

95.8% Ladue St. Louis City

44.7%

St. Louis County

68.8%

...of homes are owner-occupied

Coffee and tea are globalized

“Chai is a famous tea in Pakistan that everyone drinks. Chat masala is a spice widely used in a lot of dishes, and paratha and roti is kind of like how bread is used in America.”

Fatima Jahangir (11)